August 2014 | Community Spirit Magazine by Community Spirit Magazine

n’s o s n h o J a n n a e g r Geo M ir a c u lo u s T r a n s fo r m at iohnt loss eig

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ALSO INSIDE

PEOPLE YOU SHOULD KNOW... TONY WINTERS, PAGE COLE, & KEITH BOYD - THE LEMONADE KID

WORD

EXPLOSION AUGUST 10-17 2014

W E X .V I C T O R Y. C O M

J O H N H AG E E

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DR. MICHAEL BROWN

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MATTHEW BARNETT

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JOHN BEVERE

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FIND THE LIFE YOU WERE BORN TO LIVE

PAUL DAUGHERTY

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SHARON DAUGHERTY SUN. AUG. 17TH | 9AM

DR. BILLY WILSON

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BILL WINSTON

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MISSIONS AND MINISTERS

CONFERENCE MONDAY AUGUST & TUESDAY AUGUST 12TH

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Contents FEATURES 6 Georgeanna Johnson - Extreme Weight Loss 8 Keith, The Lemonade Kid 10 Tony Winters, Mabee Center 12 Page Cole, Visiting Angels 14 13 Ways to Save Your Lover 16 Tulsa Dream Center Golf Tournament 18 Victory Christian School Story 20 Rejoice Christian Academy 24 Tobacco and Our Kids COLUMNS 22 ACT Financial 23 The “Yes Women Can” Blog - Private Label Realty 26 Kevin Nieman - Cornerstone Counseling Center 30 The Biggest Loser 31 Lose it for the Kids

AUGUST 2014 PUBLISHER & editor Tom McCloud CREATIVE Director Ramond Walker CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Tom McCloud, Randy Cowell, Danny Cahill, Deniece Adsit, Mollie Myer, Kevin Nieman, Lisa Goinse www.mccloudmedia.com • www.communityspiritmagazine.com

Distribution Community Spirit Magazine is distributed to churches, schools, restaurants, Christian bookstores, and other businesses. Call us today to deliver to your church. Community Spirit Magazine is published monthly by McCloud Media. Claims by advertisers and the opinions of writers within this publication do not necessarily represent the views of Community Spirit Magazine or its publisher, Equipment Publications, Inc. Philippians 2:1-2 “If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from His love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.” Our Mission: 1. Build Community – Develop a sense of community among all local believers in Christ 2. Inspire Good Works 3. Support Families 4. Share the Good News of Jesus Christ Fan us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/CommunitySpiritMagazine

C o m m u n i t y S p i ri tma g a zi n e.com AUGUST 2014

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cover story

Georgeanna Johnson’s Miraculous Transformation

s Georgeanna Johnson stepped out of the shower, she fought with herself as whether she should really make the drive to Edmond to audition for ABC’s Extreme Weight Loss. It had been hard enough just to tell her husband she was going to apply. Now time to leave, she really wanted to back out. “This is stupid. Thousands of people will audition for this one spot,” she thought. But somehow, the Holy Spirit just kept encouraging her to “Just Go! Just Try!” Desperate for help, she listened, got in the car and headed down a road which would ultimately change her life. In nearly every aspect, Georgeanna had appeared to be happy. She had a great marriage and two nearly grown girls whom she adored. She loved the Lord and was respected in her church, Church on the Move, where her husband, Scott, serves as an Assistant Pastor. To everyone around her, she appeared to be loving life, but they didn’t know the secret agony she was going through deep down. Through the years, Georgeanna’s weight had spiraled out of control. Weighing over 300 pounds, her size had long passed being a matter of vanity. It was beginning to affect her health. “I used to think about my weight all the time. It burdened me. It was on my mind everyday of my life…the concern about what is this weight going to do to me, how am I going to lose it and what are people thinking about me? It consumed my thoughts. I didn’t have peace. I lived a happy and fulfilled life, but there was this part of me that was sad and lonely in my own head and I beat myself up for my inability to figure it out. Why was this one part of my life so wrong compared to the success I felt I had in our family, in my

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marriage, with our church we love, and in so many other areas of my life? I was content, but certainly not with myself. Georgeanna’s drive to Edmond paid off. Out of all of those thousands of contestants, the producers chose her to be on the show. Before she knew it, she was on her way to Boot camp where she would spend three months in an all out battle to lose the weight. Unlike some of the others on the show, she and her councilors couldn’t identify any deep, dark issues that made her eat. “I look back and I can’t pinpoint what made me turn to food for comfort. For me, it was simple. I needed someone to teach me what to eat and how to work out. Once they did, it immediately started working. And once I got the confidence, it was full steam ahead. Sometimes at night I would cry as I thought, ‘You are finally doing this!” Three months at Boot camp was followed by another seven at home, working out and learning how to eat. Georgeanna lost an incredible amount of weight. She would run into friends on the street and they wouldn’t even recognize her. Her husband, Scott, also got involved. He lost fifty pounds while she was away at Boot camp and the two learned to replace social eating with exercise and feeling good. When the show aired, millions of people watched Georgeanna’s journey and were inspired by her faith and hard work. She had lost 150 pounds, putting her nearly back to the size she was in high school.

understand and have been there. Judging is not our job. Instead, I believe when we have problems like this, God wants to help us. It is like a father who sees his young son pick up a piece of glass in the yard. He will do everything he can to get his son to put it down. In the same way, God wants us to put down the things that hurt us. He wants to get it away from us so we can see Him more clearly.”

Food is a Drug

Faith and Fitness Georgeanna and Scott’s life will never be the same. Working out and eating right has become part of their daily routine. But their journey has affected more than just their waistlines. Through the experience, God has given them a unique platform to share their faith and help others who struggle with food addictions. It has also given them a new perspective on how weight can often affect our faith. Georgeanna explained that although she never felt judged at church, she can see that her weight negatively affected her testimony. “Church members want their pastor and their pastor’s wife to have their life together and know what they are talking about. I often worried about whether people were looking at me and assuming something was not going right in our family. Of course I put that on myself. But, I felt like my appearance was not reflecting who I was. I felt guilty and I often thought, ‘Why am I not treating my body better? God is surely mad at me. He gave me this body and look what I am doing to it.’ All of that added to the cycle of guilt and I was consumed by the negativity I was putting into my head.” Georgeanna and Scott have both learned that weight was not just a physical problem. It is often a symptom of deeper issues. And as they minister, they are now able to understand and connect with people in a special way they couldn’t before. Scott explained. “Before, I never though about weight being a major spiritual issue in people’s lives, my own, or my wife’s. Especially in our relationship, I didn’t see it being a problem. But now I realize that weight can sometimes point to deeper spiritual issues. I am not saying it is a heaven or hell issue, but it does reflect our relationship with God in some ways. As Christians, we overlook the fact that over-eating can be just as harmful as smoking and drugs. We don’t have a problem with saying such other things are wrong, but we overlook food issues. When we talk about taking care of the temple, it is more than just those things we might typically mark as sin. It is a blurry issue, something no one wants to talk about.” “But I certainly don’t judge anyone for their weight. I fully

“Addiction is part of my family history,” Georgeanna explained. “My mom’s parents were alcoholics and although my mom is sober now and hasn’t drank in years, she has struggled with both alcohol and food. Chris (from the show) and I talked about this and I see that I am a food addict. You don’t weight 300 pounds if you aren’t. Every day I get up, I have to decide that I am going to eat good today. I take it one day at a time. It is not over just because I have lost the weight. It is a process I am going to have to be conscious of the rest of my life.” Although the show provided the training and support, it was up to Georgeanna to provide the sweat and determination. She had to not only put in the effort, she also had to change the way she thought about food. “It was my drug of choice. And to this day, I am still often tempted to sit down and eat a bowl of cereal at 11 o’clock at night. It was always my way to relax,” she explained.

A New Me It took a while for Georgeanna to get used to seeing herself in the mirror. And there are still moments when she forgets. “When I get on the scales, sometimes I can’t believe the first number is a one. I went from the 300s, to the 200s, and down into the 100s. Those are the moments when I realize I don’t weight much more than I did in high school. And sometimes at the mall, I still think people are looking at me and thinking, ‘What are you doing here? You can’t fit into our clothes.’ But then, she remembers and she thanks God for the opportunity and His help in making it all happen. Inside and out, a lot has changed about her. And she praises Him for that. Life is much more fun now.

