United British Expats magazine number 6

OcTOBER 2020

A MAN OF THE PEOPLE

BuiLdiNg EMPiREs TO HELP OTHERs

THE cOMPAssiONATE MiNd HOw TO PRAcTicE ANd ExPREss cOMPAssiON

THE gLOBAL sisTERHOOd TRiBE cELEBRATiNg FRiENdsHiPs BEyONd BORdERs

CONTENTS

EDITORS LETTER

welcome or welcome

3

World News Nigeria's Unrest

4

Cover Story A Man of the People

6

Advertisment Crypto Millions Lotto

Whether you’re new here or have read our publication before, we’re happy you’re here!

7

Feature Expat Parenthood Tribe

Over the recent months we’ve had lots of ups and downs; we’ve seen the good, the bad and the ugly.

However, as always, we like to keep it positive at United British Expats and infect our readers with good vibes, wherever in the world they are and whatever issues they’re dealing with.

10 Community News A Cause for Paws 14 Feature The Compassionate Mind 18 Story Lockdown with Kids 20 Feature The Global Sisterhood 22 Health & Wellbeing Holistic Health & Wellness 24 Food Easy Egg Muffins 25 Travel Argentina 30 Beauty Winter Beauty Tips

COLOFON CEO and Founder:

Abdelhadi Rhiti Chief Editor:

Paula Rapsiewicz Art Direction and Lay-out:

Jacqueline Brugman

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back!

First of all, a big announcement - United British Expats Magazine is celebrating its 6th issue!

We can’t believe it’s already been 6 months and how far we’ve come - all thanks to our readers and contributors.

Since we released our first issue in May, we’ve been growing our team and expanding our audience, and we want to take the time to thank each and every one of you that has made this possible.

We also have a new food columnist and a few new contributors whom we will be welcoming on-board in next months’ issue - stay posted!

Wish you all a wonderful month ahead and I hope you enjoy our October issue of UBE!

Stay safe and sane, Paula x

WORLD NEWS

Nigeria's unrest Nigeria's streets are flooded with demonstrators, as they march out onto the streets to protest against police brutality following multiple claims of harassment, kidnapping and extortion by an infamous police force known as the Special AntiRobbery Squad (SARS).

The protests have been happening for about two weeks, and the demonstrators promise not to give up until justice is served for their community.

On Tuesday 20th October, as the Lagos protests continued to emerge to the streets, despite a state-wide curfew being put in place, the city saw blood and violence; multiple eyewitnesses reported that protesters have been shot dead by army soldiers, who were removing the bodies postincident. The reports were made to CNN. The civilians retaliated, setting buildings on fire and attacking police stations, with even more chaos emerging on Thursday in the Ikoyi area of Lagos. More eyewitnesses stepped forward, reporting gunshots and fire emerging from a local prison.

According to the CNN, Muhammadu Buhari, the president of Nigeria, appealed for “understanding and calm” from the general public on Wednesday, following the public unrest. It's been announced that the SARS unit will be disbanded and the team redeployed; however, the Nigerian community has said that they’re not backing down unless the whole SARS police force is reformed.

Amnesty International reported that a minimum of 56 lived have been lost in Nigeria since the #EndSars demonstrations began on 8th October; however, more have been lost since, as the BBC reported 69 casualties on 23rd October.

Many detainees who have been in SARS custody reported various offences committed by the police force against them, including torture and violent acts. In June Amnesty International released a report which contained 82 documented cases of police brutality committed by the SARS team between 2017 and 2020. It stated “Detainees in SARS custody have been subjected to a variety of methods of torture including hanging, mock execution, beating, punching and kicking, burning with cigarettes, waterboarding, near-asphyxiation with plastic bags, forcing detainees to assume stressful bodily positions and sexual violence. Findings from our research indicate that few cases are investigated and hardly any officers are brought to justice on account of torture and other ill-treatment.”

Lagos state officials claim that all accusations against SARS officers have been thoroughly looked into and dealt with nay applying sanctions.

Most of the demonstrations have been peaceful, although the police teams have been seen using force and violence against protestors, causing casualties and injuries. Many public figures and personalities, such as Kanye West, John Boyega and Trey Songz have taken to social media to speak about the social unrest in Nigeria.

