Tipp Tatler Issue 185 Feb 2012

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No. 185. Fri. 3rd February, 2012 Tel: 0504-51945 email: info@tipptatler.ie Curraghgraigue, Borrisoleigh, Co. Tipperary. www.tipptatler.ie

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Jokes A bunch of lawyers were sitting around the office playing poker.

"I win!" said Johnson.

Henderson threw down his cards.

"That's it! I've had it! Johnson is cheating!!!"

"How can you tell?" Phillips asked.

"Those aren't the cards I dealt him!"

The businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to his chair before he dropped, exhausted.

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently Henry Ford

His sympathetic wife was right there with a tall cool drink and a comforting word.

"My, you look tired," she said. "You must have had a hard day today. What happened to make you so exhausted?"

"It was terrible," her husband said, "The computer broke down and all of us had to do our own thinking."

of the Internet. Our first move was to access Google, and we told her it could answer any question she had.

Nancy's mother was very skeptical until Nancy said, "It's true, Mom. "Think of something to ask it." As I sat with fingers poised over the keyboard, Nancy's mother thought a minute, then responded, "How is Aunt Helen feeling?"

My friend Nancy and I decided to introduce her elderly mother to the magic

Miss Jones had been giving her secondgrade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron.

Now it was question time, and she asked, "My name begins with the letter 'M' and I pick up things. What am I?" A little boy on the front row proudly said, "You're a mother!"

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The child was a typical four-year-old girl - cute, inquisitive, bright as a new penny.

When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help.

One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional, the reception, etc.

"Now do you understand?" he asked.

"I think so," she said, "is that when mommy came to work for us?"

A Veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor.

The doctor asked her all the usual questions: what were the symptoms, how long had they been occurring, etc..

Suddenly, she interrupted him: "Hey look, I'm a vet - I don't need to ask my patients these kind of questions: I can tell what's wrong just by looking." She smugly added, "Why can't you?"

The doctor nodded, stood back, looked her up and down, quickly wrote out a prescription, handed it to her and said, "There you are. Of course, if that doesn't work, we'll have to have you put to sleep."

A salesman, tired of his job, gave it up to become a policeman.

Several months later, a friend asked him how he liked his new role.

"Well," he replied, "the pay is good and the hours aren't bad, but what I like best is that the customer is always wrong."

My mom is a less than fastidious housekeeper.

One evening my dad returned home from work, walked into the kitchen and teased her, "You know, dear, I can write my name in the dust on the mantelpiece."

Mom turned to him and sweetly replied, "Yes, darling, I know. That's why I married a college graduate."

A woman and her husband interrupted their vacation to go to the dentist. "I want a tooth pulled, and I don't want Novacaine because I'm in a big hurry," the woman said. "Just extract the tooth as quickly as possible, and we'll be on our way."

The dentist was quite impressed.

"You're certainly a courageous woman," he said. "Which tooth is it?"

The woman turned to her husband and said, "Show him your tooth, dear."

A gushy reporter told Jack Nicklaus, "You are spectacular, your name is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your way around the course. What's your secret?"

Nicklaus replied, "The holes are numbered".

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Charity Climb On Kilimanjaro.

Michael O' Connor, Portroe, Nenagh would like to express his thanks to everyone who supported his recent Poker Classic in aid of his charity climb on Kilimanjaro.

The Charities that will benefit from the climb are the North Tipperary Hospice,Crumlins Children hospital and 2 local charities in Tanzania.

He would like to thank the following, John Keith, O' Mahony printers, Templemore road and Tony and Kathleen proprietors of the

Thatched Cottage, Ballycommon for a very enjoyable night. The food was excellent and the facilities were outstanding but most of all to the supporters who came on the night to make it such a success. He would like to extend his gratitude also to the people who bought or sold tickets, donated spot prizes and have contributed in anyway. Also to his family who have been very supportive to him throughout this challenge.

The Tipperary North County Enterprise Board is setting up a panel of Advisers/ Mentors for 2012 and 2013 and is seeking expressions of interest from registered professionals for the provision of mentor support in the following areas :-

Finance Costing/ pricing Business Planning / Cash flows Routes to finance

Marketing Branding & Design Sales and merchandising Marketing Strategies

Legal

Aladin's Magic Carpet Soon To Be Landing In Halla Na Feile!

Employment Contracts/ HRM / I.R. Licence Agreements/ property Corporate

Product Development Intellectual Property/ Patents Copyright etc.

E Commerce/ Website S.E.O. Social Media

Cashel Pantomine Society's production is a show not to missed this February. A production with lots of new talent, under the watchful eye of Liam Molumby (Producer), James McGrath ( Musical Director) and Leah Morrissey (Choeragrapher) and not forgetting of course Anne O'Dwyer ( Children's Choeragrapher). This show has an abundance of talent not to be missed, including the talents of Meagan Purdue, Thomas Grogan and Maria O'

Shaughnessy to name but a few! So keep these dates free 2nd/3rd/5th February @ 8pm €10 adults/€8 students. Matinnees at 2.30pm on Saturday and Sunday only €5. Tickets available to book for 3rd/5th. Also if you wish to treat someone to a ticket to the show why not buy them a panto voucher, this year's new initative!

All tickets and vouchers available at Rossa Pottery, 77 Main Street Cashel, 086-1051899

If you would like to be included on the panel, submit your business profile, Tax Clearance and Insurance Certificate along with a cover letter stating the competencies you would like to work with. A flat rate of €58 per hour will apply which is subject to a limit of €175 per session.

Deadline for receipt of submissions is 5.00p.m Friday 10 February 2012.

Contact the Tipperary North County Enterprise Board, Connolly St., Nenagh. Tel: 06733086, info@tnceb.ie

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Patrick Bombs at the Source

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Did You Know....

The largest diamond ever discovered was the Cullinan Diamond which was found 18 feet underground in South Africa 25th January, 1905. It was 3,106 carats. It was cut into nine large stones and

100 smaller ones. The largest stone is called the Star of Arica 1 and is 530 carats. The three largest stones can be seen in the Tower of London.

Back by huge public demand and following his extensive and supersuccessful Irish tour last June, U.S. writer, director and theatre performer Patrick Combs returns to Ireland with his smash hit one-man show, ‘Man 1 Bank 0’. The show performed at 19 venues in 2011 telling his most fascinating real life story and Combs has been asked to come back with a new extensive tour for 2012 to a further 10 venues in Ireland this March.

