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FENUXE.COM : 19
FENUXE 1.3.2013
Resolutions: Fitness, Finance, & Future
Tyler Calkins
I’M
PUBLISHER/EDITOR-IN-CHIEF tyler@fenuxe.com EDITORIAL Nico Stoerner STAFF WRITER/content manager nico@fenuxe.com | 404.835.2016 x2 Berlin Sylvestre STAFF WRITER berlin@fenuxe.com | 404.835.2016 x 2 Dino Thompson-Sarmiento Restaurant/Food Critic dino@fenuxe.com ART Josh Murtha ART DIRECTOR josh@fenuxe.com | 404.835.2016 x 2 Tom Dempsey Digital Media Services tom@fenuxe.com Mark Cook FASHION PRODUCTION mark@fenuxe.com ATLANTA MARKETING Jeff Anderson Sales Manager jeff@fenuxe.com | 404.835.2016 x 1 Melody Baker ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE melody@fenuxe.com Amanda Cooper ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE amanda@fenuxe.com Nicholas Jacobs ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE nicholas@fenuxe.com NATIONAL MARKETING Rivendell Media | 908.232.2012 sales@rivendellmedia.com EVENTS Kardon Events EVENT MANAGEMENT | 770.935.0065 ACCOUNTING Paula Clancy BILLING & ACCOUNT MANAGER paula@fenuxe.com | 404.835.2016 x 4 OPERATIONS Steven Cayton CHIEF OPERATIONS OFFICER steven@fenuxe.com
To advertise, please call 404.835.2016 email info@fenuxe.com or visit www.fenuxe.com Published by TW MEDIA GROUP©2010 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. 1123 Zonolite Road, Suite 7B, Atlanta, GA 30306 Phone: 404.835.2016 | Fax: 404.835.2356 Opinions and claims made by advertisers are those of the advertisers only. Fenuxe accepts no liability for any claims made by advertisers. The views and opinions expressed in this issue are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of any agency of TW Media Group, LLC.
Any photographs of persons are the responsibility of the submitter who expressly indemnifies Fenuxe Magazine (henceforth “Fenuxe”) and its affiliates against claims for any unauthorized use thereof. In conjunction with this indemnity, the submitter expressly warrants that use of any photos submitted is fully authorized by the subject and photographer. Fenuxe reserves the right to publish submissions of photographs or other images without providing credit for images. Fenuxe does not guarantee that credit will be provided for any material. The appearance of subjects and contributors in photographs or editorial matter in Fenuxe is not to be construed as indicative of the sexual orientation or personal practices of any individual. No implication with respect thereto is intended, and none should be inferred.
usually pretty bummed around the holidays partially due to family drama and partially due to being single, but this year something new and special came into my life. I was driving down the on-ramp talking to Tyler Calkins my friend about the Ice Party about to merge onto I-20, when all of a sudden the cutest little puppy runs out from behind a little bush into oncoming traffic. Without thinking, I stopped the car and jumped out not even concerned about the other cars behind us. I ran around for about an hour weaving through traffic trying to coax the little puppy to come to me - I even had a driver give us a can of dog food, but to no avail. She ran right into the highway and just barely missed a few cars. Screaming, I ran out into the right hand lane trying to stop the cars - she then turned and ran back up the on-ramp and onto Moreland. At that moment two huge firetrucks pull up and stop. Almost instantaneously 12 courageous firemen and women sprang from both trucks and stopped all the traffic (which isn’t an easy thing to do), but before they could get every car, a man driving a tan Ford Taurus sped down the road and ran over this poor defenseless puppy’s leg which sent her screaming in pain. He then stopped his car, looked at me, shrugged, and kept speeding down the road. The puppy then lurched forward, running on only three legs and parked herself right underneath a street sweeper car. When I finally pulled her out, her leg was crushed, bleeding, and she was shaking in pain. I thanked the firemen & women (Thank you so much Dekalb Firefighters, you guys rock!! If anyone knows who these brave men and women are, please let me know, I’d like to give them tickets to the Ice Party) and rushed to the Village Vets in Decatur. I then called my friend Rebecca Guinn with the Lifeline Animal Project who, without hesitation, said that they would cover her emergency room bills. (Thank you so much Rebecca & all the great folks at the Lifeline project!) We then discovered that her leg bones had been shattered and that she needed surgery or possibly amputation. Within a few hours of putting her story up on the Fenuxe Facebook page, she had secured enough donations to cover her $5,000 surgery, which leads me into my next point: Our community rocks! No, seriously, our community is strong, resourceful, creative, helpful, driven, safe, and knows how to come together. The whole time I was with the little puppy (who I have temporarily named “Little Fenuxe” until we find her a good home) I kept thinking to myself - all of us in this community at one point or another have been this little puppy - lost, alone, and scared. I remember when I first came out, I was lost, alone, and scared. I went to Blakes (the first gay bar I ever went to) and found people who thought like me... who supported me...
