Anxiety - How to Deal With the Bully

Rick Stordeur, M.S.W., R.S.W. is the Clinical Supervisor at CFLA.

Being able to predict and be aware of danger keeps me safe. If I walk through lion territory, I know to be wary of lions. I have to get it just right, though: too little caution increases danger; excessive worry, however, can paralyze me.

The COVID pandemic put another layer of anxiety on my everyday worries and concerns. It added pressure to be extra careful, to wear a mask, sanitize hands, and keep my distance, and it takes a toll. Below are six methods to help handle the bullying of anxiety.

1. Live more often in “what is” instead of “what could be.” Mindfulness teachings help focus more on the present moment and less on an imagined negative future. Consider signing up for a mindfulness course, meditation, or yoga.

2. When I’m too anxious, I’m out of balance. I think of anxiety as having too much energy coursing through my body. If I can find a way to drain that energy, I will soothe myself. Activities such as writing, painting, talking, crying, puzzles can help.

3. One of the best outlets is aerobic exercise – something that makes me breathe heavily, my heart beat faster, done 20 minutes, three or more times per week. Really!! There is sound science behind this. When I look beyond the exhausted feeling after intense exercise, I notice a feeling of well-being, meaning I’ve re-balanced myself.

4. Going outside and noticing what is around me shifts the focus from my inner turmoil. I focus on the feeling of the wind and sun on my face, the structure of a leaf. I might even count the number of birds – anything to be more externally oriented.

4. When anxious, I often have an ominous feeling about something that might happen. For example, if I’m afraid I will lose friends because of social distancing, I make it worse by believing, I can’t make it through this. Instead, I can put things into perspective, remind myself that I’ve made it through some challenging things before. I got through them, I will get through this as well. This is not lying! If you are still alive, you have made it through some tough things.

5. When I’m anxious, I will notice my breath is shallow and fast. I focus on breathing slowly and deeply, inhaling to the count of 4, until I notice my abdomen push out slightly. Then I pause for just a moment then slowly exhale. After just a few minutes of this, I notice that I am calmer.

6. Have you noticed that nothing is perfect in this pandemic? Things are messed up. I don’t have to be perfect either. If I am prone to perfectionism, I will be less anxious if I can accept my imperfections.

We all are living with extra anxiety in this pandemic. But I don’t have to let it run me over. If you need extra help, please connect with Cowichan Family Life for affordable counselling services.

Cowichan Family Life Association 127 Ingram St #28, Downtown Duncan 250 748-8281

Providing affordable individual counselling and personal development workshops for adults. COWICHAN FAMILY LIFE

Suite 28, 127 Ingram Street, Duncan BC V9L 1N8 Phone: (250) 748-8281 Visit our website and our Facebook page! www.cowichanfamilylife.org

We acknowledge the fi nancial support of the Province of British Columbia.

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