DIG MAG Summer 2021 by DIG MAG LB

Long Beach

Community

Inspiration

Lifestyle

Summer 2021

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LB INSIDER 05 06

Editor’s Note

Where to Next: Sagewater Spa

Hidden Figures: Bel Canto Books

Dig In: Perfect Picnic & Charcuterie Board 101

Mind Your Health: Online Therapy

Dig Your Look: Y2K Summer Must Haves

Q&A: International Students

FEATURES

BYTheERIKA Bloom Boom 28 PAZ

BYGraduation 37 DENICIA DIXON

Imposter, Who? 32

BYMore than a Festival 38 JOEY HARVEY

The power of plants. It’s teaching us self care, self expression, and most importantly, a sense of community.

BY ERIKA PAZ

You belong here. Stop thinking otherwise. Here’s how.

A poem about a journey to graduation.

Another year of Pride event cancellations leave the queer community re-evaluating the meaning behind the festivities.

INSIDER · EDITOR’S NOTE

SUMMER 2021

DEAR READER, THIS PAST YEAR has been one of the most challenging yet most rewarding. Through my many ventures, I have definitely had a memorable senior year. When I first joined the DIG MAG staff last year, I was not expecting to have grown so much as an individual. Not only that, but I got to work with some of the most talented people I know. I will forever hold these memories close to my heart and I am forever grateful for the experience. It has been such an honor to see the magazine grow as it did. The memory that continues to stand out is actually my first in-person meeting with some of my team members. We were shooting for the first issue we were about to release, and it still amazes me how we were able to pull that out. Flashback to August of 2020, El Dorado Park with an 8 a.m. call time, I was so excited to meet everyone helping out and nervous about putting the set together. From what I remember, it had been a wild ride leading up to the shoot since we decided to go big or go home. With half of my room furniture stuffed into the back of my Honda Element, I just remember the rush of pushing through to execute an amazing product. After jumping through every obstacle possible, I can say we ended up with such a beautiful piece of art. Or should I say, an award-winning piece of art? The fall 2020

issue, being my first issue with DIG, is associated with such positive memories. Bonding moments like that one will forever live in my heart. It is a glimpse of all the fun I had working at DIG. Although it is sad having to graduate, it is a beautiful chapter that allows me to reflect on these past four years at CSULB. I never expected my college years to unravel so beautifully, but I am thankful they did. Once again, the amazing DIG team was able to put together our final issue of the academic year. Cover to cover, this issue highlights some of the amazing work that the team can put together, and I would never expect anything less. As the year comes to an end, only happy thoughts live in my mind, and I will continue to look back at the experience with glee. To my successor, Bella Arnold, enjoy it because time is going to fly by — before you know it, you’re going to be graduating too! Like I would say to myself in my car after we finished a photoshoot, ‘That’s a wrap!’

LOVE ALWAYS,

Alejandro Vazquez (EDITOR-IN-CHIEF)

INSIDER · WHERE TO NEXT

ESCAPE TO SAGEWATER SPA STORY BY NATALIE MALINS

Set between the urban landscape of Los Angeles and Joshua Tree National Park, there is an unassuming getaway that satisfies all ideals of aesthetics and relaxation.

WITH eight rooms that feature stunning views of the desert landscape and the San Jacinto Mountains, the Sagewater Spa and Resort in Desert Hot Springs has drawn visitors since its opening in 1954. These days, the mid-century hotel has become a luxury getaway for both L.A. locals and travelers from afar. Since it’s just off State Route 62, there are many attractions nearby. Hotel guests can take a day trip to Joshua Tree National Park or Palm Springs. All the rooms surround the central star-of-the-show, which is the naturally sourced and heated mineral pool. The

water is sourced from a nearby natural spring, where it heats up to 165 degrees. The resort filters and cools the water and uses it to fill the hot tub and swimming pool. The best part about the resort is that the pool is open 24 hours, meaning visitors have the freedom to swim under the stars. It’s a one-of-a-kind experience to be immersed in warm mineral water under the cold moonlit sky. This getaway’s small size is another plus when it comes to following recommended social distancing because there is enough space for everyone to spread out and share the amazing amenities. Each room comes with a full kitchen, and room rates range from $200 to $250 a night. The resort also allows visitors to call beforehand and schedule any of the several massages and treatments that they offer right in the room. If you’re looking for a place to get away this summer and reconnect with untouched landscapes around you, the Sagewater Spa might be just the place. Sagewater Spa 12689 Eliseo Road, Desert Hot Springs 760-220-1554 sagewaterspa.com

CSULB student Sydney Selby stands beside the Sagewater Spa in Desert Hot Springs during the sunset, Feb. 26, 2021. Photo by Natalie Malins.

CSULB student and writer Natalie Malins relaxes poolside at Sagewater Spa and Resort. Photo by Sydney Selby.

SUMMER 2021

INSIDER · DIG IN

STORY BY REINA ESPARZA PHOTOS BY EMILY CHEN

Creating a picturesque picnic doesn’t have to be difficult with these easy tips. WITH SUMMER just around the corner, many are taking to the beach in order to enjoy some outdoor time while creating moments with people within their bubble and practicing Covid-19 safety guidelines. The beach is a perfect background for a picnic, so here are some tips to get the most out of it:

Have a Seat

Make sure to bring something to spread out to avoid the hot sand. A blanket is always a comfortable choice, preferably an old comforter so there are no worries over any spills. An easier option is a foldable mat since they come with handles or in a little bag to make toting them around easier and lighter. To make the set up a little cozier, bring an extra blanket or a couple of pillows!

