RTN North Edition 604 by Round Town News

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Issue 604

13 - 19 May 2011

RIP gentle giant

THE TRAGIC death of a lost dog – fondly named ‘Gentle Giant’ or ‘GG’ – prompted tomorrow’s dog show to raise funds for a new animal shelter p7

The poetry of colour EDUCATIONAL AND fun, Lynda Jane Smith’s book ‘Colour In My World’ appeals to all ages and is reaching out to all corners of the world. Lynda targeted a nine to 12-year-old age group when she first began writing but soon discovered it delighted children and adults alike p24

Stop putting it off: make that will

WHAT IS always on the bottom of your list of to-dos? We’ve all got them. Read more on p31

I’m thinking of opening a restaurant Find out more with our new columnist Edwin cheeseman p49

Pl knows FA about the cup

THERE HAS always been something special about FA Cup final day p62

Chaos and disaster by Jack Troughton EIGHT PEOPLE died and dozens were badly injured – some critically – when an

earthquake hit the ancient town of Lorca on Wednesday. The epicentre was at

a depth of just six miles, along the major fault line called the Alhama de Murcia – where the European and African continental plates are said to “rub together” under the Medi-

terranean. Panic spread through the streets as people were struck by falling rubble as the quake struck at 18.47. Two hours earlier there had been a milder tremor of 4.4 magnitude.

A military 400-strong taskforce was immediately mobilised along with civilian workers and rescue dogs to help search the debris for victims. Continued on page 3

13 - 19 may 2011

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SAN MIGUEL TORREVIEJA QUESADA ALGORFA ORIHUELA ORIHUELA SAN FULGENCIO LA MARINA MURCIA GUARDAMAR

See our article on page 33

13 - 19 May 2011

Continued from front page Servicemen and women are now working to stabilise historic buildings left stricken by the tremors measuring 5.2 on the Richter scale – reportedly felt as far away as Madrid. Fleets of ambulances were sent to the town and the Red Cross established ‘field hospitals’ to treat the flow of wounded. KILLED Officials initially said at least 10 people were killed but were later able to downgrade the figure. An estimated 10,000 people were believed to have been displaced. Murcia and the Bronze Age town of Lorca are popular with expats and British visitors. The British Embassy confirmed yesterday (Thursday) that no UK citizens were reported to have been injured. Manuel Campos, Minister of Justice in the Murcia government, said the earthquake brought “chaos and disaster” to the town. “The whole of the centre of Lorca has been seriously damaged. There are thousands of very disorientated people.” Mayor of Lorca Francisco Jodar said the final number of fatalities caused by landslides and falling debris could not be confirmed until an organised house

Charity shop success

by house search was carried out. “We are trying to find out if there are people inside the collapsed houses,” he said. ALLEYWAY Lorca has a population of around 90,000 and probably took its name from the Romans. The old quarter of the town is made up of narrow alleyways and built in the shadow of a fortress; its many architectural features include churches, Roman columns, medieval walls and gates. Graphic images of the disaster were captured on film as journalists and television crews arrived to cover the initial earthquake – one TV reporter lucky to escape with his life as part of a church bell tower crashed to the ground behind him. Parked cars were left crushed under tons of debris as the second quake hit Lorca and a hospital was evacuated as a precaution. Pictures showed shocked residents and workers fleeing buildings, and groups of emotional people huddled together unable to comprehend what was happening. And doctors led medical teams through the streets to treat casualties many found “unconscious” with head injuries, with ambulances unable to reach the injured because of the debris strewn across roads.

Luis

Electric party

It was estimated a third of the population of Lorca slept out overnight near their homes, too scared to return indoors because of the fear of aftershocks, and the Red Cross set up a temporary shelter with 800 beds. DEBRIS One witness told RTN: “It was horrible, shocking. Debris was crashing down on people in the streets. It was like a scene from a disaster movie.” Another said: “My hands are still shaking. Everyone was really scared – the streets were covered with debris and glass, there was water everywhere as mains burst.” And the noise of the earthquake was described as being “like an express train going overhead”. One woman said her home began to shake. “Everything began to move, pictures fell off the wall and the television fell over – outside there were people running into the street, the tremors seemed to go on forever.” Spain suffers hundreds of earthquakes every year, many of them to small to be noticed by the public but carefully studied by scientists. As one Lorca resident said as he surveyed the wreckage: “We knew we lived by a fault line but never thought this would happen – people are now very afraid, no one has seen anything like this before.”

BUSY VOLUNTEERS of the Charity Shop of Calpe have raised more than 1,000€ to support the town’s EMAUS Children’s Home. An Easter raffle run at the shop itself contributed 601€ - with prizes being donated by a number of local businesses including Bertomeu Electrics, Hotel Sol y Charity shop success Mar, and Restaurants BeniAsia and Dracula. BUSY VOLUNTEERS The shop also took a stall at the antiques and Collectors Fair at El Canor, Teulada, where a further 409€Charity was raised; all items of the Shop of for sale being donated by generous customers. Volunteers will man a stand at the next fair at El Canor on 6th December and the Charity Calpe have raised more Shop welcomes donations of china, glass and silver to sell.

by Jack Troughton A LUCKY 13 models braved the catwalk as party of the Original Charity Shop and Library’s 40th anniversary celebrations. At Javea’s Grand Café Toscamar, the ladies showed a mixture of designer labels and previously owned clothes in a colourful and stunning combination. The models each wore five outfits – casual wear, sport and swim wear, elegant day clothes for ‘Ladies who lunch’, dresses for afternoon tea, and a selection of evening clothes. And the show and dinner dance was attended by 130 people, with all proceeds going to the Gandia Refuge Transformer Appeal to provide electricity to the new wing of the Franciscan run home.

Showing off colourful outfits

13 - 19 may 2011

The age of the train in Spain

Amnesty for black market workers Workers discovered working while claiming dole will lose their benefit

The AVEHigh speed and comfort

by Jan Gamm THE EUROPEAN Union is introducing dramatic proposals to encourage European passengers to opt for rail travel for short haul trips. The aim is to reduce carbon dioxide emissions from transport by 60% over the next 40 years. Spain has led by example by introducing a high speed service by rail from Madrid to Barcelona, reducing short haul flights between the cities by 50%. And not only is the AVE service fast, it is also comfortable. An additional advantage to travelling by train is that train stations are often more centrally located for business and shopping; whereas air links invariably involve connecting via train, bus or taxi to arrive at destination.

By Jan Gamm Following Cabinet approval, a Royal Decree was passed last Saturday that allows employers to register their ‘black market’ workers onto the Social Security system without incurring a fine. The practice of paying employees ‘on the black’ and often in cash, is costing the Spanish government a fortune in lost revenue. A three month period of ‘amnesty’ is valid until 31st July, after which applicable fines will be increased fivefold and could reach 10,000€ for employers found in breach of Social Security requirements. The minimum amount payable will be 3,126€.

Workers discovered working while claiming dole will lose their benefit payment and receive a minimum personal fine of 10,000€ that could escalate to 187,500€ depending on circumstances. In addition, companies found employing ‘black market’ workers will lose any government grants that are current and also be excluded from further applications for two years. The move is part of a government objective to regularise the workforce and inject tax revenue. A team of government inspectors have been engaged to administrate the campaign.

Running out of water THE DEMAND for water in the area served by the Mancomunidad de Canales del Taibilla in the Vega Baja is set to rise to 320 hectometres per year by 2025, compared to the current demand for 216 hectometres. This is according to a study carried out by the Tourism Research Institute at the University of Alicante. The region is one of the driest in Europe. The study blames the widespread construction of new residential areas, and the golf courses in the area for the increased demand.

Paedophile hires boat for the purpose of abusing his own children NATIONAL POLICE in Palma de Mallorca arrested a 32-year-old German citizen on Wednesday for allegedly sexually abusing his own children, recording the assaults on video and distributing them among paedophile rings via the internet. Investigations by the Technological Investigation Brigade (BIT) in corroboration with agents in the Balearic Islands were prompted following reports of images appearing online featuring the children being assaulted by an adult and also being forced to perform sex acts upon each other. The man being detained, who calls himself ‘Cool Daddy’, also furnished viewers of the videos with a contact email address for others interested in abusing minors. Some of the images, taken when the children

The marina in Mallorca where a boat was hired for purpose

were aged three and nine, were captured in the cabin of a boat later found to be hired for the purpose. At the time of the arrest the man was in possession of a memory card with several other recordings of a child aged around seven, purported to be the daughter of his former partner. He and the children involved were identified by parents at a primary school they previously attended, from a photograph.

Mum’s the word by Jack Troughton THREE BRITISH mums are playing a key role in a Marina Alta community as the population prepares to go to the polls in the local elections on 22nd May. They are part of the CDP, the Democratic Coalition of Parcent, a non-political coalition of neighbours formed four years ago to successfully stop three urbanisation plans that threatened to concrete over the countryside and swamp the village. And now with four years of town hall experience, Deputy Mayor Jacqui Cotterill is joined at the heart of the party by Penny Clark and Victoria Putt-Gillin. Because of the unique history of how the CDP was formed and its initial aims, the battle for Parcent Town Hall is once again a two horse race. Jacqui explained: “All the other parties have agreed not to stand so we are going head to head with the Partido Popular. “We are a coalition of neighbours of all political persuasions but now with four years of experience of getting things done.” Control of the purse strings is important for any local authority, and Penny said the coalition had “proved” its worth by sorting out the budget. DEBT Jacqui, a mother of four and also the Treasurer, said four years ago they discovered 230,000€ of unpaid bills “literally in a red folder” that represented debts owed for the town’s day to day running. However, through austerity measures the bills were paid and accounts for 2008, 2009 and 2010 were all positive and in the black: “We now live within the budget.” Penny, a mother of three, first became active in the community by joining the parent teachers association at the local school and is committed to improving facilities for young people in Parcent. “I think in the CDP we have taken the best pieces of local Spanish support and British support,” she said. “Some of us are bringing fresh ideas and others are really rooted and determined. “Some of us are more prepared to really get to the heart of what people want and encouraging them to come and speak to us.” Integration is important in such a close knit community. Victoria, a mother of two, writes a ‘what’s on’ website that

(left to right) Victoria, Penny and Jacqui

13 - 19 May 2011

Standing united THE ’MOSAIC’ of nationalities living in Alicante came together for a huge party complete with giant paella to celebrate Europe Day on Monday. La Nucia hosted a knees-up for around 1,000 people at Plaza de Les Nits complete with music, dancing and singing. The provincial councillor for European Residents Maria Prieto and La Nucia Mayor Bernabe Cano welcomed everyone to the party and a day to celebrate integration of the different peoples living in the region. “This day shows the mosaic of nationalities living here in Spain and is a celebration for all the people who have decided to make their home in the province of Alicante,” said the councillor. And while people enjoyed live performances on stage, there was also the opportunity to learn more about traditional crafts of the Marina Baja, such as making fishing nets, basket weaving and pottery.

involves people in all aspects of Parcent life. WELCOME “I came here from Orba and Oliva and you are just made welcome straight away – I just want people to be kept informed and what is going on here,” she said. Jacqui added: “This is all about the village and getting the best for the community – it is not about politics and we are not politicians.” Cooking the And Penny said: “None of us aim to have a political career paella out of it; it is just about the village. We are a mixture of men and women, young and old – a great variety of different experiences and ages which reinforces the whole coalition.” She said being involved was a “fantastic experience” – Victoria described it as “something wonderful”. Jacqui said the main task ahead was to draw up a plan for BIGGER BOATS could soon have mooring spaces in the mariParcent’s future, planning a new school, youth centre, and na in Dénia. The Department of Infrastructure and Transport public buildings, boosting the economy with sustainable has made public a request by the company Varadero Port tourist attractions – while protecting the greatest asset, the Dénia S.L. to build moorings for large boats. The company mountainside surrounding the village. already operates a shipyard in the marina, offering repair “The reason why we have stood again is that we have not and maintenance for yachts up to 90 metres in length. finished the job and we need a new General Plan,” she said.

Project to add moorings to Dénia port

13 - 19 may 2011

Ryanair reacts to court decision on airbridges

Bar owners battle for terrace space

THE WAR over terrace space for bars in central Benidorm continues. The town hall has now decided not to immediately enforce the new law, which limits the number of outdoor chairs and tables. However, the law will come into effect in June. Bar owners must apply for the amount of terrace space they want and wait for an approval, if not, businesses risk being fined.

Ryanair boarding passengers

by Jan Gamm ON TUESDAY the Commercial Court in Elche ruled to uphold a decision in favour of AENA, insisting that Ryanair must utilise airbridges for boarding and disembarking it’s passengers at newly opened El Altet airport. Ryanair’s CEO, the flamboyant Michael O’Leary, recently threatened to withdraw a significant service from Alicante representing huge losses in jobs and revenue if the ruling was upheld. The ruling supports the claims of AENA: that the airbridges promote safety, efficiency and economy at the new terminal. Mr O’Leary sees the matter differently and believes Ryanair should be allowed to pursue a more economical method of boarding passengers directly, negating the need to pay charges to AENA for use of the airbridges. Spain’s largest airline responded calmly to the court’s decision and acknowledges AENA’s authority but also points out

that the company is in breach of regulations by refusing Ryanair’s reasonable request to use walk-on/walk off boarding procedures at Alicante El Altet. NOT LEGITIMATE The Alicante Court also ruled that AENA’s offer of a review of boarding procedures in 12 months’ time “was not legitimate.” Ryanair is calling for an immediate end to AENA’s casual approach to the regulations and is also requesting in writing an immediate refund of the airbridge fees wrongly charged since March. Speaking to RTN today, Ryanair’s Head of Communications Stephen McNamara said, “ The court ruling that AENA has breached its dominant position and competition rules will, we hope, lead to AENA working cooperatively with Ryanair in future, instead of imposing unnecessary facilities and unlawful costs as AENA Alicante has done since 24th March last.”

Space must be approved or owners risk hefty fine

French students help veterans commemorate end of the war THE FRENCH School in El Campello commemorated the 66th Anniversary of the end of World War II on Tuesday with veterans that included French and British ex-paratroopers and one 80-year-old French soldier who served at the front and in the Spanish Civil War. The students’ choir performed renditions of the national anthems of Spain, France and the European Union

13 - 19 May 2011

RIP ‘Gentle Giant’ by Jack Troughton

SLEEP

THE TRAGIC death of a lost dog – fondly named ‘Gentle Giant’ or ‘GG’ – prompted tomorrow’s dog show to raise funds for a new animal shelter. La Solana Kennels in Jalon has organised the event – complete with country fair – in memory of the huge white dog. It starts at 11am with dog show registration at 1pm and the show itself at 2pm with classes for pedigree and fun classes. Found wandering the roads near Jalon just before last Christmas, GG was not chipped and his owners could not be located, despite posters being put up across the area. The lady who found him was unable to house the dog over Christmas – she was going away – so La Solana agreed to take him at a reduced rate, on the understanding GG stayed somewhere else over the holiday itself because they were fully booked.

A Marina Alta charity offered a temporary home until GG could be returned to La Solana but sadly there was a problem with two other dogs and the Gentle Giant was injured and had to be put to sleep. Pauline Curtis, of new animal charity AKIRI, told RTN: “Everyone was devastated - the lady who found him, La Solana, myself, and of course people at the shelter. “It all boiled down to the fact there was nowhere to take care of this lovely large dog until a home could be found for him. “It was so sad and this really prompted us into founding AKIRI and looking for a shelter for Benissa, Teulada and Moraira, so this situation could not occur again.” She said as a “gesture” La Solana Kennels offered to help raise funds in the quest of building a dog shelter “and in a way, remember the Gentle Giant.”

THE ONDARA Municipal Football School is to be among the first to receive a grant approved by the Committee for Culture and Sport within the Diputación de Alicante. The grant is worth 300,000€ and will benefit 106 municipalities within the Alicante Province, 22 of which are located in the Marina Alta.

Rapist dies in the act him. The victim reports that she refused and he began to rape her, but became ill and short of breath. The victim drove her attacker to hospital even though she has not yet passed her test – as she felt it would be quicker than calling an ambulance. The man was pronounced dead on arrival.

Poetry in motion

Ondara Football School to receive funding

A MAN has died of a heart attack whilst raping his ex girlfriend near Valencia. The man is reported as ‘young’ and forensics are currently investigating the reason behind his cardiac arrest. The man was in his car with his ex in the village of Pinedo, near Valencia, and tried to persuade her to have sex with

Paul entrances students

By Jack Troughton CHILDREN’S POET Paul Cookson performed for Costa Blanca students bringing his work to life in a style that entertained, amused and inspired. Visiting Xabia International College, the teacher and writer frequently visits schools and his work has proved popular with pupils of all ages. Paul first had a collection of poems published in 1980 and has sold more than 500,000 books – however, his early ambitions were to play football for Everton, or electric guitar with the glam rockers Slade. Demanding plenty of audience participation from his Javea audience, Paul recited poetry on topics as varied as favourite topics Everton and Slade, to the fitting ‘The Truth About Teachers’, all a great success with students and staff.

13 - 19 May 2011

13 - 19 may 2011

Alan Gilchrist

Panic for millions of people around the World! IT’S THAT time of the year again that

The Costa Blanca’s causes millions of people to live in terTop Hypnotherapist ror for 24 hours. Another Friday 13th

is now upon us again. Millions of people throughout the world live in terror of this particular day, and virtually become a recluse in their own home with this phobia - an irrational fear that something awful is about to befall them. Such superstitious beliefs are quite prevalent in Greece and Spain where usually Tuesday the 13th is considered the unluckiest day. In 2009 there were three Friday 13ths for the poor phobic person to endure – February, March and November. Thankfully this doesn’t happen again until 2015 and 2026 but each year has at least one of them and 2011 falls into that category in May. Did you know that the fear of the number 13 is called Triskaidekaphobia, and the fear of Friday 13th is called Paraskavedekatriaphobia? The phobia Paraskavedekatriaphobia derives from a 99-year-old word made up of a combination of the Norse and Greek roots words for ‘Friday’ (Paraskeví), ‘13’ (dekatreís) and ‘fear’ (phobia). Friday has long been considered unlucky for many reasons such as in religion with Jesus being crucified on a Friday, to the mythical: Frigga was a Scandinavian love goddess, who was

worshipped on the sixth day of the week. Christians called Frigga a witch, and considered Friday to be the witches’ day. Some academics suggest that the fear of the number 13 originated in a myth, whereby 12 Gods were having a feast in Valhalla. It is said that the naughty and crafty Loki disrupted the event and appeared as the 13th guest, making Hod (the blind God of darkness) throw a branch of mistletoe at Balder (the God of delight and cheerfulness). Balder was instantly killed and the earth was forced into eternal darkness and mourning. One famous person who supposedly had the fear of the number 13 was Queen Victoria. The story goes that she was invited to a diner but refused to join the other guests because she would have been the 13th at the table, until someone pointed out that one of the guests was pregnant! There are millions of people throughout the world who have strange phobias and over the years I have had to help them overcome them using Fast Track Hypnosis which normally takes 4 sessions. Using the calming effects of my Fast Track Hypnosis method the subconscious mind is allowed to see the phobia in a very funny way. The theory behind this is quite simple: by laughing at your phobia, you cannot be fright-

ened of it, and if you are not frightened of it, it goes away. What started out as a personal interest about the various phobias that people can have, ended up with me compiling a list and putting in on my website. They range from the fear of the mother in law (Penthraphobia) to the fear of long words – Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia - which would in itself make the person have a phobia about a phobia! Oh, and guess

what, that’s called Phobophobia! Over the years that I have compiled the list of phobias and their names, it may surprise you to know that my list now extends to over 250 and it is still growing. Two that I have successfully treated but as yet have found no name for, is a phobia of hair remover and another of plastic spiders! Alan holds his Fast Track Hypnosis sessions in Cabo Roig, Guardamar and Benidorm.

For an appointment, brochure or a free of charge initial consultation on your particular problem, contact Alan Gilchrist on 659 229 408 or visit his websites www.alangilchrist.com www.thegastroband.com or www.fitnosys.com

Jet2.com to fly to Edinburgh from El Altet from March 2012 by Jan Gamm LOW COST airline Jet2.com has announced a new non-stop service from Alicante El Altet to Edinburgh from 29th March 2012. The service will run four trips each week and make a total of seven destinations that also includes Leeds, Manchester, Glasgow, Newcastle, Blackpool and Belfast.

Jet2 strengthens its presence in Alicante

Famous architect allegedly paid for work not completed by PP THE PARTIDO POPULAR political party is accused of paying famous architect Santiago Calatrava €5.8 million for projects that have not been constructed. The accusation, reported by the Spanish press, comes from left-wing party EsquerraUnida in Valencia. Authorities are investigating projects paid for by the PP’s Francisco Camps, and contracts indicate that Calatrava was paid for a convention centre in Castellón and three towers that were supposed to be built next to the Arts and Sciences in Valencia. Camps’ government say the projects are on hold.

