EYDIS
April 2017
Authentic Living
magazine
Dare To Dream
Debbi Dachinger
EYDIS Authentic Living
Warrior Woman Goddess of the Island
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Maria Savoy
C O N T R I B U T E R S
The founder of Eydis, has been in the marketing and media arena for over 20 years, owning five businesses and selling two of those. She creates local magazines as well as publishing a global magazine creating an awareness around articles that are empowering and inspirational. As an Author and Prosperity Coach, Maria helps others to live the life they desire.
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EYDIS Authentic Living
magazine
Eydis magazine is a monthly publication and makes every effort to provide accurate information in advertising, editorial content and placement: however, we cannot make any claims as to the accuracy of information provided by advertisers or editorial contributors and will accept no responsibility or liability for inaccurate information or placement. No content can be duplicated without the permission of Eydis Media. For inquiries e-mail info@eydisauthenticliving.com.
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Patrick Andries Kathryn Andries The Dream Experts
Mella Barnes
Liz Bull
Amanda Butler
Sharon Carne
Annabel Cohen
Wini Curley
Liberty Forrest
Tamara Green
Elaine Grohman
Judy Lipson
Lisa Marie Platske
Ellen Rogin
Pat Duckworth
Charmaine Hammond & Rebecca Kirstein
Lisa Lapides Sawicki
Kate Sholonski
Janette Stuart
Gary Stuart
eydisauthenticliving.com 11
from the publisher Life is an amazing journey, breath in all its goodness. I read a book last week written by Rebecca Rosen, an internationally renowned best-selling author, spiritual medium, teacher and inspirational speaker. “What the DEAD have taught me about LIVING WELL.” It’s a fascinating book about her “normal” life with her seemingly perceived (by some) “abnormal” gift. Rebecca talks to the dead.
Throughout her book, Rebecca references signs that give us nuggets of information from the universe (our guides) that we can incorporate into our own lives if we are open and aware enough to see them. What I love most about her book is that she shares how in her “human” life, her conflicts and controversies are not so different from our own.
Signs From The Universe I have my own way of recognizing the signs that show up for me in my daily life. My signs tend to come in numbers or show up as birds. Seeing repeated numbers are one of the easiest ways that our guides and angels can communicate with us as long as we are open and aware.
As For Birds, Here Is What They Mean To Me Bald Eagle Reach higher and become more than you believe you are capable of. Be patient with the present and know that the future holds great possibilities; you are about to take flight.
Have you ever experienced a sequence of numbers that tend to show up many times throughout your days, weeks or months? You look at the clock and it’s 1:11, wake in the middle of the night at 1:11, your receipt was $11.11 or you see a phone number that is 561-1113? All of these 1’s are telling you something, so take note. Be aware of your thoughts right in the moment of seeing these sequences and you will begin to see the connection. A dear friend, writer, business owner, and spiritual medium, Adria DeAngelis Veit, lost her battle with cancer last December. I miss her every day. I will never forget a conversation I had with Adria one spring day just after filling my gas tank. The amount read, $44.44 when Adria called. I expressed how cool I thought it was to see that sequence of numbers and Adria said to me, that’s a sign that your angels are all around you and that you are protected. That they are offering you positive energies and inner strength in that moment, and to be aware of what your were thinking about, as it most likely pertained to that. I remember being in deep thought as the gas flowed into my car planning my exit strategy from a horrible marriage, so as you can imagine that was very comforting and timely for me. I continued to see multiple 4’s and a couple months later, I successfully left.
Owl Intuition, the ability to see what others cannot. The owl will guide you to uncover hidden potential and abilities.
Throughout the years, I perfected my consciousness around numbers and became increasingly aware of the birds that were showing up in my life as being directional intuitive nuggets.
Hawk Clear-sightedness; blessings, blessings and more blessings. Be aware that God is speaking to you so take notice, only you know what the message is.
The sequence of 2’s That everything will turn out for your highest good, keep the faith and stay strong to your personal truths.
Robin New growth and renewal in many areas of your life. Move forward with grace, faith, and trust, it is time to believe in yourself. Make a wish, be patient and watch it come true. Wood Pecker Opportunity is knocking. Be very aware of what is going on in your life when you see or hear this amazing bird.
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Here are some signs and how they resonate with me. The sequence of 1’s New beginnings; take note of your thoughts, for you are manifesting them into your life.
The sequence of 3’s That your prayers and wishes are being heard and that your guides wish to assist you in your endeavors as you are serving your life purpose. The sequence of 4’s That your angels surround and protect you offering positive energies and inner strength. The sequence of 5’s It is a message that it is time to let go of the old that no longer positively serves you. Trust that all is well. The sequence of 6’s Opportunities will present themselves and that all your material and financial needs will be met. The sequence of 7’s This is a highly spiritual number. It is a message that you are on the right path and living your purpose. The sequence of 8’s Indicates that financial abundance is on its way. The sequence of 9’s That a phase in your life may be coming to an end but not to fear as you are being prepared for a wonderful new beginning. I once had a receipt that was $99.99, it was a really great message for me.
Maria Savoy – Publisher maria.eydismedia@gmail.com mariasavoy.com
To e n i z a g a M ing v i L c i t n e h t Au s i d y E g n i y r t B i n u m m o C Your Local BU 7 R g n 2 / y l . t i http://b F UGYj8HBs ore from
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ess Planet
feature
page 18
Debbie Dachinger Dare To Dream
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Eydis Living 26 Spring Forward 30 What Do You Do With the Miracle That Is You? 36 Servant Leadership 38 Why Boundaries Are Necessary, Healthy and Loving 42 Room for Joy
Self-Growth
Simply Spiritual
Wealth Consciousness
46 How to Handle Criticism
74 The Spirit of Your Business
50 Pulling the Weeds Create the Freedom Within You
78 The Dream Experts What Does Your Dream Mean
92 How Much Is Enough When It Comes To Your Money?
56 The Only Constant Is Change 58 Establishing Boundaries 64 Self-Coach Yourself To Become the Best You Can Be
82 Talk to Tamara Doubtful 84 3 Tips to Get Your Long-Term Goals to Bloom
Healthy Living 98 Let Me Hear Your Body Talk 102 Beauty & the Brunch
88 Feeling Worthy and Being Enough
68 Spring Into Action!
April 2017
Debbi Dachinger
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Dream Dare To
by Maria Savoy
W
hen you were young, have you ever dreamt of being a famous singer, or in a band? How about an actor/actress, a superstar on the radio, or TV announcer, interviewing other famous people, perhaps on the red carpet? Childhood dreams are exciting, but as we grow older, life seems to move us in all different directions, forcing us to tuck our dreams neatly away in the hopes that they will reimmerge someday. Now enter stage left, Debbi Dachinger, a real-life dream achiever. Debbi is a Media Personality, known for being in the spotlight as a syndicated, award-winning radio host. She is at home in front of the TV camera, interviewing celebs on the red carpet. She is a live stream event host, keynote and presentation speaker, as well as writing bestselling books.
Debbi is an actress, a singer, a professional voice over artist, a coach, a strategist, an expert interviewer. She is a true visionary who is a certified coach, an expert with clients worldwide seeking her inspired wisdom and expertise in success and radio/book media. Debbi teaches her clients that anything is possible and helps them to bring their dreams to life. Her talents lend to helping others to become bestselling authors, an advisor through coaching and strategy, on how to be interviewed through proper messaging, to be seen and heard on media for big business results. As the industry’s leading lady, Debbi puts the ‘motivation’ back into broadcasting with her cutting-edge talk show, and her multi-award winning ‘DARE TO DREAM’ radio show,
syndicated on 66 stations. ‘DARE TO DREAM’ enlightens and entertains listeners all over the world with Debbi’s lively personality and engaging experts. You can download the free iTunes app called “Dare to Dream with Debbi Dachinger,” to hear the radio show, or go to http://debbidachinger.com/ interviews Among many of her talents, Debbi offers a Bestseller Book Launch program for those who have the desire to self-publish; she has a program for authors, where she teaches how they can reach a bestselling status. Debbi also runs MyBestsellerBook. com a service that guarantees the international bestseller book ranking for writers. She also offers Radio Mastery training for those who want to excel and become savvy, successful and superb interviewers on air. Debbi is the author of eydisauthenticliving.com 19
‘WISDOM TO SUCCESS’: The Surefire Secrets to Accomplish All Your Dreams, and ‘DARE TO DREAM’: This Life Counts, and the co-author of “PR Magnet: Create Best Selling Books and Attract Free Radio Interviews.” “I do what I love to do, and you can too!” Debbi enthusiastically shares.
Born For Greatness Debbi was a natural in the art of acting and singing, at a very young age. “I have been doing this my whole life, I was born for this. As a little girl singing and dancing, this is all I’ve every wanted to do.” Debbi shares. As accomplished and outgoing as Debbi is now, growing up, she felt awkward, introverted, invisible and unheard. With an absent father and a working single mother who was trying to make ends met, Debbi felt lonely and deeply desired to
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feel special and to be heard. Debbi expresses, “I didn’t feel I had any power of speech worth hearing, and perceiving that I was different than others my age, I struggled a lot as a child.” Later in life, moving from New York to California, Debbi performed in the theater all over the world, was on television, acted in commercials, was hired to do voiceover work for cartoons, and loved every minute of it. Busy fulfilling her dreams, it wasn’t until later in life that Debbi married, sending her into the next phase of her life, and her desire to fulfill her dream of having a child. It was after some failed attempts that Debbi found herself having to seek treatment from fertility doctors. “I was having a very difficult time. I went through a grueling 3 ½ years of fertility treatments, and one of the things the
doctors had asked of me, was to slow down. They expressed it was in my best interest to create a calm life for myself, they asked me to stop exercising, which for someone who has a lot of energy like I do, was quite difficult. So, in that incubation period of 3 ½ years, I felt I went a little stir crazy,” Debbi shares Having to come to terms with the fact that she suffered miscarriages, she grieved and surrendered the idea to conceive. Since she had suppressed her creativity for many years, Debbi found herself in the position of having to recreate her life.
Letting Go of the Old and Creating New By opening her heart and mind to new experiences, the most amazing opportunities began to show up in her life. Having the courage to embrace this new world and by saying “YES”
to them, changed her life. She found that every time she said “YES” it led her to the next amazing experience which led to the next amazing one and so on. “Today I can look back on what my experiences were, and although I could never have predicted this, those experiences lead me to where I am today. What I do know is that through my experiences, I was “meant” for this. For each of us, our wounds, if we heal them, became our gifts to the world. My wound was feeling
I was not seen or heard and therefore I didn’t believe that I was special, so in healing that wound, it became my gift. I’m the consultant who works with clients to unearth their unique message to the world, and I see them as the special and brilliant people that they are.” Debbi explains.
Stepping Into Your Greatness Debbi works with all kind of people on all different levels in their journey. “All of us have
something important to share with the world. By allowing it to shine I help others no matter what stage of their journey they are on. I have helped beginners to seasoned entrepreneurs that seek my expertise.” Debbi conducts VIP one days, teaches coaching, masterminding, and works with beginners to accomplished people who are looking to create something more in their life. Debbi brings clarity to everyone she works with. “The bottom line is, I create
eydisauthenticliving.com 21
“Who is Debbi Dachinger? If you haven’t heard of her you will trust me. I know her as the next Oprah. Debbi is passionate powerful and compassionate. Debbi is a unique one of a kind onair personality who believes in human kindness are equal in every way to the kindnesses Oprah has extended to people down through the years. I discovered Debbi quite by accident and have found listening to her radio show to be quite addictive. She is smart, articulate and speaks with a passion about the human spirit that I rarely hear on talk radio anymore. After listening to her Radio show I always come away feeling lighter and brighter and more enthusiastic about my life, my goals, and my Dreams. Not many people touch my soul the way Debbi does. She inspires her listening audience and people like myself to greatness and not many people can do that. Debbi is definitely my new Oprah!” —Frederick Zappone
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dreams; I am a Certified Dream Coach. It’s about turning our soul’s purpose into our reality.”
Dare to Dream Syndicated Radio Show 2017 is a bucket list year for Debbi, this is the year that she has booked interviews with those who have made a notable difference in their industry. She has the remarkable job of bringing transformational thought leaders together who are making huge contributions and changing the world by their leadership, expertise, and wisdom. “I have found that when I have that level of conscious conversation, I am so juiced up afterward, that it actually takes me 24 hours to come down. The level of conversation I am privileged to engage in with these leaders and visionaries often feels like a “master class.” To have a transformational giant in my presence and to be able to ask them anything is an incredible experience. They are so generous with their knowledge.” Many inspirational and influential leaders that Debbi has had on her show, have become friends. These are friends that she respects and treasures. Debbi humbly believes that it is very important to be connected to and nurture those
relationships she has made through her many avenues of talents. The 2017 “Dare to Dream” talk radio line up is an absolutely a ‘must’ listen to; if you would like to receive news of Debbi’s upcoming shows, visit her website at debbidachinger.com to keep informed. Her shows will leave you inspired and empowered and will also provide you with tips on how you too can live the life of your dreams.
