DEC 2013 - issue (35)
LOCAL BAND FEATURES - REVIEWS - GIGS - EVENTS - INTERVIEWS - GAMING - MOVIES - LIFE(STYLE) - FITNESS - ART - TV - DVD - OUT & ABOUT - MOBILE APPS - QU
LES FRITES PETITE > REDLINE THE SUNSET CLAUSE LIFE(STYLE) > MOVIES GAMES > TV > DVD > O&A FITNESS WITH
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T.O.D COACHING
CONTENT
ContentsDEC 2013 - issue (35)
WHAT’S INSIDE THIS MONTHS ISSUE...
- - - - - - - MUSIC - - - - - - -
- - - - - - - TV & DVD - - - - - - -
LES FRITES PETITE (pg4) REDLINE (pg10) THE SUNSET CLAUSE (pg12) MUSIC QUIZ (pg18)
DVD CHART (pg112)
New music quiz - answers on (pg174)
Some DVD’s being released this month
WHAT’S ON GUIDE (pg20)
GOGUIDE PICK OF CHRISTMAS TV (pg114)
TOP 10 DVD’S THIS MONTH
DVD WALL - OUT THIS MONTH (pg113)
What’s on in the local area.
DVD REVIEWS (pg126) THE PURGE / MONSTERS UNIVERSITY / DESPICABLE ME 2 / THE WORLDS END / THE WOLVERINE / ONLY GOD FORGIVES / INAPPROPRIATE COMEDY / HOW TO MAKE MONEY SELLING DRUGS
- - - - - - LIFE(STYLE) - - - - - WHY CINEMA IS STILL KING (pg28) 5-A-SIDES XMAS GIFT SPECIAL (pg32) FEEDMENOW - XMAS SPECIAL (pg56)
MOVIE YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED (pg135) James M’s MYMHM - EXCISION
PHONE APPS (pg60) CIRCLE / PNP PORTABLE NORTH POLE 2013 ANDROID/iOS APPS CHARTS (pg62)
- - - - - - - GAMES - - - - - - -
Our top 10 FREE and PAID apps charts for Android and iPhones.
GAME CHARTS (pg140)
Top 10 games across PLAYSTATION, XBOX and PC.
- - - FITNESS WITH T.O.D - - REVIEWS & FEATURES
CALL OF DUTY : GHOSTS (pg142) BATTLEFIELD 4 (pg148) ASSASSINS CREED IV: BLACK FLAG (pg152) PS4 FIRST IMPRESSIONS (pg156) FOOTBALL MANAGER 2014 (pg162)
STRENGTH TRAINING FOR RUNNERS (pg64) WITH T.O.D.
- - - - - - - MOVIES - - - - - - - - - - - - - OUT & ABOUT - - - - - - FEATURES
O&A (pg172)
MOVIE NEW RELEASES (pg74)
All the new releases in cinemas this month.
Out and about with some great indoor and outdoor stuff to get up to in the local area
This month its a new quiz - movie posters - answers on (pg175)
QUIZ ANSWERS (pg174)
MOVIE QUIZ (pg75)
THIS MONTHS BOXOFFICE TOP 10 (pg78)
Music and Video Quiz answers
REVIEWS
CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS (back page 176)
FILTH (pg80) GRAVITY (pg84) THE HAUNTING IN CONNECTICUT 2 (pg90) THE LAST EXORCISM PART II (pg96) OLDBOY (pg100) THOR 2 (pg104) THE HUNGER GAMES 2 (pg11082)
We take a look back at some classic movie posters.
FEEDMENOW LES FRITES PETITE
Who are GOGUIDE...???
REDLINE
We try to ensure our information is correct before uploading but some details are subject to change. PLEASE check online or with each location directly for fully up to date information.
GOGUIDE is a local online magazine for the West Lothian area. We try to be less focused on local ‘news’ and more a targetted on, ‘what’s on’ or ‘happening’ in the local area. We do try to have a pretty modern approach to GoGuide content and eventually hope to produce articles on subjects outside our usual stuff such as Clubbing, Theatre, Internet, Sport etc.. With the vast majority of our content sourced from local contributors we are always on the lookout for new people to join us and help provide input to this content hungry mag so if you’re keen on writing stuff and getting it published in the mag feel free to drop us a message at content@goguidemagazine.co.uk
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THE SUNSET CLAUSE
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
J M RECORDINGS offers high quality, polished recordings at very reasonable price across ALL genres. Working with full bands, duo’s and solo artists is never a problem and there are special rates for multiple track recordings such as EP’s or Albums. For a quote please email me with your band name as the subject and include how many songs you would like to record, ideal recording dates and any website info. I also offer remixes, mastering and tracking services, please email for a quote. If required, drum tracks are recorded at a location/studio of your choice with bass,guitars and vocals all tracked and mixed at my Edinburgh based home studio.
www.facebook.com/jmrecordings www.soundcloud.com/jm-recordings
www.jmrecordings.co.uk bookings@jmrecordings.co.uk - JM Recordings - Edinburgh - Scotland DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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MUSIC
FEATURE
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
I
f it’s one thing that us West Lothian punters are good at it’s doing stuff ourselves, due mostly to being pretty much universally ignored by any real musical influences, organisations and bodies across Scotland, we’ve a long history of living with the DIY ethic and have been putting on our own gigs, running our own clubs, organising music/art festivals for more years than I can remember all with very little or no support from the local council and or community funded arts groups etc. Gees the Livi Skatepark is our talisman for our DIY heritage seeing as it would pretty much not have happened had it not been for that very DIY ethic. So kudos to all those guys who ignore the fact they get ignored themselves and do stuff ‘themselves’.
I’ve done a lot of the same things over the years and a few years ago I worked with a host of local artists and bands and produced a compilation album called ‘Saying Goodbye to Shoppingtown?’ which had 1000 copied distributed FREE throughout the local area. We even managed to get it into the wee Virgin shop in the centre, mainly as no one else would stock it which was an amazing coup. Not surprisingly though they were the only one in a massive amount of places who flatly refused to help. Worst of all it’s a strange feeling to go into a so called record shop, a big one, with three letters in the name, you know who I mean? And ask them if they wouldn’t mind taking some FREE cd’s for them to give away to their punters? Just stick one in people’s bags for FREE, or just leave them on the counter for people to take one if they want, its FREE? Proper CD’s, jewel cased, cover front and back, real CD’s man, No extra work involved for your staff…. No problems? I’ll just leave a few boxes here yeh?... Strange to then leave the place with the same amount of CD’s that you went in with and a definite feeling of being a wee bit dirty. Anyway I digress but it nicely brings me to the real subject of our feature and that is the new 12 track album release from a bunch of local guys under the banner of ‘Les Frites Petites’ (loosely translated as ‘Small Fries’).
The project has brought together a collection of local musician, artists & songwriters to work together on a few West Lothian based projects, the main one being a pretty cool music compilation imaginatively titled ‘Vol 1’…. come on guys? Really? Vol 1 features various tracks from a bunch of local and ‘visiting’ artists for your timely festive pleasure, not that it’s a Xmas album but hey its perfect timing as a gift for those hard to please people in your life, get them this, how can they not love you for it. The twelve tracks featured include a lot of people we’ve worked with over the years and a bundle of new faces for us, in fact a track from one, Ross Mitchell, actually featured on ‘Saying Goodbye to Shoppingtown’ all those years ago. Being mainly an acoustic album with a couple of band recordings thrown in for good measure Vol 1 is a pretty easy listen and for the most part the quality of the songs, song writing and musicianship on offer is absolutely amazing and is a truly remarkable achievement for all those involved. The guys should be well chuffed with how things have turned out and I’m sure they must be chomping at the bit for Vol 2, 3, 4 just as much as I am, maybe the first small steps in someone producing a ‘Now that’s What I Call LOCAL Music’ annual series. You can have that one if you want guys.. ;-)
TRACK 1 - adullboy - Do You Remember The 80's? Kicking off the album is fine gentleman Adullboy, a local acoustic singer songwriter who is part of a new wave of artists who have been busy beavering away extensively in the local scene over the past couple of years and who is now coming into focus more thanks to places like Armadale’s The Corrie Bar live nights (arranged and hosted by Ross Mitchell himself). ADB, or Robin Crosbie, to give him his Sunday name, offers up really nice slice of acoustic folk/pop in opener ‘Do You Remember The 80's?’. The track seem, on the surface anyway, to be the perfect catchy, toe tappy wee ditty to kick things off, but when you throw into the mix some of ADB’s quirky and well thought out lyrics it truly lifts the track to a completely different level and I for one found myself inadvertently reminiscing over almost every line as it was delivered in what is quickly becoming Mr Crosby’s trademark ‘sitting chatting to you in the pub over a pint’ style. I recommend picking up a copy of his Local Zero EP on DL if you can and you’ll get what I mean.
WWW.LESFRITESPETITES.BANDCAMP.COM DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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TRACK 2 - Wullie Mammoth - Factory (part 1) Wullie Mammoth, real name or not, wins the crown for most awesome band name on this album and almost wins the best track award as well thanks to his little ditty Factory (Part 1) which I’m lost to describe in any other way but ‘eclectic’. I know what I like and I like it… simple, hypnotic, hooky, smart... pretty special, it’s really got a lot to like… sounds like a demo BUT gets away with it… I’ll get into that later.
TRACK 3 - Combie - I Kissed The Sun I Kissed The Sun is a track from local musician Combie that also appears on his Bad Habits Don't Cost a Penny – EP, which, for some strange reason, seems to have been released solely on that sh*t platform called iTunes? Well I couldn’t find it anywhere else to pick up a copy and I so loathe those Apple people so I remain Combie’less for the time being. Having featured and reviewed his band Noise Annoys a while back I’ve got a pretty good idea at what to expect although there does seem to be a wee bit of experimentation going on in the Combie camp with excursions into home-made cigar box guitars ‘n’ stuff making an appearance… not sure its diluting his repertoire or not? Hmmmm. I kissed the Sun starts of as a mellow, whispey acoustic rock song and kinda stays true to that all the way through even down to the crunching lead break when it hits. There is definitely an American Flavour in there somewhere but overall the vibe has a classic Brit Rock stamp all over it.
TRACK 4 - Lovers Turn To Monsters - Skeletor Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god…. wait… deep breathe… Ok let’s go… One of the truly sparkling lights on this album is the inclusion of any Lovers Turn To Monsters tracks, and I do mean ANY LTTM tracks. But how the hell do you pick just one LTTM track to include in an album? I don’t envy that job one bit…. I for one couldn’t do it. Not only that the guys is amazing, but that with about a dozen self-released albums and 100’s of songs to choose from where do you start? So whoever picked Skeletor is frankly a genius, un véritable genie… Just listen to the track man, what can I say that would make it any better… it truly will change your world if even only for a day. Just listen to it…. Then maybe go listen to every one of this kids songs (he is and always will be a kid to me). There is more creativity on one of LTTM’s home recorded cassette tapes than all of the X Factor contestants releases put together since it started and for the next decade. I can’t really recommend any higher for anyone remotely interested in amazing, creative, touching, funny and thought provoking song writing to seriously have a listen to LTTM. Neil Hannon, eat your heart out.
TRACK 5 - Ryan Morcombe - Closer Track 5 Closer by Ryan Morcombe reminds me a wee bit of a kinda mashed up folk version of Lloyd Cole. A classic story telling songwriter who uses his talents to drag you in to his own wee world of human fragility. Pain and beauty all at the same time and a wee bit of moothie thrown in for good measure (you can’t have an acoustic album without moothie, it’s in the Musicians Union handbook: ED) It’s a laid back affair which is easy to get lost in as it ambles along laying bare its fatal story.
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TRACK 6 - The Boy With The Lion Head - I'll Hide All The Things That Remind Me Of You I like a strange name every now and then and it’s good to see a nice collection of strange names making an appearance on this release. We’ve mentioned one of my all-time local artists LTTM previously and now it’s the turn of The Boy With The Lion Head who let me just say this up front… GENIUS… yep that’s right GENIUS, (Really? ED) well ok… Genius then, second only to one true GENIUS, Boletes, as the most amazingly original acoustic artists in this current generation of local singer songwriters, a man with canny knack of making an already perfect song simply sparkle, by the addition of a flipping wee stick and some metal. I'll Hide All The Things That Remind Me Of You is a more traditional offering from TBWTLH with just a simple acoustic guitar laying down a sombre carpet of sound, like a carpet laid in front of the fire for you to sit on and stare at the flames dancing in the fire and to contemplate. Oh… and there’s moothie… more moothie. Why does a moothie never sound out of place? Do seek out the rest of the TBWTLH catalogue as you most definitely won’t be disappointed with what you find. TRACK 7 - Craig Weir - Day In May Craig Weir is a new one on me, but there is certainly something sweet going on behind that overly long fringe. Day In May rounds on us as a typical acoustic, folky, indie, rock, love song delivered in the obligatory semi colloquial phrasing style that is ‘all the rage’ at the moment but it’s actually refreshing to find someone looking to use it as a ‘dusting’ as opposed to the Twin Atlantic/Nutini ‘we sing like we talk’ school of vocals technique. It suits the song style and vibe for it to have a cleaner delivery and there’s load of promise in Craig’s toolbox and I for one am looking forward to hearing/seeing more from him in the future. Almost used lunchbox there as an analogy but decided against it? Better? Perhaps the only thing I’d have preferred with this track and maybe on 1 or 2 of the others would have been a remaster of the track as compared to most of the tracks on the album this recording sounds like a demo, sorry mate, but there is so much a good recording setup (and engineer) can bring to an acoustic recording to give it the body and range it needs and to make it punch through, and the good thing? Well it only costs the same amount of time in the studio that it takes a typical drummer to set up. Kudos on everything else though, great effort. Gees, rereading this it sounds like I’m saying this is bad but honestly I’m not… really I’m not. TRACK 8 - Ross Mitchell - New York Hmmmm…. Now to the Daddy? The Main Man? The Head Honcho? the Ray Winstone of the bunch. Mr Ross Mitchell has it all really, ahhhhh…. he just shouldn’t be this good. I have a guitar, I can sing a wee bit…. all I ask is for just a wee bit of his magic and I’d be a happy chappy… he’s a pure c*nt. Awesome vocalist, awesome songwriter, awesome musician, awesome dude... have I said awesome too much? (YES: ED), ok fine. Focus…. What can you say about Mitchell’s offering on this album? Well, without a shadow of doubt New York would sit perfectly well on any pop singer songwriter’s album that has been in the charts over the past decade. Not only sit on it but I’m guessing would be prime single material for most. It’s such a cool and classy track that I’d guess if you bumped into it in the pub one night it would be wearing a dinner suit, and a crisp white shirt unbuttoned, the ones for a bow tie, oh but it wouldn’t be wearing the bow tie… nope… and it would have a wee white folded hanky sticking out of its top pocket, and shiny shoes, don’t forget the damn shiny shoes. The bow tie would be in the hand of the stunning blonde who had removed it earlier on and she was now draped on its f’ing left arm, while another stunning redhead clings onto its right arm, pouting at you as New York just looks over at you and mouths… I KNOW…!!!! That’s bloody New York.
WWW.LESFRITESPETITES.BANDCAMP.COM DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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TRACK 9 - Brian Gatens - Only Been A Week Brian Gatens is another newbie for me and with him hailing from the hometown of my cousin’s old band, The Dykeenies, and twinned with Beirut… yep Cumbernauld… it isn’t on my radar so not being from the local area I’m gonna pretty much draw a blank on dishing any dirt here haha. Only Been A Week is a pure slice of folk/pop with all the elements that you’d expect from it; simple melody, engaging story and a fair wee bit of a singalong breaks thrown in for good measure. Again another track that for me would have benefitted from a wee remix to bring its full potential to life.
TRACK 10 - Kick The Hornets Nest - For You Kick The Hornets Nest is another killer name for a music project… band or solo artist? Not sure? Maybe I’m not supposed to reveal any details so I’ll stay clear on this one ;-) Knowing the person(s) involved (see what I did there) in KTHN and on previous works, although this is my first hearing of For You it’s kinda a strange song? Not what I would have expected, but then again sorta exactly what I would have thought might happen. It’s a song and a style that I feel leans more towards the less lovey dovey side of the semi-acoustic folk/rock/punk scene. Properly reminds me of young Billy Bragg’esque type stuff but maybe slightly less ‘obviously’ political? Or maybe not, maybe KTHN are bludgeoning me with subversive politics and I just can’t see it? Either way it’s chock full of nice wee twist and turns and again another one that I’d love to have heard with a good remix on it, nothing too drastic just some stuff to ‘outline’ the relevant points needed to really make the song stand out. Yeh, good song, good guy, loads of promise and I’m off to checkout some more Kick The Hornets Nest before I do the next few tracks.
TRACK 11 - Electrolite - In Line Now I’ve heard of Electrolite before but really thought they were a distant memory? So it is either a strange surprise to find this song on here or i’m getting my bands completely mixed up. From listening to In Line I was pretty sure it was the same band, but maybe not so I started the 2 hour hunt for info... which left me none the wiser to be honest? We all know Facebook is SH*T for searching for people you don’t already know… yeh and when a google search for “electrolite band West Lothian Bathgate” gets 2 results – one a 2008 link to a Rock Platform showcase and the 2nd a ‘Myspace’ page, yep a Myspace page, not really up to date either. Man i loved Myspace for bands, why didn’t bands stay there? Facebook didn’t want you going over to their house anyway so why move to Facebook? God… Myspace and Twitter was a perfect solution for Bands. Anyway let’s review the song shall we. In Line shows a polished band at work in much the same way that New York by Ross does and it’s a super strong track with great harmonies and musicianship across the boards. A really nice hooky chorus/break but it’s all a little too dated for me. I’d really like to see the guys (or gals) push the boundaries a little more which I know they can clearly do based on this song, a good track so show us how good you CAN be so let’s see what the next offering from the band brings. Super kudos though just needs dragged, kicking and screaming into today… just sayin.
WWW.LESFRITESPETITES.BANDCAMP.COM Page 8
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
TRACK 12 - Andy Robertson - Falling Down I like Andy Robertson, he’s a cool dude and Falling Down is like, a frickin awesome wee track. Now first off… before I start…. for all the other artists I’ve mentioned about remixes… yeh? Listen to this as an acoustic recording, this is what they should/could all sound like at the very least for an album track anyway. I love rough copy demos more than life itself but for compilations it only helps you guys if the tracks are the best they can be, to make them stand out on their own merits and work on the same playing field as everyone else. Rant over…. Sorry. Andy’s track Falling Down shows just what an amazing musician and songwriter this young man is. It really is a special and accomplished piece of music from someone so damn young (and good looking), it just washes over you as you listen, never ever feeling the need to push itself down your throat, or to have you feeling anything other than truly peaceful. Such a soulful, passionate and powerful vocalist who only gets better the more you listen to him. Strangely this song isn’t the best Andy Robertson track out there if you ask me? Nope… check out Slip Away if you can. I’m not very good at English a so can’t really put into words how good it is so I’ll leave it up to you. I do hate it when songs leave you with a lump in your throat though….. are they supposed to do that? So… a masterful track to end the album with and what has been a 2 day journey for me, so well done Les Frites Petites and a massive thank you for bringing this amazing collection of songs and artists to the table for myself and hopefully a tonne of others to feast on. So, so, so looking forward to Vol 2, keep it up guys. Amazing, simply amazing.
Les Frites Petites? Incroyable, Tout Simplement Incroyable.
Words by Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
Words by Christopher Jordan for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
REDLINE (AKA ROBERT TROTMAN) This month, GoGuide met up with Dubstep/D’n’B artist and ‘Bass 2 Mouth’ resident DJ ‘Redline’ to ask about the electric madness he constantly endures.
How would you describe your music?
other hobbies?
Bassy, under a D'n'B style as it sets the par for production. Nowadays, some of the best production comes from Drum and Bass.
To keep pushing, if you have the determination to want to progress/ enjoy what you do, you'll only get better.
Who are your favourite artists at the moment?
Have you ever played a show totally wasted?
Noisia for sure! Also Audio, Black sun empire, Calyx and Teebee, Ed Rush & Optical, Spore and Neosignal. Do you listen to any other genres? Yeah, I listen to dubstep, house, metal and all their sub-genres. Drum and Bass is my favourite style but it's not all I listen to. What advice would you give to anyone struggling with music or
AY E R right, aye! (Good man.) Fuckin' The lastIG show I was fucked! I'd had;-) H of buckfast and wasED two bottles T RFor the O drinking pints allCnight long. S first show we did, CEweNENSallOtook AMT (alpha-Methyltryptamine). was HT REThat naw, G I probably a bad idea, … actually, D E Rdefinitely a bad idea. Total;-)fail! AitYwas Can you tell us a little about your writing process? I've got a folder full of patches which DEC 2013 - issue (35)
I made myself, so I always have something to get straight to work on. How long have you been doing this? About five months now. It's great to be able to work with the people in the scene and it's all going pretty well. Don't the dancing girls distract you when you play? Nah, I'm more distracted by trying not to mess up because of being to drunk or whatever. That, and people making requests for songs. : / Where would be your favourite place to play a set? Outlook festival in Croatia would be awesome! PAGE 11
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B
eing quite a fan of The Sunset Clause I was more than happy to find out that the guys had a local ‘bloodline’ within the band as it meant I could cover the guys in the mag, not 100% sure why we didn’t already know they were local, must be slipping in my old age, although I have been living quietly for the past couple of years so that’s my excuse. Hailing from no fewer than 3 local towns in the area, although impressively only 1 of the ‘burns’, well I think it is quite of an achievement anyway. I was actually first introduced to the Sunset Claus music by another local band whose name for some reason escapes me at the moment, but I’m so, so glad they did, so thank you for that, whoever you were. It will come to me in the middle of the night so hopefully I’ll include it before the end of the article. When I first heard Hurricane Party, released way back in January 2012, to say that what I heard blew me away would be a wee bit of an understatement, if I recall correctly I think a wee bit of wee came out. The debut offering recorded by the guys themselves after a week long stint in a college studio if I’m not mistaken is properly chock full of songs that other bands, and I mean other
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signed bands, would probably kill for. The true potential oozing out of this band really confuses me? I’m not really sure if it makes me glad that we have these kind of amazing local bands making really amazing music that we can enjoy virtually on our doorstep OR if it makes me truly despair that the ‘popular music’ charts are filled to the brim with…. well ummmm…. p*sh when compared to this. Sure the tracks on the EP are anything but the finished article, they are after all really no more than a bunch of demo tracks that have been crammed together to showcase the bands material. And it’s that material that excites me so much. EP opener ‘Horror Can't Catch’ sticks the Sunset Clause flag firmly in the indie rock field and starts shouting out loudly that ‘hey…were over here…!!!!’, is sorta a defining track as it’s just as for me it’s what the guys do best and is just as good a tracks as the ones the guys are releasing just now (if not better, but don’t let them know I said that: ED). Track 2 ‘The A-List’ stays on a similar, keep it simple, indie rock vibe, with a less jangly and more rock feel. Kicking off with a Status Quo’esque slow rocky kinda theme next up is ‘Twist Of The Knife’, which throws the bands quirky side of things out there for us to digest and I must confess I do like it kind sirs, keep it up. ‘Blueprint’ next is a jump back to a core indie rock tune but defo something I’d like to hear remastered at some point as it has all the right elements to be a pretty kick ass tune, just suffers from a pretty messy unseparated mix. Finishing track ‘Lights Of The City’ is an acoustic ‘bonus’ track that if anything shows that the guys are more than happy to show the softer side of things and happy to be seen in the buff so to speak, a really nice track and with a wee bit of falsetto thrown in for good measure it bodes well for the future. You know, when I first listened to this old EP, DEC 2013 - issue (35)
I can remember thinking that there were 3 things that were clearly evident throughout and I’d like to point out those 3 things as they really do shine through every one of the tracks on that debut EP. I’ll start off with the songs themselves. Every track is very different from the one before, different but you know it’s The Sunset Clause, there is no mistaking the guys have a unique sound and one that doesn’t necessarily sit in any particular genre too easily, which for me is a good thing. The tracks also show off to great effect the bands knack of writing a really good song. The writers at Motown, who were in fact just paid employees yeh? A wee group of guys in a room, wrote all those classic tunes that everyone knows so well and they were writing to pretty strict formulas with one important one being that all their songs had to have no less than 5 hooks, that’s 5 yeh. So when you listen to a Motown track you should hopefully be able to recognize and remember 5 separate bits from each track. The idea being that you could remember the hooks more easily than the songs perhaps, whatever it was it worked as everyone knows loads of bits from Motown songs right? It might be an intro, a bass line, a repeated lyric, a beat section, a backing vocal, guitar lick, horn section… anything really try it the next time you hear one, you should be able to pick out a few. Too many modern musicians rely on one aspect and tend to neglect the rest. The second standout for me is the pretty top notch musicianship from all the guys, they are tight, tight as a knats you know what, and nothing seems to be trying to outplay anything else on the tracks, all the guys seem to be going all out to make it about the sum of the whole rather than about one particular part which is good to see from young musicians. They are also not afraid of using SPACE… if you know what I mean;
WWW.THESUNSETCLAUSE.COM The Sunset Clause and the equaly awesome Penfold (who will get to eventually..!!!) DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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the ‘less is more’ thing sometimes takes a while to get to grips with for us musicians? Did I just say ‘us’ musicians? Strike that from the records m’lord. I’ve never been and probably never will be a musician; I couldn’t lace any of our local bands boots. Third thing that I wanna highlight, and despite my previous comment about everything being aimed at the ‘overall’ sound of the music, I unfortunately have to pick out one person as a complete stand out and that is of course frontman David Robb. Awww man…. Just love his delivery and the uniqueness of his voice, it truly just lifts all the tracks on to another level. When you have someone as good as this in you band it puts a pretty big ingredient in that recipe for success in the music business, and I really do hope that some sort of success coms the way of these 4 guys as they really deserve it. As if my gushing’s about Hurricane Party weren’t enough, jump forward a few months to summer 2012 and the guys kinda hit a home run with their next awesome double single? No I’m not saying that, it’s a 2 track EP… wait… is it a Double A Side single? Let me check… ok it’s a Double A Side Single, that’s what the guys call it so let’s just call it that ok. Recorded by the awesome Jamie Savage over at Chem 19 studio's in Hamilton and funded by an Arts Council ‘Demo’ grant ‘Lovers Eyes/ These Nights’ is a stonker of a record, ‘Lovers Eyes’ in particular is just an awesome track. From the opening bars of guitar lines to the amazingly engaging tones of Robb’s opening lines it just sends shivers down my spine when I hear it. This is The Sunset Clause how they should sound and kudos to Savage for bringing it all together and producing a massive sounding piece of work. There really isn’t anything missing at all here, a perfect track if you ask me and there isn’t anything that has graced the charts in the past 2 years that is better than this. ‘These Nights’ has an overall more aggressive tone but still balances out well against its opposite track, a simpler more in your face ‘mosh’ track. And on the subject of ‘moshing’, Live The Sunset Clause are everything you’d hoped and more, it is pretty evident that the guys all love playing together and love getting in front of a crown and doing what they do best. They have played in all the ‘fanciest’ places and some dives too, even gracing our very own Grassroots stage this September which pleased me no end as they were, to put it blunt, kick f*ckin ass. So that’s it, The Sunset Clause in 1500 words… well not quite. As if that wasn’t enough awesomeness for us summer 2013 saw the guys hit the studio again and thanks to the team that brought you Lovers Eyes we are smacked firmly in the face with 3 track EP ‘Take Offs & Turbulence’ which when played reinforces all that stuff that I knew was true about The Sunset Clause… they are f*cking awesome. ‘Firing Line’ is just amazing, I absolutely love this track and I’m struggling to pick out the right words and phrases to tell you why it is just so good, but I can’t... f*cking damn you rudimentary grasp of English, why didn’t I listen at school. ‘Will You Be My Audience?’ sees the rockier side of things coming to fruition for the guys and we see just how good they can be at a simple, high tempo, full on rockout, I knew they could do it, they just wanted to rub my nose in it Milk, Lemonade, Chocolate as they say in Craiglang. ‘Ghosts, Pt. 1 & 2’ is a track that shows just how mature as songwriters this band are right now, this is like 2nd album material from a typically signed band. Just staggering and I love playing this with the volume turned up to eleven, much to my neighbour’s annoyance, well they are a good bit older than I am to be fair and they can’t quite grasp The Clause’s greatness yet, I am working on it... keep you posted.
