SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
From
THE EDITIOR Dear Readers Summer is here and it’s time to put away the dark colours and heavy fabrics in exchange for bright colours and cotton/linen fabrics. Don’t you just love Summer? As always our issues are inviting, filled with rich content with a plan to empower you wherever you are in the world to be Kingdom Minded. Apostle Dr Yana Johnson is our Woman Stepping Out! As she graces our cover this season we talk to her about what it really means to identify and use your gifts to create opportunities in your world. Even though Women Empowering Women Magazine is written for the Kingdom minded woman, we have noticed that men are inspired by the articles published, therefore we have introduced a new section called The Kingdom Minded Man….Who Is He? I think many women need to know who such a man is and how he conducts his life in line with God’s Kingdom. Finally, I am pleased to offer this season’s magazine free to all our readers for the month of August, so please use this time to download the magazine and read to your heart’s desire………….oh and pass it on so that others can also enjoy the rich content of our articles and subscribe for a whole year’s supply.
A Magazine for the Kingdom Minded Woman, Promoting her Style, Wholeness and Spiritual Etiquette.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Dr Yana is also offering discounts on her make-up range ‘Yana Cosmetics’ so don’t miss this opportunity to get the fantastic products on offer. Here’s to you, our readers…have a wonderful summer and look forward to bringing you more in the coming season ahead. Be Empowered, Be Kingdom Minded. Prophet Jacqueline Ani
Be Empowered!
Jacqueline Ani Editor In Chief – Women Empowering Women Magazine
EDITOR IN CHIEF
JACQUELINE ANI
ASSISTANT EDITOR
TAMIKA PUSEY-SQUIRE
magazine@empworedwoman.org.uk www.wewmagazine.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
CONTENTS | SUMMER 2015 SPECIAL FEEATURE PROPHETESS JACQUELINE ANI Go Therefore
6
WOMAN STEPPING OUT! APOSTLE DR YANA JOHNSON Special Interview
10
HER STYLE
18 K B DAVIE Love 24 JOANNE AMOAKO I’m Still Standing 30 JUDY TOORIE Health & Nutrition for the Soul 34 DAVIDA YEMI-AKANLE Your Calling As A Pioneer 38
AYOOLA BANDELE Top 3 Summer Essentials Trends for Your Wardrobe
HER WHOLENESS
44 APOSTLE DR YANA JOHNSON The Who Do Men Say I Am? 51 HARRIET KHATABA The Journey… 54 NOREEN MAKOSEWE Personal Development Training In Africa 58
PASTOR MARIE- ROSE OMOKHODION Winning In Business Through Prayer
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
62 KATE OKOLI In Silence and Dignity, the Cry of the Single Parent 56 FATIMA DENGA Mastering Love 70 DR LEAH AKINLONU Demystifying Autism 76 BELINDA BARNABY When The Clock Strikes 12 82 DAWNIEL WINNINGHAM Know Your Value – Empower Your Finance
HER SPIRITUAL ETIQUETTE PASTOR SOLA DAWKINS The Glory of His Presence
86
LYNDA OJIAKOR The Gift of Righteousness 90 DR T AYODELE Kingdom Nuggets to Dealing with Depression 92
EMPOWERING THE YOUNGER WOMAN LAUREN LAMONT Be You! 96 KINGDOM MINDED MAN MINISTER VICTOR NWAORGU Kingdom Mindset 100 HASANI PETTIFORD Confessions of A Strong Black Man 104 TOKUNBO A. OSUNBAYO The Kingdom Minded Man pt1 108
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
GO | THEREFORE By Prophetess Jacqueline Ani
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Special Feature | 7
T
his is an instruction I keep hearing in
This I believe is no coincidence as the eldest in
my spirit.
my family and my husband the eldest in his
This command is part of the great commission that was spoken to us by
Jesus before He was taken up to heaven to be with the Father. Matthew 28: 19
family, the urgency of taking the baton to develop others, not just develop but ensure that God’s People are prepared for this end time period. I sense an urgency like never before, we need to be equipped as leaders to support and empower
Go therefore and make disciples of all nations,
others, to prepare people for the end.
baptising them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.
Now I see that God has been working in me behind the scenes, so that I am equipped to
20. Teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you: and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age. As Citizens of the Kingdom, we are reminded that we have a work to do here on earth as we wait in expectation of Jesus’ return. There is a shift in the spiritual realm, we have moved into a new season, we’re in a new dispensation and there is an urgent request for us to be in total alignment with the Spirit of God as He brings us in line with what He is doing at this time. I remember in our Summer Issue 2014, I wrote
about passing the baton, my mother had passed away and it brought a sense of responsibility in my life as I realised that I had to step up in my role as a leader (servant) to those who need to be in position for the Kingdom. This year, we’re also saying good bye to my mother in law who passed away in May and is to be buried in July 2015 a year from the time my own mother was buried. This time the call has been for my husband to step up to the role as leader (servant) for God’s Kingdom.
understand His Assignment in my life, because in this new dispensation we are called to take our place and to deliver His Message. He is sending us to go and make disciples of His
people, make disciples of nations, make disciples of those who have been waiting, ready to work and build the Kingdom. It’s no longer an appeal but an instruction, get people ready, prepare them, disciple them so that in hearing God, they will hear direction, instruction to strategize their move into their designated positions to be a light so that God can and will be glorified in their work. We’re in a new season of leadership, a now and relevant word and we must align ourselves with what God is saying and doing in these times. The worst thing is to be out of season, to continue dealing with an old issue or old project when the season has changed. I also discern that the season will open doors of opportunity for those who are focused on operating in God’s Will and purpose for their lives, so we must be in preparation, so that what was declared to us in the past will be seen in the
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
8 | Special Feature present. I believe that the great commission was given to us as disciples/leaders to be equipped with the word, the good news and with our gifts to go and prepare others with what we have learnt.
you’re sent you have the resources available for those who need it. God will always give us a period of grace to prepare for where we’re going. What resources do you need and who can help you prepare them? Being equipped also means being filled with His Word. I have come
How to Move Into This New Season
across many wonderful women of God who are
Avoid being distracted – I see it time and time
hungry for God and want to do His Work, but
again with people that I’ve mentored, coached or
sadly they lack discipleship. Some don’t know
taught, their predominant enemy is distraction.
how to hear from God and some don’t
Distraction takes your focus away from what
understand how to apply God’s word to their
you must do now. Our minds and circumstances
life to solve a problem. The bible tells us the put
can distract us from our assignment. A tip is to
on the full armour of God…what does that mean
identify where the distraction is coming from,
to you? Ephesians 6: 10-18
the enemy of our soul will draw our attention to issues we’ve been fighting for awhile and instead of taking authority we spend time worrying. When the disciples we’re going to the other side, there was a storm that frightened them. Jesus was sleeping in the lower deck of the boat and
Identify your nation – who are you called to? I’ve often said that your nation can most times
be the person who looked like you before you were delivered. What problem have you been called to solve? A clue would be to read Isaiah 61: 1-3.
when they woke Him, He rebuked the storm. Nothing was going to stop them going to the other side. Mark 4:39
Be obedient and Go Therefore – At the wedding of Canaan, Jesus was called to turn water into wine. His mother told the disciples to do
Be relevant with God – we may be concentrating on projects that are out of season, similar to “flogging a dead horse”. It may also be that such projects may not be bad, but rather out of season. It’s important to be relevant with what the Spirit of God is doing in this new season so that you
whatever He tells them to do. The bible tells us that obedience is better than sacrifice and also
that when we obey, we will eat the fruit of the land. What is God telling you to do so that you can enter into this new season and go therefore……? Micah 6:8
are ready to “Go Therefore”. There is nothing worse than praying to God to bless you in the way you want, rather than in the way He wants. Such prayers can make you miss God’s movement in your life at this time.
Be equipped – do you have the necessary resources for this new season so that when
Romans 8:19 tells us that the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God. You are the sons (daughters) of God and all of creation is waiting eagerly with so much expectation for you to take your position on earth to bring a move of God, for a touch from
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Special Feature | 9 God so that they are also liberated to serve God ready for the coming of the Messiah. Go therefore and make disciples of your nation; operate in your authority and bring the light of Christ into your world, transform life’s and be a blessing, that is what God requires of us in this season and I know that He has provided for you to do His will….not yours…..but His!
Prophetess Jacqueline Ani is a life coach, mentor, author and inspirational speaker. She is the founder of Empowered Woman International Ltd, an organisation that empowers women to empower their nation; she is also the programme director of The Mentoring Academy an institution that delivers programmes to transform the lives of individuals so that they can operate in their authority as Citizens of the Kingdom of God. Her mandate is to set the captives free, empower and release to the nations. Prophetess Jacqueline Ani is a prolific speaker and is equipped to raise prophets for this end time period.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Women
Stepping Out With Apostle Dr Yana Johnson SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Marketplace Apostle, Entrepreneur, Coach
Special Interview | 11
I met Dr Yana Johnson through a mutual friend.
WEW: When did you realise that your life’s purpose is to empower others in business?
During our first meeting we couldn’t stop talking, we had so much in common and I really wanted
I noticed an increase in Leaders, celebrities,
our readers to read about this amazing woman
entrepreneurs and people who work in
with such a heart of gold.
Government approach me for Business coaching
and personal mentoring and noticing the successes Dr Yana is a humble, ostentatious woman who
they achieved as a result. I then realised how
loves God and has achieved so much in her life as
powerful my gift is, its impact, purpose and
well as an MBE holder she has received many
effectiveness.
awards to reflect her contribution to society, especially within the beauty industry.
I realised that through my journey, skills and
She is passionate about sending people into the
experience and gifting that not only do I have a lot
market place fully equipped with their gifts and
to offer but I am able to give sound balanced
how to build businesses to contribute to the gospel.
advice and guidance. My experience allows me to
spot potentials and blockages and identify I hope this interview gives you a good insight into
blueprints for success. I am a resourceful problem
Dr Yana Johnson’s world.
solver, overcoming challenges and obstacles with precise strategic and Kingdom principals and
WEW: Who Is Dr. Yana Johnson
discernment.
I was created a worshipper, a creative being and
It is an honour to be called to serve in this way, but
one who is inquisitive for knowledge, philosophy,
it also comes with a great price of both spiritually
art, nature, love and balance in all things.
and physically. Apostles although mentioned as
the 1st Gift is actually the lowest servant level. I was recently ordained Marketplace Apostle
Apostles have great perception and ability to
which is evidenced by everything I have ever done,
establish things in places and in people, they are
leaving behind a legacy and inspiration to those
necessary to get things done physically in the
whom I have served or who have encountered me
Kingdom and empower and teach others. They
in business and ministry.
hold keys of information, activation, impartation and release that once they speak into your life or
As a servant leader and my passion is helping
over a situation release you to the next level.
others reach their potentials, embracing diversity
and global partnering to pioneer and bring transformative change.
WEW: Tell us how you realised your brand in Yana products?
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
12 | Women Stepping! Foundation, Powder Foundation Duo, Eyeshadow Yana Cosmetics actually found me. I knew that the
Trio, fabulous Lip glosses, and Blushers.
UK needed better make up choices and an iconic figure to communicate what ‘Black Hollywood’
The Yana blueprint is to build leaders who sign up
represents as beauty, hair and makeup trends for
to the Yana Business Programme to resell the
the ethnic market.
products as a vehicle to building their business alongside with hairdressing, makeup services, or as
I was fortunate to meet my dear friend Ginger who
a makeup artist.
introduced me the industry of which I then developed a keen eye for colour, excellence and
WEW: So many people have ideas but yet not
makeup consultation as well as other services.
actualised or practised these ideas, what would be
After listening and encouraging many women, I
your advice to them?
provided solutions to the market needs that I had identified.
We need to confirm our purpose before we do anything, understanding the call on our life and
We began with pioneering custom blended
who we are will quickly validate how effective we
foundations for black skin listening to what the
will be in any venture. When God confirms it, we
client required and developing an ability to
have the confidence to step out and the covering to
respond to their needs. This is very much the same
be successful and the grace to attract the resources
as how in ministry we are best serving and
we need to reach completion.
discipline Leaders. Usually with any business venture, is important Operating in integrity, honesty and love, we then
that we have identified the reason why we have
pioneered as the 1st independent Makeup brand in
started and also that we have a clear vision of the
Morleys Department Store Brixton, Allders
pitfalls and challenges. Lack of Finance and fear
Department Store, Croydon and James Selby’s
are usually the two most common stumbling blocks
Department Store in North London, as well as
that can hinder business startup.
small boutique with Makeup, Brow and beauty services under one roof, way ahead of its time
As a Christian business owner, I have developed a
compared to these services being offered now.
strategy to always seek God for the release, confirmation and information to guide me and instruct me in how and what I should pursue and
WEW: What are the various products distributed
most of all know the timing in which to function.
by Yana
Yana Cosmetics has launched the new ‘Beauty for
WEW: What would be a good starting point for
Ashes’ Makeup range consist ing of Creme
them to launch out?
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
14 | Women Stepping!
Your Faith is the best starting for anything because if God is involved, you can expect growth. When you launch out the vision must be clear and you will require self-motivation and believe to birth your vision correctly. I have seen many businesses start up and flop. The long term vision will always keep you focused when you lose steam. Pray, research, Plan, get confirmation and then launch. WEW: You’re a very multitalented woman, how are you able to translate this into fulfilling purpose and building God’s Kingdom? I am a psalmist, entrepreneur, Intl Business Coach, Mentor, mum and have many creative
skills such as; Sewing, Knitting Makeup artistry, Hairdressing, Gardening, DIY due to having creative exposure when I was younger. However, Servant Leadership is the key to success. I desire to build people and see them reach their potentials and I am not afraid to see them excel beyond what I have achieved.
I believe in Dr Myles Munroe’s principal of passing on the baton to the next generation. The skills I achieved from being around elders who passed the baton on to me ensured that I had something to give to the next generation. We all have this responsibility to achieve excellence in our lives and leave behind a legacy. As an Apostle, a lot of my achievements have
dug a well and brought life into a City region or country paving the way for the next person to follow in my footsteps with an example that we SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Women Stepping! | 15
can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. When I meet people, from all walks of life, I am able to discern their giftings, I have great joy in imparting encouragement and equip on how to reach your potential. It blesses me and fulfils my assignment in the Kingdom.
WEW: Explain to us what it means to release and impart the gifts into others? My life is a testimony, when you visit my website, you look and see what has actually been achieved. Without words, the images communicate relationship, love, interaction, help, teamwork, travel, unity. I could get very complex about impartation but I am not
religious. The first starting point to releasing the gifts is to communicate that we can step out in faith and love and use what we have, give of our time and love and empower someone else. Spiritually when God sees you handling that well, you will find that at different points in your life you are actively aware of your spiritual gifts which do make room for you in your life, they are never taken away but if misused are not as effective as they were
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
16 | Women Stepping! designed to be in the lives of others. To impart is
and pull down and utilise the Kingdom wealth
to give, assist or release spiritual gifts for the
for the effective and wise use in fulfilling
enabling of work in ministry to redeem people
Kingdom work both financially and physically
through that gift, for example singing/worship,
with innovation and principals that create and
encouraging/evangelism, teaching/discipling etc
maintain wealth.
WEW: God is raising a new breed of apostles
Marketplace ministers are being stirred and
and prophets, do you think the church is aware
unified. There is a special authority and grace of
of the shift and if not why not?
these ministers to attain wealth with integrity. They have spiritual keys, understand timings and
The bible says that the Prophet is subject to the
have a special grace and understanding to make
Prophet.
global transformations.
I have noticed that in the UK many leaders have not released or ordained Apostles and Prophets,
WEW: What is the next step for Yana Products?
yet they exist and are functioning in their
giftings. many untrained or supported for
Yana Cosmetics has launched the ‘Beauty for
maximum effect in the Kingdom.
Ashes’ Makeup range online in the US, and is signing up entrepreneurs for the Yana Business
The spiritual history of the UK birthed revivalists
Programme, raising Leaders who will retail Yana
and evangelists fully on fire for God. I believe
Cosmetics in their City. The ‘Beauty for Ashes
when we allow the 5 fold gifts to fully arise in the
Empowerment Conference’ is an event that
Churches in their authority in unity the spiritual
encompasses a travelling 1 day seminar with
atmosphere in the UK will shift. We are in a
discounted Makeup on the day and Business sign
season of the Apostolic dispensation and we need
up opportunities.
to raise up the prophetic gifts in people for the outpouring and releasing of those called by God to advance the Kingdom in authority.
WEW: Where can we get up to date information about your cosmetics and other products?
