Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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C o n t e n ts Fall 2017
Cover Stories 20
Love lessons from Chip and Joanna Gaines
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Major Lies culture tells us about love & Relationships
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6 Films to watch on netflix this weekend
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is tiny house living right for you?
Feature story 65
Adventure awaits: Everything you need to know for your next romantic weekend getaway
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Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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C o n t e n ts
Relationships 11 Rules for
Fighting Fair
15 How to Deal With a Partner Who Won’t Get Off Their Phone
16 Apps That Will
Ruin Your Relationship
22 Date Ideas for
This Weekend That Don’t Cost Anything
25 Pop Up Weddings: What Are They & Should You Have One?
28 Five Times
Fictional Couples Taught Us Real Relationship Lessons
Lifestyle
Finance
31 Five Reasons Why
49 How to (Actually)
You’re So Obsessed with “This Is Us”
35 Practical Tips for Decorating Small Spaces
36 Couples Workouts You’ll Both Enjoy
38 The Best Cars for
Make Money Online
53 Ten Ways to
Save Money When Eating Out
56 Focus Groups:
The Perfect Side Hustle
59 Fun Money: Why
Every Type of Couple
You Should Have It in Your Budget
42 Questions
60 How to Find
Everyone’s Had About Eating Healthy
A Great Gig in a Small Town
62 Student Loans & Marriage: Facts You Should Know Before Tying the Knot
Travel 73 Here’s How You Can Visit the Set of Hocus Pocus
74 The Stages of
Vacationing with Your Significant Other for the First Time
76 Tips & Tricks for Packing Light
79 Travel Hacks That Will Get You More for Your Money
82 Witty Instagram Captions for Every Type of Fall Photo
84 Top 10 Adults
Only Vacation Spots
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From the Editor
E
“ ” trying to sneak in a little vacation right before the holidays is a great way to relieve stress between you & your partner.
Get our digital magazine!
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very issue of Thrive gets me excited, but I have to admit, this one has me extra pumped. Why? Because it’s fall y’all! Here in the south that means temperatures below ninety degrees, Friday night lights, and visits to the pumpkin patch. While the temperatures here don’t get quite as frigid as our friends up in the north, that doesn’t mean we won’t don our boots and sweaters and drink our pumpkin spice lattes in denial that it’s not quite as cool as we wish it was. Frankly, we’re just relieved that it’s no longer hot enough to fully bake a batch of cookies from the inside of our parked cars. The break from the heat has us all excited for the coming months of cold weather. There is so much in this issue that we at Thrive just can’t wait to share with you. With the holidays creeping up on us, it was a no-brainer to make this issue the travel issue! While so many holidays at once can be stressful, the time off from jobs makes it ideal to sneak a little vacationing in somewhere, and there’s no time to plan like the present! I encourage you this month to find at least one day to take a mini vacay with your boo, even if you can’t leave town. This will help cut down on the stress of the upcoming holiday season and help keep communication between you and your partner in check. In this issue, there are all kinds of destination suggestions, tips and tricks for planning, and even fun travelling couple Instagram accounts to follow for inspiration. And as always, we have some really great articles about finances and relationships as well.
So - whatever your preference, I hope you enjoy this season’s issue of Thrive. Have a look around!
Dusti Wells Editor-in-Chief
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R e l at i o n s h i p s
Rules for fighting fair How to set parameters so that our fighting is healthy and productive, rather than harmful and destructive. By Audrey Roloff
photo by Phil Chester
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“Remember, you’re on the same team.”
“Don’t go to bed angry.” “Communication is key.”
“Happy wife, happy life.”
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y husband & I heard these cheesy (but true) pieces of marriage advice hundreds of times, but we still fight often. As the country song goes….“I just wanna be mad for a while.” It’s both comical and ridiculous… We argue about misinterpreted expectations, our in-laws, lack of respect, who did what, feeling undervalued, feeling unloved, the words we say, plans, perspectives, household chores, financial decisions, career decisions, sex, driving directions, and even the temperature in our house… Needless to say, the exhausting “becoming one” thing is a journey…During our wedding ceremony, the officiate explained how our wedding day signified the commitment to our vows, and our “becoming one.” Becoming one with your spouse is both a moment and a daily choice. But because oneness is a constant struggle, fighting can be practically inevitable. It’s not a matter of if you will fight, but when. And I can only imagine (as I have observed from my own parents) that it becomes even more inevitable with children… So, if we are going to fight, how do we fight fair? What parameters can we set so our fighting is healthy and productive, rather than destructive?
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During our season of engagement, my husband and I outlined 10 rules for fighting fair. And boy... did we need them then (we had a pretty rough engagement). We drew inspiration from the Bible, premarital counselors, our parents, and from learning the hard way. Here is what we came up with so you can learn things the easy way.
Don’t Fight in Public Fighting in public escalates a fight. Both people usually become self-conscious about how the fight looks to family, friends, or strangers, which makes the situation more about the fight, and not about resolving issues. Often, fighting in public just causes us to fight even more in private. And then it’s awkward for whoever you’ve been fighting around. Maybe they sometimes even feel that the need to choose a side. We established this rule so that we would resolve our issues in a safe, private space. When we are alone, we can be honest, vulnerable, and specific. Not to mention, waiting to discuss frustrations in private has prevented us from countless “night ruined” experiences.
Don’t go to bed fighting, & always sleep in the same bed We’ve all heard it before, “Don’t go to bed angry.” Don’t go to bed mad at each other. But I want to offer one exception to this rule… If it is 2:00 a.m., and you haven’t solved your issue, it’s likely that you’re not going to solve it by 3:00 a.m…. Go to sleep, and resolve it in the morning (not weeks later when it all blows up in your face again). Choose to hash out your disputes at a time when you can both be alert and focused, and in a place that is a neutral location (not an office, bedroom ect). My husband and I decided that we would keep our bedroom a “fight free” zone. This is so that we can associate our bedroom with love, encouragement, joy, intimacy, and connection. We choose to take our own conflict resolution process to the kitchen, living room, or even garage. Also, don’t ever go sleep in the living room, or at a friend’s house because your mad. Always sleep in the same bed.
Photo by Phil Chester
Have cooling off periods Try not to overreact. Yelling and retaliation are usually forms of this, and they are rarely helpful or productive. Yelling, interrupting, and retaliation typically causes the person you are lashing out at to shut down. The volume of your voice does not increase the validity of your argument. Yelling, interrupting and retaliating make it very difficult for reconciliation to transpire. It’s important to consider whether you are responding or reacting. Your spouse is way more likely to see your viewpoint if it is as a response to a hurtful situation. Reacting usually comes from a defensive heart, and it can cause the fight to intensify. Allowing for cooling off periods offers each person some time to organize their thoughts. This helps to speed up the resolution process because both of you will be ready to respond, and less likely to react. Walking away from an issue and then coming back to it later can help each of you to articulate more clearly while staying calm.
always Seek a resolution over a compromise Be clear, honest, and specific about the root of the issue. Vague answers don’t help to find a permanent solution, which is what you both should be looking for. You can’t just say, “You’re so disrespectful,” or, “You never listen.” These statements only create drama and prevent resolve. It’s much better to explain why you feel disrespected, or why you feel like they aren’t listening. It’s also important to deal with one issue at a time. If you have an
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accumulation of issues to resolve, put them on a future agenda, or commit to resolving each one, before moving on to the next. Avoid stockpiling dozens of complaints and/ or frustrations, and then just dumping them on your spouse all at once. Seeking a resolution requires both of you to hear each other out, apologize and forgive, and establish a solution to keep the same fight from reoccurring. Compromise is really only a temporary fix. Seeking resolve requires more effort and time, but it worth “fighting” for if you really want to build a solid, thriving marriage. Always seek resolutions, not compromises!
DON’T LET YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES CONVINCE YOU TO BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE OPPONENTS. YOu’RE ON THE SAME TEAM!
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remind each other you are on the same team You know that point in the fight where it is about to get bad… stop right there, grab his/her hand, and say these six words, “we are on the same team.” This is one of the most effective bomb diffusers in our marriage. It is really hard to be mad at each other when you are holding hands. It just is, go on and try it. After reading this, you will probably think about trying it the next time you are in a fight with your spouse, but pride will seek to prevent you. Don’t let it! Be the one that is willing to reach over. In our marriage, when my husband reaches over to grab my hand during a fight, it immediately calms me down and reminds me that we are always on the same team (without him even having to say it). Remembering that you’re on the same team is crucial. Don’t let any of your circumstances convince you to believe that you are opponents. Do your part to build the peace, grab their hand.
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How to:
Deal with a partner who won’t get off their phone By Julia Naftulin
Voice Your Concerns The first step to fixing any relationship issue starts with confronting the problem. And lucky for you, there’s a tried and true way to voice your concerns without insulting your partner. A very useful formula for bringing up all kinds of difficulties is “I feel X when you do Y,” For example, “I feel hurt and ignored when I come home from work and you don’t look up from your phone to say hello.”
Get outside Sure, we live in a time when our cell phones are essentially extensions of ourselves. Our photos, intimate conversations, passwords and more are all stored on tiny devices, so it is no wonder we take them anywhere and everywhere and check them often. However, there is a line that should be drawn in your relationship. To help your partner get the start they need to being a little more phone-free, plan a few exciting, unplugged adventures.
