MEMORABLE DEPLOYMENT KEEPSAKES
Marine couple's secret to surviving the ups and the downs of military marriage.
FINDING YOUR PERSONAL
JOURNEY
As I put the final touches on the content for this September issue, I am also tackling another large task — packing and prepping for a family trip to Glacier National Park. I leave Virginia for Montana in just a few days to enjoy an end-of-summer family adventure in the mountains.
Going off the grid for a week and unplugging (as much as possible) always satisfies my need to refresh, reset and clear my head before a hectic season of work, school and social schedules begin again. I am counting on hiking, horses, family memories and being surrounded by natural beauty. Putting normal life on pause and getting outdoors in a new place does wonders for my mental health.
This particular excursion was inspired by Navy friends who told me about the wonders of Montana after returning from a recent retreat with The Station Foundation. The nonprofit helps special ops service members reintegrate back into civilian life through bonding trips intended to reset and rebuild. Hearing about how they put mental health first — for their entire family — was inspiring.
Mental health can be a difficult topic, but I hope this issue provides some valuable ideas for finding the right fit for your personal journey. On the following pages we introduce you to Hiatus Ranch of Idaho, where an Army veteran has created a
sanctuary for participants to recharge through equine-assisted therapy, ranch chores and recreation activities while working with a mental health coach.
Looking for a more physical way to relieve stress? One Marine veteran and former UFC fighter is coaching fellow veterans and activeduty service members in mixed martial arts. He describes the fighter’s high — that rush of feel-good chemicals that comes from an all-encompassing physical experience — on page 20.
Marine Maj. Scott Stumbo and his wife, Noel, prefer a more traditional approach to mental health and found a therapist to bring strength to their military marriage. Read about their experience and find some resources to get you started on page 10.
No matter what mental health approach you choose, it’s most important to put yourself first when you feel the need. As for me, wilderness here I come.
Melissa M. Stewart Content EditorChris Adams
Emma Coomey
Nikki Davidson Crystal Kupper
Lizann Lightfoot
Ashley Losoya
Jessica Manfre Peyton Roberts @MilitaryFamiliesMagazine @militaryfamiliesmagazine @MilFamiliesMag
Marine Maj. Scott Stumbo and his wife, Noel Stumbo. Photo by H. Cru Photography, HCruPhotography.com.
Relationship resilience
by Ashley LosoyaMilitary Families Magazine by AmeriForce Media, LLC, is published 10 times a year for active-duty service members, veterans, and their families. Copies are available through participating family service centers, relocation offices, transition offices, base lodges, libraries, daycare centers, MWR activities and other locations by request. Unit requests can be made online at https:// militaryfamilies.com/print-magazines/
Individuals can order a free digital copy of this issue at https://militaryfamilies.com/digital-magazines/ Editorial comments can be emailed to managing.editor@ameriforcemedia.com
Military Families Magazine is published by AmeriForce Media, LLC, Bloomington, Indiana, a private company. Information and advertisements in this publication do not constitute endorsement by any branch of the military or the Department of Defense. No part of this publication may be copied without the express written permission of the publishers. AmeriForce Media, LLC, the publishers, and publisher’s agents make no endorsement of any advertised services or products and none should be inferred.
SEPTEMBER 2022 ISSUE
Turning (many) houses into homes
by Jessica ManfreGold Star children provide input for War on Terrorism memorial
by Teal YostArmy veteran creates Western wellness sanctuary for veterans
by Nikki Davidson
Former UFC fighter trains veterans, local military in art of jiujitsu
by Emma CoomeyEDITORIAL
President and Publisher: Todd Taranto
Managing Editor: Bianca Strzalkowski
Content Editor: Melissa M. Stewart
Associate Editors: Kari Williams and Teal Yost
ADVERTISING
PLEASE CALL 703-337-8100
Vice President, Sales: Julie Miller
Julie.Miller@AmeriForceMedia.com
PRODUCTION
Design: Open Look Business Solutions
Products you’ll need
• Free moving checklist
• TV, phone and internet setup
• Packing and storage (and pet crates too!) Visit
MIL FAM BRIEFS matters
SUICIDE PREVENTION
MILESTONE
EVENT
College football kicks off this month for the three U.S. service academies. In addition to tuning in to cheer on your favorite team, don’t miss our feature on the USAFA Falconry Team. These cadets are responsible for promoting, protecting and rehabilitating the academy’s mascot(s) — there are eight falcons. You’ll find it on www.militaryfamilies.com
Overheard:OVERHEARD
September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. The suicide rate for veterans is 1.5 times higher than that of the general population. In 2007 the VA established the Veterans Crisis Line, a free, confidential, 24-hour hotline for veterans and their families and friends. This summer, the original 1-800 number was replaced by a shorter, easier-to-remember three-digit number. Veterans in need of help can simply dial 988, then press 1. Text and online chat options are also available.
The U.S. Air Force celebrates 75 years on Sept. 18. Originally part of the United States Army Signal Corps, the USAF was established as a separate military branch with the enactment of the National Security Act of 1947. Since that time, American airmen have excelled as they execute the Air Force mission to fly, fight, and win — delivering airpower anytime, anywhere in defense of our nation. Several events are being held to commemorate the Air Force’s 75th anniversary. For details, visit: www.af.mil/About-Us/AF-75thAnniversary/
—Comedian and veteran rights advocate Jon Stewart during a press conference after President Joe Biden signed the PACT Act into law. The bill expands health care benefits to millions of veterans who were exposed to toxic burn bits during their military service.
“I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a situation where people who have already given so much had to fight so hard to get so little,” Stewart said. “I hope we learned a lesson.”
FAVORITES
ONLINE EXCLUSIVE
As the weather cools off, making way for crisp air and cozy bonfires, there’s no question –– fall is the perfect time for camping. And whether in the desert, the mountains or the woods, military families can secure a spot under the stars for free thanks to nonprofits and campsites across the country.