‘Man 1, Bank 0’ is Combs’ amazingbut-true story of how he deposited a $95,000 junk-mail cheque into his own bank account and about what happens after his bank cashes the ridiculously large sum of money into his personal bank account. This outrageously funny and dramatic story quickly becomes a staggering David V’s Goliath-like real-life adventure.

Comb’s magnetically interesting show was quickly a ‘smash hit’ in North America & New Zealand So what happens after the bank cash-

es the ridiculous cheque? To name only a few things: angry banking officers threaten Combs with “jail time”, “death” and much more; the incident extracts America’s leading authority on banking out of retirement; ‘Man 1, Bank 0’ explains the astonishing legal twists which ensued after the incident; and worldwide media coverage. If you missed the show the last time now is your opportunity to see this ‘MUST SEE’ performance at the Source Arts Centre, Thurles, on Thursday March 15 at 8.00pm, cost €18. Box Office – (0504) 902 04 | www.thesourceartscentre.ie

Anagrams An anagram, as we all know, is a word or phrase made by transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase. The following examples are quite astounding!

Dormitory - Dirty Room Desperation - A Rope Ends It The Morse Code - Here Come Dots Slot Machines - Cash Lost in 'em Animosity - Is No Amity Mother-in-law - Woman Hitler Snooze Alarms - Alas! No More Z's Alec Guinness - Genuine Class Semolina - Is No Meal A Decimal Point - I'm a Dot in Place The Earthquakes - That Queer Shake Eleven plus two - Twelve plus one Contradiction - Accord not in it The Public Art Galleries - Large Picture Halls, I Bet

Astronomer - Moon Starer This one's amazing: [From Hamlet

by Shakespeare] To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

Becomes: In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero, Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten.

And the grand finale: "That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind." -- Neil A. Armstrong becomes: A thin man ran; makes a large stride; left planet, pins flag on moon! On to Mars!

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Book Review Reamde

Review by Nigel Quinlan

By Neal Stephenson.

It’s rare to find a thriller that clocks in at over a thousand pages, and rarer still to find one that can justify it. Tom Clancy, in his heyday, churned out a few tomes that needed their own forklifts to carry around, but the longer Clancy’s books got, the less readable they were.

Not so with Reamde.

The unpronounceable title is the name on a computer file, a misspelling of Readme, and in this file is a highly contagious virus that takes over your computer and locks all your data in an unbreakable encryption, the key to which is available on the payment of a small ransom. The ransom has to be deposited in a certain area of a virtual world, the setting for the online game T’Rain. The game’s creator, Richard Forthrast, has just hired his niece, Zula, to work for his corporation. Her boyfriend, Peter, is selling some illegally obtained credit card numbers to the Russian mob. The mob’s American connection plays T’Rain. The mob’s data gets locked up by Reamde. The mob want the data back, and fast. Paying the ransom online proves difficult, so the mob grab Zula and Peter, fly to the Chinese city of Xiamen and commence a

hunt for the hacker who created the virus.

Phew. This sounds exhaustive and exhausting, but it’s all set up for what follows and is both fastmoving and entertaining.

What happens next is an explosive gun battle that sparks a small global war as Zula is captured by terrorists and the small group of unlikely friends she has made in Xiamen set out against all odds to rescue her, while her family desperately try to find out what happened to her. The whole thing ends in a lengthy running gun battle in the cold wild wastes of the Canadian-American border.

Despite its length, the pages fly by.

Between the excitement of the action, the dry wit used in describing Richard’s life and times and the globe-hopping descriptions of modern life, there is never a dull moment, and the book can be both hilariously funny, deeply absorbing and incredibly gripping. Highly recommended.

Reamde is available from Sheelagh na Gig bookshop, Cloughjordan, which is open Wed-Thu 10.30am5.30pm, Fri-Sat 10am-6pm and Sunday 1pm-6pm. Tel: 0505 42123; email, info@sheelaghnagig.com; follow us on Twitter @sheelaghnagig; or see us on Facebook.

Contact: Maurice: 086-0537193 Alan: 087-9770178 Visit www.munstersolarpanels.com

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Wanted: Young Bands For Tipp Rally To help celebrate the 100th anniversary of the song 'It's a Long Way To Tipperary' the organisers of this years Tipperary Vintage and Custom Rally are running a Young Band Showcase and would like to invite all young or newly formed bands in the area to come and play at the rally this Easter Sunday, 8th April. All musical genres from rock to trad are welcome and with the larger than ever crowds expected this would the ideal opportunity for groups to show their talent before an appreciative audience. Entry details will be appearing on the Tipp Rally website shortly.

In addition to the music there will be a wonderful display of vintage and custom machinery including classic light aircraft which will compliment Gerry Humphreys aerobatic display which was so popular last year. 2012 also see's the 50th anniversary of the Massey Ferguson 35X, the last in the line of these famous little tractors that revolutionised

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farming throughout the world All types of coal available: Smokeless, Premium, so it's fitting that special tribute Doubles, Singles, & Nuggets is paid to them at the rally with a strong representation in the To discuss your requirements contact Ryan Fuels on farm machinery line up. Last year the Tipp Rally saw the 087-687 3860 introduction of custom and modified vehicles to the show which was immensely popular so they will be back again as will the dog show which has proved Prevent Frozen Pipes this Winter. a great draw in the past and grows each year.

Anywhere un-insulated pipes are out of sight should Model airplanes, bouncy castles, face paintBe protected at low temperatures ing are some of the many other attractions which will keep the family busy along with The Frost watcher is designed for wall mounting in Attics, Pump houses, cold utility rooms. another new item, Archery for everyone so it A Cost Effective solution to protect pipes from the possiis bound to be a fun filled day for all ages. ble damage that may be caused by Full information can be found at ICE and Low Temperatures in winter. www.tipprally.com For further information or other press enquiAlso stockists of infrared heat lamps c/w ries please contact Justin Roberts on 062 Thermostat & Flex & Heat Cable.

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Patrick Hoare & Sons Ltd., 17 Silver St., Nenagh, Co. Tipperary Tel: 067-41000 sales@patrickhoare.ie Find us on Face book. Buy online now or call in to view. We accept PayPal, and all major credit cards.

