GRANDparenting
Pandemic Grandparent
I
f you asked me to rate my Pandemic Year, I’d give it about 6 out of 10 on the suck-o-meter. Over the year, I watched my career go down quicker than a toddler’s toy in the toilet. And I discovered new soul-sucking anxiety that sabotaged any get-up-and-go that might’ve rescued said career.
I didn’t take up any hobbies—unless you consider carb loading and emptying wine bottles a hobby—so I jealously watched as Facebook “friends” baked bread, learned knitting, and discovered gardening. I didn’t even clean out my closets. My big accomplishment: becoming a grandmother. I know it doesn’t take much effort on my end, but I’ll take all the compliments and congratulations I can get. My 14 Grand
granddaughter is really darn cute and I feel my genes had something to do with that. Obviously, becoming a new grandmother in a pandemic requires a few modifications from normal grandparenting. When my granddaughter was born in September 2020, I had to forgo my hope of attending her birth as there was a limit to the number of people who could be there. My daughter and her husband chose a home birth, which is scary enough for a grandmother-to-be, but add to that my extreme anxiety, and, well, let’s say I was smart enough to keep my mouth shut. My mother attended my first birth and literally had a panic attack, so, in hindsight, I probably was the most helpful as a distanced cheering squad. The next few months, my visits with my granddaughter and daughter were through a window. Being a new mom is hard, but I can’t imagine how hard it would be through a pandemic. No family help, no friends, isolation and no baby showers. They did have an online baby group—with all mics on for the sing-alongs! The new mama was tired. I hated that I couldn’t do the grandma thing where you bring over a casserole and hold the baby while mama has a shower. Not being able to help my daughter was what stung the most. My daughter wanted to be a mom since age 10, is a trained doula, and is regarded as a “baby whisperer.” I look back at the anxious new mom I was— my first time holding a baby was my first born and maternity leave was three months—and I am blown away that birth and infants can be such a different experience than mine was almost 30 years ago. grandmag.ca