Look for our story on “Wonder-fall and free camping destinations for military families” this month on www.militaryfamilies.com
Resources revealed
If you haven’t heard of the DOD MWR Digital Library, you’re missing out. Access is free for authorized patrons. Resources available include e-books, audio books, streaming music and movies, access to genealogical databases, tutor support, career transition and professional development materials and more. Take advantage of all the new DOD MWR Digital Library has to offer at: www.dodmwrlibraries.org/
GIVEAWAYS
Did you PCS to a completely different part of the country or world? Does your hair and skin seem a little “off”? It’s not surprising. Our hair and skin are influenced by our environment. Cold and dry air hits differently than heat and humidity. That’s why Formulate, one of this month’s #MilitaryFamiliesFavorites, takes geographic location into account when formulating personalized hair and skin products for its customers.
Watch our Instagram page, @militaryfamiliesmagazine, for your chance to win one of two 8-ounce sets of custom Formulate shampoo and conditioner. Plus, from now through the end of the year Military Families Magazine readers can use the code MILITARYFAMILY to get 10% off of their initial order.
Five years ago she took this mindset to the road and began helping other military families by providing room and sometimes entire home makeovers. So where did this long-time television producer and teacher find her passion for design? Military life started it all.
“I love everything about design,” she said. “I love the challenge of creating a space that the family will enjoy and feel comfortable in. Every family’s needs are different and I feel like I play part psychologist in figuring out what will work best for them. I love science and using color therapy concepts to help create a space that works for them. I also really love ‘the find’ — stumbling across a piece I wasn’t planning on but realizing it’s perfect for the space.”
Even in the chaos of it all, Reed said she finds peace in the process.
“I think what I love the most is watching the families’ reactions,” she said. “It’s the best and truth be told, I am a hot mess before the families are there for the reveal of the space. I’m all kinds of panicky.”
Reed shared some simple tips for military families looking to upgrade their spaces and turn houses into homes.
1. Before you buy new, look at what you already have. Change up the layout of the furniture to see what works to create a better flow in the room.
2. Bring in warmth with things like area rugs, blankets and throw pillows.
3. Hang curtains almost to the ceiling, as it helps elongate the space. (Make sure you get the right curtain length. Do not leave a gap at the floor. Curtains should be touching the floor.)
4. Dress up empty walls with art. Create a gallery of your memories and use a large statement piece. A great rule of thumb when hanging larger art is to hang pictures at 56-60 inches from floor to center.
As an Army spouse of 18 years, Maria Reed knows all about the struggles of planting roots in an ever-changing ground. But no matter where her soldier is stationed, she’s all in when creating a home for her family and helping others do the same.
“A house is really a space where we live, but a home is a place where we feel we belong, where we have an emotional attachment. You can say it’s where our heart feels at ease,” she said. “It’s a place of caring and love. For military families, home may be a very difficult word to define since we move so much and
live in many different places.”
Reed has made it her mission to help families create homes through her television show “Moving With The Military” — thanks to a sponsorship from Caliber Home Loans.
“The reason it is important to turn a house into a home is the impact that having that space has on our mental health and overall wellbeing,” Reed said. “As humans we need to feel peace and comfort, and military families live in so much uncertainty that the feel of home is critical.”
5. Feed the human desire to connect with nature by bringing in plants. Having plants in our homes reduces anxiety.
6. Paint, and don’t be afraid to be bold. You can always paint it back.
7. Lastly, if you love it, then it is good design. Tell your story and have fun with it.
Resilience Relationship
Marine couple says therapy is the secret to surviving the ups and the downs of military marriage.
BY ASHLEY LOSOYA
PHOTOS BY H. CRU PHOTOGRAPHY
Maj. Scott Stumbo and his wife, Noel, are much like any other couple, but they’ve found a secret to surviving the inevitable turbulence of military marriage. For the Stumbos, therapy saved their relationship, and they’re encouraging others to seek help sooner rather than later.
Scott and Noel met online nearly a decade ago, long before dating apps came on the scene.
“Before Bumble and Tinder and all of that, I was getting out of the military and was sent back home to Corpus Christi, Texas,” Noel said.
That’s where a friend made her a profile on Match.com, mainly as a friendly joke. As fate would have it, Scott had a profile of his own, and the rest is history.
“He was the only one I talked to and dated; that was it,” Noel said.
After several years of dating, the couple got engaged, enduring long-distance spurts along the way. They got married and settled in at Marine Corps Air Station Miramar, but Scott was perpetually on the move.
“I spent two, six-month deployments in the Middle East, as well as various eight-week detachments to Twentynine Palms over three years,” Scott said.
Unfortunately, the frequent separations started to take a toll. According to Scott, the operational tempo is always a challenge, even with access to Skype or FaceTime.
“It’s great as long as there’s not an expectation that you’re going to be on it two hours a day. There’s just no time for that,” he said.
From there, the couple moved to Marine Corps Base Hawaii in Kaneohe Bay, but for Noel, the separations weren’t the hardest part. Rather, Scott’s homecomings were particularly challenging.
“I had been running the house a certain way,” she said. “When they come back from a deployment, the spouses left behind have started a new normal.”
For some families, reintegration goes smoothly, but for others, it’s a long and arduous process. Scott and Noel noticed that these periods were filled with petty arguments and power struggles that were not normal for them.
“Finally, we were like, ‘This is not us,’” Noel added. “We’re never at each other’s throats like this.”
Therapy as a relationship tool
It wasn’t long before the Stumbos set up a meeting with the chaplain on base, which was Scott’s idea. Noel calls Scott a “numbers guy” because one of his primary motivations was the opportunity to better his marriage for free. Scott admits that he probably wouldn’t have been as proactive about seeking help if he had
to find a counselor in town.
“Pretty much everywhere I’ve been, you have access to a chaplain,” he said. “Take advantage of it.”
While their first few sessions seemed productive, the chaplain on base just wasn’t the right fit, prompting the couple to seek counseling at church. The issue of finding a good fit for therapy is a common one that can instantly turn people off, the couple said, but Scott and Noel both urge people to continue digging.