Feel like you’re always a third wheel when it comes to your partner and their phone? Here’s what you should do. It’s not easy to confront a phone-obsessed significant other about their usage problem, but it is possible. We talked to two experts to determine the best ways to handle the situation and come out from the discussion with more one-on-one time sans phone for your relationship.
Set some ground rules If you and your partner think a more structured approach could work for combatting the problem, set a few rules and abide by them on a daily basis. Here are a few suggestions for rules you can easily use: • Phones aren’t allowed at any meals, no exceptions. • Try to keep phones out of the bedroom when possible. • Is the phone your primary way of telling time? Invest in an alarm clock instead.
Be Realistic If you voice your concern and your partner doesn’t seem to care or constantly falls back on their promise to try to work on their phone addiction, it could mean it’s time for couple’s therapy or even moving on. At the same time, it’s important that you evaluate whether it’s worth the trouble or if the problem is really that severe. If you find yourself annoyed every single time your partner takes out the phone, you’re probably over reacting.
How addicted are you?
Are you the one with the attachment problem when it comes to separating from your phone? Take our test and see which scenario best describes you.
You always set your phone down and listen to what your partner says when they are talking.
You pull out your phone, but only when conversations get boring or don’t apply to you.
You can’t help but pull out your phone at least once or twice in any social setting.
You often miss what your partner was saying because you were on your phone.
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mobile apps That may ruin your Romantic relationships By Hayley Hoover
THink Dirty This app is actually pretty genius. it shows you all the harsh chemicals that are in the products you use every day. However, it can easily be mistaken for something bad.
Tinder Couple
The goal of this app is to help you find love, but if you already have a significant other, you should go ahead and delete it. Just trust us.
If you and your partner are touching the same part of your screens at the same time, your phones will vibrate– and it’ll be like you’re kissing through thumbs! It’s cute in theory, but it’s so hard to use that you will get pissed. And probably break up.
Dirty Talk Premakes sexts to send to your significant other. Great if you’re actually using it, but letting it just sit on your phone may cause some suspicion with your partner.
Snapchat Though we love this app at Thrive, it is REALLY easy to use it for some shady stuff. Make sure you (and your partner) are using it to keep your snap streak alive, not sneak around. .
sarahah This app basically lets you say anything to anyone anonymously. Can you see why this may ruin your relationship? Yeah. Not a good plan.
whisper Mend
Photo by Dusti Wells
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This app on your partner’s phone is a sure sign that your relationship is about to expire. It is designed to help people move forward after ending relationships.
With the help of this app, you can anonymously post your thoughts for all of the world to see. It also connects you with similar ‘whisperers’ in your area.
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Okay, here’s an ad. “Why am I just learning about your DiscoverWeekly playlist, @Spotify?? You should def promote it more tbh.” @thisiscoll
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spotif
spotif
spotify.com/discoverweekly Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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Love Lessons From chip & Joanna Gaines
Surprise Each Other
By Julie Pennell We can all take a cue from one of the happiest couples, like, ever. We all know that Fixer Upper’s Chip and Joanna Gaines are serious #relationshipgoals. From the moment they entered our lives through the television screen, this couple has captured the heart of the American people (especially those of us from the great state of Texas). The home improvement duo are part of the reason we find ourselves glued to the TV when the show is on (the other part is the excitement of finding out how much shiplap they can find during demo day…) We just love the couple’s cute ways of showing each other that they are loved. On screen and off, its apparent that these two have an abundantly thriving marriage. Here at Thrive, we thought we could all learn from their joy. Below, see some of the sweetest love lessons we’ve learned from Chip and Jo and find out how you should apply them to your own marriage or relationship.
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Marriage can get a little stagnant if you do the same things day in and day out. It’s important to keep your partner on their toes, and the Gaines’ duo does an awesome job of that. Whether they’re being silly with each other (usually led by Chip) or planning huge over-the-top birthday and anniversary parties for each other, the couple knows how to shake the mundane day-to-day things up in a good way.
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Make each other laugh
Trust Each other
No explanation needed for why we need this one, but it is easy to get so stressed and busy with life that we forget to be silly together. Laughter is so important for not only your relationship but your own health, too. It can help to relieve tension, stimulate your heart, lungs and muscles, plus it can even improve your immune system. Take a cue from Chip and Jo to find some funny in your everyday life.
Joanna once said, “I knew he was the one because I knew I could trust him.” Hopefully you can already trust your partner (a super important quality in marriage), but continue to keep it strong by continuously building it up. Tell each other secrets, look into each other’s eyes and even just remind your partner that you’ve always got their back, no matter what. It will help a lot.
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Photo provided by HGTV.com
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Keep it real
Chip and Joanna really aren’t afraid to tell each other like it is, but they also throw in some seriously gush-worthy compliments as well. For example, if your partner’s hair looks completely wacky, it’s okay to call them out on it in a funny way, but make sure to always be finding nice things to say, too. Sometimes a little compliment will go a long way. And when your partner feels really good about themselves, they’ll be happier and more fun to be with. It’s a win-win.
maintain physical contact There is a simple joy that comes from touching your significant other, and Chip and Jo seem to know that. They’re always finding cute ways to connect physically. One study showed that daily touching between partners can increase feelings for one another. And also, don’t forget about kissing! Sneaking a peck (or two) from your partner has a lot of benefits, besides just being fun. It can lower your blood pressure, improve your anxiety and even help to increase your sex drive.
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One more season Despite recently announcing the closing of their HGTV home improvement show, Fixer Upper, the couple will be launching a spin-off series titled Fixer Upper: Behind the Design, which is set to premiere in October of 2018.
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Farmer’s Market Farmers markets are a great place to peruse a selection of fresh produce or handcrafted products, hear live music from local musicians or even run into some friends. The last time I was at a farmers market I was amazed at the multitude of styles of wallets and what they were made out of. Even the street entertainers are amazing to watch!
Movie Night Have some friends over and enjoy a movie night! Maybe you decide to watch a movie your group usually wouldn’t like a foreign film, a B-rated movie or a movie from the year you were born. Chances are you will mock the movie, but you are creating fun memories and probably a lot of inside jokes to be used over the years!
Date
Ideas
for this weekend that literally don’t cost anything By Brian A. Sands
Serve Together Go On A Hike
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Going on a hike is a way to be in nature and relax with your date. Maybe you know of a waterfall, an open pasture where wild animals roam, or a peaceful creek. The more thought you put into the location, the more appreciation your date will have for you.
A great way to discover more about the character of a person is to see if they are willing to serve. When we serve, we are making ourselves less and elevating others. If serving others is important to you, this will show your date’s perspective. You can serve at a soup kitchen, participate in a citywide clean-up day or even volunteer at a dog shelter.
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pop up weddings What are they & Should you have one By Amanda Buchnan One of the most exciting trends in the wedding industry over the last few years has been pop up weddings. The thought of a pop up wedding might seem a little gimmicky or too trendy for some couples, but it’s just a modern twist on an elopement or small wedding. It adds an extra layer to the celebration and brings a cool energy to an already special day.
How they work A pop up wedding is mostly spontaneous–couples book with maybe just a few weeks notice. The planner gets an officiant, photographer, and other service vendors together and puts together a lovely, quick, and intimate little ceremony. The couple just shows up and gets married! Spontaneous, fun, and definitely memorable for everybody involved. How adventurous couples choose to get with their pop up wedding varies. Some may hold the ceremony in a park (maybe the one where you picnicked on your first date) or in an art museum where you may very well get the boot, and have to finish your ceremony in the parking lot!
Is a pop up wedding right for you? How concrete is your vision for your wedding? If you or your partner already have a strong vision, a pop up wedding might not be a good fit. On the other hand, if wedding planning stresses you out, a pop up wedding might be the perfect solution. Are you a control freak? It’s totally fine if you are, but you’re going to have to let that go if you want a pop up! Pop up weddings are all about the element of surprise. They are also about letting go of control and placing it in the hands of a professional. How do you feel about being the center of attention for 12+ hours? That escalated quickly, right? But it’s not an exaggeration. The average wedding day is FULL, from early morning to late night, and all eyes will be on you and your partner for the entire day. If that gives you anxiety, then you might want to consider a smaller wedding, like a pop up wedding.
Photography by Phil Chester
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Lies culture tells us about
Love & Romance By Frank Powell | Photography by Chris Brogan
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ultural perceptions of love speak so loud and with such consistency that we would be naive to think we don’t enter into romantic relationships with a picture based largely on our surroundings. “Love has a history,” and we’re influenced by the voices more than we realize. For nearly five years of my marriage, I listened, and my marriage suffered. Chalk it up to perseverance or maturity, but this year I stopped listening. And while my wife and I have by no means arrived, our relationship is healthier today than ever. Regardless of your position in life’s journey—married, dating, single, whatever—tuning out the cultural lies about love, romance and sex is essential to experiencing healthy relationships and marriages.
///IF YOU just FIND THE RIGHT PERSON, YOUR RELATIONSHIP WON’T FAIL.
Cultural romance makes you believe one person exists for you. And only one. Therefore, your greatest task is finding the one. You expect perfection from everyone. If there’s only one person for you, you can’t lose that person. You need them in order to be complete. They become your god. I’m not a relationship expert, but that sounds unhealthy. Another problem with this thinking is it naively believes failed relationships are “their” fault. This explains why someone with a track record of break ups believes the next one will work.