Pack Your Bags

The most important part of the picnic is the food. Prior to your picnic, decide on what kind of food you plan to eat. Whether it’s snacks, a meal from home or a takeout lunch from your favorite restaurant, make sure to bring the necessary bags to carry it all. If it’s something smaller and non-perishable, bring a tote bag. For a larger meal and other sides, break out the picnic basket to keep the spirits alive. Make sure to also pack all the necessary beach staples like sunscreen, a towel and some sunglasses to keep the day running smoothly.

SUMMER 2021

Seaside Fine Dining

To liven up your meal and make it fancy, bring some dishware from home or get some affordable ones from a discount store. To make it an experience, pour lemonade into a wine glass or mason jar, eat takeout on a plate with a fun print and take bites of dessert with a gold-plated forks. Not only will the vibe change with the use of dishware, but it also helps reduce the use of single-use plastics on beaches. To organize the food, bring a tray or two. It will help you avoid getting sand all over the place.

Get Creative & Have Fun

Top off the day by including an activity that everyone can partake in. Gather some art supplies and some small canvases and create an on-the-spot art gallery. Or get some adult coloring books and color the stress away. For those interested in a competition, board games can get the competitive spirit out of all attendees. Set the scene by making a collaborative playlist with your friends to have some tunes to jam out to while you enjoy your day by the ocean!

INSIDER · DIG IN

CHARCUTERIE BOARD STORY BY JOHANNA RODRIGUEZ PHOTOS BY EMILY CHEN

Whether you are a millennial or a Gen Z scrolling through TikTok, it’s a high possibility you have come across videos of colorful platters filled to the brim with cheeses, meats, fruits and crackers. Recent trends revolving around charcuterie boards have made everyone want to become a chef.

A CHARCUTERIE board is a fancy term for serving cured meats and cheeses on a board. But modern versions of the board that have gained popularity in the past year include fresh and dried fruits, vegetables, crackers, dips and much more. These boards can become expensive to arrange, but you can make a modern and inexpensive board if you scout the right places. “My little secret, especially if you are balling on a budget: Trader Joe’s is definitely the best place to go to get charcuterie board stuff,” says Emmy Rener, owner of Sophisticated Spreads. “They have small packages, insanely priced, and they have a lot of cool, flavorful items.” Curating a board is simple. Start with your two main ingredients: cheeses and cured meats. Select a variety of cheeses with different flavors, textures, and colors and be adventurous with your choices, but always grab one that everyone will like. A safe bet is cheddar cheese. Repeat the same process with the meats. Lay your cheeses on your board by flavors and layer your meats the same way. You can get more creative with your meats by rolling them, folding them in halves or laying them out like a river stream on your board. Once the main ingredients are all laid out to your liking, you will end up with empty spaces on your board. Fill those up with fresh or dried fruits, vegetables, crackers, dips, or nuts. but pair your items with something that will complement each other. Sarah Simms, co-founder of Lady & Larder, suggests pairing items like

Cheaper Alternatives!

BOARD: A regular cutting board works but if you prefer a designated charcuterie board, check your local Ross, Marshalls or TJ Maxx. CHEESES AND CURED MEATS: Variety packs at Trader Joe’s and Aldi FRUITS/VEGETABLES: 99 cents store, Aldi, Trader Joe’s SPECIALTY CRACKERS/NUTS: Aldi, Trader Joe’s

dates and blue cheese or honey and goat cheese. “There are classic pairings, but we always recommend experimenting to find your favorite pairings,” Simms says. But remember, have fun making your charcuterie board. Move ingredients around as you continue placing other items. There is no right or wrong way to do a charcuterie board.

INSIDER · HIDDEN FIGURES

AN OPEN BOOK STORY BY BELLA ARNOLD PHOTOS BY MARIA BRYAN

Jhoanna Belfer is the owner and founder of Bel Canto Books in Long Beach. Her selection of books reflects her value system and passion for social justice and literature.

JHOANNA BELFER has cherished books for as long as she can remember. Now, Belfer is the owner of Bel Canto Books, an independent bookstore in Long Beach. Bel Canto Books offers a wide range of literature. From children’s books and young adult novels to memoirs and graphic novels, Belfer has worked to write activism into Bel Canto’s story. When she was a child, Belfer savored weekend trips with her sisters to her local mobile library in her hometown, Santa Ana. “I’ve been reading since I could read,” Belfer said. “I’d always have a giant stack of books next to my bed. I’d just roll over, grab a book and start reading.” Belfer is a graduate of the creative writing MFA program at CSULB. Before starting Bel Canto Books, she was a hospitality sales executive. After attending a speech by Ann Patchett, a fellow bookstore owner and the author of the store’s namesake Bel Canto, Belfer felt moved to pursue entrepreneurship. Patchett spoke of the humanizing experience that came with meeting people who prioritized empathy during a politically divisive time. Belfer launched Bel Canto Books in January 2018. The bookstore hails from humble beginnings and started off as a monthly book club and pop-up shop. Belfer would partner with local businesses and bring literature all over Long Beach and Orange County. In May 2019, she left the corporate world to devote herself to Bel Canto Books, full time. Months later, in November 2019, she moved into a space at The Hangout, a

SUMMER 2021 collective shopping experience on Fourth Street in Long Beach. Bel Canto Books married Belfer’s passion for reading and education with her established business skills. “Being a Fillipino-American [and] being a woman, it was really important for me to be someplace where I could connect to people from different backgrounds,” Belfer said. “There is a stereotype of bookstores being a place for highly educated, elite people. It is very important to be someplace where we interact with everyone in the community and that people will feel welcome, regardless of their backgrounds.” Each month, Belfer tailors the featured book selection to reflect the theme she has chosen. She chooses featured books depending on the theme of the month. Belfer has chosen themes like women’s history month, Black history month and American poetry month. Over the summer, Belfer felt an urge to supply the community with books that dealt with issues like white supremacy and racism. When deciding what books to stock, she caters to the community to fill whatever need she has noticed. Belfer is a first-generation immigrant and values the ability to use Bel Canto Books as a platform to educate the community and celebrate diverse narratives. “A lot of it is my personal taste, things that I like and things that I’m excited about,” Belfer said. “What’s been fun is as I get to meet people in the community and meet readers and talk to people I start to develop a sense of what [they] like.”

