MA-577-2013 Editor: Diane Hamer
Introduction
Hola Everyone, Now that the school summer holidays are over, September and most of the fiestas have been and gone we can hopefully get back to normal working hours for a few months at least and embrace the cooler weather. Take your time to soak up & enjoy the news & information in this edition. Thank you to all contributors of advertisements, articles & stories, and please get in touch with us if you have any news items that you think our readers will enjoy. Don't forget that the Inland Solutions magazine is available on line at: Web: www.inlandsolutions.es Facebook page: www.facebook.com/InlandSolutionsMagazine E-mail: info@inlandsolutions.es Save euros with Smart Advertising Prices, Tel enquiries: 659991743 every 2 months including IVA for only: We look forward to hearing from you. Classified Ad - 5€ = 2,50€ per month , Small Ad - 30€ = 15€ per month, Quarter page 50€ = 25€ per month, Take care Hasta la proxima Half page 75€ = 37,50€ per month Full page 140€ = 70€ per month
Diane
Diana
Useful Phone Numbers & Information Emergency Police 091 Emergency Medical 061 Emergency Operator 112 Fire Brigade (Bomberos) 080 Crime Report 902 102 112 British Consulate, C/Mauricio Moro Pareto 2-2. Malaga 902 109 356 24hr Medical Centre, Mollina 952740250 Alcoholics Anonymous Helpline 600379110 Airports Malaga 952 048 804 (For english press 9) Sevilla 954 449 000 Granada 58 245 200 Jerez 956 150 000 Gibralter 0035 022 073 026 Autobuses Casado: 952841957 Trains: http://www.renfe.com/ 2
Deposito Legal: MA-577-2013 Copyright ©2013 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be used or reproduced without prior written approval by the owner. For further information, please email info@inlandsolutions.es All articles, editorials and advertisements are published in good faith, for informational purposes and are in no way a substitute for legal advice. Inland Solutions Magazine does not accept responsibility for the accuracy of publications and advertisements contained within the magazine and also no warranty or endorsement is express or implied. We do not accept any duty of care to anyone who uses or intends to rely upon any material in this publication.
Alameda, Mollina, Fuente de Piedra, Humilladero
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Royal British Legion News
From Alpaca Farming To Health And Wellbeing Mollina Branch The Royal British Legion Mollina Branch started its winter programme on Tuesday 10th September at La Vina residential park.The second Tuesday of each month is the business meeting with the AGM planned for 8th October. The fourth Tuesday is reserved for social meetings and a lunch is normally served to raise funds which all goes to the Poppy Appeal.
A wide range of speakers have been lined up for these meetings, starting with the visit from Alpaca farmer and local author Alan Parks. Later in the year we have Helen Tumility on the health advantages of yoga and in November, Sarah Jackson from Iznajar will talk about the concept of wellness and the benefits of massage and Reike. Planning has already started for next year so come along and have your say. You don’t have to be a member to attend, and you don't need to be ex-forces personnel to join, though you do need a service qualification to be a beneficiary of the welfare services.
Further details from Dave Punshon 689455704 Barbara Punshon 957535211 Tony Burns 955829547 4
Calling All Areas
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What’s On Guide
Local Markets Sunday: Alameda, Casariche Monday: Archidona, Osuna Tuesday: Mollina, Antequera Weds: Alameda, Saydo Park Mollina Thursday: Humilladero Friday: Fuente de Piedra Saturday: Aguadulce
What’s On Guide British Legion meetings take place every 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month at Parque Las Vina, Mollina at 11am. The friendly Club meets on the first Tuesday of every month except August at “The Camping Restaurant”, Calle Campillos, Fuente de Piedra. We hold a quiz, raffle, cake stall, book exchange and have a speaker. 1st October - Diane Hamer - Inland Solutions Magazine 5th November . Grant Smith, Training The Moroccan/Gambian Army 3rd December - Christmas Meal Fuente Walkers walk every other week on a Friday, normally short walks that take about an hour and a half at a gentle pace, and normally dog friendly. If people would like e mails sent to them about forthcoming walks they can e mail Geoff at gandmspain@yahoo.co.uk Monthly Wellness Clinics with a British Trained Nurse & Welfare Officer take place at Diane's Hair & Beauty Studio in Fuente de Piedra. Please book your appointments now for all regular health checks and any medical issues in private for only €12,50 - book early as appointments are limited. Next Clinics are: Monday 7th October, Monday 4th November & Monday 2nd December from 10am. Tel: 659991743
Ballroom Sequence Dancing, every Wednesday from 2-30- 4pm behind Fuente de Piedra Town Hall. Tel Linda for more details 617165758 El baille se salon, detras el Ayuntamiento Fuente de Piedra cada Miercoles 11 de Septiembre a las 14-30 - 1600 Fancy a game of Petanca?? Never played before? Dont worry there's always someone there to show you how. Just 1€ guarantees you 2 games with the chance of winning points and a bottle of wine. Every Sunday morning at the Pitches in Los Almendros, Fuente de Piedra, from 10:30am 6
Entertainments Advertise your Gigs & Music Night Here!! 1/8 Page Ad - 30 Euro
Sugar & Spice Duo Tel: “Mark Shire” on 636257089 or “Diana” on 659991743 Next Performances: Friday October 11th - The Bodega Bar, Mollina (next to the Olive Oil Factory) Wednesday October 16th - Private Party, Alora
Book your entertainment now for all your Xmas parties Individual or Duo Bookings Check out our Facebook Page www.facebook.com/sugarandspiceinspain
Entertainments 7
Calling All Areas
Monthly Wellness Clinic Monday 7th October & 4th November With British trained nurse & welfare officer Jenny Costello At Diane’s Hair & Beauty Studio Calle la Iglesia, 15, Fuente de Piedra Checks include: Blood Pressure Urinalysis Prostate Cholestrol Breast Check Blood Glucose Pulse, BMI and Moles check General Advice All for only ₏12-50 Tel for appointment: 659991743 Next Clinics: Mon Aug 5th & Sept 2nd 8
Care for your feet
Professional care for diabetic feet
Nutritional & Herbal Supplements Tel: Olivia 660984080 Mollina
Alameda, Mollina, Fuente de Piedra, Humilladero 9
Heroes