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Tipperary GAA Scene

By Ger Ryan PRO Senior Football

Rusheen, Borrisoleigh, Co. Tipperary

Phone: 087 410 6868

www.timotrec.com info@timotrec.com

Diamond Dogs is North Tipperary’s newest dog grooming salon. Your prized-pooch will be pampered and preened to the highest standard by groomer Fiona Kelly, who is a full member of the Irish Professional Dog Groomers Association (IPDGA)

To book an appointment please contact:

Located in the centre of Nenagh, within a brand new studio, Diamond Dogs is a full head to paw professional groom tailored to your dog’s specific breed. Services include: health check thorough brushing warm bath blow dry anal glands emptied eyes checked and cleaned hair cut or clip nail trim ears plucked or swabbed parasite check * *

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Commiserations to the Tipperary senior footballers on their 0-13 to 0-6 defeat to Corkin the McGrath Cup final on Sunday last. Thanks are due to Clonmel Commercials club and all others who made the arrangements at Clonmel Sportsfield for the game.Tipperary are back in action next weekend when they travel to Dr. Hyde Park to play Roscommon at 2.30pm on Sunday February 5 in the first round of the Allianz Football League Division 3. Roscommon won promotion from Division 4 last year and Tipperaryare in Division 3 for the second year in a row. This is the twentieth season of Allianz sponsorship of the GAA’s hurling and football leagues, which makes it one of the longest sponsorship arrangements in Irish sport.

Waterford Crystal Cup Senior Hurling Tipperary

will play the University of Limerick in the Waterford Crystal Cup at MacDonaghPark, Nenagh on Saturday next, February 4 at 2pm. Extra time will be played in the event of a draw.

Colm Lyons of Cork will be the referee. The winners will play the winners of theCork v Kerry quarter-final in the semi-final on Sunday February 12. Admission is €5 with under 16s free.

Bhí an-lá ag muintir Scór Thiobraid Árann i gCeapach Choinn ar an Domhnach nuair a ghlac sé chlub ón gcontae páirt i gcraobh na Mumhan. A wonderful day was had by all in Cappaquinn on Sunday last when 6 Tipperary clubs took part in the Munster Finals of Scór na n-Óg. Young people from JK Brackens, Upperchurch Drombane, Loughmore Castleiney, Borris-Ileigh, Templederry Kenyons and Newport represented the county proudly on stage. Bhí an caighdeán thar barr agus dhein na daoine óga seo éacht is gaisce ar stáitse na Mumhan. Tá moladh thar na bearta tuillte acu, ag a dtuistí, ag na moltóirí, ag na traenálaithe, ag an lucht leanúna agus ag Coiste Scór na Mumhan ar fheabhas a gcuid niarrachtaí. Tréaslaimid le bailéad ghrúpa Teampall Uachtar a théann ar aghaidh go Caisleán an Bharraigh agus déanaimid comhghairdeas le na clubanna eile a dhein a seacht ndícheall ag an ócáid agus taispéantas den scoth á chur os ár gcomhair. Congratulations to the Upperchurch Drombane ballad group on qualifying for the All Ireland finals in Castlebar and well done to all of Tipperary’s other representatives on their excellent performances. The captivated audience in Cappaquin certainly witnessed a showpiece of all that is best in Scór. Maith sibh.

County Senior Hurling Relgation Tipperary Clubs Draw Semi-Final Replay The February Clubs Draw will take place on this Friday night February 3 at 10pm sharp in Paddy's Bar, Terryglass.

For those who cannot attend, there will be a live update on Tipp FM at 10.30pm. On the night, Timothy Tierney of Shannon Rovers will be presented with his winning cheque of €15,000 from the last draw and €500 will be presented to Oliver Darcy who was the promoter of the winning ticket. Also, Mary Ryan (Templederry Kenyons GAA) will be presented with her winning cheque of €10,000. The top prizes in Friday night’s draw will be a car, a holiday and a TV. In addition the lotto Challenge Game In Aid Of Breast jackpot numbers will be drawn and Cancer Research there will be numerous cash prizes.

Come along and celebrate Shannon Thanks to all who supported the charity Rovers’ big win. game between Tipperary and Munster at MacDonagh Park Nenagh on Saturday last. Over €7,000 was raised for Breast Annerville Awards By United Sports CancerIreland which was a great tribute Panel to the generosity of those in attendance.

Thanks are also due to both teams, their Congratulations to Connie Cleere from management teams, Munster Council, Nenagh, who won All-Ireland Handball Nenagh Eire Og, Marion Graham and titles at minor, junior and senior level in her colleagues from the GAA Shop in a career that stretched from the late Thurles, Paul Collins from Today FM 1950s to the 1970s, on receiving the and his team, and everybody who Knocknagow Award from the Tipperhelped out in any way with the arrangeary United Sports Panel. Connie rements. ceived the award - which each year is presented to a sportsperson of the past at the Sports Panel's annual function, Scor Na Mumhan which was held at Hotel Minella, ClonThe long-awaited and much debated 2011 county senior hurling semi-final replay between Ballybacon-Grange and Cashel King Cormacs will be played on Sunday next, February 5 at Clonmel Sportsfield at 2pm. Philip Kelly (Ballinahinch) will be the referee and for the avoidance of any doubt or confusion, extra time will be played in the event of the game being a draw. The losers will play Borrisokane in the final in Templemore on Saturday, February 11.

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Tipperary GAA Scene (Continued) mel on Saturday, January 28. It was no surprise that the Tipperary Minor Footballers won the Annerville Gaelic Football award. There was a double success for the team as manager David Power was selected for the Sean Lyons Sports Executive Award. The footballers weren’t the only Tipperary team to win an All-Ireland Minor championship, as the county camogie team did likewise by winning the A title for the first time.

They were also honoured, as were the county U-14 Ladies Footballers who won the All-Ireland championship, also for the first time, when they beat Roscommon in the final. Padraic Maher was the Sports Panel's choice in Hurling. Ballina handballer, Fergal Collins was chosen for his second successive award – and his fourth in total – after completing an All-Ireland double in the U-21 Singles 40 x 20 and 60 x 30 for the second successive year. The awards were sponsored by Bulmers.

Dr. Harty cup semi-finals Good luck to Nenagh CBS for their Dr. Harty Cup Munster Colleges senior hurling semi-final against Ard Scoil Ris of Limerick on Sunday February 5 at Sean TreacyPark, Tipperary Town at 2.30pm. The other semi-final will be an all Waterford affair between De La Salle and Coláistí na nDéise Thiar at Fraher Field, Dungarvan on Saturday, February 4 at 2.30pm.

