SOUTHERN WITH A GAY TWIST
10.09.15 V6-22
Atlanta Pride 2015
Always Fresh In Atlanta ARPINO & ANDERSON
more than just a rainbow
+ PHOTO BY: JOSH HOBGOOD
PLEASE DON’T STOP THE MUSIC
Perfect for the Happy Couple
MODERN LUXE
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Celebrating 25 Years of Living Modern MIDTOWN: 1747 Cheshire Br. Rd. Atlanta 404 • 607 • 9098
M O D E R N V I N TA G E
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OUTLET: 6353 Warren Dr. Norcross GA 404 • 840 • 7056
FENUXE Contents
10.09.2015
08
CALENDAR: 8 THINGS TO DO
13
2015 ATLANTA PRIDE GUIDE
14
GAY MAP OF ATLANTA
26
OUT & ABOUT PHOTOS
38
PLEASE DON’T STOP THE MUSIC
42 44 51 60
Always Fresh In Atlanta ARPINO & ANDERSON pg 54
BEACH DREAMS Q&A HEY GIRL HEY GAY NEWS
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25 Years of Believing Every Life Deserves Hope
SUN OCT 18 | Piedmont Park
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DOWNTOWN ARTS Elevate Atlanta offers music & dance performances, public art installations, gallery exhibits, and street art in downtown Atlanta involving 100 artists. The goal of this year’s event will be to generate a heightened sense of pride in the city of Atlanta and what it offers to the nation and the world. 9-day celebration of what makes Atlanta unique and special through visual art, performances and events that showcase Atlanta – past, present and future. Free.
FESTIVAL
FUN
FALL FESTIVAL ON PONCE
WHISKIES OF THE WORLD
October 17th & 18th , 11AM6PM The festival features 125 exhibits of fine arts and crafts, folk art, food trucks, and acoustic music in historic Olmsted Linear Park at N Ponce De Leon Ave NE. Admission is free.
Whiskies of the World® Expo & Artisanal Spirits Fest brings together distillers from around the world to share their finest spirits and knowledge with whisky enthusiasts. Discover the Art of Whisky in the company of connoisseurs and whisky celebrities. Hundreds of whiskies to sample. Buffet and Cigar. Event will be held at the Grand Hyatt Hotel. For more info visit; www. whiskiesoftheworld.com
08: October 9, 2015
OCT 17
OCT. 16
BEER
COCKTAILS AT THE AQUARIUM
DECATUR BEER FESTIVAL
October 16th 6PM-9PM Explore the Georgia aquarium; enjoy live music, cocktails and Tapas at Sips Under The Sea. This month the event is a Halloween party and murder mystery theme. This event is for adults 21 and up and you must have an ID. For more info please visit; www. georgiaaquarium.org
October 17th, 12 Noon-5PM Enjoy an afternoon of beer tasting and music on the square in downtown Decatur. Each ticket includes a special tasting glass and unlimited sips from more than 80 breweries. For more information including tickets, list of breweries and bands go to; www. decaturbeerfestival.org
CHARITY FESTIVAL
HOT AIR BALLOON FESTIVAL October 23rd & 24th. It’s Owl-O-Ween at KSU and time for the annual hot air balloon festival featuring; balloon rides, balloon glows, trickor-treating, food, beer tents, vendors, and entertainers. Located at Kennesaw State University Sports and Entertainment Park.
OCT 24-25
OCT 17-18
October 10th& 11th, 17th & 18th. There are over 300 vendors with handmade, handcrafted items, as well as many on-site demonstrations of how selected types of crafts are made. This year promises many new crafts as well as favorites from past festivals. There is a parade and antique car show. Visit www.georgiaapplefestival.org for more info.
FUN
ARTS
OCT 3-4 05.03.15
APPLE FESTIVAL IN ELLIJAY
OCT 15-23
FESTIVAL
OCT 23
OCTOBER
CALENDAR
ARTS
ATLANTA ARTS FESTIVAL
This autumn Festival of excellence in the arts is an event dedicated to bringing together outstanding artists from throughout the country with the large and enthusiastic art buying community of the Atlanta area. The event features; Artist Demonstrations, Classes, Live Entertainment Festival Food, Beverages and Merchandise and has Free Admission. atlantaartsfestival.com
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Mike Stone - PUBLISHING/PRODUCTION Dino Thompson-Sarmiento - SENIOR WRITER Peter Garnet - WRITER Mark Cook - FASHION PRODUCTION
ATLANTA MARKETING
Jeff Anderson | 404.835.2016 - Sales Manager
OUR PAST OUR PRESENT PARADE & MARCHES ALL PEOPLE AND GROUPS ARE INVITED TO MARCH IN THE PARADE’S RACIAL JUSTICE SOLIDARITY COALITION.
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To advertise, please call 404.835.2016 email info@fenuxe.com or visit www.fenuxe.com Published by TW Media Group © 2015 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. 1599-A Memorial Drive, Atlanta GA, 30317 Phone: 404.835.2016 | Fax: 404.835.2356 Opinions and claims made by advertisers are those of the advertisers only. Fenuxe accepts no liability for any claims made by advertisers. The views and opinions expressed in this issue are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of any agency of TW Media Group.