The BBC reported that as of 23rd October, the protests have subsided and the Lagos streets are dotted with police checkpoints and barricades. They also confirmed that a list of 23 police officers who were charged, or are awaiting charges, related to use of force and brutality against civilians, has been published and will soon be sentenced.

Written by Paula Rapsiewicz

SARS have been accused of various crimes against the general public, and have become notorious for their controversial, brutal methods of interrogation.

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“We have to consider our communities and keep a close eye on those most vulnerable, especially during the hard times we are currently experiencing. I urge all British expats world wide to create community groups and associations which can help other expats in need and encourage the connection we share.�

- Mr Rhiti

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COVER STORY

A MAn of the PeoPle Mr Rhiti, the CEO of United British Expats, is a man of many trades. Along with UBE, he also manages multiple companies within different industries; some of these include Drop of Gold and CBD Bubble. However, Mr Rhitis’ most successful and important business venture to date is his company Toxic Assets Management - a financial consultancy firm, specialising in effective management of unsuccessful investments, property and debt related management, as well as a range of other financial disputes, including -

• MediAtion • CoMPAny restruCturing • investMents • legAl CAse MAnAgeMent • BAnk rePossessions • finAnCe deBt solutions

Are you struggling with financial, legal or property issues?

Are you overseas in a country whose laws and regulations you don't understand?

The team at Toxic Asset Management are fearless, and always on your side.

Toxic Assets Management firm works across the whole of Europe, for both corporate and personal clients.

To find out more about Toxic Assets Management visit toxicassetsmanagement.com Written by Paula Rapsiewicz

His passion for helping others, combined with his efficient understanding of international laws, was the start of this thriving company. Mr Rhiti takes on many complex cases and his intention is always to provide support, advise and avoid unpleasant situations for his clients.

Mr Rhiti has highly qualified and experienced lawyers on his team, who are ready to address your legal issues, represent you in court where required and advise you on international laws and regulations you may not understand.

No matter how thoroughly you carry out due diligence, problems can still arise. Mr Rhiti and the Toxic Assets Management team understand that these can often be overwhelming and cause enormous anxiety and stress, ensuring they make your experience smoother and do everything they can to help you overcome any issue, providing effective solutions for all of your financial worries.

They provide confidential, personal and reliable support throughout the process, offering a range of services, including New business opportunities and launches; Business planning, strategy and development; Identifying and pursuing investment opportunities; Asset management, including those defined as toxic assets; Commercial dispute resolution and mediation; Project management and development. uBE-5

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FEATURES

exPAt Motherhood triBe I think most moms can relate to what I’m about to share, which happens in my everyday life.

Every mother I talk to these days, whether she has one child or five, whether she is a new or well established expat, a working mom or a stay-at-home-mom, whether she's homeschooling or not - feels like she is failing. NO mother has it easy right now (or ever has, for that matter).

It’s already hard being a mom, but being an expat mom is a whole new ball game. Being an expat mom means you also have to deal with not having access to your family support

network - therefore zero rest bite, zero support when those last minute changes crop up.

And they crop up regularly, right!?

From experience, I can say that expat motherhood will probably bend you at some point; and you may stay bent for a while. But you won’t break.

Being an expat mom makes you stronger, more resourceful, and more resilient!

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FEATURES Our society prioritizes progress and work above presence and rest. When you're in new territory, new economic systems put even more pressure on expat working moms. We go to bed at night focused on all the things we didn't do, and all the ways we let people down, rather than focusing on all the good we have done.

As a mom, I say the phrase 'let me just…' to my kids more times a day than I can count.

“Yes, we can go to the park, let me just write the shopping list.”

“Yes, I can play with you, let me just make one more call.”

“Yes, I can get you a snack, let me just empty the dishwasher.”

The problem is that every 'let me just' is followed by another 'let me just'... and by the time they're all done, the day is over,

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and I didn't do most of the things I intended, which makes me feel pretty bad about myself.

Sometimes I think - I wasn't present with my kids today, which beats me up, because I do what I do to give me flexibility to be present at all times! I start thinking about the deadlines I haven’t met, or how bad I feel because I couldn't muster the energy to cook dinner.