“A lot of people tend to go to counseling once things get really, really bad. It’s so important to get the help your family needs before those hard conversations come up.”
— Noel Stumbo, Marine spouse
“Different people have different styles in therapy, for better or for worse, and sometimes neither,” Scott said. “Just because the first one didn’t work out doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try again.”
Today, Scott and Noel feel confident in the resources and tools they’ve acquired through months of therapy.
In fact, they’re not in counseling anymore. They currently live in Patuxent River, Maryland, where Scott is in Test Pilot School. But they both credit their strong and communicative marriage to the time they spent in therapy.
“A lot of people tend to go to counseling once things get really, really bad,” Noel said. “It’s so important to get the help your family needs before those hard conversations come up.”
For Scott, therapy was a way to gain a better understanding of how to discuss issues and feelings.
“What is intended to be communicated is never exactly what is communicated, or it’s not how it comes out,” he said. “That’s true for all relationships.”
Scott posed a question for everyone to consider about feeling embarrassed or ashamed to seek therapy.
“Would you rather be thought of as the guy who went to therapy with his wife or the guy who wound up divorced?” he asked.
He added that the health of your family should always be the top priority, not what other people might think or assume.
At the end of the day, the Stumbos say therapy is a tool in their arsenal, rather than a means to an end.
“It’s like going into the doctor for a checkup,” Noel said. “If you have the tools to take care of issues beforehand, you can save yourself a lot of time and heartache in the long run.”
Would you like to find a militaryfocused therapist in your area? Here are a few resources to get the help you need.
Military OneSource is available 24/7 to connect you with expert, confidential counseling, as well as personalized coaching. Call 800-342-9647 or visit www.militaryonesource.mil to schedule an online consultation.
Give an Hour can connect you with nocost, barrier-free mental health care. Visit GiveAnHour.org to search for a provider in your area.
The Military Crisis Line is a free, confidential resource for all service members, including members of the National Guard and reserve and veterans (even if they’re not enrolled in VA benefits or health care). Dial 988, then Press 1 or visit VeteransCrisisLine.net/get-help-now/ military-crisis-line/ to chat online.
MEANINGFUL GIFTS
BY LIZANN LIGHTFOOTSentimental messages: Any message from your heart can bring a smile. Is there a phrase, poem or song lyric that is particularly meaningful? Use a business card-sized love note or an engraved “coin” to inscribe a personal message. You can also write a simple, “I love you,” inside their boots, where they will see it daily.
Photos: Give portable, waterproof images that can be taken anywhere. Order a small flipbook of family photos or laminate favorite shots for your service member to carry in their uniform. A Polaroid fits perfectly into a pocket or a Kevlar helmet.
Trinkets: A small token of your love can be carried as a daily source of inspiration. Would they appreciate a locket with a tiny photo inside? Or a key chain that represents your relationship? They might like a religious
emblem to wear with their dog tags. Whatever you choose, make it personal and meaningful, and purchase a matching trinket for yourself.
High-tech gifts: Technology can make deployment life easier. Consider gifting noise-canceling headphones before the deployment. Or, a Wi-Fi puck gives them the gift of internet anywhere. Spring for a Nintendo Switch with games downloaded, so they can relax. Upload videos from family and friends onto a flash drive, so your service member can hear supportive messages. Other useful gifts include portable charging packs, extra-long cords, battery-powered fans and snacks for their journey.
Cuddle buddy: Matching small stuffed animals can serve as a cute reminder. If you have children — or a childish sense of humor
— it’s fun to pose the toy and take silly pictures throughout the deployment. This can be a great conversation starter while they are away. Not into stuffed toys? Give them a personalized pillowcase instead.
‘Open when’ letters: Give the gift of encouragement with sealed letters to “open when” they are facing specific moments. Popular topics are “Open
When It’s Your Birthday” or “Open
When You Really Miss Me.” Inside the envelope, include any message or small item that might help in that moment, plus waterproof sheets to protect the letters. If you wish there was a stack of “open when” letters written directly to you, read “Open When: Letters of Encouragement for Military Spouses.” Inside, you’ll discover inspiring messages for many challenging moments of military life.
When packing for deployment, consider leaving a gift with your service member — it might be the most precious treasure they bring with them.
to send with a service member
OXYGEN THERAPY
breathes new life into
PTSD and brain injury patients
BY CRYSTAL KUPPERAir Force veteran Brian Cherry couldn’t make it up a single flight of stairs in less than 15 minutes. Three decades of heavy drinking had destroyed his fitness levels and liver. He had experienced homelessness, joblessness and hopelessness. He was dying and wasn’t even sure he minded.
Hugo Frausto, a former Marine sergeant, couldn’t sleep. He often felt angry and depressed, flirting with the idea of suicide. Medication only made things worse, he said. He gave up hope that his life would ever get better.
Then both Cherry’s and Frausto’s health and mindsets completely changed, they said, when they turned to hyperbaric oxygen therapy, or HBOT.
Under pressure
HBOT takes place in a specialized cylindrical chamber, usually in a medical setting. The chamber is pressurized at a higher level than atmospheric pressure, slightly mimicking underwater conditions while patients breathe in medical-grade oxygen. The technology has been around for centuries and is used to treat a wide variety of conditions, including wound healing, scuba diver’s decompression sickness,
infections, burns and carbon monoxide poisoning.
The idea is simple: by providing higherthan-normal amounts of pure oxygen in a controlled environment, damaged, oxygendepleted cells are able to heal more quickly.
Dr. Carol Henricks first learned about HBOT in 2003. As a neurologist, she was intrigued, reading everything available on the topic. Henricks quickly became convinced of its uses for many ailments, including traumatic brain injuries (TBI) and PTSD, two conditions common amongst veterans who commit suicide.
“The brain is a very sophisticated organ, and there are all these different mechanisms of injury,” she said. “That’s why oxygen is so powerful. It activates all the healing mechanisms with the individual cells.”
Henricks serves as the medical director of Healing Arizona Veterans (HAV), a nonprofit dedicated to connecting former military members suffering from TBIs and PTSD to alternative treatments like HBOT. In the last two decades, she has treated more than 200 veterans through HBOT; at least half have come in the past two years alone.
