Nov 2014 issue (44)

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)

LOCAL BAND FEATURES - REVIEWS - GIGS - EVENTS - INTERVIEWS - GAMING - MOVIES - LIFE(STYLE) - FITNESS - ART - TV - DVD - OUT & ABOUT - MOBILE APPS - QU

LIFE(STYLE) / FITNESS / MUSIC / MOVIES / GAMES / TV & DVD / O&A

west lothian

FITNESS WITH www.goguidemagazine.co.uk

T.O.D COACHING


CONTENT NOV 2014 - issue (44) Contents

WHAT’S INSIDE THIS MONTHS ISSUE... - - - - - - - MUSIC - - - - - - -

- - - - - - - TV & DVD - - - - - - -

THE KING LOT (pg4) AUTOGRAPH ASYLUM (pg12) MUSIC QUIZ (pg14)

DRIFTERS (pg64) AMERICAN HORROR STORY: FREAK SHOW (pg66)

Answers on INSIDE BACK PAGE

DVD CHART (pg74)

TOP 10 DVD’S THIS MONTH

WHAT’S ON GUIDE (pg16) What’s on in the local area.

DVD WALL - OUT THIS MONTH (pg75) Some DVD’s being released this month

- - - - - - LIFE(STYLE) - - - - - -

DVD REVIEWS (pg76) TRANSFORMERS: AGE OF EXTINCTION / THE PURGE: ANARCHY / ONCE / BEGIN AGAIN / CONTROL

NOVEMBER BOOKS (pg20) FEEDMENOW (pg22) ANDROID/iOS APPS CHARTS (pg24)

Our top 10 FREE and PAID apps charts for Android and iPhones.

PHONE APPS (pg25)

MOVIE YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED (pg79) MYMHM - ARTIFACT

- - - - - - - GAMES - - - - - - - - - FITNESS WITH T.O.D - - -

GAME CHARTS (pg84)

HIIT TRAINING (pg28)

Top 10 games across PLAYSTATION, XBOX and PC.

WITH T.O.D.

REVIEWS & FEATURES

- - - - - - - MOVIES - - - - - - -

SHADOW OF MORDOR (pg88) ALIEN ISOLATION (pg94) NBA 2K15 (pg100)

FEATURES

MOVIE NEW RELEASES (pg34)

All the new releases in cinemas this month.

- - - - - - - OUT & ABOUT - - - - - - -

MOVIE QUIZ (pg35)

Answers on INSIDE BACK PAGE

OUT&ABOUT (pg108)

Out and about with some great indoor and outdoor stuff to get up to in the local area

THIS MONTHS BOXOFFICE TOP 10 (pg38) REVIEWS

ANNABELLE (pg42) THE BABADOOK (pg48) TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES (pg52)

QUIZ ANSWERS (pg110)

Music and Video Quiz answers

CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS (back page 112)

We take a look back at some classic movie posters.

The King Lot

Who are GOGUIDE...???

Autograph Asylum

We try to ensure our information is correct before uploading but some details are subject to change. PLEASE check online or with each location directly for fully up to date information.

GOGUIDE is a local online magazine for the West Lothian area. We try to be less focused on local ‘news’ and more a targetted on, ‘what’s on’ or ‘happening’ in the local area. We do try to have a pretty modern approach to GoGuide content and eventually hope to produce articles on subjects outside our usual stuff such as Clubbing, Theatre, Internet, Sport etc.. With the vast majority of our content sourced from local contributors we are always on the lookout for new people to join us and help provide input to this content hungry mag so if you’re keen on writing stuff and getting it published in the mag feel free to drop us a message at content@goguidemagazine.co.uk

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FeedMeNow

NOV 2014 - issue (44)


J M RECORDINGS offers high quality, polished recordings at very reasonable price across ALL genres. Working with full bands, duo’s and solo artists is never a problem and there are special rates for multiple track recordings such as EP’s or Albums. For a quote please email me with your band name as the subject and include how many songs you would like to record, ideal recording dates and any website info. I also offer remixes, mastering and tracking services, please email for a quote. If required, drum tracks are recorded at a location/studio of your choice with bass,guitars and vocals all tracked and mixed at my Edinburgh based home studio.

www.facebook.com/jmrecordings www.soundcloud.com/jm-recordings

www.jmrecordings.co.uk bookings@jmrecordings.co.uk - JM Recordings - Edinburgh - Scotland NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MUSICFEATURE

I

’ve always been a big Gun fan, the Glasgow band of course as opposed to the firearm, saw them a fair few times and they bridged that gap between soft rock and proper heavy rock/soft metal really well, a great sound and one of the best vocalists to come out of Scotland in my lifetime, full of grit and swagger. The King Lot are a band I’m afraid I hadn’t heard a lot about until they sorta bulldozed onto the local music scene this year with some tunes that bands like Gun themselves

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would be proud of, and i’m guessing they’ve head that Gun comparison a fair few times as well. When you listen to The King Lot they too capture the edginess, grit and swagger that Rankin and his crew had (before he left anyway) coupled with the smoothness and pro sound of those transatlantic bands like Bon Jovi etc. It’s a mix that certainly works and shows that throwing three top musicians fro various bands together into a rehearsal room can produced something really quite special, who would have thunk it? Having played in few other bands and worked on various projects before our trio of super smooth rockers got together in June 2013 and settled on a classic three piece lineup of drums, guitar and bass, although you probably wouldn’t know that from NOV 2014 - issue (44)

the massive wall of sound they manage to produce. In their previous personas they managed to achieved a fair bit of commercial success and this has given them a pretty good grounding in the industry and from what I’ve seen they know how to play the music business game which is the point that so many other local bands fail to get past. Individually over the years the guys have pulled off some high profile shows in places like London and New York along with an appearance at T in the Park and sold out shows as support to pretty big American artists and this was, as the band themselves put it, all part of “paying their dues and learning their craft”. So on to this year and The King Lot, well...


www.facebook.com/WeAreTheKingLot NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MUSICFEATURE

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)


2014 has been a busy time with the three piece appearing on bills with many international rock acts like The Answer, Beasto Blanco, The Last Vegas, Vain, H.E.A.T. and Supercharger at the same time stacking up glowing reports on their energetic and powerful live shows. Until My Dying Day is the debut single from the guys and is so far my favourite song from a local band this year, by a big, big margin, sure it’s been a scarce year for local releases, but I’m sure this track would still be up there anyway. It carries a hefty punch and will be standing toe to toe with all the others we’ll be looking at closer to the end of the year. Checkout some of the other tracks available on The King Lot’s various online presences, Soundcloud especially has a nice collection to get your teeth into to give you an idea of exactly what the guys can pull off. ‘The Bang Of A Drum’ is a kick ass rock pop song which has elements you wouldn’t expect that lifts it above what it starts out being, the acoustic ‘Until My Dying Day’ is

just so d*mn good, as bl**dy good as the electric version, no it’s better, no the electric is better, no the acoustic is….. Ahhh F*$k… you get the picture. ‘Until My Dying Day’ is just on the money and has everything you could ask for in a dirty rock tune. ‘Telegram’ again just blasts into your tiny mind like repeated blows with a claw hammer (in a good way of course). ‘As They Burn’ is probably the track that I’m conflicted most by… starting as a really cool dark sounding prog rocky hardcore’esque tune in the mould of INME that quickly returns to the more accustomed cool rock vibe, with a killer chorus as I’m quickly beginning to expect from the guys it flirts with both these styles throughout which is where it messes with my tiny brain a little. A wee change of pace for ‘One Of These Days’ which showcases the rock ballad side to the band, brave to do so early in a bands life, but a song that shows exactly how confident The King Lot are with what they do. A truly great song that is a timely reminder to me just how quickly I’m running out ‘adjectives’ to use in order to get across just how amazing these guys are. Last track on the player as I’m looking at it is ‘Let's

Get Together’ and this track leaves me with the same massive grin on my face as almost all the tracks have, with the acoustic version of Until My Dying Day obviously making me grin in different way, it’s a sleazy laid back affair with a super cool snarling vocal and does nothing more than make want to go back to the beginning and press repeat, which I do… repeatedly. Overall, The King Lot for me are a surprisingly mature and refreshing bunch of dudes who produce some of the best rock music to come out of our wee county in 20 years. I can only look on in wonder at what the guys will do next. In summing up I only have one more adjectives left to sum up The King Lot, well an adverb followed by an adjective to be precise… Amazingly amazing. Keep up with all things The King Lot @ www. thekinglot.com Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MUSICFEATURE THE GOGUIDwE ith INTERVIEW

THE KING LOT

GG: Who are the members and what do they do in the band?

GG: Describe your sound in three words?

TKL: Jason Sweeney/Lead vocals & bass, Michael Fairbairn/ Guitars & vocals, Chris Gillon/Drums & vocals

TKL: Heavy/Melodic/Huge GG: What was the first tune you learned to play as a band?

GG: How did you all meet? TKL: We've been friends for years playing in different bands together

GG: What was the first tune you wrote together? TKL: Jason wrote the majority of the songs then brought them to the band we worked on them together and are currently writing the second album both separately and together now.

GG: How long have you been a band? TKL: Just over a year GG: How did the band name come about, any amazing, heartwarming or uplifting story behind it? TKL: It relates to our home region West Lothian and King Lot was king of Lothian around the time of King Arthur. We wanted something geographical like LA Guns or New York Dolls. Mike came up with it.... he's from Torphichen, Chris is from Fauldhouse and Jason is from Livingston.

GG: What song of yours best sums up the band? TKL: The Bang of A Drum......a huge driving song with huge chorus and pounding rhythm's, we end our set with it and our current Scottish tour is named after it....the Bang The Drum tour. GG: What do you bring to the table that other bands don’t? What makes you stand out? TKL: We bring a fresh modern take on melodic hard rock from the late 80's/early nineties that made us want to play, energy, style, songs and craft add up to one hell of a band!

GG: What names did you reject? TKL: A few that shall never be revealed! GG: Were you in any bands before this one? TKL: Yes...Jason & Mike were in Planet Boom together then Schtick of Rock, Chris was in Stillife then Revolution Babies with Jason and also Rock Gods with Jason. GG: Who are the major influences for the band? TKL: Too many to mention but The Cult/Gun/Foo Fighters/Guns N Roses/The Almighty/Velvet Revolver/The Wildhearts/U2....

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TKL: One from our debut album......One Of These Days i think

GG: Every band hates being pigeon holed... but if you really had to pick a genre what would it be? TKL: Melodic Hard Rock GG: Is there someone you’d like to be compared to? TKL: We have, in less than six months been compared to everyone in the genre so job done there really including one of our favourite bands Gun....we get that all the time.

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MUSICFEATURE

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)


GG: What has been the best gig you played and why? TKL: Hard to say really, supporting US bands Beasto Blanco, Vain & Swedish band HEAT were pretty good but we played MaadHatters in Inverness last week as part of the tour and blew the place up to an amazing reaction. We'll be going back there. Problem is The King Lot don't have bad gigs. GG: Where would you LOVE to play? TKL: We have played a lot of venues both in the UK & US separately from The Barrowlands to Snitch NYC but i think the Whiskey-A-Go-Go in LA or the new Hydro in Glasgow to a partisan crowd have to be goals. GG: So what can an audience expect when they see you play live? TKL: Power, passion and precision plus incredible tunes played to their fullest with the most energy and intensity you have ever seen! GG: ‘Until My Dying Day’ sounds massive, where was it recorded? TKL: It was recorded at SCE Studios in Edinburgh with the rest of the album over 10 days with our Hungarian producer Martin Merenyi whom we flew up from London. GG: In general what do you think of the Scottish music scene just now? TKL: There are a lot of great bands that aren't getting a break. It is tough GG: And what about the local scene????? TKL: There aren't many rock bands in West Lothian but a few have broken through..... more bands are forming and making

music so you can only hope that continues GG: Any local bands that you are into just now? TKL: We like our friends The Amorettes and until recently we really liked a band called Laserfox but they have split recently. That's how it goes really GG: What’s the next big thing happening with the band? TKL: After the tour...album release....then UK tour with a band from LA then world domination! GG: What does the next year hold for you? TKL: next year is going to be huge for us.....lots planned...a lot of festivals, tours, tv appearances, radio campaign's, our own beer Flying Skull (we have tied up with Scottish Brewer DemonBrew.....the lot! GG: What’s the best song you’ve heard in the past 12 months? TKL: Tough one but Desire by The Winery Dogs is the mutts nutts! GG: This was the year of the Independence Vote, Did we make the right decision? TKL: We are a rock band without a political agenda.....we drink beer and don't get involved. Time will tell on that one. GG: Finally is there anyone you'd particularly like to acknowledge for supporting you along the way? TKL: Definitely all our West Lothian supporters from day one including the awesome guys at DreadnoughtRock who have been behind us 100%. The management and staff of 1912 Cafe Bar in Bathgate. Also our manager Fee McKernon, and all of our sponsors.

