Portland State Vanguard vol. 71 issue 26

PORTLAND STATE VANGUARD

VOLUME 71 • ISSUE 26 • MARCH 14, 2017

Get Outside It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s...a fleeting moment of Portland’s ever-elusive sun peeking out from behind the clouds.

Response to “proud, unapologetic” white nationalists p. 5

PSU makes top 25 LGBTQ-friendly universities p. 7

French voters head to the polls. p. 8

Preview: NW Dance Project’s reimagined ‘Carmen’ p. 11

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CONTENTS COVER DESIGN BY AARON OSBORN, PHOTO BY STELLA CRABTREE

EDITORIAL

ARTS & CULTURE

RESPONSE TO “PROUD, UNAPOLOGETIC” WHITE NATIONALISTS P. 5

‘CARMEN’ DANCES IT OUT

P. 11

NEWS

GET OUTSIDE GUIDE 2017

P. 13

PSU MAKES TOP 25 LGBTQ ONLINE UNIVERSITIES

P. 7

INTERNATIONAL

GOODBYE SUBPAR ADVICE :(

FRENCH VOTERS HEAD TO THE POLLS

STAFF

COPY CHIEF Thomas Spoelhof

EDITORIAL

COPY EDITORS John Falchetta Harlie Hendrickson

EDITOR-IN-LEAF Colleen Leary MANAGING EDITOR Tim Sullivan

ONLINE EDITOR Andrew D. Jankowski

NEWS EDITOR Jon Raby

CONTRIBUTORS Chris May Gray Bouchat Cassie Duncanson Kevin Hadsell Randee-Jo Manglona Ryan Morse John Pinney Eric Steffen Justin Thurer Kristi Tihanyi Zachary Vendehey Devon Wanderon Morgan Watkins Anna Williams

ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR Alanna Madden ARTS & CULTURE EDITOR Matthew Andrews OPINION EDITOR Jennee Martinez INTERNATIONAL EDITOR Alex-Jon Earl

ADVICE P. 31

P. 8 PHOTO & MULTIMEDIA PHOTO EDITOR Silvia Cardullo PHOTOGRAPHERS Stella Crabtree Lauren Friemark Lauren Hirata Emma Josephson Rachel Lara Nicolas Lee Morgan Watkins MULTIMEDIA MANAGER Andy Ngo

ART DIRECTION & DESIGN CREATIVE DIRECTOR Aaron Osborn DESIGNERS Lauren Chapluk Terra DeHart Shannon Kidd Lydia Wojack-West

Nimi Einstein Chloe Kendall Robby Day Max Wayt Aaron Ughoc DISTRIBUTION & MARKETING MANAGER Chaitanya Deshpande Venkata Naga Sai Dilip Daneti

ADVERTISING ADVERTISING MANAGER Madelaine Eivers ADVERTISING DESIGNER Sam Hicks ADVERTISING SALES Michael Hardy Ilyse Espino Caitlyn Malik

ADVISING & ACCOUNTING ADVERTISING ADVISER Ann Roman STUDENT MEDIA ACCOUNTANT Sheri Pitcher COORDINATOR OF STUDENT MEDIA Reaz Mahmood To contact Vanguard staff members, visit psuvanguard. com/contact.

To get involved and see current job openings, visit psuvanguard.com/jobs Mission Statement The Vanguard’s mission is to serve the Portland State community with timely, accurate, comprehensive and critical content while upholding high

journalistic standards. In the process, we aim to enrich our staff with a quality, hands-on journalism education and a number of skills that are highly valued in today’s job market.

About The Vanguard, established in 1946, is published weekly as an independent student newspaper governed by the PSU Student Media Board. Views and editorial content expressed herein are those of the staff, contributors and readers and do not necessarily represent the PSU student body, faculty, staff or administration. Find us in print every Tuesday and online 24/7 at psuvanguard. com.

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EDITORIAL

Last week, the Vanguard ran a story, “Proud? Unapologetic white nationalists prefer psuedonym.” This has sparked questions about the Vanguard’s intent in doing so. Below is a response from the Vanguard’s International Editor, Alex-Jon Earl.

WHITE SUPREMACISTS ON CAMPUS, A RESPONSE TO THE RESPONSE When I started writing for the Portland State Vanguard, it was because I wanted to bring my unique perspective to the paper. That has not changed. In fact, if anything, that is something I’m even more committed to now. I feel this is something far more important than ever given the times.

I understand the apprehension that some may feel when it comes to the media.

As the “fourth estate,” we are supposed to be the ones keeping the populace informed, fact-checking when necessary, alerting our community of transgressions against society. And yet, some feel that the recent results of the election is largely due to a failing on our part. Frustration with the media, then, is high.

Clearly this frustration is not limited to corporate, nonprofit, and more professional media. Even student media has felt the blowback.

In recent days we have seen our efforts to inform and alert students in these trying times undermined. Certain people have organized, on social media and elsewhere, to discard our papers, disfigure them, or simply leave horrible things in our press box.

As an editor and journalist this is offensive, but as myself, a 2-Spirit Comanche person, this is disheartening.

I did not come to Portland State University for this sort of thing.

I was the one who found the white supremacist flyer and identified the group behind it that spurred on the story. If it were not for my diligence, it wouldn’t have been a story. How many students, then, would have been surprised or shocked at what is increasingly becoming regular incidents of hateful defacement?

This is how journalism should work.

I am very proud of how the story turned out, and I’m very glad that the story does a great job of explaining why these people put up this sort of flyer and why they are actively working on campus: they are white supremacists. The sarcastic, appropriated imagery used on the cover and in the article also explains something important: it advertises notice, urges awareness and uses the white supremacist organization’s own efforts for recruitment as a tool to ridicule them.

There isn’t any space on Portland-area campuses for hateful recruitment and propaganda. The Vanguard is making that clear by identifying these tactics in an academically and historically accurate way to utilize what we at PSU are taught in a way that directly confronts them. However, ignoring the nuances of this is creeping too close to the kind of ignorance these white supremacists are preying on.

The Vanguard works hard to bring students away from this precipice in a helpful and unbiased way.

In my work with the Vanguard I have worked to boost marginalized voices. My first works highlighted a queer artist, Logan Lynn, and the Native American Student and Community Center, a center many of you readers may not be well acquainted with.

I have worked hard to bring in perspectives that have been overlooked or ignored. I have uplifted our Indigenous Water Protectors at Standing Rock, worked with Las Mujeres to bring notice to Latin Night, and I am working even harder on more stories in the coming weeks centering on marginalized peoples, including more on Indigenous education and resistance.

I can only speak for myself, truly, but when I say I am proud of the Vanguard, I truly mean it.

As a 2-Spirit Comanche, I put my life at risk day in and day out just by living out and freely. I’ve survived violence of all sorts, physical, verbal and emotional, and I will continue to endure because that is the Numunuu way. Even when I see inklings of the kind of rhetoric that leads to violence coming from people who otherwise would be on “my side,” I tell myself, as I always do, that my ancestors, from Quanah on one side and Comanche Jack on the other, would tell me that all I can really do is survive.

And that everything else is leading when called to.

Thank you for reading the Vanguard.

ALEX-JON EARL, PSU VANGUARD INTERNATIONAL EDITOR

NEWS NEWS

ASPSU SENATE MEETING ATTRACTS A CROWD JON RABY The Associated Students of Portland State Senate faced a room full of students, group members and leaders expressing fear, anger or frustration with potential changes to the ASPSU constitution regarding PSU’s Organization Budget Council, a subcommittee of the Student Fee Committee that provides assistance and funding to PSU student organizations at it’s march 6 meeting.

The OBC helps student groups and clubs with budget development, event planning, and expenditure processing. OBC has been allotted $553,633 of student funds to be distributed to student groups in the 2018 academic year.

The proposed change would give ASPSU Senate full control of student funding and recognition processes, among other significant structural changes. These changes reflect a model implemented by Associated Students of the University of Oregon.

The constitutional changes would affect more than 100 student groups, with approximately 800 student leaders between student-operated services, Programming Boards, student organizations, and student rec clubs according to Brian Janssen, director of Student Organization Advising in Student Activities and Leadership Programs. The overall number of students within those groups is unknown at this time. Rec clubs and the Rec Clubs Council received no mention within the new constitution proposal, but most student groups are funded through OBC. The majority of those who spoke to the Senate were made aware of the proposed changes by an email from the OBC, which outlined several concerns about how this would affect its function.

“I’m just concerned about the lack of communication from ASPSU about what would be a drastic change that would impact my club, the Neuroscience Club, and other organizations funded through the OBC,” said Thomas Madison, vice president of the Neuroscience Club.

If passed in the Senate there could be challenges in adding both the changes to the constitution and the newly created Senate seats it would require to the same ballot.

New Education Leadership Service Awards would also need to be approved, which is how ASPSU members are compensated, as well as other student leaders across campus.

Public commentors expressed concern about the conflict of interest with Senate voting members’ involvement in student group proposals and funding. Elected Senate voting members would be added to the boards of the OBC and the Smith Memorial Student Union Advisory Board, for a total of

6

THE ASSOCIATED STUDENTS OF PORTLAND STATE SENATE LISTENS TO PUBLIC COMMENT AT ITS BIWEEKLY MEETING ON MONDAY, MARCH 6. LAURENA HIRATA/PSU VANGUARD three voting senators/board members and four non-voting board members.

ASPSU has shown itself not to be a viewpoint neutral organization with the passing of various resolutions, such as the “Resolution to Recommend Divestment from Companies Involved in Israeli Military Occupation.” This crossover of ASPSU senators and OBC board members could put specific student groups at a disadvantage.

The new constitution would also give the ASPSU president the right to veto student groups proposals. That veto could be overturned by a two-thirds senate vote.

The proposed constitution is a third option of possible constitutional changes and saw its first reading at the Senate meeting. It was the first time some senators had heard the proposed changes. At the previous Senate meeting, two other less structurally aggressive drafts to the constitution were discussed.

Recurring concerns from public speakers were a lack of transparency from ASPSU in the lack of communication and the speed at which the process was moving, the potential for a negative impact on student groups and

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14 2017 • psuvanguard.com

clubs and the notion the current OBC structure does not require revision.

At the three-plus-hour meeting’s conclusion, the senators unanimously voted to table the agenda until the next meeting on March 20, conduct at least two additional discussions about the changes and meet with groups that would be affected by the changes.

SMSU Advisory Board Chair Cassidy Hines read a letter to the Senate to start the meeting, wich discussed the lack of power the SMSU Advisory Board would have under the new constitution, which would be limited to building development and maintenance.

According to Hines, the SMSU Advisory Board currently works on policies and procedures, evaluation of programs and facilities, SMSU marketing campaigns, building signage, student event marketing, space leasing and state allocations.

“This fundamental shift that ASPSU is asking for is such a drastic shift from the current model,” Hines said. “The staff and administration we work with and advise do not have the proper information or time to

implement these changes you ask for. This proposed constitutional change completely ignores how [SMSU] currently operates and discussed items that do not even exist here at [PSU], and most importantly the [SMSU] is not a funding board.”

According to the SMSU Advisory Board website, the only vacant seats it holds are for an SFC appointee and an ASPSU appointee.

Members of the board met prior to the meeting and voted 7–0 in opposition of this proposed constitutional change.

“By giving us no say in the proposed changes to our bylaws we perceive that these changes are a hasty takeover of the [SMSU Advisory] Board,” Hines said. “We would welcome the opportunity to work constructively with ASPSU in the future.”

Elected Senate members serving on these boards would not be required to have experience within the organizations they would serve. One reason given for the changes was to increase participation in ASPSU operations, which has seen vacant seats on a regular basis.

CONTINUED PAGE 7

NEWS

PSU RANKED TOP 25 LGBTQ-FRIENDLY SCHOOL

DESPITE POSITIVE RANKING, SURVEY NEGLECTS INPUT OF STUDENTS AND STAFF ANNA WILLIAMS Portland State made the list as one of the top 25 affordable LGBTQ-friendy online schools in the nation by SR Education Group, released earlier this year.

PSU hosts an active Queer Resource Center, growing resources for the LGBTQ community, and education for professors and staff. However, the ranking does not reveal whether or not LGBTQ students actually feel safe or supported on campus.

SR Education Group, founded in 2004, researches online schools based on affordability, number of degrees available, veterans resources and, more recently, LGBTQ community support. To assemble its list, SR Education Group used rankings from Campus Pride, “a national nonprofit that worked with researchers to generate standards and tools for assessing LGBTQ-friendly policies, programs and practices at higher education institutions,” according to a statement from the group.

Colleges fill out a questionnaire from Campus Pride, which awards them up to 5 stars based on the offices, programs of study and other resources schools have in place for LGBTQ students.

Just making the cut at number 25, PSU met the minimum standard of at least 15 available different degree options and at least 3 out of 5 stars on the Campus Pride Index. PSU scored 4.5 stars out of 5.

PSU’s “Campus Pride LGBTQ-Friendly Report Card” includes amenities such as paid LGBTQ support services staff, active ongoing training for hate crime prevention, LGBTQ counseling and support groups,

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 6– “This third option, the entire point of having it is we are actually trying to give more control to students and student groups, as well as increase student engagement regarding the way their money is allocated through incidental fees,” said Andy Mayer, senator and part author of the changes.

“The thing we are most trying to do with this structural change is to intertwine the existence of the ASPSU with other extremely important groups on campus like the OBC and the Smith Advisory Board.”

“After hearing what you have said, I’m not convinced that you are solving anything,”

and a trans-inclusive school health insurance policy that covers hormone replacement therapy.

Craig Leets, director of the Queer Resource Center, filled out the Campus Pride Survey for PSU. The survey includes LGBTQ-friendly policies and resources already in place, but does not survey students, staff or faculty members on whether they feel supported or know where to find resources.

“PSU does a lot of great work to have structures in place to help members of the queer and trans community,” Leets said. “But my critique of the [Campus Pride] questionnaire is that you don’t have to talk to students to get that ranking.”

SR Education Group confirmed that they only rank colleges that choose to participate in the Campus Pride Survey.

Most college ranking methods, most notably the U.S. News & World Report college rankings, do not survey students or faculty to collect data. Rather, they look at freshman retention rates, classroom size, SAT scores, acceptance rates, and availability of financial aid. In the case of LGBTQ community support, schools might offer resources, classes or degree options that meet friendliness standards, but a ranking does not tell prospective students what the social climate is like toward members of the queer and trans communities.

Shel Pomerantz, a PSU junior and desk staff member at the QRC, said the QRC “could always use more support, more resources, more programming, more outreach and more to educate PSU community members on [LGBTQ] issues.” Speaking

as a student rather than a QRC staff member, Pomerantz said, “A lot more could be done to make people feel more supported in the classroom.”

Leets said he agreed with Pomerantz’s opinion. “PSU students spend a majority of their time in the classroom,” Leets said.

“More change could be most effective there.”

Leets pointed out that while students can choose what clubs to join or locations on campus to avoid, student members of any marginalized group cannot pick and choose classes based on how they are treated.

“They can’t self-select out of that class,” Leets said. “They are continuously affected by their experience in the classroom.”