WEW: The bible says the wealth of the wicked is laid up for the righteous and a good man
For more information visit
leaves an inheritance for his children’s children,
www.yanacosmetis.com or Yana Cosmetics Inc
how is this scripture actually relevant to what
on Facebook or email directly to
God is doing with present day market
info@yanacosmetics.com.
ministers? Marketplace ministers are designed to identify
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Women Stepping! | 17
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18 | Her Style
3
SUMMER 2015 Winning Wardrobe Essentials By Ayoola Bandele
Summer is upon us and it gives me great pleasure to share the current trends, report with you. You must have seen them in the shops, in fact I am sure you probably have indulged in adding a piece or two of the new season to your wardrobe. I am here to share the best and timeless wardrobe pieces to add to your increasing wardrobe this season.
There has not been a better time than now to invest in stripes. It's clean, it's elegant, it saves you time and it saves you money, it's also the master of disguise. Clean fashion is the next new thing everybody must embrace. It's less hassle and it creates the right attention. Stripes help you solve the problem of 'I have nothing to wear' most especially on the day you are in a hurry for that ‘special’ appointment.
Vertical and asymmetrical stripes Image Source: courtesy of Myss at mysilhouettestyle.com
are slimming for the curvaceous, well-endowed sisters and mothers. If emphasising your
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
size is your fashion statement,
Her Style | 19
“
Clean fashion is the next new thing everybody must embrace.
�
Image Source: Miss Ghana UK contestant 2014 Photoshoot styled by Ayoola Bandele of MySilhouetteStyle.com at The Regent, North Finchley
wear it again in the Autumn/winter trend. You can dress it up or dress it down. As shown in the images below. Myss wore a vertical skirt to slim down her waist and a horizontal jumper to create the right balance with her maxi dress. Stripes are all about creating balanced proImage Source: Google Images - Vertical/Asymmetrical Stripes
portions of your body shape. If for whatever reason, wearing stripes as a clothing item
then wearing horizontal stripes is your best choice. Horizontal stripes creates a balanced illusion to the eye, unless you want to flaunt your body shape by wearing outfits that emphasises your size, then horizontal stripes is your best choice.
is too much for you to handle, then update your wardrobe accessories in the trend. A lovely pair of stripy shoes is an instant outfit lift, so invest in one.
The best part of adding this trendy piece in your wardrobe is that, it never goes out of fashion and you get to SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
20 | Her Style
Shop Stripes for your body shape with mysilhouettestyle.com
Contact silhouettelondon@hotmail.co.uk for current fashion trends and styles suited to your body shape. Image Source: Horizontal Stripes on thenewfashion.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Style | 21
Florals are a repeated trend. Industry experts and fashion influencers create new floral ,
designs to whet consumer's appetite in fashion every year. Florals are inspired by nature, culture and are appealing to the eye. Florals are to fashion trend as flowers are to wedding seasons. They never go out of fashion just as flowers never go out of season. Have you ever noticed the change in mood, the bright smile and self confidence in anybody wearing florals? That is the secret. They come around in summer and wisp you into a very good mood. Image Source: courtesy of Myss at mysilhouette
Florals create just the right atmosphere around you. Just as weddings boomers create the demand for flowers during its peak season in summer, fashion trend forecasters have analysed this one seasonal trend that changes things and everybody, it is a must have for your wardrobe. So get on board and invest in a timeless unique floral outfit that you can dress up or dress down. To motivate you in investing in florals, check out these inspirational ways fashion bloggers are wearing florals, hopefully you'll be drawn to the best floral pattern for your body shape. SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
22 | Her Style
Image Source: Courtesy of grownandcurvywoman, addictedtoEtsy,
“Denim is one of the world’s oldest fabrics, yet it
presidents, housewives, students and everybody
remains eternally young”, American fabrics
wears denim. It is comfortable, durable, long lasting
magazine writer (1969). It was originally developed
and a really good value for money. Visit
for cowboys and miners due to its lasting fabric. It
www.pinterest.com/silhouettetrend for endless
can be worn for work or for fashion only. It is one
possible ways to wear your denim jeans. For a
piece of clothing you can practically live in. You can
starter, be inspired by the way Africans are rustling
dress it up or dress it down and wear it all year
things up with jeans in the fashion world.
round depending on your style personality. Denims are a piece clothing material that you would not normally dare to wear in the summer heat because of its thickness but this fabric has become a summer trend here to stay in fashion forever. It may have been designed for cowboys and factory workers but supermodels, farmers,
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Style | 23
Image Source: Courtesy of Stylepantry, addictedtoEtsy, lovebrownsugar, Shala Monroque, Ayoola is a seasoned style consultant. She has
Ayoola is passionate about helping people project
worked with highly sought after high end fashion
the right image. She would love to see the minority
retailers in the UK. She has tremendous work
groups in the spotlight having had their confidence
experience as a sales consultant, wardrobe/fitting
built up. Myss has been set up just for YOU. The
room advisor and style consultant at LKBennet
focus is to help you maximise your assets, build
London, Hobbs Ltd and Kew Ltd, three of the well
your confidence and discover your style. Contact
favoured retailers by royalties such as Kate
her on silhouettelondon@hotmail.co.uk
Middleton.
Ayoola Bandele is an image consultant who offers unique services unique and tailored to individuals and personalities. Perhaps you are looking to portray the right image for those special occasions, or you just want to declutter your wardrobe. My services are classy, sassy, edgy, cool, decent and unique. Contact me for fashion and style advice. Are you willing to work with me in becoming the real valuable, unique you? Do not hesitate to contact me. God is able to do exceedingly and abundantly much more than you could ever ask or think of. He is about to do something GREAT. Only if you ask, seek and knock. https: silhouettetrends.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
24 | Her Style
comprehend it fully. We search and yearn for it; yet it seems difficult to grasp and hold on to.
L
. O.V. E. Four letters, making up a single word. What exactly is “Love”?
We hear so much of it, it is mentioned everywhere, and often, we spend most of our lives searching for it.
Love is the most misunderstood, misappropriated and misconstrued word in the history of mankind. We define our lives and relationships by it; yet we are unable to SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
It has been dubbed the “greatest emotion in the world”. Some identify it as a powerful neurological condition; much like hunger or thirst, only more permanent. Others talk about it as being blind, or a “passionate” commitment. Some say it is basically chemistry - a cocktail of endorphins and neuro-transmitting chemicals emanating from our human brains, creating a fuzzy wuzzy feeling.
According to human definitions, Love is a variety of different feelings, states and attitudes
Her Style | 25
By K B Davies
that range from interpersonal affection, to pleasure. It can refer to an emotion, a strong attraction, and personal attachment or a virtue representing human kindness, compassion, and affection. However, Love is not a human creation, yet we continuously attempt to define it. This is why our definitions always come up short, and why we are still yearning and seeking to find or understand it. Love is NOT what we think it is; and this article aims to challenge its worldly perception and definition. We tend to believe Love is a mere emotion; and thus treat it as such. This results in a lot of pain
for ourselves and others. Emotions are ever changing and undependable. If you believe love is an emotion, it will behave like one. It will be transient, fickle, erratic, and unreliable. There is ONLY one “Love�; and it is not a feeling. It is not the nebulous human emotion we feel, nor is it an intellectual concept or a moral imperative. Love is a command from God. It is a choice and it requires sacrifice. It cannot be bought, won, earned or deserved. It is freely given, and not based on what anyone does, or does not do. It is fully unconditional. Love is the one thing that binds the whole of humanity, and indeed the world together. SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
26 | Her Style It is a living conscious energy that we imbibe when we connect to God at Spirit level. This energy is God, and God is Love. It is not possible to talk about Love without talking about God. Simply put, God is Love, and Love is God. Both are the same and cannot be separated. “GOD IS LOVE; and that is the beginning and end of the matter”
You cannot make someone love you, nor can you prevent it. Love cannot be imprisoned nor can it be legislated. It is not a substance, nor is it a commodity. It is not a feeling, emotion, nor does it possess territory or borders. It cannot be contained; as it is a spiritual essence, rather than a carnal essence. The main reason we struggle with the concept of Love is because we are trying to comprehend a spiritual concept with a human mind and worldly understanding. True Love transcends all physicality and the “flesh”. Make no mistake, Love is a spiritual concept. It does not emanate from your brain or flesh. What the world understands as Love is really an insult to the real thing.
Is Love Blind? The world says Love is blind; but this is patently untrue. It is a saying originating from society, and steeped in the patterns of this world. It is simultaneously an oxymoron, as much as a paradox. Believing love is “blind” is simply attempting to do the impossible; and this only result in failure. Simply put, you cannot be “blind” to things you have already seen, experienced and perceived. Also, we see no evidence of this so called “blindness” of love. Marriages are not lasting longer, relationships are not more fulfilling, we
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
are not treating each other better, and hunger and poverty are not declining. Love is NOT blind. It is all seeing. Indeed, it is the ability of true Love to see, but still rise above, ignore and transcend perceived injustices and flaws that makes it such a potent weapon. But this is NOT the same as being “blind”. Love is NOT about accepting other people’s flaws and bad behaviour, or being “blind” to
“
Love is a command from God. It is a choice and it requires sacrifice.
”
them. It is about accepting that whilst these things EXIST in them, it does not define them. This distinction is crucial to make. It is about looking beyond the flesh, and into the Spirit. Christ accepts and loves us; but He does not accept the sin in us, or the darkness in our hearts. He simply loves us; despite these things.
Does Love Hurt? Does it really? Or do we just give ourselves the excuse not to love easily and readily? Pain hurts. Betrayal hurts. Rejection hurts. Treachery hurts. Deception hurts. Dishonesty hurts. Unfaithfulness hurts. Disappointment hurts. Broken Expectations hurts, and human beings hurt each other, but Love does not hurt. It is patient and kind. It is sacrificial and selfless. It does not envy or boast, nor is it proud or vainglorious. It is not rude, selfish or gets upset
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
28 | Her Style with others. LOVE is the only thing that can cover all the pain and anguish and make us feel wonderful. It always trusts. It always hopes, and it always endures.
If you do not love yourself, it will be impossible to love someone else. Unfortunately, whilst most people claim to love themselves, their thoughts, words and actions prove otherwise.
Is Love free?
You cannot claim to love yourself and have negative thoughts. You cannot claim to love yourself and constantly put yourself down. You cannot claim to love yourself when you are constantly judging other.
Love is Sacrifice. Both are two sides of the same coin; and it is impossible to have one without the other. You cannot claim to love, without being willing to make a sacrifice. You cannot claim to love without entertaining the possibility of being hurt. Love does NOT hurt, but the price it cost can. People say God’s love is free; but again, this not true. Just because it is freely given to us, does not mean there was no cost or sacrifice involved. God’s love for us cost him his Son, Jesus Christ. He died for us whilst we were still sinners. To demonstrate the magnitude of his love for us, God decided to sacrifice his ONLY Son; just so we have the benefit of his love brings. That is sacrifice. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” If Love has no cost, and requires no sacrifice, then it should be quite easy to love those who hate us, or indeed love our enemies. Anyone can love someone who makes them happy; but can they love someone who makes them unhappy? Can a husband love his quarrelsome wife unconditionally? Anyone can submit to someone who “deserves” it; but can a wife submit to her difficult husband even if he doesn’t deserve it? Don’t get it twisted; Love costs, and Love Is Sacrifice.. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength; and love Your Neighbour as Yourself”
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
You cannot claim to love yourself and indulge in destructive addictions or have an unhealthy lifestyle. All these indicate that you do NOT truly love yourself; even though you think you do. As most people are unable to love themselves, they are also unable to love other people. Remember, we are talking about the true definition of Love here; and not the simple conditional human emotion. When you are unable to love yourself, you begin to seek love in other people or in other things. You put unnecessary importance into “finding” this love and it becomes something that defines your life. You believe this love is what will make you happy, and searching for love in others becomes a priority, or an obsession. When you truly love yourself, you will not put precedence on finding love in others; for you already love yourself, and you know God loves you. It will simply be a bonus. It will be something that adds to your happiness; rather than define it. You will never have the mind-set that another human being can complete you; because they simply can’t. “You cannot love somebody else until you love yourself; and you cannot love yourself until you understand God loves you”
What people tend to do is put themselves first. This is Selfishness, and not Love. Loving
Her Style | 29 yourself is about awareness of who you are, acceptance of your flaws, warts and impediments; without ANY judgement, and acknowledgement that you can be better than what you currently are. True Love is selfless; as it cannot be confined to self. It is not selfish to love oneself; but it is selfish to love ONLY yourself.
Are There Different Types of Love? There is ONLY one “Love”; and it is fully unconditional. We are simply commanded to love each other in this manner. There is no special kind of love set apart for our loved ones, spouses, children or relatives. It is man that designated different types of Love; and not God When you are able to love yourself unconditionally, it will not be difficult to love another unconditionally. Unconditional Love is not predicated on what people do, or don’t do. It is not based on their relationship to us, nor does it depend on who they are.
good and fulfil something in us. In the world, it is also seen as foolish to love our enemies, or those that hurt us. However, based on spiritual reasoning, we should love those who hate us, love our enemies, and love our neighbour as ourselves, and be willing to lay down our lives for ANYONE. This IS Unconditional Love.
What stops us from being able to love the right way is Fear. They say the opposite of Love is Hate, or Indifference, or Apathy. It is none of these. The true opposite of Love is Fear; and fear is a result of operating in Ego State or the Flesh. It is the weapon of choice for the Prince of This World; for it is born out of deceit. Fear is what stops us from loving. The fear of rejection, fear of being hurt, fear of pain, fear of being vulnerable, fear of the unknown, fear of being powerless, fear of disappointment, fear of others opinions, fear of our own feelings, fear of looking like a fool, etc.
“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends”
When we also see ourselves as separate from others, and thus create an identity that confirms that As human beings, we reserve a special love for separation; this leads to a fear of the “other”. our partners, friends and spouses; all because they However, in Christ, we are all one, and there is no separation. fulfil a need in us. We reserve a special love for our children; because they are ours. We reserve a To love freely takes courage, and Courage is the special love for our relatives, kin, friends, etc.; all antidote to Fear. Unconditional Love is not about because of their relationship to us. However; there loving people. It is about having the courage to die is no “specialness” in Love. All are equal. for them. This is what Love is.