Heroes By Dave Punshon A series of totally unrelated incidents this month totally got me thinking about how we all have heroes at different times of our lives. Some may wane and others stay with us throughout our lives. A couple who have a holiday home in our village presented me with a pin badge of the iconic Che Guevara orange and black picture, and I realised that I have never been without this picture in some form since my formative political years. Che became a myth in his own lifetime ─ an international martyr when he died at the age of 39. A revolutionary fighter, he was a great military strategist ,a social philosopher and medical doctor. Che's dream was simple ─ though epic in size. It was to unite Latin America and the rest of the developing world and end, once and for all, the poverty, injustice and petty nationalism that had bled it for centuries. In the end, he paid the ultimate price for his cause. The story transcends history because it is still nationalism which keeps the poor poor and prevents any move to world peace, whilst global exploiters get rich beyond belief. In Russia, these Nationalist tendencies are being used to isolate opposition to Putin and if this includes discrimination against gays and other minorities, so be it. This is why, despite being a British citizen, I am a fervent European internationalist and would vote for a federal Europe in a world governed by a body not unlike the United Nations. The next incident goes back several months, but culminated at a recent car boot sale. Someone, having seen my postings on facebook, sent a message asking if I was related to the Punshons from Saltburn in the UK. When I relayed that I was in fact born there, messages went back and forth for some time; did I know so and so, was I related to... etc etc . Being the youngest of a large family, I only lived in Saltburn for a few months as my father moved to Newton Aycliffe to help build the new town. However, eventually it transpired that this couple had actually grown up with my older brothers, Trevor and Jimmy. Anyway, to cut a very long introduction short, this couple walked up to me on my stall and said “By, you aren’t arf like your dad!” I could not have been paid a greater compliment. This mild-mannered man had very strong principles of social justice and service to the community, being a stalwart of the local Labour party and founder of the local branch and club of the Royal British Legion .With 10 children, my parents may not have had much money but in the words of mother, “they did see life.”
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My father lived to the principle of family community and friends, and was always there ─ whatever I or my siblings got up to. He was a friend of Lord Beveridge during the formative years of the NHS and would be very upset by the last two years. My only regret is that I left home to get married at the age of 20 and this great man died when I was 24, so I never really got to know him as an adult. At a funeral recently, I met a Spanish lady and started chatting ─ only to find that we shared a hero, though for very differing reasons. As a lifelong trade unionist, I had always admired Jack Jones as General Secretary of the TGWU and leader of the broad left within the Labour Party .I was privileged in later years to get to know Jack personally through the National Pensioners’ convention and Age Concern, and he always lived life according to the principles of fairness and justice. I knew of course of Jack’s service with the International Brigade during the Spanish Civil War, but it seemed such a long time ago. However for her, this was the reason for her reverence as her grandfather and uncle had served alongside Jack and were both killed for the cause. Though she was born long after the conflict, the bravery of those who came to fight for another country’s cause has never been forgotten. A few years ago, I re-connected with a young woman whom I had known since she was a teenager and had worked for me at Age Concern Teesside until she moved away to get married and raise her family.
Heroes 11
Heroes
At this time, Lyndsay was sadly going through a divorce but more importantly, was severely disabled due to a botched NHS operation. Almost two years ago, she had to have an above-the-knee amputation of her left leg. During that time, she must have had some down times but she never let it show. She had a tremendous sense of humour and the brightest of all smiles. Last year Lyndsay re-married, and in her own words, played a “minor part” in the opening and closing ceremonies at the Para Olympics. Following this eventful year, Lyndsay has thrown herself at life, taking part in theatre, helping the army train soldiers for Afghanistan by acting in injury simulation and has launched her own website www.neo-york.com selling “funky” walking sticks. Lyndsay comments on the site, “I really do love colour, it reflects my personality and my unique style. Okay, so I use a walking stick, but that doesn't mean I can't be fashionable, elegant and a little bit quirky!” Three years after her amputation Lynds still gets periods when she feels very down but with the help of family and friends (particularly Mum) she picks herself up and gets on with life. In 2002, when I was Mayor of Guisborough, one of the duties was to select a “citizen of the year” ─ someone who deserves acknowledgement for their attitude and contribution to the town. Traditionally, this was usually an older person but I bucked the trend by picking someone who still holds the record for being the youngest ever. Clair Wallis, 14 years at the time, had impressed me by how she and her family coped with cerebral palsy. I had known Clair since she was born as her granddad was landlord of my local “The Globe”. An active member of the girl guides, she was always to be found at remembrance parades in her wheelchair, sporting her poppy with pride. As the RBL’s Dick Rodham was Barbara’s choice the previous year, Clair was a natural candidate. Despite a difficult time medically, and several major operations, Clair was determined to be independent and was accepted at Sunderland University to train as a social worker. 12
After qualifying in 2010, Clair was successful in applying for a post as social worker with Redcar and Cleveland Council. “Having been through the system myself, helping others is a dream job,” she maintained. The common theme of all of my heroes is the underlining belief in fairness and the determination to help others ─ dashed with a warmth which is catching. If you have any HEROES, famous or not, with a story you would like to share with readers, send to: info@inlandsolutions.es Property of the Month Casariche 95,000 euros 2 beds, 2 baths Plot: 600m2 Build: 100m2
Best Properties Andalucía
Tel - 952 735 046 www.bpaonline.es
Property Sales & Rentals Advice Centre for Legal Matters,
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Healthy Living