Words by Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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FEATURE
GOGUIDE INTERVIEW: GG: How did the band name come about, any amazing, heartwarming or uplifting story behind it?
TSC: Queue the cheesy music as we walk you through our multiple-personality-underdog tale!.. We originally were called ‘Weekend City Scene’, but at gigs no one can make that out over the noise. So we opted for ‘Hurricane Party’ instead and all seemed good and well, UNTIL we were approached by some folks informing us the name had already been used by a now broken up band and due to ‘The Sunset Clause’ in the contract the old manager had the rights to the name and such, so we decided to name ourselves after the thing that stole our name and we lived happily ever after! Fin. GG: How long have you been a band? TSC: We’ve been playing together through the array of different names for about three years now. GG: Who are the members, what do they do in the band and how did you all meet? TSC: Ingredients include: David – Vocals & Guitar; Michael – Guitar & Vocals; Matthew – Drums & Vocals and Benji – Bass and Vocals. We all met at high school but it wasn’t until the very end of sixth year that we decided to form a band, it was kind of the love child of the ashes of another band and a drunken conversation. GG: So far where has been the best place you have played LIVE apart from your recent mountaineering efforts which we will cover later? TSC: That’s a tough one! Tut’s was a great experience for us and definitely a show we hold in high regard but for favourite it’s kind of a toss-up between a Bannerman’s show late last year alongside the lovely fella’s in Academy Strangers or playing out in the open at Party in the Park… The people who hosted the stage just made us feel right, y’know? And, we had our band romance rekindled with Penfold. It’s the best sort of love. GG: Who are the major influences for the band? TSC: We’re pretty up in the air for that! Ranging from Mumford & Sons to The Who to Blink 182 and everything inbetween! GG: Describe your sound in three words? TSC: Verse Chorus Verse GG: What song of yours best sums up the band? TSC: The final track on our EP; ‘Ghosts’ GG: Every band hates being pigeon holed... if you had to pick a genre for yourself what would it be? TSC: Well, last night some guy who’d never heard us before came up and said “I love it, it’s like Punk-Rock-Folk music!” but we usually note ourselves as ‘Scotrock’.
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: THE SUNSET CLAUSE GG: What do you think of the Scottish music scene just now?
TSC: We love it, it’s turned in to a nice wee community with a lot of bands looking out for each other and stuff, it’s great to be a part of! GG: What local/unsigned bands do you like at the moment? TSC: There Will Be Fireworks’ Album could potentially be one of the best things to grace our ears in a long time, huge fans of all their stuff to date! Bringing it more Local, we always love to hear our ‘boiiiiz’ Penfold! ‘And The Beast’ by them is probably one of my favourite tracks this year. GG: You recently climbed, or is it walked? and played on top of Ben Nevis, how did that come about and why? TSC: Climbed sounds more adventurous, let’s go with that! The how and why is kind of my bad (Benji), I had this idea of doing something kind of ‘out there’ with the band and my mum had just moved up to Fort William. Having already done the climb twice before the two things fell together, then we got CHAS (Childrens Hospice Association Scotland) onboard and managed to raise a healthy sum of money for a great cause on our mini adventure! All round win really. GG: The amazing Lover's Eyes was released back in spring 2012, Take Offs & Turbulence in summer this year, is there a seasonal theme going on? and does that mean we have to wait until winter 2014 for new stuff or have you got something nice up your Xmas sleeves? TSC: Only time will tell!.. Nah, we’ve got a boat load of new material in the works and hoping to record early 2014! As for Christmas, we’ve got some little presents up our sleeves for you all, ‘cause we’re nice like that. GG: Overall what have you got in store for 2014? TSC: EVERYTHING! (Or there abouts), we’ve kind of taken a small break the last few months due to numerous reasons but now we’re back on track with big plans! You’ll hopefully be seeing a lot of our faces over the next year… Sorry about that. GG: If you could tour with anyone past or present who would it be? Individually or as a band you choose? TSC: Michael – Elton John “That’d be awesome!” Matthew – Nirvana “I want to know what was going on in Kurt Cobain’s head.” Benji – Queen “They’d upstage us a hundred times over and I wouldn’t even be mad.” David – Status Quo “I like turtles.” GG: What’s the best song you’ve heard this year? TSC: “Can’t Hold Us” by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis… That whole album is just genius. GG: Will the band be sticking to any New Year resolutions this year? TSC: We’re going to work on finishing our senten… DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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D N I M R E V NE ’S T I S K C O L THE BOL
MUSIC QUIZ
THE D I U GOG C I S MU QUIZ
1
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2
NAME THE SONG s cloud lyrics the classic song Try to identify have ht ig clouds, we m from our song e or m e th of two removed one or not e ar ey th so st ju ‘obvious’ words too easy...
3
NAME THE ALBUR COVE
really, we’ve Pretty obvious tist names all the telling ar ow album kn l el from some w our younge iTunes pics for
ms m Tell us the ambu easy...!!!!
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4
5
DE C Z 6
8
7
9
E E UM RS
e removed s and titles ms (or CD’s/ er readers)
man...
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WHAT’S ON
WHAT’S ON...
DECEMBER
MUSIC
CHECKOUT OUR EVENTS PAGE @ WWW.GOGUIDEMAGAZINE.CO.UK/WORDPRESS/EVENTS-CALENDAR OR THE BANDS & VENUES SITE FOR FULL DETAILS
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WHAT’S ON
WHAT’S ON...
DECEMBER
MUSIC
CHECKOUT OUR EVENTS PAGE @ WWW.GOGUIDEMAGAZINE.CO.UK/WORDPRESS/EVENTS-CALENDAR OR THE BANDS & VENUES SITE FOR FULL DETAILS
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PAGE 23
CHECK ONLINE FOR YOUR AREAS NEXT EVENT
www.facebook.com/pages/Rock-a-Buy-Baby-Kids-Market
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CHECK DATES ONLINE
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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LIFE(STYLE) FEATURE
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WHY CINEMA IS STILL KING FEATURE
KING
CINEMA IS STILL THE UNDISPUTED KING OF PASTIMES AND IT IS ONLY GETTING BETTER
image: HIPPODROME CINEMA BO’NESS / The Pollock Hammond Partnership Page 28
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W
e live in an age of technological wonder – there is so much out there and so much to experience, and naturally, so many opportunities to waste leisure time. The invention and growth of the internet has allowed procrastination levels to soar to record-breaking all-time highs. Hours have been spent by millions of people looking at lolcats, sitehopping through Stumbleupon, mindlessly browsing Facebook or YouTube surfing so much that they end up on the appropriately dubbed ‘weird side’ of YouTube. Smartphones don’t help either. You can do all of the above on a smartphone and/or download countless apps and games to help you pass the time – and all that time adds
up. The taking, cropping filtering and hash tagging of every meal on Instagram whilst you’re at a restaurant, the careful wording, rewording and hashtag abusing on Twitter whilst you’re pretty much anywhere and the carefully and geometrically assessed angle of trajectory in Angry Birds whilst you’re on the toilet. We all waste time and in this day and age, time is precious. We rarely get real leisure time and it’s even rarer when that leisure time falls at a time when all of your friends are free too. There are many ways that a group of friends can kill some time together, there’s online console gaming (although that’s not technically together, it counts), crazy golf, shopping, going out for a meal or bowling. All of these pastimes are (for the most part) a fun way to spend time, but they are inefficient. They all offer pretty much the same experience each time. Plus, they all allow for your precious friend-time to be overshadowed and second-placed to the likes of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and various other pseudo second-life traps. But there is an answer out there, the king of leisure time, and that king’s name is The Cinema. But how is sitting on your arse in a dark room with your friends (who you aren’t allowed to talk to) and staring at a screen for DEC 2013 - issue (35)
2 hours the best way to spend your leisure time? The answer is; because it’s different every time. Yes the premise is the same – sit down, shut up and stare at that screen there for the next two hours of your life – but the experience is always different. But best of all – your friends are right there having that experience with you, not sucked into a virtual existence on their phones (and if they are that person in the cinema who lights up the whole theatre with their distracting backlight then take their phone from them and sit on it). But here are more reasons why the cinema really is king: 1) The onscreen experience is always going to be something new. You’ll be treated to something you’ve never seen before, which is a hard aspect of leisure time to come by. You might by something new every time you go shopping, but the effort for reward ratio is way off.
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2) Going to the Cinema is the best way to experience this particular pastime (watching films). Sure HD and even 3D TV’s are on the market, and there’s always DVD’s and Netflix, but the cinema shows the film in all its glory – on a huge screen and an impressive sound system. 3) The Atmosphere. It’s an odd fact, but comedies are funnier with other people, action films are more enjoyable with other people and horrors are more intense with others. This point ties in closely with point #2 – the huge screen and booming sound system has a big part to play in this. 4) The Experience carries on after the film has ended and actually gets you and your friends talking – sometimes for hours. You are unlikely to talk about the taste, texture and price of your meal for any longer than 5 minutes after you’ve
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eaten and paid for it, but you can talk about a film for hours, sometimes days afterwards – and others join in. 5) The experience can affect your life. Granted, perhaps not in any major way, but it could bring much more unanticipated enjoyment than just its runtime suggests. For example, I saw Les Miserables with my student flatmates when it came out. Every day for the following two months, the whole flat was a muddled medley of every song in the film. It was annoying and hilarious at the same time. Yes, the cinema can be expensive, but there are ways to reduce the cost – it just takes a bit of planning. Check the cinema times, more often than not daytime showings are cheaper, you can also utilise special offers such as Orange Wednesdays. Also, bring you own food – there is no law stopping you from it and the myth that staff take your food from you isn’t true – they just don’t like it when you do it. This is because the cinema profits come solely from concessions, not ticket prices. Cinema is still the undisputed king of pastimes and it is only getting better, picture and sound quality is getting better, seats are getting comfier and 3D is really taking off, and soon we might even have 4D! Cinema truly offers a unique experience with each visit, so next time you’re stuck for what to do with your free time, look no further than the list of ‘next showings’.
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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HAYNES - ZOMBIE SURVIVAL MANUAL
Planning for a Zombie Apocalypse? Well then we’ve got some perfect bedtime reading for you. The Zombie Survival Manual is jam-packed full of techniques you’ll need to put to the test during an attack of the dead, along with mental preparations needed to help you keep your cool. Written by Sean T Page, a self-confessed Zombie expert and survivalist, you can learn all you need to know about protecting your loved ones, keeping food sources high, and the physical training required to be able to fight off the walking dead. Let’s face it, natural selection will get us all eventually; using this manual; filled with diagrams, drawings, maps and step-by-step instructions, you’ll be a fully qualified Zombie-fighter, increasing both your chances of apocalyptic survival and rebuilding your life in the post-apocalyptic world.
£14.95
www.prezzybox.com
BRIDGET JONES: MAD ABOUT THE BOY When Helen Fielding first wrote Bridget Jones’ Diary, charting the life of a 30-something singleton in London in the 1990s, she introduced readers to one of the most beloved characters in modern literature. With her hotly anticipated third instalment, Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy, Fielding introduces us to a whole new enticing phase of Bridget’s life set in contemporary London, including the challenges of maintaining sex appeal as the years roll by and the nightmare of drunken texting, the skinny jean, the disastrous email cc, total lack of twitter followers, and TVs that need 90 buttons and three remotes to simply turn on. An uproariously funny novel of modern life, Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy is a triumphant return of our favourite Everywoman.
£9.00
direct.asda.com
MOGA PRO CONTROLLER - ANDROID Unleash the true gaming power of your Bluetooth enabled, Android 2.3+ smartphone or tablet and transform the computer in your pocket into a second gaming console with the full-featured, console style MOGA Pro game controller. Key Features Rechargeable MOGA Pro Controller, USB Charge Cable, Tablet Stand and the MOGA Pivot App. Dual analog sticks, directional pad, shoulder buttons, triggers, full-sized grips and illuminated action buttons, plus a built-in rechargeable battery. The MOGA Arm secures your Bluetooth-enabled Android 2.3+ device (up to 82mm) to the MOGA Pro Controller. *** iOS versions available - MOGA ACE POWER ***
£39.99 Page 32
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www.game.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
R E H & M I H FOR METROKANE WINE CHILLING CARAFE
An ingenious design from Metrokane New York NY is this Rabbit Wine Chilling Carafe 75cl. It combines the convenience and style of a decanter with the functionality of a bottle chiller to serve your wine. Keeps your wine cool and ready to serve This unique carafe combines the convenience and style of a decanter with the functionality of a bottle chiller for cooling and serving your wine. A stainless steel ice chamber fits into the centre of the carafe which you can fill with ice to keep prechilled wine cool or to cool unchilled wine. Wine can be poured straight from the carafe with no need to remove the steel chiller.
£39.95
www.baytreecookware.co.uk
GERBER STEADY TOOL Gerber Steady Tool - Built for the weekend adventurer, the Gerber Steady combines the utility of a multi-tool and the functionality of a tripod for compact digital cameras (up to 340 grams) and smart phones (up to 170 grams). It comes equipped with an adjustable cell phone and screw-in camera mount and two foldable legs that serve as a tripod. The rest of the tool is all Gerber ingenuity ¡V a fine edge blade, a serrated blade, three screwdrivers, a bottle opener, pliers and wire cutters. Steady on down the trail. Features 12 Components Camera/Cell Phone Mount - Max Phone/Camera Weight: 170 grams/340 grams Fine Edge Blade Micro Flat, Square Cross & Medium Flat Screwdrivers Wire Cutters Tripod Functionality Cell Phone Attachment Serrated Blade Bottle Opener Needlenose Pliers Stainless Steel Components
£49.90
www.amazon.co.uk
ELIZABETH ARDEN EIGHT HOUR CREAM BEAUTY GIFT SET
A must-have collection for fans of Elizabeth Arden’s world-renowned Eight Hour cream. This luxury gift set includes the famous moisturiser as well as a bundle of treats for the face and body. Your skin will be left feeling silky-smooth and intensely moisturised. Presented in a delightful cosmetics purse, this gift set contains: Skin Protectant original, 50ml / Daily Moisturiser for face, 15ml / Body Treatment, 30ml / Hand Treatment, 30ml / Lip Protectant stick, 3.7g
£34.00
www.johnlewis.com
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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BOSCH T20 TASSIMO COFFEE MACHINE
The Bosch TAS2002GB Tassimo coffee maker ensures that a delicious hot beverage is only a touch of a button away! Finished in an elegant black, this Bosch machine uses Tassimo T-Discs to identify the drink selected through unique bar code technology. It then adjusts water, brewing time and temperature in their perfect measurements to provide you with a satisfying drink. And there’s no waiting around either! There is virtually no heat-up time thanks to innovative flow heater technology. The large selection of drinks can be manually adjusted. Your choice includes: Freshly brewed coffee / Creamy espresso / Cappuccino / Latte macchiato / Hot chocolate Or perhaps you just fancy a good old-fashioned cup of tea!
£39.99
www.currys.co.uk
DENISE TOTTEN ORIGINAL ART Destino Creative Boutique is a collection of original art & handmade bespoke jewellery. Commissions welcome. Expressive, Organic and Emotional. “Inspired by natures beauty, life’s revolving journey, and Dali, of course :) I like to work in pen & ink, gouache, acrylic paint & mixed media creating detailed fine ink illustrations & textured paintings. Look into it and see what you see..........................“ Bespoke jewellery collections all handmade by the artist - tribal, eclectic & unique using natural materials such as howlite stone, semi-precious stones, shells & many other colourful beads.
£various
direct.asda.com
MONOPOLY MARVEL COLLECTORS EDITION Marvel Comic Books Monopoly is a board based around different collectible comics & covers from Marvel’s rich history. From Tales to Astonish, to Wolverine and on to Amazing Fantasy 15, collect vibrant and much loved comics and build your empire of Bags and Cases. Play with 6 exclusive tokens and use the special Smaash and Thoomp cards to aid your game.
£29.99 Page 34
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www.play.com
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
R E H & M I H FOR KLEVERCASE
Disguise your tablet or e-reader with a range of classic hand made book case covers. The perfect traditional yet modern gift for book and gadget lovers alike, anyone would love to receive a classic gift with true craftmanship and book binding heritage thrown in. All of our cases are crafted by hand to order in our workshop in the New Forest England, using traditional techniques and over 35 years of book binding experience. For Kindle, iPad, Nexus, Samsung and more.
£25-36
www.klevercase.co.uk
OUTSIDE THE LINES For anyone who loves creativity and contemporary art, or who simply loves the joy of coloring, comes Outside the Lines, a striking collection of illustrations from more than 100 creative masterminds, including animators, cartoonists, fine artists, graphic artists, illustrators, musicians, outsider artists, photographers, street artists, and video game artists. With contributions from Keith Haring, AIKO, Shepard Fairey, Exene Cervenka, Keita Takahashi, Jen Corace, Ryan McGinness, and more, Outside the Lines features edgy and imaginative pieces ready for you to add your own special touch.
£11.02
www.amazon.co.uk
OLAY REGENERIST 7 PIECE GIFT SET The revolutionary aminopeptide complex in Olay’s Regenerist is one of the most effective ways to help reverse the signs of ageing. 2x Olay Regenerist Regenerating Serum (15ml) 1x Olay Regenerist Continuous Night Recovery Moisturiser (15ml) 1x Max Factor Colour Adapt Foundation Natural 70 (15ml) 1x Max Factor Nailfinity see Through Ivory (10ml) Black Mirror, Nail File & Gift Bag
£9.99
www.amazon.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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GIFT BOX GALORE
This gift box comes filled with a classic movie, playing cards and great sweet and chocolate treats. Perfect for a man who likes a good movie and playing card games and also enjoys a mug of tea with some delicious snacks! This would be a great unique idea for any occasion. Gift Box Contents: 1 x Classic action DVD – 3 to choose from - select from drop down menu / 1 x Bond girls playing cards 1 x Nobbys nuts - smoked sweet chilli pouch / 1 x Collage mug - Thundercats / 1 x 4” Gourmet chocolate Pizza / 1 x 200g box of either Drambuie Truffles or Original Toffee
£35.99
www.giftboxgalore.co.uk
ADJUSTABLE ALPHABET CAKE PAN An alphabet and number cake pan is a versatile pan that allows you to make any number or any letter by changing around some interior blocks. This is a handy cake pan to have for such occasions as any age birthdays, anniversaries, names and more. The pan is set up with moveable square blocks that allow you to change the shape of the interior of you cake pan and make any letter or number (as well as some abstract geometric designs) you could want.
£19.25
www.amazon.co.uk
TED TALKING TEDDY BEAR Ted is a 2012 American comedy film, directed, co-written and produced by Seth MacFarlane, who stars in it along with Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis. You’ll love this 16 inch tall Ted plush His mouth moves and he says phrases from the movie when you squeeze his tummy! Carry around with you everywhere you go the hilarious whimsical wonder of Seth MacFarlane’s Ted film! This excellent Ted Talking Backpack Clip Plush will keep you entertained for a countless amount of time. He looks so cute and innocent, but really he’s nothing of the sort and actually quite the raunchy little guy. You’d never expect it from a teddy bear, but that just goes to show you can’t judge a book by its cover!
£34.38 Page 36
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www.amazon.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
IAL PEOPLE IN
THOSE SPEC TOP GIFTS FOR
R E H & M I H FOR KRIMSON ARTWORKS
Krimson Artworks is a small, art company that accept commissions of all mediums and produce products inc. t-shirts, totes and occasion cards. Commissions typically include: portraits / drawings / illustrations of cars / homes etc / paintings of pretty much anything / small sculptures / murals and tattoo designs.
£various
Krimson Artworks
SLUSHIE MAKER When it comes to refreshing drinks on a hot day, nothing beats an ice-sold slushie. This tonguetingling blend of crushed ice and sweet juice has been a family favourite for decades. So you can imagine the giddy squeals, pushing, shoving, name-calling and rampant queue-jumping at the Firebox Diner when we took delivery of the Vintage Slushie Maker, in all its retro glory. Styled like it’s straight out of the Cunningham’s kitchen, this classic-looking machine will let you churn out fruity slushies, iced coffees, or chilled cocktails to your heart’s content. Happy days!
£59.99
www.firebox.com
DOVE ‘BE YOU’ GIFT SET Dove Be You Gift Set is the perfect gift for someone in need of a little indulgence. The rich shea butter and warm vanilla were specially selected to melt into the skin and ignite the senses with their luxurious scents. This set is sure to leave skin soft and radiant in no timethe perfect gift for those in need of a treat! Set contains: 1x Dove Purely Pampering Nourishing Body Wash with Shea Butter & Warm Vanilla 250ml 1x Dove Purely Pampering Nourishing Lotion with Shea Butter and Warm Vanilla 250ml 1x Dove Purely Pampering Hand Cream with Shea Butter and Warm Vanilla 75ml
£12.00
www.chemistdirect.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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TILE
Just attach, stick or drop your Tile into any item you might lose: laptops, wallets, keys, guitars, bikes— you name it. Then get on with the fun. The Tile App on your iOS device makes it easy to find your Tile(s) anywhere, anytime. Use Tile on as many things as you want. Add up to 10 Tiles on an account. Share access to Tiles with friends, family etc. Tiles will sound an alert if triggered. If you can hear it, you can find it. The Tile app remembers where it last saw your Tile, so you can easily find it right where you left it.
£15
www.thetileapp.com
JO MALONE CHRISTMAS CRACKER The Jo Malone™ Studio orchestrates a world of bespoke luxury that is inspired by, and immersed in, modern British culture, curating collaborations between world-renowned master perfumers and London’s leading creative talent, from Savile Row to Sloane Street. In working with the most forwardthinking style mavens Jo Malone London is enduringly at the forefront of perfumery. Christmas Cracker is a scented surprises. Tart-juicy Blackberry & Bay Cologne. Reviving Lime Basil & Mandarin Body & Hand Wash. Enlivening Grapefruit Body Crème. Your Jo Malone™ Gift will be exquisitely presented in an iconic box, tied with grosgrain ribbon. And enjoy complimentary standard delivery and a fragrance sample with all online orders.
