HERS magazine Sept/Oct 2015

Editor-in-Chief, Annette Johnson Design Director, Joey Shepherd Online Editor, Bianca Nelson Travel Editor, Peggy Hattendorf Social Media Director, Tamara King Editorial Assistant, Britney Hardweare Sales Manager, Mary Carr Special Projects Manager, Veronique Thomas Contributors: Jennifer Adams Fran Bishop Lauren Carson Jovia D’Souza Sara Jackson Jaime Johnson Sol Ami Patria Larita Rice Kyree Shockley Jack Wilson Taylor Rica Wiersema Lenise Williams Cover photo: Thao Doan Customer Service For subscription service or change of address, including email, contact info@hersmagazine.net or write to P.O. Box 1071, Atlanta, GA 30301 Hers (ISSN 2372-3785) is published six times per year by Allwrite Communications, 241 Peachtree Street NE, Suite 400, Atlanta, GA 30303 404-221-0703

October

CONTENTS F E AT U R E S

10 Breaking Rap Stereotypes: HeeSun Lee

The Asian rapper adjusts to career independence and motherhood

35 LaShon Thompson’s Real Life Hustle T.I.’s Ex Talks New Life and TV Show: Mother Funder$

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War Room Over Comes in the Box Office: The Kendrick Brothers have done it again with the of their leading lady, Priscilla Shirer.

52 Ronda

20 Versatile Transitional Outfits for Your Home: How to Create a Décor Foundation for Late Summer into Fall Tips for transitioning home décor from summer to fall without changing everything

Rousey

32 Here Comes Sex Ed 102

Should a woman really do EVERYTHING that a man can?

52 Reality TV’s Unintended Victims: The Family

New show provides answers to lingering questions

The real consequences reality TV families are paying for the price of fame

9 Health and Beauty Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar

This kitchen cabinet wonder can be a natural remedy for beauty disasters

40 Grey Hair Is a Top Trend for 2015 Stop hiding those grey hairs and wear them proudly, you’re a trendsetter in 2015

50 Seven Tips to Becoming A Stylish Mompreneur Don’t let those mom jeans hold you back from getting your next client

80 Bowling for Food Malika

Bowling Shares Dining Insight and Inspiration

55 How Wearable Technologies Are Shaping Our Future Incorporating

wearable technologies into daily life can improve healthy living

68 Tips on How to Avoid Giving Discounts on Your Business Three Ways to Avoid

Requests to Discount Your Services

28 Beauty from the Inside Out Lizzie Velásquez documentary reveals her ‘Brave Heart’

H E R H E A LT H 15 The Four P’s of Staying Focused Tools on how to persevere during hectic and challenging time

weight loss morale

The best ways to see Autumn in its prime

you the one who is making yourself nuts?

serial entrepreneur took notes and

54 Straight Outta Competition: Ronda Rousey Should a woman really

do EVERYTHING that a man can?

58 Wondaland Proves Teamwork Make the Dream work on Eephus Tour A review of her latest tour’s final stop in Atlanta

79 Can People Make You Crazy? You blame them but are

now shares them

Harris argues the way to a man’s heart IS through his stomach in her new book

78 How Often Should You Step On the Bathroom Scale? Obsession with checking the scale can be harmful to your

16 Arian Simone’s Life Lessons ‘From Homeless to Hollywood’ The fearless

22 Can a Sex Cookbook Be the Answer to Your Relationship Issues? Myra

82 Women Instinctively Have What It Takes To Make Partnerships Work Through Partnership: Review Is girl power really the answer for shattering the glass ceiling?

66 Ah…Autumn---The Perfect Time to Travel

72 R&B Ladies of the ‘80s”: Spotlight on Monifah Catch up with one of the most popular music divas from the ‘80s

83 Day in TV’s ‘Paternity Court’ Resolves Real-Life Questions New Reality TV shows to look out for in the fall

71 Hobbies That Pay: Personal Shopping

Getting paid to shop seems too good to be true, right? Wrong.

6 ISSUES FOR

JUST $9.95

F E AT U R E S • H E A R T • F L AVO R • H E A LT H L E S S O N S • W O R K • P L AY W W W. H E R S - M A G A Z I N E . C O M 6

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Editor’s Letter My feelings about this issue are encapsulated in one statement: beauty is immaterial. Beauty is an energy that excites more than just our eyes. It inspires us to love, care, change, and hope. Among other things, it is witnessed in the motivation that drives selfless deeds. Our cover girl, Lizzie Velásquez, exudes beauty in this less common alignment of the term. In fact, if you have never been called beautiful for nonphysical traits, you still have growing to do. To that end, we have loaded this issue with women who are attractive in an unconventional sense. Whether it be their mind or heart, these women share their journeys in music (Heesun Lee), marketing (Arian Simon) and even meals (Malika Bowling), which have all ended well, garnering them fame and fortune. However, each woman had to redefine and embrace beauty in an alternate regard in order to overcome their circumstances. Once you read their stories, hopefully they will inspire introspection and reflection.

No one succeeds alone, and throughout my life, this has been a recurring theme. Even if you think you have done it all by yourself or mainly by yourself, that success will never be enjoyable or fully satisfying alone. So when we highlight topics like love and even travel in this issue, you’ll see that everything is better with a

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companion. The key is to find the “right” friend, mate, spouse and the like to share your experiences with. Maybe you already have that person(s) or you’re still looking. Either way, never get too busy or isolated to recharge and reconnect. There is someone out there who needs you as much as you need them, and this has nothing to do with sex or money. It’s about a pure bond. We created HERS magazine for this reason. This is our place to connect to other like-minded women. Some you may never meet personally, but the admiration and empathy still exist nevertheless. This is all you need to at least feel connected. Welcome to HERS, and invite a friend.

Until next time, Annette R. Johnson

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+ HER BEAUTY

T H E

B E S T

N O N -T O X I C

NAIL POLISH

BY JOVIA D’SOUZA

The bottles of nail polish that you see lying around within your household or beauty centers come bearing a dirty secret most of the time. What we mean is that most of them, if not all, contain lots of chemicals that can pose a health hazard to your health. It can have a very strong smell and often leaving us wondering about the cause and whether it is supposed to be that way. There are a few nail polish options that are not toxic. They are the best option for you if you really care about your nails and it is really worth a try.

Common Toxic Substances in Regular Nail Polish

There are some issues that regular nail polish has. It is because of the toxic substances they contain, giving you more reasons to try non-toxic ones.

They include 3 chemicals: 1. Toluene, which is a chemical that can cause central nervous system issues and problems in the reproductive area as well as dizziness. It is a chemical present in gasoline.

2. Formaldehyde is a carcinogen used in the preservation of the dead and lab preparations. This chemical shouldn’t be inhaled or come in contact with skin

Mineral fusions: This one is long lasting and a chip resistant polish that is free of the bad chemicals. It is available in over 60 shades and the thick brush makes application easy.

some of the proceeds go to organizations empowering women. ·Scotch Naturals offers amazing colors and doesn’t have chemicals. · Keeki is a 100% biodegradable, gluten free and vegan polish variety.

· Sheswai is another natural brand. Instead of a plastic cap, wood that is sustainably harvested is used and some of the proceeds go to the World Wildlife Foundation. · ZOYA is another great choice without the toxins. It also doesn’t have formaldehyde resin or camphor. The shades are many and it lasts long.

· SunCoat is yet another amazing option that has a twist. It can peel off meaning that you will not have to use nail polish remover. It doesn’t last as long as the others though.

3. Dibutyl phthalate DBP is a chemical banned in Europe as it causes organ issues, reproductive issues and can disrupt the endocrine system.

The other healthy option

Now that we know about the bad effects of toxic varieties, it is time to choose healthy ones.

The fact that there is an option in natural nail polish should really give us hope as we can take care of our beauty needs without causing ourselves any harm.

· Color Club is a vegan nail polish and it isn’t tested on animals. It doesn’t have toxins.