liked the same crazy dance techno music I like, but most importantly I found people who accepted and embraced me for me with no strings attached. Many things, though, had to come together for that to happen. For starters, there had to be a gay movement in NYC so that we knew we needed solidarity. It took entrepreneurs who weren’t afraid of being mocked or even killed who created an environment for gay people to socialize and be safe, and it took building a community of individuals who fought (and still fight) for our rights and our way of life. Fenuxe Magazine would not exist today if it weren’t for the contributions of those that came before us and I wouldn’t be where I am today if it weren’t for specific people in our community who “scooped me up” and showed me that it’s okay to be gay - I didn’t have to be that scared, lonely, and lost puppy anymore. I know that you too can look back at your life and identify those individuals who made a profound impact on your life as a gay man or a lesbian woman. This is why I am so passionate about our Fenuxe 50. While we can’t honor everyone every year, our community has nominated 50 individuals to be honored as the 50 most outstanding members of our community. Guys, these people help us in so many ways – they make laws that protect us, advocate on our behalf, spread the news about what it means to be gay from the radio microphone to the pulpit, fight in the trenches with those dying of HIV/AIDS, rescue animals from certain death, foster businesses that directly benefit our way of life, and raise money for those who don’t have a voice. Now, it’s our turn to thank them. If you’ve ever been to a Fenuxe party - you know you are in for a great time, but I have really pulled out all the stops this year. Trust me, you will be simply amazed with the Icy Wonderland we have built to honor these 50 individuals. They don’t get a lot of praise during the year, so please join me in thanking them in person at the Ice Party for all they do for us. Here’s a little preview of what we have in store for you: 27,000 lbs of sculpted ice, a gourmet buffet-style dinner, a sponsored bar by Ketel One Vodka, and performances from members of the Atlanta Opera, the Atlanta Ballet, the Gay Men’s Chorus, and the Armorettes. It will be something very special that I know our 50 will treasure for the rest of their lives. If you’re single like me, there perhaps is no better event all year that you could attend where you will find quality men and women all gathered in one place. It is black tie optional, but don’t forget how sexy you look in a tux ;) Open Admission is $20 (admission only) General Admission is $75(includes dinner, open bar), VIP is $150 (includes valet, private reception with the Fenuxe 50 Members, guaranteed seating for ceremony, and VIP bag).
“Little Fenuxe” To Donate To Her Fund Please Visit: atlantapets.org/donate
I would hope that anyone reading this magazine would do exactly what I did - try to help a poor, defenseless animal in any way I could. That’s what community does. Strangers coming together for a cause. This year is going to be huge for or community - the upcoming Supreme Court case has the potential to have rippling effects on our rights across this country. Let’s start this year right by honoring those who have selflessly sacrificed on our behalf, while we look with anticipation to our bright future. See you at the Ice Party on January 12. :)
Tyl er
Tyler Calkins Publisher/Editor-In-Chief
To purchase tickets visit: Fenuxe.com/Ice Thank you to all of our Fenuxe 50 this year: Anna Leary, Art Izzard, Ashley Derrick, Barb Rowland, Barry Brandon, Brandon Rudat, Buck Cooke, Chandler Bearden, Cleo Meyer, David Janke, Dennis Flores, Dino ThompsonSarmiento, Rev. Erin K. Swenson, Frank Mendez, Heath Loupe, James Randell Chumbley, Jeremiah Lawson, Jesse Morgan, Congressman John Lewis, Former President Jimmy Carter, Rev. Josh Noblitt, Kat Graham, Kate Trahan, Kevin Bryant, Kevin Kelly, Councilman Kwanza Hall, Laura Douglas-Brown, Lena Lust, Lynn Barfield, Maggie Lopez & Pat Cianciullo, Marci Alt. Margaret Cho, Mark Jackson & Tom Schloeder, Mary Edith Pitts, Melissa Carter, Neal Boortz, Dr. Nedra Dodds, NeNe Leakes, Palmer & Mary Marsh, Park Krausen, Philip Bonneau, Rabbi Joshua Lesser, Randy New, Rev. Paul Graetz, Richard Rhodes, Sean & Gilbert Yeremyan, Sheila Merritt, Sister Ursula Polari, The Armorettes, and William Campbell.
FENUXE 1.3.2013
Resolutions: Fitness, Finance, & Future
FEATURES 22 THE BEST ACCESSORY 24 QUEER CAPITAL 28 INTERVIEW: JACKIE WARNER DISHES
F.E.N.U.X.E. 16 URBAN CULTURE HOT CHOCOLATE RUN 18 XPLORE GAY SKI WEEK IN ASPEN
ESSENTIALS 35 36 37 38 40 42 44
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URBAN CULTURE
Hot Chocolate Run
Nico Stoerner, Staff Writer If Willy Wonka were to have created a 15/5K run, I lem facing new runners in the Georgia heat). think it would have gone a little something like this... Are you an avid runner? Sign up for either run and enjoy The Hot Chocolate Run (which takes place in Albuquer- the luxury of being placed in one of the first corrals to go, if que, Chicago, Columbus, Phoenix, Dallas, Seattle, San you’re not seeded. Although the elevation varies throughDiego, and our very own Atlanta), is known as “America’s out the course of the Atlanta run, you should be able to Sweetest Race.” With chocolate fondue, hot chocolate, maintain a fairly comfortable eight-minute mile (providing and any number of other sweet treats waiting for you at the of course that you keep chocolate on the brain), and make end of the race, it certainly provides a significant incentive it to the finish in a reasonable amount of time. to make it to the end. Many runners may not realize that the Hot Chocolate If you’re a beginner, this Run also benefits the Ronald McDonald House Charities would be a great race for throughout the nation. If you’re not already in the know, you because you can the Ronald McDonald House program provides a “home sign up for the 5K away from home” for families so they can stay close by and take your time their hospitalized child at little or no cost. As you can prob(your minimum ably imagine, the love and support of family can definitely speed for this race provide strength to little ones struggling with illness. is 15 minutes per mile), and the cooler Unique to the finish, the Hot Chocolate Run also offers temperatures will stylish running jackets instead of medals at the end of the help keep your body race that have reflective strips to keep you safe. Just be from overheating sure to keep your banana, apple, marshmallow, and pretzel (a common fondue off of it as you break it in at the finish line. probLike I said, it’s “America’s Sweetest Race.”