£30.00
www.jomalone.co.uk
BULLDOG GROOMING KIT The Bulldog Grooming Kit For Men boasts a trip of innovative products which work together to keep the complexion feeling and looking fresh. Designed specifically for men, the shave cream ensures a close shave, whilst the face wash and moisturiser keep skin silky soft. K.D. This set contains the following products: Bulldog Original Moisturiser 100ml / Bulldog Original Face Wash 175ml / Bulldog Original Shave Gel 175m
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www.mankind.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
IAL PEOPLE IN
THOSE SPEC TOP GIFTS FOR
R E H & M I H FOR CERAMIC INITIALS WITH HEART
Lovely little free standing ceramic letters joined with an & and finished with a heart. These darling little letters are a perfect for celebrating your own relationship. Handmade using slip casting methods and glazed in classic off white. Each letter is unique and designed to sit discreetly in the home making a perfect gift, at 4cm tall there is always a sweet spot in someone’s home for these letters. Supplied gift wrapped free of charge in a lovely white box with tissue paper and matching ribbon. Letters are available in off white and the heart is available in white or pink.
£27.95
THE GIFT STUDIO
MAKEY MAKEY An incredible introduction to circuits and controls, the MaKey MaKey is about as hands-on as inventing gets. Designed by two very clever chaps in the US, and originally launched through Kickstarter, we’re super excited to bring you this UK exclusive. Basically, MaKey MaKey allows you to create computer controllers from everyday items. All you need is the kit, some crocodile clips and an assortment of objects. Any material that will conduct even a slight electrical current will work as a control surface; from Play-Doh to pencils, from grapes to Grandma. Simply load up a program games, instruments, word processors, you name it - and plug in the MaKey MaKey board; then it’s just a case of deciding what does what. You can control Pac-Man from a pencil drawing, or turn a staircase into a piano. The best thing about MaKey MaKey is its simplicity. Rather than requiring hours of setup and study, you can open the box and be experimenting immediately.
£39.99
www.amazon.co.uk
GIFT BOX GALORE This mouth watering “chocolate heaven” gift box comes filled with quality and luxury chocolate delights. Items include chocolate bars, fudge, truffles and more. This gift box hamper is sure to suit anyone who likes to treat themselves with chocolate indulgences. Makes a great unique gift to show someone you care on many occasions. Gift Box Contents: 1 x Red hearts chocolate cube / 1 x Divine white chocolate bar 100g 1 x Divine milk chocolate bar 100g / 1 x Divine dark chocolate bar 100g 1 x Medium chocolate champagne bottle / 1 x Chocolate fudge bar 1 x Chocolate and caramel English truffles
£24.99
www.giftboxgalore.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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COOKING UP A STORM
Cooking Up A Storm - The Teen Survival Cookbook - What’s cooking? Find out in this cool cookbook - written by a teenager, for teenagers! A kid’s gotta eat - and what better way to make sure that the food on your plate hits the spot than to make it yourself? Fifteen-year-old Sam Stern, with a bit of help from his mum, Susan, is more than happy to share dozens of his favourite recipes for all occasions. There are pancakes for breakfast and easy lunches like soup or salad to pack up for school. Quick meals like spaghetti or omelettes are best for busy school nights; for weekends there are serious dinners like homemade lasagne or whole roasted chicken. And don’t forget fancy, mouthwatering desserts; addictive but healthy snacks. Especially geared toward teen readers, “Cooking Up A Storm” is bursting with over 120 healthy, tasty and simple recipes and food ideas and features a lively commentary from Sam.
£8.64
www.amazon.co.uk
STRIPE ONESIE Crafted from pure cotton for comfort, the Striped Onesie from John Lewis is full length, lightweight and features contrast ribbed cuffs to the arms and ankles. Complete with a contrast trim to the collar, the onesie is finished with buttons through the front centre for ease of wear.
£25.00
www.johnlewis.com
QUICKPLAY KICKSTER ACADEMY ULTRAPORTABLE 8’ x 5’ FOOTBALL GOAL Wherever you are and whatever your age, within 90 seconds you could be set up for a game of football. Quick Play’s Kickster Academy goal is designed to allow you to get the ball rolling as quickly and easily as possible with a tent-style construction system that uses elastic cord to minimise on lost parts. With a robust and flexible design, if you see your shot crash against the posts or crossbar, the frame is designed to deform then instantly return to its original shape. Packed away in its easy open carry bag and thanks to a shoulder strap, it can be transported with simplicity. Perfect for taking on holiday, down the park or even setting it up in your garden, Quick Play’s goal is a must-have piece of equipment for your next kick-about.
£54.38 Page 40
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www.amazon.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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TEEN R E H & M I H FOR
ORIGINS GO GINGER BODY COLLECTION An indulgent trio of products, the Go Ginger Collection Set features the Origins’ number one best selling scent in a delicious array of whipped body creams, cleansers and scrubs. This Origins set contains: • Ginger Souffle Whipped body cream, 50ml • Incredible Spreadable Smoothing ginger body scrub, 50ml • Ginger Burst Savory Body Wash, 50ml
£18.70
www.johnlewis.com
SYMA 2ND EDITION INDOOR HELICOPTER This Brand New 3 Channel mini rc helicopter is the world’s newest, most durable and stable helicopter. The item comes with the latest gyro system for precision control. The metal frame has proven to withstand dozens of crashes. The mini helicopter charges directly from the controller which uses “AA” batteries and has a full-function trim control for the perfect flight. Get one today before they all fly away! Product Description Miniature Size & Light Weight / Upgrade gyro system for precise control / 2 Selectable Frequencies Lets You Fly Up To 2 Helicopters At Once / Fly Up to 2 Helicopters At Once / Complete Kit, Ready to Fly
£16.99
www.amazon.co.uk
FRIENDSHIP BRACELET KIT Everything they need to be the coolest kid in the playground. Make super special friendship bracelets for all your friends! This kit includes 96 metres of thread in 12 vibrant colours and safety pins to keep your bracelets in place whilst being made. A colourful booklet with instructions for five different bracelet designs is included, all packed in a handy tin.
£11.95
ALL THINGS BRIGHTON BEAUTIFUL
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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RASPBERRY PI MODEL B
The Raspberry Pi is a credit-card-sized single-board computer developed in the UK by the Raspberry Pi Foundation with the intention of promoting the teaching of basic computer science in schools. The Raspberry Pi is a small, powerful and lightweight ARM based computer which can do many of the things a desktop PC can do. The powerful graphics capabilities and HDMi video output make it ideal for multimedia applications such as media centres and narrowcasting solutions. The Raspberry Pi is based on a Broadcom BCM2835 chip. It does not feature a built-in hard disk or solid-state drive, instead relying on an SD card for booting and long-term storage. So whether you want to learn to programme, hack around with some hardware or design it in at the core of your innovative new device. The only challenge is deciding what you will do with yours?
£29.95
www.play.com
INITIAL CASE FOR IPHONE Personalise your iPhone with your initial or favourite letter of the alphabet with this gloss plastic hard case! The beautiful bold initial design has been printed in black and white. The case has transparent sides and a clear gloss finish which protects the print underneath. The case clips to your phone neatly and its slim design compliments the shape of the phone perfectly. Packaged in a lovely sturdy cardboard box, for easy wrapping! iPhone cases are available in every lovely letter from A to Z! Suitable for iPhone 4/4s or iPhone 5/5S.
£20
ALPHABET BAGS
MARVEL RETRO MESSENGER This Marvel Messenger Bag is covered in your favourite comic hero`s including Spiderman, yes he`s back! This comic strip design messenger bag will make a great addition; you can even match it with our marvel stationary collection right here on Ryman online then you can be the envy of all your friends when you get this out in class! Features • Outside pocket with Velcro closer • Inside pocket with zip closer • Adjustable shoulder strap • Approximate dimensions H:300 w:430mm
£24.99 Page 42
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www.amazon.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
TEEN R E H & M I H FOR BIG BANG THEORY THE PARTY GAME
This genius matching game is based on the hilarious comedy show the Big Bang Theory Party Game. It allows you and your friends to revisit unforgettable moments from the TV series. To play, you need to deal out the cards, with one player acting as the referee. The referee will choose from a selection of category cards that will have a description on, like “Bad at Sports.” The other players will then have to best match his card with hilarious answers to the statement, for example a “Personal Robot”. The referee will then award points to who he thinks has best matched his statement card. The roles are swapped and the game continues until the player with the most points wins. There are nearly 300 cards featuring quotes, gags and pictures from the show. An excellent after dinner game for TV lovers.
£22.15
www.gadgetgrotto.com
TETRIS LIGHT Since its release from Soviet Russia in the early 80’s, Tetris has become firmly entrenched as one of the greatest computer games of all time. The symmetry, the strategy, the flashing, coloured bricks; frankly, it has everything a discerning gamer could possibly wish for. Flash your retro credentials, and brighten up that minimalist apartment with this official Tetris Light that lets you redesign your desk lamp whenever you like. Simply connect one of the bricks to the mains and then as each new brick is placed into position they will light up through some kind of magical, pre-war 8-bit Russian science.* Plus, during the day you can play a very short game of Tetris, although we’re almost certain that you won’t be able to form a perfect cube using every part.
£24.99
www.firebox.com
NAIL ART SET Nail art set. Set contains black nail polish, holographic glitter nail polish, black and silver gems, pearls, nail art brush, nail file and cuticle stick. Use the nail polish and nail art brush to create designs. Apply the gems and pearls to wet polish to embellish the look.
£18.00
www.topshop.com
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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BUILD YOUR OWN LIFE SIZED HUMAN SKELETON
Looks pretty real doesn’t it? Don’t worry, we’re not a bunch of eccentric grave-robbing loons – this happy chap was gracefully crafted from the Build Your Own Life Size Human Skeleton book. With a bit of patience, a few split-pins and some very thorough folding, this brilliantly bony book mutates from a fine flat-packed fellow into your very own skeletal sidekick. Each page is conveniently perforated so that you can easily pop the bones out – no scissors or glue required (Hallelujah!).
£19.99
www.firebox.com
BAGPUSS HEATABLE BOOTS “Bagpuss, dear Bagpuss, Old Fat Furry Catpuss” is what Emily used to say before she woke up Old Bagpuss for his latest adventure. Bring Bagpuss to life (well, almost) in your own home with these adorable Bagpuss Slipper Boots. Made from only the best quality fabrics, these cute-as-a-bagpuss slipper boots come in one size which fits UK Adult 3-7. Best of all, when its raining dogs and catpusses outside and you feel like your toes are about to drop off; pop old catpuss into the microwave and warm him up! Warm Catpuss Slipper Boots in seconds, and tootsies that don’t fall off! Your tooties will be toasty warm, and, thanks to the lavender-infused Bagpuss material, will smell like a garden of luscious lavender. Cuteness, comfort and clean-smells...what more could you ask for on a cold day?!
£19.95
www.prezzybox.com
LED MULTI COLOUR JELLYFISH TANK The item is a beautiful swimming jellyfish light up aquarium tank, which is powered by 3 AA batteries or USB cable, and has 3 realistic swimming jellyfishes and simulated ocean background with colorchanging LED lights. Only to add water into the tank, you can watch as the life-like jellyfish gently swim. At night, the effect is more clearer. Besides, it also can act as a LED mood lamp, for the colorchanging lights can add ambience to your room. Therefore, it is really a wonderful jellyfish light up tank suitable for home and office use.
£28.99 Page 44
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www.amazon.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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TEEN R E H & M I H FOR HAYNES - STUDENT MANUAL
Even though uni has a million things to love, there are a million traps you can easily fall into. For one, money management is hard (as you often find out when you realise you’ve spent £1000 in 2 months on nothing but clothes and clubbing) and your cooking can often make you feel very home-sick. You need a Student Manual to help get you through uni life with as little trouble as possible. Enter this fantastic Manual that has hints and tips from experts and current uni students, you’ll have everything from money and budgets to sexual health and relationships covered. So, whether you’re a mum or dad worried about your little petal heading off into the big wide world, or you’re a student worried about how you’re going to pay your landlord; you need this stupendous Student Manual to help you get through what will be the best 3 years of your life.
£14.95
www.prezzybox.com
HEXBUG NANO V2 INFINITY LOOP What’s the point in having a vertically climbing Hexbug Nano V2 if you don’t have a set to show how super awesome it is!? Each part can be connected to one another, cell to cell, tube to cell and tube to tube. All the tubes are tight, strong and transparent so the audience can still see the bugs buzzing around and speeding past each other. The sets are completely customisable which means you can design the layout and attach more and more pieces from different sets to create the metropolis bug centre you have always dreamed of. The Nano V2 Infinity Loop will send your V2’s around the bend, literally! The Hex cell features four fixed pegs and two rotating flags to send your bug in each and every direction. Not only that, there are also two transparent tubes for your bugs to explore.
£19.95
??????????
DOODLE PILLOWCASE AND PEN SET Following on from the great success of the Doodle Duvet, here is something else to help your little ones creative side. The Doodle Pillowcase is made from quality 100% superfine cotton giving your budding Picasso a great canvas for their amazing and imaginative designs. The Doodle Pillowcase comes with a set of 8 wash-out doodle colour pens giving a wide variety of colours to work with. Once all the space has been used up or they get bored with their design, simple wash the pillowcase at 40°c and you are ready for a fresh start. The Doodle Pillowcase has a pretty, curved frame printed on one side and memo style sheet on the other and for those secret messages, there is an extra notepad tucked into its inner fold so prying eyes will not be able to see your top secret messages.
£14.99
www.thepresentfinder.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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MARVEL COMIC OUTSIDE PRINT WALLET
This Marvel wallet features a clever montage of vintage comic strip graphics on the outside including the likes of The Incredible Hulk, Spiderman and the X-men to name only a few! Keep your cards and money in one place and express your heroic side!
£11.95
www.play.com
ONE DIRECTION GIRL’S QUARTZ WATCH This One Direction watch makes an ideal gift for any 1D fan! The cool watch features the famous 1D logo, is buckle fastening and comes with a battery so you can start using it straight away!
£14.86
www.amazon.co.uk
STAR WARS ONESIES Calling all Star Wars fans! We’re guessing you like Star Wars, let’s face it who doesn’t, but if you also like comfort and looking incredibly cool, then you have come to the right place. These officially licensed Onesies ‘are the ones you are looking for’ <waves hand in front of face> and styled on the most popular characters - Boba Fett, R2-D2, Stormtrooper and the almighty Darth Vader! Each Onesie is made from 65% polyester and 35% cotton fleece for snuggly goodness. Onesies aren’t just designed for relaxation and pyjamas though, you can be a Star Wars hero wherever you like, Darth at the supermarket, Boba Fett at the bistro etc. The Onesies all come with high quality plastic printing along the fronts, back, arms and hoods. All the Onesies have cuffed arms, a lined hood, front pockets, and a generous zip length with a large fabric zip pull for added detail.
£39.95 Page 46
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www.red5.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
TEEN R E H & M I H FOR ONE DIRECTION: THIS IS US
Morgan Spurlock, the man behind ‘Super Size Me’ (2004), is the surprise director of this documentary on the highly successful British pop group. The band, comprised of Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson, shot to fame off the back of their appearance in the seventh series of ‘The X Factor’. Following the show they signed to Simon Cowell’s label Syco Records for the release of their debut album ‘Up All Night’ (2011), which soared to the top of the charts in both Britain and the USA. The documentary captures both the onstage and offstage lives of the boys, featuring a blend of behind the scenes and performance footage, as well as charting the origins of each member and the journey that led them to become part of the group.
£10.00
www.amazon.co.uk
SPACERAIL This Level 3 SpaceRail is an amazing advanced 16,000mm perpetual rollercoaster rail, with double loop, twists and turns, stunt sections and towering motorised elevator. This self-perpetuating SpaceRail is hugely entertaining and out of this world! A potentially never-ending spectacle, watch in wonder as the steel balls navigate an exhilarating ride of twists, turns and stunt sections. With two separate tracks you can enjoy watching as each of the steel balls leave the lift rolls around the track to a direction alternator to send them off on two separate routes, one of which includes an exciting double loop the loop and the other track includes several impressive dips and sharp corners.
£24.99
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ONE DIRECTION SINGLE DUVET SET Calling all Directioners! Cuddle up with your favourite boyband and make your friend’s jealous of all the individual autographed pictures you’ll have on this amazing duvet set. The set is sure to go with any bedroom decor and the scattered stars & hearts are sure to add style to your cool room. One Direction Single Duvet Set Double-sided with music lyrics on opposite side Includes autographed pictures of each member Colours and design may vary 100% Polyester Microfibre
£26.00
www.totally-funky.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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TEKSTA THE ROBOTIC PUPPY
Add a new pet to the family - the new Teksta Dalmatian! Teksta is a life-like robotic puppy that responds to your voice, physical gestures, lights and sounds. Engineered with state-of-the-art artificial intelligence, Tekstas’ toyetic interaction offers many emotions - barking, crying, whimpering, and expressive eye patterns to share his feelings. As your devoted companion, Teksta will fall asleep when the sun goes down and will wake up happy to greet you in the morning. Using cutting edge hand gesture technology, you can not only command Teksta to stop and sit but also teach him to perform his most spectacular trick of all, a back flip! With over 100 physical and interactive play features, Teksta will excite and inspire children of all ages.
£59.99
www.toysrus.co.uk
MONSTER HIGH 13 WISHES DOLLS Based on the Movie Monster High 13 Wishes! It’s a classic genie story Ñ with a Monster High twist! When Howleen Wolf discovers a magic lantern, she’s granted 13 wishes instead of three. She makes some good choices and some bad choices, and creature chaos soon ensues! It’s up to the ghoul friends to save the day Ñ and all before the Haunt the Casbah Dance!
£13.59
www.amazon.co.uk
FURBY BOOM A whole new generation of Furby is hatching! Combining physical and digital play, the new Furby Boom will take you on a digital adventure! Furby Boom has a mind of its own with a personality that is shaped by the way you play. Furby Boom speaks its own Furbish language and the more you interact with it the more English it speaks too!
£59.99 Page 48
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www.selfridges.com
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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S D I K E H T FOR FLUTTERBYE FLYING FAIRY DOLL
A world of enchantment is in your hands with the Flutterbye Pink Flying Fairy! Simply press the button on the display stand to set the fairy’s wings in motion, and watch her dance through the air as you guide her flight using only your hand! Place your hand beneath her and raise or lower it to make her fly higher or lower, and move it sideways to make her fly left or right!
£34.99
www.toysrus.co.uk
THE HOBBIT ACTION FIGURES The Hobbit Action Figures features authentic detail of a key character from The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. Each figure contains up to 12 points of articulation and replicates the facial features, clothing, weapons and accessories of the character in painstaking detail. There are five characters to collect: Bilbo, Thorin Oakenshield, Gandalf Legolas and Grinnah the Goblin. The Hobbit Legolas Action Figure is suitable for ages 4 years and up. There is also a collection of other various action figures from the movie and sets available.
£2-15
??????????
ONE DIRECTION DOLL You might have trouble choosing out of these cute personality styled One Direction band members Harry, Niall, Louis, Liam and Zayn each come with their own personally styled fashion outfits. Perfect for all fans of 1D! Collect all 5 members of the band. 1 doll supplied.
£19.99
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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MELISSA & DOUG STANDARD BLOCKS
Build a tower, a town or just about anything with these large solid-wood standard unit blocks. The 60 big, smooth-sanded sturdy blocks are naturally finished with a classic look for hours of classic fun. The handsome wooden storage crate makes clean up and storage easy. Measures 15”L x 12.25”W x 5.25”D. Sixty natural finished, smooth-sanded hardwood blocks Packaged in a handsome, wooden storage crate for easy storage Ideal for building and introducing the relation of part to whole Exceptional quality and value
£44.93
www.amazon.co.uk
SOFIA THE FIRST TALKING SOFIA Play Out Sofia’s Enchanted Adventures Thanks to her magical amulet from the King, Sofia has the power to understand and communicate with her beloved animal friends. This large-scale “talking” doll celebrates Sofia’s unique gift with a glowing amulet and three sculpted animal figures. “Chat” With the Animals. Precious Sofia doll can interact with the included figures - Clover the Rabbit, Mia the Bluebird, and Robin the Robin. To activate, simply place a figure close to Sofia’s amulet. Just like in the series, Sofia’s amulet glows, and she “talks” with each of her animal friends. Girls can unlock over 30 phrases, really bringing the characters to life. Fashions Fit for a Princess Sofia looks enchanting in her signature purple gown with a sparkly bodice and sheer peplum. She wears her purple amulet, which perfectly matches the glittery tiara atop her loose wavy curls.
£32.94
www.amazon.co.uk
LEGO CITY COAST GUARD PATROL Head out to the lighthouse quick with the LEGO City coast guard patrol! There’s a couple stranded in a sinking dinghy and three sharks are swimming nearby! Launch the submarine and helicopter from the coast guard patrol boat to get there fast. Rescue the couple with the life preservers, pull them into the helicopter and scare the sharks away with the water cannons! LEGO® model number: 60014 Includes 3 sharks, a pilot, a captain, a crew member, a rescuer, a man, a woman, a dog, a crab, 2 life preservers, 2 life jackets, a walkie-talkie, a hat with headphones and an ice cream.
£59.99 Page 50
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www.argos.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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S D I K E H T FOR VTECH INNOTAB 3S
Give your child their own durable multi-media touch-screen tablet with VTech’s InnoTab 3S Learning App Tablet. This multi-functional tablet for children ages 3 - 9 has been scaled down in size to make it even more portable! The InnoTab 3S comes with a pop-up, on-screen keypad and stylus. Kids can take notes, draw pictures, create an address book, or use built-in utilities like the calendar and calculator. 5 inch touch screen / 2MP rotatable photo/video camera / Child-friendly wi-fi / G-sensor / 2 GB of onboard memory / MicroSD card slot for expandable memory / Media players for MP3s, photos, and videos, and a d-pad / Kid Connect app, plus a bonus game and ebook / Art studio and colouring book apps / 1 free downloadable app from the Learning Lodge Navigator / Rechargeable battery pack
£69.99
www.toysrus.co.uk
MINECRAFT Create, explore and play in a Minecraft microbuild! Build a mini model of the game that’s sweeping the Internet with a LEGO® microbuild version of Minecraft! Selected by LEGO CUUSOO members, this build features a cool design with lots of 1x1 LEGO tiles and 2 buildable Micromob characters: Steve and Creeper. • Includes 2 buildable Micromob characters: Steve and Creeper • Build a Minecraft microworld with 1 stud tiles in a variety of colors for a realistic pixelated design! • Build the model that LEGO® CUUSOO members requested!
£34.99
shop.lego.com
ROBO FISH AQUARIUM PLAY SET Single Robo Fish aquatic robot toy with a fish tank play set. Drop Robo Fish into a bowl of water and it springs to life, swimming in a way that’s almost indistinguishable from a real fish. Remove it from water and dry to deactivate, ready for use next time. Each pack contains one Robo Fish with batteries, spare batteries and a clear plastic Robo Fish bowl. Features •Aquatic robot play set •As seen on TV •Robo Fish activates in water •Swims like a real fish •Comes with spare batteries •Includes plastic fish bowl •Eight Robo Fish designs available, one selected at random in this pack
£23.99
www.amazon.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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GIFT BOX GALORE
Finding the right gift can be a challenge. At Gift Box Galore we have a diverse range of gift hampers, including; pamper hampers, Scottish hampers and retro sweet hampers, all of which are suitable for many occasions and aimed to meet different budgets. Using luxury and quality products we have created a wonderful range of unique gift ideas. Find the perfect Christmas gift, birthday gift, baby gift, valentines gift, fun gift, anniversary gift, wedding gift, mother’s day gift, father’s day gift, chocolate & sweet treats and much more. Browse our full range of gift hampers for men, women, children and babies to discover the ideal gift to meet your requirements.
£10-70
www.giftboxgalore.co.uk
THE GOBSTOPPER The Gobstopper are proud to be independent (no, they aren’t a franchise, or owned by some big conglomerate) and to have created a business and employment in their local area. The Gobstopper really is a family affair with Mark “doing the boring stuff”, Sean his younger cousin managing the day to day business and Lisa very much the creative input. It’s also not unusual to see other family members either behind the counter or packing orders to send out to customers. “Here at The Gobstopper we LOVE sweets, we LOVE art, and we LOVE all things retro. So we’ve decided to be creative and combine the three into what we call our Retro Remixes! Over the coming months we’ll be uploading pictures of the artwork we create and we want you to get involved too!”
£loads
www.thegobstopper.co.uk
FUNKY HAMPERS Funky Hampers is a family run business based in Eastbourne, East Sussex and have been running online since 2007. “We strive to offer a large range of exclusive gifts as well as standard gifts such as flowers and chocolates. We aim to offer gifts which are a little bit different, quirky even, with the onus being on making people say wow. Too many companies offer the same sort of gifts, which people receive every day and in all honesty may just think, that’s was nice. We aim to go one step further and offer gifts which people will remember.”
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www.funkyhampers.com
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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H T O O T T E E FOR A SW HANDY CANDY
Handy Candy started out as a bit of fun way back in 2004. Having built some successful sites for other people selling anything from Car Audio equipment to vitamin pills we fancied having a go ourselves so packed our tiny office with all our favourite sweets, bought ourselves a set of scales and launched our own sweet shop. We’ve come a long way since then, sending literally tons of old fashioned sweets, retro sweet hampers and gift jars to happy customers all over the world. However we still have the same passion for what we do as we did way back when we started – whether it’s trying out new sweets, rediscovering old favourites or putting together great gift ideas.