The house is a mess. I am a mess. The world is a mess.

This negative thinking breeds more negativity which turns into a vicious cycle!

I often say - “tomorrow I will... “ or “tomorrow I must”, but yesterday repeats itself.

But tomorrow comes, and tomorrow goes, and the list of things I didn't get to, or didn't do well, bears down on my shoulders and my heart, and all I can think is, "I am failing."

“Yes, we can go to the park, let me just write the shopping list.”

“Yes, I can play with you, let me just make one more call.”

“Yes, I can get you a snack, let me just empty the dishwasher.”

so... to All the exPAt Motherhood triBe, just reMeMBer; 1

You experience motherhood without a support network. So on those negative days just remember what YOU, and YOU alone, are managing! Still standing? That is not failing!

2

Write everything down! It's possible that I never fully recovered from "pregnancy brain," so I write everything down. A simple tick list strategy is an effective positive reinforcement task.

3

Write down 1 ‘must do’. If you get more done, that’s a bonus.

4

Make a Family Schedule; Get your kids involved so they understand the plan. I schedule everything; Time with my kids, time for exercise, time to network. However, sometimes this can be my biggest downfall, as some days just don’t run to schedule and can lead to feeling overwhelmed and defeated. Just remember goal posts move! Learn to be flexible!

5

Have Fun. Make sure you're doing what you love, it's within your control - you can make the fun. Nothing stays the same forever.

6

Remember the ‘Hike It Baby’ Facebook group is available across the USA - an incredible support network!

Looking for a global supportive mom ‘working tribe’ or an opportunity for change Come say hi @s.jbrown_ on instagram, or visit www.sarahjanebrown.co.uk uBE-9

EVENTS & ENTERTAINMENT

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FEATURE

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The CompassionaTe think compassion this Month…

We truly are in the midst of an unprecedented global health event, unlike anything we have ever experienced before.

The severity that people on a global scale are having to cope with, issues like having the virus, loss of loved ones, the stress of losing jobs and dealing with isolation. We are all impacted and are growing through this together.

Let’s have a look at how we can begin to welcome more compassion into our own lives, and the lives of others, and provide the support, care and love as the year comes closer to an end.

CoMPAssion In this article I will look at what it means to be compassionate in the truest sense, examples of compassion and how to practice this in your everyday life.

Compassion is something you can develop with practice. uBE-14

so whAt does CoMPAssion MeAn? noun: compassion a deep awareness of and sympathy for another's suffering What comes to mind when you hear that description?

You could interpret is as - compassion meaning caring about others, treating them with kindness and feeling a strong desire to help those in need.

But, what is compassion, really?

True compassion goes beyond understanding of another person’s suffering; when you feel compassion for someone, you don't just stand by and watch them suffer. You would take action to try and stop the pain or help ease the suffering.

FEATURE

mind

The Latin word compassion literally means to “suffer together” or “co-suffering”.

Interesting isn't it? A clear example could be seen in a mother - immediately reacting to her child if they have fallen down, hurt themselves or are feeling unwell.

Compassion is in effect empathy with taking action.

Some signs of showing compassion might simply look like giving a hug or saying something kind to help a friend or family member who is feeling sad or upset.

Compassion can come in so many different forms, as well as different levels. Being compassionate is genuinely showing selflessness through actions to help others.

You most probably perform small acts of compassion without even realising it, like;

•

opening the door for someone when their arms are full

•

giving to a homeless person

•

donating to charity shops

•

helping elderly carry their shopping

•

taking the time to check in with someone suffering from illness or misfortune

Remember it involves intention & action

how to PrACtiCe CoMPAssion dAily: Since compassion is a skill that can be learned and strengthened, by learning how to increase compassion, people can build deeper, more meaningful connections with others that will inspire good helpful actions and simple human kindness.

Use these 3 point reminders: 1. Start with compassion for yourself Compassion begins with being kind to yourself too. By making time for yourself, being aware and accepting of who you are. Being patient with yourself and not letting past uBE-15

mistakes control the now. Importantly, also forgiving yourself so you can move forward with a positive outlook.