TAD committee members. Jarlath spoke of the Association’s pride and delight in being able to award the bursaries. CountyChairman, Sean Nugent, also addressed the gathering and praised the great work the Association has done over many years particularly in relation to hosting Tipperary teams playing in All Ireland finals. Seamus Callanan thanked the Association on behalf of the recipients.

Sympathy Tipperary County Board would like to extend its deepest sympathy to the Costigan family of Templetuohy and to the Moyne Templetuohy GAA Club on the tragic death of Martin Costigan in a drowning accident in Australia. Martin played hurling and football with his club at all levels. Out thoughts and prayers are with his parents, Connie and Eileen, and his brothers and sisters at this sad time. Ar dheis Dé go raibh a anam uasal.

MONICA ATELIER

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We wish all the best to the Drom and Inch camogie team for their All Ireland senior club semi-final game against Killimor of Galway at MacDonagh Park, Nenagh on Sunday February 5 at 2pm.

Award Winners

The Coaching and Games Development Committee will be running 4 Go Games Referee courses over the half term break in different venues over the county. Clubs should let their divisional GDA know before February 1 if they have members who would like to do this course. This course is available to any person wishing to referee go-games blitz games during the year. The dates and venues are as follows: Tuesday February 14 - Thurles venue (11.00 am); Wednesday 15 - Nenagh venue (11.00 am); Thursday 16 Tipperary Town venue (11.00 am) and Clonmel venue (2.00 pm).

Monika Milek tel: 067-50657 mob: 085-1231284

Monicaatelier6@gmail.com 6 Lower Sarsfield St., Nenagh

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Good Luck To Drom And Inch Camogie

Tipperary Association Dublin Bursary Go Games Referees Course The Tipperary Association Dublin presented its inaugural Education Bursaries at a function at the Park Avenue, Thurles on Thursday January 26. The Association set up the bursary fund to assist the county’s best young sports people to meet the cost of third level education. Each bursary is worth €500 and the funds are raised through raffle receipts at the Association’s Annual Awards dinner. There were 12 applicants for the bursaries from which the 6 recipients were drawn across 4 sports – hurling, football, camogie and ladies football. The recipients were: hurling – Seamus Callanan (Drom and Inch and LIT), Seamus Hennessy (Kilruane MacDonaghs and NUIG), Padraic Maher (Thurles Sarsfields and UL); football – Aldo Matassa (Clonmel Commercials and LIT); camogie – Nicole Walsh (Borrisoleigh, Toomevara Camogie Club and NUIG) and ladies football – Samantha Lambert (Ardfinnan and UCC). The bursaries were presented by Jarlath Daly, President of the Tipperary Association Dublin who was joined by Liam Myles (Secretary), Pat Ryan (Treasurer), Michael Fenton (former President TAD), Eamonn McGeogh and other

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Tipperary GAA Scene Information concerning all areas in the GAA will appear in this section in the future. If you wish to include any item of interest in future articles, please contact the County Public Relations Officer Ger Ryan at 086-8149146 or via e-mail atpro.tipperary@gaa.ie on or before 3: 0pm on Monday. Visit the Tipperary GAA web site athttp://tipperary.gaa.ie to keep up to date with all the latest news in Tipperary GAA circles.

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Mr Tatler Investigates

Who are the bond holders we are bailing out?

(Originally published on www.golemxiv.co.uk on October 17, 2010 and written by David Malone,Author of the Book ‘The Debt Generation’. He has worked with the BBC andC4. The figuresinvolved will have changed since the article was first published. Nevertheless it still makes for interesting reading) The citizens of Ireland have been forced over the last two years to give the bond holders of Anglo Irish bank 20 billion euros. WHY? The Irish government recently told its people the 20 billion was not enough and they MUST give the same bond holders another 10 to 20 billion euros. WHO are these special people called Bond Holders that must be so carefully protected even at the cost of despoiling a nation?

I tried to find out. I failed. 15th October the British Blogger and former Bond Trader (who uses the name) Guido Fawkes published a list of the bond holders. I would like to thank Mr Fawkes, and thank Unclear for posting the link and bringing it to my attention.

So those are the names but WHO are they? I thought this was something I could help with, to add my contribution to Mr Fawkes’ break-through.

It is worth knowing who the bond holders really are because the Irish government has said more than once that one of the reasons the bond holders had to be protected and could not, must not, be made to suffer any losses, even though it would be PERFECTLY legal to do so, is because the bond holders are pension funds for poor Irish widows and cooperative savings funds for orphans and ‘ordinary folk’.

A little poetic exaggeration there, but only a little.

This ‘widows and orphans’ reason why the Bond holders must not take any loss, was trotted out to bolster an earlier reason that started to wear thin, which was that if Ireland pissed off the bond holders then they would refuse to ever deal with Ireland ever again and Ireland would never be able to borrow ever again, ever, and everyone would die in penury, friendless and cold. That first reason started to look like it might not hold, when the Germans started to talk rather too openly about how it might be best for all, them especially, if Greece did ‘re-structure’ its debts (default on its bond holders – a teeny bit).

When no one said it would be the end for Greece if it defaulted on the mighty bond holders, Ireland’s ‘the sky will fall in’ reason for not asking its bond holders to share the pain started to look like what it was, a politically motivated lie. Thus the grannies and orphans had to be hurriedly wheeled out.

So, are the bond holders widow’s pension funds and orphans’ savings accounts? Well actually, NO. That too was just another lie from the morally degenerate and cringingly servile Irish government.

But don’t take my word for it. Lets look at exactly who the bond holders are.

But first be clear about my method. Over all I have decided to compare Ireland’s wealth with that of its bond holders.

I have looked at what the named companies do – according to their own literature. I have looked to see if they are owned by someone else and if so who and where the companies are registered and based.

And I have looked at the sort of wealth we are talking about. On this last point, I have looked not at their market value – because that, as we all know, is a matter of creative accountancy and is also often not something the companies like to list, but at their ’assets under management’.

Assets under management gives us a view of the total amount of wealth these companies deal with so we can compare it to the total wealth of Ireland. Its GDP. Where a company is, in fact, owned by a larger one, I have used the parent company’s assets on the grounds that on the other side, Anglo Irish

has been treated as a subsidiary of Ireland and the entire wealth of the nation is being deployed and called upon.