///LOVE IS just A
///YOU CAN CHANGE
Almost all cultural signs point to this dangerous lie, that love is something you fall in and out of, a volcanic eruption of emotions and passion. After seven years of marriage, I can say with 100% certainty love is not a feeling. Some days, I feel like throwing a temper tantrum because this marriage thing is hard, really hard. This is the reality of feelings. They come and go, kind of like the wind, except that’s giving feelings to much credit. Love is so much more powerful than failure and disappointment, it perseveres through sin and even death. That version of love—the actual real one—doesn’t sell tickets or books. It’s not popular or trendy. But really, what are we saying about love if it rests on a foundation as weak and shallow as our own feelings?
This is the classic example of Beauty and the Beast. If I try hard enough for long enough, I can change him (or her). More recently, the movie Frozen featured a song with the words, “He’s a bit of a fixer upper,” as if men are dilapidated real estate whose only hope is Chip and Joanna Gaines. Shout out to Fixer Upper. In our culture, the belief that we can change someone is a huge threat to healthy marriages. You can’t enjoy someone when you’re trying to change or fix them. What you will see more is that when you focus on changing you, the other person starts to change as well. But you haven’t changed your partner. In fact, your partner hasn’t changed at all. You’ve simply just changed your perspective.
simple FEELING.
///LOOKS ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN CHARACTER.
The cultural picture of men includes qualities like strong, rich and powerful. Women are painted as beautiful and perfect. Just watch a movie or music video about love. The truth is, it’s plastered all over our culture. The imagery and campaigns, entertainment, everything. In the end, I’ll just say this: If appearance or money make your top five values in a future spouse, you’re doing it wrong. For a relationship to last, you must choose someone whose identity isn’t found in you. They tell you what you need to hear rather than what you want to hear.
SOMEONE IF YOU TRY HARD ENOUGH.
Books that help to build a
great relationship
///TRUE LOVE
WILL SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS, every single one of THEM. Does your life suck? Is your existence meaningless? Are you insecure and selfish? No worries. I have a quick fix for you. It’s called love. True love fixes everything, always. Until you find it, your life will continue to suck. So says culture, at least. In reality, whatever baggage you carry before finding love follows you into the relationship. If you don’t unload the baggage beforehand, you’re throw it onto your partner. And some of that junk smells like crap. Love is in need of redemption.
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5 times
fictional characters taught us real love lessons By Julia Naftulin
Derek & Meredith From Grey’s Anatomy Eric & DOnna From That 70’s Show
Monica & Chandler From Friends Jim & PAm from The office The advice: date someone who makes you laugh all of the time. Watching Jim and Pam’s relationship progress from office buddies to best friends to an undeniably and madly-in-love couple makes them one of the best TV couples of all time. Their ability to make each other crack up from the silliest things is downright adorable.
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Who better to learn lessons from than a couple from one of the most well known (and relatable) shows! These two taught us that friendship makes for a great romantic relationship. This is what we can all only hope for. When Monica proposed to Chandler, all the tears flowed so much. Everyone wants their best friend/soulmate, right? Well, it’s not so hard to achieve. You just need to date someone you genuinely like, which doesn’t sound too complicated but you’d be really surprised.
Although all the characters in this show teach us lessons of some sort, Donna and Eric’s relationship has a lot to learn from. One big lesson these two love birds taught us is that saying ‘I love you’ for the first time may seem kinda scary, but it’s a really important step. Another thing is that true love is meant to be. If it’s meant to be, it will! Even though Eric and Donna have their ups and downs in the show (but don’t we all?), their love endures in a very dramatic reuniting. Their friendship is also very inspiring. Through thick and thin, the characters in ‘That 70’s Show” stick together no matter what awkward love triangles exist that week. Apparently friendship is important for love. Who knew!
These two taught us to go big or go home. When it comes to them, no shortcuts are taken. They have done it all from designing a house together to creating a candle-lit outline of the blueprints of their house, complete with a speech about the incredible life they could build together, to an elaborate proposal in an elevator with brain scans lining the walls.
Morticia & Gomez From The Addams Family Morticia and Gomez Addams may have had the best relationship on television. They practically worshiped one another, and Gomez proved time and time again that chivalry is not dead. They taught viewers how to love and love hard!
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Lifestyle
5 reasons why you’re obsessed with ‘this is us’ Trust us, you’re not the only one. By Christine Burke
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5 reasons why you’re obsessed with
Back in September, my News Feed started to fill with excited people gushing about a new show on NBC.
“OMG, SO. GOOD!” Seriously, these were actual posts in my News Feed. Sorry, not sorry, friends who know who they are. With every post, I’d roll my eyes and scroll on by. And unless you live under a rock, undoubtedly, you, too, have seen someone gush on social media about This Is Us or light up like a Christmas tree at the mere mention of the character Toby. Last week, I found myself a free evening and I decided to sit down and see if my social media connections actually know what good TV is. It couldn’t be that good, right?
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OMG YOU GUYS “THIS IS US” IS SO GOOD. So good that I had to text everyone I know and tell them that they needed to drop what they were doing and jump on the This Is Us train. So good that I had to announce in ALL CAPS on Facebook that I was now joining the This Is Us party. I can’t stop swooning, and my husband is getting jealous. The appeal of This Is Us is layered and multifaceted. You have nostalgic flashbacks coupled with flawed characters. You have glimpses into your own family drama and the realization that no family is perfect. There is laughter, there are tears, and as soon as an episode ends, you can’t help but want more. What is it about This Is Us that has us so spellbound? The reasons are endless, but here are a few.
Everyone wants a boyfriend like Toby Damon Seriously, Toby is the boyfriend we’ve all dreamed of for all of infinity. He’s funny, he’s witty, and when he asked Kate if she would like to be “fat friends” with him, we all just swooned. He’s certainly not perfect, and though he sucks at dieting, I don’t think I’m alone in saying that I’d leave my husband for him and his romantic ways.
We are all Kate. At one point or another, we’ve all struggled with our weight. We’ve stood in our closets and tried clothes on that have gotten too tight and have gotten frustrated with slow weight loss after having babies. Kate’s open, honest struggles with her obesity give a voice to what we so quietly say to ourselves every day. We are cheering Kate on because we hope we’ll win our weight struggles too.
America just needs a big, collective ugly cry Let’s face it: The last year has really been a shitshow. Real life family drama over politics has caused us all deep pain and grief. Friendships are forever changed, and we are all healing from words we can’t take back. This Is Us gives us a safe space to feel all our emotions and let our tears really flow.
The show reminds us that the ’80s was the greatest The Pearsons generation ever. let us admit our faults — In the flashback scenes with Jack and Rebecca, we catch and love our glimpses of what life looked like family despite in the ’80s, and I’ll be honest, it makes me yearn for the days theirs. of tube socks and big hair. Whether it’s Rebecca’s jean skirt or Randall and Kevin’s bedroom décor, This Is Us is a walk down memory lane, and we get to revisit our childhood when we tune in week to week.
pay attention, there is true heartache in every family. The Pearsons gently expose their flaws and their real feelings to us and give us pause to see ourselves in their struggles. Rebecca and Jack remind us that parenting is damned hard and that there’s no guarantee your kids won’t turn out to need a little bit of therapy when they get older. If you haven’t already, start watching This Is Us right now. If for no other reason than you will understand your Facebook News Feed as we all gush about the details of every damn episode. You guys, it’s just so good. Trust me. Just watch.
These days, life seems to be “Facebook perfect”: We see our friends and family smiling on social media and assume their lives are perfect. But if you just look behind the lens and really
There’s no dying. There’s no you or me or them. There’s just us. Kevin Pearson - This Is Us
Photos provided by NBC.com
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Practical Tips For decorating Small Spaces By Emily Shwake
Use rugs to define rooms in open floor plans and studio apartments Different textured rugs indicate a break in style. They can also spice up an otherwise boring or ugly floor by bringing bold colors or patterns. Light fixtures can indicate space, and different toned lights can signify different moods.
Hang mirrors across from windows to create the feeling of more space.
Hang curtains across the entire wall for more texture and the suggestion of more windows
While this trick won’t actually give you more square footage, it does give the illusion of more room! Long-legged furniture, which lets you stash storage underneath, can also be a wise investment.
Short curtains imply a small window. Long curtains mean endless possibilities. Check out our online article for before and after photos.
Hide your less attractive items in baskets & crates
Photos provided by Anthropologie.com
Ask a local wine store if they have any crates they can spare. They’ll usually give them away, especially if you buy a bottle or two.
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Take your relationship to the
next level and work out together! The only thing harder than finding a workout you actually enjoy? Finding a workout you and your partner both enjoy doing. While it might take a bit of trial and error, there are plenty of activities you and your boo can sign up for and return to time after time. Whether the two of you have competitive spirits or prefer getting outdoors in the fresh air, we have a whole slew of ideas. These outside the box ideas for exercising will help your body and your relationship! Two for one is our favorite at Thrive.
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Take a hike
Duke it out
If you’re not a hardcore gym goer but you’d like to get your fitness on, gearing up for a good hike is an awesome way to start. The wilderness will get your and your partner out and away from the daily grind and enjoying each other’s company. Hiking uphill is a great form of cardio and strength training for your legs. And also, did we mention the Instagram-worthy photos you’ll get thanks to that picturesque view? It’s an all around win-win situation.