Based on worldly reasoning, we either love those who love us, or we love those who make us feel
Mr Keni B Davies is the Founder of Transformational Power - a coaching and motivational practice that helps individuals, businesses and organizations achieve their visions and exceed their dreams. www.transformational-power.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
30 | Her Style
I’m Still STANDING By Joanna Amoako
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Style | 31
M
y
recollection
childhood memories
of
has of
my
With the passage of time, I came to realise
great
the fact that life is not a joking matter. It
living
a
does not really matter how well prepared
sheltered and protected
we think we are, the journey of life can still
life. I was brought up by loving parents who
throw some surprises we did not envisage
instilled in me Christian principles as well
our way. We are not exempted from the
as good moral values. I had the best
battles that life often presents to us. No
opportunities at my disposal and backed by
matter how much we think we are fortified,
the relentless support of both my parents
there
and great mentors I excelled in every sphere
unexpected circumstances and rigours of
of my life as a young woman. This bubble
life. In the book of Job 14:1, Job cautions us
created an exciting and expectant notion
that:
is
still no immunity from
the
that life was all too rosy. “Human beings born by women are short-lived Everything I so desired seemed to be going
and full of trouble” – (ISV)
in the right direction and falling in place for me. By the time I reached the prime of my
We must understand that for as long as the
life, I had all a woman could ever dream of.
world has existed, adversities, challenges,
I had achieved a high level of education and
trials and tribulations have been a part of
was well established in a fulfilling career
the cycle of life. There are no definitive
where I was yielding great achievements. I
guarantees that life will be plain sailing. I
was very content and happily married to a
experienced this shocking wake-up call in
God-fearing, honourable and remarkable
the year 2009. I can still recollect the wave of
man with the added blessing of two
events as if it were today. Without so much
amazing children. As is the desire of every
as a ‘BEWARE’ alert, the entire fibre of my
woman, I was feeling secure emotionally,
life got hit by a torpedo of eventualities.
physically,
more
Both the lives of my family and I became
especially financially. There was no cause
ravished by a succession of legal battles
for alarm in my mind as the level we had
which resulted in the crumbling of my
attained enabled us to enjoy the blessing of
dreams, hopes and aspirations. What began
material gains. Through shrewd thinking
as an innocent naïve choice I had made a
and good strategic planning, we had
few
established good investments that would
uncontrollable blazing inferno where I was
allow us to live comfortably without
implicated in a scandal spanning across five
exerting pressure on the quality of our lives.
governmental bodies. Overwhelmed by the
Honestly, the future I thought was looking
enormity of the scandal, my life was thrown
very idyllic and blissful.
into utter chaos and turmoil from the
psychologically,
and
years
prior,
sparked
into
an
lengthy legal process which dragged on for
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
32 | Her Style years. I was left helpless and hopeless with no
no money and sanctions imposed on my basic
ounce of strength to salvage the wreckage that
ability to obtain any kind of employment, life
was threatening to grind my very existence to an
had become futile.
abrupt halt. It was just by the sheer mercy, kindness, faithfulness and grace of the Almighty
In my lowest moments when I thought that all
God that I narrowly escaped imprisonment.
hope was lost, God had a bigger and greater plan! Yet again, He rescued me from suicide. In
I was engaged in a ‘fight’ with institutions that
the past few years I have been entangled in
were too powerful to contest. In my view, there
tempestuous battles, but God has fought on my
was no way I could contend their dynamic legal
behalf and delivered me out of them all. (Psa.
strength. I watched helplessly as my reputation
34:19)
was brought to disrepute both professionally and personally. My credibility, integrity and
I have seen many dark and rocky days. Days of
honour were ghastly smeared and ridiculed. I
anguish, of extreme lack and insufficiency, of
felt like I had been stripped bare. The worse
uncertainties and hardships. However, I have
however was yet to come. The knock-on effect of
made it my personal goal never to dwell and
these concurrent legal battles left my family and
wallow on the negatives. Rather, I glory in all the
I penniless. We lost all our material possessions
many blessings that God brought my way. God
except for the roof that was over our heads. Life
miraculously always created opportunities and
became an uphill struggle as we sank under an
avenues to sustain us.
insurmountable pile of debts. With two small children, we could barely afford the daily
The tempestuous storms of life only last but for a
necessities of life.
moment. No matter how horrendous it seems to be raging, be assured that there is a guaranteed
I was managing to endure the strain of pressure
rest promised for the people of God (Heb. 4:9)
from the concurrent legal battles. The threat of
being incarcerated was frightening but I still
I may have lost material possessions, but now I
tried
Losing
have gained my purpose in life. The odds that
also
stood against me was orchestrated by Satan to
destabilising as I faced an uncertain future.
terminate my life but God has turned it all
However, the financial constraint was the final
around for His glory and established me on the
supportive
path of fulfilling my destiny.
to
properties
brave
my way
and
through.
investments
wedge
that
was
brought
the
firm
structure of my life tumbling down. I was at my wits
end.
This
is
when
I
contemplated
Today,
I’M
STILL
ALIVE!!
I’M
STILL
committing suicide as it seemed like the easiest
STANDING!! In spite of the adversities I’ve had
form of relief from the buckling endless weight
to endure, God is now using my testimony to
of pressure. With no career, no job, absolutely
build people’s lives across many nations.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Style | 33 Wherever I’ve had the opportunity to share my
to alter your destiny. Reach out with ardent zeal
story (in much more depth), people are
and faith to grasp the fullness of God’s intended
empowered, encouraged and inspired. The
glory for your life.
books I have published and the articles that I write keep setting a flame of hope ablaze in the hearts of many. God has raised me up from the sinking sand of despair to become a voice of healing, deliverance and hope to the nations. I encourage you too that no matter the trial you are facing today, don’t give up hope. Don’t succumb to despair. There are times when you might be overwhelmed with fear and anxiety, but the question is what will you do with your fear? King David in Psalm 56:3 testified that in these times he would rather focus on trusting in the Lord. The raging, roaring, and billowing
storms around you are only momentary. Stand firm and be resilient as you weather the storms of life. The most crucial message I would like to highlight is that the only reason I was able to endure the afflictions that confronted me was solely because of my relationship with the LORD JESUS CHRIST. He is the only reliable anchor that we can hold on to when bombarded by the vicissitudes of life. You were born with great potential and worth. Refuse to allow life’s events
Enforcing Your Destiny Contending With Your Prophetic Word Have you ever wondered what you are on earth for? Have you ever questioned what the essence of life is? Do you doubt that you’ve enjoyed all that life has to offer? From your perspective, how do you measure whether you’ve lived a successful and fulfilling life or not? These are some of the imposing questions and themes that this book seeks to address, bringing to the reader’s attention the fact that we each have a unique destiny to fulfil. Each one of us has a different pathway. We individually are either to become something specific, be influential in a prescribed domain, accomplish a unique feat, reach a height and degree of immeasurable success and prosperity, be exposed to a peculiar level of recognition – the list is endless. The question is: ARE YOU WHO YOU WERE DESTINED TO BECOME? This book aims to enlighten and empower you to vehemently and fervently lay claim to what God has rightfully declared as your glorious destiny.
Joanna Amoako is a successful published author, freelance writer and editor with a
highly passionate personality. Her debut publication “Keep Your Posture When the Storms are Raging” highlights her sensational story of resilience and enduring faith. Joanna’s latest release “Enforcing Your Destiny – contending with your prophetic word”
is a destiny changing book and a definite must-read. She has also been involved in collaborative projects with seasoned and renowned authors.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
34 | Her Style
Creating
ANOTHER YOU NutritionDiscipleship & Health in Business for your
SO U L By Judy Toorie
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
By Amber Ekomie
Her Style | 35
W
e often hear the term
the soul – which is the mind, will &
emotional wellbeing but
emotions. God wants what has happened in
do we know what it
our spirit, to affect our soul. Jesus wants to
means. One definition
make us whole spirit, soul and body.
says it is “Being able to understand the
value of your emotions and how to use them
Our mind, will and emotions work together.
to move your life forward in positive
What we eat and drink can affect our
directions”. Emotional wellbeing is to be
emotions, our concentration levels and how
rich in health, which means to have a
we feel in our body. Proper nutritional
healthy soul; this is our mind, will and
meals, helps towards us getting the balance
emotions. In order to get to that place, we
in our daily lives. Our daily intake of food
need to spend time in God’s presence daily,
not only help to fuel our body but also to
seeking him and trusting him to change us
feed our mind and emotions, which then
and help us. This is a process that takes time
affects our will and our decision to make
and a daily submission to God of our mind,
right choices. Nowadays we are so busy that
will and emotions Romans 12 v 2. We are
the nourishment our bodies are getting is
not able to do this in our own strength but
not sufficient. We tend to go for the short
with the help of God and his word, we will
term quick fix fast foods such as cakes,
soon be able to replace our old thought
chocolate and fizzy drinks and what we
patterns, manage our emotions and our self-
deem to be the cheaper options financially
will will begin to line up with God’s will for
but nutritional wise and health wise, in the
our life.
long term, this can be costly. Health problems such as obesity, heart disease and
When we are born again 2 Corinthians 2 v
diabetes can end up costing not only
16 we are new creatures in Christ Jesus. It
financially, but also time in medical
can be pertained to when a woman gets
appointments, depleted energy levels and
married, her surname changes. This change
can even lead to affecting the way our
of surname is then documented and
bodies function.
reflected in her personal paperwork, such as her passport, driving licence and sometimes
The foods we eat can also be connected to
even involves a change of location. Our
our emotions and how we are feeling. At
passport changed from the kingdom of
times when we feel low or have not had a
darkness to the kingdom of light, when we
good day, we begin to let other areas of our
became born again. There is a
lives slip. We then start to eat “comfort
transformation process that begins on the
food” e.g. chocolate, cakes, biscuits and
inside automatically, our spirit is
sugary food or drinks. These foods can be
transformed but it is a working through to
high in short term energy but have very little SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
36 | Her Style nutritional value. It has been said that a diet rich in fruit and vegetables can help to improve the way we feel and increase our energy levels. Eating a variety of different coloured fruits and vegetables every day means your body; mind and emotions are being fed a good range of nutrients Listed below are some suggested fruit and vegetables recipes. Feel free to experiment and swap fruit and vegetables around.
Lunchtime Lift 5 Kale leaves 1 braeburn apple 2 carrots 1 to 2 celery sticks (remove the leaves) Small piece of ginger Kale and carrots are good for the bones and eyesight and celery helps to keep you hydrated, whilst apples are known to give you energy.
Morning Energiser 1 cup of fresh cranberries 1 orange
There is a wider variety of fruit and vegetables this time of the year. God is interested in every area of our lives. He is not
½ a cup of fresh raspberries or cherries
just interested in the spiritual but also the
Lemon juice
physical 3 John 2.
Cranberries, raspberries and cherries are high in
Ladies, let us take some time to think about
antioxidants and vitamin C and fiber. These fruits
the foods and drinks that we are putting into
are known to help in the fight against disease.
our bodies and whether they are helping us or harming us.
JUDY TOORIE My passion is to help the Body of Christ to gain an awareness and understanding of the importance of nutrition, health and fitness.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
38 | Her Style
Your Calling as a Need You…
PIONEER I DON’T NEED YOU By Davida Yemi-Akanle
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Style | 39
I
f you have been called to pioneer a work for Christ, you are in great company; God himself was the first pioneer. From his abode in heaven he claimed the unclaimed territories of what we now know as the earth.
“1 In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. 3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. 4 God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. 5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day. Genesis 1:1-4 In this example that God gave as the first pioneer, we see the pattern that is laid for all future Kingdom pioneers to follow: taking light into darkness, having dominion.
WHO IS A PIONEER? The pioneer is a transformational servant leader; they lead the way in the transformation of hearts, minds, communities, cities and nations. They spearhead a new cause. A Christian pioneer advances the things of God, the Kingdom of God. To be a pioneer can mean to be the first amongst many to go into an unknown territory. It can carry the meaning of being the first amongst many who prepares the way for others to follow. A pioneer charts a new course, they claim unclaimed spiritual, mental or physical territories, and they
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
40 | Her Style settle new settlements and ensure that they are
up their crosses to follow Christ. These are
firmly established.
pioneers that were full of the Word and possessed by the Holy Spirit; they did not love their lives to
CREATORS OF THE NEW NORMAL
cower in the face of death.
Pioneers lay foundations; they place down the structures for future generations to build upon.
A SENT ONE AND A PIONEER OF NEW
They build in the now, the things that the future
BEGINNINGS
generations will later deem as normal. They are the creators of the “New Normal.”
A pioneer is a sent one, one sent to pioneer new beginnings. Some Old
Pioneers are visionaries; they see those things that others have not yet seen. They live in a different
Testament pioneers, include Adam and Eve they
world, one that is well ahead of their time and
were pioneers for the human race, they were given
because of this they are most often misunderstood
the mandate of populating the world with their
and resisted by their contemporaries, who often
kind, ruling God’s earthly creation and managing
catch the vision years later.
his resources.
The task of the pioneer is to:
“28God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule
lead the way
open up new territories
Genesis 1:28
break new ground
Noah was also an Old Testament pioneer, and so
initiate new works
prepare and equip the people
establish God’s kingdom.
over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”
was Moses. In the New Testament John the Baptist was a pioneer sent to prepare the way for Jesus to come, his work was fundamental, Mark 1:2-4. Jesus was a pioneer sent to found the Church. And Paul, led by the Holy Spirit, was a pioneer instrumental in taking Christianity into new Gentile territories,
SPEARHEADING AND SACRIFICE God's kingdom in the earth has been advanced
through the sweat, labour and blood of pioneers. These are pioneers that were unrelenting in the face of difficulties. These are pioneers that picked SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Acts 13:2.
Her Style | 41 RECEIVING THE VISION
spirit filled and have the establishment of God's purposes in the earth as their main focus.
A pioneer does not just run, they must first be envisioned. Pioneers receive the vision firsthand
SPEARHEADING AND CONVICTION
from God. They receive this vision in a dream, vision, through a prophetic word etc. The pioneer
The Pioneer must be fully persuaded of their call.
is envisioned by heaven. Their orders are to carry
They must have a strong personal relationship with
out heaven’s desires and decrees, and establish
The Lord; they must "know" God. They must also
God's will in the earth as it is in heaven.
understand that they and God are a majority. The persuasion of the pioneer is what turns them into
Jesus in teaching his disciples to pray taught his
another person, one God can work through. They
disciples a pioneer’s prayer:
must be able to answer the questions:
“10 your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven...” Matthew 6:10.
"What do I believe in?"
"Why do I believe in it?"
"What will I do to defend my belief?"
The pioneer does well to document the vision they receive, so as to have something to refer back to,
meditate on till they become one with the vision, an embodiment of the vision, till the fire of this vision burns within their heart, till they can do nothing else but live out this vision because they have become consumed by it.
They must have to courage to stand alone and speak truth in love in a world of political correctness and globalism that says, “Let's just go along with the majority.” They must have the courage to stand for God, the courage to speak out.
Just as Jesus said to his disciples regarding his vision: "My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work." (John 4:34) and like what Paul said to King Agrippa: "I was not disobedient to the heavenly vision." (Acts 26:19). The Pioneer, although inspired by heaven, is not absolved of earthly accountability. Paul made himself accountable to the elders of the Church for confirmation of the vision. His purpose for doing so was that he wanted to make sure that he was not running his race in vain. In the same way it is often a good thing to have others who we can be accountable to as pioneers; these others should be
I love this poem which highlights the importance of speaking out:
"First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—Because I was not a Socialist. Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a Trade Unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me." The pioneer is revolutionary. They are not content
with the status quo, thus they tend to disturb the status quo, but they make a positive impact as they go.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
42 | Her Style SPEARHEADING AND PERSECUTION
gifting’s, which makes the difficult easy for them as they operate in God's strength.
The pioneer goes through a lot of persecution while they are spearheading transformation. They
Pioneers are seen establishing works in all
are often not understood, as a result they require a
spheres of society e.g. the Church, orphanages,
boldness; this boldness often comes from their deep communion with the Holy Spirit, knowing who they have
believed in, not being afraid of standing alone and having the courage and faith to step into the unknown.
The pioneer leads by example and is a
tireless worker.
They understand that although there are many open doors, there is still an adversary, thus they exercise caution by choosing not to be self directed, and chose to be led by the Holy
Spirit. They understand that in submission to God and to other structures of authorities is their protection.
educational institutions, bible schools, hospitals, social movements, business, politics, sports, the media etc. These are all vehicles that God uses for blessing humanity. However, as a kingdom pioneer, we must not forget or neglect our main responsibility which is souls.
They are tactful. They learn to be wise as serpents and guileless as doves. They resist social and peer pressure, and take it as given that they must be a God pleaser and must often be ready to endure hardship for the sake of the Gospel.
PIONEERING MODELS The models for pioneering vary, as the Holy Spirit
leads, however in my observation of how pioneering work takes place, we see a range of FOUNDING AND ESTABLISHING
trends forming. Some: pioneer a new work and stay with it, others pioneer a work and leave it in
The Pioneer's task, like we have already
the care of others for who nurture it. Pioneering
mentioned, is to establish the Kingdom of God is a
can include starting up a new work from scratch
given area: at home or away. Some will receive
or extending the boundaries of an existing work
the Pioneer, others wouldn’t, however they must
and going into new territories.
never waver at carrying out their Ambassadorial
duties and doing what is right. The pioneer must rely on God’s direction and their God-given
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Style | 43 TEAM BUILDING AND SETTING SYSTEMS IN PLACE God’s visions always include others: Jesus launched his ministry with the calling of others to his vision, the pioneer often needs others to work alongside them to accomplish their task.
The pioneer leads by example and is a tireless worker. Following God's example, after founding a work, they set a team and systems in place for stability, growth and longevity. The pioneer’s desire is to build something that will last, so they strive to build on a firm foundation, which is Christ.
Davida Yemi-Akanle is an Apostle to the Marketplace and Nations, she has written several books on ministry and the marketplace. You can visit her website at www.davidayemiakanle.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
44 | Her Wholeness
Winning in Business TH R OU G H
PRAYER
By Marie- Rose Omokhodion
In this article we will focus on the necessity and power of the effectual and dynamism of prayer in the diverse areas of business transaction.