So, on one side we have Anglo Irish and its ‘parent company’/owner, Ireland and its ‘bond’ holders the people of Ireland. On the other, we have the com-

panies listed as bond holders and the larger companies who own them and who are thus the ultimate beneficiaries and interested parties in those bonds.

On with the show!

Of the 80 listed companies only 7 listed their business as dealing with pensions and being a coopera-

Mr Tatler Investigates Who are the bond holders we are bailing out? tive savings institution. Of those, only 4 listed churches and unions as their clients, the others could well have been big pension funds. The churches and unions in question were in Germany not Ireland.

Those seven companies are amongst the smallest of Anglo Irish’s bond holders. I only have figures for four of the seven. The largest, Union Investments of Germany, has a mere €165 billion in assets under management.

The total assets under management which I was able to compile from publicly available figures is €20,871,150,000,000. That is an underestimate because the bond holders who turn out to be Private and Swiss banks don’t publish any figures. So Anglo Irish’s ‘bond holders’ hold and invest MORE than 20.8 trillion euros. Guido lists those bond holders as holding between them 4 Billion euros in Anglo Irish bonds.

Now, in my opinion both figures are likely to be wrong. Certainly my figure is a large underestimate.

But taking them at face value Anglo Irish would account for an one 5000th of the total assets being managed by all the bond holders. So would even a total default by Anglo Irish cause that much, let alone systemic, pain and risk? Why are the ‘Bond holders’ and the Irish government so concerned that the Irish people be forced to take the loss and pay the debts for them?

Now lets look at the other side of the equation, at Ireland itself. Well Ireland’s GDP before the crash, in 2008, was … drum roll please… €207 billion. Or 0.207 trillion.

SO…. on one side we have Ireland whose bond holders, its people, have between them a total GDP wealth of 0.207 trillion euros. Who are being FORCED, against their will, to pay Anglo Irish bank’s debts to its bond holders, who between them hold 20.8 Trillion euros. The people of Ireland are paying to, and protecting the wealth and power of, people who have 100 times more wealth!

So where do these wealthy bond holders live and work?

Germany has the most with 15 of the bond holders.

Who between them hold 5.3 trillion euros.

France is next with 10 bond holders. Who have about 4 trillion to keep them warm.

Britain is third with 9 who have around 3 trillion.

The Swiss have 6 but who have about 8.5 trillion.

America has only three and hold only a trillion.

Other nations include, Spain, Belgium, Portugal, Holland Finland, Norway, Sweden, Poland, South Africa and Italy.

All these figures are very rough. The figure for Switzerland is certainly under because Private Swiss Banks just don’t publish figures. What we can say for sure, figures or no figures, is these are not banks investing widow’s pensions or orphan’s pennies.

So who are they? Well many of the bond holders are privately held banks, which list their activities as asset management for off-shore, non-resident and high value individuals. To give you an example, one of the private banks is EFG Bank of Luxembourg. EFG stands for European Financial Group which is the third largest private bank group in Switzerland. It manages over €7.5 trillion in assets. It is ‘mostly’, 40%, owned by Mr Spiro Latsis, son of a Greek shipping magnate. He also owns 30% of Hellenic Petroleum. His personal fortune is estimated to be about $9 Billion.

Now there is absolutely no suggestion that Mr Latsis has ever done anything wrong or illegal. And his holdings are, I am quite sure, perfectly legal and above board. But when we talk of Anglo Irish’s bond holders it is Mr Latsis and those with his sort of

wealth who we are talking about NOT widows and orphans or you and me. It is therefore worth remembering, the next time an Irish politician, or any of our politicians for that matter, say that some welfare payment can no longer be afforded, it is because the money that could have paid for it has been given instaed to the bond holders, people not unlike Mr Latsis.

The Irish people are paying and protecting the interests of people like Mr Latsis over the interests of their own children. And it is their own politicians who have arranged this.

Other bond holders call themselves ‘asset management’ firms. The fifth largest asset management firm in the world is one of the bond holders. Others are insurance companies. The 6th and 9th largest in the world, to be specific. Others are the largest banks, Deutsche, Soc Gen, Barclay’s, PNB Paribas, UniCredit (who don’t appear on the list but own Pioneer Investments) and Wells Fargo (also not on the list but who own European Credit Management). Then there is Goldman. No show without the squid.

Kleinwort Benson Investors is a bond holder. But Kleinwort is owned by a Belgian holding company, RHJ which is part owned by Mr Timothy Collins. Mr Collins also sits on the board of Citigroup. So he too is one of the bond holders the Irish people are ‘helping’.

Finally, a very large number of the banks who are Anglo Irish’s bond holders, are members of something called the Euro Banking Association. All the large European banks, most of the large US ones, Swiss, Japanese, Nordic and some Chinese, are members. The chairperson is Mr Hansjorg Nymphius of Deutsche Bank. Other board members are from JP Morgan Chase, RBS, Bank of Ireland, West LB(bankrupt), BNP Paribas, ABN Ambro, Dexia and Banco Santander.

Its a list which could double as the list of Anglo Irish’s bond holders. The EBA was set up in Paris in 1985, since when it has been and is, central to promoting European Union financial integration and the area’s banking interests. The EBA has close ties to the ECB. I will leave you to digest this disgusting bolus of self serving wealth protection.

The only thing left to say is this. The bond holders of Anglo Irish are a very good guide to the identity of the bond holders of ALL OUR BANKS. The bond holders being protected, in every nation, on the advice of the banks and financial class, are THE BANKS AND THE WEALTHIEST OF THE FINANCIAL CLASS. THEY are screwing YOU! For anyone interested in a very different take on the financial crisis, the failure of the policy of bailing out the banks and what it means for us, the book, The DEBT GENERATION is now finished and shipping.

UPDATE On the question of the veracity of the bond holders list. I have now had word from two people who both claim to have knowledge, one is an insider, and both say it looks correct to them.

Obviously the only way to be sure is to have each company on the list confirm. But short of that I think the confirmations I now have, suggest the list is true.

Though one of them also said it looked like the list was partial with some names missing.

To view the original article visit http://www.golemxiv.co.uk/2010/10/who-are-thebond-holders-we-are-bailing-out/

Heroes?

How often in our humdrum lives do we get an opportunity to become heroes? To throw ourselves in front of the bullet meant for someone else, to dive in front of the oncoming bus and fling a child to safety, or even just to make the long walk to kick the winning point from distance to win an All-Ireland title for your team, or to take the winning pressure-kick in another Heineken Cup game?