Leets said the QRC has had good communication with PSU President Wim Wiewel’s administration. The Office of Academic Innovation and the Office of Global Diversity and Inclusion both educate pro-

fessors about inclusivity and discrimination in the classroom. PSU has recently garnered praise for continuing and planning to expand its number of gender-neutral restrooms on campus despite President Trump’s repealing of the so-called Obama era “Bathroom Bill.”

However, Leets said even with the support systems PSU has put in place for queer and trans students, “If people have a certain lack of awareness or discontent, just having them doesn’t help.”

Leets pointed out that PSU does have more resources and a better environment for queer and trans students than do schools in other states. For that reason, he said, PSU has an “increased responsibility to do better.” Leets said he wants to balance appreciating what PSU has done to support the LGBTQ community and “to be clear that there is lots of work we still need to do.”

said John Pinney, president of PSU Stage, a student-run theater group. “I’m convinced that you are looking for a problem that doesn’t exist. I do not understand why this senate needs to further involve itself in OBC matters. It seems to me like a power play, the optics of it matter just as much as why you’re doing it.”

Multiple senators showed dissent at the lack of a reason for the proposal, the speed at which it was being pushed through, and whether or not a change in the constitution was a solution to low ASPSU involvement in the first place.

“I heard that part of the problem is Senate turnover; what is the cause of the problem?” said Sen. Mahamadou Sissoko. “Why aren’t we discussing the root of the problem? I’m not against moving forward but I need, and everyone here wants, more evidence.”

“I’m questioning whether the constitution is still really the best place to fix those things because typically constitutions are supposed to be very stable,” said Sen. Nicholas Hash. “They’re not supposed to change every two years like ours has been.

We’ve heard from so many students and only one of them has been positive in relation to these changes. There needs to be more time and public input.”

There was discussion of slowing the constitutional changes down over the course of a year to give all students involved the time to speak on their concerns.

“I’m thinking it would be best to continue this conversation over a longer time and meet with students and student groups,” said Sen. Jemila Mohamed. “Some of my questions still weren’t answered and ELSAs weren’t even brought up, so I would suggest taking more time.”

“This has been very fast; it feels very rushed,” said Sen. Kaitlin Hoback. “But a lot of work has been put into this so far, and I want to be able to continue having this conversation with student groups, and I don’t want it to be something that gets pushed off until next year and then gets brushed under the table and never talked about again, which is my concern. So at the very least I’d like to table this till next Senate meeting.”

An email from the Senate to its public Listserv stated: “There are certainly major concerns regarding option 3, a lot of work goes into building a new governing document and it is no small undertaking…This option is not being taken lightly and we encourage as much feedback as possible.”

Changes to the constitution would need to be approved by the Senate by March 24 in order to be included in the upcoming ASPSU ballot for the April election and would require that at least 3 percent of the student body vote.

The second reading and vote on the constitutional changes will be held at the next ASPSU Senate meeting, Monday, March 20, 5–8 p.m., at a location within SMSU yet to be determined. The public is welcome to attend or speak publicly to the senate.

NIMI EINSTEIN

Disclosure Notice: John Pinney is a current advice columnist for the Vanguard’s Arts & Culture section. Though his public comments did not pertain to his role with the Vanguard, we are disclosing this information for the sake of transparency.

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14, 2017 • psuvanguard.com

7

NEWS INTERNATIONAL NEWS

J’AI VOTÉ: PORTLAND STATE COMMUNITY MEMBERS WEIGH IN ON THE ÉLECTION PRÉSIDENTIELLE CHRIS MAY

French voters will head to the polls to vote for the country’s next president on April 23. While most Americans have their hands full handling the dramatic shift in political climate after the election of current President Donald Trump, many French citizens who are studying, working, and living in the states find themselves in a position to prevent a similar situation from arising in their home across the Atlantic.

The failure of neoliberal economic policies across the globe, along with with pervasive political malfeasance, has created a wave of political opportunism and populist backlash which saw Trump’s election in the U.S. and the affirmative vote of U.K. citizens to withdraw from the European Union.

Stéphanie Roulon is a senior instructor of French and the first-year language program coordinator at Portland State. A dual-citizen, she has lived in the U.S. for over 20 years.

After voting in France’s presidential election in 2007, she took a break from participating in French politics.

“I felt like, I live here, I pay taxes here,” Roulon explained. “I don’t feel like I should be the one making any decisions for people who live there.”

Despite past statements from family and friends back home insinuating that her understanding of the social and political situation of France was limited by her residence in the U.S., the attitude regarding this year’s election appears markedly different.

“This year is more like, ‘You’re gonna vote, right!?’,” Roulon said.

Much of this concern comes from the rise of Marine Le Pen, current leader of the far-right National Front party of France. Le Pen took over the reigns of the party from her father, Jean-Marie Le Pen in 2011. Long infamous for his anti-Semitic and xenophobic comments, the elder Le Pen was ultimately expelled by his daughter from the party he founded.

While Le Pen has distanced herself from many of her father’s comments as she attempts to shift the position of her party toward mainstream French politics, she continues to perpetuate a narrative of French national identity that plays on tendencies for the latent nationalism, racism, and xenophobia in societies to be exacerbated in times of uncertainty and instability.

If no presidential candidate receives a majority of votes during the first round, the toptwo candidates will participate in a second round run-off, scheduled for May 7.

8

In addition to an executive branch composed of the president, the prime minister, and junior and senior ministers, the French Parliament serves as France’s bicameral legislative body, which is made up by the Senate (whose members are appointed by other elected officials such as mayors, councilors, etc.) and the National Assembly (with members who are elected for 5-year terms by universal suffrage).

Annabelle Dolidon is an assistant professor of French at PSU. She has been teaching French language and literature at PSU for nine years, and like Roulon, has been living in the states for almost two decades. She has consistently participated in French presidential elections, but agrees that Le Pen represents a singular threat.

“She’s dangerous because she’s smart,” Dolidon said. “She’s articulate, she’s blonde, blue eyes. And people listen to her, because even though she has radical ideas and she doesn’t hide from them, she articulates them in a logic that people can follow.”

But while the tradition of intellectualism in French society and the secular political landscape in France led to the rise of someone like Le Pen instead of a reality TV star charlatan like Trump, the analogues between the situation in France and that of the U.S. remains stark.

“Just because Marine Le Pen perhaps can form a complete sentence compared to other people,” Dolidon explained, “doesn’t mean she’s less of an extreme-right candidate.”

The problem in France, as elsewhere, is that both the conservative and liberal parties which serve as alternatives to radical platforms such as Le Pen’s are less than inspiring when they make claims to alleviate the social and economic strife.

“In France, if you look at the candidates… it’s a mess,” Roulon explained. “Le Pen doesn’t have to do anything to do right now—just sit and wait.”

François Fillon, the conservative Republican party candidate for president and, until recently, the leader in the polls, saw his lead slip as allegations emerged that he used public funds to hire his wife for a non-existent job, in addition to highlyoverpaying his children for jobs he procured for them.

While Le Pen herself is currently under investigation for potentially fraudulent campaign financing, among other issues, her position in the polls has been largely unaffected.

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14 2017 • psuvanguard.com

NIMI EINSTEIN Benoît Hamon, the Socialist candidate for the presidency, doesn’t need any scandals hanging over his head to ensure that his chances of entering the Élysée Palace will remain negligible. The legacy of outgoing Socialist Party president Francois Hollande, possibly the least popular French president in history, appears to be more than enough to ensure Hamon does not make it past the first round of voting.

Emmanuel Macron, the former finance minister of Hollande’s administration, severed his ties with the Socialist Party last August and began his campaign for president as a member of the political party En Marche!, which he founded in April the same year. In preliminary polling he has fared well against Le Pen, but as the cases in both the U.K. and the U.S. have illustrated, when media institutions are just as disconnected from the electorate as the political establishment, their inability to accurately gauge the direction of public sentiment should come as no surprise.

“If Marine Le Pen doesn’t get elected,” Roulon explained, “it’s definitely going to be a no to her, not necessarily a yes to someone else specifically.”

She went on to reference France’s 2002 presidential election, when the highly unpopular incumbent Jean Chirac was carried to a landslide victory after the elder Le Pen unexpectedly advanced to the second round of voting.

At the time it was reported that “Socialists and conservatives alike described the result as…a ‘disgrace to French democracy.’”

As Dolidon explained, “Usually the first round is a protest vote, so people don’t necessarily vote for their candidate. They vote to say what they’re pissed off at.”

But the danger in such a tactic now is much greater than in past, when the lines between those who are angry, why, and what they’re willing to do about it become increasingly blurred.

Dolidon alluded to the recent surge in sales of George Orwell’s 1984 as a reminder of the warnings that dystopian imaginings of the future represent. But what she keeps in mind during all of this has its roots in the past as much as the future.

The crimes against humanity committed by the Vichy government in unoccupied France during World War II remain a difficult subject to address in French society.

Comments from Jean-Marie Le Pen about gas chambers being a “detail” of World War II represent an unwillingness to come to terms with these legacies and the implications they have for the current political and social climate.

Whether those that go along with a nation’s descent into fascism do so out of nationalist ardor, apathy, fear, or opportunism, the end result is the same.

“That’s the fear I think everybody should have.” Dolidon said. “And I have that fear myself. That put in some circumstances, who would you become? Given the freedom to do whatever you want, or…pushed to fear for your family—even if that fear is paranoia— what would you do?”

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

TIBETAN PORTLANDERS MARK OCCUPATION WITH PROTEST KRISTI TINANYI Right now in Portland, protesting has become a way of life. The need to be heard and to really speak out has become a reality for many Portland State students, regardless of identity. Most are focused on the recent presidential election that has divided and confused so many. But for many Portlanders who are here from abroad, remaking lives in a country other than their motherland, today marked an unforgettable moment in history.

March 10, 2017 is a day of remembrance, civil rights, and a struggle against injustice for the people born in Tibet. And if you were heading to class on that day around noon, you may have encountered more than 100 people marching in protest for this cause.

They chanted as a group, “China! China!

China! Out! Out! Out!” and “Tibet is suffering! The world is watching!”

On March 10, 1959, China forcibly occupied Tibet. Ever since then, this day has been a day of remembrance, but native Tibetans do not have the right to express their pain and suffering. Every year Tibetans attempt to protest this occupation and have suffered many deaths. Even peaceful protests have been met with violence and horrendous backlash.

One protester added, “In 2008, for example, 40 protesters were killed.”

The peaceful walk began at city hall, marched south and turned around at PSU, then passed Pioneer Square and circled back around to City Hall again. Individuals and families alike marched for this cause to commemorate the 58th anniversary of their homeland invasion by the Chinese.

They carried the Tibetan flag, and leading the front of the march they flew both their

DOZENS GATHERED DOWNTOWN TO PROTEST CHINESE OCCUPATION OF TIBET ALEX-JON EARL/PSU VANGUARD native Tibet flag and the United States flag. They were insinuating their call upon the U.S. and the United Nations to become involved in their struggle for freedom.

Many of us have heard the phrase, “Free Tibet!” in our lifetimes, not really understanding what is meant by it. These protesters marched to remind the unaware of China’s occupation of Tibet. What this means for the people of Tibet is extreme discrimination and lack of rights.

Artist, musician and protester Tam Ding says that he has based his art and his music on the struggle that Tibetans face in their country. He creates art pieces that carry this prevalent and unique message: unity for Tibet. Carrying a beautiful painting with a symbol of this message portrayed,

Tam represents the aspired freedom of the Tibetan people.

The 10th of March represents the uprising of the people of Tibet, and many of those voices are coming from those who are now living in the United States. They argue that the Tibetan people are suffering in their homeland.

Many are blocked from being able to learn their own native language and culture, and they have been severely punished for speaking out against this injustice by the Republic of China.

In 2008, more than 40 monks and nuns were arrested and taken as political prisoners for peacefully protesting this cause, which caused an uproar throughout the country. They have been silenced and are calling upon Portlanders, Oregonians, Americans, and the entire world to pay attention to their nearly 60-year plight.

Their message is clear, as Lobsang Dhondup states, that they are trying to reach out to us to help them in their cause, urging Portlanders, “Please support our cause. It’s a just cause.”

Tibetans are fighting for the opportunity to have a voice and exercise the basic civil rights that many of us take for granted. A little social action on the part of Portland can make a difference even on the other side of the globe.

Dhondup ended his statement by saying, “With the support we were able to get from people around the world, we were able to free many political prisoners, so please support us.”

This commemorative peaceful protest asks for our support, which could mean the difference between the continued degradation and civil justice for Tibetans.

MARCH 4 SOMALIA

Somali Prime Minister Hassan Ali Khaire announced to the world that 110 people have died in 48 hours due to a variety of dehydration-related illnesses and ailments caused by an ongoing drought. Prime Minister Khaire’s comments were the latest in a long effort to increase global notice of the long-running environmental crisis that has seen thousands of deaths and many more displaced.

MARCH 5 AKITA PREFECTURE, JAPAN

Three North Korean missiles, part of a four-missile barrage, landed just inside of Japan’s exclusive economic zone just off the coast of Akita Prefecture in the latest provocation against the island nation. This launch comes just days after China imposed a ban on coal imports from North Korea and the assassination of Kim Jong-un’s half-brother.

MARCH 5 MOSCOW, RUSSIA

Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev waved off charges of corruption leveled by activist Alexei Navalny. Navalny published reports detailing some $1 billion in questionable assets and holdings, but none of these are to be believed, Medvedev claims.

MARCH 8 KABUL, AFGHANISTAN

Attackers in medical garb invaded a hospital, killing 30 and wounding 60 or more. The Islamic State claimed credit for the attack which occurred just blocks from the United States Embassy, a claim that has since been debunked.

MARCH 10 CAIRO, EGYPT March 4–10 Alex-Jon Earl

A fabulous statue was found in a working-class neighborhood in Cairo that some believe to be of Ramses II. The potential likeness of the famous pharaoh is being raised from the site of a future housing development, but given developments outside the dirt he is being dragged from he may be quietly hoping to go back in.

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14, 2017 • psuvanguard.com

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NEWS ARTS NEWS& CULTURE

NICOLE PIETRANTONI: FRACTURED LANDSCAPES, FRAUGHT AESTHETICS MORGAN WATKINS What is it about a cotton candy sunset that evokes an indefinable sense of awe in individuals far and wide? How does a waterfall have the uncanny ability to take our breath away? What qualifies nature as beautiful?

These are the questions that run rampant in artist Nicole Pietrantoni’s mind, leading her to examine why we, as humans, view particular landscapes through distinct lenses. In her hour-long presentation in Lincoln Hall on March 7, Pietrantoni showed her craft to Portland State students and opened up their minds to these long-pondered questions.

Born and raised in the Chicago suburbs, Pietrantoni grew up in a family that encouraged her creativity. “My dad was a police officer and my mom was a high school art teacher,” Pietrantoni said. “My mom was very encouraging of making things, and it’s only now that I talk to other people about their childhoods that I kind of understand that mine was very creative and I was encouraged to create things or make things, so I think that did have a big influence on the fact that I’m an artist now.”