Healthy Living Are you happy with your weight? Are you striving for a flat stomach, toned legs and arms and a pert bottom? If your body is not living up to the unrealistic expectations you are putting upon it not you are not alone. Statistics report that as many as 80% of women today are dissatisfied with their appearance. Historically, the ideal female body was strong and voluptuous, as seen in icons such as Marilyn Monroe. Yet even as early as the 1800s, when painful, health-impairing corsets were used to accentuate the breasts, hips and buttocks, women were expected to strive for a specific ideal of beauty. Full-figured women have had a raw deal in recent years. Until very recently unless you had boyish physique, with no hips and bottom, and a concave abdomen you ran the risk of being branded as indulgent and lacking in self-control, unable or un willing to make the sacrifices necessary to achieve that sought after, emaciated, model-like figure. What no one tells us is that the pictures of the models in the magazines that we strive to emulate are not real, they do not exist. They are photoshopped images of women who spend their lives starving themselves to look that way. We could never look the way those women do, because they don't either! Our obsession with our weight is an expression of a deeper inner unhappiness. We use food in an attempt to fill the inner emptiness we feel inside. We seek the feeling of being full, what we have not yet realised is that the emotional emptiness we feel inside ourselves cannot be filled with food. This yearning for fulfillment happens at a subconscious level. Our child hood fears of abandonment and not being good enough can become reduced to an almost palpable image of an empty hole inside us, one that can only be filled by something outside of us. That primal, early memory of being hungry, being ignored and unattended to, and desperately needing milk in order to survive and feel comforted and loved, in order to avoid discomfort gets implanted in our subconscious minds. We recall it as a potential disaster state. We fear that maybe no one will be there to fill that void, and then it'll go on endlessly, while we helplessly wait in anguish.
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Maybe this sounds somewhat dramatic, but our subconscious mind is a feeling thing, with the mental age of a six year old. It does not reason, no matter how well we can logic it out, that that was then and this is now and this situation is no longer the same. Real change in our eating pattern is achieved by undoing this subconscious programme and replacing it with one that serves us better. Until this is done our ever powerful subconscious mind will continue to overrule the reasoning of our conscious mind. We will continue to eat because of emotional triggers not real physical hunger. The key to changing this behaviour, permanently is altering the beliefs of the subconscious mind. Using advanced hypnotherapy techniques this can quickly and painlessly be achieved. Whilst in hypnosis the therapist will help you to access your subconscious mind. The out dated programmes that you are running are brought to light and replaced with new, helpful thought patterns that effect lasting change in your day to day life. All this is achieved without bringing up your deepest darkest secrets or constantly revisiting past traumas and painful memories. Often clients report changes in their eating patterns after the very first session. With the minimum of effort you will find yourself making choices that were previously inaccessible to you, choices that move you easily and effectively towards your goals. No more dieting, no more semi starvation followed by self loathing. These advanced hypnotherapy techniques give you freedom, the freedom to make healthy choices around what you put into your body and, more importantly, what you leave out.
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Healthy Living
If you are interested in trying advanced hypnotherapy of would like to discuss any aspect of this article I would love to hear from you, please tweet me at @ImesonJackson or contact me on sarah@imesonjackson.com
Antequera, Alameda, Mollina, Fuente de Piedra, Humilladero
TRAVEL
AGENCY &
INSURANCE
AGENCY
Plaza de la Constituci贸n, 26 Fuente de Piedra (M谩laga) Telf. / M贸vil: 952 73 53 39 // 618 36 91 69 fergoviajes@grupoqualitas.com TRAVEL:
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Dry Cleaning Services
Rugs Quilts Curtains Flamenco Dress Party Dress/ Suits Duvets Blankets
Your Feria Pics - Villanueva del Trabuco
Your Feria Pics 17
Tech Corner
Tech Corner - with Inland Computer Services Foistware - A common source for nasties What on Earth is Foistware ??? Well, you have probably seen it when installing or updating software. If you watch carefully, during the update/ installation process, you are offered additional software. For example, Adobe Reader and Flash updates/installs offer you either Google Chrome or McAfee Security Scan Plus, whilst Java tries to impose the dreaded Ask toolbar browser add-on onto you. Whilst gaining an extra program such a Google Chrome webbrowser isn’t a problem, the question is do you actually need it ? If you did, then you would probably have already downloaded and installed it. Although the same question applies to other foistware, there is a potential downside which should be taken seriously - McAfee Security Scan Plus is probably not needed if you already have good antivirus protection in place, not to mention, that having more than one active antivirus product is a very bad idea, as multiple instances of AV programs will take up valuable memory and conflict with each other, leading to no protection at all. Other common foistware offerings such as Ask Toolbar and Delta Toolbar should be avoided at all costs, the latter having been identified in IT circles as malware and once installed, both products are incredibly difficult to remove from your computer. It is absolutely critical to regularly update Adobe products and also Java, as these are common points of vulnerability for malware, however, our recommendation is to always proceed slowly and carefully when installing/ updating, rather than blindly clicking the next button - and always untick boxes which offer you other free software.
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Windows 8.1 Update Due for general release on Friday 18th October, the main notable element of this release is the return of the “Start” button. Another key change is that installed programs will no longer have icons automatically appear within the Start/ Metro page and it will be necessary to scroll down to “Apps” view (small icons rather than large tiles, in order to then right-click and “pin” to either the Taksbar or Start page. The idea is that this makes the start/metro interface less cluttered and gives the end-user more control. Amongst other changes, there are performance improvements and an easier option for booting directly to desktop, avoiding the metro interface.