GoGuide assumes NO rights to any images in this article - All Images are © of the band/original photographer

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MUSICFEATURE

A

utograph Asylum was born in early 2014, not long after the demise of local, and award winning, punk stalwarts The Mystery Girls?’. It had been clear for lost several months, that The Mystery Girls? Had n isio their spark, and drummer Bill Carlyle’s dec n of to leave earlier this year was confirmatio T-Shirt that. We asked the man with the coolest n collection we know, ex TMG bass player Joh Innes, what the story was?

M O C . K O O B E C A WWW.F M U L Y S A H P A /AUTOGR

gig to next to nobody “We had been slogging through gig after t us not being ‘real’ abou s and some of the jibes from other band us, “I think I can told John me,” extre punk were wearing in the the punk scene from on d move had we s, idual say that as indiv their studs and in ed arriv before many of these proto-punks had still evolving and are offs spin punk proper punk hair-dos, the post wide radio play, world had ds, recor good 2 made creating. We had Award, so c Musi nal amazing album reviews, and won a Natio day.” a there was no shame it calling it and Guitarist/Vocalist Following the departure of Carlyle, John and against the but, on Meek decided that they would carry real interest in no had they ds, frien advice of many fans and guys took the the So ? Girls ery Myst The as simply continuing ys had a glut of alwa g havin , opportunity to start with a clean slate dn’t be in short woul itely defin band ideas and riffs, song for a new about the k Mee cted conta at Moff Gary mer supply. New drum ce sessions practi ty opening for a drummer and after a few swea her. “I’m toget well really work it was evident that the band could arsal rehe nd seco the at , teen Velve , song sure we nailed our first larly regu fairly s song and we have been producing good strong ever since”. arsing at Gary’s The name was a group call, they were rehe there, all they had e hom ‘Asylum’ studio at the time and felt at thus ‘Autograph and with… it rate to agree on was what to allite shows to help the key low few a done have AA . Asylum’ was born t album before debu a songs develop and intend to start recording that there is gh thou it has our they start gigging in earnest. Rum school vinyl old r supe on e singl split a do to also tentative plans they don’t but an, 7” with (probably) the top band in West Lothi -shaped! pear goes all it s unles want to name names at this stage What about the AA sound then? and although we “We don’t really want to be pigeon holed has a different style Gary , punk York’ remain rooted in early ‘New s not far away road ent differ down us g drivin is h of playing, whic are still keen We ild. Idlew from acts like The Beta Band, Pixies and enjoy it as le peop that hope and to keep doing our own material 2015”. early in m Albu our for out Look it. ng much as we like creati s and backing vocals, Autograph Asylum are Gary Moffat on Drum Bass. on Innes John and ls, Meek on Guitar and Voca

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)


WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/AUTOGRAPHASYLUM

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MUSICQUIZ

D N I M R E V NE ’S T I S K C O L THE BOL

THE D I U GOG C I S MU QUIZ

NEXTS LINE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Page 14

st tell Mind....’ style ju In classic ‘Never .. s. ng in these so us the next line

Midnight to six man...

ON ANSWERS GE CK PA INSIDE BA

It might seem crazy what I’m about to say... I have climbed the highest mountains... Guess it’s true, I’m not good at a one-night stand...

NEXT LINES

8/8 = Awesome <4 = Pretty Sweet <2 = Pretty Lame >2 = You listen to too much pop music

ALBUM COVERS

6/6 = Awesome <4 = Pretty Sweet <2 = Pretty Lame >2 = You listen to too much pop

Let me take you down... When you try your best but you don’t succeed... She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene... Written in these walls are the stories that I can’t explain... NOV 2014 - issue (44)

NAME THE ALBURM COVE

m really, we’ve re Pretty obvious d an es m na t tis all the telling ar ( l know albums el w e m so om fr re r ge our youn iTunes pics for

ms man Tell us the ambu easy...!!!!


1

2

DE C Z 3

5

E M RS

4

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moved d titles (or CD’s/ eaders)

n...

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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NOV NOV NOV NOV

MUSICWHAT’S ON

FOR LATEST INFO CHECKOUT OUR EVENTS PAGE @ WWW.GOGUIDEMAGAZINE.CO.UK OR THE BAND / VENUE WWW PAGES DIRECTLY

WHAT’S ON IN...

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)


TO HAVE YOUR EVENT INCLUDED IN OUR LISTINGS PAGE JUST INVITE OUR ‘SCOT GOGUIDE’ PAGE ON FACEBOOK TO THE EVENT or MAIL DETAILS TO CONTENT @ GOGUIDEMAGAZINE.CO.UK

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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CHECK ONLINE FOR YOUR AREAS NEXT EVENT

www.facebook.com/pages/Rock-a-Buy-Baby-Kids-Market

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)


CHECK DATES ONLINE

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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L C K O O B THE

LIFE(STYLE)

1

for this mo

B M E V O N R O F S 5BOOK s you 5 awesome reads

GoGuide Magazine bring

2

3

THE BONE CLOCKS / David Mitchell

HOW TO BUILD A GIRL / Caitlin Moran

THE MARTIAN: A Weir

From the author of Cloud Atlas - One drowsy summer’s day in 1984, teenage runaway Holly Sykes encounters a strange woman who offers a small kindness in exchange for ‘asylum’. Decades will pass before Holly understands exactly what sort of asylum the woman was seeking . . .

What do you do in your teenage years when you realise what your parents taught you wasn’t enough? It’s 1990. Johanna Morrigan, 14, has shamed herself so badly on local TV that she decides that there’s no point in being Johanna anymore and reinvents herself as Dolly Wilde – fast-talking, hard-drinking Gothic hero and full-time Lady Sex Adventurer! She will save her poverty stricken Bohemian family by becoming a writer – like Jo in Little Women, or the Brontes - but without the dying young bit. By 16, she’s smoking cigarettes, getting drunk and working for a music paper. She’s writing pornographic letters to rock-stars and eviscerating bands in reviews of 600 words or less.

Mark Watney became one walk on Mars. Now, he’s su person to die there.

The Bone Clocks follows the twists and turns of Holly’s life from a scarred adolescence in Gravesend to old age on Ireland’s Atlantic coast as Europe’s oil supply dries up - a life not so far out of the ordinary, yet punctuated by flashes of precognition, visits from people who emerge from thin air and brief lapses in the laws of reality. For Holly Sykes - daughter, sister, mother, guardian - is also an unwitting player in a murderous feud played out in the shadows and margins of our world, and may prove to be its decisive weapon.

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But what happens when Johanna realises she’s built Dolly with a fatal flaw? Is a box full of records, a wall full of posters and a head full of paperbacks, enough to build a girl after all?

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

Mark finds himself strande with no way to even signal and even if he could get wo would be gone long before Chances are, he won’t have

The damaged machinery, u or plain-old “human error” to kill him first. But Mark is yet. Drawing on his ingenu skills—and a relentless, dog steadfastly confronts one in after the next. Will his reso overcome the impossible o


LUB

onth...

BER

A NOVEL / Andy

of the first people to ure he’ll be the first

ed and completely alone l Earth that he’s alive— ord out, his supplies e a rescue could arrive. e time to starve to death.

unforgiving environment, ” are much more likely sn’t ready to give up uity, his engineering gged refusal to quit—he nsurmountable obstacle ourcefulness be enough to odds against him?

4

5

CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE (THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS) / Cassandra Clare Shadowhunters and demons square off for the final showdown in the spellbinding, seductive conclusion to the #1 New York Times bestselling Mortal Instruments series. Darkness has descended on the Shadowhunter world. Chaos and destruction overwhelm the Nephilim as Clary, Jace, Simon, and their friends band together to fight the greatest evil they have ever faced: Clary’s own brother. Sebastian Morgenstern is on the move, systematically turning Shadowhunter against Shadowhunter. Bearing the Infernal Cup, he transforms Shadowhunters into creatures of nightmare, tearing apart families and lovers as the ranks of his Endarkened army swell. Nothing in this world can defeat Sebastian— if they journey to the realm of demons, they might have a chance… Lives will be lost, love sacrificed, and the world changed.

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

by MikeDixson @ Flickr

THE SILKWORM / Robert Galbraith When novelist Owen Quine goes missing, his wife calls in private detective Cormoran Strike. At first, Mrs. Quine just thinks her husband has gone off by himself for a few days-as he has done before-and she wants Strike to find him and bring him home. But as Strike investigates, it becomes clear that there is more to Quine’s disappearance than his wife realizes. The novelist has just completed a manuscript featuring poisonous pen-portraits of almost everyone he knows. If the novel were to be published, it would ruin lives-meaning that there are a lot of people who might want him silenced. When Quine is found brutally murdered under bizarre circumstances, it becomes a race against time to understand the motivation of a ruthless killer, a killer unlike any Strike has encountered before...

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LIFE(STYLE)FEEDMENOW

FEEDME FEEDMENOW!!! STARTER

Prep time: 10 mins - Cook time: 15/20 mins Serves: 4

Autumn Vegetable Soup with Cheesy Toasts Ingredients: Soup 1 leek, chopped quite small 2 carrots, chopped quite small 1 garlic clove, finely chopped 1 potato, chopped quite small 1 tbsp finely chopped fresh rosemary ½ tsp sugar 410g can chickpeas, drained and rinsed 3 tbsp chopped fresh parsley 2 x 400g cans chopped Italian tomatoes 425ml/ž pint vegetable stock Toast 8 slices of baguette, cut on the diagonal 1 garlic clove, cut in half 50g finely grated Edam

Now lets get down to the nitty gritty... Grab yourself a large saucepan and toss in all of your veg along with the garlic, rosemary, stock and sugar. Season with salt and pepper and stir well, cover and simmer for 15 minutes until the vegetables are tender. Preheat your grill to a high setting. Throw your tomatoes into your food processor or blender and blast until smooth. Add this to the cooked vegetable mixture along with your chickpeas and parsley and again heat through on a simmer, stirring a few times. Rub each slice of bread with the garlic, both sides and pop under the grill toasting one side until a golden brown, turn the bread over and cover with your sliced Edam and grill until bubbling. Serve with a hot bowl of soup.

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)


MAIN COURSE

Prep time: 10 - Cook time: 30 mins Serves: 4

Quick Braised Chicken Ingredients:

Now lets get down to the nitty gritty...

1 large sliced onion 1 tbsp olive oil 1 crushed garlic clove 8 boneless skinless chicken thighs 2 Cox’s/Russet apples, cored and cut into chunks 100g ready-to-eat dried prunes 150ml white wine Some chopped parsley

Stick your heaviest pan on a high heat with the oil and your onions. Stir them and cook for 2 minutes until they start to soften and then add the garlic.

Mash/Veg as desired

Cover with a lid and simmer for about 20 minutes until the chicken is tender but cooked thoroughly. Decorate with some parsley and serve with mashed potato or as desired.

Place the chicken in the pan and cook for a few minutes, turning them until they all have a nice bit of colour on them. Next grab your chopped apples and the prunes and stir them well into the mix, add the wine and bring everything to the boil.

DESERT

Prep time: 15 mins - Cook time: 1 hr Serves: 16 slices

Plum & Almond Crumble Ingredients:

breadcrumbs. Measure out half your mix and pour into a bowl for use later.

