08.10.18 V9-16
McQueen and The Human Condition Trending Right Now Your Personal Dress Code
Ask Daddy Beastly & Mary Edith Pitts
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Contents
FENUXE
8
DRESS CODE
16 BEASTLY 22
BOOK REVIEW
24
ASK DADDY
26 PHOTOSHOOT 38 PITTS
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note
August is the last month of summer, Alexander McQueen, who committed so it’s time to start thinking about suicide in 2010. The duo explores the many facets of the designer’s changing up your fashion game. personality that was all about pushing In this issue, we present you with boundaries. trends that will transition you stylishly from summer to (pre)fall, and our That, and so many more stylish, exclusive photoshoot is courtesy of provocative, and exciting reads in this HKT Custom Clothiers – a unique issue of Fenuxe. Savile Row-type boutique right here in Think. Clever. Sexy. Cool. Atlanta for all your bespoke clothing needs. And speaking of bespoke fashion: We have an exclusive interview with Ian Bonhôte and Peter Ettedgui, the directors of the new documentary ‘McQueen’ about the iconic designer, Mikkel Hyldebrandt Editorial Director
6: August 10, 2018
Fenuxe Fashion
By Mikkel Hyldebrandt Fashion trends are a great way to update your look with a seasonal touch. Here are some of the trends that will take you from summer to the fall season in style.
Fitted Outerwear With a chill returning to the evenings and nights, it is time to up your jacket game – think fitted bomber or college jackets that are both sporty and dressy. Superdry Rookie Bomber, $100
Color Coded It is time to introduce the more muted tones to your wardrobe again after a summer of bolder colors. Mack Weldon Crew Neck T-Shirt, $32
Cropped Pants Fancy Footwork Although sneakers are still in style, more classic shoes are making a comeback as the preferred footwear. Dr. Martens Parade Shoe, $135
8: August 10, 2018
Foregoing full length for a little while yet is perfect for the late summer and prefall season – you can also simply fold up the pant leg for the shorter look. Uniqlo Flat Front Chino Pants, $40
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Fenuxe Fashion
By Mikkel Hyldebrandt Most men know quality underwear is key if you want comfort combined with a little bit of luxury – after all your underwear is the piece of clothing that is closest to your body, so why not make it the best possible? Mastrioni is a London-based brand with an Italian luxury core. They use only the best quality for the most comfortable and luxurious underwear imaginable, and the design integrates a modern look with timeless silhouettes. The result: sensual and comfortable underwear that will make you look good (almost) naked. Available at mastrioni.com.
1. Mastrioni Silver Panther Collection 2. Mastrioni Angelo White Panther Collection 3. Mastrioni Silver Triple Panther Collection
Images by Mastironi
10: August 10, 2018
VIP FESTIVAL PASS TICKETS ON SALE NOW DO PRIDE BIG THIS YEAR. GIVE YOURSELF THE VIP TREATMENT AT THE FESTIVAL AND SUPPORT ATLANTA PRIDE'S YEAR-ROUND WORK. DON’T DELAY - VIP TICKET QUANTITIES ARE LIMITED AND WILL SELL OUT! VISIT ATLANTAPRIDE.ORG/VIP FOR ALL INFORMATION.
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August SEBB Bound with DJ Neon the GlowGoBear To celebrate the Southeast Black and Blue kink weekend right the Eagle is throwing their BOUND party headlined by DJ Neon the GlowGoBear. Dance all night in your favorite fetish gear!
MORE INFORMATION:
Saturday, August 11, 10 pm Atlanta Eagle 80s New Wave Music Video Dance Party Requests are always welcome as the 80s-themed music video dance party rolls out every second Saturday. Dance and watch music videos on multiple screens throughout the club.
MORE INFORMATION:
Saturday, August 11, 10 pm, Amsterdam Atlanta
To Wong Foo at The Plaza Theatre! WUSSY returns with their monthly campy feature fantastic – this time with the 1995 classic To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Numar! Costumes, characters, and audience participation always welcome. Tickets through Eventbrite.
MORE INFORMATION:
Wednesday, August 15, 7-10 pm, Plaza Theatre
12: August 10, 2018
Office: 678.298.1600 cell: 706.761.2578
Fenuxe Calendar Juicy Fruits with The Vixen JUICY FRUITS returns to the Heretic featuring The Vixen from season 10 of RuPaul’s Drag Race! Wear your most colorful and bold neon pops of color for the dancefloor and photobooth.