Helping Others Georgeanna is doing her best to help others deal with their food issues. I see men or women who are heavy and my heart goes out to them. I know what it is like. I want people to be able to lie down at night and have a peace about themselves. And if that means losing weight, than I want to help people know they really can get unstuck and make some positive changes. She has started a blog, journaling her efforts to continue to stay healthy. You can visit her website at www.FitIsWell.com. It is based upon the hymn, ‘It is Well with My Soul.’ “In the song, the author describes finding peace, no matter the situation. I had to do that this year. Losing weight helped me find that peace I haven’t felt in a long time. I pray it will help you. There is also a free eBook on some simple diet changes you can make that will make a big difference.” C ommu n ity s p ir itmagazin e.com

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Keith Boyd… The Lemonade Kid S e r v i n g u p Lemons, Wat e r a n d Hugs

ou probably have noticed the stands touting “Keith’s Ice Cold Lemonade.” You may have even stopped in for a glass or two. But if you haven’t met the CEO behind this effort, you are missing out. Keith Boyd, a 10-year-old boy with cerebral palsy, has been “wowing” business leaders all over the Tulsa area with his ability to turn a profit and raise money for a very worthy cause. After graduating from The Little Light House, a phenomenal local school for special needs kids, Keith wanted to “give back.” He had a vision and like all successful CEOs, he put that vision down on paper by writing a business plan. And when it landed in the hands of some local leaders, Keith’s idea for creating Tulsa’s “biggest ever” lemonade stand began. Keith’s mom, Erin, explained that it all started when he wanted to have a special toy. Since it wasn’t Christmas or birthday time, they challenged him to come up with a way to raise the money on his own. Keith decided to sell lemonade in their front yard. Inviting friends to come buy his wonderful lemonade, he raised more money than he needed and they suggested that he give the extra to The Little Light House. So, for the next couple of years, the little entrepreneur sold lemonade and gave the proceeds to the school. Expanding on the idea, Keith came up with a plan to sell lemonade all over town. Now this would be an impressive achievement by any 10-yearold, but when you realize his challenges, it is absolutely incredible. Keith is unable to walk, talk or even make hand gestures. He speaks by using a “Tobii” device that tracks his eye movements. Methodically, he moves a cursor with his eyes, spelling out words, letter by letter. The amazing device not only allows him to communicate, he can also email with it and surf the web.

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Keith an d Pa r en ts, Er in a n d JAMES

Keith loves to support The Little Lighthouse. When we asked him to name the most important thing he learned there, he answered without hesitation. “How Jesus loved me and died for me.” The proceeds from the lemonade stands go directly to help fund a much-needed expansion on The Little Lighthouse campus. The addition will provide more classrooms to make room for a long waiting list of kids hoping to get into the program. Obviously, Keith could not do this on his own. Arthur Greeno, franchise owner of the 71st and Garnett and Woodland Hills Chickfil-a restaurants, along with the folks at Sunkist and Thrive15.com have become Keith’s mentors and friends. Helping organize the effort and providing such things as the website and public relations, they have helped turn the young CEO’s vision into reality. Keith told us that his mentors have taught him “being successful takes hard work.” It is just one of the many lessons he is having to learn. In fact, his mom explained that school has become a challenge because when the teacher is not looking, Keith often is answering emails and thinking about sales. (He can tell you exactly which stands are working and which ones need additional attention.) At times, it is obvious that Keith is teaching his mentors nearly as much as they are teaching him. Arthur Greeno says, “He has taught me about persistence. His Tobii device requires him to spell words out one letter at a time and it takes great effort. Once, I asked him, on average, how many times do you have to spell things out to get his message across? He said, ‘10 times. I feel like I am speaking Dog and no one else speaks Dog.’ In a world where most of us try things once and give up, for a 10 year-old to not be frustrated and continue to try this many times, is impressive.” Arthur also once asked him how he stays positive and doesn’t get

frustrated? Keith said he likes to go outside, and he also likes to de-stress by watching Duck Dynasty. When we asked Keith what he thought of his friend, Mr. Greeno, he spelled out L…O…V…E H…I…M. Obviously, the admiration goes both ways. Keith attends Skelly Elementary School. But when we asked if he wants to go to college some day, he quickly typed out H…E… C…K N…O. His mom explained that he is worried about negotiating through all the traffic of people. He also thinks he will be too busy running a business to go to school. (Sounds like a true entrepreneur!) Keith’s little lemonade business does have the potential to grow. He will soon hit stores with his own packaged lemonade and he hopes it will go national. Proceeds from the sales will go to support United Cerebral Palsy and The Little Light House. Keith’s Ice Cold Lemonade Stands have currently raised over $100,000 for the school and Keith still hopes to ultimately reach $250,000. “I am proud to be a Tulsan,” says Erin. “People have been incredibly supportive.” Keith’s Ice Cold Lemonade Stands will be open for business each Wednesday from 10-2 through the month of August. Don’t miss out on supporting this wonderful fundraising project. And just maybe, you will get a chance to share lemonade with Tulsa’s favorite Lemonade Kid. For more information, visit the website at www.keithsicecoldlemonade.com or his Facebook page at www.facebook.com/ Keithsicecoldlemonadesale.

Keith’s Lemonade (8 Pack)

Give kids with Nonverbal Cerebral Palsy a voice by purchasing Keith’s Ice Cold Lemonade juice boxes. 100% of all proceeds will go to buy special Tobii communication devices for children, like Keith, with Nonverbal Cerebral Palsy. Due to heavy volume, we will ship within 12 weeks. For more information on how to Thrive with Keith go to Thrive15.com

PLEASE THANK THE SPONSORS

Keith recently posted an announcement about a new t-shirt he is making available online. He constructs and monitors his own FB page. He said, “I love this shirt! You can buy it online thecausetulsa.com gets half the proceeds for their mission and half goes to me for my mission!

The folks at Duck Dynasty found out Keith is a big fan. They were impressed with his story and recently sent him a signed duck call. Its is signed, and engraved and has Philippians 4:13 on it. It was presented to Keith by the YBT (Young Christian Businessmen of Tulsa).

What are YOU Standing For? What need do you see in our community that you wish someone else would do? What is YOUR excuse for not doing it yourself? If you still have one, come out and meet Keith. Your excuse will go away.

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Scoring Big Goals for Tulsa

Tony Winters

General Manager, Mabee Center

RU soccer star…turned event promoter, Tony Winters, is indeed “Someone You Should Know.” Using a combination of heart, faith and creativity, he continues to score goals to a make a big difference in our community. Although the cadence of his brogue still points back to his roots in Liverpool, England, Tony is a Tulsan through and through. (He became a citizen four years ago.) He is passionate about our town and especially about its strong Christian community. “Although I fought it a lot in the beginning, it was God who led me here. I have no doubt about it,” he says with certainty. At only 21, he seemingly had it made. He had a great job, plenty of money, a couple of sports cars and lots of friends. He loved Liverpool, owned his own business working as a customs and excise officer and played soccer on the best amateur soccer teams in town. Everything was great until one day, as he starred out the window, God distinctively told him to quit his job and coach kids soccer. “It was a strange thing and I immediately started giving God excuses. I didn’t even have a coaching certificate (required in England).” But Tony listened and enrolled in a very difficult coaching class (only 5 people out of 50 passed) and he received his coaching license. Next, he took a six-month sabbatical from his job and accepted a coaching position at a camp at Philadelphia. While there, he started playing soccer with a touring All-Star team. “One of the ORU tennis coaches was working at this same camp that summer. He saw me play and called the soccer coach at ORU. The coach, sight unseen offered me a half scholarship, enough for the first semester. I didn’t even know where Tulsa was. I wanted to go, but I would have to have a visa. So, a buddy of mine and I went to Canada because you could typically get one in only three days

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there. Both of our applications were exactly the same, but his was passed and mine was denied. I almost left, but my friends told me that this is just not right and encouraged me to go question it. It made me uncomfortable. English people don’t really do things like that. But I did and the officials agreed. I was soon on a bus heading to Tulsa,” Tony explained. Tony loved ORU and was an immediate star on the ORU soccer team. He was named captain three of the four years and set a record for playing more games than any ORU soccer player every has. He loved the school, especially after meeting a beautiful co-ed named Codi. He says she caught his eye one day as she walked into his life wearing a pair of thigh-high purple boots. The couple dated the last two years of school and were eventually married. When Tony graduated, he was recruited to work at the Mabee Center as an event coordinator. He loved it and the job suited him. He worked for Dave Elsworth, a guy who would become a strong mentor in Tony’s life and someone Tony describes as “the most selfless man I have ever known.” Dave was warm and giving and set a standard Tony continues to strive for today. “I have never seen anyone pour more of themselves into the school,” he said.