250g pack butter (this must be very cold) 225g caster sugar 300g ground almonds 140g plain flour, plus 25g/1oz 2 eggs 1 tsp cinnamon 1 tsp baking powder approx 6 plums, stoned and cut into sixths 50g flaked almonds

Add 140g of your flour to the remaining mix in the processor and again blast until it starts to forms a doughy consistency. Pour the mixture into the prepared tin and press it down with the back of a big spoon. Throw in the oven and bake for 15-20 mins until golden, remove and leave it to cool down for about 10 mins. For the filling pour all but a few teaspoons of the almond mix you set aside back into the processor with the eggs, 25g flour, cinnamon and finally the baking powder and blast until you get a soft batter. Pour it out and spread evenly over the base. Finish by topping with the plum pieces and a little extra caster sugar and cinnamon.

Now lets get down to the nitty gritty... Preheat your oven to 180C. Grab a large baking tin, we’re using a 20 x 30cm one. Butter and line with baking paper. Into a food processor throw the sugar, ground almonds and butter and blast until the mixture looks like chucky

Bake again for a further 20 mins, then sprinkle with the remaining almond mix and the flaked almonds and bake again for another 20 mins or until everything is golden brown. Remove from the oven and leave to cool in the tin. Slice and serve as desired Inspired by recipe from BBC Good Food magazine and @ bbcgoodfood.com

NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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LIFE(STYLE)

PHONE APP CENTRAL

S MONTH S I H T UT CHECKO P 5 BEST TO N BOTH O S P P A D PAID ND iOS N A E E FR ID A ANDRO

TOP 10 FREE APPS

TOP 10 FREE APPS 1 2 3

WhatsApp Messenger WhatsApp Inc. Facebook Messenger Facebook, Inc Facebook Facebook

4

Instagram Instagram, Inc.

5

Snapchat Snapchat, Inc.

1

Facebook Messenge

2

WhatsApp Messenger

3

Facebook

4

Instagram

5

Skype - free IM & video calls

Facebook

WhatsApp Inc

Facebook

Instagram, Inc.

Skype

TOP 10 PAY APPS

TOP 10 PAY APPS

1

Minecraft – Pocket Edition - £4.99 Mojang

1

Minecraft – Pocket Edition - £4.99 Mojang

2

The Chase - £1.49

2

Sleep Cycle alarm clock - £0.69 Northcube AB

3

The Official DVSA Theory Test Kit £4.99 TSO (The Stationery Office)

8

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas 2.49 - Rockstar Games, Inc.

4

Heads Up! - £0.69 Warner Bros.

9

Five Nights at Freddy’s - £1.81

5

LIMBO - £1.49 Playdead

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NOV 2014 - issue (44)

Barnstorm Games

Scott Cawthon

Theory Test UK 2014 - £1.49 Barnstorm Games


LIFE(STYLE)PHONE APPS KILL SHOT - Welcome to your new assignment. You are a covert special ops soldier ready to play your part in dangerous military attacks and silent assassin missions. With access to powerful guns you will rely on your marksman skills to finish the job. Travel deep into enemy territory to locate and eliminate hidden targets. Stare down your rifle scope, zoom in to find and identify the target. Take a breath...and pull the trigger to make the Kill Shot. We need confirmed kills soldier. Good luck out there. HIGH VELOCITY GAMEPLAY - Over 160 first person shooter missions to complete - Awesome 3D graphics - Unforgettable bullet cam kill shot moments - 12 unique maps and stunning locations DEADLY WEAPONS Maximize your firepower with 4 weapon classes: Sniper Rifle / Assault Rifle / Shotgun / SAW Gun - Unlock powerful upgrades for every weapon - 20 different weapons to choose from with more coming soon KILLER POWER-UPS GOOGLE PLAY SUPPORT Kill Shot is rated 17+ and contains frequent/intense realistic violence.

KILL SHOT £FREE Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor

GGG GOAT SIMULATOR : is the latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU. You no longer have to fantasize about being a goat, your dreams have finally come true! Gameplay-wise, Goat Simulator is all about causing as much destruction as you possibly can as a goat. It has been compared to an old-school skating game, except instead of being a skater, you’re a goat, and instead of doing tricks, you wreck stuff. When it comes to goats, not even the sky is the limit, as you can probably just bug through it and crash the game. Disclaimer: Goat Simulator is a completely stupid game and, to be honest, you should probably spend your money on something else, such as a hula hoop, a pile of bricks, or maybe pool your money together with your friends and buy a real goat. Key Features * You can be a goat * Get points for wrecking stuff - brag to your friends that you’re the alpha goat * MILLIONS OF BUGS! We’re only eliminating the crash-bugs, everything else is hilarious and we’re keeping it * In-game physics that spazz out all the time * Seriously look at that goat’s neck * You can be a goat

GOAT SIMULATOR £2.99 Mr Suit for GoGuide Magazine Contributor

GGGG NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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HEALTH&FITNESS

T.O.D. COACHING & Fit inc Studio Gym

HIIT TRAINING Page 26

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FITNESST.O.D.

TCO.AOCH.DING. &

M Y G O I D U T FIT INC. S SECTION GOGUIDE MAGAZINE LY TH ON M ’S M GY IO .D. FIT INC. STUD G AND KEEPING FIT. T.O IN TT GE T T.O.D. COACHING AND OU AB OW P NG YOU NEED TO KN IONING AND BOOTCAM IT ND BRINGS YOU EVERYTHI CO , NG NI AI TR , REGIMES. BEST IN EXERCISE BRING YOU THE VERY LIST EVENT TRAINING IA EC SP D AN TS BI HA D EATING WORKOUTS, DIETS AN

G N I N I A R T HIIT

I

first came across the term ‘Hiit’ (High Intensity Interval Training) several years ago before becoming a personal trainer and began using it as a training tool myself long before applying it as part of training for others. For me it relieved the monotony of running on a treadmill, rowing, or doing any other form of cardio workouts in the gym. It worked on anything. You warm up, you ramp up the speed for the interval times you’ve chosen, job done in half the time. It was a no-brainer and increased my C.V (cardio vascular) fitness quicker and better than steady state cardio did.

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r and Nutritional Coach

Senior Personal Traine

Dorman by JulianaInc Sudio Gym,

@ Fit with TOD COACHING ston Kirkton Campus, Living

WHAT IS HIIT? High-intensity interval training (HIIT) is a form of exercise in which you alternate between very intense anaerobic periods and slower recovery periods for a shorter, more efficient workout. The high intensity intervals should be performed at near maximum effort and the recovery intervals should be done at about 50%. So essentially, if you normally go to the gym, run, swim or cycle, and do your cardio for 1hour, you can cut that time in half and get better results. The exercise should be brief, infrequent, and intense. As the exercises are are performed at a high level of effort, or intensity, it has been shown to stimulate the body to produce an increase in muscular strength and size. HIIT is believed to be superior for strength and size

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BENEFITS OF HIIT TRAINING A recent study compared participants who did steady-state cardio for 30 minutes three times a week to those who did 20 minutes of high-intensity interval training (HIIT) three times per week. Though both groups showed similar weight loss, the HIIT group showed a 2 percent loss in body fat while the steady-state group lost only 0.3 percent. The HIIT group also gained nearly two pounds of muscle, while the steady-state group lost almost a pound! A study in the “Journal of Obesity” showed that 12 weeks of HIIT reduced body fat and increased muscle mass. There were also substantial reductions in total abdominal trunk and visceral (the fat that forms around


your organs) and increases in lean body mass and aerobic power. The most surprising aspect of the results was that the subjects’ diets remained the same. Since fat loss largely takes place in the kitchen and not in the gym, this is one more study touting the powerful effects of highintensity interval training.(Bryant. J. 2014) If you’ve been doing cardio to burn fat it’s worth seeking out your nearest Metafit or Insanity class as excessive aerobic activity can decrease testosterone levels (women have testosterone too, this hormone has a very important role in muscle building) increase cortisol (the stress hormone) production, weaken the immune system, handicap strength gains, and halt any hope of hypertrophy (muscle gain). Think of the physic of the marathon runner and the sprinter, bit of a difference eh? THE SCIENCE BIT When you create an Oxygen Debt your body has burned off all of the blood sugar (glycogen) it has and needs to replace all of that energy. It does this by burning fat. You don’t want to try and burn fat WHILE you are

HIIT High Intensity Interval Training

exercising. You want to burn off CARBS as fuel when you are exercising. Your body has 2 fuel systems, there is Aerobic and Anaerobic. The Aerobic system uses oxygen to burn fuel, and the Anaerobic system doesn’t. But one does not replace the other! What happens is you start out by burning fuel with your Aerobic energy system, and once you go past the point where there is enough oxygen in your system to provide Aerobic energy to your muscles, your Anaerobic system kicks in. To get there, you need to get your heart rate up past what is typically referred to as the ‘Target Heart Rate Zone’

should not be over used. Your body needs time to heal itself after this kind of training, so it is not recommended that you use it more than 4 times (maximum) a week. Other benefits of HIIT • Reduced insulin resistance • Better cardiac function • Faster metabolism • Produces faster gains in endurance levels than steady state cardio • Effective way to recruit/build type 2 Fast Twitch muscle • Can be done anywhere; usually don’t require equipment • Efficient in terms of time commitment • Burns fat more effectively than endurance

The Tabata Protocol: Supra-Aerobic Cardio Was created by Izumi Tabata. If you research the Tabata Protocol online, the original study conducted at the National Institute of Fitness and Sports in Tokyo, Japan used highlytrained endurance athletes in peak physical condition. They would do 8 (or more) intervals, keeping the RPMs on a bike over 85 RPMs until they couldn’t maintain that level of intensity. The original HIIT workout is the Tabata Protocol and requires the following 5 minutes of warm-up 8 intervals of 20 seconds all-out intensity exercise followed by 10 seconds of rest 2 minutes cool-down HOW OFTEN? Just because this training method works it NOV 2014 - issue (44)

Fit Inc Studio Gym offer 2 fantastic HIIT classes; Metafit and Insanity. These are both 30 minute classes and run at the following times: Metafit : Tuesdays 19.00 - 19.30 Insanity - Wednesday 18.15 & Saturday 10.00 PAGE 29


FITNESST.O.D.

TRAIN WITH INTENT

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PAY T.O.D. A VISIT AND SEE WHAT WE CAN DO FOR YOU!

Fit Inc Studio Gym 1 Simpson Parkway Kirkton Campus Livingston EH54 7BH Tel: 01506 413040 www.tod-coaching.co.uk

Team T.O.D/Fit Inc. and one WBO/WBA Champion Mr Nigel Benn

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MOVIES Page 32

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S NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MOVIENEW RELEASES

OCT 2014

Hello Carter

7th November - TBC

Playtime

7th November – TBC

Interstellar

7th November - TBC

Say When

7th November - 15

Set Fire to the Stars 7th November – U

The Case Against 8 7th November - 15

The November Man 7th November - 15

The Possibilities Are Endless 7th November - 12A

The Remaining

7th November – 15

We Are the Giant 7th November – TBC

Nativity 3: Dude, Where’s My Donkey?! 14th November – TBC

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1 20th November – TBC

The Drop

14th November – 15

The Imitation Game

When the Game Stands Tall

The Pact II

Horrible Bosses 2

14th November – TBC 14th November – 15

Third Person

14th November – 15

Get on Up

21st November - 12A

My Old Lady

21st November - 12A

No Good Deed

21st November – 15

The Homesman 21st November – 15

What We Do in the Shadows

21st November – TBC 28th November – 15

I Am Ali

28th November – PG

Men, Women & Children 28th November – 15

Monsters: Dark Continent 28th November – 15

Nina

28th November – TBC

Paddington

28th November – TBC

21st November – TBC

Please check online or with cinema directly for latest information. Page 34

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MOVIE QUIZ

SOME GOOD O

1

LD INVISIBLES FO R YOU THIS MO NAME THE MO NTH VIES PLEASE?

2

3

SEE INSIDE BACK PAGE

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FOR ANSWERS PAGE 35


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MOVIEBOX OFFICE

THIS MON

Gone Girl

(20th Century Fox)

This film unearths the secrets at the heart of a modern marriage. On the occasion of his fifth wedding anniversary, Nick Dunne reports that his beautiful wife, Amy, has gone missing. Nick’s portrait of a blissful union begins to crumble. Soon his lies, deceits and strange behaviour have everyone asking the question: Did Nick Dunne kill his wife?