When the pandemic hit, Bel Canto Books was able to adapt and continue to provide literature to the community. Belfer would often travel door-to-door to deliver orders from patrons looking to fill their time in quarantine with stories. During this time, Bel Canto Books launched “Books Go Mobile.” The program prompted readers to set a budget and answer questions about their favorite stories to read. Based on this information, Belfer personally picks and delivers books based on their preferences. “She is hard-working, diligent and really does have one of the best curated bookstores I’ve ever seen,” said Stephanie Spirovski, creator of House of Rituals at The Hangout. “She has grown gracefully and seamlessly into the boss babe that she is now, always remembering to educate and bring others up along with her.” Going forward, Belfer hopes to empower women around her, “especially women of color.” “If you don’t see [people] who look like you, you don’t think that you could do that,” Belfer said. “I felt like one of my big responsibilities was to model that.”

“ If you don’t see [people] who look like you, you don’t think that you could do that. I felt like one of my big responsibilities was to model that.” — Johanna Belfer

Jhoanna’s Summer Reading Recommendations Legendborn by Tracy Deonn What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding by Kristin Newman Bel Canto by Ann Patchett

INSIDER · MIND YOUR HEALTH

STORY BY JOSEPH TORRES

Figuring out how to get mental health therapy remotely can be challenging and intimidating. Here are some tips for getting the help you need.

GETTING HELP is a difficult task. We first need the motivation to search and ask for help, then the pressure of waiting for an answer is daunting. A lot of people have the misconception that once you find a therapist, you are automatically on the right track. But what matters most is finding the right therapist that is catered to specific needs and communication style.

It’s even harder when you’re trying to navigate the new world of online therapy, brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic. Below, Dr. Christine Ricohermoso-Shiaw, a clinical counselor for the Cal State Long Beach Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS), shares her advice to get started on the search for the right online therapist.

ONLINE THERAPY IS HARD FOR EVERYONE Converting to online therapy has been a difficult transition. Some people feel comfortable behind a computer screen— and it is a convenient situation—but it limits detections a therapist can make. “We miss a lot of that pickup of energy, vibes and body language,” Ricohermoso-Shiaw said. “I think a lot can be hidden in virtual worlds that would be more clear in the office. Overall, I believe we are all doing the best we can given the current situation. I am happy students are coming in for support.” Exploring mental health resources and therapy can be an invaluable experience, especially during society’s current times.

The pandemic has taken a toll on therapists too. They are receiving an overwhelming number of requests for help, so do not get discouraged if replies are infrequent. Reach out to multiple therapists, if necessary. For urgent cases, local warmline numbers are recommended. Scan the QR code for more information.

THERAPY & MENTAL HEALTH ONLINE RESOURCES SCAN WITH YOUR PHONE’S CAMERA TO ACCESS ONLINE RESOURCES

Dr. Christine Ricohermoso-Shiaw is a clinical counselor for Long Beach State’s Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS).

UTILIZE WHAT IS AVAILABLE TO YOU For CSULB students, CAPS offers a chance to explore individual therapy, identify short-term goals, join workshop groups and communicate with other students. Students can call CAPS any day at any time for crisis services, and all services are covered under the student health fee. For those who do not have access to campus resources, health insurance providers also provide different therapy options depending on the situation.

“On the back of every insurance card, there should be a number for ‘behavioral health,’” Ricohermoso-Shiaw said. “When you call behavioral health, they will assess what you’re needing, and they will most likely give you a list of providers that are covered by your insurance company.” Those recommendations then provide a step-by-step process to set up a consultation. Services and co-pay vary depending on the insurance company. 15

INSIDER · MIND YOUR HEALTH

PSYCHOLOGY TODAY AND OTHER RESOURCES “Psychology Today is like a Yelp for psychologists,” Ricohermoso-Shiaw said. “Not all therapists are on there, but a good chunk of therapists are. They provide information about what kind of services they provide, the modality that they use, give you a welcome message, a sense of their personality, a picture and their price range.” Psychology Today allows users to filter therapists by gender, training experience, religious preferences, online therapy availability, specific topics of interest and more. It also allows users to cross-reference their health insurance recommendations with Psychology Today’s listings to find the best match. Those who don’t have health insurance can also search for reduced-cost providers.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness website can help connect users to groups or individual therapy, but make sure to check for local programs. One can call or visit the Long Beach Mental Health Services Adult Clinic for resources. Alternatively, LGBTQ+ centers, Catholic charities, Jewish community centers, and Asian American and Pacific Islander community centers periodically offer lower-cost therapy at their facilities.

! ! ! You know about calling 9-1-1 and 4-1-1, but have you ever called 2-1-1? This free telephone number can help connect you with different resources in your community by pointing you in the direction of help for almost anything, therapy-related or otherwise. For example, you can receive referrals to resources for physical health, mental health, suicide and crisis interventions, housing, utility, food, and employment.

HAVE AN OPEN MIND Some people use therapy as an outlet to vent and unload. That is encouraged and can even be cathartic. However, it is important to be receptive to the guidance given in order to see change within each situation. “The person should be aware that the therapist is there to help them,” Ricohermoso-Shiaw said. “The therapist is there to not judge them. The therapist is not there to give you advice. I think

that’s a common misconception that the therapist is going to tell you how to fix it. The therapist is not going to tell you how to fix it. The therapist is going to help you understand what you may need to do to improve that situation.” Therapists oftentimes assign the patient with tasks in order to improve their situation. In order to see a difference, patients are encouraged to process that information and practice it.