Adapting the Mabee Center to a Changing Local Economy Throughout its 40 years, the Mabee Center has hosted a long list of world-class superstars. In fact, the center’s eMuseum which can be seen at www.mabeecenter.com provides a detailed history of these glory days of the facility. Even an abbreviated list of the names will impress you…Tom Jones, Sonny & Cher, Oliva Newton John, Neil Diamond, Kenny Rogers, Natalie Cole, Johnny Mathis, Johnny

The Winters family on vacation in Williamsburg. From left to right: Tony, Larkin, Ciaran, Codi, Mara and Aidan

Cash, John Denver, The Bee Gees, Elvis Presley, Anne Murray, Barry Manilow, Amy Grant, Alabama, The Beach Boys, The Judds, James Taylor, Lionel Richie, Hall and Oats, Harlem Globetrotters, The Oak Ridge Boys, Randy Travis, Roy Clark, Tina Turner, Wayne Newton, Andy Williams, Audio Adrenaline, Conway Twitty, DC Talk, Frank Sinatra, Garth Brooks, Kenny G, Mandy Patinkin, Merle Haggard, Newsboys, Stephen Curtis Chapman, Vince Gill, Jay Leno, Kelly Clarkson, Loretta Lynn, Chuck Berry, Michael W. Smith, Reba McEntire, Sesame Street, Skillet, Tony Bennett, Willie Nelson, Andy Andrews, Condoleezza Rice, Kris Kristofferson, Veggie Tales and MercyMe. However, things changed. Tony explained that the height requirements of most of the shows grew from 44 feet to nearly 80 feet. As this happened and when the larger BOK Center was built, it got harder for the Mabee Center to attract the top acts any more. Next, the casinos started bringing in the small country, pop and rock shows. So the Mabee Center was forced to re-invent itself. Tony began to specialize on bringing in Christian entertainment, speakers, and family and children shows. They also courted church events, business meetings and weddings. It worked. The Mabee Center was able to build its own audience, carving out a niche in the marketplace. Tony believes this gives them the opportunity to make a positive impact on the community. “In fact,” he says, “many of the wholesome family shows, Christian acts and speakers we bring to town would not be available without the Mabee Center. In bringing such acts to town, he believes the Mabee Center truly makes a difference in people’s lives. “I am not going to bring in something my own kids couldn’t go to. If the show is even the slightest bit offensive, I won’t bring them. God has blessed us for that commitment. When you do the right thing, He will bless you with something else. It always happens.” Sometimes Christian and family shows aren’t the big moneymakers, but for Tony and for ORU, it is not about the money. “I love the fact that we can help the university. I love the fact that maybe the money we bring in helps more mission trips to go out next year or helps the really poor kid who can’t afford school,

but who is a fantastic kid to come to school here. Those are the rewards for me.” Tony and the staff at the Mabee Center have developed a reputation for integrity and excellent service. “We always try to show our clients the difference between a Christian organization and a secular one. They feel it in the way we take their event and try to make it as successful. We go the extra mile to make it easier for them.” An example of the facility’s commitment to the community is the show “To Write Love on Her Arms.” Tony explained that he was unsure about the show which was designed to help women with the problem of cutting themselves. He couldn’t see the need until he went home for lunch. His wife had a neighbor over and while he told them about the show, the woman’s face went pale. She told him that her daughter had had the problem and was saved by the show. Tony went back to work and immediately booked the event. “It didn’t make money, but I believe God was speaking to me that day. As the show played before only a few hundred people, I stood on the side of the stage praying that someone in the audience would be helped with whatever they were going through. I think that is why I am in the position I am in. God wants me to try to make the Tulsa community a better place.” Whenever Tony is not at work, you can just about count on him being on the soccer field. He continues to coach. After serving as the assistant coach at ORU for three years, and being the captain of the Tulsa Roughnecks from 1993-1997, he began coaching competitive teams in the area and has done so for over 20 years. He also coaches over 2000 boys for the Oklahoma State Soccer Association. He and his wife Codi have four children. They are a “soccer family” and his son, Ciaran, has even transferred to a prestigious soccer academy, plays for one of the top teams in the nation and has dreams of playing professionally. The Winters attend The Church of Saint Mary in Tulsa and Tony is one of the few Catholics on campus. But Tony says that working with the amazing Christian men from all denominations has taught him that we all have a lot in common. “We probably agree on 94 percent of everything. We know that Jesus is the Way. We all agree on this, but we allow Satan to use those differences to create chasms between us. The more you are in touch and work with such fantastic people, it just doesn’t matter what their religion is. Larry Patton, deceased owner of Celebrity Attractions was Tony’s closest mentor. “He was Baptist, yet he loved me like a son and I loved him as much as I love my own father,” he said. Ask anyone who has had an event at the Mabee Center and they will quickly tell you that Tony Winters is a World-class guy. Tulsa is blessed to have him here. And as for his accent, it is a delightful reminder that God is truly international. He can even use a soccer kid from Liverpool to make a difference right here in Oklahoma.

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Do What Counts!

Page Cole

Franchise Owner of Visiting Angels

ome are born with the desire to make lots of money. Others seek applause, still others long for power. But Page Cole is one of those very special folks who seem to be pre-wired to serve. Putting other’s needs ahead of his own, his emphasis is continually on teaching, mentoring and equipping. And in his desire to make a difference, he tends to have his hands in many different things at once. Maybe it was his training. He spent the first half of his career serving others in the ministry. He wore many different hats in the church as well. But whether he was leading a bunch of kids as a Youth Minister or watching the finances during his church’s building expansion, he did it with the hopes that others would be blessed. A few years ago, he left full-time church ministry and traded it in for the chance to use his skills serving people outside the church walls. He purchased a Visiting Angels franchise, first mainly in a territory stretching from Bixby to Owasso, but ultimately covering the entire Tulsa metroplex, including Bartlesville. Visiting Angels was the perfect career choice for him. After all, home health is all about helping people in crisis and transition, both right down his alley. Visiting Angels is a national franchise which provides elder care services to families across the United States and Canada. Matching the right home care person to each individual patient, they are able to improve the person’s quality of life without requiring that they move out of their home. “We tend to be the first stop on the bus,” Page explained. “Very

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seldom is the first stop hospice. Instead, typically some traumatic event takes place…the kids move away, dad has a stroke or mom’s Alzheimer’s takes a nosedive. When the family is in crisis, they call us. The first thing we do is tell them that it is going to be okay, and it is. We help them through whatever transition is necessary.” “It is a job custom-made for my past training,” Page thought out loud. Business is good, the job is challenging and it should be enough effort for any two average people. But Page is always in the middle of something else. He serves on the board of an organization called Lead Change Group. Co-authoring a book and holding seminars, he is helping the group “instigate a leadership revolution” by mentoring and training people to do the best for their communities. He also developed an app to help families keep track of their personal information. The free app has thus far had over 20,000 downloads. Continually involved in his community, Page also played a role in establishing “The Owasso Gathering on Main Street,” a huge, city-wide effort to unite the city while having fun in the process with bands, booths and games. Attendance often soars above 10,000 people. Page loves feeding into people’s lives, but there are none more deserving than his own wife and kits. “The older I get, the more I am convinced that my key responsibility is to pour into the lives of my wife and children. I relish the moments just to sit, talk and mentor them. Meeting lots of families has made him realize the most important

part of legacy and he desires to be like the happiest families he works with. “My biggest legacy hope is that my kids will love each other, that their kids will all become believers, that their kids will give back to their communities, that they will raise good kids of their own and that they will continually look for ways to share and be the love of Christ. “I want my life to be marked as someone who helped people understand the huge things God can use them to do in this world and the role they can play in the Kingdom to making our existence better. We are all made and designed for an intimate relationship with Jesus and are all a part of this amazing scheme of things that God has done. While I am here, I want to make this a good place, a great place. So, I encourage everyone I meet to dream big and go after those dreams, especially if those dreams can help other people. One of his favorite charities is the Tulsa Alzheimer’s Association. But as you would expect, he did more than simply make a donation. This March, Page and his wife, Rhonda, gathered sponsors and set out to walk Highway 66 from Tulsa to El Reno, a distance of 144 miles. They accomplished this trek, much of the route in the cold rain, in only 7 days. In doing so, they collected over $20,000. They are already making plans for another walk next year. One of his latest efforts is to fight back against scammers who are abusing our elderly. To educate and shine the light on this unscrupulous multi-million dollar industry, he has written an 80page e-Book to give away online. The book will be available in late August. Check their website at www.visitingangels/greencountry. com for more information. Grounded in Christ and injected with a double-dose of whatever makes great servants, Page continues to wake up each day wondering how he can help the people he encounters to have more joy, excitement and peace in their life. It is the reason his clients depend upon him and everyone loves him. It is also the reason he is…Someone You Should Know.

