Just Between Us | Summer 2024 by Just Between Us

Hearing God’s Voice by Cara McLauchlan

SAYING GOODBYE TO THE HOME YOU LOVE

HOW TO SUPPORT SOMEONE FOR THE LONG HAUL

The Gift of

Rest

MAKE SPACE FOR A JOY-FILLED SUMMER

by Catriona Futter

FIND JOY IN YOUR MOTHERING LIFE’S NOT MEANT TO BE LIVED DEFENSIVELY

summer 2024 | F I N D M O R E A T J U S T B E T W E E N U S . O R G

welcome from the editor SHELLY ESSER

Welcome to Summer! Hi Friends, Summer… doesn’t just hearing the word make your spirit feel lighter, freer, and happier? I know it does for me. I look forward to this break in the year when sunshine lasts a little longer, a warm blast meets you every time you step outside, and opportunities for your soul refreshment abound everywhere you look. We savor the sun-kissed shimmering water that washes over our tired souls, the extended times with family and friends on memorable vacations, the lunches at fun outdoor spots, and the favorite cool drinks that quench our thirst—all of it somehow brings us back to life! I live in a part of the country where summers are short-lived, so I have to be intentional—our word for the year—about squeezing the enjoyment out of every minute of it. Do you know what happens when we go into summer with an intentional mindset? We don’t miss out on all God has in store for us; instead, we go through the season purposefully seizing hold of the new opportunities in front of us instead of looking back with regret. We want this issue to help you do that and more…so you can enjoy an intentional summer filled with all the good things your soul needs, and you can look back and say, “My summer counted, it produced growth, and my faith is stronger because of it!”

Then, How I Learned to Hear God’s Voice by Cara McLauchlan on page 16 will help you find your own listening style to hear God. As you’ll see, it most often starts with making more room for God in your life. And for those people in your life who are enduring long trials, author Eileen VandeBerg shares firsthand from her family’s chronic health challenges in Bear Their Burdens on page 26. She offers five practical ways you can approach and come alongside those who are suffering in your life. I can’t wait for you to dig in—there is so much more in store for you! Plan to savor every word and let the Holy Spirit encourage you, comfort you, challenge you, and inspire you. May this summer be a time of spiritual rejuvenation, growth, and deepening intimacy with Jesus. As you bask in the warmth and new rhythm this season brings, may your spirit be refreshed and your faith strengthened—and may you have some fun and new adventures along the way! Here’s to an intentionally refreshing summer!

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May God use the words in this issue as part of His summer refreshment plan for you—where you can take a few moments throughout this quarter to draw strength, hope, and encouragement from the words His Spirit lifts straight from the pages and into your hearts.

Inside, you will find all kinds of inspiring articles from women like you. For starters, The Gift of Intentional Rest by Catriona Futter on page 12 will introduce you to seven types of rest and will give you the framework to be intentional in planning activities to restore your soul instead of depleting it. You’ll find a link to a quiz that will help you assess your rest needs.

Contents

V O L U M E

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S U M M E R

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on the cover

Recover your life, renew your energy, and restore your soul. by Catriona Futter

Lessons from the birdsong. by Cara McLauchlan

Sticking with others through their long trials. by Eileen VandeBerg

God gives you grace enough to let go. by Ann M. Cook

The beautiful journey of trusting it all to God. by Katie Davis Majors

Intentionally planning a summer that counts. by Laura Thomas

The Gift of Intentional Rest

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Saying Goodbye to Your Family Home

How I Learned to Hear God’s Voice

What I Didn’t Know About Being a Mom

Bear Their Burdens

Making Space for Simple Joy

About Our Ministry: Just Between Us is a vibrant and expanding not-for-profit ministry that continues to transform the lives of women around the world. Our heart-focused and biblically-based content in the print magazine, on the website, in the weekly digital mini magazine, on social media, and other products—all help women find hope and encouragement while growing their faith and deepening their love for Jesus.

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row Your 36 GDiscipleship 38 Intentional Faith

A Change of Perspective

Everyone is dealing with something, let’s choose compassion over judgment. by Renee Smith

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45 Everyday Transformation 46 Between Friends

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10 Transparent Moments 11 Encouraging WORDS 15 Jill Briscoe Poetry 21 Living Your Faith 24 Prayer Prompts

Renewals Manager & Software Support Rebecca Loesche

Director Digital Media Mary Ann Prasser

43 44 Living Well

How God builds truth into us in an intentional and sequential manner. by Sandy Mayle

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Outside Your Front Door

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You can be secure in the cleft of God’s heart. by Constance B. Fink

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Whispers from the Waves

CREDITS

CALENDAR

encouragement PROMPTS

Every issue of Just Between Us is packed full of inspiration, encouragement, and Scripture, so we want to help you keep it going long after you’ve read the last article. Use this calendar filled with application prompts pulled from the current issue over the next two months to keep your soul filled up and to deepen your experience until your fall issue arrives!

june

ssess your friendships. How many are 1 Alife-giving, toxic, or draining? Take time for so-

Spend some time journaling about how you can be more intentional in your spiritual growth on page 41.

Look up Matthew 6:6. Identify your prayer closet and spend some time there for the sole purpose of hearing God’s voice. What is He saying to you (pg. 16)?

Trust God to give you enough grace to make new memories in an area of your life where you need to let go of the “old” on page 28 (leaving your home, etc.).

etermine which area of rest you most struggle D with on page 12. Link to the quiz on page 14 to help you assess your rest needs and come up with a plan to address this area.

ray about an area of your life where you need to P change your perspective (pg. 22). How can you bring more compassion to the people in your life?

Commit to grow deeper in your discipleship by ___________(pg. 36).

emember that no matter what you are going R through, Jesus never loses sight of you. Pray that you will experience His peace in your situation (pg. 8).

ead Mark 5. Swap out your battle for the man’s R battle. Ask God to use this story to increase your faith in God’s power (pg. 38).

ournal about what is disrupting your peace. J Remember that Jesus sees you. Call out to Him in faith, not fear (pg. 8).

Read through the five ways you can support a friend through a long trial (pg. 27). Plan to do one this month. Thank God today for children and the high calling of motherhood. Send a note of thanks to a woman in your life who has been a mom to you (pg. 32). Plan a regular date night with your husband. Look at the benefits of dating your mate on page 9 and discuss those with him.

Gather your girlfriends or coworkers and do the Bible study on page 40. Discuss steps to foster deeper roots in God’s love.

Bring your anger to God and ask Him to help you identify what’s at the root. Are you struggling with: definitive or distorted anger (pg. 45). Ask God to give you grace as you work through it.

Pray for your colleagues at work: company president, board of directors, boss, coworkers, and anyone struggling or needing to hear about Christ (pg. 42).

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july

Look up the verses in “Whispers from the Waves” on pages 18-20. Write one on an index card and let it refresh your soul.

Work through the steps of listening to hear God’s voice better on pages 16-17. Take a step and find your own hangout with God! Think about your grief in a transition you’re currently in. Write down the hope offered on page 44.

Think about this quote: “Let’s redefine hospitality not just as outward acts of serving, but as a willingness to receive—to accept a helping hand, a listening ear, or a warm meal offered in love.” What might you be missing by not receiving the hospitality from others (pg. 7)?

es su is n ee w et b in e in z a g a m ... for using the

cial rest this week (pg. 14).

TABLE TALK WITH ABBY

The Other Side of Hospitality

here’s a tendency in the early years of marriage and motherhood to feel pressure to “do it all.” I am there. Navigating my first year of marriage and pregnancy has not been easy, and the influencers of our culture are reminding me, quite perfectly, how imperfect I am when it comes to having everything put together. Most days, I was in bed exhausted by just carrying my first child, let alone thinking ahead to tending to toddlers or teenagers. I’m reminded that the enemy is trying to keep me from inviting people into my chaos.

True Hospitality Might Look Different In the midst of this, I had a thought: we pour ourselves into nurturing our families, building careers, maintaining friendships, and striving to be the perfect “hostess” in our homes, but what if true hospitality involves something deeper, something beyond perfectly set tables and meticulously planned gatherings? What if it’s about opening our hearts to the natural ebb and flow of our seasons, recognizing that there are times for both serving and being served?

Learning to Receive

The Bible offers beautiful stories divinely written to guide us. Remember Ruth, the gleaning widow? During her season of hardship, she humbly accepted Boaz’s generosity, finding sustenance and dignity in his offer. This reminds us that accepting help and allowing others to serve us isn’t a sign of weakness but a form of grace. It allows others to express their love and compassion, fostering connections that nourish both the giver and the receiver.

can offer ourselves is seeking out the comfort and wisdom of others. Finally, think of Jesus, the ultimate servant leader. Throughout His ministry, He washed the feet of His disciples, a profound act of humility and service. Yet, He also allowed Himself to be served by those who loved Him: Mary anointing His feet, Martha preparing a meal, and the disciples tending to His needs. He understood that receiving isn’t a diminishing act, but one that opens space for deeper connection and vulnerability.