Dracula Untold (Universal)

Luke Evans (Fast & Furious 6, Immortals) stars in Dracula Untold, the origin story of the man who became Dracula. Gary Shore directs and Michael De Luca produces the epic action-adventure that co-stars Sarah Gadon, Dominic Cooper, and Diarmaid Murtagh. (c) Universal

The Equalizer (Sony Pictures)

McCall is a man who believes he has put his mysterious past behind him and dedicated himself to beginning a new life. But when he meets Teri, a young girl under the control of ultra-violent Russian gangsters, he can’t stand idly by, he has to help her. McCall comes out of his self-imposed retirement and finds his desire for justice reawakened.

G G G G G G G

G G G

The Boxtrolls

G The Boxtrolls, a community of quirky, mischievous creaG tures, have lovingly raised an orphaned human boy named G Eggs in the amazing cavernous home they’ve built beneath the streets of Cheesebridge. When the town’s villain, G (Universal)

Archibald Snatcher, comes up with a plot to get rid of the Boxtrolls, Eggs decides to venture above ground...

What We Did on Our Holiday (Lionsgate)

Doug and Abi are taking their three kids on a trip to Scotland for a big family gathering. They are in the midst of a difficult divorce, and have asked the kids to keep it a secret from their extended family. But as the inevitable feuds kick in, a completely unexpected turn of events involving the children causes further tensions to rise to the surface.

G G G

Information and ratings from combined sources including Page 38

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NTHS UK BOX OFFICE TOP 10 Bang Bang

(20th Century Fox)

A chance encounter of the unassuming bank receptionist Harleen Sahni with the charming yet mysterious Rajveer Nanda, results in an on-rush of ditched planes, car chases, shoot-outs, bombing raids and general mayhem. But as the transcontinental chase ensues with Rajveer convincing Harleen that he’s the good guy, can she really trust him?

Dolphin Tale 2 (Warner Bros)

It has been several years since young Sawyer Nelson and the dedicated team at the Clearwater Marine Hospital, headed by Dr. Clay Haskett, rescued Winter. With the help of Dr. Cameron McCarthy, who developed a unique prosthetic tail for the injured dolphin, they were able to save her life. Yet their fight is not over.

A Walk Among The Tombstones (eOne Films)

Formerly a detective with the NYPD, now a recovering alcoholic haunted by regrets, Matt Scudder has a lot to make up for. When a series of kidnappings targeting the city’s worst drug criminals escalates to grisly murder, the circuit’s ruthless leader convinces Scudder to find the culprits and bring them to bloody justice.

Guardians of the Galaxy (Disney)

Peter Quill finds himself the object of a bounty hunt after stealing a mysterious orb coveted by Ronan, a powerful villain. To evade the persistent Ronan, Quill is forced into an uneasy truce with a quartet of disparate misfits-Rocket, a gun-toting raccoon, Groot, a tree-like humanoid, the deadly and enigmatic Gamora and the Drax the Destroyer.

Pride

(20th Century Fox)

It’s the summer of 1984, Margaret Thatcher is in power and the National Union of Mineworkers is on strike, prompting a London-based group of gay and lesbian activists to raise money to support the strikers’ families. Initially rebuffed by the Union, the groups discover that standing together makes for the strongest union of all. (C) CBS

G G

G G G

G G G

G G G G G G G G

g IMDB, Box Office Mojo, BFI, Film Dates, Google+ NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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MOVIEREVIEWS

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O

h Annabelle, you were one of the scariest parts of The Conjuring. I can’t tell you how excited I was to learn that you were getting your own film. I’m such a huge fan of James Wan, (The Conjuring, Insidious 1 & 2, Dead Silence, Saw) I really think he’s the key to making horror scary again in the 2000’s. He is an absolute master of his craft, and whilst not all of his films are shallow-breathing, pant-wetting, and scared-of-the-dark-again scary he certainly knows how to deliver in terms of lighting, atmosphere, scenery and direction. Oh words can’t describe how happy I was to hear this was coming out… wait, what’s that? James Wan wasn’t the director? That’s fine, at least he was the wri…wait, not the writer either? What was he? The Producer?! So he had little to no creative input into the film? That’s right, James Wan pretty much just paid for the film to be made, and everything else was down to other people. That’s why Annabelle has lost her edge. Don’t get me wrong, ‘Annabelle’ is still the film to see this Halloween (it’s been a pretty poor year for horror in general) but just don’t go into it expecting ‘The Conjuring’ – because it’s not. Now I’m a seasoned horror film veteran and I admit it does take a lot to make me nervous after leaving a screening (I still jump at jump-scares like everyone else) but Annabelle really has lost her spooky-charm. She’s still just as creepy to look at and she’ll make you question every single porcelain/ Victorian doll you’ll ever come across again (although the ‘real’ Annabelle doll was a Raggedy Ann doll), but she’s just not as menacing a presence as she was before.

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The film suffers from a poor story, which makes it hard to get into the film in the first place and let it get under your skin. I can’t help but feel that if a slightly more experienced writer was at the helm, Annabelle could have been so much more. The writer had only previously written B-Movies that were only fit for the Bargain Bin, and now (unfortunately) he’s probably going to get to write many more horror films due to Annabelle’s success. Speaking of Annabelle’s success, this was mostly down to the direction. Annabelle’s director is none other than John R Leonetti, the director of photography of The Conjuring and Dead Silence, the director of Insidious 2, and Mortal Kombat (yes, that Mortal Kombat). He gave Annabelle the atmosphere she needed to begin to unnerve people. Although classic horror tropes were used in the film, they seemed to be given a fresh enough make-over to keep Annabelle from the depths of sequelspin-off hell. However, Annabelle does fall a little flat. It just felt like she wasn’t ready for her own film. Part of her appeal was that she was so mysterious and she was everywhere, then nowhere. But now she feels over-saturated. The runtime is only 99 minutes, pretty short for a modernday film, but I don’t think it would have benefited from any increased screen time; it would have taken what little upper hand the film had away from it. People will flock to see Annabelle based purely off of her reputation from The Conjuring, so regardless of whether or not Annabelle is a good movie, it’ll be a success. However, it does fall short in regards to being a great horror film. It is certainly acceptable, and the choice pick for this Halloween, but other than that I feel it’ll be a film lost to obscurity and will crop up on Netflix for a re-watch or two. In short, go see it, but don’t expect too much. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor

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B

abadook is a film I’ve known about since early last year when trailers for it crept over Indie film websites. I remember thinking that this film had the potential to be absolutely terrifying or complete nonsense. It’s been described as “the most terrifying movie of the year”, so terrifying that it is hard to find in cinemas. But I found one that did screen it and off I went, popcorn in one hand, Slush Puppy inspired beverage in the other and I sat down for what I was hoping was going to be a spooky start to this year’s Halloween festivities. The only thing terrifying about this film is that people think it’s scary. I now understand why very few cinemas are showing this. Three people got up and walked out of the screening I was at (that’s not my style, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little jealous). Needless to say The Babadook is a very slow film. A very slow film. It centres on a young boy and his mother (the father is out of the picture as he died in a car accident driving his pregnant wife to the hospital to give birth). The young boy is obsessed with monsters and has

built many quirky devices to vanquish them, all to his mother’s dismay. You see, this young kid is somewhat…well…weird. He’s clearly a burden to people who are around him and he drives his mother crazy. His obsession with monsters makes him an outcast and he is picked on all the time. He is also a little bit dangerous around other children (purely by accident) due to his homemade monster-killing machines that look like Wylie Coyote drew the blueprints himself. One night the child picks a strange book to be read that night, The Babadook. It soon becomes clear that the book has a menacing message (although that’s obvious to anyone and everyone just by looking at the creepy pictures, which honestly were very impressive and the scariest thing about the whole film) and the mother hides the book away.

is a shame because the run-time was already relatively short for a modern film.

Needless to say weird things start to happen and the child starts acting out a little more at school and at parties, claiming that the Babadook is responsible. Naturally the mother doesn’t listen to a word of it and the weird happenings continue. Eventually she throws the book out, but it returns to her altered. It now shows illustrations of the mother killing the family dog and her child then herself. What unfolds is a tale of mediocrity that had an unsatisfying ending.

There’s also no explanation of what the Babadook is, where it came from, what it wants or what its power is. Some people might like that, but I felt that it wasn’t a mystery so much as it was a cop-out for the writers not being able to think of/ agree on a good enough backstory.

I’ll leave the story part at that so there are no spoilers for anyone who wishes to watch the Babadook themselves. My biggest gripe with the film (other than it’s not scary) is that it was so slow, with so many unnecessary scenes that just made the film drag on, which

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I felt no sympathy for the child in the film, although I appreciate that he was supposed to be a little irritating to the audience, he was beyond caring about. Personally, I’d have happily given him to the Babadook. The Babadook itself was a pretty average antagonist. We never fully see it, which is great because it lets our imaginations run wild. It does have a pretty disturbing presence, but it is surrounded by too many clichés; popping lights, hiding in closets, opening squeaky doors ect. But one unforgivable e thing is when it calls the mother on the phone and says its name. It sounded far too much like the Grudge in both its vocal tone and its delivery and method.

The films lighting and atmosphere was acceptable, there were some satisfyingly dark scenes and some genuinely creepy moments, but it wasn’t enough to save the film. For an indie film it did ok, but it certainly isn’t a contender for the title of Halloween Fright Night Movie. Wait for the Netflix release and go and see Annabelle instead. Victoria Tickle GoGuide Magazine Contributor

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MOVIEREVIEWS

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T

he Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise has its origins back in the 1984 series of comic books based on our four cartilaginous shelled 6ft mutated superheroes and it has been interpreted in a massive collection of guises since, the big screen, TV series, and even a reboot in the 2007 entitled TMNT, with Patrick Stewart. I’ve never been a fan of any and I’m actually a bit surprised that it is getting this outing, although it is rife for motion capture giving the nature of the main characters.

So all they need to do is get some kick ass personalities to play our larger than life collection of reptilians… right? Well despite looking great, as you would expect these days with our awesome CGI houses these days and motion capture now capable of making almost any creature believable, the Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird production falls drastically at the first and most important hurdle… the turtles themselves.

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MOVIEREVIEWS

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Raphael (Alan Ritchson), Michelangelo (Noel Fisher), Leonardo (Pete Ploszek- action/Johnny Knoxville-voice) and Donatello (Jeremy Howard) are all extremely forgettable and bring a worryingly low level of character to their respective roles. Come on guys CGI can’t carry this movie off on its own, especially when it’s supposed to be a quirky comedy at the same time! On this occasion I really do think that these dudes needed a bigger box office roster to pull this off rather than the distinctly B-Movie and TV actors chosen. Megan Fox plays April O’Neil, an aspiring news reporter tasked with the mundane and most trivial tasks with her cameraman Vernon (Will Arnett) in close tow. In a desperate attempt to make it in the business and get to the big stuff she constantly ignores her employer’s advice and seeks out stories of her own. One day she stumbles on a strange robbery being carried out by bad guys the Foot Clan, only this time a shadowy figure stops them in their tracks which doesn’t impress their leader, the evil Shredder (Tohoru Masamune) who demands they are captured them, any way they can. O’Neil finds herself again in the middle of the action when the Foot Clan holds a group of people hostage in the underground in order to flush out and trap our band of vigilante heroes. They do return and foil their dastardly plan but this time O’Neil gets some vital photographic evidence of them in action and trails them to a rooftop where they meet face to face. She discovers their names, that they are turtles, they fight like ninjas, they are teenagers and that they are out to clean up crime in New York City. I’m not sure if it’s a planned course of action but for me the movie jumps into the full on superhero action far too quickly, especially as it has taken them a lifetime to get to where they are today, and is something that is merely brushed over in a few 2 minute scenes mid movie. Perhaps a better approach would have been to start the first movie chronicling their life, their growing, mutating and learning to become the characters they are. Instead we are hurtled headlong into what ultimately becomes a movie that is basically a collection of action sequences that we’ve seen a hundred times before and a story line plucked almost entirely from a Spiderman movie. Maybe it’s a generational thing and a movie that will only really be appreciated by an audience who have grown up with them. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is probably coming to the party a little too late in the superhero reboots as it really offers nothing new to shout about and the franchise hits the screen with a whimper as opposed to a bang with all too familiar action and story lines. Certainly entertaining for the most part but just not doing enough to make it stand out from the crowd, it feels generic, follows the same rigid formula we have seen so often in the superhero genre. The turtle ‘banter’ leaves a lot to be desired, rarely provoked any real laugh out loud moments for me, and most of the comedy is reserved for naff one-liners. Good fun maybe but definitely not breaking any boundaries for originality. Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor

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TV Page 62

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TVREVIEW

O

SERIES 2

ur favourite hapless trio from Leeds are back and they don’t seem to have gained any more life skills since last series. But then again, how many women in their mid-twenties can say they have everything in their life on track?