AVAILABLE ON AMAZON.COM

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13 ways to save your lover

Save

13 Ways to Leave Your Lover 6. Demonstrate good works. Don’t hide your light under a bushel. Involve him or her your good works. Let them see the love of Christ in the good things you do for others.

7. Be consistent with your faith. Don’t let your guard down. Be disciplined with your prayer life and your Bible study. Being an influence is both a responsibility and a hazard.

8. Be positive and never whine.

aul Simon recorded a song back in the 70s entitled, “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover.” The tune was catchy and people on every corner were soon singing the instant “Top 40 Hit.” It listed 50 quick ways to leave… including “Just dropping off the key, Lee” and “Making a new plan, Stan.” I remember thinking it was pretty cute and Simon was always one of my favorites. So this month we thought we would share our own list of 13 ways…not to “leave” your lover, but rather to “save” him or her. So here goes…

Nobody likes to be around a whiny person. Stay positive and be demonstrate a life worth desiring.

1. Pray for them.

10. Introduce them to Christian friends.

The Bible teaches us to “Pray without ceasing.” If you love them, put them on the top of your continued prayers.

2. Forgive and be patient with them. Neither of you are perfect. But chances are, he or she may have some habits which are outside the norm of your Christian culture. Unless it is a deal-breaker for you or is illegal or unethical, overlook the little stuff and try to be patient with them. You are not their mom. So don’t nag. Instead, focus on the things you love about them and let God sort out the bad habits in His own time. As they say, “Major on the major things. Leave the rest to God.”

3. Serve them. We are put on this earth to be God’s hands and feet and Jesus continually teaches us to serve others. Make doing good things for them part of your love language.

4. Put their needs above your own Grown up love means being willing to forgo your own wants to make room for serving others. Be willing to do so without keeping score or collecting any bitter feelings.

5. Encourage them. Compliment them about the things you love most about them. We all need positive re-enforcement and the things others compliment are the things we typically do more and more often.

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9. Learn to be an effective listener. Make a point to listen much more than you speak. Be engaged in what he or she is saying. Ask follow-up questions. Show them you care about how they feel and that nothing is as important to you as what they are saying. And yes, that means putting away the cell phone and turning off the television!

If bad company corrupts good morals, then good company must… you got it…encourage good morals. Pick your friends wisely. Pick your lover’s friends even more wisely.

11. Enjoy positive, wholesome entertainment. Philippians 4:8 tells it all. “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things.” Like a good diet, if you want to be spiritually healthy, only take in things which are spiritually good for you.

12. Invite them to church Don’t be pushy, just let them know how much you love to go to church. Let them know it would be even better if they were there with you. Then be sensitive to their feelings and avoid things which you know will make them feel uncomfortable. Take things slowly if necessary.

13. Once you have made an absolute habit of doing all of that, tell them about Jesus.

tulsa dream center

Come Play Golf for the Tulsa Dream Center

Monday, October 6th Tulsa Country Club

ou probably don’t need an excuse to play golf, but if you do, here is one of the best! You can have a great day, playing with incredible folks, and raise money for a tremendous cause at the same time. It’s time for the 7th Annual Tulsa Dream Center Community Golf Classic. Held at the Tulsa Country Club, this tournament has gained the reputation for being one of the best run, best attended fundraising competitions in the area. And the funds feed directly into taking care of Tulsans. The Tulsa Dream Center has been doing so for over 14 years. Located in what was once thought of as the toughest, gang-ridden area in North Tulsa, the Dream Center has made substantial gains in helping to turn it around. By investing in people from miles around they impact the community every day with food, clothing, education, legal assistance and medical attention. And as they extend the hand of Jesus, they saves souls as well as lives. I know I take the risk of being accused of being melodramatic, but these statements are true. I have met the people, heard their stories and seen the results. God uses this place to make a difference every single day of the year. If you have ever been at the end of your rope, ever been truly hungry, ever absolutely longed for a friend to talk to, or ever felt totally and completely alone, maybe you can understand the needs of some of the folks who file into the Tulsa Dream Center. Their needs are met here without condemnation or ridicule. Following in the example of the center’s founder, Pastor Billy Joe Daugherty, along with every meal, every article of clothing and every bag of groceries, each person who walks through the doors is offered a heaping portion of love, acceptance and forgiveness. The result? Crime rates are down, people can walk the streets without fear and lives have been touched. “Pastor Wendell” Hope has been here since the beginning. He says the difference can especially be seen in the way everyone respects the place. “They know we are here to help,” he says. The Tulsa Dream Center is a ministry of Victory Christian Center. However, it has grown way past any church labels. People, churches and organizations of all creeds and backgrounds come to help. “Love and compassion trump doctrine,” one volunteer said. Your golf day will help them to continue to grow, allowing them to help even more people. One example is their summer education program and after-school program for the kids. The program supplies breakfast, classroom academics and even field trips to

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places like the Aquarium, bowling and the State Capitol Building. Certified teachers work with the kids all summer using a state-ofthe-art new computer program called iReady. Focusing on reading and math, they were able to help the kids jump at least a grade level. “The expansion also allowed us to add classrooms upstairs, expand our warehouse, build a chapel and a game room, and expand the lobby, the medical clinic and the dining room facilities. This has made a huge difference in the programs and services that we are able to provide,” explained Pastor Wendell. Pastor Wendell explained that of course they could always use more help. People are invited to help either financially or as a volunteer. He tells a story about one Christmas when he didn’t think they would have enough toys for the kids. He remembers that he finally just gave the problem to God. “I saw the need was so great and we didn’t have enough. But then, it just settled in my spirit, this is God’s. I learned then that God always provides. We even had some left over we were able to donate to other organizations.” So, here it is, time for the annual Golf Tournament to raise money for the Dream Center. We asked Pastor Wendell, “Assuming the tournament brings in more money than you could hardly believe, what will you do with it?” “It’s already spent,” he said with a laugh. With an expectation that the money will absolutely come, he said, “We will spend it on the kids because the needs are so great.”

A Special Invitation … I would like to invite you to be a part of this year’s community golf classic. This is the 14th year the Dream Center has been reaching out in the community with healing, help, and hope. The number of clients continues to increase, and in order to offer more services and programs to meet the growing needs, God has provided and continues to provide the necessary resources to meet every need. Your investment will continue to help us provide clothing, food, medical and legal assistance, and educational help and so much more. Again, thank you for helping us make a difference in our community. I look forward to seeing you on Monday, October 6th. Invite a friend to join you. Sincerely, Wendell Hope Executive Director

You Can Help! Sign up for the tournament – It’s the best day of golf you will find, complete with lunch, cart and a wonderful buffet dinner for only $250. Not a golfer? Think about being a sponsor! Mail entries to Wendell Hope, Tulsa Dream Center Community Golf Classic, 200 West 46th Street North, Tulsa, OK 74126 or register online at tulsadreamcenter.org.

Tournament Schedule Check-in 11:00 a.m. (Coffee and juice available) Warm up 11:30-11:45 a.m. Go to carts 11:45 a.m. (box lunch provided on carts) Shotgun Start 12:00 p.m. Buffet Dinner Immediately Afterwards

Sponsorship Entry Individual $250 • 18 holes of golf for one player • Commemorative photo Tee Box $500 • 18 holes of golf for one player • Tee box sign on the course • Commemorative photo Bronze $1000 • 18 holes of golf for 2 players • Name recognition on the event sponsor banner • Commemorative photo Silver $2,500 • 18 holes of golf for 4 players • 2′ x 6′ sponsor banner (company logo) • Commemorative photo Gold $5,000 • 18 holes of golf for 8 players • 2′ x 6′ sponsor banner (company logo) • Commemorative photo Platinum $10,000 • 18 hole of golf for 12 players • Name & Corporation logo on all promotional materials • Local media recognition • Commemorative photo 7th Annual Tulsa Dream Center Community Golf Classic Monday, October 6th Tulsa Country Club 701 N. Union Ave.