· Julep by Jane Parks is yet another amazing There are amazing choices brand. It dries fast and has vibrant colors. that don’t have the above toxic It comes with a very professional brush and ingredients and they include: | HERS M a gazine | Se ptember/O c tob er 2015 | 8

Water based nail polish brands are more than what have been listed above. Always make a careful selection as your nails always deserve the best there is.

For the best water based nail polish brands available in the market today and try out the non-toxic nail polish that will not harm your nails. Always choose the best to have the best nails ever.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles. com/?expert=Jovia_D’Souza Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9144448

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+ HER BEAUTY

The Health and Beauty Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar

BY JAIME JOHNSON

D

id you know there is a product with a multitude of benefits that may already be in your kitchen’s cabinets? This wonder product has nutritional and health benefits, can be used in beauty treatments, and can even be used to clean your home. What is this miracle product? It is Apple Cider Vinegar.

ACV contains acids, such as lactic acid, which provide the vinegar’s health and healing benefits. This vinegar is a powerhouse with antiviral, antifungal, and antibacterial properties. When used externally, ACV helps the skin maintain its natural acidity levels.

Maintaining normal acidity levels are important for the skin, as it helps the skin to repair itself from damage. When the skin’s acidity levels are not at their normal levels, the skin tends to be dry, itchy, and may even crack.

What are some of the ways you can use ACV in your beauty routine?

Treat acne with ACV by dabbing your trouble spots with a diluted ACV solution. Mix a teaspoon of ACV to tablespoon of distilled water. Use a cotton ball to lightly pat the mixture on your acne and let dry. This mixture helps reduce inflammation and kills bacteria living on the skin.

Lighten age spots by mixing ACV and lemon juice, 1 teaspoon of each, and dabbing over the discoloration. Allow it to dry. This mixture must be used at least once a day and people have reported positive results within six weeks. Be sure to use sunscreen any time you are out during the day to prevent reappearance of these spots.

ACV is a popular remedy in the treatment of dandruff because of its antibacterial properties. Massage the vinegar directly onto the scalp and allow it to sit for fifteen minutes. Wash and rinse hair as normal.

Have foot odor? During your next foot soak, add 1 cup of ACV to the water. ACV is said to help remove the odor and also will help with any itching or dryness your feet may be experiencing.

For best results, use unpasteurized ACV. The pasteurizing process tends to neutralize many of the benefits of all natural products. The good news is that it is easy to make your own ACV

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at home. This recipe is not complicated, but it will require some patience.

You will need: • Two large glass jars (a gallon size is best) • Muslin, cheese cloth, or a kitchen towel to cover the jar • A rubber band • 5 large apples* • Distilled water • 1 cup sugar Chop the apples and place them into the bottom of the glass jar.

Make sure you include the entire apple (stems, seeds, peeling and all!) Completely cover the apple pieces with distilled water and stir in the sugar until it is completely dissolved. Cover the top of the jar with the cloth and secure it to the jar with the rubber band.

Allow the mixture to sit on your kitchen counter for a week, being sure to mix the contents once or twice a day.

After the first week, strain the liquid into a clean jar and discard the apple pieces. Cover the jar with a clean cloth and secure to the jar with a rubber band. Allow the mixture to sit in a cool, dark place for an additional 4-8 weeks. It is normal for the mixture to develop a whitish culture on top and this should be left in the jar during this period. *Feel bad wasting perfectly good apples on this recipe? Just save the peelings, cores, and seeds from consumed apples. You want enough to fill up at least half of the jar you will be making your ACV in. The final results will be just as good as if you used whole apples.

Taste your ACV and if you are happy with the level of acidity, strain the liquid and store in clean jars. Now go and use your homemade ACV as suggested above or in any other way you desire.

Jaime Johnson’s passion for all-natural products started as a challenge to produce high-quality health and beauty products, at home, from common household ingredients. This research lead to the creation of her book, Natural Beauty (www. naturalbeautythebook.com).

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+ H E R F E AT U R E

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+ H E R F E AT U R E

B R E A K I N G R A P ST E R E OT Y P E S :

HEE SUN

LEE Chances are, when you think rapper, you automatically think of names like Jay-Z, Snoop Dogg, Tupac Shakur, and so forth. Hip-hop is a maledominated genre, and even popular female rappers like Nicki Minaj or Lil Kim pander to male proclivities in their hyper-sexualized performances, which some critics blame, in part, for the demeaning, derogatory lyrics about women. Content analyses have found that approximately up to 37% of rap lyrics contain some misogyny. Queen Latifah once challenged this attitude in her song U.N.I.T.Y. in 1993, declaring, “Who you calling a bitch?� Moreover, today, few non-African American females get into the rap business much less attempt to break the stereotypes.

BY RICA WIERSEMA

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+ H E R F E AT U R E

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hether led by her own sense of passion or God, as she would say, Heesun Lee has dared to break the stereotype of the female sex object and racial slant in rap music. As Heesun’s songs suggest, she isn’t afraid to make her own style of hip-hop. She isn’t covered with gang symbols and tattoos, yet her style is urban, cutting-edge and all her own. Fans are drawn to her because of her blatant honesty, her trust in their intelligence, and her confidence in who she is regardless of expectations or stereotypes.

Born in South Korea, HeeSun was adopted by Chinese immigrants and brought to Staten Island as a child. She originally got into poetry and rap as a way of processing her emotional journey while growing up, and her debut album “RE:Defined” was released in 2008 with Jahrock’n. Her second album, “Stereotypes” was released in 2014 with In My City Records. Her songs explore the world of teenage drugs and depression (“Runaway,” “Life is Too Short”), being a female rapper (“Plastic,” “Role Model”), being a wife and mother (“Special Pick”), and even the reality of the danger that North Korean Christians live with every day (“North Korea”).

She currently lives in New York City with her husband, Timothy Chi, and daughter, Kayla. And Hers caught up to find out more about her future plans, especially, because she just announced in July that another baby is on the way. We wanted to hear how that would change her already-radical lifestyle.

“I just think hip hop in general, whether it’s the Christian community or the secular community… just women in hiphop is just… it’s very rare. And I myself, I’ve been doing this for so many years. I still kinda get it, and I kinda don’t get it.

Because it’s just so out of stereotypes, and that’s pretty much why I call my album [“Breaking Stereotypes”]. Not because I’m an Asian-American doing hip-hop, but also because I’m a female.

“You know, I feel like the world just kind of looks at us a little bit differently because we are female. They have more doubts, restrictions, limitations, and there have been so many females — especially in the Christian community — that have really been doing a great job and trying to prove them wrong. And for some reason people still place that on us, because they might be scared to book us. It’s harder dealing with a female, especially traveling, doing chores… the Christian side of things, kind of. You can’t put women and men together, so when you’re going on tour busses and stuff like that… and I have a kid. It’s hard to travel with them.

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“When you’re doing an all-male tour, or just booking males all the time, it’s just so much easier. So I feel in a lot of ways, people just go towards that… because it’s just more maledominated, because their faces are more well-known, and also because it’s just easier. So I feel like people don’t want to go that extra mile for a female, which is sad. That’s why I’ve been trying to work really hard and let people know that regardless of what we are we’re just as good. We’re just as talented. We’re bringing the Word. We’re saving lives. It shouldn’t really matter about those restrictions. As corny as it sounds, God will make it work.”

So being a mother and a rapper, how are you managing to keep it all together while traveling, recording and so forth?

Yeah, it’s been hard. I’m actually pregnant right now… and that was actually a hard decision in itself. As a family, when you want to have another kid, you’re just like, ‘Oh, financially, can we do it? Are we ready?’ You know, all the basic things that people worry about. hers-magazine.com

+ H E R FA I T H /S P I R I T UA L I T Y

THE 4 P’S OF STAYING FOCUSED

BY LARITA RICE

In today’s world, we are faced with many challenges on a daily basis that interrupt our stamina and stop our flow. They seemingly come at the most inopportune times. Some of these challenges may include loss of loved ones, business, and relationships. At times, it involves just plain struggling to keep balance and focus. I have encountered all of the above.

D

uring my journey as a woman of faith, business owner, pastor, author, and single mother, I had to come to grips with the fact that no matter how great things may be going, growing, and flourishing, life happens and storms will come out of nowhere even when the sun is shining brightly. The question is: how will we respond?