13 - 19 may 2011

Watts In Britain By

Paul Watts

Choo, choo, choo, Black Lace is on the right track IT WAS fun and frolics down on Blackpool’s North Pier beach yesterday as Black Lace and a cast of hundreds cong, cong, conga-ed down across the shoreline to celebrate the launch of the group’s re-worked 1980s classic, Do The Conga. Following the huge success of the ‘thetrainline.com’ ads that feature Black Lace, the group felt it timely to re-release the disc onto an unwary public. Black Lace’s Dene Michael and Ian Robinson went back into the studio, brought the song up to date and yesterday filmed the accompanying video to the clear delight of Blackpool holiday-makers. “We’ve had as much fun with this,” said Dene, “as we did with the Agadoo Mambo 2009 video that we filmed in Albir.” As many RTN readers will know, Black Lace were based on the Costa Blanca for many years and played a big part in Benidorm’s entertainment scene. Dene was also involved with RTN’s Children in Need extravaganza back in 2005. “COLOURFUL, CATCHY AND INSTANTLY MEMORABLE” If you haven’t seen the trainline.com ad yet (because maybe you’ve been holidaying on Mars or something) you can watch it on the thetrainline.com website now. “‘Do the Conga’, was a top 10 hit in 1984,” says Iain Hildreth, director of marketing for thetrainline.com. Err, thanks Iain but we already knew that. “Aha,” he replies, “but did you know the lyrics have been changed to give information on discounts available to those wanting to save money on train travel?” Nope, didn’t realise that, Iain. He says passengers can get the best deals if they buy tickets before they travel: “People tell us that they don’t always remember to do this so our new campaign is designed to help remind them in a

colourful, catchy and instantly memorable way.” Well Iain, it’s certainly memorable and with all the prime time coverage (it’s been going out during Britain’s Got Talent etc) it’s bound to become ingrained on everyone’s mind – not sure if that’s a good thing. Iain adds, “With Black Lace on vocals and that infamous dance favourite The Conga, we’re confident our new campaign will certainly get that message across and encourage more people to take advantage of the savings on thetrainline.com to get out and about in the UK by train.” Hmmm, I’ve already booked a train ticket myself, so it must be working... FIRST PLANES, NOW TRAINS, WHAT’S NEXT? It occurs to me that Dene Michael is slowly promoting all spheres of transport. The last time I met him was to record a radio interview at Gatwick Airport. It was a cold October morning and both he and Ian had donned orange fezzes to record an advert launching Easy Jet’s new service to Agadir. You can just guess which song was tailored to fit that destination? Did you see the ad? “Agadir, dir, dir, London Gatwick all the way…” Okay lads, you’ve now done planes and trains, what’s next? How about outer space? I suggest to Dene that maybe Virgin Galactic will want an ad. “You could perhaps re-do Superman, as Spaceman,” I offer. Dene smiles, “Just as long as we don’t have to wear any silly silver costumes, like you did last time I met you...” (I’ll tell you about it sometime, folks). BLACK LACE IMMORTALISED It could be that now Blackpool has re-branded the Louis Tussauds waxworks as the ‘first Madame Tus-

Dene on platform 1

sauds in Britain outside of London’ the lads might find themselves forever ‘frozen’ in honour of their appearance in the town. I can just see Black Lace, in full Las Vegas gear pushing pineapples and shaking trees, as the centrepiece of this new tourist attraction. I will resist the temptation to make any rude remarks about how much wax they’ll get through! Watts in Blackpool, choo, choo, chooing across the beach helping Black Lace beat the world record for the longest conga line…

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This has not been thought out

THE RECENT law that Spain has adapted by allowing bicycles to be ridden on pavements of more than 3m width has not been carefully thought out. A lot of cyclists ride at speed, weaving in and out between the unsuspecting pedestrians. It’s quite a shock to the system to have a bicycle zoom past you from behind and even worse when you see one speeding towards you and you do not know which way to move to avoid a collision. In Holland the pavement area is divided into a cycle lane and a pedestrian walkway and one knows that to venture on to the cycle lane when walking will result in strong words of condemnation from cyclists; mind you, the people of Holland are born with a bicycle between their legs so they are well instructed on safety from a young age. Not so the cyclists in Spain. Most do not understand how to ride in safety on the road let alone be given the freedom to turn our pavements into a game of ‘dodge the bike’. Even in Spain the Dutch have invented an imaginary bike lane than meanders wherever they feel like going. So come on Spain, think again. By all means make it safe for the cyclist, but not at the expense of pedestrians, young and old. Tony McCarthy Albir

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Email letters to rtnmail@roundtownnews.com with your full name and address

Email: rtnmail@roundtownnews.com

Don’t let this happen to you THIS IS a true, sad story that could happen to any of us here. My wife’s cousin has died and although she was intelligent, born in Spain and had made her will, her flat, investments and life savings are going to be ‘lost’ because she kept all the details secret. Aurora preferred to live alone: a solitary existence, with no children and even her brothers and sisters had all passed away. It was only after concerned neighbours called the police that they broke into her flat and found her remains. Not knowing the details of any Will, we decided to apply ourselves for the death certificate and to the Registro General de Actos de Ultima Voluntad. The documents duly arrived and we now had a list of each Will she made including the date, Notary and the town where he practiced. Using the final date we contacted the Notary and he explained that if we could prove who we were, our relationship to the deceased, and if our name appeared he would officially open the Will. However, he warned that as a Will is private and confidential he could not disclose anything if we were not included. The final result was that our names did not appear, nor our children or our children’s children!

Two years have now passed and nobody has come forward to claim their inheritance: we don’t have access to the flat, correspondence or her bank accounts. We have never seen a copy of her Will and we don’t even know the name of the beneficiary – and nobody seems to care! We assume the bank is paying the standing orders and will continue to do so until the money runs out! However, this will be quicker than you may imagine and few people realise that after six months if a property is not registered in the new owner’s name, a fine is imposed at the rate of 5% of the property value. After a further three months this rises to 10% and so on until it reaches 50%! There is a moral to this tale – don’t let this happen to you: 1. Make your own Spanish Will 2. Tell the people who will benefit 3. Advise them to obtain their DNI now to save time (you don’t have to be a resident to do this) 4. Give them a copy of the Will or give one to a close friend, but make sure they have the relevant address and phone numbersT. Mitchell * For further information relating ot making a will please turn to page 31.

People should be aware NOT USUALLY one to write to the editor of a newspaper, I have been following the situation in Bahrain. Many people may not even be aware of the torture, destruction and deaths that are taking place there. And, why is this? It is because Western TV has been silent about what is going on. You have to watch alternative news programmes such as Press TV and Al Jazeira TV or the internet to see and hear of the atrocities. Amnesty international has called for all detained anti-regime protesters to be freed, but watching UK TV, we are informed of events in Libya and Syria, but nothing about Bahrain. Why is this?

Let me explain IN REPLY to John Thompson’s criticism of me I would like to do some explaining. The letter published was intended as a personal message to Noel Eastwell. When I saw that it had been printed I wrote to him asking for an apology to be published. I have not seen the apology, yet. My views, although some of our members apparently agree with them, are my personal opinions. How dare you suggest that I, or any other member of

The on-going events there are far worse, as the Bahraini government has invited another country, Saudi Arabia, to its borders to attack its own people who are peacefully protesting. Indeed, Saudi Arabia has its own uprising taking place which is also not reported. More Saudi troops crossed into Bahrain on Thursday, 5th May in advance of a call by anti-regime protestors for a massive protest to take place. Arrests have taken place of hospital staff treating protestors; prisoners are tortured, some to death; mosques and holy sites have been destroyed and emergency rule is being used to try civilians in

military courts. Still nothing on Sky or the BBC! Some activists have died in detention and others are being sentenced to death. An ex-Bahraini opposition MP has died in hospital today after being detained by regime forces. Human rights are being violated daily and we hear nothing! It is questionable why western countries are silent on this issue – what will be the fate of the protestors – Bahraini people will continue to resist against this widespread persecution from what they believe to be a criminal and repressive regime. Will we ever hear about it on UK news?

A true angel I AM writing to express my sincere appreciation for all the help HAH have given us. My 91-year-old mother, Iris Everett, came to live with us in February 2011. She has suffered with ulcers and infections on both her legs over the past two years. On her arrival I asked for help from HAH with the dressing of her legs. Without hesitation arrangements were made for a nurse to call and assess the situation. Initially Helen called a couple of times ... she was lovely ... kind and friendly. As Helen was not the nurse for our area, Lynda began visiting. She was confident she could improve Mum’s legs drastically; I was not so sure because of all the problems we’d had in the UK. However, week on week, Mum’s legs improved immensely and she would have been able to do without her bandages had it not been for the fall she had causing the bandage to graze her leg: I have never seen her legs looking so good. When Lynda visits it’s like having a really good friend call. She has a brilliant sense of humour, is kind, patient and attentive with Mum and you never feel time is an issue with her. Lynda also takes an interest in the family as a whole and is always eager to help with any problems we may have with Mum, who suffers with dementia. Lynda is a true angel and will be greatly missed when she no longer needs to call. Many thanks for all your help and good luck & best wishes for the future of HAH Jackie and Bobby Sutherland

Eurogolf, treat the staff with anything less than respect; we are all adults and act like adults. Why should we want to leave La Marquesa? The point of my letter was that the majority of clubs that I have played at in Spain have the same attitude and they may bend over backwards initially to welcome us, but we would expect that to change when we were established. One of the highest considerations of our society is speed of play. For that reason the society supplies its own marshals at every meeting. Finally I never compared prices in Spain to South Africa, Zimbabwe, Philippines or any of the other countries in which I have played: I compared the service. Brian Green

Got a story? 902 118 999

rtnmail@roundtownnews.com

13 - 19 may 2011

How to vote in the Spanish municipal elections by Patricia Thompson ON SUNDAY 22nd May 2011, elections for both local councils as well as autonomous regional governments will take place all over the country. As a non-Spanish voter, you are entitled to vote for those who will represent you in your local town hall, provided that you are registered on the municipal census (padrón) and on the voting register. Non-Spanish nationals are NOT entitled to participate in the autonomous community (regional government) elections, only the municipal elections. On 22nd May, local schools and certain municipal premises will be converted into polling stations and will be open to voters from 9am through to 8pm. It should be noted that the method of voting may be DIFFERENT in Spain to your home country! It is important to know HOW TO VOTE as your vote could well become void if the correct procedure is not followed. In Spain, a person votes for the particular political party, not for a particular person or area (ward) representative. Each political party presents a list of their candidates. The list will include the same number of candidates as there are seats on the local council, with three ‘spares’. (In Torrevieja, for instance, there will be a total of 27 seats on the local council and each political party will produce their own list of the 27 (plus 3 spares). The voting slip for municipal elections is the WHITE voting slip. This white slip is the only one which a non-Spanish voter is entitled to use. The pink coloured slips are for the autonomous community elections in which only Spanish nationals can vote. Generally, the first name on the municipal (white) list will become Mayor of the town should that particular political party win the most seats. WHAT TO DO ON VOTING DAY Your polling station will, most likely, be the school or municipal premises designated for that purpose for the day, which is nearest to your home. You should attend there at any time between 9am and 8pm: the voting procedure should only take a few minutes. Take with you a recognised, official form

of identity which includes a photograph of yourself, for example a passport, driving licence, residents’ or national identity card. On a table inside the polling station, you will find a number of piles of voting slips, one pile for each political party. The voting slips for the municipal elections are WHITE. This is the ONLY voting slip you can use. TAKE CARE to ensure that you only pick up the voting slip for the party you wish to vote for. Study the slip to ensure it is the correct party. (Probably, you will already have decided and will recognise the name, initial, and ‘logo’). Take ONE voting slip of the party for which you wish to vote. (i.e. a white coloured paper with the name of the political party, the ‘logo’ of that party and a list of the names of their candidates). DO NOT MARK THE VOTING SLIP IN ANY WAY AT ALL. The placing of a cross or any other mark on the paper will result in your vote becoming VOID! Place the UNMARKED, WHITE voting slip in the WHITE coloured envelope provided. (You will find a pile of envelopes next to the voting slips). Report to the voting desk and produce your identity document – your name will be checked to ensure that it is included in the voters register for that particular polling station. When you are told, PLACE THE ENVELOPE containing your UNMARKED voting slip, into the transparent urn on the presidential table. During the run-up to the election you may well receive, either through the post or given to you by one of the local political parties, an envelope containing a voting slip. MAKE SURE that the slip is for the POLITICAL PARTY THAT YOU WISH TO VOTE FOR. If this is the case, you only need to take your envelope and slip along to the polling station on the day. Ensure that neither the voting slip, nor the envelope are marked in any way. ONLY UNMARKED VOTING PAPERS WILL BE ACCEPTABLE at the final count! As a resident in Spain, you have a RIGHT to decide which political party will run your local council for the next four years. Make sure that you USE YOUR RIGHT TO VOTE!

Thieves of manhole covers nabbed in Calpe By Jan Gamm TWO MEN have been arrested for stealing more than one hundred municipal manhole covers and gratings from the

Manholes were stolen in Calpe

Calpe municipal warehouse in Rafoll. The manhole covers are estimated by the council to be worth approximately 60€ each, making a total haul of around 6,000€. The culprits are both Spanish and residents of Benidorm, aged 22 and 35 respectively. They failed to consider the weight of the manhole covers and were spotted by police on Wednesday in a severely overloaded getaway vehicle. They were subsequently taken in for questioning by officers of the Guardia Civil.

Couple arrested for attempting to sell baby A SPANISH couple, as yet unnamed by police, has been arrested for attempting to sell a fivemonth-old baby girl on the streets of Alcantarilla, a small town seven kilometres from Murcia. They approached at least four different women with a proposition to sell the baby for the amount of 5,000€. The couple left their telephone number with the women, one of whom reported the incident to the police, enabling them to perform a trace. It was later confirmed that the child was the couple’s own daughter. The child has now been placed under the care of the child protection authorities pending further investigation.

13 - 19 may 2011

Victims of the Civil War Drastic steps to not to be exhumed at develop an effective HIV vaccine now Valley of the Fallen under revision by Jan Gamm

THE SPANISH government has made a decision not to exhume the remains of the 30,000 Spanish Civil War victims entombed at the Valle de los Caidos (Valley of the Fallen), General Franco’s mausoleum near Madrid. A dozen families of victims from the Republican side of the conflict had expressed a wish to move their relatives’ remains to an alternative place of interment. However, studies com-

missioned by the Spanish government have revealed that it would not be possible to accurately identify the severely decomposed bones for re-burial. The Valle de los Caidos contains remains of victims from both sides of the conflict and features a 500 foot cross set over a basilica hewn from the living rock. The government is now considering whether to exhume the remains of the dictator himself, for re-burial alongside his wife, Doña María del Carmen Polo.

By Jan Gamm IN FEBRUARY it was announced by the Catalan AIDS Vaccine Research Project of the Hospital Clinic of Barcelona that Spain had developed a vaccine that decreases the presence of AIDS in patients. However, it does not completely remove the virus and the AIDS problem has become so grave that a programme of ‘adaptive’ design is being debated by researchers. A vaccine for HIV is now vital to stem the decline of life expectancy in certain World communities such as Zimbabwe, where in 1990 the average life expectancy was 62.4 years yet by 2006 had reduced to 34 years for women and 37 years for men. The proposed programme of research involves short terms results being sought and discarded in early trials if found ineffective, without waiting for long term effects to be analysed. A combination of antiviral drugs has succeeded in reducing the death rate in developed countries but treatment is costly, difficult to maintain long term and there is always an imminent danger of certain strains of HIV becoming resistant to the drugs.

Child sex abuser gets 14 years behind bars The Valley of the Fallen

A MAN found guilty of sexually abusing an 11-year-old girl at her home in Jávea in 1999 has finally been sentenced to 14 years imprisonment. The man worked as a gardener at the girl’s home and the girl went to help him water the plants in the garden, which is when the attack occurred.

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The poetry of colour by Jack Troughton EDUCATIONAL AND fun, Lynda Jane Smith’s book ‘Colour In My World’ appeals to all ages and is reaching out to all corners of the world. Lynda targeted a nine to 12-year-old age group when she first began writing but soon discovered it delighted children and adults alike. She said: “Since then younger and older children have read it, grandparents and parents have read it – it is difficult to put an age on the book – but how can you put an age on colour?” Colour In My World is the first book by the colour and image consultant, also a talented hair and make-up artist, and she believes it is a key to helping people unlock their creativity and understand the power of colour. Full of activities, facts and even poetry, the Javea-based author also believes it has a very practical side in helping people find colours that suit them – and is already helping international readers learn English. “People like the poems and it is educational but not boring because there are lots of creative things to do,” she added.

grandparents shop for clothes that suit demanding youngsters. “If adults buy clothes and kids don’t like the colours they put their feet down and just won’t wear them but the book helps families learn about colour together,” she said. “It is all fun and it is empowering children and getting them to feel confident in their own colours – everyone has different coloured eyes, skin and hair.” Linda hopes her book – she is planning a second – will become a success in schools. Colour In My World has already become well travelled – copies have been taken to Australia, New Zealand and Zimbabwe. It is available from www.authorhouse.co.uk, Amazon, Waterstones, Bookworld Javea, and leading stores. For more information, visit www.colourinmyworld.com

Ready for the chase

by Jack Troughton A SUCCESSFUL treasure hunt across the Marina Alta failed to outfox almost 50 members of the Royal Air Force Association and their guests. More than three hours of frantic searching took people around Moraira, Calpe and the Jalon Valley – taking in historic back streets and country lanes. Everyone met up at the end to enjoy lunch at the El Nou Portet Restaurant near Orba where everyone was able to share clues and their adventures. Anyone interested in joining the North Costa Blanca Branch of RAFA can call 96 574 3439 or visit www.rafa-ncb. org for more information.

U3A to talk to Calpe Christian Fellowship Ladies Friendship Group

RAINBOW Many a schoolroom once rang to the adage ‘Richard Of York Gave Battle In Vain’ as an aid to learning the colours of the rainbow. Lynda suggests making up individual prompts – for example: ‘Riding On Your Granny’s Bike In Venice.’. And Linda said there was a practical side – helping kids choose clothes in colours they want to wear and helping parents and

On the hunt

Lynda Jane Smith

PAT SPENCER from the U3A is to give a talk on Action Aid to the Ladies Friendship Group of the Calpe Christian Fellowship, outlining her experiences during her visit to the slums of Calcutta. The talk will take place on Thursday, 2nd June at 12.00 noon at the Perlamar Centre, Calpe and all ladies are welcome

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Step aboard the Bassibus!

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by Jan Gamm

Tour passengers, pictured outside the PP headquarters, each received a suit cover

AN ORGANISED bus tour of the main points in the Gürtel corruption scandal involving the President of the Valencian Community, Franscisco Camps, has been staged in Madrid by comedian Leo Bassi. “Here lives the people who run Spain,” ran the commentary of the controversial actor, as the buses rolled past large golf courses. “We’re not doing anything illegal…!” he assured his amused audience at the culmination of the tour route, outside the party headquarters of the Partido Popular. Highlights of the tongue-in-cheek organised protest tour included expensive shops and restaurants - the meeting venues of the alleged scams of the principal players in the corruption case that continues to rock the Valencian community. SUIT COVERS And the two busloads of tour participants received complimentary travel sickness bags (labelled ‘ideological sickness’) chocolate euros; and a free suit cover marking the alleged ‘gift’ of a wardrobe of expensive clothes given to Franscisco Camps by the tailor implicated in the case. The remarks of passers-by included “hilarious,” “surreal” and “typical of Spain.”

Candlelight causes fire in Albatera

A 34-year-old North African man whose third floor apartment was burned in the early hours of Wednesday morning in Albatera, Alicante, blames the accident on the lack of electricity after his power supply was cut off, forcing him to use candles for light. The fire forced evacuation of three other families in the bulding but they were able to return home shortly afterward. Nobody was injured.

Local teacher runs for Mayor IT IS not just the large Spanish towns that are going to the Polls on Sunday 22rd May. Municipal elections are happening all across the width and breadth of Spain and in the small town of Jesús Pobre (near Denia) Sebastian Aguilla is standing as the BLOC candidate for Mayor. Sebastian, who is a teacher at the local primary school and lives in the village with his family, is running with two BLOC party colleagues Ma Rosa Costa and Josep Lluís Fornés. Sebastian and his colleagues are presenting their ‘Presentació Candidatura’ at the Jesús Pobre Town Hall today (Friday) at 8pm, and a running on a ticket of ‘A Better Town to Live In”

Sebastian Aguilla and his two running mates

which involves 38 different initiatives such as improving the Heathcare Centre, enlarging the Library, better control of the hours and noise from building works going on in the village, providing more access to the Internet, and improving the recreational zones. If you have registered

on the padrón and so are entitled to vote, meetings such as this are a vital way to learn what each party proposes for your town for the coming four years, and especially for Expats attending such meetings, to help us with the important decision: for whom to cast our vote.

“We are mo

re t h an j u

st a v oice on the phone”

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Old favourites Once again the Spanish news is dominated this week by a number of old favourites: ETA, Corruption, Domestic Violence, Tourism, Smoking, and China all make a welcome return, along with a classic ‘Typically Spanish’ story, but more on that later. It was certainly encouraging to read recently that a new guide of resources available to women who suffer from domestic violence has been published by the British Consulate in Alicante, with information in English on helplines and emergency phone numbers, plus contact details for victim support offices, but, and I don’t want to sound disparaging here, it is hard not to feel that it is still very much a case of ‘too little, too late’. Look at these recent stories, all from the last week: A young woman who was attacked by her boyfriend has been admitted to intensive care in La Ribera district hospital in Alzira, Valencia with stab-wounds to her stomach and chest. The victim was knifed in her home by her former partner in front of their five-year-old son. A thirty year old woman from Almeria has become the latest victim of domestic violence, stabbed twenty times by her former partner.