What is Prayer? Prayer can be defined as asking, seeking and knocking for our heavenly Father to intervene in our situation according to His wisdom, knowledge, light, glory, power and might. In the book of Mathew 7: 7-12 this
process was revealed. “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and
though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the
Prophets.” Prayer shows off the power of God
you will find; knock and the door will be
Elisha then picked up Elijah’s cloak that had
opened to you. For everyone who asks
fallen from him and went back and stood on
receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the
the bank of the Jordan. He took the cloak
one who knocks, the door will be opened.
that had fallen from Elijah and struck the
“Which of you, if your son asks for bread,
water with it. “Where now is the Lord, the
will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a
God of Elijah?” he asked. When he struck
fish, will give him a snake? If you, then,
the water, it divided to the right and to the
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 45
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
46 | Her Wholeness left, and he crossed over. The company of the
has remained pure to this day, according to the
prophets from Jericho, who were watching, said,
word Elisha had spoken.” (2 king 2:19-22)
“The spirit of Elijah is resting on Elisha.” And they went to meet him and bowed to the ground before
We can see the continuous effect of prayer in the
him. (2 King 2: 13 -15)
life of the praying prophet Elisha. He was recognised as the one with the divine answer to the
This scripture reveals to us how Elisha called upon
barren ground and the polluted water.
the Lord God of Elijah and the impact of his cry.
By virtue of prayer the waters got healed and the
The waters were parted and he went over. The
yoke of death and barrenness got broken.
effects of the prayer revealed the presence of the
As you are reading this article I command the yoke
spirit of the Lord upon him and changed the
of contamination, death, bareness, mockery, insults
attitude of other prophets toward him. They came
be broken in every area of your life in Jesus name. I
to him and bowed to the ground before him.
pray that through prayer God will show off His
The outcomes of his prayer revealed the presence
power through you.
of God in him, with him for him. He didn't have to explain, justify himself and convince his colleagues
What is Business?
that God was with Him.
The dictionary definition of business considers
The obvious demonstrated power of God was all-
various angles. Firstly, business is the activity of
sufficient to raise him up and distinguished him
buying and selling goods and services. Secondly an
among other prophets.
establishment that buys and sells goods and
I declare and decree that as you believe in the
services, thirdly a situation or activity that you are
manifested power of God who took place that day,
giving your opinion about and lastly the things
every area of your life held captive, down or back
that you do or the matters that relate to only to
is broken open, release you and you are led to the
you.
place of recognition, distinction that the Lord has ordained for you before the foundation of the
These definitions are equally relevant, however
world in Jesus name.
from the kingdom of God perspective, it can be suggested that business is the establishment of the
Prayer creates attraction
things pertaining to the Kingdom of God according
“The people of the city said to Elisha, “Look, our
to His will in the field in which the Lord has put us
lord, this town is well situated, as you can see, but
to manifest His power and glory.
the water is bad and the land is unproductive.” “Bring me a new bowl,” he said, “and put salt in
“The Lord God took the man and put him in the
it.” So they brought it to him.
Garden of Eden to work it and take care of
Then he went out to the spring and threw the salt
it.” (Gen 2: 15)
into it, saying, “This is what the Lord says: ‘I have healed this water. Never again will it cause death
Jesus knew the business of the kingdom.
or make the land unproductive.’ ” And the water
“And He said to them, “Why did you seek Me?
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 47 Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s You are never alone when you choose to do business?” 50 But they did not understand the
business with power through prayer.
statement which He spoke to them.” (Lk 2: 49)
The proven demonstration was poured out since the day of Pentecost.
At twelve years old the Lord had to remind His earthly parents of His divine purpose and the
When the day of Pentecost came, they were all
urgency of making known the things pertaining to
together in one place. Suddenly a sound like the
the Kingdom of God on earth as it is in Heaven.
blowing of a violent wind came from heaven and
filled the whole house where they were sitting. Today we are the witnesses to the Lord Jesus from
They saw what seemed to be tongues of fire that
the business field where we are operating from to
separated and came to rest on each of them. All of
the end of the earth. It could be an activity we are
them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to
buying and selling, representing and contributing
speak in other tongues as the Spirit enabled them.
our opinions for payment or free and it maybe all
(Acts 2:1-4)
that matter s to our entire life.
God has given us the strategy to win the Business must go together with prayer.
arena of business.
Jesus promised his disciple that when they pray to
The bible is full of instructions for asking, seeking
the father in His name all can be accomplished.
and knocking for doors to be opened. It is up to us to choose the do’s for true successful business life.
“In that day you will no longer ask me anything. Very truly I tell you, my Father will give you
I declare and decree that concerning us, we will
whatever you ask in my name.’ (John 16:23)
choose the good prayer guide from start to finish in your field and experience of business for abundant
Jesus went to promise us a helper from the Father,
life in Jesus name.
in the person of the Holy Spirit, who has become
After being put in the arena that has been revealed
our helper who helps us to pray.
by God as our divine assignment, it is now our responsibility to seek and find the way of the Lord
“They all joined together constantly in prayer, along through His word in every step of our journey for a with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and good fight of faith. with his brothers.” (Acts 1:14)
Therefore it is now time for us to make sure that we are running our business in line with the
The promise is still for today.
righteousness of the Kingdom of God, to make sure
But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit
that all our needs are met by the King of Kings and
comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in
Lord of Lords – Jesus Christ.
Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the
He is recommending us to ask our Father in Heaven
ends of the earth." (Acts 1:8)
to establish the ways of His Kingdom and His will in our businesses as it is in heaven.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
48 | Her Wholeness Personal testimony and encouragement.
We have overcome all our battles by the virtue of
Through prayers of faith in the word of God, my
humbling ourselves in prayer and faith in the
husband and I have been blessed with three
hearing of the voice of the Holy Ghost.
colleges and an immigration firm.
I can conclude by saying that indeed the effectual
I am a living testimony and beneficiary of the
fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.
power and glory of God available through prayers in the field that the Lord has placed us.
Let us keep on praying without ceasing. In this we
Knowing that all the acquisitions of our
will experience the supernatural fruitfulness,
organisations have been conceived of the Holy
wisdom, knowledge, multiplication and
Ghost and by grace, have always given us the
prosperity of God at work in our businesses for
blessed assurance of victory at the end of the
the realisation and advancement of the Kingdom
battle.
of God in Jesus name.
We have through our business seen people come
May the Lord bless you and impart you with a
to salvation; many challenging cases have been
fresh baptism of prayer and fire in the Holy Ghost
won through the immigration firm.
in Jesus name.
We acquired a college worth a million pounds for only two pounds.
Pastor Marie- Rose Omokhodion is a trainer, intercessor, and motivator. She is the founder of Excell International Ministry based on the book of Matthew 25:31-40. She is the founder of " The Ladies of Impact�, an Intercessory Ministry for restoration and revival. She is the co-owner and director of Spinnaker College, Majestic College and Trident College. She is also the owner and director of the immigration firm Bison Management Ltd.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 49
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
New album Dr Yana Johnson
Available at www.yanacosmetics.com
*** OUT NOW ***
*** OUT NOW *** *** OUT NOW ***
50 | Her Wholeness
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 51
Who Do Men Say That
I AM?
By Apostle Dr Yana Johnson
I
give my first-hand account of my experience
by the way he asked his disciples, saying unto
as a Marketplace Apostle, Mother,
them, Whom do men say that I am?
Entrepreneur, Psalmist and Business Ambassador. It all sounds very grand and
The revelation is that not only was Jesus curious
many would argue that titles are not needed at all,
about public opinion while walking through
in fact it’s all God’s Kingdom and we are all called
various villages about his business. Something
under the great commission.
must have happened or caught his attention to trigger this response but also that Jesus was
However, I present to you a revelation I received
interested to know what MEN said about, thought
upon reading;
about or wondered about him.
Mark 8:27 (KJV) And Jesus went out, and his disciples, into the towns of Caesarea Philippi: and SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
52 | Her Wholeness The role of a nurturer, raising up God’s Why would Jesus be asking such a question, the
child but also a ministry leader in her own right,
Savior, the one who came to save us asking for an
teaching her Bible and moral principles, Kingdom
opinion and open to receive one?
and how to master authority over herself and that to which she is called in Genesis 1:28.
Many times we see that Jesus was always talking about His father and The Kingdom, in reference to
We all have been called to the great commission
who he was and what his purpose was on earth.
on earth and our first priority is to complete that
He was after all from Heaven, above man.
which we set out to do, this is success. Raising
However it was on his mind that he was creating
children is like raising up leaders because we
an influence, leaving behind a perception and he
become the spiritual parents and as we have
was checking that they matched up to Kingdom
developed so do they in our reflection and our
expectations. Hence he began to teach of the walk
reflection in God. This gives us the ability to enter
ahead of suffering, rejection and hardship,
careers, businesses and duplicate the Blueprint
knowing that this was to come as his portion.
which is the mandate in making disciples. Our disciples should have the tools to raise others by
Why is this, an important observation?
the time we have finished making a full impact on them.
Even though there was a manifestation of his gifts and his authority, his love and the passion he had
As I developed in my first Church ministry in the
about the Kingdom, Jesus wanted to prepare the
worship arena, I gave everything I had and
people. His time had not yet come and those who
developed excellence. My voice was not that great
had a revelation of him were asked not to tell
even though in the world, I had written and sold,
anyone, because he needed more time.
40,000 copies of my album. After I was saved and my life transformed in Jesus, I received the gifts of
Did they get it?
the Holy Spirit and my vocal ability completely increased.
Not so much as who he was by title, but had they caught it in their spirit that if he is here on earth,
From there the prophetic gifting also increased.
our very own gifts and purpose will too be
Having a relationship with the Father was like
established in the same way as he did. He came to
having a personal guide which established me in
show us and thus the Bible was written under
the Business arena where I Pioneered Yana
inspiration and on account of the reason he came
Cosmetics Makeup and began developing not only
and the impact he left for us to follow.
my team but the marketplace, others around me through influence and quite quickly became a role
Therefore in our relationship with God, we can do all things. Through my relationship with God, my first ministry is being a Mother to my daughter.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
model.
Her Wholeness | 53 Pretty quickly after starting business, I began
It is this assurance that I believe we must all
to win business awards for Entrepreneur,
pursue our purpose and calling. We must seek
Innovation, Business etc, it was a great time as
out the area we have been given spiritual gifts
I had very little knowledge when I started, but
in and know who we are. We should be
that close relationship with God taught me
recognized and even offer our help to others
how to grow, expand, take risks and install
knowing what God has placed inside of us,
excellence and integrity. This teaching lined
because He has done just that, given us an
up with Ministry leadership and sustainability
individual gift within that is for us to use to
of the Kingdom.
help others.
In 2009, I was awarded an MBE for which I
Recently I have heard, seen and witnessed
was humbled by God. At many of my
what low self esteem has done to people, how
business engagements, not only would I talk
it causes us not to reach our full potential, how
about my business but I always managed to
we can miss our calling because we allow
testify of my journey into business and share
others to tell us who we are instead of allowing
some of the breakthrough challenges I had
God to affirm us in what we are.
along the way. I was never intimidated to share my passion and the Love of Christ.
Returning to the UK in 2015; affirmed and ordained as an Apostle was very challenging
In 2011, I was awarded an Honorary PHd,
because many have not yet embraced that
from Roehampton University Business School
these are the last days, God is pouring out on
and at the award ceremony I opened up my
all flesh. The dispensation of the Apostolic is
acceptance speech with a beautiful praise song,
here, the 3rd Reformation is established and
filling the cathedral with worship. I also
among us are Apostles, Prophets, Evangelists,
remember doing this at an event with the Chief
Teachers all equipped in the spirit and being
of City of London Police and he came back to
separated by God. There gifts are evident, yet
me and said he had goose pimples on his arm.
overlooked, many are shut down, shut out and
I believe that we should always lift up the
ignored when the Church greatly needs their
name of Jesus wherever life takes us because
prophets to speak, their teachers to teach and
he in turn lifts us up. Our obedience to do
reveal the mysteries of God and the Apostles to
what he says, when he says increases our
establish not only new Churches outside of the
prophetic giftings and calls us to touch the
building but the true order as God has
lives of many people.
established it.
Apostle Dr Yana Johnson MBE is a Marketplace Apostle, Entrepreneur, Coach www.dryanajohnson.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
54 | Her Wholeness
The Journey... By Harriet Khataba
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Wholeness | 55
T
he beauty of travelling is getting to experience different cultures,
After the death of Ruth's husband and the fact
landscapes, temperatures,
that there was famine Naomi, Ruth's mother-in-
environment people etc... getting
law decided to go back to her homeland she had
yourself ready for the place you intend to visit be
lost her husband and sons the whole experience
it the currency, maps, clothes and many more
made her bitter.
The anticipation, counting the months, years, days; then the travelling day making sure travel
Ruth decided to follow Naomi: now Ruth was still
documents are in place vaccines are taken,
young she didn't have to and she didn't owe
ensuring we you have tour guides verified and
anything to Naomi after all she didn’t have any
anything else to help you in the journey ensuring all areas are covered We seem to understand this in the natural but when it comes to the journey in our assignments and purpose many don't know their destination, are not prepared
What determines us making it, is our
attitudes.
or just don't make an effort to get ready. I say this because I meet many people everyday
children but the remarkable thing is that Ruth
who are not sure what they were born to do or
decided to go with her
where to start from or worse have the wrong attitude or are ready to give up.
Naomi was bitter. Take a moment to think of any time spent with a bitter person, it is terribly
Some have begun their journey but realised their
draining yet Ruth travelled and lived with her,
tour guides can't guide them to where they need
served her regardless of how bad things got this
to go, they either don't have the right ‘clothes’ for
caused me to look at me, of all the times and
the place or maps and strategy let alone the
people I probably let go because I thought I
‘currency’ to use.
couldn't cope with their lamentations or miseryas we like to say that person is "miserable"
Whilst all of these are essential I want to focus on ‘the attitude’ of the traveller......because you can
But this taught me an important lesson not every
have the above requirements but lack the right
day will be a holiday in our lives and journeys,
attitude to survive the journey... As I was
but what determines us making it, is our
studying the book of Ruth, I begun to really
attitudes. It must have been hard for Ruth but she
admire Ruth and saw she had the best attitude I
made a decision, "your God shall be my God your
have ever seen.
people shall be my people" she never looked back
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
56 | Her Wholeness she made the decision and soldiered on she didn't
and wisdom the right job and position without
reminisce on her yesterdays she focused on now;
servitude and tenacity bear in mind Boaz, Ruth’s
she was so humble she got wisdom from a bitter
husband didn't ask Naomi of Ruth’s character he
person. Now I don't know about you but
asked those who knew, those who had mixed,
sometimes we tend to judge people based on their
talked and come into contact with Ruth!
"current" situation and forget they have talents and gifts just like anyone else! She respected
I don’t know what stage you are at in your
Naomi, she was humble, she served, she listened,
journey but we are all somewhere, what's
she had great tenacity and she was blessed
important is your attitude, think about your
beyond her wildest dreams.... She had moved
journey, your life somethings we can't change; for
because of despair and loss now she had the
instance the season, but we can change our
wealthiest most sort after man as a husband that’s
attitude towards it and our perception....
the kind of blessing we want. With the right attitude! The complete package without humility
Harriet Khataba is a profound example of how women of all up bringing’s and creed may find success in all they choose to achieve. Miss Harriet Khataba is currently the owner and chief operator of the “Her Story Matters” (HSM) and www.HerStoryMatters.com. Her Story Matters is an organization, founded by Harriet, to spotlight and support women from across the globe in an effort to provide awareness and support for women to tell their stories and to emerge as a stronger and more successful individual. This effort would not be possible without the experiences provided to her throughout her life and career.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Lest We Forget By Petula Hippolyte Let the love of my heart, continue to
Filled with the curse of jealousy, envy
mirror yours
and hate.
While we paint out our pain and our
On reflection what your words say
abundant flaws,
affects US
For we are joined by philos Love, do you
A sister’s keeper is what we should be,
see it in my eyes
That stands in the gap when you have
Though you may not trust the process,
lost your way
Let suspicion halt and embrace the wise.
A true God warrior is she.
There is no need to compare, by your education and accolades galore As individual as our thumb prints They say ‘less is more ’...
I look at you and you reflect meWe reflect the potential and all the things we could be With a gentle word and a listening ear
Reflecting our God given purpose
Filled with hope, that removes all fear.