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ALTITUDE ADJUSTMENT: Gay Ski Week in Aspen Nico Stoerner, Staff Writer Celebrating their 36th year, Aspen Gay Ski Week is the premier gay and lesbian winter vacation event in Colorado, and among the most popular gay skiing events in the nation. Not only are you able to enjoy the company of fellow “family” members, you will be supporting the Roaring Fork Gay and Lesbian Community Fund (RFGLCF) by patronizing this great event. Located in the heart of the Rocky Mountains and only a couple hours from Denver by car (or 30 minutes by plane to the Aspen airport, you princess), there is plenty for everyone to do — even if you don’t ski or snowboard. Of course, if you’re interested in honing your snow sporting talents, you can choose from among the four mountains in the area as well as the hunky guides who will teach you everything you need to know. If you’re looking to get to know other friendly folks, there are also “après-ski” parties held daily,
along with community dinners, comedy shows, film viewings, boutique and art walks, nightly cocktail parties, snowshoeing, sleigh rides, yoga and spa days ... as well as plenty of other “activities” you’re free to enjoy. Awesome events this year include a daily “Mountain du Jour” where gays will congregate, Gay Boot Camp, daily “Friendship Dinners” at different restaurants, a costume parade and contest on Friday, a Gay vs. Straight Hockey game on Saturday, and even a Gaywatch Pool & Dance Party. Now, some of you are here for the love of snow and ice. Are you pros out there worried that the snow will be packed down? Even though Aspen enjoys more than 300 days of sunshine a year, Mother Nature herself seems to ensure there are plenty of powder days and fresh snowfall during Gay Ski Week. Coincidence? I think not. STAYING IN ASPEN The host hotel for the 2013 Aspen Gay Ski Week is none other than the Limelight Lodge in downtown Aspen. Starting at $335 (with a four-night minimum during Gay Ski Week), the Limelight has everything you could ask for. Most of the community events will be held in their hospitality suite from day to day, and they even have an outdoor hot tub area that is sure to keep you hot while the weather is cold. They also have
some of the best views in all of Aspen and access to some of Aspen’s most popular skiing and snowboarding terrain. Nestled steps from Aspen Mountain and next door to Wagner Park, the Limelight is near all of Aspen’s most well-known hot spots. Their finishes are fine, their service superior, and their amenities exceptional. For more information feel free to contact Stay Aspen Snowmass for special rates and to take care of all your travel needs. StayAspenSnowmass.com HOT SPOTS AND RESTAURANTS The Caribou Club - If you want to see some high-profile folks while you’re in Aspen, be sure to spring for a membership at the Caribou Club (or make nice with someone who already has one). Be ready to spend, though. Individual membership for a year covers two people for $3K for the first year, and $2K for the following ones. Temporary membership lasts for a week and costs $500, but jumps to $1,500 during holidays and busy weeks. Belly Up - This small venue packs a punch with live music, great club nights, and plenty of partygoers — especially during Gay Ski Week. Boasting performances from such big names as Rufus Wainwright, Third Eye Blind, and The Shins, you’re sure to enjoy some great music here. Matsuhisa - Known for its innovative fusion of traditional Japanese dishes with South American ingredients, Matsuhisa offers unique food at reasonable prices. Small dishes range from $10 – $20, while larger entrees range around $30. The Wild Fig - The most affordable on this list, The Wild Fig offers European-style fine dining at an affordable price. Large plates at dinner range from $20 – $45, but most fall below $30. With specialties including veal loin, lamb shank, and house-made pasta, you’re sure to love this great restaurant.
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y r o s s e c c A The Best Best Of Friends. e Th e ak M en M d Gay Why Lesbians An Staff Writer rlin Sylvestre, Be
We’ve seen it in countless movies and sitcoms: The best friend for a gay male is (quite obviously) a straight woman, right? All that shopping and girltalk! Bitch, please. She don’t understand you like I do, boo. Check it: We will never have sexual tension. Ever. I swear on my life that I’ll never call you up after a breakup and hysterically cry into the phone that I can’t give my heart away because some of it belongs to you. I swear I’ll never let my sights linger a little too long on your ass/chest/whatever. I swear I’ll never get jealous of your new lover. (OK, maybe a little … but it’s nothing sexual, dude, c’mon.) How ‘bout this: I swear I’ll never get jealous that you’re sleeping with him. Better? You can count on me never to fall in love and get weird on you, dude. Ditto for you and that’s why, at its core, this relationship works so well. We’ll never makes moves on each other’s lover. I’ve had straight guy pals growing up who kicked so much ass ... then they tried (sometimes successfully) to get my girlfriend in bed. Screw all that mess. With you, I don’t have to wonder if, while I’m plaing DJ in the living room, you’re in the kitchen playing that “We’re so bad, we’re gonna get caught!” shit. Ditto for me, my heart. I have no interest in your Mr. Right Now and never will.
We figure out whether (s)he’s into the opposite sex. It’s happened on more occasions than I’m comfortable with. You bring him over, he gets trashed, he confides (when you step out for a cigarette) that he’s not as comfortable sexually with guys as he is with girls. Then he expects me to keep that under wraps. Pssh! Or, worse still, is when you gingerly report to us that the girl we’ve been seeing just quietly propositioned you in the kitchen. Don’t be sorry, boo! We know it’s not your fault and we’d rather know now. Our loyalty is always with each other and we intend to keep it that way. We know what growing up gay is like. Who swapped “Oh my God, my dad said I better never tell him I’m gay” stories with you? (We did.) Who waited until your parents were out of town to sneak you the “Queer As Folk” box set and tousle your hair as you cried over it? (We did.) Who snuck out to the next town over and used fake IDs to get into the gay bar together? (Bingo.) Our one big secret was always safe with each other and we never had to wonder why our bond was so important. We can pretend to be a couple. Your parents always kinda knew, which is why the campaign to get you into chicks was so strong. As if hanging out all the time wasn’t reward enough, it fulfilled your parents’ pushy little agenda. You had me, your silly little tomboy, to invite to dinner, family functions, and the like. Though it was obviously not true, I didn’t mind when they introduced me to their cohorts as your “girlfriend” and, in fact, it provided fodder for us to laugh at after we stole away to the porch to swap “guess who wants to hook up?” stories. We complement one another. If it’s true what they say about the balancing nature of man and woman, then we’re good. You get just the right amount of “girl” with me and I couldn’t be happier with the “guy” aspects you add to my life. We remind each other why the opposite sex kicks some serious ass and prevent the (dreadful and repulsive) man-hating and misogyny that some of the more imbalanced crews stumble into. There are so many aspects to the lesbian/gay male relationship than can be summed up in a single column. I’d love to hear your stories, thoughts, criticisms, and additions. Email Berlin@fenuxe. com and preach it, girl!