TRANS MARCH
OCT. 10, 2015 @ 2:00PM
DYKE MARCH
OCT. 10, 2015 @ 6:00PM
ATLANTA PRIDE PARADE OCT. 11, 2015 @ 1:00PM
45
YEARS
OF PRIDE
Fenuxe is proud to support:
FOR FULL SCHEDULE AND MORE MARCH AND PARADE DETAILS, VISIT: ATLANTAPRIDE.ORG
COVER BY JOSH HOBGOOD
Your Inside Guide To
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14: October 9, 2015
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For more information, please call Heather Isaac at 678.627.0772. In the Atlanta division, the Towns at Druid Hills and Towns at Breton Ridge communities only, homebuyers for to-be built homes on accepted purchase agreements signed between October 1, 2015 and October 31, 2015 are eligible to receive $15,000 use how you choose; can be used towards MyStyle® Design Center Options and/or closing costs when using RMC Mortgage® and/or lot premiums. Buyer also eligible to receive up to $5,000 in Closing Costs. Closing cost assistance available from Ryland Homes to those financing through RMC Mortgage® Corporation and closing with a closing attorney selected by Ryland. Amount of closing cost assistance may vary by product and community, and is subject to applicable contribution limitations. For all financing promotions, see a RMC Mortgage® Corporation Loan Officer for details. Buyers financing through RMC Mortgage® Corporation and who complete a loan application by October 31, 2015 on above promotion are also are eligible to receive waived 1% Origination Fee (value amount is 1% of mortgage amount). RMC Mortgage® Corporation may withdraw this offer and change without notice. Please contact a RMC Mortgage® Corporation Loan Officer for details. RMC Mortgage® Corporation is located at 1000 Mansell Exchange West, Suite 200, Alpharetta, GA 30022 and is a Georgia Residential Mortgage Licensee, license number 24225 and NMLS number 203897. Prices, plans and specifications are subject to change without notice. Photographs are for illustrative purposes only. Towns at Druid Hills and Towns at Breton Ridge promotion may not be combined with any other promotion or incentives. Information shown believed to be accurate but not warranted. See a Sales Counselor for details on available promotions, restrictions and offer limitations. © 2015 The Ryland Group, Inc. RA1994
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NIGHTLIFE: BARS & CLUBS
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Official Pride Kickoff Party @ Georgia Aquarium with DJ Brandon Moses and VJ Diablo. 7-11:30PM Dance Party@ Jungle with DJ Chris Cox and a special performance by Cazwell. 10PM Dance Party @ Heretic-DJ Brett Henrichsen 10PM - DJ Mike Pope opens at 9PM DJ Daryl Cox & DJ Neon with Go-Go Boys @ TEN Femme Fatale Show @ Burkhart’s Featuring stars from RuPaul’s Drag Races. 11PM Heaven Dance Party for Women @ Park Tavern with DJ Ree De La Vega and Yvonne Monet and performances by Eryn Woods and the Maria Gabriella Band 9PM-? Glow Pool Party @ Flex with DJ Scott Anthony and DJ Dub It. 12 Midnight4AM Pride Kickoff Party @ Eagle with NFL Player Esero Tuaolo 10PM
Campus Pride College Fair. (Look for the tent by the playground/pool.) 2-5PM. The Trans March kicks off from the Charles Allen gate at 2PM The Dyke March kicks off from the Charles Allen gate at 6PM Flock of Eagles Dance Party @ Atlanta Eagle with DJ’s Pat Scott, Viki Powell and visiting DJs from Eagles Bars all over the country 10PM The official Atlanta Pride Women’s Party @ My Sister’s Room. 9PM Dance Party @ Heretic with DJ David Knapp 10pm Dance Party@ Jungle with DJ Tony Moran 10PM Synergy Show @ Burkhart’s Featuring stars from RuPaul’s Drag Races. 10PM DJ’s Rob Reum & DJDaryl Cox with Go-Go Boys @ TEN Party starts at 12 Noon and runs all night After Party with DJ Martin Fry @ Xion 3AM Atlanta Pride Parade. The parade takes off at 1PM from the Civic Center MARTA Station and runs North along Peachtree Street to 10th Street then turns on 10th Street to Piedmont Park where the parade ends. Atlanta Pride @ Piedmont Park
ATLANTA PRIDE @ PIEDMONT PARK Performing On The Coca-Cola Stage: Maria Gabriella Band 2PM Wesley Cook 3PM Gurufish 4PM Avan Lava 5PM A Great Big World 6:55PM Rachel Platten 7:50PM Sister Sledge 8:45PM Performing On The Bud Light Stage: Ricky Simone 12:45PM Shantavia Stewart 1:45PM Pale Clear 2:30PM French Chevelle 3:15PM Steff Mahan 4PM Jline 5PM DJ Canvass 6PM The Lambda Car Club Car and Bike Show (Inside the park between the 12th and 14th Street gates.) 10:45AM-4PM.
