Humanist funerals and memorials are non-religious ceremonies which focus on the person who has died, the life they led, and the relationships they forged. They are based on the humanist perspective that every life is valuable and unique.
Humanist funerals and memorial ceremonies are conducted by our trained and accredited celebrants.
FIND YOUR LOCAL CELEBRANT
Michael Conlon 07494 505033
Joan Davis 07546 954222
Ian Deboys 07368 440040
Máire De Buitléar 07841 860276
Terri Gilleece 07801418492
Avril Hawthorne 07854 436914
Stewart Holden 07971 634098
Janni Knox 07890 861690
humanists.uk/ce remonies
Richard Lavery 07802 839543
Michael McAlinden 07305 892201
Mar yLou McShane 07962 906236
Trevor Molloy 07549 946622
Rachel Smith 07957 474643
Declan Walsh 07859 816585
Lisa Wilkinson 07759 514139
The magazine for Funeral Directors in Ireland
Big turnout at the NFE 60
Hairstyling at PEAI training workshop 53
DUBLIN’S NEWEST CEMETERY
Within Esker Lawn Cemetery we have numerous options from which to choose: from traditional burial plots; ash burial or interment plots; to columbarium walls, all of which can be purchased in advance of need.
Within Esker Lawn Cemetery we have numerous options from which to choose: from traditional burial plots; ash burial or interment plots; to columbarium walls, all of which can be purchased in advance of need.
Within Esker Lawn Cemetery we have numerous options from which to choose: from traditional burial plots; ash burial or interment plots; to columbarium walls, all of which can be purchased in advance of need.
NEWEST CEMETERY
Within Esker Lawn Cemetery we have numerous options from which to choose: from traditional burial plots; ash burial or interment plots; to columbarium walls, all of which can be purchased in advance of need.
Great attention to detail has been paid by our craftsmen to create an environment in which family members can visit and reflect, while enjoying the tranquility offered by the manicured natural surroundings.
www.EskerLawnCemetery.com numerous options from plots; ash burial or of which can be our craftsmen to members can visit offered by the service at time families are made seating for
Great attention to detail has been paid by our craftsmen to create an environment in which family members can visit and reflect, while enjoying the tranquility offered by the manicured natural surroundings.
Great attention to detail has been paid by our craftsmen to create an environment in which family members can visit and reflect, while enjoying the tranquility offered by the manicured natural surroundings.
Great attention to detail has been paid by our craftsmen to create an environment in which family members can visit and reflect, while enjoying the tranquility offered by the manicured natural surroundings.
Esker Lawn Cemetery offers a bespoke service at time of burial. In order to ensure grieving families are made comfortable at the graveside, we provide seating for immediate family together with a canopy and plot dressing, which includes the removal of visible soil from the graveside.
Esker Lawn Cemetery offers a bespoke service at time of burial. In order to ensure grieving families are made comfortable at the graveside, we provide seating for immediate family together with a canopy and plot dressing, which includes the removal of visible soil from the graveside.
Esker Lawn Cemetery offers a bespoke service at time of burial. In order to ensure grieving families are made comfortable at the graveside, we provide seating for immediate family together with a canopy and plot dressing, which includes the removal of visible soil from the graveside.
A LIMITED NUMBER OF BURIAL PLOTS AND ASH INTERMENT OPTIONS ARE AVAILABLE TO PRE-PURCHASE IN ADVANCE OF NEED
A LIMITED NUMBER OF BURIAL PLOTS AND ASH INTERMENT OPTIONS ARE AVAILABLE TO PRE-PURCHASE IN ADVANCE OF NEED
A LIMITED NUMBER OF BURIAL PLOTS AND ASH INTERMENT OPTIONS ARE AVAILABLE TO PRE-PURCHASE IN ADVANCE OF NEED
A LIMITED NUMBER OF BURIAL PLOTS AND ASH INTERMENT OPTIONS ARE AVAILABLE TO PRE-PURCHASE IN ADVANCE OF NEED
www.EskerLawnCemetery.com
Esker Lawn Cemetery offers a bespoke service at time of burial. In order to ensure grieving families are made comfortable at the graveside, we provide seating for immediate family together with a canopy and plot dressing, which includes the removal of visible soil from the graveside. www.EskerLawnCemetery.com
Gerard Campbell - GM Canopies
Funeral directors throughout Ireland were shocked and saddened by the recent death of Gerard Campbell who was well known by many through his GM Canopies business. The Co. Tyrone man passed away peacefully at home in May.
All at Funeral Times knew Gerard over many years as a long time contributor and supporter of the magazine and we got to know him at the Funeral Times Trade Shows. Gerard was a popular and well respected figure in the industry and we wish to pass on to his wife Máire and family our deepest sympathies. Those who knew Gerard will remember him as a capable and knowledgeable businessman who worked hard to serve his clients, but especially as a gentleman.
GM Canopies continues to trade and will be happy to meet the needs of it’s many customers.
Padraic Cawley
Civil Funeral Celebrant
Celebrating the life of the deceased, reflecting their personal beliefs, wishes, values and traditions.
Millhill add to their product list
Set deep in the spectacular countryside of County Tyrone, Millhill Wholesale continues to go from strength to strength, expanding both their customer base and range of offerings, without compromising on the quality and detail that goes into each and every product. They have recently added to their catalogue of products, so as well as offering a wide range of coffin and casket designs,
they also now supply Grave Crosses, Grave Spikes and Urns for Ashes. Included in their wide array of religious themed coffins, they are proud to present the beautifully detailed Last Supper, Lady of Knock and Lady of Lourdes offerings, available in all sizes. Millhill’s dedication to their customers is at the forefront of everything they do, so keep an eye out for new, innovative designs.
Grave Spike Urn for Ashes Panel side
IAFD News
A message from Niall Mulligan, IAFD President
Recommendation for the IAFD Funeral Directing Certificate Award (FDCA) 2024
One of the significant benefits of being an IAFD member is exclusive access to our comprehensive education programme, FDCA. This programme is designed to enhance professional development and ensure IAFD Members remain at the forefront of the funeral directing profession. The upcoming FDCA is a prime example of our commitment to continuous improvement and success for Members.
I am pleased to announce the commencement of the IAFD FDCA 2024, scheduled to begin in late September 2024. This course has proven to be highly successful in elevating the quality of service our Members provide to their clients. Additionally, it equips our Members with the essential knowledge and skills needed to run a more efficient business in a safe and positive working environment.
If you are a Member and are interested in taking part in the course please contact
Niamh Sweeney at education@iafd.ie Alternatively, if you are not a Member but feel you could benefit from participating in IAFD education programme and would like to talk to us about becoming a member of IAFD please contact Fintan Cooney at membership@iafd.ie
The benefits of an education in funeral services by Niamh Sweeney, IAFD Education Officer
Completing an education programme in funeral services offers numerous advantages, preparing individuals for a successful career in this essential field. The comprehensive curriculum not only addresses the technical and operational aspects of the profession but also explores the emotional and practical skills necessary to support grieving families with dignity and compassion.
Unit 1 of the FDCA Education Programme covers every aspect of arranging and conducting
a funeral. From the initial call to the final account settlement, each detail is thoroughly addressed. This unit underscores the meticulous attention to detail and sensitivity required in managing one of life’s most delicate experiences. There is also a focus on the importance of empathy and understanding in customer care.
The focus in Unit 2 shifts towards the business side of funeral services. It teaches students how to convey costs to customers, understand
IAFD News
the sources of these costs, and ensure their business remains cost-effective. This dual focus on practical and business skills ensures that graduates are well-rounded and equipped for the complexities of running a funeral home. In this part of the course there is time to consider our increasingly diverse society. As traditions change it is crucial to consider factors such as relationships, gender preferences, and ethnicity. This comprehensive approach ensures that funeral service professionals can meet the needs of all clients.
FDCA is a valuable asset for those looking to advance in funeral services. Participants from larger businesses often specialise in areas such as embalming or funeral arranging. FDCA covers every aspect of the business, providing participants with a vast array of knowledge and skills that support ongoing professional development.
The programme provides the opportunity to engage with peers from across the funeral
sector and is one of the most enjoyable aspects of the course. As a relatively small and insular profession, the chance to share common interests and experiences is highly valued. The course offers opportunities for discussion, both in whole-class settings and smaller group interactions. These exchanges allow students to share ideas and opinions, often leading to
the adoption of fresh ideas inspired by their classmates’ experiences.
In summary, an education in funeral services is not just about learning the technicalities of the profession. It’s about developing an understanding of the emotional and practical aspects of supporting families through one of the most challenging times in their lives.
It’s about gaining comprehensive business knowledge to ensure the sustainability of a funeral home. And it’s about building a network of peers who share a dedication to providing compassionate and professional care. This holistic approach prepares individuals for a rewarding and impactful career in the funeral industry.