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victory christian school

Back To School Shopping by. dennis demuth, PH.D. Victory Christian School, Tulsa, OK

This article is written out of a genuine concern for Christian parents and their fulfillment of the great command in Deuteronomy 6:6‑7, regarding teaching and training children.

And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. (NKJ) NAME BRANDS ATTRACT ATTENTION Every year, all across the continent, children return to school after lengthy summer vacations. Parents scurry off to the shopping centers looking over the quality brands of shirts and skirts, belts and boots. Each store has its sales staff poised, eagerly awaiting the opportunity to tell them their store will meet all the children’s back‑to‑school needs. They show and talk about the quality brands parents know, many exclusives like Polo, Guess, Dockers, Outback Red, Liz Claiborne and Cole Haan. They very tactfully encourage parents to “buy it all” in their one‑stop children’s department store ‑ and parents do just that! Whether or not parents make the right choices becomes known only as the school days pass and the quality of the items purchased then becomes very evident.

SHOPPING IS MORE SERIOUS THAN YOU THINK There is yet another back‑to‑school shopping taking place from coast to coast. This shopping is more serious than the one for school clothes and supplies. An increasing number of Christian parents are out looking for a school. Their primary reason in combing the market is a growing dissatisfaction with the education their children are receiving and the increasing desire to fulfill God’s command to “train and teach their children in the way they should go.” There are hundreds of department stores providing back‑to‑school clothing and supplies; however, only two basic choices are available for parents looking for a school. One choice is progressive education. The other is Christian education. Which of these two schools will you choose?

PRODUCTS OFFERED BY VICTORY CHRISTIAN SCHOOL Selecting Victory Christian school will expose your children to a basic school philosophy that says: We believe in God. Knowledge acquired while in Victory has its roots in the Bible, the ultimate

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standard of truth. The fear of the Lord is the basis of knowledge. Education at Victory Christian School is designed to teach and train students to see things as God sees them. History is taught as purposeful and seen as the working of God’s divine timetable for man. In science, reference is made to the Creator of the creation. The foundation for science begins with God creating the heavens and the earth, followed by the creation of man in His own image and breathing in his nostrils the breath of life. In literature, Victory teachers evaluate man’s writings by Biblical standards. In music and art, Victory teachers uphold a wholesome expression consistent with Scripture. In math, Victory teachers show reality as having structure and order ‑ the creation of a rational, orderly God. In health and hygiene, Victory teachers point to man as God’s creation – “fearfully and wonderfully made.” Finally, in social studies, Victory teachers help students understand God’s view of world cultures, governments and problems. They learn that all races have sprung from one common genealogy, Adam. Parents need to understand what is being communicated when a school uses textbooks that say nothing about God. By not saying anything about God, a student is left to conclude, “Even if there is a God, He must not be important, or if there is a God, He is no more important than any other god.” Even when textbooks do not say anything about God, Christian teachers who do not teach in a Christian school are prohibited from bringing God into any core subject. Furthermore, the teaching of evolution attempts to destroy the foundation of God’s Word. After all, if students are taught evolution is truth, then the Bible account of creation must be a lie. And if a lie, how can one believe anything in the Bible? Ultimately, students will learn that man’s evolvement leads him to bring glory to himself. History is purposeless. Science is nothing more than the law of nature at work without supernatural intervention. In literature, art, and music, expression of personal and traditional inhibitions and fantasies is an acceptable practice.

SYSTEMS IN CONTRAST Selecting Victory Christian School for the education for your sons and daughters allows them to be taught from an authoritative viewpoint that says right is right and wrong is wrong; there are God‑given absolutes that guide all thinking and behavior. Furthermore, obeying their parents is the right thing for them to do. They learn to respect authority; a man’s word is his bond; a job worth doing is worth doing well. The expectation is to maintain high standards morally, behaviorally and academically. For them, cheating is stealing. They learn about traditional family values and that God’s plan for marriage is between one man and one women and that homosexual and lesbian life styles are unacceptable. Students at Victory will learn that responsibility is more important than rights.

STRONG DISCIPLINE IS IMPORTANT Children attending Victory Christian school find out the very first day of school that teachers believe in discipline, for discipline is scriptural; teachers expect students to follow classroom rules. Students learn to refrain from being disrespectful, selfish, irresponsible, demanding, discourteous, irreverent or destructive in their attitudes toward fellow students or teachers. Children refrain from using profanity, offensive slang, vulgarity, envious rivalry and foolish jesting. Accepting all school policies with a positive attitude is important; they find out that discontentment becomes nothing more than a bad habit, a costly attitude robbing them of the pleasure of being a positive student. By the time the school year is over, they understand that self‑discipline requires courage, consistency, conviction, diligence and a genuine enthusiastic effort. Pornography will not be accepted as an expression of art; drugs, drinking and sexual exploration are not acceptable. Students will be told that “sex is not safe” and is reserved for marriage. Values will be based on the uncompromised Word of God and impartation from teachers and parents rather than being determined by the individual for himself or the peer group. They will learn that the killing of a baby through abortion is not an individual’s choice, since a “fetus” is really a human being before it is born. Students at Victory will be taught moral absolutes; teachers will stress cultivation of habits of orderliness, carefulness, alertness, persistence, accomplishment, faithfulness, decisiveness, effort, steadfastness, endurance, patience, loyalty and trust. Students will learn the principles of honesty, decency, cooperation and fair play because these are rules that God has established for the ordering of their lives. With a God‑centered education presented at Victory, students will also have a God‑centered moral point of reference for issues such as sexuality, homosexuality and abortion.

CONSIDER THE EFFECTS OF EDUCATION Just as with the quality of back‑to‑school clothing, the effects of a secular school placement will not be immediately evident. However, in the final analysis, it will be devastating. The Apostle

Paul warns of a spoiling that is taking place: As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him: Rooted and built up in him, and established in the faith, as ye have been taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving. Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments (elementary principles) of the world, and not after Christ (Colossians 2:6‑8). The decaying that is taking place is so gradual that parents may not even notice it until it is too late. No one knowingly would intentionally allow their children to be spoiled by secular humanism, progressive education and new age philosophies. It is only as the child progresses through school that the effects are felt and then, suddenly, parents realize they have been shopping too long at the wrong store. Not only will the quality of education leave much to be desired, but the adverse influences on their sons and daughters will have eroded the foundation their children need for the life that lies ahead.

PARENT, CHURCH AND SCHOOL WORKING TOGETHER Once parents begin to notice the change in their children, they desperately want to transfer them to a Christian school, expecting the Christian school to change them overnight. Although the receiving of a new heart can happen immediately, the renewing of the mind takes longer. However, as parents, church and school work together, these students can be directed toward a God‑centered life. There is no greater investment that parents can make than to invest in a quality Christian education. It will pay dividends from now to eternity. How much better it would be if parents would give their children a traditional Christian education right from the start, beginning in kindergarten and then adding to this foundation each year. When parents select Victory Christian School at an early age, their children will have more than a quality education; they will learn to live in a secular, humanistic world, but not be a part of it. They will learn to evaluate life from a Biblical perspective, to interpret their world from a scriptural vantage point. They will learn to exercise the authority God has given them, to be doers of the Word and not hearers only, and to be able to answer when the Lord says, “Johnny, l want you to be a Christian businessman,” or “Susie, I want you to go to the mission field.” Johnny and Susie will be in a position to say, “Speak, Lord, for I am listening.” It is not too late to do your back‑to‑school shopping. For a quality Christian school consider Victory Christian School. Join us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/pages/Victory-Christian-School

Victory Christian School 7700 South Lewis Avenue Tulsa, OK 74136 (918) 491-7720 www.vcstulsa.org

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rejoice christian school

Rejoice Christian Schools Prepares For New Campus, School Year

s parents are packing backpacks and lunchboxes, one Tulsa area Christian school is preparing for the start of a new school year while planning for its $50 million future. This fall, Rejoice Christian Schools in Owasso is excited for the construction to begin on its new campus. Everyone at Rejoice Christian Schools is grateful for the blessings God has bestowed to the school. During spring 2014, Rejoice Christian Schools received a generous donation for the construction of its state-of-art campus, which will feature a high school, middle school and a combined preschool and elementary building. “We are proud to announce that the Eddy Gibbs Family Trust has committed sufficient funding to build an entire firstclass campus for Rejoice Christian School K-3 through K-12,” according to a press release. “This funding includes provision for land acquisition, architecture and engineering, buildings, class rooms and athletic facilities. The Performing Arts Center will be provided by others. The level of funding from the Gibbs Family Trust will result in the creation of a total school facility, that, when completed, will be debt-free. Further contributions will still be required for an endowment, operating expenses and furnishings.”

