Love and Loyalty
By Perpetua Huang
Blurb
The simple, undoubted love for his family and
nation fills Anthony’s heart. But how would a young,
passionate heart bear the pain of giving up his first love
and hiding it deeply inside his mind for a lifetime if a
conflict occurred? For him, there are too many
unanswerable questions.
About the Author
Perpetua Huang, a 20-year-old Taiwanese student who
was born in Tainan, is now a junior-college student of
Wenzao Ursuline College of Languages. She is a rather honest
person so that she especially likes to write true stories instead
of untrue fantasies.
Love and Loyalty Characters +
Anthony Huang, the main character: responsible and
silent, supports the whole family
+
Ruth Jo, Anthony’s wife: obedient and diligent
+
Cathy, Anthony’s first lover: lovely and understanding
+
Anthony’s father: got the Muscular dystrophy in his
middle age
+
Anthony’s mother: a tough woman
Love and Loyalty Content List Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Anthony’s Family
Anthony’s Marriage
Chapter 3
Being a Soldier
Chapter 4
A New Era
Chapter 5
Family Tragedy
Chapter 6 Two Orphans
Chapter 7
Getting Old
Chapter 1
Anthony’s Family
I am the first child of the Huang family, descendent of
Han people. My ancestors moved to Southern Taiwan from
Fujian Province and dwelled here in Ching Dynasty. When I was
born, it was the Japanese-Occupied Period.
In this period, people in Taiwan saw Japan as our own
country. Taiwan was part of Japan, and we all belonged to the
Japan Empire. I appreciated my Japanese teachers and the
Japanese conquerors for their contributions in Taiwan. Later, I
became an elementary school teacher.
My job as a teacher was the most suitable occupation for
me. It was one of the most honorable occupations. I could not
only educate our offspring, but also help a little with my family
finance. I did not get high salary, but it was a better one
compared to others. Every time I got my salary envelop, I gave
it to my mother immediately without opening it. My parents
were farmers throughout their life. The income of farming was
unstable. I had three little brothers and sister, and all of them
were still studying.
Our life was difficult, but it even got worse when my
father got the Muscular dystrophy. He could only sit on an
armchair. I saw him weaker and weaker day by day, and it was a
great sorrow for me.
I met my first and perhaps, the only love of my life in the
school. She was my co-worker, Cathy, an attractive figure on
campus: caring, understanding, and lovely. Every workday, I
glimpsed at her when passing by her class. I loved my job, and
the presence of Cathy gave me full energy.
Our life was difficult as before while the World War II began.
Sometimes we needed to hide in an air-raid shelter when
hearing loud engine noises, but I still appreciated our life
compared to other people of other areas.
I dedicated more to my job, and sometimes I volunteered
to help with the mechanical work of the school. When I was
working, Cathy would help me as an assistant. We chatted and
knew each other more about our background, passion, and goals
of life. After working, we used to take a walk on campus. It was
relaxing walking among those old trees and Japanese-style
architecture, and chatting with the girl I admired so much.
When she smiled warmly to me, I thought of our possible
bright future. I thought that if my dream had come true, I would
have been the luckiest person in the world.
Chapter 2
Anthony’s Marriage
I was twenty-four then, when one evening we were having
supper, my mother looked serious than ever. I felt that there
must be something wrong. I waited for my mother to speak
first, feeling a little anxious about what would be going on next.
“You’re already twenty-four, son. It’s about time to get
married,” she paused, “I’ve talked to the Jos, who owned some
lands. Their daughter is capable of farming, so I think she is the
best choice for you.�
Mother had arranged the entire thing. She chose a girl who
could help my family with the farming. I was not surprised at all
and remained silent. Mother seemed a little impatient not
knowing what I was thinking about.
“Anthony, your father and I can only rely on you. Marry to
that girl. She will help us a lot.�
I looked at my little brothers. They were eating like tigers
and wolves. I felt pity because we never had enough food. At the
mean time, I felt sorry for my miserable father, who was lying
on bed desperately in the next room. There was no cure for this
rare disease. How miserable he was! Hopelessly, he could only
wait…until the end. I should obey my mother, and that would
be a consolation for the entire family.
“Yes, and what’s her name?” I said finally, obediently as usual.