Are you a fan of very high intensity interval training? Then you’ll just love taking your partner to a super sweat-inducing boxing workout. Practicing punch combinations and learning technique is not only rewarding, but a great way to take out the week’s stress and just enjoy each other’s company. Just be sure things don’t get TOO heated, remember to fight fair! Before you know it, this may become your second favorite way to get really sweaty with your partner.
Couple’s Workouts you’ll both enjoy By Julia Naftulin
Get Jiggy with it (Literally) Not everyone was born coordinated, but a dance lesson could be a fun way to break a sweat regardless of your skill or fitness level. Whether it is hip hop or salsa, there are plenty of styles to choose from to suit both of your tastes. If one of you has the basics down, you can choose a style you’ve both never tried to get that new experience together. Or, take the lead and teach bae a few moves so you can complete a killer dance routine together.
Go Rockclimbing
Hit the slopes
Seasoned climbers make this sport look like a breeze, but you’re in for a real arm workout with this activity. There are plenty of climbing gyms that offer beginners classes where you and your boo can learn the basics and then hit the walls. Nothing can be more rewarding than picking up a new skill (and potential hobby) together. And it’s great for building muscles in your arms and legs. Just be sure that you have all the correct climbing equipment needed to be safe!
Take your adventure level up a notch with a trip to the mountain. You and your partner can take a ski or snowboard lesson together and enjoy the fresh air on the slopes. It won’t even feel like a workout until you break for hot cocoa and realize how sore your legs are. And did we mention all the fun apres-ski festivities you can take part in after a day of skiing? Keep warm together by the fire and get snuggly.
Practice your fancy footwork The typical workout scene isn’t for everyone and if you don’t enjoy getting your sweat on, a fun and romantic activity like ice skating could be the perfect solution. Skating can be as difficult or as easy as you make it. Just make sure you’re comfortable enough with your partner to have them pull you up after you have fallen in the most embarrassing way possible.
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Photo by Splitshire
By Jaime Buerger
every type of couple The Best Cars for
By Jaime Buerger
F
or better or for worse, what you drive says something about you and how you live your life. When most couples buy a car, they do so with the idea that it becomes an extension of themselves and a reflection of their values and lifestyle. It’s a uniquely personal decision, based on things like your budget, daily driving habits and whether or not any kids have entered the picture. We’ve taken all of those factors into account and come up with the features tailored to every type of couple—fun-loving, kidtoting or otherwise—and the car models to match.
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Sportback will have you traveling in style. With a design inspired by the athleticism of a coupe, it has a hipper, sleeker vibe than its larger luxury cousins without sacrificing legroom. Leather seating comes standard, the Bang & Olufsen 3-D sound system is top-of-the-line.
The Couple who dares to Be Different
If everybody else is doing it, you sure aren’t. You’ve had a rebellious streak, and you admire the same in your partner, who you probably met someplace like Burning Man or something. The features you want: A silhouette (and color) that’ll turn heads, a premium sound system, and a turbocharged engine built for revving. Your perfect match: The Kia Soul Plus is an unusuallyshaped compact wagon that comes in a range of flashy colors. It’s also roomy, stylish and powerful—and comes with an option for a Harman Kardon sound system.
The Couple who loves to Help Others
You’ve never met a social cause you couldn’t find time to throw your weight behind. You and your partner regularly volunteer for a host of nonprofits and donate to charities when you can. And though you often try to bike to places like work and school, you need a vehicle for long distance trips and most importantly, for helping lots of other people.
The features you want: A hybrid or electric vehicle that has plenty of cargo space for hauling donations, your weekly farmers market produce and thrift store finds. Your perfect match: With a driving range of 238 miles on a single charge, the Chevrolet Bolt EV outlasts similarlypriced competitors. That means more time doing good and less time at your garage’s electrical outlet. Plus, the cross-body frame makes it roomier than most subcompacts and the hatchback offers an impressive amount of storage space, including a secret cargo area.
The Couple WHO ENJOYS THE Finer Things
You work hard for your money—why shouldn’t you splurge now and then? You do have a deep appreciation for sophisticated cuisine, art and theater, and will venture far and wide to experience the latest and greatest. The features you want: Luxury, inside and out: heated leather seats, multi-zone climate control, a panoramic sunroof, turbocharged engine, high-end sound system, and a customizable information and entertainment system to keep you ahead of the curve.
The Couple With a Thirst for the Great Outdoors
You two might live in the city, but often fantasize about picking up and moving to a small cabin on a lake or in the woods. You have a dog—or are waiting for your partner to agree on getting one. The features you want: All-wheel drive to take on bumpy back roads; trailer hitch; tons of storage space for your camping gear and room to tote along your bikes, skis, kayaks, ATVs and anything else you and your sporty partner could desire. Your perfect match: A midsize pickup like the Honda Ridgeline (pictured left), is pretty much made for adventuring. It’s got a ton of storage space (think: a full-size trunk underneath the truck bed, and a flip-up backseat for items you don’t want to leave in the bed), a dual-action tailgate—and there’s even a tent attachment and optional cargo racks.
when shopping, choose a car that will be good for the long term.
Shop around. Make sure you view all your options before settling.
Negotiate Terms. No price is final to a car salesman,
Utilize the internet. Great deals can be found online every day.
Your perfect match: An understated high-performance sedan like the Audi A5
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Discover Weekly
“After I received several excellent playlists in a row, I couldn’t stop thinking about how Spotify had figured me out...” -Quartz
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spotify.com/discoverweekly Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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Healthy foods & what they do
Bananas Contain numerous vitamins & minerals Apples Great source of natural sugar
Blueberries Good source of antioxidants
Q A
What’s the big deal about gluten?
Gluten is a term for the proteins that form when flour and water are mixed together. Nowadays, there’s a common belief that gluten is hard on the digestive system. You should understand your own body and what you’re able to digest, instead of demonizing gluten left and right. There are no studies that demonstrate benefits to eating a gluten-free diet if you don’t suffer from gluten intolerance or celiac disease.
Q
How often should you eat pastas? Does it matter if it is gluten, gluten-free, or whole grain?
A
A balanced diet is the most important thing: There are many people who say they do not digest pasta well, but it’s also because it is often eaten in very large portions. We recommend experimenting with smaller servings to see if that affects digestion. When it comes
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Beetroot About 10% of carbs, but most is fiber
to whole grain, one must not glorify it, since it could sometimes also be indigestible. Try semi-whole wheat at first to see if you digest it well.
Q
Are salads really necessary to have a well balanced diet?
A
According to both of our specialists, not necessarily. Salads are good, but you need a wide variety of sources to get nutrition. Strive for balance in the long run. Each meal does not need to be well-balanced, but eat as varied of a diet as possible. There are people who, depending on their digestion, may have trouble eating raw vegetables, so salad is definitely not essential for nutrition.
Q A
Could juice cleanses be a scam?
Detox = propaganda, and more often than not, a great way for other people to make money off you. So sure, go ahead and drink your green juice if you want, but don’t consider it as an actual cleanse,
and remember that it’s still better for you to eat actual fruits and vegetables. As long as one has a varied and balanced diet, there is no reason to do a detox. Your kidneys and your liver pretty much do the trick when it comes to detoxing your body.
Q
What really happens when you decide to cut out meat and dairy from your diet?
A
There are plenty of ethical reasons to not eat animal products, but from a health standpoint, you can honestly eat anything if you’re able to digest it well. There aren’t really immediate benefits to not eating meat or milk, unless you were eating like, two steaks a day. As long as you’re eating a **say it with me** balanced and varied diet, there’s no real health-related reason to cut out meat and dairy. FYI: The World Health Organization announced in 2015, that processed meats were actually proven carcinogenesis. Also Red meat was classified as a “highly likely carcinogenic.”
Chickpeas Solid source of iron and fiber
Q
Is there one thing we should definitely eat to avoid getting cancer?
A
Unfortunately not, which is very contrary to popular opinion: There simply is not one perfect diet, as there are no anti-cancer foods. When it comes to cancer, it can be such a complex disease that on one can prevent it for sure, and also there is a huge amount of other things which come into play like such as lifestyle, stress, physical activity and genetics. When it comes to general health, again, a varied and balanced diet is your best bet.
Q A
Is eating organic somehow healthier?
There is at least one clear advantage: fewer pesticides in your veggies. If your vegetables aren’t organic, definitely make sure to wash them really well and peel them. But then again, you should always wash you vegetables no matter the circumstances before consuming them.
Photo by Guillermo Gavilla
Questions that everyone’s had about eating healthy By Jennifer Padjemi Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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Midnight in Paris
Article & Photos provided by Relevant
Woody Allen’s netflix original stars Owen Wilson, who plays a disenfranchised writer who somehow travels back in time the golden age of literature in Paris.
Okja
Yes, Okja is a sci-fi movie about a giant, genetically modified pig, but it’s also a parable about consumption, environmentalism and the limits of science.
Nightmare Before Christmas
Netflix was kind enough to add this classic back to the que right before the holidays! Thanks guys.
6 Films to watch on netflix this weekend
The Babadook
The Cinco
The Babadook gives a ferociously terrifying look at one widow and her young son’s dealings with a grim monster.
Needing some laughs? You literally can’t go wrong with a Jim Gaffigan comedy special.
Sing Street
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A criminally underrated coming of age comedy, Sing Street tells the story a group of outcast teens who start a band to try to fit in and discover the real power of music and friendship. It’s also packed with great original music.
