FROM DUBLI NETWORK TEAM LEADER TO
SENIOR VICE PRESIDENT
Eliminate One Word From Your Business Vocabulary You have achieved the rank of a DubLi Network Team Leader and, as such, have helped at least three of your front lines become Team Members as well as registered a minimum of five active personal customers to DubLi.com, the world’s largest Cash Back online shopping platform. You already have a taste of what it takes to be a leader. Good leadership is everything, particularly when building a home-based business. There are many definitions of leadership. The Collins English dictionary defines leadership as “the leader(s) of a party or group.” However, good leadership is much more than just that. Leadership is more than power or authority. A good leader will not only produce great results but also create challenging goals by enlisting the help of others.
Good leadership is an essential key to success A great leader who can motivate others to perform at their best is a leader of excellence. There are many different styles of leadership, but the key to all great leaders is how they communicate with their teams. When giving well-intentioned and well-meaning advice, one simple word that has proven ineffective: “should”. If you notice a member of your team struggling, instinctively you might say, “You know what
DubLi Network | 2016.07.19
you should do?” or “You should…” When used in this context, “should” has the power to diminish your team’s ability to problem-solve independently. After all, becoming a DubLi Network Senior Vice President means you were able to duplicate your business throughout your organization/downline and have successfully taught them how to solve problems and make quality decisions on their own.
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Using “should” presents a problem rather than a solution
How many times have you used the word “should” when communicating with your team? The word “should” has become a standard in our everyday vocabulary. While we use it sincerely, as a means for motivating ourselves and others, its underlying meaning is one of frustration and guilt. The word does more harm than good; as well-meaning as we may intend. The word “should” is a subtle and treacherous word that sends the wrong message. When, in fact, telling yourself or others that they “should” be doing something, it renders a message of not good enough. Using “should”-based terminology doesn’t respect a person’s ability to make a decision themselves. With all the best of intentions,
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If you continually remind yourself or your team of what they are not doing or “should” be doing, it emphasizes the negative instead of the positive solution, which typically spirals into further negativity. Furthermore, using the word “should” talks about concepts that we wish we were and, as such, is not accepting reality. Lack of self-acceptance based in current reality is not at all helpful to someone trying to get ahead and improve themselves and their business. As Dr. Shad Helmstetter explains in his book What to Say When You Talk to Yourself, when we tell ourselves that we “should” be doing something, we are reinforcing the idea that we’re not doing it. Over the long-term, when we tell ourselves or other people that we “should” or they “should” be doing something, we continue to reinforce the negative aspect and the fact that they are not doing it in the first place.
using “should” de-motivates people, exposes a weakness that affects self-esteem and reveals a judgmental opinion that was neither requested nor solicited. When you say “I really should make more calls each day,” does this make you feel more enthusiastic about picking up the phone? More determined to follow through? Or do you start procrastinating even more so? “Should” feels like a self-imposed guilt trip, and when we feel guilt, human nature results in resentment, bitterness, and discouragement. These are not helpful traits conducive for building people up and making them more productive.
DubLi Network | 2016.07.19
DubLi Network | 2016.07.19
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Problems and conflicts happen all the time
Focus on how the endeavor relates to your personal values If you are chronically tardy, instead of telling yourself “I should be on time” or “I shouldn’t keep people waiting,” change your terminology to “It’s really important I am on time for this meeting.”
…and they are opportunities to improve the communications process and important business relationships. As such, as a leader, it’s critical you learn how to deal with a wide range of situations. It all starts with effective communication. What this means is that you need to know how to communicate with your downline in an effective and meaningful way. Try one of these alternatives for the word “should” next time you’re offering up some advice:
Accept reality and identify with feelings. Many of us believe that we are victims of what happens to us from outside sources. “I shouldn’t be feeling this way because of what she said to me.” Change your thought process into positive self-talk and instead ask yourself “why is this feeling affecting me this way right now?”
“I have an idea.” “What do you think?” “Can I offer some advice?” “Next time, I will.”
Additionally, you also give your team the opportunity to identify their own creative solutions by opening up a two-way dialogue. Think of duplication! A duplicate business is the shortest path towards achieving the highest rank with DubLi Network.
Take action by replacing your “should’s” …with a word or phrase that is more solution-based in the future, i.e. “next time, I will spend 20 minutes each morning making calls.” Focus on the benefits instead of what you or the other person is not doing. Instead of saying “I should do more social media marketing,” remind yourself how great you feel when you post something on Facebook and several people respond favorably. Remember how you enjoy the appreciation, the gratitude and the recognition from a great post. Or, “I feel great providing valuable content to my team.”
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