MORE INFORMATION:
Friday, August 17, 10 pm, The Heretic
DEEP SOUTH featuring Manu Miran Deep South is proud to welcome DJ Manu Miran to Atlanta for the first time! His hot beats with a Latin flair is sure to make this queer, underground dance party a must. Opening sets by DJ Esme (La Choloteca) and Brian Rojas (Deep South).
MORE INFORMATION:
Rosé All Day Patio Party
Saturday, August 18, 10 pm The Music Room
Join the Human Rights Campaign, Barcelona Wine Bar and VinoTeca for a rosé tasting for LGBTQ equality. VinoTeca sommeliers will be offering four types of rosé and Barcelona will serve delicious hors-d’oeuvres. Tickets through act.hrc.org.
MORE INFORMATION:
Sunday, August 19, 2-5 pm Barcelona Inman Park
Glamorous Come out for a night to shine in your sexiest outfits of black and gold and undress your deepest desires. Spinning glamorous beats is international DJ Barney Philly. Prizes and surprises for best outfits throughout the night.
MORE INFORMATION:
Saturday, August 25, 10 pm, The Heretic
featured event 13
DON’T FORGET TO PICK UP YOUR COPY OF GOLIATH AUGUST 2018 • v4 i06
UNDER THE SUN
14: August 10, 2018
Guys On The Side There are three common sex roles gay and bi men can be divided into: top, bottom, and versatile. Unbeknownst to me until last week, there is also a fourth. Guys who identify as “side” are gay men who enjoy sex but for various reasons do not enjoy anal — not as a top or as a bottom. They may enjoy rubbing, massaging, mutual masturbation, oral sex, and any number of kinks, but anal sex is a nope. It makes sense. Being gay does not mean you love assfucking, and there are many men who find it unenjoyable. Some may have a medical reason why they can’t enjoy anal sex and are sides by default. Others may simply not find anal sex pleasurable. There are many men I’ve known in my life who are tops not because they enjoy topping, but because bottoming is too painful and unpleasant. Bottoming isn’t easy — it’s a lot of work, preparation, diet managing, and frustration — and some nights I wish I enjoyed topping so I didn’t have to deal with all this shit. While I’m no expert, topping isn’t easy either. At the end of the day, I lean bottom over top because I truly, wholeheartedly love the feeling of getting fucked. The amount of misses, messes, failed attempts, and ass-cleaning it takes to get to that glorified moment is a pain, but once you’re there, you’re reminded why you do this, and it’s worth it (at the moment, anyway). Sides do not.
extension our entire sexualized culture) I imagine side guys feel extremely shut out, embarrassed, and alone. I also imagine many of them don’t know they have a name to describe themselves. I only heard of “side” this week. Would they benefit from learning this label? Would the rest of us? Would our community be stronger from having this word more widely known and used? Absolutely — but I have doubts about that happening. But I wish it would — “side” would break up this heteronormative top-bottom binary, one which we still use to project harmful hetero ideas and toxic masculinity onto our sex world (in the form of bottom-shaming, top-worship, and the common complaint, usually made by bottoms, that everyone in town only takes dick).Versatile guys, like bisexuals, get thoroughly erased and forgotten in our many top-bottom jokes. We need a fourth, an additional word to remind us of a truth that lingers beneath all these labels, a truth we’re barely scratching at: Sexuality is fluid, and in the end, labels fail to encapsulate it. More words to describe sex help break up the idea that you’re all one thing or another. More words in our arsenal chip away at the idea that desire can be siphoned into opposing camps. More words hint that sex is something we still don’t understand, something language fails to describe.
This past week I’ve been thinking about side guys — about the many men I’ve spoken to over the years who do not enjoy sex and feel deeply frustrated by it. These men feel like they never received a memo about gay sex that everyone else received. These men feel locked out of the party and defeated as a result. And I’m sure I’ve contributed to their feelings of isolation. I’ve definitely been guilty of reducing gay sex to a simple experience — putting a dick in ass — and I know many other gay men who do too. Many of us consider anal sex the basic requirement for “sex” — anything else, including oral sex, is simply foreplay. With this hyperfocus on anal penetration as the summation of a gay encounter (and by
That’s why there are so many words now in the LGBTQ acronym now — a fact that many gay elders lament. Identity is such a complex and difficult thing that can’t be simplified into four words, four letters on the acronym. Our identities are so broad and complex and personal. The addition of so many letters, so many new identities to our acronym in the last twenty years, is evidence of our evolving attempt to understand who and what we are. And whether or not you think this is true, elders, we’re closer than we were fifty years ago. Aside from giving space and identity to guys who don’t enjoy anal sex, “side” adds another vital layer to the complexity of gay sex, and by extension gay identity — a department we badly need some development in. Side guys, your word has come.