The past 15 months have seen many such moments presented to our TDs, those who supposedly represent in Dáil Eireann our best interests.

The vote in December 2010 on accepting the terms of the troika 'bailout' was a pivotal moment in Irish history. If a couple of Fianna Fáil TDs or a couple of Green Party TDs had crossed the line that motion would have been defeated, the bank bondholders would have had to pay the cost of their own mistakes. The government would have fallen, yes, but instead of sinking us all ever deeper in the mire – as they have been doing - the EU and the ECB would have been forced to face the reality of a rapidly deteriorating situation.

Not a one of those Fianna Fáil/Green TDs had the kind of selflessness needed to take that step, however, not a single one would challenge the whip.

Over a year on and we have a new government, but the same old situation exists. Last year we paid out over €7bn in what are failed private bank bonds; this month we're set to pay a further €3bn, next month in excess of another €1bn, €19bn in total this year, €55bn over the next four years. In March, and for the next 15 years and more, we'll be taking €3.1bn from the Irish Exchequer, turning it over to our own Central Bank, who will then destroy it - the infamous 'promissory notes'.

It is crushing us, this additional burden, killing us. Is there a single government TD who will stand up now and say - 'No! Enough!'? In this time of massive national crisis, a time when heroes are needed, do we have anyone on those government benches, front or back, with the courage to sacrifice themselves for their people?

Anyone?

Regards, Diarmuid O'Flynn. thechatteringmagpie14.blogspot.com/

Tipp Tatler

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Ladies Football in Roscrea A meeting will take place on Friday February 17th @ 7pm in Phelans Market Hse, Main St to discuss the possibility of a ladies football club in Roscrea. Anyone interested in seeing Ladies Football return to

Roscrea are encouraged to attend.

Last April a Gaelic4Girls programme was held in the town, which saw girls aged from 9-13 take part in 8weeks of training and concluded with them playing in Croke Park.

North Tipperary Macra na Feirme

All Ireland Camogie Winners Honoured Tipperary County Council held a civic reception on Friday 13th in the Civic Offices Nenagh for the Tipperary Under 16 and Tipperary Minor Camogie teams who both won All Ireland Championships during 2011.

A large crowd of parents, players, officials and dignitaries assembled to see Tipperary Mayor, Micheal Lowry, award the highest honour that North Tipperary County Council can bestow to both teams. The winning captains, Jenny Logue (Under 16 team) and Brid Quin (Minor team) were awarded Tipperary crystal bowls along with a civic scroll each in recognition of their own and their teams’ exceptional achievements in 2011.

The mayor highlighted the importance of their achievement and drew attention to the huge commitment by managers, mentors, players and parents throughout the long campaign to achieve the highest camogie honour

in the country for their age groups.

“Their county had pride in them”, he said, and “they had pride in their county”. Tim Maher, Manager and Maureen Connolly, mentor, along with all the other mentors and selectors, for both the under 16 and Minor teams, were heartily congratulated on their exceptional achievement in bringing two all Ireland wins back to the county.

The chairman of Tipperary Camogie Board, Joe Cahill, thanked the Mayor and Tipperary County Council and he congratulated all the people involved in supporting the teams and the commitment shown in achieving two great national wins. He said we could be assured of the future of Tipperary camogie and he wished all the Tipperary teams the very best of luck in the 2012 season.

Three Beckett Plays To Be Performed At Nenagh Arts Centre The work of Ireland’s Nobel prize-winning playwright Samuel Beckett will be presented in three short plays at Nenagh Arts Centre next Tuesday, 7th February.

Following on from the success of showing three Beckett shorts last year, the Arts Centre in Banba Square brings three new plays that look at human destiny in terms of poignancy, compassion and the necessity of dignity in facing the inevitable. Performing ‘Rockabye’, ‘That Time’ and ‘Rough For Theatre 2’ are the Godot Company with Jim McManus, Aonghus McNamara and Colette Kelly.

A strong streak of Beckett humour is present in the conversational ex-

changes which depict human cruelty and human frailty in equal measures. Beckett’s humour has always been dark and somewhat mischievous and these plays follow that pattern.

The three Beckett works in the programme are approximately thirty minutes each and are different from those noted in the Spring Arts Centre brochure. Tickets are on sale from Nenagh Arts Centre on 067 34400 or online at <http://www.nenagharts.com/> www.nenagharts.com. The show begins at 8 p.m. on Tuesday 7th February.

The county round of the Macra Question Time was hosted by Devil's Bit Macra last Friday in Michael Finn's pub Templemore. Following a hotly contested quiz in front of a full house the team representing the Clodagh Club of Paddy Ryan, Laura Ryan, Martin Ryan and Alan Ryan emerged victorious. They will now go on to the question time final

with 2nd place Devil's Bit; commiserations to the Moyne team who came third by the narrowest of margins.

Upcoming macra events for the week include the meeting of the Clodagh Macra club this Friday at 9pm in the Clodagh Bar. Also Nenagh Macra will be organising a climb of the Devil's Bit this Sunday 5th Feb starting at the square in Templemore at 1.30pm.

Picture shows the winning team at the Devilsbit Macra Club Question Time, Paddy Ryan, Laura Ryan, Question master Sarah Guilfoyle Martin Ryan and Alan Ryan representing Clodagh Macra

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Tipperary County Athletics News National Gold for Evan & Michael The Woodie’s DIY AAI Junior Indoor Championships took place on Sunday 22nd January in Nenagh Indoor Stadium. Both Evan Lynch & Michael Carey did their Club, Clonmel A.C. & County proud when they both captured National titles in their events. Michael gave a great account of himself in the Junior Men's 1500m winning in a time of 4.10.88. Evan showed his champion quality by taking Silver in the Junior Men's 5000m Walk & denying James Treanor, Shercock A.C.(the winner of the 5000m Walk) the double when he surged for the line in the 3000m Walk to win gold in a time of 12.49.43 with Treanor finishing a very close second in 12.49.88. Congratulations to them both on truly great performances.

The Woodie’s DIY AAI Combined Events Indoor Championships & the AAI Indoor Games took place on Saturday 21st January. Congratulations to Brendan Meagher, Nenagh Olympic A.C. who won National Bronze in the Master Mens 35+ Combined Events competition with an overall score of 2178 points.