When police arrived on the scene they found the lifeless body of the woman on the street and the murder weapon next to her body. Police and firemen entering a house in calle Ascensión Bielsa in the Puente de Vallecas district of Madrid found the decapitated body of a forty year old woman. The husband, who had tried to commit suicide, was also discovered in the house. These victims are either dead or in intensive care, so I suspect that a helpline and a few brochures aren’t going to be that much use to them. On a more positive note the court in Motril recently expelled a Moroccan man from Spain for ten years, on charges of domestic violence. The court had earlier handed down a year’s jail sentence on the accused, placed a 500m distancing order against him, and ordered him to pay compensation of 155 €, and when that didn’t deter him took more drastic action. On a more cheerful note, according to the Ministry for Development there are going to be 7.4% more seats on flights to Spain this year, and that so far this year more than 40 million travellers have passed through Spanish airports in the first three months of the year. But ... before you all go rejoicing, British

and German owners of property in Spain came to visit less with the fall in the number of Britons with a second home being 17% and in the case of the Germans 11%. Remember I have written before about the steady takeover of Spain by the Chinese? Yet more evidence as China’s fourth-biggest airline group, HNA Group, has bought a 20-percent stake in leading Spanish hotel chain NH Hoteles for 431.6€ million. What was of more interest though was that it was also announced that the two firms will set up a joint venture for the development of a chain of four-star hotels in China, one of the world’s fastest-growing tourism markets. This is all part of China’s plan to develop its own tourist market as only as recently as 2000 it received just eight million visitors, but will become the World’s most visited country in 2020, according to the United Nations World Tourism Organisation. The country replaced Spain last year as the World’s third most visited country behind France and the United States. It received 55.98 million international arrivals in 2010; a 10% increase over the previous year. So Spain is forg-

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ing an alliance, or is that a dependence, on a country with a stated aim of competing for the same tourist business. It will all end in tears... And finally ...... only in Spain! A drunk driver has been acquitted in Spain because of the skill with which he fled the police. It happened in Murcia last month where the driver refused to stop for a roadside alcohol test, jumped red lights and skidded on the curves but he did so ‘driving skilfully at speed’. When he was finally caught he gave a level of 0.45 grams of alcohol per litre of blood. While he was initially convicted, the judges in the higher court considered the sentence was ‘absurd’ because it made no sense that if he was drunk, how was he capable of controlling a vehicle at great speed and even making handbrake turns? Chris runs an expat blog about life in Spain (www.almerimarlife.com) and is a regular contributor to a number of publications and radio stations in Spain, as well as writing a monthly column for the Telegraph Expat site and is a Telegraph Expat guest blogger. He lives in Almerimar with his wife Sands, four cats, two Harleys and more often than not a glass of red.

Views from a balcony is sponsored by Central Contracts (www.centralcontracts.com) a leading car leasing company supplying cars and vans to business users and private individuals. See also http://almerimarlife.com/expat-technology-blog chris@almermarlife.com Social Networks: Twitter - Facebook - Facebook Group

13 - 19 may 2011

Essential Spanish lesson Spanish lessons by

Jane Cronin

A weekly ‘cut out and keep’ feature helping you to learn basic Spanish for everyday needs

Lesson 157

As promised, or threatened, depending on the way you look at it, we are now on to the Past Simple tense, otherwise known as the Past Historic, or the “pretérito”. I’m always very honest about what things in the Spanish language are easy and what things are difficult. This tense in Spanish is easyish at the beginning because the basic idea of when we use it is clear, but the endings do take a bit of getting used to. Unfortunately, there is also a fair range of irregular verbs and in addition some tricky differences between when we use this tense and when we use the descriptive past tense. Apart from that – it’s a walkover, rather like falling off a log, although I have never done this and it always sounds rather painful to me. Anyway, the idea of this article is not to teach the tense all over again, but to give you a little test of your knowledge. We are now actually revising articles 98 to 108 which can be found on my website in the RTN articles section. Well, there’s nothing like a bit of conjugation to get us in the mood, so first of all, fill in the gaps in these three tables. Try to do it from your head rather copying it from your verb book, which is basically cheating. Also, you might start a sneezing fit from all that dust that flies off it when you move it. Miré -I looked -you looked (familiar) Miró -he, she looked - you looked (formal) Miramos -we looked

-you looked (familiar plural) -they looked. Bebiste - I drank -you drank -he/she drank -we drank bebisteis-you drank (plural) bebieron-they drank Viví -I lived Viviste -you lived Vivió -he/she lived vivimos -we lived vivisteis -you lived (plu) -they lived (One point each – 10 points in total)

There is another minor spelling change in the third person of these verbs. He fell _________ they fell ____________ (caerse) She read _________ they read ___________ (leer) He heard __________they heard __________ (oír) (1 point each – 10 points in total) Now we will look at a few verbs that make root changes in the third person. For example: Murió – (he died) murieron (they died) Siguió – (she followed) siguieron (they followed)

These are of course completely standard, regular verbs in the past simple tense. Now see if you can do the same with these verbs: Ayudar, cambiar, cocinar, comprar, escuchar, pensar, trabajar, viajar, aprender, comer, conocer, entender, abrir, decidir, recibir, salir. (3 points for each conjugation - 24 points in total) There are a few more of these verbs which, although regular, contain some spelling adjustments to reflect the pronunciation. See if you can work out how the following should be spelt: I paid ____________________ (pagar) I looked for _______________ (buscar) I played __________________ (jugar) I started __________________(empezar)

E-books take off in Spain A STUDY by the Ministry of Culture has revealed that the publication of electronic books (e-books) has increased

Write down the third persons singular and plural of these verbs: Sentirse, dormir, pedir, repetir, conseguir. (1 point each – 10 points in total). Finally, see how you get on with translating this into Spanish. It’s a bit of a challenge, but all the verbs and regular – good luck! Yesterday I got up (levantarse) at half past seven. I had a shower (ducharse) and then I had tea and cereal for breakfast (desayunar). I took (llevar) my daughters to secondary school and started (empezar) work. I worked (trabajar) a lot of hours but between classes I had (tomar) a coffee. In the afternoon I went for a walk (pasear) in the centre of San Pedro and had dinner (cenar) at home. I went to bed (acostarse) early in order to go to work the following day. And you? What time did you get up (levantarse)? (This is worth a lot of points – let’s say 30 in total.) Answers next week!

by 50% since last year. The Culture Ministry believes the statistics are proof that electronic literature will become the ‘face of power’ in the publishing world. The highest increase is in the subject of Science and Technology, at 17.7%. 94% of the books were published in Spanish.

Seve dies: the passing of a golfing legend By Jan Gamm THE WORLD golfing community is in mourning following the death of icon Seve Ballesteros. Seve lost his brave battle with brain cancer last Saturday after undergoing four operations and a regime of chemotherapy. On Friday, 54-yearold Ballesteros’ family reported from his home in northern Spain that his condition had deteriorated dramatically and his death was announced the following morning. Winner of 87 titles, including three British Opens and two Masters, Seve Ballesteros was acknowledged as golf’s

greatest shot maker; a major influence in the golfing fraternity and well loved by all who were privileged to compete alongside him. Fellow Spaniards José-Maria Olazabel and Miguel Angel Jiménez openly wept at the Spanish Open in Barcelona on hearing the news of his imminent passing. A funeral on Wednesday was attended by a number of golfing celebrities including Lee Westwood, Sam Torrance and Nick Faldo, as well as President of Madrid Esperanza Aguirre, and the new Secretary of State for Sport, Albert Soler. The service was shown on three giant screens set up

outside the church. “What can you say about Seve…he was a legend; an icon; and everything that is good about European golf: a true World superstar,” said RTN’s golfing guru Noel Eastwell. Ballesteros’ ashes were

Seve Ballesteros

taken to his home in Pedrena, to be scattered beneath the Magnolia tree in his garden according to his wishes. The house overlooks the beach where as a boy Seve practised hitting pebbles with a wooden-shafted 3 iron.

legal

13 - 19 may 2011

The taxes and fees on property sales by

Michael Olmer Solicitor, Link Point Legal and Business Services

IF YOU are selling your property in Spain you need to be aware of the taxes and fees that may take a hefty bite out of the sale price. A tax that is unfamiliar to Anglo-Saxon homeowners is the ‘Plus Valia’ tax. This is a local ‘capital gains’ tax charged on the increase in the value of the land on which Urban property is sited, during the period you have owned it. It is charged not only on the sale of a property, but also if the property is the subject of an inheritance, if it is transferred in some other way. It is important to realise that the tax is charged on land alone, not on the buildings that may stand on the land, and it is not charged on land that is officially classed as ‘rustic’. The rates of tax are set by each municipality and can vary widely from one district to another. The tax is based on the increase in the official, that is to say the ‘Catastral’, value of the land which a property occupies. This is the same value that is used to set your local property tax or ‘IBI’ and can be found on the bill for your ‘IBI’ issued by your local Ayuntamiento each year and is shown as the ‘valor del suelo’. The actual price at which a property changes hands, or the value attributed to it if is the subject of a gift or inheritance is irrelevant. On a sale of a property it is the responsibility of the

seller to pay the tax, but if the seller fails to pay it this responsibility may be passed to the buyer. If you are putting your property on the market it is a good idea to ask your local town hall or local tax agency such as SUMA to calculate the amount of the Plusvalia before you find a buyer, to help you with your budgeting. If you are selling an individual house which stands on a large plot which you have owned for a considerable length of time the amount of the Plusvalia Tax could be many thousands of Euros. On the other hand, as the tax is charged on the value of land alone, the amount of Plusvalia Tax charged on a flat in a block which you have not owned for very long the tax may be quite modest. If the property is being inherited or is the subject of some other type of gift, it is the beneficiary or recipient of the property liable to pay the tax. Certain transactions are exempt from the Plusvalia Tax, the main ones being the transfer of property between spouses who are divorcing, or to children to comply with Court judgments. You will also be responsible for paying the national Capital Gains Tax on the increase in the value of property as a whole – both land and buildings – during the time you have owned it. If you have not been resident in Spain for tax purposes, which broadly speaking means that you

have been paying Spanish income tax, the Notary who must deal with your sale must retain 3% of the total sale price you receive as security for this tax. You must then submit tax form 211 to officially account for the precise amount of tax and pay any excess that may be due, or if any refund is due to you reclaim it using tax form 212. Again, if you have not been fiscally resident in Spain, it is important to budget for the retention of 3% of the price by the Notary. If your property is subject to a mortgage, normally this is repaid on a sale, although in certain situations, a buyer may take over the mortgage outstanding on a property. There will be fees due to the Notary and Land Registry fees for the cancellation of your mortgage in addition to any charge that your bank may make for dealing with the repayment or transfer of the mortgage to the buyer. All of these fees and taxes must be budgeted for and if you are in the unfortunate position of being on the margins of ‘negative equity’ it may actually cost you money to sell your property. If you need help in budgeting for the sale of your property please contact us to try and avoid any unpleasant surprises, but also possibly find ways of saving money or reclaiming any tax that may be charged.

Calle Andromeda 24, 03581 Albir - Alfaz del Pí, Alicante. Email: client@linkpointlegal.com Web: www.linkpointlegal.com Tel: 96 626 0500 Fax: 96 686 52 77

13 - 19 may 2011

money

Suzanne O’Connell Customer Care at Ábaco

Stop putting it off: make that will! WHAT IS always on the bottom of your list of to-dos? We’ve all got them. Those tasks which aren’t going to go away but we just can’t manage to persuade ourselves to do, just yet. There’s usually an excuse. We’re too busy, haven’t enough money, the sun’s out, the sky is blue, something that means we procrastinate. On my list at the moment is getting the car serviced (not enough money), sorting out my summer clothes from winter (too busy and haven’t enough summer ones yet) and making a Spanish will. The trouble is that putting off the first two isn’t such a big issue. I should get the car serviced and I will eventually but in the meantime it does run okay and there aren’t any flashing lights on the dash board… yet. But the will is another matter entirely. I suppose it’s a case of when do you own up to the fact that you’re not getting any younger and there is only one certainty in life? I should know better. At Abaco I am writing every day about inheritance tax, the importance of making a Spanish will and problems that it can

cause your inheritors if you don’t. Ignorance is not an excuse for me. I know that inheritance tax in Spain must be paid before the title deed is registered in the heir’s name and that bank accounts can be frozen. I know that you don’t automatically pass down your property to your next of kin, even when you are married to them. I also know that making a will can help you make sure that your inheritors pay as little as possible in inheritance tax. Like everyone, I want to do the best I can for those I leave behind. So what’s stopping me? I have the resolve, I have the reason. Instead of telling other people why they should make a Spanish will it really is time I made one myself. In fact, I’ll do it now. Trouble is, I’ve run out of time writing this article. I’ll just add it to my to-dos for tomorrow instead… For more information on Spanish Wills and Inheritance call the Ábaco Helpline (00 34) 96 670 3748. Friendly British staff will answer your queries, free of charge with no obligation.

“If you would like a FREE, no obligation tax consultation and help with completing your annual tax declaration contact one of Ábaco’s friendly team on ÁbacoConnect Help-line 966 703 748 | www.abacoconnect.com”

Tel: 96 558 7633 M obile 61820473 1

•QROPS Pension Transfers •Inheritance Tax Planning •Retirement Planning •Life Assurance

•Mortgages •Currency Exchange •Funeral Plans

Baskerville Advisers S.L. CIF B-63/137.020; Correduria de Seguros; No. de registro RDGS J2306; Seguro responsabilidad civil AIG Europe No. 0131900503.1330; Registro Mercantil de Barcelona, Tomo 35489, Folio 170, Seccion 8, Hoja B-269534

13 - 19 may 2011

Spain’s deficit targets on course CREDIT AGENCY Moody’s announced on Monday that Spain’s credit rating is unlikely to be affected by rising funding costs driven by market fears of Greek debt restructuring. The country is said to be on course to meet this year’s deficit targets, with no concerns that Spain’s Aa2 rating will be changed amid the euro zone’s debt crisis.

Tax refunds for 2010 THE SECOND Deputy Prime Minister and Minister for Economy and Finance, Elena Salgado, announced on Wednesday that the Treasury has paid out more than €920 million to 1,350,000 taxpayers with an entitlement to refunds on their tax returns for 2010, representing more than 64% of refund applications.

business

13 - 19 may 2011

Karla Darocas

Information Technology & Communications

Going Green is the best business model to rock the recession NO MATTER which way you turn, businesses that at one time boomed have now gone bust as the economy crisis continues to drag on. However, there are ventures that are glowing and growing and their colour is green!

Businesses that are built on friendly service relationships that can help customers find value and save money are the types of businesses that really rock during a recession. When you add the element of ‘recycling’ to the business mix you then have a green, sustainable enterprise. Moraira resident Louise Rowlands is one of the Costa Blanca’s hardest working moms. Not only does she hold down a regular restaurant job, but she also reaches out to her community in order to recycle ‘ropas’. Louise is a new generation of mothers doing everything they can to save the environment and make the planet a better place. “We recycle everything at home and at work (in the restaurant) including glass, paper and plastic,” explains the busy mother and wife. “We also do a lot of our shopping online to reduce our carbon footprint.” Louise learned about the art of recycling clothes by first working in a dress agency. “People would come into the dress agency and bring their new or nearly new clothes. Why? Perhaps their clothes were bought as a gift or their clothes

had shrunk or just didn’t fit anymore,” describes Louise. “Anyway, I thought that this was an excellent way of recycling clothes without wasting them or putting them in the rubbish bin. It was also way to generate some earnings both for the customer and for my family.” Louise has also taken more steps towards being a greener citizen by allowing her clients to view these recycled clothes on the web, hence saving shoppers even more money and time. She acknowledges that she uses Facebook, Blogs and Recycling websites like CBbuy-sell.com to sell to her customer. “All of these online sites have been fantastic selling tools for me.” More and more consumers are waking up to the realisation that by shopping online they are both saving gas and time and they are helping to minimise carbon footprint and air pollution. “I really love to shop online,” she concludes. “I even buy my food online and recently I got my boss involved by doing the same for the restaurant.” Louise spreads her love of recycling to her son as she tries to teach him about the value of saving the planet. “Although he is only small at the moment, the more he understands about recycling and living a greener life the better life he will have in the future and for his family. In the house, we always involve him in recycling. When we take out the rubbish down to the

Karla Darocas * Business Communications Software Training & Computer Repairs *Helping You to Help Yourself 965 973 234.

bin, we separate everything. He then will put all the plastic in one bin, glass in one and paper in another. Also he sees that Nanny and Grandad have a compost bin in which they put all of their organic waste and my son will help them with this too! In conclusion, we all can think of ‘green’ business ideas that will help the plant and help our economy.

money

13 - 19 may 2011

QROPS - the realities of giving and receiving advice by

Stephen Ward & Robert Burns IT WOULD be interesting to know how many column miles have been devoted to QROPS over the last few years. As a concept it has captured the imagination of advisers. Unfortunately, this often includes those who know so little about UK pension law that any so called advice they give may be considered dangerous. Many of the latter, though, recognise that the entire area of pension transfer advice (whether to a QROPS or not) is a specialist field and should be accompanied by substantive technical knowledge of how the UK pension system works and knowledge of how the pensions system works in the various jurisdictions where QROPS are to be found. Advisers in this category are open minded enough to introduce their QROPS enquiries to us and we thank them for trusting us to assist with their clients. Claims of offering access to all QROPS are just plain silly There are thousands of them and most are in jurisdictions which only open their door to local residents. So for example

although a resident of Spain may transfer their UK pension fund to a QROPS in Guernsey, New Zealand, Isle of Man or Malta, they cannot transfer to a QROPS in Jersey or Australia. In fact only a tiny proportion of all QROPS are ‘open’ to the public at large. The real choice is from less than perhaps 100 schemes not from the entirety of the contents of the QROPS list maintained by HMRC.

comprise, any guarantees that apply together with the current transfer value and any cost of transferring. It should then set out the comparative benefits you can expect to receive on a transfer to a QROPS and how those benefit opportunities compare with those associated with your UK pension rights. This should be capable of being explained to you in language you understand.

Transparency of costs and references If you are receiving advice on QROPS always ask for and accept nothing less than transparency as to costs. Be suspicious of anything being free of charge because it will not be - instead there will be a huge and undisclosed commission lurking somewhere. The advice you receive needs to be paid for as does the QROPS provider, but you have a moral right to know to the penny what those costs are. Think about asking for a reference from another client who has used the adviser’s services on a transfer to a QROPS: if this is not forthcoming then vote with your feet. Ask the adviser to confirm the level of their pension qualifications - a generalist financial services qualification will not suffice.

ASK THE SPECIALISTS - PREMIER PENSION SOLUTIONS If you do not understand in detail what the adviser is telling you this is more than likely because he does not understand it himself. And if you ask any question of the adviser which he cannot answer but has to go away and ask a specialist - then show them the door and come to the specialists – Premier Pension Solutions. For further information about QROPS and Pension Planning opportunities please email review@qrops.es or see http://www.prempensions.com and http://www.qrops.es

IMPORTANCE OF PROPER PENSION ADVICE We see many instances where people have transferred to a QROPS without receiving advice in writing. By that I do not mean some generic QROPS summary which makes no reference to you and your existing pension rights, but a comprehensive letter of recommendation. This should set out in clear language what your UK pension rights currently

THIS ARTICLE IS WRITTEN BY STEPHEN WARD AND ROBERT BURNS, PREMIER PENSION SOLUTIONS S.L., May 2011. Please see our advert on Page 2. At the forefront of the industry with over forty years combined experience with pensions, regulated and authorised, liaising directly with providers and HMRC, Stephen and Robert are two of the leading authorities on QROPS. E: review@qrops.es T: 965 790 918 www.qrops.es www.prempensions.com or www.qropsnz.com

legal

13 - 19 may 2011

Liabilities and rights arising from acting as guarantors by

Carlos Baos

of White & Baos Abogados English & Spanish Solicitors

A WHILE ago my daughter and her boyfriend (who have no income or assets of their own) requested and signed a credit contract at a bank for their new beauty salon. His parents and my wife and I agreed to be the guarantors for this credit contract. As my daughter and her boyfriend are not now making any repayments the bank has sent a registered letter (burofax) to my wife and me claiming for the debt. We have decided to pay in order to avoid accrued interest, court costs, expenses and legal fees etc, but the other two guarantors refuse to pay. Would it be possible for us to pay the bank and then make a claim to the parents of our daughter’s boyfriend?

Dear reader, thank you for your email. It is difficult to advise you without seeing the actual signed credit contract but in general we can state the following: Firstly, it is always unwise to sign a document without receiving legal advice or without asking the Notary to explain the legal consequences involved. Secondly, in guarantee agreements such as this it is usual that the main debtors will be your daughter and her boyfriend; and you and your wife, and the parents of your daughter’s boyfriend would sign jointly and severally as surety guarantors (fiadores solidarios) which means that the four of you (as a group) and also each one of you (as an individual) are responsible for the total amount of the debt, just as if you were the principal debtors. You should send a registered letter to every party telling them that the bank has demanded payment and that you and your wife have made the decision to pay in order to avoid accrued

interest, court costs, expenses and legal fees, etc. In regards to the main debtors (i.e. your daughter and her boyfriend) in our opinion you will be able to claim against them for any payments you make to the bank, under article 1838 of the Spanish Civil Code. Regarding the parents of your daughter’s boyfriend, in a similar way to yourselves they are likely to be joint and several cosurety guarantors, so we must take into consideration articles 1844 to 1846 of the Spanish Civil Code, which state that since all of you are guarantors of the same debtor(s) and for the same debt you will be able to claim against the other coguarantors for their portion of the debt paid by you to the bank. For you to be able to progress this matter, the Spanish Civil Code states that your payment to the creditor (in this case the bank) should be done as a consequence of a court claim received by

you or when the main debtor is bankrupt. Fortunately this requirement has now been mitigated and relaxed by the courts, and it is considered enough to receive a registered notice (even if it is not a court claim) from the creditor - since all the parties will benefit from the payment, as it is done in order to avoid further unnecessary expenses, court costs, and legal fees, etc. Thus if this is indeed the case (we would need to see the actual documents to be sure) you would be able to claim against the main debtors (your daughter and her boyfriend) for all the money that you and your wife pay, as well as against the rest of the co-guarantors (the parents of your daughter’s boyfriend) for their share of the debt. The information provided on this article is not intended to be legal advice, but merely conveys general information related to legal issues.