Here are some simple tips that you can use. I have put them into practice and received great results, allowing me to thrive from the highest peak of life to the lowest valley of life. I refer to them as the 4 P’s of staying focused.

The first one is Perception. What you see is what you get.

What we tend to fix our eyes on – whether it is internally or externally – is seemingly what will begin to manifest.

Perception creates energy that fuels manifestation. As a man thinketh, so is he (Proverbs 23:7). I love the glass half-full/halfempty analogy. Seeing the glass half empty could cause a loss of momentum, but if you see it as half-full, it fuels you to finish well.

The second P is for Passion. If you are going to stay focused on a task, it will take passion. It’s the compelling force that drives you to keep going no matter what. Some refer to it as

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“enthusiasm” or “excitement” for something. Having passion makes any task seem less difficult.

The third P will change your life forever. It is one that you cannot afford to abandon. Just as your eyes open in the morning and before you close them at night, you should release it. You should use it for every idea, endeavor, decision and relationship — whether it is business or personal. It’s called Prayer. This is the key to your divine instructions. It provides the answers and clarity to all of your uncertainties. It gives you peace on what to do and when to do it. It helps illuminate the wisdom needed to take your next steps toward victory.

Whatever you do, don’t abandon prayer.

Prayer also reveals this last P called Purpose. Purpose is the beginning and end of all things. We should always remember the reason behind what we are doing. It helps us to reach the endpoint with greater peace and satisfaction. Purpose is fulfilled by staying the course no matter who or what may come or go.

As a woman of faith and business with a burning zeal to finish strong and well, the 4 P’s of staying focused — Perception, Passion, Prayer and Purpose — can yield results in every area of your life, as it has mine. | Se ptem ber/O c to ber 2 0 1 5 | H ER S Ma gazin e |

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+ HER PERSONAL GROWTH

Riches to Rags and Back Again:

Arian Simone

BY ANNETTE JOHNSON

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ust call her “an entrepreneur,” she says.

That is the simplest way to describe the multifaceted life and career of 34-yearold Arian Simone. “I’m in love with the creation process, seeing things come to life.” Now with six streams of income, Simone says she has earned a six-figure salary since she was 21 in college and owned a boutique in the mall.

In high school, she was selected as one of the 20 students from around the country to receive a college scholarship from the Coca-Cola Scholars Foundation. Instead of going to her first choice of Harvard, she attended Florida A&M University (FAMU) School of Business and Industry (SBI) in Tallahassee, Florida, where she signed up for the five-year MBA program. “I’m so glad that I made the decision because I wound up being a businesswoman so heavily while I was in school,” she explained. By her sophomore year, she was a state of Florida realtor, and by junior year, she was operating her boutique.

In her first day of business, Arian says she made $5,000.

At times while in college, she thought, “Why am I going to class?” Focusing in college was admittedly difficult because she already knew what she wanted and was making a good living. She started college with a 4.0 and ended up with a 3.7, as she juggled her classes, career and ambition.

FAMU requires three professional internships in order to graduate, and Arian asked the dean, Dr. Sybil Collins Mobley, to make an exception in her case to allow her to do the third internship at her own company. “I was not about to leave my business to go jet off to corporate America and help other people with their business,” she said. With Dean Mobley’s blessing, she was allowed to apply her business training by doing something she loves: being an entrepreneur.

With her grandmother, a housekeeper, as her motivation, she completed her studies in under five years. While, she said, other students were asking her about attending fraternity parties, she was more focused on mingling with the likes of Russell Simons in Las Vegas, where she would fly out to attend celebrity events.

After moving to Los Angeles for her first job after college, the company was sold and she was laid off

+ HER HOME

VE RSATILE TRANSITIONAL OU TF ITS FOR YOU R HO M E:

Summer into fall HOW TO CR EAT E A DÉCOR

Foundation for Late

BY JENNIFER ADAMS

+ HER HOME

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chool’s starting, the sun is setting earlier, you can feel that touch of fall in the morning air… that magical weather between summer and fall is truly a bonus season! Cooler than summer and warmer than late fall, the afternoons and evenings are still nice enough to enjoy the outdoors and entertain in your backyard.

Along with your long sleeves, lightweight sweaters and jackets, it’s as refreshing as the weather to pull out some transitional outfits for your home décor. And save yourself some time later in the year by making decorating decisions that offer a foundation for your own holiday touches!

Creamy warm tones, whites and grays set the stage for holiday accents later in the year. Warm tones are comforting as the weather cools. And not only are whites beautiful and trendy, they go with anything including traditional fall décor and touches for: Halloween, Thanksgiving, and even Christmas and New Year’s parties!

Out with the breezy, light fabrics and in with wool, velvets and heavier weaves.

Swap out your wispy drapery panels and throw pillows for heavier prints and velvet. Colors can be darker and warmer, too. Spicy yellows, deep oranges and reds mixed with plum purples are more seasonable than cool blues and greens.

Add layers to your decor, just as you would for your wardrobe. Add tablecloths and runners to bare tables, area rugs to wood or carpeted floors, and cozy throw blankets to your sofas.

Dinner place settings can be more

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formal. In hot weather, who wants to clean all those dishes? It’s fun to dress up your table décor for fall. Add a charger under the dinner plates, more elaborate centerpieces and heavier fabrics for table cloths and napkins.

Change up your scented accessories! The richer, warmer scents add romance and comfort during the fall with candles, potpourri, diffusers or electric warmers.

Use deeper, spicier scents –think vanilla, musk, woodsy, leather notes and more complex scents rather than light florals.

Dress up the powder room. Replace white towels with richer tones, add metallic touches to the accessories and freshen the potpourri.

With a strong décor foundation of creamy tones, whites and grays, here are some ideas of how you can build upon and customize your look for the fall holidays.

Halloween: Switch out your tablecloths, placemats and napkins. Substitute your gray tones for black, and accent with orange! It’s a simple way to change up the kitchen for Halloween while still matching with the rest of the fall décor.

Put away your dinnerware. Carve soup or dessert bowls out of pumpkins for a natural, fun take. Play with varying sizes of the pumpkins for individual servings or dishes to be served family style.

Paint your pumpkins and gourds. Use a combination of black, gold and silver metallic pumpkins to decorate the house in a spooky, but sophisticated manner.

Naturally white pumpkins add an eerie but elegant touch, too.

For your centerpieces and other accents around your home, fill large clear vases with the smallest pumpkins, painted or not, mixed with black ribbon, candies in Halloween colors, and use lots of creepy looking candles in trays. Electric candles give off all the glow and less of the worry!

Thanksgiving: Create organic centerpieces! Use a carved-out pumpkin as a vase for fallcolored flowers and leafy twigs. Put on a silver or gold platter and surround it with gourds, dried whole cranberries, apples and leaves. Add bowls of nuts still in their shells along with small pumpkins and line up apples on the mantle.

Decorate the table with real leaves.

Collect colorful leaves, wash them in a colander and place them between paper towels. Stack books or magazines on top of the leaves to press them for a few days until they’re dry. The flattened leaves scattered on top of a white tablecloth look great and they won’t take up much space. You can set dishes, even wine glasses, right on top of them.

Burlap is inexpensive and can make fun rustic place mats and runners for your table. Cut to size and overlap pieces if necessary. Don’t even bother to hem the edges; the way the fabric unravels adds a delightful rustic touch.

White and off-white candles span the holidays and look beautiful year round.

Stock up when they go on sale, so you’ll be ready. Tie gold, yellow or brown ribbon around the base of the candles for Thanksgiving. Use thicker ribbon for tall candles.

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MYRA HARRIS

BY ANNETTE JOHNSON

NEW BO O K S H OWS H OW-TO - G E T-A- M A N M E A LS 22

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+ HER BOOK

If modern woman morés haven’t altered your thinking and you still believe – even remotely – that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, Myra C. Harris’ book, How to Get a Man: From the Kitchen, To the Bedroom, To the Ring, is just the thing for you. She includes both her favorite recipes, including Turn Off the Lights Crab Balls, and music choices to set the tone for an evening of delectable food in just the right ambiance.