IAFD Contacts
Niall Mulligan (President)
Heffernan’s Funeral Directors
Trim, Co. Meath
Mobile: 086 8208501
Ph: 046 9438662
Email: president@iafd.ie
Niamh Sweeney (First Vice President and Education Officer)
John Sweeney and Sons Fairgreen
Arklow, Co Wicklow
Ph: 0402 32333
Email: education@iafd.ie
Paul Reilly (Hon. Secretary)
Oliver Reilly Ltd Funeral Directors
Leinster Street, Maynooth
Ph: 045-868230
Email: info@reillysfuneralhome.ie
Pat Smyth (Hon. Treasurer)
Smyth’s Funeral Directors
Lanesboro Street, Roscommon Ph: 0906 626122
Email: treasurer@iafd.ie
Fintan Cooney (Membership Officer)
Fanagans 54 Aungier Street
Dublin 2
Ph: 01 4167700
Email: membership@iafd.ie
John Mark Griffin (Public Relations Officer)
Griffin Funerals
John’s Gate Pennywell Limerick
Ph: 061 415000
Email: pro@iafd.ie
Tom Lawless (Immediate Past President)
Lawless Funeral Directors
Mucklagh, Tullamore, Co. Offaly
Ph: 057 9322622
Email: info@tullamorefunerals.ie
Dara Gillespie
Finlays Funeral Service
Tierney Street Ardee, Co. Louth
Mobile: 086 7923472
Email: dara.gillespie@finlaygrp.com
Donal Forde
Fordes Funeral Homes Ltd
South Gate Bridge Cork, Co. Cork Ph: 021 4318222
Email: donal@fordesfuneralhome.ie
Kylie Gourley
Funeral Partners Northern Ireland
300 Newtownards Road
Belfast
BT4 1HF
Ph: 028 9045 1021
Email: kylie.gourley@funeralpartners.com
Peter Maguire
Massey Bros
Crumlin Road, Dublin
Ph: 01 4541666
Email: peter@masseybros.com
PICTURE FRAME HOLDER
• STAINLESS STEEL
• FULLY ADJUSTABLE
• FITS ANY PLATE
• CAN BE USED AT REAR OR SIDE
CEMETERY TROLLEY
• 8” CASTORS ALL BRAKED
• ALL MIRROR STAINLESS POLISHED
• SIDE HANDLES WITH RUBBER GRIPS
• CAN BE USED AT REAR OR SIDE
Northern Ireland Funeral Awards
The inaugural Northern Ireland Funeral Awards celebrated excellence in the funeral industry, honouring professionals and businesses across the region for their exceptional contributions to funeral service.
The gala ball was held on Friday 24th May in the Crowne Plaza Hotel, Belfast, aimed to recognise the dedication, compassion and innovation of those in the funeral sector. Categories included Funeral Director of the
Year, Funeral Planner of the Year and a Special Recognition Award. There was also a catering section and florist section as well. Funds were raised on the night for Cruse Bereavement.
Bridget Mone and guests
Ken Gilmore - Winner - Life Time of Service Award
Browns Fuenral Directors of Limavady
Gillian Woolley - Receptionist of the Year
Mr and Mrs Ian Fee
Angelo Kane receving his award
Stephen McCosh receiving his trophy
The Gribbin girls - Winner - Funeral Musician of the Year
Farmhouse Treats - Winner - Outside Caterer of the Year
Eimer Duffy and guest Glenanne Carriages
Some
of the winners included:
Marcus Madill
Independent Funeral Director of the Year
County L’Derry, County Fermanagh & County
Armagh
Sponsored by: Finlays of Ardee
Gilmore Funeral Directors
Independent Funeral Director of the Year
County Antrim & County Down
Sponsored by: Finlays of Ardee
Gillian Woolley
Receptionist of the Year
S&J Irvine Funeral Directors
Sponsored by: Motorcycle Funerals
Bridget Mone
Embalmer of the Year
Mone Funeral Directors
Sponsored by: Shepherd’s Funeral Supplies
Marcus Madill Funeral Directors
Limavady Stone Masons
Everyone enjoying the celebrations
A big congratulations to all the winners and everyone who was nominated on the night!
Ambrose McSparron and Sons, Carnlough
Willie John O’Donnell - Doscard, WinnerMemorial Keepsake
Floral Creations, Comber receiving their trophy
Liz Kelly, L&M Carriages with Marina Galway
Deborah O’Dwyer
Funeral Director enjoying new role as part of Funeral Partners network
An experienced Funeral Director says he is delighted to be spending more time using his skills and knowledge after joining a large, multisite, funeral services business.
Stephen Love, 45, has worked in funerals since he left school, being inspired by the career his aunt had forged caring for people in the industry herself.
He eventually went on to open up his own funeral home along with his business partner, working there together for 13 years before deciding to move on to do something different in the property field combined with occasional work at his former home.
Stephen saw an opportunity and applied for a Funeral Director role at James Brown & Sons Funeral Directors, based in Belfast earlier this year and was successful in his application.
Since then, he has thrived while working at the historic business, which is part of the high-quality network of Funeral Partners homes.
Stephen said he was enjoying the role and the chance to focus on conducting and arranging funerals for the families.
“Funeral services are all I have ever known – it has very much become my vocation,” he said.
“In this new position, I can focus on the job itself. I’m grateful not having to worry
Stephen Love, James Brown & Sons Funeral Directors
about things which aren’t my speciality like marketing, payroll and everything else you have to consider when running your own small business.
“What I can do is help families going through a difficult time and ensure the final goodbyes for their families are exactly right.”
Stephen said he was delighted to be working for Funeral Partners, and that there were huge pluses to working for a large company.
“There are lots of benefits, and I tell my manager on a regular basis that I am really happy and grateful they’ve employed me,” he said.
“James Brown and Sons has always had a great reputation,
and it is really good to be a part of that.
“There are things in place which are different to when you work for an independent, but I understood quickly why.
“For example, the Record of Care Card is an example of a good policy which allows families to be sure their loved ones are being cared for with the utmost respect.
“Every time somebody tends to the deceased in any way it is logged and documented accurately and immediately.
Emma Moore, Branch Development Manager at Funeral Partners said: “It has been fantastic to have Stephen join our team.
“We want people with all sorts of different experiences and all walks of life, but having somebody with so many years in the funeral industry has been great for us. Stephen has embraced his new role, is supporting the team and doing a wonderful job conducting for our families.
“If you’re looking for a new challenge, then please get in touch with us to see what we can offer.”
For more information visit: https://corporate. funeralpartners.co.uk/careers/
Your reputation is our reputation.
Over 100 family businesses and growing
Be part of our story
Selling is one of the biggest decisions that you will ever make for your build your business, so we understand there is a lot to consider, let us assure you, you will be in safe hands.
I feel it’s a very positive step because Funeral Partners share our core values, they understand that the families we work with are the foundation of all funeral businesses.
Jon Baird, Bairds of Antrim Funeral Directors
For an informal conversation about selling your business now, or in the future, call:
970 531 07834 531822
Steve Wilkinson, Acquisition & Mergers Director 07528
Eimer Duffy is a Social Media Consultant and Trainer at FIT Social Media. Through bespoke solutions, Eimer helps Funeral Professionals gain a better online presence, build communities and trust online with zero stress and hassle in a short space of time. She also co-hosts The Let’s Get Social Show and you can catch that on all the major podcast channels such as Spotify etc... And for more information on what Eimer provides go to www.fitsocialmedia.co.uk
What are the best social media platforms for Funeral Directors to use?
At NFE24 I was giving a CPD session and asked, “who was on social media?” Everyone’s hands went up. No surprise there then. Just shows that social media is a powerful tool: You can reach a broader audience. The place to share valuable information. And where you can engage with local and global communities. So, with that in mind, what are the best social media platforms to be on? What are the benefits for you personally and for your funeral home or business? And how can you use them more effectively? Here are some pointers on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and yes the dreaded TikTok:
Facebook: Building Community Connections
Facebook is a versatile platform. It can help you connect with your community on a personal level. With its vast user base, it’s a great place to share information and build relationships.
Benefits:
• For Community Engagement: Share articles, grief support resources etc. and educational information.
• Targeted Advertising: Use Facebook’s advertising tools to reach specific demographics. So you ensure your services are seen by those who need them most.
• Event Promotion: Promote memorial services and open days. Share community support meetings to increase attendance and awareness.
• Customer Reviews: Positive reviews can boost your reputation and reassure potential clients.
How to Use Facebook Effectively:
• Create a Professional Page: Make sure your business page is complete. Have accurate contact information, all your service details
and appealing visuals.
• Post Regularly: Keep your audience engaged by sharing a mix of content. Include articles, videos, podcasts, event updates and testimonials.
• Engage with Followers: Respond promptly to comments and messages to foster a sense of community and trust.
• Use Facebook Ads: Use targeted ads to reach specific groups who might benefit from your services.
Instagram: Showcasing Your Services
Instagram is a visual platform. Makes it perfect for showcasing the compassionate and professional services you provide.
Benefits:
• Visual Storytelling: Share images and videos of your facilities. As well as events and community involvement to give a personal touch to your services.
• Engagement Through Stories: Use Instagram Stories to provide behind-the-scenes looks at your work. Share testimonials or offer tips on grief and remembrance.
• Hashtags for Reach: Use relevant hashtags to increase the visibility of your posts. Widening your reach to attract followers interested in your services.
• Inspirational Content: Share comforting quotes and messages to support those who are grieving.
How to Use Instagram Effectively:
• High-Quality Images: Post high-quality photos. So you can reflect the professionalism and care of your services.
• Use Stories and Reels: Engage your audience with short, engaging videos and stories. So you can provide insights and helpful information.
• Consistency is Key: Regularly update your feed and stories to maintain a strong presence.
• Interact with Followers: Respond to comments and direct messages to build relationships and trust.
LinkedIn: Professional Networking
LinkedIn is the perfect platform for professional networking. This will help you build valuable connections within the funeral industry. See it as your eco-friendly business card.
Benefits:
• Industry Connections: Connect with other professionals in the funeral industry. And share insights, advice and best practices.
• Thought Leadership: Publish articles and posts to establish yourself as a thought leader in the field of funeral services.
• Business Development: Use LinkedIn to connect with potential partners. As well as suppliers and other businesses that can support and enhance your services.