“When veterans come to me, the joke is that they have full medical jackets,” Henricks said. “They bring all these bags of medication and say, ‘I don’t feel good, these pills don’t work.’”
Deep dives
That scenario certainly described Frausto, a two-time combat deployment veteran. VA physicians prescribed several medications for his sleeplessness and depression, but the side effects were taxing.
“The meds caused me to have flat emotions and unable to make connections with my loved ones,” he said. “I would also get really
bad withdrawal symptoms whenever I would miss a dose.”
Frausto’s depression kept worsening, when a marriage counselor suggested HBOT.
“I was desperate for anything that would help me get my life back on track,” Frausto said, and HAV paid for his treatments.
To date, Frausto has spent approximately 85 hours in an HBOT chamber — 80 is typically considered a “full reset.” Each session is called a “dive,” usually an hour at a time. Patients can sleep, talk, doodle, read or daydream during the session.
“I am no longer on any medications and can sleep through the night,” Frausto said.
New hope
VA officials gave HBOT a shot from 2017 to 2021, paying for 27 veterans to undergo hyperbaric dives.
Today, though, HBOT “is not currently part of the standard of care for treatment of mental health conditions at VHA,” a VA spokesman wrote in an email. “HBOT is considered ‘off-label’ treatment for PTSD and TBI
because it is not cleared by the FDA for these conditions.”
Officials there concluded that “HBOT is not an effective treatment for PTSD.”
Cherry, a 46-year-old Air Force veteran, disagrees. He began HBOT treatment in 2020 after Impact Montana, a nonprofit focused on veterans and first responders in the Treasure State, offered to pay. Previously, he saw VA physicians near-weekly. Doctors gave him and his diseased liver mere months to live.
Yet Cherry beat the odds. After his completed HBOT regimen, doctors deemed his liver completely healthy, he said. He currently has a job, a home and a sober bill of health.
“Now, I’m pretty much working darn near 12 to 14 hour-days,” he said. “I’m up at 5 a.m. at the gym, five times a week.”
As often as possible, Cherry preaches to other veterans to get in an HBOT chamber.
“I wish they would realize how truly effective it is,” he said. “Since I’ve been doing HBOT, I’ll bet you the VA people have forgotten who I am because I don’t have to go back anymore.”
GOLD STAR CHILDREN WAR ON TERRORISM provide input for MEMORIAL
BY TEAL YOSTBefore this summer, college students Lilly Hammitt and Kesauna “Kiki” Patterson had never met. Yet, they’re connected by a common bond. Both are Gold Star children whose fathers were killed while serving our country in Operation Iraqi Freedom. Now, they’ll share another connection — providing input on a future war memorial in our nation’s capital.
That opportunity came thanks to their involvement with Freedom Alliance, a charitable organization that provides scholarships to children whose parents were killed or disabled while serving.
The nonprofit has awarded more than $20 million in scholarships. Patterson, a 20-yearold junior at Columbus State University who studies psychology, is just one of many recipients.
Patterson lost her father, Army Staff Sgt. Esau Patterson Jr., in 2004, when she was just 2 years old.
“We were living in Germany at the time, and he got deployed,” Patterson recalled. “He was one of eight soldiers killed when a car pulled up to his unit while they were doing a reconnaissance mission in Baghdad. The driver detonated a bomb.”
Patterson, her brother and mom were left behind. She admits she has no memories of their life as a family of four and only a few pictures.
“I’ll be honest, growing up my mom was doing it all, playing both mom and dad,” she said. “But losing my dad didn’t really bother me until I was in middle and high school, and they had these father-daughter dances. That’s when I felt like I was missing out on something.”
Hammitt, 20, lives in Des Moines, Iowa,
with her mom and brother. She was just 5 years old when her father, Navy Petty Officer 1st Class Joseph Adam McSween, was killed near Kirkuk in northern Iraq when a rocket hit his vehicle on Apr. 6, 2007.
“We were stationed at Whidbey Island, and my bedroom window faced the street. I remember the day the men [CACO team] came; they got out of the car to come to our front door, and they were all wearing fancy uniforms.”
Hammitt recalled that her father and mother knew some risks came with his job as an EOD tech.
“He wanted to go out and do that dangerous job and protect people,” she said.
Patterson and Hammitt were among a dozen Gold Star children (and Freedom Alliance scholarship recipients) treated to a few days in Washington D.C. this summer.
“In addition to the scholarship, we aim to provide mentorship and to connect the students with others who share this unique experience,” said Tom Kilgannon, president of Freedom Alliance.
“Even spending just a few days together, I felt accepted and a part of something by meeting kids my age who were in my same situation,” Patterson said.
“We had fun moments like dinners out as well as more quiet, respectful moments like when we visited Arlington National Cemetery,” Hammitt added.
One of the activities on the agenda was a ruck walk on the National Mall, an opportunity that came when Kilgannon reached out to Michael “Rod” Rodriguez, president and CEO of the Global War on Terrorism Memorial Foundation. The organization recently received congressional approval to construct a memorial dedicated to those who served and sacrificed in America’s longest war.
“I said, ‘We’re bringing our students into town. It might be neat for them to hear about this memorial,’” said Kilgannon.
“It’s a 24-step process to build a national war memorial in Washington D.C.,” Rodriguez said.
The foundation is working on steps nine through 12, including site selection. Rodriguez led the 12 students from the Lincoln Memorial to three potential sites.
“I just remember thinking, ‘Adults are going to ask college kids what they think about this really important thing that’s going to be standing here in Washington D.C. forever?’” said Hammitt.
“A lot of them had similar feedback,” Rodriguez recalled. “They wanted a place of quiet, reflection and healing to honor their parents.”
“There was a real sense of appreciation from
the students to be included in this, to have their voices heard,” said Kilgannon.
The Global War on Terrorism Memorial Foundation hopes to announce its location by the end of 2022 and break ground within the next two years.