In her own words, Myra tells us about the book, its origins and its potential: Q: Why did you decide to combine food with romance?

M: My book is actually a guide that will help ladies please their man. The recipes are actually a path to his heart and the fantasies help you to imagine the possibilities. When writing the book, I thought of all the great things that I like and desire when I’m with my significant other. So the book actually encompasses fantasies and recipes. In addition to that, it also gives you a selection of songs that you would like to play while you’re preparing the meal. And it gives you drink recipes as well as wine suggestions.

Of course, the funny part is you get to wear your sexy apron, stilettos, and red lipstick.

Q: So, which of your recipes is the one that really reels them in?

M: Actually, there are two. The first, I’d say, is my red velvet waffles with the chicken tenders, as well as the lobster mac and cheese.

Q: Were you able to hook a man using any of these recipes?

M: No doubt! That’s how I was able to compile the information in my head to write the book.

Q: After cooking for so long, how did you decide which recipes would go in the book?

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M: I think just over the years of cooking and just the review[s] I’ve gotten over the years. I like experimenting and I’ve just gotten to a point where I know the things that people like.

Q: Did you end up in this career by accident or is this something you knew that you were like born to do?

M: No. It was definitely an accident for me because, growing up, I didn’t want to do anything in the kitchen. When I was living in Atlanta, a gentleman that owned a restaurant ⎯ I remember him reaching out me one day ⎯ and he said, “Do you have a recipe for a pound cake?”

I was like, “No I don’t bake, but I’m sure I can ask my mom.” So I reached out to my mother, at that time, and I started baking. I really enjoyed making those cakes and then researching different flavored cakes. Then I realized, I had a passion for it. So over the years, not only did I start with making large cakes, but I even had a little baby cake business. So I make miniature cakes, they’re about 4 inches in circumference, along with [other] deserts. So not only do I cook, but I also bake. So it’s definitely been a transition for me. When I was younger, I never thought about being a baker or a cook.

Q: Do you have anything that’s quick and easy for the professional women – quick, easy, get-a-man recipes?

M: Well, it all depends on how much time that you think you have. With an hour and a half, you can definitely prepare the waffles. They don’t take very long. I didn’t want anything that was too complex for that very reason because I feared that some of the customers may or may not know how to cook. So I didn’t have anything too complex, even though some of them have quite a few ingredients. Overall, I would say that ninety percent of the recipes in the book can [be prepared] within an hour and an hour and a half timeframe.

Q: Does the book provide any other tools for busy women?

M: There may be some readers that have never had romantic evenings and maybe are not familiar with setting up the mood with some nice mellow music, candles, music in the background, and some nice chocolate-dipped strawberries. Maybe they’re not familiar with that, so it actually gives them information on how to set up a romantic evening.

Q: Do you ever give any advice in the book or is it really just about the mood and scenery?

M: It is a guide. It really is a guide that gives you recipes. Now, in terms of,

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“ALL SHE NEEDS IS A LITTLE SUPPORT” We need more than just flowers and a card on Mother’s Day. We need your support year-round!

Have a project that never quite got off the ground due to lack of funding?

Fund Her Projects (FHP) is an innovative funding platform just for women. FHP is not your typical crowdfunding site, as it allows members to promote a well-intentioned cause and request needed items within the community.

WHY FUNDHERPROJECTS.COM? • We Understand and Value You

WE EVEN SUPPORT NEEDS THAT HELP YOU SUPPORT THOSE PEOPLE AND IDEALS YOU HOLD DEAR BY OFFERING:

• We Are Community Who Cares About Your Success

• Rewards-Based Crowdfunding • Support for Meaningful Causes

• We Support Your Campaign from Start to Finish

• Virtual Baby Showers for Mothers without Means • Back-to-School Gift Registry

VISIT WWW.FUNDHERPROJECTS.COM

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Lizzie Velรกsquez D O C U M E N TA R Y R E V E A L S H E R B R AV E H E A R T 28

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but I’m able to turn a camera on and be their friend and be there for them all the time. That is really, really what keeps me going.”

When it’s time to relax, she finds respite in simply being at home alone. “I love just going back to my apartment where it’s nice and quiet. I put on my pajamas, put on a onesie, eat junk food, play with my dog and just lay in bed or on the couch for a whole day and not feel guilty about it.” She calls this routine her absolute “favorite thing to do.”

With a hectic travel schedule, she says it’s hard to keep up with her friends even when she is at home. “I love to going to dinner with them and catching up about their lives to really know what’s going on.” Always concerned about more than just herself, Lizzie laments not being able to give them one-on-one attention.

As special as she may be, she has some of the same hang-ups as the rest of modern society, namely our cellphone fixation. “I always tell myself, I’m going to turn my phone off today, and it never works. I’ve even tried giving my brother my phone to change my passcode so I can’t get in, but I just figure a way around it.” She jokes, “One day it’s gonna happen. One day, I’m gonna disconnect.”

She admits that her smartphone obsession is a fear that she might be missing something significant. She says she gets all of her news on Twitter and likes to keep up with what’s going on in the world. In addition, using her phone to send text 30

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messages or photos is the easiest way to keep up with friends and family. “It’s like a little piece of home that’s with me all the time.”

Her greatest personal challenge is going out in big crowds or public places. “The difference now when I go out is that I will see people staring at me, and I’m not really sure if they’re staring at me because they recognize me and know who I am or they’re staring at me because of how I look. And I don’t think I’ll ever not have the thought that they’re staring at me because of how I look.”

She says her self-conscious reaction is instinctive, a fear deeply entrenched since childhood. She feels like hiding at times and not wanting to be there. She describes her recent experience at an Ed Sheeran concert in Austin, Texas, where she mentally prepared herself beforehand for the gawking.

She wore a romper that exposed her legs, and the entire time she kept reassuring herself, saying, “It’s okay. You’re with your friends. Focus on having fun.”

To her surprise, within 10 minutes of being there, a line of women formed, waiting to greet, hug and take pictures with her. “It was just so, so sweet,” she recalls. She compares this crowd’s response to people’s reaction in her youth, when people would ask her parents, “Why don’t you feed your daughter?

What’s wrong with her?”

Because of people’s insensitivity, Lizzie says her parents are still protective of her even while she now lives on her own.

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LaShon Thompson’s REAL LIFE HUSTLE

BY ANNETTE JOHNSON

Up until her appearance on Bravo’s new reality TV show Mother Funders last season, most people wouldn’t recognize LaShon Thompson, the show’s bubbly Parent Teacher Organization (PTO) secretary at Bethlehem Elementary School in Locust Grove, Ga. When, however, she is mentioned in context with her famous ex-boyfriend, rapper T.I., then everyone may recognize or acknowledge her existence as the mother of their sons, Messiah and Domani Harris. Today, with a family of her own, including husband, TeShon, daughter, Ajah, and stepdaughter, Niya, she emerges with her own role and distinct tale.

What made her come from behind the scenes to do a television show?

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“This is my story, but I know so many other women have the same story, and their kids’ dads aren’t celebrities.” abuser. And my whole life growing up, that’s all I saw. Now she has to stay in a nursing home because she has an onset of dementia.”

Her mother, 65, was “vibrant” and “funny” before the stroke. “She didn’t seem her age, she didn’t act her age, and she got around fine.” LaShon says she visits her mother three to four days a week, and she takes the kids along, although not as often as she goes. “I take them down there, and we take her

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out to eat. We sit there and play bingo. We play cards with her and the other people at the nursing home.”

Needing Support

Before supporting everyone else, she had to figure out how to get support, namely for her two small children. She met Clifford Harris, Jr. when she was 12 years old, and he was 11 living in College Park, Ga. Driven and ever focused on music, he carried around notebooks full of his rhymes. She always | Se ptem ber/O c to ber 2 0 1 5 | H ER S Ma gazin e |

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GREY HAIR IS A TOP HAIR TREND FOR 2015 The most popular aspect of the grey hair trend for 2015 is because it shows just how many people are making decisions outside of the beauty box.