3 Quick Mobile/Tablet App Suggestions AntiVirus Protection
Freebie for Stargazing
Weather Forecast
Lookout
Google Sky Map (An) Starwalk (iOS)
El Tiempo
Android 4.4 named KitKat The next version of Google Android mobile operating system will be called KitKat.
Rumours suggest it will be released in October, along with Google’s new Nexus 5 device.
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Tech Corner
Previous versions of Android have been along the sweet-tooth theme, with Cupcake, Donut, Eclair, Froyo (short for Frozen Yoghurt), Gingerbread, Honeycomb, IceCream Sandwich and Jelly Bean.
Calling All Areas
A very warm welcome to all British customers Open 6 days a week all through the day Anti-crisis prices. Coffee only 1â‚Ź Calle Campillos, 22 Fuente Piedra Tel: - 658919446/619463913
Advertise Your Business Here Âź page for 50 Euro per edition Call Inland Solutions 659991743 info@inlandsolutions.es Dear Friends, Please come and enjoy a fun day with us and raise much needed money for animal welfare and Church funds. Bring your dog if you have one but it's not compulsory!
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Calling All Areas
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Your Feria Pics
Your Feria Pics - Fuente De Piedra
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Your Feria Pics
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Out and About
La Cuidad de los Ni単os - Cordoba If you are looking for a day out, and in particular something to keep younger people entertained, Cordoba has an excellent park with something for everybody. La Ciudad de los Ni単os is a large park with plenty of playground activities for all ages. It certainly has much more to offer than the normal playground and keeps children happy for hours. So what has it got that makes it a fun place? This year saw the introduction of a large ground level trampoline where up to 35 people can all jump at once. It also has climbing nets, many high climbing frames with long tunnel slides, obstacles to tackle and poles for sliding down. There are plenty of swings and not just the traditional sort, some of the much larger round swings can easily take 6 children in one go. At certain times there is also a mini zip-line that is supervised by members of staff to ensure children are wearing a safety helmet. Some of the attractions are aimed at getting children to see how things work. These include water systems that need pumping in order to get the flow of water moving to a different area, and mini diggers to sit on and move sand and water around - always a favourite attraction. Another interesting set of play activities are the musical instruments that can be found dotted around. There are a number of xylophones, drums and chimes that can be played which add a relaxing sound to the park. It seems that many parents and older people aspire to be a budding Evelyn Glennie! For older children there is also a skate area with ramps, and for little toddlers there are plenty of play houses to go in and out of. 24
From a parents perspective, the safety of the park is very good. There is only one combined entrance and exit and the whole 45,000 m2 is surrounded by a brightly painted fence so there are no unwelcome escapes. There is a café serving hot and cold drinks and snacks, with tables and chairs available under the shade. If you are looking for a place to just sit and relax whilst the youngsters are playing, there are plenty of benches and shady grass areas to sit in. Indeed, the whole park has a lovely lay out of various trees and shrubs with their names mentioned too. Dogs are not allowed in the park, and smoking isn´t permitted either.
The park is located on Avenida Menéndez Pidal and is easy to find as it´s very close to both the zoo (Parque Zoológico de José Cruz Conde) and the botanical gardens (Botánico de Córdoba). Here, you can find paid parking although it will involve a walk up the hill to reach the park, or free on the road parking is available around the Park Cruz Conde which is located opposite. The Córdoba open top sight-seeing bus also has a stop directly outside. There is an entrance fee, but this is very low, prices are €1 for children aged 5 to 12 years, (under 5´s are free) and €2 for adults. The park is closed on Mondays but opening times for October and November are as follows:
Tuesday to Friday
Saturday and Sunday
October
12.00 - 19.00
11.00 - 19.00
November
12.00 - 18.00
11.00 - 18.00 Out and About
For more information, visit the park website at: http://www.ciudaddelosninos.cordoba.es Written by CK 25
Pepi’s Page
From Freedom to Fear What we are about to tell you is a true story of two small abandoned dogs -one three-year-old male and the other we believed to be his daughter, a tiny puppy. They made their home in a storm drain near our hill in Pedrera. It was clear that although they had been fed by different people, they did not want human contact. Both Jane and I made regular visits to make sure they had fresh water. Our caravan is situated at the top of our hill and after finishing work at the refuge one day, we returned to the caravan to find two little heads peering out at us from underneath it. We felt honoured that they chose to come and stay with us. Each morning the dad -- who was very vocal -- would come to the caravan door and demand their breakfast. They were inseparable, and he was teaching her everything he knew. Even though they had been free spirits for some time, the dad finally let us fuss and stroke him but he would not let the puppy come anywhere near us. After a short time and gaining our trust, he allowed her to come to us and take food from our hands, but she would not let us stroke her yet. They still wandered off every day -- where to we don't know -- but would always return for an afternoon sleep, then go again and return at night for their supper and sleep. On this particular Monday morning they were at the caravan door demanding breakfast and we left as usual to work at the refuge. On our return at lunchtime they were not there, but that was not unusual as they did like to wander. But they didn't come back that night either -- and that’s when we became concerned. We went looking and calling for them but to no avail. Tuesday came and went -- still no sign of them. Wednesday morning came and the first thing we did was look under the caravan to see if they were there. Yes! We were so pleased to see them -- only to realise that it was only dad there; no baby puppy. Also, he looked so sad, frail and weak. We called him out from under the caravan and saw he was covered in blood and shaking his head. Instinct told us he had been shot. After a quick phone call to our vet, we took him straight to the clinic where x rays confirmed that he had been shot by a 12 bore shotgun. He was sedated and operated on immediately. The bullet was removed and did no permanent damage. He will survive the shooting but not the loss of his little baby, his soulmate.