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Queer Capital: Financial Challenges of the Gay Community Nico Stoerner, Staff Writer
As you may know, the battle for marriage equality and all the rights and privileges that come along with it has been raging for quite some time. What you may not know, is that although we may not have children, by and large members of the LGBT community pay a hefty price for some of the most common things. Following is a list of some of the most significant financial stressors that face us today: COUPLES FILE FOUR TAX RETURNS Frequetly, gay couples will prepare four tax returns. In most states you can file a joint tax return. Since the state requires certain federal numbers, you can prepare the return, pull off the numbers, and throw it away. Then they will prepare two federal returns as singles. This can frequently be a good deal because a higher earner can utilize more of the deductions (like mortgage interest, real estate, and dependents) and file as the “head of the household.” Since 2010, however, the IRS has required that in states which allow both “community property” laws and same-sex unions, gay couples have to split their earnings 50/50 on their individual tax returns. DIVORCE COSTS MORE Although you may win spousal support when divorcing a long-term partner, you cannot deduct those payments from your federal taxes, resulting in more costs annually after doing taxes. After civil unions are dissolved, judges frequently have to issue a qualified domestic relations order, which requires the breadwinner to give the ex-spouse a hefty chunk of their 401(k). This money is also subject to taxes, however, resulting in discriminatory legal practices. ESTATE PLANNING REQUIRES MORE... PLANNING Tax laws in many states can require much from couples who have “unrelated” heirs, and many don’t recognize civil unions. If a partner dies, taxes can be costly, so the purchase of a life insurance policy helps ensure that the surviving partner has more security and stability during challenging times. Federal law still penalizes same-sex spouses who inherit property from their partners as well. Under federal law a spouse is able to inherit an estate of any size without paying estate taxes, however, a samesex partner must pay estate taxes on inheritances that exceed $5 million, and unless Congress acts soon that will drop to $1 million on Jan. 1, 2013 (by the time this magazine reaches you). This may mean that you need to sell a home or business to raise funds to pay “death” taxes. Also keep in mind that although we can give each other financial gifts, amounts exceeding the
current $13,000 annual limit generally incur either a gift tax or reduce the lifetime exemptions before estate taxes apply. DIVIDED WE FALL Gays and lesbians are the most vulnerable widows and widowers. Partners who are the “homemakers,” without an income or savings of their own, are even more vulnerable when their spouse dies. They are unable to benefit from the Social Security “widow benefit,” which allows surviving spouses to take their partner’s full Social Security payment, and are not protected by state laws that protect spouses from being cut out of a will. In some cases widowed partners can be removed from their residence only two weeks after their spouse dies, by their family. Unfortunately many probate courts still rule that same-sex spouses have no claim to shared property. Wills and Trusts can help clarify the wishes of the deceased and protect the interests of those they love in situations like this. Although life can get hectic and we can become busy, it is important to set aside the time to do this planning — even though it is unpleasant to think about. VISITING TIME IS OVER While heterosexual couples have the inherent spousal rights to make medical and financial decisions for each other whenever one of them is incapacitated, there are very few areas in the U.S. where same-sex spouses enjoy these rights. In the event of a tragedy like this it is important to have filed a Power of Attorney and a Financial Power of Attorney that grant these privileges to your spouse. It is also a good idea to file a Health Care Directive that will provide a guide by which your health care providers and spouse may honor decisions regarding your quality of life and your treatment in the event of serious injuries. For more information contact the attorneys at Kitchens New Cleghorn, LLC. Specializing in LGBT legal affairs, they are experienced and professional counselors that offer the best service in Atlanta. 2973 Hardman Ct., Atlanta, GA 30305 678-244-2880 KNCLawFirm.com
#
Getting Personal with the Trainer:
JACKIE
WARNER Berlin Sylvestre, Staff Writer
The only time I’d ever make fun of Jackie Warner is over the phone. Otherwise, as anyone who’s seen Bravo’s “Work Out” or “Thintervention” knows, she’d put my ass on a Smith machine and make me do squats until I cried. Since we were on the phone, I took the liberty to get a little goofy with the lesbian author/TV star/badass with abs you could grate cheese on. What’s a movie you’ve seen so many times, you can turn the volume all the way down and still recite all the words? “Heavenly Creatures.” I’m a huge Peter Jackson fan. That was Kate Winslet’s first movie, too, and I seriously can’t believe how good she was in it. The role made her a star. What’re some nicknames people call you that you can’t stand? All my exes call me “Jax” and I really don’t like it. Anything that plays on my name is annoying. “Jackers” … “Jazz” … “Asshole.” Kidding! Animal names, too, like “Bear.” But you’re hairless, so ‘Bear’ doesn’t work. No, it doesn’t. “Asshole” it is, then! What word or phrase do you use way too much? “To be honest …” It’s super annoying and I know it, but I can’t stop. I say it all the time.