• Job Listings: Post job openings and find qualified candidates to join your team.
How to Use LinkedIn Effectively:
• Complete Your Profile: Make sure your business profile is comprehensive. And that it includes relevant details about your mission and services.
• Share Articles and Insights: Post articles and updates that reflect your expertise and commitment to the industry.
• Join Relevant Groups: Participate in LinkedIn groups related to the funeral industry to network and share knowledge.
• Engage with Your Network: Comment on and share posts from your connections to stay active and visible within your professional community.
TikTok: Reaching a Wider Audience/Future Employees
• TikTok might seem unconventional, but it offers a unique way to connect with a wider audience through creative content.
Benefits:
• Educational Content: Create short, informative videos that educate viewers about the funeral process, grief support, and the importance of end-of-life planning.
• Behind-the-Scenes: Share behind-the-scenes looks at your work to demystify the funeral process and build trust with your audience.
• Viral Potential: TikTok’s algorithm can help your content reach that wider audience quickly, increasing awareness of your services.
• Engagement and Interaction: Use TikTok to interact with followers through comments and direct messages, creating a sense of community and accessibility.
How to Use TikTok Effectively:
• Create Short, Engaging Videos: Focus on concise and engaging content that can capture attention quickly.
• Use Popular Hashtags: Incorporate trending hashtags to increase the visibility of your videos.
• Be Authentic: Show the human side of your business to connect emotionally with viewers.
• Engage with Followers: Respond to comments and create content based on follower feedback to build a loyal community.
All in all,
By using a mix of these social media platforms, you can create a balanced and effective online presence. Each platform offers unique benefits, helping you connect with your local and global community, showcase your services, and build professional networks. Embracing social media enhances your visibility and strengthens your ability to support and engage with families in meaningful ways. It’s a great time now for your funeral home/business to stand out online, grow and thrive by fully leveraging the power of social media.
As you consider updating your knowledge. This summer, why not take the opportunity to explore these platforms. And discover how they can benefit your business. Want to have a chat about it or what about booking a free online video audit of your current online presence, then do get in touch with me, Eimer. Visit www.fitsocialmedia.co.uk for more information. And you can email me at eimer@fitsocialmedia.co.uk.
Thanks for reading, Eimer.
If you have any more questions, send them into Eimer and she will answer them for you, and we will publish them in our next edition. All questions submitted and published can be anonymous if you wish. You can contact Eimer by email at: eimer@fitsocialmedia.co.uk
Mourningcross Bereavement Pins: A touching tradition for wakes and funerals
In the delicate and solemn environment of wakes and funerals, identifying immediate family members can be both challenging and crucial. To address this need, Mourningcross bereavement pins continue to provide pins to families and directors as a heartfelt and practical solution. These pins serve not only as symbols of grief but also as beacons of support, helping visitors recognise those who are closest to the departed and worn as an outward expression of mourning after the wake and funeral.
Due to the continuous demand and recommendations
from those who have used them, Mourningcross has made a slight yet significant adjustment to their pins. The pins are now slightly smaller, making them more discreet while maintaining their distinctive design and emotional significance. This change was inspired by feedback from the community, who appreciated the pins’ purpose but desired a more understated appearance. Despite this modification, the pins continue to be available, preserving their original intent and quality. They are crafted to offer solace and unity, bridging the gap between mourners and visitors. Every
detail of the Mourningcross pin is designed to honour the memory of the departed while providing a gentle nudge of recognition to those who need it most.
In moments of sorrow, small gestures can make a world of difference. Mourningcross bereavement pins embody this truth, offering a meaningful way to identify and support immediate family members at wakes and funerals. As they continue to adapt to the needs of their wearers, these pins remain a cherished part of the mourning process, bringing a touch of grace and understanding to those who grieve.
Michael Clarke, Foxford Co. Mayo collected his new Passat from Quinn Hearse and Limousine
Embracing Diversity in Times of Grief: Bilingual Funeral Ceremonies with Entheos
In a touching tribute to a beloved Polish mother and grandmother, Entheos Ireland recently held a bilingual funeral ceremony at Mount Jerome, in collaboration with our colleagues in Massey Bros. Led by Entheos Director Karen Dempsey and her Entheos colleague Maria Connaughton, a native Polish speaker, the ceremony highlighted the value of linguistic and cultural sensitivity in holding a ceremony where everyone understands the words and meanings, and feels included. This accessibility is a core value of ours within Entheos, particularly for families navigating times of grief.
Entheos is proud to have Celebrants throughout Ireland who are fluent in Gaeilge/ Irish, Polish, Portuguese, Bulgarian, Assamese, Bengali, Hindi, German, French and Spanishand we are growing in diversity all the time. This
Karen Dempsey and her colleague Maria Connaughton
inclusive approach ensures that every family can find a Celebrant who understands and respects their traditions and values. Our training programme focusses on supporting families during times of grief, trauma and high emotion, and we know that easing language and cultural differences provides enormous comfort to families during their time of great loss.
The bilingual ceremony at Mount Jerome exemplified how embracing cultural diversity can provide such comfort and continuity in a time of grief. Conducting the funeral in both English and Polish was an important recognition of the deceased’s heritage and the family’s need to grieve in their native language. Maria’s linguistic expertise alongside Karen in the ceremony ensured that all names and pronunciations were accurate, and that the ceremony felt deeply meaningful for all
SPECIALIST CLEANING SERVICES
FOR AFTER A DEATH
A death cleaner, often re ferred to as a crime scene cleaner or biohazard remediation specialist, is a professional responsible for cleaning and decontaminating spaces where traumatic events, such as accidents, violent crimes, suicides, or unattended/sudden deaths, have occurred.
Our primar y duties include:
Biohazard Cleanup
Cleaning and decontaminating areas contaminated with blood, diseases and ensure safety.
Removal of Biohazardous Materials
Disposing of items like blood-soaked materials, furniture, and other contaminated objec ts following strict protocols and regulations.
Odour Control
Eliminating unpleasant odors that may linger after such incidents, often using specialized equipment and techniques including Ozone machines.
Decontamination they are safe for future use.
Restoration
Repairing or replacing items and structures that may have been damaged during the incident or the cleanup process.
Emotional Support
during a challenging and emotional time.
Alana Gillen
attendees, underscoring Entheos’s commitment to culturally sensitive services.
Entheos Ireland’s mission aligns with that of our Funeral Director colleagues in that we share the desire to serve every family as best we can, depending on their individual needs and requirements. We strive to provide ceremonies that are not just read from a script, but that authentically reflect people in their unique lives. By expanding our team with Celebrants from various backgrounds, we reaffirm our commitment to empathy, inclusivity, and the celebration of diverse legacies.
We have Celebrants located throughout Ireland North and South, and we are keen to meet with our Funeral Director colleagues to see how we can best serve the growing need for non-traditional Funeral Ceremonies. Please note that we are an inclusive, non-denominational organisation so we can incorporate aspects of faith paths if requested by the family, and the majority of our ceremonies contain no religious elements at all.
Our team at Entheos are highly experienced
and have had the privilege of holding funerals for all kinds of people from all walks of life, who have died in so many different ways. We specialise in holding funerals involving trauma and sudden death, and with the great grief that comes with holding funeral ceremonies for infants, children and young people who have left this life at a young age. We are proud to offer our Died With Pride service, providing funeral ceremonies for LGBTQ+ people, held by LGBTQ+ people. We do not charge for ceremonies for children under 18, or for legal marriage ceremonies held in hospices or hospitals (See Lara’s Legacy and Grá go Deo on our website).
If we can support you in serving a family who seek a non-traditional funeral ceremony, please contact us via our website www. entheos.ie, or phone our administrator Adrieanne on 089 2205008. We would be delighted to tell you more about our organisation, and how we are serving our communities in a new way.
BIE News BIE News
Ireland Division
Ihope everyone is enjoying the start of the summer! We had our second meeting of the year on the 19th May in Glasnevin Cemetery. It was great to catch up with everyone. On behalf of our division I want to say a huge thank you to our National President Rachel Shipley for attending our meeting it was so great to meet you and wish you all the best for the remainder of your term. What a day!!!
We had great weather and two amazing guest speakers, State Pathologist Dr. Sally Anne Collis & Perinatal Pathologist Dr. Peter Kelehan. They both gave us amazing presentations on the work they do which gave us a great insight. A huge thank you to the both of them for giving up their Sunday for our members and students.
Our next meeting will be in October dates and venue to be confirmed. I really want to encourage all our members to attend the meetings. We are trying to our best to provide what our members want and need. All I can say is you’ll never regret coming to a meeting! Having a catch up with other members, meeting all our new students and maybe even learning a
few new tricks of the trade. Nearly every meeting I’ve attended there has always been a time where I’ve either learned something new or even gave a piece of advice. It doesn’t matter if you haven’t attended a meeting in years everyone is welcome and it would be great to have you back.
On a final note, I would appreciate if any members who had their own ideas on what they would like to see at the meetings would email myself or our secretary Jenny. All our details are on the list of officers, remember this is your division - have a say in what we do. We would love to hear from you.
BIE Irish Chairperson Niamh Cusack
BIE News BIE News
The British Institute of Embalmers (BIE) has announced the release of a comprehensive embalming guide aimed at assisting all funeral directors, their clients, and the general public in making informed choices regarding embalming practices. They have generously offered it for use across the entire industry.
Developed by experts in the field, it serves as a reliable resource which provides detailed but sensitive insights into the embalming process, purposes, benefits, and the various methods employed. By addressing common misconceptions and promoting factual information, the BIE aims to demystify embalming while advocating for transparency and informed decision-making within the funeral industry.