Alexander Cheves (Beastly) is a contributing editor for The Advocate where he writes the sex column Sexy Beast, and he is copywriter and social media manager for Fort Troff. His work has appeared in Vice, Out Magazine, Plus, Pride, Gayety, SheWired, GC Magazine, Mend, and others. He loves group sex and tiny dogs.
16: August 10, 2018
and The Human Condition By Jim Farmer
H
e was one of the most revolutionary fashion designers of his time, someone whose runway shows were often spectacles of boldness and innovation. Alexander McQueen’s life is brought to splendid life in the new documentary “McQueen,” one of the best films of the year. Directed by Ian Bonhôte and Peter Ettedgui, the film charts the openly gay McQueen from his early days struggling to get a start in the industry to enormous success at French fashion house Givenchy and with his own label later and then to his shocking suicide. The two men were keenly aware of the impact of the designer as they began the project. “We were both very interested in McQueen from early on in our careers,” says Bonhôte. “A friend called and suggested (a film) - and it felt like the right time. There was a strong interest in his life and work and finding out more about him. His story was profoundly moving to us. To us, it was less a fashion documentary than a film about the human condition.”
Photographer: Ann Ray, Gary Wallis, Courtesy of Bleecker Street
18: August 10, 2018
McQueen
For Ettedgui, McQueen’s brash style captivated him. “There was level of intrigue for me about him that was very different from other fashion designers,” he says. Neither man ever met McQueen, although Bonhôte once worked at a club that was near where McQueen had a studio. Key to making the film was capturing interviews with family members and colleagues who worked with the designer. Ettedgui knew, as well, that it was vital to make a film that was as elaborate and as visually stunning as McQueen’s own body of work. The directors had to carefully choose which runway shows they wanted to highlight. “The starting point for the choice was McQueen’s statement that ‘If you want to know about my life, look at my shows,’ says Ettedgui. “We took that as instruction. Which shows expressed something that was important in his story, or was a narrative turning point in his story? For example, his Givenchy show was when he hit the big time. We would look at all the shows to see if it was one of those things, or both at once. That determined how we zeroed in on the shows. We had so many people who knew fashion who told we had to do this show or that one. A lot of words were whispered in our ears.” One of the highlights of the documentary is McQueen’s 13th runway show in the spring of 1999, in which robots spray painted the strapless dress of model Shalom Harlow. It was lavishly praised. The filmmakers were never aware of any overt homophobia McQueen faced, as that the industry is one filled with - and warm towards - gay men. The designer had several relationships with men and even had a marriage ceremony in 2000 with filmmaker George Forsyth, but the two ended the relationship a year later. Two other important people in McQueen’s life passed unexpectedly – his mother and his friend and colleague Isabella Blow.
When McQueen killed himself in 2010 by hanging himself, it was a shock to most everyone. He was near the top of his professional peak, and no one sensed he was unhappy. “I think he was very good at hiding things,” says Ettedgui. “He looked like he could handle all the pressure and come back for more, but I don’t think people realized the extent of how he was isolated. A lot of it was the pace and intensity of the fashion industry.” At his busiest, the designer was responsible for a dozen or more runway shows a year. Even when he had achieved mainstream success, though, McQueen didn’t dramatically change his approach, says Ettedgui. “He was out on a limb doing something entirely original and unexpected, being a storyteller and creating these spectacles that were very powerful and personal to him. Over time, the rest of the fashion industry caught up to him, moved to where he was. He defined what became the industry. Someone would happen in his life, and he would channel that into his fashion. You’d see something else again. He had that early sense of improvisation and rawness – making a dress out of plastic because he could not afford anything else. He was just inspired by seeing the material. He was able to use more expensive fabric, but that doesn’t mean he became expensive. He was pushing the boundaries of what was possible.” In doing their research, the two directors found out a lot more about their subject than they knew initially. Included in that was his collective impact on the industry and with colleagues. “I think maybe it was naïve of me,” says Bonhôte. “I knew it would be hard, but we talked to a lot of people who did not appear on camera because it was too difficult for them. With someone who had such cultural impact, it’s hard to share your memories with the world.”
“McQueen” opens August 3 in Atlanta.
19
OUT & ABOUT
PHOTOS
20: August 10, 2018
M60 AT THE HERETIC PHOTOS BY: BRIAN MCCALL
Thank You, Atlanta! Our mission is to bridge communities to brighten the lives of Georgia's children in need.