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When we collected him from the vet we could see so much sadness and pain in his eyes. We have to keep him shut indoors now as we know he will want to go looking for his little baby, but we know she won’t be coming back. He lives indoors with us but does not bother to talk to us like he did when he had his puppy with him. All we can do now is care for him and keep him safe; we hope that we can find him a loving home to help heal his pain.
Did you know?? The law in Andalucia states that your puppy or dog must have two rabies vaccinations at the start of its vaccination programme. You are only allowed to go over the due date by one month or you will have to start from the beginning again. Another two rabies jabs will then apply.
Did you know?? You should never let your dog have any vigorous exercise one hour before or one hour after their meal. A leash walk is fine but vigorous exercise can cause a twisted intestine. Symptoms are wanting to eat but not eating, and being very lethargic.
Pepi’s Page
Pepi's Refuge Calle Hormigo, Las Ravueltas Pedrera, 41566 Tel: 953 120 574 Donations accepted through Paypal on Pepi's website http://www.pepisdogrefuge.com email: pepis.dogrefuge@yahoo.co.uk
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Smiles
Through the eyes & mouths of Children ... A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'. The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?' The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God.' The teacher paused and said, 'But no one knows what God looks like.' Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, 'They will in a minute.'
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to 'honour' thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, 'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?' From the back, one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'
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One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?' Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.' The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. 'Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, 'And there's the teacher, she's dead.' A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, 'Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.' 'Yes,' the class said. 'Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?' A little fellow shouted, 'Cause your feet ain't empty.' The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE ... God is watching.'
A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples..' 29
Smiles
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
Interesting Articles
Football Legends – Willie Foulke William "Fatty" Foulke was born in Dawley, Shropshire, on 12th April 1874. He joined Sheffield United for the fee of £20 direct from his colliery works football team at the age of 20. At the time, an average man stood only five feet five inches high and Foulke towered over his contemporaries, measuring a fine six feet four inches. Not surprisingly, goalkeeping came naturally to him and with the focus of football in this age very firmly fixed on the physical side of the sport, he prospered. With forwards encouraged to manhandle the keeper ─ and if necessary, bundle him over the line along with the ball to register a goal ─ it was with some reticence that they attempted this with Foulke. On 2nd December, 1895, Scottish Sport reported: "In Foulke, Sheffield United have a goalkeeper who will take a lot of beating. He is one of those lengthy individuals who can take a seat on the crossbar whenever he chooses, and shows little of the awkwardness usually characteristic of big men." In the 1896-97 season, Sheffield United were runners-up and Foulke had conceded just 29 goals ─ easily the best defensive record in the Football League, and something which, with Foulke between the sticks, United were to repeat a few times in the years following. Foulke won his first international cap against Wales on 29th March 1897. Although England won 4-0, surprisingly, it was the only time he played for his country. As Foulke’s reputation grew over the years, so did his waistline and he became affectionately known as "Fatty" or “Colossus" by the fans. He once said of his weight: "I don't mind what they call me as long as they don't call me late for my lunch." One journalist wrote: "His ponderous girth brings no inconvenience and the manner in which he gets down to low shots explodes any idea that a superfluity of flesh is a handicap." Some forwards did attempt to ruffle Foulke’s feathers but usually it was to backfire. One such player, Liverpool’s George Allan, tried it in 1898 but as the Liverpool Post reported: "Allan charged Foulke in the goalmouth, and the big man, losing his temper, seized him by the leg and turned him upside down." 30
After playing in more than 350 games for Sheffield United, Foulke decided to leave the club when he refused to take a pay cut. In May 1905, Foulke was sold to a newly-formed Chelsea FC for a transfer fee of £50 and in his first season, he helped them to finish in third place. Just one season and 35 games later, he moved to today’s opponents Bradford City ─ again for the princely sum of £50. However, he now weighed over 25 stone, and was no longer as agile as he was. He retired from first-class football in November 1907. Foulke remains in the record books as the heaviest ever first-class footballer to play anywhere in the world. Foulke died of cirrhosis on 1st May 1916 aged just 42. By Stuart Govier
Interesting Articles
FLORISTERIA GONDI Bouquets, Wreaths, Ceramics and Gifts C/Iglesia 23, Fuente De Piedra Telephone - 952735169 / 659916918 Email - gondi71@hotmail.com 31
Out and About with Nick & Mo
Nick & Mo’s Green Fingers Via Verde de la Sierra, Olvera to Puerto Serrano A couple of years ago some friends told us of a day out they had walking on the Via Verde and said how much they had enjoyed it, so when some other friends suggested that we should try it, on one of our regular days out, we jumped at the idea. So what is the Via Verde? Well, literally translated Vias Verdes are green routes ,or greenways and this a programme to make use of the abandoned railway lines all across Spain to encourage rural tourism. There are more than 7,500km of abandoned railways across the country, many of which were built, but never opened and, since the programme was launched in 1993,1,800km has been opened as Vias Verdes. These green routes are completely traffic free and are for walkers , cyclists and horseriders only. They are, mostly, very flat, tarmaced and signposted and pass though beautiful, unspoilt countryside. They are free to use, suitable for people of all abilities and ages and you are able to go just as far as you want. The Via Verde that we chose to visit was the Via Verde de la Sierra which starts in Olvera and finishes in Puerto Serrano, or, if you want to do it the other way round, starts in Puerto Serrano and finishes in Olvera, but whichever way you choose to go, if you do the whole route, it is 38km long. This route passes through some really spectacular countryside and was voted the best greenway in Europe in 2009.