With the support of her parents and the natural drive to create, Pietrantoni was able to attain a B.S. in Human and Organizational Development and Art History from Vanderbilt University, later completing her MFA and M.A. in Printmaking from the University of Iowa. “I went into arts administration before I actually went back and got my MFA and pursued art for a career,” Pietrantoni said. “So I kind of took a roundabout way to actually get to making art my life.”

Since finishing graduate school, Pietrantoni has gone on to receive numerous awards and residencies, including a Leifu Eiríksson Foundation Grant, an Artist Trust Fellowship, the Manifest Prize, and the Graves Award for excellence in humanities teaching and research.

After having her work displayed in over 80 art exhibitions around the world, she’s moved on to become an assistant professor of art at Whitman College, where she teaches printmaking and book arts. Pietrantoni is also president of SGC International, “North America’s largest professional organization dedicated to education and scholarship in the field of printmaking.”

When asked how she juggles her many projects and professions, Pietrantoni laughed.

“From the outside, it also really looks like, ‘You’re one of those people who does every-

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ARTIST NICOLE PIETRANTONI GIVES A PRESENTATION ON MARCH 7 IN LINCOLN HALL. MORGAN WATKINS/PSU VANGUARD thing and does it seamlessly, or perfectly!’” she said. “But I can tell you, it’s not seamless and it’s not perfect! It takes a lot of saying no to some things and trying to do my best at the things I am getting into, so it’s a little crazy!”

One of the most impactful honors Pietrantoni has received is her Fulbright Scholarship to work in the stunning country of Iceland, where she started questioning the relationship between human beings and nature and how our perception of nature changes from landscape to landscape. “I was surrounded by so much beauty, or what we’re sort of trained or disciplined to think of as beautiful, and all I could do was just stand in front of it—all these vistas and waterfalls and rainbows and glaciers—and just take pictures; I took tons and tons of pictures,” Pietrantoni said. “I just didn’t know what else to do, and it took me a while to figure out how to make art about that experience.”

Much of Pietrantoni’s work is based on her experiences in Iceland: Her postcard series is comprised of popular sights in Iceland paired with simple phrases or one-liners.

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14 2017 • psuvanguard.com

“It was one of the first projects I did there in Iceland to engage with that tourist experience,” Pietrantoni said. “So I took what was a simple souvenir and created my own version of these picturesque postcards, sort of snapshots that I had taken of the landscape with some text imposed over it.”

Another piece influenced by the beauty standards we set for nature is her Implications, which consists of a glacier image printed on Kozo paper and then hand bound to create 30 accordion books. When folded up into book form, the icy image disappears, revealing text extracted from real climate change documents. “The pieces are simultaneously these beautiful images, but then they close up and they’re these books about something sort of darker, a more ominous side of these landscapes, which are sort of vanishing or disappearing, and that sort of adds a complexity to the way we look at or think about that,” Pietrantoni said.

On the subject of climate change, Pietrantoni feels that it’s her duty not only as an artist and teacher, but also just as a human

being, to speak up about the matter. “I do have a responsibility, absolutely, to think about how I make images, why I make them and to what end,” Pietrantoni said. “What are they for? What are they doing in the world?” She hopes that those who view her art and come to her lectures will realize that it’s important to not only work toward saving attractive landscapes but also everyday nature: “I think in general for humans, if we can’t see nature everywhere—if we can’t see it in the weed in the sidewalk—it’s too easy for us to not protect that or to not value even the patch of grass in front of our house.”

Pietrantoni said she hopes students will take with them “a renewed appreciation for how we look at landscape,” and focus on “art ecology and our place in the natural world.”

So admire that dirty old brick building towering over the streets of Portland. Take a photo of a small patch of grass surrounded by concrete. Search for beauty in the cracks on the sidewalk because nature is everywhere, and it’s dying to be noticed.

ARTS & CULTURE

NW DANCE PROJECT STAGES ALLURING NEW ‘CARMEN’ DEVON WANDERON

DANCERS REHEARSE FOR NW DANCE PROJECT'S PRODUCTION OF "CARMEN." COURTESY OF BLAINE TRUITT COVERT It was a cold, rainy night. Luckily for me, I had the NW Dance Project’s waiting room to keep me warm while waiting for the company’s dress rehearsal of Carmen to start. I also had the group’s resident bulldog to keep me company.

“Tell me about your upcoming production of Georges Bizet’s Carmen,” I asked. “How would you say it compares to the original, and what differentiates the two?” The pink bandana-wearing bulldog acknowledged my question with a slight raise of her head. It seemed if I wanted answers, I’d have to get my hands dirty and resort to the tactics of old-school journalism. Instead I pulled out my iPhone and opened the press release for NW Dance Project’s latest production: Carmen.

I’m not sure if you knew this—I certainly didn’t—but Bizet’s original Carmen is extraordinarily famous. I write for Arts & Culture, and yet had never heard of arguably the most famous of operas ever performed; talk about a paradox. (In my defense, I joined the Vanguard A&C section for that exact reason: to get myself some freakin’ culture! Moving on…)

Skimming through the press release I learned that when Carmen was first brought to life in

Paris in 1875, the show was apparently rather scandalous. “The opera, which is written in the genre of opera comique (lighthearted theme), is set in southern Spain and tells the story of the downfall of Don José, a naive soldier who is seduced by the fiery gypsy Carmen.” Apparently this José dude abandons his childhood sweetheart in favor of the tempestuous temptress, who then proceeds to kick his ass to the curb in favor of her new flame, Escamillo.

“Talk about passion intermingled with tragedy!” I exclaimed out loud to my lazy audience of one; the bulldog, whom I decided to nickname Sarah Jessica Barker, shifted onto her side.

With the basic theme of Bizet’s 1875 Carmen in mind, I proceeded further down the rabbit hole (press release), and emerged in our current year, finding myself face-to-face with NW Dance Project’s reimagined Carmen. To be exact, I found myself in a women’s hair salon. This, along with a men’s barber shop, is where internationally renowned choreographer Ihsan Rustem decided to set his dance rendition of Carmen. Apart from the change of scenery and a few select plot twists, the overall story remains the same (minus all the singing,

that is: Rustem’s version uses Bizet’s instrumental suite).

For the first time since my arrival, Sarah Jessica Barker let out a woof of excitement.

Looking up, I saw the waiting room doors open. The rehearsal was about to begin.

You might think, as I first did, that a couple of hair shops would seem a rather odd setting for a tangled love affair, but Rustem’s choice hit the mark perfectly. To be fair, with Rustem’s all-star supportive team—including world class dancers, set design by Spanish prodigy Luis Crespo, and alluring costumes from Project Runway winner Michelle Lesniak—the performance could have taken place in a garbage facility and I would still have found it just as enticing. If only I knew “opera” could be so full of life and passion, I would have given it a shot years ago! Talk about the perfect precursor to spring.

Forty-five minutes later, I slowly awoke from my dumbstruck state and looked down at my notepad: It was a barren landscape. Not a single word in sight. I could still tell you about the set designs and the hair dryers rolling across the stage, or the costumes constructed

with painstaking detail. About how each character was brought to life through the range and precision of motion only a professional dancer can call into existence. But rather than doing all that and boring you to death, allow me to simply sign off by highly recommending you go experience Carmen for yourself, and leave you with a little something from Carmen herself: Andrea Parson.

Vanguard: Well, I’m speechless. That performance was awe-inspiring. What does the character Carmen mean to you personally, and is there anything in particular that you would like the audience to take away from the performance?

Andrea Parson: The depth of feeling that Carmen as a character is able to feel was especially enjoyable—and challenging—to bring to life. I hope that the audience is able to harness that passion for themselves. Going about daily routines, I think that people oftentimes let certain passions pass them by; whereas, for better or worse, Carmen lives an extremely passionate existence.

You can catch Carmen live at the Newmark Theatre March 16–18 at 7:30 p.m. If you see Sarah Jessica Barker, say hello for me!

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14, 2017 • psuvanguard.com

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It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s...a fl eeting moment of Portland’s ever-elusive sun peeking out from behind the clouds!

Welcome to the

2017

Get Outside Guide LAURYN SMITH-FRIEMARK/ PSU VANGUARD

We saw you, Sun, that one time last week. We trust you’ll make it our way again soon. In the meantime, the Vanguard’s put together a guide chock-full of outdoorsy things to do for when the sun shows its beautiful glowing face once more.

Choo choo choose your own adventure

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It’s a runderful life, oh-oh-OH-oh-oh

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New to camping with outdoorsy intent?

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Nerds going...outside? p.23

Gas, grass and no bus pass

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Fuel your outdoorsy fun with food

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Five assholes of the wild

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Buy food from a tiny outdoor box

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Puff, puff, pass outside of class

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We can simulate the outdoors now

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Get outside, dog p.18

Just stay inside, play Smash Brothers

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Let’s ride our dang bikes, y’all

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Outside is bad. Umbrellas are outside

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It’s like a staycation for hikes

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Just kidding, here is the best farmers market

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Don’t drink and roll in these plants

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GET OUTSIDE GUIDE

GO

BY

F

TRAIN:

U

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A D V E N T U R E S a car, no bike (Really, no bike in Portland?), and you are vehemently opposed to paying those ridiculous surge prices of Lyft or Uber, so how are you to cope?

You can walk wherever you want to go, but that just leaves you stuck in downtown Portland, which does not offer much to do compared to the east side. Maybe you want to see your favorite animal, let’s say an elephant. Well, you can do that at the Oregon Zoo! Wait, how are you supposed to even get there in the first place?

THE WEATHER IS, HOPEFULLY, GOING to get warmer soon and you’ll need a method for getting around Portland. You don’t have

VIA

CHECK OUT TRIMET’S MAX.

It’s easy to use, and to get to the zoo you don’t even need to use a bus (which honestly can be quite intimidating for first time users).

Let’s say you’re at University Pointe apartments by Portland State; all you need to do is catch a Yellow or Green Line train from the nearest MAX station, get off at Pioneer Courthouse Square Station, and catch the Blue Line west toward Beaverton. (Just make sure you get off at the Washington Park MAX Station!)

Another fun place to go using the MAX is out to Cascade Station by the airport. I mean, who doesn’t love wasting time walking around IKEA imagining the perfect kitchen, living room and bedroom. You can even get a bite to eat at IKEA’s in-store restaurant! I realize it’s quite easy to get lost in IKEA; maybe Google can add IKEA to its mobile maps service. That’s just a suggestion, though.

MAX

If you finish your adventure at IKEA, you can head on over to Best Buy and check out the latest electronics, or maybe go relax at Starbucks and snag some coffee along with some frozen yogurt from YoCream!, because who doesn’t like frozen yogurt?

While Cascade Station is the second to last stop on the Red Line toward the airport, you’ll get a chance to see parts of Portland that aren’t anything like downtown. It’s practically a different city way out there!

Wherever you end up going on the MAX, make sure you have a ticket with you. The fines are hefty for anyone caught without a ticket—a minimum of $175—which makes that $5 you spent for an all-day pass seem like nothing.

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ERIC STEFFEN

PSU VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

GET OUTSIDE GUIDE

Star parties offer you a chance to space out CHRIS MAY

TIRED OF THE SAME OLD CELEBRATIONS THAT reaffirm our ultimately meaningless and ephemeral terrestrial existence?

Have you finally caught up on your Netflix queue and left your apartment, only to realize that by “going outside” your escape from the prison of experience and dirty dishes you call your home has merely led to a slightly expanded prison of experience and filth we all call our home? Are you a night owl who likes to look at shiny things?

Star parties have been around since at least 1782 when William Herschel, discoverer of Uranus, brought his seven-foot telescope to the castle of King George III. The King would use Herschel’s telescope to turn his friends’ and family’s gaze toward the night sky (and presumably away from those recent traitors across the pond).

If you, too, would like to turn your view from the political hellscape we call reality and take solace in communion with the cosmos, star parties provide a wonderful venue to gaze into the universe (and for the universe to gaze into you).

I know what you’re thinking: “I’m skycurious, but I don’t know where to begin!” If you don’t know a reflector from a refractor, or if handling other people’s equipment late at night in the middle of nowhere makes you nervous, not to worry! Other weirdos who have been doing this kind of thing for a while will be more than happy to lead you through the darkness.

Oregon Museum of Science and Industry, in partnership with various local associations of amateur astronomers, often

hosts public (and free!) star parties at Rooster Rock and Stub Stewart State Parks during solstices, equinoxes and other periods conducive to stargazing.

In addition to these star parties and other annual stargazing opportunities such as the Perseid meteor shower, this year the universe will also grace us with the first total solar eclipse to completely cross the continental United States since 1918.

Hundreds of star party animals will be making their way to Ochoco National Forest in central Oregon this August to watch the eclipse as part of the 30th anniversary of the Oregon Star Party. For the past three decades, the OSP—a nonprofit organization

staffed entirely with volunteers—has gathered for one week every year to enjoy the bounty of some of the darkest skies in the country.

Part of the festivities include “observing lists”, which are like stellar scavenger hunts to guide both amateur and seasoned astronomers in their exploration of celestial landscapes.

The lists scale in difficulty, ranging from deep-sky objects that can be seen with binoculars to astrophotography challenges like photographing the International Space Station as it completes one of its fifteen daily orbits of Earth. Provide sketches or detailed descriptions of most of the objects on each list and get a pin to show off your astronomical creds to potential mates, so they know how adept you are at locating gravitationally lensed quasars.

Mentoring on how to actually use a telescope is available, and there are also telescope parks where you can casually browse the universe or try to track down that elusive Triangulum Galaxy, Lagoon Nebula or Wild Duck Cluster.

When you’re ready to start your search for TRAPPIST-2, check out the resources below, as well as these general guidelines for first-time star party attendees, courtesy of Rose City Astronomers: •

Bring warm clothing, including more than you think you will need, even in summer.

•

Avoid using white light whenever possible. Cover your flashlight with red cellophane or red tape to help protect everyone’s night vision.

•

Ask for permission before touching any-one’s viewing equipment.

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Green laser pointers are never allowed, except by permission of the event coordinator. They are a hazard to airplanes.

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Park with your vehicle’s headlights pointing away from the observing field.

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Smoking and alcohol are not allowed in the observing area.

Oregon Star Party website: oregonstarparty.org/ Rose City Astronomers star party page: rosecityastronomers.net/star-party-page/ TERRA DEHART

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VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

Astronomy resources for PDX and beyond: stargazing.net/David/portland/index.html

GET OUTSIDE GUIDE

ROBBY DAY

The novice camper’s survival guide ANNA WILLIAMS

CHOOSE YOUR POISON: BACKPACK CAMPING, car camping, trailer camping, beach camping… saying you’re camping when you’re actually staying in your friend’s cabin in Yosemite?

Good news! If your family never taught you how to camp, and you don’t know how to make a fire or sleep on the ground, I have some words of wisdom for you.

EDUCATE YOURSELF BEFORE YOU GO

If you’ve never been camping before, contact Portland State’s Outdoor Program to find out if there is a camping trip coming up soon.