2. Carry compassion for others Cultivate your compassion simply by the thought of “carrying compassion for others…”. Just like you, everyone else is dealing with some form of a challenge, big or small. Just like you, others want to be happy and free of suffering. Keep this in mind as you meet friends and strangers alike. Maintaining a broad view can enable you to rise above small disagreements & break down any barriers to seize opportunities to help others in any circumstance.

3. Being in the present moment Focusing on the now will help you to be in the moment and not judge yourself and others. Remember that not having all the answers all the time doesn't mean you can’t be useful to others that are hurting. Being yourself and taking the time to be with them, by giving your presence, can be more powerful than you think! The action of physically being with someone when they’re hurting can make all the difference in the world.

the Benefits of CoMPAssion We have all experienced compassion in one way or another and individually felt the power of it, wouldn't you say?

Many studies have found, that kindness, compassion and giving contribute to a list of benefits, such as: • • • uBE-16

improving our happiness good mental health a stronger immune system

• • •

reduced anxiety, stress and depression improved relationships a longer life

Learning how to view your life and others’ lives through a compassionate lens can be transformative.

Compassion is so much more than putting yourself in someone else’s shoes; it’s about developing the ability to understand the emotional state of others and of yourself.

Remember every little act counts and each act will eventually turn that practice into a happy habit!

The Dalai Lama shares one of his practice of compassion; ‘I try to treat whoever I meet as an old friend. This gives me a genuine feeling of happiness. It is the practice of compassion’.

Let us bring more kindness & compassion to yourself and others as we shift to a cosy climate.

My happiest regards, Talu Global Happiness Coach True Awareness Coaching www.true-awareness.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/trueawarenesscoaching/ Facebook https://www.facebook.com/trueawarenesscoaching/ Written by Taljeet Sehra-Eckhoff

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STORY

Lockdown

with kids Well… 2020 hasn’t quite gone to plan!

Covid-19 has rocked the world, and everything we once knew. Keep reading to see how we as a family are (just about) surviving lockdown together.

it started so well…

When the schools closed and lockdown was announced we were shocked like everyone else! But we were full of positivity, energy, ideas and patience!

I had a homeschooling routine, exercise routine, kids activities and fun things organised. But this was all short lived…

Feeling a bit blah...

Fast forward 3 months and my mood is deflated, belly inflated and patience next to none! I mean, THREE MONTHS. My husband breathed loudly and I swear it nearly resulted in divorce! Tensions are definitely high! We’re all baked out, done with Joe Wicks home workouts and over finding new ways to keep the kids entertained.

Ellis will be 11 months old soon. He’s more and more active and mobile but pretty content with lockdown life because he’s so young. The only thing I worry about for him is the lack of interaction with other babies and being out and about etc.

Mason on the other hand had a lockdown 4th birthday… which isn’t at all what he associates a birthday being like… So naturally there’s a promise of a big party when we can have one. He’s lost total interest in homeschooling and to be honest, some days, so have I. It’s hard, monotonous and a real struggle to keep kids of FS age engaged when a lot of their schooling revolves around learning through play and with others.

I’ll be honest, most days he asks for the iPad, and before he’s finished asking for it, it’s already in his hands! We all need a little break right?! His screen time is my rest bite!

This too shall pass And bloody soon I hope! We will of course be proceeding with caution and against all my wants I won’t be hop skipping over to the first brunch that reopens. I think it’ll be a slow and steady journey into adjusted normality.

People aren’t going to forget this over night… We certainly won’t anyway!

I hope everyone is keeping safe… Sending love xxx To read more stories, and gain access to exclusive discounts and giveaways, follow me on Instagram @thecareymum or visit my website The Carey Mum The Carey Mum Written by Yasmin Carey uBE-19

FEATURES

the gloBAl sisterhood There’s two things going on in my head right now...

But a year later, I feel grateful for the amazing group of ladies I’ve connected with. We go walking together, we chat on WhatsApp when things go to crap, and when it gets really bad we are able to cry on each other's shoulders.

We all come from such different backgrounds, some have never lived anywhere but Auckland.