New Adventures
Life is forever evolving and fun opportunities are always yet to be had. In Debbi’s spare time she is exploring her love for the knowledge of wine. She has taken her interest to a new level: She has taken Wine Tasting class, Wine and Food Pairing class, has become a Certified Spanish Wine Specialist and is about to be tested for her Italian Wine Specialist Certification. “I love wine! I’ve taken several wine courses and I am half way through my Master Spanish Wine Certification course. Learning about wine is a beautiful skill and I’m loving that dream.” There is no doubt that Debbi’s zest for life and passion for the experiences will continue to enhance her life. She lives her life on purpose and boldly moves forward forever, creating dreams.
Debbi’s Best Advice “The more daring your accomplishments, the more people there are that are going to doubt you. I have experienced people who had a lot of doubt about my dreams, and the most interesting thing I have found is that when you express your plans, you can actually see the doubt in the faces of others. “You’re going to what!? Where!?” I use their doubt as a motivator because when you continue to break down those barriers and start
accomplishing what you had set out to do, others begin to believe in you, and that is when they become inspired by you. “ “Keep “DARING” to live your dreams. The more you experience fear when creating your dream, the more you know you are heading in the right direction. Don’t try to appeal to everyone, or you will appeal to no one. Find your niche and define your message, if you create a clean line of what you have to offer, then it’s easy for your message to be successfully received.”
Awards and Accolades: Editor’s Pick: Featured Intriguing Creator, Broadcasting Industry Lifetime Achievement Award, and inducted into the Who’s Who Hall of Fame for Entertainment. Winner of Successful Achievements from Voices of Women Worldwide, recipient of Heart and Spirit Award from the Evolutionary Business Council. Debbi is an International speaker with an inspirational video channel at: YouTube.com/debontheradio http://debbidachinger.com http://mybestsellerbook.com http://MediaMasteryRadio.com eydisauthenticliving.com 23
Authentic Living
Forward SPRING by Pat Duckworth
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I
t is that time of year when shafts of sunlight illuminate dust motes in the air and thoughts turn to Spring cleaning. Spring cleaning isn’t just about brightening up your home, it is also good for your emotional health, preparing the way for personal growth in the new season. This can be your opportunity to declutter. Most of us have more items in our homes that we haven’t used or worn for years. Having too much redundant stuff around you can make you feel stifled and stressed. “Clutter is not just physical stuff, it’s old ideas, toxic relationships, and bad habits” – Eleanor Brown
Stop now and think, ‘Could my old possessions be holding me back from personal growth?’ ‘Am I ready to let go and spring forward?’ Decluttering can activate your internal gremlins. Your gremlins are those emotional parts of you that give you negative messages and unhelpful thoughts that stop you from taking positive action. You will need to become aware of your gremlins and use strategies to deal with them. Meet some of the most common Decluttering Gremlins
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1. The ‘My Stuff is My Personality’ Gremlin Your personality is who you are, not what you have. Your possessions are a reflection of your personality. Decluttering is not about banishing your personality and taking on the persona of someone else such as your minimalist friend. This is about transforming your space so that it works for you. This Gremlin can be a particular problem when you are decluttering your wardrobe. To overcome it ake all of the clothes out of your wardrobe and divide them into three piles: clothes I wear regularly, special occasion outfits and clothes I haven’t worn for over twelve months. Look at the clothes you wear regularly and notice the things they have in common. It is
likely that these are the clothes that you know suit you best and you look good in. Take a long hard look at the clothes you haven’t worn for over a year. How many of them could you send to the charity shop? If these clothes really express your personality why aren’t you wearing them? If you are keeping some clothes for that day when your weight changes then trust me, fashion is moving on all of the time and you will want new clothes to celebrate the new you. 2. The ‘Guilt’ Gremlin There are many good reasons to hold onto possessions but guilt isn’t one of them. It is a useless emotion. It involves feelings of responsibility or remorse for some real or imagined offense or wrong. Here are a few
examples of thoughts from the Guilt Gremlin: •
I paid a lot of money for it.
•
It was a gift
•
It seems such a waste
•
It has so many memories
•
I know I will regret it in years to come
In order to overcome guilt, it is important to recognize the emotion and learn to move on from it. There is no need to punish yourself over inanimate objects. You may need to step back for a short while from the decluttering process and to discover the real reason behind your feelings. One way to do this is to write down your feelings so that you can process them in a more objective way. It can help you release the negative energy associated with your possessions. 3. The ‘Do It Tomorrow’ Gremlin Putting things off or procrastinating is an indicator of the freeze response to a perceived fear. If you find yourself
procrastinating then the benefits of decluttering may be outweighed by a fear you have about letting go of your possessions. To defeat the Do It Tomorrow Gremlin start with thinking about all of the
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benefits of decluttering such as having more space, being able to work more efficiently, making way for something you need, creating an opportunity to redesign or decorate. These benefits are your motivation so make them really big and exciting. Now become aware of what the fear is that is associated with letting go of your old stuff. It may be one of the other gremlins so take a good look at them. Once you have identified your fear, think about how you can let it go. Keep your glorious image of your decluttered space in front of you. “Later is the best friend of clutter” – Peter Walsh Let go of the unhelpful thoughts or nothing will be achieved. 4. The ‘This Is Not My Problem’ Gremlin If you live with other people or share workspace the stuff cluttering up the shared space may not all be yours. If it belongs to your partner or your children you will need to collaborate with them in your decluttering process. Your young people’s rooms are their territory and it is not your role to declutter them. That is their decision although you could point out the benefits of creating more space. You could incentivize them if it is important to you. If your young people are on their way to college or
university, it can be a great opportunity to spend together, decluttering their room before they leave. It can help them to realize they are about to embark on independent living and do not need to hold onto many of their childhood items. 5. The ‘It’s All Too Much for Me’ Gremlin If you are thinking about decluttering your whole house it can seem like an insurmountable task. This Gremlin will tell you that you are bound to fail if you start. If you set a goal that is too big you will not complete it and then you will lose confidence in yourself. The best way to approach decluttering is to break it down into manageable chunks. For example, you could start by setting yourself a goal for decluttering the bedroom in a month. Break that down into
smaller goals for each week such as wardrobes, drawers and storage boxes. Commit to spending at least ten minutes every day decluttering the area you have chosen for that week. Remember you don’t have to do all of your decluttering in one day. The important thing is to set yourself a goal and then plan achievable steps to move towards it. Everything you do is a success and will silence the Gremlin. 6. The ‘I might Throw Away Something Important’ Gremlin This Gremlin is generally associated with paperwork. Whatever happened to the ‘paperless society’? I am sure I have more paperwork around the house now than I have ever had. Documents can clutter up your drawers and filing cabinets and make things you need difficult to find.
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WHAT DO YOU DO WITH THE MIRACLE THAT IS
You? by Elaine M. Grohman
C
ountless times around the world, throughout any given day, people are asked a provocative question. “What do you do?� This simple question is often
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perceived as a qualifier, a label of worth that implies economic status, class distinction and often, human value. Generally, in the eyes of the one asking the question.
This simple question is far from simple. This inquiry can evoke a variety of responses and can be perceived as either an interrogation, an empty conversation starter,
feel like a judgment, invoking self-doubt, insecurity, and feelings of lessened self-worth. One simple question can cause one individual to brag about their accomplishments, and another to dwell on opportunities lost or presumed out of their reach. This simple question can elicit the range of emotional responses from unabashed bravado to insecurity to genuine, humble modesty. The question, “What do you do?” should never to be asked as a qualifier of value, worth or accomplishment. If asked for its honest purpose, the question might be, “What is your livelihood? How much money do you make? Where do you live? Where were you educated? What value can you bring to me?” The list can go on and on. But the question, “What do you DO?” could have far greater implications in the improvement of Life on this Planet if the emphasis was directed in a different way. The emphasis on the word “DO” in this question has a far greater impact when one asks the question of themselves and not another.
or as genuine interest from the questioner. For some it might open the floodgates of an inflated ego, inviting one to begin to list accolade upon accolade of presumed
value based upon supposed importance when status, initials gained, and economic position is communicated. For others, this question might
Each Human Being is blessed with a Spirit, the unseen animator of the physical, emotional and intellectual apparatus you know as yourself. The Spirit is housed within the Body, while simultaneously being beyond the Body. The Spirit directs the Body, responding to the Emotional
eydisauthenticliving.com 31
navigator within, steering us towards understanding, or leading away from understanding, all dependent upon the choices we make. Spirit is both the animator and the observer, the gentle nudge that asks that we choose goodness over harm.
they are meant to be? Do you use them as weapons of manipulation and wounding towards yourself and other, or do you use your Emotions with integrity to uplift, encourage and create new and impactful changes that would contribute to the whole?
Each Human Being is blessed with a Body. What do you DO with the Body that is yours? Do you care for it, respect its incredible complexity, honor the enormity of challenges it overcomes every day? What do you DO with your Body? Do you abuse it, or do you appreciate the miracle of it? What do you DO as you consciously interact with the world around you through the Body known as you?
Each Human Being is blessed with a Mind. The varieties are endless, from the creative genius to the seemingly silent observer, each as unique and as precious as the next. Do you use your Mind to bring insights, comprehension, learning and greater potentials or do you use it for the destruction of yourself or others? It all depends on what you DO with your Mind.
Each Human Being is blessed with an internal navigation device known as Emotions. What do you DO with your Emotions? Do you use them as the guidance system that 32 | Eydis Magazine
Each Human Being is blessed with a Self. Your unique and singular personhood has never been here, in exactly the same way – Ever! You are extraordinary, one of a kind, and capable of adding to or subtracting from the whole. It all
depends on what you DO with the moments you are given, the opportunities that Life provides, the actions that you choose to take, the words that you elect to use, the silent thoughts that direct you. What do you DO? With everything, every opportunity, every encounter, every gift with everything. And at the end of the day, or at the end of your Life, ask this question instead, “What did I Do with my Life?” Or better yet, ask right now.
Elaine Grohman is a speaker, author, energy healer and angel reader. She has a private practice in Farmington, MI. For appointments please contact Lainie Rubio at 248.320.6532 or visit her website at www.elainegrohman.com
“Faith Is Taking The Step Even When You Don’t See The Whole Staircase.” – Martin Luther King Jr.
Sometimes it’s not about seeing the whole staircase, it’s about taking the next step.
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Working with a coach helps you to move forward in a faster, bigger way than ever imagined. It creates accountability, gives you access to knowledge and tools you may not have and moves you into your magnificence. You are talented! You are Brilliant! You are UNSTOPPABLE! Visit mariasavoy.com to learn more and receive 5 steps to creating a miraculous life.
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FOR MORE INFORMATION AND WAYS TO HELP GO TO 34 | Eydis Magazine STCLAIRBUTTERFLYFOUNDATION.ORG
C.H.A.N.G.E. Creating Hope and Awareness and Nurturing Growth through Empowerment The St. Clair Butterfly Foundation was founded to inspire a movement of C.H.A.N.G.E. by providing all children and youths with the tools to overcome any adversity and help them to realize their full potential to soar! Based in Oakland County Michigan, this nonprofit organization offers: Community Outreach Programs Creative Art Programs Scholarship Programs Legislative Initiatives Your donation goes directly to helping kids find their voice The St. Clair Butterfly Foundation has successfully helped to change laws in several states to better protect children.
Each year 1-in-4 girls and 1-in-6 boys are victims of abuse. Let’s help these children find their voice. Founded in 2007 by Chip and Lisa St. Clair, and based on his bestselling memoir, The Butterfly Garden, the St. Clair Butterfly Foundation utilizes the power of creative arts, literature, and overall well-being to impact the lives of children facing adversity. Listen to Chip and Lisa’s radio show: The Divine Frequency: Turning Your Passion Into Purpose Tuesday at 9:30 am Eastern Time on Empower Radio
Your donation gives the greatest gift to a child! 35 It shows that they are loved and that they deserveeydisauthenticliving.com to be heard.
SERVANT LEADERSHIP:
WHY IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO LEAD IN LIFE, LOVE, AND BUSINESS by Charmaine Hammond and Rebecca Kirstein
Exactly what is servant leadership? Servant leadership isn’t about power or hierarchy. It’s about collaboration and partnership. And every organization needs leadership. We all know what happens to a ship when someone 36 | Eydis Magazine
isn’t at the helm — it sinks. Having a captain that stands at the helm and barks orders at everyone will get the job done. Sometimes, it’ll even get the job done well. The problem is that nobody is having any fun in that scenario. Nobody is communicating, learning, and sharing knowledge and responsibility. It doesn’t leave
anyone any room to grow. Not for the deckhands, nor the captain, nor anyone in between. You see, when “the boss” is the boss, it puts everyone beneath them—it doesn’t build teams, growth, or community. Servant leadership allows space for everyone to shine. It encourages sharing knowledge, resources, and
when people have room for growth and have fun at work? They work harder and longer, they invest time and energy, and they build community at work. Where people build community, they grow roots. When people grow roots, they don’t even think about pulling up those roots in search of greener pastures. After working with 100’s of businesses over the years, we built our team at Raise a Dream on the shared belief that of all of the “problems” that business owners come to us to “fix,” it almost always boiled down to the same fundamental issue: leadership. If you were to choose one issue to focus on when your business is struggling, it should (more often than not) be leadership. The very meaning of the word leadership needs to be redefined. The dictionary defines leadership as “the action of leading a group of people or organization.” Synonyms include directorship, governorship, administration, captaincy, control, supremacy, rule, command, power, dominion, and influence. responsibility between all levels of any organization. It fosters growth and creativity. It not only allows for failure but it also encourages it. Because as any good leader knows, failure inevitably leads to innovation. It’s an environment that makes room for work to be creative, sometimes messy and often FUN. Do you know what happens
Well, none of that sounds very appealing, does it? We believe in leading through compassion—not only in business but also in politics, parenting, and education. Leadership needs to become synonymous with collaboration, cooperation, kindness, generosity, community, engagement, creativity, and
innovation. We want to live in a world where people work together to achieve their own personal definitions of success. When you lift as you climb, you feel good about being part of the success of others around you. You actually learn from their successes and failures and they learn from yours. It is our mission to lead others to success through collaboration and also to build a company for our team in which we can thrive as individuals and as a business. We support the “crazy” notion that you can help others at the same time as you help yourself. With servant-leadership, the lines between “the employer” and “the employee” are blurred in the same way that, for us, the lines between work and play are blurred. And we wouldn’t have it any other way.