James Maher, Templemore A.C. also competed well at the Indoor Games in the Men's 400m & 1000m races but was outside the medals.

Moycarkey Coolcroo A.C.

The Woodie’s DIY AAI Masters Indoor Championships took place in Nenagh Indoor Stadium on Sunday 15th January. The Woodie's DIY AAI Master Indoor Championships took place in Nenagh Indoor Stadium on Sunday 15th January. Tipperary athletes competed very well with Martina O'Dwyer, Carrick-On-Suir A.C. winning double gold in the 800m & 3000m & Angela Hogan, Borrisokane A.C. winning gold in the 400m & silver in the 200m. In the Men's events, Tipperary athletes won 19 medals in total (6 gold, 6 silver & 7 bronze). Bernard O'Neill, Clonmel A.C. won 3 medals on the day in the M60 category (gold in LJ, silver in 200m & bronze in 60m) while Tom McGrath, Templemore A.C. won 4 medals in the M55 category (silver in LJ & 400m & bronze in HJ & 200m.

Congratulations to all the Tipperary athletes who took part, especially the medal winners. Full results can be found at www.tipperaryathletics.com.

A full set of fixtures can be found at www.tipperaryathletics.com.

The Entry Forms & Order of Events for the forthcoming County Indoor Championships 2012 can now be found at www.tipperaryathletics.com.

Please note the Closing Date is Tuesday 28th February for U/9 to U/12.

Advertise Online To find out about advertising on our Website www.TippTatler.ie Phone: 0504-51945 or email: info@tipptatler.ie

"Even in the current

Sudoku

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Tipperary from advertising in the Tipp Tatler. We have been advertising in The Tipp Tatler now for over 2

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5 1 2 3 2 8 9 7

Michael Keane Carpentry (see advert on Local Services page)

9 3 8

A full set of fixtures can be found at www.tipperaryathletics.com.

The Club will hold its AGM on Wednesday 25th January 2012 at 8pm in the Community Hall, Two Mile Borris. Election of Officers for 2012 will take place at the meeting & all interested parties are welcome to attend.

The Club will be hosting a Table Quiz on Saturday 11th February in Corcoran’s Lounge, Two Mile Borris at 9pm. €20.00 for a table of 4.

Your support would be greatly appreciated.

For all latest Club news, upcoming events & photos log onto our website at www.moycarkeycoolcrooac.com & mylocalnews.ie.

Find us on Follow us on Twitter @TippTatler “Trying to do business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark.

You know you’re doing it, but no one else does.”

Phone the Tipp TATLER today 0504-51945 or email: info@tipptatler.ie

Prayers 1 5 8

8 4 6

Upcoming Fixtures are below:January Sat 28th – Woodie’s DIY AAI Juvenile Combined Events Championships in Nenagh Indoor Stadium.

Good luck to Daniel Ryan who will be taking part in the Boys U/14 competition.

February Sun 5th – Munster Regional Squad Training Day in Nenagh Indoor Stadium from 10am to 12.30pm for any athlete aged from U/14 (born 1999) to U/20 (born 1993) & their personal coaches. No younger athletes are eligible.

Sun 5th – Woodie’s DIY AAI Juvenile “B” Cross Country Championships in Lough Key, Boyle, Co. Roscommon. Good luck to all our athletes who will be taking part on the day.

Wed 8th – Hurdles Coaching Workshop with Chris Regan in Moyne Pavilion from 7pm to 9pm.

Sat 11th – Munster Juvenile Combined Events Championships & Inter-Club Relays in Nenagh Indoor Stadium.

Sat 12th – County U/13 to Junior Indoor Championships at 12 noon in Nenagh Indoor Stadium. Timetable can be found at www.tipperaryathletics.com.

Wed 15th – Sprints Coaching Workshop with Shane McCormack in Moyne Pavilion from 7pm to 9pm.

Sat 25th & Sun 26th – Munster U/9 to U/13 Indoor Championships in Nenagh Indoor Stadium.

3 2

years and would recommend it to any-

Training for the forthcoming Indoor Season continues every Monday evening from 7pm to 8.15pm in Moyne Pavilion for athletes aged U/9 (born 2004) upwards only & on Thursday evening in Templemore Track from 7pm to 8.15pm for all ages. Charge per session is €2.00 per child or €5.00 per family. Adults who wish to use either facility are also subject to a charge of €2.00 per session.

Win 5 7 €10 6 8 3

Novena to St. Clare Ask St. Clare for three favours, one business and two impossibles; and say nine Hail Marys FOR NINE NIGHTS WITH LIGHTED CANDLE. Pray wether you believe or not. Publish on ninth day.Poweful Novena. May The Sacred Heart of Jesus be praised, adored, glorified and loved today and every day throughout the world, forever. Amen. Your request will be granted no matter how impossible itmay seem. Publication must be promised.J.H.

Novena to the Sacred Heart Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I have asked for many favours.. This time I ask for this special one (mention favour). Take it , dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it. Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour and not mine. Amen. Say 3 days.

Promise publication and favour will be granted. Never know to fail. J.M.

Tipp Tatler

0504-51945

Prayers The Miraculous Prayer – Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked for many favours. This time I ask You this very special one (mention favour). Take it Dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it.

Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3 days, promise publication and favour will be granted. Never known to fail.

M.R. The Miraculous Prayer – Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked for many favours. This time I ask You this very special one (mention favour). Take it Dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it.

Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3 days, promise publication and favour will be granted. Never known to fail.

F.F. The Miraculous Prayer – Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked for many favours. This time I ask You this very special one (mention favour). Take it Dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it.

Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3 days, promise publication and favour will be granted. Never known to fail.

M.H. The Miraculous Prayer – Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked for many favours. This time I ask You this very special one (mention favour). Take it Dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it.

Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3 days, promise publication and favour will be granted. Never known to fail.

E.R. St. Therese of Lisieux O Glorious St. Therese, whom almighty God has raised up to aid and inspire the human family. I implore your miraculous intercession. You are so powerful in obtaining every need of body and spirit from the heart of God. Holy Mother Church proclaims you, Prodigy of Miracles”The Greatest Saint of Modern Times” Now I fervently beseech you to answer my petition. (mention here) to carry out your promise of spending heaven doing good upon earth, of letting fall from heaven a shower of roses. Henceforth dear Little Flower, I will fulfil your plea ‘to be made known everywhere’ and I will never cease to lead others to Jesus, through you, Amen.