“Once it’s built, when they’re able to visit, they’ll be able to look back and say, ‘I was a part of this,’” Kilgannon said.
In the meantime, Patterson and Hammitt move forward with their futures.
Hammitt heads west to Portland, Oregon, to attend chiropractic school, while Patterson plans to follow in her father’s footsteps and join the Army.
“I want to be able to give my time and my service and continue to fight for this country,” she said.
And visiting the memorial honoring their fathers and so many others is a priority for them both.
“I’ll definitely make it there,” Hammitt said. “I’m coming back as often as possible,” Patterson agreed.
For updates on the Global War on Terrorism Memorial, visit GWOTMemorialFoundation.org.
A place to pause
Army veteran creates Western wellness sanctuary for veterans
BY NIKKI DAVIDSONTo be fair, he wasn’t interested in much of anything at the time. Medically retired in 2013 after deploying to Iraq twice, the former Army sergeant had attempted suicide three times. Anger and pain took over his thoughts, which leading to multiple run-ins with the law.
“I was basically running amuck,” said Burnside. “Drugs, alcohol and all kinds of risky things I shouldn’t have been doing.”
When his mother urged him to go on an equine therapy retreat for military members at Higher Ground in Sun Valley, Idaho, he reluctantly agreed.
“I had a poor attitude going out there, and it just changed overnight,” he said. “I absolutely fell in love with the horses and the lifestyle. After that week there, I wanted more.”
A mission to live
Burnside was feeling better than he had in a long time. He chased the sensation, seeking out other equine programs in Idaho and Wyoming while dreaming of a ranch to call his own. During his soul search, he attended more than a dozen wellness retreats for veterans.
As a self-proclaimed “city boy,” Joshua Burnside had no interest in being anywhere near a horse, let alone riding one when he was fresh out of activeduty military service.Former soldier Joshua Burnside with fellow veterans during Hiatus Ranch of Idaho’s inaugural veterans’ program in September 2021.
When a mentor asked him to travel to watch over her ranch for a season, dreams that once felt far away fell into place. When the season ended, the opportunity came to purchase the property. He and his mother went all in to buy it and have never left. Burnside says the ranch saved his life.
“On the days I don’t want to get out of bed, I have to because these animals can’t feed themselves. Even when it’s negative 20 outside or 100 degrees, I still gotta get up and water and feed them,” said Burnside. “Once I get up and move and get around them, they just bring me so much joy.”
He calls his 40-acre space near Shoshone the Hiatus Ranch of Idaho. He has since formed a 501(c)(3) nonprofit meant to give other veterans, active-duty members and first responders in need a “time out” on the property to reflect, refocus, re-energize and return to life. Burnside hopes it will save other lives and reduce the veteran suicide rate.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, veteran suicide-related deaths are up 36% from 2001 to 2019, and the rate is rising faster than the general U.S. population. The agency recorded 130 suicides in the U.S. each day in 2019, and 17 of those lives lost were veterans.
The missing piece
At Hiatus Ranch, up to five participants at a time engage in equine-assisted therapy, ranch chores and recreation activities while working with a mental health coach. The time they spend at the ranch is at their discretion; some stay a weekend, others an entire month. The property is a working ranch with a hay barn, ranch house, indoor riding arena and tents with basic furniture where participants sleep. The people in the program can expect to get dirty. They do daily chores while interacting and helping take care of the animals, which Burnside believes is the most powerful tool.
“Unlike people, they’re non-judgmental,” he said. “You don’t have to try to please them or put on a facade, and you can just be yourself. They pick up on your energy, whatever you’re going through. It’s almost like they can take it from you. I’ve talked to them, and I get that out of my head. Whatever I’m dealing with, I leave it there, and I go on about the day and do whatever else I get to do.”
Ranch volunteer Dejia McNeil agrees that the healing power of the ranch’s animals is unmistakable. She started helping out on the property while performing community
service but liked it so much she hasn’t stopped donating her time. She has family in the military and believes in Burnside’s mission to make the ranch a lifesaving place.
“[Burnside] is a big softy,” said McNeil. “Sometimes, he seems a little rough on the exterior, but he is not. He’s definitely a kindhearted, sweet man. He cares about trying to help others so much, and I’ve never seen anybody with such drive and devotion for what he’s trying to accomplish.”
Big dreams for the future
The program started hosting veterans in the fall of 2021 and continues to grow with small groups of participants. The newest venture is a service dog program, where participants are helping to raise three donated Belgian Malinois dogs to assist local veterans. As time passes, Burnside’s list of hopes and dreams for the ranch continues to evolve.
“A lot of times people have a dream and try at first, and then they get distracted or just kind of give up on it,” said McNeil. “There’s no giving up with him. He’s very devoted to what he’s trying to accomplish and is accomplishing.”
One thing Burnside intends to keep the same is the small capacity for participants, favoring an intimate experience over getting people in and out of the program quickly. The organization is 100% volunteer, with no paid staff positions and funded primarily by donations. His goal is to make a broader impact simply by changing the lives of the people who come to his ranch.
“If you think about it, each person has a mom or dad, most likely a husband or wife or kids,” he said. “So, if they’re going through something, it’s not only affecting them, it’s affecting everybody that’s tied to them.”
Ranch of Idaho, visit HiatusRanch.org.
For more information on
UNARMED COMBAT
Former UFC fighter trains veterans, local military in art of jiujitsu
BY EMMA COOMEYThe windows of Element Academy of Jiu-Jitsu fog with sweat each night as athletes of all ages and backgrounds roll and grapple across a black gym mat, practicing traditional Brazilian jiujitsu moves like heel hooks, armbars and rear naked chokes.
The martial arts gym in Virginia Beach — the city with the second-largest veteran population in the country — is owned and run by a Marine veteran. Professor Mackens Semezier coaches a diverse population of youth, recreational and amateur martial arts practitioners, including many from the local military community. Pilots roll with surface warfare officers; coasties with airmen, and sailors with soldiers. But, they all wear the same uniform here, a gi — the traditional pants and jacket set held closed with a belt.
