Notes on Silence The Sustaining Power of Silence A Reflection by Jessie Chaffee ’97
Before I entered Friends in the sixth grade, being quiet was
quiet with their own thoughts. In my seven years at Friends,
something I felt embarrassed about. As a shy young person,
I heard my peers open up about confusion, joy, sadness,
I assumed that silence wasn’t a strength, but something
losing themselves and finding themselves.
lacking. Then I got to Friends, where every day began
And I found myself in those years too. In English classes
with silence during Meeting for Worship. All 100+ Middle
with Christina Moustakis, John Byrne and Maria Fahey, I
Schoolers would funnel into the Meetinghouse—laughing
found my voice as a writer. In drama classes with Jennifer
with friends or dealing with social rifts, anticipating a test
Hayes and music classes with Bob Rosen and Linda
or an upcoming game, self-conscious about the millions of
Monssen, I became comfortable on stage. I was still shy
shifts we were experiencing or impatient for those changes
and often quiet, but less so. By senior year, I had enough
to arrive—and then we’d settle into the rows of benches and
confidence to stand up in morning Meeting and break the
stop talking. Adolescence is a noisy time, and those quiet
silence myself. Shortly after graduation, I went on a trip with
moments were a gift. It was only 10 minutes, but in those
a group of close friends. One of my sharpest memories of
10 minutes, we could hit pause on some of the chaos and
that time is pausing on a hike to hold our own meeting.
reflect on it—or not reflect on it, if that’s what we needed.
Sitting quietly together, the silent woods around us, we
We weren’t always perfectly quiet—I remember
contemplated our changing worlds and the new places
finding ways to communicate with friends across the
we would scatter to in the fall. It was grounding, and it
Meetinghouse, or mornings we’d dissolve into giggle fits,
made me realize how much I would miss being in silence
the bench backs shaking against us—but by and large, the
with others. In the years that followed, I sought out similar
silence in the room held. What was powerful wasn’t the
opportunities, and silence remained an important part of
silence alone, of course. It’s that we were in silence together.
my life.
And it was out of that communal silence that students often felt comfortable being vulnerable, standing up to break the 50 Summer 2021 | Meetinghouse
As a writer, silence is something I rely on. I often think about a story we discussed in Christina Moustakis’s class—