“Her name’s Ruth Jo,” Mother said, with a smile, “Your
wedding will be in two weeks.�
She seemed relieved.
I had never seen Ruth Jo before. What I only knew was that
her parents owned some lands. I could not imagine I would marry
to a young woman I had not seen before in two weeks. I
thought of Cathy. I thought a lot, but always, my conclusion was
to be obedient to my mother. With a daughter-in-law who was
capable of farming, Mother would be glad, and our farm could
be managed well. I must support my family.
Soon we informed the news to school because it was
necessary to send invitations to acquaintances. Cathy and I both
avoided looking into the eyes of each other. I even felt painful
when our eyes fixed together in the air by chance. We never
worked or took a walk together again‌ I destroyed my dream of
living happily with Cathy. It was sad, and I became more silent
ever after.
On the wedding day, Ruth came to my place on foot alone.
This was the first time I saw her. When she arrived, her relatives
had already been here socializing for a while. I could not smile,
but only answered their numerous questions. They praised me
a lot because of my occupation and my look. I felt shy and
hoped this situation would end quickly.
I could not sleep well for several nights thinking of Cathy
and about this marriage. I had obeyed my mother. This
marriage was only because that Ruth had never received
formal education so that she always helped with farming at
home. It was ridiculous: a woman capable of farming? “It’s just
like marrying to a cow,” I thought, making fun of myself. However,
for supporting my family, it was worthy.
I kept all the happy memories with Cathy inside my mind
as a secret. I still felt melancholic sometimes, but I realized what
marriage meant gradually. Marriage was not only heavy
responsibility, but also support and share in real life. This was
love. Ruth was a responsible wife. She took care of the family
and did the cooking as well as farming.
Our financial problem was still a burden. I gave all my
salary to Mother as before, but I could feel the unhappiness of
Ruth. All of the time, both of us did not have any penny in the
pocket. “Only if Mother is happy,” I thought, “it is fine with me”.
Later my little brothers and sister all went to Taipei for
university, and they all dominated there after they graduated.
Cathy went to another school and got married. Sometimes the
destiny brought people apart fast. Perhaps it was better not to
see her again.
Chapter 3 Being a Soldier
It was the June of 1945; all the schools in Taiwan were
informed that the Japanese Government was soliciting soldiers to
fly to Southeast Asia. The war situation of Japan was already not
good then. People were not optimistic. Moreover, because of the
lack of goods and materials, these soldiers who would fly to
Southeast Asia would only have enough oil to arrive there, but
none to return.
The government claimed that each school should have at
least one teacher to reply for the call. I was thinking about the
request. I felt passionate from the bottom of my young heart—to
be a soldier and fight for Japan. Maybe I could do this great thing
for the Japanese Empire although I would die on the battlefield.
I felt that I was a son of the Japanese emperor, so attending the
war was an obligation. I was willing to reply, but I should also
consider for my family.
That evening I talked to my mother about it. She was
obviously unhappy. Ruth looked worried, but she did not say a
word. This was a real struggle for the whole family, but the
situation was rather difficult because in the school, only the
president and I were male. This meant that if I did not go, the
president should go. I felt sympathetic for his family; he already
had little children, and actually he was not willing to attend the
war and to die in Southeast Asia.
“This is the war,” I said gently but firmly, “How can I avoid
being a soldier?”
“But you will never return!” Mother exclaimed.
“Since the war began, I have already set up my mind that if
some day I should fight for Japan, I will go without a thought.”
They could not figure out any solution and could only give
up persuading me not to go. Really, I was not afraid of death, but
what I cared about was loyalty. The next day, I told the president
of the school about my decision. He thanked me and praised
me for my bravery and loyalty. Soon I went to the barracks for
training. I never thought about attending the war without feeling
glorious.
We were treated very well in the barracks because we
dared to sacrifice our lives. It was an unforgettable period of my
life. We looked forward to going to Southeast Asia. However, it
was astonishing that in only around one month after we started
training, Japan surrendered on August 15th, 1945. We were
informed that the Americans had tossed two atomic bombings on
August 6th and 9th in Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and there were
heavy casualties. The Japanese could not stand another atomic
bombing, so Japan gave up struggling and the World War II
ended completely.
I felt sad. We had not flown to Southeast Asia yet, but Japan
surrendered! My country failed! I saw all the people mourning
for Japan on my way home from the barracks. Then thousands of
big tears kept welling along my cheeks.