SUMMER 2021

SET A GOAL Upon finding the right fit, April Tsuei, 23, a technical recruiter for Amazon and a University of California, San Diego alumna, identified which therapists didn’t work for her based on what she wanted to get out of the experience. “If you've never had a therapist before, I think you would want to think about: What would a good therapist look like to you and what are you trying to get out of your sessions?” Tsuei said. “Is it trying to work through your trauma? Is it trying to just vent to someone without feeling guilty and without having to censor yourself? Is it trying to understand some mindfulness techniques?"

It is best to begin the journey with a goal in mind, and it is important to be prepared to talk about different experiences that are the driving force for change. Without that, it’s difficult for a therapist to help to their full extent. Ultimately, therapy can provide the help needed for change. It may be challenging online, but with the right mindset and resources, it can make all the difference.

April Tsuei, 23, found the right therapist when she set a goal for her sessions.

INSIDER · DIG YOUR LOOK

PATCHWORK TOPS

SUMMER MUSTHAVES

Patchwork tops have made a big splash on TikTok and Depop. Using pieces of two or more unwanted tops, influencers stitch together a completely new look. It’s a great way to upcycle and make a statement.

STORY BY JACLYN LIM PHOTOS BY EMILY CHEN

Summer is around the corner, and this year, it’s all about the Y2K aesthetics. Here are the hottest looks and must-haves, from head to toe, that you’ll want on hand for those long summer days.

WHERE TO BUY: @liliumorsus, @kore.doko, @jcollectives, @ shannayeh on Depop, Amazon or SHEIN.

FLUFFY BAGS PRICE RANGE: $6 - $12 WHERE TO BUY: Amazon, SHEIN, Yesstyle

CLAW CLIPS

We all need something to keep our hair out of the way and keep us looking picture-perfect. Claw clips are here to give you the effortless hairdo while still looking chic and modern. Just this small statement can really scream fashion if you pair it with the right outfit; comfy, casual or preppy! 18

Influencers who dress in the Y2K aesthetic usually have one of these bags, which come in backpack, baguette style and sling bags. They are usually made with faux fur in zebra prints, leopard prints, brown flower patterns or brown little bear patterns.

PRICE RANGE: $9-$25 WHERE TO BUY: @abbys.bags, @cometbyhaley, Amazon, SHEIN

SUMMER 2021 PRICE RANGE: $3-$25 WHERE TO BUY: Goodwill, Ross, Depop, SHEIN, Yesstyle, Amazon or any local vintage thrift store!

WIDE-LEGGED PANTS

Wide-legged pants are definitely the star of the show! Simple and clean, this vintage style brings out the nostalgic ‘90s vibe and are much more comfortable to wear than skinny jeans. The comeback of this trend provides a new sense of fashion with every outfit. It’s perfect for anyone and you can find them almost anywhere!

PRICE RANGE: $4 - $20 WHERE TO BUY: @jorelynaban, @lemontreebychelsey, @peachparlorco, @madebymeclub on Instagram

BEADED AND RESIN JEWELRY AND CLAY RINGS

The rise of TikTok has led to the start of many new small businesses since the start of the pandemic, several of which make beaded and resin jewelry that can be paired with many different outfits and styles. If you’re feeling artsy, get some beads from your nearest craft store and make them yourself!

INSIDER · DIG YOUR LOOK

THIS WAS OUR FAVORITE LOOK! Which look was your favorite?

SUMMER 2021

INSIDER · Q&A

DEAR

INTERNATIONAL

STUDENTS…. STORY BY JACLYN LIM

ILLUSTRATIONS BY MIJIN KIM

Here’s what you need to know about internship and research opportunities while you’re here on campus.

BEING an international student comes with its own set of challenges surrounding internships and jobs. I speak from personal experience: I’ll be graduating in May as an international student, and I’ve jumped through plenty of hoops to fulfill the requirements of my major.

I asked Xochitl Lopez, the director of CSULB’s international student and scholar services, to walk me through the most important things international students need to know when it comes to internship and research opportunities, so that they can avoid some of the hurdles I faced. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

SUMMER 2021

Q: What are some resources international students can benefit from in terms of financial support? Because they are considered a full-time CSULB student, once an international student is already in the state and studying at our university, they have the opportunity to also try to apply for oncampus scholarships. They can apply for scholarships that don’t require them to be a U.S. citizen and accept international student applications. If there’s an emergency and if something happens, they can qualify to apply for our Basic Needs Program here on campus. If you are a student here, you are not going to be denied those services.

Q: What’s the best way for international students to keep up with any important information or deadlines? We encourage students to use our website as a resource, use our social media and to read their email since, for international students in particular, we send important updates. We know that some students also don’t realize that faculty members and other entities on campus do not specialize in this area, so they might not know the policies for international students. Therefore, we always say, you have to come to us.

INSIDER · Q&A

Q: What is Curricular Practical Training, and what do international students need to do to take part in it? Curricular Practical Training (CPT) is one of the best opportunities any university here in the U.S. and abroad might offer a student. For on-campus opportunities, you do not need permission for field work or for helping faculty members do a project. The reason why you need it for offcampus, even if it’s unpaid or paid, is because for off-campus opportunities, you have a visa that is being monitored by your campus, and we will have to provide the approval. Some international students might forget they have to get approval for these opportunities from the International Office, because the classes are already being offered by their department, faculty members might have approved, or an internship coordinator might have approved it already. An international student can easily forget that they are on a visa, and still need to get permission from our office. If a student does forget and still does the internship opportunity off-campus, it can impact the student’s international status.