Creating Community

As we navigate the diverse seasons of our lives, let’s challenge the societal pressure to constantly pour out without ever allowing ourselves to be refilled. Let’s redefine hospitality not just as outward acts of serving, but as a willingness to receive—to accept a helping hand, a listening ear, or a warm meal offered with love. This shift requires courage, vulnerability, and the recognition that we are all interconnected, woven into the fabric of a community where giving and receiving flows freely. In this new season of motherhood, I’m learning that vulnerability isn’t weakness but strength. Accepting help from my husband, family, and friends isn’t a failure but a doorway to deeper connection and gratitude. It allows me to be fully present for my son, to savor the fleeting moments of cuddles and cooing laughter. It nourishes me so I can, in turn, nourish him and those around me.

You Are Not Alone

You are not alone. We are all on this journey together. Embrace your season. Allow yourself to be served, to rest, to receive. And when the opportunity arises, extend that same grace and hospitality to others, creating love and support that ripples through our lives and communities.

Abby Turner Kuykendall is the author of The Living Table, is a newlywed, a new mom, and works full-time as a food blogger, speaker, and writer. Abby’s passion is to encourage women to stop wasting time waiting for the perfect family, house, or table and to start opening their homes and building community. Learn more about Abby and enjoy her recipes at atabletopaffair.com. G facebook.com/atabletopaffair w pinterest.com/atabletopaffair e instagram.com/atabletopaffair

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Then there’s Mary, the young woman chosen to bear the Son of God. In her Magnificat, she sings of her soul “magnifying the Lord” and her spirit “rejoicing in God her Savior.” Even amid the awe and responsibility of her calling, Mary recognized the need for support. She sought refuge with her cousin Elizabeth, a woman seasoned in faith and motherhood, a reminder that sometimes, the greatest hospitality we

Abby Turner Kuykendall

BETWEEN US

Jesus Never Loses Sight of Us

Lysa TerKeurst

Later that night, the boat was in the middle of the lake, and he was alone on land. He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them (Mark 6:47–48).

ave you ever walked through something so difficult, so terrifying, that you’ve caught yourself asking, “Jesus, where are You?”

When life gets messy, at times it can feel like our Messiah has gone missing. That’s exactly the kind of situation we find the disciples in as we read Mark 6. Right after the feeding of the five thousand, they got in a boat, and strong winds caused the water to get very rough. The disciples were straining at the oars as the realities of life beat against them. A deeper study of the Greek word basanizó (bas-an-ID-zo), translated as “straining” here in Mark 6:48, reveals just how distressing their circumstances were. The literal translation means “to torment.” It’s a word we see used in the context of the torment caused by demon possession (Mark 5:7). Mark clearly wanted to emphasize the serious turmoil and struggle these men were facing.

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This storm terrified them. The waves weren’t just ebbing, cresting, and crashing like you’ve probably seen if you’ve ever been in rough waters. These waves were bubbling up and exploding all around them in unpredictable ways. They couldn’t brace themselves or their boat. They were completely helpless and swallowed up by fear.

I certainly can’t blame them for being afraid at that moment. Sometimes it’s hard not to be completely consumed by fear, isn’t it? Especially when life feels hopeless. Oh, how thankful I am that even when our storms cause us to lose sight of hope, Jesus never loses sight of us.

While the disciples were straining in the boat, Jesus was praying on the mountainside. From where He stood, Jesus saw the disciples in the middle of the lake: Later that night, the boat was in the middle of the lake, and he was alone on land. He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them (Mark 6:47–48). I want us to notice Jesus’ response to the disciples who missed Him and who cried out in fear, not faith. The Scripture says that immediately (I love that it was immediate) He spoke to them and said, Don’t be afraid (Mark 6:50). He didn’t criticize them for being afraid. He climbed into the boat with them. He’s saying the same thing to you and me. He’s not running from us in our fears. He’s climbing in to be right there with us. And with His presence comes peace. He wants us to see Him, sweet friend. He wants us to know Him— a truth we discover not just in this passage but all throughout Scripture. The same God who willingly revealed Himself to people in the Bible wants to reveal the fullness of His peace and the power of His presence to us as well. In the midst of whatever hurts and heartbreaks are disrupting our peace, I pray we will see Him coming. We no longer have to cry out in fear; we can call out in faith. Calm and trusting. Because we know. We know He sees us. We know He’s for us. We know He’s in control. Excerpted from Clear Mind, Peaceful Heart: 50 Devotions for Sleeping Well in a World Full of Worry by Lysa TerKeurst and Proverbs 31, Copyright © March 2024. Used by permission of Thomas Nelson. www.LysaTerKeurst.com

Lysa TerKeurst is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the #1 New York Times’ bestselling author of Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way, and Uninvited. She writes from her gray farm table and lives with her family in North Carolina. LysaTerKeurst.com Ö LysaTerKeurst G Lysa TerKeurst

HAPPY HOME

Too Busy for Date Night?

’ve got a confession. For many of the 25 years my husband, James, and I have been married, we haven’t been consistent about date nights. We’ve never been the couple that goes out once a week without fail. With three kids, work, sports, and church, date nights often got shoved to the back burner for weeks (or months). Plus, for much of our married life, James and I have worked from home. We’re usually together for two (if not three) meals a day. His office is right next to mine, so if we spend so much time together already, is it essential to date? Turns out the answer is an emphatic yes!

Be Committed to the Adventure

Going out for a romantic meal, walking along a trail, or watching the sunset bonds you together in a way that just sharing space cannot. God wired us all for deep social connection. Date night is a wonderful, regular way to socialize with your spouse and others. Date nights don’t have to be expensive to be enjoyable and beneficial. They just have to be planned and non-negotiable on the calendar. James thought taking a dance class would be fun. Lessons were offered every Friday night, so he put a recurring dance date on our calendar. There was always something else competing for that time slot, so the dance lessons kept getting pushed off. When we finally got serious about actually dancing, we chose a specific date and went. Now, we could enjoy the anticipation of going on date night. We learned how to waltz…some toes were stepped on, and it was certainly entertaining!

Research Supports Date Nights

Date nights are also linked to more stable marriages. Wives and husbands in the frequent date night group were about 14 percentage points more likely to report that divorce was not at all likely in the future.

Benefits Abound

Can going out for Taco Tuesday really accomplish so much good in a marriage? Date nights strengthen marriages for many reasons, such as: Improved Communication. When you remove distractions like needy children and constant interruptions, date night gives you the chance to catch up with each other and connect emotionally. Proverbs 20:5 says, “The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out.” Share what’s on your heart with your man. Dream again out loud together. What new thing might God be calling you to as a couple? Speak words of affirmation. Novelty. Our days can blend with very little variation. Some seasons are more monotonous than others. You might be bored or exhausted now. Either way, the novelty of date night is something to anticipate. Think hiking, travel, sports, card games, chess, pickleball, or a cooking class. Romance. My husband likes to tease that if we see a couple kissing in public, it means that they are not married. So, prove James wrong and kiss on your date night. Remember Solomon’s bride who says, “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—for your love is more delightful than wine” (Song of Songs 1:2). Where will you and your husband be going on your next date night? Put it on your calendar today and enjoy the many benefits of regular date nights. We didn’t even touch on the joys of not cooking or cleaning if you go out to dinner!

Arlene Pellicane is a speaker, host of the Happy Home podcast, and author of several books including: Screen Kids, Parents Rising, and 31 Days to a Happy Husband. Arlene has been featured on the Today Show, Fox & Friends, Wall Street Journal, FamilyLife Today, and Focus on the Family. She lives in San Diego, Calif., with her husband, James, and their three children. arlenepellicane.com G facebook.com/ArlenePellicaneAuthor Ö twitter.com/ArlenePellicane e ArlenePellicane

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Did you know that research backs up the immense value of date nights? Forty-eight percent of couples who go on date nights once or more frequently per month reported being significantly happier together and satisfied with their communication and physical intimacy.

Arlene Pellicane

TRANSPARENT MOMENTS

No Regrets

s much as I long to say, “All I need is Jesus,” I lean on relationships. They are my emotional anchors. Seeing their familiar faces comforts me. Knowing I have history with someone who has fought with me in the trenches gives me emotional courage to face the next battle. What happens when they are gone? The apostle Paul paused in his momentum when a relationship he had counted on was missing in action. Second Corinthians 2:12-15 tells us: Now when I went to Troas to preach the gospel of Christ and found that the Lord had opened a door for me, I still had no peace of mind, because I did not find my brother Titus there. So, I said goodbye to them and went on to Macedonia. But thanks be to God, who always leads us as captives in Christ’s triumphal procession and uses us to spread the aroma of the knowledge of him everywhere.

Remember the Call

Through Paul’s example, God taught me to always return to the time when I first heard the calling. In Paul’s case he said, The Lord had opened a door for me. It helps when we can pinpoint the moment, incident, or experience that confirmed that God is the one who sent us into the battle. While in the battle, details often change. Did we expect to fight the battle with a specific individual? Did we expect to have certain resources? What changed that made the battle impossible to fight? In Paul’s case, did he really need Titus to be present or was Titus’ absence a detail God allowed to change?