Charmaine Hammond is an expert in collaboration, communication and conflict management. Together with business partner Rebecca Kirstein (serial entrepreneur and marketing expert), their brand Raise A Dream helps speakers, authors, coaches and entrepreneurs fund their business projects and dreams through collaboration, partnerships, and sponsorship. Their book, “Raise a Dream: How collaboration, partnership, and sponsorship will accelerate your vision from big idea to global brand” will be available this summer. eydisauthenticliving.com 37
WHY BOUNDARIES ARE NECESSARY, HEALTHY AND LOVING by Lisa Marie Platske
I
n January for the past 9 years, I have hosted Design Your Destiny Live.
On day two, I spend over an hour talking about how to live your priorities which is the 4th pillar.
This three-day transformational leadership event covers Upside Thinking’s signature 7 Pillars of Leadership system.
The element within this pillar that comes up for my clients and just about every business person I know is how to set
38 | Eydis Magazine
boundaries in your personal and professional life. A boundary is defined as “a line that marks the limits of an area” so boundaries are simply the lines that you draw that regulate what you want in your life.
Because I have a commitment to myself to provide the best possible coaching support for my clients, it’s always tricky for me when I’m out of the office for long periods of time. While I believe in setting boundaries so that I take care of myself and those I love, I know that when I don’t honor my commitments to myself, I feel anxious and stressed out. My executive assistant, Sheri, and I have had long conversations about this because she serves as a lifeline between me and my clients. When I am heading out for a vacation, she prefers that I plan to do very little work and trust her to manage Upside Thinking, Inc. when I’m gone. Today, that is my ideal, too. However, years ago, I didn’t know how to do this so I would wake up extra early and jump on my computer for hours each morning I was out of the country or taking time off. Imagine me sitting in a hotel in breathtaking Buenos Aires, Argentina and trying to juggle being present to my husband and my clients all at the same time!
Jim and I traveled to Rome in November where we enjoyed exceptional food and drink.
the world’s most awe-inspiring artwork and architecture that literally took my breath away.
Every outing was a one-of-akind dining experience.
I physically gasped when I entered countless churches as I was spellbound by the artistry that surrounded me.
We also set our eyes on some of
After the third day of trying to be all things to all people, I was feeling sorry for myself and realized that I was violating every tenet I shared in my business. I was feeling anger bubble up when my husband would ask me to go to breakfast - and I had one more email to get out. ‘Doesn’t he know that I don’t just have a job -- I run a eydisauthenticliving.com 39
They enable us to stay connected to our big mission and vision for our life. So, get out your sharpies, crayons, or colored pencils and create healthy boundaries for yourself. And, know that by doing this, you will not only live your priorities but give others permission to do the same. I invite you to identify where you want to set a boundary in your life - and then start building the perimeter.
business?!?’ (Ouch. You can see where that conversation can go. Nowhere good - and fast.) I was also feeling the anger bubble up when I was typing emails to my clients. ‘Don’t they know that I deserve to have time off, too?!? Don’t they know that I can’t be at their beck and call?!?’ (Ouch. Who would WANT to work with me with this attitude?!? Yep. Leadership expert extraordinaire at her best.) Oh, the pressure I put on myself to “get it right” and be the “perfect” coach -- and at the expense of my own self-care and relationship. Meanwhile, on Planet Earth, everyone seemed to be going about their merry way. While on Planet Lisa Marie, my inability to set boundaries had managed to create a tsunami of havoc internally - and left the person I cared about most feeling unimportant. So, what’s the solution?
40 | Eydis Magazine
What I have discovered works best for me is to go back to the basics - know what I want and be willing to ask for it. When I do that I’m coming from a place of inner knowing versus reacting to an external circumstance or situation. When you take the time to identify what you want from the simplest interactions throughout the day - and you let others know, you experience ease and grace. Life moves with intention and purpose without the chaos of borderless edges. At the time, I could have set myself up for success by simply letting my husband and my clients know my boundaries and expectations. And, I could have done it with love. After all, boundaries aren’t used to hurt people. Quite the opposite. If they are created thoughtfully, they are a tool to take care of ourselves.
Remember to construct a door as boundaries aren’t supposed to keep others out; they are simply designed to keep us happy, healthy, and whole. The world needs you and your brilliance so shine on! Lisa Marie Platske left her action-packed life as a Federal law enforcement officer to become the CEO of international leadership company, Upside Thinking, Inc. An award-winning leadership expert and #1 best-selling international author of 4 books, she takes her law enforcement journey which began on the piers of New York and ended post 9/11 and shares what exceptional leaders do differently and how to be positioned as an expert in order to seize big opportunities. As a certified master coach, Lisa Marie coaches women in business around the globe. With experience working with clients in over 20 different industries, her proven 7-step formula has resulted in her clients being seen, heard, and recognized for their work without having to change who they are. The founder of Design Your Destiny LIVE (www.DesignYourDestinyLive), she lives in Alexandria, Virginia with her loving and supportive husband Jim and their two pet foxes.
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MARCH 2017
ROOM FOR
JOY
by Kate Sholonski
I
n this dog eat dog, competitive world we’re living in, some business owners frown on the presence of joy in the workplace. Having fun at work is believed by some to actually infringe on productivity 42 | Eydis Magazine
and that it negatively affects the bottom line. I understand that every business owner, manager, or supervisor would want to see every employee showing up at their
best and giving their all for the company. For some reason, there seems to be a collapse of the concepts of joy and fun engagement with a lack of serious commitment and a strong work ethic, as if they cannot co-exist.
Without a doubt, the teams that held a high value around team spirit and joyful engagement, not only had more enjoyable work environments, they were more efficient and productive in their work.
The truth is JOY is natural. We’re hard-wired for it. Somewhere along the line, we got distracted from what is easy and feels good believing that if we aren’t stressed we’re not productive.
Other positive side effects include greater camaraderie where employees sincerely care about their co-workers and seek to help one another when things get tough, rather than be in constant competition, where sabotage is the norm. Employee turnover and sick days are fewer since the work environment that promotes joyful interactions is a more pleasant place to be. People want to come to work if it’s a pleasant place to be.
Imagine if there was room for JOY in every group, on every team, in every home, and in every business. My bet is that problems would be solved more quickly, people would be more collaborative and communicative plus cooperation would be the norm. That combination would not only be a successful one for making money for any business, it would be paving a positive track for us all to live lives on purpose, with joy, and without regret.
Seeing employees as more than robots that punch clocks, do their jobs and then leave at the end of their shift is the first step to creating an atmosphere that allows for heart to heart connections and therefore healthy relationships. People are emotional beings, they are not machines. Working in an environment where there is room for joy, compassion, fun, understanding and a sincere connection is beyond a doubt, a healthier environment than one without. I personally believe the world would be a better place if there were more joyful souls. I have worked on teams that were fun loving and have worked with those that were serious and cut-throat in their interactions.
The studies of Harvard scientist, Shawn Anchor, support the benefits of a positive workplace noting that workers are 31% more productive when they are happy rather than negative, neutral or stressed.
Kate transitioned from a 28 year nursing career to life coaching and as a personal fulfillment workshop leader in 2001. After many years of coaching people from all walks of life, she and her business partner repeatedly heard requests from their clients to combine joy and fulfillment with leadership principles. It was that concept that led them to create their business, Triumph Leadership Group, where they focus on training teams from all sized businesses to build positive and productive cultures. Kate and her business partner, David Larson have co-authored two books, Wide Awake: Three Minutes a Day to an Inspired Life and Heartfelt Leadership: Creating a Culture of Connection. They believe when relationships don’t work, the business doesn’t work and that workers who share heartfelt connections will help business thrive on every level.
eydisauthenticliving.com 43
Self-Growth
44 | Eydis Magazine
HOW TO HANDLE
Criticism
by Mella Barnes
I
freely admit: I am terrible at handling criticism. I hide it well. I stand there with a fake, zoned-out smile on my face, pretend to understand, then go home and cry and spend the rest of the day hating my existence. 46 | Eydis Magazine
I even go a step further: I criticize myself before I take criticism, imagining what the critiques will be. I think of all the terrible things they’ll say, and let them sink in. I call this “preparing for the inevitable,” but in reality, it’s “terrible
insecurity combined with a wide variety of personality issues.” I’m bringing myself down based on imaginary criticism. Things people haven’t even said, might never say, I say them to myself in order to be prepared if they are ever said. If you’re
deal with clients who don’t like your work or want changes frequently. Even if you don’t work in these fields, you may get criticism from your family or coworkers or that one mean friend that you’re not even sure is a real friend. What I’m about to propose is an idea I think we can benefit from. I will try this, and I hope you will too. You may be familiar with the idea that we must ask ourselves three questions before speaking. The questions are, “Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” I searched for the origin of this quote but got a ton of conflicting information. Many people credit Buddha with it, but it hasn’t been proven as a direct quote. There are many other people, including Socrates and Mary Ann Pietzker, who are said to have started the quote, but no one is sure. Pietzker actually has a poem called “Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?” but it seems as if the internet and Pinterest graphics have combined all of these ideas and quotes and whittled them down to the phrase commonly used today.
wondering what is wrong with me, well, join the club. It’s not like I don’t deal with criticism often. I work in music. I write songs for clients and to try to pitch to major recording artists. Rejection, and criticism,
are part of the game. You would think I’d either quit or learn to live with it, but I haven’t fully done either. If you work in a creative industry, such as music, art, graphic design or similar, you probably deal with a lot of critiques and criticism. You
Basically, the idea is that before you say anything, you should ask yourself if it’s true, kind and necessary before speaking. Obviously, this is unrealistic and it would mean half the people I know would never speak again (which would be great at Thanksgiving, let’s be honest), but I’m going to suggest eydisauthenticliving.com 47
turning this around and using it when accepting criticism. It can be difficult to hear certain feedback, so passing it through these filters will help you absorb the facts without including emotion. Let’s try it out. Is it true? Your boss calls you into his office and tells you you’ve been late every day this week and it’s unacceptable. Your client tells you they hate your latest graphic and could do it better themselves. Your mom tells you you’ve gained weight and looked better before. What parts of these statements are true? If you actually have been late every day, then it is easy to see why your boss would be upset. However, it may be more acceptable if you have a valid reason for being late every day. If your client hates your graphic, that may be true but can they actually do it themselves? Probably not, or they wouldn’t have hired you, right? If your mom is right and you have gained weight, that may be true, but “looking better” is objective. Just because
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something is true to some people, doesn’t mean it will be true for others. Examine each piece of feedback and decide whether it is true only for the person speaking it, or if it is an actual fact that you should take into consideration. Is it kind? It’s tough to be kind when emotions are high. If a client is angry about a project, or a boss is upset about a performance, their kindness may take a backseat to their anger. However, some people are just never kind. They can’t say a positive thing about anyone, and their criticism shouldn’t be considered. If your mom never says anything kind to you, you can safely disregard any criticism she has. It’s important to add here that disagreeing does not always equal unkindness. I have a tendency to think that anyone who disagrees with my ideas is just a terrible person, and I need to let that go. They can disagree and express their views, and as long as they are kind when doing so I can try to accept them. Is it necessary? This is the big one. Does the feedback help the project? Using our three examples, the boss talking about being late is necessary. This lets you know that the
pattern has been noticed, and it’s helping you. It lets you know you’ll want to prepare to be early next week, so you don’t wind up in the boss’s office again. The client who hates your graphic does need to tell you that they aren’t happy, but the words used previously were not necessary. The feedback is also entirely unhelpful and doesn’t give you any ideas to make changes. This client needs to rephrase their dissatisfaction (when they’ve calmed down) and come back with specific requests. Your mom’s comments about your weight are absolutely not necessary at all. You probably know the status of your weight and didn’t need her to point it out, or to express her opinion on what looked better. She may think she’s being helpful, but there is nothing in that statement that would help you. Feel free to completely disregard. I hope using this filter to receive and accept criticism will be of some help to all of us. I really hope to get better at it because criticism is a big part of my life. We all deal with it at some point, but hopefully, this idea will make it a little easier. Mella is a session singer, songwriter and producer living in Nashville, Tennessee. Also an animal lover, she has three dogs, a rabbit, and any number of foster animals in various shapes and sizes. She is the author of Way Less Cowbell, a book on communicating with session musicians. If you would like more information or to hire her onto your project, please visit www.mellamusic.com
Writers Wanted
info@eydisauthenticliving.com eydisauthenticliving.com 49
Connecting You With You
PULLING THE WEEDS
CREATE THE FREEDOM WITHIN YOU by Amanda Butler 50 | Eydis Magazine
hinder you from bringing your garden to fruition. The energetic ‘weeds’ for you to attend to are those that are out of alignment with the seeds you have planted. Your ‘seeds’ are the intentions, goals and dreams you have claimed for your Self.
goals you set to move you forward in achieving your vision and dreams for the different aspects of your life? How are they coming along – are they beginning to peak up and starting to grow into hearty, healthy plants with lots of buds and blooms?