This type of action of embracing new trends generally drives folks to find themselves in a whole new way of looking at beauty. It causes people to reevaluate all things, from our clothing to hair colour choice. This is why trendy fashion as well as beauty continually advance.

BY ALEXANDRA MCCRAY

Grey hair was previously an unpleasant indicator of old age, however right now it appears they are in fact a popular fashionable hair trend.

Even though some people recognise the first sign of grey in their mid 20s, for other people, grey hair will not show up until they are in their 40s. Greys appear any time the hair follicle ceases to generate melanin pigments. In spite of this, the process cannot be averted.

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During the 1950’s, according to research about 7% of most women dyed their hair. These days, it is close to more than 95%. In the 1960s, the convenient, budget friendly hair dye in a container reached retail store shelves, transforming the follicle perception permanently.

The continuing assumption that guys with grey hair are professional and more knowledgeable, and women

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with grey hair are simply just old could still be a concern. We simply deceive ourselves on how youthful we appear with our dyed locks. Anne Kreamer, an American author of Going Gray is so pleased with her grey hair, nonetheless she did not show off the grey colour until she eventually left her daytime employment to start out as a business owner.

In addition young celebs who

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+ H E R FAS H I O N

Macy’s Accessories I‚Ä¢N‚Ä¢C International Concepts¬Æ $26.50

American Rag $69.50

Thalia Sodi $99.50

Bar III® $39.50

Bar III® $24.50 Thalia Sodi $26.50 Bar III® $49.50

Thalia Sodi $29.50 for set

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Bar III® $29.50 hers-magazine.com

+ H E R FAS H I O N

Macy’s Ready To Wear

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Tips to Becoming a Stylish Mompreneur

BY ANNETTE JOHNSON

Mothers who launch their own enterprises, whether for-profit or non-profit, must remember one thing: style should never be sacrificed at the cost of attaining success. In fact, style is a necessity in attracting business and maintaining balance. While the tendency is for “mompreneurs” to become lost in responsibilities, swamped in personal sacrifices, and strapped for cash flow, the need to maintain some part of you is mandatory. That one need, in our opinion, is developing or preserving your personal style. You don’t have to be a fashionista or shopaholic to stay on top of your “look.” To that end, we offer the following simple tips:

1.

Convertible Clothing The ultimate tool for maximizing wardrobe efficiency is to have an article of clothing that can easily convert to another look. You may have seen them: the blouse that can become a scarf or the scarf that can become a dress and, so forth.

They are typically very stylish, interesting, and sometimes a challenge to retool. Yes, you may have to watch a YouTube video (or two) to figure out how to restyle the multifunctional item, but it’s worth the effort.

2.

Muted Colors Whether a solid black dress or donning a color that is less intense, muted colors can be worn yearround and form the foundation of a stylish ensemble. The goal is to always find creative ways to enhance the muted foundation using some of the other tips provided. For example, you can hardly do anything to augment a dress or pants that already have glaring colors or patterns other than add darkcolored accents and accessories.

3.

Big Bags This tip is more for practical purposes than style enrichment, but carrying a big purse can also be stylish.

Mothers need room. That is a basic tenet of motherhood.

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They need space for the unexpected. Thus, the purse becomes pseudo-luggage, an alternate glove compartment, lunch box, and business card holder. The key is to ensure that the purse looks as good as it functions. Leave the small purses for afterhours outings.

4.

Two Standard Lip Colors Let’s face it: red lips never go out of style and they look good with just about every look except athletic wear. The key is to find just the right shade for you and keep it on deck. That’s not it, though. Choose something nude, a less intense color for a more natural look, which can actually complement athletic wear. Again, you’ll have to find something flattering that balances your skin tone well. The goal is to always have either of these two timeless lipstick colors available for whatever occasion may present itself, including a PTO meeting or a board meeting.

5.

Cool Cases Portable technology reigns as our means to connecting for business and personal reasons. From your cellphone to your tablet, choose a case/covering that exudes style and your personality. While you may think simple black or white cases are “safe,” they also declare that you are not a personable human being. Let your case be a conversation piece and an indication that you are interesting and approachable.

6.

Accessory Accents Whether a necklace, hat, belt, scarf, gloves or even shoes, choose something that will accent your basic outfit and encourage interest in you beyond a simple “hello.” This can include a pendant that your son made in school or a chic designer scarf. The accent can be colorful, but it must be complementary nevertheless. Make sure the accessory doesn’t necessarily add more of the same color, but just the right contrast, in some cases.

7.

A-Line Skirt This is one article of clothing that every busy-ness woman must possess in some form or fashion, literally. A timeless style for women, an A-line skirt is the equivalent of having a good pair of jeans.

Like jeans, you can dress these skirts up or down. Depending on your top, they can look casual, business or formal. No need to sell you any further, just make sure you have two or three of these skirts ready for whatever you take on in your typical mompreneur day. You may want to have different shoes and tops on hand in case you want to change your look during a particular day. It’s that easy to change your style and keep your skirt.

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STRAIGHT OUTTA

COMPETITION:

RONDA ROUSEY

BY RICA WIERSEMA

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e live in an era where the word “impossible” is being used less and less with every coming day.

Equal rights between people of all kinds have been demanded, then fought for, and in many cases, won. In fact, there is really only one form of segregation still standing in most of the world today, and that is the boundary that exists between the sexes.

With the exception of the department store Target, which has foregone genderspecific labels on their clothing lines (to the confusion of some customers and the appreciation of others), most public organizations have opted to keep men and women separated when it comes to things like merchandise, restrooms… and sports.

That is, until recently, when prominent female athletes like Ronda Rousey have expressed willingness — even eagerness — to compete with their male counterparts.

After notable male boxer Floyd “Money” Mayweather Jr. admitted in 2014 that he had no idea who Rousey was, the female Mixed-Martial Arts champion publicly announced that she thought herself capable of defeating him in a no-holds-barred brawl.

“Floyd is one of the best boxers of all time. He would definitely beat me in a boxing match… Boxing is a sweet science with strict rules,” she told a fan on Reddit during an ‘Ask Me Anything,’ session. But what if those rules weren’t present? Then, Rousey said, she would be able to ”beat anyone on this planet.” One of Rousey’s former opponents, Miesha Tate, agreed with the statement and added that, without the etiquette of boxing holding her back, Rousey would definitely “arm bar the hell out of [Mayweather].”

While there are a lot of technicalities that might keep Rousey and Mayweather from ever meeting in the ring, Rousey’s repeated victories over all her female opponents is, according to many MMA fans, “just getting old.” Rousey has been beating out every single female opponent that she’s come in contact with — not just MMA fighters, but hers-magazine.com

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also wrestlers and boxers. In fact, she has done so with such ease that some fans have started requesting that she compete against fighters from the next weight class just keep herself challenged. It’s not a stretch to imagine that Rousey could actually end up facing some lightweight male opponents in the next few years.

As revolutionary as that would be, Rousey would not be the first woman to compete on a co-ed playing field. Female boxer Jackie Tonawanda actually went to court in order to win the right for women to box in 1975, and she then kicked off her career by kicking out her male opponent, Larry Rodania. There are a few other notable female athletes who have achieved major victories, like tennis player Billy Jean King, and baseball pitcher Jackie Mitchell (who actually struck out both Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig back to back).

However, on the whole, men and women have competed separately in the world of athletics for one simple reason: women like Rousey and Tonawanda are few and far between. History has shown that, while women have certainly gained prominence in athletics over the years, they have yet to match their male competitors in many ways — including financially. When Rousey beat out Mayweather for the ESPY award for Best Fighter, Mayweather merely responded by holding his excessive pay grade over her head: particularly, his recent bout against Manny Pacquiao that was deemed the highest-earning boxing match of all time.

While Mayweather’s gloat about money may not seem like a strong comeback in the face of Rousey’s determination, it was still an unfortunate reminder of the massive gap between the earnings of male and female athletes in modern society.

From the octagonal arenas of MMA fighting to the scandals surrounding the treatment of female soccer players in the 2015 FIFA Women’s World Cup, it would seem that the physical gap separating the genders may not be easily closed until the financial gap between them is reduced.