After the Parade Bear Dance at the Bud Light Stage with DJ Ansley 4-6PM Pride closes out with the Starlight Cabaret featuring Atlanta’s best drag. 7:25PM-9: 15PM Dine Out For Pride Brunch @ Las Margaritas 10AM-4PM 20% of sales go to benefit the Atlanta Pride Committee. Pride Sunday Bear Invasion @ Heretic with DJ Sean Mac 9PM-3AM Free Cookout @ Flex with DJ Scott Anthony 2-6PM Tossed Salad Show @ Burkharts Featuring stars from RuPaul’s Drag Races. 10PM After The Parade Party @ Eagle with DJ Ron Pullman DJ Kraxx, DJ Daryl Cox & DJ Rob Reum with Go-Go Boys @ TEN Party starts at 12 Noon and runs all night Post Pride Chill Night @ Blake’s Sisters Of Sequins Gospel Brunch and show@ LIPS Brunch at 12:30PM Show at 1:30PM
OUT & ABOUT
26: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
LAMBDA LEGAL MIXER PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
OUT & ABOUT
28: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
OUT ON FILM OPENING NIGHT PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
OUT & ABOUT
29: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
READY FOR HOPE @ MIXX FOR OUT ON FILM PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
OUT & ABOUT
30: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
JOINING HEARTS FUNDRAISER @ MY SISTER’S ROOM PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
OUT & ABOUT
32: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
SWERVE PARTY @ MIXX PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
OUT & ABOUT
34: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
MSR GAY 80S PARTY @ MSR PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
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OUT & ABOUT
36: October 9, 2015
PHOTOS
MIDTOWN MUSIC @ PIEDMONT PARK PHOTOS BY: SHER PRUITT
INTERVIEW BY SKIP SHEFFIELD
PLEASE DON’T STOP THE MUSIc Nexus Radio Fights To Keep The Beat
NEXUS RADIO, the first major radio and tv service specializing in dance music, knows what club fans want. They call it the 3Ds: the divas, the divos and the DJs. “Fans want music that fits their active lifestyles,” says Manny Esparza, Nexus Radio co-founder and its CEO. “At the gym, in the car, at work, or just about anywhere fans need some adrenaline pumping tracks, they can turn to Nexus.” Manny Esparza knows what dance fans want because he is one. It’s what makes Nexus Radio different from the larger media companies and terrestrial stations. “We’re music architects and dedicated to the genre of dance,” he explains. Esparza and his partner and co-founder, Gregory Schweitzer, have worked in dance music for over fifteen years. “Often times the larger stations 38: October 9, 2015
are controlled by board rooms and their music is influenced by other interests, and they forget about the true purpose of dance.”
Body”, Clean Bandit, Disclosure, Years & Years, Kiesza, Philip George, all of the Alex Newell records and Ella Henderson remixes ruled the Nexus Radio airwaves.
Nexus Radio plays a wide selection of dance music artists from both major and independent labels. “We support all artists who make dance music, not just the huge superstars who play the major festivals,” says Schweitzer, the station’s COO. It’s common to hear an independent artist like Kristine W following a track by major artist like Avicii. While most EDM stations place emphasis solely on the DJs, Nexus Radio focuses on vocalists too.
“Deep House is a huge trend in dance right now,” confirms Esparza, noting it was inspired by the phenomenal success of the “Downtown London Remix” of Adele’s “Rolling In The Deep” back in 2011. The remix of Adele’s breakout hit was ahead of its time in dance radio, and quickly shot to #1 on Nexus Radio.
This summer’s biggest tracks were the deep house records. Mike Mago & Dragonette, Androma, SNBRN, Tove Lo’s KREAM remix of “Talking
The station launched in 2003 as Fusion Radio, and has won several awards throughout the years. It wasnamed ‘Best Internet Radio Station’ by Promo Only, a notable industry group, in 2012 and 2013. This year, while the station and dedicated video channel were in the process of rebranding to Nexus, the station was continued on page 40
nominated for a prestigious IDMA award. “It basically comes down to accessibility,” reasons Esparza. “Whether fans listen from a desktop, mobile device or wristwatch, we’re there. We’re breaking from the pack of other stations by being on as manyplatforms as possible.” It’s also about developing a community. From its studio in downtown Chicago, Nexus Radio interviews artists, writes blogs, and creates weekly and monthly music charts that are published in publications across the United States. The station also hosts events, including Videotron and a nationwide Gay Pride tour. In fact, the station has a long history of working with the LGBT community and supporting its artists. “We want young gay people to embrace dance because it’s part of their history,” says Esparza, who is openly gay. “Disco has been the soundtrack for the gay community since before Stonewall. “On the dance floor, everyone is accepted and celebrated for their individuality, and today’s EDM world was born from the rave community which broadcasts a similar message; peace, love, unity and respect. Music has the ability to bring people together, and it all happens on Nexus.”
40: October 9, 2015
Listen to Nexus Radio online or download the app to play on all mobile devices. Listeners can opt out of commercials with the VIP option. Visit http://nexusradio.fm
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COMMUNITY
A stand-up comedian that I work with from time-to-time once asked: When did gays get the rainbow? Interesting question, although I’m not entirely sure we “have it.” It’s not like anyone buys a box of Lucky Charms and thinks the leprechaun is LGBTQ. Still, as a teacher who’s hung a giant rainbow flag in my classroom, I know it is a powerful icon. Students see it and immediately know the values I stand for. I get questions about my understanding of, and comments about, LGBTQ issues they consider important. Not one has said, “I love that cereal!” So this got me thinking: When did the rainbow flag become synonymous with LGBTQ equality? And what about other symbols and words? When you hear the word “pride,” you immediately think of a giant LGBTQ celebration. Is this one as predominant as the rainbow flag? No. When people watch the “Lion King” I’m pretty sure they don’t think Simba and his pride of lions are having a gay celebration. This may explain why there is, alas, no “Kenya Pride.” (That and rampant homophobia by the country’s leaders.) Thinking about rainbows and Pride, I figured that the origins of both concepts as LGBTQ symbols would be buried somewhere in the dustbin of history. The Rainbow flag started in San Francisco, in 1970, by a guy named Gilbert Baker. There, he met Harvey Milk, a member of the city’s Board of Supervisors. Harvey encouraged Gilbert to create a positive symbol for LGBTQ people to rally around. The rainbow flag was born sort of. The first flag had eight stripes, including the six we know today: red for life, orange for healing, yellow for the sun, green for nature, indigo for harmony and violet for spirit. It also, however, contained hot pink for sexuality and turquoise blue for art. The fuchsia color disappeared when Gilbert decided to mass produce his original homemade flag. Unlike the Eighties, when everyone from Olivia Newton-John to 30-year-old suburban housewives were wearing fuchsia on everything from leg-warmers to eye shadow, fuchsia flag fabric was pretty much impossible to find in the Seventies. Therefore, the color was eliminated and the seven-striped version was born. The loss of turquoise from the flag has a far more somber cause. In 1978, the mayor of San Francisco and Harvey Milk were assassinated. In response, gay activists dropped the turquoise color from the rainbow flag so the remaining six colors could be split in half and flown on both sides of the street in their honor during the 1979 Gay Freedom parade. Pink, however, has remained part of the LGBTQ fold in other ways 42: October 9, 2015
