March 2007

I

I

What did Jesus know?

FM0307 layout-front.indd 1 I

I

I

I

I

I

ps

1/23/07 4:07:12 PM

f r o m

t h e

e d i t o r

‘‘I

’m all right; I know where he is,” said his mother as we visited after church one day. “He’s home with God today,” his mother assured me. I wanted to share with her my condolences after her son’s death and instead she comforted me with her witness of strong faith. Her son had lived a faith-filled life and was fondly remembered as one of God’s greatest cheerleaders and ambassadors. He could always be found visiting with folks at church with a smile and the words, “God bless you” that would end each conversation. His parents took great solace not only in their son’s faith but in their own. As unimaginably difficult as it must have been for them to return him to God after so brief a life, they were comforted by the hope they found in their faith – our shared faith – that death is not an end, but a beginning.

The season of Lent is not just about ashes, penances and giving things up. It is also about taking new things on – new ways of being, acting, living and loving, as we allow God to transform us.

“I’m all right; I know where she is,” said her husband as we visited in the hospital emergency room. His wife had just died and I had been called to console the family. As we gathered in the tiny room, they acknowledged that although she had not been well for over eight years, they knew that she was now home with God. She was no longer plagued by a mind clouded with dementia. They had seen brief glimpses of her “old” self just a few days before she died. She wrote long letters to friends she had not seen in years. For all too brief a time, they saw once again the strong, faith-filled woman they knew as wife, mother and grandmother. In their hearts, her family knew that she was home with God, filled once again with wit and laughter, sharing the smile that lit up the room whenever she entered. She is home, she is safe, and she is with God. Hope. It’s not just wishful thinking. Instead, it is a kind of vision, grounded in faith, which opens our eyes to new and wondrous possibilities. It is also grounded in the knowledge that God’s words to us are true and trustworthy, that God’s promises to us will be kept. With hope, we can get through just about anything. Hope opens our eyes, ears and hearts in spiritual ways that go beyond the power of our limited human perception to see more deeply than we ever thought possible. Hope gives us the ability to meet both the sad and the joyful in a way that can give us deeper roots and stronger support than we ever thought possible. Hope in God and in God’s goodness can transform us, if we allow it.

I suppose that is why I find this season of Lent to be so necessary, since this season is, by its very nature, all about hope. If we allow ourselves to fully and freely engage this season, then we will also allow God to enter into our lives in powerful ways to re-shape and re-mold that which needs change in each of us. The season of Lent is not just about ashes, penances and giving things up.

It is also about taking new things on – new ways of being, acting, living and loving, as we allow God to transform us.

If we find it possible to believe that God can transform bread and wine into the body and blood of his Son, then we should find it equally possible that God wishes to transform us, not only during the 40 days of Lent, but during the 50 days of Easter – and during each of the days beyond.

That is our hope, and we do not hope in vain. And so our journey in FAITH continues.

“I know where she is” hope’s real comfort

– Fr. Dwight Ezop is editor of FAITH Magazine and pastor of the Catholic Community of St. Jude.

2

FAITH Magazine March 2007Drexel, | www.FAITHmag.com Liturgical Calendar: St. Katharine Virgin March 3 | Sts. Perpetua and Felicity, Martyrs March 7 | St. John of God, Religious March 8 | St. Frances of Rome, Religious March 9 | St.

FM0307 layout-front.indd 2

1/23/07 4:07:18 PM

i n s i d e

t h i s

i s s u e

inside

what you’ll get out of this issue in the know with Fr. Joe 6 Dear Fr. Joe: What are the rules about eating before Communion?

What is the appropriate dress for Mass?

– Fr. Joseph Krupp

work life 9 Working for the fulfillment of others – how do we maintain the spirit of service?

– Tim Ryan

your marriage matters 10 He says: “I don’t want to support her deadbeat relatives.” She says: “My brother lost his job – we have to help.” What do they do?

– Tom and JoAnn Fogle

the parenting journey 11 Parenting our parents – how to relate to a different generation. p r o f i l e Greg Meyer won the Boston Marathon – his training for races mirrors his training for life Greg Meyer is the last American male to win the Boston Marathon.

Read his story, and find out how faith impacts his life. You may even get a running tip or two!

22 c u l t u r e

A hearty soup to honor a strong man Michele draws on her husband’s Italian heritage to celebrate the Feast of San Giuseppe on March 19. Her mother-in-law’s delicious soup is a meatless Lenten treat – and a wonderful Friday night meal.

– Michele DiFranco

26

– Bob Horning

i n t e r v i e w FAITH talks with Katherine Paterson, author of Bridge to Terabithia Katherine Paterson, author of the Newbery Awardwinning Bridge to Terabithia, talks with FAITH about the new Disney movie based on her book. Rooted in a real childhood tragedy, Bridge to Terabithia is a story of loss and redemption for all ages.

29

– Elizabeth Solsburg

– Dr. Cathleen McGreal

theology 101 12 What did Jesus know? Did he know he would die? A conversation in Christology with seminary professors. – Elizabeth Solsburg

spiritual fitness 24 Penance – hair shirts don’t always itch.What does penance really mean, and why is it important for us?

– Fr. Bill Ashbaugh

the last word 31 Let go and let God – reliance on God vs. self-control.

– Fr. Charles Irvin

9 | St. Patrick, Bishop March 17 | St. Joseph, Husband of the Virgin Mary March 20 | St. Toribio de Mogrovejo, Bishop March 23 | The Annunciation of the Lord (transferred) March 26

FM0307 layout-front.indd 3

1/23/07 4:07:30 PM

C a t h o l i c

S c h o o l

n e w s

The Magazine of the Catholic Diocese of Lansing

Most Reverend Carl F. Mengeling PUBLISHER

Rev. Charles Irvin FOUNDING EDITOR

March 2007 • Volume 8: Issue 2

Rev. Dwight Ezop

What’s happening in our Catholic Schools?

EDITOR IN CHIEF

Patrick M. O’Brien MANAGING EDITOR/CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Elizabeth Martin Solsburg ASSISTANT EDITOR

Patrick Dally

St. Mary’s tops undefeated season with tournament win

ART DIRECTOR/WEB DESIGNER

Jillane Job SUBSCRIPTIONS/SECRETARY

Lindsey Walter EDITORIAL INTERN

Rev. William Ashbaugh Michelle Sessions DiFranco Elizabeth Grodi Marybeth Hicks Shanon Hoffman Rev. Joseph Krupp Tom and JoAnne Fogle Bob Horning Cathleen McGreal Rick and Diane Peiffer Tim Ryan Jan Rynearson Theresa McWilliams-Wessels CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Derek Melot Margaret Perrone PROOFREADING

Tom Gennara James Luning (cover) Phillip Shippert

Pinckney’s St. Mary Wildcats varsity basketball team capped an undefeated in-league regular season (11-0) with a tournament victory over St. Joseph of Howell.

“The girls really gave their all this season,” said Coach Peggy Kettner, “I’m so proud of them.”

Flint school honors deceased teacher Karen Wolbert, who died in August from cancer, was honored Nov. 5 at the first annual Karen Wolbert Memorial Walk in Flint’s Mott Park. Prior to the walk, 10 red balloons were released to symbolize her 10 years as a teacher at St. John Vianney School in Flint; five white balloons were released that represented her five-year battle with cancer. More than 200 walkers participated in the event.

First annual conflict mediation conference focuses on peaceful solutions St. Michael Parish’s Mrs. Selby led the fifth grade students in a one-day conference where students learned about meditation skills and practiced various situations through role playing. Nancy Schertzing facilitated a peace circle in the classroom and talked with the class about the program of Restorative Justice which she runs in the Lansing School District. The students were able to see how solving conflicts is critical to keeping the peace at all ages.

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS

Vicki Bedard Wayne Case Michael Eichhorn Mary Jo Gillilland Diane Nowak Margaret Perrone Rev. Bernard Reilly James Rhadigan Ricardo Rodriguez Dcn. David Rosenberg Rev. James Swiat Peter Wagner Sharon Wimple ADVISORY BOARD

FAITH Publishing Ser vice Rev. Dwight Ezop CHAIRMAN

Patrick M. O’Brien

We want to hear from you!

Tell us what you think. We want to hear your opinions – about articles in the magazine, happenings in our church or anything you want to share.

Send your letters to:

PRESIDENT/CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER

Enomhen Odigie Abby Wieber GRAPHIC DESIGNERS

Patricia Oliver SECRETARY

InnerWorkings PRINT MANAGEMENT FAITHPublishingService.com FAITHTM (USPS 01993) is a publication of FAITH Publishing Service, Catholic Diocese of Lansing, 300 W. Ottawa, Lansing, MI 48933. The Diocese of Lansing edition is published monthly except for February and August.

National and parish editions are published bimonthly. To purchase a subscription for the Diocese of Lansing edition, log onto FAITHmag.com or to purchase a subscription for the national/parish edition, log onto FAITHcatholic.com. If you have a change of address, please contact your parish.

Periodicals postage paid at Lansing, MI or additional offices. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: FAITHTM, 209 Seymour Ave., Lansing, MI 48933. © FAITH Publishing Service. FAITH is a trademark of FAITH Publishing Service.

FM0307 layout-front.indd 4

Editor FAITH Magazine 209 Seymour Ave. Lansing, MI 48933 Or send us an e-mail: esolsburg@ faithpublishingservice.com Please make sure to add a line granting us permission to print your letter or e-mail.

Your thoughts and ideas matter. Please share them with your brothers and sisters in FAITH!

1/23/07 4:07:55 PM

f a i t h m a g . c o m

s a i n t

o f

t h e

m o n t h

A bride at 13 a nun at 52 St. Frances of Rome

A glimpse into my future my time alone with ‘baby’

‘‘G

umball machines or pinball machines?” Amy breaks the easy silence of our twilight car ride by continuing the game we’ve been playing all weekend.

“Gumball machines,” I say.

“My turn. A hike in the woods or a walk on the beach?”

She answers with no hesitation. “A walk on the beach.”

I knew she would say that.

It had been a long, lazy weekend of questions and answers as my youngest daughter and I enjoyed a “Mom and Amy adventure.”

The opportunity to go away together wasn’t planned; it appeared on our calendar by serendipity. I had signed up to help transport our older daughters’ high-school crosscountry team to camp – a four-hour drive north. Only I didn’t drive any team members, just their luggage. This left an empty seat for Amy, and an excuse to take my 8year-old on an overnight excursion, (leaving my husband at home with our son).

I figured the time alone together would give me the chance to bond with my baby;

to learn even more about my youngest child, so often the tag-along on the grown-up activities of her busy siblings.

We didn’t map out our trip. Instead, after delivering a vanload of suitcases and sleeping bags to their rightful owners, we put our fingers to the proverbial wind. “Let’s start looking for a hotel,” I suggest.

The first thing I learn is that Amy prefers luxury accommodations.

“How about that one?” She points up the driveway of an exclusive resort.

“We’re looking for something a bit more affordable,” I say. Note to self: Must work with this child on setting realistic expectations.

