ISLAND ETIQUETTE
Courtesies & Manners This candid guide may save you from embarrassment and a surprise or two
DO try to appreciate that, while Bermudians are generally welcoming folk who understand they need help to run the island’s sophisticated economy, they get somewhat ticklish when they suspect someone is being brought in to change the proverbial lightbulb (even if the truth is more complicated), or suspect that your job could easily be done by a Bermudian. Be straightforward, low-key and ready to laugh at your own expense and you’ll have no problem. DON’T burst a blood vessel if that package that you’re used to getting from Amazon overnight, takes four or five days to reach you in Bermuda. Some things just take a little longer living on an island. DO be prepared for some ‘gossipy’ dinner table talk here. A local politician’s insignificant blunder is likely to get half an hour of animated banter, while the latest New Resident 2022
global disaster is dismissed with a distracted “Sad…”
DON’T gossip about one local to another. Invariably, the subject turns out to be your interlocutor’s cousin/ neighbour/ex-spouse — you get the idea. The key concept to remember: everyone you meet is probably related and slated to talk soon. DO be patient if you make a social arrangement with a Bermudian and he or she shows up 20 minutes late. It’s a kind of custom here — infuriating to outsiders until they wise up to ‘Bermuda time’. You should, of course, always show up to business meetings on time.
DO expect waiters or shop assistants to provide friendly and helpful service. But don’t expect them to over-indulge you with formal respect. Things are a little more relaxed here. DO say “Good Morning”, “Good
Afternoon” or whatever is appropriate when you greet a Bermudian. Failure to do so will severely impede your chances of ever getting anything to eat, purchasing products, or making a cab move in a forward direction. In short, being nice is a necessity here. Sorry.
DON’T be shocked to hear the mild-mannered local banker or lawyer you know as, say, Fred Smith, being referred to by colleagues as perhaps “Big Meat” or “Flea” or even “Sledgehammer.” Nicknames are a Bermudian thing; just look in the Obituaries column of the Royal Gazette each day to see some wonderful examples. DO plan to eat out before 10pm unless you want fry-shaped solidified grease from some late, late take-out. Bermudians generally eat around 7:30pm to 8:30pm and there’s precious few eating establishments open late. 19