It’s bad enough working in the same job you had before you went university and having nowhere to live without your parents splitting up. Especially if your dad wants to move in, not with you, but your ex-boyfriend, who you have no choice but to live with. But Meg doesn’t let the trauma go to waste and dumps her feelings on the attractive new neighbour to get, as her cousin Bunny puts it, poked. She may not have been successful in getting into his pants this time but it looks to be a series of deliciously awkward attempts.

Meg, Bunny and Laura return to our screens trying to cope with boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, potential boyfriends while trying to make their money last to the end of the week.

The dialogue isn’t as on fire as the last series which was a slow, awkward pace that suited show and the characters who haven’t quite found their place in life. But keep keeping a

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slower pace does need some clever writing to keep the audience engaged which has been lost for this first episode anyway (some of the clips advertised look promising which makes me hopeful for the rest of the series) What I loved about last series is alive and well for Series Two. I love seeing TV that reflects how Meg’s generation feels in a world that is so uncertain but chooses to roll with punches and laugh about it. Something I both relate and look up to. Becci Wood for GoGuide Magazine Contributor


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TVFEATURE

AMERICAN HoRRoR StoRY

FREAK SHoW Page 66

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B

e prepared to be shocked and terrified this autumn… Freak Show, the fourth season of the awesome American Horror Story, should have hit your screens by now and if you haven’t already tuned in you’re in for a damn freaky treat. Set in 1952 Jupiter, Florida and chronicling the lives, loves, stories and inevitable deaths of one of the last remaining freak shows in America is set to be the most bizarre so far in the AH franchise. Having previously brought us the Murder House back in 2011, Asylum in 2012–13 and Coven last year, Freak Show is shaping up to be the cherry on the cake if the first few episodes are anything to go by. Like previous incantation of the show Freak Show uses a host of the same actors as previous seasons to play the various characters but unlike previous seasons, where it has been stress that they are in no way connected to their previous characters either in the past or future, Freak Show will change that ethos with characters who do actually have splintered connections to other seasons. So far we have discovered that the character of Pepper (Naomi Grossman), who appeared previously in Asylum, which is set in 1964 and thus after Freak Show in the American Horror time line, has returned as the same person alien altered microcephalic woman. It is also mentioned in the show that her Freak Show sidekick Salty, another microcephalic, was in the same orphanage as her. The travelling Freak Show, run by borderline crazy German ex-pat Elsa Mars (Jessica Lange), has pitched its tends and worn out its welcome in its current home and is struggling for its very survival. This thing is freaky by name and freaky by nature but unlike previous shows there seems to be a real human touch showing through and you really do feel yourself connecting with these ‘wonders of the world’. It seems to be setting itself out to be not just about freaks, it’s about people too, sure those people might have lobster hands or 2 heads but they are still people under all that and usually people with a lot more interesting stories to uncover. Elsa‘s collection of misfits find refuge in each other offstage, when the lights die down and the people have all gone we get to see their souls bared before us, they are scared, unloved, paranoid and sometimes angry. They are truly normal people at heart and they will do whatever is necessary to survive. In episode one we discover that all is not well in Jupiter, there is a rather unsavoury character roaming the quiet town, in the form of the most scary assed, creepy, psycho clown I’ve ever had the pleasure to watch on screen, Twisty (John Carroll Lynch) is a retired clown who, unhappy about the Freak Shows arrival in town, decides to make things a little difficult for freak show. Donning a mask at the bottom of his face in an attempt to hide his terrifying disfigured mouth, he is one twisted individual who murders people and kidnaps others, for what we don’t really know yet? And yes he is scarier than IT’s PennyWise. In the episodes released so far he has kidnapped Bonnie Lipton, a local girl he found in a field having a picnic with her boyfriend, her boyfriend becomes Twisty’s first on screen killing. He later takes young boy Corey Bachman hostage, murdering his family along the way. He keeps Lipton and Bachman captive in a creepy old bus which has been abandoned somewhere deep in the woods, he has them locked up in a DIY cage in the back of the bus while he makes unsuccessful attempts to amuse them.

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TVREVIEW

Jimmy Darling: LoBSTER BoY Elsa Mars

Ma Petite

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Pepper

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Tw


wisty

In an attempt to get some items to further amuse his captive audience he decapitates a toy store owner and his clerk, he carries the young clerk’s head with him in his clown props sack. The first character we really meet in the first episode of the show though is Lange’s Elsa Mars as she tries to recruit a recently discovered freak for her failing show. This meeting goes a long way to establish exactly how far Elsa is willing to go to keep her show going, and for her to be nothing less than the star of the show. The freak in question turns out to be Bette and Dot Tattler (Sarah Paulson) two heads that’s share one body from the neck down, well ok some internal organs are not shared but for all intense purposes it is a Two Headed Lady, they will eventually be billed as the Siamese Sisters as their Freak Show persona. They come to light when the Tattler’s milkman, who finds milk lying untouched on the porch, enters the house to see if everything is ok. He finds the girl’s mother dead on the kitchen floor having been repeatedly stabbed, eventually the girls are found upstairs, also stabbed, they are rushed to the hospital where Elsa appears to recruit them. They share a lot but have widely different personalities. Bette is spontaneous ad the dreamer of the two, infatuated with female movie stars of the time. Dot is the more reserved, shielded and passive one who says she is repulsed by the night-time attentions that her sister pays to their shared body pats. They have lived hidden, almost prisoners in their mother’s home and we later find out that it was Bette who killed their mother after an argument with her mother regarding their sheltered existence. The night after Dot stabs her sister, well herself really, with a pair of scissors, presumably racked with guilt over her involvement in her mother’s murder. The process of creating this character are pretty amazing and from the off I found myself simply believing that there was a two headed person on screen, the CGI is that good. Elsa Mars is a German expatriate who is the owner of the Freak Show, 2 months into a 1 year lease on their farmland location, they are struggling and on their last legs when the farmer demands they move on as he has an evangelic preacher man who has paid upfront for their spot. Matters reach a climax when a curfew is put in place for the town after a spate of murders and kidnappings. Elsa has a cold and desperate craving for fame and at the end of episode one we are made aware of her unsettling secret which explains why she has an affiliation with her Freak Show colleagues. Serving as Elsa’s general assistant Ma Petite is a very small Indian woman who is billed as The World’s Smallest Woman and is displayed in a birdcage in the show and is part of the house band where she plays a tiny violin for the musical numbers. She can usually be seen being carried by others in the cast. Lobster Boy Jimmy Darling (Evan Peters) is the son of the Freak Show’s Ethel Darling and suffers from Ectrodactyly, which basically is the deficiency or absence of one or more central digits of the hand or foot. Jimmy has a deep hatred for those who view him and his friends as nothing more than freaks, he cares for every one of those people they mock and is a truly loyal friend to those close to him and will defend them with any chance he gets. It is shown in the past that Jimmy has been exploited throughout his short life due to his deformities, his father even having his birth put on display for people to come watch a “freak” being born. His father we later find out is Dell Toledo, the new strongman act who tries to take over the running of the freak show from Elsa. Jimmy saves the twins from arrest in episode one by slitting the throat of a detective who has come to arrest them. The freak family later chop up the body and bury it in the woods, secretly watched by scary clown Twisty.

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Strongman

Meep

Salty

Miss Mystic Esmeralda

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Gloria Mott

Bette and Dot Tattler: NOV 2014 - issue (44) THE Siamese Sisters


a

He also has a side job where he uses his hand deformities to help sexually satisfy frustrated local women. Jimmy’s mother is Ethel Darling (Kathy Bates), The Bearded Woman who, for all intent purposes, seems pretty normal, short and plump, with a thick Baltimore accent… too thick sometimes as I can’t make out what she’s saying half the time. Apart from her beard there isn’t anything that really stands out as freaky about her. A stubborn and respected woman, she is Elsa’s second in command and stands up for herself, Elsa and the others when needed. Her maternal instincts are strong and will stop at nothing to try to protect her son. Ethel’s ex-husband Wendell ‘Dell’ Toledo (Michael Chiklis) is a Strongman who appears in episode 2 and proceeds to take over the place. He is accompanied by his hermaphroditic ‘three breasts and a ding-a-ling’ wife Desiree Dupree (Angela Bassett) having just left their previous engagement with the The Giuseppe Brothers due to him bumping off a young man he catches being intimate with wife. He joins the Freak Show as a barker and chief of security and ruffles everyone’s feathers when he arranged matinee shows to get around the town curfew. He also sets up Meep after Jimmy tries to frame him for the detective’s murder.

Edward Mordrake

Meep is a tiny geek with just one work to say, Meep! He also has only one talent and that is to bite the heads off of small living animals. When Jimmy tries to frame his estranged father by planting the cops badge in his trailer, thing backfire and the strongman flips the blame on to Meep. He is arrested and left overnight in a holding cell with several lowlifes who blame him for the string of murders and beat him to death. At the end of episode two Meep is dropped off at the camp bundled in an old tarpaulin. Gloria Mott (Frances Conroy) is a wealthy woman who in episode one buys every seat at the show one night so her spoilt psychopathic son could see it. Her son is infatuated with Bette and Dot and initially wants to join the troupe, she unsuccessfully tries to buy the twins for him for £15,000. In episode two she also meets a walking Twisty the clown by roadside one day, she hires him for her son’s birthday party. Her crazy son Dandy Mott meets Twisty at his party, only the two of them were there so not really a party, eventually Twisty knocks him out and runs away. Dandy becomes infatuated by the clown and becomes the serial killers protégé after helping stop his captives escaping from the bus. In episode three he makes his own clown suit and threatens to kill his maid before the episode ends with him tormenting Twisty’s captives. Twisty interrupts any fun by returning with new captive Mike.

Ethel Darling: The Bearded Woman Stanley

Dr. Sylvester Mansfield, real name Stanley and his assistant Miss Rothschild appear in episode three, a pair of con-artist they plan to capture and kill members of the show to sell on to a collector. Miss Rothschild poses as Miss Mystic Esmeralda and joins the Freak Show as their fortune teller in order to get ‘in with’ the freaks while Stanley later arrives on the scene as Richard Spencer, a Hollywood talent scout and focuses his attentions on leading lady Elsa. Episodes 3 and 4 are connected through the one and only Edward Mordrake (Wes Bentley), the subject of freak show folklore come to life in search of his latest victim, spirited away to the land of the dead after he recounts the horrors of their past lives. This is an opportunity to set the background stories for most of the cast eventually ending in one of them leaving us…. We won’t tell you who and we’ll leave our feature here with lots more FREAKINESS to come… Mr Suit GoGuide Magazine Contributor

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DVD Page 72

Image Š surprise truck @ flickr

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DVDTOP10

1

THE FAULT IN OUR STARS (20TH CENTURY FOX HE)

2

MRS BROWN’S BOYS - D’MOVIE (UNIVERSAL PICTURES)

3

FROZEN (WALT DISNEY)

4

MALEFICENT (WALT DISNEY)

5

GODZILLA (2014) (WARNER HOME VIDEO)

THIS MONTHS DVD TOP 10

6

THE HOBBIT - THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG (WARNER HOME VIDEO)

7

THE SNOW QUEEN (SIGNATURE ENTERTAINMENT)

8

VIKINGS - THE COMPLETE SECOND SEASON (MGM)

9

SLEEPING BEAUTY (WALT DISNEY)

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THE OTHER WOMAN (20TH CENTURY FOX HE)


TH...