more than ju st a r ainbow by: R aina Bowe
in the form of the pink triangle. Its start was not nearly as kind as the flag, however, as it was the symbol used by the Nazis to identify LGBTQ people during the Holocaust. Like more than a half-dozen groups, LGBTQ people were targeted for harassment, imprisonment and execution before and during the Holocaust. Each of these groups got its own color triangle, so they could be identified from a distance. The pink triangles were larger than the other groups’ triangles. That made them easier for their oppressors to find. Worse, when the guards were done abusing their prisoners, other inmates often set upon them as well. After the war, many were returned to prison for the “crime” of being LGBTQ. Perhaps that’s why three-quarters of a century later, LGBTQ people have not only taken the symbol back, but use it as a symbol to fight oppression. When displayed, the Pink Triangle is used to encourage discussion about how to prevent LGBTQ hate crimes. The use of Pride in terms of LGBTQ celebrations also has its roots in tragedy. Following New York City’s Stonewall Riots in June, 1969, a group of LGBTQ leaders came together to propose the nation’s first gay pride parade. Held exactly one year after the riots, on June 28, 1970, it was called the Christopher Street Liberation Day. Now, if you are a careful reader, you will notice the word “Pride” is nowhere in that title. If you did not notice that, I am deeply concerned for you. Even so, this is where the concept of Pride in an LGBTQ context was born. As the event was being planned, LGBT leaders frequently used and popularized the word “pride” to describe the festivities. The woman who coordinated the march is, to this day, known as “The Mother of Pride.” By the 1980s, “Pride” was frequently being used to identify LGBTQ celebrations. Today, there are Pride celebrations literally all over the world. Indeed, there are now hundreds of celebrations in dozens of nations, covering six of the seven continents. Fortunately, there’s even good news from Antarctica. There, the University of Antarctica hosts an LGBTQ Resource Center, although it’s still unknown if the LGBTQ community there will be hosting a parade. Given the apparel many people wear in Pride parades, it’s thought a lot of people might freeze to death. The good news is Antarctica is full of penguins, many of whom might be gay. More, given the remarkable organizational skills they’ve showed in a variety of documentaries and animated films, it’s probably only a matter of time until they start an LGBTQ march of the penguins.
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Feb. 13–
Q&A
Q Dear Jack,
I used to love meeting people online, but I’m concerned now that it has become the new norm in the gay scene. I worry that we are all so disconnected and have lost the ability to connect on any organic level. I also worry for bars, clubs, and other gay establishments because people aren’t going out as much. Is human contact going to be reduced to 20 min of chatting online, 15 minutes of sex, and then back to solitude?
A
I’m so glad you asked because this is such a relevant topic. Many of us remember times where we went out to determine if someone had an athletic build, had good energy, and was a great conversationalist. I’m a proponent of getting away from technology and enjoying the company of real people face-to-face. You’re not the only one concerned about the amount of time people spend online hoping to make an interpersonal or sexual connection. Most of us are painfully aware that the time spent chatting online is generally not met with good return on investment. Many times messages are misinterpreted, ignored, or get lost in the shuffle. There are people who boldly lie, or troll pictures, or feel like acting like a jackass is a good option since they are miserable people themselves. We have to be careful about putting faith in online convos as a realistic expression of people’s attractions and intentions. It’s just so easy to have some sexy talk on a hookup app. Entire relationships and sexual scripts can be planned out in detail before meeting in person. Many times when people do meet after an extended time of online romance, it goes poorly since fantasy can sometimes be much better than reality. More often than not, these online passions should remain online or on the phone. Not only can people put out an inauthentic persona, but there are just some attractions that can only be gauged in person and face to face.
There are so many positive life lessons that can be gained by being social with others. We can learn to confront our insecurities, challenge shyness, develop strong support networks, and discover commonalities between ourselves and others. We also learn how to deal with rejection and failure which helps us grow as individuals. It is through these exchanges with others that we become more successful and confident. The other big issue is how many potentially wonderful relationships are missed because we’re staring into our phones. Being online also comes with its own set of acceptable rules and common behaviors that are ineffective and rude in person. On the flipped, there are social skills that are best developed within physical proximity to others. All of this being said, don’t spend precious energy and time on negative people and situations. There are many more you could potentially enjoy. As much as our culture may be headed towards cyber connections, it’s up to all of us to break those patterns. We don’t have to be slaves to technology. If you’re going to use it for initial contact with people, then get off your technologyengrossed ass and actually go do something with someone. It’s much better than making sweet love to a phone screen. Remember, however, it’s best to meet someone in a public place first like your local gay bar or restaurant and not a random apartment. Do you have a question for Jack? Email jack@fenuxe.com for a chance to have your question featured!
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OUR HISTORY CAN INSPIRE HOPE, SUPPORT HEALTH & EVEN PREVENT HIV by: john-manuel andriote
“A PEOPLE DESERVE A HISTORY.” That’s how Larry Kramer--Tony and Emmy-winning playwright, author, and America’s best-known HIV/AIDS activist--spoke about the just-released first volume of his two-volume novel The American People. Kramer has labored over the book for decades, fine-tuning his sometimes fanciful American history from a gay point of view. “I want every gay person to be aware of our history,” Kramer told me, “You should know your history. I want gay history taught in schools. And they don’t teach it.” Being familiar with, and drawing inspiration from, our history as LGBT people can contribute tremendously to our personal resilience. We are heirs of what I call “LGBT America’s heroic legacy,” the acts and words of men and women who chose to stand up for their humanity, integrity, and fully equal American citizenship--rather than accept the shame and silence they were told was their lot in life for being “different.”