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The Kingdom Mission

There are times our lack of peace is not from the Holy Spirit but from our own lack of assurance. In Paul’s case, the only detail that changed was the person he had counted on to be present. The es-

Anita Carman sential message of the gospel, to reach those who have not heard, did not change. When the essentials are still in operation, could it be that we are talking ourselves out of a divine appointment and using human logic to redefine a kingdom mission? Paul concluded his assessment by thanking God for always leading him into victory. His words comfort us to know that even if we missed the mark, God does not give up on us.

Unforeseen Opportunities

In the mission God has given me to lead Inspire Women for over two decades, I see turns in the road I missed; times I hesitated to go forward because someone I considered as key was missing in action. I see moments of crisis when the challenges ahead of me were increasing and daunting, while our resources were shrinking. But I also see God who redirected my eyes away from resources I used to count on to explore a supply I had overlooked. I see God using circumstances to grow my faith and to develop me as a leader He can trust.

All We Need

Perhaps today you are staring at a situation of shrinking personnel or resources. Practical details can intimidate us until God redirects our eyes to look at life with His divine perspective. What truly is essential to win the battle? Could it be that God has already deposited in us what is needed for the victory? Instead of identifying reasons why the mission can’t possibly succeed, why not redirect our attention to the gifts in us? Why not celebrate the opportunity to rise to the occasion in ways that will make God’s name famous? At the crossroads of life, we choose our future. When our time on earth is over, may we live a life of no regrets!

Anita Carman arrived in America at 17, after her mother’s tragic suicide. Today, she is a walking billboard of how God transformed her pain into passion to build Inspire Women, a nonprofit that unites thousands of women of all races and invests in their potential to change the world. She has an MBA from SUNY and an MABS from Dallas Theological Seminary. Anita has authored several books and lives in Houston, Tex., with her husband. She has two grown sons. Visit her at inspirewomen.org. (Anita Carman’s signature curriculum, being taught through Inspire Women’s Leadership Academy, offers an online option to teach women how to make decisions fitting for one who is the King’s daughter. To enroll, please email info@inspirewomen.org.)

encouraging WORDS

“Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” WILLIAM JAMES

“Friendships only blossom out of intentionality.”

“When we intentionally choose God over our desires, we position ourselves to live a life without great regrets.”

Live Intentionally 2 SAMUEL 11:2

“Teach us to number our days carefully so that we may develop wisdom in our hearts.” PSALM 90:12

“Discipleship is not about doing things perfectly; it’s about doing things intentionally.”

“As you seek to live intentionally, you will inspire others.”

DIETER F. UCHTDORF

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The Gift of

rest In tentiona l

Recover your life, renew your energy, and restore your soul. by Catriona Futter

“Come to Me all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest”

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(Matt. 11:28). So said Jesus, and to many of us, these words are incredibly familiar. But sometimes I’d like a little bit more detail: “Jesus, what do You actually mean by that? ‘Cuz it’s just not working for me—I am exhausted.”

I am in a season of life where there are many demands on my mental and emotional energy. My two daughters are now both students, studying away from home. The last few years have been busy helping them get through final exams, assemble art portfolios and university applications, and leave home with all the accompanying challenges. I see and understand with gratitude all that is good about these changes. And I also see that I am exhausted and depleted! I know that sleep brings rest, but sleeping can be difficult when our minds struggle to quiet. And even when I did get a good night’s sleep, it failed to bring restoration to my heart, soul, and mind. The revelation for me is that just as there are different ways to feel tired, so too are there different forms of rest.

Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith is a medical doctor who identified seven different types of rest. After reading her book Sacred Rest and exploring her website, I felt like I had the key that unlocked the answers to many of my questions that had been lacking all my life.

The Seven Types of Rest

We can often equate “rest” with physical rest and needing more sleep. However, this narrow concept of “rest” can miss the mark. It is not a one-size-fits-all solution to our body, mind, and soul tiredness. Understanding the multifaceted idea of seven different types of rest brings freedom and hope for our weary souls and facilitates intentional rest-filled living. What are the seven different types of rest as outlined by Dr. Dalton-Smith (www.drdaltonsmith.com/resources)?

Physical Rest. This is a familiar place to start.

Physical rest is about using our bodies in ways that restore and relax, reduce tension, and facilitate better sleep. Our bodies are astonishing, and we often take them for granted, but physical rest is intentionally using our bodies in ways that reconnect our fragmented selves in positive and restorative ways.

I have been out of practice at paying attention to what my body is telling me it needs. But a wonderful Pilates instructor has helped me notice where I am carrying tension in my body, and then intentionally addresses it through breathing, postural changes, and stretching. This is a work in progress, but it is a great start.

Mental Rest. Our brains are often completely overloaded with to-do lists, mentally demanding work, overthinking patterns, self-criticism, and endless planning. This mental chatter is exhausting and diminishes our concentration.

Mental rest is about quieting that noise and switching off from mental overload. Taking regular short breaks, especially from screen work, and a quick brain dump onto paper at the end of the day can help.

Sensory Rest. Here, we deliberately deprive ourselves of sensory input. Switch off the electronics, turn off the music, shut out the background noise, and stop the conversations. Give our eyes a rest from the onslaught of visual stimulation that is our modern world.

This is the first kind of rest that I did not know I needed. I am discovering how central it is for me to have silence and to look at something beautiful. My senses felt frazzled, heightened, and on constant alert—it became an intentional discipline to sit quietly and look at the tree outside my window for a few minutes each day or go for a walk along the river and listen to the birds. They are simple things, but shutting out the noise has been key.

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Silence is also a wonderful tool for this. Try sitting in complete silence for a few minutes, focusing only on God, and see how hard it is! This is only one tool we can use to bring us mental rest, but it is a powerful one. Practice using breath prayers where you meditate on a single phrase

of Scripture connecting your breathing, body, and Scripture to bring you into a place of stillness. This has been so helpful for me.

Creative Rest. This rest comes from being in the presence of something beautiful, inspiring, and soul expanding. Think about the environments you are in most often. A bland, functional, and screenfilled workplace or a cluttered home environment will struggle to inspire us. I need beauty: a stunning piece of music, a gorgeous textile, a scented candle, an inspiring piece of artwork.

We are made in the image of an awe-inspiring Creator God and so it makes sense that this part of us also needs attention. I have struggled with this as it can feel a little indulgent when there is so much to do. But beauty and creativity, whatever that looks like, inspires a different response in me and reawakens awe. This helps shift my perspective back onto the Creator Himself, and His glorious and unlimited resources (Eph 3:16) for all that I need. Do whatever opens your eyes afresh to the wonder and awe because it can bring creative rest.

Spiritual Rest. When we connect to something bigger than ourselves, it brings us purpose, meaning, and a sense of belonging. God has been gently helping me shift focus here too.

I am unlearning years of taking a fairly structured approach to time with God, not in the least bringing Him all the needs of those I love and the world around me. However, in this season of weariness, God reminds me that simply sitting in His presence, sheltered under His wings (Ps. 91) is enough. I don’t need to say anything, to ask anything, or even read or write anything. He is simply inviting me to be still. That, for now, is the spiritual rest I need.

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Emotional Rest. Do you find yourself trying to please all the people around you all the time? Do you feel unable to express how you really feel for fear of being let down, rejected, or judged? Perhaps you are the person everyone else depends on for support.

Emotional rest is about being in a safe space where we can fully and authentically express how we feel without judgment. This is another huge shift for me. I am a natural just-get-on-with-it person, high capacity, strong and independent, and very organized. For me, emotional rest is learning that my needs are valid, and my capacity is limited. I am learning to express to my husband what I need, to say no more often, and to be honest

with myself and close friends about how I am. This vulnerability has been a real encouragement to them as well as to me!

Social Rest. We need positive, supportive, and energy-giving people around us to fully be ourselves—people we neither have to compete with nor perform in front of. We need to be able to identify and limit time with people who are draining, negative, or toxic. If we are the ones doing most of the giving in most of our relationships, then we require social rest. We cannot continue to give out unless we are being poured into.

More sleep will not restore our battered and exhausted hearts and souls if we are depleted by people around us. This does not make those relationships wrong. We have all been in dark days when we’ve been the ones depleting the energy of our friends. But when we identify that this is what is causing us to feel tired, we can then actively seek out life-giving and positive friends who will nurture and encourage us.

How About You?

Knowing about the seven types of rest gives us a wonderful framework to be very intentional about planning activities that will fuel what is missing and restore us in body, mind, heart, and soul. At the start of the week, do a quick inventory of how you feel in all seven areas. Perhaps you identify that you need creative, sensory, and social rest. See where there are pockets of time to meet those needs. Perhaps meet up with a good soul friend for a walk in a local park, or art gallery, or spend the first 10 minutes of each day sitting in silence in a calm space, meditating on a single phrase of Scripture. Take time to stop, notice, and understand what meets your rest needs in all seven areas so you have some tools available. Receive that lovely invitation from Jesus to come to Him, with your body, mind, senses, creativity, emotions, heart, and soul to receive all that He has for you.

Take the rest quiz to help you identify your rest needs, and then intentionally build in the kinds of rest you need into your week.