£oodles
www.handycandy.co.uk
ALL OCCASION SWEET SHOP The All Occasion Sweet Shop is a family-run business which represents an on-line version of our earlier old fashioned sweet shop based in Lancashire. When we opened our original sweet shop it was the intention of providing people locally with somewhere great to visit which would evoke wonderful childhood memories. Throughout the 1960`s and 70`s the shop itself, known then as `Old Fred`s Toffee Shop’, had been a favourite calling place of one of the older partners now of the All Occasion Sweet Shop. When Old Fred sadly passed away in the 1980`s the shop progressed through various ownerships and various trades until, in the late 1990`s, we were lucky enough to buy the shop ourselves and to set about restoring it to its former glory as a good old fashioned sweet shop.
£heaps
www.alloccasionsweetshop.co.uk
THE STATESIDE CANDY CO We are a UK based company specialising in the sale of foods and beverages from both America and also offer a range of UK products as well. We have an ever growing range of American goodies including best selling items such as Lucky Charms Cereal, Oreo Cookies, Hershey’s Candy and A&W Root Beer Soda plus a huge amount more! We also sell a huge range of British foods and drinks too with items such as Haribo Sweets, Cadbury’s Chocolates, Walkers Crisps and drinks such as Cherry 7UP and Irn Bru.
£stacks
www.americansweets.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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BOXHAPPY
At boxhappy.com we are passionate about what we do. We set up this site because we’re dedicated to making people feel special and we know that you love that too. We have now been trading online for over a decade, having launched the Boxhappy gift website way back in 2002. We are constantly working at expanding and improving our gift range. Also don’t hesitate to let us have your feedback on what you see. We have a wide product range featuring anything from Get Well Gifts to Scottish Gifts, Birthday Gifts to Christmas Gifts; but there is always room for more!
£tonnes
www.boxhappy.com
AMERICAN FIZZ American Fizz (UK) Ltd. are one of the largest importers and distributors of American Food and Groceries, American Candy and Sweets, American Soda and Energy Drinks here in the UK. Their wide product range and lower prices are some of the best in the UK. They have the largest variety of American Soft Drinks in the UK and are the Official UK importer and distributor for National Beverage Corp, whose portfolio of products include Faygo Soda, Shasta Soda, Rip It Energy Drinks, Everfresh Fruit Juices and Sundance Ice Teas. Import and distribute American Root Beer brands in the UK such as: A & W, Mug, IBC, Faygo, Barqs and Stewarts in regular and diet. PLus American Soda Drink brands Dr Pepper-Snapple products, Coca Cola products and Pepsi Products.
£pounds
www.americanfizz.co.uk
THE CANDYWORKSHOP Once upon a time there was a little boy called Franco. Franco did what every other 4 year old did when he was given sweets and ice cream...he mixed them together. Whatever Franco was given, he mixed it together into a concoction that somehow seemed much more appetising to him. That was where the Candy Workshop idea was born. Thanks to Franco, various products were developed such as The Frankenjelly Kit, The Edible Zen Garden, The Zombies & Aliens kit etc. On top of this, we sourced fantastic DIY candy kits from around the world such as the Kracie Popin Cookin Kits, Candy Science kits and anything else that encompassed Franco’s ethos of candy mixing and downright fun!
£oodles Page 54
YOUR LIFE...
F S A E D I T F I G ME OF THE
WE LOOK AT SO
thecandyworkshop.com
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
IAL PEOPLE IN
THOSE SPEC TOP GIFTS FOR
H T O O T T E E FOR A SW SWEETREET
We love sweets! And not just sweets – chocolates too. In fact just about anything sweet and moreish. We wanted to share this passion with the whole wide world and that is how SweeTreet was born! We started off by looking at how we could replicate the traditional sweet shop (sorry shoppe) experience online and allow not just the purchase of pre-packaged sweets and chocolates but also the ability to pick and mix (or click ‘n’ mix as we like to call it) could be replicated on the internet and that is exactly what we did. We didn’t stop at the UK though. We did our homework – we looked at the best selling sweets in the US, Canada and Australia and brought them back to the SweeTreet HQ.
£loads
www.sweetreet.com
BHS LUXURY SWEET HAMPER This Stunning Luxury, Sweet Hamper is a product of Thornton & France a Luxury Food and Wine Merchant. This beautiful hamper includes Sol Club Bucks Fizz (2x20cl) / Beech’s Luxury Plain Chocolate Brazil Nuts (90g) / Duncans Champagne Chocolates (120g) / Belgian Champagne Truffles (200g) / Belgian Mint Truffines (60g) / Belgian Strawberry Truffines (60g) / Hamlet Belgian Chocolates (125g) / Northumbrian Chocolate Brazil Nut Cookies (200g) / Northumbrian Triple Chocolate Cookies (200g).
£35.00
www.bhs.co.uk
CADBURY XMAS SHARING BASKET Have a festive Christmas with Cadbury and a range of traditional Christmas chocolate including Christmas selection boxes as well as NEW Maynards Christmas Jellies in a 14” wicker basket. The perfect Christmas gift and a magical Cadbury Christmas surprise which will be treasured forever! Contains: 1 x Christmas Snowman Selection Box, 1 x Christmas Sleigh Selection Pack, 1 x Chocolate Santa 100g, 1 x Snow Bites Bag 100g, 1 x Milk Chocolate Tree Decorations Bag 55g, 1 x Wishes Share Bag 128g, 1 x Maynards Christmas Jellies 100g, 1 x Dairy Milk Freddo Faces Tube 72g, 1 x Dairy Milk Buttons Tube 72g, 1 x Maynards Christmas Jellies
£30.00
www.cadburygiftsdirect.co.uk
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAGE 55
FEEDME FEEDMENOW!!!
LIFE(STYLE) FEATURE
FESTIVE
STARTER
G CH SO
image by Breville USA @ flickr
Preparation and cooking times
balsamic vinegar, to drizzle
Prep time: 15 mins - Cook time: 25 mins
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty...
Ingredients
As usual kick off by preheating your oven, 180°C or 160°C for fan ovens. Butter 4 x 150ml (¼pt) ramekins using softened butter and set them to the side for later.
25g (1oz) unsalted butter 25g (1oz) plain flour 200ml (7fl oz) milk 100g (3½ oz) soft goat’s cheese, crumbled 1tsp Dijon mustard 3 sprigs lemon thyme, leaves only 2 large eggs, separated 50ml (2fl oz) double cream 25g (1oz) pecorino cheese, grated 50g (2oz) sunblush tomatoes, chopped large handful rocket, to serve olive oil, to drizzle
Page 56
Melt the butter in a simmering pan and slowly mix in the flour until you get a smooth paste going, cook the paste for 2 mins. Next whisk in the milk and bring to the boil. Cook for a further 4 minutes until well thickened. Take off the heat and add the goat’s cheese, mustard, lemon thyme leaves and the egg yolks. Beat really well and season as desired. Use an electric hand whisk and beat the egg whites until they
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
are stiff fold in and pla
Bake fo them to
Prehea out you cream, 10 min thyme, vinegar
PEPPERMINT TREAT A WEE TREAT
GOAT’S HEESE OUFFLES
ff. Add the whites into the cheese mixture and gently with a spoon. Fill your prepared ramekins to the rim ace in a baking tray filled with boiling water.
or 15-20 minutes, then remove from the oven and allow o cool then stick them in the fridge to chill.
at the oven this time to 220°C or 200°C for fans. Turn ur chilled soufflés into a dish. Pour on some of the , a sprinkle of pecorino and bake again for a further nutes. Scatter over the sunblush tomatoes with some , and serve with a nice green salad drizzled with oil and r.
Preparation and cooking times Prep time: 2 mins - Cook time: 10 mins
Ingredients 200g bar plain chocolate, broken into chunks 600ml milk 150ml pot single or double cream sugar, to taste
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty... Place the chocolate and milk in a pan and gently heat, stirring continually until all the chocolate has melted. Keep going until the milk begins to steam, remove from the heat and stir in the cream. Pour the hot chocolate into mugs and add sugar to taste, just before you serve pop in 1 or 2 peppermint candies for an extra special wee Christmas kick. Inspired by a recipe for ‘Peppermint hot chocolate’ @ www.bbcgoodfood.com
Inspired by a recipe @ realfood.tesco.com/recipes
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAGE 57
FEEDME FEEDMENOW!!!
LIFE(STYLE)
FESTIVE
FEATURE
MAIN
CHRISTMAS TURKEY CURRY The festive season in our household tends to air on the traditional side of things, so it’s always nice to have a wee change from time to time and go for something out of the ordinary, and a nice curry is about as out of the ordinary as we get during this time. Although we are still using the traditional Christmas bird as its base so if you have any leftovers your on to a winner…
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty... To start with we need to make a curry paste base for the dish so smash the chopped onion, chillies, coriander seeds, tamarind, sugar, ginger and one clove of garlic into a paste using your blender or food processor. Grab a sauté pan or large frying pan and heat the oil, add the turkey and cook until just turning a golden brown, do it in bits if you don’t have a pan big enough. Add the remaining garlic clove and thyme. Remove the cooked turkey pieces from the pan and throw away the garlic. Pour your blended paste into the same pan and cook for a few minutes before re-adding the turkey to the pan. Add the coconut milk, stock and potatoes.
Preparation and cooking times Prep time: 30 mins - Cook time: 30-60 mins
Ingredients 165g sweetcorn (I’m using Green Giant, small tin, naturally sweet) 1 tsp red curry paste ½ cup Self flour ½ tsp Sugar Pinch of salt 1 ½ tbsp coconut milk or water Oil, for frying Sweet chili dip for serving
Simmer gently for 20 minutes until you are sure that the turkey has cooked completely through and the sauce has thickened to a nice consistency. Last but not least and the spinach, fresh coriander and almonds, stir and warm through. Serve with boiled rice, small Nan bread portions and poppadum’s for an all-out festive Indian treat. Inspired by a recipe @ www.bbc.co.uk/food
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
DESERT
LEMON CUPCAKES I love a wee cupcakes, they were all the rage probably until Krispy Kreme’s came along but let’s face it not everyone can make doughnuts at home now can we, so for a Christmas treat a wee cupcake or two makes a welcome change from all the heavy mince pies and fruit cakes. We’ve even come up with a low-cal version just so you know that having 2 won’t break the calorie bank with around 170 calories per cupcake. I love a zesty lemon fresh cake around this time so we’ll make a nice fresh lemon batch but you can get loads of other awesome recipes online so fill your boots so to speak.
Preparation and cooking times Prep time: 15 mins - Cook time: 30-40 mins
Ingredients
200g/7oz self-raising flour 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda 75g/3oz golden caster sugar 100g/3½oz blueberries 1 unwaxed lemon, zest finely grated 2 free-range eggs
150ml/¼ pint low-fat natural yoghurt 2 tbsp semi-skimmed milk 50ml/2fl oz sunflower oil For the lemon icing 100g/3½oz icing sugar 4 tsp fresh lemon juice
Now lets get down to the nitty gritty... First off get your oven on at 180C/350F to preheat. While that’s going on line your 12-hole, deep muffin baking tray with some colourful non-stick paper cases. Sift both the bicarbonate of soda and flour into a large mixing bowl, add the sugar and mix in well, throw in your blueberries and the grated lemon zest. Now make a wee well in the middle of the mixture, yep a wee well, and that’s easy for me to say, being Scottish. In another bowl beat your eggs using a large whisk until
they are smooth, add the yoghurt, milk and oil and beat again until everything is well mixed. Stir your eggy mixture into the flour mixture with a large spoon until it has been only lightly mixed. The tricky bit now, as you have to be a quick on your toes, split the mixture evenly between all the paper cases before shoving them in the oven on a centre shelf for 16–18 minutes or until they are well risen and a golden brown colour. When ready take them out and leave
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
them to rest on a wire rack to cool before decorating. For the lemon icing to decorate with, mix in the icing sugar and lemon juice in a smallish bowl, keep mixing until it is smooth and runny. Using some kind of spoon, drizzle equal amounts of the mixture over each cupcake, add your own further decorations/ sprikles etc. if you fancy and leave them to set for at least 30 minutes before getting well and truly stuck in…. enjoy and Merry Christmas. Inspired by a recipe @ www.bbc.co.uk/food
PAGE 59
LIFE(STYLE) TECH - PHONE APPS
N
ew social app Circle is getting a hammering right now, it’s been spread like the flu at the moment with just as many people putting it down as there are singing its praises. The major failing at the moment seems to be the ‘invite friends’ option which kicks in pretty much as soon as you register. This has caused a mass invite across Facebook users to the extent that people get multiple invites throughout the day. So what’s it all about? Well Circle tout themselves as the first ‘local network’ that adapts to your location to throw you links on what’s happening nearby.
The problem is that at the moment it looks good, but content is pretty bare bones unless you live in large city areas I guess – Being West Lothian based when we tried it all we got was stuff for anywhere but our own area… maybe no one had posted anything I guess so a bit of a catch 22 here as you won’t get anything coming up unless local people are posting stuff, so might not seem a good app until a lot more people in your area start using it.
Page 60
The basis of the app itself is to displays things such as weather, news, events and peoples posts based on where you currently are, I’m guessing they don’t have to be your friends, just that they have posted something relating to your area which is pretty awesome really. You can choose what posts you want to get based on whatever categories you want to see. Categories such as trending, friends, events, local news, sports, nightlife etc. Photo-sharing is also set to be rolled out some time in the future.
the app online, it does appear to have, or had, a feature that I couldn’t find and that would have been a sound reason to have the app and that is the ability to tell you who, from all your friends, is nearby you at any given time. So if you were out and about you could quickly find out who else is kicking about… I couldn’t find that part of the app so maybe i’m looking at the wrong app but it does look pretty much the same from the graphics, or maybe its just an iOS feature? If anyone has found it on Android yet let us know and we’ll stick a wee update in.
From my short play with the thing it seems From reading about the app online it does to be an ok app that relies completely on get a fair bit of negative press regarding mass user input so might take a good bit of time before it would be useful to us its ‘invite’ policy and a lot of users have even posted that they have never actually country ‘bumpkins’. There also doesn’t authorised the app to invite their friends to seem to be any options for connecting to download the app, but has. your other social apps like Facebook and Twitter other than for them to access your The Palo Alto-based company is backed friends list and potentially to post ‘on’ your by some big names such as Andreessen pages rather than accepting postings ‘from‘ Horowitz, Ashton Kutcher, Ron Conway, David them (or syncing) like what you can do with Sacks and more. The company claims it’s now say Facebook and Twitter, Twitter lets you drawing in more than a million new members automatically post your Tweets to FB. The each month and now tops ten million users. addition of this feature would have made it So expect to see the app popping up for a pretty much a MUST HAVE social platform, while yet. but without it I’m a bit lost as to how useful it actually is as I can’t see too many CIRCLE people happy to have £FREE yet another social platform to manually Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine manage. Contributor On a social note, when reading about
GG
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
I
come from a pretty big family with 2 brothers and 2 sisters making 5 of us and every year at this time we used to write down our wee Santa lists, putting down on paper all the amazing gifts we wanted to see under the tree on Christmas morning. We would give them to mum and dad and they would carefully place them on the open coal fire where they would slowly burn away leaving a wee pile of papery ash behind. Mum and Dad would then scoop up the ash in the shovel used for the coal and gently hold it up to the chimney where it would, as if by some form of Christmas magic, be whisked away up the chimney and off to the North Pole where Santa and his wee elf buddies would do their best to make them for you. Now bikes fair enough, but how they ever managed to create those wee Subbuteo guys I’ll never know (look it up kids). There has always been various ways for us parents to get Santa messages from their children, even if it was just a note popped in the post-box or more recently a card or email whisked off to Santa’s catch all email address. Now with modern mobile technology we have an even wider choice and we welcome the Santa Portable North Pole 2013 app with open arms to bring us the full blown magic of modern day Christmas.
PNP Portable North Pole service has been available for a while online, which lets parents personalize a video call from Santa that they can have done for their children for FREE, although there are lots of other services available for free or at pretty low costs to help you get the festive message out there. The PNP one in particular I like as the finished product is pretty top notch and finished instantly so no waiting around. When you done simply email the link to the person you are sending it to, or their parents and watch the love coming right back at you ;-) Now available for both the Android and iOS platforms, The PNP Portable North Pole 2013 apps gives us parents access to our PNP accounts from anywhere, so we can produce premium video and phone calls messages from Santa whenever we happen to ummm… remember, know what I mean? If you fancy going for a premium videos they are almost six minutes long and can have up to 20 personalization options within them. The Santa phone calls can have up to 10 different personalized items. The app allows you to access your account to see all of your created PNP videos and there is also a special kids section with Advent calendars and a whole lot more. On the whole a great wee app and a great FREE service.
PNP PORTABLE NORTH POLE 2013
£2.49 / £2.31 Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
GGGGG DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAGE 61
LIFE(STYLE)
PHONE APPS CHART
CHECKOUT THIS M FREE AND PAID APPS ON BO
TOP 10 FREE APPS
Page 62
TOP 10 PAY APPS
1
Advent 2013, 25 Christmas apps MagicSolver.com Ltd.
2
Clumsy Ninja NaturalMotion
2
Football Manager Handhe ld™ 2014 £6.99 SEGA
3
ElfYourself by OfficeMax Magic Mirror LLC
3
Stickman Soccer - £0.69 Robert Szeleney
4
Jelly Splash wooga
4
Toca Hair Salon Me - £1.99 Toca Boca AB
5
QuizUp: The Biggest Trivia Game In The World! Plain Vanilla Corp
5
Minecraft – Pocket Editio n - £4.99 Mojang
6
WhatsApp Messenger WhatsApp Inc.
6
Angry Birds Star Wars II - £0.69 Rovio Entertainment Ltd
7
Papa Pear Saga King.com Limited
7
Free Music Download Pro - £1.99 Alfadevs
8
4 Pics 1 Movie! Game Circus LLC
8
The Amazing Spider-Man - £0.69 Gameloft
9
BBM BlackBerry Limited
9
7 Minute Workout Challe nge - £1.49 Fitness Guide Inc Health & Fitnes
10
Snapchat Snapchat, Inc.
1
10
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
Icycle: On Thin Ice - £0.69 Chillingo Ltd
Plague Inc. - £0.99 Ndemic Creations
PHONE APP CENTRAL
MONTHS TOP 10 OTH ANDROID AND IPHO N
E
TOP 10 FREE APPS 1 2
1
WhatsApp Messenger
2
Skype - free IM & video calls
3
Official eBay Android App
4
WhatsApp Inc.
3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Skype
eBay Mobile
5
King.com
Jelly Splas
6
BBC Media Player
7
Wooga
BBC Media Applications Tech BBC Media Applications Tech
8
Snapchat
9
10
Snapchat, Inc. Instagram
SwiftKey 3 Keyboa
rd - £2.99
TouchType Ltd
Minecraft – Pock et Edition - £4.99
Mojang
Football Manager Handheld 2014 £6.99 SEGA of Am erica Nova Launcher Pr im
TeslaCoil Softwar
e
Candy Crush Saga
BBC iPlayer
TOP 10 PAY APPS
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
e - £2.60
Poweramp Full Ve rsion Unlocker £2.68 Max MP Titanium Backup
Titanium Track
PRO Key- £4.49
TuneIn Radio Pro
- £4.49
TuneIn
Need for Speed™ Most Wanted £1.49 EA HD Widgets - £0.9
cloud.tv
Flightradar24 Pro
Flightradar24 AB
9
- £1.99
PAGE 63
FITNESS
STRENGTH TRAINING FOR RUNNERS Page 64
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
HEALTH&FITNESS
T.O.D. COACHING & Fit inc Studio Gym
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAGE 65
FITNESS
TCO.AOCH.DING. FEATURE
&
M Y G O I D U T FIT INC. S SECTION GOGUIDE MAGAZINE LY TH ON M ’S M GY IO .D. FIT INC. STUD G AND KEEPING FIT. T.O IN TT GE T T.O.D. COACHING AND OU AB OW P NG YOU NEED TO KN IONING AND BOOTCAM IT ND BRINGS YOU EVERYTHI CO , NG NI AI TR , REGIMES. BEST IN EXERCISE BRING YOU THE VERY LIST EVENT TRAINING IA EC SP D AN TS BI HA D EATING WORKOUTS, DIETS AN
R E N N U R R O F G N I N I A R T H T G N STRE
S
arah Robertson came to me a few years ago with dilemma and a challenge, having only been a 5k runner for a number of years, the initial consultation went along these lines:
Sarah -“I haven’t trained in 8 months owing to a double ITB problem as in both legs have been written off by the physio” Brian - “So you need a rehab programme to get you on the mend before you start training for your 5k events” Sarah - “kinda, I want to run a marathon” Brian - “okay no problem when are you looking at” Sarah - “That’s the dilemma” Brian -“Why”? Sarah -“It’s the Jersey marathon and it is in six weeks” Brian - “oh”
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
So based on that we discussed the challenge and despite trying to persuade her to wait a while, we started the programme. Sarah posted 4hours 45 minutes for her first attempt which given the injury and time period for training was a great effort. From there a relationship between Coach and athlete grew, with Sarah coming up with more little goals in between her main goals. Remembering her only goal was to do 1 marathon, in her first year we completed three marathons and a number of 5 and 10k events with a half marathon for good measure. Year 2 was the laughable one “I will just concentrate on half marathons this year”, that lasted all of two minutes when I heard “Will you train me for an ultra”? (An ultra marathon being any distance beyond marathon distance.) The good thing was Sarah trusted me with regard to her training and despite many of her peers and fellow runners telling her it was all wrong, “runners don’t train like that” we kept going. Sarah was introduced to Olympic lifting, kettlebells, sledges, trx, tyres, weight vests, hypoxic training, TUF (technique under fatigue) and so much more. Her running style and programme completely changed introducing hill reps, sprints, working the curve in reverse doing speed power then endurance. Most of all she was asked for constant feedback which was something new to her! Sarah forms part of our Athlete performance programme and has kindly given a testimonial which can be read below.
Running a marathon was an ultimate goal. It scared the hell out of me but I wanted to try it just once. Sure, I could have downloaded a training programme from the internet but I knew I needed a bit more of a ‘push’ – and I had a few wee injury niggles to resolve. I needed some help with this challenge.
RS
Having trained previously as part of a group instructed by Brian, I knew he had the mix of knowledge and motivational skills that would get me through. And he did. There was only one ‘problem’. He made this and other challenges seem achievable. It seemed logical after a few marathons to look to other challenges and I wondered how far I could go, could I complete an ultra marathon? After my first 53 mile race, we found out – yes, I could. My goals change and evolve because I gain physical strength and mental confidence from training with Brian. We have now completed two competitive years and I have had no injuries to hamper my training. Yes, training can be hard work sometimes but he also makes it fun too and the results are worth it. Brian makes me realise I can achieve more than I ever thought I could. Sarah Robertson
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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FITNESS FEATURE
THE Sarah Robertson PROGRAMME Sarahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s strength exercises consisted of the following basics, with a variety of others at different stages of the
DEADLIFT
> CLEAN AND PRESS Reason? The exercise involves strength and speed and works the deltoids, trapezius, quadriceps, hamstrings, glutes and triceps.
> DEADLIFT Another strength and speed exercise targeting the lower back trapezius, quads, hamstrings and glutes
> SQUATS The squats are a great strength exercise and target the quads, hamstrings, hips and lower back
SISSY LUNGES
> SISSY LUNGES This exercise - a variety of a standard lunge - is not vastly used but is great for strengthening the vastus medialis muscle which helps to align and track the kneecap properly. If you strengthen this muscle it can help prevent runners knee/knee pain.
> CHARLIES ANGELS A variety of the Gun drill exercise Plyometric exercise aids running economy and all runners should incorporate single leg exercises into their programme, the additional benefit of this type of jumping lunge is the rotation of the torso which helps promote stability in the abdominal and lower back areas.
> KETTLEBELL SWING The kettlebell swing is both a strength and power exercise. The swing strengthens the back, shoulders, torso and posterior kinetic chain, It also promotes functionality of the body as in it works as one unit rather than isolating the muscle groups.
> KETTLEBELL SINGLE LEG DEADLIFT Targets the posterior chain and torso , inclusive of hamstring, glutes and erector spinae which help with posture , which are also involved in running, and jumping, they are responsible for generating hip and back extension power. Aside from the performance and posture promotion, keeping these muscles in good shape is also important for injury prevention.
CHARLIES ANGELS Page 68
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
CLEAN AND PRESS
KETTLEBELL SWING
Since the initial programme Sarah has competed in over 13 ultra marathons (ranging in distance from 33 miles to 95 miles), marathons, duathlons, x country events and is one of only five women in Scotland to have completed five ultra races in the 2013 Scottish Ultra Marathon Series. So what will next season bring for you? If you want the competitive edge you need to speak to us and become part of our athlete performance programme, we cater for everyone from novice to elite athletes and cover everyone from busy mums to CEOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, wether itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a 5k fun run or serious competition can you afford not to train with us! Your competition already has started!