The Outdoor Program is located on SW 5th Avenue behind the Academic Student and Recreation Center. The OP program staff can help you sign up for a trip and tell you what you need to be prepared. The OP is open to Rec Center members and nonmembers, meaning you can bring a non-PSU buddy along. There

is nothing better than going on your first camping trip with experienced individuals there to teach you how it’s done.

BE PREPARED

If you feel confident enough to camp on your own, try to be more prepared than I was last time.

I recently backpacked and camped overnight on the Eagle Creek Trail in the Columbia River Gorge. October was off-season, so the trail was pretty empty and very peaceful. I had all the rain gear I needed, so even though the next morning was pouring, I stayed pretty dry and content. When I got back to my car, however, I found my passenger window smashed, my radio, speakers and repair tools stolen, and my gas line had been cut and drained.

With the poor cell service of the woods, it was pretty difficult to reach any of my friends, but eventually my friend’s mom

was able to leave her job in Gresham and bring me two gallons of gas. I duct-taped my gas line shut and made it home.

After my peaceful, dry hike I shivered in my car for two hours while I waited for help and felt like a fool. I learned later not to park near the trailhead, but as close to the main road as possible to thwart thieves. I was thankful for my emergency blanket and extra layers of clothing. I was protected by all-waterproof gear. I had brought extra socks to keep me warm while I slept. I ate canned chili and crackers like a queen.

I was prepared for one pleasant night in the woods, but not for a band of carbreaking jerks!

GET THE RIGHT GEAR

I cannot offer specific advice on what gear to purchase or what safety precautions to take, because going somewhere unprepared, especially alone, can be

life-threatening. If you’re going to go into the wilderness, spend the money to take a compass navigation class. Invest in a pair of waterproof hiking boots.

Find yourself a rape whistle and some pepper spray. Buy yourself a camping for dummies or idiots book from Powell’s.

The Outdoor Program offers inexpensive gear rental that includes sleeping bags, tents, water canisters, stoves, compasses and even things like rafts and kayaks or ice axes and helmets for mountaineers.

If you are wanting to get in shape for a backpacking trip, PSU offers a onecredit Spring Term Day Hiking class.

And if you have any doubts about the fun of camping, keep in mind that a camping trip on the beach isn’t a bad first date. I got a husband out of it!

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GET OUTSIDE GUIDE

Day Trippy

GET OUT OF YOUR DREAMS AND INTO A CAR MORGAN WATKINS WHILE THE CHARMING CITY OF Portland is filled to the brim with kooky coffee shops and all kinds of hip happenings, it certainly doesn’t hurt to get away every once in awhile. With the help of fresh and innovative means of transportation like Zip Car and ReachNow, you can turn any typically rainy day inside into a trip you’ll never forget.

MULTNOMAH FALLS

No Oregon trip guide could be complete without Multnomah Falls on the roster. I mean, it’s Multnomah-freaking-Falls. Just a 40-minute drive east along the Columbia River, this gorgeous, 611-foot-tall waterfall is a go-to for tourists and Oregonians alike.

Feel free to bring your furry friends along for the ride, just as long as they’re kept by your side on a leash. And if the hike up to the falls leaves you feeling famished, swing on by the Multnomah Falls Lodge, where you can get breakfast, lunch, dinner, and even Sunday brunch.

THE COAST

Spend the day with your toes in the sand along the Oregon coast! While it’s no secret that Oregon beaches are

perfect for stunning photographs, the coast lends visitors much more than just an edgy backdrop to match an even edgier Instagram aesthetic. According to Travel Portland, you can watch from the Neahkahnie Mountain Viewpoint while up to 20,000 gray whales migrate between Alaska and Mexico during the winter and spring seasons. Along with spotting these striking creatures of the sea, people from far and wide can hike around Ecola State Park, go fishing in Astoria and even camp at Nehalem Bay State Park. With a hell of a list of things to do and places to explore, the two-hour drive is well worth it. After all, the West Coast is the Best Coast.

SEATTLE

If you’re into Portland’s city vibes and buzzing atmosphere but want to change things up a bit, head up north to Seattle, home of the fictional(but oh so talented) Meredith Grey and the birthplace of our beloved Starbucks. Behold the Space Needle in all its towering, pointy glory or slap a piece of chewing gum onto the famed Gum Wall. It’s about a three-hour trek by car (depending on traffic), but the sights are lovely and there’s a plethora of

This is Portland.

Quit complaining about the rain and get on out there!

RYAN MORSE

SHANNON KIDD

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THIS MAY COME AS A shock to some of you, but sometimes it rains in Portland. (I hope you were sitting down for that.)

According to Bustle, it rains an average of 154 days out of the year in Portland.

With so many rainy days, we might as well make the most of some of them.

Look, rainy days get a bad reputation and not enough love.

While the rain can definitely stop certain plans dead in their tracks, that certainly doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get out and do something fun.

Remember when you were a kid and splashed around in the puddles? It can be fun to be outside. After all, what’s the point of being in the Pacific Northwest if you don’t like rain? Your house is warm and dry, but staying inside all the time is booooring! Go outside and enjoy the day!

Don’t know how to have fun outside anymore? Don’t worry! We’ve got you covered. (Pun intended–I regret nothing!)

Here are some fun suggestions for what you could or should be doing on those rainy days besides, y’know, staying inside with homework and jobs.

VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

things to do around and about the city.

Bored with Seattle? Keep going north until you hit Vancouver!

ASHLAND

Located five hours south of Portland, Ashland provides a variety of fun and quirky opportunities for adventure. Are you a beer connoisseur? Indulge in a beer tour. Love the outdoors? Hit the river for tubing and whitewater rafting, or go geocaching around Mount Ashland. Do you adore theater? Stop by the Oregon Shakespeare Festival and watch your favorite plays in action. Whatever you and your friends are craving, Ashland has a little bit of everything stuffed into one beautifully quaint town.

HOW TO GET THERE

To any Portlander who would love to get away but does not own a vehicle: Don’t fret! There are plenty of modern and reliable options at your disposal.

For shorter journeys like Multnomah Falls or the coast, ReachNow is your go-to. You can pay by the minute or go with flat rate pricing, which will allow you to save money that could be better spent on touristy tee

GO FOR AN ADVENTURE.

In the Pacific Northwest we’re extremely fortunate to have the wilderness so close to us (and still intact). Go trek through the beautiful forest areas in Portland. There’s something wonderful and majestic about being in a lush green wilderness surrounded by an orchestra of raindrops. Who cares if you get a little muddy? As an imaginary educator often said, take chances, make mistakes and get messy!

GO TO THE COAST.

One of the fun things to do in Portland is to drive away from its drama and off to the coast for a bit. Concerned due to the weather? Don’t worry—the coast is just as awesome on a gray day as it is on a sunny day. In some ways, you get to experience a whole new, more wild and honest side to it.

(The bonus? There are less of those pesky, no good people around!)

WASH YOUR CAR.

It’ll save you time with the hose.

EXERCISE!

Never be afraid to exercise, and never be afraid to take it outside. Consider going for a run! Some of the best runs are in the rain. In fact, they’re probably better than on a hot day because there’s more intensity and less apparent sweating. Put on some kick-ass tunes and go run in the

shirts or other knick-knacks acquired during your expedition. ReachNow specializes in Beamers and Minis, so if you’ve always wanted to drive a BMW but didn’t want to decide between maintaining it or buying a house, here’s your chance.

As for trips to far-ish away lands like Seattle and Ashland, Zip Car would be an excellent option. You can choose from 10,000 cars, reserve a vehicle for as little as an hour or as long as a week, and gas and insurance are both included in the rental price. Just sign up, become a member, and zip your way around Oregon.

If driving isn’t your thing, there’s always Lyft or Uber. These two options are for sure the priciest on the list, but if you’re willing to splurge or bring some friends to split the costs with, definitely go for it.

They’re convenient and will enable you to focus on your company, rather than being stuck watching the road from behind the wheel. Bonus points for involving your driver in your trip!

Whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go and however you want to get there, just don’t forget to come back home.

weather. Or get some friends—much like running, recreational sports like soccer get better when you add water.

SING IN THE RAIN.

You’re going to do it eventually. Make your musical-loving friends (and Gene Kelly) proud of you!

HAVE A WATER GUN FIGHT OR ENGAGE IN WATER SPORTS.

I mean, you could do something normal, but that’s silly. After all, normal is lame!

You’re in Portland—the adopted, commercially viable slogan “Keep Portland Weird” is practically governmentally mandated! Fill up some water guns, balloons and a mini swimming pool and party in the rain. If you’re going to get wet outside anyway, might as well make it on your terms like a boss.

JUMP IN PUDDLES.

Sometimes you just can’t beat the classics. Go outside and jump in the puddles like you did when you were younger. Go ahead and embarrass yourself. Be a kid again! If people give you weird stares, that’s because they’re dead inside. Bonus points if you splash your peers.

In Portland, you should never let the rain ruin your parade. A rainy day can be just as awesome as a sunny day. What are you waiting for? Get on that trusty raincoat, those reliable boots and get outside!

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Five people to avoid outside GRAY BOUCHAT OUTDOOR ACTIVITIES EXIST AS A vacation from our mundane office jobs and the rigorous efforts of school.

Rather than remaining cooped up all day, one can explore the outdoors of Portland and always discover something new, whether that be a crow attempting to eat a whole cheeseburger on the ground or a man screaming at the top of his lungs about how Jesus is great and hates the gays. The outdoors serve as a wonder for each individual to find something new.

Along with all the trees and plants, nature brought us… humans. And unfortunately, we must encounter these specimens while we enjoy our jog or walk throughout town.

And Portland harbors a certain kind of creature that may be considered…annoying.

First up: Sidewalk Sideblocks. You know the people. While you are casually walking to class, you see them from afar. You can tell from their awkward walk that they pose the threat of becoming a Sidewalk Sideblock. As the distance between the two of you lessens, your palms become sweaty and your knees weaken like Mom’s spaghetti. You begin to move to the other side of the sidewalk—the side they aren’t walking on—but for some unknown psychological reason they go to the same side of the sidewalk as you. Like, I mean, but why?

You were trying to get out of their way, and they rewarded you by blocking you once again.

So now the distance is closing and you need to make a move fast. Quickly, you move to the opposite side of the sidewalk. They counter your move by moving in front of you.

“Oh, sorry,” they say. You’re flustered. You had attempted to dodge them multiple times. You hate Sidewalk Sideblocks.

Related: the group of friends that walk in a horizontal line

across the sidewalk, and you have to walk in the dirt or on the curb to avoid them. Even though you passive-aggressively continued to walk to the side, they didn’t move. You didn’t want to touch shoulders with such people, so you resorted to walking on the street.

Next up: Mr. and Mrs. Birkenstocks. Oh, for the love of Portland! Why would you pay $100 to look like that? All you wanted was to go for a peaceful walk with your pals, not to have your eyeballs burn at the sight of Germanic shoewear.

Oh, the humanity! And of course, they have their iPhones out. Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of being retro?

Now they’re taking photos of their feet in the grass. Who is going to like that? No one! With their untrimmed, organic, overgrown, free range toenails, they must believe in the natural form of the human body.

“Yeah man, you gotta let your feet breathe. They carry you, you gotta carry them.” They say this without irony as they inhale a succulent stream from their vape pen.

Another person who made it onto the annoying outdoors list: the bicyclist who bikes with their dog and does not appreciate their dog. You see this person, dressed head to toe in a jumpsuit, wearing those biker gloves with the fingers cut out and a pair of slick Nike shoes. Their dog is on a leash beside them, running alongside, happy as can be with their tongue out. Then the biker comes to a stop for a red light (and of course this particular biker does the thing where they bike diagonally across the road when cars are just about to come), and their dog is happily just looking around and wanting attention. You long to give that dog attention.

This biker doesn’t deserve that ray of sunshine in their life.

All they’re doing is pouring an entire water bottle on their

face, not even acknowledging the happiness bundle. No water for pooch. It really grinds your gears.

Last on our list: Person who picks you, out of all the people in the world, to ask for money, directions, your number, a smile, or anything really. You have headphones in. You can’t hear them while your jams are on. And then they have the audacity to call you rude because you didn’t hear them. But hey, you don’t hear them call you rude, so it looks like the joke is on them!

Even though some people may annoy you outside, the company of friends or just a pair of headphones could distract you from the various people trying to impinge on your fresh air. Happy outsiding!

AARON UGHOC

Places where you won’t be able to smoke next week ZACHARY VANDEHEY AS STATES AROUND THE COUNTRY fight for civil liberties large and small, Oregon stands among the few that have indulged in the luxury of legalized marijuana. Beyond the privilege and sanctity of legality, Portland boasts a smokerfriendly culture and an abundance of tranquil settings for relishing recreational marijuana, or even an old-fashioned cigarette (hand-rolled, naturally) in complete serenity.

Getting your fix without being disrupted can be an arduous process, especially in a big city. However, Portland is home to many secluded areas you may have never heard of that are perfect for a moment of peace. The Rose Garden, as popular as it is, is filled with secluded paths and wooded glens that beg for a ganja break.

Most notable is SW Washington Way, near the Oregon Holocaust Memorial: a quiet, trail-ridden loop of woodland scenery that many people will be upset with me for disclosing. Opposite the Rose Garden, on the way up to the Oregon Zoo, is SW Kingston

Drive: a winding forest road complete with several spots to park and spark along the way. (Caveat: The Vanguard does not advocate driving under the influence of drugs, so remember to bring a designated driver, take an Uber, or just don’t tell us about it.)

If you’re on the other side of the river, Laurelhurst Park on the corner of SE Cesar Chavez Boulevard and Stark Street provides several picturesque benches by the pond to breathe some green and feed some ducks—if they brought enough to match, of course. (Caveat: The Vanguard does not advocate smoking out the city wildlife.) A bit farther out is Mt. Tabor Park, more than twice the size of Laurelhurst, which delivers a similar ambiance complete with benches, ponds and hidden tufts of grass for puffs of grass.

Stuck in the close quarters of North Portland? Germantown Road, between Skyline Boulevard and NW Bridge Avenue, yields a surfeit of pot spots.

Cutting right through the grandiose Forest Park, you will never have trouble

finding a secluded area for a bobo bush binge. If that’s too much beautiful forest scenery for you, cross the St. Johns Bridge and circle back underneath to the Cathedral Park Trail, which offers a remarkable view of the Willamette River and the underside of the bridge while remaining fairly isolated. Pro tip: Don’t bother the can-collectors and they won’t bother you.

For those who are more socially oriented smokers, the NW Cannabis Club at 1195 SE Powell Blvd, open seven days a week from 4 p.m. to midnight, affords all the necessities of the recreational smoker: drinks, snacks, foosball and a spacious outdoor deck for getting some fresh, THC-less, air.

If the devil’s lettuce isn’t your bag, and you’re just looking for a chill patio to get your tobacco fix, Bar of the Gods on Hawthorne is the place for you. With a heated back patio to bask in while you drink and light up, there really isn’t anything left to say. If you find yourself downtown when The Cravings hit you,

head on over to Momo (at SW 10th and Yamhill) or Ash Street Saloon (at SW 3rd and, um, Ash Street).