St. Therese of the Child Jesus, live in the heart of the church. Pray for me. Say for 9 days and you will receive a flower during or after 9 days, as an indication that your request will be granted. E.R. St. Therese of Lisieux O Glorious St. Therese, whom almighty God has raised up to aid and inspire the human family. I implore your miraculous intercession. You are so powerful in obtaining every need of body and spirit from the heart of God. Holy Mother Church proclaims you, Prodigy of Miracles”The Greatest Saint of Modern Times” Now I fervently beseech you to answer my

Prayers: €7.50 Initials:______ Miraculous Novena Other____________ petition. (mention here) to carry out your promise of spending heaven doing good upon earth, of letting fall from heaven a shower of roses. Henceforth dear Little Flower, I will fulfil your plea ‘to be made known everywhere’ and I will never cease to lead others to Jesus, through you, Amen.

St. Therese of the Child Jesus, live in the heart of the church. Pray for me. Say for 9 days and you will receive a flower during or after 9 days, as an indication that your request will be granted. M.H. The Miraculous Prayer – Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked for many favours. This time I ask You this very special one (mention favour). Take it Dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it.

Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3 days, promise publication and favour will be granted. Never known to fail.

M.S. The Miraculous Prayer – Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked for many favours. This time I ask You this very special one (mention favour). Take it Dear Heart of Jesus and place it within Your own broken heart where Your Father sees it.

Then in His merciful eyes it will become Your favour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3 days, promise publication and favour will be granted. Never known to fail.

B.D.D. St. Therese of Lisieux O Glorious St. Therese, whom almighty God has raised up to aid and inspire the human family. I implore your miraculous intercession. You are so powerful in obtaining every need of body and spirit from the heart of God. Holy Mother Church proclaims you, Prodigy of Miracles”The Greatest Saint of Modern Times” Now I fervently beseech you to answer my petition. (mention here) to carry out your promise of spending heaven doing good upon earth, of letting fall from heaven a shower of roses. Henceforth dear Little Flower, I will fulfil your plea ‘to be made known everywhere’ and I will never cease to lead others to Jesus, through you, Amen.

St. Therese of the Child Jesus, live in the heart of the church. Pray for me. Say for 9 days and you will receive a flower during or after 9 days, as an indication that your request will be granted. B.D.D. Novena to St. Clare Ask St. Clare for three favours, one business and two impossibles; and say nine Hail Marys FOR NINE NIGHTS WITH LIGHTED CANDLE. Pray wether you believe or not. Publish on ninth day.Poweful Novena. May The Sacred Heart of Jesus be praised, adored, glorified and loved today and every day throughout the world, forever. Amen. Your request will be granted no matter how impossible itmay seem. Publication must be promised.B.D.D.

Counselling Depression

(Continued from last issue)

Let us now move on to another type of difference in the context of depression – gender. This is a really interesting area to look at, although more research needs to be done on it. Jon Grant and Marc Potenza are the editors of an excellent (and expensive book) titled Textbook of Men’s Mental health (2007), which is worth reading. It is in the County Library, Thurles. They point out that the mental health of men, in particular, has not been investigated to any great extent. Bearing that in mind, research shows that twice as many women as men suffer from depression, and some writers state that male depression may be represented as a subset of female melancholic and endogenous depression. There is little difference in the rates of depression for men and women in these two subtypes. On the other hand atypical depression is 5 times more common in women. You might like to go back and look at previous articles explaining these types of depression!

Thankfully, the diagnosis for depression in men is increasing, at least as far as the U.S. is concerned. Some writers make a valid point that the greater number of depressed women may be partly due to the fact that women are more likely to come forward for treatment, and more likely to admit to feelings of helplessness and hopelessness than men. The way men are socialised is one reason why men don’t present as often as women for depression. The male way of thinking labels the expression of feeling as vulnerability and therefore of weakness, and this lessens men’s recognition of emotional distress with a consequent failure to seek help. Male thinking also stresses self-reliance, and the failure to solve one’s own problems is seen as a sign of weakness. At one stage there was a stigma attached to depression, particularly in the case of how men think. At one time anti-depressant treatment was unacceptable to many people, who saw it as a shortterm temporary measure, and who experienced a combined stigma of having depression and taking anti-depressants. There was an element of shame attached for those who were ‘suffering from the nerves’.

The most pertinent fact is that depression is diagnosed on the symptoms suffered by women, and I feel that features of depression should now include male symptoms, otherwise depression will not be recognised in men, and therefore will not be treated.

In brief, women, unlike men, may exhibit the criteria for major depression as laid down by the psychiatrists. Jed Diamond, in his book Male Menopause, gives an interesting comparison

By Jim O’Shea

of depression symptoms in male and female: Female depression Blame themselves Feel sad, apathetic, and worthless Feel anxious and scared Avoids conflicts at all costs Always tries to be nice Withdraws when feeling hurt Has trouble with self respect Feels they were born to fail Slowed down and nervous Chronic procrastinator Sleeps too much Feels guilty for what they do Uncomfortable receiving praise Finds it easy to talk about weaknesses Strong fear of success Needs to blend in to feel safe Uses food, friends, and love to self-medicate Believe their problems could be solved only if they could be a better spouse, (co-worker, parent, friend) Constantly wonder ‘am I loveable’?

male Depression Feel others are to blame Feel angry, irritable, and ego inflated Feel suspicious and guarded Creates conflicts Overtly or covertly hostile Attacks when feeling hurt Demands respect from others Feels the world set them up to fail Restless and agitated Compulsive time keeper Sleeps too little Feels ashamed for who they are Frustrated if not praised enough Terrified to talk about weaknesses and doubts Strong fear of failure Need to be top dog to feel safe Uses alcohol, TV, sports, and sex to self -medicate Believe their problems could be solved if their spouse, (co-worker, parent, friend) would treat them better

Constantly wonder ‘am I being loved enough?’

Experiences chest pains, and fatigue Experiences low job enjoyment (highly significant)

Jim O’Shea works as a counsellor from Furze, Thurles. Ph.087-8211009 www.jimoshea.net. Jim O’Shea’s book ‘When a child dies. Footsteps of a Grieving Family’ is published by Veritas. The royalties from this book will go the the Children’s Hospital in Crumlin

Jim O’Shea’s new book called Abuse, about domestic violence, workplace and school bullying is now available on Amazon, published

by Cork University Press and in Bookshops.

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