The ‘weeds’ can be outdated belief systems, negative selftalk and thinking, pain from the past and wounded feelings such as anger, rage, guilt, shame, sadness and/or depression. None of which help you to water your garden, nor help you flourish.
Or is your inner garden overrun with ‘weeds’ – incongruent, negative or stuck thoughts, feelings and beliefs which are literally choking the life out of you, your relationships and your goals, dreams and visions? These ‘weeds’ become so entangled that you don’t know where they begin or end.
It is vital to pull out the ‘weeds’ so your garden can come into full bloom and be beautiful and vibrant. And it becomes a Conscious Choice … either stay where you are and hold onto the vibrations of the past and be a ‘victim’ to it, OR resolve and heal the past so you can move on and play in the vibrations of your new beginnings.
A
s you enter into the springtime and planted your ‘seeds’, it is also time to tend to the ‘weeds’ which can get in your way. As in a garden, weeds grow amongst your flowers and plants. They can take over and even choke the life out of the garden you’ve planted. Weed growth can be rampant and can take over, which can
This is a perfect metaphor for tending your ‘inner’ gardens and creating beauty on the inside as well as on the outside of you. It’s imperative to pluck those ‘weeds’ of negative and discordant thoughts, feelings and beliefs which get in the way of bringing forth that which you desire to manifest in your life. What’s the state of your inner garden? Remember those inner ‘seeds’ you planted in March with the arrival of Spring Equinox – the intentions and
Are you living in the land of ‘shoulds’ which are based on the past, limitations and the need for power and control? Or are you Consciously Choosing to live in the vibrations of ‘could’ which are the opportunities and potential at your Highest Level and that of your Soul’s Essence, rather than the wounded personality/egoic Self. Think about it. If your ‘weeds’ are issues such as co-dependency (which do ‘run’ most people on some level), then most likely the co-dependent behaviors are overpowering and strangling your garden. They choke the expression of who you Truly are and what you would really like to say, feel or do. Or are your ‘weeds’ the past stories that you keep bringing forward such as abandonment, or what someone did or didn’t
eydisauthenticliving.com 51
Conscious Choice. Let the past be a reference point, not a way a ‘BE’-ing or a way of cocreating your present and future success in your relationships and life. Here are some co-dependent tendencies to consider if they ‘run’ you. Do you …
Power
©2015 Keenawah & Associates, LLC
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People please?
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Tell people what you think they want to hear?
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Make sure everyone else is happy, regardless of what you want?
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Always try to figure out how someone will react to what you say or do?
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Be on the defense to justify your position or your actions?
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Table what you’re feeling because you’re afraid of how others will respond?
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Withhold because you have a fear of love, vulnerability or intimacy?
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Shut down out of the fear of being hurt again, or not being accepted and loved?
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Have the need for others to like, love, accept and approve of you?
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Gather evidence from the past so you can be ‘right’ about how you feel?
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Have the need for others to understand you, and what you say, feel and do?
Power from The Diamond Co-Creative System™ The Universal Energy Form of Power from The Diamond Co-Creative System™ provides the energetic vibrations to help you activate your Soul Codes of Destiny and Success. This sacred geometry technology can help you access the energies of Power. It opens the doorway for you to tap into the Power within your Self so you feel empowered to create and manifest the life you desire. You become aligned with your Soul’s Essence and the Universe’s Highest Potential that is held for you.
do? Perhaps a difficult time in your life which created pain for you? Or maybe a time you felt you made a “wrong” decision, “failed” at something, or things didn’t work out like you thought they would? It is always a choice to live and create from the past and let it ‘run’ you. Or you can Consciously Choose to learn 52 | Eydis Magazine
from it, heal from it, grow from it and move forward. The past gives you opportunities and gifts to realize the contrast of what you want and don’t want, what you like and don’t like, AND what works for you and what doesn’t. BUT it does not need to be the story you keep retelling, reliving and recreating. Again,
How many times have you stopped your Self from going for what you REALLY wanted? How many times do you let other people’s opinions count more than your own? How many times to you live someone else’s life, rather than your own?
To find out how co-dependency may ‘run’ you, your relationships and your life, go to: http://cocreateyoursuccess. com/success-tools/ assessments/
All of these tendencies are ‘weeds’ in your garden. Not to mention the negative selftalk, judgments, beat-up, regrets, resentments and anger you inflict upon your Self or others due to the shoulda’s, woulda’s, coulda’s and ‘what ifs’.
For my part, I love gardening. Even in the beginning when it seems like there are only weeds. I pull them with a deliberate intention to completely eradicate them from my garden... from my mind, body and spirit. I make sure I pull them from the root so they don’t have the chance to regrow and resurface.
If you live in the past or worry about the future, then you can’t be present in the moment. When you’re not present in the moment, the weeds can grow like wildfire.
Imagine it as though you are digging around and finding the root cause of your pain, your wounds, and your issues. Where’s the core origination point? Where did
it begin to infiltrate deep down within you … into your subconscious, and into your cellular memory? When you approach your inner garden with awareness, discovery and healing, you can let go of AND resolve the past, once and for all. I love observing the results … how the flowers begin to thrive and come into full bloom, dancing in the light of the sun and lifting their little faces to drink it in. I love the feeling of joy and the inspiration it brings to me. It’s also how great I feel, when my inner ‘weeds’ are pulled and gone forever. I feel the freedom to live and thrive again so my inner AND outer garden can grow.
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garden … all of aspects of your life including your health and well-being, your relationships, your finances, your vocation and much, much more! So are you ready to pull your ‘weeds’? Are you ready to build a beautiful, vibrant garden within you so that your life, your relationships, your purpose, your passion, your contribution can grow, prosper and radiate your brilliance out to the world? Your Soul is ready! Connect with Power of the True you so you can create the freedom of your MORE! It’s always your Conscious Choice!
There is room to breathe and allow my Self to expand into my brilliance and beauty … to ‘BE’ my True Self and to create from my True ‘BE’-ingness which is LOVE … Living Only Vibrant Energy. Thus my outer gardens also thrive and my goals, dreams and vision come to fruition very quickly.
protected (supposedly), and force you to stay with what you know. They will be the ones that will argue for limitations and try to have you accept your perceived limitations. They will continuously debate all sides of the coin to keep you confused, from making decisions and from moving onward.
As a reminder, co-dependency or any other issues and the past which limit, block or stop you are based in fear. Your ‘weeds’ will Find Evidence that Appears Real.
OR you can Consciously Choose to utilize FEAR as Focus Energies to Alter Results. When you approach your past, your codependency and your issues in this way, there is an opportunity to learn, heal and grow your inner garden which then affects the manifestations of your outer
They will be your old ‘stories’. They will be the critics, naysayers, doubters within you that will try to keep you 54 | Eydis Magazine
Amanda Butler is the Architect of The Diamond Co-Creative System™ and since 2001 has assisted thousands to heal their present and past life energetics, while activating their Soul Codes of Destiny and Success, so they create an integration and vibrational alignment between their Soul’s Essence and personality/egoic Self. The results … they feel connected with their authentic Self, True purpose, passion, joy and love with the ability to fulfill their Highest Potential and live their MORE! For more about Amanda and The Diamond Co-Creative System ™, go to: http://cocreateyoursuccess. com/28dayjourney/ www.CoCreateYourSuccess.com https://www.facebook.com/ createyourdiamondlife
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info@eydisauthenticliving.com
THE ONLY CONSTANT IS CHANGE WHETHER WE LIKE (OR WANT) IT OR NOT by Liberty Forrest
56 | Eydis Magazine
I
was talking with someone recently. Like so many others, her life is in turmoil. She knows things have to change but she’s having trouble identifying just what she wants. She knows change is coming, whether or not she wants it, whether or not she likes it. In a way, this gives her some measure of peace because she wants out of this nightmare as soon as possible. But without knowing what’s on the other side of it, she’s reluctant to take steps to get there, even though “here” is not a very happy place to be. As I’ve told her, the only constant in life is change. Wherever “there” is, that’s where she’ll be at some point – because time keeps rolling along, whether or not we wish it would just stand still for a while. I asked if she knows what she wants. She said she didn’t know how to verbalize it. All she could tell me was what was she doesn’t want. But of course, focusing on what she doesn’t want makes it all the more likely that that’s exactly what she’ll get. After all, worry is simply a prayer for the negative. She wasn’t able to be specific about just how she wants things to turn out. The only thing she knows for sure is how she wants to feel. So I told her to focus on that. Just connect with that feeling, and tune into it as many times a day as she
wants and in time, the other bits will fall into place. She doesn’t have a lot of control over the external parts of her life right now, but she has loads of control over her inner world. So I gave her some homework that will help her connect with it and begin to make some necessary - and very empowering - changes. She has to stop worrying about all the “what ifs” and “what abouts” for her future, and focus on two things: One, the present moment, and only the present moment, and two, how she wants to feel because that’s the only thing she can control. The future is a huge unknown for all of us.
And when we do that, it’s the spirit inside each of us that drives us forward, encouraging us to find happiness and joy, to do what is right and best for us, whether or not we want to make certain changes. That little spirit will tell you very quickly if you’re doing a good thing or not. And if you are, well done! If you’re not, ask yourself why. Ask yourself if it’s really better to live with unhappiness and discontent than to do what you know to be right, and give yourself the opportunity to have a better life. We’ve always got choices to make. We couldn’t choose things that happened to us when we were young or before we were aware that we had it right. But you know it now.
But somehow, when we have a plan, we forget the fact that the Universe could wipe it out by delivering one swift blow, leaving us just as vulnerable and bewildered as my friend has been of late.
Embrace changes that you know to be in your best interests. You don’t have to like them. But if you know they are right, then you must welcome them into your life, whatever else you might feel about them.
What keeps us from being knocked off balance in our difficulties is the knowledge that we’re okay, no matter what. When we have a firm belief in ourselves, when we trust that we will handle whatever comes our way, and when we know we’re making the best decisions possible for ourselves, it helps to keep us on an even keel when things go awry. There is always more strength and a deeper sense of control than we know we’ve got until we’re pushed to acknowledge it.
And in the meantime, please know that you’re not alone. Liberty Forrest is an award-winning inspirational author and Huffington Post contributor. For five years, she did frequent phone-ins on the BBC as a psychic/medium. With a background in social work and counselling, Liberty’s unique program uses a highly creative multifaceted approach to get people unstuck so that they can move forward in their personal and spiritual evolution. eydisauthenticliving.com 57
58 | Eydis Magazine
Boundaries
ESTABLISHING
#RESIST … FEAR AND DENYING YOURSELF by Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC
A
s I talk to clients and others I realize how many children and adults, but especially females, have trouble saying no. While being compassionate and kind are important, respecting yourself is at least as essential. You must know where your boundaries are, where they need to be and how to honor yourself by communicating these boundaries to others. You have a right and a responsibility to care for yourself, which is why flight attendants instruct you to put on your own mask before assisting your children or those around you. Yet too frequently, you have assisted or done for others until you felt used and exhausted. If you did finally say no or asked for assistance, it’s probable that you also felt guilty doing so. This takes a toll on your physical and emotional health. Most children are not explicitly taught how to assert their needs in a respectful and self-assured manner. Girls, especially, have been taught to be “nice” and to not make waves so it is problematic for most women to learn how to express their own needs in a healthy manner. Males are not immune from this difficulty. In the absence of instruction or modeling, people stifle their voice and find themselves exhausted and resentful until their frustration builds to a deafening roar, and they angrily express themselves.
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VERBAL Breathe into your diaphragm. Soften your throat. Speak your needs respectfully and assertively, without aggression. Speak concisely, calmly and with strength.
THOUGHTS Resist FEAR - False Evidence Appearing Real. Fear tactics are used to repeatedly alarm you and make you think that you are endangered even when you are not. In the world of Fight, Flight or Freeze, your cognitive (thinking) processes are minimized, making it more difficult for you to discern your
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truth and maintain your personal goals of confidence, unity, peace and wellness. In fact, you will find yourself repeating the fear-based thoughts even in the absence of the original stressor, potentially disarming you.
PHYSICAL
Practice mindfulness. Challenge your fear-based thoughts (whether they come from within, or were inserted by others). Use your breath to break the fight/flight/ freeze biophysical process, and reboot your body, your emotions, and your thoughts back to wellness. Minimize overwhelm by identifying one thing to put your efforts toward - donate, volunteer, etc. Remember who you really are to keep your focus on peaceful coexistence and unity.
Some people need a larger physical space than others. It’s important to know what yours is. If needed, start by identifying the boundary of your body. You can outline yourself in the sand or on large paper. Then begin to identify where your comfort boundary is. It may vary with the different people in your life: children, romantic partner, friend, co-worker, boss, etc.
I loved the scene in Dirty Dancing: This is my dance space. This is your dance space. I don’t go into yours; you don’t go into mine. You gotta hold the frame.