Portland is home to a plethora of beautiful environments, many of which are perfect date spots for you and Mary Jane (or you and Joe Camel). When you’re an outdoor smoker, surreptitiousness is the name of the game. Finding a spot where aestheticism is at a high and disturbances at a low is sometimes part of the fun. But when you’re tired of playing that game, this guide should help you find an apt venue for your chronic desires.

Oh, and one last thing, fellow smokers of dried herbs: Wherever you choose to light up, remember to clean up after yourselves! Bring a bottle along, stick a portable ashtray in your pocket, or keep a couple of plastic baggies with your Chapstick and Visine. Let’s all do our part to keep Portland beautiful for the next generation of secret smokers!

If you think we actually told you our REAL favorite spots to smoke…you must be high!

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Dogs and cats, living together CASSIE DUNCANSON I promised my partner that we weren’t going in to adopt a dog. We were just going to look. We wanted to wait. We wanted to make sure we picked the right dog. (Spoiler alert: we came back for a dog the very next day. I lied. Unintentionally.) The camera roll in my phone has now gone from selfies and food shots to dog pictures and selfies with the dog.

Otter is a Lab/Collie mutt who appears to have been assembled by IKEA. Attempting to sit involves a complicated gymnastic maneuver that involves dropping his shoulder, butt in air, before rolling over. His favorite things to do include draping himself across your lap (contorting in ways that cannot be comfortable) and Extreme Belly Rubz™, which involves Otter being dragged around in circles on the carpet, pivoting around the rope held tightly in his mouth. (It’s hysterical. Come find me, and I’ll show you at least three separate videos in my phone of the phenomenon.)

Otter wants for very little else than playing with other dogs and running as far as he can.

We adopted this strange creature from the Oregon Humane Society after having officially moved to Portland six months ago.

Since then, I’ve had the opportunity to explore the city beyond its bars and restaurants.

Rescuing Otter has opened my eyes to the fact that there’s an actual outdoors around here. Whodathunk?

It turns out that Portland and environs are great for exploring the outdoors with your dog. In a city where even restaurants cater to our four-legged friends, it makes sense that there’s plenty to do with Fido.

ELK ROCK ISLAND Sarah, a vet tech at Rose City Vet, recommends checking out Elk Rock Island in Milwaukie for dog-shy or dog-aggressive canines. “It’s a great area—you can walk the trolley trail, and in the summer when the river goes down, walk right across to Elk Rock Island,” Sarah said. Right off MAX’s Orange Line, the trolley trail and paths

are well marked and usually pretty quiet.

The trolley trail and surrounding paths are leash-required.

HOYT ARBORETUM Looking to hike around with your pup?

Try the Hoyt Arboretum. It features 12 miles of dog-friendly hiking trails. Tryon Creek State Park, near Lake Oswego, features picturesque walking trails along the creek, with footbridges and benches throughout the park.

GARDEN WALKS Not a fan of hiking, but still looking to get outside with your companion? Check out the Crystal Springs Rhododendron Garden in Southeast, Pittock Mansion in the West Hills, or the International Rose Test Garden in Washington Park: All feature lovely gardens and easy walking trails with stunning views.

Take a break from studying for finals to literally get out and smell the roses.

PARK YOUR DOG HERE Looking for places specifically catering to dogs? Visit Southeast Portland’s Sellwood Riverfront Park on the east bank of the Willamette, or downtown Portland’s Waterfront Park on the west bank. For Northeast Portland locales, check out Normandale Park, where small dogs, big dogs and shy dogs are separated by double gates so that everyone is comfortable. If you’re looking to get your fit on, there is a track adjacent.

Closer in, Mt. Tabor Dog Park features short trails, play areas and plenty of room to explore.

DESIGNATED DOGGER After you’ve been outside working up a thirst, you’ll want to stop for a beer before you go home. Rayna Jensen, a graduate student at Portland State, enjoys bringing her dog Pippa to Growler Guys on Belmont: the Guys keep a box of Milkbones behind the counter.

“This was probably the worst time to get a puppy,” Jensen said. “Everyone tried to dissuade me. I had just moved to a new city and I had just started grad school, and I knew a puppy would be a lot of responsibility. But… it’s still one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It’s so nice to come home to a little thing that is always so happy and ready to play. It definitely makes whatever stress I’m dealing with seem more manageable. Plus, she helps me keep a schedule, which is so important when juggling the classes I’m taking and teaching with whatever else is going on.”

FREE AS A DOG For off-leash fun, Cate at Sellwood Pet Supply loves the Thousand Acre Park, also known as Sandy River Delta Park, out in Troutdale where the Sandy River meets the Columbia: “It’s a very solid and reliable place.”

Deanna at Sellwood Pet Supply recommends Mt. Tabor. “There’s just so many places to go to,” she said, after a moment of indecision.

RACHEL LARA/PSU VANGUARD

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FOR THE CAT PEOPLE Sellwood Pet Supply regularly teams up with Roma County to help adopt cats if you’re looking for a more low-maintenance companion. Currently up for adoption: the lovely Bill Purray, who is “sweet and sassy and would make a great apartment cat,” Deanna said.

Cate added, “He just wants to hang.”

The store has two events coming up. On March 26, Oregon Dog Rescue will be visiting for the day, and on April 1 the store will be hosting the One Tail at a Time event. Come check them out, whether you are looking for a new buddy to hang with, or grabbing some treats for your old pal. Or maybe you want to come meet the fabulous Bill Purray. (I hear he’ll even let you pet him.)

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The rain or shine biker’s survival guide!

ANNA WILLIAMS

PHOTO CAPTION. PHOTOGRAPHER/PSU VANGUARD CHLOE KENDALL IF YOU’RE ANYTHING LIKE ME, you like to ride your bike in this city…under certain conditions. As much as you try to bike to work and school, when the streets get wet and your brakes begin to scream, or it’s so hot that you need a shower longer than your bike ride…you get back in the car.

Before you overwhelm yourself with YouTube videos and gear trips to REI, take advantage of your free Portland State Bike Hub membership!

You won’t find a horde of bronze, spandex-plastered muscles clacking their clip-in bike shoes on the concrete floor while glaring at you behind reflective lizard sunglasses, but a bunch of sweatshirt and flannel-donning, regular people who are happy to answer your questions!

IN THE RAIN? Worried about keeping your bum dry?

“The big thing is putting fenders on your

bike, “ said Dan Penner, lead mechanic for the PSU Bike Hub. Dr. Jeffrey Gerwing, PSU associate professor of Environmental Sciences and Management and avid year-long biker from NE Portland, agrees. Penner wrote in an email, “If you ride in Portland in the winter, PLEASE GET FENDERS for your benefit and that of those riding behind you.”

Fenders are inexpensive plastic or metal caps for your tires that screw onto the middle of the wheel hub.

In addition, Penner explained how there are many clothing options to keep you comfortable in the rain. “We have rain pants and rain jackets,” Penner said. “The rain pants aren’t as big of a deal unless it’s really coming down, and I always recommend carrying an extra set of clothes, or having an extra set at work or school or wherever you’re going.”

Gerwing added, “Jeans in the rain equals unhappy ride.”

Penner said that sometimes heavyweight rain gear will cause you to sweat more, just as you would in the summer months. For that reason, I agree that having a change of clothes is almost always necessary.

IN THE SUN? WHAT’S THAT?!

Personally, I wear hiking shirts or tank tops in the summer, but with plenty of sun-screen. “[This] might seem counter intuitive, but black merino wool t-shirts are my go to,” Gerwing said. “[They] keep me cool and don’t show the sweat.”

Sunglasses are also important because you need to see nearby cars as much as they need to see you.

LIGHTS! Gerwing recommended buying bright, rechargeable lights. While I agree, I’d like to remind everyone to throw them into your bag after parking your bike because they will get stolen. I learned

the hard way in a hospital parking garage of all places.

I’ve always set my rear lights to the flashiest setting, but other bike riders avidly disagree.

“What are my cycling-related pet peeves you might ask?” asked Gerwing. “Blinking tail lights. Just stop the visual madness.”

However, since three bike riders within three miles of my house have been killed by large vehicles turning sharp right corners, I refuse to end my flashy light habit anytime soon. Call me terrified!

LAST WORD Don’t forget to ignore everything I’ve said and go to the Bike Hub yourself. The Hub is located in front of the Academic Student and Recreation Center on SW 6th Avenue and offers free classes and discounted gear and clothing. If anything, snatch one of the Bike Hub’s free city bike maps—you don’t want to use Google to navigate you by bicycle!

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Hoof it: cool little walks in our cool little town

THE EDGEFIELD MCMENAMINS, LOCATED IN TROUTDALE, OREGON. COURTESY OF USER DALE CHUMBLEY THROUGH FLICKR.

KRISTI TIHANYI OK, THE SNOW’S MELTED AND we are back to our rainy Portland weather. It’s time to buy some rain gear, get back outside and get active. Maybe you shudder at the idea of exercise and would much rather do anything else. If so, this guide of cool places that also double as impromptu cardio opportunities will help keep you mentally stimulated while benefiting from the walk. All of these walks are in the Portland metro area, can be reached by bus, and offer unique payoffs.

For those who think exercise is “fun” TriMet bus route 70 will drop you off right in front of Columbia River Correctional Facility off of 33rd and Marine Drive in Northeast Portland. Don’t worry, this walk isn’t into the prison. Head north toward Marine Drive and you will come to a somewhat creepy underpass that is the base of a bike trail. Along the trail you can watch planes and often military jets take off overhead. Walk, jog, skate or Rollerblade about a mile east and you will be greeted by a scenic view of the Washington shoreline and the Columbia River. This is a perfect walk to get a little cardio blast, kill some time, and have a cool visual reward by the end of it.

Walk and drink at McMenamins If exercise itself is not at all appealing, but you are just looking for a change of scenery and you also enjoy IPAs and eerie settings, Google your neighborhood McMenamins and head over during happy hour. McMenamins locations are awesome becasue most of their sites have plenty of space to walk around the grounds with your beer in hand. Most of them are converted from old properties, and you will have to stray away from the Portland State one to get the full walking experience. The Kennedy School on 33rd, Edgefield in Troutdale, and the Rock Creek Tavern locations all have cool stomping grounds where you can work off your calories as you drink them.

Kelly Point This is the best option for those who really want to feel like they are leaving the city. Kelly Point has a trail that follows the Columbia River, then curves where the Willamette splits off and runs south. It is the venue for major festivals every year, and people always barbecue on the beach in groups during the summer. You can walk for a while, then lie out and tan on the beach, watching barges and yachts go by. This is a great place to walk around and people-watch, enjoy the beautiful view of the riverbanks and get that nature feel right in North Portland at the end of Marine Drive.

Don’t party next to these plants!

ALANNA MADDEN

oak can also be identified by the white flowers that form between March and June, which turn into berries once fertilized.

Poison oak produces an oily organic allergen called uroshiol, which causes contact dermatitis characterized by a sexy, itchy, red, blistering rash. Unfortunately, allergic reactions aren’t only caused by touching the plant itself. Don’t burn the poison oak either! Inhalation of the plant’s volatile fumes can also poison those near the fire.

Stinging nettle Urtica dioica Stinging Nettle loves the humid, wet environment of the PNW. Probably because it’s a good break from the heat of the hell

NOW THAT SUMMER IS JUST around the corner, many of us are bound to find ourselves outdoors for some wholesome camp ragers. However, before you lunge into your next keg-stand, try to stay coherent enough to avoid these bummer Oregon plants!

Poison oak Toxicodendron diversilobum Poison oak is commonly found all over the Pacific Northwest and can be identified by its smothering vines and tall, leafy shrubbery. Poison oak leaves are usually bronze colored in February and March, turning green in the spring and then yellow to orange as the summer progresses. Poison

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from which it came. Stinging Nettle can be often found in meadows with tall, protruding leaflets and flowers that are covered with stinging hairs. If you’re unfortunate enough to fall into this plant, be prepared to pick out these needle-like hairs while soothing down the Stinging Nettle chemical rash.

Deadly nightshade Atropa belladonna Deadly nightshade is less-common than the other buzz-killers mentioned before.

The biggest difference is that deadly nightshade will really fuck you up. The good news is that you just have to avoid eating the berries…or any part of the plant really.

Deadly nightshade produces tropane alkaloids, causing symptoms that range from blurred vision to hallucinations, loss of balance, rashes, dry mouth and throat, delirium, convulsions, and even death.

Deadly nightshade can be identified by its long, thick roots and branches that produce large, faintly purple bell-shaped flowers. Deadly nightshade berries are initially green but turn black once ripe.

Poison-hemlock Conium maculatum Don’t let the poison-hemlock’s tall, dainty, lace-like flowers fool you into believing you’re safe from harm’s way. This plant took out Socrates himself! Poison-hemlock can be found throughout the United States along roadsides, creek beds, ditches, the

outskirts of fields and in waste areas. Poison-hemlock’s roots are commonly mistaken for wild parsnips, although ingestion of poison-hemlock’s poison can occur from any part of the plant.

According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, poison-hemlock is very poisonous to animals too, causing palate and skeletal deformities in livestock that are indistinguishable from the lupine-induced crooked calf disease. Symptoms of poison-hemlock poisoning include trembling, loss of coordination, weak pulse, respiratory paralysis, coma, and death.

SHANNON KIDD

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Physical and mental health benefi ts of being outdoors GRAY BOUCHAT IF YOU’RE AT ALL LIKE me, you try to stay indoors because, well…that’s where my laptop is.

That’s where I know I can watch Netflix at any time in the sanctuary of my warm, cozy bed, accompanied by my indoor cat (note the “indoor” part). I get outside when it is necessary—going to work or school—but then I retreat back into my studio for some good ol’ binge watching.

However, no one really talks about the health benefits of being indoors (besides like, not being taken out by an ax murderer because you decided that ONE time to risk it and go outside).

Dare I say, I think there are more health benefits of being outdoors than indoors.

First off, the sun. Yes, too much of anything can be a bad thing; however, “too much sun” has never been uttered in Portland. When the sun does hit town it’s as if the clouds departed just to present the citizens of Portland with the ultimate gift of sunshine. Finally, you can put those vitamin D pills down and take it in naturally!

Nothing can really boost your immune system, health and mood quite like the sun can.

The warmth, when it kisses your skin, is unlike any other, especially if you live in Oregon.

Another health benefit of going outdoors is creative production and basically, overall mental health.

Yes, watching Netflix and eating a lot is a great vice. However, what kind of benefits does that hold?

Going outside, taking in the fresh (somewhat) air and exploring the environment around you actually produces more creativity and concentration. Overall, it increases your brain functionality.

Look at it this way: When you are home, doing your own thing, what kind of experience are you ensuing for your mind?

Yes, homework and reading can definitely inspire you, and it can definitely make your brain work, but that is only a small fraction of what your brain needs.

Stimuli from the outside can increase your productivity because not only are you happier, but you are also more relaxed and level.

You can also become so much more inspired outdoors. Do you really think Edgar Allen Poe wrote his poem “The Raven” while cooped up inside? He probably saw a raven and was like, “This would make a dope poem.” Okay, maybe Edgar Allen Poe isn’t the best example.

But I know for a fact that John Keats wrote “Ode to a Nightingale” because he saw a bird on a tree outside his kitchen window. Bam! Inspiration.