Before long – and only after I reassure Amy of its safety and cleanliness – we check into a modest hotel.

– Marybeth Hicks

Read more about Marybeth’s adventure with her daughter, or purchase her new book, The Perfect World Inside My Minivan, on www.FAITHmag.com.

FM0307 layout-front.indd 5

Saint Frances of Rome Birthplace: Rome Feast Day: March 9 Patron of Oblates of Mary Claim to Fame: Born in 1384, to a wealthy, noble family, Frances inherited a quiet manner from her mother and a strong will from her father. She was 11 when she knew what God wanted for her – she was going to be a nun. But her father promised her hand in marriage to Lorenzo Ponziani, a noble, wealthy and respectable man. After much stubborn prayer, Frances yielded to her father’s will at age 13 and married Lorenzo. She thrust herself into the social life that was expected of her, only to collapse from strain. She lay close to death, unable to eat, move or speak.

What made her a saint: Frances and her sister-in-law, Vannozza, became close friends and went to Mass together, visited prisons, served hospitals and set up a secret chapel in an abandoned tower of their palace, where they prayed together.

When disease brought famine to Rome, Frances insisted that no beggar was to be turned away. Her prayers caused the family granary to remain filled with corn, and the wine casks to refill miraculously. These incidents convinced her husband, Lorenzo, and his father that she was truly holy.

Frances lost both her son, Evangelista, and her daughter, Agnes, during a period of civil war. Her husband was broken in mind and body, and Frances nursed him back to health.

With Lorenzo’s support, Frances started a lay order of women attached to the Benedictines, called the Oblates of Mary. They pledged to offer themselves to God and serve the poor. After Lorenzo’s death, Frances moved into the house with the Oblates and was made the superior.

Best Quote: After Frances had collapsed right after her marriage, she had a vision of St. Alexis, who told her God was giving her an important choice: Did she want to recover or not? She whispered, “God’s will is mine.”

How she died: At 52, she lived the life she had dreamed of since the age of 11. She died four years later. Her last words were “The angel has finished his task — he beckons me to follow him.”

Prayer: Saint Frances of Rome, help us to see the difference between what we want to do and what God wants us to do. Help us to discern what comes from our will and what comes from God’s desire. Amen. – Jan Rynearson

1/23/07 4:08:07 PM

i n

t h e

k n o w

w i t h

F r .

J o e

Dear Fr. Joe: What are the rules about eating before Communion?

G

ood question here – I get this one a lot.

First, straight up: the rules.

Before the practice of daily Mass, people were encouraged to fast 24 hours before Mass. Pope Pius XII changed the rules to encourage daily Mass participation. Now, the rules are no food or drink (outside of water) for one hour before Mass.

There are, obviously, some exceptions: the most dramatic being in danger of imminent death, where you are allowed to receive Communion even if you haven’t fasted for an hour – let’s pray that one doesn’t happen.

Second, the sick and/or elderly are not required to fast, particularly if their doctors say they shouldn’t. The church defines the elderly as being older than 65; my mother defines it as much, much older than that.

My sister informed me that her 7 year old son came into the kitchen. He looked shocked as he said, “Mom, there’s a problem!” What is it, honey?” my sister asked.

He looked so sad as he said, “I’m hungry, but there isn’t any spaghetti on the table!”

A brief, but firm discussion took place immediately after.

Dear Fr. Joe: What is the appropriate dress for Mass?

G

reat question!

I think, as a culture, we are losing our way on this one.

Maybe this article will give us pause to think about it.

The Mass is to be a sacred celebration, and there are two words to consider here. The focus of this discussion, I think, needs to be on the word “sacred.”

The word “sacred” is tied to the word “holy.” When we enter this sacred celebration, we want to be sure that our manner of dress is reflective of that.

In my mind, our dress at the liturgy sends three messages: one to ourselves, one to the congregation and one to God. By dressing ourselves up, we are reminding ourselves of the importance of what we are doing. We are, in a sense, sending a message to our bodies and minds that something unique and special is about to happen. We also send a message to our brothers and sisters around us that we see this celebration as more than just another event; when the body of Christ gathers, we take it seriously (but in the most joyful way; how is that for irony?)

We also send a message to God by our dress. I understand that God accepts us as we are, but we must remember that God also challenges us to be even more. God deserves our best, not our leftovers.

Overly suggestive or sloppy clothes are, in my mind, sending a message that we should not want to send.

Now, I know there is a crowd out there – and it FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-front.indd 6

6

Dear Fr. Joe What are the rules about eating before Communion?

is not a small one – who will challenge me on this, and I want to be clear about something: I would rather have you at Mass in jeans and a T-shirt than not at Mass, absolutely. My question is this: Why does it come down to that? What is so abhorrent about dressing up? Most people reading this wouldn’t go to the opera or to the prom dressed in jeans and a T-Shirt, so why can’t we give that same respect to our God? Take a moment to pause and remember that the Mass is God’s gift

to us and our full, active, conscious participation is our gift to God. Our dress is a big part of this, so let’s make sure that the way we dress reflects the honor and dignity that the liturgy requires.

Enjoy another day in God’s presence! – Father Joseph Krupp Send your questions to: “In the Know with Fr. Joe” FAITH Magazine 209 Seymour Ave. Lansing, MI 48933 Or: JoeInBlack@priest.com

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:08:12 PM

t h i s

m o n t h

i n

h i s t o r y

p a r i s h

“And that’s the way it is.”

What year did Walter Cronkite retire?

Walter Cronkite, the “most trusted man in America,” officially retired, signing off the CBS Evening News for the last time and drawing an audience of nearly 1.7 million viewers on March 6, WHAT YEAR?

p o l l

FAITH asks: Why is it important to forgive?

We asked fifth-grade students in Ms. Gilbertson’s and Mrs. James’ classes at Holy Family School why it is important to forgive and how God helps us control our bad behavior.

She once sang that “the only boy who could ever teach her was the son of a preacher man.” Aretha Franklin, a woman who would go on to win 15 Grammy Awards and become one of the biggest stars of international recording, was born on March 25, WHAT YEAR? St. Joseph’s Day, a day on which swallows traditionally migrate back to Mission San Juan Capistrano in California (and have done so with little exception), originated on March 19, WHAT YEAR? This horse set three world, two American, and three track records; and sired Battleship, War Admiral and War Relic. Man O’ War was foaled on March 29, WHAT YEAR?

Christian (age 10) God helps us control our bad behavior by giving us our conscience ... Our conscience makes us feel bad when we do something wrong.

Kennedy (age 10) I definitely think that God helps you forgive. He helps me by listening to all my problems and let’s me think it over. Once I have talked to God I know the right thing to do.

Alex (age 10) I think it is important to forgive people because we should follow Jesus’ example.

I show someone that I have forgiven them by giving them a high five.

Answers: 1981, 1942, 1776, 1917

St. Louis Center’s 19th annual dinnerauction a success Nov. 4 was a banner day for St. Louis Center, as the local community and Michigan Knights of Columbus continued to show strong support for the programs and residents who call St. Louis Center their home.

The event, held at Chelsea Community Hospital for the 19th consecutive year, is one of the most important fundraisers for this residential care center west of Chelsea in Sylvan Twp. The dinner was once again a sell-out. One of the highlights of the evening was a check presentation by State Deputy Thomas M. Wegener of the Michigan Knights of Columbus to Father Joseph Rinaldo. Wegener presented a check for $20,000 from the fraternal organization to complete the funding of air-conditioning units for the children’s residences in the main building of the facility.

FM0307 layout-front.indd 7

New CD by Christ the King parishioners

53%

Members of Christ the King Parish, Ann Arbor, led by assistant music director Jane Terwilliger, have established a publishing company called Songs in His Presence. The company has released three CDs of praise and liturgical music, the most recent of which is Held By Love. More information can be found at www.SongsInHisPresence.com.

A scarf for Sister Dorita The second-grade students in Mrs. Amunden’s class at St. Mary School, Westphalia, have been learning to knit on their lunch hours. In celebration of Catholic Schools Month, they gave a knitted scarf to Sister Dorita Wotiska, OP, the superintendent for the Catholic schools in the Diocese of Lansing. Alyssa Huhn presented the scarf to Sister Dorita at the diocesan offices.

of Americans believe religion is losing influence in American life.

(Gallup 9/20/06)

What do you think?

Log on to FAITHmag.com then click FAITH forums to discuss this and other interesting topics.

1/23/07 4:08:18 PM

w o r l d

n e w s

t o p

1 0

w o r l d

n e w s

what in the world? the top-10 Catholic News events this month

1

Students lecture Leno Portland Oregon’s St. Ignatius School’s second grade made a guest appearance on The Tonight Show after sending Jay Leno letters chastising him for avoiding vegetables for 30 years.

2

France barely Catholic country According to a poll published by Le Monde des Religions only 51percent of French citizens identify as Catholics.

3

Bishops announce top films The USCCB announced their top film picks for 2006 – included are Akeelah & the Bee, Babel, Flags of Our Fathers/Letters From Iwo Jima, Little Miss Sunshine and United 93.

4

Pope ends indult At the direction of Pope Benedict XVI, extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion will no longer be permitted to assist in the purification of the sacred vessels at Masses in the United States.

5

Fewer Austrians leave Catholicism Across the overwhelmingly Catholic country, 36,645 people withdrew from the church last year, a nearly 18 percent drop from the 44,609 in 2005.

6

Utah welcomes new bishop The Rev. John C. Wester will take his seat as the ninth bishop of the Catholic Diocese of Salt Lake City on March 14 to minister to Utah’s 200,000 Catholics.

7

Bishops demand minimum wage increase The U.S. bishops and Catholic Charities USA call for an increase in the federal minimum wage. “The minimum wage needs to be raised for the self-esteem and self-worth it affords,” said Bishop Nicholas DiMarzio of Brooklyn, N.Y.

8

Controversy highlights orphan woes The controversy over Madonna’s adoption of a Malawian child illustrates the need for solutions for the growing number of orphans in the country, said a church official.

9

The Divine Comedy a musical Msgr. Marco Frisina, a Rome monsignor, composed a musical version of The Divine Comedy, featuring symphonic, Gregorian chant and hard-rock music. The original Divine Comedy, written by Dante, has influenced Catholic imagination for centuries.

10

St. Paul’s remains un-

earthed Vatican archeologists unearthed a sarcophagus containing what may be the remains of St Paul that dates back to AD 390. The pope’s permission is being sought to open the marble tomb at St. Paul’s Basilica and study its contents. An attempt was made to use X-rays, but the stone was too thick.

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-front.indd 8

8

Stanislaw Wielgus reads his resignation at the beginning of a Holy Mass at the Warsaw Cathedral.

Pope accepts Warsaw prelate’s resignation

B

enedict XVI accepted the resignation of Warsaw’s Archbishop Stanislaw Wielgus, who acknowledged collaborating with Poland’s Communist secret police.

In a note issued by the Holy See, the apostolic nunciature in Poland communicated that Warsaw’s new archbishop presented the pope his “resignation of the canonical office.”