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Is tiny home living right for you?
Take our Quiz! 46
When you decide to move into a home, what will you be looking for? There are certain practicalities that need to be considered. If you have more than just yourself living in any future tiny home, will one bathroom be enough? Maybe you like to cook, and you’ll definitely want some decent counter space. If you consider yourself a tall person, you may be wary of ceiling height. You may also want some more financial freedom. Fortunately, tiny houses have a big advantage in that area. They’re comparatively cheap to build, so you could customize your future home and pay for it in cash. In fact, the cost per square foot of a tiny home is $134.40, and 68% of tiny home owners don’t have to have a mortgage payment. We think that can make spatial sacrifices worth it for anyone!
If you like to get away from people occasionally and spend some time alone, you may not be able to do that often if you share a tiny house with someone. Sure, you could walk around outside, but if it’s winter or it’s raining, that might not always be an option for you. You’ll want to consider aspects of your life and your personality before committing to a tiny space. People who buy tiny houses are joining a community of others who want to downsize for one reason or another. They can be great living options for those who aren’t ready for a full-size house but are done with apartment living, and they can also be a bad idea for those who lead a bigger life. It’s important to learn everything you can about tiny houses before you look into buying one.
A big factor to really consider before buying a tiny home is the space you’ll be limited to. If you own a lot of things, you’ll want to downsize big time before moving into a tiny home. There really won’t be much storage space in it.
Size, placement and features are all important factors to really think about when you are studying tiny houses that may be in your future. As cute as they are, take your time before jumping into your next home.
If you could pick one city to live in, which one would it be?
Who do you mind giving up most of your privacy to, if anyone?
A. I have to pick just one? C. Roswell, New Mexico B. Honolulu, Hawaii D. New York, New York
A. I’m an open book. B. Only my partner.
in general, Where are you the most comfortable at?
Are you interested in environmental sustainability?
A. Anywhere new. B. With just my partner.
A. Let’s preserve the earth! B. A little bit.
C. Surrounded by nature. D. With friends and family.
C. A few of my friends. D. No one! I need space.
C. Yes! I love nature. D. Not really...
What do you want your neighbors to be like?
Are you excited by the prospect of living off the grid?
A. Always changing. B. Just a few, not nosy.
A. Yes! I hate being tied down. C. Absolutely! B. I want to be close, but off. D. No! I need stores nearby.
C. Are neighbors necessary? D. Close, in case I need them.
exactly how much stuff do you need with you at all times?
are you looking to spend less and not be tied down?
A. Just a backpack full. B. Necessities, that’s it.
A. Yes please! B. I just want to spend less.
C. I rely on nature. D. I need all my stuff!
C. I just want a cool house. D. I like consistency, so no.
Mostly A’s
Mostly B’s
Mostly C’s
Mostly D’s
It can be said that RVs are the original tiny house. If you’re looking to downsize or you want to live simply, an RV is an option. We at Thrive are pretty obsessed with restored airstream campers.
Trailer tiny homes are full tiny houses that have been constructed on a trailer that’s hitched to the back of a truck. This tiny home design is the most common and the first tiny home to gain a lot of media attention.
If you want to be truly connected to your surroundings, a yurt is the tiny home design for you. Yurts are the traditional round tents that Mongolian nomads lived in!
Tiny home living may not be right for you, but renting a small condo or apartment may be a similar and more well suited alternative!
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Finance
How to Actually make money online Yes, it is possible. And its easier than you think. By Grant Sabatier
Photo by Splitshire
Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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{actually} make money online How to
Photo by Lyla Sabier
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N
ot surprisingly, it’s pretty easy to make money online. What’s tough is to make enough money online to quit your job and do it full-time. I have met hundreds of people who make between $100 – $2,000 per month of income online, but very few who make enough to do it full-time. The best thing about making money online is that it typically requires so little overhead – you don’t need an office, you don’t need a garage full of products, you don’t even need to get off the couch sometimes. But while it’s flexible – it’s a ton of work and actually pretty tough. Of course, there are always the stories of people who make an insane amount of money online, but they are the exceptions and it’s unfortunately not as easy as running a few Facebook ads and making bank. Here’s how I know: I’ve built my entire career online. It’s made me a millionaire and helped me reach financial independence at the age of 30. Here’s what I’ve learned over the past 8+ years making money online.
1
BUILD A WEBSITE AND MONETIZE YOUR CONTENT
I’m not going to sugarcoat it for you– it definitely takes some time to make money on a website. I estimate that I spent at least 500 hours building and writing for my company, Millennial Money before I made my first $1. I just did it because I loved. You really gotta love it to put in the time. Ninety percent of the blogs I see these days last less than 6 months – people just burn out which is easy to burn to do when your blog doesn’t have any traffic.
viewing analytics is of the utmost importance when marketing products through a website. I’d wanted to launch my own website since 2010, but it took me five years to find the time to actually do it. Sure, I was pretty busy between the years 2010 and 2015 trying to make as much money as possible and pursue financial independence. While I was being very intentional about how I built all of the pieces of this website, I didn’t have any massive expectations for traffic or revenue. It took me 3 months to get to 1,000 total visitors and I was so pumped to hit that goal. I just kept writing and writing and writing. Then almost two years later.. My mind is just completely blown. I never even imagined this was possible. I didn’t have any crazy goals back then, I just wanted to write. That is just a lot of people. Like this many people. I’m absolutely blown away.
2
SELLING OTHER PEOPLE’S PRODUCT
Over the past seven years, I’ve helped sell over 50 different types of products online by providing marketing services. In almost all of these cases, I was paid for my time, but in a few cases, I was compensated based on results. This is when you can really make bank by getting part of the money you help someone else make. It’s the win-win of consulting; all you invest is your time and the more profit you drive the more money you can make. In a few cases, like with the headphones company, I was able to maximize my value by negotiating a deal where I got paid based on the amount of profit I was able to drive – which with this one client was insane. I got 20% of the profit that I drove that was directly attributable to the digital marketing campaigns that I was running. I knew that I was going to crush it, so I spent extra time up front making sure that the contract I had him sign covered a ton of scenarios. While I tried to make the case, which was true, that my strategy would help increase sales over at least the next 2+ years, the owner of the company would only sign on for 6 months.
3
LAUNCH YOUR OWN PRODUCT OR SERVICE
Last but not least, you can really make money online by launching your own product or service. It has not been easier in history to launch an online business and reach people with your product, which is both an absolutely awesome opportunity but also makes business a lot more competitive. It’s just hard to stand out. I launched my own online marketing agency in 2010, but I didn’t launch a
real online product until a few months ago. My cocreator Matt and I had a phenomenal 5 figure launch the first few days (and also we launched on a holiday weekend because we wanted to control the sign ups). If you really want to build a product, make sure that you have something to sell that people want to buy. A great way to do this is by analyzing Google search volumes using the free Google Keyword Planner to see how many people are searching for what you want to sell. This tool also really tells you how competitive the keyword is, meaning how many people are bidding on it, thus how competitive it is likely to be to get visibility for your product or brand.
BE CAREFUL! IT’S NOT EASY TO MAKE MONEY USING FACEBOOK & GOOGLE! It’s not some secret system to make money on Facebook ads without having a really awesome product or maybe a service. But let me be clear there is definitely some real value being shared and some legitimate people really making money online, but they are rare. Or they are just making money by promising to help you make money. Often there ends up not being a lot of “there” there. Don’t be fooled by a Facebook scammer and use your common sense always.
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10
ways to save money when eating out
By Mustard Seed Money
According to the USDA’s food expenditure data from 2014, millennials spend about 44% of their food budget on eating out. Whatever the reason may be, it’s apparent that we are frequenting restaurants and utilizing carry-out/delivery more and more. So how can we save some money while doing so?
How much of a saver are you? How much do you currently maximize your restaurant budget? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, add the corresponding amount of points to your overall score.
+2
I eat out for lunch at least 3 or 4 times a week.
+1
I always order an alcoholic beverage at dinner.
+4
I don’t take the time to ever search for coupons.
1
Check out online deal sites. The four biggest sites that may save you money are Groupon, Living Social, Restaurant.com and OpenTable.
2
Never leave home without a coupon. Most of the time, restaurants’ websites and Facebook pages have deals and you can save at least 10-15%.
3
Join a restaurant loyalty club. We have gotten free meals, BOGO deals, free chips.
4
birthday or anniversary clubs. See if you can sign up for any sort of birthday or anniversary promos. Some places will do a free dessert on your birthday, and others free meals.
5
Buy discounted gift cards. Cardpool.com and Cardcash.com are great for this. Both are easy places to obtain discounted gift cards. It’s super easy. Just search for your favorite places.
6
Take advantage of daily specials. Restaurants usually have a special of the day and prices are often highly discounted.
7
Eat at home. Drive to the restaurant and order carry-out. This will allow you to skip paying a delivery fee and a service tip to the waiter.
8
Drink Water. Soda can cost anywhere from $0.05 to $0.25 for the restaurant, and they sell it to you for $3+. Alcohol markups can often time exceed 600%.
9
Become a mystery shopper. There are multiple mystery shopper networks that you can join, and you are reimbursed for the cost of your food plus a small payment for a review on a certain restaurant.