And money isn’t the only factor keeping men and women apart in competitions.

While many sports do favor finesse over brute strength, the fact remains that each gender has its own physical makeup that differs from the other. Because of that, a lot of female records in athletics simply aren’t equal with their male counterparts — at least, not yet. The fastest woman in the world (Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce of Jamaica) is still behind Usain Bolt by 1.01 seconds, and the strongest man in the world (Hossein Rezazadeh of Iran) can lift 124 pounds more than Russian weightlifter Tatiana Kashirina.

Even with the LGBT community gaining public support in various parts of society, gender identity in athletes is actually making physical competition more complicated rather than melded.

Last year after MMA fighter Fallon Fox overpowered opponent Tamikka Brents in the ring and gave her a concussion and broken eye socket, it was revealed that Fox had actually undergone transgender surgery to become a woman and was originally born male. Brent recalled Fox as the most overpowering opponent that she had ever faced, and expressed uncertainty about whether it’s fair for Fox to compete against women in the ring. Despite all of her remarks about fighting Mayweather, Ronda Rousey admitted that Fox probably shouldn’t be fighting in the female category because going through puberty as a man is “something you can’t really reverse.”

So, is co-ed competition looming in the future of athletics? At least in the world of combat sports, it would seem that that day is still far in the future. At the moment, the only victory that Rousey may ever see over Mayweather is in the competition to win the ESPY award for Best Fighter: the day that she publicly referred to as the day that Floyd Mayweather had finally been “[beaten] by a woman for once.”

However, if Rousey keeps it up, maybe she and her peers might get their chance to face male athletes one day.

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WOND

LAN PROVES MAKES THE| DREAM WORK ON THE EEPHUS TOUR M a gazine | Se ptember/O c tob er 2015 58 | HERSTEAMWORK hers-magazine.com

BY BRITNEY HARDWEARE

W

ondaland Records’ use of the baseball term “Eephus” (meaning a game-changing pitch) in their album and tour title could not have been more prophetic of their talent, confidence and charisma as the The Eephus Tour came to a close on Aug. 31.

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Their appeal lured flocks of Atlanta AfroPunkers, cubicle dwellers in pencil skirts and heels, and college students, who came to strut their stuff – which began in a line wrapped around Luckie Street to the SkyView Ferris Wheel in anticipation of Janelle Monae and her Wondaland crew. Onlookers surely must have asked, Is this all really worth the two- or three-hour wait?

The answer proved to be a resounding “yes” as the Tabernacle burst at the seams with anxious fans rushing to find sitting or standing room. It seemed that everyone who put his or her email into the concert’s lottery pool was ultimately selected to attend Monae’s secret pop-up tour’s last show.

The Kansas native laid musical roots in Atlanta, collaborating with Big Boi and other native talents. But these roots finally grew into a strong family tree with the birth of her label, Wondaland Records.

With the assistance of Big Boi and in partnership with Epic Records, the label has borne the fruitful talents of artists Jidenna, Deep Cotton, St. Beauty, and Roman GianArthur. Sharing those talents with the nation on The Eephus Tour, it is only fitting to end the tour at the Tabernacle in Atlanta.

Cannons of white confetti exploded into the crowd and the entire band swayed about-faced to the beat of the drums. Roman GianArthur finally turned around and removed a “NIGGA”-labeled blackface mask to reveal a gilded grin. He and Monae growled out a bopping rendition of Prince’s “Lets Go Crazy,” giving an electric start to the show.

Collaboration continued to be a theme for the show. St. Beauty (Alex Belle and Isis Valentino) and GianArthur slayed with a soulful cover of Sheryl Crow’s “Strong Enough” that featured bleeding-heart vocals from Belle and eerily beautiful harmonies from Valentino and GianArthur. GianArthur served a spicy Motown-inspired,

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Things Women Find Most Annoying about Men WRITTEN BY TAMARA KING

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H E R S P O L L R E S U LTS +

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rAre men really that annoying? I think by now both men and women have come to the realization that we are from different planets in the same galaxy. Nowhere can this be witnesses more readily than in relationships. Men and women in relationships have their own way of doing things, especially communicating. Ladies, we may never truly understand how men operate, and men may never understand what women really want. Just as much as men can nitpick about women being nagging, women can counter that with their assertion of men being annoying.

We surveyed women and asked them what they thought was most annoying about men. Hopefully, men will see these results and possibly make an effort to do a little better. Meanwhile, here are the results: What do you find most annoying that men do?

Adjusting their privates, leaving the toilet seat up, constantly staring at women, and expecting the woman to pay all tied at 17%. But the most annoying thing that women think that men do is: they don’t listen (33%). We know the importance of communicating in a relationship, but just as much as we speak, we must listen to each other as well.

What do you find most annoying when you first meet a man?

Not having much of a conversation (31%) and constantly talking about sex (46%) were two top things that women found most annoying. If you can’t hold a decent conversation, that’s an automatic no first or second date. There has to be something more on the table besides good looks, nice teeth, and clean shoes. If sex is the hers-magazine.com

only topic you can think of to discuss, then there’s nothing to talk about. There are other topics to talk about when first meeting like the weather, leisure activities, hometown, etc.

What’s the best approach to tell a man he’s being annoying?

This one had no competition! 62% of women said that they would tell a man right as he’s doing it. Can you say, hold no punches? You can’t let some things linger.

And if someone is annoying you, it’s best that you tell them right then and there so they can hopefully correct it. We all want to be treated with respect and the best way to teach someone how to treat you is to show them, and in this case, tell them.

What are some annoying things men do after you break up?

Telling everyone that you two were only “friends” or something of that nature to downplay their involvement (33%) was the second most popular response. Keep declaring their love but continuing to do something that makes you question if they ever loved you (42%) was what women voted as the most annoying. Each party should be “grown-up” enough to acknowledge the relationship for what it was and move on without hitting below the belt. Saying one thing and your actions showing another is more than annoying; it’s frustrating, especially when it involves someone you care about.

If we could all just get along, communicate openly, listen attentively, and put the shoe on other other foot sometimes, it would be sweet icing on the cake. Yes, men and women are wired differently, but we can all agree that we want respect, to gain more understanding, and ultimately experience more loving relationships.

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AH. . .

BY PEGGY HATTENDORF

A U T U M N – T H E P E R F E C T T I M E T O T R AV E L With a kaleidoscope of colors - bright reds and maroons, burnt oranges and yellows, mahoganies and browns - fall previews in vibrant hues with the changing colors of the leaves. Smells of cinnamon, spices, and cloves fill the crisp air. We wake to misty mornings and the sound of rustling leaves with the wind blowing through the trees. With cooler temperatures, we reach for oversized sweaters or cardigans, jeans and boots. Shorter days bring cozy nights as we settle in around a fire with a blanket, a good book, hot cider or a glass of wine.

Bales of hay, apple orchards, scarecrows, corn mazes, ripe vineyards, pumpkin patches and farmers markets are

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treasures of the rural landscape. Autumn is a feast for the senses and the perfect time of the year for travel.

Fall trips are charged with eye-popping colors, breathtaking vistas, quaint towns and picturesque villages offering charming inns with candles in the windows, bowls of apples on the front desk and the smells of roasted chestnuts and pumpkin pies.

A little planning will help you see autumn at her “regal” best. The following is a collection of unique, interesting and seasonal attractions to design a memorable fall getaway.

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395. Autumn days are sunny and warm with mild evenings. On your drive expect to see Cottonwood trees in the Owens Valley and Aspens in the high country. In the higher elevations of Bishop Creek Canyon, the leaves start to turn in early September.

The Agawa Canyon in Ontario, Canada is in the Canadian or Pre-Cambrian Shield, the oldest mountain range in the world.

To fully experience this wonder, set off from Sault Ste. Marie on a train tour – Agawa Canyon Train Vacations - which covers a diverse area of hardwood forests parading brilliant colors of red, purple, gold and yellow in the fall. A one-day wilderness train excursion travels 114 miles north of Sault Ste. Marie over towering trestles, by pristine lakes and rivers and around amazing granite rock formations of the lower Canadian Shield. accommodations. The quaint town of Kent and the storybook village center of West Cornwall, with its famous classic red covered bridge, present true New England charm. The central Berkshires of Western Massachusetts offer a wonderland of fall foliage. This loop adventure starts and ends in Pittsfield.