OUT NOW AND THIS MON

new dvds

EO SHOP’ ID ‘V L A C O L AT YOUR

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DVDREVIEWS levelled Chicago everyone thinks that all our Transforming buddies are the bad guys. This prompts the CIA to create a special unit with the sole purpose of hunting down every one of them. Cade Yeager (Wahlberg) is a robotics expert trying to make ends meet doing various odd jobs and picking up broken or old stuff in the hope of turning it into gold, when he discovers a beat up old truck at a job he strikes a deal with the owner and back in his barn he dreams of it being a Transformer and his ticket to a big pay day if he can get it back to working condition, little does he know that this is none other than Optimus Prime. Soon our mild manned father becomes an all-out action hero and the uniqueness of his particular situation and skill set are left by the wayside and the Transformers action machine rolls into action and doesn’t really stop until the titles roll. All told an enjoyable outing though and the best since the 2007 original reboot.

L

ike a lot of people I’ve never really been a fan of the Transformers movies, like TMNT I think it’s a generational thing. I’m sure I’ve seen them all and other than knowing that it’s about cars and trucks turning into big robots I couldn’t really tell you the main story line of any of the movies. Despite a large chunk of people’s indifference to the franchise, including mine, it hasn’t stopped the movies being massively successful, the last one raking in over one billion dollars worldwide.

Strangely the latest Michael Bay CGI action spectacle Transformers: Age of Extinction is pretty OK, in fact I’d say I pretty much enjoyed it to be honest and the addition of Mark Walberg as the main focus goes a long way to adding a little something that was maybe missing from the movies. The diehard fans will almost certainly love it as it’s pretty much more of the same, the haters will still hate for exactly the same reasons but for us stuck in the middle it is one of the best so if you’re looking for something to while away a cold winter afternoon then don’t hesitate to choose some mechanical mayhem. It’s worth it just for the techy dinosaurs. Overall the ratings for all the movies have been pretty low when you checkout places like IMDB and Rotten Tomatoes, with none of them other than the original TRANSFORMERS back in 2007 getting anything close to a respectable number, while the taking still manage to climb and thus the new movies trundle on. As expected these days the latest movie is spectacular, with everything looking slick and believable with tonnes of action and destruction to keep everyone happy. Those areas aren’t where the movie falls down, like TMNT 2014 it’s in the characters, or the lack of them. Sure Wahlberg does an admirable job at playing the struggling single father trying hard to raise his daughter who is quickly becoming a woman. But that’s about it, the remaining cast members are pretty non-descript, but it’s an all action movie so it only just gets away with it. After the battle between the Autobots and Decepticons that

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DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS takes under his wing in order to save their sorry asses. Single mom Eva (Carmen Ejogo) and her pig-headed daughter Cali (Zoë Soul) join Leo after he rescues them from a gang who dragged them from their home for god knows what. Leaving Shane (Zach Gilford) and Liz (Kiele Sanchez) bringing up the rear, a couple whose car break down in the wrong place at the wrong time. Leo is the only one with any chance of survival but he agrees to take them to a safe house in return for a car so he can continue his own journey of salvation. Needless to say things don’t go to plan and we get to meet a few of the people taking The Purge a little too seriously. A good watch but lacking a little of the edgy, horror charm, of the original.

T

he original Purge was a low key release that I really enjoyed, it had its faults but don’t all low budget movies? With pretty good success at the box office it was inevitable that things wouldn’t stop there. It was just too good an idea to let it go. Now almost a year and a half later the follow up is about to hit our DVD shelves.

The Purge: Anarchy has kicked the tenseness of the one home fighting for survival scenario and opted for kicking Ethan Hawke, the main protagonist of the first movie, into touch and opting for a more open and action packed offering. Same core idea remains just a lot bigger, and a lot less tense, which is a bad thing. For me a lot of the edge is lost from the initial movie and things are made to feel a lot more like every other apocalyptic survival movie out there. The makers don’t seem to have learned from the likes of Saw and Final Destination… great ideas, played out with different cast but still retaining the same identity throughout. Anarchy seems to be losing its unique identity already. As before The Purge is an annual event which allows normal society to have one night of lawless mayhem where anyone can do almost anything in the name of The Purge, to destroy, to rob and to kill, to rid society of those who drain its resources whether they be the old, sick, criminal or just normal everyday people, it’s a free for all. Those who do not wish to take part in the proceedings and stay safe barricade themselves into their homes and wait out the long night to end. I’m not saying that the second film is not entertaining because it is, better than most, just not the same. It’s lost its innocence I suppose and feels more like a movie with a big bank book and a small book of ideas, now relying on bigger sets, bigger weapons and bigger explosions. Anarchy’s story pits gun-wielding loner Leo (Frank Grillo) who is out for revenge on someone we discover at the end of the movie so I won’t spoil it, teams up with four strangers he meets and

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riter/Director John Carney’s ‘Once’ is a little film that you really need to cherish; it’s about a guy, it’s about a girl, it’s delicate and it’s touching underneath its brash Dublin exterior. The story becomes the turning point in two strangers bumbling lives when they briefly meet over a short period of time. Musician Glen Handard (of the Irish band the Frames) plays the guy, a bearded Dublin street musician lost in his messed up existence. 19-year-old singer-songwriter Markéta Irglová plays the girl, a Czech pianist, who approaches the guy one day when he’s out busking. She asks why he only plays edgy, heartfelt songs at night? He tells her that he makes his money from random passers-by during the day; they only want to hear popular songs, the ones they know. She also learns that he works for his father in a vacuum cleaner repair shop, she has a broken vacuum which she brings to him the next day and their friendship begins. She plays piano but doesn’t have her own one so she convinces a local shop owner to let her use the ones in his store when it is close for lunch. She takes him along one day and they play together. They are both wary and wounded souls, her husband is still back in the Czech Republic so she lives with her mother and daughter in a small flat. He is trying to get over a breakup from his girlfriend who lives in London. They decide to work on some songs together and over time you feel their strange relationship grow to one that is not just a creative one, it is emotional as well. She is a strong character though and throughout you are pretty sure that the only things romantic between them will be in the lyrics of the songs. Eventually they recruit a band of street musicians and they record the guys demo… where do they go from there? We never do get to know their names, and to be honest I never noticed until I wrote this review and I’ve seen it 3 times...

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ctor turned Writer/Director John Carney created Dublin film ‘Once’ for $150,000 back in 2006 which is one of the most truly great and honest music movies that you could see, it has won an Oscar for Best Song and is now a massively successful stage show. Begin Again is Carney’s new foray into the music themed movies and to be fair it never really cuts through the inevitable Hollywood glitz and glamour to be anything really meaningful in the way Once does. With all its slick cinematography, city streets backdrops and night time skylines it just doesn’t have the ability pull at those same heartstrings, it feel too squeaky clean and has too much going on to really connect properly with the main characters. It’s not to say that Begin Again is a bad move, it is absolutely not and has an awful lot going for it with a really interesting moral platform running throughout. It’s just a case of less is more for me and it could have been just so much closer to perfection if treated it the same way as Once. The movie stars Keira Knightley as Gretta, who along with longtime boyfriend Dave (Adam Levine) are song writing partners who decamp for New York when he lands a deal with a major label. As you might expect the trappings of his new-found fame soon tempt Dave to wander which leaves our heroine Gretta on her own. While performing on an East Village stage she is discovered by Dan (Mark Ruffalo), a disgraced record-label exec, who is immediately captivated by her raw talent. He convinces her to record an album with him using the sounds of the city as their backdrop ad inspiration. Shot around New York City much of Begin Again is rumoured to have been improvised and shot quickly on the various street locations. It does have a kind of an excitingly ‘real-time’ feel about it. The music is pretty good too…

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DVD/BLU-RAY REVIEWS MYMHM ? MOVIE

I

n 1980, at the age of just 23, Ian Curtis, frontman of Manchester band Joy Division, killed himself, from then on the mystique of the band exploded beyond all proportion.

Almost every aspect of them became poignant and tinged with a heady sadness, an eerie sadness that was definitely already there before Ian took his own life, but now suddenly it is all staring you in the face. The album covers, the graphics and of course the lyrics, littered with loneliness, darkness and desperation. Control’s Writer/Director Anton Corbijn was a photographer close to the band at this time and captured their most desolate final days in Manchester. He bases Control mainly on Curtis’s widow Deborah’s 1996 memoir ‘Touching From a Distance’. Shot in black and white the movie has a morbidness about it that adds a lot to the overall feel. Focusing as you’d expect on Curtis (Sam Riley), his band, his physical issues, his mental issues and his relationship with his wife (Samantha Morton). When we first meet him he is a pale, working-class loner into glam rock, who too easily slips into the normal working man’s lifestyle; boring job, wife, kid, terraced house. When he later decided to become the frontman of local band Warsaw, after he and his band mates see the Sex Pistols at one of their now iconic Manchester Trade Hall shows, things take a more destructive and troubled. Factually the movie telling of the band forming isn’t quite right but we’ll allow for a little artistic integrity. Curtis is shown as a savant type poet who struggles to cope with his issues, more often than not adding to them with the darker elements of his character. As the success of his band escalates, now rechristened Joy Division after the prostitution wing of a Nazi concentration camps mentioned in the 1955 novel House of Dolls, life becomes even harder for Ian, coping seems to be out of his reach and things escalate when his epileptic fits kick in. The movie pushes us towards a conclusion that the real motive for Curtis killing himself due to his inabilities to separate his life as a husband with his flourishing rock icon status and all that comes with it, including his affair with Belgian photographer Annick Honoré (Alexandra Maria Lara). I’m not so sure…

YOU MIG

HT HAV

E MISSE

I

know we probably don’t need to mention that Mr Jared Leto has two jobs, he’s a pretty cool method style actor on one hand, think Fight Club, Chapter 27 etc. and on the other hand he’s the frontman of multimillion album selling band ‘Thirty Seconds To Mars’. It’s not a Leto movie we’re reviewing here, nor a TSFM DVD, well it is I suppose, it’s actually a both of both. Artifact is a proper award-winning documentary following the bands time recording their third album ‘This Is War’, and in the process revealing their intimate and drastic struggles with their record label VIRGIN/EMI, a battle that culminates in a 30 million dollar law suit against them for breach of contract. The band had produced their first 2 albums over the course of 1999 – 2008, the first album, 30 Seconds to Mars released in 2002, and the second, A Beautiful Lie, in 2005. In 2008 Leto and the band decided that they wanted to renegotiate their contract with VIRGIN/EMI or even to move on to pastures new. As they lived in California, and signed their deal in California, they wanted to use a Californian state law that rules that no one can be held to a contract of more than 7 years, as they were now 9 years into their deal they wanted things to change. Virgin/EMI had different ideas as the contract (like most music contracts) is geared around a set qty of albums. In TSFM case that was 5, they had only delivered 2 in their 9 year spell so owed their label another 3. That’s the simple black and white of it… but as with most things there is a lot of grey areas to think about. Leto spends the movie opening up his life to the cameras as they attempt to record the album whilst enduring months of intense pressures and the struggles his band must face as they begin to question their art, money and integrity. It is a must watch movie for anyone interested in music as the behind the scenes goings on of a major record company are quite astounding. It’s crazy to think that by the time TSFM get to album 3 they are $2.7 million in debt to their record company and hadn’t been paid $1 from their 6 million worldwide album sales…

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GAMES Page 80

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GAMING CHARTS

0 1 P O T E H TBOX-OFFICE GAMES FOR C P D N A X O B X , N O I T A T S Y PLA

PS4

PS3

XBOX

2 FIFA 15 3 DESTINY

2 FIFA 15 3 WWE 2K15

2 FIFA 15 3 SUNSET OVER

4 ALIEN: ISOLATION

4 DISNEY INFINITY 2.0

4 FORZA HORIZ

5 MINECRAFT: PLAYSTATION EDITION 6 MIDDLE EARTH: SHADOW OF MORDOR 7 THE EVIL WITHIN

5 SKYLANDERS TRAP TEAM

5 ALIEN: ISOLA

6 ALIEN: ISOLATION

6 THE EVIL WIT

7 GRAND THEFT AUTO V

8 DRIVECLUB

8 THE EVIL WITHIN

7 ASSASSIN’S C FLAG 8 DESTINY

9 WATCH DOGS

9 CALL OF DUTY: GHOSTS

10 LORDS OF THE FALLEN

10 DESTINY

1 CALL OF DUTY: ADVANCED WARFARE

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1 CALL OF DUTY: ADVANCED WARFARE