This document equips funeral professionals with the knowledge and resources to confidently speak about embalming with their clients effectively, ensuring their clients have the information they need to make choices that are right for them and the person who has died. It can be used to educate your team, given to your clients during a funeral arrangement meeting, and/or given to the public during promotional events to raise awareness. Digital copies are available free of charge and permission to print the document can be requested from the BIE and your company does not need to employ a BIE member to use it.
It has been written with the bereaved in mind and it has been designed to be given to them. Along with information about embalming, it also includes frequently asked questions accompanied by honest but sensitive answers suitable for the bereaved.
The British Institute of Embalmers remains committed to upholding the highest standards of professionalism and ethics in the field of embalming. This guide
stands as a testament to our dedication to education, transparency, and the well-being of all individuals involved in the funeral process. The funeral director is permitted to add their company branding or office stamp to a specific box within the document and it is available in 3 formats for your ease. They are as follows:
• A readable pdf file so you can upload it to you company social media and your website
• 2 x printable versions: Trifold Professional printer guided layout for you to send to an external printers.
• Trifold layout in pdf version for you to print in house.
Alternatively, if you would like to purchase hard copies directly from the BIE, they are available for £35.00/100 copies. This document contains the trademark of The British Institute of Embalmers and is protected under copyright law, so permission must be sought before use.
For more information or to seek permission for use, please contact The BIE using the details below.
The British Institute of Embalmers
Anubis House 21c Station Road Knowle, Solihull West Midlands B93 0HL
Telephone 01564 778991
Email info@bioe.co.uk
Website www.bioe.co.uk
List of BIE Officers and Appointed Representatives for 2024/2025
NI 1st National Council Representative: Laurence O’Neill MBIE 98 Stewartstown Road, Belfast
BT11 9JP
Tel: 028 9062 0099 E: oneill8210@hotmail.com
NI 2nd National Council Representative: Mrs Barbara Fowley, MBIE Killakee, Rockbrook Rathfarnham, Dublin 16 Telephone: 00353 (0)86 1911022 Email: barbarafowley@yahoo.ie
A day of collaboration, meditation, voice work & somatic movements
• Must be fully qualified FC to attend
• Intimate group (only 15 par ticipants)
Simon Marshall MBIE (Trade Embalming Service) new modern embalming facility in Dungannon
Simon Marshall MBIE offers a trade embalming service as part of his father’s funeral business Dereck Marshall and Sons in Dungannon located conveniently to M1 Motorway.
Simon has always been an integral part of the family business having a particular interest in the provision of embalming services. Simon completed his professional qualification both practical and theoretical in 2022 with the international examinations board of Embalmers and is a member of the British Institute of Embalmers and European Association of Embalmers.
Simon believes strongly that the embalming process is very important in providing the best viewing experience for the deceased loved ones and strives to provide this by using new techniques to deliver the best level of dignity and presentation for the deceased. Simon is skilled in restorative techniques which if necessary can ultimately make a huge difference to the viewing experience of relatives and friends. He is also experienced in post mortem reconstruction.
Simon is an advocate for formal qualifications and training in such an important and privileged profession. He trained with internationally renowned embalmers Ray Hood (Bristol) and Cyril Gantley (Mortuary Science Ireland Dublin). Simon works
to
and advances in embalming services.
Simon works closely with his father Dereck who has over 35 years’ experience as a Funeral Director and embalmer. Simon offers his services to the Funeral profession throughout Northern Ireland. He currently provides trade embalming services for a number of local funeral directors and is now in a position to expand his customer base.
Simon is ideally located in the west of the province
Simon Marshall
continually keep up to date with new techniques
Embalming room
convenient to all major hospitals in Belfast. He can provide a half way collection location from Belfast mortuaries.
Services Provided:
• Mobile Embalming service. (Province wide)
• Modern Embalming Room Available.
• Mortuary Collections (Province Wide)
• Straight/Post-Mortem Cases.
• Repatriation Embalming including Certificate.
• 7 day week Service
Simon can be contacted for further information at: Mob: 07563 828660
Email : Sgmarshall@hotmail.co.uk
Web: Dereckmarshallandsons.co.uk
Address: Stangmore Park, 4a Far circular Road, Dungannon, Co. Tyrone BT71 6LW
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It takes a village
By Sean Sweetman
Sean joined Dodge in 2019 as a sales representative in Northern Illinois and Chicagoland. He also serves as an Embalming Laboratory Instructor at Worsham College of Mortuary Science, and has authored a textbook, “Creating Natural Form.” Sean is also the immediate past Chairman of the North American Division of the British Institute of Embalmers.
In my career I have done my share of restorative cases. I wasn’t born with the natural ability to be good at this. I became confident in my abilities after countless hours of simply trying to do my best for the family. Often this meant trying one thing, only to have to undo my hours of work and start over. This was mostly done on my own time and not my employer’s time. Sometimes you succeed and sometimes you come up short. But in every instance, the family was able to say goodbye and have some sort of closure.
For me the easier cases would be where there was trauma and something was missing from the deceased, maybe an eye or an ear or even an entire side of their face. When one side of the face is intact it is pretty easy to just replicate it on the other side. One thing I had to learn early on in my career was that sometimes you need to excise tissue or an abnormality in order to build it back up. Less wax is always better. If you don’t learn to trust yourself and remove tissue, you will need a ton of wax to spread out in order to hide that unwanted elevated tissue. Using that much wax all the time is not practical.
Recently I was called by a local funeral home to consult on an interesting case. The deceased had already been embalmed. I agreed to stop by and have a look to see what could be done. I was shocked at what I saw. I walked into the prep room and immediately asked, “Why is his mouth wide open?”
I was told they were unable to get it closed. I put on some PPE and tried closing the mouth myself. It wouldn’t budge. I was told the gentleman had mouth and throat cancer. It
was the worst I’ve ever seen. The deceased literally had open wounds on his lower face and his mouth was solid with cancerous tissue. The deceased was 70 years old when he died. His name was Barry and he had suffered many health issues over the last 24 years of his life resulting from his cancer. Barry always volunteered for every clinical study available, in the hope of helping himself, but he thought it was just as important for the research in the hope that it might save someone else. Before his passing, Barry made his wishes clear to his family that an open casket was important to him. After hearing about how giving and caring Barry was in his own life, it was impossible to not do everything I could to give his family an open casket.
I started to come up with a game plan. I first looked over the embalming report. He was embalmed with a 5% solution of 21 oz. of Introfiant DC, 21 oz. of Regal, 16 oz. each of Proflow and Rectifiant as co-injections, and 182 oz. of water to make a total solution of two gallons. As I mentioned earlier, he was very well preserved. I was happy to see they had used Regal in their mixture. I love Regal because it has a high index of 30, yet it is a humectant chemical. This would allow me to work well with the tissue.
I started out by running the numbers,doing the math, and taking measurements. This was achieved by the basic supplemental equalities measurements, as well as the vertical measurements of the face. It was immediately clear to me that from his line of lip closure down would need extreme restoration. I then took my measurements from a known facial
feature, in this case, it was Barry’s nose. For accuracy, I measured his nose in millimeters. I then measured Barry’s nose in the photograph. I then divided the real measurement from the photo measurement, giving us our scale number. This is an amazing tool to utilize because now I can measure anything that needs to be restored from the picture and multiply it by the scale number to acquire the correct measurement it should be on his face. This could be an ear length or the distance from the base of his nose to his upper lip, and so on. Often I will search the deceased’s social media accounts for either a primary picture or additional pictures to aid me in the process.
I had enough measurements to get started, but truth be told, I was very nervous. I am used to building up tissue and features where there had been none. But this was a unique situation whereby all calculations I would be removing this man’s tissue including everything south of his line of lip closure. It was at that moment it all became real. The reality of removing so much of what was already there scared me. It’s not like I can just say, “Sorry, I tried,” and then remove the Wound Filler and wax and give him back the way I found him. I just stood there for a minute and thought to myself, there will be no turning back.
So I did So I did what every smart embalmer would do and I phoned a friend. I wanted a second opinion, or to be more precise, I wanted this friend to tell me, “Absolutely, 100 percent, your plan is spot on, that’s exactly what I would do.” Well, I am a very fortunate embalmer because that friend that I will call from time to time for advice and guidance is none other than my mentor and predecessor, Jack Adams. I safely transferred a couple of photos to Jack and he confirmed that my game
plan was spot on. But those of you who know Jack and know his love for our profession and the art of postmortem surgery, will know that simply looking at a couple of photos wouldn’t be enough. Jack quickly said, “Do you mind if I come by?” I calmly said, “Yeah, that would be fine.” But inside I was jumping up and down and elated with joy. I knew what would have taken me twelve hours was now going to take five hours.
Knowing Jack was going to be helping me gave me new energy and confidence. While I waited for him, I started to prep the tissue inside the mouth using Basic Dryene as a cauterant. When Jack arrived, we started excising the necrotic, cancerous tissue using scalpels, and then reapplied Basic Dryene packs to cauterize our fresh tissue from our incisions. The next step was to create a foundation on which we could build. We achieved this by using a #7 ligature and creating a basket weave stitch back and forth between viable tissue. This would give our Wound Filler something to grab onto and secure itself. Then strips of Webril were carefully woven in between the basket weave structure and Pore Closer was applied to the strips of Webril. Once dry, this creates a cement-like base on which to work. I then did some basic measurements to see if we were close and we were good. It was time to apply the Surface Restorer. Normally this is where more precise measurements would take place. But again, anyone who has ever worked with Jack knows you better keep up with him. So we winged it and I measured later and, sure enough, it was pretty darn close. Jack worked on the right side while I worked on the left side.