Q: If students are applying for Curricular Practical Training, what would be your recommended time frame to apply? The recommended time frame all depends on two things. Number one, first thing you have to do is to be registered fully in the internship already. Number two, it depends on when the internship has to start. With that said, there’s a lot of courses that require field work or an internship in which your faculty or your department has to place you off campus. While you are being placed and given the opportunity, that is when a student can apply for CPT. Its recommended that they do it a minimum of three weeks in advance since our center takes a minimum of 15 business days to process; this doesn’t include the holidays or the weekends. So we want to make sure students have enough time to apply for CPT before they begin their opportunity.

SUMMER 2021

Q: What does an international student need to do to work in the U.S. after they complete their studies? There are some deadlines that we have to follow that coincide with United States Citizenship and Immigration Service (USCIS)’s deadlines. For example, if a student is going to graduate next fall and the last day of the term that the university has noted is Dec. 24, the student must apply for the Optional Practical Training 90 days before their graduation date. A student has to meet those deadlines because if they don’t receive it by that certain window, the USCIS can deny your application and say you no longer qualify since your window of application, based on your I-20 or program end date, is over. These deadlines are very critical because they don’t come from us, they come directly from the USCIS.

Q: What is the best piece of advice you could give to international student preparing to graduate? The biggest thing is to seek advising. Just reminding everyone to not forget that your visa status goes hand-in-hand with your regular student status. We all ask questions every single day, and we are here to support you to make sure you’re meeting visa status and that you graduate. That’s our ultimate goal, that you’re successful in life and you're successful in our university.

Pippi + Lola owners Melissa Balam, left, and Dynelly de Valle have recently opened up one of Long Beach’s newest plant shops. Located on 4th Street, the shop houses an array of plants and accessories. See the story on page 28. MODELS: DYNELLY DE VALLE MELISSA BALAM PHOTO BY: EMILY CHEN ASSISTED BY: ALEJANDRO VAZQUEZ ERIKA PAZ SABRINA GOBATON GABRIELLA GOBATON

FEATURES · BLOOM BOOM

THE BLOOM BOOM STORY BY ERIKA PAZ

The power of plants. It’s teaching us self care, self expression, and most importantly, a sense of community.

The bloom boom is officially in full flower in Long Beach. It’s been growing for a few years now, but it truly went viral during the pandemic. Along with roller skating and sourdough bread baking, plant parenting became an oasis for many who were stuck at home. But for people of color and the queer community, the plant trend is providing more than just a hobby, it has become an invitation for self care, selfexpression and important conversations. In less than six months, Long Beach has seen the opening of two POC, queer-owned plant shops; Plantiitas, by owners Kevin Alcaraz and Anthony Diaz, who opened their store in October 2020; Pippi + Lola, opened in February 2021 by Dynelly Del Valle; and most recently, another shop in Bixby Knolls, Plants By Yours Truly, owned by Melissa Murillo. All three join the already thriving plant community in Long Beach. “So many people come in and they start chit chatting with us. It starts off as, ‘I’m not very good with plants, but…’ and then all of a sudden we’re talking about trans rights. It gets really deep, real quick,” Del Valle said. Pippi + Lola officially opened on Valentine’s Day. Del Valle, who describes herself as forever 25 and Puerto Rican by blood, is happy that her plant studio u

Pippi + Lola owners Melissa Balam, left, and Dynelly de Valle open their doors on Feb. 14, 2021 in Long Beach. Photo by Emily Chen

Dynelly Del Valle, owner of Pippi + Lola, has curated an enviorment that is more than just a plant shop, it’s a plant oasis. Photo by Emily Chen

SUMMER 2021

is providing a safe space for her fellow LGBTQ+ and POC communities. To her, plants are much more than house decor. “I feel like the reason why a lot of people have gotten interested in plants during this pandemic is because it’s an avenue to self care. It’s a little therapeutic, it’s how you dedicate time to yourself and your plants,” Del Valle said. “Are they getting enough water? Are they getting enough nutrients? Are they getting enough sunlight? Those are all things that we do for our own bodies.” Gardening and plant care as a way to live a better life is not news. Sure, plants help clean the air in your home and make your home look inviting, but research also shows that plants help reduce anxiety, help with depression, and improve concentration and productivity. You don’t need to spend all day in your garden, either. A study published by the Sichuan Agricultural University in 2018 showed that contact with plants for as little as 15 minutes is enough to reduce blood pressure, promote relaxation and lower anxiety. So if plant care as self care is not a new concept, why did it take this long to see some diversity in the plant community? Courtney Warwick, 36, who has been a Long Beach resident for 17 years, found herself becoming a plantfuencer—that’s a plant influencer, for the uninitiated— shortly after she discovered her love for plants. Before the pandemic, plants had never interested Warwick. She had received a spider plant as a gift years before, but the plant died and her interest in plants never grew. Plants weren’t popular with her friends either. They just weren’t a part of her life. But when the stay-at-home order took effect, she spent a week at her parents’ home, and her love for plants first sparked. “My mom has this window in her house and she kept all these plants there...And I just, it never drew me in like that. But literally, that week I was looking at them and I was like, ‘I really want some plants now.’ It was so random,” Warwick said. “As soon as I left her house, I went to Trader Joe’s and bought a rubber plant and a palm.” 29

FEATURES · BLOOM BOOM

Her plant collection quickly grew, so she decided to start an Instagram page. Her sister, Lauren Levi, helped her come up with her Instagram name, @blkgirlgrnthumb. “I felt like [the account] took off pretty quickly. But I think what really made it hit is when the unfortunate death of George Floyd happened,” Warwick said. “It just ended up being hundreds of Caucasian supporters supporting people of color. And literally overnight, no lie, I got like 2,000 followers.” The months after George Floyd’s murder led to an influx of support for Black creatives. Hashtags like #supportblackownedbusinesses and #blacklivesmatter started trending on all social media platforms, giving a renewed exposure to the online Black community. The support was so great, that it changed how much Black creators earn through social media. IZEA Worldwide, an influencer marketing company, published their State of Influencer Equality report in January of this year. The report looks at data for the last five years and it focuses on influencer earnings by race, gender, age and language. In 2015, Black influencers were paid on average $129 per post. In 2020, the average was $1,773. According to the report, Black influencers, compared to white, Hispanic, Asian and other nonwhite influencers, earned the most per post in 2020 for the first time. Ever.