Departing the town, locate Route 41 and head to the town of Richmond, Mass. with its white clapboard homes. Allow time for stops in Stockbridge with a visit to the Norman Rockwell Museum along with the charming town of Lenox. Maine along, Route 17, offers the explorer beautiful mountain vistas, lakes, ponds, rivers and streams. On a clear day, looking west you may see New Hampshire and Canada. In Oquossoc, where Route 17 and Route 4 intersect you’ll see displays of pumpkins, chrysanthemums, and places to buy apple cider. The town of Rangeley on Route 4 has restaurants, inns and cute shops. Route 112 winds across the state of New Hampshire connecting Bath to Conway through the White Mountain National Forest.

It’s called the Kancamagus Highway as the road cuts through the White Mountains. This is an area known for its spectacular fall foliage in brilliant shades of crimson and gold. The historic town of Bath with its covered bridge, Lincoln —the second largest town in New Hampshire, as well as villages of Conway all deserve time for sightseeing, shopping, dining or overnight stays. Although tiny, Rhode Island packs plenty of punch with vibrant fall colors.

For the most dramatic leaf-peeping, head to the rural northern and western towns through Rolling Meadows, dotted with apple orchards and pumpkin patches along with dense forests. The tiny hamlet of Chepachet on US 44 is a perfect place to stop for lunch or stretch your legs and walk the quaint village. Vermont boasts the highest percentage of maple trees in all of New England.

Route 100 is considered one of the most beautiful drives in the state and Stowe through Waterbury offers picture postcard beauty.

Besides, who can pass up a chance to visit the Ben & Jerry’s Ice cream factory in Waterbury?

The trees are ablaze in brilliant colors of orange, yellow, gold and crimson in Bishop, Calif. Located in the middle of the state, the city is at the crossroads of Highway 6 and Interstate hers-magazine.com

Pitlochry, Scotland is known as “Big Tree Country” and is famous for its fall foliage shows in a myriad of colors from bronze, crimson, yellow and bright orange. The town also features a prominent festival called The Enchanted Forest, Scotland’s award winning light and sound show in the mystical Faskally Woods. Loch Faskally, a man-made reservoir surrounded by steep wooded hills north of Pitlochry, provides good walking areas with chances to see salmon leaping up the fish ladder in the reservoir.

The garden region of France, The Loire Valley, provides both ambiance and mild fall temperatures, perfect for viewing the stunning scenery. The area is known for its delectable wines, impressive chateaux, perfectly manicured gardens and fertile landscapes. With its New England quality of fall foliage, it’s considered France’s Hudson Valley.

So this autumn, let’s fall for fairs, festivals and foliage. Enjoy the pleasures of combing the fairgrounds to find a prized antique or perfect treasure, relish the family fun at a country harvest festival, and be awe-struck at the sheer beauty of the colorful trees and forests - happy leaf-peeping.

Hers Magazine Travel Editor, Peggy Hattendorf, is a Los Angeles based travel writer, blogger and novelist. With a professional travel industry career spanning 25 years, she owned several travel management companies. This led to building and managing a premier travel agent network and co-founding a nationwide marketing consortium with more than 5000 members.

Her background with upscale and luxury travel and products, served as cornerstones in the character development and storyline of her first novel “Son of my Father – A Family Dynasty.” She is currently working on a sequel.

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+ HER MUSIC

THE EVOLUTION OF MO Monifah Touches on Her Reunion to Herself, Family and Music

BY KYREE SHOCKLEY

S

inger-songwriter, Monifah Carter, has been making headlines ever since she re-emerged on TV One’s franchise reality show R&B Divas.

The last we saw of the Touch It songstress was during the season three finale of R&B Divas: Atlanta when she debuted her wedding last June. With a year of marriage under her belt and a newly released single, many are wondering how married life is going and what the future holds for the songbird.

“Married life is good. It’s work and it’s fun. The partnership of it has been a really good experience for me,” Monifah said. Though some experts state that the first year of marriage is one of the toughest on a couple, Monifah and her partner, Terez, seem to be transitioning well.

“We still talk like we just started dating,” said Monifah. “We’re friends, so it’s just growing. It’s taking different shapes and levels. I can’t say that much has changed, it’s just strengthened. It’s a little more routine, but I appreciate that in my life. You just have to keep it interesting and fun.”

Last year, Monifah and Terez made history when their wedding aired on June 25, 2014, being the first African-American lesbian wedding ever televised.

A year after the debut, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of gay marriage, legalizing it all over the U.S. With both moments being groundbreaking for the

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LGBTQ community, Monifah felt it was all in divine order.

“It’s divine. I didn’t even associate the two dates until just now, but that’s awesome. It’s high time that people are all afforded the same rights to marry who we want to spend our life with and be covered under the same judicial laws and rights. It’s the same partnership. You’re investing your time, money, and energy, so why can’t we be protected under those laws? It was unfair judicially, but it’s great that we’ve progressed.”

After an abusive heterosexual relationship in her teen years, Monifah made a conscious decision to date women. Since then, she says she has experienced adversity being in a same-sex relationship, especially as an African-American woman. Through backlash from family and friends and, sometimes, being judged in the music industry for her sexual preference, Monifah has never regretted her choice to date women.

“That would be denying who I am as a person and the things that I’ve experienced. I’m very comfortable. So, no, I don’t regret exploring my attraction to women and finding that I’m emotionally more attracted to them. I know that in my own community of people and in this business: there is a lot of prejudice and slighting. I feel it and I see it, but I won’t let it affect me in that way. I just won’t do it. I just keep pushing.”

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“Quite honestly, what else what were we gonna do? We could have done other stuff but it didn’t seem like that was the direction they were going to allow things to go.”

With the transparency of her relationship combined with her sassy, assertive attitude, Monifah is now looked at as an LGBTQ activist, more specifically as it relates to the three strikes she lives with: being black, female and gay. “It’s very different between whites and blacks in the LGBTQ community. I’m like a triple negative. I am a same-gender loving woman and I’m black. I’m that every day. So I think, in my daily walk, I am an activist.”

With religion being a huge component in the black community, homosexuality is less accepted because it is seen as unnatural, sinful, and an abomination against God. Monifah thinks that because of this, it’s not only harder to accept gay people within the community, but it also stifles the growth and unification of the community. “We need to re-evaluate our faith. We need to re-evaluate what we believe in and why, and not just because momma did. But really ask some questions 74

and stop being sheep. We need to step outside our comfort zone, have some real conversations, and stop thinking we know every goddamn thing. Get uncomfortable so we can have some dialogue and figure some things out together.”

Mother-Daughter Moments and Memories

With Monifah being openly in what she likes to call a “same-sex loving relationship,” talks of her own family’s acceptance are frequently questioned.

Many who were fans of R&B Divas: Atlanta know that Monifah’s daughter, Akemi Carter Lopez, disapproves of her mother’s relationship due to her religious beliefs and, because of that, was not present for Monifah’s wedding. Though on camera, it appeared as if the tension between mother and daughter was based on Monifah’s lifestyle, she reveals that there were deeper issues separate from her sexuality, most of which stemmed

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from Akemi’s childhood, which needed to be resolved.

“We are fine. We never were unfine.

We were just healing our relationship due to past stuff that I knew I participated in and didn’t show up for as her mom. I admitted those things and that was my job as a mother and a parent to say ‘Hey I know I wasn’t there for you in this way, but how can I fix it?’”

Since the wedding, Monifah shares that she and Akemi have come to a level of acceptance when it comes to her sexual orientation and are in the process of healing old wounds. “We share the differences of our beliefs. We got through that with love and respect. She’s still daughter and I’m still mom…. We’re healing and we both are committed to making it the best relationship it could be.”