KETTLEBELL SINGLE LEG DEADLIFT DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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FITNESS FEATURE
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAY T.O.D. A VISIT AND SEE WHAT WE CAN DO FOR YOU!
Fit Inc Studio Gym 1 Simpson Parkway Kirkton Campus Livingston EH54 7BH Tel: 01506 413040 www.tod-coaching.co.uk
Team T.O.D/Fit Inc. and one WBO/WBA Champion Mr Nigel Benn
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAGE 73
MOVIES NEW RELEASES
DECEMBER 2013
The Class of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;92
2nd December / 12A
A Long Way from Home 6th December / 12A
Black Nativity
6th December / PG
Frozen
6th December / PG
Getaway
6th December / 12A
Homefront
6th December / 15
Kill Your Darlings 6th December / 15
Nebraska
6th December / 15
Oldboy
6th December / TBC
Powder Room
6th December / 15
Rough Cut
6th December / TBC
Scatter My Ashes at Bergdorfâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 6th December / PG
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug 13th December / TBC
The Christmas Candle 13th December / U
American Hustle
20th December / TBC
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues 20th December / TBC
Moshi Monsters: The Movie 20th December / TBC
The Harry Hill Movie 20th December / TBC
47 Ronin
26th December / TBC
All Is Lost
26th December / 12A
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty 26th December / TBC
How to Make Money Selling Drugs 26th December / TBC Page 74
Please check online or with cinema directly for latest information. DEC 2013 - issue (35)
MOVIE QUIZ
SEE INSIDE
RS
MOVIE POSTER - TITLE & ACTORS REMOVED NAME THE MOVIES PLEASE?
1
2
3
4
5
6 DEC 2013 - issue (35)
BACK PAGE
FOR ANSW E
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
PAGE 77
MOVIES BOX OFFICE TOP 10
THIS MONTHS UK The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (Lionsgate)
Katniss Everdeen has returned home safe after winning the 74th Annual Hunger Games along with fellow tribute Peeta Mellark. Winning means that they must turn around and leave their family and close friends, embarking on a “Victor’s Tour” of the districts. Along the way Katniss senses that a rebellion is simmering.
G G G G
Gravity
G Sandra Bullock and George Clooney in a heart-pounding G thriller that pulls you into the infinite and unforgiving realm of deep space. Dr. Ryan Stone, a brilliant medical en- G gineer on her first shuttle mission, with veteran astronaut G (Warner Bros)
Matt Kowalsky. But on a seemingly routine spacewalk, disaster strikes.
Doctor Who: The Day of the Doctor (Sony Pictures)
In 2013, something terrible is awakening in London’s National Gallery; in 1562, a murderous plot is afoot in Elizabethan England; and somewhere in space an ancient battle reaches its devastating conclusion.
G G G G
Thor: The Dark World
G Marvel’s “Thor: The Dark World” continues the big-screen G adventures of Thor, the Mighty Avenger, as he battles to save Earth and all the Nine Realms from a shadowy enemy G that predates the universe itself. In the aftermath of Mar- G (Disney)
vel’s “Thor” and “Marvel’s The Avengers,” Thor fights to restore order across the cosmos...
The Butler (Entertainment)
LEE DANIELS’ THE BUTLER tells the story of a White House butler who served eight American presidents over three decades. The film traces the dramatic changes that swept American society during this time, from the civil rights movement to Vietnam and beyond, and how those changes affected this man’s life and family.
G G G
Information and ratings from combined sources including Page 78
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
K BOX OFFICE TOP 10 Philomena
(20th Century Fox)
PHILOMENA focuses on the efforts of Philomena Lee (Dench), mother to a boy conceived out of wedlock and given away for adoption in the United States. In following church doctrine, she was forced to sign a contract that wouldn’t allow for any sort of inquiry into the son’s whereabouts.
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2 (Sony Pictures)
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2 picks up where Sony Pictures Animation’s hit comedy left off. Inventor Flint Lockwood’s genius is finally being recognized as he’s invited by his idol Chester V to join The Live Corp Company, where the best and brightest inventors in the world create technologies for the betterment of mankind.
The Family (eOne)
A mafia boss and his family are relocated to a sleepy town in France in the witness protection program after snitching on the mob. Despite the best efforts of Agent Stansfield to keep them in line, Fred Manzoni, his wife Maggie and their children Belle and Warren can’t help but revert to old habits and blow their cover in the ‘family’ way.
Turbo
(20th Century Fox)
TURBO is a high-velocity 3D comedy about a snail who dares to dream big - and fast. After a freak accident infuses him with the power of super-speed, Turbo kicks into overdrive and embarks on an extraordinary journey to achieve the seemingly impossible: competing in the world’s fastest race, the Indianapolis 500.
The Counsellor (20th Century Fox)
Cormac McCarthy making his screenwriting debut with Ridley Scott interweaving the author’s characteristic wit and dark humor with a nightmarish scenario, in which a respected lawyer’s one-time dalliance with an illegal business deal spirals out of control.
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g IMDB, Box Office Mojo, BFI, Film Dates, Google+ DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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f ever there was a movie to truly deserve an ‘18’ rating, then Filth is it. The film gives audiences exactly what both the title and trailer promises; sex, drugs, violence, depravity, swearing, difficult-to-watch scenes and black comedy – and it was very, very entertaining. Filth is a rare example of a film that follows a promising trailer with an even better film. The film went completely beyond
my expectations, and the expectations of those I saw it with. Audiences know exactly what to expect from a film adaptation of an Irvine Welsh novel, and they get what they are expecting and then some. If you are the type of person who is even the slightest bit easily, or even occasionally, offended by on-screen depictions of sex, drugs violence or other unsavoury activities, then don’t watch this movie – because it will almost certainly offend those with delicate sensibilities. The story follows Bruce Robertson, a bent DEC 2013 - issue (35)
police officer. He is everything we as an audience are supposed to despise; bigoted, homophobic, racist, sexist, self-obsessed, a junkie and manipulative are just a few of his character traits. Yet despite this, the audience can’t help but feel for him, even if it’s just a little bit. He’s a perfect example of a messed-up anti-hero. He’s like the 11 year old, 3 legged, one eyed, flea infested and rabid dog at the shelter – repulsive and dangerous, but you know there’s a soft spot somewhere. James McAvoy plays Robertson, and if you think he might seem like an odd choice for this role then you’re not alone; I felt the same way. But he is brilliant. Filth just goes PAGE 81
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to show just how good McAvoy is as an actor. I doubt he’ll win an Oscar for this performance (although I’d love to see any clip from this movie played after those immortal words “and the nominees are”) but his acting is definitely Oscar worthy in Filth. My figurative hat truly goes off to McAvoy – there is no subtlety to his character and he matches his acting to the actions of his character seamlessly. Like I said, McAvoy is unlikely to receive an Oscar nomination for his role despite his performance being Oscar worthy – and that is true for the rest of the cast. Jamie Bell and Jim Broadbent were also fantastic in their role and seemed to fully embrace the madness that they were part of. The pace of the film is really good, it’s fast paced and throws everything at its audience all at once, but you never get the feeling that it is giving away too much too soon. You also don’t feel lost in the plot or that you’ve missed out on (or the film has overlooked) any aspect of the narrative. The film, whilst being very funny, isn’t all laughs and there are definitely some hard-to-watch scenes as well as some stomach-churning ones and some you have to watch through parted fingers. The dialogue Is both smart and witty but, above all, it’s realistic. The audience really gets a sense of realism through various aspects; cinematography, direction and acting, but the illusion that the other aspects worked hard to achieve cold have all been dashed were it not for the stellar dialogue delivered by the actors. Filth really does have all the elements that make it such a great dark British comedy. The film adaptation is strikingly close to the book, but it is not a mirror image of it – film adaptions of books rarely are. But it is loyal enough to the source material to call itself a worthy adaptation and to please already established fans. This, coupled with a brilliantly suitable soundtrack helps to make the film a well-deserved success. I don’t think it’s the new Trainspotting, but I don’t think it ever tried to be. Both Filth and Trainspotting are film adaptations of Welsh novels of the same name and I think that, like the books, they were meant to stand alone. However, if I had to compare and contrast the two, I wouldn’t say that Filth was trying to be the new Trainspotting, but rather it was (and is) the next logical step to take. Filth is memorable, striking and outrageous. If you choose to watch this film and you aren’t easily offended, expect scenes of violence, graphic sex, masturbation, swearing, depression and mental illness as well as much more insalubrious imagery – and expect to enjoy it, because the chances are you will.
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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I
’ll be honest; this film wasn’t originally on my ‘must watch’ list. I’m not overly fond of space-disaster films, and when I do watch them I want there to be some alien life form picking of the crew members one by one in gory detail. Gravity promises none of this. It is a space-disaster story, but it’s a human story. It’s ‘realistic’ in the sense that there are no intestine-hungry extra-terrestrials hunting down the protagonists and there is no spooky space stuff going on. Its narrative is closer to Apollo 13 than Alien. I’m also not the biggest fan of George Clooney and his ego,
but the overwhelming hype and practically unanimous positive reviews that the film received got the best of me and I went to see it. I also wanted to see what bits of the movie were causing people with scientific knowledge to have melt-downs – it turns out it was practically the whole film. I will also admit that I didn’t go into the movie with a good attitude. Apart from the two factors I’ve already mentioned, I was expecting Gravity to be much like the myriad of sci-fi films that have come out this year; Oblivion, Pacific Rim and Elysium, none of which I was particularly thrilled by. But Gravity was a pleasant surprise – it was actually worth watching! It’s far more than George Clooney and Sandra Bullock floating around in space for an hour and a half. The action is really quick to start, and most of what was revealed in the trailers happens DEC 2013 - issue (35)
at the start of the film. I was left wondering what they were going to fill the remaining hour of the film with. But it turns out that there is a lot going on in the vast nothingness of space. The story revolves around veteran astronaut Matt Kowalski (Clooney) and first-time astronaut Dr Ryan Stone (Bullock) who are making repairs to the Hubble telescope when they get an emergency communication from Houston telling them to abort the mission and get back to Earth as soon as possible. This is because the Russians blew up their own defunct satellite (on purpose), but this controlled demolition accidently takes out several other satellites in a chain reaction and now there is debris orbiting Earth at immense speed, which causes mass destruction to the satellites and shuttles in space – including the one they arrived on. Stone and Kowalski must now find a way back to Earth. This film was available in 3D, and I’m on the “3D is awesome” side of the 3D argument, so PAGE 85
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naturally I saw it in 3D – and it is spectacular. If ever there was a film to be shown in 3D, this takes the reigns from Avatar. The cinematography in this film was always going to be breath-taking, but the 3D element is the perfect complement to astounding cinematography. Gravity really is a visual masterpiece despite practically everything onscreen being CGI. If you turn the logic part of your brain off (the part that says ‘this is a movie’) like you would have done with Avatar, then you really do feel like you are in space. The 3D really helps with this as it gives the movie exactly the right kind of depth to make the audience feel the isolation of space. Because of this, the claustrophobic feeling sets in not only for the characters, but for the audience as well, and it really helps the audience connect to the characters and their dilemmas – especially Ryan’s. The true terror, isolation, hopelessness and desperation of being lost in space is (thankfully) something that the majority of mankind will never have to experience – but Gravity (especially in 3D) gives you a pretty good idea of what it might be like. The acting was superb in this film, especially considering there is not a lot that the characters can interact with like in most films, including those set in space. George Clooney pretty much just plays George Clooney, which I found incredibly annoying, but others might like. However, he does have
significantly less screen time than Bullock which I found relieving, but others might not like so much. Initially, when I heard that Sandra Bullock was cast, I thought it was an odd choice, but she was stunning in it. She was both completely believable and likeable. She also made the character relatable to audiences. Of course her characters had had training, but she seemed like an amateur compared to Clooney’s character and spent a lot of the film trying to recall her training or reading the instruction manuals. Most of us won’t get to explore space – but we might imagine that the character of Ryan Stone is not too dissimilar to how a lot of us would be in space if we got there. There was character development of sorts, although it only occurs in Bullocks character. Little to nothing is known about either Kowalski or the rest of the small crew. The script was also quite good, but did have a few drawbacks. I appreciate that it’s hard to fill 90 minutes of script when the majority of the film has 2 or less people communicating, but it was a little lacking at times. There were some really cheesy lines, mostly from Clooney’s characters, and there were a couple of awkward moments during the film. However, I’ve not seen or heard better scripts from a film that practically has only two characters.
can go wrong will go wrong, and you do have to suspend quite a bit of belief in order to enjoy the movie to its fullest. For example, if this situation were real, there is no way that anyone would survive, especially because the space stations are not that close to each other in real life – but for the sake of the film, it works well. However, there are a couple of things about the film that are a little hard to ignore. One is how Ryan manages to pilot a spacecraft with literally nothing more than the ‘eenie-meenie-miny-mo’ technique. There is also the extremely implausible idea that Ryan would ever become an astronaut in the first place. She has only had 6 months training, during which she crashed the flight simulator every time. She is also mentally unbalanced because of her daughter’s tragic death. But if you ignore this and a couple of other factors in the film, it really is an enjoyable experience. Overall, Gravity is well worth the cost of admission, and if you can see it in 3D then do. The long takes are utilised perfectly to bring both realism and suspense to the movie and it is definitely a film you won’t forget. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
Gravity is a ‘sod’s law’ film – anything that
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Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
T
here is no other way I could start this review other than: This film has a bad name – a really bad name. The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia…really? This film made it through the notoriously difficult process of actually getting made, and not one person in the whole team thought to question the title of the movie? There are three main reasons I bring this up at the beginning of my review, the first is simply because it’s such a bad name. The second reason is that this film has no connection whatsoever to the first film.
There characters, story and locations are completely different from each other, why this film is even classed as a sequel is beyond me. The third reason is because the title is so
off-putting that it might actually stop people from watching an otherwise OK movie. I’m not saying that the movie is outstanding, it’s far from it, but it’s not as bad as its title might have you believe. That being said, it is one of those movies where you have to let yourself believe in what is going on in the narrative. The film claims that it is ‘based on a true story’, and this phrase always raises the scepticism level. Personally, as someone who doesn’t believe in paranormal activity of any kind and subscribes to no religion, I can’t believe that any of the one screen events actually happened. However, I do believe that some people interpreted strange unexplained things going on where they lived as something of this sort. There have also been several documentaries made on ‘hauntings’ and this story has made it into several of them before the release of this film. But back to the film. For a horror/thriller style story, there is not much in the way of tension. In fact, it’s a practically non-existent element. It’s a shame, because there were ample opportunities to build up quite a nerve-wracking atmosphere, but they just weren’t utilised properly. The whole narrative
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is fairly predictable too, which also doesn’t help the suspense element. Whilst ghost stories do tend to have a certain set of rules to follow, there are several films which still manage to incorporate plot twists and build suspense whilst abiding by these unwritten rules. Unfortunately it seems that The Haunting in Connecticut 2 felt so bound by these rules that it dare not explore any other plot devices. It also seems as though the filmmakers genuinely tried to (and believed that they did) put several successful ‘reveal’ moments in their film, but sadly, it just isn’t the case. The suspense and plot development weren’t the only places that this film fell flat. The special effects more than missed the mark. I appreciate that this film was relatively low budget, and that it isn’t exactly a story that needs too much from the special effects department, but there are a couple of scenes where they are needed. The whole movie took a ‘less-is-more’ approach to its storytelling and, truth be told, this worked really well for the most part. But the special effects detracted from the overall enjoyment of the scenes in which they were used. As well as being quite basic, they also seemed a PAGE 91
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little unoriginal. The main bad guy seemed a little too reminiscent of Christopher Nolan’s Scarecrow from the Dark Knight trilogy, and a lot of the other aspects of the special effects looked like they were plucked right out of a carnival ghost train ride. As this story is, as its awful title suggests, a ghost story there are plenty of expected ghost-movie tropes. In fact, this film pretty much has all of them; a dream that isn’t really a dream, ghosts in white dresses, swings swinging by themselves and the one ghost that pretty much stalks the child character. However, the film wasn’t all bad. The incorporation into the story of the Underground Railroad was quite unique, and although any twists that the story had are predictable, it’s a welcome rarity when a film depicts the ghosts as something more than hell-bent on revenge and wanting to hurt the protagonists. There was also some memorable imagery throughout the film. Like I said, the film takes a successful ‘less-is-more’ approach so there isn’t much gore to be seen, but those scenes that could have easily contained gore are memorable. The film offers nothing new in the way of scares or effects, but it is still quite striking at times. Another welcome positive aspect was the acting. Usually in these types of movies the acting is stale and awkward. Thankfully, The Haunting in Connecticut 2 gives its audience competent actors, and special recognition has to go to Emily Alyn Lynn who played the little girl. It’s rare to find such a young actress/actor with such a natural stage presence. Technically the film was very good, the camera work was watchable – it could have easily fallen into the annoying ‘handheld, point-of-view, shakycam’ category, but instead it stayed solid. The set design was also quite beautifully done and well utilised considering the modest budget. The Haunting in Connecticut 2: Ghosts of Georgia is not going to win any awards, even within its own genre, but it is watchable. I would definitely recommend giving it a go but my tips for enjoying it would be to ignore the title (or even invent your own) and to not expect much from it. If you do these two things then you might be in for a pleasant surprise.
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Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
I
’m not going to tell you not to see this movie because I’m not the boss of you, but I am going to strongly advise you to pretend it doesn’t exist. This movie is the epitome of ‘bargain bin’ movies. It’s not in the fun ‘sobad-it’s-good’ category, it’s in the ‘how-did-this-even-get-made?’ category. This film was not screened in advance for critics, and there’s most likely only one reason for that – they would have torn it apart, and deservedly so. The story follows on from that of the first, but is completely predictable to the point of boredom. Whilst I didn’t fall asleep during this film, I had to fight every urge I had to not pick up my phone and browse Twitter, Instagram or anything else I had on my phone. There is very little going on in this film, and that’s no overstatement. The majority of the camera work is fixed on Nell’s (Ashley Bell) blank and vacant facial expressions. The pace of this film isn’t just slow, it’s glacial. For a while I was duped into thinking that it was slow for a reason. I kept thinking that if it’s moving this slow, it’s because out of nowhere it’s going to speed up and hit the audience with mindblowing revelations, something is coming. But ‘something’ never came. There was no pay-off for the agonisingly slow pace. The film ends as abruptly as it starts, and ends having given the audience the same thing it did before it started: nothing. For a film with
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the word ‘exorcism’ in the title, there was a distinct lack of it. The audience was only given a brief 30 second exorcism scene 10 minutes from the end. That’s all. Even the cinematography was bland, although this film did drop the often-abused found-footage approach and the camera work was much steadier, but those are hardly redeeming factors. The delivery from the actors was abysmal at best, even Ashley Bell’s Nell. In the first film she evoked some form of reaction from the audience, but in this she is little more than annoying. I can’t completely blame the actors though; the script and dialogue were appallingly stale and rehashed. There is, unsurprisingly, a complete lack of atmosphere throughout the film. Any atmosphere was already going to be difficult simply because of the blandness of the script, but the editing didn’t help either. The film was riddled with so many pointless and unnecessary scenes, and these were choppily inserted amongst any and every other scene with about as much grace and professionalism as a doctor performing brain surgery with a sledgehammer and an ice-pick. As if this weren’t enough, the audience isn’t made to feel for any of the characters, even the tormented protagonist! All of them are presented as boring and unlikeable and whilst there is some character development, it’s of the ‘who cares?’ variety. To give an example, the film attempts to show how Nell is attempting to re-join functioning society, so there are several long, played-out scenes of her working her job as a hotel maid. That’s not character development, that’s filler. Nell as a character is not strong enough to carry this sequel - especially because there isn’t DEC 2013 - issue (35)
any real threat from the demon. He wasn’t menacing or sinister in any way. No, instead it seems like he spent the time between the first film and this one watching Twilight because he is now apparently in love with Nell and wants her for himself. But is it scary? Well, how scary do you think it can be when the ‘big bad’ character is a lovestruck demon who only manifests as a person wearing black hoodie and a masquerade mask? There are a couple of cheap jumpscares used, but honestly, you can see them coming and can almost count them down from 3. The ending is a little unconventional because evil triumphs. This is a common trope of Japanese paranormal-horror cinema and they do it brilliantly. They know what they are doing with the idea. This film had no clue and it’s almost laughable. Everything about this film is wrong, and is actually an insult to the first. Granted the first film was no masterpiece, but it was watchable. There is only one reason this film got made: its predecessor made $100 million at the box office. This film is purely a cashgrab, riding on the reputation of the first film. I’m not naïve; I know that most filmmakers make films because they want to make money. But a lot of filmmakers want to do more than just that, they want to give their audiences something; a great experience, a new way of looking at things or simply just a good story, and sequels are often made to push an existing story forwards. This film does not push the story forwards and the only thing that the filmmakers give the audience is a giant middle finger.
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n my opinion there are certain films out there that shouldn’t be messed with. There should be no sequels, prequels or remakes made because the original film is such a loved gem that to even suggest messing with it in any way would be met with outrage and disbelief from the fans. For me, one of those films is Park Chan-Wook’s 2003 masterpiece Oldboy and to my outrage (as well as others) it was remade and given an American makeover. If the fan outrage wasn’t enough of a red flag for director Spike Lee to take notice of, the number of prolific actors and actresses who outright rejected any offered parts in the film should have been a big enough hint to drop plans for the remake, but sadly it wasn’t. Christian Bale, Colin Firth, Will Smith, Clive Owen and Daniel Craig were all reported to have flat out turned down the role of the male lead, and the part of the female lead was offered to Rooney Mara and Mia Wasikowska – both of whom declined the offer. However the remake was still made, with Josh Brolin and Elizabeth Olsen accepting the lead roles. Now I don’t have too much of a gripe with Josh Brolin, I thought he was beyond excellent as a young Agent K in Men in Black 3 – I’m disappointed that he put his name to this atrocity, but I can look past it and hope that he makes better decisions in the future. But I have a major problem with Elizabeth Olsen and it’s not for the predictable ‘she’s the younger, lesser known
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sister of the Olsen twins’ reason. She is reported to have admitted not knowing how the film ended before watching it at eh New York premier. This means that she hadn’t even seen the source material on which the remake in which she stared in was ripping off! Usually, when a film is based off of something else, the cast tend to do research into the original – whether it’s reading the books or seeing the original film/play/ballet or any other media it is presented in. This is just the first of many examples of how this film is an insult to the original, and no one who had anything to do with it cared about the original in the slightest and was instead, hell-bent on creating a remake that was both unnecessary and unwanted. The original Oldboy was so excellent it’s almost unfathomable as to why anyone who had respect for the film and the filmmakers would remake it. The Hollywood version has amped up the sex and violence present in the film, which is not surprising in the least for an Americanised remake. I’m not saying that sex and violence doesn’t have its place in cinema – of course it does –but when it’s not done right it just looks cheap. The original Oldboy had graphic violence and sex at times, but it was handled properly. It was restrained; it gave the audience just enough and created a perfect balance between it and the rest of the film. Often, the most shocking thing about sexual and violent scenes (when done properly) is their juxtaposition and contrast with the rest of the film. The scenes in the remake that struck any resemblance to the original felt as though they were only there because they had to be. Maybe the filmmakers were trying to pass this off as homage to the original, but for those who have seen the original this idea just seems like a weak justification for calling it a remake and a huge insult for doing so at the same time. I was hugely annoyed DEC 2013 - issue (35)
at the changes that the remake made from the original storyline, but none more so than the ending and the motivation of the villain. Again, in typical American remake style, the edgy, morality questioning, complicated and conflicting ending was replaced with a softer, more audience-pleasing ending that fits the American movie-goers ideology. Everything on the screen was pushed along at speed and took no time or care to develop anything in the film, including the characters and plot. The whole movie lacked the heart and soul that it takes to make a great movie – and that statement is true to the actors too. All of the artistic aspects from the original film (subtlety, poetry, originality, grittiness, and stylisation to name a few) are gone from the remake and what remains is a watereddown, discourteous, plagiarised, attentionseeking joke of a film. The original was poetic, had stunning visuals and was new in terms of storytelling and its techniques. The remake took everything special about the original film and trashed them. The characters and relationships from the original film are likeable, believable and memorable. The same aspects in the remake are flat, onedimensional, unlikeable and forced. This remake lacks any sense of intensity, integrity, and meaning and is typical of Americanised remakes of foreign films (especially those from Asian cinema). These remakes almost always result in disappointment from the audiences for one reason or another. My advice when it comes to this remake is to ignore it, pretend it doesn’t exist, and if you want a real, unforgettable cinematic experience go and watch the original Oldboy in all its glory. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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S
o Thor is back. The whole world seems to be riding along on a superhero high at the moment. So far we’ve had Iron Man 1, 2 and 3, Captain America, Avengers Assemble, Spiderman, Man of Steel, The Dark Knight and The Dark Knight Rises and not to forget Thor, of course. Forgive me if I’ve missed one. So these have all been released in the past three years, perhaps? So it was only a matter of time before Thor 2 would have been made. And for all you superhero nerds out there, you’ll be glad to know that Captain America: Winter Soldier is released in the Spring, and not far behind will The Avengers: Age of Ultron and Batman vs. Superman (don’t worry, Henry Cavill will still be around, thank God!) – unfortunately we’ll be waiting until 2015 for these two.