Plantfluencer Courtney Warwick’s advice for anyone wanting to start something new: “Everybody has their own path, everybody has their own journey. You let your plants grow, let your ideas grow too.” Photos courtesy of Courtney Warwick

SUMMER 2021

The rise in popularity of Black influencers meant that more people of color were able to find people they could relate to sharing interests that they had never considered before. “I actually started the page to seek out people like me,” Warwick said. “I only started watching [plant] videos when I found someone like me. When I came across Hilton Carter.” Hilton Carter is an artist, filmmaker, stylist and a plant daddy. He is known as The Plant Doctor on YouTube, and was one of the few non-white plant parents who was popular before 2020. “When I found him and saw he makes videos, I was like, ‘Tight!’ This is what I needed,” Warwick said. Her whole life, Warwick has always looked for relatability in her interests, including the he shows that she watches, the books that she reads, the stores where she shops. So when she found Carter, she found a way to relate her experience with the plant community. That relatability has driven her online growth and her side hustle. As Warwick’s following grew, so did her ideas for @blkgirlgrnthumb. Her other interests have naturally made their way into her plant page. Photos of some of her favorite artists like, Tupac Shakur, Kendrick Lamar and Nipsey Hussle, regularly make background appearances on her feed. Her signature slogan, “I Rap To My Plants,” has become the centerpiece of her merchandise. The merchandise has made its way into plant shops across the country, including her local Long Beach plant shop, Plantiitas. As the Long Beach queer and POC plant community grows online and IRL, so has its impact on those involved. “I’m grateful for finding my love for plants because I feel like it has helped me grow as a person. That’s something that I was lacking,” Warwick said. “You know when you’re lacking something or when you’re missing something? And literally since then, I’ve been good.” She continued.

“I want to show that [plants are] self care for me. This is what I do, This is what I like to do. My end goal is to open a mobile plant shop. I don’t know how the hell I’m going to do it, but that’s something I really, really, really want to do.” Del Valle, focusing on the intersectionality between plants, self care, safe space and equity, wants to continue having these important conversations. “The issues have never not been there, It’s just that it’s been in the dark. People have only been able to talk about it among each other. And now we have voices and platforms that we can speak out to everyone,” she said. “We have these platforms, just like the studio is a platform for us. Why not speak up? Why not talk about the things that are important to us? Why not build a community and bring that together?” “My store is little, but we’ve got big voices and I think that’s a good start. I just want to be part of something bigger and help in any way.”

“ I’m grateful for finding my love for plants because I feel like it has helped me grow as a person. That’s something that I was lacking.” — Courtney Warwick

FEATURES · IMPOSTER, WHO?

IMPOSTOR,

WHO?

IMP

WHO?

SUMMER 2021

POSTOR,

WHO? STORY BY ERIKA PAZ PHOTOS BY EMILY CHEN

You belong here. Stop thinking otherwise. Here’s how.

Deep inside, I believed that the shame from possible failure was much worse than the regret from not trying at all.

A few months ago, I got a message from one of my professors. It was an invitation to apply to a prestigious internship. My first thought was, Why do they think I’m good enough to apply for this? Don’t they know I actually have no idea what I’m doing? After a few moments of trying to find a way to politely say ‘no thank you,’ I eventually responded. “The idea of applying to something like this terrifies me. I don’t think I would have ever even considered applying to it.” “We all have impostor syndrome to push through, but I assure you that you are in this league,” they said. I have experienced impostor syndrome my whole life, but in that moment, it became painfully clear how much I had let it affect my life. I had spent so much time and energy doubting myself, that the mere thought of failing was enough to stop me from trying. Deep inside, I believed that the shame from possible failure was much worse than the regret from not trying at all. Impostor feelings that go unchecked can cause us to cope in a variety of ways, including avoidance. Some of us try to fly under the radar, keeping to ourselves so we don’t garner any attention and risk being exposed.

IMPOS

WHO Some of us over prepare— excessively—because we believe we have to make up for what we think is our own ineptitude. Some of us chronically procrastinate, setting ourselves up for failure that reinforces our beliefs. Some of us self-sabotage by constantly changing majors, showing up late to an interview, or engaging in substance abuse. And then, there are some of us who never finish, or never start, that job application, that art project, or that personal statement. If we never start or finish, no one can judge us on the result. At the very least, all of these coping mechanisms make life more difficult. At their worst, they can cause serious life repercussions. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Valerie Young, author, public speaker, and impostor syndrome expert, gave us some advice on how to change our perspective so that we don’t let impostor feelings get in the way of our success. 33

FEATURES · IMPOSTER, WHO?

WHAT IS IMPOSTOR SYNDROME?

“ We have these feelings despite evidence of the contrary, evidence of our accomplishments and abilities.” 34

So what exactly are we talking about here? To start off, the official term is impostor phenomenon, but it is also known as impostorism, or impostor experience. “It’s the belief, often unconscious, that deep down, we’re really not as intelligent, capable, competent, talented as other people think we are,” Young said. “We have these feelings despite evidence of the contrary, evidence of our accomplishments and abilities.” She continued to say that selfbelieved impostors diminish or dismiss their accomplishments by attributing them to outside factors. Maybe someone helped you get that job or internship. Or maybe you were in the right place at the

right time. Or you were just plain lucky to get that good grade. The belief that we didn’t earn our accomplishments leads to the fear that someone will find us out. But it’s not always about accomplishments. “When you’re one of the few, or the only, or the first to do something, you’ve got that kind of pressure to represent your entire group,” Young said. The pressure to not fail can be even higher for women, people of color, and people with disabilities. International students also have to navigate these experiences, but in a language and culture different from their own, adding an additional layer of pressure.