Marc White LL.B. & Carlos Baos (English & Spanish Solicitors) © White & Baos Abogados 2011 - All rights reserved. C/Diana 19, 2º-D, 03700 Dénia (located 1 minute away from the La Via underground car park). Tel: 966 426 185. Send your questions to spanishlawyer@roundtownnews.com or info@white-baos.com

0113- 07 - 19april may 2011

Home Garden

Brought to you by

www.spanishhomefinder.com

Trust me, I’m a government minister by

Chris Marshall

www.almerimarlife.com

LET ME see if I understand this correctly - Jose Blanco is Spain’s Development Minister, although you have every reason for never having heard of him: after all being Development Minister during a ‘crisis’ can’t exactly require too much work. I wonder exactly what he has been ‘busy’ developing? To be fair to him, he has been busy in recent weeks visiting the Spanish Embassy in London to explain to businessmen that “This is the ideal time to invest in Spanish real estate.” Apparently with 700,000 unsold holiday homes in Spain and prices having ‘fallen in real terms by more than 20 per cent on average; even more in large coastal towns’now is the time to buy. Now I tend to be a ‘half glass full’ type of person but I am struggling with this one. NOT because I don’t think people should come and live in Spain, or buy a second property for their holidays, but with the logic and dare I say ‘hypocrisy’of the situation. Broadly speaking there are 850,000 British Expats living in Spain. We know this because Blanco said so when dismissing fears over the ‘illegal property’ issue as effecting less than 1%. This is Point 1: Blanco is saying that 1% is statistically irrelevant. Now, later in his sales pitch he used the argument that Spain’s economy is showing signs of improvement: “…in the fourth quarter of 2010 Spanish GDP increased 0.6% year-on-year and the forecast for the coming months confirms this.” Now apart from the obvious: that a ‘forecast’ refers to the future and the fourth quarter of 2010 is in the past, we are

now been asked to believe that 0.6% is statistically relevant. I am going to call that Point 1.1 because Point 2 is all about timing. If we are to believe Blanco then the ‘time is right’, but this from a man that elected to pitch his presentation at the same time as the criminal complaint lodged against the Junta de Andalucía’s councillor for public works and housing by British residents of the Almanzora Valley was being thrown out by the court. You may recall that the regional councillor Josefina Cruz made these comments regards British residents in the Almanzora area of Almería who own ‘illegal properties’: “I do not know if you are defending the intrusion of people, do not know if you are defending the interests of a group of people who are not of this country, who have settled here illegally…I am concerned with the general situation, and I am not interested in the particular situation of a group of people who have settled illegally in our territory...and who are now demanding that we resolve a problem that they are responsible for creating.” Or how about the case of alleged fraud in Torremolinos Crown Court on the Costa del Sol: a 69-year-old Spanish Lawyer by the name of Jose Luis Garcia Maseda has been accused of embezzlement and fraudulently taking ‘at least €1.8m’ from a string of mostly British clients. A familiar story? Maseda, claiming to be a lawyer, financial consultant and tax advisor, convinced hundreds of clients to in-

vest their money from his Eurobrokers office in Benalmadena. “A father and son from Liverpool are among the victims, claiming that they lost €185,000 and €80,000 euros after investing in houses that were never built.” Many will argue that these are isolated cases, and they would be right. Many will argue that the statistics tell us that there are more enquiries on for property sales in Spain (and Portugal) as many investors look to snap up bargains. Again they would be right, but please don’t confuse an investor who ‘plays’ the market, knows how to take risks and accepts the occasional loss with Mr & Mrs Second Property Owner who just want a property in Spain to enjoy a few holidays and then in later life retire amongst friends. Spain is and always will be a great place for these people, and they should not be put off by the current issues, but they would do well to learn from them. As indeed would Snr Blanco. Perception is reality for many, so a word of advice: concentrate on fixing the current issues and the future will look after itself, and if you want some suggestions as to where to start: punishment of corrupt officials; reform of town planning; end of Ley de Costas; regulation of estate agents and the legal profession; enforcement of bank guarantees; compensation for victims of property scandal; judicial security; an end to land grabs ... that should keep you busy for now! Email: chris.marshall@me.com www.almerimarlife.com

Property Matters by Chris Marshall is sponsored by www.piagi.com The Currency Specialists, offering the best foreign exchange rates and currency prices. You can hear Chris each month on the weekly Property Matters show on Bay Radio Costa Almeria 91.5FM and 95.5FM ( www.bayradio.fm) with Bob James, Mondays at 4pm.

13 - 19 may 2011

Written by

Michael Taylor Style Project management Services S.L.

So what next in the crazy property market SO HERE we are getting on for the middle of 2011 and we still do not know which way the market will go: some say that it is getting better, some say the worse is still to come. If only we had a magic crystal ball we would all be sitting pretty in a year or so from now. What has happened over the last period is that the sales of resale properties have improved, what with the returning mortgage market via the banking system especially in this part of Spain and with banks very keen to secure their share of new business. This will certainly continue for some time as they will not be getting much other new business and certainly promotional mortgages are yet to return to the general market place, making the resale market even stronger for the time being. What still amazes me is the reluctance of people to recognise what they actually want in todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s market place, still wishing to view as many as 20 properties in one or two days - this surely confuses them beyond common sense and many will go back home not even remembering the first property they saw â&#x20AC;&#x201C; which was probably the one they wanted in the first place! Why do agents still insist on taking prospective buyers to so many properties, when surely the best way ahead is to discuss their needs and only show them what they really want; not what the agent thinks they want. Where does the market go from here? We have built far too many apartments for the needs of the area and too many sprawling urbanisations, yet have forgotten the first time buyers and the elderly. We need to see far more affordable homes for young married couples who cannot afford to buy at present and for those approaching retirement we need to see some quality retirement homes with in-care services. Time has come for some forward thinking from our developers and Ayumtamentosto stop looking for every Euro in profit, instead putting something back into the community for the future.

We need to see far more affordable homes for young married couples who cannot afford to buy

Giles Walker Properties. www.gileswalkerproperties.com. Tel 966 463 118. Michael Taylor Style Project management Services S.L.

Home & Garden

13 - 19 may 2011

Brought to you by spanishhomefinder.com

13 - 19 may 2011

Some spring questions by

Clodagh & Dick Handscombe Practical gardeners and authors

Are there materials other than stone chippings and tree bark that one can use for mulching around plants? Yes there are many and in view of the importance of the topic in Mediterranean gardens we will dedicate next week’s column entirely to the topic.

using plastic water bottles

PLASTIC WATER BOTTLE A reader emailed to ask ‘What were the plastic bottles for in the photograph of the mini vegetable garden balcony in the column of 22nd April?’ The larger one, one and a half litre water bottles with the bottoms cut off in front of the trellis, were being used as ‘cloches’ for tomato plants planted out at the end of January, to protect from frosts. They worked so well that we harvested tomatoes on the day we first planted tomato plants on our more exposed vegetable plot. The upturned bottles with the tops cut off were being used as cloches over carrot seedlings. By the way the photograph can be found on page 169 of Apartment Gardening Mediterranean Style. JASMINES What are the names of the three types of Jasmine one sees hanging over garden walls? If you have a copy of our book ‘Your Garden in Spain – From planning to planting and maintenance’ you will find them at the top of page 142. If not, here is the info with the Botanical, English and Spanish names in that order as in the book for all plants: Jasminum officinale, Common jasmine, Jazmin blanco comun – this is the one with white flowers.

Clodagh and Dick’s practical gardening books will be found to be useful for both experienced and new gardeners coming to Spain. The useful quartet of books can be obtained from bookshops or by email from the websites of Amazon, Santana Books, Bookworld and The Royal Horticultural Society. © Clodagh and Dick Handscombe www.gardeninginspain.com

Home & Garden

Jasminum polyanthum, Pink jasmine, Jazmin polyanthus – This is the one with pink buds that open to a white flower with a pinkish tint to the underside of the petals. Jasminum nudiflorum, winter jasmine, Jasmin Amarillo – this one has yellow flowers. We prefer the second one as it has the strongest scent but also have the other two for winter colour and the fact that Officinale repeats flowers throughout the year. Jasmine polyanthum

sulphur or in Spanish ‘Azufre poder’ in a Spanish ferreteria or garden centre.

Ants

ANTS Recent rains and sun have brought ants out. We don’t like using strong chemicals so is there an alternative? Yes and it’s cheap. A couple of euros should give you a sizeable box of yellow

Clodagh and Dick’s quartet of practical gardening books are designed to help you design, plant up and maintain a garden appropriate to the Mediterranean Style microclimate that you have in your garden or around your apartment block; gardens that are not only colourful and perfumed but also productive in terms of the number of culinary and medicinal herbs, fruits and vegetables that you can harvest. They collate their knowledge from twenty five years of gardening on the coast and in inland valleys and can be obtained from high street and internet bookshops such as Santana Books – the publishers, Bookworld, Angloinfo Spain, Amazon and the Royal Horticultural Society.

DIY tips By Steve Tanner HI TO all avid RTN readers. Let me introduce myself as your new monthly columnist and general DIY, painting and decorating expert Steve Tanner. Every month I shall be giving you hints and tips to improve your home here on the Costa Blanca. I have gathered my product knowledge and become a Master painter and decorator here in Spain over 20 years and I intend to share this knowledge with you over the coming months. Over the years, I have transformed hundreds of tired properties into bright, stylish dream homes with skill and a fine attention to detail. For my first article this month, the topic I shall be covering is ‘Iron Work Maintenance’. The article will give you all of the information needed to make a professionally finished job. As with all iron gates and metal work, these are subject to attack from local conditions. These include the heat of the sun, the humidity, and the salty atmosphere that we live in on the Costa Blanca. One of the main problems for the deteriorating finish is the lack of a proper quality primer prior to the finishing powder coat of paint. If the correct procedures are followed, this can extend the life span and protection of the iron work. So firstly, find an area you wish to repair and follow this simple step by step guide to better iron work on your property. 1. Prepare the area you wish to work on by sanding it down with a rough emery cloth texture, and finish with a fine texture cloth. This will remove any build up of rust. 2. Apply a quality primer for iron. This will seal the ironwork and give quality protection to the metal. I tend to use Titan products, as they have a guarantee

and give the best results for durability as well as price. Remember, you only get what you pay for. 3. Allow the primer to fully dry for 24 hours before applying another coat if required. A fine emery cloth can be used to remove any dust or particles prior to painting, leaving a good smooth finish. As for the painting, I use ‘Pintura Carrasco’, a reputable paint distributor. They always supply quality products. From my local Branch in San Pedro del Pinatar, I can obtain the various colour charts, and with their combined experience and knowledge, they will advise you on any points regarding the paint and preparation required. 1. When applying the initial coat of paint, be aware that surrounding areas are not painted in error, as these may be difficult to clean afterwards, i.e. Mono Capa etc. 2. A paint hardener can be used for the second coat of paint, which will allow a harder finish and seal the painted area completely. Then the second paint of coat will be the final finish to the job. The above information is a guide for longer lasting protection to metal paint work and keeping the rust at bay. We live in an area where metal is subject to erosion due to the local conditions. During the month of June, I shall be posting an article on ‘Rising Damp’ which is also a climatic condition here in Spain. If there are any enquiries or quotations required, for painting or any other small building works, please contact Steve Tanner on 671 331 696: this to include Community and private owners for interior and external works.

Oasis Garden Club

OASIS GARDEN Club once again had a wonderful day out this time to the Iris Garden near Benissa on Thursday 5th May. The 20 plus gardening enthusiasts car-shared the spectacular mountain drive to Pinos and the views were well worth seeing. The tones and hues of colour of the Iris’ were breath-taking and the many members wanting to purchase new additions for their gardens had plenty of choice. The June meeting will be a visit to the Lavender Garden in Jalon and the last meeting until September.

Minister Blanco owns illegal dwelling Minister Jose Blanco, now on an unsuccessful “Roadshow” in Europe to encourage foreigners to buy unsold and unwanted dwellings in Spain, is the owner of an illegal property on the coast of Galicia, which is situated ‘below’ the shore line. Whilst other owners in the area are threatened with demolition, the Minister’s house has been exempted. Other “exempted properties” include the summer residence of Prime Minister Zapatero in the Canary Islands, the mansion of the President of Banco Santander and Queen Fabiola’s house on the coast of Granada Province …….

Brought to you by spanishhomefinder.com

13 - 19 may 2011

Changing the language

Computing with aunty virus

Accessing Googlemail

Keith via email asks: I HAVE a Gmail account and am having trouble changing the language in the Calendar from Russian to English. I have followed Gmail’s change settings help page which does not make any difference. Also the Google forum mentions links in the top left hand side of the page? Aunty Says: Hi Keith. You can normally change all of Google’s programs via the small cog like icon in the top right corner. The top left corner is where you go to start the Calender program (along with Picassa and Translator)

When I open up Internet Explorer and click ‘Gmail’ or ‘sign in’ I get a message saying “Internet Explorer cannot open webpage”. It doesn’t matter what I try it keeps repeating the message. But if I go to my wife’s laptop, who doesn’t have Spyhunter but another similar anti threat software, I can get in straight away.

David via email asks: SOMETIMES I can’t seem to access my Googlemail and it might be as a result of adding Spyhunter4 to my PC.

Aunty Says: Hi David. I don’t know Spyhunter but I would maybe try uninstalling it from Control Panel and see if that resolves the problem. There are plenty of other free programs to protect your machine that work well with Gmail.

Helpful Losing connection Can I reinstall? Bill via email says: HI AUNTY. I just read your article in the RTN 6 May 2011 on the letter from Julie ref: logging into online banking. I had the same problem and when I contacted my banker he asked me to check the date and time setting compared to the banks setting. I did and found out the battery on my PC was going bad and would not retain the correct date and time. After changing the battery I have not had any problems. Thought this might help some. Aunty Says: I hadn’t considered that Bill and certainly worth investigating, thanks for that.

Eric via email asks: I HAVE Windows XP and do not have WiFi but I have a cable modem. I am continually losing my internet connection and I have contacted my ISP provider who has told me that there is nothing wrong with

the network. To connect to the internet I go to Network Connection, right click and select Repair, and reconnect to the Internet. This works, but eventually I lose the connection. I have run Ccleaner just in case I had a virus of some sort, but the problem still persists. Aunty Says: Hi Eric. Although Ccleaner is great for cleaning up unwanted rubbish from your computer, you need the likes of AVG2011, MalwareBytes and SuperAntiSpyware (all free) to check for virus and spyware. Yours is a typical symptom of this so do a full scan with updated versions of all three from www.download.com and you should be okay - let me know how you get on.

That’s all for this week, email me on auntyvirus@roundtownnews.com and I will do my best to sort you out

Brian from Quesada asks: I HAVE an Acer Laptop with Vista and whilst transferring a gadget from the side bar, the one that shows a continuous changing conversion of Sterling to Euros, I inadvertently placed the pointer on ‘uninstall’ and clicked and of course it disappeared. Is there anyway that it can be reinstalled? I have tried to ‘Google’ a solution but to no avail.

Aunty Says: There are a couple of ways of adding removing and changing the Windows Vista (and Win7) gadgets Brian: you can right click on a blank area of your desktop and choose ‘Gadgets’ from the popup list. If your sidebar isn’t showing then you can configure how it behaves from ‘control panel’ ‘appearance and personalisation’ and click on ‘windows sidebar properties’.

13 - 19 may 2011

GADGET INSPECTOR

the case of The Oregon Scientific Weather Station THIS WEEK the Inspector is reining in The Oregon Scientific Full Wireless Weather Station. The Oregon Scientific Weather Station offers a wide range of weather information in a compact and convenient design. The base station is located indoors, and displays all of the information gathered wirelessly from the indoor and outdoor mounted sensors on the large LCD display. The display gives current readings for indoor and outdoor temperature in °C or °F, checked every 102 seconds. Relative humidity, both inside and out, is also sampled at the same rate. There is a barometric pressure measurement, with a graph of the last 24 hours. Continuing outside, the unit also monitors wind-speed, direction and chill, UV index and rainfall. So there is going to be no problem in deciding whether you are to be soaked or fried. Now to the best, and likely to be most contentious bit – the forecasting function. This allegedly works 12-24 hours in advance and works within a 19-31 mile radius. The unit displays the predicted forecast as a symbol on the display – sunny, cloudy, rain, tsunami or relevant mixes. Whether this particular function should carry a health warning is debateable – “…that bloody thing showed it was going to be sunny and then it rained all the way round the golfcourse...” Technology is a wonderful thing. This particular model also comes complete with a wireless, floating temperature sensor. Designed for the pond, swimming pool, or jacuzzi – the temperature of the water is transmitted back to the base station. So you now never need be in doubt over the ideal bathing point again – not in the pond obviously. Now to mop up – the unit includes a clock and calendar display synchronised with time signals received by radio to guarantee accuracy. There is a dew-point detector and a moonphase indicator that displays the 8 phases of the moon for the lycanthropes amongst you. And the outdoor units will work up to 100m from the base unit, powered by batteries.

The Inspector’s Verdict: The Oregon Scientific Weather Station is a definite must-have for the weather obsessed Brit. Now where’s that slide-show of last year’s holiday … The Oregon Scientific Full Wireless Weather Station (WMR80_PD) costs around €135 direct from the manufacturer. It won’t stop your under-build flooding, but at least you may get some warning - and you’ll know when your swimming pool can be approached without an Arctic weather suit.

health

13 - 19 May 2011

Ask the Specialist by

Dr Colin Evans

MB.ChB., F.R.C.S., BDS., FDSRCS

I AM very worried about taking my children swimming in the sea as I heard lots of people talking about jellyfish last summer. What should I do in the event of a sting? Jellyfish are beautiful, fascinating creatures but sadly they can cause a lot of problems for bathers during the summer months. They have long thin tentacles covered with small poisonous sacs called nematocysts which, if they come in contact with the skin, produce

A jellyfish sting

a nasty sting. Large swarms of jellyfish have become increasingly common in the seas around Europe, such as the Mediterranean. The increase in their numbers is thought to be due to overfishing of their natural predators. If you are stung by a jellyfish, you will experience: severe pain, itching, a rash, raised welts (raised, circular areas on the skin). Other symptoms may include: nausea, vomiting, diarrhoea, abdominal pain, muscle spasms, numbness, tingling, and/or swollen lymph nodes (lymph nodes are small nodules that are found in several areas around the body, including in the groin and armpit). If available, soak in vinegar, isopropyl alcohol or failing that, sea water. Do NOT use clear water. Do NOT rub the area or apply hot water or ice. There are products available especially for jellyfish stings that you can take to the beach with you. Further medical assistance may also

be required if the symptoms of a sting are very painful and severe. Always call an ambulance if the patient has: problems breathing, or swallowing, chest pain, severe pain at the site of the sting, been stung on a large area of the body, the face, the genitals, or is in severe pain, itching, or if there is swelling around the sting, if the patient is very young, or very old. THE PORTUGUESE MAN-OF-WAR The Portuguese man-of-war is a large, poisonous, jellyfish-like creature, but it is not actually a jellyfish. As the treatments for the two species are different, it is important not to confuse them. The Portuguese man-of-war has a large, gas-filled bladder that is a purpleblue colour. It floats above the surface of the water and, like a jellyfish, has long thin tentacles that hang below the water. Being stung by a Portuguese manof-war can be extremely painful. If you come across one that has been washed up on the shore, you should NOT touch it because it can still sting you. If you, or your child, have been stung, you should seek the assistance of someone who has been trained in first aid, such as a lifeguard. If you are stung by a Portuguese

Portuguese man of war

man-of-war, you may have the following symptoms: a red line with small, white lesions in severe cases blisters and welts (raised areas) may develop. If you are stung in the eye, it is likely that you will have: eye pain, inflammation (swelling), watering eye, blurred vision, and/or increased sensitivity to light. If stung by a Portuguese man-of-war, you should seek medical attention if: the pain is severe and lasts for more than an hour, the rash gets worse, and/or there are signs of infection - such as increased redness and swelling in the affected area, and/or a high temperature (fever) of 38C (100.4F) or more.

Article written by Dr Colin Evans (MB.ChB., F.R.C.S., BDS., FDSRCS.) The English Medical Clinic, Avda del Albir, 72. Edificio Primavera, Bloque 1. ALBIR, (Alicante) 966 868 013. Email: englishmedicalclinic@gmail.com

13 - 19 May 2011

Racing ahead

Afghan Heroes Charity: Coming events

by Jack Troughton RUNNERS IN the MABS Race for Life raised more than 9,367€ for the cancer charity after pounding Marina Alta roads for 5km in the popular community event. Last month 350 people helped the MABS Cancer Support Group continue its task of helping cancer patients and their family and friends. The 3rd April fun run started at the MABS Centre in Sol Park, Moraira, went to Moraira Town Hall, and returned to the centre – runners refreshed with water supplied by Los Leones Restaurant and fortified with energy bars donated by Iceland. The money raised will be spent keeping

the centre running for its important counselling service and its ability to offer alternative treatments. MABS now has seven branches in areas between Valencia and Gibraltar. The charity is always looking for new volunteers – supporters, drivers, translators, and people willing to become a ‘buddy’. The group was started in the Marina Alta in 1999 by Jacqui Phillips MBE and others to offer advice and support to those suffering from cancer and currently helps all nationalities resident in Spain. Plans are already in place for Race for Life 2012, and organisers hope to welcome a record number of entrants.