Now the worrying thing about all these superheroes is that there is a very finely line from Carrying on to becoming boring and if I’m completely honest, I wasn’t all that impressed with Thor the first time round, so you can understand my apprehension when I settled myself into the surprisingly empty cinema screen. You won’t be disappointed. The new director Alan Taylor has got it all right! There’s action, humour, starcrossed lovers, mischief, mayhem, betrayal, reunion, death, success and every other possible description that you could think of – I was honestly surprised.
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So from the adverts, we get a pretty good idea that Loki is gonna be back in action (and rumour has it, he’ll be starring in his own film soon!). I so want to go into detail about this but I definitely don’t want to give away the plot. Let’s just say that he’s surprising *winky face*. The film starts two years down the line, after the attack on New York which the whole world loved in Avengers Assemble. The adorable Jane Foster is trying her best to get on with life without her God of Thunder but life is difficult and where would she be without the brilliant Darcy Lewis to provide the humour and perspective? But the planets are coming into line and all the laws of physics have been thrown out of balance so in a moment of lawlessness, Jane becomes the embodiment of the dangerous and powerful Aether, bringing Thor to earth to find her... And so it goes on. That’s maybe the first twenty minutes of the film. You get a bit of an idea of what the set up is like but I cannot fault the humour, the brotherly banter between Thor and Loki , the sense of adventure or anything else in this film. I absolutely loved it – and if you do go to see it in the cinema, remember to stay behind after the credits because there’s a sneaky little clip which you just cannot miss! Trust me, you’ll understand when you see (I am so keen to tell you but it will ruin everything for you!!). Natasha Orme GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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ay the odds be ever in your favour!
Katniss is back! She overwhelmed all the people of Panem in her daring, desperate and breathtaking victory in the 74th Hunger Games. With the hot demand for a sequel, Suzanne Collins’ book Catching Fire was bound to make it on to the big screen at some point. I can tell you I’m already crying within the first twenty minutes of this stunning performance. Jennifer Lawrence is above and beyond anything that can be expected as she plays the tormented Katniss Everdeen.
I’m not going to give anything away because I know that most people reading this are probably wanting to watch it for themselves. As we can see from the adverts, Katniss isn’t as safe from the 75th Hunger Games as she would originally have thought. That’s right, she’s being thrown back to the wolves but this time a lot more is at stake. There is an uprising and Katniss needs to do all she can to put out the flame and return peace to the whole of Panem or she might lose more than just her own life. Ahhh I so want to go into more detail but I think I might have given away a little too much already. You get the idea though. This film is bigger, better and nastier than the last. The question going through all our minds is, what’s going to happen. It would be foolish of mine to not mention
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the books and the almost perfect reenactment of the wonderfully adventurous stories by Suzanne Collins. The Hunger Games Trilogy has enchanted the whole world and the whole reason comes down to the unique story. Collins has bypassed Twilight (and I won’t go as far to say she’s bypassed Harry Potter) but she has definitely put many other teen fiction books to shame. I will give a word of warning for the more sensitive viewers out there, I know that the Hunger Games isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. It is a brutal dystopian world run by corrupt power-hungry people with complex and disturbing morals. So I’m just going to say, not for the faint-hearted. Natasha Orme GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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TV&DVD DVD TOP 10
1 2
THE WOLVERINE (20TH CENTURY FOX HE) MONSTERS UNIVERSITY (WALT DISNEY)
3
NATIVITY 2 - DANGER IN THE MANGER (ENTERTAINMENT ONE)
4
MICKY FLANAGAN - BACK IN THE GAME - LIVE (CHANNEL 4 DVD)
5
THE GREAT GATSBY (WARNER HOME VIDEO)
THIS MONTHS DVD TOP 10 6 7
PACIFIC RIM (WARNER HOME VIDEO)
8
THE WOLVERINE/WOLVERINE XMEN ORIGINS (20TH CENTURY FOX HE)
9
THE SMURFS - A CHRISTMAS CAROL (SONY PICTURES HE)
10
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MRS BROWN’S BOYS - MRS BROWN RIDES AGAIN (UNIVERSAL PICTURES)
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THE HUNGER GAMES (LIONSGATE)
TH...
OUT NOW AND THIS MON
new dvds CAL AT YOUR LO
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VIDEO SHOP
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TV&DVD TV FEATURE
X F O K C I P ’S E D I U G GO DOCTOR WHO
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
DR WHO
DOWNTON ABBEY
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
BBC One / Christmas Day @ 7:30pm
M
att Smith’s hour-long farewell episode will run on on Christmas Day
Smith's farewell episode will be sandwiched between the Call the Midwife Christmas special and EastEnders on BBC1 and goes up against Coronation Street, which runs across the same hour – 7:30-8:30pm – over on ITV. In the Time of the Doctor will see Smith battling some of the Time Lord's deadliest enemies, including Daleks, Cybermen, Silents and Weeping Angels, before transforming into Peter Capaldi's new Doctor – presumably after first solving the problem of having run out of regenerations... Source (www.radiotimes.com)
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CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
T
he Crawleys will be back on our TV screens on Christmas Day at 8:30pm on ITV
It's time to get excited. There are only 22, yes 22, days left. You know, until the Crawley's are back on our TV screens. (Although the presents, turkey dinners and chocolate oranges associated with 25 December are obviously very welcome too.) That's right, the air date and time for Downton Abbey's Christmas
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
ITV / Christmas Day @ 8:30pm
special has been confirmed. We will all be sitting down on our sofas to watch a two-hour long episode, starring Violet, Mary, Edith and co, on Christmas Day at 8:30pm on ITV. For those of you who are fans of EastEnders as well as Downton, this poses a bit of a problem as the shows are going head to head. It's time to work out where your festive loyalties lie, people...
Source (www.bbc.co.uk)
XMAS TV SHERLOCK SERIES 3: THE EMPTY HEARSE SHERLOCK
SERIES 3: THE EMPTY HEARSE
BBC 1 / WED 1st JAN @ 9pm
B
enedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman return on Wednesday 1 January.
Only twenty-one hours of 2014 won’t have a new series of Sherlock in them, the final Christmas and New Year television schedules reveal. That’s right; Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman fans will be treated to the first episode of series 3, The Empty Hearse, at 9pm on BBC1 on Wednesday 1 January. The episode will last one hour and twenty five minutes, finishing at 10.25pm. The much-anticipated show will finally reveal how Sherlock survived the seemingly fatal plummet from the roof of Bart’s Hospital in the Reichenbach Fall, watched by nearly 10m viewers on 15 January 2012 on BBC1. Sherlock series three will continue on Sunday 5 January 2014 with The Sign of Three and conclude on Sunday 12 January with His Last Vow. Source (www.radiotimes.com)
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
TV FEATURE
X F O K C I P ’S E D I U G GO CALL THE MIDWIFE
I
n Poplar, Christmas 1958 is not just about the opening of presents, but also the closing of deep wounds. Wartime trials are relived - and a new enemy confronted - before peace and love are restored to centre stage. Fairy lights festoon the streets as Jenny’s relationship with Alec continues to blossom and Shelagh prepares for her quiet wedding to Dr Turner. Suddenly, Nonnatus House is awoken by a hammering on the door. But this time, it’s not a panicking father, it’s the police. Just around the
STAR DANNY DYER TO TAKE ON DOW
BBC One / Chri
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
BBC One / Christmas Day @ 6:15pm
corner, an unexploded bomb has been uncovered and the district has to be evacuated. Electrical power in the immediate vicinity has been cut off, and it is dark as the nuns and nurses scramble out of the door to join the crowds of evacuated residents scurrying down the pitchblack street. As the community struggles to stop Christmas being reduced to ashes, the Nonnatus House staff reach out to those in need and keep spirits high, rekindling the spirit of the Blitz. Jenny is played by Jessica Raine, Alec by Leo Staar, Shelagh by Laura Main and Dr Turner by Stephen McGann. Guest stars include Sandy Toksvig as Sister Gibbs, Raymond Coulthard as Captain Goodacre and Simon Armstrong as Major Fawcett. Source (www.radiotimes.com)
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EAST
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STRICTLY COME D
G
FINAL/CHRIST
BBC One / Final TBC / S
rand Final - Sir Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly present the ultimate ballroom battle.
Christmas Special - Deck the halls with glitter balls… a magical Christmas Day, as six celebrities take part in a festive edition of the nation’s favourite show.
With a stunnin opening numb Lapland, Sir Br Tess Daly once over the merr judges Len Go Bussell, Bruno Revel Horwoo to dish out som and scores.
Source
XMAS TV
WNTON ABBEY
istmas Day @ 6:15pm
DANCING
TMAS SPECIAL
Special Christmas Day
ng Christmas ber filmed at UK ruce Forsyth and e again preside ry proceedings, and oodman, Darcey o Tonioli and Craig od will be on hand me Christmas cheer
e (www.bbc.co.uk)
Both shows will air at 8.30pm, which means that the latest signing to the BBC1 soap will be going toe-to-toe with ITV’s Crawley clan. Speaking yesterday at a Bafta event, BBC1 controller Charlotte Moore said of Dyer’s performance: “I went to the set the other day to watch Danny and he is an extraordinary presence on the set of EastEnders – it’s very exciting. “He’s just a big, big character and bringing him into the Vic is going to change a lot of the dynamics of EastEnders – and Dominic [Treadwell-Collins], who is the new editor of EastEnders, is driving huge change.” This year’s Christmas Day episode of EastEnders will find the Vic under new management after Shirley’s brother Mick buys the Walford boozer, while Janine (Charlie Brooks) seriously considers fleeing E20 before her past catches up with her. ITV’s visit to Downton Abbey will see Shirley MacLaine return as Cora’s mother Martha Levinson, while Lord Grantham is joined by his troublesome brother-in-law Harold (Paul Giamatti). When EastEnders went up against Downton Abbey over Christmas 2012, the BBC1 soap claimed victory in the consolidated ratings – EastEnders had 11.31m as compared to Downton’s 10.28m.
Source (www.bbc.co.uk)
TENDERS
N
ew Queen Vic landlord Mick Carter (as played by Danny Dyer) will make his EastEnders debut up against the Christmas Day episode of Downton Abbey.
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
TV FEATURE
X F O K C I P ’S E D I U G GO
STILL OPEN AL
CHRIST
BBC One / Thursday Decem
THE CALL CENTRE
C
EO Nev Wilshire and his Swanseabased staff are getting into the festive spirit and tea lady Hayley is organising the Christmas party….
The happy-go-lucky CEO, who has a catchy phrase for every
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL BBC 3 / December 17th
occasion and no doubt a plan or two for some sprigs of mistletoe, will be giving us an insight into life at the Swansea call centre at Christmas. If you missed it before, the gist of it is there’s a whole bunch of youthful and enthusiastic staff trying to provide money saving packages to the Welsh public. There’ll definitely be singing. Source (www.radiotimes.com)
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BIG FAT QUIZ OF T
T
he Big Fat Quiz of the Year is back on Boxing Day for another ‘close to the bone’ comic look at the past year.
Last years show raised more than a few eyebrows when Jame Corden and Jack Whitehall caused ‘uproar’ by downing a couple of bottle of the good stuff while munching on pizza throughout the show. They proceeded to
CH4
take pops at a including the Q Philip, Usain B Boyle... what n
Jimmy Carr is edition of the and i for one a baited breath the show... ho less controver someone shou Boyle a call, do and i’m sure h laugh?
XMAS TV
D
LL HOURS
TMAS SPECIAL
mber 26th @ 7:45pm
avid Jason reprises his Open All Hours role when the 73-year-old returns as shop boy Granville for Still Open All Hours, a revival of the classic sitcom which first aired on BBC Two between 1973 and 1985.
In the Christmas special, viewers will meet an older Granville, who has inherited the grocer’s shop from his late Uncle Arkwright, originally played by Ronnie Barker. He is now in charge of the business with his son Leroy, played by James Baxter, a cheerful and good-looking young man who seems to have his fair share of attractive female admirers.
THE YEAR
2013 / Boxing Day @ 9pm
almost everyone Queen and Prince Bolt and Susan no, never...!!!!
set to host this show as usual always wait with to see whos on oping this year for a rtial panel, maybe uld give Franke on’t think he’s busy he’s always up for a
Still Open All Hours will also star original cast members Lynda Barron and Stephanie Cole and has been written by original series creator Roy Clarke. “This has been fun - a great opportunity to work with David Jason again and to suggest how things at that corner shop might look today,” said Clarke. The Xmas episode basically kicks off with a typical day in the life of the shop and its customers including now retired Nurse Gladys Emmanuel and the Black Widow. Granville tries to get a date with his old flame Mavis without her terrifying sister Madge finding out. In typical Granville style Leroy shuns the old delivery bike and finds an altogether more attractive way to deliver the orders. There is also some surprising side effects when a new plan is formed to shift a load of anchovy paste....
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Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
TV FEATURE
X F O K C I P ’S E D I U G GO GANGSTA GRANNY FOR CHRISTMAS
J
ulia McKenzie, Joanna Lumley, Rob Brydon and Miranda Hart are set to bring David Walliams’ best-selling children’s novel Gangsta Granny to life in a special 60-minute adaptation for BBC One.
The comedy drama tells the story of schoolboy Ben (Reece Buttery), who is bored beyond belief after he is made to stay at the house of his grandma, played by Julia McKenzie (Agatha Christie’s Marple, Cranford); all she ever wants to do is stay in, play Scrabble, and eat cabbage soup. Until one day, when Ben’s grandma tells him a story that she was once an international jewel thief, and together they
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BBC 1 / Boxing Day @ 6.05pm
go on a wild adventure to complete the one heist she never quite managed in her criminal heyday – which brings them face-to-face with Her Majesty The Queen, played by Joanna Lumley (Absolutely Fabulous, Jam & Jerusalem, Sensitive Skin). David Walliams and Miranda Hart appear as Ben’s Strictly Come Dancing obsessed parents, Mike & Linda. With Rob Brydon as Mr Parker – a nosy neighbour who could scupper Ben and his grandma’s plot; and Jocelyn Jee Esien (3 Non Blondes, Little Miss Jocelyn) appears as Kelly, the pushy mother of Florence (India Ria Amarteifio) with whom Ben has to dance in a local ballroom competition. David Walliams says: “I am thrilled that we have such a stellar cast of comedy legends for Gangsta Granny. I can only apologise that I am in it too!” Source (www.radiotimes.com)
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
MRS BROWN’S BOYS
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
T
BBC 1 / Christmas Day @ 9:30pm
he Mrs Brown’s Boys Christm Special will premiere on BBC One on Christmas Day (Wednesday December 25th at 9:30pm, it has been announced.
Created by Brendan O’Carroll, Mrs Brown’s Boys follows family matriarch Agnes Brown and her close-knit family. The comedy series, which is produced by BBC Scotland/BBC Productions and BOCPIX in association with RTE, stars Brendan O’Carroll, Jennifer Gibney, Fiona O’Carroll, Dann O’Carroll and Eilish O’Carroll.
In the special, Christmas is just round the corner and no-one knows what Mrs Brown’s grandson Bono wants for a present. He’s already posted his letter off to Santa, so how can she find out in time? Meanwhile, at her family games night, Ag struggles to control her temper when none of th guests will play by her rules. But at least there shouldn’t be any problems with the Christmas tr this year – she’s having a very special one delive
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MRS BROWN’S BOYS
NEW YEAR SPECIAL
N
BBC 1 / DEC 30th @ 9:30pm
ew Year doesn’t get forgotten either as The Mrs Brown’s Boys New Year Special will premiere on BBC One on Monday December 30th at 9:30pm, it has been announced.
In the New Year special, Agnes is a Mammy on a mission – trying to make sure grandson Bono isn’t sent to the infamous local primary school (despite what his parents want). And as if her house isn’t normally noisy enough, she finds herself lumbered with a brand new houseguest – a homeless parrot. At least she’s got her New Year’s Eve party to look forward to – until her guests start dropping like flies. Suddenly it looks like she might be seeing in the New Year alone without her family around her.
Source (www.tvwise.co.uk)
ree ered.
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
TV FEATURE
X F O K C I P ’S E D I U G GO AND A DOSE OF THE USUAL....
8 OUT OF 10 CATS
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL CH4 / Christmas Eve @ 9pm
THE ROYLE FAMILY
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
BBC 1 / Christmas Day @ 9:45pm
ALAN CARR CHATTY MAN CHRISTMAS SPECIAL CH4 / Christmas Day @ 9pm
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DEC 2013 - issue (35)
XMAS TV
JONATHAN ROSS SHOW
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
ITV / Christmas Eve @ 11:15pm
TROLLIED
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL SKY1 / Christmas Eve @ 9pm
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TV&DVD TV FEATURE DVD REVIEWS
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DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS
F
ilm studios these days seem to think that audiences both want and like characters in horror films that make overtly stupid decisions under the threat of death that obviously jeopardise their chances of survival. Those types of characters only work in films such as the later Saw or Final Destination films. When a film is advertised as a serious horror film, it’s insulting to the audience when stupid characters are offered up. The ‘dumb characters’ trope of recent horror films has been beaten to death, and it’s never been more apparent than in The Purge.
When I first saw the trailer for The Purge, I was hyped. I thought it was going to be a really tense film and maybe even bring something new and original to the table. I love horror films, and so naturally I went to see it in the cinema. Horror is a genre that is best experienced in a large dark room with a huge screen and a booming sound system. I can honestly say that I’ve never felt so cheated by a movie. The concept of The Purge was good, and if audiences suspended their belief of the possibility of the narrative of the film becoming an actuality in the real world, like they would in something like Dredd (in which Lena Headey was astounding), then this film could have had great potential. This was not the case for the simple reason of the films in-film explanation of how the Purge itself came about. It theorises that a poor economy and a climbing crime rate were products of naturally pent-up human aggression. Therefore, the Purge was conceived and put into practise to allow citizens an opportunity to vent. This proved to be a successful experiment and remained in place. Really? The writers would have been better off explaining the origins of
the Purge in a similar way to Battle Royale than that explanation, which is rife with plot holes. Dredd and other films get away with it because they went along a more ‘sci-fi’ route, whereas The Purge attempted to firmly plant itself in the ‘realism’ category. Ironically, it’s the film’s utter lack of realism that ruins it. Naturally, a film that proposes subject matter such as this is bound to bring up numerous moral issues and social debates including the ‘haves’ and the ‘have-nots’, unemployment and the 1%. These issues are only briefly hinted at – there is no expansion or exploration on any of them in the slightest. The characters in the film are really frustrating. Lena Headey plays a character who has no backstory other than she is a mum. She’s a relatively weak and boring character. The two child characters are also really dumb. The teenage girl is just a stereotypical teenage girl and probably the most annoying character. She throws temper tantrums and runs off through the dark house by herself for no reason, fully aware that there is a stranger in it. The son is also annoying, he is the catalyst to the action of the film as he is the one to let the stranger in the house, but he does irritating things like seemingly favour the life of a stranger over that of his sister. He also foreshadows what will happen in the film by asking his dad if he could ever kill anyone. Ethan Hawke plays the dad, and, as a character, is so flawed and contradictory. He is flaky in his moral standing and instantly changes his concepts of right and wrong halfway through the film for seemingly no other reason than that was what was in the script. All of this was made worse by the dialogue given to the characters. Nothing that they said had any realism to it. It almost sounded like a parody at times. It all just sounded so forced and was the last nail in the coffin for making unlikeable and dumb characters. What was so frustrating about the characters is that the actors playing them aren’t bad actors. I’m an absolute fan-girl for Lena Headey, I think she’s awesome, but I’m so disappointed that she put her name to this. She triumphs at playing strong, interesting
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
female characters, not weak bland ones. To give credit where credit is due, I think that all of the actors did the best they could with the abysmal material they were given to work with – material at times seemed a little too familiar. The narrative of the bad-guys wanting someone that the good-guys are protecting despite being told they will all die if they don’t hand them over is derivate of Straw Dogs. Having said that, I liked the badguys in the film – for the most part anyway. I thought that the masks that they wore were effectively creepy and were brilliantly utilised in the advertising campaign. Rhys Wakefield as the main antagonist, credited only as Polite Leader, was fantastic in his role. His combination of creepy smile and calm demeanour gave him an aura that set audiences on edge. The lighting department also deserve praise for this, at times the light and shadows on his face made him appear very skull-like. These two good points, along with the two good actors cast in the lead roles were unfortunately not enough to save the film. The most annoying thing about The Purge was that it should and could have easily been better. An original idea was trashed by clichés, major plot holes and a staggering lack of realism all-round. There were too many moments that posed the question, “what was the point in that?”, such as the mobile surveillance unit that the son builds which is inside a half-burned baby dolls head which struck a striking resemblance to a toy in Sid’s room in Toy Story. Having the kid like surveillance and cameras as a hobby was fine, but why in the doll head? It just seemed pointless. The film concluded with a highly unsatisfying ending and contained nothing that the trailer promised. It also had a relatively short run-time of just over 80 minutes, and to be honest, I’m glad of it. The whole film was so predictable and clichéd that it was boring to watch. Perhaps if the film had been in better hands in terms of the scriptwriter and director, it may have lived up to both its own promises and the undeserved hype. There are rumours of a sequel being made, and for the sake of horror as a genre, I really hope it isn’t true. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor PAGE 127
TV&DVD TV FEATURE DVD REVIEWS
G
iven the that Pix did not Monste very little of it go it to be nothing m grab that would r Monsters Inc. to I was completely be better than M every way.
There was so much mo had let on, and there w itself than the narrativ off as enemies and bec audience for Monsters really do think that the more in mind. The who movie, and it has all of movie and the college who went (or those wh movies) would remem nostalgia strings with i the jocks to ultimate Fr up tables. There is no d form after having stum films. They have also re (think Finding Nemo, T a funny one, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fo
Monsters University is children. I watched it w were howling all the w offering small chuckles numerous laugh-out-lo Page 128
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
e last couple of films xar has released, I t have high hopes for ers University. I thought oing into it and expected more than a quick cashrely on the reputation of bring in the audiences. wrong - I found this to Monsters Inc. in almost
ore to the film than the trailer was so much more to the story ve of how Sully and Mike started came friends. Despite the target s University being children, I e film was made with adults ole film is a classic college f the stereotypes of a college experience itself that the adults ho have seen a lot of college mber. It definitely tugs at the its portrayal of college life, from risbee to the overzealous signdoubt that Pixar is back on top mbled a little with the last few eplaced the sweet atmosphere Toy Story and Monsters Inc.) with or the best.
so funny – and not just for with 4 other adults and we way through the film. Pixar isn’t s here and there; it is giving you oud moments that never seem
DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS
Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
forced or artificial. When I saw it, the adults were laughing more than the children – further evidence to support my claim that Pixar secretly made this for adults and disguised it as a film for children. As always, there are plenty of ‘Easter eggs’ to look out for throughout the movie, and for those who are familiar with the first film, there are plenty of references to the first film (including a trip to Monsters Inc.) as well as several cameo appearances from the fictional cast of the first film. The characters in Monsters University are just as unforgettable as those who came before them. The two that stick out the most in my mind are Art (voiced by Charlie Day from Horrible Bosses) and the female monsters from the PNK sorority. Despite this film being a prequel, the plot is not predictable and all of the scenes feel fresh and original and don’t strike too much of a similarity with each other. Speaking of unpredictability, the most unpredictable (and for me, the most impressive) scene in the film is also my final piece of evidence that Monsters University was secretly made for adults. Without giving too much away, there is a scene in the film where Mike and Sully have to scare adults. They know that adults aren’t outright scared of monsters, and so they devise a plan to build up fear and suspense. They do this by using tricks and actions that are commonly seen in (and are iconic to) many serious horror films in real life that are intended for adults – things moving by themselves, loud banging noises and things going bump in the night to name a few. These sorts of techniques would have either been funny to most kids or gone completely over their heads. But these simple scenes will effectively transport the adult audience to a memory of being frightened in real life by a horror film that displayed similar scenes – thus putting both the adults on screen and the real life adults on the same emotional level. It was a very clever and interesting scene which will stay with me for a while. DEC 2013 - issue (35)
But perhaps the most surprising aspect of Monsters University is the message it puts across to its audience. It address the real life truth that some people, no matter how hard they work, or how much they want it, just aren’t cut out for certain things. It’s a much healthier message to send than those of typical children’s films that always show the obviously impossible becoming reality. It also sends the message out though the fantastic ending that even if you start at the bottom, you can get to the where you want to be with hard work, determination and a positive attitude. These two lessons are the kind of uplifting but not unrealistic or cheesy ones that children need to learn (and adults need to be reminded of) and when it’s done as beautifully as it is in Monsters University, it can be really subtle yet powerful. The whole film is full of laughs, but also full of heart and it did remarkably well considering most people in the audience knew roughly how it was going to end because of its nature of being a prequel. It most likely did this by avoiding clichés of both college movies and prequels whilst still remaining a positive underdog story. A lot of successful Hollywood films nowadays are overbearing, larger than life and loud – but don’t have anything to say. Monsters University is a huge production that was successful, but it carries an important message and lesson: learn to accept your fears and failures, but remain hopeful and work hard to make your life how you want it to be. This was a really good prequel, but quite honestly it can stand on its own. If Monsters Inc. never existed, this still would have been a great film.