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BOOK REVIEW
T
he drama runs deep in your life.
still-closeted, still-questioning boys are not always a good mix.
It goes way back; so far back, that the Greeks and Romans wrote of monsters, lightning bolts, and smiting, and their mythology pretty much sums it up for you. Hera, Medusa, Hydra, Thor, Achilles, deep drama, in “My Life as a Goddess” by Guy Branum, you’re not alone.
He was in college when he gained a Secret Service file, and acceptance for his gayness.
Even before he was born, Guy Branum was a wrong-placewrong-time kind of person. His parents had married because of an unexpected pregnancy before he came along and that may’ve had something to do with it. His father’s parents were cold and distant and that seemed to extend to Branum’s relationship with his Dad. Branum’s mother was a peacekeeper, going along to get along. And his sister, well, Branum barely writes about her, other than her troubles.
> CREDIT | Author: Guy Branum > “My Life as a Goddess”
He was raised in a California farming community, for which he has little good to say. It was a country-bumpkin kind of existence but Branum found a deep love for words; they soothed him, although his large vocabulary made him stand out, often negatively. Most of his childhood likewise had its ups and downs: he grew up watching old sitcoms on TV, traveling with the family, and watching the adults around him. That included an uncle who was a heavy drinker, and Branum’s father, whom he says he never really knew how to please. He couldn’t wait to escape. He was in elementary school when he figured out that he was attracted to boys but he couldn’t be gay, right? Except he was, and when his father pushed him into playing football as a twelve-yearold, Branum knew that he had to use caution. Locker rooms and
By: Always Overbooked... Terri Schlichenmeyer The Bookworm Sez, LLC bookwormsez@gmail.com
22: August 10, 2018
His mother cried when he came out. His father clumsily learned to accept it. Today, Branum makes his living doing stand-up comedy and writing for comedy shows, but that’s just a smidge of what he soapboxes about in “My Life as a Goddess.” Indeed, there’s a lot of lecturing going on here, and while author Guy Branum is surely knowledgeable, pages and pages on topics only peripherally relevant to his life story feels too much like, well, like an interminably long high school class. It’s a good guess that that’s not why readers would want this book. Surprisingly, there’s not much of what readers would expect here, either. Instead of the humor you might anticipate in a book by a stand-up comedian, Branum tells tales of isolation and frustration with his growing-up situation. It’s told well, it gives readers inspirational insight to his life, and the humor kicks in at the back half of the book but by then, it’s pretty safe to say that you may not be in the mood to laugh. Overall, read this book for the memoir and not the mirth. “My Life as a Goddess” tells a good life story but as for humor, that may be just a myth.
Join the Human Rights Campaign, Barcelona Wine Bar and VinoTeca for
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Ask Daddy
Artwork by: Rob Clarke
BD/SM sounds so intense. Is there a lite version?
What is this? I wanted to create a way to discuss topics that some curious people might not have an audience to ask. Sex is personal; sex isn’t always about making a deep connection, it isn’t always about the other person, it isn’t about the toys or the equipment. Everyone has a different “in” to their sex – a different path to the heart of their passion. Successful kink happens when you understand how someone connects to their sex, and you engage accordingly.
Daddy, I am trying to date someone, and they are kinda ghosting on me. What should I do? Great question, boy. Ghosting sucks, but it is a commentary on the ghost, and not you. You must ask yourself what you really want in this. Do you really want a connection or does your ego string from this cruel communication abandonment? If you want a connection, then press on, and ask for some clarity. If they don’t respond to that, or you are ambivalent about the connection, then let them ghost – you dodged a bullet. People prioritize what’s important to them by the time they give it. Understand that people speak in their silence and absence. Sometimes all you can do is acknowledge this and adjust accordingly. The icing on the cake is to have some grace about it when you next encounter them. In this world of screengrabs and newsfeeds, here’s something we forget: people change. All the time. I mean, look at you. Look at your life. Think about your life one year ago. Have you changed? Give the ghost some leeway as they probably have some growing up to do and will more than likely return to apologize or make things right in time.