Larry Kramer
York began raising money for research and formed Gay Men’s Health Crisis (GMHC), the world’s first--and still largest--organization to advocate and care for people living with HIV/AIDS. Nursing homes, used to caring for elderly patients, were not prepared in the early eighties (or today) to care for young men in their twenties, thirties, and forties. So gay men and their friends created from scratch a parallel network of health care and social service organizations, like GMHC, to care for their own. Back then advocacy included arguing with ambulance drivers to take deathly sick people with AIDS--mainly gay men--to the hospital. Care meant doing errands and arranging doctor visits for clients who were terminally ill, at some stage of cancer, dementia, or pneumocystis pneumonia. By the end of 2011, HIV/AIDS had already killed an estimated 311,087 gay and bisexual American men. Fifty-seven percent of the estimated 500,022 persons living with an HIV diagnosis at the time were gay and bisexual men.
They often paid a steep price: Diagnosed by psychiatrists as mentally ill because they weren’t heterosexual. Condemned by religious institutions. Disowned by families. Even left to fend for themselves in the face of a terrifying new disease called AIDS.
Two-thirds of all Americans living with HIV, and newly infected each year, are still gay and bisexual men--even though we account for only an estimated two percent of the population. (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention)
Before President Ronald Reagan’s health department in 1982 declared AIDS the nation’s “number one health priority,” Larry Kramer and five other gay men in New
Black gay and bisexual men accounted for the largest number of new infections (10,600, or 36 percent) in 2010. Among them, young black males between age
52: October 9, 2015
Specialists in the Detection and Treatment of Digestive Diseases, Hepatitis and Colon Cancer
13 to 24 made up nearly half the total--a 20 percent increase from 2008. For any of us who lived through the dark years of the 1980s--and particularly for those of us living with HIV, including myself--despair can seem a natural response to numbers like these. They certainly make one thing very clear: America is still failing to stop the spread of HIV and is far from achieving the ‘AIDS-free generation’ envisioned by the Obama administration. As I examine HIV prevention education aimed at gay and bisexual men for my new book, one thing is clear: to work, prevention education must go beyond PrEP and condoms. It has to address the drivers of risk behavior-the feelings and needs in our hearts and minds that compel us to engage in sex the way we do, even to attribute meaning to particular sexual acts. Earlier prevention efforts, growing out of a desperate wish to arrest the spread of HIV as quickly as possible, were based on a “deficit” model. They told us simply “use a condom every time.” No questions asked. They assumed we couldn’t be trusted to make healthy choices based on factual information, and frequently invoked fear to douse our libidos.
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Newer efforts, in contrast, draw upon what is referred to as a “strength-based” or “resilience-based” model, aimed at strengthening our confidence, pride and resilience. Starting from a place of respect and validation, these interventions work essentially to build hope. Their premise is simple, really: Men who are hopeful about their future will naturally want to protect themselves to be here for it and healthy enough to enjoy it. “You’ve got to give them hope,” is how Harvey Milk, America’s first openly gay elected official, put it in a 1978 speech. Milk understood that inspiring hope in a gay boy’s heart could mean the difference between a happy future--and suicide. In this LGBT History Month, claiming as our own the powerful legacy of people like Harvey Milk and Larry Kramer, who stood up and now stand out in our history, offers a powerful source of hope and resilience, a solid foundation for HIV prevention and for good health.
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PHOTO BY: JOSH HOBGOOD
Atlanta is home to many great folks. It’s one of the reasons I fell in love with this exceptional southern city. Still, it’s a challenge to rise up and match the A-list status of Richie Arpino and Mitchell Anderson. Arpino is a celebrated hair and make-up guru, who caters to Atlanta’s elite and Hollywood’s most loved stars. His clients over the past 35 years have ranged from Brooke Shields to Melissa Etheredge to hunky John Mellencamp. He has also added to his extensive repertoire the well-earned title of being one of Atlanta’s most sought after photographers. What is Aprino doing when not he’s not making someone look beautiful in front or behind the camera? Well, he most likely is helping out a charity -- whether it focuses on equal rights, saving dogs and cats or fighting cancer. He is one of those rare people who can do it all and do it well. You might remember Arpino’s handsome partner, Mitchell, as the noted actor with leading roles such as Dr. Jack McGuire -- alongside Neil Patrick Harris on Doogie Howser, MD -- and as Ross Werkman in the hugely successful Party of Five. Anderson was also featured on the big screen, with credits on Jaws, The Revenge, SpaceCamp, and Relax…It’s Just Sex to name a few.
wake up in the morning, you look at the world the same way – you share a sense of optimism, courage, trust in humanity, and love. Everything else is negotiable.
The other thing that makes a relationship last is don’t s Anderson currently owns and operates the popular sweat the small stuff and try not to nag. You have MetroFresh to have restaurant in a sense of midtown. He priority, so is a long time letting the little champion of things ARPINO & ANDERSON equal rights slide is by dino thompson-sarmiento and has lent sometimes the his voice and best strategy. Then you’ll be ready to tackle the story to countless organizations. inevitable big stuff. And remember that your partner Today, the power couple joins us to share a little bit about should also be your best friend. There is no one else with whom we’d rather spend time than each other. their journey together and their current project -- a new cookbook titled Food & Thought.