Catriona Futter is a Christian life coach, author, and speaker, and offers individual coaching, group coaching, and speaking through her business, Equip for Life Coaching. She lives in Glasgow, Scotland, with her husband, and two daughters away at university. Read more of her writing on her blog at equipforlifecoaching.com/blog/

It’s not the way things ought to be And yet the way things are, I look above and see a void And not one single star. Then in the day the blue is grey,

Not

AS IT OUGHT TO BE

The winds of change are stilled, My heart it seems —Must die to dreams I’ll never see fulfilled. It’s not the way things ought to be And yet the way things are, Then God walks in, Forgives the sin And lights my evening star. He tames my rebel doubts with love, Rebukes my frantic fears, Then asks me why I sigh and cry And counts my many tears. One day the things that “ought to be” Will be the way He’s planned, So I should live And freely give My hopes into His hand. I’ll live in light of ever-ness With eyes upon the Throne, He’ll give me grace To run the race

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Till I am safely home.

HOW I LEARNED TO

HEAR GOD’S VOICE

Lessons from the birdsong. by Cara McLauchlan

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silent longing cloaked my heart. I knew something was missing in my relationship with God. I was doing all the “right” things— praying, reading my Bible, and attending church—but still I felt dissatisfied. My faith felt stale and lacked the freshness of the vibrant relationship I once knew. I sensed a soul-stirring hunger to go deeper with God, yet was lost on how to do it. With a heart full of desire, I began to start actively listening for His voice in the only practical way I knew—birdwatching.

Birdwatching was a fun summer pastime our family treasured. We would fill the bird feeder, gather bird guides and binoculars, and then wait. Sometimes we would wait in a secluded spot outdoors, other times from a window perch. As my son aged up in years, he eventually opted out. Yet for me, it became a calming meditation to settle into my environment, notice the beauty, and relax into the rhythm of nature.

In the beginning days of birdwatching, I saw nothing; heard nothing. All I could focus on was the mental chatter in my head. My to-do list wouldn’t stop as I considered the mountain of tasks I had yet to complete. I would run through all the reasons why it was pointless to sit here as I was simply wasting my time.

Just Do It

Then, as my breathing slowed and I surrendered to the moment, I heard the sweet chirps serenading me with beauty. I heard the vibrant staccato of the Cardinal, the tweetsie sounds of the Tufted Titmouse, and the friendly “dee-dee-dee” of the Chickadees. When I finally settled down and quieted my soul, I noticed the diversity of lovely melodies. In fact, there was a full bird symphony, practically a riot of sounds happening in my own backyard. I only needed to

be still enough to hear it. Experience has taught me the only way to get better at birdwatching is to actually do more birdwatching. Similarly, if I wanted to hear more from God, I needed to position myself to actually hear Him. This meant I needed to spend time simply hanging out with Christ—just me and Jesus time—with no expectations, no demands, and no requirements. Simply sitting still with God and letting it be about whatever He wanted it to be. Inspired by this idea, I began to practice listening for God’s voice in a more intentional way.

Get Away with God

Come, my people, enter your chambers, and shut your doors behind you; hide yourselves for a little while until the fury has passed by (Is. 26:20). Before I became intentional about listening for God, I attempted to pray and listen anywhere. While this was practical, I found I was distracted or got sidetracked easily. For me to clearly hear Him, I needed to be somewhere I could literally and figuratively shut out all things—light, sound, and other humans. So, I headed to my closet and lay down. I covered up with a cozy blanket and rested. I found this renewing practice the best way to set myself up for dedicated God-listening time.

Make Room for God

When I was limiting my time with God to specific spiritual practices, I was missing out on the best part: a deep relationship with Him. He longs to speak into our hearts and lives in a profound way, and one of the most important things we can do is learn to listen for Him with an expectant heart. If we remain quiet long enough to hear His words, we will receive His vital encouragement and truth—and, perhaps, more deeply understand that He desires to speak to each one of us, no matter how unworthy we might feel. What I found surprising is God did speak to me. Me. Average, ordinary, broken and bruised, mistake-laden me. At first, I wasn’t sure if I would hear Him. But God, in His faithful way, fulfills His promise that if we actively seek Him, we will find Him. Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you (Matt. 7:7).

Take a Step

I encourage you to find your own style of listening for God. Perhaps your God hangout time doesn’t look like mine—lying down in a closet or listening for birds. Perhaps you need to design your own method, one that allows you to tap into a renewing time of connection with Him.

But when you pray, go into your room, and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you (Matt. 6:6).

When you show up and keep showing up with a faithful, expectant heart, He will show up, too, and reward you with more than you thought possible.

Hearing from God is truly about surrender. I needed to surrender my thoughts, my heart, and my day. I intentionally decided I wouldn’t make prayer requests the focus of this time, though sometimes I would spend a few minutes praying over situations or things burdening me.

When we personally approach His throne, we create an opportunity for God to stir our hearts and minds in vibrant ways. Why not try it today? If you already have a rich life of connection, invite Him to show you more.

Expect to Hear from God

Out of heaven he let you hear his voice, that he might discipline you. And on earth he let you see his great fire, and you heard his words out of the midst of the fire (Deut. 4:36).

Reprinted from joyfullifemagazine.com (July 2021). Used with permission.

Cara McLauchlan delights in encouraging families through her words and ideas. She has published numerous articles and contributed to several books to inspire God’s best in others. For the last ten years, she has mentored and tutored hundreds of families through the traditional and classical homeschooling model. Find more of Cara’s writing at her website caramclauchlanlife.com.

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Still, some days it was hard to quiet my thoughts and hear Him clearly. I know Christ understands we have those days, too. To help quiet myself, I imagined a mental picture of myself approaching the throne of God. Then I concentrated on my breath to release anything troubling or distracting me. I invited God into this precious, sacred space to speak to me in whatever way He wanted. I made every effort to be quiet enough to truly listen for Him, and I let the time be whatever God wanted it to be.

If you are beginning your journey in faith, invite Him to show you how and where to begin. Whatever your current relationship is with Christ, invite Him to reveal Himself to you in deeper ways. He speaks to us all day long and in so many ways; we need only be available to hear His voice.

Whispers

F R O M T H E WAV ES Hearing the heart of God.

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by Constance B. Fink

ummer vacation! The world of impatient commuters and tall buildings change to the quaint atmosphere of leisurely strollers and Victorian homes. As I enter this seaside town, I begin to relax. I stroll past gift shops filled with ocean memorabilia, past a bakery filled with enticing aromas. At the end of the street, a jingling bicycle bell is drowned out by the powerful, roaring waves. As I step onto the scorching sand, the cool tree-shaded sidewalk seems miles away. This is a moment of choice. Should I return to the quaint street to rest in a private nook? Or should I walk alone on the vast beach? I chose the beach. I chose the majestic surroundings. I am glad I did. I began to hear something stronger than the gusty whistle of the wind, and louder than the steady roar of the waves. Unexpectedly, I began to hear whispers from God. From His creation. From His heart. At the water’s edge, my burdens and cares fade as if whisked away by the clouds above. Surrounded by God’s creation, I stand in awe that He included me in His design. Majestic Creator. Lord. When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?… O LORD, our LORD, how majestic is your name in all the earth (Ps. 8:3-9)! A rock levee reaches out into the water. I climb on the boulders, walk to the end, and sit on a solid rock. The waves are close—in front of me, behind me, alongside me. From this secure vantage point, I watch the swirling, dark water beneath me. The rock is high to keep me dry and sturdy to keep me safe. As the powerful swells rush past, I feel only the refreshing spray. The Lord is my Rock. He reaches among the waves of my life. He is above all. When I lean on Him, I am not overwhelmed. When I rest on Him, I am safe.

Some of the rocks on the levee are smooth. Others are jagged. Many are wet. A few are dry. The rock upon which I sit supports me. It takes the brunt of repeated waves, salt, and wind. Year after year. Through blistering summers and blustery winters, it stands firm. The rock remains unmovable and unchanged. The Lord is my Strength. He takes the brunt of the waves of my life. He feels the impact of the rough waves and wind gusts. He does not move. He will not move. His faithful strength is my stability. Some waves are small. Others are large. Some greet the sandy beach with a gentle splash. Others interrupt serenity with a tumbling crash. The steady rhythm is soothing. The swell, the crash, the last ripple. Over and over. The rhythm of movement. The rhythm of sounds. From sunrise. To sunset. Since the beginning of time. Continual. Steadfast. Dependable. The Lord is constant. His dependability gives me security. In the brightest days. In the darkest nights. Unchangeable character. Unwavering promises. Unconditional love. Unending mercy. Unfailing forgiveness. Unbiased justice. Unmatched wisdom. I notice a gentle splash and my eyes turn to a crevice. The crevice in the rocks is large enough to crawl between. The sandy floor is dry. The rugged walls muffle the sounds. The sturdy rocks provide protection. It is warm. It is quiet. Looking out from this cleft, I see peaceful beauty. The Lord is my Hiding Place. He gently invites me into His embrace. He surrounds me… for my protection…for my respite. Leaning against the protective crevice, I rest. As the sun warms me and the breeze touches my face, I close my eyes. Humming the words of the hymn writer, Fanny Crosby, my spirit relaxes. He hideth my soul in the cleft of the rock that shadows a dry, thirsty land. He hideth my life in the depths of His love and covers me there with His hand. My Creator. Father.

continued ›

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I look out on the expanse of the beach. It is home to Sandpipers, Seagulls, and crabs. Its blanket of sand displays delicate shells. Its shoreline holds footprints of men, women, and children. It holds years of memories… siblings building a sandcastle, while moms nap on a bright-colored beach towel… lovers walking hand-in-hand at sunset, dreaming of a bright future… tumultuous hurricanes and brutal blizzards. Today the beach lies tranquil. It is vast. As far as I can see. Immense. Measureless.