With the new campus expansion, Rejoice Christian Schools is excited to experience increased enrollment. “We plan to grow from 750 students to more than 1,500 students,” said Dr. Craig Shaw, Rejoice Christian Schools’ Superintendent. “We are seeking an endowment fund to provide more need-based scholarships for students. The larger campus and endowment fund resources will enable us to provide extended services, such as academic help for students and gifted and talented programs.” As teachers and administrators plan for the start of the 2014-15 school year, Rejoice Christian Schools is grateful for its continued blessings from God.

REJOICE CHRISTIAN SCHOOLS School Director: Dr. Craig Shaw 13413 E. 106th St. North; Owasso, OK Phone: 918-272-7235 Website: www.rejoiceschool.com Email: rcs@rejoiceschool.com Grades offered: Pre3 - 12th grade Accreditation: Association of Christian Schools International (ACSI); Oklahoma Private Schools Accreditation Commission (OPSAC) The right school will change a child’s future. At Rejoice Christian Schools (RCS), our experienced faculty provides for your child’s best future through Christian nurturing, educational challenges, and small class sizes. Year after year, RCS continues to rank in the national academic top 10% of all schools, both public and private. Our God-given ministry is to lead young people to know Christ and train them in Biblical principles, Christian character, language and traditional subject matter. RCS offers a compete curriculum from Pre3 - 12th grade, including college preparatory and honors classes, a vibrant arts program and a dynamic sports program.

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Call today for a personal tour at:

918-272-7235

(Preschool / Elementary)

918-516-0050

(Middle / High School) Rejoice Christian Schools admits students of any race, color, national and ethnic origin to all the rights, privileges, programs, and activities generally accorded or made available to students at the school. It does not discriminate on the basis of race, color, national and ethnic origin in administration of its educational policies, admissions policies, scholarship and loan programs, and athletic and other school-administered programs.

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act financial

RANDY COWELL

Social InSecurity Part 1

hen the subject of Social Security comes up in my planning sessions, I am reminded of the song my children would sing in Sunday School. “Deep and wide, deep and wide there’s a fountain flowing deep and wide.” ………. I know it doesn’t have the same effect without the hand gestures, but the analogy of a social program that will be forever flowing and endless may not be possible with 10,000 baby boomers reaching 65 every day. The subject of Social Security is not only a deep subject, but it is a wide and complicated one. This is the first part of a two-part article that will attempt to boil down, into simple terms, the important decisions that you need to make as you prepare for retirement. To understand the problems facing Social Security one must first go back in time to the beginning. This seventy-five year old program was enacted by Congress in 1935 as part of FDR’s “New Deal” to help senior citizens escape poverty in their old age. The intent was to be a safety net for the elderly shortly after the Great Depression. In 1940 the likelihood of a woman making it to 65 was just 60.6%, and if you were a man, the chance you would make it to 65 years of age was barely over 50%. The life expectancy in 1935 was 58 for a man and 62 for a woman. I’m sure FDR and the designers of Social Security did not anticipate that the likelihood of getting to age 65 and collecting benefits would be 73% for a man and 83.6% for a woman. To compound the problem the average remaining life expectancy for those making it to Social Security age has increased from 12.7/14.7 male/female to 15.3/19.6 years respectively. That may not seem like much but it represents as much as a 33% increase in the amount of time benefits will be paid. Another factoid complicating the projections of eminent Social Security default is the fact that more women have entered the workforce and are now eligible for benefits. In 1940 women made up 24.4% of the labor force by the year 2000 that number had almost doubled to 47%.

The Future of Social Security Fast-forward to today and you have a social experiment seeming out of control. It now provides benefits to over 50 million people and is financed from payroll taxes from over 150 million workers. Once designed for the elderly, it now includes disability and minor dependent benefits. The 24-dollar question that every concerned baby boomer is asking is “Will Social Security be there for me?”. A recent announcement by the Social Security actuaries that the Social Security Trust Fund will run out of money by 2034, supports their fear. If you remember the famous Bill Clinton quote “It depends on what the definition of is is”, you might understand the next statement. The answer to the question “Will Social Security be there?” will depend on what the new definition of “be there” is. Going forward there will be changes. Will the current benefit amounts be there? Will I be able to claim at the current age? Will it include disability and all the spousal and dependent benefits? The

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only hard fast numerical to be discussed is that those 55 or over will not see any changes. Time will tell.

This should make you angry Usually I am a “Glass half-full” kind of guy and make no mistake about it, I LOVE MY COUNTY, but when I uncover information such as this I have to admit I am not so positive. Like you, I work hard and the thought of my hard earned tax dollars being wasted makes me angry. According to a June 2012 audit by the Inspector General for the Social Security Administration, 2,475 beneficiaries had a recorded date of death in the Social Security’s database but were still receiving benefits. According to the IG at least 1,546 had received benefits totaling $30,956,695. Some had received the benefit for up to 20 years. Call your congressman and ask, “Why?”

The next step For anyone serious about planning his or her retirement, a thorough understanding of the Social Security system is vital to maximizing their retirement income. How the various choices will affect your overall income and benefit those you love is vitally important! Work with an advisor that you trust and who demonstrates a complete understanding of your situation and how it fits into this important social program. You have worked a lifetime for it! Next month we will address the important factors you will need to know and strategies on how to maximize your benefits. For more information on how your particular situation will be affected by Social Security and planning strategies you can use, please contact our office. We would love to help you. A special thanks to Jordan Woodall and Will Baxter for their research assistance for this article. RANDY C. COWELL, M.S., LUTCF, CFP®, CRPC® ACT FINANCIAL Randy C. Cowell is a columnist and President of ACT Financial Services, Inc. in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He is the author of “God GoodDebt Bad”. Randy welcomes your thoughts and prayers. He can be reached at 918-664-0081 or by e-mail at rcowell@htk.com.

The “Yes Women Can” Blog

WATCH FOR THIS BLOG IN EACH ISSUE OF COMMUNITY SPIRIT

IBYAm a Grown Woman LISA GOINS

am a grown woman, I can do this…it’s the special phrase, whether spoken out loud or just my inner voice, that gets me through most all of my difficult situations. It’s not always about the obvious things such as speaking in public, phone calls from an upset teacher or trying on swimsuits with a 3-way mirror…. Each day there is especially something that happens in my life that requires me to use my special phrase… “I am a grown woman, I can do this”... it’s dinner. There’s just something about dinner. I’m not sure if it’s that I have to feed four kids or if it’s the pressure of figuring out what to fix…again, but I often find myself thinking “why do they want dinner every single night?!!” Regardless of the reason, 5:00 p.m. rolls around and I find myself using my special phrase, “I am a grown woman, I can do this.” It is, after all, just dinner. My problem is that I’m not so confident in the kitchen. I never professed to be any good at cooking and I remind my family that I have promised they will be fed and full. I never said anything about it tasting great. My claim to fame is meals on a stick. These conveniently can include breakfast, lunch and dinner; meals such as pancake on a stick, corndogs on a stick, chicken on a stick…you get the idea. My issue is that I have to keep from burning food… and those sticks; first for the picky eaters who won’t eat the burnt food on the burnt sticks and secondly, to keep from setting off the chain of events that happen with burned food on burnt sticks. Things such as spraying air freshener to hide the smell only to find out you have doused your kitchen in Pam cooking spray (which happened to be on the counter next to the air freshener, as both are needed in my kitchen!) It was unfortunate that I had just called the kids to lunch while continuing to spray because in my house, it was always a race to the table…. As if one of the kids were going to get the better meal on a stick? Not sure, but it was quite the slippery kitchen that day. Whether its cooking, family pressures, or just one of the many difficult things you find yourself facing in this life, remind yourself that the Word of God says “I can do all things through Christ who is my strength.” I know for me, I would not survive being a grown woman without knowing where my strength comes from! It’s nearly 5:00 p.m. and as I’m sitting here at my desk, I’ve got a phone call on hold and the text messages start rolling in… “Hey

mom what’s for dinner?” I’m not sure if my four kids realize that they each separately text me around this time of day to inquire (probably making sure I am not serving them something on a stick), … and then my phone comes to life… “Hideaway Pizza, thank you for waiting. How may I help you?” And I think to myself… I am a grown woman and I’ve got this… CALL Cindy Steward AT 918-809-5805 OR Lisa Goins AT 918-289-3919 VISIT US AT www.privatelabelrealty.com

LISA GOINS & CINDY STEWARD Smart Women Buy Homes are professional Realtors who have a passion and commitment to serving the unique needs of women home buyers. Lisa and Cindy are dedicated to making it easy, exciting and a joy for you to buy and own a home!