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1 CALL OF DUT WARFARE

9 MIDDLE EART OF MORDOR 10 TITANFALL


XONE

TY: ADVANCED

XBOX360

1 CALL OF DUTY: ADVANCED WARFARE

PC

1 FOOTBALL MANAGER 2015

2 THE SIMS 4

RDRIVE

2 FIFA 15 3 WWE 2K15

ZON 2

4 DISNEY INFINITY 2.0

3 CALL OF DUTY: ADVANCED WARFARE 4 FARMING SIMULATOR 15

ATION

5 SKYLANDERS TRAP TEAM

5 ALIEN: ISOLATION

THIN

6 FORZA HORIZON 2

CREED IV: BLACK

7 ALIEN: ISOLATION

6 CIVILIZATION: BEYOND EARTH 7 MIDDLE EARTH: SHADOW OF MORDOR MONOLITH 8 THE EVIL WITHIN

TH: SHADOW R

8 BORDERLANDS: THE PRESEQUEL! 9 GRAND THEFT AUTO V 10 DESTINY

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GAMING REVIEW

I

magine a game, blending the styles of Assassin’s Creed and the Batman: Arkham series and placed in the world of The Lord of the Rings. That to me sounds like one of the greatest games to ever be created. Shadow of Mordor takes place before the events of The Lord of the Rings and after the events of The Hobbit, when Sauron is rebuilding his armies for another march on Middle-Earth. You take control of a ranger named Talion, whose family is murdered and Talion himself is sacrificed by the Black Hand, one of Sauron’s highest-ranking Captain’s. This ritual performed on Talion resurrects the spirit of Celebrimbor, the Elf responsible for creating the rings of power and the One Ring. Using this opportunity, Celebrimbor uses his wraith abilities to resurrect and use Talion so the two can seek revenge on the Black Hand and Sauron. Got it ? This all takes place on the lands of Udun, which is the part of Mordor that we see in the films, and the sea of Numen, a lusher and sunnier side to the evil realm. The map isn’t particularly massive compared to the likes of Assassin’s Creed or Batman, there are no villages or towns to stop by at and pretty much anything you come across in Mordor either want’s to kill or is shackled in chains. You can’t really make your way anywhere in Mordor without getting the attention a few Orcs or Uruks, so be ready for a fight at any time. Luckily though the combat in the game is fantastic, fans of the Arkham series will be right at home with the controls as Shadow of Mordor practically duplicates them with their own LotR twist added to it. Specifically with the button layouts as you have triangle to counter, square and circle to instantly take down an enemy etc. all have the same feeling as the Arkham games. So you really get a sense that you’re a bad ass Orc slaying beast when your combat chain is high and there’s Uruk bodies lying everywhere. That’s just when the cockiness will kick your ass because before you know it you’ll be surrounded by Orcs some of which will attack you at range, some will counter your attacks from the front and others can only be hit from

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behind, all adding up to sometimes being a bit overwhelming at times especially if a captain also joins the fray. If you’re skilled enough though managing to slay all the Orcs and surviving the fight is one satisfying feeling. Despite some awkward camera angles whenever a battle ventures to close to a wall. Your main hard work will come from taking down the 20 Uruk Captains that are shown in your menu screen, along with the other 5 leading Warchiefs to whom they protect. These orcs themselves are interesting character on their own as some have their own nicknames that define them and their own strength and weaknesses. The hierarchy of the captains will change due to certain events, where some captains fight each other to gain a higher spot, some can get promoted and get stronger for killing Talion and some just to fill in the missing spots since you killed the previous captain. What makes this interesting is that potentially any Uruk can become a captain, just for landing the killing blow on you in combat. And what’s even more interesting is how most captains are so much different than one another, not just by their looks but by their personality. Each captain has strengths and weaknesses which are very valuable to know. You can take your time and scout for an Uruk that knows information I order to gain some intelligence about the captains and that way you can find out the best approach to bump off a certain captain, maybe an instantly stealth execution or that they can’t be hurt from range attacks. You can always chose not to search out info and run blindly into fights and find out the hard

way that a captain can’t be hurt with special attacks or he has strong bodyguards around him. You can take out captains by finding them on the map or by running into one of them accidently. There are also events such as power struggles where two captains will be present for you to takedown. Warchiefs on the other hand can only be killed through the progression of the story and require a bit more effort to bring out. Talion only has 3 weapons in his arsenal: a sword, a bow, in which Celebrimbor manifests over Talion for use, and a broken sword which acts as a dagger that can only be used while in stealth. One of them is automatically equipped based on how Talion is being controlled. Each weapon can be upgraded with the use of a rune. Runes can be collected from slaying captains or Warchiefs, and then you can add them to your weapons which could give you an edge in dealing with damage or gaining health back and many other perks. You will have to buy Rune slots to add more than one on your weapon by using points you collect from killing enemies. You can also add new combat and wraithlike abilities to Talion after levelling up which give you the edge while in battle and even ‘dominate’ Caragors, a large Warglike creature that you can tame and ride to get across the map quickly and tear apart enemies with. Eventually you can even tame Graugs, a gigantic tusked troll which just decimates anything it comes across. Soon you’ll be able to ‘dominate’ Uruks and captains to your will and even make them become Warchiefs. Even though most of Mordor is a decimated wasteland the

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game still looks brilliant and is rather quite beautiful. Here comes the most disappointing part of the game… which is surprising, because it’s the story. It starts off pretty good, it’s violent and dark, but the lack of any interesting characters and actual story missions is something that will definitely hurt this games enjoyment for a lot of people. Talion himself is an uninteresting character and so is anyone else he meets for that matter, even Gollum’s role in the game is quite questionable. The only character that I actually liked was Celebrimbor. He seemed like an interesting addition with a tragic back story which should have played more into the story than it did. The lack of any proper story based missions is noticeable and at times it seemed like the developers just gave up on a story or maybe they just wanted a quicker finish to the game? It completely ruined the ending anyhow. If you were expecting a massive story worthy of Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings epic’ness then you’re going to be extremely disappointed. If you enjoy the gameplay of Assassin’s Creed and the Batman Arkham series then you’ll enjoy the open-world stealth and combat aspects. Mordor feels and looks alive and treacherous with an enemy army that is always evolving, it may not give you an epic story, but it might just fulfil your craving for orc slaying. Probably one of the better games that has been released so far in 2014 and even if you don’t like the lack of a real story (like myself) you’ll still have a blast playing it. Sam Sheppard GoGuide Magazine Games Contributor

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T

he Developer Creative Assembly, most famous for their strategic Total War games, knew what to do with the Alien franchise and it’s no surprise to know they have done an excellent job of pointing the genre in the right direction with Alien: Isolation.

The game successfully captures what many other developers have failed to do; by making the main draw of the game, the alien, both terrifying and truly threatening. They also got the environment perfect, everything is just beautiful as you make your Page 94

way through the corridors of the ship with some of the best lighting I’ve seen in a game. It all comes together to add that something extra that just immerses you completely in the game. You play as Amanda Ripley, the daughter of Ellen Ripley and an engineer by trade. It’s been 15 years since her mother has went missing, Amanda goes along with an expedition to a space station called Svastopol mainly to find the flight record of the Nostromo in hopes it will offer any information of her mother’s whereabouts. Obviously some complications arise during her visit. The tension build up at start of the game was pretty much perfect; with the dark corridors, loud and strange noises and the

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talk of something on board killing people was brilliant, the only small issue I had with it was that it was maybe a tad long before you actually come across the Xenomorph, and it probably could have been revealed in a better way as well, but that’s probably nit picking. But when the Alien is revealed, that’s when the fear truly kicks in, especially during the early section which is where the alien is more effective. You can’t outrun it, you can’t kill it and it will instantly kill you once it spots you. So you’ll be spending a lot of your time hiding under your desks and in lockers. One of the major annoyances with this game and in fact a lot of stealth games is that you have to crouch to be sneaky, please stop this because it’s untrue.


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The only other main issue I have with Alien Isolation is the pace of the gameplay combined with the save spots. This is a stealth game and you do have to move slowly to stay hidden for long periods of time and sometimes getting through some areas can take a while, so it’s frustrating (to me) when you die knowing that your last save was miles away and you now have to do that entire section over again. I’m not against sparse save spots or annoyed that there’s no autosave just that the pace of the gameplay isn’t fast enough for one like me to enjoy having to redo a section that can take up a lot of your game playing time. It’s the most basic way to make a game feel longer than it is. The ‘crafting’ system in the game is a great feature, and one that really comes in handy although I didn’t use it as much as I should have during the early sections. Items can be made once you have collected their blueprints and the specific components needed. Some items share certain components so if you create a smoke bomb you won’t be able to create a health kit until you find more parts. Searching for blueprint adds nicely to the exploration of the station. The most essential tool you’ll come across is the motion tracker. This will be your best friend throughout the game and potentially your downfall. Every time you hear that bleep of the tracker it usually means hit the deck and hide, and it’s not a good idea to pull it out when the Xeno is nearby as the

noise the tracker makes will attract the Alien, so it’s probably a good idea to just peek around the corner instead. After a lot of running and hiding and no doubt dying due to the Xeno, you’ll eventually collect the flamethrower. Now you have an escape plan if the Alien spots you, a few burst of flamethrower will send the Xeno fleeing in a screeching panic. It almost feels like the shoe is on the other foot for a bit, but don’t get to trigger happy as this still won’t kill the Alien. Other than the Alien trying to rip you apart, there are androids that will also try and kill you. Unlike the Alien the good thing is that you have a fighting chance against them. At first glance the android are as terrifying as old dolls, with their plain white emotionless faces and glowing red eyes. When you first come across them you immediately know ‘these things are going to mess me up’ but as terrifying as they look they are used in a particularly menacing way, mainly because they don’t run or sprint after you. Since you can at least destroy them, it would have made more sense (and be a lot more horrifying) if they could rush after you. Plus they usually appear in groups so having 2 – 4 androids sprinting at you would of changed the pace of the game perfectly. You can sneak past the androids, and it’s good to know is that you have a fighting chance if you get spotted, especially towards the end of the game when Amanda has

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collected more capable equipment. It’s just a shame that the androids almost feel like a wasted effort. The game will also jump to cut scenes which actually look worse than the in game graphics, with atrocious lip syncing. It’s as if they didn’t even bother to try match up the lips to the voice acting. Survivor Mode filters the best part of Alien: Isolation and places you in an area which you have to escape from as quickly as you can while still trying to avoid the Alien. The quicker you get out, the higher the score will be on the leader boards, completing optional objectives in these areas will also increase your score. The bad thing about these short levels is that, proven by the leader boards themselves, this can usually be done in mere minutes and so far there is only the one challenge. So unfortunately at this time there’s not much to do after completing the game. If you’ve been waiting for a good Alien game then Alien: Isolation is definitely worth playing. Hiding from the Xeno is always thrilling and visually stunning in every way. Things can very quickly get frustrating and potentially begin to drag on too long but what Creative Assembly has achieved with Isolation is potentially that the next Alien game they make (which they should) could very well be a great Alien game. Sam Sheppard GoGuide Magazine Games Contributor

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A

nother year and another NBA 2K game and it looks better than ever. On PS4 this is the game that you’ll show people and say “look… just look at how real games can look these days” and people will go… “Aw yeah, that looks real” or “OMG! That’s amazing!” And so far, this is all that 2K15 has to offer… I never played NBA 2K14 when it first came out so I don’t know if I missed all the patches that might have been made after it first came out, but wow 2K15 is in desperate need one… immediately. There are two massive issues I have with this game, and that is the animations and the passing. Don’t get me wrong, the animations look good and lifelike but there’s a thing where your player will get stuck within an animation and it’s the most annoying thing ever. Seriously, it’s so bad, the amount of times it can happen and the consequences of it can effect your team badly. I’ve seen so many issues where animations have flopped and caused crappy things to happen. I could take another 3 pages to mention them all. I’ve seen players jumping for a rebound and missing the ball, going for a loose ball and failing to pick it up, running out-of-bounds for no reason, passing the ball but really they just throw it straight at the other player guarding him, taking 5 steps forward just to try and hit the ball out of someone’s hand that is an inch in front of them, jumping late, I could go on forever with this. Really I could, the animations ruin this game. The passing has had a visual improvement, where an arrow now appears under the player your controlling pointing in the direction your analogue stick in pointing. This does nothing to improve the passing… if anything it has made it more frustrating because I now know for certain that I was pointing at Labron, who was open, and instead the game decided to pass to Irving, who had two people guarding him and it cost me a turnover!