10
Eat slower. At many restaurants, you receive a bigger serving portion than you actually need. AKA, room for leftovers! Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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Focus Groups THe perfect side hustle By Grant Sabatier There are many research types you can participate in. Some of them are fairly standard where you visit the company at their location or someone from the company visits you at your home, and you answer some questions. You can also take part in lots of online discussions and do everything from the comfort of your computer. There is even something called mystery shopping in which participants pose as regular customers and then write down information about the business they are visiting on things such as their customer service experience and the cleanliness of the location they visited. A popular research type is product testing. This is really when participants are given a specific product to test. These products can include things like food, drinks, and even beer. Yet another common item is shaving supplies, such as cream and razors. Some popular topics that often come up in marketing research include cars, sports, politics, heath, cell phones, food & drink, among others. The descriptions for these are listed below.
Types of Focus Groups There are companies out there that are willing to actually pay you to test new products and participate in group discussions. Some of them you can even do online. People between the ages of 18 and 30 are a highly coveted demographic for most or all companies, so many of them are willing to pay to talk you. So how much money can you make participating?
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CARS
SPORTS
POLITICS
For these tests, it does not matter what car you personally drive. You often just need to provide your opinions on what you look for in a vehicle and how you view certain brands. In some cases, you might even get to drive some new cars and share your opinions, but most car focus groups have to do with technology or features.
If you are a die-hard sports fanatic, then you will definitely enjoy providing your opinion on current sports trends. These surveys are really even great for casual fans because companies are looking for their opinions as well. No matter what sport you like there’s definitely a focus group for it.
Many times, companies want feedback on political television ads before sending them to air. You will watch an advertisement and then offer your opinions on how it made you feel and whether you like the candidate. No matter what your political affiliation is there are some focus groups for you.
Pro Tip Answer questions honestly. They are looking for your unique opinion.
HEALTH
CELL PHONES
FOOD AND DRINKS
OTHER
There are many health issues that are specific to both men and women. Most of the time you just need to share your attitudes and opinions about things related to any medical conditions, your lifestyle, treatments, and medications. Also, if you happen to have a condition you can get paid quite a bit of money.
Cell phone companies spend a ton of money organizing focus groups – like a ton, so they are very common. Whether you prefer Android or Apple, you can take surveys based on experiences with your mobile devices. There are some paid focus groups where you test a new mobile application long before it get’s released.
This is absolutely one of the most enjoyable focus groups you can be a part of. You get to eat or drink something, which will probably be delicious, and then offer your opinions. You essentially get paid to eat, and what’s better than that?
There are focus groups on almost everything, including things like entertainment and business trends. You never know what you may enjoy, so it’s definitely worth trying out a few focus groups. You will likely be very surprised.. I always find them fun.
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Fun Money
why you should have it in your budget How does an indulgence allowance sound? You know, a little guilt-free spending that doesn’t find its way to creditors, insurance agents, utility companies, or grocery stores? Fun money keeps you sane as you continue to make the tough, daily sacrifices it takes to win with money. We like to think of it as the icing on the budget—a sweet topping that, in moderation, can actually help you reach your money goals.
Why you need to plan for fun money You need food, water and shelter. You don’t need to get a manicure or play 18 holes of golf. But here’s what happens if you don’t budget some “me” money: you’ll spend it anyway. The reason a cash flow plan works in the first place is that every dollar gets a name. So even if you have the discipline of a monk and vow not to spend on small luxuries, trust us, you or your partner will eventually buy something just for fun. So do your budget a favor and factor in some fun before the month begins. The more realistic your plan is, the more likely it is to actually work.
What it isn’t Fun money often gets lumped into one of a few categories: your entertainment fund. It’s none of these. It’s a separate amount to spend however you want, whenever you want. The beauty of pocket money is you don’t know what you’re going to buy with it yet. You can use it as the mood strikes you, without guilt. Protect it—or you’ll find a thousand nonfun ways to spend it.
How much money to budget Your pocket money might be $10 or it might be in excess of $100 per month. Depending on your income, debts and long-term goals, the amount you budget could be drastically different from your neighbor. Ultimately, only you know how much fun you can afford.
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Understand Networking in Small Towns Many small communities don’t do things quite like large urban hubs. You may see this in pronounced ways by observing how decisions are made by the town’s leaders and small business owners. Members of small, interwoven communities tend to network and make decisions the good oldfashioned way, face to face. They ask around about one another.
Get in Cahoots With Influencers
Go Right to the Top With ideas
As you begin the process of getting to know (if you don’t already) the community, you’ll probably be able to start figuring out who wears the collective pants in that small town. Who do the town folk really admire? These are the very people you will want to quickly endear yourself to if you want to accelerate your search. Even if they don’t work in your exact industry or career field, it’s typically these very people who will be the most willing and able to introduce you others and, importantly, to opportunities.
Assuming the economic base of your community is small, independent businesses, realize that not all of these companies are regularly posting open positions on the major job boards. Likewise, they may have true hiring needs but are too stinking busy to muster up an official job description and start interviewing. Try using this to your advantage. Study companies in your town that seem interesting and aligned with your expertise. What seem to be their key challenges and needs?
Seek Out jobs for Virtual Employees
Here’s one of the easier ideas if you work in a role like regional sales or consulting. Many jobs not only allow, but encourage, employees to work remotely in the regions they will be representing. You may also find all kinds of remote opportunities within webbased businesses. These companies tend to be among the most embracing about virtual teams.
Worried about business in your small town?
How to:
How to find a great gig in a small town
find a great gig in a small town
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By Jenny Foss
My very first “real” job interview after graduating from journalism school was in the town of Three Rivers, Michigan. Nestled in the southwestern corner of my home state, this 7,000-something person town is most certainly quaint. I absolutely loved it. And the job, reporting for the town’s weekly newspaper, appeared to be well within reach. But as the talks became more serious, I freaked. And so I pulled out of the race and found something closer to my hometown of Detroit. Flash forward to today. I’ve evolved from journalist to recruiter and career consultant. Today, I’d be perfectly comfortable coaching my 22-year-old self on how to find a job (or build a business) in a sleepy city like Three Rivers, Michigan. Here’s the advice I would deliver.
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“I Do.” Those two little words can easily signify big changes — a longtime commitment and the beginning of a new phase as two people merge their lives. But when you add student loans to the mix, things can get more complicated. According to a survey on marriage and debt by the National Foundation for Credit Counseling, 37% of respondents said they would not want to marry someone until their debt was completely paid off. No matter which camp you’re in, there are several things you should know about student loans and marriage before you tie the knot.
How much debt are you bringing to the table? Hopefully, by the time you’ve started to talk about building a life together, you already know just how much student loan debt each of you has. If not, it’s important to lay it all out there: Exactly how much debt are you really bringing to the relationship? Also, how have you been dealing with it in the past? If one person has student loan debt and the other doesn’t, it might cause friction in your relationship.
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Your INcome-Driven plan may change If you’re on an income-driven repayment plan for your federal student loans, getting married could affect your payments. If you file your taxes as “married filing jointly,” your income and also that of your spouse will be combined. As a result, your Income-Based Repayment bill could go through the roof. Plus, if you are reporting joint income, you really might not be eligible for certain income driven plans. Why? To qualify for Income-Based Repayment or Pay As You Earn, your monthly payment must be less than what it would be under the Standard Repayment Plan. So, while marriage might seem to reduce your tax bill greatly, you could actually be losing out on some student loan benefits. One option is to file your taxes as “married filing separately,” which typically reduces your student loan bill on an income driven plan as compared to filing jointly. Another option is to consider Income-Contingent Repayment (ICR), which does not have an income eligibility requirement. However, it’s important to look at the big picture to see if it really makes financial sense.
Your spouse could be responsible for your loans In certain situations, your spouse could be responsible for all your student loan debt. While all federal loans and some private loans offer a death discharge if the borrower dies, some private loan lenders might not. So be sure to read the fine print carefully. If you go back to school and your spouse co-signs your loan, he or she will be legally responsible for your debt if you fail to make payments. This could lead to a potential mess in your relationship if not fully talked over beforehand. Even without co-signing, your spouse still might be liable for your student loans. This is the case if you take out a student loan while you’re married and live in a certain community property state like Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington, or Wisconsin. Your spouse also might be responsible for your student loans if they are in default and you have no wages to garnish. Don’t let these things happen to you, take action now while you still have the option to.
Not every lender will allow you to refinance as a joint account If you want to refinance or consolidate your student loans and those of your spouse into one convenient payment, your options are limited. Purefy is currently the only major student loan refinancing bank that offers couple loans. And with this specific option, you can use your combined household income and the higher of your two credit scores to get the best interest rate. That said, you really cannot pursue consolidation for your federal loans as a couple — only as individuals. The same goes for refinancing student loans with other banks. Be sure and keep in mind, however, that if you go from “I do” to “I don’t” and get a divorce, consolidating your loans as a couple together presents many issues. Getting married can be a great, wonderful and logical next step for couples, but it’s important to evaluate how managing student loans and marriage will really work. Before you enter into a legal union, you’ll want to know how student loans will affect your financial union as well.