LISA GOINS

As a residential sales specialist Lisa quickly became a multi-million dollar producer by helping her clients either find the perfect home to purchase or successfully sell their existing home. She has a passion for Smart Women Buy Homes and the ability to help women fulfill their dream of home ownership. Lisa is a Realtor and Managing Broker for Private Label Realty, married and mom to 4 great kids; she and her husband Kelly also serve a Senior Pastors of Faith Assembly in Tulsa.

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oklahoma health department

Will Your Baby Be Tomorrow’s Smoker?

t seems crazy doesn’t it? Can you possibly imagine your cute, baby-powered bundle of joy someday sucking down pack after pack of cigarettes? But the reality is that for today’s tobacco companies to survive, they must convince your baby and millions of others that smoking is still cool. It is a battle they feel they must win and if history is any indication, it will be an easy sale, no matter the deadly consequences.

Consider the latest statistics… •

• •

•

Nearly 20 percent (18.1%) of today’s high school boys have smoked in the last month. Over sixteen percent of girls fall into the same circle. Every day, some 3500 kids will light up for the first time and nearly a 1000 of them will continue the habit. Kids will consume 800 million packs of cigarettes this year, producing roughly $2.0 billion per year in sales revenue for the tobacco companies. For some kids, 12.8 percent of males and 2.2 percent of females smokeless tobacco is the attraction.

Other kids, over 50 percent of children between 3-19, smoke without meaning to, as they are exposed to secondhand smoke. All of this happens in a society where adults seem to be slowly having their own health concerns with smoking. Adult rates are “down” to 19 percent nationally [Men: 21.6% Women: 16.5%] and over 75 percent of workplaces now have smoke-free policies.

The Power of Advertising Your baby is or will be hit by a barrage of advertising. In fact, the tobacco industry currently is spending 8.5 billion annually or $23+ million each and every day. And research studies have found that kids are three times as sensitive to tobacco advertising than adults and are more likely to be influenced to smoke by cigarette marketing than by peer pressure. Experts estimate that a third of underage experimentation with smoking is directly attributable to tobacco company advertising and promotion. It is a battle the politicians have proven not to want to fight and it is obvious why. The tobacco industry contributes over 2 billion dollars per year to federal candidates, political parties and PACS. And, in 2010 alone, they invested 16.6 million in lobbying Congress. Tobacco companies also spend enormous amounts to influence state and local politics; and, when threatened by the federal McCain tobacco control bill in 1998, they spent more than $125 million in direct and grassroots lobbying to defeat it. Since 1998,

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Altria (Philip Morris) has spent more on lobbying Congress than almost any other business.

Our rates, right here in conservative Oklahoma, are shocking… High school students who smoke: 17.9% (37,200) Male high school students who use smokeless or spit tobacco 1 8 . 4 % (females use in high school students who smoke 17.9% (37,200) Male high school students who use smokeless or spit tobacco 18.4% (females use much lower) Kids (under 18) who become new daily smokers each year 4,400 Kids exposed to secondhand smoke at home 216,000 Packs of cigarettes bought or smoked by kids each year 9.4 million Adults in Oklahoma who smoke 26.1% (745,200) Kids (under 18) who become new daily smokers each year 4,400 Kids exposed to secondhand smoke at home 216,000 Packs of cigarettes bought or smoked by kids each year 9.4 million Adults in Oklahoma who smoke

Tobacco Industry Influence in Oklahoma Annual tobacco industry marketing expenditures nationwide $8.5 billion Estimated portion spent for Oklahoma marketing each year $160.3 million So, how will you protect your child? How will you convince him or her not to believe the ads? Here is a place to gather some information. Begin now to teach your son or daughter the truth. There is nothing cool about smoking.

Helpful websites: www.tobaccofreekids.org www.okswat.com Or, for more information, call Nedal Nofal, CX Tobacco Prevention & Control Coordinator/SWAT at the Tulsa Health Department, at (918) 595-4551 or email him at nnofal@tulsa-health.org. ALL STATISTICS COURTESY OF THE TULSA HEALTH DEPARTMENT, TULSA-HEALTH.ORG

the heart of the matter

DENIECE ADSIT

What Do You See?

orking in the downtown area of the city, I frequently walk around at lunchtime. On most days, I barely walk three blocks from my office before I’m approached by a panhandler begging for money. One day across the street from my office I was chased by a would-be mugger. As a result of this environment, I have become very aware of my surroundings and do a pretty good job of “reading” people from a distance and taking evasive action. Looking out of the office window one day, I noticed a man walking slowly up and down the parking lot of a neighboring office building. He was rather large and walked slowly, almost exuding an aura of depression. I watched as cars pulled up in the lot. He would slowly approach them then slowly walk away toward the next person or car passing through the lot. He finally walked to an area where I could no longer see him, so I went back to work. A short time later I looked out the window again. He was back! Again he was walking slowly up and down the parking lot, occasionally moving toward a car that just pulled into the lot, or someone who was walking across the lot; then slowly he walked away. I decided to report him to our security staff and see if they could contact the neighboring business and make their security aware of the issue. I made a mental note of his appearance so I could describe him to security. He was wearing a gold shirt, dark slacks, and he was a bit overweight and tall. It was a little odd for a panhandler to wear a shirt so bright, but it must

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be something they gave him at the homeless shelter down the street. I went back to the window for another look, and he was gone again. So I went to lunch (my walk). As I cut through the building next door, I passed a man who was dressed exactly like the guy in the parking lot. It wasn’t him. This man was shorter and thinner, shirt was tucked in neatly, definitely not the same man. Then I noticed what I could not have possibly seen from the office window…his shirt was embossed with the logo of the parking lot. He was a parking attendant! Why didn’t I think of that, instead of immediately assuming he was a panhandler (or worse, a mugger)? Because my experiences had translated his behavior, and those experiences had shown this type of actions to belong to muggers and panhandlers, it did not register that they could be manifestations of something totally different. That is one very good reason for me to withhold judgment and let God be the one who judges. No matter how impartial I try to be, my responses will ALWAYS be a product of my life’s experiences. Matthew 7:1-2 says “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Which brings me back to the parking lot attendant… I wonder how he would judge me if he saw me out walking. It just might look something like this: “See that woman over there, walking very quickly, and constantly looking over her shoulder. She probably just skipped out on paying for her parking.” So he spends the next hour combing the parking lot for the illusive car with no parking pass.

ABOUT DENIECE Deniece has a passion to minister to women. You are going to grow to love her and the way she tells stories, always getting to the real heart of the matter.

unite my city W I T H

MOLLIE MYERS

Serve My City, 2nd Annual Community Day Set for September 20 with a careful eye on how that interaction can lead to deeper relationships with each other and into the surrounding community. September 20th will again be a day where the city will see the Church at work – together -- as congregations join forces to reach into to their community.

ore and more local churches in the Tulsa area are beginning to work together in order to bring lasting and transformational change to our city. Here are a few things that are taking place. A growing number of churches are working together to bring an after school program to up to 100 junior high students living in the P61 (Peoria and 61st) area, after a successful pilot this past spring semester. In addition, the P61 area churches are working with the city’s local Task Force to invite families to be involved in the second annual community service day on September 20, 2014 at Johnson Park on Riverside. This event will feature education, entertainment, resourcing from agencies, and outright fun as neighbors come together for a show-stopping block party. Included in the day will be several service projects geared at providing ways for neighbors to work together for the good of their community, as well as provide a chance to get to know one another. While successful events are not the end goal of the Community Day, they are able to facilitate the building of relationships, and bring church and community together. The city wide day of service is also being planned in three other sectors of the city including the communities around: 21st & Garnett, 3rd & Utica, and 21st & Southwest Boulevard. Local churches in these areas of the city are meeting together to collaborate on the best way to engage and interact with their community during a day focused on serving and connecting, but

The Unite My City movement continues to stir in the heart of Tulsa’s Christian Church community and keeping the bond of peace through the spirit of unity looks very promising. All churches are invited, welcome, and encouraged to participate in the annual Serve My City day or the P61 After School Program. For more information on your church’s involvement, please email mollie@worldcompassion.tv. Updated information will also be available on the UMC website at unitemycity.tv as plans develop further.