“The Holy Father has accepted the resignation of Archbishop Stanislaw Wielgus and has appointed His Eminence, Cardinal Jozef Glemp, primate of Poland, apostolic administrator of the Archdiocese of Warsaw until further indication,” added the note issued by Archbishop Jozef Kowalczyk, apostolic nuncio in Poland.

Archbishop Wielgus, 67, acknowledged in a statement that in his youth he collaborated with the secret police, after a statement of Poland’s Historical Commission was published, which confirmed the relationship of the then-young priest with the Security Service of the Ministry of Internal Affairs.

In a statement, Jesuit Father Federico Lombardi, director of the Vatican press office, said:

“Archbishop Wielgus’ conduct in the past years of the Communist regime in Poland has seriously compromised his authority, including before the faithful.

“Therefore, despite his humble and moving request for forgiveness, the resignation to the See of Warsaw and its speedy acceptance on the part of the Holy Father has seemed to be an appropriate solution to address the situation of disorientation that has been created in that nation.”

The Vatican spokesman added: “It is a time of great suffering for a church to which we all owe very much and which we love, which has given us pastors of the greatness of Cardinal Stefan Wyszybnski and, above all, Pope John Paul II. “The universal church must feel spiritually sympathetic to the church in Poland and support her with prayer and encouragement, so that she will soon regain her serenity.” – ZENIT

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:08:22 PM

w o r k

Pope says kids can be missionaries too Children can also be missionaries and “witnesses of God’s tenderness,” Benedict XVI said while celebrating Missionary Childhood Day. The Holy Father explained that this day is observed worldwide on the solemnity of the Epiphany, as it “is the feast of Christian children who live joyfully the gift of faith and pray that the light of Jesus will reach all the children of the world.”

“I thank the children of ‘Holy Childhood,’ present in 110 countries, as they are precious cooperators of the Gospel and apostles of Christian solidarity in favor of the neediest,” he said, addressing the crowd gathered in St. Peter’s Square.

The Bishop of Rome encouraged “educators to cultivate in little ones the missionary spirit, so that impassioned missionaries will arise among them, witnesses of God’s tenderness and proclaimers of his love.” – ZENIT

Focolare helping Sudanese children The Focolare Movement is helping to ensure that displaced children in southern Sudan are getting an education and at least one meal a day.

“Save the Saveable,” a project organized by the Archdiocese of Khartoum, is now being supported by funds from an organization founded

by Focolare members, a communiqué from the movement explained.

The project has already provided schools and classrooms for some 52,000 children living in and around Khartoum, in areas where there is no water, hospitals, schools or electricity.

The communiqué explained that the project is a step toward stopping the violence afflicting the area: “A good education for these youngsters, formed with values and positive testimonies, will allow for a dignified life and avoid their falling into the spiral of violence.” – ZENIT

FM0307 layout-front.indd 9

l i f e

working for the fulfillment of others how do we maintain the spirit of service?

C

arol says: I came to work this morning and there was trash on the floor again from where the custodian emptied my waste basket. He didn’t bother to pick up what was missed. My credenza hasn’t been dusted in weeks. What do the custodians do all night? Does anyone try to do a good job anymore? It’s so frustrating when people don’t care.

Ted says: I worked in construction for many years before I was badly injured. I can’t do construction work anymore, so I had to take this job to maintain some sort of income. I filed a claim with the insurance company and somewhere in the process a clerk made an error on our claim, which is now taking months to straighten out. Does anyone care anymore?

Carol is a claims analyst for a health-care insurance company. Ted is a custodian in Carol’s building.

The expert says: Admit it, we all have criticized other people for doing a poor job. Whether it’s a waiter, the school superintendent, a politician, the local road commission, our boss or a co-worker.

It’s easy to see the flaws in the work of others. We have no problem accusing someone of not taking any pride in his work and just going through the motions. Have you ever considered the impact your work has on others – whether you realize it or not? How well do you serve the needs of others in your work? I challenge anyone to show me a job where some human being isn’t impacted in some way.

One of Martin Luther King Jr.’s more famous quotes reads: “If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or

Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.”

We may not all have what we consider a glamorous or important job, and it may often get tedious and hard. Sometimes the answer is that we’re in the wrong job for the wrong reason and we need to make a change. However, more often than not, it’s simply a matter of doing our jobs better.

What can you do to maintain a spirit of service in your work, and focus on doing it well?

• Ask God every morning to grant you the strength to do what he is calling you to do today.

• When a task gets tedious and you want to take a shortcut, think about the implications; who might be impacted?

• Throughout the day, turn your trials and frustrations into prayer.

“Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might.”

(Ecclesiastes 9:10).

– Tim Ryan

1/23/07 4:08:34 PM

y o u r

r o m ance

Thanks for the memories When it comes to romance, memories can be very powerful. Surprise your spouse by putting a little memory book together. Gather special photographs, movie tickets, love letters, poems, seashells, pinecones, pressed flowers etc.

money

Think retirement You know what they say about that light at the end of the tunnel – it could be the headlamp of an oncoming train!

If you don’t want to be crushed by unexpected poverty at retirement, think about it now – contribute to a 401(k) and talk to an investment counselor.

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-front.indd 10

10

m a r r i a g e

m a t t e r s

S

arah and Rick have been married for 17 years. Sarah’s brother lost his job recently and wants financial help. Sarah and Rick disagree about giving money to her brother.

I don’t want to support her deadbeat relatives

He said She said

Rick says: Sarah’s brother, Tom, lost his job a few months ago. Apparently, his savings have run out and he’s facing foreclosure on his house. Sarah wants us to pick up his mortgage payments for a couple of months or so, until he gets back on his feet. But I don’t think Tom has been trying very hard to get a job – he seems to be waiting for the “perfect opportunity.” I think he needs to find anything that will pay the bills, and not expect us to support him.

My brother lost his job – we have to help Sarah says: Tom is the baby of our family, and it was always my job to take care of him. Rick doesn’t realize how hard it’s been for him – Tom is very gifted and he is often unappreciated by his employers. He’s always been a generous uncle to our kids and now I’d like to repay some of that generosity. It will bite into our savings, but not be a catastrophe, if we pay his mortgage for two or three months.

what do they do?

As generally happens in a relationship between two normal people, this disagreement has little to do with the topic at hand – money – and much more to do with underlying issues. This situation is complicated, delicate and sensitive because it involves an extended family member; the biological bond between a brother and sister was created long before the marital bond. To get closer to the root of the issue, Rick and Sarah would be wise to discover the real issue by asking each other questions such as, “Why should we?” or “Why shouldn’t we?”

They also need to reflect on “How does it make me feel when I am asked to …?”, and “How does this issue impact our core values as a couple, and each of us individually?”

If Rick and Sarah can discuss

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:09:12 PM

p a r e n t i n g

their feelings about assisting Tom financially, it might put them closer to a solution both could accept. For example, one of Rick’s underlying issues appears to be Tom’s lack of initiative in finding work to pay the mortgage. Possibly even deeper is Rick’s apparent dislike for the way Tom has approached what Rick perceives as Tom’s responsibility to be a male household provider – a provider who will do whatever it takes to succeed. Rick appears to take a dim view of Tom waiting for the “perfect opportunity.” If Tom were working full time and still could not make ends meet, it’s possible that Rick would quickly come to Tom’s rescue as “one provider to another.”

On the other hand, Sarah’s approach to Tom is one of caregiver. She has always felt responsibility to look after Tom and rationalizes his problems as being caused by others and not

by Tom himself. Rick and Sarah are facing a situation where fact and logic are wrapped in feelings and emotions. The latter must be dealt with first before fact and logic are allowed to shed light on a workable solution for them as a married couple.

Our initial recommendation is for Rick and Sarah to list the pros and cons of how this situation is affecting their relationship.

Once they can identify how it is affecting their relationship, they can narrow in on the “why.” If they can’t do this without heat and anger, they should write a letter to each other expressing their feelings – making sure they use “I” language and don’t resort to finger-pointing. If they cannot work through this on their own – realizing that the most important thing in their lives is their marriage – they should seek professional help.

– Tom and JoAnn Fogle

FM0307 layout-front.indd 11

j o u r n e y

com m uni ca ti o n

Parenting our parents how to relate to a different generation Saying “thanks” Remember to say “thank you” for all the little things your spouse does for you.

Does he warm up the car in the morning? Does she make your lunch for you every day? Saying thanks makes sure you don’t start taking these loving everyday gestures for granted.

time

It’s about time!

Let children plan for you. Adults who have a difficult time committing to scheduled time together should ask their children (any child will do if you don’t have any close by) to plan a “date night” for you.

We will follow though on their plan even when we don’t follow though on our own plans.

T The walls that held that heap of living now hold a heap of fond memories.

he brick ranch house across the street has a “For Sale” sign in the yard. My mom, on her trips to Michigan, has always thought the house was charming. I picture evenings together sharing dinner and a walk around the block. We’d go for casual lunches and plant flowers. If she faced an unexpected illness, I would be right here. Her grandchildren would pop in and out. It would be similar to my childhood, moved one generation up! The only fly in the ointment is that it is my fantasy!

My mom’s friendship support system is firmly entrenched in another state. In fact, her De La Salle Youth Group, formed after World War II, is still meeting four times a year even though the “youth” are in their 70s and 80s! How do middle-aged adults understand their aging parents?

“It takes a heap of living in a house to make it home.”

These words were written by Edgar A. Guest, one of the poets laureate of Michigan, and describe the feelings of many older individuals. The images we see in the media often depict individuals moving to far-off retirement communities. Actually, it is more common to stay in the vicinity that one has called home; many want to live in the actual house in which they raised their families. The walls that held that heap of living now hold a heap of fond memories.

Adult children worry about physical aspects of the house: narrow stairways or mold growing on cellar walls.

Older parents may feel content in familiar surroundings. Friendships, church and community ties provide social supports that are highly valued.

Increasing dependency needs.

When asked about the positive aspects of growing older, many people say that it is great to have flexibility in terms of time and to be more independent. Becoming physically dependent on others for transportation is a major concern; giving up a driver’s license is a major blow. Also, parents are used to financial support flowing from them to their children, and it can be difficult if fixed incomes mean that the situation reverses. When affection and sentiment characterize the relationship, rather than a sense of filial obligation, families can communicate effectively to determine how to reorganize to meet everyone’s needs. Often, families negotiate a series of decisions over time, taking into account changes in health and economic issues while continuing to provide emotional support.

Jesus calls us to care for our parents with gratitude.

In old age we give them material and moral support as we are able. (CCC #2218) As Scripture tells us, “. . . whoever glorifies his mother is like one who lays up treasure.” (Sir 3:4) – Dr. Cathleen McGreal

1/23/07 4:09:29 PM

t h e o l o g y

1 0 1

Q

FAITH: Did Jesus know he was going to die? Did he know he was the son of God?

Did Jesus know he would die?

what did Jesus

T

his year, FAITH is exploring Christology – the study of Jesus Christ. We asked several eminent seminary professors some questions about Jesus. Their answers are enlightening and thought-provoking.