The groundwork was laid and I now felt confident that I was going to be able to keep my promise to the family. While Jack worked on
raising the eyes to the desired height I worked on creating the lines of natural demarcation. This was achieved with different instruments. I used the reverse side of a straight aneurysm hook to press down gently to create his nasolabial folds. We also were able to use a spatula to create a line of closure for the lips as well as creating his labiomental sulcus and his mental eminence. Dry Wash II was then used to gently manipulate and soften the ridges of our work. We applied the Dry Wash II by both tapping with a brush, as well as using my gloved hand, dipping it in Dry Wash II and applying. Stepping back and checking our work from different angles, I was extremely satisfied. I thanked Jack for all his help, I truly would have been taking naps in my car in between sessions if it were not for him. We were done for the day. Barry’s visitation/wake wasn’t for two more days so I had some time in which to deal with his cosmetics. The big thing left to do was the restoration of his mustache. There was no getting around the mustache. In every picture I saw of Barry he had a full, perfect mustache. However, the cancer had taken most of his mustache and he only had a few straggler hairs left. I decided to deal with his mustache the following day.
I woke up the following morning and the first thing in my thoughts was Barry’s mustache. I had never been great with hair restoration. I have spent countless hours trying. I’m certain I am not the only one who has tried to cut some hair from the back of the head and carefully build a mustache into wax. Well, I usually screw it up and have wax and hair everywhere and have to start over. I headed out the door to visit my customers for the day and I was going to deal with the mustache after visiting my final customer for the day.
As luck would have it, I stopped by the funeral home where a well-respected embalmer named
Bob Chapelle worked. While visiting with Bob, I told him of my dilemma of having to restore a mustache later that evening. Bob said, “No big deal. l just go to the Chicago Costume shop on Fullerton.” Then he said, “Wait, I have a bunch in the prep room if you want to take a look.” I borrowed a few mustaches that were the right color and consistency and made my way to the funeral home later in the day to work on Barry’s mustache. After some minor trimming, I used a few dabs of Lip Tite (rubber cement) to attach the mustache. It was a home run. It looked so real. We used Kalon Cream cosmetics and th Dinair airbrush as well. I was super satisfied with the final results.
The following day (the day before the visitation) I went back to the funeral home to double check everything because the trade service was going to be dressing and casketing him that day. I wanted to take some final pictures. The family was happy to sign a waiver and release allowing me to use these photos for future programs. The funeral director told me the family was over the moon and extremely pleased. This made Jack and me very happy. What I really want to get across in this article is that no matter how long you or I have been doing this trade that we love so much, it is okay to ask for help or advice. This case started with the initial funeral home calling a reputable trade service to do the embalming. Then that trade service recommended that they call me to do the restoration because it wasn’t something they were comfortable doing. Then I called Jack for guidance and help. Then I got Bob’s advice with the mustache. My point is, sometimes we need to put our pride and egos aside and ask for help. With a lot of teamwork and collaboration we were able to give Barry’s family and friends a meaningful, traditional funeral with an open casket. Sometimes it takes a village to get things done. If you would like to be added to the mailing list for the complementary Dodge Magazine which is printed quarterly or would like to discuss any of the products mentioned in this article, please contact us on the number below: Shepherds Funeral Supplies, Unit 2A Royal Canal Business Park, Athlone Road, Co. Longford. Ph. 00353 43 33 49702/ 00353 87 2486668
Saif NewS Saif NewS SAIF Standards
By Claire Day, SAIF Administration Manager
In
June 2023, SAIF
became approved by the Chartered Trading Standards Institute (CTSI) as an alternative dispute resolution (ADR) body, this means that the service that SAIF provides in relation to its complaints process has been checked and approved for its independence, quality and accessibility.
What did this mean for our members?
It meant that the Society met the stringent criteria needed to resolve disputes between parties out of court, giving members and their clients the confidence that disagreements over complaints will be handled professionally and fairly.
Members were requested to update their complaints procedure documentation to reference SAIF as the relevant ADR body.
Is there anything that SAIF has to do to maintain as an ADR body?
As part of the duties on an annual basis which will be in June this year, SAIF will be required to publish on our website annual report covering the complaints that have been received for the preceding year.
Every 2 years a separate report has to be provided to the CTSI.
What should a complaints policy do:
• State why your business welcomes complaints, listing the benefits to customers, staff and the business.
• State who the policy covers and who is authorised to resolve complaints.
• Define a complaint.
• Commit to quick, fair and confidential complaint handling.
• State who is responsible for taking, recording, resolving, analysing and reporting on complaints.
• Explain how to log complaints.
• Explain the complaint procedure and what to do about complaints.
• Set timelines for complaint handling and keeping customers informed.
• List acceptable ways to resolve complaints.
• Explain what will happen to the complaint if it cannot be resolved.
• Be reviewed regularly for effectiveness and updated.
• State where people can get further help.
Are there any other resources available?
There is a webinar hosted by Philip Le Shirley, Senior Trading Standards Specialist and SAIF’s contact at Buckinghamshire & Surrey Trading Standards, which is available on the members area of the SAIF website which also provides useful advice about diffusing customer complaints.
As part of SAIF’s partnership with the Primary Authority we are also looking to produce another assured piece of work for our members in a complaints policy and complaints form, which will be released in due course and once again adds that additional protection for our members and their families.
Focus on what you do best.
While SAIF promotes and protects your independent interests.
We know how much you value your independence.
The funeral industry may have changed but our passion for supporting our members has remained the same. We represent you on the issues that matter, from improving understanding of funeral pricing to influencing the legislation which a ects your future Let us take care of the big picture so you can focus locally on what you do best.
For over 30 years SAIF has been promoting and protecting the interests and values of independent funeral directors. Supporting our members is at the heart of everything we do, listening, responding and engaging to secure your independent future.
Visit saif.org.uk or call us on 0345 230 6777 or 01279 726777
Through our own personal experience we received the inspiration to set up Treasured Keepsakes, to give people a wide variety of options upon a loved one’s passing should they choose to keep a lock of hair, cremated remains, a piece of jewellery, a photograph or anything that is a personal reminder of their loved one in a small keepsake, keepsake pendant or urn.
Funeral directors we are currently working with have tailored our service to suit their needs. We have two options of how our service can work for you. If you wish you can buy our products from us at a wholesale price and sell them directly to your clients. Alternatively we can offer this service to your clients directly.
We would hope that by recommending our service we will enhance and add value to your business at no extra cost to you.
For more information contact us or visit our website Tel: 01 825 4579 From NI: 00353 1 825 4579 info@treasuredkeepsakes.ie www.treasuredkeepsakes.ie
Celebrant of the Year
At the recent Funeral Awards Northern Ireland, held in Belfast in May, our regular contributor, Ian Fee won the award for Celebrant of the Year.
“I really appreciated seeing the celebrant’s role being acknowledged in these Funeral Awards as it’s a relatively new element to the funeral services industry in Northern Ireland, but more and more people are looking for something very personal and meaningful as they celebrate their loved one’s life and memory. Everyone has the right to live life their way, with all the diversity and uniqueness life can offer, so their end-of-life ritual should be able to reflect this. The award is certainly a recognition of this, but the real honour is the trust that is placed in me as the celebrant, as with the funeral director, to help the family say farewell and to be a part of such a significant and emotional gathering.”
PEAI News PEAI News...
Summertime is upon us, and I hope everyone is looking forward to some kind of a break.
I would like to thank the members of the PEAI for their continued support, also thank you to our past Chairpersons, without them the association would not be as strong as it is today, and we are proud of the fact we are the only Embalming Association recognised by IFTA.
We strive to provide support and additional training to all our members, which comprise of accredited full member and student members. Following on from
our last training workshop titled: The Art of restoration & reconstruction in 2023, We have had our first training workshop in 2024 titled: Master Class in Hair & Make up, which was a
fantastic experience. Everyone knows there is always something new to learn regardless of the length of time working in the afterlife care industry and attending events aid in confidence seeing new techniques & experiencing new products which are to help aid in achieving exceptional presentation skills.
I would like to give thanks to our members for taking time out from work and students from study to attend our Master Class in Hair & Make up. Membership to our association is available to the certified embalmer,
please visit our web site where a membership application is available to download. https://www. professionalembalmers. ie/become-a-member/ To become a member of the PEAI
(A)You must be a practicing Embalmer.
(B)Provide a copy of your embalming qualification. Please Note: Applicants are expected to meet certain requirements before being accepted into the Association.
PEAI Group shot Workshop
On that note let’s welcome our newest member, Clare Ann Irwin (Galway).
Certified by The Irish College Of Funeral Directing And Embalming. Accredited by the Professional Embalmers Association of Ireland.