SUMMER 2021

WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT? We’ve established why we experience impostor syndrome—deep beliefs that we aren’t good enough, sometimes accompanied by societal pressure to represent an entire group. We know that it can manifest itself in overpreparing, flying under the radar, self sabotage, among others. But how do we fix it? Is it possible to get over it? Will the feeling ever go away? Young says there are three steps to minimizing imposter syndrome: Normalize it, understand your situation, and keep going.

Normalize Like many other experiences that have stigma attached to it, one of the first steps in making progress is being able to identify those feelings of impostorism when they are occurring and then share them with someone. Often, we think we have a unique experience and that nobody understands how we feel. According to Young, up to 70% of people have these feelings to different degrees at one time or another. Knowing that your classmate or your professor have also had this experience allows us to realize that we are experiencing something absolutely normal. “It’s a really important first step,” Young said. “But it’s just a first step. Sometimes we can get stuck in endlessly talking about our supposed ineptness and we never move the needle.” Young believes that just talking about it won’t help unless we also actively work on changing our frame of mind. “The only way to stop feeling like an impostor is to stop thinking like an impostor,” she said.

Understand the Situation How do we stop thinking like an impostor? Young made sure to point out how normal it is to feel anxious, worried, and nervous about being in certain situations. Learning something new, giving a presentation, taking an exam, interviewing for a job, starting a project —the list goes on. The important thing is to understand that everyone has the potential to feel this way, including people who don’t experience impostorism. For them, the difference is in how they think about the situation. They are no more intelligent, capable, or competent than the rest of us, they’re just thinking different thoughts. “They think differently about competence and what it means to be competent,” Young said. “They think and respond differently to failure, mistakes, and constructive criticism. And they think differently about fear.” “Once you understand that, when you have a normal impostor moment, hit the pause button. Become consciously aware of, ‘What is the conversation going on in my head?’ and see if you can reframe it the way somebody who doesn’t feel like an impostor would.” So when you find yourself in an impostor moment, notice how you are talking to yourself. Change the conversation from “everyone will know I don’t know what I’m doing,” to “I’ve never done this before, but I am capable of figuring it.” You can also think about it, Young said, like a sports match, in which someone will win and someone will lose. “The person who loses, you could be crying on the bench, but as long as you gave it your best shot, you studied hard, you didn’t procrastinate, then there’s nothing to be ashamed about.” Young said. “You can be disappointed, but not ashamed.” “Athletes don’t just hang up their uniform and go home when they lose a game. They go get coaching, they watch the game tape, they figure out what went wrong. They try harder, and then they say, ‘We’ll get them next time.’”

“ Athletes don’t just hang up their uniform and go home when they lose a game. They go get coaching, they watch the game tape, they figure out what went wrong. They try harder, and then they say, ‘We’ll get them next time.’” — Valeria Young

INSIDER · STORY

Keep Going, Regardless of How You Feel “The last step is to keep going, regardless of how you feel,” Young said. Sometimes we want to feel 100% confident before we begin something new. Or we want to wait until we don’t feel like impostors before we apply for that job. Or we want to feel like we belong before we voice our opinion. “The reality is, that’s not how it works. Feelings are the last to change,” she said. As Young mentioned, in order to change those feelings, we need to change our thoughts. So it’s important to continue with our work, continue to try new things, and continue to take a chance, regardless of how we feel. “The goal is not to never feel like an impostor, [the goal is] to be able to have the tools and the insight and the information to be able to talk yourself down faster,” Young said. And even if you fail, Young insists that you have to keep going. Failure is normal and it happens to everyone. The key is to change how you see your own failure. Take it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Take it as a second chance to try a different approach. 36

At the very least, see it as an interesting experience of which you can tell fun stories in the future. “It’s about shooting high,” Young said. Personally, I am still waiting to hear back from that prestigious internship. I have no idea if it will work out for me or not, but I feel better knowing that I at least gave it a shot. And even if I don’t get the outcome I would like, I am still learning something from the experience. I am learning to get out of my own way by challenging my thoughts of doubt regardless of how they make me feel. I am learning that there is no shame in failure, that I deserve to give myself credit for my accomplishments, and that I am not alone in this experience. I am learning that even if I keep feeling like I don’t belong, I have the power to change that frame of mind and overcome my self doubt. I am learning that I am here today because I earned my accomplishments. I am learning that I belong here because there is no place where I don’t belong. I am learning that I am good enough. And so are you. We all are.

So it’s important to continue with our work, continue to try new things, and continue to take a chance, regardless of how we feel.

SUMMER 2021

GRADUATION BY DENICIA DIXON

Graduation, Once far away, The thought of having a degree one day. the ride to get here, I wasn’t driving out of my control, my home was spiraling Drugs would roam, And so would my mother Like alice she wondered We all split and sundered Is this all life could be? Mishap expectancies. I knew it wasn’t, Curious me, just had to see College set me free To learn and grow like a rose itself, Soft and easy. That’s how life finally felt Like a cloud in the wind, Crusin’ thru the breeze I found a free me, ready to be-Ready to bloom, and graduate. Now, in that black n’ yellow cap n’ gown Take on the world, Be your most vulnerable self You did it girl! Put that degree on the shelf ! Graduation, That sounds so sweet. On the tip of my tongue, like a word hard to speak. Oh joy it will bring when ‘Congratulations’ ring Class of ‘21, We cheer, we sing!

ILLUSTRATIONS BY MIJIN KIM

FEATURES · MORE THAN A FESTIVAL

MORE THAN A FESTIVAL

Los Angeles Pride in 2018.