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We decided that on this occasion we would not try to walk the whole length of the Via Verde, but would visit various points along the route and in this way be able to get a good idea of the track and perhaps decide which way would be best to go when we do set out to walk the whole route in the Spring. The start of the Via Verde in Olvera is well signed and not difficult to find, but, if you have never been to Olvera before, it is worth spending a little time exploring this lovely little white town before you begin your walk. We parked at the bottom of the town and walked up to the ancient town centre, the Casco Antiguo, for a coffee and you can immediately feel the Mooring influence with the narrow streets and lovely old buildings. The church of Parroquia de Nuestra Senora de la Encarnacion sits right next to an imposing Arab castle and Moorish wall, from where you get fabulous views looking down over the surrounding countryside. Olvera certainly is a very interesting and beautiful place and is somewhere that we have noted as being well worth an extended visit in the future. At the start of the Via Verde is the Estacion de Olvera. This old railway station now houses a rural hotel and a restaurant and is a good place to sit and have a drink at the start or finish of your walk, or stock up on some water and nibbles in case you have forgotten to bring some. There is plenty of accommodation for those who want to stay here either in the hotel, or in rural bungalows and you can also hire bicycles, or get information about the Via Verde. You soon notice just how popular the Via Verde is as a number of people, some walking and others on bicycles, arrived or departed as we sat at the estacion.
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Out and About with Nick & Mo
As soon as you start your walk you are surrounded by beautiful countryside and look down on a valley, dotted with fincas and farms. There are a variety of trees and shrubs on either side of the track , particularly oak and olive and you are immediately aware that this is an agricultural area where every metre of land is utilized. Even though it was mid September there were still a substantial number of wild flowers along the track and you can get a good idea of how wonderful it must be in early Spring. Adding to the pleasure of the walk is the sound of birdsong, the trees seeming to be full of finches and warblers, rock thrushes and the distinctive call of the black starlings . Kestrels and other birds of prey can also be seen hovering above.
Out and About with Nick & Mo
There are thirty tunnels along the route of the Via Verde and it is not too long before you come to the first one. The tunnels vary in length from under 100m to almost a kilometer .Many are illuminated and the lights either come on automatically when you enter the tunnel, or you simply press the switch. The longer tunnels have two or more switches to control the lights, but you have good time to reach the second set before the first ones go out! Having said that ,there has been a problem with cable being stolen in some of the tunnels and the lights ceasing to function. We found ourselves in one of the longer tunnels close to Coripe that had been lit until you reached halfway , then with no light at all in the second half. Suddenly finding yourself in total darkness is a very eerie experience and, for some people, could be very unnerving. If you have hired a bicycle that has a lamp it would not be too bad, but I would strongly suggest that one essential piece of equipment for the Via Verde is a powerful torch! We next went to Puerto Serrano to check out the other end of the track and, as with Olvera , there is a converted estacion offering accommodation and a very nice restaurant. You can also hire bicycles here and there is an administration/information centre where you can get more information about things that you can see along the greenway. The Rio Gualdalete runs alongside the route down in the valley and, as with the whole of the Via Verde ,the countryside really is spectacular. We then went on to Coripe which is about halfway along the Via Verde. Again there is an estacion here and we can vouch for the friendliness of the staff and the quality of the food. It was in Coripe that we had the experience with the tunnel, but don’t let this put you off. Also situated here is a viaduct here, one of four along the total route, with the Rio Gualdalporcun flowing underneath. At the beginning of the viaduct there is a signed track leading to the Chaparro de la Vega. This is a centuries old Holm oak tree that has been declared a national monument and is well worth the 1k walk to see. We had planned to walk from Coripe to the last stop on our trip, the natural reserve at Zaframagon, but after the experience with the lights in the tunnel and the fact that we did not have a torch we decided on this occasion to drive and leave the walk until we do the whole route next spring. Whether you do the walk or not, the Penon de Zaframagon nature reserve is something you should not miss. The estacion here has been converted into a centre for information about the flora and fauna of the Via Verde and ornithological observatory.
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The Penon itself is a huge and very impressive limestone crag that is a major nesting site for griffon vultures and home to many other species of birds and mammals. Cameras have been installed close to where the vultures nest and 1km away, in the visitor centre you are able to see them in real time on a large screen and operate the camera with a joystick. The centre has a wealth of other information about the the natural park and the Via Verde and is worth the small entry fee, particularly when you know this is going towards the preservation of the area and the overall greenway. The entrance fee is currently 2 euros, or 1 euro for seniors and children. The centre is open from 10am to 1pm and 5pm to 8pm in the summer and 10am to 1:30pm and 4pm to 6:30pm in the winter. If you need to check on times etc you can check by telephoning 956 136 372,or info@fundacionviaverdedelasierra.com It is worth noting that the Via Verde is sometimes closed in August if there is a high risk of fires, but if you are unsure just check before you set out. It’s not necessary to be in the centre to see the vultures as they are easily seen with the naked eye. Standing on the viaduct watching these huge and graceful birds soaring over the spectacular countryside is a sight to remember and certainly one of the highlights of our Via Verde experience.
Just a word of advice, for comfort, wear “sensible� footwear!!!
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& Mo with Nick Articles Out and About Interesting
The Via Verde is not for everyone, but if you enjoy walking, or cycling and experiencing some of the most spectacular countryside in Andalucia then it is not to be missed. We will certainly be walking the whole route next spring and stopping overnight at one of the estacions and maybe, via the magazine, we could organize for more people to join us. So, whether you want to walk, or would prefer to have a bike ride a long way, or just enjoy a meal in one of the lovely Estacion restaurants , and then take a stroll, do give the Via Verde a try, you will not be disappointed.
Interesting Articles
Review - Piensos Shop, Fuente de Piedra Pepe and Maria Louisa Bravo own "Piensos" hardware shop which you can find at Calle La Ceramica in Fuente de Piedra. Turn left at the mini roundabout in front of the Sports Hall and left again. You will find it 20 yards on the right hand side.
The best way to describe it is an Aladdin's cave of any bits and bobs for the home, garden and swimming pool -- even including food, housing and collars for your pet. They really do have everything from batteries to tap washers and light bulbs -- all at much cheaper prices. If you can't see what you want on the shelves, just ask and you can bet your bottom dollar they'll find it for you. I highly recommend shopping here before looking anywhere else!