Chapter 4
A New Era
All my acquaintances felt relieved for me, but I was still sad
until I knew that Ruth was pregnant. I felt lucky that I had
returned home alive, or I would be an irresponsible father.
During this period, the Nationist government came to
Taiwan, and a new era began. Taiwanese were disappointed by soldiers
from Mainland China. They looted and raped wherever they went. It
was the darkest period of Taiwan, and my first two children Anna and
Kevin were born at this time. The economy became worse and worse.
Then the 228 Incident happened in 1947. It was horrible. Taiwanese
people and the new Chinese immigrants attacked each other. We
had difficulties communicating due to different dialects and
accents, and there was hate between the two groups.
My family avoided all the possible hatred. It was totally
unworthy to fight against the new immigrants from Mainland
China. We belonged to the same nation, and we were hurting
each other! There were so many things we could not understand.
After this unsafe time, the government imposed the martial
law. My last child David was born then. The President Chiang
Kai-shek invited teachers for small interviews in the presidential
palace. I went to Taipei for this honorable meeting. I was led into
the room, and I saw Chiang Kai-shek face to face! I pretended
calm, and we greeted each other.
“When was the happiest time in your life?� he asked.
“I think it was the time when I got my first salary and
gave it to my mother,” I said.
He was surprised with my answer, and he stood up shaking
my hand.
“You’re such a filial son!” he said.
Then he asked me another two questions. He was
impressed by me, and I admired the leader.
Later, we expanded our house when our finance
became better. I thanked Ruth for all her hard work. Finally, we
escaped from the poverty! Anna married to Jason, a wealthy
man in the near town. My miserable father met his end being
totally immobilized one day, and he stopped breathing. I felt
great sympathy for him. However, maybe it was better to die
than to live without hopes.
The health of Mother got worse then. Sometimes she
asked to meet my youngest brother and sister, but they seldom
returned home. Mother also went to Taipei a few times to visit
them. I could feel the preference of Mother towards them when I
was younger, but I could never understand why. Every time
Mother met them, she gave them money secretly even though
they already could earn their own living. Well, it was better not
to compare the amounts of love Mother gave us, or I would make
myself miserable‌
Kevin set up a factory. Later I quitted my job and helped
Kevin with his factory. Then he got married with Catherine, a
diligent Hakka girl. Some relatives disagreed with the marriage
because they had the same last name: Huang. We Han people
had the traditional belief that a couple with the same last name
was a curse, but Ruth and I did not believe this. Furthermore,
Kevin chose to marry to Catherine on his own. We did not want
to interfere with their choice.
Chapter 5
Family Tragedy
Mother was upset during her last period of life. My
youngest brother and sister, Tom and Kerry, did not obey when
Mother wanted them back.
“It’s unworthy caring so much for them,” Mother once said,
“they’ve abandoned me!”
I was sad hearing these words. The most loved children of
Mother did not accompany her when she needed it.
“Mother,” Ruth said, “we’re beside you all the time. If you
need anything, tell us, and we’ll try our best to make it.”
I could feel the grievances inside Ruth’s words, and I felt
the same. We were always beside Mother serving her and
obeying her, but she still looked for the care from Tom and Kerry
only. I walked out of the living room, and could not stand my
tears flowing down.
I was beside Mother when she was dying. All my brothers
and sister rushed back home. After the funeral, we soon
divided the family property because they were asking me.
Actually, most of the family properties were earned by Ruth and I,
but still we divided them equally. Besides, Mother had given Tom
extra fortune privately. I did not want to haggle with them;
after all, they were my brothers and sister.
Kevin and Catherine had two children. We managed
our factory well. Everything went smoothly.
When Kevin was studying in high school, he already had
problems with his nose. We thought that it was a serious
allergy, but his serious allergy restarted then. It was weird,
and he went to see a doctor.
Then we received really bad news. It was not serious
allergy. It was cancer窶年asopharyngeal carcinoma! At that
time, cancer was a rare disease. It was almost untreatable.
Oh, my young son, how could it be possible? How
unfortunate we were!