PEAI Chairperson Grainne Teefy
Clare Ann Irwin
Gráinne Teefy MPEAI
Mobile: 085-8570029
SECRETARY
Mar tina Burns MPEAI, MEAE
Mobile 086-3845446
Pat
MPEAI, MEAE , MIAFD Mobile: 087-2535519 TREASURER
Michael Grealish MPEAI, MEAE
Mobile: 087-8184283 PRO Joe McNamara MPEAI, MEAE , MIAFD
Mobile 086-2532449
You’ll Never Walk Alone
- By Ian FeeLakelands Funeral Home & Crematorium, Cavan
Iwasordained a priest thirty years ago this year. When I left the seminary in 1994, I couldn’t have imagined the journey I was setting out on and if you’d told me then that this is where I’d be now, married, three step kids, working in a crematorium and living a new ministry as a civil celebrant, well, I would’ve recommended you a good psychiatrist! To say that my journey was unexpected and unconventional is an understatement. Having said that, I wouldn’t change a thing and I look back on my twentythree years as a Catholic priest with great fondness. During those years, I was involved with countless funerals, each one unique. For every funeral of a devout, practising parishioner, there was one for someone who, by their own admission, wasn’t particularly or at all religious. It could often be the case that when arranging the funeral with the family, you had to work with their lack of awareness or understanding of why the arrangements were the way they were, why certain elements that seemed natural to them were not allowed by the Church in the Funeral Mass. It could make for some difficult encounters and I soon found myself having to find that often hard to find line between being compassionate and being firm.
I always believed that there was an opportunity in such moments, though. When a priest speaks to a congregation who is familiar with what we do and why, comfortable with the spirit and meaning of the funeral Mass, a lot can go unsaid. When you’re speaking to a group who is more unfamiliar with how the Church works, with the concept of the parish faith
truth, that in the funeral Mass, as in any religious service or farewell ritual, we are not just marking someone’s passing, but we are seeking to help the bereaved in their new journey, walking with them in solidarity and sympathy.
This is why the funeral ritual is so important. We felt its absence deeply during the covid pandemic, but I think we have to remain vigilant that this most important of traditions is encouraged to continue and develop. There is a reason why traditions become traditions. We have found something, perhaps not always definable, that benefits us, that offers us a comfort and consolation, a balm for our emotional wounds. So much in our world has become dehumanised, from our socialising to our learning to our communication. The human element with all its uncertainties, foibles and idiosyncrasies should be seen as a positive to be embraced in these situations, not as a nuisance to be avoided for while it may be that some people understandably fear grief so they seek to avoid a funeral event that they feel may be too traumatic, for most the funeral will offer a moment that can be therapeutic, even cathartic.
Being involved with a number of truly tragic funerals during my years in ministry, I understood how those moments affected the whole community and by the same measure how the funeral Mass was an equally important moment in the community’s grief and its healing. Funerals, be they in churches, funeral homes or wherever, whether they’re religious or secular, can be a counter-point to the way so much in society is becoming and in that the funeral
Irwin, Galway
door Mercedes from Quinn Hearse and Limousine
NAFD News
NAFD Conference celebrates success and focuses on the future
Not only the long-awaited spring sunshine but even a rare UK display of the Northern Lights shone down on Old Windsor in May, as NAFD members and guests gathered for three days of discussion, education and networking at the NAFD’s Annual General Meeting and Conference 2024 - marking the end of NAFD President Barry Prichard’s year in office.
Addressing the delegates during the opening of Conference, NAFD President Barry Pritchard said:
“We have often said that these events are a chance for members to shape the future of the profession. This year, we meet in the run up to the enforcement of a statutory code and licensing scheme for Funeral Directors in Scotland, ahead of the single largest
change in death certification in two decades – and as government begin the process of considering what the future regulation of the funeral sector will look like in England and Wales.
“Generational change means
NAFD President 2023-24 Barry Pritchard; NAFD Chief Executive Officer Andrew Judd; NAFD First Vice President 2023-24 Jenny GilbertTrigg; NAFD Second Vice President 2023-24 Darryl Smith; NAFD Immediate Past President 2023-24 John Adams
the expectations, preferences and needs of our clients is changing – and how we operate our businesses is changing too. The timing of this meeting could not be more important.”
As well as Association business and education, almost seventy NAFD students were presented with their diplomas during Conference at a special graduation event, during which NAFD Chief Executive Andrew Judd reflected on the opportunity that the event offered to “publicly recognise the skills, appetite for knowledge and sheer determination that NAFD graduates have shown in achieving their qualifications.”
One of the highlights of
NAFD Member Benefits
Bu siness Advice & Suppor t
• Client Will search facility *
• Repatriation Helpline *
• *
• Stationery solutions
Financial
• Fleet breakdown cover *
• Fleet insurance *
• Perfect Choice Funeral Plans *
• £5m professional indemnity insurance *
• NAFD Energy Club
Category A
England, Wales, Nor thern Ireland, Scotland, the Isle of Man and the Channel Islands
Category B
* Category A members only
• NAFD Telecoms
• NAFD Legal Advisory Service
• Counselling helpline for staff/family
• Property Planning Advice
• Health & Safety advice
• PR Handbook and PR Helpline
• Merchant card services
• NAFD Fast Track Debt Recovery Service
Knowledge Shar ing
• Networking opportunities through Area Federation and Local Association meetings
• Conference and Autumn General Meeting
• Member website
• Attendance at National Funeral Exhibition (discount on stand space if exhibiting)
Professional Credibilit y
• Code of Practice and client dispute resolution service, NAFD Resolve *
• Listing on funeral-directory.co.uk *
• Listing on supplier member search on NAFD website
• Use of logos and marketing collateral
• £150k employment claims insurance
• £150k H&S prosecution insurance
• £150k HMRC & VAT investigation insurance
• Personal/commercial insurance discounts
• Royal Mail Same Day Service
• Parliamentary campaigning
• Monthly copy of Funeral Director Monthly
• Discounted advertising in Funeral Director Monthly
• Free editorial in Funeral Director Monthly
• Monthly e-newsletter
• NAFD social media
• Regular e-communication updates on important issues affecting your business
Professional Development
• • Election to NAFD boards/committees
General
• Volvo schemes offering preferential rates *
Category C
Overseas
Category C Benefits
• Discount on stand space if exhibiting at the biennial National Funeral Exhibition
• Discounted advertising in Funeral Director Monthly
• A listing in the overseas member search on the Association’s website
• Monthly copy of Funeral Director Monthly
• Free editorial in Funeral Director Monthly
• Use of NAFD overseas member logo
• Invitation to attend the NAFD Conference and Annual General Meeting.
NAFD students with their diplomas
NAFD Conference is always the Saturday education sessions, and this year’s event was no exception with a bold and diverse range of speakers and topics offering delegates a thought-provoking, inspiring and entertaining morning on topics as diverse as CPD, Artificial Intelligence and Generation Z in the workplace. During the morning there was also a debate on the regulation of standards, during which NAFD Chief Executive Andrew Judd and Director of External Affairs Rachel Bradburne were joined on stage by SAIF President and joint member Declan Maguire, of Anderson Maguire in Scotland, to talk
Jenny Gilbert-Trigg
more about the collaborative work that is underway.
Over the weekend, guests enjoyed a diverse range of social events, from a relaxed street food evening and Through the Decades cabaret, to the traditional President’s
Banquet - an evening packed full of celebration and tradition, recognising the hard work of the president across twelve packed months.
On Sunday morning, Jenny Gilbert-Trigg of EC Gilbert in Leicestershire was installed as NAFD President for 2024-25 and Jenny in turn installed her first Vice President Darryl Smith of Central England Coop and second Vice President Julian Hussey of A.G. Down, as well as presenting Barry with his Past President’s medal. Her first role as president was to install the NAFD’s first ever President of the newly formed Welsh Executive, Past President Phillip Blatchly, of PR Blatchly.
Towards a joint code of practice for NAFD and SAIF
In May, the NAFD and SAIF Executives jointly announced an agreement to adopt a shared set of principles, aligned with the forthcoming Statutory Code of Practice for Funeral Directors in Scotland and consistent with the current standards required in
our separate codes of practice. The new Code, known as the UK Funeral Directors Code, consists of a set of shared principles, which means each Association will tailor additional requirements for its membership to meet, as appropriate.
These have also been shared with Government as a statement of intent about the seriousness with which NAFD and SAIF members take the need to align behind a set of common standards that will provide assurance to the public.
NAFD and SAIF support local authority visits in England
The National Association Of Funeral Directors and the National Society of Allied and Independent Funeral Directors are working closely with the Government to build a format for reassurance visits by local authorities to funeral homes across England, which could begin in the coming weeks. The two trade bodies have provided a checklist using the combined experience of our inspectors and against an
agreed set of shared principles consistent with the standards set out in our respective Codes of Practice. We will also be supporting the visits, through assisting with training and through a network of volunteer funeral directors across the UK who are on standby to answer questions and explain what good practice looks like.
The local authorities intend to visit all funeral homes –
including those not in any trade association membership. We would encourage all funeral firms in England to cooperate with environmental health teams and take the opportunity to demonstrate your quality and standards if a visit is requested. It is vitally important we reassure the public that they can trust in the compassion and professionalism of their chosen funeral director.
NAFD Inspire – a new continuous professional development platform for the funeral sector
NAFD Inspire, the Association’s new Continuous Professional Development (CPD) learning platform was launched at NAFD Conference in May, with a range of learning modules designed to be delivered in bitesize chunks and tailored to the needs of the individual learner.
Users can access modules relevant to their roles, broadening their understanding of different funeral customs, changes in regulation and the impact of grief – to support them in delivering the best possible client service and standards. They can also access modules to support their own mental health and wellbeing.
Andrew Judd, NAFD Chief Executive, said: “Think of NAFD Inspire as like having
access to your own training and development department, supported by the NAFD with funeral specific and broader leadership and professional development modules, with NAFD member businesses in mind.
“Professional development is not just a necessity, it’s a reflection of our dedication to the growth and success of our members. It strengthens our community, making it more resilient and adaptable in an ever-changing professional landscape.”