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand (Ps. 139:17-18).

As far as the east is from the west, I remember your sins no more” (Ps. 103:12). His love— no limits. His forgiveness—no conditions. His wooden cross—my canopy.

The low tide dots the beach with shells—different shapes, sizes, colors, and textures. Some are broken, some are whole. Stooping, I pick up a shattered conch. Its brokenness gives it unique beauty. It fits perfectly in the palm of my hand, almost as if specially formed for me. Its smoothness reveals it was held firmly in a place of constant pressure and relentless abrasiveness—gritty sand, salty surf, pounding turbulence, icy winters, blazing summers. Smoothness—a slow, gradual, steady process to make brokenness strong. A lot of effort for a small shell…for a big lesson.

The sun’s colors and long shadows remind me that my day at the beach is ending. Turning one last time before crossing the street, I echo the hymn writer, Frederick Lehman’s, awe-filled words:

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The Lord holds me firm in my place of pressure. To smooth my rough edges. To strengthen my broken part. To make me unique. To specially form me. For His use. For His enjoyment. Forever held in the palm of His hand.

Two squawking Seagulls distract me. I watch them playfully tease each other and then fly away. My gaze lingers on the blue sky. Like a canopy, it stretches to cover land and sea. No obstructions. No limits. As far as I can see. And beyond.

Could we with ink the ocean fill, And were the skies of parchment made, Were every stalk on earth a quill? And every man a scribe by trade. To write the love of God above Would drain the ocean dry. Nor could the scroll contain the whole, Though stretched from sky to sky. Then, with each step toward town, the roar of the waves and the whistle of the wind fade. But God’s whispers remain. Poignant. Passionate. Personal.

Constance B. Fink is a freelance

writer. She and her husband, Dave, live in northwest Illinois. For more of her writing, visit In the Secret Place Facebook blog: IntheSecretPlace.

Living

YOUR FAITH

Old Attic Box… Encouragement Inside! by T. Windahl

y eye was growing an extra membrane! During a routine eye exam, I was diagnosed with an Epiretinal Membrane. Concern must have been written all over my face as the optometrist quickly shared that this is a common condition that rarely requires surgery. The optometrist handed me a sheet of paper with a grid on it for a monthly home test. If I ever saw wavy lines or lines missing on the grid, while focusing on it with one eye, I was to call him.

time I had recently read about online. The devotion told of the woman’s pastor who wanted to visit her but was unsure of how he could encourage her. He assumed she would be deeply depressed about her situation. Surprisingly, when he arrived at her home for a visit, he found her joy-filled instead. She even wanted to pray a prayer of thanksgiving with him! I reread the devotion over again marveling at God’s amazing timing.

Within weeks… wavy lines appeared during the home test. I was quickly referred to an ophthalmologist and told surgery would be needed if my vision got worse. I also went online to check out the recovery protocol for surgery. What I read shocked me—one-to-three weeks face down 90 percent of the day!

Through the devotion, I sensed God confirming that I would need the surgery sooner than later. I was now convinced that recovery would not be as bad as I thought, and victory would be mine—each step of the way. He would see me through whether facedown for three weeks or not. Immediately God’s indescribable peace rose up within me.

Looking for Hope

Weeks later, I had the Epiretinal Membrane surgery; thankfully, without complications nor any required facedown recovery time. Victory was mine. Just like the victory God showed me in advance through the devotional my mom first read in 1978; the one later stored in two different attics. Until 2023, that is, when God’s perfect timing arrived. Praise be to God, the One who loves us, knows our circumstances, and longs to encourage us… in His perfect timing… and perfect way.

T. Windahl is an inspirational author. As a cancer survivor, T. has learned much in the crucible of suffering and delights in helping others find hope in Jesus. Her book, Abiding Hope, brings encouragement to others going through hard times. She and her husband have a son and daughter-in-law.

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Days later, I was sorting boxes for a future move, boxes that had been in my parents’ attic for years. Tucked within one of the boxes, I found a small devotional book. I opened it. Inside on the first page there was an encouraging note my mom’s friend had written to her following her cancer diagnosis years before. As I held the devotional in my hands, I kept hearing a small, still voice say, Read one of the devotions. I randomly opened the book and read a devotional about a woman who had to cover her eyes for three weeks. An eye issue. Three weeks? These reminded me of the eye surgery and the three-week recovery

Hope Revealed

Change OF

PERSPECTIVE

Life is not meant to be lived defensively.

by Renee Smith

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xiting my driveway, I instinctively assume a defensive posture against those I will unknowingly or inadvertently irritate, just as I brace myself to be agitated by others (e.g., the distracted or dangerous driver). Tending to my daily responsibilities, I navigate traffic and the grocery store, trying to accomplish what’s on my agenda while attempting not to mess with someone else’s. This approach is a tiring way to live and, recently, it has been a subject matter the Lord has addressed. His voice and heart have been communicated to me through three delicate and simultaneous circumstances of friends I hold dear: • During an intimate women’s-only dinner, I learned my friend’s organs are losing their fight against gravity. My young friend is suffering from something called prolapse (her insides are literally falling out). She has struggled for months and must wait a few more before having complicated (and expen-

sive) surgery—a remedy the insurance company shockingly deems “elective.” • My friend and former coworker (who I haven’t talked with in a while) has overcome COVID and pneumonia, but his survival comes with kidney failure. Unbeknownst to many who know him, he now receives dialysis while his name waits on an organ donor list. • My 75-year-old friend spends the day moving her mentally disabled sister into her house because the cost of a group home is no longer sustainable. She assumes responsibility for her sister while simultaneously loving her husband of 50 years, a godly man with progressing dementia.

Be Sensitive to Others

I am entrusted to know these tender and private difficulties, but through them God speaks to me unabashedly and firmly. Simply put, life is not meant

to be lived defensively. Yes, the chaotic and impatient interactions of daily life are ultimately due to the Fall, but the unloveliness of people is not rooted in a broad stroke of ill will. The average human does not wake up each day seeking to embody and spread ugliness. Mostly, as with my dear friends, toilsome circumstances weigh on people—physically, mentally, emotionally, and/or spiritually. Caught up in our own lives, we fail to conceive that a host of people are facing a myriad of unimaginable hardships. Our oversight of those who are suffering is commonplace because what ails them is often hidden from sight. As these unwanted obstacles arrive, daily responsibilities remain (or, as a result, are sometimes increased). No wonder we often seem to stumble into one another with less than our best foot forward. Over the last few years our culture has become increasingly divided, argumentative, and touchy.

Respond with Love and Compassion

God is imploring me in this season to know that most of my reality and observable interactions consist of far more than meets the eye. Minor “run-ins” with others are the residue of much bigger mountains that are fixed in the backdrop. As Christ-followers, our aim is not to dodge the debris of human brokenness but to daily tread the road of relationships with gentleness (Phil. 4:5). The root of difficult interactions may be difficult to understand, but the Holy Spirit can help us perceive when others are hurting and respond with the universal balm of love. Knowing the reason behind any rift is less important than choosing to live as a conduit of compassion. Christians and non-Christians share the same lot in life. Each of us faces circumstances beyond our control that result in irreparable situations we don’t prefer. Having received no vote on the matter, our realities require a response, sometimes a temporary (or permanent) change in our way of life. Coming to grips with hardship is a process, undoubtedly one that is unique to everyone. And though we can’t possibly know the burdens of each person, we can certainly feel their effects. Christian or not, hurting people step on one another as they learn to cope and find their way to acceptance. So, as we bump into one another on earth, let us seek to care for one another as Christ commands. As Christians, we have what unbelievers do not: living hope (1 Pet. 1:3). With God’s help, we work through our own trials in a way that is fruitful. Making peace with our circum-

Look to the Cross

Difficult circumstances (like those of my friends) and the rough encounters in daily life are all settings where the cross of Christ may be displayed. Jesus’ death, which appeared to be the antithesis of anything “good,” was ultimately that and so much more. Through it, salvation was made possible. Thus, our thought life should not rest upon a specific hardship, or the petty things done against us. Rather, if we are to live life in the fullness of Christ, we are wise to ask the Lord for a fresh revelation of His love (Eph. 3:19). Maturity in Christ helps us understand that God’s hand is not only used to shield us from hardship but to mold us in the midst of it (Is. 54:8; 2 Cor. 12:9).