Always Fresh In Atlanta
How did you two meet? How long have you been together? RA: We met at the 1997 Atlanta HRC Gala Dinner when Mitchell was a guest speaker. It was “MTB”: meant to be, as we like to say. We spent the evening together and have been together ever since -- now more than 18 years. As a matter of fact, we had a fake wedding on our first weekend date. After five years of the long distance thing we knew it was time to be in the same city. The longevity of your happy and successful relationship is well known in our community. Tell us why you think you’ve been so successful and what advice would you share with a young couple. MA: Two people don’t have to be exactly the same. In fact, the best relationships are often opposites. The most important thing within a relationship is that when you
What have you both overcome? What have been your greatest challenges?
MA: No doubt all of us have gone through struggles, whether self-inflicted or external. The most important thing is to acknowledge our mistakes, and do what we can to fix them, and then move on. We don’t dwell on them, so we can live each day with new energy. We have been fairly lucky struggle department, but we both have suffered loss during our 18 years together. Five years ago, Richie’s mother passed away just a couple weeks after my brother succumbed to alcoholism. And that was a year after Richie’s sister-in-law lost her battle with breast cancer. These were formidable moments in both our lives and were very tough to get past. But we did. I changed my career 14 years ago, which presented an enormous challenge personally and for the relationship. But with love and care we really stuck it out and made an even better life.
How do you find balance between your family life, work and social commitments?
RA: It’s very important to both of us to keep involved in the community. However, we also protect our private, alone time. Mitchell works sometimes 50-60 hours a week, with early mornings, and it is sometimes hard to then have much of a social life. I am more able to show up for functions, and when he can, he does so on his own. I am the keeper of the social calendar and I let Mitchell know when he can take a “hall pass” and when he really needs to show up. We do try to seek a balance. And sometimes Mitchell has to bite the bullet and take one for the team on days when he’s worked a solid 10 hours in the MetroFresh kitchen. Uber is our best friend. We can go to a function together, and if it is one of those days Mitchell needs to go horizontal on the bed, and I am is still having fun, we can easily get home solo.
Is the cookbook the first project you have worked together on? Why this project?
RA: Food & Thought is our first true collaboration. When Mitchell conceived of the idea of doing a cookbook, it was natural that I would shoot it. The best thing is that we learned over the course of completing the book, and got better and better at both styling (Mitchell’s job) and shooting (my job.) Other than that, we have collaborated on several of my photographic collections. Mitchell is my photo editor.
Richie, why do you think your salon has had such an impact in Atlanta?
RA: I started in the business when I was very young, about 19. I knew it was going to be my career, not just my job. So I set it up that way. I think this has given me a leg up and allowed me to last for 35 years. To start with I had a great mentor who took me under his wing, made me his partner in the salon and expected a lot of me. This was invaluable to my own success. I think we often make it too easy on ourselves, saying sometimes, “Something better is going to be around the next corner.” I have stayed put, building my business step by step. It hasn’t always been easy. But I’ve been lucky enough to have had several employees who believed as I did, that by hard work, devotion to excellence, and by staying in one place, we could build a very successful salon. Greg, Winnie, Rakel, and our dear Gloria, whom we lost a few months ago, have all been with me for 25-35 years. That’s a family. Together we’ve created an environment that is energetic, fun, and, while we take our work very seriously, we don’t take ourselves too seriously. I think that may be the difference between, Richie Arpino Salon, and some of the other top salons in the city. Our clients have a blast when they come here and they always leave feeling great about their hair, but also great about themselves. Some of my clients are like family, and have been coming to me for three decades.
Mitch, tell me about Metro Fresh. How did the jump from acting to owning a restaurant happen? Why
did you choose the “healthy” option – is it something personal or is it social consciousness?
MA: When I was turning 40 and realizing I wasn’t getting what I wanted any longer from show business, that is, a sense of purpose in my life, I knew it was time to leave. I had always been a good cook and believed that food brings people together and fosters conversation, which was basically why I became an actor in the first place. I was lucky enough to meet, through Richie, Jennifer Levison of Souper Jenny fame. She took me in and taught me the business of food as well as an artistic approach to creating healthy soups and salads. It was something I wanted to replicate in my own restaurant. I love whole food and I believe that as long as you’re creating something from scratch, using real, not processed, ingredients, you’re just better off. Creating a “healthy” option restaurant was a no brainer. It’s how I like to eat. It was how my mother and my grandmothers fed us. It’s in my DNA. That being said, I think I also realized the concept was a winner. We were at the beginning of the “fast casual” healthy dining craze.
Tell me about your cookbook. Why did you decide to write one? What makes it different? MA: Food and Thought is a collection of recipes from the MetroFresh menu and excerpts from my daily blog, which I began writing when the restaurant opened in 2005. The recipes include healthy and comforting breakfast entrees, soups of all kinds, seasonal salad creations, and easy, beautiful dinner entrees. The blog, which was originally created to give potential customers a personal “buy in” to MetroFresh, has evolved into an ongoing conversation about life in and out of the restaurant – a stream of consciousness diary touching on food, business, family, and current events.
I decided a few years ago it was time to write a cookbook, but make it both cookbook and memoir, which I think is different in the marketplace. But since I have shared my story along the way, I believed it appropriate to have both recipes and “thoughts” in one book. My customers had been asking for years for a cookbook and I thought the tenth anniversary of the restaurant was a good time to put it out.
PHOTO BY: JOSH HOBGOOD
How have you both dealt with resisting the temptations of the gay man’s life? Men, drugs, alcohol, sex…or did you find a balance? MA: While we don’t really want to go into this arena with readers, we will say that there are lots of temptations out there. And we have not been complete saints. However, we also have full and rich lives we really love. We have people who rely on
us – family, friends, customers, and employees. We totally know that too much of one thing can ruin the other.