Now that you know where your body is and where your
that sometimes the loving response is “No”. You have likely identified a large circle of people that you care about and for, but repeatedly fail to put yourself in that circle. It’s time that you include yourself in this group of important people! You have every right to be there. Don’t feel guilty for giving yourself the same care that you offer to others without hesitation. boundary needs to be, use your physical frame to confidently express your needs: Elongate your posture in a relaxed manner, breathe gently but fully, and keep your eyes forward.
ENERGETIC Ground yourself for strength: Stand or sit with your feet firmly on the ground. Allow that earthy power to rise up through your feet spreading confidence throughout. Depending on your personal needs, identify how much personal space you require and place an imaginary barrier at this location. Some people visualize a bubble, a white or pink light, a force field or a firewall. Use the image that works for you. Place an intention (expectation) that no negative words or moods will permeate this selected barrier. See it as a permeable membrane. You select what gets through – towards you and from you. This way you can still send love and compassion outwardly
while guarding yourself against negative words and feelings. This technique is especially helpful for those who feel others’ emotions intensely (empaths). As you encounter the challenging aspects of life you may leave parts of yourself behind. This can also impact your sense of self and your confidence. Spiritual teacher Caroline Myss calls the process of pulling these pieces back, soul retrieval. One strategy is to imagine these pieces floating like star lights. You need not recognize the situations that they represent; with intention invite them back to join you once again. Then breathe in the fullness that is you.
RELATIONSHIP Caring for another should not mean that you stop caring for yourself. Are you wary of hurting another’s feelings or worry that you will disappoint your partner, friend or co-worker? Remember
As you incorporate these components of boundary development, your selfconfidence will increase and your ability to speak your truth will be enhanced. Take care of your being, your thoughts and your emotions and be the role model for self-care to your friends, family members, and children. Though these techniques are for everyone, if you are in an abusive or dangerous situation please seek professional assistance. Judy Lipson is a licensed, professional counselor and educational strategist in West Bloomfield, MI. She helps clients of all ages who have learning difficulties, work or school related anxiety, ADHD, Asperger’s Syndrome or Autism Spectrum Disorders. Contact Judy at 248.568.8665 and judylipson@spiralwisdom. net, and visit SpiralWisdom.net for more information.
This article is for informational purposes and is not meant to replace medical care. eydisauthenticliving.com 61
The Butterfly Moment What is a “Butterfly Moment?” There is an incredible “HAPPENING” that occurs when a caterpillar becomes a butterfly. The caterpillar is encapsulated by a cocoon of its own making. It is imprisoned in a state of total immobility and darkness. Understandably, it must be a time of pain, panic and despair. However, as a certain life force of “allowing” takes over, this creature instinctively “lets go and lets God” an incredible transformation occurs. It is a transformation and struggle that is totally personal. Scientist tell us that if you help a caterpillar by cutting it out of the cocoon it will die because this struggle pushes life giving energy deep into its growing wings. In other words, “no pain…no gain.” As life energies slowly break loose the caterpillar from the cocoon, an incredible moment occurs. This caterpillar has a realization. It is a moment when it finally understands that all of this pain, panic and despair were for a reason. The caterpillar is not what it thought it was! It is one of the most beautiful insects in the world… that can fly!
Can you think of a more “AHA!” moment like this?
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coaching
John Schalter and Carrie Hall (married) are professional Life Coaches, who specializes in personal growth, relationship and career coaching. Their solution-focused coaching techniques offer a highly-personalized program tailored specifically to you. With compassion and understanding, they work with you to help build on your strengths and attain the personal growth you are committed to achieving.
Specialized Areas: • Personal Growth
• Inner Peace
• Professional Development
• Achieving Balance
• Relationship Coaching
• Health & Weight Issues
• Communication Skills
• Organization & Productivity
• Confidence & Personal Power Get your free e-book now at lifecoachone.com To find out more about Quantum Leap Coaching go to lifecoachone.com or call 586.997.4357 10% of all proceeds are donated to the St Clair Butterfly Foundation where John sits as the Board President To find out more about the St Clair Butterfly Foundation visit stclairbutterflyfoundation.org
Self-Coach
YOURSELF TO BECOME THE BEST YOU CAN BE by Lisa Lapides Sawicki
Y
our inner thoughts, the messages you send to yourself, are the key to a more productive and happy life. Statistics state that one in ten Americans suffers from depression and even more experience chronic anxiety.
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Our society often breeds emotional dependency and far too many people are searching for a “quick fix” to solve their problems and issues as opposed to empowering themselves with increased emotional independence.
The independence needed to cope with life in today’s world comes when a person has the ability to calm themselves after something upsetting happens and then begin to figure out how to problem solve and deal with the situation; or work on accepting it if it is out of their control.
quickly learn the skills and techniques to do this.
You Are the One and Only Director of Your Life As a life coach, I feel the responsibility to teach positive and specific daily self-coaching techniques and skills to each of my clients. As a part of my program, I teach those I work with to use the 16 waking hours of each day to positively, realistically and productively talk to themselves and direct their reactions and actions. Even if a person is already working with a life coach or therapist, most only do so for an hour per week. While that is fine, just imagine the results that can be achieved if you were to become your own coach for the other 111 waking hours of each week! Our 16 waking hours a day consist of managing emotions, thoughts, reactions and actions. No one escapes that fact. But when problems arise, far too many people don’t know how to cope with them, because they have never been taught how to selfcoach and self-talk to themselves.
People who are not equipped to be emotionally independent are constantly seeking outside help when they feel upset or need to problem-solve. This is because they don’t know how to take responsibility and manage their own emotions, calm themselves down, and
look for rational options and possibilities. When one does begin to learn emotional independence and to take personal responsibility, they become their own selfcoach, and the good news is that anyone can easily and
Our society breeds us to feel fearful, shameful, not good enough, guilty, competitive, better than or less than. We are bombarded with these messages thousands of times a day from the media, community, friends and family, co-workers, caregivers and those who may be jealous of us. Throughout our lives, we learn so many things other than how to employ our own self-management, and then we wonder why we are unhappy, feeling flat and joyless. eydisauthenticliving.com 65
Practicing Daily SelfAwareness and Coaching The benefits of learning and practicing self-coaching include: •
Calmness
•
Productiveness
•
Decisiveness
•
Schedule control
•
Confidence
•
Resiliency
•
Awareness of fair, healthy and safe boundaries
•
Awareness of desired and undesired actions and commitments
•
Self-control and acceptance
•
The ability to reach realistic goals
•
Happiness and fulfillment
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Here are some self-coaching skills you can start incorporating immediately: •
•
•
Take notice, without any judgment, what your inner thoughts and inner self-talk reveal about you. Are you mostly positive or negative? Are you a victim, insecure, judgmental, fearful, fair, realistic, jealous, conceited, needy or competitive? As you start noticing what your inner world is telling you and how you are feeling, write down your self-observations. Take a real look at yourself and journal your thoughts, reactions, emotions and ongoing actions and attitudes. This will help you get clarity on your inner thought tendencies. Make a non-negotiable choice, from this day
forward, to love, have compassion for, trust, accept and be supportive of yourself. Remember, finding happiness and fulfillment begins with your positive self-talk and the messages you are giving yourself. Do not allow room for negative feelings. No matter what. No excuses. You owe that to yourself. You must choose to love and accept yourself fully and be powerfully selfsupportive. You must take responsibility for your peace of mind and the fulfillment of your life. Know that your happiness is no one else’s responsibility. It is yours and yours alone! •
Come up with four positive self-talk goals every week. Write down the messages you need to say to yourself and implement them daily.
Here are some self-talk starters: •
When my inner self-talk is negative in any way or someone/something is bothering me, I am going to challenge myself to discover a way to positively reframe it, let go of the negativity, let the situation be, or create a possible desired positive solution or outcome.
•
I choose to support myself and direct myself to accomplish positive actions – large and small – with pleasure and ease.
•
I choose not to take things personally, but to learn and grow from mistakes, hurts, and disappointments. (This one is not easy, but if you start practicing, it will quickly change those wasteful,
•
No one likes me.
•
Everything bad happens to me.
•
People are only being nice to me because they want something, they just want to use me.
Positive Self-Talk negative feelings that bring you down and prevent you from feeling self-acceptance and peace.) •
I can say: “No thank you” gracefully and graciously when I need to (Believe me, this is a HUGE one).
•
I can be self-responsible and self-accountable.
•
I choose to be a person of my word, meaning I do what I declare I am going to do.
•
I choose to be pleasant, compassionate, fair and clearly communicative with everyone.
•
•
In each day I am given, I will create a pleasurable schedule for myself that allows me to feel grounded and fulfilled. This will require that I properly prioritize things and have the patience to accomplish my needs and goals. I choose to conquer my tasks and assignments in a timely, relaxed matter and not leave them to the last minute, which can often create problems, messes, and stress. I choose to create a life worth living.
•
When I feel hurt, angry, sad, scared or disappointed, I will always allow myself some time for grief, and then to be healthily and emotionally resilient.
•
I see the beauty in my body and am so grateful for all that it does for me.
•
I accept myself and others.
•
I really like myself and enjoy my own company. All people are equals, no one is better than anyone else. We all shine in our own way.
•
I choose to do something every day or week that is good for me.
•
•
I choose to acknowledge or reward myself every day for the positive and productive things I have accomplished.
•
I choose to feel grateful every day for all of my loved ones and my blessings.
If you begin to practice all of these concepts, these selfcoaching and self-talk skills, you will instantly manifest a more positive inner and outer peace. You will take control of your emotions and actions. You will become a more positive person, and your outcomes will prove to be greatly improved.
Why Self-Talk Is So Vital Through my coaching practice, I have come to realize that everyone, including myself, is actually self-coaching our lives during every one of our waking hours. That coaching can be positive or negative. Learning how to properly, skillfully and positively self-coach is essential to achieving a higher quality of life. The way we feel and conduct ourselves every day begins with our self-talk. Here are some examples of this:
Negative Self-Talk •
I hate my body.
•
I’m too old.
The Bottome Line: Start Your Self-Coaching Regimen Right Now! Lisa is dedicated and trustworthy licensed professional clinical counselor/ Since 1986, she has successfully coached thousands of individuals and groups in the San Diego and Michigan areas. Lisa has an intuitive ability to guid her clients through their challenges and toward their desired goals, while teaching them how to attain emotional health. Her Coaching and Training Workshops are cusom designed for each specific individual, organization and audience. You can conact her at 619.722.5056 or email at lisa@selfcoachnow.com.
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68 | Eydis Magazine
SPRING INTO
ACTION!
A
by Gary Stuart
s the wind and cold of Winter wane, the warmth of the forthcoming spring bites at winters heels. Daylight and sunshine emerge from the long shadows of many a winters night. As the seasonal changes melt away the frigid
temperatures with a life-giving warmth nature seems to manifest right before our eyes. Our “New Year” is now progressing through all the season’s forthcoming changes as Earth hurls into its North American Vernal Equinox heading into the Summer Solstice.
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All of nature Springs into Action as do we. Whether it’s a Tax deadline, School break, June Wedding or Summer vacation plans the time to start is now. Every day there seems as much to do about the immediate future as there is for the daily routines that get us there on schedule. In the current 21st Century age of multitasking to coordinate schedules for all things make it monumental that we can even make it all fit together in a timely manner. Almost everyone from families to even singles juggle numerous tasks to keep everything and everyone interconnected. All the while trying to maintain our sanity doing so. It’s no small irony that “life” itself does the same things effortlessly from digestion to heart beats to thinking and elimination without us even thinking we
have biological needs all the while interfacing with weather and the external environment that exists outside our digitized smartphone world. Life is a miracle of cooperation with a gift that we don’t even have to think about how it works or all fits together. Life just is simply put, ALIVE! There is always an unseen monkey wrench of a health issue, tragedy or death arrives to shake things up making the status quo short-lived. We ALL have the strength somehow to suck it up and move on with grace and ease as we weather the unpredictable bumps in the road. As every mom and dad know that “springing into action” is a necessity and not a luxury. Whether you have a toddler, children or college level teens immense forethought is needed
to roll with the punches and yet be present for everyone’s needs as you go about your busy day. I want to address a different aspect of SPRINGING into ACTION as it is also about our personal self-care. I know, just what you need one more thing to do! Be forewarned the benefits are great and the rewards too as you deserve it and certainly need it as well. YOU must come first! Think of when any airplane flight takes off. “In the event of an emergency”, a facemask with O2 will drop down. “Please put it on YOURSELF First then take care of others after.” All this preparation even in the middle of a potential catastrophe at 35,000 feet. This is really a metaphor for putting you FIRST to Spring into Action for YOU, then the rest can follow the leader. YOU MATTER! Let’s think of ways to put yourself first? Try walking to calm stress and get muchneeded exercise = 2 birds with 1 stone. Try that Yoga class and STRECH and if you’re single what a great way to meet a sensitive tuned in man! Another win, win for YOU! You can reach out to a dear friend or even a new friend to support YOU time together and commiserate and relate the stresses of the week between errands.
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“Positive Action Breeds Positive Response” Anyway, you can do it make some ME TIME! If you have a family, they will love you for it as you too are human and have needs beyond being Super Mom or Superman! If your single, it’s a way of showing yourself self-love and care for your other needs rather than dating or career. Ultimately if we cannot live a life without any gratitude or happiness then what is the point. Sometimes it’s essential to STOP and Smell the Roses. When you choose to SHIFT into a lighter way of being and a renewed sense of joy it creates a positive glow and it may even be contagious to others around you too. Springing into positive action for yourself lowers stress and helps even your body relax while rebalancing itself so you
can serve others in a more productive and efficient way. This will help every situation and bolster your health and calmness too. What a GREAT way to SPRING into ACTION is putting yourself FIRST!