If you could get into a boxing ring to get out some aggression — a politician, a reality TV star, anyone — who would you box? Good question. I don’t hold onto anger or resentment in any form, so that’s hard to say. Because you work out so much? Exactly! I work out to intensity every day of my life, so there’s no room for it. But I do box. Not as a coach or anything, but I get in the ring with those guys and without a doubt, it’s the best way to get rid of aggression. I have a huge respect for boxers. I’m like a pussycat when I’m done. Ever been mistaken for another celeb? It’s embarrassing, because I don’t want to sound … I don’t know, but when I have long hair, people tell me I look Scarlett Johansson’s older sister. I can see that. When I talk to ScarJo, I’ll let her know she looks like your younger sister. *laughs* Are there any television shows you’re addicted to? I like “American Horror Story.” I’m just getting into it so I’m kinda late in the game. That show kicks ass. So who’s your man-crush? Oh, man. Well, I haven’t had once since … a long time. I guess the young Richard Gere? Gosh, I’m so into chicks, so that’s a really tough question. I guess Brad Pitt in “Legends of the Fall.” It’s the long hair, isn’t it? You lesbian. *laughs* It’s because he was pretty, you’re right! Ever been starstruck? Good question. When you
train A-list celebs, you have to force yourself not to be. It’s important that you don’t treat them any differently from another person. I don’t get star-struck with actors at all … but the one time I really was star struck was with Liz Phair. I’d listened to Exile in Guyville, which was the first CD and it was fuckin’ cool … then was able to meet her through a friend and I couldn’t even hide being starstruck. Is she as hot in person as she is in her music? There’s something about her! I wanna tell you: She exudes the most sex appeal of anyone I’ve ever met and I’ve trained some big names. Liz just … she walks down the street and gives bedroom eyes to everyone: men, women, grandmothers, children, everyone. So it’s not just me peepin’ out Grandma. Nope. She’s just very sexual … she exudes it. Now, if I met Madonna, I would be a mess. She’d think you were ScarJo, anyway. *laughs* When I say “pet peeve,” what’s the first that comes to mind? I don’t like drivers who are passive — going under the speed limit, taking forever to make decisions, stuff like that. And living in L.A., we’re obsessed with cars and are always on the street. We’re busy people, so it’ll make you crazy when you’re stuck behind a passive driver. The next one: victims. People who constantly victimize themselves. Someone who constantly complains about their job, hates their boss, stuff like that. If you hate something so much and you don’t change, you’re victimizing yourself. My industry is full
of that. I deal with it every day and can’t stand it. If a composer were to write a piece of music for each letter of the alphabet, which letter would be the most beautiful and why? I’ve never thought about that. Me either. I just came to me in the shower about 15 minutes ago. *laughs* I’ve never thought about a letter of the alphabet being beautiful, but let’s go with the obvious: L and P, for ‘love’ and ‘passion.’ They’d be heartfelt concertos, for sure. That’s a really weird question, Berlin. Thank you! So what’s a workout regimen that you wish would just die already? Zumba. It’s just … dance moves that aren’t that effective. Is it just weak as far as cardio goes? Yeah. I think it’s fun, but not that effective. It’s just ... not my style. What about low-to-no carb diets? I don’t know WHY people wanna keep revisiting this. All the science and research proves that low/no carb may last a month, if that, because your body, your muscles, your brain, all that requires carbs to function. Everything runs on sugar. Not refined sugars, but whole grains and fruits and veggies. You’ll fall apart without carbs! They’re 100 percent necessary for health. I’ve got a book called 10 Pounds in 10 Days where I’ve set a very specific diet that consists of 950 calories each day. It’s heavily, heavily researched. The key to it is the kinds of food I’ve laid out and I promise you won’t be ravenous. I’ve gotten thousands of tweets and Facebook posts saying “God, I’m not even hungry!” It’s a really effective formula for safe, fast weight loss.
What? Fruits were meant to be eaten with their pulp and natural fibers. Once you separate the good stuff from the juice, it’s just sugar. If you want to drink a low-sugar juice made of veggies, that’s fine. But once you separate the fiber from the sugar, it’s basically glucose, which is stored as fat. Yikes! Point taken. So what areas of the body can people new to working out see results in first? Where you lose weight depends on your genetic makeup, but people can focus on certain areas with resistance training to add muscle, and therefore shape, to those parts. You could run and run and run and you’re not going to change your body shape — you’ll just shrink. You need resistance training to change the shape.
I bet you get requests from celebs to help them get “red-carpet ready.” Oh, all the time. In the weeks leading up to their event, we focus on what I call the “Vtaper.” We focus on muscles that lend a “V” shape to the torso … this includes lats, medial delts [the outside of the arm], and lower back. It gives you the appearance of a smaller waist. What are some “health foods” that people don’t actually realize are junk? Yogurt. It’s been pushed down our throats as being a good diet food. There is a tremendous amount of hidden sugar in yogurt. You might as well be eating a candy bar. As well, there’s not enough protein to keep you full, so it doesn’t make for a good snack. Why do you think people get offended when shown the right way to perform an exercise? If you aren’t a trainer, you shouldn’t be telling someone how to train. But if a trainer is off duty and sees someone who could be hurting themselves, then it’s kind of your duty to help them. But you have to say you’re a trainer, otherwise it’s “Who are you and why do you think you know better than me?” which is completely understandable.
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I read in your last book that “fat doesn’t make you fat; sugar makes you fat.” Refined sugars, absolutely. In this country, there are three main things making us fat: hormone dysfunction, toxic organs, and sugar addiction. Address those and you’ll lose weight — guaranteed. Also: Don’t ever drink fruit juice ever in your life.
theGAGE Is there an exercise you can’t stand having to do? Absolutely. Whenever my leg day rolls around, I’ll do anything to procrastinate working out. I hate it, but I do it twice a week. Everything else, I enjoy. I can do chest, back, shoulders, arms, and abs all day.
Law Firm
Atlanta’s LGBT Lawyer
DUI
What’s going on in Jackie’s world right now? I’m working on a lot. I’ve written a couple shows and we’re looking to sell those within the next couple weeks. I want to get them into production this year. I’ve got another book coming out, as well as a product line.
Drug Possession Felonies Misdemeanors
Do you have working titles for the shows? Yeah, but I can’t say what they are at this point. I understand. Well thanks so much for taking the interview! Thank you very much! Maybe I’ll talk to you another time.
678 954 5730
Oh, yeah. You hear that? She totally wants me … (to work out more).