Sister we have to rise above, what the world dictates
Written by Petula Hippolyte © March
For what God despises is a haughty
2015
look,
Petula Hippolyte Petula_hippolyte@hotmail.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
58 | Her Wholeness
Personal Development Training in
AFRICA By Noreen Makosewe
Personal Development Training in Africa Such a Diverse Contrast to the Western World. Why?
fighting neo-colonialism. A generation hungry
A
can no longer be denied their dream. From the
frica is standing on the cusp of much-awaited change, its metamorphosis driven by civil society. Whether domiciled
within the continent or spread out in diaspora, Africans are developing a new-found love for their heritage, motherland and its blossoming, yet somewhat troubled, evolution. Many African leaders are yet to grasp what it means to truly love their people and the lands for which they are custodians, as it becomes increasingly apparent that, tired of waiting for decades to be led into its post-colonial promised land, civil society is pushing old
boundaries, challenging old ideologies and
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
for opportunities, brimming with ideas and willing to sacrifice for a more dignified future horn of Africa down to the southern tip of the continent, the last couple of years have seen an over-50% increase in protests and uprisings as the new generation bands together in person
and through technology to tell their leaders, “We deserve better!” Reportedly, 7 out of 10 of the world’s fastest growing economies are in Africa. It’s therefore unsurprising that another international scramble for a piece of the African pie is underway, with the most economically agile taking the lion’s share. What they are taking and how they are taking it is sometimes
questionable, raising the not often asked
Her Wholeness | 59
question, if these markets are emerging from
the core of its society. It’s impossible to ignore
obscurity to recognition, who exactly are they
the countless reports of corruption in the
emerging in favour of? And more importantly,
governance, embezzlement of public funds by
are Africa’s people adequately prepared to
leaders more interested in personal gain than
handle and compete with another influx of
the development of their people, bypassing of
foreigners in search of its resources?
rule of law by those who want results at low or
There is an assumption that emerging markets
no cost, and ‘looting’ of much-needed revenue
are creating opportunities for Africans to
by many international organisations.
become more educated and economically empowered. Though true for the elite and the
“According to a new Oxfam report released in
few with the means to invest in themselves, the
early June 2015, ‘Money talks: Africa at the
reality for the majority is starkly different. In
G7’, G7 based companies and investors cheated
many cases, where good opportunities do arise,
Africa out of an estimated US$6 billion in 2010
expatriates or ‘returnees’ (Africans returning
through just one form of tax dodging. Winnie
home from diaspora) tend to be preferred over
Byanyima, Oxfam International’s Executive
local talent, creating an even bigger divide than
Director said: “Africa is haemorrhaging billions
the one that already exists between the haves
of dollars because multinational companies,
and the have-nots.
many with headquarters in G7 countries, are
Corruption is Africa’s cancer, eating away at
cheating Africa out of vital tax revenues. If this
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
60 | Her Wholeness tax revenue were invested in education and
South Africa, revealed Africa’s aware of its
healthcare, societies and economies would
most urgent need; education systems that
further flourish across the
foster critical thinking, teach the history and
continent.” (Source: www.oxfam.org)
diversity of Africa, explore untapped industries, develop leaders from a very early
G7 (The Group of 7) consists of the finance
age, teach practical life skills and produce a
ministers and central bank governors of seven
workforce that can sustain the growth of the
major advanced economies - Canada, France,
world’s second largest continent.
Germany, Italy, Japan, the United Kingdom and the United States. These economies have
There is also a palpable hunger for high-quality
invested heavily in their own infrastructure
personal and professional development of
and development of their people. Ironically, the
home-grown talent. Unfortunately, this hunger
Oxfam report implies that whereas these
is not sated by currently available education
economies are benefiting from their investment
systems, some deemed irreparably broken and
in Africa, Africa is losing revenue that could be
in need of an overhaul. Many were established
invested in developing its people and
in the European colonial era and the need to
infrastructure. African leaders are not without
review their content and relevance to the new
blame. Failure to uphold and enforce
Africa is grossly underestimated and
regulations that protect resources and civil
overlooked. If Africans are to rise up and take
society has left Africa vulnerable to
their rightful position as the custodians of their
exploitation both from within and without.
continent, accelerated investment in enhancing human capital is required.
International media portrayal of Africa is largely biased towards its failings instead of its
It would be naïve to focus only on training and
potential, often creating an unfair disadvantage
developing young Africans. As well as the rush
for a continent that is coming into its own.
to plunder its resources, the continent is stuck
Discontent with Africa’s half-told or miss-told
in the ‘battle of mind-sets’; old minds afraid of
story, digital platforms such as Think-Africa-
change, new minds desperate for it, and foreign
Thank-Africa by UK-based Sonjo Media and
countries desperate to sustain their own
pan-African media group, Face2Face Africa are
fledgling economies using African resources.
educating the masses on the history, current affairs and future potential of a beautiful and
For Africa to survive, these minds need to
culturally rich continent.
somehow work in synergy. And that can be aided greatly by a willingness to investment
On the up side, change is imminent. The 2015
unreservedly in training and enforcing
World Economic Forum held in Johannesburg,
regulations on how social and commercial
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 61 organisations behave in Africa.
projecting Africa as a ‘begging’ continent, majority of Africans are dignified people with
There are privately-owned training schools
a desire to be the best, do their best and make a
and consultancies operating on the continent,
difference with their knowledge and skills.
which focus on personal and professional
With the right leadership, training, resource
development. Inspired by their experiences in
distribution, mentoring and support,
diaspora, Africans of all ages are returning
developing African countries can and will
home with a desire to use their knowledge,
change their narrative by investing in their
skills and resources to make a difference.
people and giving them a fighting chance to
Institutions such as the African Leadership
compete on the global platform.
+
Academy (South Africa), Ashesi University (Ghana), Agro Mindset Group (Ghana) and the African Leadership Institute (South Africa) are all examples of African-led initiatives to supplement existing education systems. However, more government-assisted
initiatives would have wider reach and also cater to the need-for-speed. Contrary to mainstream media images
Noreen’s upcoming book, EFFORTLESS SUCCESS UNLEASHED: GET MORE DONE IN LESS TIME AND ENJOY IT, shares with professionals and entrepreneurs, practical strategies to maximize productivity and performance in life, at work or in business.
Noreen Makosewe is a Certified & Accredited Coach, Business Development Strategist, International Speaker and Founder of The Radical Success Company (formerly Radical Leap), which focuses on Enhancing Human Capital through coaching, consulting and training. Noreen says that, “Through years of research and experience, we understand that no individual, organisation, community or country can sustain its growth and development without investing in the skills, knowledge and performance of its people. We also understand that without excellent leadership to drive vision, people often perform below their peak or do not perform at all. As well as working in Europe, our work in Africa seeks to addresses gaps in skill, productivity and performance, entrepreneurship and leadership that impact sustainable growth and development. We work with entrepreneurs, professional organisations, educational institutions, leaders and social change drivers, helping them enhance their human capital for a competitive edge in the global marketplace.” .
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
62 | Her Wholeness
Know Your
VALU£ SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
By Dawniel Patterson Winningham
Her Wholeness | 63
Empower YOUR Finances Know your value, CHARGE your worth!
T
here is not a day that goes by that I don’t encounter many women who are not only beautiful, intelligent, smart and gifted, but many of them are also financially insecure.
Their lack of finances does NOT stem from them not working hard; Quite the opposite. MOST, if not ALL of the women I know work very hard. In fact many of
them work from sun up to sun down. They work for their jobs, they work for their communities, and they work for their friends and family. With all of this work, then WHY are women financially insecure? Why are they struggling from paycheck to paycheck? Why are they broke? The answer is as simple as it is complex. Women have been TAUGHT to help others, but have not LEARNED to know their value and charge their worth. We have been taught to sow seeds, but we have NOT been taught to reap. Therefore women are busy. Busy building the dreams of corporations, building the dreams of our families, building the dreams of our friends, while our own dreams lay by the way side. If you are reading this article this may be you, or another woman you know. So please pass it on. And pass along these tips to help YOU know your value and
charge your worth.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
64 | Her Wholeness
1.
KNOW that GOD gave you gifts and talents
to help themselves. Others who CAN afford
for a reason. As proven in the parable of the
my services WILL receive a bill.
talents in the bible that reason is to GO OUT and to make an increase with those talents.
6.
KNOW that poverty among women and
If you are CONSTANTLY being called upon
children is a REAL issue. Don’t wait until
to use your gifts then it is up to YOU to find
circumstances become DIRE to learn how to
a way to CHARGE for those gifts and
EARN with your own two hands.
talents. 7. 2.
KNOW that YOUR GIFTS and TALENTS
As much as you THINK you are helping
have worth. The more your gifts solve a
others without charging, the truth is you are
problem in the world, the more they are
hurting yourself and that individual. You
worth.
are hurting yourself by missing the opportunity to earn income. You are
There are SO many women in poverty who DO
hurting the other individual by not allowing
NOT have to be and women in poverty means
them an opportunity to bless you.
children in poverty. GOD did not create us to live in poverty and it STARTS with knowing our
3.
Don’t wait on someone’s good nature to
worth and charging for it! I am STILL helping
bless you AFTER the fact. People quickly
another child of GOD even if they get a bill for it!
forget who got them where they are today.
My GIFT from GOD is worthy of ME being
Don’t rely on THEIR sense of knowing
compensated.
YOUR WORTH. State your fees up front. 4.
Remember that people have MONEY for what is important for them. People may TELL you they can’t afford your fees. If they REALLY need your help they will find a way to incorporate your fees into their project budget.
5.
Separate COMMUNITY and BUSINESS. There is a distinct difference. There is no limit to the amount of service I provide in the community to those who are unwilling
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
There is NO limit to the help I provide to those in the community. Shoes, Clothes, Blankets, Toys, Food and much more for thousands of people
each year. However, GOD gave me a gift and talents and per the parable of the talents in the bible I have a right and expectation to CHARGE those in BUSINESS that can pay. I count them as two different things. My philanthropy is very different from my business. As WOMEN we have to STOP being so quick to BLESS those around us when we can't even bless ourselves! That is NOT selfish, that is SURVIVAL! IF someone has the
Her Wholeness | 65
means to do it WITHOUT sacrificing their
information or follow me on Instagram, Pinterest
household great for them; if someone is
or Twitter @wealthspeaker or on Facebook at
HELPING and NOT living their OWN DREAMS
www.facebook.com/dawnielwinningham
as a result that is a problem! If you need help in learning how to build your dreams or charge your worth please go to www.iamdawnielwinningham.com for more
Dawniel Patterson Winningham is a former Vice President for JPMorgan Chase and is currently using her years in the banking industry to help women the world over turn their dreams into wealth. She is founder of two national movements, Wealthy Sisters Network (www.wealthysistersnetwork.org) and National Day of Sisterhood. She has been featured in over 50 magazines internationally and travels the world speaking. She is the author of 7 books internationally with 2 launching this fall. She is a single mother of 3 soon to be college students who lives in Katy, TX a Houston suburb.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
66 | Wholeness
In Silence & Dignity
THE CRY OF THE SINGLE PARENT By Kate Okoli
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 67
E
very average woman wants to love and be loved. She longs for that day when she walks down the aisle to say “I do” to the man she loves.
After the honeymoon, comes the reality of the marriage relationship, filled with hopes, dreams and aspirations which sometimes comes to fruition if carefully and prayerfully planned, while at other times, life happens-The intriguing aspect about this is the unknown journey ahead.
If you ask the vast majority of single parents raising children all on their own if they desired to be single from the start, the answer you will get will perhaps change a lot of negative perceptions people have of single parents. If it’s possible to discern the heart of every single parent we encounter on the street, maybe just maybe, we will not have a single story about them. We will be more understanding, more accepting and more sympathetic and supportive seeing that they do the work ordinarily meant for two people. Because this single mum hoped, fasted and prayed for a successful relationship, they become overwhelmed with emotions and feelings of rejection once this journey of love story takes her through unplanned routes of unhappiness. That love which she was promised rather than bring her hope, succour and contentment, suddenly becomes a source of tears, fear, anxiety and despair , perhaps due to sudden death, infidelity, betrayal, rape, teenage pregnancy . The first reaction to this will be tears and disappointment. Each tear shed, makes her stronger and bolder. And so the healing process of having to start all over again, even though sometimes scary and lonely, begins in earnest and a sense of determination and hope, ignited by the fact that there are other budding innocent parties (Children) involved in the whole shenanigans of this unfortunate relationship breakdown brought about by natural causes, or uncontrollable turn of events aka ‘circumstances beyond our control’ As this new journey of life begins, there are chains of mixed emotions, sometimes of resentment, guilt, loneliness, regrets and feeling of rejection. In the centre of this mixed emotions is a determination to give the
children the best. Everything is given to her children including hard work, to meet with their needs; this single mum takes up extra jobs to be able to make ends meet. The journey can sometimes be dark, cold and lonely, as she is judged by society for divorcing her husband despite the dire circumstances she found herself in at the time she made the decision. She becomes the centre of gossip in her community, men actually warn their wives to steer clear of her as they see her as a bad influence-another single story. If she has been made single as a result of the sudden death of her spouse, she is also faced with challenges of having to sort out his estate, being able to nurture and raise her children all alone and also seeing her children through secondary and tertiary education which is uppermost in her heart. The single parent suffers lonely nights with no one stopping to ask her how she is or even offering any form of support. Even when she turns to church for support, she realises that there are very few activities or support networks offering help to people in her status. She struggles to sleep after each day’s hard work, while the song “it is well with my soul …….” Plays through her mind, as she hums this song, finding hope in Psalm 46:10 “be still and know that I am God” As the months roll into years, she strives for that maternal perfection, striving hard to get her children’s approval, most times you hear her say defensively ,”my children are my world …………..” She does not have a work life balance, no time to take care of both her physical, emotional and mental well being. Motherhood becomes not only challenging, but exhaustively unresolved. She has no life outside parenting. Oftentimes, she allows unforgiveness, guilt and regret to overwhelm her. The only way to resolve this or the best hope for successful offspring is attachment parenting. Because the demand for her job slams against the needs of her children, she tries to make up by allowing her children to have whatever they want at all times. She continues to hold on to the word of God as Psalm 4:1 becomes her watchword …..”Hear me when I call o
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
68 | Her Wholeness God of my righteousness, Thou hast enlarged me when I was in distress, Have mercy upon me and hear my prayer….. Despite mastering several bible portions for reassurance, one thing more disturbing about this Christian single mum is that she is oblivious of the real needs of her children. Her faith as a believer has been relegated to an emotional hype about a blessing, to the extent that she now unconsciously over looks the suffering of her children, believing that all her family problems will be solved once she works longer hours and makes more money. She cries out to God knowing that if extended family and society cannot hear or understand her, God the omnipotent who sees the heart can hear and meet her at the point of her need. God does not judge or have a single story about single mums. He is there to listen, to provide and to restore the years that the cankerworm, the caterpillar and the palmerworm has stolen. Psalm 34:6 “I cried out to the Lord in my suffering, and he heard me He set me free from all my Fears……”
God’s message to Moses when he manifested His presence to him was “I have heard their cry and am coming down to deliver my people from the hands of their oppressors”
The unique ministry every single parent has in raising children has nothing to do with how they see themselves. It is an unequalled great ministry. In my book ‘In Silence and Dignity –The Single Mother Story,’ a book dedicated to single mothers all over the world. I catch phrased the challenges of single mums in one word- “Fifty Million stories, unsung…………… As a single mother, God has taken you through or shall I say, He has allowed you go through HELL to refine you. God has allowed various life experiences and situations to come into your life in order to remove all pride as well as insecurities out of your life that would stop you from being available. If as a single parent you are going through situations right now, know that God has brought someone like you out of the same affliction in the past. Your assignment as a parent has a final destination and therefore you must remember God is saying to you that he has empowered you for the simple purpose of getting someone else. Your tears and cries have reached God to the point that he has altered the course of your life, so do not become discouraged or confused to the point of quitting. God is aware of your strength, weaknesses, fears and doubts and that’s why he called you to this great ministry of parenthood………………………………………………… ……
TO BE CONTINUED.
Mrs Kate Okoli is a Qualified Solicitor of the Supreme Court of England and Wales. She runs her private law practice in Barking Essex, London, United Kingdom She is also a published Author of a book titled-In silence and dignity –the single mother story. She is a TV talk show host, a wife and a mother to three wonderfully made children Find new book on www.amazon.com. www.trafford.com.
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Wholeness | 69
www.wewmagazine.com SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
.
70 | Wholeness
Mastering
LOVE
How to mend a Broken Heart. By Fatima Denga
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 71
L
ove is undoubtedly one of the most
expressions of Love which I will outline below.
powerful emotions and feelings
Agape: is unconditional, sacrificial love. It is
that exists on earth.
selfless love, a love that is passionately committed to the well-being of another person.