Plans on getting married? What are your thoughts on same sex marriage in general? Mitch, you were a big advocate for marriage – how do you feel now? What’s next on the agenda as far as equal rights? RA: We do plan to get married. We’ll most likely elope sometime next year and then go on a fabulous vacation. Mitchell joined the marriage equality fight back in the late 90s, before it was fashionable, so it’s been a cause he’s been passionate about for years. It’s an amazing thing to see such incredible change and progress in one’s lifetime. The work we did all those years ago, by coming out, fighting AIDS, helping our friends as they fell ill, and fighting for equality - including marriage, has paid off. It’s paid off because we persevered. And we became, for lack of a better term, “Normal.” We live a completely open and honest life. We take our friends, our family, our colleagues,
our customers, our employees on the ride with us. And that is the joy of life. Mitchell has a term for it, “the quiet activism of everyday life.” Just by being, simply by living an authentic, real life, we have changed minds and hearts. And now we have marriage equality to show for it. Down the line, we still have work to do. ENDA is the next big fight. It’s inconceivable now, that in all 50 states we can marry, but in some of those same states, we can still get fired simply for being gay. We also have to watch carefully how the “religious freedom” movement plays out. We’re praying (get the reference?) that the golden rule will win out. We hope they will do unto others…
Our dynamics have changed drastically in the LGBT community in the last 30 years. Considering HIV/AIDS, social acceptance, marriage, LGBT families and prep vs safe sex, what are your thoughts on where we are today as a community and what advice can you give young men and women who are navigating these new waters? Do you think it is important they understand what the generations before them went through? How can we keep the history alive? MA: Growing up in the 21st century and exploring one’s sexuality now is completely different than it was for us. With the gift of time, and the hard work of countless activists who came before us (and to whom we owe a great debt of gratitude), as well as the work we did in our time, I’m proud of the world we’ve delivered to the young people of today. Their roads to self-acceptance and self-discovery are much less rocky than ours were. Let’s face it, growing up is difficult for anyone, gay or straight. But at least now there are plenty of prominent, positive role models to whom they can look up and say, “I can be that.” This is, not only important, it’s imperative to progress. Sadly, there are still pockets of intransigent homophobia. There are still too many kids getting bullied because they are gay, or are perceived to be gay. There are still too many families that can’t or won’t accept their gay kids. So our work is not done. We must always remember the work that went into our movement for equality. We must always honor those who fought so hard so that gay people could have a healthy, happy, loving life. We must always keep that history alive. But we must also pass the torch to those coming after us. It’s their turn now. And because they have been given the gift of starting from a better place, they will have the strength and self-assurance to take the message of inclusion, acceptance, and love to an even greater place. These men are living legends and you can meet them either by popping in to MetroFresh for lunch or getting your hairs done at Richie Arpino Salon or at the many charity events they support. I have it on good authority they will both be in attendance at the GLAAD Gala on Oct. 21 at The Estate in Buckhead.
PHOTO BY: JOSH HOBGOOD
Hey Girl Hey! Pride ‘15 Happy Pride Poodles! This is our time to celebrate all the colors of the rainbow and with that, embrace everything that is diverse in our community. I hope we come together as a community and love each other fully, without exception, so that we may be our best. Not just for Pride but all year long! Remember to reach out to our brothers and sisters who might be seen as different and extend your smiles, your waves, your hugs and your heart to let them know they’re beautiful just as they are. You never know how that one smile or hug could make an alienated person feel like they belong and are a part of something bigger. During Pride, everyone’s focus will be on us and as such, it is critical that we remember to love each other. People may yell obscenities at us but if we lead with love, we may change some people’s minds. Remember, we don’t have to stoop to name calling to disagree with someone else’s opinion. I know we are better than that. One of my favorite quotes of late is from an unlikely source. His words are so true. ‘Gay guys who hate on feminine gay guys give gays a bad name. Not the other way around. The rainbow is our symbol to represent all shades in our community. Not just the most masculine shade. Until you accept all those shades you don’t have gay pride. You have self pride.’ Chris Crocker Let’s all come together and support each other and make this the best Pride ever!!!! Please join me Sunday night in Piedmont Park as I perform in the Starlight Cabaret on the Coca Cola stage. I know it will be a great show!