In fact, you can even use the outdoor air as caffeine. Lying in bed makes your brain think it is time for bed and that you should be sleepy, which is why people who spend most of their time indoors tend to be sleepier than those that spend their time outdoors. Also, fresh air is a natural stimulant, rather than those fresh-ground coffee beans.

Something else entirely suitable for a college kid is stress reduction.

Ever notice when you’re in the woods and the fresh smell of pine tickles your nostrils, you suddenly aren’t as worried about your midterm as you were inside your house? That’s because the peacefulness of the outdoors triggers endorphins within your brain to help you relax.

So instead of drinking a ton of coffee and nervously watching your show while in the back of your brain you think, “I’ll start my paper at 8 p.m. Oh, it’s already 8:01? Gotta wait till 9 p.m.” Why not just take a walk outdoors?

I could probably use some of my own advice and take some more walks outdoors. Even in the rain, it is far more healthy to walk around outside than constantly stay cooped up indoors.

So grab an umbrella (no matter how un-Oregonian that is) and get walking!

Tips and tricks for when you can’t get outside RANDEE-JO BARCINAS-MANGLONA SPRING IS JUST AROUND THE corner, but if we’re being honest, that means that there are plenty more rainy days ahead. Although this is something we’re all used to, sometimes we just can’t deal.

For the days we can’t handle the heavy rain boots or the struggle of carrying a huge umbrella, it helps to know that we have other options. Here are a few tips to keep you happy and healthy for when you can’t get outside: KEEP YOUR VITAMIN D IN CHECK As natives of the Pacific Northwest, our chances of vitamin D deficiency are pretty high, and this winter has been one of the worst seasons ever: If it wasn’t snow, it was ice. If it wasn’t ice, it was hail. If it wasn’t hail, it was pouring rain. There has been little room for a decent amount of sunshine this winter, and if there was, it only lasted for a short period of time.

Sadly, we are still experiencing this extremely gloomy weather, and as a result we are not able to receive the sufficient amount of vitamin D that our bodies need. When we are exposed to sunlight our bodies naturally produce vitamin D. With a good amount of vitamin D our bodies are able to absorb calcium, thus ensuring the growth and preservation of healthy bones. Since we cannot rely on the sun these days, the best option for us to receive vitamin D would be through nourishment such as fish, dairy products and orange juice. Another great option would be to start taking daily vitamin D supplements.

AVOID DEPRESSION We all know that the dark, gloomy days along with cold, biting weather make it easy to fall into the trap of depression. For some people, depression is tolerable.

If you’re one of those people who gets bummed out because of the weather, you’ll want to shake those winter blues by focusing on the things that make you happy.

If you’re a hardcore Netflix binge-watcher, use the time indoors to catch up on the television shows you’ve always wanted to watch. If you’re a bookworm and have a book that you’ve been wanting to read, get rid of the despondency by indulging in a good read.

However, if your depression is serious and deep, it is good to know that there is hope and help for you. Treatment like psychotherapy and some medication can help.

It is imperative to gather up the strength to reach out for help, as depression can lead to permanent damage in your work, education and relationships.

BE PRODUCTIVE There are many things you can do when you can’t go outside. For instance, why not use the time indoors to actually do the cleaning you’ve been meaning to do for months? Wash your bed sheets. Get rid of the clothes you don’t wear anymore. Clean your bathroom. You’ll feel so much better about having to stay indoors if your place is tidy and fresh.

If you have a ton of homework, get to it! Imagine having all your homework and papers completed by the time the weather decides to be nice. You’ll get to go outside, have some fun and make the most of your day without having to feel guilty or stressed about a load of assignments waiting for you at home. The goal here is to keep your mind occupied as much as possible so that time will pass quickly.

WORK ON YOUR INNER CHEF Remember when you promised yourself to start eating home-cooked meals instead of instant ramen, take-out and microwavable pizza? Take advantage of the ugly weather and use it to practice your cooking skills. If you’re on Facebook or Instagram, Tastemade offers fast and simple recipes and tutorials that are fun to try out. If you’re feeling inspired, gather up your favorite soup recipes and experiment. Your homemade soup could cheer up your loved ones and maybe even get you a hot date. Before you know it, you’ll be warming up people from the inside out.

If there’s one thing we know for sure about Portland, it is that we never really know what the weather’s going to be like. What we do know is that no matter what season it is, rain itself is a native and will always be around to either drown us or cleanse us. During the days that it drowns us, these tips can help get us through the misery.

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It’s a Runderful Life DEVON WANDERON

HIBERNATING FOR THE WINTER HAS its perks, most of which are supplemented by a steady intake of caffeine. The most widely abused hibernating perk of them all—according to the numbers—is Avoiding Physical Activity. Can you really be expected to maintain your peak physical state when Portland’s roads are iced over and the only safe thing to do is stay indoors and binge watch Stranger Things on Netflix? I think not.

In fact, being able to use the winter hibernation excuse to avoid...well, to avoid anything, really, is why I moved to Portland from Florida in the first place. In Florida, there is no winter. Winter is never coming.

Actually there’s not much of a spring or fall either: just a never-ending cycle of humidity. Out-of-state friends constantly berate you for not spending enough time on the beach, but trying to stay in shape when you can’t justify taking a month off due to the weather is a full-time job.

That’s why I find Portland’s winter months so relaxing. Avoiding the cold

during the day is relatively simple, and at night you can typically rely on the odd fire or two—which every decent city protest is likely to have—to keep you warm. The fires aren’t so much an act of defiance as they are a physiological necessity.

Which leads us to where we now stand.

It is with great angst that I must report our period of hibernation is puttering to an end.

Just yesterday as I was walking to class, I noticed a flower bursting forth from its dirtfilled coffin of a city planter. The insolent little beast. By my calculations we have, at best (after factoring in the spring cleaning excuse) another month until we will be expected to join the rest of nature in its seasonal celebration of all things living. The time to prepare your body for that celebration is, unfortunately, sooner rather than later.

“How the hell do I prepare my body for spring?” I shouted from my apartment window to no one in particular. Staring out into the night, I saw my beacon of hope silhouetted against the gloomy cityscape:

the Academic and Student Rec Center.

Thinking back to fall term, I suddenly remembered all of the Campus Rec Clubs recruiting students into staying physicallysocially-mentally fit! Now all I had left to do was find the perfect club. Piece of cake.

Badminton, baseball, bouldering, oh my! The Campus Rec Clubs webpage (pdx.edu/recreation/rec-clubs) offers over thirty clubs, which is a problem if you’re as indecisive as I am. Eventually I plan on trying them all, but for now I could only choose one. Then I saw it: the RAP club.

I’ve always considered myself a modern day MC, and compared to running around a basketball court, the idea of a leisurely stroll through the city while creating dope rhymes was tremendously appealing.

It turns out the “RAP” club—otherwise known as Running Around Portland—has nothing to do with dropping improvised beats. So much for avoiding running.

Not being much of a runner myself, I was close to performing an immediate about-

face, but after being reassured that the club caters to all levels of running capability, I figured I’d give it the ole freshman try.

Three weeks later and I love it!

This club really hits everything one might hope to find in a Campus Rec Club. Exploring Portland while getting in shape: check. Socializing while having the option to tune out the world with your dope beats of choice: check and check (got those dope beats after all). While running might not be for everyone, I highly recommend you give RAP a try for yourself. Cherry blossom season is nearly upon us (early March) and I’m sure there will be a few scheduled runs to take advantage of nature’s springtime bounty.

I think there was even mention of a possible future run with a picnic afterwards!

And hey, if Running Around Portland isn’t your cup of tea, don’t let that keep you down.

All you have to do is move on to the next Campus Rec Club! After all, with over thirty clubs to choose from, there’s bound to be a club out there to break even the most stubborn of us out of our winter hibernation.

Pacifi c Crest Trail get ready guide JON RABY

SPRING BREAK IS COMING AND you want to feel like you actually did something, instead of just passing you by with drunken, cigarette smoke-filled nights on your porch. This year, try breaking the habits of mediocrity and begin a hiking adventure on the Pacific Crest Trail! Here are a few tips to help get you PCT-ready.

Weigh your backpack and cut out every fucking ounce possible! Practice hiking around town with additional weight for training. Use gallons of water or other heavy stuff. You can’t just show up on the trail and expect to walk 20 miles in one day, you have to work out now and get used to the feeling of having a heavy backpack cutting into your hips.

You will need a light-weight sleeping bag and a 1–2-person tent you strap to the outside of your bag. If you’re traveling with a lover, I suggest sleeping in separate tents.

At the end of the day you will be dirty, stinky and tired. Your own space is nice.

I’m sure some people will bring a solar-powered charger for their smart phones. While phones are a good idea for emergencies, if you’re posting to Facebook while on the PCT…go...the fuck…home!

You will need a white gas stove, and one cooking pot. Store the stove and an assortment of spices in the pot for space.

Anything you bring should be as light as possible.You will also need a water purification pump. The pills work too, but they seem gross to me.

For food on the PCT, most of you will want to buy freeze-dried beef stroganoff meals for seven bucks a pop. I’m sorry, but these are disgusting despite the huge

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quantity of useful calories they provide.

I prefer small grain rice and lentils, Ramen noodles, trail mix with chocolate and cranberries, oatmeal, a head of garlic, along with some cheese and salami for the first few days. Clif bars are great, and Jolly Ranchers are nice to suck on while hiking. You should also bring a bottle of Wild Turkey. Expect to eat a lot, but don’t bring too much—food weighs a lot. A good variety of herbs and spices can be lightweight, as is a small bottle of cooking oil.

Gatorade bottles are the lightest, strongest water bottle by the way. Two liters should be good, depending on the time of year (later in the summer some streams dry up).

You won’t find any garbage cans on the trail, so avoid product wrappings and reduce your garbage whenever possibe.

Pack out what you pack in.

Protection for me is a knife and bear spray, but this is a personal decision.

Clothing should be light and easy to wash in streams. Don’t overpack! A single pair of shorts, pants, a few shirts, rain gear, thermal shirts, and about three pairs of socks. Use environmentally friendly soap like Castile (Dr. Bronner’s).

The map and guide book for this is pretty standard: Pacific Crest Trail from Wilderness Press. There are two books, one for Cali, one for OR/WA. You can also rip out pages of the section you will do to cut down on weight.

Bring a pad for writing, a book that you will be too tired to read, and some marijuana to be smoked out of a tin foil pipe. I don’t bring music because I like the sound of the woods, but hey– maybe you can’t live without it?

VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

OK, now you’re good. Go! Disclaimer: This is the Jon Raby special. VG isn’t liable if you’re drunk and stoned and a bear steals all your candy... or limbs.

PHOTO COURTESY OF USER SAMANTHA LEVANG THROUGH WIKIMEDIA COMMONS

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LARP it up, suckers: how to die at the end of my magic missile ALEX-JON EARL

LIVE-ACTION ROLEPLAYING, OR LARP, IS the fine art of boffing a PC to death in a harrowing scenario set in—oh, hell, let’s just say medieval times. There’s a dragon, I guess.

And the spring is poisoned by rogues.

How do you LARP? The most important rule to follow when LARPing is that there are lots of rules. That’s basically it. The GM, or game master, will guide you and other PCs (player characters) through the game. Your role, your actions, how you engage with scene-changing NPCs (non-player characters, often the same as a stagehand), are guided by the GM. They’re the George R.R. Martin of the LARP world.

They will kill you.

So…can you kill things?

Sure, you can totally kill things! If the GM allows it.

If this limitation bothers you, however, you can’t actually kill the GM. There’s no actual rule set that allows you to enable godmode and destroy the GM. You can’t even powerword your way into godmode. Unless that powerword is “called your mom.”

Anyway, a good deal of LARP is conflict and problemsolving, so sometimes there’s fighting, and that’s where skills, boffers (foam weapons) and the rules of play come in. Sometimes a NPC will bring in a prop that represents a dragon and you attack it. That’s cool. Sometimes a dog runs into the field, but that’s not a dragon. That’s Queen Bavmorda of Nockmaar and she’s a cockapoo. Don’t hit her.

Pet her.

Are there any rules I should follow?

Yeah, first: Don’t touch strangers without permission! DO NOT TOUCH STRANGERS, JERK. I’m serious. Don’t be awkward. Get permission. Have boundaries. Don’t let others encroach on yours. Consent for one kind of contact doesn’t imply consent for others.

Second: You aren’t the GM! I mean, unless you are, in which case, congrats on being a GM prodigy and getting there on your first try. Otherwise, play along and get along.

Third, if it’s a day game then expect a loooooong day. Stay hydrated and get ready for a pretty intense (and fun!) experience.

So, any suggestions on what kind of character I should be?

Thanks for asking, here’s your character!

Name: Van the Guardian Race: Half-Orc Class: Sorcerer STR: 13 / DEX: 12 / CON: 10 / INT: 20 / WIS: 13 / CHA: 14 …okay?

Well, you can cast Magic Missile. Remember, you have to yell “MAGIC MISSILE!” for it to work.

Like, in front of everyone?

Yeah.

Why? Live. Action. Role. Playing. What part don’t you get?

Now get out there and LARP some shit up!

ILLUSTRATION BY

PSU VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

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The hunger pangs TIM SULLIVAN

PHOTOS BY SILVIA CARDULLO/ PSU VANGUARD WINTER IS NEARLY BEHIND US and spring is tantalizingly close. Despite our infamous rainy weather, we Portlanders can’t wait to get outside for a new season of adventures. Whether you’re hiking the hill or strolling the neighborhood, don’t forget to bring a (homemade) snack or two to keep those hunger pangs at bay. Otherwise, you might find yourself curled up in a ball out in the middle of nowhere—or in someone’s overgrown lawn, and that would be awkward.

OVEN-ROASTED CHICKPEAS If you love hummus and falafel, then this roasted chickpea snack is up your alley. This recipe makes 8 servings and is loaded with fiber, which will keep you feeling full longer.

STRAWBERRY JALAPEÑO FRUIT LEATHER

This nostalgic snack is given a grown-up twist by adding the spiciness of jalapeño (or habanero if you want it really caliente). The only downside to this snack is its 5–7 hour bake time. But, if you’re patient, you will be rewarded.

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VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

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3 cups of chickpeas, thoroughly rinsed.

1 tablespoon of olive oil 2 tablespoons of honey 1/4 teaspoon of sea salt 1 teaspoon of cinnamon 1/4 teaspoon of nutmeg

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Preheat your oven to 375 degrees F. Drain and rinse the chickpeas in a colander under cold water. Place the chickpeas on a towel or a sheet of paper towels to dry.

Line a sheet pan with parchment paper or use a silicone cooking mat.

Spread the dry chickpeas on the lined baking sheet and place in the preheated oven. Cook for 45 minutes.

In a large mixing bowl mix the oil, salt, honey, cinnamon and nutmeg.

Once the cooking time is up, pour the still-hot chickpeas in the mixing bowl with the seasoning mixture and toss together.

For a more caramelized texture, place the seasoned chickpeas back on the baking sheet and put back in the oven for 10 minutes.