Photo courtesy of Zea Huizar

SUMMER 2021

Long Beach Pride in 1994. Photo courtesy of USC Library.

STORY BY JOEY HARVEY

Another year of Pride event cancellations leave the queer community re-evaluating the meaning behind the festivities. IN A CROWD of people along the curbside of Santa Monica Boulevard there wasn’t a single frown in sight. Everyone was happy, and nothing but cheers and applause could be heard as decorative parade floats of every color imaginable slowly made their way down the street. People marched with rainbow flags in their hands as they waved back to the cheering crowds. It was as if glitter had fallen from the air and into the crowd of that year’s Los Angeles LGBTQ+ Pride parade. However, due to COVID-19 and with the concerns of the health and safety of attendees, many of last year’s LGBTQ+ Pride festivities were canceled, postponed, or converted to online platforms. According to information provided by the European Pride Organizers Association, over 400 Pride events globally had committed those cancelations or changes in response to COVID-19. Though some were left disappointed of last year’s cancellations, many queeridentifying individuals realized that

there is much more to the message and meaning behind Pride than the scheduled summer month festivities. In an open letter to the public regarding last year’s festivities, the communications team of Los Angeles Pride, Christopher Street West Association, expressed their reasons for postponing their highly attended Pride festivities. “We understand that you’re disappointed. But please try to see the silver lining in the gravity of this decision: we’re ultimately doing what’s best for our community as a whole,” the Association stated. They later reiterated that though the festivities would not be going forward, gay pride and gay liberation are a daily occurrence for queer folks. The meaning behind Pride is still and always will be present. “Pride is more than just one weekend in a year. Or even a month. Pride is something that we live and breathe every day. Whether we celebrate L.A. Pride in mid-June (as we’ve done for the last 49 years) or, for this one specific year, decide to move it to another weekend, our celebration, our voices, our struggles, our triumphs, and our never-ending message for equality never stops.” Though the annual Pride festivities can provide a safe physical space for

Though some were left disappointed, many queeridentifying individuals realized that there is much more to the message and meaning behind Pride rather than the scheduled summer month festivities. 39

FEATURES · MORE THAN A FESTIVAL

Robert Cano (right) celebrates with a friend at the Long Beach Pride festival in the late 1990s. Photo courtesy of Robert Cano

“ Pride is more than just one weekend in a year. Or even a month. Pride is something that we live and breathe every day.”

queer folk, many argue that the global celebration events have become quite corporate over the years. In 2019, L.A. Pride had more than 80 sponsors, such as Verizon Wireless, M.A.C. Cosmetics, Bud Light and Skyy Vodka. Because of this assimilation, many agree that the spaces aren’t as queer as stated. Even before last year’s cancellations, some in the community had stopped attending the festivals and parades altogether. One of these individuals was CSULB women’s, gender and sexuality studies professor Dr. Melissa Hidalgo. “I think that very often pride kind of gets misconstrued, and especially the one thing about the festival is that it’s just one big party, right? Rainbow capitalism. Corporations are slapping rainbows everywhere, and it’s just another way to make money for capitalists,” Hidalgo said. Because of this increase in

corporatization, Hidalgo argues that the initial origins and histories of Pride have been lost. “When I think about Pride, I think [about how] there are these histories of protests against police violence, and I think that gets lost I know it gets lost when you see the corporatization of Pride. As long as Pride is corporate, I’m not sure how queer of a space it is anymore,” Hidalgo said. These origins entail the historical turning points in the gay liberation movement from the Stonewall riots, the Black Cat riots and the riot at Compton’s in the Tenderloin District. These were all against police brutality, which is why some also feel that federal officials don’t belong at Pride events, because of their historical harms that caused traumas within queer spaces. Another historical turning point would be the AIDS pandemic, where millions

of lives were lost due to the infectious disease and the lack of immediate treatment and response from the federal government. During this time Pride, was a fight to be heard and not even in death would come acknowledgement that these individuals needed aid. An individual who lived through this was the founder and programmer of the Long Beach Q film festival, Robert Cano. Though Cano has spent some of his Pride events marching and fighting for visibility and aid, he remembers his first time attending a Pride event and how cathartic the feeling was to see his community so glorious and fluorescent as they came together like kindred spirits. “When I saw so many people there, I started crying. I was overcome with emotion. Because I had lived so isolated in a bubble and I saw so many people.. whites, Blacks, Asians, and they’re all mixed up. And I saw gay Latinos who were my age. And I just thought, wow, I am not the only one out there. So it was very emotional,” Cano said. This year, many Pride events are expected to resume in-person, including the festivities in Los Angeles and San Francisco. Others will remain online, like they were last year. As of press time, Long Beach Pride had not determined whether its event would be in person or virtual.

Cal State Fullerton student Tim Luna enjoys L.A. Pride 2019 with his boyfriend, Uly. Photo courtesy of Tim Luna

No matter whether the festivities are online or in-person, though, many queer folk agree that it’s all about commemorating the losses and triumphs in the community, celebrating visibility, and coming together. Cal State Fullerton student Tim Luna, for one, is grateful for Pride events in whatever form they exist. “I’m so thankful for [virtual Pride events] because in a time like this, I get to interact with friends, and it’s instantaneous, and if this didn’t exist, then I’d go crazy.” Luna said. “I’d say utilize it. Find a queer space online. The beauty of online is that you can be [as] anonymous as you want. You can celebrate that pride, and it doesn’t mean you have to post a pic of yourself in a rainbow shirt, but you know you still get to be among people in your community and culture in any way you choose.”

“

I’m so thankful for [virtual Pride events] because in a time like this I get to interact with friends, and it’s instantaneous, and if this didn’t exist, then I’d go crazy.” — Tim Luna

DIG MAG Summer 2021

Articles inside

Graduation

Imposter, Who?

More than a Festival

The Bloom Boom