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Student loans
marriage By Melanie Lockert
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T r av e l
Adventure Awaits! Everything you need to know for your next romantic weekend getaway. By Holly Johnson
Photo by Flo Maderebner
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Romantic
Weekend Getaways t this time of year, it Acan be hard to make time for fun and romance with your partner. Chaos is always around the corner as everyone’s gearing up for Halloween/Thanksgiving/ Christmas/ New Years. The coming few months will be a hectic flash of food, gifts, and relatives that neither you or your partner have seen in at least three years. However, with the thick of winter almost upon us and Valentine’s Day around the corner, you might be dreaming of escaping the chaos for an impromptu, romantic getaway with the
one you love. But where will you go? If you’re on a budget, your options might seem just a bit limited. But don’t fret! The good people here at Thrive are here to help you out with everything. If you just dig a little deeper, you’ll find a ton of cheap and easy options that are both romantic and budget friendly. Luckily, we’ve given you a few good ideas within the next few pages as well. Depending on where you live, you might want to give these ideas a whirl. There’s vacations for every type of fun loving couple.
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Cruises are one of the most budget friendly options out there, and some of the shorter itineraries can be both affordable & romantic.
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The Outdoor Escape You may live near a state or national park, but that doesn’t mean you’ve ever been. A cheap weekend in a cabin, camper, or even a tent may not invoke the idea of romance to you, but it will definitely get you far away from the distracting hustle and bustle of everyday life. And also if you’re looking for a big cheap romantic getaway, well, getting away on the cheap is two-thirds of the goal. There is no reason you can’t add the romance part yourself. If you or your spouse are the outdoorsy type, look for winter deals in the mountains. Sure, the big ski resorts are a bit expensive, but there are other, less pricey ways to have fun in the snow.
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For example, the Appalachian Mountain Club in New England offers winter deals in their cool mountain lodges, Pro Tip where you can enjoy free winter Checking online sites like Travelocity sports like cross and Expedia help to find last minute country skiing cheap hotels. Travelling to cities when or snowshoeing; they are “out of season” means lots of they also offer unfilled hotel rooms that companies lodging and ski need to fill to make a profit, which packages. means big discounts! If you more live out west, a trip to skier’s paradise in Jackson
Hole, Wyoming may even be in order. At Jackson Hole Mountain Resort, they now offering “Ski Free, Stay Free” packages that include free lift tickets, discounts on lodging, and even savings on airfare if you need it. If you want to check out the weather and ski conditions first, check out one of the resort’s live webcams for a nonstop view.
A Romantic Cruise Cruises are one of the most affordable getaway options out there, and some of the shorter itineraries can be both affordable and romantic, as we mentioned above. For example, a three day Carnival cruise to the pretty Bahamas can cost as little as $159 per person plus taxes, gratuities, and also port fees. When you consider the fact that cruises include most or all of your lodging, food, and entertainment, that is one heck of a value. This Carnival cruise departs from Orlando and docks at Nassau, Bahamas for one romantic day on land. You can even depart on a Friday and dock back in Orlando Sunday afternoon, fitting this entire romantic getaway into one quick, amazing weekend.
Since most of your expenses are included, cruises offer a great way to enjoy your loved one without breaking the bank — or going over budget. But if you’re looking for the best deals, make sure to shop around. In addition to other online booking sites, VacationstoGo.com offers huge discounts on dozens of cruises that haven’t sold out. You can even save up to 82% on last-minute cruises with the 90-day ticker. Prices vary depending on where you live – and which cruise port is closest to your home. The good news is, the vast majority of Americans live close enough to a cruise port to drive, and that could mean additional savings on airfare.
Off Season Culture During the cold winter months, most folks are hitting the ski slopes or packing up for warmer climates. Going against the grain can help you score great prices in popular cold-weather cities such as Boston or Chicago. After all, while the cold temperatures will keep the crowds away, the world class restaurants, theaters, and museums in these cities don’t shut down just because it’s chilly out.
Pro Tip
Camping doesn’t always require a tent! If you have a larger SUV you can actually ditch your back seats and slide an air mattress in the back to replace them. Instant camping!
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Going against the grain can help you score great prices in popular cold weather cities.
Chicago: You can often find deals at hotels in downtown Chicago, with rooms on the magnificent mile and right inside downtown. Boston: Stay at the Boston Park Plaza Hotel or Parker House in the heart of downtown Boston, where John F. Kennedy held his bachelor party. Toronto: What’s more romantic than whisking your partner away and out of the country? What’s more, the favorable exchange rate means everything is priced at a built-in discount.
The Beach Retreat Is there anything more romantic than the waves crashing at your feet? Or sitting on a beach balcony sipping on champagne by moonlight? Sounds like it would be expensive, but it doesn’t have to be. If you want to save, get creative. Instead of going for the more traditional hotel experience, browse Airbnb or HomeAway for a vacant condo, bungalow, or apartment you can rent on or near the beach. Not only will you get more room and character than you would from a hotel, but you’ll also
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have a kitchen at your disposal so you can really save money by preparing a few meals at home instead of dining out for every meal. And given the season the prices will be cheaper than in the summer, especially in more northern areas.
Caribbean Dreams If you’re itching for something tropical but don’t yet have a passport, consider a cheap romantic getaway to the U.S. territory of Puerto Rico. Not only will you save an average of $125 per person by not splurging for a passport, but you’ll avoid the hassle of customs and find affordable (often nonstop) flights from many East Coast airports. Puerto Rico is a haven for both lovebirds and adventure seekers. With bioluminescent bays to kayak, amazing white sand beaches, luscious green mountains, and the only tropical rainforest on U.S. territory, the island’s landscape is as diverse as the people who call it home. The Copamarina Beach Resort & Spa, for example, features an affordable couple’s package that includes lodging, daily breakfast, chocolate covered strawberries and sparkling
wine, a one-hour kayak ride, a couple’s massage, and an on site dinner for two with rates starting at $288 per night.
The Winery Weekend You can find wineries in all corners of the U.S., including some unlikely places like in Upstate New York or Michigan. For example, Finger Lakes Wine Country in New York offers several packages that include lodging, breakfast or lunch, and access to an area winery. Prices start at $200, and discounts increase steadily the more nights you stay. Meanwhile, Chateau Chantal in Northern Michigan offers several wine-themed getaway packages for couples for as little as $30 on top of the standard room rate. If you live near the West Coast and want to try something
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different, the Napa Valley Wine Train offers all inclusive overnight stays to a number of the region’s wineries. For example, its Hilton Garden Inn “Wine, Dine and Dream” vacation package includes one- or two-night stays at the Hilton Garden Inn, a gourmet lunch on the train, and also two for one tastings at wineries with the “Taste of the Valley” pass.
Inclusive Getaway If you have already gotten your passport in hand, an all-inclusive trip to the beautiful Caribbean is just a short plane ride away. Most all-inclusive resorts are like other resorts, except for one huge detail: Your meals, drinks (and usually even alcohol), tips, snacks, and entertainment are all included for just one price. This can lead to really huge
savings if you take advantage of everything an all-inclusive resort has to offer, and it certainly makes your trip easier to budget around. What really surprises people is just how affordable that all inclusive resorts can be. If you’re willing to book in the Dominican Republic, Jamaica, or Mexico, for example, you might see prices as low as $900 per week per person –including the cost of your flight and food. Online sites like Expedia and Caribbean.com are awesome places to shop for all of these locations. For an example of the deals that are out there, consider this four-night trip with air to the Riu Montego Bay for $659 per person. That rate includes airfare from a large number of U.S. cities, plus on-site entertainment and even all you can eat and drink. Heck, it even includes supervised daycare at the on site kid’s club.
If you want to go adults-only just to set the mood for more romance, you can do that too. Consider this cheap romantic getaway to the adults-only Barcelo Bavara Beach Port property in Punta Cana. The four-night, all-inclusive trip with air includes lodging on the property with unlimited food and drinks.
Remember, sometimes all inclusive trips are the most romantic of them all. A week without cooking? It doesn’t get any hotter than that.
At Home Adventures Maybe you and your partner really want to find time and money to take a vacation, but you can’t actually get away. Fear no more! There are just a few things that you can do right in the comfort of your own town. We know this doesn’t sound like the most fun thing to do (especially after reading the sections about Puerto Rico and all inclusive resorts), but trust us, it’ll work in a pinch. The great thing about this type of “vacation” (or should we say stay-cation) is that it is probably the cheapest option on the list for obvious reasons. Our suggestion for this type of relaxation is just make a set of time where you spend time only with your spouse or life partner. In lieu of a vacation where you would typically go somewhere and try not to spend too much money, stay home and spend your money on the things you never do because they are “too expensive”. Get a nice couple’s massage, wear your fanciest clothes and go to the most upscale restaurant in your area, and take a horseback riding class together. Another bonus to vacationing this way is that you can also choose how long or short the “vacation” will be and not have to worry about rising hotel costs. Make a day of doing cool things together or an entire weekend - the choice is yours! The main thing is that you are spending some much needed time with your partner. One thing is for sure, when you’re with the one you love, you really don’t need much to have a good time!
Instagram Inspiring
Couples
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@freelancehoneymoon Freelance designers who travel the world as a year long extension of their honeymoon!
@followmeaway This couple does photography abroad and absolutely ROCKS it.
@vacationCouple Kristin and Shadi are travelling filmmakers and brand ambassadors for several resorts.
@bruisedpassports Savi and Vid are full time travel bloggers and have been travelling exclusively for over 12 years!
@wheninroaming These two roam the world and work in advertising. They started taking small jobs and now work for major brands all over the world.