Meet the professors Father Acklin

Father Muller

Father Stevens

Father Thomas Acklin is a monk of St. Vincent Archabbey in Latrobe, Pa. He is a graduate of Duqesne University, St. Vincent Seminary, The Catholic University of Louvain and Pittsburgh Psychoanalytic Institute.

Father Earl Muller is The Bishop Kevin M. Britt Professor of Theology/Christology at Sacred Heart Seminary in Detroit. He formerly taught at Marquette University in Wisconsin.

Father Gladstone Stevens is on the faculty of St. Mary Seminary in Baltimore.

Father Muller: Yes. Human consciousness is brain-based.

The minute we understand that, then we know Jesus’ consciousness had to develop as his brain developed. Then it’s easier to say he developed the way human children develop. He would learn language and Bible stories like all children. As soon as Jesus was humanly conscious, he was conscious of who he is. We all have that kind of awareness that we cannot always put into words. For example, boys and girls experience themselves as boys and girls from infancy, but they cannot put that into words until they have learned language and had experience of others.

Father Stevens: This is a difficult question. There are various ways we know things in this world. The way I know mathematical formulae is different from the way I know Beethoven’s music is beautiful or that we love. Knowing is more than factual knowledge and always has an element of faith about it. Jesus’ way of knowing was perfectly human – it was a vocational kind of knowledge. But Jesus adhered perfectly to the will and voice of God. According to Ray Brown, there is nothing in Scripture to indicate that Jesus’ self-knowledge was supernatural. Rather, God’s perfect knowledge limited himself out of love for us.

Father Acklin: Yes, Jesus had to know both of those things.

But how did he know them? If he was fully aware of his divinity and knew he was going to die, then was he really able to experience death? Cardinal Kaspar, in his book Jesus the Christ,

theo lo g ian o f the m o nth

Karl Rahner (1904-1984)

Karl Rahner, S.J., was an enormously influential theologian who helped shape much of the thought of the Second Vatican Council.

The heart of Rahner’s theology is that we are all open “from the roots” to the grace of God. Our fulfillment as human beings is found in the experience of God, as God truly is.

Rahner conceived of Jesus’ humanity as God’s self-expression in history. Generations after the “Jesus event”, we experience him through the mediation of the church and the sacraments.

Rahner’s most famous work is Foundations of Christian Faith, published as a series of theological essays near the end of his life.

2007 | www.FAITHmag.com 12 isMarch Who Ray Brown? Father Raymond Brown (1928-1998) was an eminent American biblical scholar who served on th

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-front.indd 12

1/23/07 4:09:48 PM

WHO

IS

CHRIST?

A Y E A R - L O N G C O N V E R S AT I O N W I T H T H E O L O G I A N S

Heresy!

Gnosticism: Jesus entered a human body “I’ve got a secret!” That’s a crude, but succinct, synopsis of the Gnostic heresy.

Gnosticism existed before the time of Christ, but was adapted by some early believers.

The fictional Priory of Sion in The DaVinci Code is an example of a Gnostic group.

The Christian variation of Gnosticism taught that Jesus was sent to us to share secret, special knowledge. As with the Docetists, Gnostics believed that matter was evil and that God could not associate with it. Therefore, he had children who created our world – one of these was Jesus. Gnostics believed that Jesus’ divinity entered his human body at baptism and left him before the crucifixion – so that man and not God died on the cross.

A principal proponent of Gnosticism was Marcion, who was the son of a bishop and may have been a bishop himself.

He was expelled from the church for heresy, but his followers, the Marcionites, continued as a movement until the fifth century. says that Jesus had divine knowledge that was pre-conceptual, but grew in his human experience The way I know over time. mathematical It became formulae is differ- more ent from the way I explicit in know Beethoven’s categories music is beautiof human ful or that we experience love. Knowing is over time. I more than factual think that’s knowledge and a good always has an solution. I element of faith don’t think about it. it’s necessary, as most theologians do, to speculate about his being somehow separated from his divine con-

sciousness or, from the Father, in his crucifixion. Instead, imagine him hanging on the cross fully aware of the infinite love of the Father and at the same time being able to take in and suffer all the sin, death, suffering and agony of all people of all time.

This is that agony of love.

Q

FAITH: Did Jesus really need to die in order to save us?

Father Stevens: The whole purpose of everything is to unite humanity with God. Sin had broken up that harmony – we were supposed to be united with the world, each other, God. The sign of this is death – which enters into the

w h a t d o e s th a t symbol mean?

Crucifix The crucifix is a cross with the corpus, or body of Christ, depicted on it.

It emphasizes Christ’s sacrifice and is a reminder that “we preach Christ crucified.” It became common in the sixth century and a crucifix is a required sanctuary furnishing in a Catholic church.

Bible Quiz I am the first “third son” – who am I? Turn to page 28 for the answer

I am the original “third son” – and I never even met my older brothers. Unfortunately, one of them was murdered by the other – and the murdering brother was sent to wander the wilderness. Given his history with brothers, that was OK with me. My name is Hebrew for “foundation” and people often consider me to be the foundation of the whole world – how cool is that?! I lived a good long life – I was 105 when my son was born and I died when I when I was 912. I have many famous descendants, including Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, David and Joseph (Jesus’ earthly father). You can read more about me in Genesis. Who am I?

world through sin. It’s the sign of our relationship breakage.

Jesus dying removes that separation – he died because we died. That which is not assumed cannot be saved – even death can be redeemed.

Father Acklin: If Adam and Eve had not sinned, the incarnation probably still would have happened. It is an act of incredible intimacy and consummation of his love. It is even more important in view of the fact we did sin, because it repaired the breach that happened between God and us. As St. Anselm says, it’s not simply God’s condescension to us, it is God’s covenant with us.

We participate in the incarnation through Mary’s “yes” to God. Father Muller: Christ’s death is certainly an effective way of showing the depths of God’s love for us. The fundamental reason for his death is human sinfulness. When Christ presented himself to the Jewish leaders, they could not get past their own sinfulness to recognize him – they saw him as blasphemous and respond in the way they handled blasphemers.

Although Jesus could predict this would be their reaction, it was nonetheless important for him to press the crisis and make them take a stand. The point was to press the truth.

– Elizabeth Solsburg

on the pontifical Biblical Commission, advising the pope on scriptural matters.

FM0307 layout-front.indd 13

1/23/07 4:09:54 PM

This story was written as Dale was contemplating the last few months of his life. He died shortly after the story was completed.

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-front.indd 14

14

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:10:00 PM

Dale

McKay

hasn’t completely formed his vision of heaven, though he’s thinking about it a lot now. He sees the popular images of angels peering over clouds, but that doesn’t seem to fit. He’s reading a book about how heaven’s government and technology compare to earthly versions, but he’s pretty sure there’s no real comparison. He’s trying to explore different possibilities, but loneliness pervades every vision. c

o

v

e

r

s

t

o

r y

What Dale learned before he died

By Nancy Schertzing | Photography by Jim Luning

FM0307 layout-front.indd 15

1/23/07 4:10:12 PM

c o v e r

s t o r y

it’s over,” he says, looking back.

“Imagine the shock when the doctor said ‘Your condition can’t be cured, only suppressed. If you check the literature, you will find you have 12 to 18 months to live.’

In the same conversation she said, ‘We might be having this conversation 10 years from now. But for planning purposes, it would be unfair to tell you anything more than 12 to 18 months.’”

think it will be lonely,” Dale explains. “Like when Ellen goes away for the weekend. I’m home all by myself, eating a bowl of cereal for supper and thinking, ‘Only 37 more hours until she comes back.’ I don’t know if I want to sign up for that.”

Dale has loved Ellen since they met at Duck Lake.

She was nearly 16 and he was 18. By summer’s end, they promised they would marry each other six years after finishing college. She went back to school, had boyfriends and fun times. He attended a different university and kept in touch, usually ending his letters with the phrase, “To God through each other, and through each other to God.” It became their motto. In Ellen’s junior year, Dale surprised her by hiding behind a tree outside her workplace. Reunited from then on, they married one week after her graduation.

Forty-three years, five children, seven grandchildren and two successful careers later, Dale and Ellen live at Duck Lake.

They bike together, laugh with each other and savor summer days when their family gathers at the lake. Life’s challenges – law school, five babies in seven years, two cancer surgeries, radiation, children’s divorces, sick grandbabies – they faced together. Ellen retired in 2005 and they booked an Alaskan cruise, looking forward to the good times.

In July of that year, Dale’s doctor told him he had another cancer in his abdomen. Dale didn’t flinch. “Mind you, I had FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-front.indd 16

16

the kidney out, the prostate out, 36 doses of radiation – all with no significant effect. I thought chemo would be the same. You sign up. You lose all your hair. (I had already acquired two baseball caps.) You go for a couple of months and

haken, Dale and Ellen cancelled their trip and began to grasp the enormity of the doctor’s words. “Someone saying ‘You have 18 months to live,’ has significantly changed the dynamic of our marriage,” Dale explains. “It has taken us to discussions we never had before and caused us to draw on the faith we developed over our years of marriage. That faith enables me to look

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:10:15 PM

Someone saying, ‘You have 18 months to live,’ has significantly changed the dynamic of our marriage.

They said, ‘Well, we’ve never heard that before!’” Since then the walloping has only gotten worse.

“It goes without saying that a new chapter in our lives has arrived,” Dale explains.

“Together we are doing things we should be doing anyway.

Now for the first time, there is a new element in ince that visit, Dale’s our decisionmythical hamster making – that (he’s named him of time. We Roadster) has feahave purchased tured prominently a cemetery lot in e-mail updates Dale writes to keep friends and family informed and settled our legal affairs. We and entertained through his went to Hawaii treatments. His renderings of and are on a waiting list for that Roadster and other cancer-reAlaska cruise we cancelled after lated fictional characters leave my diagnosis. readers clamoring for more. He “That which was so important ends each report with updates on yesterday no longer is. Issues of another painful subject – the gin family, reconciliation and peacerummy games he and Ellen play making occupy my thoughts during chemotherapy. much more now than “For the treatments,” Dale writes, That which was so before. I ask, ‘Is that “I just sit in a chair important yester- the legacy I want to for about five hours day no longer is. leave?’ Sometimes I struggle. [while the chemoIssues of family, therapy drugs drip reconciliation and “I have always through my port]. peace-making oc- had a suspicion that All is well until Ellen cupy my thoughts someday I would pulls out the cards much more now die. I’d just never had anyone put some and the gin rummy than before. numbers on it. I am begins. She shows trying to accept this fact, trying me no mercy. She leaves me long to be open with this process so enough to go to noon Mass at it will be easier for my children the cathedral. You’d think there and grandchildren to face. I want would be some part of the Mass them to be comfortable with the that would at least dampen her end of the show.” Dale coughs to urge to wallop me and show me clear the emotion from his voice. just a little consideration. I was Red rims his eyes. ahead one week and went into “I hope when my children and the hall. I announced – for the nurses to hear – that I was ahead. grandchildren think of me they with some measure of comfort, even humor, at what lies ahead.

“I have been blessed with my oncological urologist, who has been a truly caring physician and friend.