5 Important Things to Remember: 1. You deserve being #1 as YOU are, period! 2. Self-care is essential not a future luxury! 3. You deserve a break in your routine starting NOW! 4. No one can do this for you but YOU! 5. Trust that things will take care of themselves in a new way! The best TIME to Spring into Action is NOW!
Speaker, Author, Constellation Facilitator, Teacher has been documenting his healing experiences over the past several decades. As a young student of Primal Therapy and Shamanism, his insightful writings provide a unique perspective on the correlation between the micro and macro-cosmos, between our inner and outer worlds. His first book on Constellations Many Hearts, One Soul set the stage for his latest book Master Your Universe: How to Direct & Star in Your Own Life on Kindle or paperback at www.Amazon.com He leads healing workshops and trains nationally and internationally and resides in Los Angeles. Distance Family or Organizational Constellations are his healing specialty! He’s coming back to Detroit in August 2017 to WOW again! Give a GIFT that keeps on giving - CHANGE. Constellation Healing GIFT CERTIFICATES plus packages available. His FREE Consultation: www. testyourhappiness.com and online www. ConstellationsWithGaryStuart.com
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Simply Spiritual
THE SPIRIT OF YOUR BUSINESS by Sharon Carne
H
olistic entrepreneurs and practitioners have a powerful role in the future of healing for humanity. These folks have huge hearts, a deep commitment to serving others, 74 | Eydis Magazine
integrity, empathic sensitivity, intuitive gifts perfectly suited to their purpose, spiritual connection and so much more. Yet so many of these amazing people struggle to grow a
business around these wonderful gifts. Now, this issue has many levels – as does healing. To grow your business, you need to consider the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual dimensions
The Mental Dimension
The Mental Dimension is your mindset. Human beings are brilliant creative beings. And thought has enormous power – as you know. Thoughts that are repeated over and over again, along with charged emotional energy, eventually take on a life of their own as a crystalized belief in our unconscious mind. Many of these thoughts and beliefs operate below our conscious awareness. And they are always triggered by strong emotion. Especially fear. One example of this might be one that you heard as a young child when asking your parents to buy something for you. It might have been something like “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” A young child’s mind has no frame of reference to understand this statement. From the child’s point of view, his or her needs are always provided for magically. The result is often an emotional response that can turn into a lifetime pattern of restrictive or negative thought and behavior. The Mental Dimension and Emotional Dimension are intimately connected.
of your business to have a totally holistic approach.
THE PHYSICAL DIMENSION
The Physical Dimension of your
business has to do with the flow of money in and out of your bank account. Included here are also aspects of the physical space where you conduct your business.
THE EMOTIONAL DIMENSION
The Emotional Dimension of your business has two perspectives. One perspective is your own emotional response to your work, your business, the eydisauthenticliving.com 75
Here is how I create my connection with the spiritual presence of my business: Before you go into this meditation, you might want to contemplate what it is you would require from your business, what you would ask your business to do for you. You can include a conversation about cash flow here. Also, contemplate what you will do for your business. Like any friendship, there is a balance or harmony of giving and receiving. This is the relationship you want to create with your business as a person. 1. Go to a quiet space in your home or business where you won’t be disturbed. 2. This is a meditation where you will connect with your business as a person. As you settle into relaxation, create the intention that you want to connect with your business as a person. 3. As you settle into your inner space, imagine you are in your favorite sacred space in nature. 4. In front of you is a path that begins in the distance and ends at your feet. Ask your business to take the form of a person and to walk down the path towards you. 5. A word of encouragement here - Stay open and avoid interference from your conscious mind. Stay out of your own way and allow this to happen. When Sound Wellness first walked down this path towards me, it took a form that was a complete surprise to me. In other words, I never would have created the personification of my business as this person from my ‘conscious’ mind. 6. Engage in a conversation with your business. Remember, you are creating a friendship. 7. If it feels right, move the conversation to what you would like your business to do for you and what you promise to do for your business. Include your conversation about cash flow here. It’s important to really LISTEN to gain the insights you are looking for. They may surprise you. This is an ongoing relationship, and you may find that frequent conversations with your business will be really helpful. This is your friendship with your creation. Enjoy it!! 76 | Eydis Magazine
people you work with and your clients. How do you express your happiness or discontent about your work and the people you work with? The other perspective of the Emotional Dimension is the response of your clients to you and your work. How do your clients express their happiness or discontent with your work?
THE SPIRITUAL DIMENSION: YOUR BUSINESS HAS A SPIRITUAL PRESENCE
In my world, as a deeply empathic spiritual entrepreneur, my business, Sound Wellness, has a PRESENCE in my consciousness that I call the Spirit of my business. This presence shows up like a person. Your business has a presence like this too. And you can communicate with your business as a person like you chat with your best friend.
Sharon Carne is an author, speaker, musician, recording artist, sound healer, Reiki master and consultant. Sharon is the founder of Sound Wellness and the Sound Wellness Institute. Through the Sound Wellness Institute, holistic health practitioners receive the highest level of competency training in using sound and music to support their practice. Sound Wellness programs are at the forefront of education in how sound and music can be easily applied to your everyday life - to reduce stress, help you concentrate, energize you, inspire you and support your health. www.soundwellness.com
Lynn Darmon PSYCHIC MEDIUM REIKI PRACTITIONER Lynn is a Psychic Medium born with clairvoyant, clairaudient and precognitive abilities. She first became aware of this gift at age five. As she grew older her abilities developed, receiving messages from the Other Side, first from family members who’d passed and then messages from loved ones of people around her. Lynn describes this gift of guidance from Spirit as “Second Sight.” During a reading, Lynn will take you on a journey from your past where she will peek into your childhood, to the present and offer you channeled guidance from Spirit as you continue on your Spiritual Path into your future. Serving as a conduit between the Spirit World and this world, Lynn conveys messages from those who have passed with the intention of providing validation, healing and further guidance to their loved ones here. Most recently featured on
Lynn has been featured on ABC’s 20/20, The Huffington Post, AOL, Yahoo News, The Oakland Press, The Detroit Jewish News, Eydis Magazine, MY Magazine, Body, Mind, Spirit Radio, the Lisa Bousson Show, and has been featured in the recently published book, “Everyday Oracles,” by Ann Bolinger-McQuade.
31224 Mulfordton • Ste. D • Farmington Hills • 248.860.1121 www.heavenswhisper.net • lynn@heavenswhisper.net Facebook: Medium Lynn Darmon SERVICES PROVIDED: In person • By phone • E-mail • Skype
• In home
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THE DREAM EXPERTS
What Does Your Dream Mean? by Kathryn and Patrick Andries
Dear Dream Expert,
Dear Perplexed,
I had gotten a haircut but went to another place because I did not think the hair was cut short enough. I watched a lady cut my hair.
You are desiring to change your thoughts. Your first attempt at changing them did not please you, and you felt you needed to make more changes in your thinking in a different way.
I was supposed to meet Susan at Unity Church but stopped at a University. I was walking down a hall and there were people in various places some sitting on sofas and chairs. I decided I should call Susan and took out my cell phone. It gave me several strange visual messages but would not work and then said the battery was dead. I asked someone if I could use their phone. A guy had a strange phone with tiles in it. I couldn’t figure out which tiles to press, tried a couple of times and gave up. I asked a lady to use her phone but she would not let me use it. A guy sitting next to her on the sofa said I could use his. It was a weird phone with a strange lighted display. I was not able to make the call. I was then driving my car to a party. It was dark out and there was deep snow. I looked for a place to park and the car pushed up against a pile of snow which filled the inside of the car up to about the shift lever. Sincerely, Perplexed 78 | Eydis Magazine
You want to connect with a part of yourself (Susan) but you have trouble doing so. You want to focus on your spirituality, but instead, you get intellectual and focus on your mind (University vs. Unity Church). When you get intellectual you have trouble connecting with your inner self. You are aware of tools to get in touch with your inner self but you can’t understand how to use these tools. I suggest doing some meditation work to get in touch with your inner self. You want to have some fun (party), but there is a lack of awareness about this direction (darkness) and it is a direction that is old and stagnant for you (snow). When you want to just have fun with no clear purpose (party) it gets you stuck in old patterns of thinking that inhibit your mobility (car stuck in snow).
Dear Dream Expert,
Dear Confused,
I was in a school building with large windows, looking out at the people below. I was cleaning out my office and found an envelope with letters and money. I remembered that I was supposed to give this to somebody but could not remember who. I put it in a box, then went downstairs on an elevator to a cafeteria in the basement where an event was happening. Someone gave me a piece of cake with pink frosting. There was some chocolate cake that looked good but I passed it by. Someone I knew was eating pink pudding out of a large steel bowl. Then I saw there was a parade going on outside with people dressed in green costumes and hats. I asked what it was and was told it was the same one every year.
You are having greater awareness about how you achieve goals. You recognize that you have some important information about how you set goals and that you need to value certain parts of yourself.
Sincerely, Confused
You are unconscious of how you deal with different types of knowledge and how you process it. At times there is knowledge available for you, but you don’t take it. Other times there is knowledge available, but it is not substantial. I would suggest looking at how you accept or reject knowledge, and what you do with it when it is offered to you. You are celebrating and acknowledging some sort of soul growth that you have achieved. However, the way that you acknowledge your growth is repetitive, and you hide your thoughts about achievement. I would suggest assimilating your life over the past year and acknowledging your achievements. The dream suggests it is time to value yourself.
Kathryn and Patrick Andries are the dream experts. They are the authors of the recently released book from Ozark Mountain Publishing, Naked in Public: Dream Symbols Revealed, and The Dream Doctor. If you would like a dream interpreted, please send it in the body of an e-mail to: intuitiveschool@sbcglobal.net. Learn more about their books at www.ozarkmt.com.
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Write For Eydis Authentic Living Magazine
“The art of writing is the art of discovering what you believe.” 80 | Eydis Magazine
–Gustave Haubert
info@eydisauthenticliving.com eydisauthenticliving.com 81
Talk to Tamara Tamara, the relationship whisperer, is like a walking instruction manual for all of your love, dating. and relationship questions. Ask her your burning questions and she’ll guide you in the direction that is right for you. To ask your questions go to eydisauthenticliving.com’s home page and click on Tamara’s picture, under our “Let’s Talk” section.
by Tamara Green
“Like Michelangelo, see your partner as the masterpiece that they are. The more you love them, the more the masterpiece is revealed.” – Tamara Green, LCSW
Dear Scared-of-Becoming-aDivorce-Statistic,
Dear Tamara My husband and I are drifting apart. I feel confident that there’s no one else in the picture, however, I miss the fun, play and communication we used to have. I want to open a dialogue with him to get to the root of our issues, but I don’t even know where or how to start? Help! Signed, Scared-of-Becoming-aDivorce-Statistic
82 | Eydis Magazine
For the past 25 years, I’ve been advising couples on how to navigate the choppy waters of love and relationships. As a result, I developed a highly effective system that helps struggling partners to re-connect in a respectful, joyful and loving way. I call this process From Awfulto-Awesome 3-Step System for Couples. This method is designed to assist you in getting to the root of what’s really going on in your relationship and to successfully communicate this to one another. Not only will you understand your own perspectives, needs, and wishes but also those of your partner. For powerful results, please follow the three steps outlined below.
The Awful-to-Awesome 3-Step System for Couples
Step 1 - Thoughtfully and Thoroughly Answer the Following Questions: This step is designed to help you unearth your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that you’ve been operating from in this relationship. Each partner should have their own copy of this questionnaire and answer them separately. Please give yourself all the time needed to answer them authentically and honestly. 1.
Three things that you love/ appreciate/admire about your partner.
2.
Three reasons why this relationship is in the condition that it’s in.
3.
Three things/issues you are willing to negotiate and possibly compromise on.
4.
Three things/ behaviors about the other you wish would change.
5.
Three things/ behaviors about yourself you wish would change.
6.
Three things/ behaviors that you are determined to change to improve yourself and/or this relationship.
7.
Three things that you’ve learned about yourself since being in this relationship.
8.
Three things that you are going through at this stage in your life.
9.
Three things that you believe your partner is going through at this stage in their life.
10.
Three things that just don’t work in this relationship any longer.
11.
Three things that would improve this relationship.
12.
The three most significant ways that you show love/ care toward your partner.
13.
Three ways in which you desire to be loved/cared for by your partner.
Step 2 - Sharing Your Answers: This step is designed to help you achieve a healthy way to communicate what you’ve discovered from Step 1. Follow the bullet points below. •
Create a quiet space for the next 20 minutes. Take care of any distractions, such as children (make sure they are settled or in bed), obligations and/ or devices (turn off cell phones, TV’s, radio, etc.).
•
Sit facing one another. If giving eye contact is too uncomfortable for one or both of you, it’s okay to sit side-by-side or backto-back so that there is no eye contact.
•
Choose who will communicate first and who is will listen by flipping a coin.
•
Set the timer for 10-minutes. The person who is to talk first reads question #1 and shares their answers along with any significant details and examples. If your 10 minutes are not up yet, then move onto the next question and answers.
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3TOTIPS GET YOUR LONG-TERM GOALS TO BLOOM What My Orchids Taught Me by Wini Curley, Ph.D.