Stop Hiding from the World

Too often, Christians recall portions of God’s Word instead of looking at it in context. For example, at times I have been guilty of hiding from “the world.” Why? Because I wrongly applied the portion of Scripture where Jesus says: I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one (John 17:14-15). As a result, I have spent too many days seeking God’s protection rather than readying myself to care for others as He has prescribed (e.g., Luke 6:35; Matt. 5:43-48).

Love God, Love Others

God’s foremost directive is to love Him and others (Matt. 22:37-39). The contentiousness of this world tempts me to retreat into safe relationships and the peace of my own home. But God reminds me that my surroundings were not intended to be comfortable. Rather, those of us who know Christ and who have been imparted with His peace are called to faithfully embody difficulties and extend gentleness to others.

Renee Smith is the author of

Leaving My Megachurch Life and founder of TheTableRDU, a local community for women who value friendship and goodwill. She lives in Raleigh, NC, with her husband.

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Share Our Living Hope

stances (and God who allowed them) keeps us from being permanently impotent and powerless to yield the light of Christ in the midst of worldly darkness. Then when we brush shoulders with others, difficult interactions do not cause us to draw inward (or worse, lash outward). Instead, we address each person from our existing place of peace. The friction we feel as our lives uncomfortably intersect the lives of others is not bad, so long as we remain yielded to Christ (Col. 2:6), while entrusting each situation to Him.

PRAYER PROMPTS

NEW DAY

Dear Father,

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Thank You for this new day after a good night of rest. I’m grateful for a clean slate where yesterday’s attitudes are history and yesterday’s sins are forgiven. A fresh start every day. Before my feet hit the floor each morning, I ask for Your help to make this day better than yesterday. I need Your strength to shut down my critical, judgmental, selfish attitudes. Oh God, muffle the sharp words that so easily fly out of my all-too-willing lips. Remind me that kindness matters…a lot, even when I don’t think it’s deserved. Remind me that life is not all about me.

Focus my thoughts and words on being the woman You want me to be, made me to be—a God-honoring servant who cares about others and reflects Jesus to everyone I meet. It’s hard some days, God, but with all my heart…oh God, hear me…I long to make a difference for Your kingdom. There’s no way I can do that with my own uneven, flagrantly selfish behavior. So, in this new day, may Your love, compassion, and kindness flow through me to every person who crosses my path. Amen.

“Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.” Lamentations 3:23

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Bear

THEIR BURDENS

How to offer help through long trials.

by Eileen VandeBerg

t the tender age of eight, our oldest child was diagnosed with leukemia. Immediately, people rallied around us—holding special prayer meetings, designing and printing T-shirts, sharing posts, sending checks, and offering meals.

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We learned that treatment would be long, and especially grueling the first six to nine months, but overall, would continue for a solid twenty-eight months. Countless appointments, emergency room scares, nights of separation, exhaustion, side effects, and heartache followed that diagnosis.

The rallying only lasts so long. The treatment lasted longer. I awoke from the initial mixture of fog and adrenaline around month nine, and the magnitude of what we were going through—and the fine line we walked between life and death—started to take hold.

I was a mess. As I updated family and friends through emails and Facebook posts, I received lots of verbal support. Well-meaning people practically shouted, “Let me know what I can do to help!” I wrote honestly and publicly, detailing the difficulties of treatment and the practical struggles along the way. I was vulnerable. “People get tired, you know.” This was a statement (in person) to me from someone at our church in response to something I shared that week. She must have felt that I needed to realize that people were weary of this long journey. Unfortunately, they could only rally around us for so long. You’re tired of hearing about it? Try living it! I screamed the retort in my head—my soul crushed—but I kept my mouth shut.

I vowed at that moment to never grow weary of supporting someone through a long trial.

Supporting Others Through Long Trials

The Bible instructs Christians to care for those around us. Galatians 6:2 says, “Bear one another’s burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ” (ESV). Lending your time, love, and energy to someone who is struggling will not only be an encouragement to them, but you are fulfilling the command to “love your neighbor” in a tangible way. Unless you’ve experienced a trial that goes on for a long time, it’s hard to grasp how taxing it is. A child or spouse with special needs, a cancer diagnosis, an injury with long-term effects, or a child with medical complexities—these are a few examples of difficulties that can drag on for years. If you are trying to encourage someone going through a long trial, you might be wondering how you can help.

Here are five practical ways to offer your support.

Avoid saying, “Let me know what I can do.” Most people can’t answer this question.

When our daughter was diagnosed with leukemia, many loving, well-meaning people uttered this phrase to me. I did not have the energy to go back to any of those people to say, “Remember when you told me to let you know what you can do? Well, I’ve figured it out! I could use a meal.” Or “Our lawn needs to be mowed,” or, “I would love for someone to take my kids to the park so I can catch up at home or enjoy a shower in peace.” This statement puts the burden on those experiencing the trial to uncomfortably come up with an immediate response if they want help, otherwise the offer dissolves. Most times, that person is too weary to know what they need when asked. to help you this week. I can bring you a meal, mow your lawn, fold some laundry, or take your kids to a park or to my house for a while. What would be the most helpful?” This releases the person from needing to think so much. All they need to do is pick from a few options and accept the help. Wording your offer to help so specifically also makes the recipient feel like you really mean it, rather than offering because it seems like the right thing to do.

Acknowledge and encourage. During our

daughter’s treatment for leukemia, we encountered many new specialists, both related and unrelated to her cancer diagnosis. The ones who touched me the most were those who held onto my hand just a little bit longer when they shook it. Through kind eyes, they acknowledged that we were fighting a long, hard battle. They understood that, while our daughter’s life and health were all we focused on, there were other battles going on as well. That acknowledgement made me feel a little less alone. Someone understood without me needing to go into every nitty gritty detail just to impress how hard this was. Someone going through a long trial will appreciate the inquiry, the caring smile, or lingering handshake or hug.

Ask how things are going. Inquiring about

how things are going shows that you still care—even if the trial has been going on for months or years. Many people going through an especially long, hard season watch those around them slowly drop off. The silence is deafening. They wish someone would see that they are still struggling. If you ask how things are going, and what is shared is difficult to hear, don’t back away. Sometimes your friend just needs someone to listen, without offering solutions for the problem. Simply say you are sorry to hear that things are still difficult and ask how you can specifically pray for them. (Or implement one of the suggestions above.) The Lord has allowed several seasons of long trials in my life. One blessing that has come from these trials is the gift to see how I can lovingly and practically help someone else going through a similar hardship. I can assure you that the time you take to encourage someone in a long trial will not only be a sweet gift to the person you help, but it will bring you the joy of Christ’s love too.

Bring a meal. I have never met a woman

who didn’t appreciate a break from cooking. Ask if there is a particular day when a meal would be especially helpful. Perhaps there are days for medical appointments or other responsibilities, and a certain day would be preferred. This also gives

Eileen VandeBerg is a wife, mother, business owner, and writer who lives in west Michigan with her husband and seven children. She enjoys writing honestly through the trials of life.

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2 3

Offer specific suggestions. “I would like

an opportunity to find out what she has going on, to hear firsthand all that is on her plate for the week. When bringing meals, remember that someone who is struggling may not want to visit or feel like her house should be clean so she can accept the meal. Simply offer to drop it off at the door or leave it in an outside fridge or cooler, if that is available.

Saying Family e y b d oo Home G TO YOUR

God gives you grace enough to let go. by Ann M. Cook

e made the decision to sell our smaller family home and cottage by a lake for a larger home. Our family of five had grown to include seven delightful grandchildren. This didn’t sound too hard. We prayed a lot about it and didn’t want to wait till we were too old to make the change. Both retired now, it seemed like the perfect time. However, I’ve always been sentimental, and change hasn’t been my forte. I like familiarity! Was I really up for this?

Ecclesiastes 3:1-2b says, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens … a time to plant and a time to uproot.” I shifted my thinking from preserving the past to greeting this new season of life with wonder and curiosity. Nothing in this life is meant to be permanent, even the good things. This is a blessing when it comes to difficult circumstances, but it can be a challenge when it means saying goodbye to a wonderful place with great memories.

My dad always used to say, “The only constant in the world, Annie, is change!” Would I have the ability or more importantly, enough grace to make this change in my life?

When I bemoaned leaving my memory-filled house, a friend told me, “Your memories are in your head!” She was right. My memories are in my head, and I can take them with me. On the practical side, there are some things I can do to help preserve these memories such as taking photos of fond possessions before giving them away, making a photo album of the home I’m leaving, and intentionally going through the house and “saying goodbye” when it’s time to leave. The day before our final move, we ordered a pizza and had a picnic in our backyard, reminiscing and enjoying the view together one last time.

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There is a Time and Season for Everything

Many of us hope to live our golden years in the home where we’ve raised our family, relishing all the memories we’ve made there. After helping our parents in their final years and seeing how their living situation wasn’t the best for them, we decided to make a long-term plan that meant making a move sooner than we thought we would. After going through our parents’ homes when they passed away, we decided it was time to go through our possessions ourselves now rather than leaving it to our kids who don’t want our stuff. So, we purged and cleaned.