During a regular visit, I told him I was discouraged that my cancer cannot be cured, only suppressed.

He kind of leaned back, pondered a moment and suggested I think of the cancer as a hamster in my pocket. ‘If the hamster isn’t biting you,’ he said, ‘just take it with you and ignore it.’ This has been my mental compass for dealing with my cancer. He could not have done more for me than to offer this simple wisdom.”

r e s o u r c e

Care given with the greatest love Mother Teresa House is a home for people with terminal illnesses.

People of any faith, culture or background are gladly welcomed, with priority given to those in greatest need.

For more information or to make a donation, contact Karen Bussey at 517.484.5494.

will laugh. I’m really enjoying my funeral preparation. I’ve written the responsorial psalm and have composed the music for the refrain. (I hope whoever says the Mass will be flexible if I don’t get everything quite right!)

It should be a celebration of change – termination of the old and going on to the new. Like a graduation.” ale McKay hasn’t formed his vision of heaven yet. For now he lives his remaining moments with Roadster, savors time with Ellen and their kids and reflects on a precious life well-lived. Perhaps one day Dale’s vision of heaven will include a tree – a comfortable spot where he can wait until his beloved Ellen graduates and they reunite once more.

“To God through each other and through each other to God.”

To volunteer or get more information, click on www.catholiccharities.org.

FM0307 layout-front.indd 17

1/23/07 4:11:06 PM

c o v e r

s t o r y

a bed with a pillow over my head, needing someone to come pull me out!

But for over a year I prayed for strength, and we prepared. Now it’s amazing! I really do feel strong.

n Aug. 31, Dale McKay died. His beloved wife, Ellen, reflects on Dale’s final days and the comfort she and Dale found in their faith.

I was looking through my journal back to the previous March when Dale had finished radiation and we thought we were home free. We were looking forward to this time of blessing Then the tumors returned. In July, when we got his terminal diagnosis, I wrote “I cannot imagine life without Dale. I can’t fathom what my life will be like, and I just pray that God will give me the strength to be for Dale what he needs.”

It’s been Dale-and-Ellen, Ellen-and-Dale from the time I was 16. I thought after he died I would be under FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-back.indd 18

18

Back in May, when we received the first draft of Dale’s story from FAITH, we were having dinner.

Dale brought the article out, and I was sitting there reading it. Of course, I started to cry.

Our daughter Sue was visiting, and she didn’t want to read it. It took her a long time. But Dale told her, “I need for you to really be on board with all of this.”

We were able to use this article with our kids and close friends to open a whole avenue of discussion that was really good. When I shared it with others I wrote across the top “This is another dimension of Dale, and of our story.” It became a great tool we used in this amazing journey.

Dale was so open about his cancer. His article and his Chemo Reports helped him prepare and gave him ways to get others ‘on board’ – as he put it to Sue. The power of this was really

clear when Dale e-mailed his last Chemo Report at the beginning of August. He followed his usual nutsy stories about his cancer and everything that goes with it. But he knew his time was getting close. He wrote: I’m really feeling great, eating well, getting good sleep and especially enjoy the built in excuse for an afternoon nap. We’ve pretty much finished the funeral planning and so I’m left with getting myself spiritually ready for the journey. Just like an intermission, we are together today, we will have a short intermission apart from one another and then I will be rejoined for the final part of our lives as children of God.” “I’ve been given a thought to ponder as I prepare ... ‘When I first encounter Jesus, what will he say to me?’ Great thought, not only in contemplation of death, but how, today, we will treat our brothers and sisters here on Earth.

The e-mail responses to this one were amazing. People responded in ways you could just tell they were touched really deeply. Many wrote that Dale had taught them so much about dying.

Some of our friends decided to organize a celebration of Dale’s life. When our Sue heard they were celebrating her dad, she decided all his kids had to be there. Everyone came home, and Dale got a leave of absence from the hospital.”

So on Aug. 19 we had about 60 people gathered at our house.

There were roasts and toasts, tears and laughter. Dale was just so fully engaged! He kept saying “How can I be dying when I’m feeling so good?”

It was just an amazing time, though it was his last visit home.

We had planned that Dale would die in our house overlooking the lake, and had everything set for him. But around the time of the party, Dale’s doctor recommended Hospice House because his cancer

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:18:16 PM

When one is as blessed as I am, there are always reasons to smile. Have I loved and have I been loved? I never had to guess. I know.

demanded lots of care. We agonized over this, but in the end I’m so grateful we chose to go to Hospice House! The wonderful, loving people there took care of his needs so I could focus on being Dale’s wife, not his caregiver.

To see his soul emerge was just amazing! When time came to move from the hospital to Hospice House, Dale’s condition was so fragile he had to travel in an ambulance, rather than our van. This was different from our plan, so I went to his room to break the news. He looked up from his bed into my teary eyes and without missing a beat said, “Do you think they’ll turn on the overheads?”

90 percent of what he had been sent here to do. “But what do I do with the 10 percent of the mission I haven’t accomplished?” he asked.

I told him our faith gives us the wonderful gift of reconciliation for just such questions. He met later that day with a priest, and I know he felt better after that.”

By his fourth day, it became clear Dale had begun working on the other side – as the Hospice workers described it. He was still engaging us, but sometimes his words didn’t make sense.

His first two days at Hospice House, Dale delighted in exploring and leading tours through the beautiful place. On his third day, his feet and legs were becoming unreliable, so our son, Jim, found him a wheelchair. Dale took advantage of this opportunity to tour around the block with anyone who would accompany him.

The last two days, Dale was working on the other side. He spoke sparingly, sometimes talking to or about people we didn’t know. I asked him once what he was thinking. He said “I’m looking for Jesus. There are so many poor people! I have to do something about that.” I told him to think of his search as if he was walking down a road in one direction and Jesus was walking toward him.

When they met, it would be a wonderful, joyful occasion.

Once, in a quieter moment, I asked what he was thinking. He said he had accomplished about

On Aug. 31, Dale was mostly unconscious. The kids and I were around him, but he didn’t seem to

see us, and he didn’t speak. Every so often, he lifted his arms up off the bed as if he were reaching out to someone we couldn’t see. That afternoon Dale died peacefully.

It’s been Daleand-Ellen, Ellen-andDale from the time I was 16. I thought after he died I would be under a bed with a pillow over my head, needing someone to come pull me out!

Dale often said his funeral was to be a celebration, and it was amazing. He had written the words and music for the refrain and responsorial psalm, and we had chosen the readings for his funeral. It was so beautiful! It felt like Dale was present because he had done so much of the preparation.

After the funeral, Dale’s body was in the hearse ready to be taken for cremation. Standing outside the church, I had a hard time, knowing this was really it. None of us was sure how to say goodbye.

As we stood there, Dale’s brother leaned over and said, “You know, I think that thing has overheads.”

As we watched the hearse pull away with Dale inside, overheads shining out, we were all smiling through our tears.

When one is as blessed as I am, there are always reasons to smile.

Have I loved and have I been loved?

I never had to guess. I know. Dale was a happy man and we loved each other very much. His amazing journey these past months was so full and so blessed! It has deepened my recognition of the goodness within each of us.

Dale wrote in his final Chemo Report, “We will have a short intermission apart from one another then I will be rejoined for the final part of our lives as children of God.”

The McKay family gathers at Dale and Ellen’s lake cottage to celebrate Dale’s life.

FM0307 layout-back.indd 19

However long their “intermission,” Dale’s and Ellen’s love and openness strengthened them through the end of this journey together. As Dale put it, “Great thought, not only in contemplation of death, but how, today, we will treat our brothers and sisters here on Earth.”

1/23/07 4:18:27 PM

p r o f i l e

A

t one time, Greg Meyer held several American and world records in distance running, and he is the last American male to win the Boston Marathon, in 1983. He talks about parallels among running, Catholicism and life; and even offers some tips for those who would like to run more for fun and exercise. Greg attends St. Joseph Church in Dexter.

Running is a sport of fitness. You have to do the work, and you can’t cram it in three or four weeks before a race. It takes months and years. For seven years before winning the Boston Marathon, I had been running 100 miles a week. Before the race, I raised that to 130 miles.

I loved the training even more than racing. I gained my confidence by working harder than others who I felt were better runners. To be competitive, I had to stay at it every day, even on those days when it was hard to get myself out the door. I might change my routine some on those days, but I still plowed through it.

Training helped me become the runner I wanted to be; Catholicism helps me be the person I think God wants me to be. If I don’t practice my faith, I won’t ever get good at it. I’m not good at it – my friends will tell you that I’m certainly not a poster child for the church, but I am “practicing” to get better. I desire to be a good person, and Catholicism shows me how to do it.

Greg Meyer won the

Growing up in the Catholic community at St. Adalbert Basilica in Grand Rapids helped me feel good about myself, and that helped me to run well. The coaches in all the sports, who were volunteers, taught us fundamentals and sportsmanship, and we prayed before every game. It’s easier to do what you do well when you feel good about yourself. That’s why, later in life, when I had a job selling equipment to companies that really didn’t need it, I eventually had to leave. I got to the point where I didn’t feel right about it or about myself. Now I have a job in which that’s not the case.

(Greg is the regional director for major gifts and planned giving for the University of Michignan).

his training for races mirrors his training for life FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-back.indd 20

20

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

In high school, I ran cross country and the events between a quarter-mile and two miles in track. At the University of Michigan, I was an All-American three times in cross country, once in track, and won Big Ten titles in the steeplechase and the 10,000-meter run.

By Bob Horning | Photography by Tom Gennara

1/23/07 4:18:40 PM

I’m not good at it – my friends will tell you that I’m certainly not a poster child for the church, but I am “practicing” to get better. I desire to be a good person, and Catholicism shows me how to do it.

After college, there was a time when I was the American record holder in the 5, 10, 15, 20, and 25 kilometer runs, and world record holder in the 10 mile and 15K.

running well. A race leading up to Boston, in Washington, D.C., was probably my most satisfying, when I broke the world record in the 10-mile. I felt as if I could do anything I wanted that day. Being the first Michigan native to break the four-minute mile just after college was a real highlight as well.

But my fondest memories and strongest emotions always came from winning team championships, both in high school and at the U of M.

I always felt blessed and extremely happy that God gave me the talent to run, that I could do it well, and was even paid to run for many years. Here I am, the son of blue-collar parents, able to see the world because of my ability, and make wonderful friends who I still stay in touch with. I was home with my family during their On the other hand, early years, which many Training helped my biggest disapme become the dads never get to do, pointment was not and now I have the joy runner I wanted to making the Olympic of being involved with be; Catholicism team in 1984. I was some of the area high- helps me be the ranked No. 1 going in school runners. (One of person I think God to the qualifying race, those involvements is help- wants me to be. was running fine at ing to coach the Dexter 18 miles into the race, High School cross country team, winner thinking, “great I’m on the team,” of the state championship for the past then a mile later I’m limping home four years). with a bad hamstring muscle.