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s I ate my breakfast and gazed out my kitchen window through the four orchid plants that live there, it hit me! The things I need to pay attention to so that my orchids re-bloom and stay happy and healthy are the same things 84 | Eydis Magazine
that I need to be doing for my long-term goals to ‘blossom’. Stay with me for how these beautiful orchids gave me a fresh perspective. What was in my heart and mind were some long-term business
goals I wanted to re-energize. They were the long-standing ever-present goals like: attract new clients, build my online reach, write more, and establish partnerships. Those goals that were once clear and exciting sounded like static in my head.
It was like listening to a familiar radio station in the background where I recognized the music, but it wasn’t tuned in clearly. Perhaps you can relate even if you don’t have your own business. You might experience that same type of ‘mind static’ or fuzziness for long-term goals like career advancement, losing weight, or finding a mate.
to represent your goals and the outcomes of achieving them. Take a few moments at least once each day to focus your attention there, and connect to how it feels to have those goals accomplished. It will remind you where you are headed when chaos pops up (‘cause you know it will), and help keep you motivated.
Orchids are a long-term goal kind of plant. They often live and flourish for 20 even up to 50 years with consistent care. They put up one or two bloom stalks typically once a year, and the flowers can last 3-6 months! As I was admiring and feeling grateful for the orchids in my window with newly opened vibrant flowers and other plants forming their blossom stalks, I thought “what if my business could bloom every year like this?” Whether or not you have your own business, here are three tips I learned from caring for my orchids that you can use to add resilience to your personal or professional long-term goals.
Shine a light on your goals by making them public so others know what you are up to. When I keep what I want to happen quietly to myself (in the dark), momentum is more likely to falter. It is easier to make excuses for myself and let things slide if no one else knows. My orchids are picky about the quality of light that stimulates their best response. Light that is either too bright or too filtered can stress the plants. To avoid that kind of stress for yourself, be picky and intentional about
whom you share your goals with. Choose people who will support you in some way. You may want assistance that can hold you accountable, help you make connections or access resources that move you forward or reinforce your belief in yourself. If you don’t shine some light on your goals, it will be difficult if not impossible for them to bloom.
TIP 2 – CONSISTENT ATTENTION
My orchids thrive when I provide them with water and food in a consistent pattern. When I am less consistent, they are okay, but they are healthier and stronger when I stick to a routine. I give them a good dowsing and shower in the kitchen sink every 7 to 10 days. I add to that routine some plant food about once a month. However, these beauties love to be misted with a fine water
TIP 1 – LIGHT.
Nothing good happens for an orchid or most any other plant that stays in the dark. Light is vital for good health and growth. If you have been keeping them in the dark, bring your long-term goals into the light. Bring them out of your mind or notebook and make a visual that you see every day. Use pictures or words (or both) eydisauthenticliving.com 85
spray more frequently. It is quick and easy for me to spritz them every other day (or so) with my spray bottle, while the deep watering and additional feeding are not as simple to implement. Don’t make this mistake with your goals. Solutions to maintain momentum do not all have to be complicated and time-consuming. Don’t miss out on the value of implementing a simple system and quick routine attention (misting) that keeps things moving along. You may even be able to delegate some of these activities. Step back from your endless To-Do list, and evaluate what attention pattern you can adopt to move your long-term goals forward with greater systematized ease. Break it 86 | Eydis Magazine
down into categories to reduce the overwhelm of trying to get everything done. For example, if business growth and new clients are goals, your ‘watering and feeding’ activities could be related to improving your marketing material or website, while ‘misting’ could be blog entries or social media posts that share tips or links of value to your ideal client. For weight loss, identifying a food and exercise plan with scheduled activities is foundational and takes focus and effort. Then you can ‘mist’ those goals quickly and easily by using a phone app to track your food intake and exercise. Feed, water, and mist your long term goals routinely so they are healthy and strong enough to bloom.
TIP 3 – POSITIVE ATTITUDE
My attitude about my orchids is that I firmly believe they will re-bloom. I now have proof from years of experience and having it happen. However, the first time I tried it, I just simply had to have faith and believe that I could care for these plants in a way that they would reward me with their beautiful flowers. Check in with yourself to see if there are aspects of your longterm goals where you have lost faith in the goal or lost belief in your ability to accomplish it. When you think about your long-term goals, notice if you feel heavy and burdened, or if there is an energy of excitement and anticipation.
Do your best to reconnect with the vision and enthusiasm you originally felt about the outcome you wanted. If you have trouble reconnecting, it may be helpful to work with a coach on reframing or redesigning your goals. I love my orchids even during the long periods when they are not blooming. If you are not feeling the love for your longterm goals, it may be helpful to set some short-term goals that you can celebrate along the way. It is easier to maintain a positive attitude and stay motivated when you feel you are making progress. There can be several milestone celebrations of interim accomplishment as you move toward any big picture long-term outcome. Don’t miss out on the fun of noting and celebrating your progress. It is rewarding to watch my orchids produce new leaves, form their
blossom stalks, see the buds appear, and then watch the flowers open. Maintain a positive attitude and intention that your longterm goals will bloom for you. If you don’t, it isn’t likely to happen. Most of us first obtain an orchid when it has beautiful blossoms. Similarly, we establish our long-term goals in the midst of excitement and enthusiasm for the beauty of a future vision. When the flowers or enthusiasm fade, don’t abandon your goals yet. There is still an opportunity for the beautiful outcome you envisioned. To get your longterm goals to bloom, create scenarios and systems where you can: shine some Light upon them, provide some Consistent Attention, and maintain a Positive Attitude about your progress and the outcome.
Wini Curley, Ph.D. is a Resilience Expert, Speaker, and Executive Coach. She shows leaders and their organizations how to energize their next win - whether they are on a roll or in a hole. In 2002, Wini became an entrepreneur and left a 20-year corporate career cleaning up environmental hazardous waste sites. Now, she helps clients clean up toxic habits, thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that contaminate their path to success. Clients say Wini’s keen intuition, judgement-free approach, and energy techniques all help free them to release frustrations and blocks and accelerate toward what they really want. Wini has coached successful leaders and entrepreneurs across 3 continents. Clean up the toxicities big or small at the leadership level, and watch the business and its people grow and flourish. Learn more about Wini and her programs at www.WiniCurley.com and www.GiftsFromWini.com
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Enough FEELING WORTHY AND BEING
by Janette Stuart
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ften, we can feel like we don’t deserve the things we desire. We have come to believe that we should take care of everyone and everything else before ourselves. Are you tired of treating yourself like 88 | Eydis Magazine
an afterthought, precious one? The truth is that you are worthy. You are worthy of so much goodness and grace. You are worthy of your heart’s desires. You are enough. You are deserving.
You are a precious gift of the Divine. You are a beloved child of God. You are worthy. You are enough.
How does it happen that we feel unworthy or not enough? It can stem from our wellmeaning caregivers, parents or teachers who teach us not to ask for too much, to let others go before us, to wait our turn until everyone else has been served, to not to get our hopes up. We could have heard that we are not tall enough, smart enough, bright enough… There can be cruel words spoken to us that we assume are true. We can carry those harsh words and feelings with us for years or decades assuming they are truth. They are not the truth. They are words spoken out of anger, out of fear, out of jealousy, out of addiction; they are not spoken of love. Today’s invitation, dear one, is to spend a few moments in quiet contemplation and take those harsh words and look at them objectively, thinking they are only someone’s opinion of you at that moment. They are not truth. Take a deep breath and ask for Divine guidance to open your heart to see your
worthiness and being enough, to release those harsh words or feelings you have carried for far too long, those thoughts that do nothing but hurt you, those thoughts that only hinder you from feeling worthy or enough. Ask that you be filled with a sense of divine love and a feeling of being worthy and enough for indeed you are. God’s love is pure, unconditional love. There is nothing you could have done to change that truth. You are deserving, you are worthy, and you are enough. You are a beloved child of God. That is the truth. God doesn’t make mistakes or misfits. There is also a lot of pressure put on us to obtain an idea of the world’s “perfection”: the perfect look, weight, education, job, vacation, wardrobe, mate, children, portfolio, home, auto…the list goes on and on. Think about who is promoting those ideals. If we felt comfortable in our own worth and “enough-ness,” we wouldn’t be affected by the bombardment from the
fashion, beauty, financial, travel and entertainment industries telling us we are not enough nor worthy enough without their products. The truth is, dear one, that you are a masterpiece; a unique and wonderful creation. Your likes and talents are part of your God-given gifts. Follow the joy in what items in life “light you up” and make you “dance with joy.” Those are the things you should focus on. Those are the things you should say a wholehearted YES to. Those are the things that make you feel worthy. Those are the things that make you feel like you are enough. The beautiful truth is you are enough and you are worthy. If you’d like to experience more of my writings, I am happy to report my second book “On a Path of Joy” Volume Two, was released in February. This volume focuses on loving, healing and finding your divine joy. Here’s a handy link http:// bit.ly/2OAPOJbook. Blessings of love, joy, and peace.
I’m Janette Stuart, Founder of Angel Angles which is my labor of love. I have wanted to express my soul’s work in a more visible way and am now devoting more time to Angel Angles since my retirement in 2015. Angel Angles exists to spread more love, joy and peace into the world. I have always loved to write, I write every day. I write longhand in several different journals as well as type electronically. I have always loved handwriting, the sending of cards and notes, the keeping of a journal or diary. My first book, “On a Path of Joy” will be available in September. I am thrilled. My hope is that the book will help the reader develop or enhance their relationship with their Creator. I am a grateful member of and core blogger for The Wellness Universe. The Wellness Universe is an evolutionary community of members who are positively impacting the world in one or more of the 7 areas of wellness. As a lifelong empath, I have experienced people’s feelings deeply. I have a deep compassion for my fellow man and love deeply. I choose to live a joy filled life each day and hope to help others do the same. Joy is my focus word for 2016. I live in the San Francisco Bay Area with my husband of 33 years, Mark, and our rescue boxer dog, Spike. We have a grown son, Max, who is happily serving in the Coast Guard. I am a mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, neighbor as well as an angelic practitioner. Besides writing, I am a lifelong learner, who reads daily, I also enjoy walking in nature, sky watching, cooking, RVing along the California Coast and visiting with friends and family. Some of my most requested recipes are Asian Chicken Salad and Sticky Toffee Pudding.
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Wealth Consciousness
Manifest your destiny
HOW MUCH IS ENOUGH WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR MONEY? by Ellen Rogin, CPA, CFP®
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Middle school class in Senchi Ferry, Ghana
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s a financial advisor, when I’m asked how much is enough, people are typically referring to how much is enough money for retirement. But asking this question in a deeper way may actually get you to your long-term goals more quickly. What is really enough for you? MerriamWebster defines “enough” as: in or to a degree or quantity that satisfies or that is sufficient or necessary for satisfaction: sufficiently. When it comes to money, especially in the United States, we tend to think of feeling comfortable when there is more than enough without ever taking a deep dive into what is really enough for us.