The song that kept going through my head as we went through all the logistics of selling two places, packing, sorting, and giving a lot away was, “Last Time for Everything” by Brad Paisley. He sings, “Last call, last chance, last song, last dance; …‘cause there’s a last time for everything.” I’ve learned it’s okay that there is a last time for everything, even saying goodbye to the home I loved.

Enjoy the Here and Now—Make New Memories

Jesus is Our Only Constant

Moving is considered one of the most stressful events in a person’s life, even if it’s a positive change. And, adjusting to new situations can be more difficult as we age. However, as a Christ-follower, we’ve experienced newness and change before, so we can ask God to give us grace for any new situation.

I have a small plaque that my husband’s grandma kept in her home with the verse, “Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday and today and forever” (Heb. 13:8).

I’ve experienced becoming a totally new creation when I put my faith in Christ and accepted His payment for my sin on the cross. When I came to faith, everything changed—my outlook, priorities, and values. In 2 Cor. 5:17, Paul says, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here.” Moving from our old home to a new one is an illustration of when I began my walk with the Lord, and how I left my old life behind. If God could give me the grace for a total life change, I can rest in His ability to help me make other big changes like moving in this season of my life.

This certainty has been an encouragement as we have embarked on our move. I’m ready now for this new season of life to begin!

Ann M. Cook, MSN, RN is a retired nurse

and nursing instructor. She and her husband, Randy, enjoy three grown children, and seven delightful grandchildren. She lives in Okauchee, Wis.

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Our new home will start to feel like ours when we start to make new memories when everyone comes to visit, and we share meals, and when we have meaningful conversations, and have fun together. Having new neighbors allows for making new relationships with possible ministry opportunities, and I have a new place for friends to gather.

Even though life is constantly fluctuating, there is one thing that remains the same—Jesus! He’s the Creator, Savior, Redeemer, and Friend that has always been the constant. We may be going through very difficult situations in our personal life, like a move from a beloved family home, or we may be worried about all that is going on in the world and our culture. We might have stressful family or personal relationships as well. However, this statement of faith should give us an amazing amount of certainty, comfort, and encouragement. We know Jesus is with us and His plan and purposes will never change. His character, presence, love, mercy, and kindness are always there, even if we don’t see it or feel it.

Summer Reads to

Refresh Your Faith

ne of JBU’s goals is to provide resources that will encourage your faith. There is perhaps

no greater time than summer to dig into a

good book or two. Summer is all about slowing down and taking a much-needed break. What better way to nourish your soul than reading one or several of

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the listed inspirational books or Bible studies we’ve

partnered with publishers to offer you. So grab your

favorite cold drink and comfy outdoor chair and enjoy every last word!

Try one of these publisher picks!

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Available on Amazon or wherever books are sold.

WHAT I DIDN’T

Know ABOUT BEING A MOM The beautiful journey of trusting it all to God. ȷustbetweenus summer 2024

by Katie Davis Majors

omeone asked me offhandedly the other day what I hadn’t known about being a mother before I became one. I think I was expected to give a one or two sentence answer, something along the lines of, “I didn’t realize how hard it would be,” or “I didn’t know I would be so busy!” While those things are both true, I was even surprised at how quickly my mind filled and raced with the many answers to these questions. What didn’t I know about being a mother? Everything.

Consuming Love

I didn’t know that my love for them would consume me. Sure, I knew that I would love my children but I had no comprehension of the wild, devastating, uncontainable love I would feel for them. I didn’t know that they would somehow be these little extensions of me, that when they hurt I would hurt more deeply than I ever had before. That when they showed delight over a success or an excitement for God’s Word, my heart would swell within me; I would be unable to contain tears of joy. I didn’t know that sometimes I would look at them and just love them so much that my heart would physically ache inside my chest.

Growing Up Too Soon

I didn’t know that I would blink and they would be grown up. I didn’t know that I would feel like their little lives were slipping through my fingers and I would want to just soak them up, pause the time, and savor the moments. I didn’t know that I had this unspoken expectation in my mind that they would grow up, yet stay little all at the same time. I didn’t know that no matter what, I would never feel that I had done well enough, loved hard enough, or taught them enough, but that wouldn’t keep me from pouring out every ounce of myself anyway.

more and more like mine. I didn’t foresee that I would sneak into their rooms late at night just to watch their chests rise and fall and study the way their little fingers curled around the edge of their blankets. And, that no matter how “big” they got, I would still have even the curves of their fingertips etched in my mind. I didn’t know the rejoicing I would feel as I watched them serve others, when I saw them devouring Scripture, praying, or longing for more of God. And I sure didn’t know the inadequacy I would feel as I realized more and more that I was shaping them, helping God make them into the people that He intended them to be.

Surrendering Them to God

And at the end of the day, I had no idea just how powerful and humbling it would be to acknowledge that it would only be God who could change them, redeem them, and save them—not me. Only He could work in their hearts and know their futures. Only He had been with them all the days of their lives and would remain with them each day and receive all the glory. And I didn’t know Jesus’ love the way I do now, before I was a mother. My hope is that you will cherish God’s welcome invitation to know Him increasingly in answering the high calling that is motherhood. No matter how He has enabled you to be a mom—in marriage, in singleness, through adoption or foster care, through childbirth, as a mother of one, as a mother of many—keep being faithful to Him as you parent your children. He’s shaping them through you, and He is shaping you through them. Reprinted from Katie Davis Majors’ blog. Used with permission.

A Reflection of Me in Them

I didn’t know that I would see the sparkle of my eyes in theirs and hear the lilt of my voice when they spoke, or that I would smell the same scent of my skin when I kissed their foreheads, or that over the years their laughs and their mannerisms would become

Katie Davis Majors is the New York Times bestselling

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author of Kisses from Katie and Daring to Hope. Her latest book, Safe All Along: Trading Our Fears and Anxieties for God’s Unshakeable Peace was published in 2023 (Multnomah). She is also the founder of Amazima Ministries. You can get her latest book on Amazon. com and find more information on Katie at KatieDavisMajors.com.

Step BY Step WE HAVE AN INTENTIONAL GOD.

by Sandy Mayle

s a youngster, I memorized the names of the books of the New Testament through a Sunday school song: “Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts, and Romans…” I still repeat snatches of it to myself when wondering, Does Ephesians come before or after Philippians? Or, Where’s Jude? Then I learned to locate individual Bible verses by adrenaline-filled Sword Drills, where the leader’s “Charge!” sent our little hands fumbling and pages flying as we raced to the reference given.

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Later, as an older child, it dawned on me that these Bible books and verses weren’t standalones; they all linked together in the bigger story of God’s history with us.

And as an adult, I realized that the books of the Bible are grouped, not in chronological order, but in sections: the Law, the Major Prophets, the Gospels, the Epistles, etc. One year, I located a chronological guide to the Bible, and read it through in the order in which we understand events to have happened. More recently, having read Robert J. Morgan’s Reclaiming the Lost Art of Biblical Meditation, I began the habit of carrying from each devotional time a specific, Spirit-highlighted phrase or verse of Scripture, which the Holy Spirit has often used to redirect my thinking and affect my actions throughout the day.

The God of First, Next, and Lastly Do you see what has happened to me? From a child learning by rote to an adult letting the Holy Spirit knead the Word into my soul, God has successively built biblical truth into me. He started small and simple and added on, year after year. “His ways are sequential,” writes Richard Blackaby in The Ways of God. “Everything God does today is based on what He has done before and what He intends to accomplish tomorrow… With God, there is always another chapter to your story.” What does this mean? “We can expect that God will relate to us in a sequential and progressive manner. He takes time to do His work the proper way. He is never in a hurry. He does not leave important steps out.” While I hadn’t really thought of God’s step-bystep way of working, at a closer look, it’s so obvious! • He created all things over a span of six days, building from “a soup of nothingness” (Gen. 1:2, MSG) to a lush earth jam-packed with life and crowned with Adam and Eve. • He began the process of redemption even then (Rev. 13:8), followed by centuries of prophecy and preparation for Jesus’ coming to earth. At just the right time, He sent His Son as a baby to grow up

It means God is intentional about healing our soulwounds—the foundational fracture that long went undiscovered, the painful laceration from later trauma, that deep, raw gash from only yesterday… Our Father doesn’t hurriedly patch us up so we can be quickly useful to Him. He works to heal us from the inside out, cutting away, deep cleaning, applying the needed balm, and creating the best conditions for new growth. “[Not in your own strength] for it is God Who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for His good pleasure and satisfaction and delight” (Phil. 2:13, AMPC). Although we may want Him to immediately heal, He’s known to take His time tending us to inner wholeness. It means God often answers our prayers by inches and over time. “Stick with it,” He encourages us (Luke 18:1). “Don’t bail on Me when you don’t see results. I’m working. Things are happening, even if they’re in slow motion and behind the scenes.” If we examine already-answered prayers, especially the major ones, we’ll see that most of those answers took time as events built one upon another to the final result.

and die, pay the penalty for our sins, and then rise from the grave to lead everyone who will believe in Jesus into everlasting life with Him. • He began the Church with 120 people in an upper room at Pentecost. Soon thousands came to faith, and then were dispersed by persecution to carry the gospel to the world beyond Jerusalem, and eventually to us. One day, we the Church—all believers from every generation—will live eternally with Him.