Semezier served as company squad leader for the Fleet Anti-Terrorism Security Team and forward observer for Operation Iraqi Freedom. After eight years, he was honorably discharged at the rank of sergeant and transitioned into professional mixed martial arts, fighting his way into the UFC octagon. There, he earned an MMA world ranking in the featherweight division, a World Extreme Cagefighting Submission of the Night and a UFC Fight of the Night.
Today, Semezier is a second-degree black belt in Brazilian jiujitsu; teaches weapons classes, combative courses and security training at Joint Expeditionary Base–Little Creek and NAS Oceana at Dam Neck, Virginia Beach; and coaches recreational and amateur fighters.
Semezier credits martial arts with keeping his mind sharp and his energy for life high, in addition to helping him be a good role model for his children and mentor to recreational and amateur fighters in his community, many of whom are active duty, reservists or veterans.
“In its purest form,” Semezier said, “Jiujitsu is unarmed combat.”
But he also believes it can help fill the camaraderie void that service members may experience after separating from the military and mimic the experiences of combat in a safe and controlled environment.
“I am continuously putting myself in some type of danger,” he explained. “It may be controlled danger, but it spikes my testosterone and mental stimulation. It’s a constant up and down.”
He’s describing the fighter’s high — that rush of feel-good chemicals that comes from an all-encompassing physical experience.
Semezier added, “I think when people don’t have that [outlet], they go to extremes to try to fill that gap with some type of dangerous living — driving too fast, drinking too much, hanging out with the wrong people.”
Combat sports can also offer a community, sense of purpose and structure for veterans experiencing emotional upheaval while they transition to civilian life.
But even before that transition, many active-duty service members in the Hampton Roads area spend their free time practicing martial arts. Navy Seaman Lizandro Campos, who practices jiujitsu under Semezier’s coaching, also trains in muay thai (traditional Thai boxing) at the House of Muay Thai in Norfolk, Virginia. As a young seaman in a new city, Campos said defending himself was always in the back of his mind, but it’s also been a stabilizing force as he navigates his early years of service.
“It keeps me out of trouble,” he joked. In the past year, Campos moved from recreational to amateur fighting and holds a 3-1 record in muay thai.
“I love how exciting it is and how deeply rooted it is in Thai culture.”
His gym preaches a Thai mentality known as sabai, a sense of deep relaxation, contentment and stress-free living that, at first glance, seems at odds with the violence of combat sports. The closest English translation might be “everything’s chill” or “keep things simple.” The practice of muay thai is both a physical and mental pursuit, promoting clear thinking, decreased stress levels and improved overall wellness.
Martial arts empowered Campos, one of three service members on the House
of Muay Thai’s amateur fighter team, to develop a strong sense of discipline early in his life and career. He said he’s noticed “something special” about muay thai that attracts service members and that he’s found a “super respectful community.”
Semezier said the appeal of martial arts comes down to this:
“It’s one of those things that gives people an opportunity to have confidence, to walk with their head up in all spaces.”
During the opening session of AMPLIFY, Hiring Our Heroes staff member Adrene Wike welcomed a group of military spouses and shared what to expect.
“This will be two full days of a firehose of information,” she said.
And she was right.
In the two days that followed, Hiring Our Heroes, a program of the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation, ran a jam-packed career development workshop on Zoom for nearly 70 military spouses, its largest cohort yet. Typically offered once a month, either virtually or in person at locations throughout the U.S., AMPLIFY is available at no cost to the military spouses.
The workshop’s informational sessions include professional speaking, networking on LinkedIn, strategic job searches, interview preparation and salary negotiation. Sessions were led by Hiring Our Heroes staff or recruiters from partnering companies.
A resource for all spouses
Wike, deputy director of military spouse programs for Hiring Our Heroes, said she understands the unique struggles of finding and keeping a job as both an Air Force veteran and spouse. She specifically remembers the moment she received a text from her husband about orders to PCS at the same time she was offered a professional position.
“It was so defeating. It was very difficult to find a job at that point as a transitioning service member and military spouse,” she said, recalling the tough job market after the 2008 recession. “My husband was like, ‘We’re going to Texas!’ And I was like, OK, now I’m going to start all over.’”
Wike says AMPLIFY helps military spouses during any stage of their career, whether just starting out, returning to the workforce, pivoting industries or navigating a spouse’s transition away from active-duty service.
“This is a space for you to talk about your career journey no matter where you’re at,” Wike said.
She said that sharing common struggles with other military spouses is an important part of AMPLIFY. Breakout sessions throughout the workshop offer participants opportunities to share their professional journeys and practice their newly crafted elevator pitches.
Every AMPLIFY participant is matched with a mentor, who works one-on-one with the job seeker to brainstorm job search strategies and review resumes. Wike encourages every military spouse to seek out a mentor.
“It’s so important having someone hear you and help you figure out what that next career step might look like,” she said.
During the workshop, military spouses are introduced to additional opportunities run by Hiring Our Heroes. Two programs, the Salesforce Fellowship and Military Spouse Fellowship
Program, pair candidates directly with partner companies in a paid intent-to-hire position.
In-person or virtual?
For attendees trying to decide between the virtual or in-person AMPLIFY formats, Wike said there are advantages to both.
In-person attendees walk away with headshots and are more likely to connect with local spouses and local employers. The virtual session is popular for its flexibility and connects participants with job seekers and employers from across the country.
“The majority of the information shared is the same,” Wike said. “It’s really a matter of, ‘What are you comfortable with?’”
As either a veteran or military family member, everyone on the AMPLIFY team understands the challenges of finding and keeping a job while tied to a service member.
“We pick up and drop our lives into a new community every two to three years,” said Jakob Coombes, manager of events and engagement, who grew up as an Army brat.
Brian Alvarado, Hiring Our Heroes’ director of Military Spouse Programs, is also familiar with career challenges as a veteran Navy spouse. Leading the session on professional speaking, Alvarado cited a 24% to 30% unemployment rate throughout the military spouse community.