JOSÉ BRAVO CASTILLO Pet Food * Gardening * Ironmongers Swimming Pool Products * Workshoes & Overalls C/ La Ceramica, 8 Fuente Piedra Tel : 670 677 953 * 687 812 675 36
Puente Genil
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Stories
First Impressions By Ella Durham (Lorna Button) Anna tilted her head to the left, then to the right. She was almost tempted to turn her head upside down to get a better idea but in the end, thought better of it. It would ruin her new hairdo. She sighed. It was no good. Try as she might, contemporary art ─ and this painting in particular ─ left her cold. She had always thought art galleries were for knowledgeable visitors, culture vultures and working ‘arteests’ who cringingly called themselves ‘darling’. She’d only agreed to come to this Art Appreciation class to please her friend Julie; to get herself back into the world. But what if no-one found her interesting or appealing? She shuddered. Her confidence had taken a real bashing lately. Anna reflected on the past five months. She’d been through such a lot and Mike cheating on her like that and then running off with that twenty-year-old floozy ─ well, it was almost too much. She’d been quite ill at the time. Now she needed to prove something to herself. After all, she was only thirty-four and not done for yet! “It’ll be a boost to your confidence,” Julie had enthused. “Art is all about making a statement. You can do that. They’ll love you, Anna, nearly as much as I do! C’mon, it’s a great idea – doing something different! I’ll be with you so you needn’t feel awkward. Arty people are nice people. You never know, you might even hit it off with one of them!” she’d added. It seemed unlikely. An hour earlier, Anna had come to this draughty gallery’s exhibition hall and peered in through the crack in the doorway. Oh, the group members looked nice enough, but they all appeared to be over sixty. She’d convinced herself they’d all be as dull as ditchwater; constantly spouting forth about Monet, Van Dyke and Goya. Art had never been Anna’s strong point. She thought that Monet was something you bought your groceries with, that Van Dyke starred in ‘Mary Poppins’ and, as far as she knew, Goya made perfume! She just felt out of place, but Julie had insisted she give it a go. Anna stared at the painting again, nudged her friend’s elbow and whispered, “But what’s it supposed to be, Jules?” “It’s one of his finest works ─ it’s his wife. It’s how she looked to him. A wonderful masterpiece in every sense,” a deep voice whispered into Anna’s ear. The voice was like liquid chocolate; dark and rich with a soft, sweet sensation that made her tingle. She spun round to see who owned such a succulent tone. A man, mid-thirties with heavy brown curls, a wide smile and a seriously muscular torso, stood close behind her. His hazel eyes twinkled like those of a mischievous child. Anna almost felt weak at the knees. He couldn’t possibly be coming to her art group ─ he was too gorgeous! She tried to stay cool. “Well, all I can see is a lot of funny angled lines and a very distorted face. It doesn’t look that good to me and if any man of mine ever saw me in that way, I’d be very worried indeed! Was the artist mad when he painted this?” she asked, looking into Chocolate Voice’s eyes as she bit her lip and stifled a nervous giggle. The man chuckled. “Aren’t you keen on a Picasso?” he enquired; the smooth, melting chocolatey words trickling into her ears.
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“I… I… don’t know, really, I’ve always driven Ford Fiestas,” she stammered in reply. He laughed out loud then bent down to her and whispered, “There’s a coffee shop just down the hall. Fancy a quick one?” “Beg pardon?” Anna replied, slightly startled. “A coffee! Would you join me?” “Oh, I see, yes. Thanks.” A slight blush appeared in her cheeks. “But I shouldn’t take too long ─ my art class is due to start soon.” “Don’t worry, it won’t start without you. I’ll make sure of that.” They chatted easily over lattes. Chocolate Voice ─ or Simon as he was usually known ─ ran the art class. He was a friend of Julie’s. He was glad to meet Anna, he said. He’d heard a lot about her and thought it took some bottle to come along here after all she’d had to cope with recently. Anna relaxed. Simon was kind, reassuring. Suddenly, being here didn’t seem so fearsome after all. Jules was right; it was a good thing to do. It would certainly help her recover from her personal ordeal and put it behind her. She would be very proud of herself. “Oh, we’d better go,” said Simon, looking at his watch and picking up his bag of brushes and acrylics. “Class starts in a few minutes. Where’s your bag of stuff?” “I left it in the gallery cloakroom. I’ll get it. See you inside, then.” Anna set off down the hallway, a spring in her step. He really was very nice! The group assembled behind their easels. Anna and Julie closed the door behind them and took their places at the front of the class. Then, together, they stepped up onto a raised plinth and struck a pose. Anna held up a golden ewer onto her bare shoulder. Her cream satin, Grecian-style gown flowed seductively over the other shoulder and down her body to the floor. The gossamer cloth clung to her bare breasts just enough to tantalise ─ yet not enough to shame. Anna had dreaded this but now, she liked the sexy feeling. She held her head high. She could feel all eyes upon her but did not move. She waited for her cue from Julie. “Now, Anna!” Jules whispered. In unison, the two young women removed their wigs to reveal their bald heads beneath. Simon stepped in front of them and faced the group. “Ladies and gentlemen. Today, we are honoured and privileged to have Anna and Julie act as our life models. I’m sure you’ll agree that they are truly beautiful and will make very fine portraits. Don’t forget, all of your efforts will be sold to raise funds for their Breast Cancer Awareness charity, so do your absolute best!” A thunderous round of applause followed. Anna grinned broadly at Julie then glanced downward to where Simon stood. He winked back at her and mouthed, ‘Fancy supper later?’