160 Clairemont Ave., Suite 200 Decatur, Georgia 30030 S. Derek Gage Attorney at Law
www.thegagefirm.com
NEW WORLD RETAIL STORE APPLE PRODUCT Apple iPhone 5G ..............................................$600 Apple iPhone 4 32GB......................................$500 Apple iPhone 4 16GB.......................................$450 Apple iPhone 3GS 32G ...................................$400 Apple iPhone 3GS 16GB .................................$350 Apple iPhone 3G 8GB .....................................$300 Apple iPad 2 Wi-Fi 16GB .................................$500 Apple iPad 2 Wi-Fi + 3G 64GB ......................$600 Apple iPad Wifi 16GB .......................................$400 Apple iPad Wifi 64GB ......................................$450 Apple iPad 2 Wi-Fi 32GB ................................$550 Apple iPad Wifi -32GB .....................................$430
SONY ERICSSON PHONES SONY ERICSSON Iduo ....................................$500 SONY ERICSSON Experia x1 .........................$450 SONY ERICSSON W300.................................$350 SONY ERICSSON CT66..................................$300 SONY ERICSSON J300a ................................$350 SONY ERICSSON P800 ..................................$400 SONY ERICSSON S710a .................................$350 SONY ERICSSON T226 ..................................$300 SONY ERICSSON T237...................................$350 SONY ERICSSON T290 ..................................$400 SONY ERICSSON T300 ..................................$350 SONY ERICSSON T306 ..................................$350 SONY ERICSSON T316 ...................................$300 SONY ERICSSON W600i................................$400 SONY ERICSSON Z300a................................$350 SONY ERICSSON Z500 ..................................$300 SONY ERICSSON Z 500a ..............................$350 SONY ERICSSON Z 520 .................................$300 SONY ERICSSON Z 520a ..............................$350 SONY ERICSSON Z 520i ................................$300 SONY ERICSSON Z525a ................................$400 SONY ERICSSON Z600 ..................................$350 SONY ERICSSON Z710i ..................................$300
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GAMES Microsoft Xbox 360 .........................................$260 Game boy latext edition ..................................$210 Garmin 396 ........................................................$250 Nintendo Wii ...................................................... $270 Xbox 360 ............................................................$400 Ps3 240gb ..........................................................$400 Ps3 120gb ...........................................................$350 Ps3 80gb ............................................................$300 Ps3 60gb ............................................................$250 Ps2 .......................................................................$250 Ps1.........................................................................$200 DELL LAPTOPS Dell Latitude D600 ...........................................$390 Dell Latitude D500 ...........................................$300 Dell Inspiron 6000 ...........................................$450 Dell Latitude D505 ...........................................$440 Dell Latitude D610 ............................................$460 Dell Latitude D510 ............................................$420 Dell Inspiron 9300 ...........................................$630 TOSHIBA LAPTOPS Toshiba Satellite PRO L10 ...............................$420 Toshiba Qosmio E10 ........................................$850 Toshiba R100 .....................................................$550 Toshiba Qosmio E10 ........................................$850 Toshiba Satellite PROL20 ...............................$350 Toshiba M100..................................................... $780 Toshiba M300....................................................$840 Toshiba Portege A200 ....................................$420 Toshiba Satellite L10 ........................................$430 Toshiba Qosmio F20 .......................................$600 SONY PLASMA TV Sony FWD42PV1 Plasma TV ........................ $1000 Sony KE42M1 Plasma TV .............................. $1500 Sony PFM42X1 Plasma TV ............................ $1100 Sony KDE42XS955 PlasmaTV .................... $1800 Sony FWD50PX1 Plasma TV........................ $1800 Sony KDE50XS955 Plasma TV .................. $1200 PIONEER PLASMA TV Pioneer PDP424MV Plasma TV ....................$900 Pioneer PDP42A3HD Plasma TV .................$800 Pioneer PDP434CMX Plasma TV ............... $1000 Pioneer PDP43A5HD Plasma TV ............... $1000 Pioneer PDP4360HD Plasma TV .................$900 Pioneer PDP504CMX Plasma TV.................$800 Pioneer PDP505CMX Plasma TV ................$800 Pioneer PDp5060HD Plasma TV .................$800 Pioneer PDP6100HD Plasma TV ................ $1000 Pioneer PDP614MX Plasma TV .....................$800
FENUXE after dark
YOUR GUIDE TO GAY ATLANTA
OUTPHOTOS
10TH & PIEDMONT GRAND OPENING 12.9.2012 • 10th & Piedmont On December 9th patrons, board members, hosts, and volunteers gathered to make holiday wishes come true for disadvantaged community members.
TICKETS MAKE A GREAT GIFT!
BLUE MAN GROUP
MARTINIS & IMAX
THE ICE PARTY
DA BA DEE, DA BA DI!
AFRICA, ELEPHANTS, AND A TWIST
SO COLD, YET SO HOT
FENUXE
after dark
G AY P L ACES + S CENES
Bliss Atlanta
2284 Cheshire Bridge Rd.
Jungle Club
The Heretic
2115 Faulkner Rd.
2069 Cheshire Bridge Rd.
BR ID CH ES HI RE
1544 Piedmont Rd.
Cowtippers
Food
Brushstrokes
MO
NR
OE
1510 Piedmont Ave.
Felix’s
Sports
1510 Piedmont Ave.
Leather
Mixx
1492 Piedmont Ave.
Non-Smoking
Oscar’s
Retailer
Roxx Tavern & Diner
Tripp’s Bar
DR
.
PIEDMONT AVE.
Pool Tables
1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd.
1824 Cheshire Bridge Rd.
1600 Piedmont Ave.
Live Entertainment
Las Margaritas
GE
Woofs
The Hideaway
Club/Dancing
2345 Chesire Bridge Rd.
1086 Alco St.
2425 Piedmont Ave.
MAPKEY
BJ Roosters
Opus One
1931 Piedmont Cir.
Hobnob
1551 Piedmont Ave.
Boy Next Door
N
1447 Piedmont Ave NE
1510 Piedmont Ave.
Burkharts
1510 Piedmont Ave.
W
E
AMSTERDAM AVE.