The girls from Motive8 Gym

A BRING and Buy sale will be held at the Delfin Pub in Calpe on Saturday 4th June at 1pm, with meals available. Some table space is left at 10€ per table: Contact Marion on 664 205 835. There is a Race Night at the Delfin Pub Calpe, on 11th June, starting at 8pm, also with meals available: just turn up. Back to the 50s, 60s and 70s night at the WOK Buffet in Calpe Park! Fancy dress is optional but there will be a prize for the best dressed. Music will be supplied by Brockies Karaoke & Disco: Tickets are 12€ each and include a meal: Tickets from Fabrix, the Wok buffet or from Karen who is running the event on 697 711 266.

13 - 19 may 2011 2010 8-14 JANUARY

Anybody there? It is no secret that the dead try to communicate to us. I am not alone in saying that I have spent a large chunk of my life proving this, and providing survival evidence being, as I am, the middle man between the living energies of the here and now, and the Spirit World, where, also, there are those who wish to make communication with us here on Earth. Many who have experienced direct contact with Spirit are inspired to believe in the immortality of the soul and know, without a doubt, the ability of the dead to speak to us each and every way that they can. To attract our attention they use a variety of methods, and these are very effective and register well in our psyche. The flashing of lights and the intervention in our dreams provide portents that can and do effectively establish a great connection. The process is two sided, although the action can be started on each side. Spirit know that they can send messages that we will pick up in our dreams, and that they can plant a suggestion within us that seeks to make that vital contact between the living and the dead. The dialogue is the amazing part. What is said and done and talked about is highly essential in the reverse process of allowing the dead to speak, and to answer them with clear intention that they may better understand our reasons for doing what we do. We all sail through life making conscious choices and establishing a communication between ourselves and the World we occupy. Then when loved ones finally make their transition to another World it is only natural that we question their ability to continue in talking to us. Fear can enter at this time and stops the spiritual communication process dead in its tracks. The concept of dead people wishing to communicate becomes especially scary for some, when they feel that death has been the finality of life, bringing a silence that forms a barrier and an eternal seal of peace. Many have told me that the dead should not be disturbed, but what if they make

postbag Email your letters to me at: kennycorris@roundtownnews.com Do we become more spiritual as we get older? Faith was forced upon me when I was a child, and it meant nothing to me. Now I can see that that we need something to believe in as we approach difficult times ahead, and life changing events are closer than ever? Joan.B. Yes, Joan, I think that we do, and that we need to see where our spiritual energies can take us, and work with a higher vibration. When things were forced on us as children we rebelled, and maybe in later life we see more clearly the advantages that Spirit can bring. It is never ever too late, and I know that your spiritual energies and your faith will see you through all through your life on this Earth in good times and bad! Your beliefs and your energies will help others when the time comes, and you will enjoy helping others to see your point of view.

the first move? They often do just that, provoking or promoting a process of communication that can be heard and treasured and that can start a process of spiritual discovery in which experiences through love and light can be shown to provide phenomena and a tuning into the language of the dead. It sounds very scary, maybe too difficult to believe, but it is within anyone’s consciousness if they have an open mind, and though you do not have to believe in the process, it does work and if you have faith it can work even better. Otherwise I have been talking to myself for the last forty nine years! I also have to conduct a system of contact when there has been no other previous contact with Spirit. This is a request to make a call directly through to the call centre of the Spirit World with a need to contact when no previous evidence of survival has been received. With love and a touch of expertise the calling card is sent, and in this direction it is quite amazing the response received. Many inhabitants of the Spirit World become very adapt and begin to realise that they can reach a captive audience here on Earth if they play their cards right and learn the technique of direct contact through a Medium or a Clairvoyant. Very often too they can learn to communicate directly with loved ones, who do not realise the skills they have, and who experience subsequently a genuine aptitude to speak to inhabitants of the Other Side. Being a part of this communication process has been a wonderful way of working, and my personal devotion to my work has opened many people to experiencing a wonderful connection with Spirit. I have never ever said, “Is there anybody there?” I like to think that I have always known that the answer is, for me, that I have almost always already known someone is there, and just waiting, and wanting, to come through.

Love & Light... Kenny Corris

Kenny’s diary Monday May 16th and Wednesday May 18th: Readings at Bistro Maya, Albir from 16.30. Call: 966 868 213 for bookings and further info. Sunday May 22nd: How to Ascend in 2012. Day workshop to examine World events, and how to use spiritual energy to face the great and wonderful changes we are expecting! Held in Finestrat from 10.30 to 17.30. Thursday June 2nd: Service for the ASF at The Forum Alfaz del Pi at 18.30. All welcome to a demonstration of clairvoyance. Saturday June 11th: Readings at La Fustera, between Calpe and Benissa from 10.00. Call Penny Smith on: 965 749 182 OR 687 926 021.

contact kenny Appointments: 96 587 8424 Mobile: 686 361 594 Web: www.kennycorris.net Forum: www.kennycorris.net/forum Email: kennycorris@hotmail.com Please contact me for inclusion in my healing list!

horoscopes by Kenny Corris Mars connects with Mercury and backs something you are finding it hard to bring yourself to say. For the sake of peace and contentment do not remain silent, since there is much to share right now, and new objectives do need to be viewed and commented on by others, to gain that extra perspective. Nevertheless be ruthless and ensure that you remain in close control of the situation. Venus resides, and mid week is joined by Mercury, who begins the double act that allows for a conjunction between these very different planets. With Venus shining a light for you, in which should be reflected the need to connect with your heart, and Mercury making a play for what you are about to do, there is a rational and calm approach to the excitement that you are about to experience. Mercury connects with Venus and then sextiles Neptune in turn. These form a corner in which a lot of deadwood is cut away and you are free to go either which way. Above all follow your instincts and intuition and make this the opportunity that you have been waiting for. There will always be those who will think that you are running before you can walk, but right now you are resourceful, and patient, and in control. Crablike wanderings see you poised with pincers ready to nip something into shape. Taking all into consideration you are free to express your feelings and have restrained anger for some time just lately. Whilst you cannot stop the actions of others you can give them a run for their money, and if this also squares things then bring it on sooner than later because time is of the essence. It is very hard to put your finger on what really is the problem holding you back, but dump some of that attention seeking behaviour in favour of making a clean breast of things. Romance flirts with your highly prized innermost self, and pride comes before a fall, so stop playing and play to win where love enters and there is a will, there will surely be a way, though you may be agonisingly slow on the uptake. Chiron features towards the end of the week as specific actions of Mercury Mars and Venus join and go into sextile. This is for sure, not a time to make any decisions but it is a time to plan and to keep your eye on things. You are about to make some changes that will bring a depth to new projects and suitably this is very much a time to launch yourself into what it is you really want to do. Balance is the name of your game and Venus tugs at your heart string to be allowed the freedom to unite your innermost dreams and desires, before Pluto shows up and makes a mighty sweep in the opposite of directions. Right now is the need to consolidate and conserve, and, testing the water, as you will, there comes a great time of coherence and someone to beckon you safely onwards! You may very well have bitten off far more than you can chew, but a challenge beckons and there comes a time to strike whilst the iron is hot. Many people have given you the so called benefit of their suggestions, but it is alone and with confidence that you strike a chord that heralds that which you need to do, beyond the shadow of a doubt, and with stubborn pride and energies to lead you on. With the subtle fortune of a wayward Juputer, conjunction with Pluto is designed to throw you off course. In actual fact with the subtle energies of an ebullient Gemini and a fleeting glimpse of romantic Venus there is a time to weigh up the pro’s and the cons and stop stalling. They say that you will always hurt the one that you really love, but be honest, do you really have to? Your instincts are telling you to take everything on board right now, but please, don’t do it if you value your pride. There is something being held back from you because, if known, it would alter the situation. With concerns and doubts nagging you, and no safe place to hide, put your faith in the tried and tested and follow your truly inspiring instincts rather than conform to someone’s elevated ego. Neptune plays with Venus and Mercury, and you are at a crossroads regarding a balance of work rest and play. You need to have some quality time to prove things to yourself, and there is much on the home front to occupy you right now. Let bygones be bygones and see what will happen if you put faith into something that brings dividends to you and balances the books quite nicely. The strongly psychic energies that embrace you are about to show you a loophole and a clear way forward. You are about to experience something that may initially put the cat amongst the pigeons, but will ensure that your need to move on to pastures new is taken into account and your wishes granted. Take the opportunity to show all who doubt you what you are really capable of.

If it’s your birthday this week... Planetary actions are clearly showing you a year in which you may well experience a great deal of changes. All is not what it seems right now, and things are about to get better as you eliminate past fear and anger.

13 - 19 may2010 2011 8-14 JANUARY

Word Ladders The key rule is that you must only change one letter at a time as you move from one rung to another, and the word you make must be a proper word! Therefore you may move from BATH --> BATS but not from BATH --> CASH because that changes two letters in one go which is not allowed.

Cryptic Crossword

Sudoku Across

impressive sum (5,5)

Down 1. A fool disposed to be distant (5) 2. Possibly it rarely is about books (8) 3. Play for the village (6) 4. Invest capital in kitchen equipment (4) 5. Became acquainted with brick-carriers’ ways of working (7) 6. Surprise someone more than they can say? (6,4) 9. Gets blooming old? (4,2,4) 12. An inclination to write and sing (8) 14. He makes a new reactor (7) 16. Believe one side of the account (6) 19. Stand by a new lease (5) 20. Blueprint for a tail-less aircraft (4)

Across

Down

1. Taking Hostage (10)

1. Recognises (5)

7. Perch (5)

2. Explode (8)

8. Secluded (7)

3. Apprehend (6)

10. Stronghold (8)

4. Compassion (4)

11. Overtake (4)

5. Recount (7)

13. Tell (6)

6. Promotion (10)

15. To this (6)

9. Jarring (10)

17. Every single (4)

12. Under obligation (8)

18. Perverse (8)

14. Permission (7)

21. Defensible (7)

16. Contrive (6)

22. Overwhelm (5)

19. Expiate (5)

23. Contrition (10)

20. Clever (4)

1. Nevertheless, there’s no variety (3,3,4) 7. It has been known to be tickled to death (5) 8. I left the priest in church (7) 10. Told but possibly not needing to be (8) 11. Given a start in life (4) 13. What the unsatisfied audience may shout!! (6) 15. Afternoon service? (3-3) 17. He employs us with hesitation (4) 18. Continues to make money (8) 21. Drunk, but not canned! (7) 22. A small island passage (5) 23. The aggregate is an

Wordwheel

Quick Crossword

You can play these wordwheels by whatever rules you like. But there is at least one nine letter word hidden in each wordwheel (and thus using every letter in the wordwheel). For many players the fun element and biggest challenge of the wordwheel is to find a nine letter word. Other than that, the rules are up to you - but generally you should restrict yourself to only finding words that contain the central letter, as otherwise you will find huge numbers of words in many puzzles!

Win a meal for 2! Inn Plaice in Torrevieja (Mon-Thu)

Nemos (Next to RTN offices in La Nucia) by answering the Cryptic Crossword correctly. Answers by email to: office@roundtownnews.com | or Fax: 96 585 60 54 *This must be used no later than 3 weeks of notification

Euromillions Draw Friday 6th May

11 16 20 22 28

One Spanish ticket won the 28,772,008 Euros (£25,227,296) jackpot prize

Answers & Winners Last week’s Crossword and Suduko answers found on page 51/54. Winner for 603 Lesley Byrom, San Luis

13 - 19 May 2011

music scene Chill Factor – Vocal Duo C Compiled by

Eric Taylor Presenter Heat Gold 94.1FM

HILL FACTOR are Pam and John Pearson, a highly professional musical duo with a difference as their repertoire focuses on classic pop/rock songs performed in their own style. This duo is a delight to listen to as they perform two sets – acoustic and electric. Their acoustic set combines the unique sound of John’s ten string acoustic guitar with Pam’s edgy and soulful vocals, giving a performance of flair and originality followed by an electric set which is.... electric! Together with Jack Hazebroek (drums) and Tommy Duffy (bass) they are ‘Rio’, (a new classic rock band). For more details phone John or Pam on 696 731 290 or check out their web site: www.pamandjohn.net

Wednesday 18th, L’ Almacera Restaurant, Teulada Sunday 22nd, Coll de Rates Rte, Parcent - 1.30pm (John Acoustic) Sunday 29th, Coll de Rates Mountain Restaurant, Parcent - 1.30pm

MAY GIGS Friday13th, An Shebeen, Javea (Rio)

Chloe Hooper – Female Vocal Entertainer CHLOE HOOPER is an International Vocalist and Tribute act. Chloe as a performer can best be described as both a dynamic and powerful vocalist, yet extremely versatile, singing a mixture of songs that include Country, Blues & Soul, Rock & Pop, plus Jazz, lounge & easy listening. Chloe can be found playing every Friday at Rusty’s Bar/Bistro, Benitachell and the ‘Western Saloon’ in Benidorm from 8.30pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays with Bernie Price and their Country Legends Show. They will also be appearing in the

Moraira Music Festival on Sunday 12th June. Phone Chloe: 607 621 699 for more details or visit her website: www.chloehooper.net. GIGS IN MAY Friday 13th, Rusty’s Bar/Bistro Benitachell (Every Friday) Monday 16th, Bar Ambiente, Moravit, Moraira (Every Monday) Tuesday 17th, Western Saloon, C/ Gerona, Benidorm (Every Tuesday) Thursday 19th, Western Saloon, C/Gerona, Benidorm (Every Thursday)

Freddie Kool – Singer/Entertainer Heat Gold Radio ‘FREDDIE KOOL’ is a versatile singer/entertainer who has recently arrived to live in the Costa Blanca area. He was a semi-pro singer with several bands until three years ago when he decided to embark on a solo singing career in the North of England. Now established in Gandia, Freddie is available for all types of functions performing songs from the 60s to present day. For more info phone: 962 868 984.

Station - 94.1FM ‘HEAT GOLD 94.1 FM, Radio Station’, will be doing a live broadcast from ‘Cafe Olay’, Jalon Valley, on Sunday 15th May from 10am in support of the Jalon Valley ‘HELP’ May Fare. Playing the greatest hits of all time – come along, meet the presenters and hand in your requests/dedications for all your ‘Golden Oldies’. For more information phone 96 574 4363 or listen in on www.heatgold.fm: Text 656 634 000 for your requests or dedications.

ET’s Golden Oldies Disco Tel: 965 748 199 or 659 921 875 or email: etinspain@hotmail.com. If there are any music venues or acts that wish to be featured in this column,please contact Eric directly.

Parcent ***TONIGHT***

Friday May 13th Zodiac

May 19th

Live music with Daniel

June 3rd

Mabs charity night with 100€ Free raffle & Elton John Tribute Show

Sat. June 18th

Fathers Day Bash With Rob Sweeney

Tel 96 640 5398 For reservations

13 - 19 May 2011

Animal magic by Jack Troughton CAMEO ENTERTAINERS helped animal charities AKIRI and APAC raise 424€ after performing the cabaret group’s new show Rollercoaster of Love at Restaurante El Andaluz, Moraira. Pauline Curtis (pictured third from left) and Elaine Sydney (second from right) of AKIRI joined four Cameo dancers at a photo call after the successful evening. Cameo next performs Rollercoaster of Love at Restaurante Bar Nou, Senija, on Saturday 21st May, and Restaurante Bar Mediterraneo, Teulada, on Saturday 11th June. Tickets are 12€ and 15€ respectively and both include a twocourse meal with wine and are available by calling the Cameo Box Office on 656 483 654 open Monday to Friday 10am until 2pm, and as spaces are limited early booking is recommended. And the charity raffle at Bar Nou will be organised by Pegobased animal charity LAPS, the Local animal Protection Society.

The Jubilee Jazz Band appearing soon… THE JUBILEE Jazz Band is to appear on Tuesday 10th May at Monroe’s Carvery, starting at 8.30pm and again on Tuesday 24th May at the same time. On Saturday 4th June the band will be making an appearance at the Jazz Festival in Valle del Almanzora (near Pulpi), Almeria. Anyone interested in visiting this jazz festival with The Jubilee Jazz Band, let us know soon and we shall

try to arrange a coach for groups. Don’t forget that we are

on Facebook too! More details from: www. thejubileejazzband.com

13 - 19 May 2011

Words from Jim Shearer from Restaurante Al Fresco: on the list for the BLOC Party Finestrat

“LAST SATURDAY 7th May was a successful evening and a wonderful introduction of Miguel Climent and the BLOC Party to the foreign residents. Mainly Brits from both Finestrat and La Cala assisted and drank a toast to Finestrat’s future: I spoke a little about why we should vote for the BLOC Party so did Miguel, in Spanish. “We spoke about the major policies from our manifesto, including how we want to improve public services to and from the village, build a new health centre with the appropriate number of doctors and staff with improved opening hours, construct a new day centre for the elderly, improve the access to the Commercial Centre and to re-channel the gully in La Cala to stop the flooding when it rains. “Lots of proposals to improve the quality of life of our residents were mentioned: the establishment of a community association to help foreign residents with any problems and also

allow the association to suggest improvements and help in the participation of local activities; free running of our new nursery school instead of off-loading it to the private sector; how to improve the tourism industry of our area; improve the cleaning and security services; promote the construction of affordable housing for the young; the use of more solar energy and the allocation of contracts primarily to local businesses. “The list of improvements goes on and on, you are invited to get a copy of the manifesto in English, from both Restaurante Al Fresco and Bar Serena’s. “If you are in agreement with all of our policies or have any questions to resolve, please come to either Bar Serena’s in Finestrat town or Restaurante Al Fresco We will be more than delighted to answer your questions and also provide you with an official pre-printed voting form for our Party.

13 - 19 may 2011

Model lunch

by Jack Troughton SPRING AND summer fashions will be modelled after a leisurely lunch in an afternoon charity fund raiser on Saturday 21st May. The Lions Club of Jalon and Orba has organised the event at the Los Arcos Restaurant on the N332 at Pedregeur with proceeds being used to support local charities in the community. The meal begins at 1pm and the fashion show at 3pm with clothes being modelled from Occassions of Jalon and Orba, Tutu and Moda Natural of Denia, as well as displays from businesses in the area offering skincare and beauty treatments, jewellery and perfumes. Tickets for the lunch and show are 22€ and for the fashion show alone 10€. They are available from Los Arcos itself, the Occasions Boutiques in both Jalon and Orba, by calling 669 529 286, or by emailing cliff.edmonds@gmail.com. A spokesman for the Lions told RTN: “Gentlemen are welcome, if they do not wish to sit through the show; they can take advantage of the afternoon bar and spend some time in the lovely gardens until their credit cards or cheque books are required!”