Yet, we have a common ground - our family; or more specifically our daughters. Our values are similar, and our desires for our daughters are similar. When you can connect over the core of life like this, it supports that friendship to blossom.

I was chatting to my mum last week, sharing a conversation I’d had with a friend while walking.

She cracked up laughing… “there’s different names, but people are always the same”.

f

irstly, one of the hardest aspects of moving abroad is making new friends. Meeting new people to have a coffee with on occasion, that part is easy. Well easy is a relative term of course, if you are introverted this is not easy at all, it requires sheer determination to put yourself out there. But making friends, the sisterhood who have your back when things get tough, that is hard to find.

The flip side is that expat life makes the sisterhood easier to find. You tend to skip a lot of the get to know you stuff, and you get straight into the nitty gritty of life, because frankly you only have each other to rely on. Your family and normal support are nowhere near you, this becomes the family you choose.

I feel truly blessed to have found my sisterhood in each location we have lived, and these women are still the ones that I reach out to when I need them.

And they know they can reach out to me too, because to have a sisterhood you have to be a sister in the first place.

Honestly, I didn’t expect it to be easy to make new friends when we were moving to Auckland last year, having lived here previously I knew Auckland is a disparate city and people are very entrenched in their own lives.

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whAt? Mum went on to explain that she’s always been amused that no matter where I am in the world, I surround myself with people who offer the same support and friendship. Then she started interchanging names, and I started to see a pattern. Oh my.

Have you ever considered your true friendships?

Have they ever changed? Or are you doing what it seems I do, finding the same type of people all over the world and literally just changing the names?

Is that a bad thing? Absolutely not! It means we are fortunate to meet amazing people, no matter where we are. It makes me grateful for the amazing support I receive, no matter where I am.

I really do feel blessed and grateful, because without true friendship how do we grow as individuals? Who would challenge us? Who would ask what we’re thinking?

So my dear friends, if you are reading this…

THANK YOU! Thank you for all your love, support, kindness and sisterhood.

Written by Emily Rogers www.expatparentingabroad.com

I really do feel blessed and grateful, because without true friendship how do we grow as individuals? Who would challenge us? Who would ask what we’re thinking?

uBE-21

Holistic Health and wellness In today's modern world it seems like there is a reawakening to holistic health methods, which are based upon the interrelations of mind, body and spirit and the use of more natural methods to heal.

Holistic healing is not intended to serve as a band-aid or a one time fix. It is an ongoing journey of discovery in search of more answers and ultimately; living better, being healthier, and striving for wholeness. People who seek out alternative therapies take more responsibility for their own physical and mental health. uBE-22

If there could be one definition of wellness that would be complete health - body mind and spirit. Holistic comes from the word, whole, and what holistic health does is treat you as a whole. An important factor to remember is to take responsibility for your own health because in holistic health, it is believed that when you take personal responsibility for your health, you will benefit from true healing.

Most people taking a holistic path understand that healing, in part, is up to them. Holistic healing is really a lifestyle approach. Taking a holistic approach involves seeking the tools that will help us attract our desires and find personal power.

H E A LT H & W E L L B E I N G

Although some alternative approaches have a long history, so many of them remain controversial and will continue to be so because we tend to resist what we simply cannot explain. However, it is important to know that people are finding that the holistic health approach works, and is now being used, more widely, for mental health. It certainly has fewer side effects, and can be somewhat cost effective.

Using a holistic approach for mental health is important for those who do not want it to show up on their insurance later, making you uninsurable, if you suffered a little bout of depression. If you are on an antidepressant for as little as 6 months, it can show up on your insurance as a recurring illness, and some insurance companies won't insure you. This is not to say you should never take medications for mental health concerns, it means you have choices and that is what holistic health offers mental health - a more natural and cost effective way.

In the past, mental illness once occupied the harsh frontiers of allopathic medicine. In today's world, mental health patients are often treated with disregard for their whole person, which is the mind-body and spirit.

Physicians go right after their symptoms, hoping to mask their symptoms using strong drugs; however, studies show that current mental health patients are still receiving substandard care.

Natural health, with an emphasis on holistic mental health, focuses on helping a person find their own strengths and use them to encourage and empower them to create a healthy and whole way of life.