I ended up seventh. I took two Winning the Boston Maramonths off to heal, both mentally thon was nice, but not what I and physically, and only started consider my top achievement. running again at the encourageMaybe because I expected to win, ment of friends from around the and everyone else expected me to. country who helped me see that I had won the Chicago Marathon my running was more than just the previous autumn, and was making an Olympic team.

r e s o u r c e

Tips for running What do I tell people who want to run for exercise, or just plain enjoyment?

Three things: • Set a realistic goal. Don’t assume that more is necessarily better.

• Make it manageable so that it fits into your life. Ask yourself where the half hour or hour to run will come from in your day.

• Find a way to make it fun, whether you run by yourself or with others.

It might sound selfish, but being a Catholic gives me comfort and makes me feel good. It’s where I feel I am supposed to be. Walking into a church is a bit like walking into your parents’ home. You will get nourished no matter what. You may get yelled at sometimes, but never thrown out. I can say that I am more patient and understanding than I was three years ago because of my faith; like running, there is always room to improve.

Do I feel God’s presence when I’m out running alone? Some days. But there are also days at work when I’m driving across the state that I feel his presence. I’ll shut off the radio just to be alone with my thoughts. Another place I feel his presence is at Mass, of course. Mass is not a burden for me because I choose to go. I accept being Catholic as part of my life.

Every day I make the decision to be Catholic. I get out of it what I put into it.

I still run 45 minutes a day – an hour on weekends – and lift weights, to stay in shape. But I don’t run competitively. Unless, as recently, when I was in the DexterAnn Arbor run for fun, one of my former classmates began giving me grief at the starting line, so I had to beat him.

When I run every day at lunch, I enjoy being by myself thinking about good things that are happening – or the challenging things. When life is good, the run seems easier. I enjoy the feeling of moving over the ground, especially on trails in the woods. However, if someone wants to run with me, I prefer that. Being in shape enables me to run and talk at the same time, and go at whatever pace they choose. I’m fortunate to be in the position that if they start saying things I don’t like, I can just run ahead of them and don’t have to listen. (Just kidding).

Visit www.FAITHmag.com for exclusive news, essays and special reports.

FM0307 layout-back.indd 21

1/23/07 4:18:49 PM

p r o f i l e

T

aking the job as pastoral coordinator for youth ministry at St. Patrick Church in Brighton meant a pay cut for Martha Goode – and it sometimes means workings 70 hours per week. But, as she says, “I’ve never been happier in my whole life for having said ‘yes.’” Here are some of Martha’s reflections from years of work with youth.

Everything I have learned, every skill I have gained since receiving my master’s degree in religious studies from Marygrove College years ago, I get to use at St. Pat’s. My whole life has led to this. That’s why I can honestly tell our high school people that this is not only a great job, but that I’ve been called to serve them.

Working with youth requires time, commitment, faithfulness. I learned some of that from my mother, and while helping care for her when she had senile dementia of the Alzheimer’s type from 1999 until she died in 2004. My father had died in 1977. It was work to serve her, but a joy. She loved us seven kids so much, and was always faithful to her family and church. I say to people that I have been touched by God, and God’s hand was my mother.

I am drawn to the teenage group because I have a clear memory of how joyful and painful it can be to figure out the details around who we are, where we are going and why. I was in high school with my two older sisters, who were lovely and well behaved. I wasn’t. I was a cross for my parents to bear. Finding my

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-back.indd 22

22

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

place in the family and the world was very complicated for me. My choices were usually for as much fun as possible, which sometimes created problems for my poor parents. About 15 years into my ministry with young people, I started thinking that God was keeping me in high school until I got it right.

High school people are making the transition into adulthood, and are beginning to make their way

in the world. Their independence is emerging, yet they feel powerless against the challenges in the world outside of themselves.

Lots of them feel like they have less faith now than when they were children. That’s because for the first time they are owning from the inside out the faith they will try to live for the rest of their lives, instead of living from the outside in the faith of their parents. That is a

By Bob Horning | Photography by Tom Gennara

1/23/07 4:19:13 PM

About 15 years into my ministry with young people ,I started thinking that God was keeping me in high school until I got it right.

walked this way, I have walked with many in this way. I can help them find, and trust, their voice.

I can also connect them to many, many parish adults who are willing to help them. I can help them feel welcome in the church so they are inside it, not bored and distant from it. Mainly, I can help them discover that what they really love is being the body of Christ together.

How Martha is God’s gift to teens

heavy burden, but one that is made lighter when shared with a faith community which is struggling together. They are looking for fun, to hang out, laugh and play, but they also want to do things that have meaning, that give hope, that call for sweat and sacrifice. They want to love and value each other, to give and receive. What more is there?

I can touch those needs because I am old, and not only have I

r e s o u r c e

What’s a teen to do?

The Diocese of Lansing Middle School Rally at Lansing Catholic Central High School: March 10. Keynote speaker is Jesse Manibussen.

Contact your parish’s coordinator of youth ministry for more information.

Our diocese and the Archdiocese of Detroit are sponsoring a young adult conference on March 31 at the St. John Center in Plymouth.

Keynote speaker is Bob Rice.

Contact prinker@ dioceseoflansing. org for more information.

as a result. The kids ask themselves why there is so much poverty, of all kinds, in one place and not another.

Then they ask what they can do about it locally, at church, in the school cafeteria, or wherever. They begin to put their faith to work.

For example, 20 of our highschoolers and parish adults will be helping those with special physical or mental needs to walk, play tennis, frisbee or golf, and cheer them on. Others go to the senior assisted-living locations and play cards with the seniors or do manicures. They learn how to interact with people, which is the essence of life.

The only strength there is in this world is love. One Sunday night at youth group, 70 kids were playing human tug of war. Suddenly someone started singing, “We are one body, one body in Christ and we do not stand alone.” They hooked their arms and legs to make Where does the desire them stronger in pulling the other team, and the My whole life has to serve come from? song just began like led to this. That’s When I started working here, I made a coma cheer. How crazy is why I can honthat? We do love and estly tell our high mitment to attend four treasure each other. school people that liturgies each weekend, Who can resist love? this is not only a because it seemed like God is love. At the end great job, but that the best way to be of the evening, the lights I’ve been called to together. It is a blessing.

And it is there that we went down and they all serve them. become the body of prayed a blessing over each other. My guess is that most of Christ. Flowing from the prayer and worship is an experience of comus walked away from that evening munity that the teens want in their feeling pretty hopeful. Can you youth ministry, whether it’s Sunday blame me for loving this work? night youth group, Wednesday night Bible study and faith formaThe center of our youth ministry tion, leadership events with the at St. Pat’s is justice and service middle-school youth, or the other through Young Neighbors in Acactivities I mentioned. They want to tion, along with local cross-trainparticipate in the life and mission of ing service. During the summer, the Catholic Church. And this is the we have at least five week-long vision of church we hope they carry programs working in the inner city, from helping with children’s activity into adulthood. programs to preparing and serving food for the homeless at soup kitch- Being involved every single day ens. The young people, and some of in the lives of the young people, and all the people of God, is the the adults, have their eyes opened definition of meaning. Church is during that time to the way many other people live. They meet people about ultimate things, like sickness, death, joy, baptism, marriage, and who have great faith, hope and love simply becoming who we are credespite their adversity. ated to be. It’s dynamite to be part of that exchange of life, possibility, Once they are involved in action, and hope. These are the things that like any of us, it changes their faith. They never see things the same matter.

Visit the new diocesan Web site at www.dioceseoflansing.org.

FM0307 layout-back.indd 23

1/23/07 4:19:39 PM

s p i r i t u a l

f i t n e s s

L

ast year I was with my family, getting ready to watch Narnia, when a preview of the now infamous movie The DaVinci Code flashed across the screen. In a few brief screens, it managed to portray Catholicism in the worst way. Without getting into its many problems, one scene focused on a monk doing some extreme forms of penance. He tightly wrapped something that looked like a metal net around part of his body to deliberately cause him great pain. You could hear audience members saying, “That’s nuts!” Yep. It sure was. Repentance is a good thing. Self-mutilation is not.

It is true that there are examples throughout church history of people performing extreme forms of penance. In the late Middle Ages it became popular for penitents to beat themselves with whips. They were called flagellants and had a great following during the 13th and 14th centuries. The plague known as the Black Death was spreading throughout Europe, and many were attracted to do extreme things in order to invoke God’s mercy and stop the plague. Even before this, whipping oneself – even to the point of drawing blood – was practiced by some saints. St. Dominic Loricatus is reported to have scourged himself nearly continuously over a six-day period, while repeatedly praying the 150 psalms. Another popular form of penance was to wear a hair shirt, also known as a cilice. The shirt was made of rough material like sackcloth or goat’s hair, and was worn underneath one’s clothing so no one would see it. “And your Father who sees what is hidden will repay you.” (Mt 6:18) The shirt was uncomfortable, but did not harm the body. St Thomas More and many other saints were known to adopt this practice. What are we to make of all this?

First, we remember Jesus’ words to us as he began his public ministry: “Repent, for the Kingdom of God

Penance

hair shirts don’t always itch

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-back.indd 24

24

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

1/23/07 4:19:49 PM

We usually do not have to look far for a penance. Our daily duty, done well, offers plenty of penance for the soul. As one popular priest has noted, your hair shirt might be beside you at home or work. Hair shirts don’t always itch.

is at hand.” (Mt 4:17) Repentance means we turn away from sin and turn to God. It did not imply slashing, cutting, whipping or beating ourselves to cause physical harm. The lack of physical penance of Jesus’ disciples – at least at the beginning of his ministry – was a concern for some of the Jewish religious leaders. Some Pharisees asked, “Why do your disciples not fast?” Jesus responded by asking how can one fast when one is with the bridegroom at a wedding? Also, you don’t put new wine into old wineskins.

“Otherwise the skins will burst and both wine and skins will be ruined.” (Mt 9:17) But he also said, “when the bridegroom is taken away, then they will fast.” (Mt 9:15) There are times when physical penance, also known as mortification, is appropriate.

How great is our desire to follow Jesus Christ? Jesus did penance for 40 days in the desert as a preparation for his ministry.

Penance was an appropriate human expression of his complete reliance and union with his heavenly Father. Penance is directly associated with our desire to imitate Jesus and to serve God alone. We do penance because we love Jesus and hate sin. God graces penance so that it helps weaken our attachment to sin and deepens our conviction and resolve to follow him.

I know of a person who was struggling with an addiction he could not seem to break. He decided to go to confession and to do penance by going to Mass on the first Saturday of the month for five consecutive months. He also prayed the rosary after Mass, asking that God would help heal the addiction. Within a short time, he was freed! You could see the new joy and freedom within him. True penance does not put sadness in our hearts, but joy.