Kevin was only around 30 then, and his children were
only around 5. If he could not recover, then it would be the
saddest thing we could ever imagine. We could not escape
from the anxiety of losing Kevin. We tried all the possible
way to find effective treatments no matter traditional
Chinese medical science or Western medical science.
Kevin got angry easily then. On one hand, he continued
to manage the factory; on the other hand, he was flurried
with the disease. We were all tolerant but worried about
him a lot.
Ruth often decocted herbal medicine for Kevin. Once
he overturned it from her hand at once. The herbal
medicine spilt out onto the ground, and the bowl was
broken to pieces. Ruth was frightened about what her
well-educated son had done, and crying left him alone. I
looked at Kevin, my docile son, and left as well.
Kevin started to receive electrotherapy in a clinic,
hoping to kill the cancer cells.
After receiving electrotherapy for months, Kevin and we
went to the hospital to have the routine check on his
health. The facial expression of the doctor was serious. The
situation was the worst of all.
“You know what? You’ve overdone the electrotherapy.”
We could not understand what the doctor meant, but
there must be something totally wrong.
“Ordinary people should have hundred thousands of cells,
but he only has around three thousand now!” the doctor
said, “The cells were killed by the electricity. The good cells
are few, and the cancer cells grew more. For Kevin, now it’s
more difficult to defeat the cancer.”
Our hopes were broken at once. Kevin hid his face with
hands, sobbing.
“Doctor, please save my son,” Ruth begged.
The doctor looked gloomy.
“Doctor, what can we do now?” I asked trembling.
“Well, I’m sorry. I cannot do anything for you now.
Please go home and wait.”
We were desperate and left the hospital at last. However,
when we were still on our way home, Kevin was extremely
painful. He had a serious stomachache.
He was crying horribly, so I drove back to the hospital
immediately. We were in a hurry, rushing to the emergency
ward at once. Kevin was sent to the operation room.
Doctors rushed in. We were waiting anxiously outside the
room, and praying, but no more than five minutes the upset
doctors walked out.
“There’s no need to do the surgery now. You can go and
see.�
Go and see? Ruth and I rushed into the operation
room.
It was smelly and the scene was horrible. We could
see the open stomach of Kevin, and the intestines were
split, with excrement all over. They had burst inside his
stomach! Ruth fainted. I could see Kevin carefully. His facial
expression was so painful although he was injected a strong
anesthetic. My eyesight became vague because of tears. I
could not define whether he was dead or alive, but it was
too late!
I supported Ruth out of the operation room, and then
we both cried violently.
“Kevin! Kevin! My young son, ah … How can you leave us
so early? What about your children? And what can we do
without you?” Ruth cried uncontrollably.
In my mind, there were hundreds of “why�, but I knew
that there was no answer I could accept. Answers were all
in vain. At that moment, I understood one of the saddest
things in the world: to die miserably without dignity.
Chapter 6
Two Orphans
We mourned a lot and thought of Kevin frequently.
Catherine was always sad. She could hardly smile, but she paid
more attention to her little children as they were her only
treasure.
I managed the factory with other shareholders. Every
morning, I rode motorcycle carrying Catherine to the factory. The
factory was what Kevin had left for us.
That was a cloudy day, and we were on our way to the
factory as usual. The traffic was quite heavy. Cars were running
fast beside our motor. It seemed dangerous, and Catherine was
holding me tightly. I could feel that she was afraid. I was afraid as
well, feeling the strange atmosphere of that morning.
I did not know why, but it happened. I heard a crash clearly,
and at the next moment we were on the ground. Cars were still
running fast near us. I saw my own blood, feeling hurt. I pulled
Catherine’s hands away, and turned back to see if she was all
right. She was still lying on the ground. Her head was bleeding,
and there was blood coming out from her left ear.
I was scared, holding her up a little. She was trying to say
“no.”
“Everything will be all right,” I comforted her.
But she fainted. There were people around us. They called
the ambulance. We were sent to a hospital together.
Then Catherine died… I could not believe what had
happened. I even did not know how the accident occurred. I
looked at her body, and it was so true!
“I’m sorry!” I cried out at that moment.
How could it be? Kevin had just passed away two years ago,
and then it was Catherine! No, please! No!
The ambulance sent Catherine’s body and I back home.
Ruth was already crying, standing with Anna and the two
children. The two children were hiding behind Anna. Ruth came
near.