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1 1/2 lbs of strawberries, leaves removed 1 jalapeño or habanero, deseeded 1/3 cup of sugar Pinch of salt 2 tablespoons of lemon juice

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Preheat oven to 170 degrees F and line a baking sheet with a silicone baking mat and set aside.

In a blender, blend together strawberry, sugar, salt and jalapeño until a fine puree forms. This should take about one minute.

With a fine-mesh strainer over a medium-size saucepan pour the puree through the strainer. Using a rubber spatula, scrape against the surface of the strainer to push the puree into the pan, leaving only the seeds in the strainer.

Heat the puree over medium heat and stir occasionally, scraping the sides and bottom of the pan, until the puree starts to bubble on the side.

Reduce the heat to low and simmer for 15–20 minutes, stirring occasionally until the puree reduces and thickens. Remove the pan from the heat and pour in the lemon juice and stir. Transfer the reduced puree to a heatproof container with a spout.

Slowly pour the mixture onto the baking sheet with the silicone mat, tracing the border of the mat. Fill in the rest of the rectangle with puree. Using a rubber spatula, spread the mixture evenly.

Place the baking sheet in the oven and bake for 5–7 hours, or until the top of the fruit leather is sticky. Tap it with your finger—if your finger doesn’t leave an indentation, then it’s ready to come out of the oven. Let cool completely.

Transfer the fruit leather to a piece of parchment paper the same length and width as the baking sheet. Using kitchen shears, cut the fruit leather and parchment paper in 1-inch strips and roll.

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CHOCOLATE DIPPED HOMEMADE GRANOLA BAR What’s one of the easiest grab-and-go snacks today? If you said the granola bar, you’re right. It’s simple—some oats, crispy rice, maybe some nuts and dried fruit. How can you go wrong? Well, if you’re buying your granola bars, then you are. If you’ve made rice crispy treats, you can make a granola bar. Here’s how you do it.

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Butter or coconut oil 1 1/2 cups of brown rice cereal 1 cup of rolled oats, don’t use instant 1/2 cup of sliced almonds, or cashews 1/4 cup of raw wheat germ 2 tablespoons of dried, untoasted and unsweetened coconut flakes 2 tablespoons of flax seed

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Preheat oven to 350 degrees F and oil an 8×8 baking pan excessively with coconut oil or butter and then set aside.

On a baking sheet, spread the rice cereal, rolled oats, nuts, wheat germ, coconut flakes and flax seed in an even layer. Then bake the cereal mixture for 12 minutes, stirring the mixture halfway through.

Take out of the oven and let cool.

In a medium-size saucepan place the honey, peanut butter, brown sugar, salt, vanilla and cinnamon and cook over medium-low heat. Stir until the mixture combines and the sugar is dissolved.

Pour the cereal mixture into the honey-peanut butter mixture and combine. At this time add your dried fruit. Transfer the concoction into the oiled 8×8 baking pan. Using a rubber spatula, press and spread the mixture evenly and firmly. Set aside to cool.

Once cool, flip the pan over and tap the bottom so the granola square will release. If you’re having a problem with the granola releasing from the pan, use a paring knife and run it along the edge of the granola square to help facilitate the square releasing from the pan. Once out of the pan, split the block down the middle with a knife and then cut each half into four rectangular bars, giving you a total of eight granola bars.

In a microwave-safe bowl, pour in half of the package of semi-sweet chocolate chips and microwave for a minute and a half, stir the chips and then microwave in 15-second intervals until completely melted.

Dip the bottom of each granola bar into the melted chocolate and place chocolate-side-up on a cooling rack. After all of the bars have been dipped in the chocolate, place the bars in the fridge or freeze to set the chocolate. About 1 hour.

Once the chocolate is set, wrap each bar in parchment paper and put in an airtight container. Consume within one week.

• 1/2 cup of honey, brown rice syrup or agave • 3 tablespoons of peanut butter • 1 tablespoon of packed brown sugar • 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract • 1/2 teaspoon of ground cinnamon • 1/4 teaspoon plus 1/8 teaspoon of salt • 1 package of semi-sweet or bitter-sweet chocolate chips

A walk around food cart city

EMMA JOSEPHSON

I GREW UP JUST ACROSS THE bridge in Vancouver, Washington—home to many small breweries, coffee shops and unique restaurants. Little did I know that when I moved to Portland, I would discover all of my favorite cuisines at the convenience of food carts just two blocks from my doorstep.

As Portland State students and residents of a “food cart city,” we can discover delicious food around every corner. Many carts feature distinct flavors from countries all around the world, from Thai to Indian to Cuban and soul food.

Even dietary restrictions don’t limit your options. At every food cart pod you can find vegan, gluten-free, Halal, Kosher and many other options to suit your needs.

I took some time to meet food cart owners and customers. Kareen, an immigrant and owner of Kabab, said that even though profit is modest, she earns more by cooking than her previous career in her home country. “I’m just here now working in the food cart, meeting people and making food,” she said. “I love it!”

Rekhe, a cook at New Taste of India, told me that she appreciates students because they are loyal customers. “I love students because they come every day,” she said.

“That’s why I like working here.”

The closest food cart pod to PSU campus is on SW 4th and Hall. Poom Pui is a popular Thai food cart which seemed to be the crowd favorite among students I interviewed. “I like the crispy pad Thai—it’s easy to eat,” Ayden said.

“Yeah, it’s very good and the Thai tea is perfect!” added his friend, Tino. “You guys should try it!”

If you want more food cart choices, you can get off at the Portland Streetcar’s downtown Target stop and walk across the street to SW 9th and Alder to find dozens of other options.

With over 40 food carts on and near the PSU campus, and hundreds more around the city, you’re sure to find a new favorMultimedia at psuvanguard.com ite cart that caters to your tastes and dietary needs.

WATCH THE DOCUMENTARY ON OUR WEBSITE. EMMA JOSEPHSON/PSU VANGUARD

PSU VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

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Video games for the closet agoraphobe JUSTIN THURER Hate going outside, but love nature and video games? Me too! When I look out and see Mt. Hood, I sometimes wish I were hiking it. However, as soon as that thought hits I immediately eschew the idea in favor of, well, something that doesn’t require me to exert immense amounts of energy. Fortunately, for those of us who want to hike Mt. Hood but also don’t want to change out of our basketball shorts, there’s a solution! I’m going to introduce you to three games that will help you scratch your itch for nature but also allow you to keep those shorts on.

THE LONG DARK

LYDIA WOJACK-WEST

The Long Dark is a first-person open-world survival simulation game available on Microsoft Windows, Linux, MacOS and Xbox One. It takes place in the Canadian wilderness (that’s sort of like Mt. Hood, right?), where the player is a pilot who recently crash-landed and is trying to survive after an apocalyptic disaster. The player has to regulate their own body temperature, keep track of their caloric intake and watch out for a myriad of other factors as they try to survive. The Long Dark even

includes “permadeath” to simulate real life, meaning once you die you have to start a completely new save file regardless of the amount of progress you have made. The Long Dark was lauded by critics for its amazing graphics and unique mechanics.

ABZÛ

ABZÛ is an adventure simulation game available on Microsoft Windows, PS4 and Xbox One. My favorite of the three, ABZÛ is truly something to behold. It may only last two and half hours, but it will be some of the best time you’ve ever spent gaming. ABZÛ takes the player on a beautiful journey through the ocean rescuing sea creatures from the clutches of an ancient deep sea enemy. You’ll dive and swim through beautiful coral structures, be able to identify the genus and species of different fish (it’s fun, I promise) and fall in love with the ocean in ways you never thought possible.

FIREWATCH

Firewatch is a first-person mystery adventure game available on Microsoft Windows, Linux, MacOS, Xbox One and PS4. Firewatch

takes place in the Shoshone National Forest in Wyoming in 1989 after the 1988 Yellowstone National Park fires. The player takes on the role of Henry, a fire lookout, whose only method of communication is a walkie talkie that connects him with his supervisor, Delilah. Henry has to navigate the forests, discovering new areas as the player dictates his actions through choices in dialogue with Delilah. Firewatch also features a day-night cycle, creating an extra element for players to maneuver around.

Whether you want to explore the vast Canadian wilderness, immerse yourself in the beauty of the ocean, or try to solve the mysteries of Shoshone National Forest, you’re guaranteed to have that itch scratched. Maybe you’ll master all three games and become a master of the virtual outdoors. Who knows? Even better, grab a VR headset and really feel like you’re exploring the world from the comfort of your desk chair and those basketball shorts! Whether you decide to explore the world through video games or not, the most important part is having fun!

Super Smash Bros. smashes on after 17 years NICOLAS LEE

THE SUPER SMASH BROS. CLUB PLAYS ON THE NINTENDO GAMECUBE CONSOLE. NICOLAS LEE/PSU VANGUARD

Multimedia at psuvanguard.com

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VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

THE SUPER SMASH BROS. CLUB at Portland State hosts weekly gaming sessions in Smith Memorial Student Union. The recognized student club brings together an eclectic group of people to connect and play a game that is over 17 years old.

The original Super Smash Bros. was released on the Nintendo 64 gaming console in 1999 and handles like a traditional fighting game, featuring characters from various Nintendo franchises from Super Mario Brothers to Legend of Zelda. Smash was originally marketed as a party game and quickly developed a competitive fan base that still plays to this day. The series has seen periodic new releases across several Nintendo consoles over the years.

“It really goes from an international scene with thousands of players, all the way down to where it really started, at the small, local level,” said Kellen McInerny, event organizer of the Super Smash Bros. club. “That’s where our club fits.”

Spencer Purcell, president of the PSU Smash club, wants the group to be a place where students can de-stress. “What I want the club to be is an opportunity for people to get together once or twice a week to help them take their minds off school or other things that might be stressful,” Purcell said. “[We provide] an open and welcoming atmosphere for anybody [who is] interested in playing Smash.”

Watch our video report by Nicolas Lee

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Umbrella Etiquette CHRIS MAY In the same inexplicable way that a little rain suddenly renders many Portland drivers mildly insane and incapable of adhering to the most basic tenets of driving etiquette and common sense, oftentimes when people grab

an umbrella they immediately forget about their newly expanded sphere of personal space and proceed to piss off every single person they come in contact with. Don’t be that person by keeping these umbrella etiquette tips in mind.

CHLOE KENDALL

PSU VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

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The guide to

PSU Farmers Market KEVIN HADSELL

THE PSU FARMERS MARKET IS OPEN EVERY SATURDAY YEAR-ROUND FROM 8:30 A.M.–2 P.M. RACHEL LARA/PSU VANGUARD SATURDAY, 10:02 A.M. I arrive on campus and park my bicycle at one of the green bike staples along the street. Straight ahead through the rain and across the paved stone path leading to the quad, I see it: white tents flapping in the wind, crowds of people milling about, examining the produce, carrying canvas shopping bags.

I am here finally, at the Portland Farmers Market.

I meet Jenny, a friend of mine who lives on campus and we wander together through the crowd.

The Portland State Farmers Market has been in operation since 1992 featuring up to 140 stalls along the quad of the PSU campus. Over 20,000 visitors frequent the market every Saturday, which is open yearround from 8:30 a.m.–2 p.m.

The market features fresh produce by local vendors, artisanal cheeses, baked goods, locally-produced meat, coffee and food vendors. I have come here to experience first-hand this weekly event—the crowds, the natural bounty of the Pacific Northwest—and see what there is to see.

To visit the Farmers Market is to experience the nucleus of the Portland food scene: These vendors issue forth the artisanal dishes,

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ethnic cuisine and celebrated recipes that have made the Pacific Northwest a garden of earthly foodie delights.

Wandering the stalls, I’m immediately struck by the amount of produce I’ve never heard of: the strange, otherworldly vegetable life that simply grows out of the earth with nothing more than sunshine, water and soil.

Who knew for example, that there were so many varieties of potatoes? Where do they come from? From what dark recesses of the earth do they issue forth? At the market I see names like Huckleberry Gold, Colorado Rose, Mountain Rose, Amarossa, Red Bliss, Inca Gold and others.

I wander, transfixed and overwhelmed. Toward the interior we pass a stall selling winter squash. The placard reads, “Thelma Sweet Potato Squash.” I stop and look into the crate. I pick one up. It’s the size of a small pumpkin, teardrop-shaped, bright yellow, ringed with bumpy ridges running vertically along its sides.

“So,” I say, to no one in particular. “Is it a potato, or is it a squash?”

“It’s a sweet potato squash,” says Jenny.

“But is it a sweet potato, or is it a squash?”

“It’s a squash,” she says.

“Okay.” I put it back where I found it.

Sweet potato squash, I think.

VANGUARD • MARCH 14, 2017 • PSUVANGUARD.COM

The stage in the center features musical guests throughout the day—for now an artist named Jet Black Pearl plays songs on the accordion. Beyond the main stage there are other, less-official musical guests who seem to come and go at will. Someone near the library is playing a metal hand-drum that sounds like the strings of a harp. Further out toward the periphery, the piercing wail of a trumpet can be heard. I’ve seen him before: He’s a regular feature at the market, always at its furthest edge, playing to whomever stops to hear his interpretation of “La Cucaracha.”

I pause at a tent selling pickles and sauerkraut. I read the sign.

“I’ll have one of those pickles on a stick,” I announce. And then on a whim, “And one of the probiotic brine shots, too,” which I learn are shots of leftover brine used in their sauerkraut. The flavor I’ve selected is “spicy garlic.”

“So is there anything I should chase this with?” I ask.

“Well… it’s not that kind of a shot,” the vendor says. “So no, not really.”

“I guess that’s what the pickle’s for?”

“Ah, yeah, sure,” she says. “That’s what the pickle’s for.”

She places a large pickle, impaled on a skewer, into a wax paper bag and hands

it to me. I take my pickle and brine-shot and continue.

I slam the shot of brine which is, as expected, both spicy and garlicky. I instantly feel my sinuses clear. This must be the probiotics working, I think, wondering what probiotics actually do.

Later I try a sample of fuji apple on a toothpick from a local vender.

“Woah,” I say. “That’s a really good apple.”

“Well,” Jenny says, “Most apples you buy in the supermarket are picked prematurely and allowed to ripen in-transit. These apples were fully ripened on the tree.”

Right on, I think.

By now our shopping bags are laden with purchases: chipotle cheese curds, green garlic, olive ciabatta bread and a bottle of chocolate-flavored vodka from New Deal Distillery.

We exit through the opposite side of the quad. Behind us we hear the dulcet tones of a trumpet soaring over everything, playing the same musical phrase he’d been playing an hour ago.

“There’s that trumpet again,” I say.

“Yup,” Jenny says, “He’s here every week.”

And he would be here next week too, and the week after that.

The market is, after all, a year-round affair.

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We offer charnpurrado, atoles, care de olla, e drinks, home pupusas, espresso cofef made tamales, soup ofthe day and desserts.

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YOUR DEGREE DOES NOT DEFINE YOU JOHN PINNEY

HELLO, EVERYONE! THIS WEEK I’D LIKE to take some time to reflect. I’ve been at Portland State for almost three years now, and I am finally graduating. During my time here I’ve watched people push themselves to the brink of exhaustion and weep with joy because they won Subway gift cards. I’ve watched student groups try to get budgets passed and been a part of some very fun bingo nights. I’ve watched protests and street preachers. I’ve eaten at Joe’s Burgers and Hot Lips and was completely shocked when the McDonald’s got shut down.