14TH ST.
S
Amsterdam Cafe 302 Amsterdam Ave. 12TH ST.
Einstein’s
F.R.O.G.S.
1077 Juniper St.
931 Monroe Dr. 10TH ST.
The Pet Set
Gilbert’s Cafe The Fifth Ivory
219 10th St.
794 Juniper St.
PONCE DE LEON AVE. NORTH AVE.
931 Monroe Dr.
227 10th St.
PIEDMONT AVE.
893 Peachtee St.
JUNIPER ST.
Bulldogs
MetroFresh
Blake’s
976 Piedmont Ave.
PEACHTREE ST.
SPRING ST.
I-75 I-85
WEST PEACHTREE ST.
1049 Juniper St.
MONROE DR.
Joe’s On Juniper
Friends On Ponce
736 Ponce de Leon Ave.
Atlanta Eagle
306 Ponce de Leon Ave.
Rawhide Leather
306 Ponce de Leon Ave.
Model-T
669 Ponce de Leon Ave.
Not Shown:
Mary’s
My Sister’s Room
Swinging Richards
Club Rush
Sister Louisa’s
The Cockpit
LeBuzz
2715 Buford Higway
1287 Glenwood Ave.
466 Edgewood Ave.
Renovations & Handyman Services
404-583-2212
www.builderbob.com
Kitchen and Bathroom Specialist General Home Repairs Ceramic Tile & Stone Painting & Trim Work
1271 Glenwood Ave.
465 Boulevard
1400 Northside Dr.
585 Franklin Road
Ask me how these State Farm health products can protect you if you become ill, or get injured and are unable to work: • disability insurance • hospital income insurance • supplemental insurance • long-term care insurance Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.® CALL ME TODAY. Cleo Meyer, Agent 1447 Peachtree St NE | Atlanta, GA 30309 Bus: 404-817-0960 cleo.meyer.mdhi@statefarm.com
Jeffery Johnston jeff@builderbob.com
State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company Bloomington, IL
1101399.1
PARTYPICKS The Best Parties
1.12.2013 THE ICE PARTY
GEORGIA FREIGHT DEPOT 7 P.M.
Brrr… it’s cold in here! The hottest party in town will be ice cold, as in more than 27,000 pounds of ice. With a sponsored bar featuring Ketel One Vodka, bites from Distinctive Capital Catering, an ice luge, aerialists, a VIP Blue Room, an ice tunnel, and male models for your viewing pleasure, this is the place to be. Tickets from $75 Fenuxe.com/ice.
1.4.2013 FURRY DISCO BALLS MARY’S 9 P.M. – 3 A.M.
Mary’s is celebrating its 15th year in Atlanta and what better way to kick it off than with a disco party? With DJs Beardawg and Headmaster Ritual there will be loads of cock rock and handfuls of Crisco disco to shake your booty to. You don’t need furry balls to work up a sweat, just get your butt to Mary’s, throw back a few stiff ones and dance the night away!
FENUXE CULTURALPICKS
after dark
1.8 – 27.2013
BROTHER COYOTE AND SISTER FOX CENTER FOR PUPPETRY ARTS
A bilingual adaptation of the traditional Mexican folktale, Brother Coyote wants nothing more than to eat one of Doña Conchita’s plump chickens. Smart Sister Fox is always a step ahead of him, though, and tricks him with clever tricks of her own. Perfect for visiting family and kids. Show in Spanish and English. $9.25 for members and $16.50 for nonmembers. Puppet.org 1.15 – 20.2013
BLUE MAN GROUP THE FABULOUS FOX THEATRE
They’re back, and bluer than ever! This spellbinding show takes audience members through a multi-sensory experience combining theater, percussive music, art, science, and vaudeville to create — well, you’ll see. Be sure to get your tickets today because they sell out fast! Tickets from $48. FoxTheatre.org 1.10 – 2.17.2013
BLOODY BLOODY ANDREW JACKSON ACTOR’S EXPRESS
That’s right! Andrew Jackson screeches into town to turn it up and turn you on! A hilarious, sexy, explosion of rock & roll, this show re-imagines our nation’s seventh president as a rock god/badass/ maverick who fights for the common man and actually looks SEXY in skinny jeans. Provocative, ridiculous, and five flavors of fun, this is a show that will4:20 rockPM your world. PrideMed.Fenuxe_PsychTheraphyAd_01_Layout 1 8/23/12 Page 1 Tickets from $26. Actors-Express.com
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COMMUNITYPICKS 1.5.2013
BIRD WALK PIEDMONT PARK CONSERVANCY 8 – 9 A.M.
Join Piedmont Park Conservancy at the Atlanta Audubon Society for FREE monthly bird walks! Exploring the varied habitats of Piedmont Park, professional birders will help you spot some of the beautiful winged inhabitants of our fair city! For more info contact Holly Hollingsworth at 404876-4024. 10.13.2012 – 1.20.2013
FAST FORWARD: MODERN MOMENTS HIGH MUSEUM
Experience 100 years of radical artistic developments reflected by artwork drawn from the extraordinary collections of MoMA. With artwork from 1913 – 2013, the exhibition includes more than 150 works from MoMA including some of the most iconic artworks of the 20th century. Salvador Dalí, Mark Rothko, Ernst Ludwig Kirchner, Umberto Boccioni, Roy Lichtenstein, and Annette Messager are among the highlights. Free for members, $19.50 for adults, $16.50 for students, $12 for children (6 – 17). 1.4 & 11.2013
MARTINIS AND IMAX: AFRICA’S ELEPHANT KINGDOM FERNBANK MUSEUM 6:30 – 11 P.M.
Often replicated, but never duplicated, Martinis & IMAX offers a unique alternative to the “so last year” bar scene. Join in for a full bar featuring signature cocktails and tasty nibbles before enjoying a journey into Africa for a glimpse of the elephant world. With an unforgettable safari over waterfalls, rivers, plains, and forests — Africa’s Elephant Kingdom will captivate you. Change up date night and do something fantastic! 21+, adults $13, students and seniors $12, members $8.