You may be asking yourself why Love or
In a nutshell Gods Love for mankind or what
so what?
human beings share during national tragedies,
Well it does seem that from time past and up to
plagues or natural disasters and compels them
today, Love is something we have always been
to give love.
fascinated by and have pursued, whether
Philia: the bond of love between friends, co-
passively or actively. Love is very much part of
workers etc. Aristotle described philia as
cultures, races, nations, some species and of
mutual love. It is a necessary means to be
course individual peoples themselves. Love
happy as one chooses to love their friends. It
dominates powerful entertainment industries
can be quite un-natural as it is formed through
from Hollywood, Bollywood and Nollywood
bonding together. Philia love can also end.
to name but a few. Everyone sure loves a good
Storge: This is the love usually expressed by
Romcom and I am certain we can all name our
parents to their children, within families and
favourite love story. The music industry is also
exceptional friends. This love causes us to feel
dominated by ideas of Love, be it “falling in or
secure
out of love” or the notion of the perfect love.
experience this kind of Love. This love is
The hippie movement was founded on “free
committed to its cause.
love” with success of bands like the Beatles in
Eros: This is romantic love or intimate love
that era. We are all fascinated by celebrities’
which can be euphoric in nature. It focuses on
love lives and consequently the most popular
the self. Eros love is what is sold to US by the
ones are the ones who find love with other
media and entertainment industry. It can be
celebrities.
sexual only in nature without the storge, philia
To look at Love and why I sense this is an
and agape. It is the love that can get us into
important topic to discuss, we need to try and
trouble and I might add that it is “immature
define it. I will also explore briefly what Love is
love”.
and
comfortable.
Couples
can
from the academic point of view even though I am no professor. In the latter part of this article
The other types of Love such as Pragma
I will go more into heartbreak, but hey let’s
(enduring love), Phalautia (self-respect) and
start with the good first.
Ludus “butterfly feeling when in love” are not
The Oxford dictionary describes Love as: a
discussed here. You can look into them for
strong feeling of affection.
your own self-interest.
1. Usually towards another person
(Seven Kinds of Love #southbankoflove
Or 2. towards something
Origins Of Love
LOVE is experienced and expressed in various
You may or may not be a follower of God .You
forms. The Greek language was very rich in
either believe in Jesus, disbelieve in him or are
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
72 | Her Wholeness intrigued by the man Jesus, but please hang on
gain or reward for you at the end?
and see God’s original idea of Love. Judge for
Are you able to give love without judging,
yourselves the world’s view of love and God’s
especially where the person has wronged you
view of love, I am passionate about this topic as
or perhaps love a marginalised person?
some of my greatest errors and mistakes in life
Are you not challenged with giving love at
are mainly related to love and how I
times, as you may not feel it?
experienced
I
Are you able to love others especially where
discovered the mind-sets about love that I had
you grew up without being told you are loved
which held me captive to a false notion of love.
or never being good enough?
In the bible, a writer named John( 3:16) wrote
Do you experience love fully to the extend you
about God’s plan for mankind and our
desire it or you have had to compromise
keyword is in that verse. It says,
yourself each time just so that you get love? Is
“For GOD so LOVED the world that he gave
it real love?
his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth
God loved all of us as we are his creation. God
in him should not perish, but have everlasting
as a father wanted to reunite IN LOVE with his
life.”
children and therefore sacrificed his BELOVED
“God is love” 1 John 4:8 and he demonstrated
son for our greater good. God Loved us and
his love for us through the sacrificial death of
we can only be truly fulfilled in the love walk
his own Son Jesus Christ for us to be reconciled
(with all peoples), if we know and understand
back to him and experience his love again. I
HIS love. God’s love is greater as it LOVES
am sure you have all heard of “separation
without measure and loved us as we are. GODs
anxiety” where children separated from their
love never discriminates.
parents struggle to fit in and accept being
To Love we have to be giving of ourselves
loved. It is the same thing, you cannot fully
which
walk in total Love and embrace love from
Vulnerability can bring weakness, so we need
others without experiencing all of God’s love
to know why we are choosing to love and
who is our Father in you. Every other love will
understand where our own love feelings are, so
always be a counterfeit of the GODs Love.
we can shield ourselves from the risks of being
God, through time tried to see if man could
vulnerable when giving love. To love involves
save themselves but each time our human
our minds first but
it.
Through
revelation,
causes
us
to
become
vulnerable.
weaknesses prevented this. Be honest with yourself as you answer,
God calls us to love him first. As humans we
Are you always able to love sacrificially,
have replaced the Love of God with material
unconditionally to every living person known
things, things that do not last. When these
to you, that you are willing to sacrifice yourself
things are no longer there or no longer satisfy
for them?
us, what do we do? Most people feel unfulfilled
Are you able to love selfishly when there is no
as that which they loved, either let them down,
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Her Wholeness | 73
did not go as planned or sadly did not love them back. Most people’s reactions are either: Sadness, anger, hurt, heartbreak, loneliness and for some revenge seeking
depending on
Know what love is when we see it and encounter
it,
to
avoid
the
pitfalls
and
vulnerabilities of getting our love abused or
the love lost.
taken for granted. Love is not manipulative
The world has taught us to always be
and one can smell “love abuse “ from afar once
searching for love in things, objects, jobs, other
they know that love is selfless and self-giving
people, relationships, status etc. So we have all
and run for it where love is used with
learned that when we need love, we need to fill
blackmail, dominance and manipulation.
a void and find something to make us happy. Since when did happiness equate with Love?
Know where to find love that is satisfying,
The world’s solution is usually things that
Agape love. To all ladies, you do not need to
corrupt our hearts and minds even more. Some
sleep with him to show him that you love him.
use sex as a tool to look for love and sadly it
That should tell you there is no love there.
usually does not work and leaves an even
Friends who truly love will be there even when
bigger void as ‘Eros love’ builds a false
you are at your lowest ebb.
connection that never lasts unless it is tested and matures to philia, agape and storge love. God has shown me in my own life and my
The real issue is that we have all placed our
own mistakes in love that to experience true
trust and hope for LOVE in worldly perishable
love; we have to know HIM first and through
things and in other people. Unfortunately it
knowing HIM we will know:
has resulted in being the major cause of most
How to love ourselves first, whether we are
of our hearts being broken and cause of our
loved by others or not. You cannot truly
dissatisfaction. Unfulfilled love, whether not
appreciate love and experience it if you do not
met in childhood or through general love
love yourself. It is very difficult to convince
abuse is now one of the major reasons for our
someone that they are loved if they think they
sadness,
are unlovable.
Heartbreak itself produces emotions, mostly
loneliness
and
unhappiness.
bad as in general heartbreak is a negative How to love others. You can only truly love
feeling. Strongholds that hinder progressing in
others when you experience the value and
our love walk are often formed from this.
worth of love in you and in others. As I said it
Typically heartbreak produces the types of
makes us vulnerable, so to love others one has
emotions mentioned above such as:
to be able to overcome the vulnerabilities of
Rejection, resentment , hurt, anger, sadness,
being rejected but continue to walk in love
feeling
towards others.
revenge seeking, apathy, depression and lack
numb,
bitterness,
unforgiveness,
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
74 | Her Wholeness
of hope or lack of belief in finding love again,
He promises us victory over our emotions. He
heartache, anxiety….
promises to heal our past hurts and to help us
Walking in love towards others is a big
with future hurts so we conquer all negative
challenge and only the Love of God in us can
feelings and emotions. We will not be in
help us do this. Most people say ‘but I love my
bondage or enslaved to them again. He gives
partner and don’t need God’, but if I ask them
us a hope. God is saying do not struggle on
if they can love their enemy they state it is
your own. He knew you from creation and he
impossible or difficult. In fact they give reasons
has great plans for you. Come to him and he
why they cannot love their enemy or those that
will gladly restore you to Love and be loved
hurt them. Well, that’s the difference as Jesus
again. You will have joy and peace and never
even loved those that put him to death he died
struggle for love by being sorrowful. To believe
for all men so we can experience the love of
again
God and give it to those that also hurt us. The
heartbreak and not fear it. You will learn to
Love of God in Jesus Christ his son gave to the
love again, love yourself and others and never
world without receiving. Think on that very
be afraid of the heartbreak. God’s love
profound act of love!
overcomes rejection and it is bigger than any
In Him is total fulfilment.
rejection you have ever faced. Give yourself to
In him is the fullness of joy.
God and embrace his total love.
for
that
In him is the peace that surpasses all
which
you
caused
you
+
understanding.
Fatima Denga Is an ex-mentee of what is now the Leadership for purpose programme. She graduated 3 years ago. She works as a registered Intensive Care Nurse/Practice Nurse but has interests in fashion styling and image consultancy. Fatima will be joining Jackie’s team in the Leadership for purpose programme. She has a blog where she shares what God puts on her heart to help people deal with negative emotions, negative feelings, loss of identity and instead be restored to JOY in the Lord. To check out her blog go to: cumiarise.blogspot.com To contact Fatima you can e-mail her at cumiarise@gmail.com
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Demystifying
AUTISM
A Kingdom Solution to a Misunderstood Disability By Dr. Leah Akinlonu
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 77 What makes people with Autism so
Arlo's communication. His interactions are also in
'different'?
keeping with the preferences of a person with Autism. And he has distinct patterns in
Arlo's story.
his routines and interests.
Arlo is a young man who is aged 19. He lives
These 3 features of Autism are referred to as the
with his parents. Arlo has limited verbal
triad of Autism: impairments in communication,
communication. He mostly uses signs and
interactions and interests.
symbols (Makaton). Arlo loves to sit in his
favourite chair and write lines of numbers. He
Autism is a lifelong developmental disorder that
gets anxious around groups of people, or with
affects how we communicate with, and relate to
new faces. In school he had just one friend. Three
others. It affects how we make sense of the world
weeks ago, Arlo completed his final year at his
around us. People who have autism tend to
special needs secondary school. It had taken Arlo
like routine, order, and sameness. They may have
years to settle in to his secondary school when he
special interests. There is often a dislike of
first started, but when he did, it became the
excessive sensory stimuli –bright light, and loud
highlight of his week. Arlo enjoyed getting on the
sounds or high volume music.
school bus at 8.15 every morning, and liked his
There is what seems like a social disconnection,
teacher. For the past three weeks since Arlo left
where people with Autism may appear either to
secondary school, he has been very unsettled. At
be uninterested in, or unable to understand, social
8.15 every morning, Arlo bangs his
interactions. The world can be a confusing mass
head repeatedly on the table. And he has been
of faces and events. This struggle to make sense of
taking his shirt off. Arlo's parents have also
the world can make people with autism anxious.
noticed that he has less of an appetite for food.
Things that people take for granted such as body
They are quite worried about him.
language and metaphor can be confusing for a person with Autism. And there may be a high
Arlo has Autism. "But he sounds nothing like
pain threshold – a higher than average capacity to
someone else I know who has Autism" you might
withstand physical pain.
be thinking. Or maybe there are some similarities....
Now, note this: Autism is not a mental illness. Autism is a disorder but it is not an illness.
What is Autism really? Let's have a look at the concept of Autism, the
Let's go back to Arlo and look at how the triad of
features, how they apply to Arlo, and to other
impairment applies to him. Let's look at his
people who have this diagnosis, and how you can
communication, interactions and interests.
offer or receive practical support using my
PQRST Autism Support System.
Arlo has limited verbal communication. He has a preference for routines and sameness: sitting in
There are features that stand out in
his favourite chair, writing lines of numbers,
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
78 | Her Wholeness getting the bus at the same time every
use structured assessment tools.
day. Disruption of his routine caused Arlo a lot of distress and he began to head-bang. And
How common is Autism? 1 in 100 people
Arlo prefers to keep his interactions with others to
are affected. In the UK there are 700,000
a minimum, so that he is not overwhelmed.
people with Autism.
Autism as a Spectrum.
So, have they got Autism?
Autism is a spectrum condition. Whilst there are 3
"Well I know someone who is very routine-
core areas of difficulty, every individual with
bound, could they have autism?" Or "There's
autism is affected in different ways. Some have
another person I know who does not like to
been to university and hold down jobs. Some
communicate much or who keeps to themselves.
need a life time of specialist support.
Could they have Autism?"
Asperger Syndrome is a form of autism in people with average or above average
It is important not to equate the presence of
intelligence. People with Asperger
features from the triad to a diagnosis of Autism.
Syndrome may have fewer problems with speech,
Let a professional conduct a full assessment and
but may still have difficulty processing and
come to a conclusion.
understanding language. People with autism often do not look disabled or
Dr. Leah's PQRST Autism Support System.
impaired, and people with autism may find that
"How can I support someone who has Autism?"
they are misunderstood.
Here's my PQRST system that you can apply to support someone who has been diagnosed with
A few quick facts.
Autism: These factors help you offer support in a
What is the cause of Autism? Genetic and
way that is less likely to cause disruption and
environmental factors may account for
distress.
changes in brain development. It is not caused by a person's upbringing or
P: PREDICTABILITY & PURPOSE.
their social circumstances.
Predictability: keep things predictable and concrete. Explain things using the 'here and now',
Is there a cure for Autism? No. But there are
rather than referring to abstract time scales.
interventions that enable learning and development.
Purpose: give simple explanations of the purpose of events and actions.
How do you diagnose Autism? Specialist
Professionals take a specific history (asking
Q: QUESTIONS & QUIET.
questions about development) and
Questions: Don't be caught out when things don't
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Wholeness | 79 go according to plan! Anticipate & prepare by
TALENT: Support to develop their talents,
asking yourself questions to help you come up
strengths and areas of interests.
with a plan B in advance. Be responsive –also seek support promptly in times of crisis.
What to do next? If you or someone you know is affected, you may
Quiet: Avoid sensory overload –noisy
wish to:
environments and bright lights. Avoid social
overload –from crowds, and sometimes groups.
Consider 1 to 1 work.
Get more information on The National Autistic Society website: www.autism.org.uk
R: RELIABILITY & ROUTINE. Reliability: people who provide support need to
be dependable and prompt with time-keeping. Routine: work with the individual to build a personal routine of activity that suits their
Take Dr. Leah Akinlonu's Course 'Understand Autism' on www.udemy.com
Speak to your GP about referral for assessment and diagnosis.
needs. A visual timetable may be helpful.
Hope. S: STRUCTURE & SAFEGUARDING.
Remember that you do not have to be
Structure: develop structured care that works
overwhelmed navigating through a confusing
around the individual's needs. Be proactive -seek
world. Everyone can understand Autism.
support as early as possible -health, education,
Everyone can take steps to maximise the
social care, employment, accommodation.
differences and strengths of a person with Autism.
Safeguarding: protect their welfare and be alert
And as a kingdom person, take advantage of the
to guard against exploitation –physically,
professional help and resources that are on offer,
sexually, emotionally, and financially.
but beyond that, trust in The Lord our God for wisdom. He is able to bring fullness of joy to
T: TRANSITIONS & TALENT.
every life.
TRANSITIONS: Be prepared for major
Every person with Autism can be loved
changes such as end of school year, going on
and supported to be their best.
holiday, moving house, change of job, etc. Make clear and thoughtful plans.
As I always say "For a safe today, and a sound tomorrow."
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
80 | Her Wholeness
Dr. Leah Akinlonu Onah is a Christian and a Consultant Psychiatrist based in the UK. She believes that every person needs a 'Safe today and a sound tomorrow.' Her expertise is in supporting you to turn mental health risk into recovery. She provides you with simple and practical courses & resources, to reduce risk and enhance recovery in mental health. Dr. Leah takes complex concepts, and illustrates them in a way that resonates with you. And she loves to tell stories...and change stories! She is the Founder of 'Riscovery' which means to 'turn risk into recovery.' Riscovery resources include online video training on Udemy.com, and her FREE signature Course 'Understand Mental Illness.' Dr. Leah is married to Toks Akinlonu and they have 2 lovely children. Make your Discovery, get Riscovery! at www.riscovery.org; as Dr. Leah says "For a Safe Today and a Sound Tomorrow."
