Creating Power Couples Laurie H Davis

CREATING POWER COUPLES

Copyright Laurie Davis

It was a cold frosty day on January 11, 1992 when I met the man who would become my power partner. I had been home at Christmas to visit my parents and told them I was done, and I would NEVER have another man in my life. I was emotionally and financially bankrupt from being in relationships that either failed or they left or broke my heart all in one smack. But as the old saying goes, never say NEVER. That will come back to haunt you.

I worked with Ron’s daughter at the time and she came in to work one day all mad and emotional. I asked what happened? She shared her parents were separated after 26 years, Dad had moved out and she did not think he would ever date anyone or meet anyone. Myself, having given up on men said to her “I know a lot of women I can introduce your father to if he is interested.” She gave me his number and I invited him to come along with a group of us girls on the upcoming Saturday afternoon to listen to some bands and enjoy some beverages.

This fine gent arrived at my door with a dozen pink carnations, my favorite flower in the whole wide world. How did he know that? He was tall, silver hair, very good looking, drove a Ford F150 truck, slim blue jeans a leather jacket and to top it all off he wore some fancy cowboy boots. I thought he was from the west or Arizona perhaps. But no, he was born and raised on a farm in the east coast. My thoughts right at that moment were, skip those friends because I am going to keep you Ron Davis for myself. He still reminds me 28 years later he is waiting to meet those women.. said at Christmas and bragged up why I was stepping into another relationship. By the way my parents kept that letter and when my Dad passed in May of 2016 my Mom handed the letter back to me saying that Dad got a chuckle out of it each time he read it. Dad liked Ron right off the bat, and the day we married my Dad walked me down the aisle for the third and last time in an effort to give me away.

So we began our journey. It all happened very quickly. Three dates and he moved in with me, gave up his apartment and we have been together ever since. So ladies never give up hope because when it is the right one time is of no concern.

So why does it work so well? Ron is an introvert. I am an extrovert. Ron is mechanical, methodical a perfectionist. I am creative and wild and all over the place. His office picture perfect mine piled high with paper. I like classical music he likes country. He likes the outdoors, hunting fishing etc. and I like my quiet chaise lounge and a good book or movie. Opposites attract but it does not always work out. More important then these outside pieces are the inside pieces. We possess exactly the same core values as the other. Values like honesty, integrity, morals, we share family values. Plus the importance of staying healthy we practice daily and it has all contributed to our success.

Has it been easy? No it has not. We have had many large obstacles to overcome but have conquered them all. Family not wanting me in his life, death of loved ones, grandchildren being born on both ends of this big country, sick -very sick daughter who is well

today, financial and legal struggles, building a business from scratch, multiple moves, nasty court case. Ron had a massive stroke 8 years ago, now fully recovered as I chose to rehab him myself, and so much more I could write about.

My experiences however led me to create a document and ultimately a workshop called Creating Power Couples. In this process I show couples how they can conquer whatever has come between them. Let’s focus on the strengths like Ron and I did. Happy parents = happy children and so it is not always just about us.

To become a Power Couple, here are some suggestions.

Become an effective communicator as men and women communicate differently. When I met Ron he had completely shut down. He had been married for 26 years and in that process lost his voice and ability to speak up for himself. Happens a lot on both sides of the fence.

Never go to bed angry. We have all heard that one. In our 28 years I have slept in the guest room on two occasions and each time Ron came to rescue me.

Date night once a week is imperative. No kids, no phones, no TV just you and me babe. We make a special meal together and enjoy happy hour and talk until the wee hours of the morning.

Have fun and maintain a sense of humor. Find out what each other likes to do and participate even if we are not excited about it. I do not like watching TV unless it is a good movie and Ron can watch five episodes back to back of a man show. He joins me for the chick flicks and I join him for the manly stuff.

Be supportive always. I may not always agree on Ron’s ideas but he has my full support and the same works this way also. He does not enjoy large gatherings and I love them so he has supported that over the years so I don’t go alone.

Sex, great sex, physical affection, romance and intimacy can hold the most difficult of relationships together. We can solve a lot of problems under the sheets. This is an area no one wants to discuss but we know what each other’s needs what are we like what we don’t like. This is a huge barrier in a lot of relationships so talking about it solves much.

Family time and taking time for the children, the grandchildren, parents and siblings has always been a huge role we have played. However we live far enough away that we were never taken advantage of or allowed the family to interfere in our relationship. So balance is key here. We are still a couple and if we stay strong for each other we can be strong for our family when they need us.

Maintaining peace and harmony in the home has been a priority for us particularly since Ron had his stroke. Simplifying life and enjoying the peace and quiet of our home and yard, breathing that cool mountain air off the Rockies, and living near the water has been essential for our health and wellness.

Have the security and trust in self to allow the other person to

be who they are and supporting their dreams and goals even though they differ. Ron and I have always been very good about that. Take for example last summer I left him and “Pride,” our dog to visit my first home and spend my 70 th birthday with my Mom. I was gone for five weeks. That’s what I am talking about here.

Retain a sense of adventure. In 1992 Ron and I jumped on his motorcycle (a touring bike) a Honda Gold Wing and left the east coast and travelled 6000 miles to the west coast across Canada and parts of the US to get there. We made a decision to relocate all the way across the country 11 years ago to support Ron’s daughter and her family. We have always had the “feistiness” to go for the gusto. Keeping that alive in a relationship keeps it adventuresome.

These experiences are steps we have taken to become a Power Couple. I have not even written yet about how together we built an amazing business working side by side for 28 years. So if there is trouble in Paradise it can be resolved with the proper tools and mentorship. As long as the foundation of love and trust is firmly in place, it is easy breezy lemon squeezy. My parents were married for 67 years. Was it perfect? Heck no but it made great mentoring for what to do and what not to do. Sometimes I listened and sometimes I did not. Like everyone else we want to do life the hard way. My final words are risk throwing your heart over the fence just one more time with your existing partner or look to find a new love only this time do it differently. - Laurie Davis

Laurie H Davis Director of Training and Development Twelve online Workshops www.lauriehdavis.com laurie@BigMediaUSA.com 780 566 2340

Laurie H Davis

Laurie Davis is a retired teacher and school administrator having served 15 years in the public school system. In 1984 she retired to pursue her entrepreneurial goals and dreams. One of those dreams was to do school her way. www.lauriehdavis.com This year 2020 marks her 50th year teaching, training, facilitating and mentoring others. In 1992 along with the support of her husband Ron they opened their doors for business. Starting with 10 workshops that Laurie created, they began a journey that would be full of setbacks, surprises, failures, successes and growth. However as Laurie says, “We would not have had it any other way for all that we have learned.” To date she now has literally authored and created hundreds of workshops, and certifies others to deliver her programs. She has provided extensive services also to our Aboriginal Communities across Canada and in the USA. Laurie has been published in countless articles and featured in a documentary film on Gratitude. She facilitates workshops, online and in person. You can contact Laurie directly at: www.selfworththemissinglink.com

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