“Why’s that? …Why?”
I started sobbing. All of them started sobbing as well…
The curse of our tradition really came true. The couple died
young, and their little children became orphans. Perhaps
human beings could never defeat the fate.
We were burning ghost money, and we heard the two
children talking.
“Father died, and now Mother is dead as well. We’re so
miserable…”
Chapter 7
Getting Old
Since the young couple died, I usually sat at my desk
silently and alone, thinking about the dying process of my
weak father, the last scene I saw Kevin in the operation
room, and the car accident which killed Catherine. They
died, but I survived. All of those were messy inside my mind.
I was imprisoned by the horrible memories. They were like
shadows from which I could not escape.
We closed the factory, and I bought some lands. They
would be the family properties for my descendants. I
worked as a farmer. My youngest son David helped us with
finance to bring the two orphans up.
I went to Japan once with my classmate to search for
my Japanese teachers. We could still recognize them
although many years had passed. We talked about our lives,
and we still cared for each other. I cherished the
Japanese-Conquered Period a lot. Travelling in Japan was
like going back to my pure past. I did not want my life fill up
with tragedies, I wanted to be free!
Ruth and I were both in our eighties. She had some
surgeries from time to time because of the liver cancer. On
the contrary, I was rather healthy, and I still worked on the
farm.
I took care of Ruth after a surgery. There were only
Ruth and I lived at home then. For three whole days, I stayed
home with her without going out. I felt annoyed, so I called
Anna back home. I was eager to go to the farm.
Anna came back and accompanied Ruth. It was around
four o’clock when I went out on my scooter. I felt relieved
exposing to the autumn wind.
I crossed the road. Suddenly, I saw a truck running
towards me with extreme speeds, but it was too late‌ I was
hit seriously by the truck at the next moment.
My scooter was ruined at once and I flew up crashing
on the glass of the truck. I fell down rolling on the ground.
Some parts of my body were wet. It smelled like blood.
Then I felt extremely hurt... There was a voice calling me. It
must be the truck driver. I felt cold and heard the
ambulance siren. I was lifted up. I felt painful and noisy. I
was too tired to open my eyes, and then it was warmer. I
fell asleep.
It became cold again, and I was trembling. I heard
Anna crying and calling me, but I could not answer her.
There were sounds of quick steps.
Perhaps it was too late. Perhaps I would meet my end
this time‌
I felt extremely painful. I was still bleeding. I thought of
Ruth, my loyal wife. I thought of Kevin, my miserable young son.
I thought of my weak and desperate father. I thought of my
lovely grandchildren. I heard doctors talking. I fell asleep again.
I slept for a long time until I heard some repetitive chants. It
was my youngest granddaughter and a Sister.
There were sounds of medical machines. I could see some
lights at first, and next I saw them. My granddaughter was
holding my hand. I held it tightly trying to inform her that I was
awake.
Well, I survived again. Later I was performed the
tracheotomy surgery, a surgery I was against very much. I did not
want to live without dignity and hopes, but I had no choice.
Now I cannot walk, eat, nor speak. I am lying on bed
desperately. I can only wait‌until the end. I am like my miserable
father now. Tears still well, and I still think about the past.
Acknowledgement Page
I deeply appreciate my grandfather, the main character
Anthony in this true story. His story is always impressed in my
mind because he has dedicated all to my family.
References http://activatingthoughts.blogspot.tw/2013/03/the-island-of-feeli
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http://big5.xinhuanet.com/gate/big5/news.xinhuanet.com/mil/2 010-01/07/content_12768638.htm
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&n=30&ei=utf-8&fr=yfp&ri=8&tab=organic&ri=8
http://tw.image.search.yahoo.com/search/images?p=CRYING&n
=30&ei=utf-8&fr=yfp&tab=organic&ri=10
http://tw.image.search.yahoo.com/search/images?p=LONGLY&n
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Love and Loyalty By Perpetua Huang
Implicit love and loyalty have occupied Anthony’s whole
life, and what he does is based on the foundation: to be gentle,
to be obedient, and to be considerate. But what should he do
when encountering conflicts inside his mind? Words in Oxford 3000™ = [91%] Written by Perpetua of E4B Instructor: Kenneth M. Smith Wenzao Ursuline College of Languages Kaohsiung, Taiwan June 2013