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Here’s how you can visit the set of
Hocus POcus Phillips Elementary School “The opening scenes of the film, featuring Binx as an actual human prior to his cursing as a cat, were filmed in Pioneer Village,” the town of Salem’s website describes. “Pioneer Village was built in 1930, and is America’s first living history museum. The tours of the village are offered seasonally through September, and today the park is home to different events and festivals throughout the year.” The town suggests visitors looking to recreate the path of the Sanderson sisters go and see the outside facade of the Phillips Elementary School building.
Old Burial Hill Other locations include 4 Ocean Ave (Max and Dani’s house in the movie), as well as Old Burial Hill, which was where all the graveyard scenes were shot. But, this one is tricky as it is actually in neighboring Marblehead, Massachusetts. Still, it’s worth visiting as it also happens to be one of the oldest graveyards in New England.
ROpes Mansion Next, the town says, head to the Ropes mansion, which played the part of Allison’s house. Follow that with a stop at the Old Town Hall where the classic party scene takes place and Bette Midler famously sings her rendition of “Put a Spell on You.”
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T h e s tag e s of vacationing with your partner for the first time
Aside from meeting their parents and saying ‘I love you’ for the first time, jet setting with your beau is a huge (and super fun) step in the relationship. After lots of research and deliberation, you decide your destination and book the trip. You endure extreme anticipation for what feels like years, but then it’s finally time to pack… Once you arrive at the airport, you have to wait in the longest security line you’ve ever seen. But before you know it, you’re boarding the planE and you don’t have to sit next to weird strangers!
…which makes you realize bae’s shoulder is the ideal napping pillow. You land at the airport and now it’s time to wait in line for your rental car. You make a few wrong turns on the road and start to get frustrated… …but finally arrive at the hotel, calm down, and get settled in your room. Now it’s time to decide where to eat because you’re both pretty hangry at this point.
Once you’re both restored to your full and happy states, it’s time to hit the beach together. After a day in the sun, it’s time to eat again (obviously). You think about exploring the area after dinner, but ultimately decide to go to bed, because you’re exhausted. You do it all again for a few more days…
… until you have to pack up and head back to the airport. Now that you’re home, all you can do is dream about your next vacation with bae.
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Tips Tricks
for packing light
Pack in a hard-shell case
Have you seen the way airline employees sling your suitcase around when they’re moving luggage to and from the terminal? If not, don’t look it may scare you. In order to keep the stuff you have packed from breaking, try to pack in a more durable suitcase.
Pack Basics
If you aren’t going to be able to wear it more than once, chances are it’s not worth the room it’s going to take up in your bag. Packing simple outfit pieces that can be layered gives you the ability to layer outfits and wear the same piece multiple ways.
Roll, Don’t Fold
I don’t know why I ever folded clothes to begin with. Not only does rolling clothes create more space, but it also helps reduce wrinkles in your clothing. And, in the end it makes a lot of your clothes easier to find within your bag.
Wear Your heaviest shoes
I got this tip from my Dad. It makes your bag lighter and creates more space.
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This is what I call a “duh” article. I do recognize that I’m probably writing about stuff we all should already know… but sometimes we need a reminder. As we were preparing for my week and a half long trip to Germany to celebrate my husband’s birthday, my father warned him of my crazy packing habits. Yes, I’m that girl who tends to over pack, although I like to think of it as being prepared. With lots of airlines now charging extra fees, I knew I had to get break this habit…and fast. Here’s how I did.
Wear your accessories
Not only does wearing accessories like hats, sunglasses, or jewelry free up room in your suitcase, it also ensures that those things won’t be crushed in your checked bag.
Travel Storage Bags I used the travel space bags for our dirty clothes and travel blanket. I found it to be very helpful in unpacking, because the clean clothes never mixed with the dirty clothes. Also, when you get home clothes can go straight from these bags into the washer.
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Article by Emily Cappiello Fly on Holidays
Traveling when business season slows down means you may be able to score business class airfare for a cheap economy price.
Utilize Your
Visit the Tourism Office
Happy Hour
They know about everything going on in town. They can point you to free activities, special events happening during your stay, and everything in between.
Five-star hotels may not be in the budget, you can still have luxury by visiting an upscale venue around cocktail hour time.
Travel hacks that get you more for your money
Travel to New Destinations
Stay at a New Hotel
Choosing an up and coming destination can allow you to save big on travel without compromising too much.
New hotels are looking for customers and reviews and will do whatever it takes to get you to book a stay.
Find Where Locals Eat
Finding that local gem of a restaurant gets you an amazing meal without the premium hotel restaurant prices.
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N O M I N AT E D F O R 1 1 E M M Y S I N C L U D I N G O U T S TA N D I N G D R A M A S E R I E S 78
SEASON PREMIERE
S E P T 2 6 | T U E S DAY S 9 / 8 c AFTER THE VOICE Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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Witty Insta Captions
for Every Type of Fall Photo
Funny I never want to leaf this place Unbeleafable Boo Felicia Fall so hard May the forest be with you
Thanksgiving Oh my gourd, I ate way too much turkey. Thanksgiving with my favorite turkeys! Gobble baby gobble baby gobble baby gobble *Insert music and/or turkey emoji*
Cute Autumn leaves & pumpkins, please! I never met a pumpkin I didn’t like Lets get smashed This world is on FIYAAAA *Insert fire & leaf emoji* (Thanks, Alicia Keys)
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adults-only
Cambridge Beaches Resort
The top 10
Vacation spots By Oyster Articles
The greatest locales for couples, empty nesters, and those hoping for a quieter getaway.
Jade Mountain Resort St. Lucia
Auberge du soleil napa county
Romantic? Undoubtedly. Unique? Absolutely. Expensive? For sure. Through an innovative, open fourth wall, each of Jade’s 29 enormous suites overlooks the sea from its chromatherapy-lit whirlpool tub, canopied bed, and private infinity pool. Getting to Jade Mountain can be tedious, but its organic cuisine, doting service, unwavering silence (no TVs, radios, or children), and also an extraordinary design make the long journey completely worthwhile and amazing.
The 50-room luxury Auberge du Soleil is one of the most exclusive destinations in California wine country.
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landscaped grounds that meet four private beaches, and features a spectacular spa, an acclaimed restaurant, a current lap pool, and airy rooms with beach-y décor that will put you in standby mode as soon as you set foot in them.
tropical grounds. The hotel lures couples and groups of friends with its fine dining options overlooking the sea, spacious rooms with plush king beds, and highly elegant atmosphere.
Secrets Marquis Los Cabos
Despite its intimate size, it has all the amenities of a larger resort: a 7,000-square foot luxury spa, a lovely pool, and a Michelin-star restaurant. Views of the surrounding countryside are phenomenal, the grounds are lush and peaceful, and the homey rooms all come with huge terraces It’s a truly special retreat.
With its sleek, hacienda-style rooms, giant soaking tubs, and a serene vibe, the Secrets Marquis is a wonderful pick for those looking to get some relaxing ‘we’ time with their significant other. Nervewrecking bosses, stressful jobs, and the bustling city life will feel a world apart in the hotel’s three pools, oceanfront spa, and gorgeous beach.
Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa Bermuda
Fairmont Royal Pavilion Barbados
The luxurious Cambridge Beaches & Resort is nestled in 30 acres of beautifully
The colonial-style Fairmont is located right on a postcard stretch of sand and 11 acres of
Excellence Playa Mujeres Cancun The Excellence Playa Mujeres includes dozens of daily activities, a world class spa, seven pools, nine restaurants, 11 bars, a yoga and Pilates studio, contemporary rooms with upscale amenities, private terraces with day beds, a sandy beach with palm trees and cabanas...the question is, what’s not to love about this hotel?
freebies abound: breakfast, Wi-Fi, a mini spa treatment (to name a few). Keep your eyes peeled for iguanas, sloths, and the like.
Travaasa Austin Austin, Texas
Sandals Royal Plantation Jamaica The quiet and classy property of the Sandals Royal Plantation comprises 77 oceanfront rooms with canopied beds, a gorgeous private beach, a golf course, the best food in all of the Ocho Rios area, and insanely attentive service. It’s low-key and luxurious; the perfect place to indulge, be it in the top-notch spa or on a lounger by the pool.
Travaasa Austin is set on its own nature preserve on a hilltop amid forested canyons, 20 miles west of downtown Austin. Its 72 rooms are housed in seven buildings built on three different levels, with correspondingly different views from their balconies. Hiking trails, an infinity-edge pool enclosed by a wooden deck, a luxurious spa, and a restaurant with panoramic views are just some of the amenities providing inspiration and relaxation for visitors. It’s far from the city’s downtown core, but that’s probably why most guests are looking to stay here.
Gaia Hotel and Reserve Costa Rica Tucked into the hillside of a 14-acre nature reserve, Gaia Hotel and Reserve feels appropriately exclusive and private, personalized service to match. Rooms are spacious and airy; the great views are never-ending; and the
Rumor Las Vegas in Las Vegas Rumor Resort promises guests a hip, intimate, and above all, sexy experience off the Strip. With bold, quirky design that’s heavy on the purple, 150 rooms (many with balconies or patios, some with two-person tubs), a pool and bar open 24 hours, and lots of freebies, it delivers.
The very best red wine
Have a blast at any of these five star quality resorts without worrying about pesky kids or teenagers being annoying or taking up the entire pool. Thrive Magazine • fall 2017
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