Being Striked By ‘The Stewie Bum’. Is It True What They Say About a Stew’s Backside? The acquisition of the famed ‘Stewie Bum’, (also referred to as the ‘Stewie Ass’), is a topic that causes much debate and controversy. For those of you who’ve not come across this term before, it simply refers to the, (arguably), ever-burgeoning backside of a Stew, that gradually takes place after joining the industry. Unsurprisingly, this topic causes a fair bit of debate, and unfortunately has been known to ‘strike’ quite a few unsuspecting Stews. It also raises the question as to “How, in such a busy and hectic work environment, does this phenomenon actually occur?” The mystery surrounding this phenomenon is one that is worthy of being sent to ‘The X-Files’, or that’s what we tend to think. Unfortunately, if you break it down, the growing backside of a stew is not as elusive as we’d like it to be, and apparently has many contributors.
7.
1.
Turn Downs.
The Culprits? Turn down chocolates.
The rule of thumb is generally “One for the guest, at least one for me”
4.
The Crew Mess.
The Culprit? The Crew Mess Snack Cupboard.
The Galley.
The Culprits? Interior and exterior stairs. Climbing these stairs day-in and day-out and over using our Gluteus Maximus muscles only contributes to the size of our upper thighs and ‘Stewie Bum’.
5.
The Culprits? The Guests. If the guests finished all their food in the first place then we wouldn’t have to finish it for them.
6.
Its not uncommon for yacht chefs to try and intentionally
It’s impossible to ignore and so str ategically placed that one would think the builders were plotting to increase the ‘Stewie Bum’ when they designed the crew mess.
Repetitive use of the Gluteus Maximus muscles.
3.
2.
Guest LeftOver Food
lure Stews with with delectable, fattening delicacies to watch them gain weight... much to their The Culprits? delight and The chefs and enjoyment, these tactics their delicausually work. cies.
Travel.
The Culprit? New, International Culinary Delights We would be letting ourselves down, as Stews, if we didn’t sample all the new and exciting international foods we come across in our journeys. Afterall, how can we recommend and describe international dishes to guests without having tried them?
Booze.
No explanation required.
Conclusion:
Judging from the case files above the curse of ‘The Stewie Bum’ may not be a mystery, but it certainly feels like a conspiracy! While we may need to practice a little more self control, we are also doing our bit for the planet, in some cases, by reducing waste. Waste not, want not, right? After all, a well fed Stew is a happy Stew!
written by the Talking Stew