I could answer this simply by saying “yes, boy.” But, you deserve more of an answer than that. What you see in porn, on tumblr, or as exhibits at bars are one intensity of BD/SM, but certainly not the only level. BD/SM isn’t about the ropes, the gear, the equipment, the lighting… it’s about the connection and the mindset. It’s about exploration and the gentle give and take of trust. Kink, in the best of times, is used to heighten the experience. It can be as simple as going to a movie with Daddy and him leaning over and growling in your ear, “I want you to sit on the other side of me, boy.” It can be as subtle as a boy putting his hands behind his back at the bar to show respect to his Dom or other Sirs that are there. A simple “Thank you, Sir,” said directly and quietly to someone can have a very powerful impact. None of those examples involve gear or force…just simple communication. How you incorporate kink in to your social interactions and your life is up to you. You get to decide all of it. Be attuned to such subtlety – people are sending non-verbal cues all the time, boy.
Daddy says: Kink intensity is a dimmer dial, not a light switch, and you can adjust it to whatever level you like. The boyfriend of a friend of mine is flirting with me, and I don’t know how to handle it. Should I tell my friend? Flirtation is an art. And not all art is for everyone. The best way to handle this is to address it directly with the boyfriend by asking the “are you two open?” This will either open a new conversation or will shut down further discussion and set the tone for further interactions. I don’t know the relationship you have with your friend, if you two were once FWB and would now consider a 3-way, but you have to look at “the long game” and what this may feel like 6 months from now. How you handle this situation is a lesson you can only learn after losing a dear friend over something as silly as what will amount to about 30 minutes of mediocre sex, followed by an undetermined time of guilt, worry, and justification. The uncomforting thought of addressing this directly with the boyfriend far outweighs the work it will take to heal a betrayed friend.
Daddy says:
Don’t shit where you eat.
Daddy’s Final thought We are midway through the summer boy – tempus fugit: get out there and enjoy it. As the Maori proverb goes, “turn your face to the sun, and let the shadows fall behind you.”
Daddy says:
The only people who don’t change are the ones who say “people don’t change.” Those are the ones to look out for.
24: August 10, 2018
So, do you have a question you want to ask Daddy? Email your questions to questionfordaddy@gmail.com.
PHOTOSHOOT
Bespoke, custom-made tailoring isn’t far away. In fact, HKT Custom Clothiers, is probably the closest thing to a Savile Row-style establishment that you’ll find right here in Atlanta. So for your transition to fall wardrobe, get your highly personalized dress code made to measure.
26: August 10, 2018
27
All Images courtesy of HKT Custom Clothiers. Visit hktclothiers.com to make your appointment.
28: August 10, 2018
29
Images courtesy of Teamm8. All styles available at teamm8.com. All Images courtesy of HKT Custom Clothiers. Visit hktclothiers.com to make your appointment.
30: August 10, 2018
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32: August 10, 2018
SWANK AT HENRY’S
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36: August 10, 2018
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LIVE . CONNECTED.
imply.
Hey Girl Hey! Holler Poodles! Girls, I am so done!! I had heard Best Buy and Walmart had a very generous return policy for Christmas and went to return my Sony Walkman I had gotten for Xmas back in 1988. They had the nerve to ask me for a receipt! Now how am I supposed to find a receipt from that far back? I asked to speak to the manager, but he threatened me and asked me to leave the premises. That’s why I accidentally on purpose busted a shopping cart into his car. I mean really, where has customer service gone these days. Isn’t the customer always right? Next, I went over to Mickey D’s to get a value meal. Now damn, I know I’m not the most petite girl out there, but this little dude behind the counter asked me if I wanted to upsize my order? I was defended! Of course, I wanted to upsize!! I am a size 53EFG, and I can’t keep up my showgirl size by eating small portions. I asked to speak to his manager, and when the dude came over, I think he knew not to come between me and a meal cause he comped my meal and dessert. [It could also have been the fact I had not shaved for, and my lady beard was starting to show] Now, that’s what I’m talking about. Finally, some customer service. Lastly, I headed on over to the K-Mark because they was having a special on blue lights. Now, I don’t know about you, but I haven’t seen one of them blue lights. I asked to speak to the manager, and he looked at me like I was crazy. He said the blue lights were for special items. I started to think he had a problem with drag queens and he was trying to give me the runaround, so I felt the need to show my ass a little. He said “Ma’am, please pull up your pants and depends undergarments… Your ass is showing!” I replied you can kiss my ass on the pink and not the stink. Imagine a manager acting that way. In other news, I was just promoted to manager at the beauty shop/oil change. I’d love for you to come in and see me but don’t bring me no problems. I’m a manager, and I don’t deal with no bs! Love and lashes
Mary Edith Pitts
Have questions for me, Poodles? If you have any questions, comments or feedback, please contact me at maryedith99@gmail.com and add me on twitter @maryedithpitts and Facebook. 38: August 10, 2018
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