I’m thinking of opening a restaurant BEING THE size and age that I am there are not many phrases left that give me the Jitters or Collywobbles anymore as I think I’ve just about heard them all. But if I had to list them in order I suppose “Stick em up” would rank fairly high as well as “Your flight’s been cancelled” and “you’re credit card has been refused.” However, the most troubling phrase I hear on a regular basis is: “I’m thinking of opening a restaurant” As chefs all over Europe are undoubtedly getting better the restaurants are sadly not. If you ask a reasonably good chef what their ambition is they will usually reply, “One day to have my own restaurant,” a noble proclamation indeed but ask where they will be spending most of their time in this new restaurant of theirs and they will probably say, “Out in the front where the customers are,” instead of, “In the kitchen.” It’s hard to describe how hard it is running a restaurant without shouting or swearing which is probably why

chefs are renowned for both. The closest I can come to describing it is to think back to Christmas day and all the worry, planning, shopping, preparation and hard work involved but this time with people you have never met. Then repeat it the same night and then again every day, twice a day everyday for the rest of your life: it’s hard - it’s very, very hard. It’s not only long hours but thankless too with little respect or gratitude from any quarter - no wonder so many chefs want to be out of the kitchen and in the restaurant. “But all my friends say I’m a brilliant cook.” - Another common mistake - next time your friends come round for dinner ask if, instead of bringing a bottle of cheap wine, they bring €50 instead and you will soon discover that they have “other plans” for that night. When they ask, “Is there anything I can do to help?” say, “Yes you can peel the vegetables.” Friends who compliment well and often are more likely to be asked back again; complain about the meal you have just had for free and

Have you ever dreamed of opening a restaurant?

you’ll be waiting by the telephone for a very long time. What type of restaurant do you want? If you are fortunate enough to open an Italian, Chinese or Indian then a lot of work is already taken care of as most of us know what type of food you are going to do and the average price we are going to pay and the ladies will also know

what to wear for the occasion which is a great help for the gentlemen of the family. But why oh why do some people open a restaurant and name it after their favourite cat? ‘Tiddles Restaurant’ - I don’t care how good the food is I still don’t know what food you do, how much it’s going to cost and you know my wife is bound to ask me what she should wear.

tv Friday

50 61

13 2011 14- -1920may may 2010

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Missing 2011 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News 14:30 Regional News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News 16:05 Copycats 16:40 Wingin’ It 17:00 Remote Control Star 17:30 All Over the Place 18:00 Newsround 18:15 The Weakest Link 19:00 BBC News 20:00 The One Show 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 The Comedy Genius of John Sullivan 22:00 Have I Got News for You 22:30 Outnumbered 23:00 BBC News 23:35 Graham Norton Show 24:20 National Lottery Friday Night Draws 24:30 The One Show

07:00 Childrens TV 10:30 Big & Small 10:40 Buzz and Tell 10:45 Big Cook Little Cook 11:05 Timmy Time 11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch: Frock and Roll 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Real Rescues 16:00 Flog It! 16:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 17:30 Pointless 18:15 Show Me the Monet 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Menu 20:00 Windfarm Wars 21:00 Gardeners’ World 21:30 An Education 23:00 Later... with Jools Holland 23:30 Newsnight 24:00 The Review Show 24:50 Later... with Jools Holland

07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News 14:55 Granada News 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 Granada Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Britain’s Best Dish 19:00 Granada Reports 19:30 ITV News 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Baboons with Bill Bailey 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Paul O’Grady Live 23:00 ITV News at Ten 23:30 Granada News 23:35 The Cube 24:35 Take Me Out

07:00 Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 Friends 09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 10:55 Relocation, Relocation 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News 13:05 Make Do & Mend 13:35 Jamie at Home 14:05 Channel 4 Racing 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 Unreported World 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 22:00 The Million Pound Drop Live 23:25 That Peter Kay Thing 23:55 PhoneShop 24:30 Ricky Gervais Show

07:00 Childrens TV 09:40 Olivia 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:05 Extreme Fishing with Robson Green 13:05 Meals in Moments 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:20 Law & Order 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Vanessa Show 16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes 16:10 Perfect Romance 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Fifth Gear 21:00 Ice Road Truckers 22:00 The Mentalist 23:00 Law & Order 23:55 The Walking Dead 24:55 Cops in Crisis

08:00 Wild Vets 09:00 Oops TV 10:00 The Real A & E 11:00 Law & Order 12:00 Dream Lives for Sale 13:00 Dog Squad 14:00 Stargate SG-1 15:00 Stargate SG-1 16:00 Vet Adventures 17:00 Oops TV 17:30 Futurama 18:00 The Simpsons 18:30 Futurama 19:00 A League of Their Own 19:30 The Simpsons 20:00 The Simpsons 20:30 The Middle 21:00 The Simpsons 21:30 Modern Family 22:00 Raising Hope 22:30 A League of Their Own 23:30 Spartacus: Blood and Sand 24:45 Ross Kemp on Gangs

08:30 Eurosport for the Planet 09:00 Live Intercontinental Rally Challenge 10:00 Live Table Tennis 11:30 WTA Tennis 12:00 Live WTA Tennis 13:45 Cycling 14:30 Live Cycling 17:30 WTA Tennis 19:30 Live WTA Tennis 21:15 Tennis 21:45 Strongest Man 22:45 Cycling 24:00 Under-17s European Championship Football

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 America’s Next Top Model 11:00 Nothing to Declare 11:30 Nothing to Declare 12:00 Maury 13:00 Charmed 14:00 Charmed 15:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 17:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 18:00 Criminal Minds 19:00 America’s Next Top Model 20:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 21:00 Bones 22:00 Criminal Minds 23:00 CSI: Miami 24:00 Criminal Minds

The Comedy Genius of John Sullivan BBC1 21.30

Canterbury Tales with the Yabooh Theatre coming soon LOCAL CHARITIES are to benefit from Terry Dean’s production of Chaucer’s Canterbury tales, to be presented by the Yabooh Theatre Group at the open air amphitheatre in Rafol from June 2nd to 4th. Each ticket will include a donation to charity as well as an interval drink at the local bar. With only three weeks to go, the cast is anxiously going through its paces and to add a medieval authenticity a team of seamstresses is expertly creating costumes for each of the seven tales chosen from Chaucer’s collection. Tickets at 11€ may still be obtained from the Box Office (674 401 517) or by email from yaboohtheatre @gmail.com

Adventure of the Seas From Valencia 7 Nights Corsica; Italy; Spain No Flights or Transfers Included 05/06/2011 £1194 from £443 Norwegian Epic From Barcelona 7 Nights | 7 Nights | Balearics; Italy No Flights or Transfers Included 22/05/2011 £1084 from £549 Brilliance of the Seas From Barcelona | 12 Nights | French Riviera; Greece; Italy; Turkey No Flights Or Transfers Included 31/05/2011 £2072 from £750 Costa Serena From Barcelona | 7 Nights | French Riviera; Italy; Sicily; Tunisia No Flights or Transfers Included 03/06/2011 £1261 from £646 Celebrity Mercury From Barcelona | 12 Nights |Croatia; French Riviera; Italy; No Flights Or Transfers Included 7/06/2011 £1677 from £865 MSC Splendida from Barcelona | 7 Nights | Italy; Spain; Tunisia No Flights or Transfers Included 10/06/2011 £2184 from £1068

tv Saturday 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Great British Menu 13:00 BBC News; Regional News 13:15 Football Focus 14:00 Olympic Dreams 14:30 Cash in the Celebrity Attic 15:15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds 16:00 Father of the Bride 17:40 Don’t Scare the Hare 18:15 BBC News; Regional News 18:30 So You Think You Can Dance Live 19:30 Doctor Who 20:20 So You Think You Can Dance 20:50 National Lottery Saturday Night Draws 21:00 Eurovision Song Contest 2011 24:15 BBC News 24:35 Match of the Day

07:00 Childrens TV 09:00 Fee Fi Fo Yum 09:30 Prank Patrol Down Under 09:55 Sam & Mark’s Guide to Dodging Disaster 10:00 Dick & Dom Go Wild 10:30 Serious Explorers 11:00 Relic: Guardians of the Museum 11:30 League of Super Evil 11:40 Wolverine and the X-Men 12:00 Mortified 12:25 OOglies 12:40 MOTD Kickabout 13:00 The Spanish Main 14:35 Battle Cry 17:00 Two Greedy Italians 18:00 Flog It! 18:45 Dad’s Army 19:15 The Comedy Genius of John Sullivan 19:45 Citizen Smith 20:15 The Two Ronnies 21:00 Domesday 22:00 Have I Got a Bit More News for You 22:45 Blood Diamond

07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:25 House Gift 10:25 Coronation Street 12:45 This Morning: Saturday 13:45 ITV News 14:00 Live FA Cup Final 18:30 Granada News 18:45 ITV News 19:00 New Animals Do the Funniest Things 20:00 Sing If You Can 21:00 Britain’s Got Talent 22:00 Piers Morgan’s Life Stories 23:00 ITV News 23:15 FA Cup Final Highlights 24:15 The Enforcer

CRYPTIC SOLUTIONS for 603 Across: 6 Arising; 7 Clock; 9 One; 10 Reservoir; 12 Stand at ease; 15 Painstaking; 17 Wrestlers; 19 Ate; 21 Gamut; 22 Convert. Down: 1 Crank; 2 Ass; 3 Knee; 4 Old Vienna; 5 Eclipse; 8 Remark; 11 Stands out; 13 Nettle; 14 Fairway; 16 Stork; 18 Rook; 20 Eve. Quick solutions Across: 6 Compare; 7 Snake; 9 Try; 10 Manifests; 12 Second sight; 15 Shorthanded; 17 Community; 19 Bad; 21 Agony; 22 Massive. Down: 1 Worry; 2 Spy; 3 Area; 4 Undecided; 5 Sketchy; 8 Hidden; 11 Detriment; 13 On hand; 14 Through; 16 Halve; 18 Tear; 20 Ask. WORDWHEEL 604: FORBIDDEN

13 - 19 may 2011

08:00 FIM Superbike World Championship 08:25 British Formula Ford Championship 08:55 The Morning Line 09:55 Friends 10:25 Koko Pop 11:00 The Saturdays: What Goes on Tour 11:20 Glee 12:45 Friends 13:20 The Saturdays: What Goes on Tour 13:40 Big Bang Theory 14:15 That Paralympic Show 14:50 Channel 4 Racing 17:00 Come Dine with Me Down Under 18:00 Come Dine with Me Down Under 19:00 Come Dine with Me Down Under 19:30 Channel 4 News 19:55 4thought.tv 20:00 Restoration Man 21:00 The Untold Battle of Britain 22:00 Million Pound Drop Live 23:20 Stand Up for the Week 24:10 Epic Movie

07:00 Childrens TV 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Olivia 10:15 Mr Men Show 10:30 Gerald McBoing Boing 11:00 Animal Rescue Squad 11:20 The Gadget Show 12:20 The Green Berets 15:05 Mystery Woman 16:50 Murder 101: College Can Be Murder 18:30 Major Dundee 20:55 5 News Weekend 21:00 NCIS 22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 CSI: Miami 24:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

08:15 Futurama 10:00 WWE: Superstars 11:00 Soccer AM 13:00 A Different Breed 14:00 A Town Called Eureka 15:00 WWE: Smackdown 17:00 Futurama: Welcome to the World of Tomorrow 17:15 Futurama 19:00 Emergency with Angela Griffin 20:00 The Simpsons 21:00 Road Wars 22:00 Judge Dredd 23:50 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK 24:50 The Hades Factor

08:30 Table Tennis 09:00 Live Intercontinental Rally Challenge 10:00 Live Table Tennis 11:30 Tennis 12:00 Live WTA Tennis 13:45 Cycling 14:30 Live Cycling 17:30 Live Table Tennis 18:45 WTA Tennis 20:00 Live Intercontinental Rally Challenge 21:00 Fight Club 23:00 Cycling 24:00 WTA Tennis

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 Four Weddings 11:00 America’s Next Top Model 12:00 Sun, Sea and A&E 13:00 Biggest Loser 15:00 Nothing to Declare 16:00 America’s Next Top Model 17:00 Drop Dead Diva 18:00 Drop Dead Diva 19:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 21:00 Chuck 22:00 Criminal Minds 23:00 Criminal Minds 24:00 Criminal Minds

tv Sunday

52 40

13 - 19 2011 4 2010 Feb 26may - March

07:00 Breakfast 08:55 Match of the Day 10:00 Andrew Marr Show 11:00 Big Questions 12:00 Country Tracks 13:00 The Politics Show 14:00 EastEnders 15:55 Bargain Hunt 16:20 Escape to the Country 17:20 Life of Riley 17:50 Lifeline 18:00 Points of View 18:15 Songs of Praise 18:50 BBC News; Regional News 19:10 Land Girls 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Pirates of the Caribbean: the Curse of the Black Pearl 23:10 BBC News; Regional News 23:35 Meet the Multiples 24:35 Night Listener

07:00 Childrens TV 07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports 07:45 Charlie and Lola 08:00 Space Hoppers 08:25 Arthur 08:50 Shaun the Sheep 09:00 Fee Fi Fo Yum 09:30 Gimme a Break 10:00 Friday Download 11:00 Live Athletics 13:00 World Olympic Dreams 13:30 Live MotoGP 15:00 Live Swimming 16:30 Live Athletics 18:05 McLintock! 20:10 Richard Hammond’s Engineering Connections 21:00 Britain’s Secret Seas 22:00 Operation Crossbow 23:00 Match of the Day 2 24:20 The Shadow Line

07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:25 May the Best House Win 10:25 Dickinson’s Real Deal 11:25 Sing If You Can 12:30 This Morning: Sunday 13:30 Dinner Date 14:25 ITV News 14:40 Columbo 16:10 Britain’s Got Talent 17:10 The Spy Who Loved Me 19:30 Granada News 19:45 ITV News 20:00 The Cube 21:00 Vera 23:00 ITV News at Ten 23:15 Perspectives 24:15 Surgery School

07:00 Sali Mali 07:05 The Hoobs 07:30 The Grid 08:00 Freesports on 4 08:25 The Saturdays: What Goes on Tour 08:45 Hollyoaks 11:15 The Saturdays: What Goes on Tour 11:35 Being N-Dubz in America and Beyond 12:10 The Saturdays: What Goes on Tour 12:30 Glee 13:50 The Simpsons 14:25 The Simpsons 14:55 Celebrity Coach Trip 15:55 Celebrity Coach Trip 17:00 Celebrity Coach Trip 17:30 Deal or No Deal 18:30 Time Team 19:30 Channel 4 News 19:55 4thought.tv 20:00 Come Dine with Me 21:00 The Hotel 22:00 Die Hard 4.0 24:30 The Business

07:00 Childrens TV 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Olivia 10:15 Mr Men Show 10:30 Gerald McBoing Boing 11:00 Family Food Fight 11:30 OK! TV Sunday 12:30 Hotel Inspector 13:30 Extreme Fishing with Robson Green - At the Ends of the Earth 14:30 Ice Road Truckers 15:35 Gunsmoke 17:10 5 News Weekend 17:20 Are We Done Yet? 19:05 Zathura: a Space Adventure 21:10 Practical Magic 23:00 The Walking Dead 24:05 House on Haunted Hill

07:00 Hour of Power 08:00 My Pet Shame 09:00 A Different Breed 10:00 Oops TV 11:00 WWE: Superstars 12:00 WWE: Experience 13:00 Stargate Universe 14:00 A Town Called Eureka 15:00 The Simpsons 15:30 The Simpsons 16:00 The Simpsons 16:30 The Simpsons 17:00 The Simpsons 17:30 The Simpsons 18:00 The Simpsons 18:30 The Simpsons 19:00 A League of Their Own 19:30 A League of Their Own 20:00 The Middle 20:30 Modern Family 21:00 Raising Hope 21:30 The Simpsons 22:00 Hawaii Five-0 23:00 NCIS: Los Angeles 24:00 House

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Fake Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Sam & Mark’s Guide to Dodging Disaster 16:40 Wingin’ It 17:00 Sadie J 17:30 Blue Peter 18:00 Newsround 18:15 The Weakest Link 19:00 BBC News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Saints and Scroungers 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Panorama 22:00 The Street That Cut Everything 23:00 BBC News 23:35 The Street That Cut Everything 24:05 Graham Norton Show

07:00 Childrens TV 11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch: Frock and Roll 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Pointless 18:15 Show Me the Monet 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Menu 20:00 Story of Ireland 21:00 Business Nightmares with Evan Davis 22:00 Children’s Craniofacial Surgery 23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:30 Newsnight 24:20 Richard Hammond’s Engineering Connections

07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News 14:55 Granada News 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:59 Granada Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Britain’s Best Dish 19:00 Granada Reports 19:30 ITV News 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 The Dales 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Strangeways 23:00 ITV News at Ten 23:30 Granada News 23:35 A Perfect Murder

07:00 Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 Friends 09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 10:55 Relocation, Relocation 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News 13:05 Jamie at Home 13:35 River Cottage Bites 13:40 Distant Drums 15:40 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Dispatches 22:00 Gordon’s Great Escape 23:00 The Sixth Sense

07:00 Childrens TV 09:40 Olivia 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:05 Warship 13:05 Family Recipe 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Law & Order 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Vanessa Show 16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes 16:10 Returning Lily 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 How Do They Do It? 21:00 The Gadget Show 22:00 Hotel Inspector 23:00 There’s Something About Josie 24:00 Evil Woman

08:00 Wild Vets 09:00 Oops TV 10:00 The Real A & E 11:00 Law & Order 12:00 Law & Order 13:00 Customs 14:00 Stargate SG-1 15:00 Stargate SG-1 16:00 Vet Adventures 17:00 Lie to Me 18:00 The Simpsons 18:30 Futurama 19:00 Oops TV 19:30 The Simpsons 20:00 The Simpsons 20:30 The Simpsons 21:00 Stargate Universe 22:00 A League of Their Own 23:00 Spartacus: Blood and Sand 24:15 Caprica

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Fake Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Sam & Mark’s Guide to Dodging Disaster 16:40 Wingin’ It 17:00 Sadie J 17:30 Blue Peter 18:00 Newsround 18:15 The Weakest Link 19:00 BBC News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 Crimewatch 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News 23:35 Crimewatch Update 23:45 See You in Court

07:00 Childrens TV 10:50 Big Cook Little Cook 11:10 Timmy Time 11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch: Frock and Roll 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 Daily Politics 13:00 The Queen in Ireland: BBC News Special 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Pointless 18:15 Show Me the Monet 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Menu 20:00 Britain’s Secret Seas 21:00 Britain’s Next Big Thing 22:00 The Country House Revealed 23:00 Later Live... with Jools Holland 23:30 Newsnight 24:20 Operation Crossbow

07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News 14:55 Granada News 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:59 Granada Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Britain’s Best Dish 19:00 Granada Reports 19:30 ITV News 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Military Driving School 21:00 Countrywise 22:00 Home Is Where the Heart Is 23:00 ITV News at Ten 23:30 Granada News 23:35 The Pelican Brief

07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 Friends 09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 10:55 Relocation: Phil Down Under 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News 13:05 River Cottage Every Day 14:05 Water Stories 14:10 Very Important Person 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Supersize vs Superskinny 22:00 Secret Millionaire 23:00 Jamie’s Food Revolution Hits Hollywood 24:05 Misfits

07:00 Childrens TV 10:00 Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:05 Warship 13:05 Family Recipe 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Law & Order 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Vanessa Show 16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes 16:15 Always and Forever 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Highland Emergency 21:00 Supersize Grime 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 CSI: Miami 23:55 CSI: NY 24:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

tv Monday

tv Tuesday

08:30 World Touring Car Championship 09:00 Live World Touring Car Championship 09:30 Table Tennis 10:30 Live Table Tennis 11:15 Live World Series by Renault 12:30 Live World Touring Car Championship 13:45 Live Auto GP 14:45 Live World Touring Car Championship 15:45 Live Cycling 17:30 Under-17s European Championship Football 19:15 WTA Tennis 20:15 Table Tennis 21:15 Boxing 22:15 Intercontinental Rally Challenge 22:40 Motorsports

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 Four Weddings 11:00 Drop Dead Diva 12:00 Drop Dead Diva 13:00 Four Weddings US 14:00 Four Weddings US 15:00 Four Weddings US 16:00 Passport Patrol 17:00 Morbidly Obese 18:00 Nothing to Declare 19:00 Nothing to Declare 19:30 Nothing to Declare 20:00 Four Weddings Revisited 21:00 Cougar Town 21:30 Hot in Cleveland 22:00 Katie 23:00 The Hunks 24:00 Grey’s Anatomy

Die Hard 4.0 Channel 4 22.00

08:30 Motorsports Weekend 08:45 World Touring Car Championship 09:45 Table Tennis 10:45 WTA Tennis 11:45 Cycling 12:45 Cycling 13:45 Under-17s European Championship Football 15:00 WTA Tennis 16:00 Cycling 17:30 Champions Club 18:30 Under-17s European Championship Football 19:45 Cycling 20:45 WATTS 20:55 Cycling 21:30 WTA Tennis 22:30 Champions Club 23:30 Live Cycling 24:45 Cycling

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 America’s Next Top Model 11:00 Nothing to Declare 12:00 Maury 13:00 Charmed 14:00 Charmed 15:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 17:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 18:00 Criminal Minds 19:00 America’s Next Top Model 20:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 21:00 Katie 22:00 Four Weddings Revisited 23:00 16 & Pregnant 24:00 Criminal Minds

Watch New Season TV for Free with the RTN Network 966 463 170

08:00 Wild Vets 08:30 Bondi Vet 09:00 Oops TV 10:00 The Real A & E 10:30 The Real A & E 11:00 Lie to Me 12:00 Dream Lives for Sale 13:00 Customs 13:30 Customs 14:00 Stargate SG-1 15:00 Stargate SG-1 16:00 Vet Adventures 17:00 Lie to Me 18:00 The Simpsons 18:30 Futurama 19:00 Oops TV 19:30 The Simpsons 20:00 The Simpsons 20:30 The Simpsons 21:00 A Different Breed 22:00 Judge Dredd 23:50 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK 24:50 Fringe

08:30 Cycling 09:30 Cycling 10:30 Cycling 11:30 Under-17s European Championship Football 12:45 Champions Club 13:45 Cycling 14:30 Live Cycling 17:30 Live WTA Tennis 19:30 WATTS 19:45 Boxing 20:45 Boxing 22:30 Inside WTCC 23:00 World Series by Renault 23:35 Live Cycling 24:45 Cycling

Crimewatch BBC1 22.00

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 America’s Next Top Model 11:00 Nothing to Declare 12:00 Maury 13:00 Charmed 14:00 Charmed 15:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 17:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 18:00 Criminal Minds 19:00 America’s Next Top Model 20:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 21:00 Cougar Town 21:30 Hot in Cleveland 22:00 Dating in the Dark 23:00 The Hunks 24:00 Criminal Minds

tv Wednesday 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Fake Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News 14:30 Regional News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Sam & Mark’s Guide to Dodging Disaster 16:40 Wingin’ It 17:00 Dani’s House 17:30 Little Howard’s Big Question 18:00 Newsround 18:15 The Weakest Link 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Waterloo Road 21:30 Life of Riley 22:00 The Apprentice 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News 23:35 National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:45 Not Going Out 24:15 Prime

07:00 Childrens TV 10:05 Koala Brothers 10:15 Guess with Jess 10:30 Big & Small 10:45 Buzz and Tell 10:50 Big Cook Little Cook 11:10 Timmy Time 11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch: Frock and Roll 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 See Hear 14:30 Lifeline 14:40 Coast 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Pointless 18:15 Show Me the Monet 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Menu 20:00 Escape to the Country 21:00 Two Greedy Italians 22:00 Wonderland 23:00 The Apprentice: You’re Fired! 23:30 Newsnight 24:20 Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle 24:50 Citizen Ruth

07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News 14:55 Granada News 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:59 Granada Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Britain’s Best Dish 19:00 Granada Reports 19:30 ITV News 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Poms in Paradise 21:00 The British Soap Awards 2011 23:00 ITV News at Ten 23:30 Granada News 23:35 Cops with Cameras 24:35 Long Lost Family