Stories 39
Out and About with Jenny
Castellar de la Frontera The train from Bobadilla to San Roque takes the same time as the flight from Malaga to Gatwick but it seems so much quicker. After Ronda the single track line runs along the floor of a steep-sided valley in the Grazalema National Park. For much of the journey the line accompanies a small stream and from time to time we catch a glimpse of a footpath linking two of the stations that provide excellent jumping-off points for walkers in this popular hiking area. In springtime there is an abundance of wild flowers along the route but the birdlife is evident all year round. As Jimena de la Frontera disappears from view the stork nests on every passing electricity pylon indicate that we will soon be arriving at San Roque and we speculate that a distant castellated mountain might be our eventual destination. Our friend Steve is waiting on the platform. We squeeze into his open-topped car to be whisked off for a coffee at Sotogrande. Giving up on the idea of looking cool after the volumising effect of the wind in my hair I take out my camera to snap the yachts. After lunch at a quiet restaurant beside a mountain road we continue to the walled village of Castellar de la Frontera. Since the villagers were moved to a brand new settlement in the valley in 1971 the old village has attracted a new population. We are lucky to find a parking space outside the walls. Walking up to the town we are immediately struck by the views over the Guadarranque Reservoir. The narrowness of the cobbled streets precludes the use of cars, making it a tranquil place to wander. Pots of carefully tended flowers invite the painter and photographer to immortalise the scene on canvas and screen. Many of the old houses have been converted to casas rurales. We linger in one or two craft shops. Outside the village store two tourists chat to a man with a bird of prey perched on his arm. Edging past man and bird we venture inside to purchase locally produced honey. Beside the main gate the old castle has been turned into a hotel. Across the square we enter a small bar which doubles as an art gallery. The bar consists of two rooms linked by a narrow wooden staircase protected by a rope handle on its open side. The artist’s work covers the walls. It is also his home. The only downside of the train journey is that the last train leaves at 15.46, so all too soon we have to tear ourselves away. On the way back to the car we note a footpath sign indicating a 5 ½ hour walk to Jimena de la Frontera. This and a path from here to Gibraltar are two good reasons to come back and spend a night in the hotel. With minutes to spare we arrive back in San Roque only to be halted by the level crossing barriers outside the station. The minutes tick by until the train passes and the barrier is lifted. It was our train. Jenny Whiteley
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Puente Genil
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Your Feria Pics
Your Feria Pics - Alameda
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Your Feria Pics
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Restaurant Review
Restaurant Review Bar Tejada, Fuente de Piedra Bar Tejada has recently been taken over by new proprietors Dani and Denisse and what an improvement on opening hours and customer service. Last Friday we went for a Menu del Dia at 2pm and found quite a few people already sat outside having their lunch. Despite this we were served almost immediately by Denisse´s sister Ruth who is the Camarera (waitress). We ordered a glass of wine and a coke.
A choice of four starters, main courses and sweet were offered. We chose spaghetti and salad to start, then spare ribs and breaded chicken both served with chips for the main course. The spaghetti was topped with a tangy tomato sauce and would normally have been enough for me as it was such a generous portion for a starter. The salad was also a meal in itself and the thought of another course was a bit overwhelming, not forgetting the bread rolls that were automatically placed on the table. As soon as we'd finished the first course our main meal was ready and placed in front of us. Wow!! This had to be the quickest service we've had in Spain so if you prefer a leisurely lunch I'd recommend you order your main course after you've had your starters. The ribs were nice and spicy and the three breaded chicken fillets were a bit too much for Howie, so we took the left overs home for Shadow (the dog). Our sweet was a vanilla ice cream lolly which we just about managed to finish off. All in all we had an excellent three course meal with bread rolls and a drink for only 8â‚Ź each. Compliments to all the staff who were on the ball, Manolo the Chef, Fernando & Margarita the kitchen assistants, Ruth the waitress and of course Dani and Denisse.
Take note too that when other bars close mid afternoon, Bar Tejada will be open & serving meals all through the day. Restaurant/ Bar meals are served from: Monday to Thurs 1pm to 10-30pm contiuously all day Friday to Sunday 1pm to 11pm continuously all day 44
The Pondering Page... In this new section, we intend to post questions (and hopefully answers) and other topics from readers. Subjects can be absolutely anything, such as life in Spain, historical origins, how do I’s, or just general knowledge ponderings. Send your topics, questions (and/or answers) to info@inlandsolutions.es with a subject heading of “Ponderings”
Q
“Does anyone know where I can get online discount vouchers for major attractions, theme parks and entertainment events here in Andalucía ?”
Many thanks, Pam Darby
Q
“A friend of mine recently suggested that Marmalade actually originates from Portugal. It surprised me on two levels, as it’s considered to be a very British preserve and my understanding was that oranges from Sevilla are used in the process. Interested to hear if anyone knows more about the history.” Yours faithfully, T. Osbourne
Beware of Credit Card Fraud Dear Editor,
Vimi Gisby 45
The Pondering Page
I am writing to you to warn people about credit card fraud here in Spain. Someone -- who I believe must have been British because of the way the card was used -- somehow got my credit card number and used it to acquire cash in Archidona. They also did an O2 UK top up for £10.00 – hence my suspicions about their nationality -- and tried to withdraw £3,000. Please, everyone, be on your guard. Never let your card out of your sight – for example if you’re paying by card in a shop or restaurant – and always make sure you’re not overlooked when you withdraw cash at machines. No-one can afford to be robbed!
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What’s the phrase ?
Clue - Woody Allen film from 1972 Solution can be found on our website http://inlandsolutions.es
Maths Square Try to fill in the missing numbers. Use the numbers 1 through 25 to complete the equations. Each number is only used once. Each row is a math equation. Work from left to right. Each column is a math equation. Work from top to bottom. Solution can be found on our website http:// inlandsolutions.es
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Paul
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