BROADWAY’S
BIGGEST HIT! JAN. 25-31 FOX THEATRE
Groups Call (404) 881-2000
FENUXE
after dark
Holler Poodles. I guess if you’re reading this column, the world didn’t end as some predicted. So I guess its time to make some New Years Resolutions. Here are my top 4 resolutions for the new year. 1. LOSE WEIGHT! I don’t know about you but I’m carrying around about 300 pounds of dead weight and I’m ready to get rid of it all. Are you tired of some of the people in your life who are nothing more than blood sucking vampires who feed on your life force and leave you feeling like you need a blood transfusion? Well look out girls ‘cause I’m ready to lose this weight quickly. I’m talking Quick Weight Loss! 2. EAT HEALTHY! Clearly you look at my body and know it is a temple to be worshiped and adored. However, someone has forgotten to take out the trash. I make it a point to have a variety of fruits in my life but my doctor recently said I needed more protein in my diet. Hmmmmmm, does anyone know a quick source of protein? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. 3. WORK OUT! That’s right girls--Out! As in Out at Work! Girl if you are still in the closet at work, come on out! The water is fine. It’s gonna be 2013 soon and those closets have become awful claustrophobic. Come out at work and let everyone know you is a homosexual and that you’re proud to be who you is! Who knows, you may even change some minds along the way. 4. WATCH LESS TV! Girl, I don’t know about you but I watch way too much TV.
And what’s up with those damned socalled reality shows faking shit? Color me surprised! Well, in the new year I’m going to cut way back on TV. Except for a few select shows like Project Runway (its the bomb) and Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, I’m giving up reality TV. Well I have to watch Real Housewives of Atlanta so I can remain topical. But thats it! Except for Interior Therapy with Jeff Lewis cause he’s just messed up. Maybe Million Dollar Listing with Madison, Millionaire Matchmaker with Patty Stanger. (Did you know she is my celebrity doppelgänger? Put a black wig on my head and I look just like her! Wouldn’t she be horrified? Oh and I can’t miss Tabatha’s Salon Takeover and don’t forget Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. But that’s absolutely it! Except for Hoarders, I think... Love and lashes,
Mary Edith Pitts Please send comment and feedback to me at maryedith99@gmail.com
WHOROSCOPES : 1/3-1/16
FENUXE
after dark
Capricorn
[DEC. 22 – JAN. 19] You’ve been a real sourpuss, lately. (You’re not showering long enough is all.)
AQUARIUS
[JAN. 20 – FEB. 18] Just because you’re the water-bearer doesn’t mean we trust your homemade hydrocolonics kit. State Farm agent Cleo Mayer pictured with partner Donna and son Connor
PISCES
[FEB. 19 – MAR. 20] Your annoying inability to handle criticism will prove itself at the end of this sentence.
ARIES
[MAR. 21 – APR. 19] It’s not that you have a toilet-cam in your bathroom … it’s just that … no, actually, it IS the toilet-cam.
Taurus
[APR. 20 – MAY 20] You mess with the bull, you get the horns. (Or, in your case, just a wicked case of scabies.)
Ask me how these State Farm health products can protect you if you become ill, or get injured and are unable to work: • disability insurance • hospital income insurance • supplemental insurance • long-term care insurance
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.® CALL ME TODAY. Cleo Meyer, Agent 1447 Peachtree St NE | Atlanta, GA 30309 Bus: 404-817-0960 cleo.meyer.mdhi@statefarm.com
GemIni
[MAY 21 – JUN. 22] Time for some housekeeping! Your sheets could get someone pregnant.
CANCER
[JUN. 21 – JUL. 22] You’ll soon discover that the best way to rid yourself of all that nasal hair has nothing to do with kerosene.
LEO
[JUL. 23 – AUG. 22] We mostly applaud your Cher impersonations because they consistently sound like Chewbacca on Special K.
virgo
[AUG. 23 – SEPT. 22] You know it all too well: He who lays with dogs wakes with bestiality charges.
libra
[SEPT. 23 – OCT. 22] If we ever need to know what you’ve been up to, we’ll just check the blotter section of Creative Loafing.
scorpio
[OCT. 23 – NOV. 22] Wait, you have 41 wigs, but none of them are for your head? Nevermind, we don’t wanna know.
State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company Bloomington, IL 1101399.1
SAGITTARIUS
[NOV. 23 – DEC. 21] You kick ass at camping, which will come in handy when your lover finds out you’ve been cheating.
Trial Lawyers Aggressively Representing Families in Our LGBT Community
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404.969.1284
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ryland.com
Lenox Overlook Townhomes from the low $200’s
Move-in Ready and Quick Start homes available! Community Features: • • • • •
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In the Atlanta division, photographs are for illustrative purposes only. Prices, plans and specifications are subject to change without notice. Information believed to be accurate but not warranted. See Sales Counselor for complete details. ©2012 The Ryland Group, Inc.
FENUXE OUTPHOTOS after dark
YOU DOWN WITH OTP? 12.15.2012 • LeBuzz
Saturday’s crowd at the roomy and ultra-hip LeBuzz weren’t afraid to show their colors. You betta work!
Experience Same location...Different look, different feel. Come in and see all the great new changes we have made and continue to make!! Full gym now available. Large hot tub coming soon. NEW WEEKEND RATES $10 LOCKERS $20 ROOMS MONDAY-wednesday RATES $5 LOCKERS $20 ROOMS
www.flexbaths.com www.flexclub.com
2012
Entrance into Flex now on 4th Street. 76 4th ST NW Atlanta, GA 30308 (404) 815-0456
FENUXE OUTPHOTOS after dark
ILLUMINATE 12.14.2012 • Kai Lin Art Gallery
Patrons and fans of Kai Lin Art gathered for ILLUMINATE, a group exhibition of new works by great local artists.
Vo t
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2012