NAFD is open to the entire funeral sector – although there are significant benefits of subscribing as an NAFD member. For members who subscribe early, and in honour of the NAFD turning 120 in 2025, the basic subscription price to access all of NAFD
Inspire’s CPD courses and webinars will be just £120 for the period until 31 March 2025. This includes one user access log in, with additional users available from as little as £19 per person per year. Inspire Plus – which includes access to the NAFD Inspire AI app, a company-branded portal and bespoke additional CPD courses – and much more – is available from £4,995 per year and a Inspire Pro, a fully bespoke option, created exclusively around the needs of your business is also available.
Contact education@nafd.org. uk to discuss your individual needs, so that you and your team can start learning without limits on NAFD Inspire today.
New Alumni programme for DipFD graduates
To support students who have gained their DipFD, the NAFD has launched a new subscription-based Alumni programme.
Designed to offer ongoing support to those who have progressed through the NAFD Education pathway and gained their Diploma, NAFD Alumni will have their own Continuous Professional Development online platform, giving diploma holders access to key professional development modules, webinars, and legislation and regulation updates. In addition to the opportunity to access CPD, NAFD Alumni will have access to an Alumni Assistance App (provided by BHSF). The App will
give access to several additional benefits such as health and well-being advice and counselling and support services.
Alison Crake, Chair of the NAFD Board of Education, said: “In an ever-changing funeral landscape, it is more important than ever, that we offer continuous support to our diploma holders following their graduation.”
Graduates not already signed up are encouraged to talk to the NAFD Education team – email education@nafd.org.uk.
Vibrant NFE 2024 delivers information, education and opportunity in equal measure
Over three days in June, the funeral sector came together to learn, be inspired and spend time together in a vibrant and future focused environment as the 2024 National Funeral Exhibition opened its doors at Stoneleigh Park in Warwickshire.
For the first time in its long history, the show offered two weekday open days as well as a Saturday, for those visitors unable to step away from work during the week.
Feedback from exhibitors and visitors alike was that this change of open days worked well – as it provided two focused days with business decision makers, which resulted in meaningful dialogue, connections and opportunities, followed by a busy Saturday with family businesses, groups of colleagues and smaller business owners packing the two halls.
All told, almost 5,000 people walked through the doors of Stoneleigh for NFE 2024, making it
Across the three days, the Inspire Lecture Theatre sessions were packed, with visitors taking time to earn vital CPD points while listening to speakers on everything from bereavement and grief to social media and marketing.
NAFD President Jenny Gilbert-Trigg toured the stands during the show, meeting as many exhibitors and visitors as possible.
one of the NAFD’s most successful shows ever!
Grave matters
“How poor this world would be without its graves, without the memories of its mighty dead.” (Robert Green Ingersoll.)
“Would you take my grave as quick” Often asked when the opportunist in me would surface and I’d grab a person’s seat if they vacated it for even a few seconds. If you are near my age and of rural Irish background you remember the awkward and not very witty chat-up line, “Would you like to be buried with my people?”
Graves are central to Irish culture. The word crops up time and again in the titles of books, songs and poems; From “The Graves at Kilmorna” to “Sharon’s Grave”. It’s there in comedy and tragedy. At the tail-end of Listowel Writers’ Week I learned of a publication titled Reusing Old Graves, an examination of, among other things, the reuse of graves by a different family.
By Mattie Lennon
delivered a paper Graves for the Future, to the Joint Conference of Burial and Cremation Authorities. As part of Professor Davies’s research the question, “What period of time should elapse before a grave could be used for new burials by a different family?” was put to 1,603 adults from Glasgow, Sunderland, Nottingham, and the London boroughs of Barking and Dagenham.
Three percent were undecided and of the other 97% 35% said they shouldn’t ever be used. The other 62% gave periods ranging from 1 year to 200 years. The most popular being 100, 50, 20, 30, 75, 150 and 10, in that order.
Professor Douglas Davies was commissioned to carry out research resulting from concerns by managers of municipal cemeteries in the UK that local authorities were running out of land for burials. Ian Hussein
I feel that the “not evers “would be more than 35% on this island. Our family burial ground is in Baltyboys. Whenever my mother or I would suggest any conversions in the home my father, who wasn’t a fan of change, would usually say, “Do what yez like when yez lave me in Baltyboys.” However, I don’t think his permission would extend to having his remains disturbed by strangers.
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Maher’s, Portarlington, Laois collect their new Passat hearse from Quinn Hearse and Limousine
Northern Ireland Chest Heart & Stroke
A small monthly gift can make a life-changing difference
Craig Shilliday, who is 51 and from Portadown, suffered a stroke in March 2019.
He is an Ambassador for Northern Ireland Chest Heart & Stroke (NICHS) as well as an active fundraiser, supporting the charity’s work through regular monthly donations.
Craig was on holiday in Canada when he suffered his stroke. He and his wife Allison had popped back to their apartment when he noticed weakness in his arms, his face drooped on one side, and his speech started to slur.
“I felt perfectly fine and then, without any warning, BANG! I’m lucky that my wife knew straight away what it was”, explains Craig.
Allison knew that his symptoms matched the FAST advertisement and rushed Craig to hospital in Toronto.
“When they say the quicker you act, the more you save, they are right! I was at hospital within 25 minutes.”
Upon returning to Northern Ireland Craig was visited at home by Lynn, a member of NICHS’s Care Team.
“Very early on I wasn’t in work, I wasn’t allowed to drive, I was enormously frustrated. Lynn signed me up for NICHS’s Post Rehab Exercise Programme in Lurgan. In the end, I did it twice! It opened my eyes as to how bad it all could have been.”
Most of Craig’s symptoms aren’t immediately obvious but they have had a profound impact on his life. “Physically I recovered quite quickly, in terms of day-to-day movements. If you saw me on the street, you wouldn’t know I had had a stroke. But the stroke fatigue has been debilitating and I’ve had to build back fitness step by step.”
“I now have a bit of a stutter and when I’m tired or stressed, two words just won’t come
Craig and Allison Shilliday
together. Part of my job used to be writing complex instructions as an ICT service analyst, now I’d be lucky to follow them, never mind write them!”
“The NICHS team taught me how to pace myself, how to manage my symptoms and how to set goals and they are there if I ever need them.”
Keen to give something back, Craig now supports NICHS’s work with a regular monthly donation. “I am so grateful for the support I received from NICHS, so I just thought, ‘why don’t I help?’.”
For more information on how to set up a regular monthly donation to NICHS, and how your gift will help others like Craig, visit nichs.org.uk and select How You Can Help. For more information about our stroke services, visit: nichs.org.uk/stroke-support
Jennifer Muldowney is an event planner for memorials in the United States of America and Ireland and is currently partnered with the prestigious Frank E. Campbell - The Funeral Chapel in NYC as their in-house event planner.
Jennifer is also notable as author of Say Farewell Your Way, Tedx speaker of ‘Grief as Unique as your Heartbeat’ and host of ‘The Glam Reaper Podcast’. Check out Muldowney Memorials (.com) to learn more.
By Jennifer Muldowney
AI + Deathcare: Technology + Grief
(Continued from Issue 2...)
In recent years, technology has revolutionized numerous industries, and the funeral industry is no exception. The integration of advanced technologies, including artificial intelligence (AI), has sparked a transformation in how we approach grief, bereavement, and funeral planning. While these innovations offer several advantages, they also present challenges that need careful consideration. This article explores the pros and cons of technology in the death space, focusing on AI, grief management, bereavement support, and funeral services.
Technology has made funeral planning more accessible and convenient. Online platforms allow families to plan and arrange funerals from the comfort of their homes, reducing the stress associated with traditional funeral planning.
Virtual funeral services have also become popular, enabling distant relatives and friends to participate in memorials and celebrations of life, regardless of geographical barriers.
AI is increasingly being used to assist in grief and bereavement, offering new ways to memorialize and remember loved ones.
Groundbreaking initiatives in media and technology have highlighted AI’s ability to recreate the voices and likenesses of deceased individuals, providing a digital afterlife that can offer comfort to the bereaved.
AI-powered chatbots and virtual counselors offer round-the-clock support to those
experiencing grief. These tools provide immediate responses, helpful resources, and coping strategies, offering a lifeline to individuals who may not have access to traditional therapy or support groups. Online communities and forums also facilitate connections between people who share similar experiences, fostering a sense of belonging and understanding.
The use of AI and digital platforms raises significant privacy concerns. Collecting and analyzing personal data to create digital memorials or personalized tributes can be invasive. Families may worry about how their loved ones’ data is stored, used, and protected. Ensuring robust data privacy and security measures is essential to address these concerns and maintain trust.
A notable example is the case of Matteo Sachman, a student who died on New Years Eve in New York City. This case, reported by The New York Times (below), underscores the emotional resonance and ethical implications of such technology.
“As the circle of people learning the news widened beyond Mr. Sachman’s immediate family, concern and curiosity about his shocking death led many of them to Google, where they typed his name and what little they knew into the search bar:
Matteo Sachman subway accident.
Matteo Sachman obituary.
Matteo Sachman death.
“They
- Caleb Wilde of ‘Confessions of a Funeral Director’ fam e
But instead of answers, anybody searching for information was confronted by a blizzard of poorly written news articles, shady-looking YouTube videos and inaccurate obituaries. Some said he was 29 years old (he was 19) and was from Nantucket. (His family spent summers there, but he was from New York.)
Others made an even more shocking claim: Mr. Sachman, they falsely reported, had been stabbed to death in a Bronx subway station. In fact, according to a statement from his family, Mr. Sachman and a friend were fooling around on a platform at the East Broadway stop in Manhattan, when he fell onto the tracks and was killed instantly by a train entering the station.”