- 19 may 2011 Feb 2613 - March 4 2010

07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 Friends 09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 10:55 Location, Location, Location 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News 13:05 River Cottage Every Day 14:10 Proud Parents 14:20 Dark Command 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Vacation, Vacation, Vacation 21:30 Superscrimpers: Waste Not Want Not 22:00 24 Hours in A&E 23:00 Desperate Housewives 24:05 Big Bang Theory 24:35 Being N-Dubz in America and Beyond

07:00 Childrens TV 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:20 Peppa Pig 09:25 Little Lodgers 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Olivia 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:05 Warship 13:05 Family Recipe 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Law & Order 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Vanessa Show 16:05 Meals in Moments 16:15 McBride 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:15 Live UEFA Europa League Football 23:00 Hollow Man

07:00 Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 Friends 09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 10:55 Location, Location, Location 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News 13:05 River Cottage Every Day 14:00 3 Minute Wonder 14:05 The Sheriff of Fractured Jaw 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Three in a Bed 22:00 Hunting Britain’s Most Wanted 23:00 Comedy Gala: Best Bits 24:05 Secret Millionaire

07:00 Childrens TV 09:25 Little Lodgers 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Olivia 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:05 Warship 13:05 Family Recipe 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Law & Order 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Vanessa Show 16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes 16:10 Secrets of an Undercover Wife 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Rough Guide to... 21:00 Emergency Bikers 22:00 Extreme Fishing with Robson Green - At the Ends of the Earth 23:00 Impossible? 24:05 Banged Up Abroad

08:00 Bondi Vet 08:30 Bondi Vet 09:00 Oops TV 10:00 The Real A & E 10:30 The Real A & E 11:00 Lie to Me 12:00 Dream Lives for Sale 13:00 Customs 13:30 Customs 14:00 Stargate SG-1 15:00 Stargate SG-1 16:00 Vet Adventures 17:00 Lie to Me 18:00 The Simpsons 18:30 Futurama 19:00 Oops TV 19:30 The Simpsons 20:00 The Simpsons 20:30 The Simpsons 21:00 Emergency with Angela Griffin 22:00 Brit Cops: Zero Tolerance 23:00 Fringe 24:00 The Chicago Code

08:35 World Series by Renault 09:00 WATTS 09:15 Cycling 10:15 Cycling 11:30 WTA Tennis 13:00 Tennis 13:30 Cycling 14:30 Live Cycling 17:30 Live WTA Tennis 19:45 Eurogoals Flash 20:00 Wednesday Selection 20:05 Show Jumping 21:05 Equestrian 22:05 Riders Club 22:10 PGA Tour Golf 23:10 European Tour Golf 23:40 Ladies European Tour Golf 23:50 Golf Club 23:55 Yacht Club 24:10 Live Cycling

53 53

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 America’s Next Top Model 11:00 Four Weddings 12:00 Maury 13:00 Charmed 14:00 Charmed 15:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 17:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 18:00 Criminal Minds 19:00 America’s Next Top Model 20:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 21:00 Four Weddings Revisited 22:00 Bones 23:00 Grey’s Anatomy 24:00 Criminal Minds

The British Soap Awards ITV1 21.00

tv Thursday 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Fake Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News 14:30 Regional News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Regional News 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Sam & Mark’s Guide to Dodging Disaster 16:40 Wingin’ It 17:00 Project Parent 17:30 My Life 18:00 Newsround 18:15 The Weakest Link 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Watchdog 22:00 Inside the Human Body 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News 23:35 Question Time 24:35 This Week

07:00 Childrens TV 10:05 Koala Brothers 10:20 Guess with Jess 10:35 Big & Small 10:45 Buzz and Tell 10:50 Big Cook Little Cook 11:10 Timmy Time 11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch: Frock and Roll 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Coast 14:05 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Pointless 18:15 Show Me the Monet 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Menu 20:00 The Culture Show 21:00 Business Nightmares with Evan Davis 22:00 The Shadow Line 23:00 Psychoville 23:30 Newsnight 24:20 The Review Show

07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News 14:55 Granada News 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 16:59 Granada Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Britain’s Best Dish 19:00 Granada Reports 19:30 ITV News 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Long Lost Family 23:00 ITV News at Ten 23:30 Granada News 23:35 Piers Morgan’s Life Stories 24:35 Party People

08:00 Bondi Vet 08:30 Bondi Vet 09:00 Oops TV 10:00 The Real A & E 10:30 The Real A & E 11:00 Lie to Me 12:00 Dream Lives for Sale 13:00 Customs UK 13:30 Customs UK 14:00 Stargate SG-1 15:00 Stargate SG-1 16:00 Vet Adventures 17:00 Lie to Me 18:00 The Simpsons 18:30 Futurama 19:00 Oops TV 19:30 The Simpsons 20:00 The Simpsons 20:30 The Simpsons 21:00 Hawaii Five-0 22:00 The Chicago Code 23:00 House 24:00 NCIS: Los Angeles

08:30 Show Jumping 09:30 Cycling 10:30 Cycling 11:30 Tennis 12:00 WTA Tennis 13:30 Cycling 14:30 Live Cycling 17:30 Live WTA Tennis 19:45 Eurogoals Flash 20:00 Fight Club 23:05 Live Cycling

Watch New Season TV for Free with the RTN Network 966 463 170

07:00 Nothing to Declare 08:00 Jerry Springer Show 09:00 Maury 10:00 America’s Next Top Model 11:00 Four Weddings 12:00 Maury 13:00 Charmed 14:00 Charmed 15:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 17:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 18:00 Criminal Minds 19:00 America’s Next Top Model 20:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 21:00 Chuck 22:00 16 & Pregnant 23:00 Dating in the Dark 24:00 Criminal Minds

54 44

Feb March 13 - 26 19 -may 20114 2010

Guilty pleasure time

The TV Round Up by

Alex Trelinski

Broadcaster and freelance journalist

Book Review by

Danny Collins

copy@dannyjpcollins.com

NE OF TV’s biggest guilty pleasures hits the screen tomorrow night with the Eurovision Song Contest from Dusseldorf. Graham Norton has done well in the last two contests in the impossible role of filling Terry Wogan’s commentator shoes on BBC 1, and of course because we are in Spain, we can vote for the UK entry! I’m certain that Blue will have a decent night and I’ll foolishly predict a top five finish for them. That’s more than sadly can be said for the Spanish entry from Lucia Perez, which may well be in contention for one of the bottom spots. I’ll keep a smiling face whatever happens, in contrast to my hysterical tears back in 1968(I was nine then…so forgive me!) when Cliff Richard and ‘Congratulations’ was robbed by one point by Spain’s Massiel with ‘La La La’.

Did we really learn a lot about David Hasselhoff on ‘Piers Morgan’s Life Stories’ on ITV1 last Saturday? He talked a lot, but actually didn’t say a great deal about his life, and unless it was edited out, there were not as many probing questions about his problem compared to, say, the grilling that Cheryl Cole got last year. I got no real sense of how he has been a survivor, and there was no reference to him being removed as

a judge on ‘America’s Got Talent’ due to his drinking. This oversight I’m sure had nothing to do with the fact that Morgan was also on the judging panel alongside Hasselhoff! Meanwhile, I’m continuing to enjoy watching ‘Britain’s Got Talent’, but there’s one slight problem: I’ve seen nothing yet that is worthy of gracing the attention of Her Majesty at the Royal Variety Performance!

What a wonderful treat we had this week with the return of BBC 1’s ‘The Apprentice’ on successive nights. The show continues to enthrall and with such a big crowd of candidates in the early weeks we have the inevitable clash of egos and stupidity. It’s been a busy week for Lord Sugar, as last Sunday he had a BBC2 programme looking at the financial problems facing English soccer. As always, the former Spurs chairman talked sense, but you get the feeling that his ideas cut little water with the arrogant people that run the sport.

Is the bandwagon that is CSI faltering? Ratings in the States for the New York spin-off have been falling dramatically during this current season, whilst the Miami version and the original have also suffered from viewer losses. Figures on Channel 5 for the UK screenings are also appreciably down. Much as I’m a big fan, ‘CSI: New York’ has had a pretty ropey line of stories in its seventh series and looks positively boring compared to the brilliant new version of ‘Hawaii Five-O’ or the two ‘NCIS’ shows, which are all doing miles better in the ratings. All these programmes are transmitted by CBS in America, and there’s understandable talk that the network might wield the axe on ‘CSI: New York’.

Spanish for Dummies WHEN IS a book not a book? Answer? When it’s an audio set, as this three-disk set is from Wiley’s ‘For Dummies’ series. Jessica Langemeier I’ve come across as a linguist in other colours of the language spectrum. She’s a lady who knows what she’s talking about, so I didn’t foresee any problems on slotting Disk 1 into my computer. Therefore I was pretty thrown when a lady with a Californian accent (Ms Langemeier? Nah, couldn’t be) told me that ‘vosotros’ was the ‘very formal’ third person plural of ‘you’. It might be for Jessica, but I always believed it to be the very informal case, and still do. So no points awarded there, or am I giving up too soon? Ms Langemeier, I’m pretty certain, is North American – so could it be her Spanish has a touch of the frijoles and refried beans? My dictionary tells me I’m right and so, it appears, do all the Spanish phrase books I’ve ever reviewed. Certainly in my days in Madrid nearly 40 years ago, the use of ‘vosotros’ when talking to a group of my elders (or, gulp, the Guardia Civil) would have earned me a hard stare in the former circumstances and a swift clip

around the ear in the latter. Ah well, come on, we’re not all perfect and we’re dealing here, as with most disk versions of language, with the US version. The BBC this ‘aint, so absolute beginners should expect to come out at the other end talking a bit like Speedy González. Those who already have mastered the lisps and ‘elyehs’ of Castellano should be saved. So, apart from a possible error on the first page, the rest looks conquerable. All in all, I found it quite fun to listen to and the lessons are repeated slowly enough for the listener to catch every phonetic. Also, being in disk form, you can play them in your car but do avoid mouthing the words to yourself at traffic lights as other drivers might find this off-putting. After a few weeks you’ll find yourself at the stage of understanding what’s going on around you and you should be able to ask simple questions in banks, stores, and hotels, whatever - unless you really are a Dummy, of course. Author: Jessica Langemeier Publisher: Wiley Publishing Price: €19.60 ISBN: 978 0 047 09585 0

Suduko Answer

motoring by

Brian Deller

Author of Motoring in Spain

13 - 19 may 2011

IF we are caught speeding in a vehicle that does not have Spanish plates, how do we know and will we be advised through the post? The owner will not, immediately. If your vehicle is not registered with Trafico (in other words not on Spanish plates) how will the authorities know whose it is if the offence was recorded with a speed camera? The details of the offending vehicle will be placed on the ‘watch for’ list and it can be stopped later and possibly impounded and the driver certainly fined, especially if the proffered documents are not in order (lack of current tax disc and MOT certificate, etc) These could prove that the owner/driver is resident in Spain so the vehicle should be on Spanish plates; or they could include an out of date MOT certificate, Road Fund Tax receipt (or as I see too frequently, none at all) etc. The EU regulations state that any EU vehicle must be fully legal in the country of registration regardless of which EU country it is being driven in. If a UK vehicle is on a SORN (Sworn Off-Road Statement) then it is not allowed to be driven anywhere on public roads within the EU and that means anywhere the public has ‘free’ access to within the EU including public car parks and urbanisations etc.. Thanks Brian, But…you did not answer my query: I went to the website that you suggest and it appears to me that first you have to register to get a password, and secondly it looks like this site is only good if you have a Spanish driving Licence? Am I correct? Of course you have to have a Spanish licence so that Trafico knows all about your details. How can they place details on their website if they do not have them in the system? That is why they stop foreign vehicles or arrest those who are unable to conclusively prove they live in Spain after they have committed an offence. IF a fine is involved the officers will go with the offending driver to a local cash point to collect the cash if they do not have enough in their wallet: all in my book. The Certificado de Usario is explained in detail in my book, ThirdEdition, over several pages with instructions for residents on how to easily obtain one. It is very useful for any personal tax enquiries or information on most government financial web sites. Sorry you will have to read my book: far too much to write here and that is why I wrote the book. If you do not have one, for the Trafico website enquiry page for penalty points etc, you have to insert your DNI/Residencia number. I hear today on the radio that the old card type Residencia identification is to be reintroduced. The current one is just an A4 form/ certificate; still no photo or thumbprint on it though. How can we know in Spain if we have been caught in a speed camera trap if we have a Spanish plated vehicle? The Trafico web site has a database where the driver/owner can insert his or her DNI Residencia No. or NIE tax No. or the ‘Certificado de Usario’, (the full details on this and how to obtain it by residents are in my book, Third edition, pages 246- 249) and any penalty points lost (or under threat) are shown immediately. I have not lost any or been caught speeding so I cannot describe actual experiences but if you drive over the limit in a Spanish-plated vehicle as a habit, it is suggested that you visit this page often. The Certificado de Usario gives the holder many benefits such as securely accessing personal tax details including local IBI taxes on the AgenciaTributaria website. The Trafico enquiry address is: HTTPS://apl.dgt.es/WEB_COPACI/consultarPuntos.faces

There is much more detailed information on all motoring subjects in my book. Brian Juan (John) Deller, Malaga, author, ‘Motoring in Spain’ www.spainvia.com. Tel: 666 888 870 Brian Deller, author, book Motoring in Spain, ISBN No 978 84 611 9278 6. Shops’ addresses in my web site at: www.spainvia.com/bookshopslist.htm

Kids on cycles THE DIRECTOR General of Trafico has confirmed that it is legal in Spain to carry a child up to the age of six on a cycle providing it has a seat designed to fit the cycle and the cyclist is an adult. It is obligatory for both to wear a safety hat for all main roads but optional for other roads. It is recommended to wear reflective markings or clothing and for cycle lights to be fitted. Cyclists can legally ride two abreast and in groups and have priority over vehicles at unmarked junctions: by law car drivers must allow a 1.5m space when overtaking.

Vastly improved parking at Alicante El Altet Airport PASSENGERS ARE delighted with the new parking facilities at the new El Altet airport. Motorists now have two public car parks to choose from in addition to a long stay car park, with a total capacity of 6,740 spaces over six floors. The parking facilities are connected to the new Terminal via an air bridge.

13 - 19 may 2011

Classified Ads 13 - 19 may 2011

All Major Credit Cards Accepted - 0.31e per word + IVA

Book your advert now 902 118 999 (ext 2)

EMAIL: classifieds@roundtownnews.com | WEBSITE: www.roundtownnews.co.uk | Fax: 96 585 60 54 | Or see our list of classified agents in this section

UK-SPAIN-IRELAND All European Destinations

Removals with the personal touch. Full/part loads. Parcels, flat packs, luggage, door to door service, Storage available, pets transported

Phone 965 696 750 • 0044 (0) 1460 74191 email: chrisyounge73979@aol.com

PRISTINE POOLS

• Professional pool maintenance & cleaning • Replacement pumps, filters, salt systems Ph regulators and accessories supplied and installed • Pipe leaks pressure tested, detected and repaired • Structural leaks investigated and repaired • Refurbishments & upgrades undertaken British Trained with over 15 years experience. Extensive references. All work guaranteed Tel: 96 677 4199 or 678 080 500 www.pristineswimmingpools.com Torrevieja and surrounding areas plus Costa Calida

13 - 19 may 2011 established company, own product range. First class training & support. Telephone 606586587

EXCEL AIR CONDITIONING. See main ad on page 13.Tel/ Fax (Head Office) 966-897-772. Mobiles:680-154-432/676-265-675. Email excelairconditioning@ hotmail.com. All credit/debit cards accepted. SERVICE AIR David Higton: (Tel) 966-865-883 (Mob) 629-308-505 (Email) cool@serviceair.biz

PAWS PET TRANSPORT Spain-UK-Spain every month. We look after your pets as if they belong to us. Call Joe for a chat on 966-074-576 or 650-341-087. email:pawspettransport@hotmail. com

DRIVING TO THE UK? English guest house in France, close to Spanish border. Peaceful location, secure parking. www. millefleursbb.co.uk B&B MORAIRA B&B Moraira Ensuite rooms available from 29.00 euros per night. Tlf:655-912-044

STATIC HOME FOR SALE Immaculate 2 bedroom 35x12ft Static holiday home for sale on picturesque family run holiday park near Pinosa, Alicante. Located on a spacious plot with large master bedroom, shower, toilet, huge living area this holiday home also has Double glazing and air conditioning. Ground rent is paid in full until April 2012. Reluctant sale but must go - €18,000. Please call 0044-7855-490-945 for more details or to arrange a viewing MOBILE/PARK HOMES FROM 17,000€ Fully furnished ready to move into, A/c, tel, Eng TV, on permanent site, bar/res, pool, tennis, gym, shop.Walking distance to San Javier. 5mins to beach, Airport, hospital by car. (also bungalows for rent & caravans plots short term or permanent stays.) Carol 968-192-425 mob. 626-055-622 www. mobilehomesmarmenorspain. com CAMPING LOS GALLARDOS Come to Mojacar! Large campsite + mobile home park open all year, great expat community site, all welcome. 950-528-324. www. CampingLosGallardos.com

SSR SPEED BOAT 4.5Mtr + New Trailer. Yamaha 28hp, E/S. possibility auxiliary engine. Brand New upholstery + extras. 2500€. Tlf:665-068-649 MOORING SPACE AVAILABLE to rent in Javea Fontana Marina. Telephone:606-936-012 or email:karensg8@gmail.com ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS - COSTA BLANCA Confidential Helplines South - 625-912078 North - 648-169-045 www.aa-costablanca.org

SECOND HAND SHOP Bargain Prices. Also 2 man Removal. Tel:-678-067-163 E.mail rastroaltea@hotmail.com

10 COLD DRINK/SNACK VENDING MACHINES with sites,€44,900.excellent cash income, no overhead, work from home, work only one day per week, €31,000 nett yearly. 25 pringle vending machines with sites €14,900.€250 per week guaranteed.965-326442/659-696-455 SOLAR ENERGY BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY Long

BYTEBACK MICROS computer repairs/upgrades in your home. Qualified technician. Systems custom built. Whatever your problem call: 965-312-006 or 606-127-424 PC SOLUTIONS 4U For all your PC needs. Reliable & friendly service. Call Fred 634638-664/visits 20 mile radius,Benidorm. We also buy PCs/computers

GARDENING GENERAL Garden Irrigation Systems. Supply and Install from 500 euros, 12 month guarantee. A cost effective way of watering the garden. Tel:-965-583-574 GENERAL GARDENING Palm Trees/Pine Trees, Tree specialist. Size not a problem. Quick with quality service. Plastic and gravel work. Economical prices. Free quote. Call:-634-625-792 Daniel TORREVIEJA GARDENING Palm trees, treat, clean, cut. Tel:-633-300-651 ALTEA-MORAIRA GARDENING Garden Rubbish removed from 40euros. All gardening and painting 8.75 per hour OR

priced work. Altea - Moraira Tel:-692-998-243 TEULADA/MORAIRA GARDENING Jon Cooper Garden Services.Clearance to regular maintenance. Hedging, graveling, etc. all aspects of garden maintenance. Most areas North Costa Blanca. email:joncooper@hotmail.co.uk 680-337-656 PEDREGUER GARDENING Garden design, maintenance and landscaping covering the areas of Pedreguer, Pego, Jalon, Els Poblets, Javea, Orba and Denia. 637-298-799 JAVEA GARDENING Perfect gardens Javea. Garden design. Tidy up. Hedges, Palms, Lawns, Irrigation, Gravel, Pools.