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W
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hen I first heard that Despicable Me 2 was in the works, I was excited. Who wouldn’t be? Despicable Me was brilliant and was a complete hit with critics, adults and children. Then the trailers for the sequel began to creep onto cinema screens and YouTube. The first few only involved the minions doing something so fantastically simplistic like singing, which got everyone hyped up. Then the theatrical trailers were released and for many people, including myself, a small red flag went up. The trailer was really funny, and when that happens, it usually means that all of the best bits are in the trailer to get people to go to the cinema. That coupled with the narrative, which seemed a bit muddled and almost like a last-minute-approachingdeadline thought, gave much cause for concern. Thankfully, all of those concerns were put to rest less than 20 minutes into the film. There are genuine laughs from the word go and it is clear that the films narrative has evolved from the first one, but has done so in a way that doesn’t alienate itself from all of the achievements, mood ad humour from the first. It seems as though real care and thought went into the production of Despicable Me 2, rather than using the fame of the first as a quick cash-grab for the studios. It has also been made in such a way that audiences don’t have to of seen the first film in order to make sense of this one, but I (as well as many, many others) would definitely recommend seeing the first one as well. The story and plot twists are fairly predictable for adults, but it is a children’s film after all. That being said, Despicable Me 2 does have plenty of moments that make it enjoyable for adults. The minions are obviously one of them, but the other is an element that often makes some children’s films (such as Despicable Me and Shrek) so successful – the inclusion of adult humour. Most of these instances are innocent enough and will go right over the heads of younger audiences, but make it that much more enjoyable for adults. One instance that immediately resonates in my memory is when Gru must dress as a fairy princess for Agnes’s birthday party. One party goer asks ‘her’ why she is so fat and Gru replies, in a high-pitched mock female voice, “Because my home is made of
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
candy and sometimes I eat instead of facing my problems”. As I just mentioned, the minions are an enormous factor for both the success of the first film and the hype of the second. In all honesty, the minions are pretty much the only characters that the audiences really wanted to see, and the filmmakers didn’t disappoint their eagerly awaiting audiences. The minions have a much more central part to play in this narrative, and they strike just the right balance with the rest of the characters – it could have been really easy to overdo it when it came to the minions, but luckily the filmmakers showed some restraint. There is rumour of a minion movie, and I hope that it doesn’t come to fruition. I feel like it could be too much of a good thing and could ruin their whole appeal. The minions are so funny because of how they react in situations that involve other characters, and in a minion movie it’s likely that they will have little more than each other to work with. But back to Despicable Me 2 and its minions. The minions have definitely become more creative and complex than in the first movie. They are more than the banana-loving simpletons that they once were. They have so much more personality now, and have much more individuality; Kevin is different from Dave who is different from Stuart who is different from Jerry. There is even a whole wiki page devoted to showing the differences between the many individual minions and their names and roles in both movies. Ice-cream also seems to have become their form of alcohol, which I thought was funny, genius and adorable at the same time. Despicable Me 2 keeps many of the characters from the first – minions, Gru, Agnes, Margo and Edith, but it also introduces some new ones, as well as a new bad guy. The AVL (Anti-Villain League) is the driving plot device throughout the film, and introduces us to Lucy; Gru’s new partner. Her character might become a little over-bearing for adults at times and her mannerisms and optimistic attitude is very reminiscent of Dory from Finding Nemo, but nonetheless her voice acting is superb. Despicable Me 2 is a worthy sequel to the epic first film. Whilst the story of the second isn’t as strong as the first, it is definitely funnier. As always, the graphics and animation are incredibly detailed (look out for the sand and the minions’ tongues) and the whole film is presented in a lush, beautiful way. It is definitely a film worth multiple viewings, as there is plenty of stuff going on in the background that you may miss the first time round. Although the title doesn’t really fit anymore (Gru isn’t despicable anymore), this is definitely a feel-good movie and is ideal viewing if you are in a bad mood that you want to get out of. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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O
kay, so they brought you the gruesome yet funny Shaun of the Dead (2004). They brought you the creepy conspiracy of Hot Fuzz (2007). Then they brought you the alien Paul (2011). (That last one created so much confusion.) After so much waiting, they finally give us the third cornetto film! But if I’m honest, don’t get too excited. Now I love the other films, even Paul, despite the fact that it’s a stand alone. So I was super keen in wanting to watch the last cornetto film but it wasn’t all that it seemed to be. I’ll break it down for you. Introducing Gary King (Sean Pegg). Gary has issues, and I mean serious issues. He’s wanting to be the same person he was when
he was 18 so he tracks down his old buddies to try and have one last go at the golden mile in their wee little home town of Newton Haven. Yet, as expected, his buddies have grown up. They all have families, businesses, successful jobs, children etc. so it’s clear that Gary is the only one holding onto the past so hard it’s become his reality. There is so much potential here and I do think Pegg and Frost utilised to the max.
Some of the writing is a little of a letdown in the sense that dialogue becomes clunky and repetitive towards the end but the actual ending of the film is quite good and it gives pause to thought as to whether the world will eventually end up like that. Now I’ve got you intrigued, haven’t I? *winky face* I won’t give out any spoilers; I do that too often for other films.
What disappointed me was that I think I must have been about half an hour into the film and I was still waiting for the funny bits to come. It was quite slow moving, and the context behind it was quite complicated, but this was deliberate. There’s nothing better than watching drunk men trying to get their heads around something complicated.
As much as it may sound like I’ve ripped this film apart, it’s not all that bad. Maybe our standards have just been set so high with the other films. The World’s End is definitely watchable, especially if your after some violent action, you just have to look past some of the flaws and appreciate it for the conclusion to the cornetto trilogy that it is.
Nick Frost plays the ‘I-don’t-drink’ Andy but as you can guess, that doesn’t last throughout. When the realisation that the whole town has become robots, everything goes to hell and there are some absolutely fantastic fighting scenes. I think Frost’s is probably my favourite.
P.S. You’ll love the cornetto reference
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
Natasha Orme GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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f you would have told me a few years ago that I wouldn’t be rushing out to the cinema to see a new Wolverine film I would have slapped you in the face. But time has not been kind to the franchise. Don’t get me wrong X-Men First Class was outstanding but if I never see X-men origins: Wolverine or X-men: The Last Stand again I could die a happy man. It’s not just that they were bad, but they almost destroyed an entire franchise and were a total let down after the first two. Especially after hinting the Pheonix saga at the end of X-men 2 what actual happened in X-men: The last stand was so bad that I wanted to punch Brett Ratner in the face, but I generally have that feeling after watching one of his films.
So enter The Wolverine, I wasn’t expecting much. So the film began as I sat down with my kebab and immediately I was blown away by how good this is. It has all the good feelings you’d want from an X-Men film. It has Logan dealing with the emotional turmoil of murdering the love of his life. It didn’t even register with me that this is the first film to take place after The Last Stand and I was more than pleased to see the old man having to deal with such a huge event in his life. Then of course the film stepped it up, and it continued to do so throughout. Building up to a climax that I don’t think it could have been capable of delivering. Don’t get me wrong the end may be a little quick for some people but it works really well within the capacity of the film. Ultimately between this and First Class I’m almost willing to forgive the other 2, add to that the mid credit hint towards the upcoming Days of Future Past and what you end up with is a modern day classic Marvel film that’s highly enjoyable. I actually find myself hoping they make another one, and more films with more of the characters that live in the franchise. We need a Kitty Pride film dammit. I never thought I’d ever hear myself say that either, clearly I need a lie down. Gid.
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nly God Forgives has a lot to live up to, I mean the directors previous films Drive and Bronson were works of art so to say I was expecting this to be no less than perfect is an understatement. Just as well it’s freaking awesome then isn’t it. It’s hard to go into too much detail with it. It’s one of those I could mention that but I may ruin everything things. Like the directors other films it doesn’t rush around but takes it’s time to get where it needs to go. It relies heavily on the lead actors and yet again Ryan Gosling (who has almost been forgiven for the Notebook, but not quite) delivers a performance of someone far more advanced in years than he is. I mean the guy was in the Mickey Mouse clubhouse yet keeps delivering these phenomenal performances. He has his haters right enough but I’m not one of them. Apart from The Notebook, too many women have made me watch that film for me to ever forgive him fully for it. So the film follows Ryan Gosling who runs a Muay Thai club which serves as a front for drug smuggling. I mean it wouldn’t be my first choice but apparently that’s what all the gangsters want. Anyway, it all turns into a bit of a western as Gosling goes around seeking revenge and beating people up. In a normal directors hands this would just be a crappy dirty film but Refn turns it into a thing of beauty, you become engrossed in the characters who aren’t even particularly well written but the acting is so good it just drags you in kicking and screaming. In the end it kind of turns into a bit of a classic western but set in modern day Thailand. A lot of people won’t like it due to the speed of it all but I loved it and can’t wait to see what Refn comes up with next. I would say I look forward to the next Gosling film but he made the Notebook so you know, screw that guy.
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James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS MYMHM ? MOVIES
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very now and then a film comes along, and well. It makes you wish you could wipe all memory of it from your mind. Don’t get me wrong I like a bad film now and then. Hell, I have a Troll 2 tattoo. I don’t even mind the odd bad taste comedy but this one is even worse than Freddie Got Fingered.
Yeah, finally someone has made a comedy film that’s worse than Freddie Got Fingered. I genuinely never thought that would happen. It’s almost like they unlocked a new achievement in failing. To make things worse it’s a film filled with bizarre sketches, so it doesn’t only fail to be funny once but multiple times throughout. You may think that I’m being harsh, I mean InAPPropriate comedy has Oscar winning Gillette advert starring Adrien Brody in it. I have no idea why he decided this was the script he wanted to do but apparently it was. He stars as Flirty Harry who makes weird gay innuendo to people. That’s the whole sketch. Or there’s the scarred of life moment right at the start of the film when Lyndsay Lohan performs the famous grate scene from the Seven Year Itch. When I say performs I really mean ruins and completely destroys one of the iconic film moments of the last century. While I’m at it, what the hell happened to her face, she has become a walking anti-drugs advert and the whole thing is rather sad since she can actually act. We also have Blackass, a parody of Jackass. I mean they actually made a parody of jackass for this film. A Porno review show with Rob Schneider and Michelle Rodriguez, the main joke in it is the guy in the back is masturbating the whole time. I could go on but it just gets worse, the sketches don’t get better. If anything they make you die a little inside. There’s nothing even remotely pleasant about this film. It’s the worst kind of garbage and a complete waste of the talent involved. I urge you to stay away from this. It’s worse than Freddie Got Fingered. How is that even possible???
James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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pparently it is the season to be jolly, but since I pretty much covered all the best of Christmas in last year’s festive extravaganza I thought this year I’d get back to business and cover the sublime low budget horror Excision. Now it’s called a horror, but I’m not sure I’d label it that. It’s more about a teenage girl struggling to find herself in her rather deluded and disturbed world. The funny thing is she doesn’t see this at all. As far as she is concerned everyone else is wrong and just trying to prevent her from fulfilling her potential. She goes to bizarre lengths to please her crazy controlling mother (Traci Lords) and little sister who is suffering from Cystic Fibrosis (Modern Families Ariel Winter). So she wants to go into medicine to heal her. You know, so she can save the day and make everyone love her. The film is laced with clips of this other bizarre world she seems to live in. In which she performs surgery and is surrounded by weird in wonderful things in a strange white sterile environment. She goes around struggling with social situations while underneath the film lurks an intense humming of evil behind every action she makes. It’s a hard sell of a film. It’s from first time film maker Richard Bates Jnr and stars AnnaLynne McCord from 90210. She is completely unrecognisable from that role here as she delivers such a powerful performance. There’s no way from watching this you’d assume she was the same actress from such a horrendous TV show. As the film goes to reach its powerful climax you can tell that it’s not going to end well for the main people involved. The problem is you’re not sure who’s going to come out worse until the final frame. It’s just a master class in film making and I can’t wait to see what the director comes out with next. It’s also now available on Netflix in the UK so you can try before you buy. It does spoil us with its filmy goodness. Have a safe Christmas and I’ll be back with more weird and wonderful films in the New Year. James McCulloch GoGuide Magazine Contributor
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ow to make money selling drugs is a straight up look into the gritty world of the underground drug trade in America which aims to teach people to better themselves financially with the aid of addictive chemicals.
Featuring stories and tips from an array of drug lords, DEA enforcers, journalists, smugglers and 50 Cent, the movie works as a step-by-step guide to help you on your way up the corporate ladderâ&#x20AC;Ś the one on the streets.
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After flashing ridiculously overreaching incomes on the screen over and over again, the urban hip-hop style documentary proceeds to 'big up' cocaine and weed as a sort of get out clause for the poor and a kind of pr*ck-intensifier for the rich. The movie courageously highlights the greed of America's industrial agenda as well as bringing to light the damage caused by the establishment in being the only ones fighting a bogus war. But it also raises the importance of never overdoing it, because there's a heavy price to be paid if you suck at doing drugs. Especially in a country where the lives of hundreds of college kids are ruined everyday by red-faced politicians and gun lovers who grew up without google, just the catastrophic embarrassment that was Harry Anslinger for moral and political guidance.
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Although HTMMSD comes across as an overproduced training video for all the aspiring Scarfaces out there, it is in fact focused on revealing the real problems facing Middle America due to poorly constructed legislation. Whether or not you agree with this movie, or even like it, it raises a lot of questions which desperately needed to be asked and inspires free thought, which is more than most media projects ever accomplish. Words by Christopher Jordan for GoGuide Magazine Contributor
DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS
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GAMING CHARTS
PS3 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
X-BOX
The Top 10 BoxOffice games for Playstation, Xbox and PC this month.
1 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS 2 FIFA 14 3 LEGO MARVEL SUPER HEROES 4 GRAND THEFT AUTO V
6 BATTLEFIELD 4 7 NEED FOR SPEED: RIVALS 8 BATMAN: ARKHAM ORIGINS 9 WWE 2K14
5 ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK 10 SKYLANDERS SWAP FORCE FLAG
1 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
6 BATTLEFIELD 4 7 SKYLANDERS SWAP FORCE
2 FIFA 14 8 BATMAN: ARKHAM 3 LEGO MARVEL SUPER ORIGINS HEROES 4 ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK 9 WWE 2K14 FLAG 10 DISNEY INFINITY 5 GRAND THEFT AUTO V
CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
PC
1 FOOTBALL MANAGER 2014 2 3 4 5
FOOTBALL MANAGER 2014
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6 THE SIMS 3: INTO THE FUTURE ASSASSIN’S CREED IV: BLACK 7 ROME: TOTAL WAR II FLAG BATTLEFIELD 4 8 THE SIMS 3: UNIVERSITY LIFE THE SIMS 3 9 THE SIMS 3: ISLAND PARADISE CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS 10 WORLD OF WARCRAFT: MISTS OF PANDARIA
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JULY DEC 2013 2013 -- issue issue (30) (35)
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nother year, another Call of Duty, what’s the difference? Since the reveal trailer for COD Ghosts it looked like we were being promised a new style of gameplay and an interesting in depth story and plot-line and what did we get in the end?... well if you have played any other Call of Duty games then you already know.
Call of Duty Ghosts, with the ‘Ghosts’ element being an elite, almost mythical, unit of hardened soldiers, sees the player take control of Logan Walker who is accompanied by his brother David. After an orbital attack caused by ‘The Federation’ leaves several south-western United States cities completely annihilated with Logan, David and their Father Elias barely managing to escape, Ghosts takes place ten years later with the American forces fighting off The Federation. You don’t start off as part of the Ghosts, it’s more a case of they need more recruits and Logan and David are the best choice when the opportunity arises and you and your brother join the ranks of the famous Ghosts. DEC 2013 - issue (35)
Overall though, the story is, to be honest, disappointing. With Activision emphasising that Stephen Gaghan, Oscar winner and the writer behind Traffic and Syriana, was going to be a co-writer for Ghosts, for me anyway, the story simply did not live up to the hype. If you are wondering how Ghosts handles then again I ask you, “Have you ever played any other Call of Duty’s?” If you have, then you pretty much already know the answer. However there are one or two new mechanics to point out. Firstly there is the ‘Peek’ function which allows you to quickly check around corners to see what’s there and the ‘Slide’ function, which works the same way as in Treyarch’s diving mechanic PAGE 143
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in previous Call of Duty’s. The Two are a nice new addition to the series for consoles and it’s nice to see at least a change to the controls for a COD game. Riley, your canine companion of the squad, can be used for one mission and is mainly used to silently take out guards. Sadly it’s scripted and you can’t use Riley whenever you wanted, only when the game tells you too. With Infinity Ward finished with the Modern Warfare Story, it seemed we were promised a whole new adventure with the new Call of Duty, new characters, new levels but there is an overwhelming sensation of Deja Vu with Ghosts. Almost every level within the game has striking similarities of past Call of Duty expeditions. Infinity Ward also introduced Extinction, a new mode which is similar to Treyarch’s
Zombie Mode but instead of Zombies it’s Aliens. The mode isn’t just an endless match with wave after wave of Aliens, there is an objective to the mode, where up to 4 players have to destroy Alien hives in order to progress through the map and finally reach Evac zone. It seems like a good idea but once you have completed a match there isn’t an overriding urge to go back and do it all over again. Multiplayer, the mode that makes Call of Duty famous for some reason, has been tweaked slightly. In matches there are now minor objectives that come in the form of a briefcase that is issued to you to perform some rather menial tasks. You’ll lose the order once you have been killed but it will be left for anyone else to pick up the briefcase. Also now are “dynamic maps” where, during a match, something major will occur that
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has some sort of impact to the layout of the map, such as a petrol station blowing up and maybe it’s sign falling down… Well what can be said about Ghost as a summing up? It’s a Call of Duty game for sure, in fact probably too much of a Call of Duty, if that’s a thing. For me I was expecting something more, something new, and something that Call of Duty has never done before but a complete brand new take on a Call of Duty game was maybe too much to expect I suppose. At least the campaign is playable and enjoyable, for a Call of Duty game, its good but could have been and should have been something better. Sam Sheppard for GoGuide Magazine
Games Review and News Contributor
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B
attlefield has always been pushing the limits when it comes to graphics and especially multiplayer game play, but now on next gen consoles what limits will it push now? Driven by the new Frostbite 3 engine, Battlefield 4 hopes to prove its powerful tech through a campaign that strives for emotional intensity and multiplayer that significantly improves upon its secure foundation. First Battlefield for me has never really been about the campaign, it’s not good to be honest, so let’s get that out the way first. I don’t expect much from Battlefield’s campaigns but with B4 it just seems to be wrong all over the place and a tad predictable at times. Firstly why is the character you play the captain? He doesn’t speak a word, you never feel like you in control of your squad other than the times you tell them to fire at enemies. The AI, especially your own team mates, seem to follow a track on where there supposed to go so if you’re on that track you’ll get in there way and get knocked aside, this is particularly annoying when in cover and you team mate pushes you out in the open and take your spot or if your taking your time scanning the area or even just admiring the beauty of the game they’ll just shove you over the edge or in my case push me over the banisters of a flight of stairs. Talk about advanced fish AI, where is the advanced Human AI?
You also never feel in control of your unit, always following, never leading, or speaking for that matter. You just feel like you’re only here to shoot the bad guys as the AI is atrocious at it. The story never really flourishes and the game tries so hard to make you care for the characters but you never really get a strong bond, in fact you get really mixed emotions with the character Irish. Tthere are also some pointless ‘decision’ moments that try to convey that this was your choice to act, such as shooting the window of the car when it is under water, it effects the story in no way so how does it feel like my choice? The gameplay however works amazingly, its smooth and beautiful at 60FPS on my shiny new PS4. Even though it is just the same old way of getting A to B while shooting folk, it does a good job of mixing it all up and blending the action nicely. Now for what makes Battlefield amazing, the multiplayer, with an outstanding 60 player matches on humongous maps that range for miles. The basics of the Multiplayer haven’t really changed much it’s still really good and easy to pick up and learn. The beauty of online is amazing and running at 60FPS it is amazing how closely it looks to Battlefield 4 on a good gaming PC. All the normal mode return such as Conquest, Rush and the standard Team Deathmatch etc. but new and dynamic maps make a big appearance. New to Battlefield is Levelution, a dynamic shift in the multiplayer maps that range from
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small to large epic scale destruction such as bringing down a skyscraper or flooding an entire street. These moments can be triggered or happen by natural causes such as a sunny Tropical Island that turns into a hellacious and vicious storm. New players to multiplayer, or even just noobs, can use the test area, a small map where everything is available to players to perfect their skills. Most weapons are available to use and all vehicles are there to help you get used to the controls, especially if you want to finally learn how to control a helicopter or jet without getting shot down by a pro. It’s a nice little addition to game to help players improve the gameplay. Battlefield 4 is a firm entry to the series and a strong addition to the PlayStation 4 launch line-up. As the first game to demonstrate the prowess of the Frostbite 3 engine, its explosive debut indicates a promising future for its technology. Battlefield 4 sets the new standard for next-generation multiplayer.
Sam Sheppard for GoGuide Magazine
Games Review and News Contributor
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U
bisoft continues its tour of historical fiction, sci-fi, and conspiracy and makes its latest stop in the eighteenth century Caribbean. Assassin's Creed IV invites players to raise sails across warm seas, but does Black Flag inspire loyalty from its crew or make a case for mutiny? Players take control of Captain Edward Kenway, an inspiring Welshman looking for riches and a wealthy lifestyle. Kenway is definitely one of the seriesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; most enjoyable main characters and isn't sworn to assist
either Assassins or Templars, but as you brush elbows with them, the struggle between factions gains a wider sense of scope. Black Flag's version of the Caribbean is enormous; there are tons of locations and a surprising amount of things to do. The way it all works is that you can seamlessly leave your ship, swim to shore for treasure, and listen to the sounds of cannon fire as ships battle in the distance â&#x20AC;&#x201C; knowing that you could join and most certainly end the fight in moments. Also you can dock at small fishing villages and explore mid-sized islands all without loading screens, however larger places, such as major cities, do load as separate levels. Fast-travel has been modified so that it lets you travel to any unlocked viewpoint, making it relatively easy to move DEC 2013 - issue (35)
about such a large world. In Black Flag there are three major cities to explore, Havana, Nassau and Kingston. Taking provincial forts provides naval contracts along with a clearer view of the section the fort holds on your map, and you'll even gain a small island of your own that you can upgrade. Diving activities create tense underwater experiences as you try to avoid being eaten by sharks while searching for treasure with limited resources of air. Harpooning sharks and whales is a simple but exciting addition to basic hunting on land, which now lets you craft new gear, similar to Far Cry 3. Templar Hunt is a great series of story-based side quests which introduces you to some of the region's important assassins.
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Some famous pirates like Blackbeard and Calico Jack have a major supporting role, and there's more to them than the plundering stereotypes. The supporting cast is loaded with personality and Kenway's journey with these scallywags is emotionally effective in a way the series has never really reached before. And yes, the modern setting returns in a new way, extending the lore without pretending to be something that it's not. The excellent ship battles of Assassin's Creed III have been further reorganised in Black Flag. By simply looking at the correct part of your ship you’re able to launch broadside volleys, mortars, chain shot or fire barrels. Once you've incapacitated a ship, it pays heavily to approach and board it, earning you valuable resources to sell or use for upgrades. Plus, you'll have a choice whether to use the ship to repair your own, add the subjugated vessel to your fleet or lower your wanted meter. With all of this content comes some repetition; tasks like boarding a ship or taking a fort can start to feel repetitive. Many of the smaller islands and beaches are practically duplicates, but there's still a stronger sense of variety with jungles, ruins, plantations, and caves. You'll likely skip over many chests and animus fragments as you
could be overwhelmed with how many there are in one place, but chasing sea shanty lyric sheets, solving Mayan puzzles and following treasure maps all feel worthwhile and useful. Plundering ships is simply a matter of planning; you can use your spyglass to see what cargo the ship is carrying as well as how hard they’ll be to take on. You no longer have to worry about your wanted level on land, but your feats at sea will ultimately attract pirate hunters, and you can either bribe officials or force a boarded crew to lower it. The mood of the sea is constantly changing, from calm sunsets, dense fog all the way to the panic of a deadly storm. Especially on Next Gen, it has never been so thrilling to sail through the eye of the storm navigating your way through water sprouts and huge waves. The combat however doesn’t feel quite right, it doesn’t feel as polished as it did back in Assassin’s Creed III, and the camera angles while fighting on ships just tends to go wherever it wants. Let’s hope for a patch to address this coming out soon. On the plus side, there aren't so many inessential weapons, and an improved interface makes it easier to switch. Black Flag doesn’t have you manage a guild of assassins anymore, instead puts you in
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charge of a fleet of vessels you’ve captured, sending them on trade missions to far off cities and engaging in turn-based battles to keep those routes secure. It tends to make more sense as trading goods for cash seems a more believable than sending assassin’s to conquer a city. Making its return is multiplayer, challenging your ability to find and kill other players and hide from pursuers. It's been given a progression system and a fair number of modes, but in practice, stalking and killing your prey doesn't feel all that satisfying, and the alternating roles feels rather awkward when your ability to kill is taken away from you. Multiplayer doesn't feel all that remarkable, and you likely wouldn't miss it if it wasn’t there.. While the combat mechanics could still be heavily improved, Black Flag's story and its world come together to form a noticeably better and more consistent game than Assassin's Creed III. Not only is it overall the best Assassin's Creed game to date, but it’s also a rather good game for pirate fans. Sam Sheppard for GoGuide Magazine
Games Review and News Contributor
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GOGUIDE’S PLAYSTATIO
FIRST IMPRES
IMAGE @ digitaltrends.com
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ON 4
SSIONS
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hat can be said of the PlayStation 4? Well firstly it’s just amazing! Since it was first revealed way back in February 2013 I have been excitedly waiting to get my hands on my very own PS4. With all the good and bad rumours going about all over the internet i just couldn’t wait. On first boot up were presented with the new home screen and to be honest the User Interface hasn’t really changed that much but has been massively improved and it is now a lot easier to navigate through the menus. A row of icons contains What’s New, TV & Video, Live from PlayStation, Internet Browser, Video Unlimited, Music Unlimited and Library, with any games you’ve installed slotted in by the order of how recently you played them. This whole section is designed to feed you live information, though, so hover on What’s New and you’ll see news and updates from around the PSN, and leaving the cursor on a game brings up a row of extra icons that include things such as new content that’s now available, your friends’ recent activity in the game, community videos and the game manual. It’s all genuinely quick, slick and useful. The old ‘XrossMediaBar’ is just an upwards-press away, and with so much content now having been moved to the PlayStation Dynamic Menu, this is now a clearer and cleaner selection of icons that takes in the likes of the PlayStation Store, Friends, Parties, Trophies and Settings. All are pretty selfexplanatory although it’s well worth exploring the Settings menu to ensure all is setup the way you want. After inserting a game disc I can say that the installation time for any of the games I’ve played, with the exception of DC Universe, takes a matter of minutes. You can even start playing the game when the game hasn’t fully installed. In fact, we were able to play Killzone just seconds after slotting it into the drive. The game continues to install in the background, but the only way to tell is a touch of extra noise from the console and the game itself plays perfectly.