Monifah is now a proud “glam mom” of a healthy baby boy who she says she video chats every week since Akemi and her family live far away. With Akemi hers-magazine.com

+ HER FOOD

BOWLING FOR food

BY ANNETTE JOHNSON

Food is something that Malika Bowling takes seriously. She is the author of “Food Lovers’ Guide to Atlanta,” “Food Blogging 101” and the founder of Atlanta Restaurant Blog. Malika has also served as a judge at various culinary competitions and food festivals, including Taste of Atlanta.

I

n 2009, the 38-year-old formed the Association of Food Bloggers, a nonprofit organization.

She started the association because there were so many people who were starting food blogs but for all the wrong reasons. “I think they started it because they just saw that there is a lot of free stuff, free meals you get from blogging. That’s not the reason you start a blog. There were lots of people who just didn’t have ethics around it. I wanted to start an organization that said, ‘Here are the ethics to follow.

Here’s the guideline to starting a blog. They didn’t know what they were doing.”

In general, she felt that people needed guidance in starting a food blog, but she also wanted to see bloggers establish a profitable business. “I’m really passionate about my own blog that I started seven years ago, and I really want bloggers to be successful, not only because I’m passionate about food, but I’m also passionate about explaining to other people how they can build their own business, and build a career and a brand for themselves.”

She has become a mentor, as well as a referral source for companies looking to do business with “reputable” food bloggers. Because of her role in the association, she was subsequently offered the opportunity to author her first book titled “Food Lovers’ Guide to Atlanta.”

Surely, some may think that food tasting could become monotonous in the same city, such as Atlanta, but Malika assures otherwise. “There is just something different to try all the time. It’s very rare that I end up going to the same restaurant twice.”

Meanwhile, she says she cooks at home about twice per week. Although she is from India, she doesn’t prepare native dishes because a family from Guyana adopted her from an orphanage as a small child. “The Guyanese food that I’m used to is pretty different from traditional Indian cooking. As a kid growing up,” she continues, “I had a lot of aunties that cooked great Guyanese dishes for us, so unfortunately, I didn’t learn to cook them. I wish I had because I crave that food all the time.” In fact, she bemoans the fact that there are no Guyanese restaurants in Atlanta, so she says she doesn’t get to eat that food very often.

Eating and a Balanced Life Besides running the association and being a freelance writer to publications like USA Today, she provides various marketing services to small businesses. “I work a lot, but I do like what I do,” she asserts. To get a mental break from work, she says she goes to the gym three to four times per week, and she meditates.

She left the corporate world several years ago, and says she has no regrets about making the decision to become a food blogger. Popular bloggers are typically invited to try the food at restaurants. Malika says she never asks to review a restaurant.

“If they want me, they’ll ask me.”

She has a lot of friends and family who envy her role as a restaurant reviewer, thinking all she does is show up and get a good meal. “People don’t understand how much work goes into putting a good review together. Anybody can take pictures and put a couple of paragraphs on a blog, but I take pride in my work and what I do. It takes me a long time to write a good review. I go through and edit all my pictures.” Described as a “fantastic photographer,” her husband often accompanies her hers-magazine.com

to take pictures, which can be seen on her blog.

Ever the optimistic, Malika can usually always find something positive to say about a restaurant in her dining reviews. “Usually, it’s not that everything is horrible.” If everything is bad about the meal, and that’s happened a handful of times, she tells the publicist or rep, “Look, this was really bad. I can’t find anything good to say about this. I will still write this review, but I’m going to write it honestly. Do you want me to say all of this stuff? If they say ‘no, don’t write the review,’ I just won’t write anything.”

She wants to publish honest food reviews because she wants to maintain integrity with the readers. “Because if you don’t have your readership and you’re not honest with them, you don’t have anything. If people are not coming to your site to read your blog, you won’t have advertising opportunities and you won’t be invited back to restaurants. It’s a delicate balance.

You want to keep the restaurants happy, but you need to be honest to keep the readers happy as well.”

While she enjoys cooking to a certain degree, she has no intention of becoming a restaurant owner. “I understand that it’s really, really hard work to run a restaurant, and that’s some people’s dream, just like what I do is my dream… I don’t want to go tearing them apart, but I do want to be honest. I don’t want people to spend their hard-earned money at a restaurant, and the food is bad.”

Beyond Food In an effort to give back to her native land, she has decided to start a charity, Mardai Harricharan Foundation, for orphans in India. “There are so many children in India living in poverty, and they don’t have nearly the opportunities that I’ve had.”

She journeyed back to India last November along with her father and brother, who was also adopted from an orphanage in India. She beams while sharing, “We were actually able to work with an orphanage over there and give them some money.”

They are in the process of starting a nonprofit to provide greater educational opportunities. “Education is the only way to overcome the poverty over there,” she explains. With 40 percent of the population living in poverty, according to Malika, she says, “If I can even have a small impact on that, I’ll feel like I’ve done something good.”

She also wants to expand upon what she is already doing professionally. “I would love to have a TV show, and I would love one that had a lot of travel in it.” To that end, she has added a travel section to her popular blog.

“I’d like to do more,” says Malika, who is looking forward to expanding her brand in order to help her readers and native country.

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The obvious one is that they don’t believe the child is theirs. However, in many of those instances, after asking them a series of questions, it’s obvious that the majority of them could potentially be the father. But they are in denial.

A DAY IN TV’S ‘PATERNITY COURT’ RESOLVES REALLIFE QUESTIONS

BY TAMARA KING

C

ourt TV shows with heavygaveled judges can be addictive, as evidenced by Judge Judy, which has been on the air for almost 20 years. More recent shows such as “Paternity Court” do not deviate one bit with its hard-hitting Judge Lauren Lake.

Hers magazine had a chance to go behindthe-scenes for a live taping as a part of the show’s studio audience.

The set, housed by the Georgia Public Broadcasting building, is actually a mock up of a courtroom instead of a real one.

Make no mistake, though, everything after this was the real deal.

The plaintiff and the defendant both came into the courtroom first. Next, the bailiff yelled “all rise” to indicate the entrance of the judge and for the studio audience to stand. The poised, petite, and confident Lake entered the room and took her place on the bench. Lake, a Detroit native and Atlanta resident, is also a legal and relationship expert who graduated with a law degree from Wayne State University.

In the case that the audience observed, a man was questioning the paternity hers-magazine.com

of his daughter with his ex-girlfriend.

The defendant, despite her questionable rebuttals, was sure that the plaintiff was her child’s father. The volleying of words was overwhelming; it’s impressive how well Lake kept up with statements during the episode.

After hearing both sides and reviewing evidence, Lake was ready to deliver the DNA results. The episode aired on September 21st as a part of their Season 3 premiere, so the results will have to be a surprise. After the results were announced, Lake provided tear-jerking comfort in her words and advice to both the plaintiff and defendant.

After recovering from the emotional episode, Hers snapped selfies and complimented outfits with the beautiful, bubbly Lauren Lake. She was also gracious enough sit down and answer a few questions for our readers. Here’s what she had to say: Q: What is the main reason men challenge the paternity of a child?

L: There are various reasons that a man will challenge the paternity of the child.

Q: Has being the judge of “Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court” made you more compassionate toward fathers or just the opposite?

L: In my courtroom, I see so many men come to court hoping to be the father. Even when the results prove they aren’t the dad, it’s uplifting to see a man still commit to being a part of the child’s life regardless of the results.

Q: Do you ever personally follow-up with cases?

L: All the time! There have been so many instances where I ask one of the producers how a certain family is doing. We give them a call to check in on their progress.

We truly care about these families and their futures. We have a licensed therapist on site [who] provides guests with counseling after court and resources in their home state to continue the healing process.

Q: What can women learn from watching the show?

L: Often times, I say that the show could be called “Maternity Court” because I’ve found that many of the paternity cases are the result of the mother’s poor choices.

I want women to make smarter choices and realize that they don’t need to give themselves away, but instead empower themselves to know their potential and their worth.

Q: What is your advice to women who are facing paternity issues?

L: Resolving the issue sooner than later is best for you, the potential father, and especially the child. I see so many adults come to court and wish their mother would have taken the necessary steps to resolve this issue when they were [children] instead of growing up with doubts and confusion.

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