FULLY QUALIFIED UK ELECTRICIAN with 10 years experience on the CostaBlanca. All jobs undertaken-extra sockets, rewires, fault finding. Tlf:Hugh-690-275-223

LIVE IN HOUSEKEEPER Available for Cleaning, Shopping etc And Pet sitting in or around Moraira area. Serious applicants only.Tel:965-747-799 AVON NEED AGENTS AND LEADERS work hours to suit you. For info Phone Rosh 966-785-520 EXPERIENCED CARERS To Work In North Wales 2weeks On 2weeks Off Accommodation And Car Provided Strictly For Working Purposes Driving Licence And English Speaking Essential. Airfare Not Included. For Further Information Contact 628-769-892 Bernadette@ zinctek.com TORREVIEJA BRASILIAN LADY Mature, nice, reliable, seeking house works, elderly care, lonely men, friendship. 671-821-872 CARERS WANTED To work in England 3 weeks on 3 weeks off email CV to 24hourhomecareservices@ googlemail.com ADULT INTERNET PHOTO AND VIDEO Females and couples, 18-65, required as models. Excellent rates. Tlf:697-697-842

WILL THE EURO WEAKEN, FURTHER? Safeguard your savings, change to GBP. Legal, safe & private. Profitable, paid 8-10% interest, last decade. Requires offers 50K, plus. Details:petersharp4u@gmail.com

FURNITURE RESTORATION damaged in transit or just looking tired call david on 693-004-845

We offer 800€+contract Well known Company is Looking for sales rep, must have own vehicle and speak Spanish & English. 800€ + Contract offered. Tel: 673-108-140

SALES REP NEEDED Established ‘Toldos’ business is looking for sales rep with own transport. Must have good knowledge of Altea to Benissa areas and speak fluent English & Spanish. Contract offered. Tel: 673-108-140

13 - 19 may 2011 Professional service call: John on 606-711-587 GUADAMAR DEL SEGURA GARDENING El Raso Garden Services: Community, residential or holiday home garden maintenance with monthly plans, one off visits or specialized individual jobs covering all aspects of garden maintenance. Located at Manuel Ferrandez el Raso, 03170 Guardamar del Segura.Tel:620-585-783 CALPE GARDENING All gardening work undertaken from small general tidy up, to full landscaping services. Covering the areas of Calpe, Moraira, Javea and the surrounds. Tlf:-659-369-348

ANXIOUS-DEPRESSED? Find the cause and eliminate it permanently using Psychotherapy. Call San Luis Clinic 965-405-631/ 669-649-002 BECOME FREE OF ALCOHOL At The Sanctuary. Residential or day clinic, Crevillente. Call 965-405-631/ 669-649-002 TEETH WHITENING. Professional Pain Free Cosmetic Treatment, from 99€. Javea, Denia, Calpe, Benidorm areas. Tel:-966473-166 or 680-501-404. See www.nulookteeth.com

S.O.S. INSURANCE CarHome-Health-Comercial. Funeral Plans and Insurance. Tlf:-966-787123/622-275-561/ 686-116-297

MAHOGANY TABLE 6 chairs. €300. Glasstop table, 6 chairs €250. Garden Orniment business inclusive €500. Tel 650-554-908 AUTOMATIC GATE SYSTEMS €399!! Automatic Garage Doors €249!! Fully Installed/Guaranteed! All brands repaired 627-191-639/ www.elektro-nex.com STERLING ELITE MOBILITY SCOOTER with reverse facility, indicators, lights, horn and charger. 950€ + household goods.Tel:-610322-653-Denia HAIRDRESSING EQUIPMENT 1 backwash unit, Hood Dryer on Stand, Climazon Dryer Nearly New 1000€. Genuine Interest Only Tlf:-620-408-678 2 X MATCHING SOFA TABLES Circular, Diameter 60cm, Height 55cm, 3 legged pedestal base, Light oak finish. VCG. Altea area, Buyer collects. 50€ the pair. 691202-307 WHEELCHAIR Light, Foldable, Hardly used. 150€. Mobility Scooter 40km range 499€. Both like new! Tlf:-627-019-403

AT MICHAEL’S White Lshaped leather sofa. Two yellow leather sofas 3-seater + 2-seater. Large Chesterfield 4-piece high quality leather suite. www.michaels-javea.com AT MICHAEL’S we have a 1950´s style wall-mounted juke box that plays CD´s. Plasma TV, 42 “ . Professional electric stepper exercise machine. See photos www. michaels-javea.com AT MICHAEL’S you also get NEW high quality Spanish beds. All sizes available as we deal directly with the manufacturers! Famous brands like United Colors of Benetton, etc www.michaels-javea.com AT MICHAEL’S Two very high quality large desks with matching filing cabinet. NEW English high quality modern bed settee, very comfortable. www.michaels-javea.com MICHAEL’S 28 YEARS IN JAVEA ENSURES YOUR SATISFACTION! We sell high

quality pre owned furniture, many from show apartments etc. Look at: www.michaelsjavea.com Tlf:965-791-328.

WANTED INSTANT CASH PAID Antique and modern jewellery, vintage watches bought sold part exchanged, insurance valuations. Jewellery & watch repairs. Alexanders, Javea Port seafron near Bar Esquina. Established since 2003. Tel:965-792-595

G.S PARTY HIRE Planning a party. Do you need tables,cha irs,crockery,glasses. Outside catering and bar for all occasions. Then contact me for more information on.635-109375/693-371-654/966-194-984 BALLROOM/LATIN/ SEQUENCE DANCING La Rustika [Los Arcos] Restaurant, Avenida Baleares, Torrevieja. Monday, NEW BEGINNERS CLASS 10.30am 12.30pm: Tuesday: IMPROVERS LESSON 7.30m 8.30pm plus SOCIAL DANCE 8.30pm 10.30pm: Saturday SOCIAL DANCE 7.30pm 10pm.Casa Ventura, San Luis, Torrevieja. Thursday NEW BEGINNERS CLASS 7.30pm 9.30pm.Tel: Andrea & Brian:-616-478-157 WEIGHT WATCHERS Call our Free English call centre now to find your nearest meeting. 900-818-794

INDUSTRIAL CATERING EQUIPMENT chicken machine 1200euro,potatoe rumbler 600euro,8 pot cold tapa 700euro,bottle fridge 275euro, and more call 966-180-126 MOORING SPACE AVAILABLE to rent in Javea Fontana Marina. Telephone:606-936-012 or email:karensg8@gmail.com TRAILOR TWIN WHEELED 2.600 x 1.400 for a English car 550euros. Scaffold English Aliminum clips and boards covers 32mt x 2 lifts 550euros. Tel No:-965-730-774 QROPS FEES! Have you looked at transferring or cashing in your UK pension only to be dissappointed by expensive fees? If so call me. Lowest QROPS Fees Guaranteed! Paul 965-058-488 or 691-219-354 KARAOKE MEDIA PLAYER Special Offer 500GB. 80,000songs, software, songbooks, bar/home use. 195euros Tlf:-657-766-341 SINGERS, DJ\’S, KJ\’S 1TB media drive inc:-110k up to date karaoke tracks, 1k + M/F/ duet backing tracks, 500+music videos. 400+ music albums. Karaoke & DJ software etc etc. 225euros. CC accepted via paypal. call Paul . 659-511-951 BEV´S CAKES For all occasions, made to your specification. Alfaz/Benidorm areas. Call for more info 670-533-488 POOL, SNOOKER TABLES Also Table Tennis and Darts. Will beat any price!. Tlf:-666933-726. www.spainpool.com

ROYAL ENFIELD BULLET 500CC 1700Kms only. Many Extras, Spanish Registered, Insured, Fully Legal, One Owner. Half New price 2500€ Tlf:-606-075-644/966-786-858

WANTED I buy any car, van,Caravan,4x4 Etc.British, Spanish. Immediate cash 600781-873 ibuyanycar@hotmail. com BUMPERS, WINGS AND MIRRORS All body panels for all cars supplied. Tel:-966-877145 or 618-592-396 HEADLIGHTS4U.COM Left hand drive headlights supplied and fitted. All makes. Also air conditioning rechargeTel:-966877-145 or 618-592-396 LOOKING FOR A CAR? We have a nice selection of LHD and RHD Vehicles for sale or exchange from only 1500€, Automatics, Saloons, MPV´s, 4x4´s, Sports, Cariolets, and Commercials. New and used

Vehicles Sourced. Tel Frank your friendly English car sales on the Costa Blanca. Tel 600726-221/965-687-976 or simply view our easy to use website: www.fwreurocars.com BREAKERS YARD HGV, Vans, 4x4, Cars, Bikes. Most vehicle parts in stock. Delivery service for engines, etc. Vehicle sales and scrappage service. Free pick-up and transfer. Call 692-790-377. E-mail: hgmservices@yahoo.com WANTED Scrap cars, vans, lorries, plant and caravans. Turn your scrap into cash. Free collection. Tel.689-929-395

FINE FINISH DECORATORS All apsects undertaken, guaranteed work, free quotes and advice. cheap rates, Villajoyosa to Calpe. 617-619-710 PAINTOR AND DECORATOR Exterior/interior Spray Painting Specialist. Woodwork, iron work, all aspects. For a free friendly, no obligation quote call Kevin Guilfoyle. 965-831209/636-653-516 or Guifoyle. kev66@gmail.com

BMW X5 Sport

Sep ‘06 - Luxury 4x4. 3.0 Turbo Diesel Auto/Tiptronic 76,000 kms, 1 owner. Full service history. A/C (Climate), Met black, full cream sports leather. Loads of extras €POA 600-726-221/695-687-976

www.fwreurocars.com

13 - 19 may 2011

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13 - 19 May 2011

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13 - 19 may 2011

The final whistle With Andy Kay

RTN Golf Club update

www.andykayevents.com

PL knows FA about the Cup Dennis Jordan NORTH REGION

Mike Probert SOUTH REGION

FA Cup

THERE HAS always been something special about FA Cup final day. As a lad, I remember the coverage on BBC and ITV starting relatively early in the morning. We’d watch the players have breakfast at the team hotels, be with them as they boarded the coaches and then for the journey to Wembley. Once there, we’d enjoy countless pitch interviews plus a fashion critique on their cup final suits. Of course, back then, the FA Cup final was one of only a few games that were shown live on TV. Things are very different now. But that doesn’t explain why the Premier League has scheduled the potential title decider for a 12.45 kick off on cup final day. Let’s be clear here...the final between Manchester City and Stoke City has to take place at Wembley on Saturday as the Champions League final is on 28th May and Uefa rules state that the pitch for that game cannot be used 14 days prior: so far, so good. But don’t you think it would have made sense for the PL to stage the important games of the weekend on Sunday, leaving the cup final centre stage on Saturday? Perhaps to you and me, but not to the Premier League who surely cannot any longer say that there is no rift between themselves and the FA. If this is what friends do to each other, then what on earth will become of the game in England if they ever become enemies? Even if Manchester United loses to Blackburn (not that they have in their past 10 encounters, by the way) they will surely pick up a point at home to Blackpool to wrap up their 19th top flight title. Meanwhile at Wembley, Man City will be trying to win their first bit of silverware since 1976 and Stoke since 1972. The Premier League may be all powerful and the FA a mediocre bunch that couldn’t run a whelk stall. But I know which game I’ll be watching. WHERE’S THE EVIDENCE? Former FA and England 2018 chairman Lord Triesman has set the cat amongst the pigeons by accusing a number of Fifa officials of asking for ‘favours’ in return for World Cup votes. One of them, apparently, even had his sights set on a knighthood! Though the accusations are new, I don’t believe that anyone will be shocked by them. Fifa and its executive membership have a very murky past and the organisation has long been associated with grubby back hand politics. Let’s just hope that this time round, rather than being a case of one party stating that “he said this” and that party responding with a “no I didn’t” that Lord Triesman has some hard evidence to back up his claims. In fact, given Fifa’s past, I find it quite shocking that people wanting to do business with them don’t walk in to high level meetings with recording devices hidden in every orifice. Mind you, that might give them one more a**ehole to worry about!

Murcia Golf Hound Murcia Region

A BUSY week on the golf courses in the northern region of the Costa Blanca was not made any easier by the rain, thunder and lightning. But as usual it doesn’t take long for the weather to turn good and get the players back out there to use their rain vouchers, if the course closed for safety with the thunder and lightning or because the greens and bunkers needed to drain. Villaitana’s Par 72 Levante course has been closed this week due to sanding the greens, which in turn made the Par 62 Poniente very busy and virtually impossible to get a tee time. In general the courses on the Costa Blanca are very popular and in good condition. If anyone would like to book any discount tee times you can contacts us on 630 714 373. I HAVE been warning for some weeks now that May is the month for hollow tining on local courses and time has arrived with now fewer than TEN courses undertaking such work in my region. Vistabella completed their work in April and although the greens are still recovering it is well worth a game at only €78 for two players and 1 buggy (Monday-Friday) in a deal available only to RTN members. DEALS OF THE WEEK are at Mar Menor and Saurines De La Torre where the price has been reduced to only €185 for 4 players and 2 buggies. For your information I will be taking a family holiday from 18th - 25th May and my office will be closed so contact me before this to book your golf. THE PLEASURE was all ours this week as we took a trip into the Murcian countryside to play the golf course at Hacienda Riquelme. This is a golf course that simply has everything. Every aspect from tee to green was well maintained.As is typical of Nicklaus-designed golf courses, the placement of the bunkers, run-offs from and undulations in the greens mean players have to play strategically and have their short game in order. The selection of Par 3s is very strong and there are alsoplenty of chances for people to use their driver on the long Par 4s and Par 5s. It was a good experience just to play the course, but this was enhanced when we entered the new Clubhouse, located in a Spanish finca just off the 18th green. The modern restaurant area has a good atmosphere and a wide selection of food and drinks to relax with after your round - while there is also an upstairs area with sofas and televisions. With its excellent facilities and great all round golf course, Hacienda Riquelme has become a new favourite for the Murcia Golf Hound, and is yet another fantastic golf course to add to those already available in the Murcia region.

Golf Course

RTN Price

Comments

Alenda

€45

Single Green fee

Alicante Golf

€53

Single Green fee + Buggy

Bonalba

€42

Single Green fee

Don Cayo

€43

Single Green fee

El Plantio

€45

Single Green fee

Font del Llop

€40

Single Green Fee

Villaitana Par 62

€39

Single Green fee + Buggy

Villa Aitana Par 72

€45

Single Green fee

For more information email Dennis at dennis@roundtownnews.com or direct to www.benidormgolf.com on 630 714 373.

Golf Course

RTN Price

Comments

Altorreal

€55

2 PL and 1 Buggy (Mon-Fri)

Hacienda del Alamo

€96

2 PL and 1 Buggy

La Serena

€90

2 PL and 1 Buggy

Polaris World Courses

€92

2 PL and 1 Buggy

Roda

€98

2 PL and 1 Buggy (from 2pm)

Las Colinas

€94

2 PL and Buggy (3pm)

La Peraleja

€76

2 PL and 1 Buggy

For more information contact Mike at mike@roundtownnews.com or direct at Costa Blanca Green Fee Services on 966 704 752 or 661 345 931.

Golf Course

RTN Price

Comments

La Envia

€41

Single Green fee

Valle del Este

€70

2 Green fees

Aguilón

€40

Single Green fee

Alborán

€48

Single Green fee

Two night stay

€189

Almerimar

€60

Single Green Fee

Desert Springs

€65

Single Green fee

Two night stay

€189

2 night, 1/2board, 3 Green fees

2N, 1/2board,3Green Fees

For more information contact the Hound on Facebook, twitter: murciagolf@roundtownnews.com or 671 748 625.

ANYONE FOR FOOTBALL? Aged between 20 to 40 ? Torrevieja area Call Doug on 628 789 335

Change the rules - it makes sense Noel’s world of golf By Noel Eastwell Teaching Professional Campo de Golf El Plantio 639 730 891

GOLFERS ARE sticklers for the rules of the game and will be aghast at the headline above but think about some of the things we have to adhere to while playing our sport just for a minute. Why should we hit a perfect shot to the middle of the fairway and have to play a shot from there when we can get relief from a plugged lie even if the ball is in the rough but on a shortly mown area such as a mown path? Why do we have to play from a bunker when it is full of water or take the appropriate penalty shots because we cannot drop in the bunker without still being in water? These are just two of golfs most stupid situations and the most likely to happen to any of us at any time. The Royal and Ancient and The USGA are looking at the rules at the moment before bringing out the next edition of The Rules of Golf next February. I don’t envy their positions but they can make the game easier for everyone if they make the correct decisions now. There are many golfers who are like me and think the rules are too complicated and outdated. In the last year we have seen many situations where if the rules were clearer tournaments would have had much different outcomes. I refer to having waste areas that are basically sand and allowing people to ground their club as just one instance. Let the rules make all sandy areas on golf courses be treated as bunkers and then there can be no mistakes. Contrast this to the recent far too lenient punishment dished out to a Scottish Touring Professional recently. This case was where a number of fellow professionals who accused

him of not replacing his ball correctly on the greens and I hope you will all agree the game’s governing bodies need to do something to prevent people from being penalised when they should not be and conversely come down like a ton of bricks on those who blatantly cheat. Let us hope that this time they get the Rule Book closer to being fair and easier to understand: it will be another three years before they review the rules again. WIN A ROUND OF GOLF FOR 2 INCLUDING BUGGY AT THE BEAUTIFUL EL PLANTIO RESORT IN ALICANTE To enter this competition, simply answer the question below correctly. Every correct answer will be entered into a draw at the end of the month and the winner of this fantastic prize worth over 180€ will be picked at random at the end of each month. Send your entries by email to golf@roundtownnews.com. The decision of the editor of RTN will be final in making the winning selection. QUESTION FOR APRIL 13TH 2011: WHO WON THE 2010 US MASTERS? A. Phil Mickelson B. Martin Kaymer C. Graeme McDowell All answers must be received no later than 5pm on 31st May 2011 to be entered into May’s draw, to be made on 31st May. The winner will be announced in RTN on 3rd June 2011.

Any questions you have for Noel should be sent to golf@roundtownnews.com

Cast Off with

Robbie France

“Ships are the nearest things to dreams that hands have ever made.” Robert N. Rose

AHOY, SHIPMATES…and landlubbers! What a busy couple of weeks. First off…thanks for all your emails. Keep ‘em coming in. That’s what we’re here for: to help in any way, shape or form. Be it tidal patterns around a certain area, or even getting the pictures of your boat out to all the sailors on my email list. We are here 24/7. Anyway, it’s finally happened. D’ya remember a couple of weeks ago I stated that included in this year’s timetable was my desire to start solo sailing? Well - job done. We can tick off that particular box with an ALMIGHTY cross! I’ll explain… When we started talking to each other all those months ago, I mentioned my former preoccupation with golf. It was my religion 10 years ago. I played 5 or 6 times a week. Got my single figure handicap, blah, blah, blah… However, for all the camaraderie I enjoyed on the course with my pals, it was nothing compared with traipsing round 18 holes without a care in the world, playing 2 or 3 golf balls simultaneously, playing multiple shots out of bunkers etc., etc. On my own; early morning; nothing and no one around... Heaven…sheer bliss… Now move on to a couple of weeks ago. I casted off. Wound my way through the channels and

jetties at the marina, under the watchful eye of Malcolm, my mate. Hit open water…and that’s all she wrote! Unfortunately for me I was being spied upon my some people on the shore! It wasn’t until later that I realised I had a captive audience. Y’see…I was in a world of my own. Doing around 5 knots, (just under 6 miles per hour), completely unfettered by worrying about this or that, I opened up Karena. Do you remember Lewis Hamilton being cautioned by police in Melbourne last year for doing ‘360s’ and burning all that rubber? Child’s play! I went into overdrive with invention. One of the people stood on shore (watching me do ‘180s’, ‘360s’) said he thought it was one of the craziest things he’d ever seen. Can’t blame him. Clear sea. No traffic. Brisk wind. Hello? HELLO? In the end…I didn’t even bother using the winches, just held them in my hands as I tacked and jibed, jibed and tacked. No chatter. No distraction. Just me, Karena, the breeze, the sea, the sound of the bow wave slipping past as I cut through the swell. Heaven…sheer bliss... So. That’s one little ‘Job To Do’, less! Can’t wait for summer. Join me as I prepare to take the next step forward: The RYA Coastal Skipper Course.

Entre Naranjos hosts national bowls championships by Julie Day THE SPANISH National English Bowls Championships are being held from Saturday 14th May until Saturday 28th May at the Vistabella Golf complex on the Entre Naranjos Urbanisation. Approximately 350 bowls players hailing from autonomous communities all over the country including Andalucía, Cataluña, Murcia and Valencia will participate in this important competition, The Vistabella Bowls Club is extremely proud to hold an event of such calibre at their grounds and can’t wait to welcome other local and national players and spectators to their home area. The inauguration of this fantastic event will take place tomorrow, Friday 13th May at 5.30pm at the Vistabella Golf Club on the Entre Naranjos Urbanisation in Orihuela. For further details, please telephone 966 107 846 or email bookings@vistabellagolf.com

13 - 19 may 2011

Fishing Maggots End by

David Hoare

968 199 279

For further details ring Alan Roscoe 968 570 876 or email: anglerstogether@gonuts4free.com AGAIN THIS week, the match was held on the Rio Segura on the Eden canal stretch. The river was still in full flow, and up about a foot. This week’s match was the 4th round in the Summer Championship competition. Although the river was still pushing through, it fished well, with nearly every angler catching fish. Some were more unlucky than others though, as one of our members lost some 19 fish; enough to have easily won the day. Almost all anglers who fished the pole got caught up in the reeds, either the old broken stalks or new growth. This is because you cannot see where these are on the river bed. Until the river drops to its normal level this is going to be an ongoing problem. TOP RODS ON THE DAY 1st Stan (The Man) Roberts, fishing the feeder using maggot with 7.84 kg. 2nd Lenny (Ex Cultural Attache) Bolton, fishing the pole and using maggot with 6.60 kg. 3rd Clive (Golf no more) Cleghorn, fishing the pole using maggot with 6.00 kg. ABBEY ANGLING RESULTS supplied by Terry Screen The 4th Round Match of the Spring Series was fished at the Blanca Embalsa on 3rd May 2011. It was a lovely day for a change with the sun shining and the water calm, but the wind arrived as usual around 1pm. The water is regulated through the Dam, which I think could be operating a small Hydro-Electric generator as the water levels fluctuates about two feet a day. The fish seemed to be in patches with only 4 people catching on the day.

1st Mike (The Arsenal) Hill with 14.660kg on feeder and corn (Well Done) 2nd Ian (The Irish Wizard) Dalzell with 12.200kg on feeder and pellet 3rd Bill (The Master) Reade with 4.120kg on pole and pellet All details are available from the Match Secretary Terry Screen on 96 532 8368. Anglers Together ANGLERS TOGETHER was formed to introduce and encourage anglers of all abilities to meet up and get together to fish, either sea or freshwater. Firm friendships have been formed during the time the group has been active and information on fishing venues and licenses required are available at the meetings or by regular emailed newsletters. Meetings are held in two locations on the second Friday and Saturday of each month. Anyone with an interest in fishing (sea or freshwater) is welcome to come along to a meeting to see what we’re about. The next meeting at Mary’s Bar, Campoverde (near Pilar de la Horadada) will be held on Friday 13th May at 12 noon. There is a new venue for the Puerto de Mazarron meeting starting in January 2011. On Saturday 14th of May at 12 noon the meeting will be held at The New Royal Bar and Restaurant at El Alamillo, opposite the seafront between Isla Plana and the Port. NOTE The subs are now due at these meetings: €5 for renewal and €10 for new members. Refreshments and lunch are available at each location. Come along to a meeting nearest to you.