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Tulsa . 81st & Lewis . 918-935-2731

thevintagepearl.com 28â&#x20AC;&#x201A; |

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lose your quit B Y

DANNY CAHILL

Focus on the W!

Community Spirit is excited to have Danny Cahill as one of our featured, monthly writers. Whether you wrestle with your weight or not, you will enjoy Danny’s motivating column. We all cheered Danny on when he was on The Biggest Loser. Now, he continues to gain our applause while he shares his testimony with others. Danny loves the Lord and is not shy about telling people about Him. It is a blessing to the magazine to have his monthly article. Be sure to watch for Danny’s article each month.

oo many times in life, people focus on the HOW to get things done. Throughout the bible, you see people questioning God about HOW they were going to accomplish something. Moses made excuses because of the HOW. In Exodus 3 & 4, Moses focused on his shortcomings and the extremity of the situation. He could not fathom HOW he could go to Egypt and set the people free. He was focused on the wrong thing. The next few articles will be focusing on the W’s, not the HOW! Yes, WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE, WHY. A friend of mine once told me, ‘When the intent becomes clear, the mechanism (how) appears!” Until you decide to do something, and the decision to do something is bigger than the reasons not to do something, the HOW will stop you in your tracks! Today, I start with an important question: What is your WHY? During a recent SLI Bootcamp, I asked a trainee, “What is your WHY?” He didn’t know what I was talking about! When I was 460 pounds, the reasons NOT to lose weight outweighed the reasons TO lose weight. I was stuck! What was the benefit I got from being 460 pounds you ask? Well, I got to eat anything I wanted! I never had to sweat and work hard! I got to take it easy and relax. Then one day, everything changed. My daughter walked in and said, “Daddy, you are my hero!” I felt great!

Then she said. “I want to be just like you when I grown up! I want a belly just like yours.” I was mortified! How could I sit on the couch eating food when my daughter’s very life was at stake! Not just mine, but my entire family! That was an awakening! That was the day I found my WHY! I was angry! Yes, ANGRY! Anger is a God given emotion! It isn’t bad. What you do with it is what counts! Rage is a bad way to handle anger. Motivation is a great way to handle it! I looked at myself in the mirror and said, “What is wrong with you! If she wanted to be like you, then you had better be what you want her to be!” I then saw the type of role model I was being to my family. Everything changed. Did I immediately lose the weight? Nope. But I did begin the long process of dealing with my issues and finding my journey to lose weight! It could have been anything, but it was The Biggest Loser. What is your WHY? What has God called you to be, and what excuses are you making to not be it? With Moses, he was a sheep herder, not of eloquent speech, and they surely wouldn’t believe him! He was focused on HOW he was going to set them free. Not on WHO God had created him to be, and most of all, his WHY! Step one: WHAT IS YOUR WHY?

Simply Lose It Bootcamp is run by Danny Cahill. You can get information about signing up by emailing him at Danny@ TheDannyCahill.com. When: Monday – Thursday & Saturday (Generally 5 weekly sessions) Cost: $99 per month for up to 3 weekly sessions, or $119 for unlimited Where: Fitness Together 97th & Riverside, Fitness Together Downtown Tulsa, Outside at several different Broken Arrow, Tulsa, and Bixby parks. Info: Email Danny@TheDannyCahill.com

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marriages that last

BY DR. KEVIN NIEMAN

It All Starts Somewhere, Part 2

n last month’s issue (Community Spirit July 2014), we explored why couples may feel they have a hundred different issues but in reality, they continue to struggle with just one. We pointed out how we tend to learn coping behaviors at a very early age and though they may have been once useful and productive, they have now turned into conflictual dysfunctional interactions hindering couples from true oneness. Below you’ll find four boxes, fill in your respective box and then have your spouse fill in theirs. What you’ll notice almost immediately is that your spouse’s coping behaviors serve as triggers in making you feel the way you experience conflict. There are many terms used to describe this dysfunctional pattern but I tend to refer to it as the Pain Cycle. If couples are going to ever break through these hurtful interactions, they’ll have to first do something that many are just too fearful to attempt: look at oneself.

Speak what you’d normally do. For example, “right now I feel unloved and I feel stupid. I would normally respond by getting defensive, lashing out or withdrawing to avoid the conflict.” Once you’ve spoken out loud your normal dysfunctional behaviors it’s very difficult to respond in your typical fashion. It helps force you to take a different path that can reflect your true heart more adequately. Nobody likes their hurtful coping behaviors and when you can see the personal value to change these responses, it has enormous healing potential. Speak the truth. “I feel unloved and stupid. I would normally get defensive and lash out or withdraw to avoid.” But I know my spouse loves me. There are many signs to prove that he/she values me. I also know I’m not stupid. I’m very capable of contributing to this situation.” Speak what you’re going to do differently. “I feel unloved and stupid. I would normally get defensive, lash out and withdraw to avoid. I know I’m loved and I know I’m not stupid. Therefore, I’m not going to get defensive or lash out. I’m going to stay and continue our discussion and not withdraw.” By speaking these phases out loud you’re allowing your spouse to hear your heart and showing them that you’re making a very intentional effort to break your Pain Cycle. Remember, no one has the ability to control your actions or reactions. Focus on self and find new coping behaviors that represent what your heart is truly trying to communicate to your spouse.

Dr. Kevin Nieman, LMFT Cornerstone Christian Counseling Services

Looking at oneself would seem to be pretty easy; however, in the “heat of the battle”, it’s more difficult than you’d think. Only you can change your coping responses. Your spouse is not responsible for how you choose to act. They may have influence but you still have the ability and responsibility to change your own hurtful responses. One effective way to break this Pain Cycle is to follow four simple steps that would ensure you to take a more productive path. It’s important to speak out loud your answers to the following questions. Hearing yourself say the words out loud forces you to process the new information differently. Basically, when you speak it into the light you’re removing yourself from old dysfunctional patterns and now bringing it into the light to where God can work. Speak of your feelings. Speak your feelings out loud. By saying how you feel, you’re validating yourself by recognizing your own hurt. For example, right now “I feel unloved” or “I’m feeling stupid.”

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Cornerstone Christian Counseling Services is proud to announce that we are now in our newly remodeled offices. We are also pleased to announce that our new website www. cornerstoneoftulsa.com is active. We are excited about bringing hope and healing to those hurting in our community, blending our Christian beliefs with our professionalism.

CORNERSTONE Christian Counseling Services

Let us help you get your life back on track. Call today: 918.392.4008

4930 S. Sheridan Rd.

lose it for the kids

Can He Reach 100 Pounds? Community Spirit Publisher On Target to Lose it for the Kids

hat was thought to be a crazy idea in January, has turned out to be a success story in July. “But it is not over. The toughest part is still ahead,” Tom McCloud says. In January, he agreed to put it all on the line and lose 100 pounds! Why?? For one reason...to raise money for a whole new series of programs, equipping Contact Mission to positively influence the lives of many deserving kids on the Tulsa’s Westside. To tackle the challenge, Tom teamed up with some experts at shedding the pounds. He called in nutritionist expert, Lindsey Nieman from Cornerstone Counseling Center at 51st and Sheridan. She educated him and has acted as his consultant and calorie coach. She taught him not to look at this as a diet, but rather as life change, challenging him to replace the fats and carbs with a protein the size of his palm and healthy vegetables. In the gym, he recruited some of Tulsa’s best. He started working out with Danny Cahill, long time America’s Biggest Loser from the ABC hit TV show, The Biggest Loser. Danny lost 239 pounds in six months during Season 8 of the show. He agreed to let Tom join him in his daily workouts at Fitness Together Downtown and Riverside locations. Together, they have been coached by Fitness Together trainers and overseen by owner Michael Watkins. Tom went to his friends and to the Community Spirit family to

get people to sponsor him for every pound he could lose between January 3rd and October 3rd. His goal was to lose 100 pounds and raise nearly $100,000...ALL of which goes directly to Contact Mission, a registered 501c3.

It is not too late for you to join in the fun for this very worthy cause. So, it is now August. How are things going? Tom is down over 70 pounds and is focused on getting the other 30 off before he gets on the scales one last time at a citywide Community Spirit Presents…Variety Show on October 3rd. Can He Do It?? It is not too late for you to join in the fun for this very worthy cause. Log on to www.LoseItForTheKids.com to read the details and make your pledge. Then, plan on coming to the show and watching him climb on the scales. Contact Mission does a wonderful job and your tax-deductible donation will absolutely change lives. So, give generously! C ommu n ity s p ir itmagazin e.com

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[Neh. 2:18]

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