Global Mama’s creating Prosperity Pictures
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Ellen Rogin and Lynne Twist
I spent half a month this year in Ghana, West Africa. This was my fourth trip there to work with The Ghana Scholarship Fund. This small NGO provides high school and university scholarships to brilliant but needy children in the Senchi Ferry and New Akrade communities. On this last trip, I had the total joy to spend time with some of our university scholarship recipients. They were optimistic, grateful, fun, and totally present in our interactions. Although they come from a very impoverished community, and many have had challenging childhoods, they are grateful and appreciative for things that many people in our country take for granted such as books, school supplies, and the ability to go to high school. For a glimpse into how amazing these kids are, here’s an interview I did with one of our scholarship recipients https://www.youtube. com/watch?v=vGwE6R_HLaE While I was there I also worked with Global Mama’s , an organization that supports
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women business owners (mostly seamstresses and women who create batik fabric) in Ghana by providing them training and the opportunity to sell their goods through fair trade. I taught “the Mamas” cash flow planning as well as how to create Prosperity Pictures. They work so diligently to provide food and school fees for their families – often supporting not just their children but their younger siblings and extended family. Their generosity blew me away. I brought the Mama’s calculators to help with their business bookkeeping. As I was teaching them about how to think about the money in their businesses, it hadn’t occurred to me that most of them had never before used a calculator. So much we don’t even realize is a gift here... Each time I return from Ghana, I am reminded about how much we all have. Looking at what you spend through the lens of sufficiency is an exercise that not only frees up money to be spent or saved more consciously, but also frees up your energy to focus on what you most want to create in your life. It’s a false belief that accumulating more brings more happiness. Actually, shedding
or sharing what you have, whether it’s stuff or financial resources, feels expansive. Lynne Twist wrote an amazing book looking at the issues of sufficiency called “The Soul of Money.” Lynne has raised over $100 million to end world hunger and has worked with both the wealthiest people in the world as well as the most impoverished. She is also a founder of the Pachamama Alliance. The mission of this organization is: “To empower indigenous people of the Amazon rainforest to preserve their lands and culture and, using insights gained from that work, to educate and inspire individuals everywhere to bring forth a thriving, just and sustainable world.” I encourage you to learn more about her work as a way to not only view your money through a new lens but to start to learn about the types of contributions you most want to make in the world. Fear of not being okay when it comes to your money is one of the greatest stressors people face. This idea of what it really means to be okay is worth examining. Ellen Rogin, CPA and CFP®, is an Abundance Activist® and author of the New York Times best seller: Picture Your Prosperity: Smart Money Moves to Turn Your Vision into Reality. Learn more about Ellen and her programs at. www.ellenrogin.com
Authors Page Feature Your Book info@eydisauthenticliving.com eydisauthenticliving.com 95 eydisauthenticliving.com
Healthy Living
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LET ME HEAR YOUR BODY TALK by Liz Bull
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ou may be thinking that your body language ( how you are holding/using your body) is merely a reflection of your mood, how you are feeling, how you see yourself in relation to others. Most of us are familiar with the books on body language that describe the gestures, facial expressions, eye movements, touch and the use of space. Traditionally we’ve been more concerned with interpreting other’s language than developing an awareness of our own. Body language has evolved in spite of human awareness and conscious intelligence. Body language helps take care of us, connecting us to kindred folks, and protecting us from threats. Humans have relied on body language instinctively in many ways for many thousands of years. Body language, and reading of non-verbal communications and feelings are in our genetic make-up. Were these factors not in our genes,
we would not be here today. Before there was language, there was body language. Historically, explorers and tribal leaders had to be able to read the body language of potential foes - to know whether to trust or defend or attack. Body language often helps people to communicate and resolve relationship issues when conscious behavior and speech fails. Think about the last time you gave someone a hug...because you sensed that they needed it and there was nothing you could say to “make it all better.” Humans have also learned to read the body language of animals (and vice-versa). Horse-riders and animal trainers excel in reading animal body language, which for many extends to the human variety. Think “Horse Whisperer.” The ability to interpret body language has been used for
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years ... and popularized in Wild West movies... by poker players, who are skilled not only in reading other people’s nonverbal signals and controlling their own signals. “Poker face” is synonymous with “expressionless.” It is this last bit ...controlling their own signals... which has become so darned interesting and useful! Here’s why. Deliberately changing your body language can have a powerful effect on your mood, how you think about yourself, your health, your confidence and the people around you!!! Here’s how it works. When you smile (Aw, c’mon, try it!),
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your brain releases dopamine endorphins and serotonin. This sets off a chemical reaction in the body, reducing your heart rate and blood pressure, relaxing you and cheering you up. The cool part is that others watching you smile will naturally want to smile as well...and they will tend to think that you are more attractive, reliable and sincere. Smiling is just the tip of the iceberg. Arranging your whole body into a dominant pose for as little as two minutes has been shown to increase levels of testosterone (boosting confidence) and decrease levels of cortisol (the stress hormone). A dominant pose is one that takes up as much space as possible with arms away from the body and legs uncrossed.
Think power marching...or that pose that winners strike, feet firmly planted and fists in the air. Go ahead- try it! DANGER ZONE! There is considerable evidence that continually holding your body in a “weak” position also has a powerful effect on how we think about ourselves, our mood, our ability to learn and remember, our immune function, our stress levels (which affect our body’s ability to digest properly and to maintain a normal weight). Slumping over your computer all day is a “weak” position. So is having your tail tucked under. Referring back to the body language of animals, a dog with its tail tucked under is in the weaker, insecure or even frightened position.
Add to this the science of biomechanics, healthy alignment and how movement affects our bodies in relation to gravity. The research from the last few years shows that the way we move affects us not only mechanically but also causes biochemical changes on a cellular level, changing us from inside out. This process of the body adapting to and being shaped by movement is called mechanotransduction. The bad news is that we are living in the world that encourages sitting with the tail tucked under. YIKES!!! Sitting is not only “the new smoking.” The chairs we sit in all day are optimized for
comfort and convenience, but usually not ergonomically adapted for pelvic floor health...so important for women. Who would even think about that? It’s a triplewhammy.
Liz Bull helps women (and brave men!) who are fed up with weight loss programs that don’t work to finally get a body and a life they love. She is dedicated to busting up the myths, misconceptions and misinformation about obesity.
Being strong and healthy can be accomplished with tiny changes. Hold your palms up; you feel weak and vulnerable. Hold your palms down; you feel strong. Sit up straight; you feel strong. Slump; you feel weak. Tuck your tail under; you feel weak. Push your belly out; you feel strong.
With her innovative signature program she works with her clients to release their limiting beliefs, doubts, and fears, and helps them tap into their natural abilities and their bodies’ wisdom, making weight loss easy and safe.
The good news is that it’s easy to teach your body a new language. Stand up straight. Big smile!
A Medical Intuitive, Master Theta Healer and Certified Virtual Gastric Band Practitioner , Liz has long been fascinated by the important role mind, body, and beliefs play in our lives. Her other studies and certifications include EFT, Psych-K, Matrix Energetics, Access Consciousness, QiGong, NLP and Transcendental Meditation. She has transferred her successful healing/mind-set work with businesswomen to the arena of weight loss because she has experienced first-hand the havoc and misery that obesity creates not only for the sufferer but for their families. www.lizbull.com
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BEAUTY & the Brunch
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by Annabel Cohen
Spring is the time for gatherings. Around the world, there are festivals to welcome beginnings – Some are rooted in religion, some are not. Either way, the days are longer, nature’s first greens are optimistic and folks are together. Two reasons to break a few eggs include Easter and Mother’s Day’s, just ahead. No wonder brunch foods dominate the menus. While there are restaurants that specialize in brunch fare, long lines and lack of intimacy are just a couple of reasons to DIY. The good news is that it’s easy to serve brunch at home. Really simple. In fact, scrambled eggs, fresh bagels and cream cheese and fresh cut fruits can’t be beat for ease and satisfaction. The “breakfast” aspect of brunch includes all the traditional favorites: eggs, bacon, and potatoes. If you’d like to add “lunch” to the brunch experience, include a simple salad or green vegetable. Asparagus is one of the first spring crops and poached quickly and dressed in a tangy vinaigrette, as beautiful to behold as to eat. And finally, foods that go both ways include sweets, like the lovely blueberry coffee cake with a sweet streusel topping, and fresh fruit, ours here with tangy citrus dressing. Two meals in one. Fresh and filling. Perfect for celebrations of all kinds. That is the beauty of the brunch. If you’d like more ideas, read on. eydisauthenticliving.com 103
Three Cheese Potato and Bacon Casserole Makes 12 servings
4 pounds Idaho or russet potatoes, peeled, cut into 1-inch cubes 1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
1 cup shredded Gruyere or other Swiss cheese 1 cup chopped, cooked bacon
1 cup shredded Parmesan cheese 2 cups hot milk
1 tsp. Kosher salt
½ tsp. Fresh ground pepper Preheat the oven to 350˚. Spray a 9x13-inch or equivalent attractive baking dish (since the potatoes will be served in this dish). Set aside. Fill a pot with water and bring to a boil over high heat. Add potatoes and cook until the potatoes are tender about 10 minutes. Drain very well (do not rinse), and spread on a rimmed baking sheet to cool. Transfer potatoes to a large bowl. Add the hot milk and fold well. Add remaining ingredients and stir well. Pour the mixture into the prepared baking dish. Bake for 45-minutes. Without removing casserole, raise heat to 450˚. And bake for another 15 minutes. Keep warm until ready to serve. 104 | Eydis Magazine
Scrambled Eggs with Smoked Salmon with Creamed Spinach Makes 6 servings.
Rich and delicious for a special occasion. 2 packages (10-ounces each), frozen chopped spinach, thawed 2 Tbsp. olive oil, melted 1 cup minced onion
1/2 cup half-and-half
1/8 tsp. ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp. salt, plus more to taste
1/4 tsp. ground black pepper, plus more to taste 3 Tbsp. butter
12 large eggs, lightly beaten
8 ounces very thinly sliced smoked salmon, chopped Fresh grated Parmesan cheese, garnish
1/4 cup fresh chopped parsley or minced chives, garnish Use your hands to squeeze excess water from the spinach (it’s important that the spinach is very dry).
Heat olive oil in a large nonstick skillet. Add onion and cook in butter over medium-high heat, stirring, until softened. Stir in spinach and cook, stirring occasionally, for 3 minutes. Reduce heat to medium and add halfand-half, nutmeg, and salt and pepper and stir well. Adjust salt and pepper to taste. Transfer to a glass or ceramic bowl, cover with plastic wrap and chill up to 2 days/ Heat in microwave (stir in more half-and-half if needed to make the spinach creamy). Or, if serving immediately, spread the mixture on a serving platter and keep warm. Wipe skillet clean with paper towels (no need to wash). Melt butter in the large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add the eggs and scramble until still very wet. Stir in the smoked salmon and cook until the eggs are just set, but not dry (they will continue to cook with their own heat). Arrange eggs over the hot spinach and sprinkle with grated cheese and parsley or chives. Serve immediately.
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Asparagus Vinaigrette Makes 6-8 servings.
2 pounds thin asparagus (Water 1 tsp. salt
2 large hard-boiled eggs (optional) Fresh ground pepper to taste Vinaigrette:
Fill a large saucepan with water and 1 tsp. of salt and bring to a rolling boil. Gently drop the asparagus into the boiling water. Cook asparagus until just tender, 3 to 4 minutes, and, with tongs or a slotted spoon, transfer the hot spears to the bowl with ice water to stop the cooking process. When cool enough to touch, drain asparagus well in a colander and pat dry.
½ tsp. Minced garlic
Place spears on a serving platter.
2 Tbsp. red-wine vinegar
2 Tbsp. fresh lemon juice
Prepare the vinaigrette. Whisk together the vinaigrette ingredients in a small bowl.
1 tsp. Dijon mustard
Finely chop egg (if using).
1/2 tsp. salt
Spoon or drizzle vinaigrette over asparagus and sprinkle with egg. Serve asparagus warm or at room temperature.
1 tsp. sugar
1/4 cup regular or extra-virgin olive oil Trim woody asparagus ends off to the tender part of the stalks (the bottom 3-4 inches). If using thick asparagus spears, shave lower the half of the spears with a vegetable peeler. Fill a large bowl with ice and cold water. Set bowl aside. 106 | Eydis Magazine
Make the vinaigrette: In a bowl whisk together shallot, vinegar, mustard, sugar and salt and pepper to taste. Add oil in a stream, whisking, and whisk until emulsified. Whisk in hazelnuts. Finely chop egg. Spoon vinaigrette over asparagus and sprinkle with egg. Serve asparagus warm or at room temperature.
Blueberry Crumble Cake Makes 20 servings
This coffee cake is easy to make and serve. 3 cups flour
1 Tbsp. baking powder 1 tsp. salt
1/3 cup sugar
2 tsp. cinnamon
1/4 pound (1 stick) margarine, cut into pieces 3 eggs
1 cup skim milk 1 tsp. vanilla
1 quart (4 cups) blueberries Crumb topping: 1/2 cup flour
1 cup oatmeal
2/3 cup brown sugar
1/4 pound (1 stick) butter or margarine cut into pieces Preheat oven to 350ºF. Grease well or spray a 9x13” baking dish with non-stick cooking spray. In a large bowl, combine flour, baking powder, salt, sugar, and cinnamon. Work margarine into the dry ingredients with a mixer or your fingers until well combined. Stir or beat in eggs, milk, vanilla and 2 cups of blueberries. Spread batter in the baking dish and sprinkle the remaining berries over. Make the topping: Place all topping ingredients in the bowl of a food processor and pulse for about 5-seconds. Top the cake with the crumb topping and bake for 1-hour until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. Cool. Cut into squares before serving. eydisauthenticliving.com 107
Fresh Berries with Citrus Dressing Makes 10 servings A perfect first course or side dish. In a pinch, I use frozen blueberries, thawed. For variety, vary the berries. 1 pint fresh strawberries, hulled and halved 1 pint fresh raspberries
1 pint fresh blackberries
1 pint (2 cups) blueberries 1/2 cup fresh orange juice 1/4 cup fresh lime juice 2 tsp. sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
1 Tbsp. finely grated orange zest or peel Toss fruit with juices, sugar, vanilla and zest just before serving. Divide among 10 small bowls or wine glasses and serve.
Annabel is a foodie. She’s a writer. A cooking instructor. An explorer. She’s a aesthete. She knows how to cook. Until fairly recently, Annabel only cooked for people she knows. Her catering, articles, blogs and ANNABEL COHEN COOKS DETROIT Facebook page have earned not just kudos, but awards as well. She was chosen as a Crain’s Detroit Business Magazine “Most Passionate Cooks” and has been profiled in: The Paper, HOUR Detroit, The Detroit News, The Detroit Free Press, The Big Idea, Oakland Press, Royal Oak Tribune, The Detroit Jewish News, Style Magazine, “LIVE in the D,” among others. She won “Best Caterer” in 2015 in The Detroit
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Jewish News, and in 2014 in HOUR Detroit magazine. She was voted “Best Brazilian Food” by Detroit Monthly magazine. Among countless television and radio appearances, Annabel was the deciding judge on the Travel Channel’s “Food Wars” for a Detroit episode pitting rivals Lafayette Coney Island against American Coney Island. Annabel is an author. She co-authored “Eating for Acid Reflux” in 2003 and in 2013 created all the recipes for 2014’s “Fast Diets for Dummies.” As a stylist, Annabel has assisted in countless photo shoots and tested and styled recipes for ads, articles and even a few books she didn’t write. She’s also a cooking instructor and writer/columnist with articles that focus on her favorite things — food, travel and lifestyle.
Live your authentic life
Take the road less traveled
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Believe In Yourself
It’s A Wonderful Journey
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www.mariasavoy.com