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KILLZONE: SHADOW FALL
BATTLEFIELD 4
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The DualShock 4 is perfect as far as controllers go its slick, the perfect size, the analogue sticks and triggers are now concave for a more comfortable fit. The touchpad on the controller a nice new feature, its only real use is mainly for game that support it but other than that it has no real use for the UI. The Start and Select button have been replaced with Share and Options button, Share allowing you to record and capture footage from either the menu’s or from playing a game or take a screenshot. The PlayStation Button… now, if playing a game, it will take you back to the home screen and you can freely navigate the menus, go on the internet, browse PlayStation Store even with the game on in the background. If you hold the button in it will take you to the usual setting for turning off the console and controller settings etc. You can now suspend and resume games too, when playing a game press the PlayStation button and let’s say for instance you want to watch Netflix you can by suspending your game for the mean time and when you’re done watching whatever you can go back a resume your game exactly where you left off. No more quitting the game and starting from the latest checkpoint or saved game. With Music Unlimited you can now have music playing from the background of your console, but I don’t know if you can use it while playing games, it seems like it wants to do that at times and you even get the option to pause and change the volume of the music. If you have got the PlayStation camera then not only does it give you access to The Playroom but also some basic voice commands, mainly to start movies and games and even to navigate through the menus but also the option to turn off the console. Like the Xbox, you now need a membership in order to play online with the PlayStation 4. A subscription to PlayStation Plus is now needed to play games online but you don’t however need it to access other online features such as internet or Netflix. PlayStation Plus is definitely a good deal with 3 free games every month, discounts and even some exclusive access to beta’s. You do get a free 2 weeks tester subscription to PS Plus with the console but it is definitely something you want for the long haul.
CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS
The PlayStation 4 is a fast, great-looking, and powerful console at a not-too-silly price that also packs the best controller that’s adorned a PlayStation so far. It has a fair amount of good games of all sizes and price points to play from the off, although not as many exclusive musthaves as we’d have liked with some being pushed back till next year, overall though is one heck of a good console and I suppose the pushbacks give us something to look forward to next year.
Sam Sheppard for GoGuide Magazine
Games Review and News Contributor
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s I write this review Celtic are 20 Minutes from going out of the champions league for another season and probably like a lot of Scottish football fans it has been a night pretty much filled with much shouting at the screen with words of encouragement, well I call it encouragement but others would probably call it abuse. For me it’s plain to see all the faults in the game; Samaras isn’t a loan striker in a 4411 formation? Everyone can see that right? Foster can’t command a 6 yard box? We all see that? And of course zonal bl*ody marking doesn’t work? That is only intensified by the fact that Celtic haven’t spent any ‘real’ money in a season where they have probably made the most money they have ever made in one season and with a direct route into the elite of football competitions pretty much guaranteed for this season and probably the next 2 seasons to come, you have to ask why didn’t the board/manager spend money and bring in the best players they could have? Why? Well... that’s reality... but for us Football Manager fans we luckily can get a taste of just what It feels like to be in charge of all those things that have led to the mighty Celtic’s downfall tonight. Football Manager 2014 lets us all put our so called money where our mouths are and kinda shows us that basically No, you
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GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a special one.’’ Jose Mourinho on his arrival at Chelsea
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GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘I wouldn’t say I was the best manager in the business. But I was in the top one.’’ Nottingham Forest’s Brian Clough
couldn’t do a better job mate! It’s a daunting task overall and as all of us who have played the game in the past know.... sometimes nothing goes right for you, no matter how hard you try. First off, no review of a Football Manager game can ever truly be described as comprehensive... there is just too much to cover in the game, too many areas to explore and too vast is the stuff going on behind that sleek default outer skin that an in depth review would look more like a Hayes manual for a family hatchback than a magazine review.
Overview of your team
To be honest I’m happy with that, as I’m classing myself in the strictly ‘novice’ category of player for this review. As a novice most of the hard-core strategy element of the game are simply beyond me must of the time. I’ll try to cover a good bit of what the game has to offer though so forgive me if you’re looking for a more technical look at the game. I managed to miss the last few updates of the FM franchise for some reason, ‘life’ might have got in the way, I’m not sure, because, as most girlfriends and wives will know, it’s usually Football Manager that gets in the way of ‘life’. So catching up with the latest 2014 release I was pleased to see 2 modes of play now available; a
The club info
GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, No, I think they should have got George Graham because I’m useless.’’ Southampton’s Gordon Strachan after being asked if he was the right man for the job Classic mode that allows players looking for a much less intense, in-depth and controlled game to get stuck in right away and leaves the bulk of the background stuff to either get done by your backroom staff, to have way less options involved or for most to just not appear at all. I’m not going to explain what Football Manager is, I’m going to presume that everyone reading this is well aware exactly what the game entails and kick right into the game itself. As usual the first decision you have to make is what leagues you want to be available to you in the game. This directly effects the players you will be able to interact with in the game among a bundle of other things no doubt, the biggest reason for not having loads of leagues in your game is how fast it runs on your computer and how long the background ‘data’ takes to process. I’ve got a pretty high spec PC so l was able to add the maximum amount of leagues available of which there are a huge amount of available, spanning Europe, North and South America, Africa, and Asia. One of the things that FM prides itself on is it’s player rosters and due to the game being released a few months after the 2013 summer transfer window has closed, these are very up to date. All the players are there and in the right teams.
Yout team
GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘Rome wasn’t built in a day but I wasn’t on that particular job.’’ Nottingham Forest’s Brian Clough
Formation and tactics DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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GAMING REVIEW GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘Celtic jerseys are not for second best, they don’t shrink to fit inferior players.’’ Celtic’s Jock Stein
If you are a newcomer to this type of game, then I would strongly recommend you play the Classic Mode first, In the full game the sheer volume of information and stuff that you will encounter, right from the off, will be pretty much overwhelming. For example you’re asked to allocate scouts, watch the reserve team play, attend contact negotiations, deal with the press, deal with your backroom staff... and all before you’ve kicked a ball in anger. The level of decision making that you are asked to take part in sometimes left me baffled. I was actually waiting for them to ask me to drive the team bus at one point.
Training overview
Classic mode eases you in to the game a lot better allowing you to enjoy the core elements of picking the team, choosing formations, working on tactics and dealing with transfers. The general running of the club is then left to others to do while you concentrate on hopefully winning the league or avoiding relegation or whatever it was that you told your board that you would achieve that season. Classic Mode gives you a slightly more basic looking ‘skin’ and has a very different feel to the Football Manager Mode, the in game action is pretty much the same though with the same 3D type graphics engine used News feed page during the number crunching stages GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
“I was just saying to your colleague, the referee has got me the sack, thank him ever so much for that, won’t you?” England’s Graham Taylor to a linesman on the pitch through both modes. FM designers seem to have put so much effort into this pitch view that I suppose now is as good a time as any to talk about it. I have a wee gripe you see…
The new 3D in match display is pretty awesome for a management game
Overall the stadium graphics are pretty basic, backgrounds are nothing special and stadiums themselves are pretty non-descript grey blocks. Crowds are basic to say the least with no real character to them, I did play as Livingston though, so not sure if that is the same for bigger teams with bigger stadiums and bigger crowds? On field is where the biggest changes come in the FM graphics stakes with players now depicted in all their fully kitted out glory. Previous versions of the game have gotten by with very basic representations of your players even as far back to when they were shown as nothing more than 11 numbered coloured circles dashing around a green rectangle. Funnily enough exactly what you get in the hand held versions of the game. The new graphics improvements in the ‘Live’ highlights for key moments in the game (or for the whole match if that is what you have selected) is where I find myself struggling most of all as I try to determine if it is a good thing or not? You see, despite looking really good, and yes, it definitely does leave me with an overall feeling that it does add massively to the atmosphere and feel of a game of football. Let’s face it there is nothing better than watching your team pass the ball around the pitch and finish it off with a stunning goal... nothing better. However... !!!! My problems don’t revolver around
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offensive play but with the defensive play! You see the FM gurus have somehow decided that it’s better that while watching these games you would love nothing more than to see your players plodding along, seemingly refuse to tackle, or to even close down the opposing team for 99.9% of the action, while you, as a manager, shout at the screen for your wee player to ‘’for f*cksake TACKLE him!!!!’’ as he stands and lets the opposing striker literally run circles around him, and I’ve actually seen this happen, and annoyingly not by a £20,000,000 Barcalona superstar... No i mean by a £100 a week part time f’ing striker. They must also think that you like nothing more than seeing them unable to make even simple passes or to score from the easiest of situations? Meanwhile the opposition seems to be able to dribble around your players at will and to score almost every time they venture into your box. It might be me but it definitely seems like you are made to look like a Sunday league pub team in every match you play, even in games where you don’t get beat. And before you ask, this is when playing all the other teams in the same league, with players of equal or better abilities. It doesn’t seem to matter, the engine always portrays your own team as sh*t... or maybe it’s just a Livi thing? Graphics rant over.... I’ll try Barcelona next time.
How things are going on the field
Football Manager mode will be the mode of choice for most seasoned FM’ers and it will give you control over the whole running of the club, and when we say the Action updates appear on the bottom message panel GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
“I was just saying to your colleague, the referee has got me the sack, thank him ever so much for that, won’t you?” England’s Graham Taylor to a linesman
whole running i really do mean everything. There truly does seem to be no end to what you have to have input into right down to the length of the damn grass. Media, board room, player and staff interactions are pretty straight forward with you basically responding to various questions, with your responses or refusal to comment determining how things go in the future. Football Manager mode lets you take man-management decisions at a much deeper level than Classic does by letting you give individual player instructions and managing their training etc. You can take this management to a whole new level by getting involved with looking at what best motivates individual players, finding out why their unmotivated and unhappy and then racking your brains to try to find a way to get them feeling better in some vein hope that it makes them play better; do you give them challenges, shout at them, or sometimes try to keep them calm? l don’t know ? The joy of course in Football Manager is that after hours of crushing defeats and scrapped one all draws you sometimes find yourself l:0 down with only 25 minutes to go, you throw on another striker, change to a more attacking formation, adjust a couple of players specific
Your formation and the oppositions side by side
GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘The only way Marc Bircham will be going to Tottenham is if he buys a f****** season ticket.’’ Millwall’s Mark McGhee on his player being linked with Spurs The title bar at the top can be set to hidden if you like DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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GAMING REVIEW instructions and as if by magic things start to click and before you know it your subbed striker suddenly smashes home a hat trick to win the game in the dying seconds, suddenly you’re feeling like you’re Alex Ferguson. Then in your next match you do the exact same thing and it doesn’t make a blind bit of difference… so was it just Luck?
Sometimes it’s just not clear why a specific tactic is working or failing and sometimes it really does seem like there is nothing that you can do to beat some teams that you come up against. As a test and with a few hours to kill one day I decided to save my game just before each new game kicked off until I lost a game. I then restored my save game and played the game again, each time I replayed the game I got beat or at best drew with the team. On some Occasions I completely changed Formation, Tactics, Players, Instructions ... regardless of what I did it didn’t seem to make a blind bit of difference. For the record the team was 2 places above me in the table, with us both in a mid-table position and a similar standard of players, I actually played the same game 32 times without winning once. I got a wee bit addicted to winning although I never did. It seems that on some occasions countering your opponent’s strengths, finding their weaknesses and having better players on paper can only get you so far. Actually playing FM hasn’t changed massively over the years really, just got a damn site slicker, and a damn site more complicated. The basic elements are all pretty much the same pick a team, pick your formation, pick your players and play some football
Some of the angles are pretty amazing and trulyadd to the game
Transfer Search
GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘Some people believe football is a matter of life and death. I’m very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that’’ Liverpool’s Bill Shankly
Post-match screen GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘My greatest challenge is not what’s happening at the moment, my greatest challenge was knocking Liverpool right off their f*****g perch. And you can print that.’’ Manchester United’s Sir Alex Ferguson
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The match screen can be slit up if into different areas GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘Of course I didn’t take my wife to see Rochdale as an anniversary present. It was her birthday. Would I have got married in the football season? Anyway, it was Rochdale reserves.’’ Liverpool’s Bill Shankly
matches. Sure, between those bits there is a whole host of other decisions to be made along the way and the FM designers have made all those jobs super slick and easy to use but they have also been made them super technical as well and you can easily get lost drilling down into the menus and sometimes forget exactly why you are where you are at time. Everything runs really well in both the modes available and all the relevant into you need is usually only a few clicks away. The match engine looks really good and works well apart from the issue I talked about earlier FM definitely is not designed for players to jump on and have a quick 30 minute game, it is an altogether different beast and truly demands a different level a commitment and sometimes you can play for days without actually kicking a ball, there is a mountain of work to be done during those closed seasons.
Doing not too bad in a friendly against the mighty Newcastle United
So overall the 2014 edition of the game has seen a fair few behind the scenes upgrades, added a few bits here and there like cloud saves, a Linux version, and Steam workshop support. For anyone struggling to yet to grips with the game there is a massive amount of web sites and forums offering reams of instructions, tactical guides, GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘If God had wanted us to play football in the sky, He’d have put grass up there.’’ Nottingham Forest’s Brian Clough on the long-ball game Ok maybe wasn’t such a good idea after all? DEC 2013 - issue (35)
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GAMING REVIEW player prospects, and also gigabytes of custom logos and backgrounds available for you to download in order for you to customise your experience to your own liking. Football Manager 2014 is an awesome piece of software, much more than just a game and the inclusion of the Classic Mode will go a long way to offering younger and new players on easier doorway into the world of Football Manager. The easiest option of all for getting a FM fix is one of the Mobile versions as they themselves are way less intense than even the Classic Mode and you can jump right in and get a good few matches in even during your lunch break.
Player screen
The world of FM is a better place for all these latest versions and releases and if, like me, you have for some reason missed a few of the latest versions then you are in for quite a treat if you pick up one of the new games.
Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine
Contributor
Interacting with your players and staff is super easy GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘At a football club, there’s a holy trinity: the players, the manager and the supporters. Directors don’t come into it. They are only there to sign the cheques.’’ Liverpool’s Bill Shankly on the board
Your transfer shortlist GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘If I walked on water, my accusers would say it is because I can’t swim.’’ Berti Vogts during his unimpressive Scotland reign
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FOOTBALL MANAGER 2014 – 4 NEW THINGS I LIKE? >> MATCH PLAN CREATOR Basically this lets you pre-prepare tactics to be automatically used when various scenarios occur in any match you play. So, for example, say during a game your team are ahead by one goal at half time. You can auto set it to stay as you are tactically, but if you are down by one goal at half time you can set it to change tactics to try to get a goal back. Or if you suddenly go 2 down going into the last 20 minutes you can again shave a set tactic automatically kick in going all out to try to rescue the game, you get the idea.
>> SIMPLER SCOUTING Sports Interactive seem to know somehow that one of the most addictive part of FM for lots of people and have thus tried to make things even easier for those of us looking to scour around the lesser-known places of the planet in search a cheap superstar. I like the way the new system pushes your chief scouts recommendations to the forefront when he wants to recommend players – there is an immediate rating for you to see from the off how good a player is right now and their possible final level of ability.
>> BRIBING FRINGE PLAYERS Unhappy player are a pain especially if it’s a good player that you use for backup to the main squad, it’s a chore to keep them happy so it’s good to see that you can bribe them to sit on the bench with a big wad of cash in the hope of stopping them moaning too much.
>> LESS CONFUSING TACTICS A wee issue with previous versions of the ‘shout’ tactics method was that ant times you could easily get so wound up in a game that your rallying calls could sometime get a bit confusing, telling your players to ‘hassle’ opponents but with another shout demanding that they ‘stay on their feet’ – one doesn’t really fit with the other?
GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘I had mixed feelings - like watching my mother in law drive over a cliff in your car.’’ Tottenham’s Terry Venables
The game did try to stop you doing that but there was definitely occasions where you could issue two kind of opposing methods of play and have them active at the same time. The new FM has taken a massive step forward in fixing this by keeping your available actions in four separate columns now; possession, distribution, defending and general. You will be warned when one action conflicts with another and hopefully stopping you making a fool of yourself in front of the whole footy world. GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
GoGuides ‘Best Manager Quotes Ever’:
‘‘It was a very simple team talk. All I used to say was: Whenever possible, give the ball to George Best.’’ Manchester United’s Matt Busby on tactics DEC 2013 - issue (35)
‘‘Tell him he’s Pele and get him back on.’’ Partick Thistle’s John Lambie after Colin McGlashan did not know who he was after suffering concussion PAGE 169
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OUTABOUT &
IN WEST LOTHIAN
The Bennie Museum
The Bennie Museum opened in 1989 as a museum of Bathgate’s history and life. It is run entirely by volunteers under the management of a Charitable Trust. It has been commended by the Association of Scottish Visitor Attractions. www.benniemuseum.org.uk 11am - 4pm (Apr to Sep) & 11am -3.30pm (Oct to Mar) - FREE 9-11 Mansefield Street, Bathgate, EH48 4HU 01506 634944
Almond Valley Heritage Trust,
Almond Valley is operated as a popular leisure destination that appeals to a diverse audience and promotes learning through discovery, family interaction and play. We also operate a formal education programme. www.almondvalley.co.uk Millfield, Livingston, EH54 7AR 01506 414957
The Garage Skatepark
The Garage Skatepark is an indoor skatepark based in Livingston which is being improved on constantly to give skaters the best experience around. The park is open to Skateboards ,Inline Skates and BMX. Kids under 16 wanting to ride at the park will be required to wear a helmet. The park also has its very own shop stocking Boards, Wheels, Trucks, T-shirts and other accessories. www.thegarage.zxq.net Mon - Sat: 10am - 10pm - Sun: 10am - 8pm 5D Grange Road, Houston Industrial Estate, EH54 5DE 01506 530892
Bankhead Mountainball
Like many ‘extreme’ sports, Zorbing, Orbing or Sphereing was created in New Zealand back in 1994. The concept is quite simple, you build a human sphere which can accommodate up to two fully grown adults, secure them inside then let them roll down a hill in it (hamsters have been exercised for many years in a very similar way!) www.bankheadmountainball.co.uk Contact for opening hours Bankhead Farm, Dechmont, Broxburn, EH52 6NB 01506 811209
Delta Force Paintball
Delta Force Paintball provides world class paintballing in Scotland. In addition to the scenery, incredible game zones provide players with an adrenalin-fuelled day of paintball action all year round. www.paintballgames.co.uk Weekends + 1 Weekday - check online for details Off Burnhouse Road, Dechmont, Livingston, EH49 6PL 0844 477 5050
Funtastic Fantasy Golf Limited
Miniature golf arena but it’s one with a difference it’s BLACK-LIGHT UV which means that not only do the 3D prop’s glow in the dark but also the golf balls and art work on the wall do too. This facility is a fantastic family day out for all ages & abilities with a cafe that sell homemade food made onsite at their cafe ‘Dino Bites’
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Mon - Sun: 10:00 am - 10:00 pm 3 St Andrews Way, Livingston, EH54 8HQ 07935 576943
DEC 2013 - issue (35)
A1 PAINTBALL
A1 Paintball was established in 2002 with one goal in mind, giving their customers an open and honest paintball experience from start to finish and with no hidden extras. They provide only the very best and most comprehensive paintballing equipment and event management. Haggs Road Wood Burnwynd, Nr Edinburgh, Midlothian EH27 8ED 01501 741709
Racing Karts
Racing Karts quickly established itself as a force in Indoor Kart Racing due to its attention to safety, cleanliness and customer satisfaction. They like to call themselves ‘The Friendly Circuit’ www.racingkarts.co.uk Times: Booking required - call to arrange Arrol Square, Deans Industrial Estate, Livingston, EH54 8QZ 01506 410123
Livingston Skate Park
The Livingston Skatepark opened in 1981, at a time when most commercial skateparks were closing and was one of the most important facilities in Britain during a critical period in the development of skateboarding. It is an example of a free, unsupervised facility which achieved international status. Daylight access all year round FREE 16 Northwood Park, Opposite Almondvale Shopping Centre, Livingston, EH54 6HR
Deer Park Ten Pin Bowling
Deer Park Bowling Centre is a 16 Lane Bowling Centre with the capacity to hold 128 bowlers. There is a bar and food served throughout. At ‘Late night Glow Bowling’ the lights are dimmed and the lanes come alive with GLOW IN THE DARK, ULTRA VIOLET lighting effects and music. www.deer-park.co.uk Mon-Thur: 4pm-10pm / Fri: 12pm-midnight / Sat: 10am-midnight / Sun: 10am-10pm Golf Course Road, Livingston, EH54 8AB - 01506 446699
Five Sisters Zoo
The Five Sisters Zoo was established in 2005 and is the only wildlife attraction centre in West Lothian. With over 100 different species of animals, birds and reptiles from all around the world your visit will be a fun, enjoyable and educational one - all ages. www.fivesisterszoo.co.uk Open 7 Days a week - 10am - 6pm (5pm Winter half of year) Gavieside, West Calder, EH55 8PT 01506 871 111
Overboard Soft Play
Overboard Soft Play is an exciting indoor Soft Play and entertainment venue for kids aged 0-11 yrs. They have it all, from chutes to ball pits to go-karts to ball cannons. With an underwater theme and seperate play zones for different age groups and abilities, your children are sure to have a great time from the minute they arrive until it’s time to go home. www.overboardsoftplay.com Wed - Sun: 10:15 am - 6:00 pm 3 St Andrews Way, Livingston, EH54 8HQ - 01506 873888
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QUIZ ANSWERS 1 2 3
THE GOG UID MUSI C QUIZ
ANSWE SONG CLOUDS RS K R O Y W E N F O E L A T Y IR FA ACCOLL THE POGUES AND KIRSTY M JOHN LENNON ) R E V O IS R A (W S A HAPPY XM
LAST CHRISTMAS - WHAM!
4
THE FREEWHEELIN’
Bob Dylan 7
ABSOLUTION
Muse Page 174
NEVER THE BO MIN LLOCKS
5
6
INTIMACY
Bloc Party 8
NOTHING BUT THE BEAT
David Guetta 9
COSTELLO MUSIC
The Fratellis DEC 2013 - issue (35)
CONTRA
Vampire Weekend
ND S IT’S
MOVIE QCTUOIZ RS BACK AGAIN
TLE & A MOVIE POSTER - TI S PLEASE? NAME THE MOVIE
DE
1
2
3
4
5
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CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS 101
H
ouse of Wax is a 1953 American horror film starring Vincent Price. It is a remake of Warners’ Mystery of the Wax Museum (1933), without the comic relief featured in the earlier film, and was directed by André de Toth. It is perhaps the best-known film from the 3-D film craze of the 1950s. In 2005, Warner Bros. distributed a new film called House of Wax, but its plot is very unlike the one used in the two earlier films. House of Wax was the first color 3-D feature from a major American studio and premiered just two days after the Columbia Pictures film Man in the Dark, the first major-studio black-and-white 3-D feature. It was also the first 3-D film with stereophonic sound to be presented in a regular movie theater. It premiered nationwide on April 10, 1953 and went out for a general release on April 25, 1953. In 1971, House of Wax was widely re-released to theaters in 3-D, with a full advertising campaign. Newly-struck prints of the film in Chris Condon’s single-strip StereoVision 3-D format were used. Another major re-release occurred during the 3-D boom of the early 1980s.
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