Before I go, I’d like to pass some advice to you. Whether you’ve been here long enough to remember my first few awful shows as a KPSU DJ or you’ve just met me through my “Subpar Advice” column, I hope you’ll find something in my words that will hold you fast through the rest of your college career and life beyond.

1. Your degree does not define you.

Sure, you’re paying quite a bit to be here, but if the piece of paper is your endgame, that’s a bad endgame. College is the beginning, the stepping stone, the investment into your life. And life is short. And your college experience goes by in the blink of an eye. You’ll have some regrets, but live your college life so you have those regrets and things to remember.

2. Learn how to advocate for yourself This one spills over into your workforce life. We’re always told just to be thankful we have jobs at all, but you also have to think about the quality of work and the amount of time you spend working to make money just to survive. I want more than that. I want to live. I want to enjoy my life. And I don’t think that should make you a snowflake. Learn what you need and how to advocate for it. Unabashedly, but not abrasively.

3A. Your allies are everywhere.

College may seem like nothing more than a bureaucratic nightmare, and it may make you feel powerless. But you are not powerless. And sometimes simply rais-

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ing your voice will show you who agrees with you, though other times it won’t. For instance, PSU Student Union had wanted to get rid of Aramark because of some practices they don’t agree with. But what I didn’t see them doing was working with SALP, who deals with the Aramark contract and had been having that debate for over a year.

3B. Know what metaphorical hills you’re willing to die on.

As with the above example, PSUSU has a heart that’s in the right place, and most people would agree that a living wage of 15 bucks an hour is a good thing. But PSUSU is doing a lot beyond that—so much that they spread themselves pretty thin.

When I was a DJ with KPSU, they never came on my show even though I asked them several times. In this case, they didn’t utilize their community correctly.

When they formed, they had about fifteen issues they were fighting all at once. They didn’t pick one thing to fight for—some one thing that they might have achieved by now. I have no idea what their one cohesive passion even is.

4. Don’t talk trash.

Unless it’s called for. Then talk all the trash.

5. Every term is like a pint of ice cream.

Sometimes you’re gonna get a lot of delicious cookie dough. Other terms?

Smooth ribbons of caramel. And sometimes all the grocery store is gonna have is rum raisin and you have to make do.

But stay strong…you never know what the next pint might taste like.

6. Community is gonna help you get through rough times.

I can’t tell you how wonderful the first couple of terms before I became a student leader were. I tried rock climbing and yoga classes and just experimented. Though I lived off campus, I put myself out there not just because I was paying for these experiences but because even as a commuter, I knew it was important to stay around

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14 2017 • psuvanguard.com

LYDIA WOJACK-WEST people with an educational focus and to enjoy myself at the same time. When was the last time you enjoyed yourself?

7. The street preacher ain’t gonna go away just because you yell back at him.

Is that the most creative protest you can really think of? There was a guy in Scotland that played bagpipes to drown the street preacher out. Get creative.

8. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

I don’t know who coined this old chestnut but it definitely applies, right? Just because you think it’s still a good idea to drink four Red Bulls and write a fourpage paper in an hour doesn’t mean it is.

And you know that, deep down.

9. Take breaks.

Not long, interminable ones, but even just an episode of South Park might be enough to give your brain a reset. You

like pinball? They have an Addams Family machine at Hot Lips.

10. Your degree does not define you.

Your debt does not define you.

Your number of spoons does not define you. You are a masterwork. You are a creation of great potential. But you have to climb for it, strive for it. Nothing will be handed to you. You have the power, but you have to own that power. I believe in you. I believe that even if you fail, your attempt will resonate with the universe.

Do not become weary. Become yourself.

I’ll leave you with my favorite Maya Angelou quote (it’s the start of a much longer poem). When you get tired— and you will—just remember what she said. It may do you more good than you can believe.

“You may write me down in history with your bitter twisted lies. You may trod me in the very dirt, but still like dust I rise.” – Maya Angelou, And Still I Rise, 1978.

ETC

A SERIOUS LAUNDRY CRISIS SUBPAR ADVICE FROM THE SUB-BASEMENT JOHN PINNEY

Crisis of Faith writes:

Move Your Laundry asks:

My mom and I both have anxiety, and I’ve found a great way to combat mine that’s more natural than pills. CBD oil is really helping me to manage my everyday life and grab many of the energy spoons throughout the day that I use as a way of talking about my anxiety. I want to suggest it to my mom, but she’s a super conservative Christian and already thinks I make some bad life choices. Do you think I could get her to try it without telling her exactly what she’s trying? It’s worth it if it helps, right?

Why is it so hard for people to move their laundry? What’s the official ruling on how long I can wait to move it—on both busy days and non-busy days in the dorm?

Heya Laundry,

Heya Crisis,

Oh, God...I do identify with this. I cannot begin to understand or fathom people who don’t set timers on their phones. You don’t have to stay with your laundry per se, but you should have some idea of your cycle time.

Hmm, this is a tougher case than you’d think. On the one hand, you want to respect people’s beliefs and world views. On the other hand, conservative Christians overwhelmingly voted for Trump. So what to do?

I especially don’t like having to move bras from the washer to the dryer or waiting three hours for someone’s field hockey game to get done with so they can move their laundry. You’re not the only one using the space. Be respectful.

I would say at the end of the day you are the best proof for talking your mom into trying CBD oil. Instead of completely blindsiding her, why don’t you become a sort of two-week trial candidate. You already know how it’s helped, so give your mom the proof by living your life well for two weeks and keeping her informed on why it’s going well. Treat CBD oil as if it’s completely new and groundbreaking and wonderful. You become anecdotal evidence personified.

All that diatribe aside, I hate moving other people’s clothing, but sometimes you don’t have a choice. My not-official ruling is that on the weekdays, you have an hour to move your stuff after the cycle ends. On the weekends, you get thirty minutes.

I also would suggest, instead of just piling it on top of the machine, have a separate laundry bag ready for other people’s wet clothes so that you have a space to write something on. And by bag, I mean have a trash bag. Not because you’re going to throw it away, but more because you shouldn’t expect to get it back.

At the end of the two weeks, sit your mom down and bring some CBD oil. Now they’ll have two weeks’ proof of its workings and an honest list of ingredients to look at. That way you’ve given all the information without added pressure, and if your mom still won’t take it, maybe at least you’ll have planted a seed.

Your mom is a grown-up who is capable of making their decisions, and you have to respect that. If you foist something on them, then you’re no better than the Christians who voted for Trump.

Hearts and Stars, Your Advice Guru

Cruelest Boss Ever writes: I found this part-time job at a small business, and I’ve really grown attached to my co-workers. It seems like the perfect fit, except for the owner. He’s verbally abusive, and a lot of my co-workers have already left because of him. I’ve thought about calling in to a tip line but I’m afraid he’ll find out. Is there anything I can do, or am I just stuck as long as I work there?

Heya Cruelest, Well, most whistleblower lines are anonymous, so you don’t have to worry about the bad boss finding out. Truth be told, it’s possible that you’ve had co-workers have who called, and that’s made the boss’s behavior worse over time. Not that that should ever be a reason not to call.

Always remember, it’s better to stand up than to back down.

Otherwise your laundry will never get done on time.

Hearts and Stars, Your Advice Guru

You have to stand up for yourself. I feel like my generation and the generation after—(I don’t care if you think I’m a millennial: We 30-year-olds are not millennials) have been told that we have to be compliant and complacent because we’re simply lucky to have jobs.

But being abused is not a matter of good luck. And some might think you’re a snowflake for not wanting to deal with verbal abuse. But if you’re spending forty hours a week hearing that, that’s pretty bad.

I know not everyone has the luxury of finding a new job, but while the protections are in place, you have to take advantage of whistleblower lines because otherwise the douchebag boss wins. And he probably voted for Trump. You have to do what you can to make your workplace safer.

If it helps, consider the case of the woman who exposed the inner workings at Uber and all she went through. If she can go through it and come out the other side better, so can you.

You are not your job. Your job is just a stepping stone in your life. You are you, and you deserve better than verbal abuse.

Hearts and Stars, Your Advice Guru

ILLUSTRATIONS BY AARON UGHOC

PSU Vanguard • MARCH 14, 2017 • psuvanguard.com

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Andrew D. Jankowski

EVENT LISTINGS FOR MARCH 14–20 FEATURED EVENT LITERALLY ANY ST. ALL-AGES TO 21+ PATRICK’S DAY EVENT FREE TO NOT FREE MARCH 17–19 Some people consider St. Patrick’s Day a celebration of Irish culture and identity, whereas others call it the Amateur Hour of Drinking Holidays. Whether you attend a booze fest at Paddy’s, Kells, EastBurn or Vancouver’s Esther Short Park, dance at the Crystal Ballroom, or go running at Lee Farms or through downtown Portland, there’s something for you to do this weekend.

TUESDAY, MARCH 14 SPEAKING 6 P.M. SCIENCE ON TAP: ALBERTA ROSE INSIDE THE FELINE THEATRE MIND $8–13, ALL AGES Veterinarian and animal behaviorist Dr. Roland Tripp explains the secrets of cat behavior while those of age can sip on beer and wine (though people under 21 are allowed to join).

POETRY INDEPENDENT SWITCH READING PUBLISHING SERIES: ABREU, RESOURCE CENTER GOLDBERG, HARRIS FREE, ALL AGES 7 P.M. Poetry reading from acclaimed poets and thinkers from New York and Portland.

This installment features manuel arturo abreu, ARIEL GOLDBERG and Jamondria Marnice Harris.

FILM 20TH ANNIVERSARY:

8 P.M. (MULTIPLE SHOW DATES & TIMES) AUSTIN POWERS: MISSION THEATER INTERNATIONAL MAN $11, 21+ OF MYSTERY

It’s the 20th anniversary of a comedy about a spy (Mike Meyers) from the 1970s waking up in the 1990s, which is undergoing a ’70s nostalgia revival.

Would space/time break if you attend in your best ’90s nostalgia attire? Attend and find out!

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 15 DRAG SCANDALS HOTT MESS FREE, 21+ 7 P.M. Ecstacy Inferno’s weekly drag contest pits drag and burlesque performers against one another for a cash prize of $500 and guaranteed bookings at popular East Portland parties OKURRRRRR?!?! and NecroNancy. The results are, well, a hot mess of filth and depravity.

MUSIC MISSISSIPPI STUDIOS BLOSSOM FREE, 21+ 8 P.M. The rising R&B vocalist just performed at the MoGo Music Festival, and now she’s playing this free showcase at one of Portland’s coolest venues.

THURSDAY, MARCH 16 COMEDY BETH STELLING 8 P.M.

(MULTIPLE SHOW DATES & TIMES) HELIUM COMEDY CLUB $15–23, 21+ Time Out Magazine named Beth Stelling a Comic to Watch in 2016. The L.A. comedian has been broadcast on the TV shows @midnight, Conan, Chelsea Lately & Jimmy Kimmel Live.

MUSIC REVOLUTION HALL RED FANG $20–25, 21+ 10 P.M. The Portland metal band has traveled around the world, performed on The Late Show with David Letterman, and shared the stage with Mastadon, Megadeth, Opeth and Disturbed. Now they play one of their hometown’s newest and biggest venues for a night of brutality.

FRIDAY, MARCH 17 ART PORTLAND ART $5 AFTER 5 MUSEUM 5 P.M. $5, ALL AGES Our fair city’s art museum’s monthly discount night lines up in time for two major exhibitions: the Iris & B. Gerald Cantor Collections of Rodin sculptures, and Constructing Identity: the Petrucci Family Foundation Collection of AfricanAmerican Art.

MONDAY, MARCH 20

THEATRE

(MULTIPLE SHOW DATES AND TIMES) PORTLAND CENTER STAGE 8:30 P.M. $25–75, ALL AGES Music and comedy in a one-woman show featuring big hair and bigger laughs from Lauren Weedman (Bust, The People’s Republic of Portland). Featuring musical special guests.

LAUREN WEEDMAN DOESN’T LIVE HERE ANYMORE

SUNDAY, MARCH 19 HIP-HOP HAWTHORNE THEATRE ISAIAH RASHAD $15–18, 21+ 7 P.M. Isaiah Rashad has shared the stage with Juicy J, Kendrick Lamar and Schoolboy Q, and comes to Portland in support of his debut album, The Sun’s Tirade.

CABARET MISS KENNEDY’S THEATER OF BURLESQUE + SINFERNO

7 P.M. DANTE’S $15–20, 21+

READING POWELL’S CITY OF SMALLPRESSAPALOOZA BOOKS 7 P.M. FREE, ALL AGES The 10th annual gathering of small press authors will include readings from Diana Kirk, Hannah Pass, Keith Rosson, Sarah Galvin, Chrys Tobey, Christine Shan Shan Hou, Constance Ann Fitzgerald, Amy Temple Harper, James Gendron, Tiffany Scandal, Bobby Eversmann, and Jon-Michael Frank.

COMEDY PORTLAND MERCURY PRESENTS: I, ANONYMOUS

8:30 P.M. SECRET SOCIETY $10–15, 21+

Hosted by Caitlin Wierhauser, the I, Anonymous show gives local comedians questions submitted by readers of the Portland alt-weekly newspaper.

Featuring Shelley McLendon, Becky Braunstein and Mohanad Elshieky.

Portland’s burlesque theme queen opens the legendary Sinferno Cabaret with a revue fusing striptease and comedy.

Hosted by Eric Cash, featuring Danial Brown, Zora Phoenix, Baby Le’Strange, Lily LeFauve and Evie Graham.

FILM

(MULTIPLE SCREEN DATES AND TIMES) 5TH AVENUE CINEMA 7 P.M. AND 9:15 P.M. $4–5; FREE W/PSU ID The last movie of 5th Avenue Cinema’s winter program, the 1953 film centers around what happens when a pickpocket accidentally winds up with government secrets.

PICKUP ON SOUTH STREET

PODCAST ARLENE SCHNITZER SERIAL: SARAH KOENIG CONCERT HALL AND JULIE SNYDER $29.50–100, ALL AGES 8 P.M. Serial is a spin-off of the radio program This American Life and uses long-form journalistic methods to investigate court cases of public interest that are overlooked by mainstream media. The podcast hosts take the audience behind the scenes of the creation of their acclaimed podcast.

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SATURDAY, MARCH 18 FAMILY 2 P.M. ABC FAMILY DANCE HOLOCENE PARTY $5–10, ALL AGES Electronic dance parties for parents and their little people, featuring crafts, a bounce house, face painting, tacos and more. Hot parent-friendly jams by Blackboard Music.

MUSIC 8 P.M. MEAT PUPPETS, THE DOUG FIR LOUNGE MODERN ERA $20, 21+ The iconic band that influenced Kurt Cobain is engaged on a mini-tour of the West Coast.

30% off all in-stock bicycles now through april 30 visit pdx.edu/bikehub for more info

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