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Wholeness | 81
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82 | Her Wholeness
WHEN THE
Clock Strikes 12 By Belinda Barnaby
I
s it not funny how life has a way of giving us a pause, just like Cinderalla had while she danced with Prince charming? Of course, the clock had to strike 12 midnight. Even though the music had not stopped, it had stopped for her and she was back in her maid clothes. That was just how my life had been rudely interrupted in June 2012. One moment I had discovered a lump underneath my right breast, I was at the doctor’s the week after, referred to hospital immediately, mammogram, biopsies, ultrasounds, until I
found myself waiting alone in the consulting room for that dreaded chat with the oncologist. Such chats were meant for the person next door or people I didn’t know. Or was it? Of course it was going to be benign. The news came crushing not long after. I had been diagnosed with stage 3 Triple Negative breast cancer, which was not a common strain so had to be treated with all aggression. Neither did it respond to oral medication. Alas! My clock had struck 12 midnight. I went from being brave to being anxious sometimes especially after one of my
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Empowering the Younger Woman | 83
colleagues at work had talked about a fund raising event for The Christy hospital, where I was to start my cancer treatment. That day my faith wavered. The devil started to tell me about how serious my predicament was. In fact my stomach was in knots. Before I went to bed that night I told God how afraid I was. I had a dream that night which was surprising because I hardly dream and if I do, I forget before I wake up. I have always attributed this to maybe too much eating. In the dream I
saw a child peering with look of mischief from behind her mother while holding on to her cloth. It is just like when kids play hide and seek and hide behind their mum or dad thinking no one can see them. As soon as I woke up I knew I was that child. As tears of joy ran down my fat cheeks, the Holy Spirit reminded me of several scriptures which I blurted out. ‘You are my hiding place’ (psalm 32:7), ‘My shelter in the storm’ (psalm 55:8), ‘My refuge and my fortress. My God in whom I
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
84 | Her Wholeness
trust’ (psalm 91:2). He had met me at the point of my need and had spoken to me in the language I understood. I knew that as long as I held onto Him I will be safe. This revelation cured me of all my fear and gave me so much peace. I was ready for the journey ahead. The next few weeks came with a flurry of activity. My sister who was more than my right hand woman was on a quest to make sure I was at my best. Not only did she laminate healing scriptures for me to place all around my home, but also made sure I would be decked out in the most beautiful scarves in preparation for my hair loss during chemotherapy. Her theory was if you were going to lose your hair, then do it in style. Indeed my God had provided me with all things that pertained to life and godliness, even the material things. Before I was given my treatment plan the lump was measured and it was 5cmx3.5cm. I was to have 6 cycles of chemotherapy with the aim of shrinking the tumour a bit before surgery, (lumpectomy) and radiotherapy. The lump was to be measured midway into chemotherapy and at the end of chemotherapy. I had made up my mind to use God’s treatment plan which I discovered when
Olive .
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
I read a book Amma had ordered for me, written by Doddie Osteen and entitled ‘Healed from cancer’. This treatment plan was based on Proverbs 4: 20-22 which say‘ My son, pay attention to what I say: turn your ear to my words. Do not let them out of your sight…….for they are LIFE to those who find them and HEALTH to one’s whole body’. I had just caught on to this plan. I confessed God’s word like I was taking medication but unlike orthodox medicine there is no overdose with God’s word. In fact, the more the better. Hebrews 4: 12 (The word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.’) also put a different spin on it. It taught me that God’s word literally was able to penetrate any part of the body and that there were no barriers. I begun to thank God that his word was penetrating into every cancer cell in my body. If the power that raised Jesus from the dead also lived in me, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to my mortal body because of his Spirit who lives in me.(Romans 8:11) I realised that God was + prepared for every situation we would ever
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86 | Her Spiritual Etiquette
The Glory
OF HIS PRESENCE By Sola Dawkins
I
wonder how we truly perceive the
We must pause and ask ourselves the
presence of God.
question, what is this presence that we refer to
With our lives being so busy, our minds being consumed with demands,
as ‘God’? His presence is affirmatively and infinitely
expectations, goals and targets. Our lives
expressed as Omnipotent, Omnipresent &
rarely feel our own as we have a myriad of
Omniscient.
demands placed upon us, by society and not to mention the ones we place on ourselves. God is Omnipresent, but do we really feel How easy, is it then, for us to live short of the fullness of God.
Him, do we really have a sense and understanding of His presence. To speak of
How easy is it for us to never fully experience
and to hear of God’s presence is one thing, but
the tangible presence of God.
to personally experience God’s presence, is to be our desire. God is omnipresent, His glory filling the whole universe. God is everywhere
But with life becoming increasingly demanding, evolving at a rate we often struggle to keep up with, we may find our personal time with God becoming less
and is present to every person. But the personal knowledge of that fact and the experience of that presence is what finally really counts.
intimate and as life strives to pull us away, there’s never a time more pressing then now, to acknowledge His presence.
How therefore, is it possible for us not to perceive this immutable presence. The most
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literate and eloquent cannot fathom or express with mere words this ‘Presence’ and whilst we define it as Powerful, it can never be contained to just ‘Powerful’. This ‘Presence’ is able to
outer court. To simplify this we are to move through the dimensions of God, by applying that of Matthew 7:7-8.
mould itself into any and every situation and circumstance whenever and however it should occur.
The dimension of asking, must propel you to a dimension of seeking God, which will propel
you to a dimension of knocking, as you enter into the dimension of knocking, doors open We are familiar with the term “The Presence of God”, but what is His Presence, Is it a feeling, a sensation, an emotion, an expression, or is it
revealing to you the Glory off his presence. You can only enter in, once you have knocked and the door has been opened.
something that is unique, indefinable? "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you The presence of God is indescribable, but yet is tailored to humankind, who in essence are ‘One’, yet exist as millions of vessels.
will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. "For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.…(Matthew 7:7-8)
Are there dimensions to the presence of God? Is there a difference to being in His presence and
The glory adds weight to the presence of God,
experiencing the Glory of his presence? Yes
it reveals to you the dimensions of God. It is a
there is, it’s about experiencing Him in another
glorious place to dwell.
dimension.
The Glory of the presence of God is revealed
There is a divine dimension associated with His
throughout scripture, we draw reference to the
presence.
Old Testament, whereby the children of Israel
This dimension takes the limits off. It stirs up faith, strength, provides wisdom, gives boldness etc.
had a pillar of fire by night and a pillar of a cloud by day. “And the LORD went before them by day in a pillar of a cloud, to lead them the way; and by night in a pillar of fire, to give them light; to go
We must seek to access the limitless power of
by day and night:” Exodus 13:21
God, this can only be done by seeking an inner court experience with God, where all frustrations, reasoning, questions, persuasions
The glory in scripture is often referred to as
and all fleshly desires and needs being left in the
descending upon, entering in, as an experience
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to be encountered. The book of Ezekiel provides a detailed account of God’s glory.
The God of glory Himself now lives in us. When
The Glory of God is tangible but cannot be
His glory descends, it is not only around us, but
manipulated or introduced by a specific order.
the Holy Spirit lives in us, permeating every fibre of our being. And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed
The seraphim’s in Isaiah 6:3 cry out: Holy, holy,
holy is the Lord Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory.
into his likeness with ever increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit (2.Corinthians 3:18).
As we walk through our purpose, we must seek to have His Glorious presence.
We need to grasp as Kingdom empowered women, that God has imparted and deposited
His glory brings the intensity, power and
His Spirit in us and therefore we are to prepare
tangibility of His presence beyond the every day
our vessels to manifest the Glory of God.
experience.
The Glory brings a reality of God’s presence to the human individual.
The glory is “the revelation of the presence of God. It is the manifestation of His presence.
May the glory of His presence manifest through you, let it be drawn from deep within, with
Moses had an intimate relationship with God,
power and might.
Even though he tasted of God’s glory, he still
The glory is the very essence of his presence the
asked God to show him His glory (Exodus 33:18).
manifestation and revelation of His love for us,
That is quite remarkable, considering all Moses
his power and His promises.
had seen, more than any other living being before. Yet God was pleased by his request and granted it.
He is Glory.
Sola Dawkins is a Mentor, Motivational & Inspirational Speaker & Co-Pastor. A dynamic visionary and woman of faith, Her vision is to see women of every calibre find their purpose and live it, a vision that is already transforming lives. Sola like many others was trudging along in life, often searching but not sure what for. She had the desire to achieve, but could only see the possible failures not the inevitable successes. Sola began a journey of finding the meaning to life and seeking what is life’s Purpose.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
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9090 | Her Wholeness | Wholeness
THE GIFT
Of
Righteousness
By Lynda Ojiakor
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
F
or if by one man's offence death
We cannot earn God’s righteousness by our
reigned by one; much more they
works or by keeping the law. It is only received
which receive abundance of grace
by faith in Christ Jesus.
and of the gift of righteousness shall
reign in life by one, Jesus Christ.) Romans 5:17
Some
of
my
benefits
of
having
God’s
righteousness includes:A gift does cost something but not to the one who receives it. If you gave me a gift and asked
l have a new identity. The old nature of sin is
me to pay for it, it wouldn’t be a gift, but it did
dead and I have the nature of Christ. 2
cost you something.
Corinthians 5:17 I am not a sinner saved by grace; but a saint
Righteousness means having right standing
living by grace. I am the righteousness of God
before God. God made righteousness available
in Christ. 2 Corinthians 5:21
to you and me as a gift. We cannot earn it, or
I now reign in life by faith in the living Jesus.
work for it, but we can receive it by faith in the
Romans 5:17
finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross.
I
But why is that? The scripture says; “ For all
righteousness and protected from oppression
have sinned, and come short of the glory of
and terror. Isaiah 54:14
am
henceforth
established
in
God’s
God, Romans 3:23, this means we cannot be restored to a right relationship with God
What a blessing to know that our righteousness
through our self-efforts due to the impact of the
is a gift which is received by faith. Have you
original sin of disobedience by Adam & Eve.
received this free gift? If not you can simply
Isaiah 64:6 says; “All our righteousness are as
receive it by asking and accepting Jesus into
filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our
your heart by faith.
iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away”.
Such act of faith releases the abundant life and ends a life of self-efforts to earn God’s
Hence, the gift of righteousness is only made
righteousness.
available through the death of Jesus Christ. Hallelujah!
Lynda Ojiakor is the Founder and Chief of Operations at Women of Faith Today, Harrogate, North Yorkshire, United Kingdom. She is a Life Coach, Author and Speaker. Lynda’s passion is to help every woman find fulfillment by embracing her God-given purpose; and live life to the full. She has over the last couple of years developed some life transforming programs like Faith For Purpose Program, The Real You, Dare To Dream and LVC. These are some of the tools Lynda is using to impact the lives of her audience and clients. Lynda is married to Benny and they have three blessed children. For upcoming events, pls visit : http://www.womenoffaithtoday.com/#/about-us/4548107845 or follow Women of Faith Today on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Women-of-FaithToday/194133200645644 SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
92 | Her Spiritual Etiquette
D
epression ? Featured in a
heart marked with persistently sad mood,
Christian magazine? Yes!
loss of enjoyment of usual pleasures and
Contrary to popular views in
company of life; and undue fatigue. A friend
the pulpit and pews,
of mine who has been there, fought it and
depression is not a baby boomer or
has a trophy of victory describes depression
millennial generation predicament. It existed
as “life losing its taste”. The three core
back in bible days and remains present both
features need to be present for at least two
among the sheep and shepherd today. What
weeks before a diagnosis is made.
other clinical condition so perfectly typifies Job’s and David’s account of their morbid
Many times, there are associated features
grief and sorrow when they described “my
such as anxiety attacks, sleep disruption,
skin cleaves to my bones” and being “laid
poor or excessive appetite, weight loss, poor
low in the dust”? It’s a bitter pill for our
concentration, loss of drive and libido.
minds to swallow that Christians can and
Feelings of guilty, worthless, helpless and
sometimes do battle depression.
hopeless commonly culminate in death wishes or even suicidal thoughts. In its most
Much of the challenge the condition presents
severe form, depression is associated with
is empowered by failure to recognize it and
experiences not rooted in reality such as
lack of understanding on how to overcome
hearing voices without sounds
its occult presence. The resulting cocktail of
(hallucinations) and false, tenaciously held
ignorance spiked with myths is the perfect
beliefs (delusions).
recipe for stigma. The first victory is that of
Depression is not an attention seeking
recognition.
behavior or self-inflicted condition nor a sign of being weak in faith. It is unfeeling and
What then is Depression?
naive to be judgmental by pointing the
Depression is a clinical condition presenting
accusing finger of sinfulness as its ultimate
as a morbid, intense state of heaviness of
cause. We know that this condition is closely
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94 | Her Spiritual Etiquette associated with chemical imbalances and
My answer to the often-asked question as to
physical changes in the brain. It is not a
whether a spiritual or medical approach
normal state of sadness, hence the common
should be adopted to combat mental
flippant advice for sufferers to “pull
disorders has always been- both! Obtaining
yourself together or get over it brother /
spiritual support through prayers does not
sister” is more damaging than helpful.
preclude help from GPs and Mental Health
Hope for the Depressed
Specialists. A holistic approach is best.
My key take home message is that the depressed can actively promote their own
Confide About Depression.
recovery. For starters, there is sufficient,
Depression can be a very lonely experience
convincing research evidence that faith
for those going through that “valley of the
confers relative protection against
shadow of death”. Getting a non-
depression, and also promotes quicker
judgmental, sensitive and supportive
recovery when it sets in.
confidant to unburden your mind to can bring great relief. We know from research
Here are the 5 Kingdom Nuggets for
that lack of confiding relationships is a risk
Dealing with Depression.
factor for suffering depression in the first
instance. Confront Depression and Seek Help Acknowledgement of depression as a
Maintaining confidentiality is an area we all
condition to be tackled is not a sign of
can do a lot more to improve as a
weakness or lack of faith. Depression festers
community of Christians in our bid to
when denied, as then there is no legitimate
promote disclosure from those standing in
reason to seek help, whilst the condition
faith against depression.
worsens. It is not contrary to faith in God to take antidepressants or obtain
Control Your Environment in Depression
psychological therapy just as it is not anti-
Leisure activities and socializing becomes a
faith to seek marital counselling for a
chore when depressed. The victory however
fledging marriage.
lies in breaking the mold and going against
In fact, it may be reassuring to learn that
the grain of the natural. Exercise has plenty
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)- which
of evidence stacked in favor of its releasing
in UK is acclaimed as the most versatile
happy brain chemicals. We know that with
psychological therapy; heavily relies on the
persistence, going through the motions
scriptural principle of guarding one’s heart
eventually results in spontaneity. So it is
( Proverbs 4:23) and transformation by
best to be out and about rather than isolate
renewing one’s mind or thoughts ( Romans
oneself.
12:1-2), though it is not recognized as such. Music remains a powerful weapon to SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Spiritual Etiquette | 95 combat depression. Fill the atmosphere of your home and car with worship, praise and faith filled words. If David’s harp playing lifted King Saul’s mood in yester years when the ministry of the Holy Spirit was not present, how much more now? Condition Your Mind against Depression “I expect you to recover” is my favorite phrase to my depressed patients. It is a conscious attempt to paint a picture of hope. Words create and control atmospheres. Science is now catching up with what scriptures have taught all the while. The temptation is to speak unbelief, doubt, and gloom and doom when depressed. Negative words however always create negative thoughts. Negative thoughts
manifesting has inner commentaries (referred to by CBT Therapists as Negative Automatic Thoughts) are known to be pivotal in creating and maintaining the depressed mood and state. The great news is, with practice you can choose your thoughts. Cast Away Unhealthy Emotions Related to Depression Unresolved difficult emotions such as anger,
unforgiveness, and bitterness can only further weigh the spirit that is already heavy.
In Footprints of Giants Dr Ajayi examines greatness from a rounded three dimensional view point, citing scriptural, secular and scientific sources. He leans heavily on his psychiatric background in proposing practical methods of developing progreatness habits. The habits (footprints) of greatness are identified as desire, decision, diligence, development and dissemination. In a very practical and motivational approach, each chapter is concluded with a summary, reflection and an action point that highlights how to translate the read text into life changing habits. If you are looking for how to identify and form habits that mark winners out from losers, Footprints of Giants is a must read. In his personal and unique style of motivationalinspirational writing, Dr Ajayi gives insight on how to ensure you not only live a great life, but also leave a great legacy by helping others around you do the same. He challenges readers to think beyond their generation and consciously leave a footprint on subsequent generations by raising great men after their own kind. He concludes the book by introducing readers to the greatest giant who ever lived- The Giant of all Giants.
Sometimes the strength to let go comes when one counts the cost of holding on to these toxic emotions.
Dr T. Ayodele is a General Adult Psychiatrist and a member of The Royal college of Psychiatrists. He is on the Pastoral Team of his church with a brief for the Youth. He is the author of Footprints of Giants, and hosts a weekly radio show on total health and well- being. Ayodele is passionate about helping people find and express their full destiny in Christ, hence his mentoring endeavor for aspiring medics via his Mentor into Medicine youth scheme and workshops.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
96 | Empowering the Younger Woman
BE
D
ear young ladies,
YOU!