Love and lashes,
Mary Edith Pitts Mary Edith Pitts
PS. If you have any questions, comments or feedback, please email me at maryedith99@gmail or on twitter @maryedithpitts
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Gay News At A Glance UGANDAN GAY RIGHTS ACTIVIST WINS ‘ALTERNATIVE NOBEL PRIZE’ A Ugandan LGBT activist has been announced as the winner of an ‘alternative Nobel Prize’. The international Right Livelihood Award is known as the ‘Alternative Nobel Prize’ for honoring people who would not gain conventional recognition – honoring and supporting those offering practical and exemplary answers to the most urgent challenges facing us today. Kasha Jacqueline Nabagesera, the founder and executive director of an LGBT rights charity Freedom & Roam Uganda, was announced as one of the winners of the Swedish award this week. Ms Nabagesera has risked jail and violence to fight for LGBT rights for decades, in spite of the country’s antigay laws. Homosexuality is punishable by up to seven years’ imprisonment in Uganda under the country’s anti-sodomy laws. The committee announced she would be awarded the prize “for her courage and persistence, despite violence and intimidation, in working for the right of LGBTI people to a life free from prejudice and persecution.” And goes on to state; “Jacqueline Nabagesera is one of the most courageous and outspoken human rights activists in Africa. Operating within a hostile and repressive environment, Nabagesera has shed light on human rights violations, and has successfully used the judicial system to advance LGBTI rights. “She has overcome threats to campaign against repressive laws and uses a range of creative and innovative tools to continue breaking myths
CHILD REJECTED FROM SCHOOL FOR HAVING TWO MOMS. A California Christian school rejected a kindergarten student because she has two moms. Sheena and Lashaune, who have asked that their last names not be used, say a pastor at San Diego’s Mt. Erie Christian Academy told them that their 5-yearold daughter would no longer be permitted to attend the school because of their relationship, according to ABC 10 reports. The descision came as a shock to the couple according to the report since their daughter had already attended preschool there. The couple, who called the experience “heartbreaking,” stated “they would never have placed their daughter there if they knew the school would make such a big deal over it.” They go onto say they are now planning to file a civil rights lawsuit against the school. School administrators have not commented about the case to the media, however ABC 10 cited a woman identified as “Kailyn” who described herself as the director of Mt. Erie, who told them that although the school has a non-discrimination policy in place, that the “Bible says homosexuality is a sin,”
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and stereotypes surrounding LGBTI people in Uganda and elsewhere.” The statement continues: “Nabagesera is one of the few activists in Uganda who has engaged in the judicial process to advance the rights of the LGBTI community.” “When in 2012 the Minister of Ethics shut down a workshop involving several LGBTI organisations claiming that such a gathering was illegal, Nabagesera was among those who sued the minister for violating their freedom of assembly. “These court actions are slowly helping to shift public opinion in Uganda towards the notion that LGBTI people have constitutionally guaranteed rights.”
Kasha Jacqueline Nabagesera
and that “we don’t condone any sinful lifestyles.” However, a passage from the Mt. Erie Christian Academy handbook cited by Salon reads as follows: The school reserves the right, within its sole discretion, to refuse admission of an applicant or to discontinue enrollment of a student. This includes, but is not necessarily limited to, living in, condoning or supporting sexual immorality; practicing homosexual lifestyle or alternative gender identity; promoting such practices; or otherwise having the inability to support the moral principles of the school. A local attorney was quoted in the report by ABC 10 as saying; “as a private, religious institution, Mt. Erie is allowed to bar a student whose parents’ lifestyle doesn’t meet their beliefs.” Many LGBT activists don’t agree... “The least Christian thing I could think of is turning away a child,” Rev. MacArthur Flournoy of the Religion and Faith Program at the Human Rights Campaign said in a statement on HRC’s website. “The message this school is sending to this child is that God is not there for her nor for her parents. There’s absolutely nothing Godly in their actions.” Johanna Eager, Director of HRC Foundation’s Welcoming Schools program stated: “There is no doubt substantial harm is done to schools, children, teachers and families when a school tells a student that something is wrong with them or their family.”
IRANIAN FOOTBALL SQUAD INCLUDES EIGHT TRANSGENDER PLAYERS. Eight transgender women are part of Iran’s women’s football squad, according to reports. Iran does have laws banning homosexuality however gender reassignment has been an accepted practice for decades. Recently however squads from other countries are crying foul and accusing Iran of crossing the line by including eight transgender women in its women’s football squad. According to an article in the Telegraph, Iran’s football association has fielded a number of trans women who have not undergone gender surgery. Globally, several major sporting bodies now allow trans people to compete in their chosen gender
MILEY CYRUS RELEASES GAY RIGHTS ANTHEM ‘HANDS OF LOVE’ Miley Cyrus has been an outspoken gay rights advocate for years -- and now she’s bringing her views into her music, as well. The singer just released an emotional new song called “Hands of Love” about the struggle for equality. It’s on the soundtrack for the new movie “Freeheld,” which tells the true story of a New Jersey police officer with terminal cancer, played by Julianne Moore, fighting a legal battle to secure pension benefits for her domestic partner, played by Ellen Page.
category – but many require them to undergo rigorous tests, and there are few cases of trans athletes at the highest professional level. The Telegraph reports that an official close to the league, Mojtabi Sharifi, said: “Eight players have been playing with Iran’s female team without completing sex change operations.” It also reports that authorities have ordered gender testing for all leading players, alongside the entire national squad. The names of the eight players were not revealed. Despite the country’s ease with trans people, doctors in the country previously alleged that gay Iranians are forced to undergo gender reassignment to ‘fix’ their samesex relationships, Iran reportedly carries out more gender reassignment
operations than any other nation in the world except for Thailand, although the numbers cannot be independently verified. It’s not official government policy to force gay men or women to undergo gender reassignment, but a report noted how “there is a risk that people involved in homosexual relationships who may not be transgender, are pressured into undergoing a sex-change operation in order to avoid being ‘illegal’.” It is important to remember that Iran has gone so far as to execute by hanging gays convicted of Sodomy.
HILLARY WAS UPSET ABOUT CHANGING PASSPORTS FOR SAME-SEX PARENTS IN 2011 WASHINGTON -- Hillary Clinton was furious about a 2011 State Department decision to replace the words “mother” and “father” with gender-neutral terms on U.S. passport applications, warning of the wrath of Sarah Palin, according to newly released emails. “Who made the decision that State will not use the terms ‘mother and father’ and instead substitute ‘parent
one and two’?” Clinton wrote in an email to staff on Jan. 8, 2011. The email was released Wednesday by the State Department as part of an ongoing dump of emails that Clinton sent from a personal account during her time as secretary of state. “I’m not defending that decision, which I disagree w and knew nothing about, in front of this Congress. I could live w letting people in nontraditional families choose another descriptor so long as we retained the presumption of mother and father,” she wrote. “We need to address this today or we will be facing a huge Fox-generated media storm led by [Sarah] Palin et al.” Cheryl Mills, Clinton’s chief of staff at the time, responded, “Reaching out to folks to find out.”
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