“Military spouses are always underselling themselves,” he said. “We have to stop doing that. If you have a skillset, bring it to the table.”
To view a schedule of upcoming AMPLIFY workshops or to register for a session, visit https://www. hiringourheroes.org/career-services/ education-networking/amplify/
MARINE GAMING GROUP
OFFERS COMPETITION, COMMUNITY AND CAREER GUIDANCE
BY CHRISTOPHER ADAMSA
Marine Corps Gaming (MCG) is a gaming community that has brought hundreds of Marines together online.
“It’s really an interconnected community,” said Staff Sgt. Ian Mills, who oversees MCG. “And for [the] Marine Corps, it’s really about resiliency and keeping Marines together and connected. Because when they’re off duty, they’re kind of just like to the wind, doing their own thing.”
When Marines join MCG, they quickly find new friendships and gamers who will
challenge their ambitious nature.
“Gaming at its very core is connective, and Marines are inherently competitive,” said Michael Maggitti, a Marine veteran. “So, I founded Marine Corps Gaming to remove any barriers to entry and unite Marines who share the fighting spirit and passion for competitive gaming.”
Maggitti has moved on to civilian life, but he said his experience with MCG was invaluable.
“Personally, I leveraged my MCG experience into a marketing fellowship with Activision Blizzard’s Call of Duty Endowment as I transitioned out of uniform via the DOD SkillBridge Program.” (SkillBridge matches civilian employment opportunities to specific job training and work experience at the cessation of military duty.)
Let the online games begin
The 500-plus-strong MCG community is a grassroots effort not officially recognized by
the Marine Corps. It was started more than a year ago by Maggitti and Mills, who saw an empty gaming space that needed filling.
“My last years on active duty were spent developing the esports and gaming brand strategy for Marine Corps Recruiting Command,” Maggitti said. “Throughout that journey, I came to realize that there was no organic community for Marines that game to connect with other Marines from around the globe.”
According to Forbes, the Marine Corps was one of the first branches to embrace gaming, partnering with Xbox in 2013. However, internal efforts waned until MCG launched its platform in 2021.
new esports group is helping Marines find camaraderie, professional development and some friendly competition.MCG scrimmaging against Army and Navy during the Armed Forces Esports Championship. The team from MCG picked up the bronze medal at the first Armed Forces Esports Championship held in San Antonio earlier this year.
A litmus test confirming the efficacy of MCG’s platform occurred at the recent inaugural Armed Forces Esports Championship in San Antonio, which featured Halo: Infinite. The Marine Corps placed third, competing against the Army, Air Force, Navy, Space Force and Coast Guard.
“We have a lot of talent inside of the Marine Corps when it comes to esports and gaming ... and these Marines literally took what they were taught in the Marine Corps, applied it to esports and came [out] on top,” Mills said. “I was like, ‘That’s impressive.’”
Besides sharpening gaming skills, there are other benefits to dedicating time to videogame challenges.
“I recently looked at some work Krulak Center is doing,” Mills said. “That’s our wargaming center for the Marine Corps. And they’re already expanding into virtual reality, VR gaming, to teach young officers and senior leaders how to utilize the Marine Air Ground Task Force in new ways.”
Mills explained that the military is now trying to grasp the mechanisms of the electromagnetic (EM) spectrum as they pertain to warfare. Gaming abilities can be useful in this undertaking.
“And the EM spectrum deals with a lot of different remotely-piloted vehicles, a lot of different cyber warfare operators and a bunch of technical skills that we as a Marine Corps don’t have a full capability on yet,” he said. “But with Marine Corps Gaming, these are the people who have those soft skills that are able to translate into our new information operations MOSs.”
Gaming for career guidance
Though gaming is seemingly MCG’s focal point, the community transcends game-skill refinement, warfare preparedness and friendly competition. It opens the door to career paths and offers members emotional support.
“Beyond the act of gaming, actively participating in MCG expands your professional network both in and outside of the Corps,” Maggitti said. “Whether you are looking for career guidance from senior Marines or technical advice from other occupational fields as you consider making a lateral move, those kinds of connections and discussions are happening within the MCG Discord server.”
MCG community discussions aren’t chained
to gaming topics either as many subjects and issues are explored in the community.
“I’ve had Marines just reach out about career advice … I’ve had Marines reach out about mental health issues. Been able to get Marines actual help … to help them with some of the demons they’re fighting,” Mills said. “I’ve had Marines come out and say thank you for helping create some memorable career experiences.”
The staff sergeant gamer would like the MCG community to be officially endorsed
by the Marine Corps because its value and advantages cannot be understated, he said.
“I’m really hopeful that the Marine Corps will recognize the good work that we’re doing. And give us some support and be able to kind of make this thing official. Because I believe that gaming is going to be one of those force multipliers for the Marine Corps.”
Many military families choose to live abroad permanently
BY CRYSTAL KUPPER
The idea came from watching the HGTV show “House Hunters International” and dreaming of living in exotic locations. What was holding them back, they wondered, from leaving the United States behind after their military life ended?
“We decided to take a year off to travel and planned to return to ‘regular life’ in the U.S. after that,” said Stephanie. “But during that year, we realized that living overseas and ‘slow travel’ could be a lot cheaper than living in the U.S.”
Traveling benefits
The Montagues are part of a global community known as expatriates — expats for short — who purposefully leave their native nations for somewhere new, often in pursuit of work or life goals.
According to a VA spokesman, there are 18,473 veterans in the VHA enrollment system currently living overseas. That number doesn’t count spouses, dependents or non-enrolled veterans.
Luckily for military families, government benefits will travel.
“For eligible veterans living or traveling abroad, VA offers medical services through the Foreign Medical Program (FMP),” the spokesman wrote in an email. “Through this program, FMP will pay for health care services, medications and durable medical equipment for service-connected conditions and conditions associated with and held to be aggravating a serviceconnected condition.”
When Lt. Col. Mike Montague retired from the Army in 2015, he and his wife, Stephanie, had a crazy thought: what if they journeyed overseas permanently?