I am sure you will be glad to know the church condemned the

FM0307 layout-back.indd 25

severe scourging of the flagellants. Such severe penances harkened back to the prophet Elijah, who challenged the false prophets of Baal on top of Mt Carmel. The false prophets cut and slashed themselves and danced in a frenzied way in order to win favor so their god might hear them. Elijah taunted them by saying that maybe their god was hard of hearing, or maybe he had stepped out for a while to relieve himself! When Elijah called on the Lord in faith and trust, he did not cut or harm himself, but simply called on the Lord in a humble and obedient way. God responded. (cf 1 Kings 18) What about the hair shirt or cilice? Elijah did wear a “hairy garment.” (2 Kings 1:8) Certainly a hair shirt does no harm to a person physically. It is just uncomfortable. Hair shirts are a part of our tradition, going all the way back to our Jewish roots. King David, when confronted with the sin of adultery and murder, fasted, prayed, and prostrated himself on the ground in sackcloth for seven days. His son, born from his adulterous union, was dying just as the prophet Nathan had foretold. (2 Sam 12:14) David believed his penance might gain pardon and mercy for his child.

David wrote in Psalm 51, “A humbled contrite heart, the Lord does not spurn.”

Following the practice of Jesus and many saints, we know penance is good and necessary for us. We usually do not have to look far for a penance. Our daily duty, done well, offers plenty of penance for the soul. As one popular priest has noted, your hair shirt might be beside you at home or work. Hair shirts don’t al-

ways itch. How tolerant, patient and loving are we to others who rub us the wrong way?

Acts of penance strengthen the will’s resolve to reject sin and live for God alone. Penance is spiritual medicine for the soul. When done well, it causes a blaze of love to burn inside a person. Penance can break down the hard shell that surrounds our hearts and open them up so real love can flow out. It helps us live for others and not ourselves. It helps us live for God.

Spiritual Exercises

T

he church still asks us to do penance every Friday of the year (unless it is a major feast day). In Lent, the church asks us to abstain from eating meat. Outside of Lent, we can substitute that penance for something else. Here are some examples of penances we can do every day!

1. Accept whatever suffering comes your way out of love for God. 2. Do the tasks asked of you, and do them well, out of love of God. 3. Fast from food you like for love of God. 4. Deny yourself some pleasure for love of God. 5. Visit the sick and lonely. I know one man who went into a nursing home to visit someone who had no family during Lent. It ended up changing his life.

6. Drive the speed limit and do not rush in traffic. Do not be angry and impatient, but pray for those who fly by you at high speeds.

7. Give alms – donate money to church, or the many charities in your local community. Seek out ways to anonymously help someone who is down and out.

8. When someone or something rubs you the wrong way – be patient and kind. Thank God for such a wonderful “hair shirt!” – Father Bill Ashbaugh

1/23/07 4:19:52 PM

to Honor a Strong Man FM0307 layout-back.indd 26

1/23/07 4:20:21 PM

c u l t u r e

L

ent is upon us, and I once again have that $64,000 question on my mind: What alternatives are there for dinner on a Friday other than the usual cardboard cheese pizza? I will say that I have been blessed to marry into a nice Italian family which came with bunches of meatless recipes. One in particular that immediately comes to mind is perfect for the month of March. It’s a “kill two birds with one stone” concoction that has you covered for both Lent and another important day that most of us don’t quite think of immediately: The Feast of Saint Joseph. Yes indeed, leave it to those Italians to have come up with a delicious ritual soup (among other recipes) to honor our beloved San Giuseppe on his feast day, March 19.

What alternatives are there for dinner on a Friday other than the usual cardboard cheese pizza?

Italian soup and tradition aside, no one showed greater faithfulness and self-control than St. Joseph, husband of Mary and foster father of Jesus.

This was a man who didn’t give-in to worldly desires and passions. Rather, he fully submitted to the Lord by being a faithful husband to Mary. His feast day just happens to fall during Lent, a time when we all should practice our ultimate Godgiven self-control – which can sometimes be very difficult to do. Thanks to our secular conditioning, we are more proficient in saying “no” to authority and very reluctant in saying “no” to ourselves. What may help out is to look to St. Joseph as a rock-solid example of obedience and spiritual strength.

To honor such a man, enjoy this hearty minestrone-like soup recipe my mother-in-law was so gracious to share. It is her version of an age-old Italian recipe (Maccu di San Giuseppe), which is rooted in a custom of clearing out the pantry of leftover, dried harvest in the expectation of the new harvest to come. She makes it annually for her husband (who is coincidently named Joseph) on the actual feast day. “Saint Joseph’s Day Soup,” as she calls it, can remind us of the patient and self-sacrificing role model we have in Saint Joseph. It also provides a meatless dish that assists us in our Lenten sacrifice.

And thankfully, it tastes a great deal better than cardboard cheese pizza.

Directions:

• 1 package of mixed soup beans (contains a variety) • ½ cup canned chickpeas • 1 package of Ditalini Pasta (Any small pasta shapes will work) • 1 large onion (chopped) • 2 cloves garlic (minced) • 2-3 tablespoons extravirgin olive oil • 2 celery stalks, chopped • 2 carrots, chopped

• ¾ cup diced potatoes • ¾ cup zucchini, chopped (green and/or yellow) • ¾ cup diced tomatoes (canned is fine) • ¾ cup Swiss chard (roughly chopped) • ¼ cup chopped parsley • vegetable soup base or bouillon, to taste • water • salt and pepper, to taste

Soak the dried beans the night before (following the package directions).

On the day of cooking, sauté the chopped onion and garlic in the olive oil in a medium to large stock pot.

Add the rinsed beans and chickpeas, celery, carrots, potatoes and zucchini. Pour in water until it is 6-7 inches above the level of beans and vegetables. Give pot a quick stir and boil on a low to medium heat for about 30 minutes. Reduce heat to a gentle boil and add tomatoes, Swiss chard, parsley and vegetable soup base/bouillon (to taste) and salt and pepper (to taste).

Finally, add approximately one cup of pasta (give or take, if you prefer) and continue to boil until vegetables and pasta are tender. Before serving, top with grated parmesan cheese and croutons for extra flavor.

Note: You can add, subtract or substitute beans and vegetables of your preference. Also, add more water (and adjust vegetable base accordingly), if you prefer soup with more broth or if you plan to eat it the next day (since it tends to thicken).

By Michelle Sessions-DiFranco | Photography by Phillip Shippert

FM0307 layout-back.indd 27

1/23/07 4:20:31 PM

l o c a l

n e w s

Community rallies for Lansing’s Cristo Rey The Lansing Fire Department is offering a $500 reward for information regarding the arson that ruined Cristo Rey Community Center’s medical clinic in early December. Community outreach has included donations from Lansing Fire Department’s Fire Station 8, Ingham County Courthouse as well as anonymous donors and former parish members; the donations total $2,400.

Dinner honors area clergy On Nov. 12, the Fowler Knights of Columbus Msgr. Esper Council #3027 hosted the district Clergy Appreciation Dinner. The evening honored the local clergy, deacons, seminarians and religious vocations from Fowler, Westphalia, St. Johns and DeWitt parishes and their efforts over the past year. Attendance hit a record, with 305 attendees.

LCCSS delivers hope to 119 people Thirteen volunteers gathered on Dec. 14 to assemble 68 food and gift boxes for Livingston County Catholic Social Services’ annual delivery to home-bound senior citizens, as well as a few families.

All items were donated, thanks to: Dearborn Sausage Co., Corrigan, Waldecker of Brighton, St. Mary Magdalen, St. Mary School, St. Patrick School, St. Agnes Altar Society, St. Augustine, St. John’s, Holy Spirit, St. Joe’s Ladies Tea, Thomas Kellogg, D.D.S., Howell Pediatrics, VG’s Food Center and Pharmacy of Howell, Meijer of Howell, Howell Police Dept., Lester Vincent, Richard Lim and family, Ladies of the Ancient Order of Hibernians, Classic Legends, the Rice Bowl Grant and several anonymous donors.

Flushing area pastors create new nonprofit Seven pastors of Christian churches in the greater Flushing area have collaborated to create the Flushing Christian Outreach Center (FCOC), a nonprofit agency which opened its doors Jan. 16. The mission of the FCOC is to respond to the physical, spiritual and emotional needs of people in the greater Flushing area. The building is located at 201 North McKinley Road near downtown Flushing; the property was purchased by the Flushing Council of the Knights of Columbus and given to the Diocese of Lansing, which then leased it at low cost to the agency. For more information on volunteering or donating, please see www.FlushingChristianOutreach.org.

Requiescat in pace Deacon Santos Ceballos died Dec. 21. We extend our sincere sympathy to his wife, Hilda and their family.

FAITH Magazine

FM0307 layout-back.indd 28

28

March 2007 | www.FAITHmag.com

A new look for an important process The planning process for the future of our parishes has a new look.

This logo: “The Diocese of Lansing – planning tomorrow’s churches” is shown below.

Whenever you see it – in the pages of FAITH, on the Web or in your parishes – there’s information about the work of the Diocesan Coordinating Commission.

Pinckney’s St. Mary students featured on Christmas Music CD St. Mary School third-and fourth-graders joined parish musical ensemble SILK in the recording of its Christmas spoken word and music collection, A Christmas Cantata. St. Mary students joined voices as part of the CD’s We Three Kings choir; the production also included members of the parish as well as third-grade teacher Julie Haberl on flute.

Grand Blanc students raise funds for the needy The students of Holy Family Parish raised $5,300 during Advent; the money went to Heifer International, an organization that supplies needy people around the world with animals, such as dairy heifers, rabbits, goats, sheep and llamas. This provides families with a source of food and possible income. The money raised by Holy Family will give more than 30 families an animal.

Adrian native enters candidacy with Adrian Dominican Sisters Ashley Gonzalez celebrated her Rite of Entrance into Candidacy with the Adrian Dominican Sisters Jan. 2. Ashley holds a bachelor’s degree in finance and business administration from Siena Heights DIOC ES E OF LANS I NG NG NI University. She entered the RCIA at St. Mary’s ParAN PL tomorrow’s churches ish in Adrian and was baptized and confirmed in the Catholic Church in 2006.

Answer to Bible Quiz (page 13): Seth

1/23/07 4:21:01 PM

i n t e r v i e w

A scene from Bridge to Tarabithia

FAITH talks with

Also, the book goes through three seasons – they condensed it into one season .

The book deals heavily with the theme of death – is that hard for children to deal with?

I don’t think any of us are ready to deal with that, unless we are total saints.

Even when we are sick or old, we have trouble adjusting.

Two of my children lost friends by the time they were 8 years old. People have said the topic of death is not age-appropriate for a 10-year-old. Maybe not, but it happens. I think they’d rather read it in the book before they have to meet it in their lives.

author of Bridge to Tarabithia

F

AITH Magazine talked with Katherine Paterson, author of Bridge to Terabithia, winner of the Newbery Award, and the basis for a new movie by Disney.

How involved were you in making this movie?

I wasn’t involved at all the first time this was made into a film. But for this new one, I had given the rights to my son, David, who is a playwright and screenwriter. David sent me the shooting script and asked me to comment on it and I did. Although he had written an original script, there had been extensive rewrites. So, there were a lot of things I was worried about, as you can imagine.

How does the movie differ from the book?

The chief departure from the book is time – the book was published 30 years ago and they felt it would be better to try to set it in the present. Of course, that makes certain other changes inevitable.

China and I grew up speaking Chinese and English equally well.

My childhood was very torn up because of World War II. After the war, we were never able to go home again.