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I’m just saying, that this game can, and will frustrate you whenever possible. I would also like to point out though, that this game can be fun to play when everything works accordingly; when there are no animation issues and your passing isn’t getting messed up, the game is a really good, and especially good looking, basketball game. 2K has brought some old features back the franchise and introduced some new things too. Mascots and Cheerleaders make a return but are merely cosmetic, apart from the cheerleaders who get a bit of screen time at the start of a game and at half time etc. The players in the starting line-up get introduced as well as one of the main new features to the game, the pre-game show hosted by Ernie Johnson and Shaquille O’Neal. The two discuss upcoming games that you are about to play and have some lively back and forth banter. They rarely repeat themselves and you can feel the onscreen chemistry between the too, so it’s a great way to get you more immersed. Face-scan Technology is also another new feature that is utilized if you have the PlayStation camera and lets you put your own face into the game for your created player. You may not get the best looking, or maybe even get some horrifying looking results, but after a few tries you may actually get a reasonable representation of yourself into the game! MyPlayer returns again this year with some new improvements. NBA players are now fully voiced, although their attempts at a voiceover are laughable but it’s a step up from reading a bunch of text that appeared Page 102

previously. What MyPlayer still suffers from is how bad your rookie is at basketball, I know you’re meant to improve your player over time but your player can hardly score when he’s directly underneath the basket! To be fair though, it isn’t as bad as it was in NBA 2K14. What has been drastically improved though is increasing your player’s attributes. Before you had to increase each and every individual attribute but now they all fall under six different categories of skills such as; Athleticism, Defence and Playmaker. Making it a lot easier for you to increase the skills you want in a much quicker way. MyPlayer also has this strange RPG like conversation trees that pop up. They usually only pop up once during a cut scene, annoyingly they only have two repercussions; 1: you’re super nice to everyone or 2: you’re a complete asshole to everyone. There’s a big leap between these two decisions. The game even made me question my own morals, well, for a couple of seconds anyway, when a scene happened where my old high school coach asked for some money to repair the gym back at my old school. Of course initially I was happy to lend a hand… until I found out that it was actually asking for 1000 VC, the in game currency! I changed my mind immediately, screw the school. I need to increase my player’s attributes! Also returning from last year and tied to MyPlayer is MyPark, which is now a more community focused online mode. From first accessing MyPark you can choose between three different factions to join, each utilizing your player’s strengths and weaknesses from your attributes. I haven’t had the chance to play much of MyPark due to server issues

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and general laggy-ness, but 2K seemed to have put a lot more effort in making MyPark the place to be for playing online. MyGM is also back with some noticeable improvements. If you like to take control of not only the player but everything else that happens off court then MyGM has you covered. The improved conversation system has better roles than before and can affect player’s performances for the good or bad. So trying to please every player can end up hurting a few feelings. The amount of stuff available to do in MyGM can seem a tad daunting at first but most of the actions that you can do you really don’t need to pay that much attention to, such as increasing the price of merchandise etc. MyTeam hasn’t really changed at all; it’s still pretty much creating your own fantasy basketball team, beating challenges, facing other players online with all the frustrations of card packopenings. A nice new addition is the ‘auction house’ where you can buy or sell players for in-game currency, to save you the hassle of constantly buying packs. SO… the game needs patched and fixed as soon as possible. It’s annoying when you’re supposed to be enjoying the game you’re playing, having everything just goes tits up because a dodgy animation occurs spoils everything. I can put up with one or two muck ups but not when they’re happening constantly. So I would recommend you perhaps hanging off on buying 2K15 until a patch comes out that at least’s improves the gameplay. Sam Sheppard GoGuide Magazine Games Contributor


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OUTABOUT &

IN WEST LOTHIAN

The Bennie Museum

The Bennie Museum opened in 1989 as a museum of Bathgate’s history and life. It is run entirely by volunteers under the management of a Charitable Trust. It has been commended by the Association of Scottish Visitor Attractions. www.benniemuseum.org.uk 11am - 4pm (Apr to Sep) & 11am -3.30pm (Oct to Mar) - FREE 9-11 Mansefield Street, Bathgate, EH48 4HU 01506 634944

Almond Valley Heritage Trust,

Almond Valley is operated as a popular leisure destination that appeals to a diverse audience and promotes learning through discovery, family interaction and play. We also operate a formal education programme. www.almondvalley.co.uk Millfield, Livingston, EH54 7AR 01506 414957

The Garage Skatepark

The Garage Skatepark is an indoor skatepark based in Livingston which is being improved on constantly to give skaters the best experience around. The park is open to Skateboards ,Inline Skates and BMX. Kids under 16 wanting to ride at the park will be required to wear a helmet. The park also has its very own shop stocking Boards, Wheels, Trucks, T-shirts and other accessories. www.thegarage.zxq.net Mon - Sat: 10am - 10pm - Sun: 10am - 8pm 5D Grange Road, Houston Industrial Estate, EH54 5DE 01506 530892

Bankhead Mountainball

Like many ‘extreme’ sports, Zorbing, Orbing or Sphereing was created in New Zealand back in 1994. The concept is quite simple, you build a human sphere which can accommodate up to two fully grown adults, secure them inside then let them roll down a hill in it (hamsters have been exercised for many years in a very similar way!) www.bankheadmountainball.co.uk Contact for opening hours Bankhead Farm, Dechmont, Broxburn, EH52 6NB 01506 811209

Delta Force Paintball

Delta Force Paintball provides world class paintballing in Scotland. In addition to the scenery, incredible game zones provide players with an adrenalin-fuelled day of paintball action all year round. www.paintballgames.co.uk Weekends + 1 Weekday - check online for details Off Burnhouse Road, Dechmont, Livingston, EH49 6PL 0844 477 5050

Funtastic Fantasy Golf Limited

Miniature golf arena but it’s one with a difference it’s BLACK-LIGHT UV which means that not only do the 3D prop’s glow in the dark but also the golf balls and art work on the wall do too. This facility is a fantastic family day out for all ages & abilities with a cafe that sell homemade food made onsite at their cafe ‘Dino Bites’

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Mon - Sun: 10:00 am - 10:00 pm 3 St Andrews Way, Livingston, EH54 8HQ 07935 576943

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A1 PAINTBALL

A1 Paintball was established in 2002 with one goal in mind, giving their customers an open and honest paintball experience from start to finish and with no hidden extras. They provide only the very best and most comprehensive paintballing equipment and event management. Haggs Road Wood Burnwynd, Nr Edinburgh, Midlothian EH27 8ED 01501 741709

Racing Karts

Racing Karts quickly established itself as a force in Indoor Kart Racing due to its attention to safety, cleanliness and customer satisfaction. They like to call themselves ‘The Friendly Circuit’ www.racingkarts.co.uk Times: Booking required - call to arrange Arrol Square, Deans Industrial Estate, Livingston, EH54 8QZ 01506 410123

Livingston Skate Park

The Livingston Skatepark opened in 1981, at a time when most commercial skateparks were closing and was one of the most important facilities in Britain during a critical period in the development of skateboarding. It is an example of a free, unsupervised facility which achieved international status. Daylight access all year round FREE 16 Northwood Park, Opposite Almondvale Shopping Centre, Livingston, EH54 6HR

Deer Park Ten Pin Bowling

Deer Park Bowling Centre is a 16 Lane Bowling Centre with the capacity to hold 128 bowlers. There is a bar and food served throughout. At ‘Late night Glow Bowling’ the lights are dimmed and the lanes come alive with GLOW IN THE DARK, ULTRA VIOLET lighting effects and music. www.deer-park.co.uk Mon-Thur: 4pm-10pm / Fri: 12pm-midnight / Sat: 10am-midnight / Sun: 10am-10pm Golf Course Road, Livingston, EH54 8AB - 01506 446699

Five Sisters Zoo

The Five Sisters Zoo was established in 2005 and is the only wildlife attraction centre in West Lothian. With over 100 different species of animals, birds and reptiles from all around the world your visit will be a fun, enjoyable and educational one - all ages. www.fivesisterszoo.co.uk Open 7 Days a week - 10am - 6pm (5pm Winter half of year) Gavieside, West Calder, EH55 8PT 01506 871 111

Overboard Soft Play

Overboard Soft Play is an exciting indoor Soft Play and entertainment venue for kids aged 0-11 yrs. They have it all, from chutes to ball pits to go-karts to ball cannons. With an underwater theme and seperate play zones for different age groups and abilities, your children are sure to have a great time from the minute they arrive until it’s time to go home. www.overboardsoftplay.com Wed - Sun: 10:15 am - 6:00 pm 3 St Andrews Way, Livingston, EH54 8HQ - 01506 873888

If you want to appear in our ‘stuff to do in the West Lothian’ pages drop us some details and we will try our best to get it added content@goguidemagazine.co.uk / www.goguidemagazine.co.uk NOV 2014 - issue (44)

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IND S M R T’ E NEV LOCKS I BOL E H T E

ALBUM COVERS 1

TH IDE U G GO USIC M IZ U Q WERS

2

ANS

Led Zeppelin III Led Zeppelin

4

3

NEXT LINES 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Midnight to six man...

Master Of Puppets Metallica

Songs For The Deaf Queens Of The Stone Age

In Utero Nirvana

...For the first time from Jamaica. The Clash - White Man In Hammersmith Palais

5

It might seem crazy what I’m about to say... ...Sunshine she’s here, you can take away. Pharrell Williams - Happy I have climbed the highest mountains...

...I have run through the fields. U2 - I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For

Guess it’s true, I’m not good at a one-night stand.... ...But I still need love ‘cause I’m just a man. Sam Smith - Stay With Me Let me take you down...

...Cause I’m going to Strawberry Fields. Beatles - Strawberry Fields Forever

The Bends Radiohead

6

When you try your best but you don’t succeed... ...When you get what you want but not what you need. Coldplay - Fix You She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene... ...I said don’t mind, but what do you mean, I am the one. Michael Jackson - Billie Jean Written in these walls are the stories that I can’t explain... ...I leave my heart open but it stays right here empty for days. One Direction - Story Of My Life

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Quadrophenia The Who


MOV IE Q RUB UIZ BED

THE OUT M HOW OVIE D ALL ETAI MAN L Y D GET ID YO S RIGH U T?

1

TAMMY

2

BRIDESMAIDS

3 THE LEGO MOVIE

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Source: http://en.wikipedia.org

CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS 101

F

riday the 13th is a 1980 American slasher film directed by Sean S. Cunningham and written by Victor Miller. The film concerns a group of teenagers who are murdered one by one while attempting to re-open an abandoned campground, and stars Betsy Palmer, Adrienne King, Harry Crosby, Laurie Bartram, Kevin Bacon, Jeannine Taylor, Mark Nelson and Robbi Morgan. It is considered one of the first “true” slasher movies.

Prompted by the success of John Carpenter’s Halloween, the film was made on an estimated budget of $550,000 and released by Paramount Pictures in the United States and by Warner Bros. in Europe. When originally released, the film received negative reviews from film critics. It grossed over $39.7 million at the box office in the United States. It has developed a cult following in the years that followed, and it has become one of the most profitable slasher films in cinema history. It was also the first movie of its kind to secure distribution in the USA by a major studio, Paramount Pictures. The film’s box office success led to Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981), a long series of sequels, a crossover with the A Nightmare on Elm Street franchise and a 2009 series reboot. Page 112

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