Therefore, holistic health and treating common mental health issues can be a useful and safe treatment option.

To learn more about holistic health visit Tyler Woods Natural Health And Wellness [http://www.natural-healthand-wellness.com] a holistic approach to mental, spiritual and physical wellness. Tyler Woods is the host of Holistic Mental Health and Wellness [http://septicradio.com/HolisticMentalHealth.php] on Septic Radio.

By Tyler Woods uBE-23

FOOD

eAsy egg Muffins Quick & Easy

ingredients • • • • • •

4 eggs splash of whole milk sprinkle of dry mixed herbs quartered cherry tomatoes steamed & drained spinach 1/2 cup grated cheddar cheese

Method • preheat oven to 180 fan assisted • gently whisk eggs with a fork, add milk, mixed herbs and all the other ingredients.

• combine but don’t over mix uBE-24

These egg muffins are quick, easy and lunch box friendly. They're also great for baby led weaning, as well as the whole family!

• light spray or butter cupcake moulds or use cupcake cases • fill 3/4 full • bake for about 15-20 minutes • allow to cool a little then remove from the moulds and allow to cool more • Serve immediately or pop in the fridge for later.

egg Muffins for the win These egg muffins are a big hit at our house! Let me know if you guys

like this recipe - you can find me on Instagram @thecareymum.

For more recipes, exclusive discount codes and giveaways, please join my monthly newsletter below! It’s free and comes with my personal no spam promise!

The Carey Mum Community

Written by Yasmin Carey

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uBE-26

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uBE-27

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uBE-28

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uBE-29

BEAUTY

winter BeAuty tiPs During the long winter months, we all have skin and beauty concerns.

Whether its drying skin, chapped lips or damaged strands, it’s all about how much care and effort we provide to those areas. When the temperature changes, so should your beauty routine! Your hair and skin react differently to cooler climates, so you need to redefine your regimen to get the results you want to see. Sometimes we need to step up our beauty regimen in order to see results.

Below are a few tips that will take your beauty routine a step further and promote healthy skin and hair all winter long!

If you want to adapt when the weather gets colder, take note of these Fall and Winter beauty tips to keep your skin and hair looking beautiful.

Winter Skin Care Cold weather means indoor heating which will have an adverse affect on your skin. To combat the drying uBE-30

effects, switch to a heavier moisturizing cream to add much-needed hydration. Lock in moisture by doing this while your face is still wet.

Avoid baths and showers that are too hot, and cool the water before you get out. Your skin will retain more moisture this way and you won't go through the temperature shock so much when you get out. Rub in body lotion on your arms, legs and feet - particularly on your elbows and knees.

Use eye cream at night to combat dryness. If you do this on a regular basis, you'll probably notice a reduction of fine lines and wrinkles. Get your beauty sleep to lower stress and put your best face forward.

Homemade Body Scrub If your hands, feet and elbows are dry, this homemade body scrub will get them back in shape and give soothing relief: Mix a half cup of Epsom salts, one tablespoon olive or canola oil and a few drops of lemon, lime, grapefruit, or orange juice. Apply to the dry areas of your skin, rub gently in a circular motion, then rinse off.

Prevent Chapped Lips Many women only experience chapped lips in the Fall and Winter months. Avoid licking your lips, use a moisturizing lipstick in the daytime hours and apply lip balm before you go to bed.

To remove any unwanted dry skin off of your lips, you can exfoliate them with your toothbrush when you brush your teeth and add a dab of Vaseline to protect them.

Alternatively, for a more gentle exfoliation method, mix a bit of sugar with warm water and use as a natural scrub on your lips.

Winter Hair Care Tips Not only does your skin dry out when the weather turns cold, so does your hair.

Pay special attention to your hair needs. Do some damage control with a deep conditioner if you notice it drying out.

For a quick fix, apply a leave-in conditioner for extra moisture and shine. Products containing argan oil are also great for dry and damaged strands; use a deep moisturising mask to give your hair an instant boost of hydration. https://www.dropofgold-cosmetic.com/argan You only need to wash your hair twice a week, but it's important to wash out any styling products that weigh down your hair.

Written by Kaleem Akhtar uBE-31

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