Furthermore, veteran expats “can receive disability compensation, pension, education and training, health care, home loans, insurance, vocational rehabilitation and employment and burial,” the spokesman wrote.
Bon voyage
The Montagues have lived in multiple countries since retiring, currently residing in Spain. They quickly learned that expat life consists of cycles: honeymoon, irritation and acceptance.
“When you first arrive … you’re charmed by all the little quirks of the culture and how it differs from America,” said Stephanie. “But after the initial excitement wears off, I think there’s often a period of frustration when you’re not always in the mood to use Google Translate to figure out whether you’re buying conditioner or body lotion, and some of those charming cultural differences can even become the things that get on your nerves.”
Culture shock certainly hit Air Force Staff Sgt. Antony Lindner when he moved to the Netherlands after leaving active duty in 2000. Stores closed at 7 p.m., and almost none were open on Sundays. Food portions were much smaller than America’s. Even desserts tasted different.
“It was the small, lifestyle things I had to adjust and get used to, and that’s not really that bad
either,” said Lindner. “But after you learn some things, it is not so difficult at all and is actually quite rewarding.”
Army spouse Nadine Venable has also faced some early difficulties when moving abroad. Her American husband became an expat in 2021 when they relocated to her native Germany two years after he left the service. It was a rough time initially, she said, thanks to more stringent COVID-19 pandemic restrictions in Germany than Texas.
“We didn’t have a good experience because it was different than what we hoped for, and we thought about moving back,” Venable said. “It really took at least six months to adjust.”
Stephanie agrees on the transition period, so much so that she started Poppin’ Smoke, a blog about traveling overseas as a military family — including permanently. She regularly writes about expat life, sharing tips like what to do with stateside HHG (you get a free year of storage) and figuring out which countries tax VA or military retirement.
Expat living isn’t for everyone, she said, but it certainly is a wonderful option for the adventurous.
“Over time, you learn to accept and live with any aspects of your adopted home that you don’t like (or, if you realize that they are dealbreakers, you move),” she said. “We’ve loved our expat experiences.”
Use these tips from Stephanie Montague at Poppin’ Smoke to kickstart your journey:
Decide what you’re looking for — temperate climate, language, geographic closeness to family, visa options, child-friendly cultures and more are all factors to consider before shipping off your HHG.
Research — take advantage of online, government and community resources to study your options on residence visas, financial implications, availability of medical care, safety and school options.
Visit — this is the fun part! Get on a plane and go see where you think you could be happy after military life. Consider it a postmilitary recon mission.
Live like a local — when you visit, spend several weeks or months in a rented house or apartment to get a true feel of the area. Don’t be a tourist. Living somewhere is very different than visiting.
Have a backup plan — not everyone is thrilled with expat life. It’s OK to return home after a trial period.
Annual giving campaign needs service members to contribute to success
BY MELISSA M. STEWART
The 2022 Combined Federal Campaign (CFC) kicked off this month with new goals and more enhanced opportunities to give back.
CFC’s annual workplace charity drive, overseen by the Office of Personnel Management (OPM), raised more than $80 million for local, national and international charities in last year’s campaign and $8.6 billion total since it began in 1961. Contributions by federal civilian, postal and military donors during the campaign season support eligible nonprofits — more than 20,000 organizations in categories from civil rights and education to animal welfare and health care.
“Through the annual CFC, members of the federal family demonstrate that our commitment to public service extends far beyond the workplace,” wrote OPM Director Kiran Ahuja in a memo announcing new initiatives for the 2022 solicitation period that began on Sept. 1.
After searching the charity database and selecting a cause, service members can make tax-exempt monetary donations
via an online pledge portal, payroll deduction (the most popular option) or a one-time gift by credit card, debit card or electronic bank transfer until Jan. 14, 2023. If someone is new to the military, or a recently-hired federal employee, they may make a pledge within 30 days of entry on duty if outside of the campaign solicitation period.
Curtis Rumbaugh, the team lead for DOD Voluntary Campaigns, CFC National Capital Area, said the CFC Giving Mobile App allows for immediate donations via smartphone, especially useful during a charity fair or event. New this season, he said, OPM will offer an enhanced Text to Give app that’s more userfriendly.
“We’re hoping that when there’s a disaster people would be able to contribute immediately to an organization helping victims,” Rumbaugh said.
During an extended period of special solicitation in spring
2022, federal employees and retirees gave an additional $670,000 for needs arising from the war in Ukraine.
Rumbaugh said the DOD’s fundraising goal for CFC 2022 is $6.5 million, a 1% increase from last year. Just as important, he says, is a focus on getting more
people to volunteer their time in person.
“If you don’t have the financial means to contribute to charity, if you don’t have a lot of discretionary income available, you can always give your time,” he said. “Many charities are interested in this because they
“From the top brass, you know, through the rank and file, there’s always been this connection to community, and it’s proven through programs like the CFC. So, we look forward to continuing to be the most generous of federal donors this year.”
— Curtis Rumbaugh, team lead for DOD Voluntary Campaigns, CFC National Capital Area
don’t have the labor force that they need to execute all of their programs.”
Interested volunteers can explore charities offering both in-person and virtual opportunities on GiveCFC.org. Federal employees pledged more than 80,000 hours of volunteer service at their favorite CFC-listed charities during the 2021 campaign.
“The thing I love about it is they can also get their families involved,” Rumbaugh said. “They’re more than welcome. And it’s a great way to get your family doing something powerful together, and everybody enjoys the volunteer experience. So, it’s a beautiful thing.”
Whether they are contributing time or money, Rumbaugh said that members of the armed forces and the civilians who support them have always been the biggest contributors to the CFC.
“This is something that me and DOD are very proud of,” he said. “From the top brass, you know, through the rank and file, there’s always been this connection to community, and it’s proven through programs like the CFC. So, we look forward to continuing to be the most generous of federal donors this year.”
For more information on CFC 2022, visit GiveCFC. org. Service members can also follow campaign updates and news via Facebook @ CombinedFederalCampaign and Instagram @cfcgives.