What was it like being a missionary yourself?

I grew up wanting to go back to China because that was home.

But China was not open, so I couldn’t return. I had a friend in seminary who was Japanese and persuaded me to go to Japan.

I had never dreamed I would go there because, when I was a child, the Japanese were the soldiers and bombers. But my friend told me that if I gave the Japanese people a chance, I would learn to love them. So I went to Japan – and to be loved by people you thought you hated is a very humbling and wonderful experience.

We should all have it.

And the specific impetus for this story was the death of one of your son’s friends by lightning strike, wasn’t it?

Yes, my son David’s best friend, a little girl, was killed by lightning. I was writing out of that tragedy – trying to make sense of something that didn’t make sense.

What is the overall theme for the book and movie?

It’s hard for me to put into a sentence. The end of the book is a very important element – the main character’s interaction with his sister is a resurrection moment.

I’d like people to go to the movie with an open heart. I’ve been a little distressed by the trailer, which has made it seem like an adventure story. It’s not really like that. When they showed the trailer to my son, he said, “My mom’s going to hate it.”

Tell us a little about your own childhood – your parents were missionaries in China?

Yes, I lived in a compound in

To read the expanded version of Katherine Paterson’s interview, go to www.FAITHmag.com.

By Elizabeth Solsburg

FM0307 layout-back.indd 29

1/23/07 4:21:07 PM

c o m m u n i t y

things to do: At the Weber Center

March café Events St. Agnes Church, Flint will host the Sunday Lenten series Love in Words and Deeds from 12:30-1:30 p.m. Feb. 25, March 4, 11, 18 and 25. Light refreshments provided; for more information call 810.785.3483.

The annual National Conference for Catechetical Leadership will be held in Columbus, Ohio, April 22-26. Ask your DRE for information or see www.nccl. org to access program and registration information.

Renowned author Scott Hahn will be speaking at St. Mary Parish, Westphalia on Sat., Feb. 24 from 12:30-6 p.m.

Applications can be downloaded at www.stmarychurch.net; pre-registration is $10 for adults and $5 for students under 18. Priests and religious are free.

The Social Ministry Commission of St. Casimir Parish in Lansing will sponsor a program on environmental concerns on April 10. The program will begin at 7 p.m. but will be preceded by Mass at 6 p.m., followed by a free soup supper at 6:30 p.m. For more information, contact Paula Young at young@stcas.org.

A Lenten Retreat Experience with Mark Price Ministries will be hosted by St. Mary Magdalen Parish, Brighton.

Bible-based theatrical presentations bring the Gospels to life.

7-9:30 p.m. on March 11-13.

Call 810.229.8624 for more information.

The Weber Center in Adrian will host A Holy Week RetreatPaschal Mystery: Wisdom for Life April 1-5 from Sunday, 7:30 p.m. to Holy Thursday, 10 a.m. Single occupancy cost is $300. Living Mindfully throughout the Day will take place April 20-22 from Friday, 7:30 p.m. to Sunday, 1 p.m..

Single occupancy cost is $250. For more information, please see www. webercenter.org At the St. Francis Retreat Center Call 866.669.8321 for more information March 10: Women Friends/ Sister Friends Retreat Day March 14: An evening of Celtic spirituality March 15: A Lenten Day of Spirituality with Father Larry Delaney March 16: No Teacher Left Behind Retreat Day March 17: Pruning Techniques March 24: Knitting/Crocheting into the Mystery March 27-28: Quilting Retreat

St. Patrick Catholic Men’s Spiritual Movement will host Fr. Karl Pung, Thurs., March 15 from 7-9 p.m. at St. Patrick’s in Brighton. All men are welcome; call Mike Rutkowski for more information 810.229.9863.

World Marriage Day celebrations will take place on Sat., Feb. 24 at Immaculate Heart of Mary Church, Lansing at 4:30 p.m. with Mass. Reception will follow at the IHM Family Center.

For more information, call Scott and Jane Cunningham at 517.434.7389.

The next Worldwide Marriage Encounter date is April 20-22 in Flint. To register for a weekend, please contact Shawn and Kelly Littrell at 810.588.6551.

Divorce and Beyond – Recovery and Healing classes will take place Friday evenings from 7-8:30 p.m. Feb. 2 to March 30 at St. Mary Magdalen, Brighton. To register, please call 810.229.8624; there is a fee of $10.

Luck of the Irish Super Draw Party and Raffle at Holy Family School, Grand Blanc. Top prize is $25,000 and there are 14 more! The $100 raffle ticket also admits two adults to the St. Patrick’s Day party at the parish center, March 17, 7-11 p.m.

Sales limited to 1,000 tickets.

(License R89152) Holy Redeemer Catholic Church Council of Catholic Women will hold its annual women’s retreat, March 10, 8:30 a.m.-1 p.m. $10 cost includes lunch. Speakers will be Father Gary McInnes, Cindy Keil and Lyn Salata. Call 810.694.6842.

The Men’s Cursillo will take place March 8-11 and the Women’s Cursillo on March 22-25 at Camp Dainava, which is located five miles west of Manchester. For applications and more information, contact Maria Jaimez in Adrian at 517.265.2720 or Msgr. Fedewa in Lansing at 989.587.4379; you may visit their Web site at www.lansingcursillo.org.

April is Alcohol Awareness Month. If you or loved ones are having problems, please contact the parish representative for the Bishop’s Council on Alcohol and Other Drugs at your local parish; if one is not available, contact Bob LaPrad at 517.694.8819.

Are you 21 to 35 years of age and single? A REFRESH weekend encounter may be for you. The next weekend will be held in Howell, March 23-25. For more information, please contact Jennifer at 248.408.1378 or Nick at 734.752.5480.

The Diocese of Lansing Office of Pastoral Planning features good ideas from local parishes on the diocesan Web site each month. Click on the Sharing the Wealth link to see what’s there. This month’s feature is the lively intergenerational catechesis programs at St. Mary on the Lake, Manitou Beach and St. Mary, Flint.

Announcing events in FAITH: Send an e-mail with your information to esolsburg@faithpublishingservice.com. The deadline for the May issue is March 7.

Please give generously to the Genesee County United Lenten Appeal.

FM0307 layout-back.indd 30

1/23/07 4:21:24 PM

l a s t

The Father Charles Irvin Scholarship Essay Contest High-school seniors who attend Catholic schools, or who are active in their parish’s youth group or religious education programs, are invited to submit an essay of 1,100 to 1,200 words on the following topic: Tell us a personal story illustrating how being part of a parish community has impacted your own faith journey. fr. charles irvin writing scholarship for high school seniors

theme: Tell us a personal story illustrating how being part of a parish community has impacted your own faith journey.

$1,000

+

write win $1,000 and have your work published in FAITH Magazine

entries due april 20 sponsored by faith magazine

There will be a prize of $1,000 awarded for the essay that best reflects the theme and demonstrates excellence in writing. Complete rules are available on www. faithmag.com or from your DRE or teacher. All essays MUST be submitted by a teacher in a Catholic school, a DRE/CYM or a pastor.

FAITH will not accept direct submissions.

March Readings Sunday, March 4 Second Sunday of Lent Gen 15:5-12,17-18 Ps 27:1,7-9,13-14 Phil 3:17-4:1 or Phil 3:20-4:1 Luke 9:28b-36 Sunday, March 11 Third Sunday of Lent Exod 3:1-8a,13-15 Ps 103:1-4,6-8,11 1 Cor 10:1-6,10-12 Luke 13:1-9 or for the First Scrutiny of the Elect: Exod 17:3-7 Ps 95:1-2,6-9 Rom 5:1-2,5-8 John 4:5-42 or John 4:5-15,19b26,39a,40-42 Sunday, March 18 Fourth Sunday of Lent (Laetare Sunday) Josh 5:9a,10-12 Ps 34:2-7

2 Cor 5:17-21 Luke 15:1-3,11-32 or for the Second Scrutiny of the Elect: 1 Sam 16:1b,67,10-13a Ps 23:1-6 Eph 5:8-14 John 9:1,69,1317,34-38 Sunday, March 25 Fifth Sunday of Lent Isa 43:16-21 Ps 126:1-6 Phil 3:8-14 John 8:1-11 or for the Third Scrutiny of the Elect: Ezek 37:12-14 Ps 130:1-8 Rom 8:8-11 John 11:1-45 or John 11:3-7,17,2027,33b-45

w o r d

Let go and let God

reliance on God vs. self-control

Selfcontrol is an attractive and desirable virtue.

It involves discipline, the sort of discipline one must have in order to be successful.

H

ow can we reconcile the meaning of the phrase “Let go and let God” with the virtue of self-control? Don’t the two ideas conflict with each other? Well, no they don’t because the two ideas are dealing with different aspects of living with ourselves and living with others.

Self-control is an attractive and desirable virtue.

It involves discipline, the sort of discipline one must have in order to be successful. Take star athletes, for instance.

They must have discipline and self-control in order to be the best in their sports. If they have no discipline and eat what they want, drink what they want, fail to train, fail to maintain their health and just “let themselves go,” they will lose their strength, coordination and all those other things that allow them to be the stars that they are.

The same is true in other areas, like relating. Can you relate to others in love and friendship if you allow your feelings of anger to go out of control? And then there are your feelings of resentment, or inferiority, or jealousy. As a matter of fact, all of your feelings, urges and drives have to be controlled if you are going to relate well with others.

I don’t mean they have to be suppressed, squashed or denied. I mean, rather, that they have to be channeled and focused. Feelings are not necessarily bad.

But like the energy we call electricity, they have to be channeled and focused in order that they can energize us.

Letting go and letting God has to do with trying to manage outcomes. In much of life, all we can do is give the best of our time and energy to our projects and relationships, and then not try to control the outcomes. We have to recognize that we are not the center of the universe, that we have to fit ourselves into the larger scheme of things that exist outside of us, all the while remembering that God has his projects and plans too.

If we are going to live successfully and lovingly with others, we have to rein in our desire to control them. We cannot control what they think and what they feel, along with trying to manipulate and control their decisions. We have to respect their freely-willed choices just as God respects them. Does God control your choices? Why, then, do you think you have the right to control the choices of others around you? Or control outcomes?

Letting go and letting God means we have to treat others in the same way God treats them.

– Fr. Charles Irvin

FM0307 layout-back.indd 31

1/23/07 4:21:32 PM

How long could you hang on?

What would you give up to keep your grip?

Clothes? Medicine? Food? These are the kind of tough choices 37 million Americans living in poverty will be making today. Find out what you can do to help. Join the numbers who care.

Go to www.povertyusa.org and get involved.

Catholic Campaign for Human Development

For a two person household, the poverty line is $12,755.

Dinner with SpongeBob … on vacation with a “stalker”… the saddest day of summer… these are just some of the experiences you’ll read about in Marybeth Hicks’ new collection of family columns, The Perfect World Inside My Minivan – One Mom’s Journey Through the Streets of Suburbia, now available from FAITH Publishing Service.

notes:

FM0307 layout-back.indd 32

1/23/07 4:21:44 PM