The use of AI and collecting and storing of human data has long surpassed what the legal system can protect and at the core of it are vulnerable and grieving families. The rise of “grief tech” startups such as Replika, HereAfter AI, StoryFile, and Seance AI reflects a growing industry aimed at helping individuals cope with loss. These platforms offer services ranging from interactive video conversations with the deceased to virtual avatars that act as companions. While these technologies offer new ways to process grief, they also raise significant ethical questions. The emergence of AI chatbots like Midjourney, designed to engage users in conversations about grief and loss, highlights both the potential for support and the risks of emotional dependency.
The proliferation of AI chatbots and digital replicas in the context of grief and bereavement necessitates careful consideration of ethical and regulatory frameworks. Issues of consent, data privacy, and the preservation of digital legacies in perpetuity are paramount. Establishing clear guidelines and regulatory measures is crucial to safeguard the integrity of AI-driven mourning practices while respecting diverse cultural and religious beliefs surrounding death and commemoration.
AI-driven technologies are opening new
avenues for preserving the legacies of iconic figures. Holographic technologies and voice synthesis have been used to bring deceased celebrities back to life, offering audiences a glimpse into the future of mourning and commemoration. As discussed in the last issue, from Edith Piaf and John Lennon to Tupac Shakur, these posthumous representations blur the boundaries between the living and the dead. However, the ethical considerations surrounding their use are complex.
As AI continues to evolve, individuals and families can proactively engage with these technologies to prepare for end-oflife arrangements. Digital legacy planning and the preservation of personal narratives are becoming increasingly important. AIpowered grief support platforms and virtual memorialization services offer practical guidance on navigating the complexities of grief in a digitized world.
While technology offers convenience, it can sometimes lead to impersonal interactions. The absence of face-to-face communication may hinder the emotional support that grieving individuals need. AI chatbots, despite their capabilities, cannot replicate the empathy and understanding that a human counselor provides. This lack of personal touch can make some feel isolated or unsupported during their grief journey.
The intersection of AI and grief represents a transformative potential in redefining our experiences of bereavement, death, and the funeral process. Whether you are a healthcare professional, technologist, funeral industry expert, or someone touched by the profound realities of mortality, understanding the evolving landscape of AI-driven end-of-life care and mourning practices is essential. By engaging in thoughtful dialogue and establishing ethical guidelines, we can navigate the complexities of grief in a digital age, ensuring that technology serves to support and not exploit our most vulnerable moments.
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David and PJ Lambe from Tullamore, Co. Offaly are pictured collecting their new Mercedes hearse from Pierce Coachbuilders, who would like to thank them again for their business.
LARGER COFFINS
New Ambassador for Northern Ireland Kidney Research
We are thrilled to announce that Renal Nurse Ms. Hannah Johns, recently crowned ‘Miss Northern Ireland,’ has been appointed as an Ambassador to NIKRF. Her new title grants her entry to the Miss World Competition next year, representing Northern Ireland. Hannah has chosen NIKRF as her nominated charity, and we can’t wait to collaborate with her.
Modern beauty pageants emphasise raising awareness for important causes as much as they celebrate beauty. Hannah is dedicated to prioritising the cause of raising awareness about kidney disease and the importance of research. We are very excited to work with Hannah and support her efforts in this vital mission.
Hannah says: “One of my most impressive accomplishments is my journey as a nurse,
Hannah will be competing in the Miss World competition next year as Miss Northern Ireland
particularly training during the COVID-19 pandemic. I discovered my passion for #renalnursing and became deeply involved in renal services. This led to my work with the Northern Ireland Kidney Research Fund, where I was honoured with the role as an Ambassador, raising awareness and securing funding for crucial research.”
New Chair for the Northern Ireland Kidney Research Fund
We are deeply indebted to Susan Kee who has been our chair for the last 4 years and led us with vision and energy through some very difficult times. Our new chair is the Rev. Jim McCaughan, a retired Presbyterian minister from the north coast.
Jim writes, “I first heard of the Northern Ireland Kidney Research Fund when they gave our daughter, Jennifer, a generous grant for her doctoral research, and she
Jim McCaughan
told us about this wonderful charity. My wife Alison and I decided to get involved and have really enjoyed building new friendships and supporting a great cause. I feel greatly privileged to receive the baton from Susan and to carry the work forwards with my dedicated colleagues on the board of trustees and supported by the whole NIKRF family.”
Hannah and renal nurses took part in the Belfast City Marathon 2024
Hannah at the Balmoral Show
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Anger: roots and responses
By Dr Bill Webster
“I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take it anymore.”
These words, written by novelist Paddy Chayefsky, were made famous by Howard Beale (played by British actor Peter Finch) in the 1976 movie “Network”. Beale was a TV news anchor who abandons the teleprompter script, and lets out all of his frustrations about the world in which he lives.
“I don’t have to tell you things are bad. We know things are bad – worse than bad. Everybody’s out of work or scared of losing their job. Shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Gangs are running wild in the street and
there’s nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do. It’s like everything everywhere is going crazy. We sit in our houses, scared to go out, and all we say is: ‘“Just leave us alone.’
“Well, I’m not gonna leave you alone. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs, and go to the window. Open it, stick your head out, and yell: ‘I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not gonna take this anymore!’ ” (Adapted from original speech, which you can watch on YouTube)
And, in the movie, people all over the country responded and did just that!
This speech feels just as relevant to the world we live in today as it did in its release nearly 50
First you hurt, then you heal
Dr. Bill Webster understands grief not just in theory, but also from personal experience. In his book, “First you Hurt, Then you Heal”, Dr. Bill outlines a road map for the grief journey in a series of articles that take us through the process .
He begins with a chapter entitled “I Didn’t Plan for This” that gives people an understanding of what they may experience in the early days after a loss. The book then goes on to give us an understanding of grief, some insights into various situations of loss, and some strategies to help us work through the process.
This book will be a helpful resource for those who are going through a grief process as well
as containing much relevant and practical information for those who would like to know what they can say and how they can help someone who has experienced a significant loss. It will also serve as a basic knowledge and layman’s guide for those in the helping professions such as nurses, teachers, funeral directors and those who seek to support grieving people, young and old, through their work.
“First you Hurt, Then you Heal” provides practical, down to earth and effective insight into one of the most difficult topics and most misunderstood experiences of life.
First you Hurt, Then you Heal: A Road Map for the Grief Journey (Kindle Edition) is available to buy on Amazon.
years ago. People are upset, angry, and “as mad as hell” about many situations, national, local and personal. They have every right to protest because circumstances in their world seem beyond their control, and they feel helpless. Anger is usually an emotional reaction, rarely a cognitive one. Think about it. In an emotional moment, we say something in an angry outburst. Sometime later, when we think about it, we regret the things we said impulsively.
I am not saying that we don’t have the right to be angry. Someone described anger as a “hedge against humiliation” which is how I understand “Beale’s” outburst. But anger can be cathartic and it can be destructive. While people may be justified in their anger, that does not warrant them venting that wrath on people who really least deserve to be targets of it. That’s the problem with anger … it often gets misdirected. The problem is that what people rant and rave about is often not the real reason for their reaction. More often than not, what really infuriates them is feelings that they are powerless to change their situation.
Often, professionals like funeral directors or counsellors become the focus of people’s anger because in spite of their best efforts they can’t give their clients the thing they really want the most, namely the return of their loved one and the way things were before.
So, when you are confronted by an angry, irate person, consider the following steps:
1. Reacting in kind always makes things worse. To respond in a similarly aggressive manner surrenders control over what happens next. So, remove yourself and your ego from the situation. At all times, maintain dignity and respect. Be aware of your facial expression and posture. For most of us, this probably means biting your lip while controlling your own natural human responses.
2. Practice your body language for such situations. Make this a “staff exercise” with role plays. Try to adopt a non-threatening and understanding posture and show little emotion. Create the impression that you are relaxed, even though your insides may be churning.
3. Listen carefully for clues. Find out what the
person feels, wants, and what exactly their problem is. Be empathetic. Nod or shake your head appropriately. Ask as many questions as you can. This forces the person out of the right (emotional) brain where anger is ignited into the left (logical) brain which will result in a more rational and calm response. Listen to what is being said. For example, someone says, “I feel so angry.” You can ask, “What do you feel angry about? Who has made you angry? When did you start feeling angry? How does this make you feel?” and by the time they have answered all the questions, they will have diffused their anger and may even feel you are the most understanding person they ever met.
4. Develop a plan to resolve the problem, allowing the person to be a part of the solution, so that they think it is their idea. “What can we do to resolve our problem” is a great approach because it’s not their problem or solution, we are working together to make it our solution. You might begin the conversation by saying “Would it be an idea to ....” and help create solutions and options. People often feel embarrassed after an angry outburst so give them a way out, an action to take to help them save face.
Remember, anger is a reaction to a sense of powerlessness, so the more you can empower the person to make a decision or come up with a solution, the more you will defuse the root cause.
A metaphor that helped me get a perspective on how to handle anger is that a professional person should be like a lightning rod. When lightning strikes, it can cause great damage and destruction. Anger is the same.
But if we can “conduct” that anger … allowing it to strike but then redirecting it to “ground” where it can be safely dissipated, we do people a great service.
Always bear in mind that the rational, objective person has the upper hand. Remember too, that even this angry individual, if you handle it well, could be a future customer. For by dealing wisely with difficult people, you can turn someone who could be a bitter enemy into a grateful friend.