By Lauren Lamont
What does identity mean? It means "the fact of being who or what a person or thing is"
I am here to write to you to
according to the Google dictionary. In hindsight,
encourage, empower, uplift,
knowing who you are is the bottom line and
strengthen, inform, enlighten
foundation of having an identity; most
and show you to have your own identity. It's a
importantly, knowing who you are in the Lord.
simple word that carries a lot of problems, especially in this modern world where people
I will share a quick testimony with you, I used
want to duplicate others. This may sound very
to struggle with knowing who I was. It got to
simple and cliche, but it is a big problem that
the point were I was severely depressed because
many young women face on a daily basis,
I couldn't see the wood past the trees; my life
including myself. Why is having and knowing
was spiralling down, I felt worthless, useless,
who you are such a struggle amongst us? Why
helpless and hopeless because nothing was
is that we at times compare ourselves to other
happening in my life! I saw no future, my
women who we see or cross paths with, why is
relationship with God was stale, I was
it that we tend to compete with each other, to
unemployed and I wasn't studying. On top of
boost our egos and not focus on what God has
that, all of my peers and others around me were
given to us personally, uniquely and
doing so very well for themselves which
intrinsically which is our identity.
discouraged me and caused jealousy and envy
to rise up inside me. This then caused suicidal thoughts to creep in and the enemy was
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controlling my mind, telling me to end my life
made" according to Psalm 139:19 and you are
because I'm no good and I'm useless. But God
undoubtedly "blessed and highly favoured" also
saw my plight and His divine intervention
according to Luke 1:28. These scriptures
counteracted my carrying out of suicide. He told
provided are there for your encouragement on a
me that He has so much plans for my life so why
daily basis and especially when you no longer
would I want to throw it all away because of
feel like yourself, or you have doubts based on
temporary wilderness? Since then, my trust in
who you are, you're unsure of your calling or
the Lord has grown and I have discovered my
you simply trying to find your way in life. Just
identity in Him.
know that God has His hand on you and He will always ensure that there is a way to your success.
So from sharing a piece of testimony, I want to encourage you beautiful young women that God
Be blessed young women.
has a plan for your life according to Jeremiah 29:11, which reads "For I know the thoughts that
Lauren.
I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of
peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." You are also "fearfully and wonderfully
My name is Lauren Lamont, I am a single woman; I am 26 years old, a graduate, a writer, a pastor's daughter, a radio host, a speaker and a Child of the king. It has taken me a long while to discover, understand and know what my ministry is. I have been in the wilderness for so long, totally unsure of what God wants me to do specifically, all that I knew was He wanted me to lead the young people, particularly the young women, but the methodical approach to my ministry I had no idea. I was clueless of the platform I would be on to minister to young people and suddenly God graced me with writing articles to empower young women. This is the beginning of a great thing!
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Wholeness | 99
+
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
MY TESTIMONY
Finding God
By Helen Jennifer Lansley
K NGDOM MINDSET By Minister Victor Nwaorgu
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
Her Spiritual Etiquette | 101
“Seek first the kingdom of God and its righteousness and all other things shall be added unto you”-Matt 6:33.
T
he word character has been
any man drawback, my soul shall have no
defined as the summation of the
pleasure in him”.
principles we have on the inside by which we live our lives. The
mental and moral attributes whether good or bad that defines us as individuals. When a person possesses this quality, he
The bible specifically talks about three things we must do to develop a mind that agrees with God.(Colossians 3:2)”set your affection on things above, not on things on earth”. we have to set our minds continuously on things
refuses to be moved away from these godly
of eternal value.(Romans 12:2) ”And be not
principles no matter what anyone says or does.
conformed to this world but be ye transformed
This kind of strong godly character is needed
by the renewing of your mind that ye might
for a good relationship with the Lord and it is
prove that which is good and acceptable and
precious in the sight of God. We must
perfect will of God”
acknowledge that God is the owner of the kingdom and lavished his love for it; therefore we should truly love God our Father and have the interest of the Kingdom at heart. There
should be this longing in our hearts to pursue and wait on the Lord. It is only those who hunger and thirst for the Kingdom that shall be filled. In order to develop a Kingdom mindset,
The bible gave a concise account of Daniel(Dan 1:8) “But Daniel proposed in his heart not to defile himself with the king’s food nor with the wine which he drank so he asked the chief
Eunuch to help him not to defile himself” He made up his mind from the start even before the offer was made. We are living in a world where evil and immorality hold sway, moral standard have been lowered, corrupt practices
it is essential that we study the Word of God
are been esteemed. It takes one with a
and allow the word to influence our lives.
Kingdom mindset to stand their ground and
Believe in what God says and share the same
refuse to be swayed. Our actions and words
faith and confidence in God’s Word (Heb
should always be in line with God’s principle
10:38)“Now the just shall live by faith, but if
which is the truth. Our integrity and standard should not be lowered no matter what.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
The character of Joseph fascinates me, he was
yield ourselves to the leading of the spirit that
Kingdom minded, he remained
these characters can be instilled in us. There are
uncompromising and never yielded to the
many people God used to expand his
ominous entreaty to sin. Even when Portipher’s
Kingdom, some suddenly slowed down, lost
wife confronted him, he said: how can I do this
the fire, there was no more zeal for the
great wickedness against God and my master.
Kingdom. It is the will of God that men be
The bible recorded that he fled. One with a
saved and none to perish without God, if you
Kingdom mindset, always seeks to be in right
have no desire to share the gospel then you do
standing with God and man.
not have the same love God has for mankind.
Faith, obedience, wisdom, love, compassion,
Be Kingdom minded today and you will never
burden for souls, prayer, honesty, humility,
miss your place in destiny.
+
fear of God and integrity are all characters of a Kingdom minded person. It is only when we
Victor Nwaorgu is a motivational speaker and prolific writer, with a mark of distinction. He makes himself relevant everywhere he goes. He is mandated with a mission to positively impact in the lives of many in this generation. He has a global vision geared towards making positive impact in the lives of youths all over the world. Victor has held various leadership positions within and outside the church. He holds a degree in Business Management from the Prestigious University of Hertfordshire United Kingdom and a first degree in Political science from Madonna University Nigeria. He is currently the Director of Media and Publicity at Golden Pine Konsult Limited and married to Promise Nwaorgu.
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Her Style | 103
The Pioneer's Mentoring Franchise
Programme (PMFP) The Pioneer Mentoring for Purpose Franchise Programme will seek to apply the following activities to assist you to launch a Kingdom focused training programme using the TEACH – TRAIN – EMPOWER principle. For more information visit
http://www.thementoringacademy.com/ SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
104 | The Kingdom Minded Man
CONFESSIONS of a
STRONG Black Man By Hasani Pettiford
W
hen presented with the task of
cultural group of women wears ‘strength’ as a
writing this article, I must
badge of honor except Black women. I’m
admit, I spent several hours
annoyed that the expression of a woman’s
contemplating how I would
strength is often clothed in bitterness and
share my thoughts without being misinterpreted
frustration. I’m annoyed that our culture
or viewed negatively. I agonized about how to
glorifies this handcrafted concept of a ‘Strong
perfectly craft a message that would
Black Woman’ as something that should be
overwhelmingly be received by all. Then, upon
celebrated rather than redefined.
deeper reflection, I was reminded of the wisdom
of Bill Cosby…”the key to failure is trying to
I’m annoyed because it lets millions of Black
please everybody.”
men off the hook. Why step up, as men, and be strong if our women have already sworn a die-
Anytime you stand for something there will
hard allegiance to it? I’m annoyed because it
always be detractors. So, I can’t be worried about
keeps women trapped in a prison that they
who I may offend. Rather, my prayer is that my
desperately want to get out of, though many
words will ignite a flame in both men and
have refused to admit it.
women. So, here goes. My confession… What sickens me the most is that the ‘Strong Every time I hear the term ‘Strong Black Woman’
Black Women’ phenomenon is a result of a
I cringe. In fact, every time I hear a sistah brag
weakened state of Black men. Our failure as men
about being a ‘Strong Black Woman’ I get
has created a culture of women who have taken
extremely annoyed. I’m annoyed that no other
on the roles we have neglected. In countless
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106 | The Kingdom Minded Man homes across the nation, women have become
durable, while ‘strength’ is defined as the
the primary protector, provider and nurturer.
ability to maintain a moral or intellectual
As a result, a gender power shift has taken
position firmly as the embodiment of protective
place, placing women in the seat of authority.
or supportive power.
Many of our men have abandoned their posts
While a man’s physical strength may not seem
as husband/father in the home forcing women
very necessary in today’s world, our mental
to do it all by themselves. They have been
strength is vital. It is at the core of our
forced to be strong and independent; forced to
masculinity. It is the universal code of
be mother and father; forced to be husband and
manhood. It forms the nucleus of our
wife.
manliness, as it truly makes all the other manly virtues possible. Our strength is the literal
The tragedy is that with all of this strength,
power that has allowed generations of men to
they are never given the opportunity to
protect and provide for their families.
complain, cry, be vulnerable, seek sympathy or appear stressed. They are denied the luxuries
When we as men become strong, our women
of emotional breakdowns and failure. Black
no longer have to be. This is a lesson I learned
women who operate under the banner of
attending a marriage retreat several years ago.
‘Strength’ often find it very difficult to get the
During a session, all the couples were charged
empathy or compassion they seek. Their
with the task of stating something admirable
strength has overshadowed their gentleness,
about their spouse. The activity was designed
femininity, fragility and need to be cared for. In
to be used as an ice-breaker before the main
essence, they’ve exercised their super powers at
teaching session; however, what started out as
the expense of their own happiness.
light-hearted conversation soon became profound.
The amazing thing is that all of this goes away
when a male recognizes his true strength and
In a very honest moment, a newlywed couple
lives out his manhood in the highest degree.
shared their descriptions with the group. While
Dr. King said that ‘a nation or civilization that
the husband’s remarks were sweet, the wife’s
continues to produce soft-minded men
statement was hard-hitting. She said, “What I
purchases its own spiritual death on the
love about my husband is that he has proven
installment plan.
himself to be a real man and I no longer have to be STRONG.”
Our failure as men is that we have placed more importance on our physical strength than on
Here was a woman who spent most of her
our mental strength. The word ‘strong’ is
adult life raising kids, holding down a job,
defined as secure, self-confident, resilient, and
paying bills, and handling all of life’s
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
The Kingdom Minded Man | 107 responsibilities alone. She played the role of
woman. When God designed man in his image
mommy and daddy, protector and provider,
and likeness, clear instructions were given
caregiver, and was forced to wear a host of
which are found in the Word of God.
hats that didn’t naturally fit. But, once she said ‘I Do’ she was willing to relinquish the reigns
I Kings 2:2-13 paraphrased says, “Be strong…
and hand them over to someone else.
and show yourself a man…Keep the charge of the Lord your God.” Likewise, in I
In essence, she was saying I’m tired of playing
Corinthians 16:13 it says, “Be on the alert,
the role of “The Strong Black Women.” I want
stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.
to be taken care of for once. I want to be
Let all that you do be done in love.” The bible
pampered and supported. I want the tears
clearly charges men to BE STRONG. That
wiped from my eyes in my moment of
instruction was never given to women. But, the
weakness. I want to be free to be imperfect. I
reason why women are so strong today is
want to be looked at as feminine and not hard.
because many of our men have failed to be.
I want to embrace my strengths but also acknowledge my vulnerabilities. I want to be
So, my confession is that I hate the term
free to be me and not imprisoned behind bars
‘Strong Black Woman’. It’s such a historically
that define my existence in a one-dimensional
loaded term that partially speaks to our failure
way.”
as men. However, when men take their rightful place our families change, our
Her statement literally knocked me out of my
communities change and the nations of the
seat. She found and married a Real Man which
world change.
allowed her to fulfill her natural role as a
Hasani Pettiford Living out the principles they teach within their own marriage, Hasani and Danielle created Couples Academy, a relationship-based learning institute committed to placing couples on the path of fulfilment. Hasani has spoken for more than 1,000 audiences throughout the U.S., Latin America and Africa. He provides keynotes, seminars, marriage conferences, couples retreats, coaching programs, as well as individual and couple's counselling sessions. Hasani and his wife Danielle Pettiford have been happily married for 12 years and have four beautiful girls.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
108 | The Kingdom Minded Man
THE Kingdom Minded Man By Tokunbo A. Osunbayo
K
PART II
INGDOM MINDED MAN is a
KINGDOM MINDED MAN is a man who
man who puts God first
relies on God to live.
knowing that living life on your own terms or according to the
world’s rules is a dangerous road to take and makes life quite unpredictable.’ ‘But I’ve seen many good men with good qualities and they are not Christians.’ Yes, there are many men out there who are great and doing well for themselves. But there are too many men who crumble at the first sign of stress. No one knows, if this will ever
When we rely on God, He shows us how to live, gets us through the tough times, guides us when we have choices and decisions to make. Leads us on the way we need to go and generally gives us a cause to live for.’
‘Wow, God can do all that’. I’ve never believed in God. But he seems like a pretty cool guy.’ ‘He is and He’s consistently looking to help us live life in a much better way than what we try to do, when we live on our own terms.
happen to them or when it will, if it should happen.
‘How can He help me become a KINGDOM MINDED MAN, so I don’t end up like my
But a KINGDOM MINDED MAN never relies
dad?’
on himself. He lives as a man but operates in
the Spirit of God. ‘Operates in the spirit of God,’ Tom questioned, he had no idea what the pastor meant. ‘Young man, Christianity is about beliefs, morals and values. As a Christian we first believe in Christ and we also believe we are to live by ethics, morals and values.
‘First, you need to allow Him into your life.’ ‘Yes, I could do that.’ Tom was desperate for a change in his life. The pastor led Tom to Christ. Over the months he became a mentor to Tom teaching him about God and how to become a KINGDOM MINDED MAN. In summary this is what he taught him…
A KINGDOM MINDED MAN depends on A KINGDOM MINDED MAN is not perfect; he knows he doesn’t have all the answers. He does not claim to be superman. No, a SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
God. He knows God’s got his back.
SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
110 | The Kingdom Minded Man He believes that no challenge is too big for God
people he interacts with knowing it could affect
to help him through.
his life, thoughts and actions.
He asks God for guidance.
The KINGDOM MINDED MAN submits to God, knowing that without Him life can be
He asks God for wisdom.
tough. He works on himself to be a good man. He seeks God always. He treats a woman with respect. He takes up his role as a KINGDOM MINDED
He knows a woman is not a lesser being.
MAN with vigour.
He knows he will be or is the head of the home.
He carries out his manly duties with a sense of understanding.
He’s ready to learn to be a role model and leader in his home.
He is a man who consistently develops his
If he is married he loves his wife through God’s eyes.
character. He treats everyone with the respect they
He protects his family
deserve.
He provides for his family
He knows no one is more superior to another.
He strives to be a good father.
A KINGDOM MINDED MAN lives to please
He shows his children the real world and how
His God alone knowing when he pleases God; his life will be more meaningful and he will be
to live in it,
given the tools to be ALL OF A MAN. He stays the cause when things get tough. He’s watchful of the places he goes and the
Tokunbo Osunbayo is a woman with a passion to see people live their best financial lives. For over 18 years she has been teaching and promoting financial education and financial intelligence. She is a Financial Skills Trainer, Financial Teacher, Speaker, Author, Writer and Serialpreneur and Christian. Tokunbo also runs webinars on Money, Marriage & Men. Her webinars have been a huge success touching lives all over the world. Tokunbo is a woman with a passion for God. She has a guerrilla approach to serving Him with a faith she’s learnt to depend upon for years. A friend had tagged her ‘Woman of Faith’. She had truly believed and still believes God of some of the most outlandish things. Tokunbo has been married for 22 years and has three children. You can follow her on Facebook: Tokunbo Osunbayo or on her websites www.tokunboosunbayo.com SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN .
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Have you been searching for the meaning of life? Have you ever asked yourself, why was I born? What am I meant to do? Who am I called to?
What is my purpose? The best gift for any person who has been searching and hasn’t found an answer is Jesus Christ. Perhaps you’ve desired to have a relationship with Him, but there has been no one to show you how. We would love to show you how. Please say this prayer "Father, I know that I have broken your laws and my sins have separated me from you. I am truly sorry, and now I want to turn away from my past sinful life toward you. Please forgive me, and help me avoid sinning again. I believe that your son, Jesus Christ died for my sins, was resurrected from the dead, is alive, and hears my prayer. I invite Jesus to become the Lord of my life, to rule and reign in my heart from this day forward. Please send your Holy Spirit to help me obey You, and to do Your will for the rest of my life. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen." If you have said this prayer and would love to know more please email us at info@wewmagazine.com we would love to help you develop your relationship with God. SUMMER 2015 WOMEN EMPOWERING WOMEN
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