By Inches and Over Time God works by this same sequential method in our lives. He made each one of us by deliberate design and with eternal intention. And His carefully thought out purposes means several things for my daily life and yours:

And the Work Goes On Don’t you love God’s way of working? Doesn’t it ground and steady your soul to know that there’s a master plan and a Master working it? Take some time to reflect prayerfully on your life from three angles: Yesterday: Consider how God has worked intentionally and sequentially in your past—starting small and building up your faith in Him, your likeness to Him, and your service to Him. Today: See this day as part of a sequence—a point God has brought you to, but also a place He will build on as you head into your future. Tomorrow: Look, then, toward that future with openness and expectation, confident that “God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns” (Phil. 1:6, NLT). And He’ll do it step by step.

Sandy Mayle is a freelance writer of

articles, devotionals, poetry, and prayer and retreat resources. She and her husband, Dave, live in Erie, Pa. They have three sons and daughters-in-laws and eight grandchildren.

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It means God has prepared a path for each of us through this life, that we may do “good works, which God prepared [for us] beforehand [taking paths which He set], so that we would walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us]” (Eph. 2:10, AMPC). The places He has put us in are no accident. Nothing in our lives is random. And God is working all things together for our good (Rom. 8:28), others’ blessing, and His glory.

It means God’s Word to us today can be the word we need. As we sit with Bible and hearts open to the Holy Spirit, He loves to highlight a phrase or verse. That particular word to us will often become our light on that day’s path, our food for that day’s nourishment, our sword for that day’s battle.

GROW YOUR DISCIPLESHIP

Pray

How to

Prayer is essential in the life of a follower of Jesus and it is often said that prayer is simply talking with God. It’s is a two-way conversation with God, Who desires for us to come and talk with Him about all of our lives, including our worries, needs, joys, and sorrows. He also wants us to listen to His quiet voice. The foundational ways that we come to know God are through prayer and the reading of His Word. He is glad when we make time for Him, because we have a God who is approachable. Let’s look at some practical instruction from God’s Word regarding prayer.

Prayer Promises

• “Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need” (Heb. 4:16). • “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you” (Jas 4:8, NASB). • “And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son” (John 14:13). • “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Phil. 4:6-8).

Practical Tips Try some of these strategies to transform your prayer time. Use these as a discipleship tool with the women you may be mentoring as well. Choose a Definite Time and Place Set a time in the morning or evening that works for you. Find a secluded, cozy place in your home or other location with a warm or frosty beverage. Quiet your heart and mind before you begin to pray.

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Start with Adoration—praising God for who He is. Then Confession—confess any sin that comes to mind and claim God’s forgiveness. Offer prayers of Thanksgiving for who God is and what He has done in your life.

Set a realistic amount of time to pray. Consistency is the key—not the length of time.

End with Supplication, specific prayers for yourself and others.

Use Scripture Read a favorite Psalm or passage of Scripture and let the words guide your prayers.

Use a Prayer Journal or Notebook Use a journal or notebook to write down what’s on your heart and/or specific items of thanks along with prayer requests. Date the entry so you can look back and see how God has answered you! Try a notecard with a ring as a fun alternative.

Practice praying out loud to help you stay focused; God is more concerned with your heart than the words you use.

Use the ACTS Pattern (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication) This technique can help guide your prayer time and keep your focus on the Lord.

Pour your heart, feelings, and thoughts out to the Lord. Consider using a devotional book or hymnal.

Use a different prayer focus for each weekday. For example: Monday, family; Tuesday, missions; Wednesday, work/church concerns; Thursday, friends; Friday, issues in the world.

Samuel Chadwick wisely said, “Satan dreads nothing but prayer. He laughs at our toiling, mocks our wisdom, but trembles when he sees the weakest saint on his knees.” When we humbly come into God’s presence, meet Him face-to-face, and sincerely seek Him—we’ll see God’s power unleashed.

Making Space for Simple Joy “What are your plans for summer?” It’s the big question being asked and answered as the sun stakes its claim high in the blue yonder and kids stuff school backpacks in deep recesses of closets. Most of us have the best intentions of creating summer memories with loved ones, taking a much-needed break from the busy, or going away for an actual vacation. But in reality, we know it will fly by at breakneck speed, and come September, we’ll look back with whiplash and wonder what happened and why we missed out.

by Laura Thomas

with what truly matters this summer. Relationships, rest, reading His Word, relishing the simple joys in the everyday: sibling laughter and fresh strawberries; spontaneous movie nights and damp beach towels on deck railings; even muddy footprints reminding us messy is okay and bulldogs live here. James 4:14 reminds us, “Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” Life is a whirlwind, a “mist,” and we only get a limited number of summers, friend. Let’s make this one count. So let’s stop long enough to smell the sweet roses and give thanks. We’ll get to experience everyday graces and life will be richer and fuller. That sounds like a summer plan to me!

Laura Thomas is a published Christian author who writes heartwarming encouragement for your soul.

She has three Christian romantic suspense novels published, a Christian teen fiction trilogy, a marriage book, and a middle-grade novel. She also writes devotionals for Union Gospel Press, articles and stories in magazines and online, and shares musings on her blog. Laura and her husband live in Kelowna, B.C. Find her at laurathomasauthor.com.

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I love this quote from Lysa TerKeurst: “We have to slow the rhythm of rush in our lives so that the best of who we are can emerge.” Perhaps we need to take a moment before things heat up, to be intentional

Intentionally planning a summer that counts.

INTENTIONAL FAITH

When You Doubt God’s Power by Jen Allee

ometimes I have to be reminded of God’s power. Intellectually, I can rattle off the mighty attributes of God, but sometimes my knowledge stares a little too long at my circumstances and begins to wonder who is stronger. Recently, I needed this reminder and found it in the most unlikely of sources: a demon. It turns out demons don’t struggle with God’s power. In fact, they are stellar examples of how to remain steadfast in His omnipotence. And they even provide a practical way to face fear.

Compelling Power

In Mark 5, Jesus arrives by boat to the region of Gerasenes and is met by a demon-possessed man living among the tombs. The demons had terrorized and taken over his life, so much so that he was banished from society. The townspeople attempted to quell his dangerous and erratic behavior by chaining his hands and feet, but to no avail. So, they excluded him from the community, leaving him to cry out and cut himself with stones (vs. 5).

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In verse 6, the man spots Jesus from a distance. The demons within him do, too. And together they immediately run toward Him and bow at His feet. It is worth noting the demons don’t run away from Jesus. When an enemy recognizes the opponent and flees, it is clear who has the greater power. But the fact that the demons ran toward Jesus communicates they knew Jesus was stronger. They also knew they had to bow to His authority. They were compelled.

After they bowed, Jesus commanded the demons to come out of him. The posture of the demons spoke volumes in return. They began to beg. Obedience to the command was not up for discussion: the only thing in question was what the Son of the Most High God would do with them afterwards. So, the demons began to plead with Him.

First, they begged to not be tortured. Next, they begged to not be sent out of the area. Last, they begged to be sent into some pigs. Lots of begging is going on! Begging clearly identifies who has the power in the relationship, and Jesus had all of it. In verse 13 He answers them by granting them permission to enter the pigs (who quickly ran off a cliff and drowned in the waters below). I hate to give demons credit in any situation, but I must do so in this instance. Simply put, they didn’t need to be reminded of God’s power. One look at Jesus and they crumbled in humility, knowing their fate was in His hands. Unlike us, demons don’t wonder if the task is too big, the circumstance too hard, or the struggle too ingrained. The presence of Jesus is all they need to be reminded that nothing is impossible with God (Mark 10:27).

Power in His Presence

The man in Mark 5 is not given a name, but we can all relate to him. He is the man who lost hope because his struggles appeared insurmountable. He was left to live isolated, tormented, and lonely. Life was not going to change. But then it did. The impossible was removed, but not because of the man’s efforts. All the man did was come to Jesus and Jesus did the rest. His power is that strong. His power is not dependent on one ounce of ours. His power begins by simply bringing our struggles into His presence.

➜ Be Intentional

Read (and reread!) Mark 5, swapping out your battle for the man’s battle. Ask God to use this story to increase your faith in His power.

Jen Allee is an author and speaker who believes a strong faith

is built one intentional step at a time. For encouragement in taking your next step, visit her at Living Intentionally at jenallee.com.

jenallee.com

A compassionate gift when there are no words to console. Grieving with God Journaling to Heal Your Broken Heart By Sharon Fox

A journal designed with fifteen scripture-supported topics on grief recovery. Each section of the journal provides helpful information as well as pages upon which to record the journey to contentment after a loss.

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Where’s Jesus When I’m Scared? Written by Laura E. Sandretti Illustrated by Adriana Hayes

Stephanie Seefeldt

Help for Anxious Little Ones! Where’s Jesus When I’m Scared? is about a Japanese-American girl named Natasha, who learns that even when she struggles to make good choices, Jesus’ unconditional love and presence will help her when she’s afraid. Based on the author’s childhood struggles with anxiety, this beautiful book with hand rendered illustrations, includes characters based on both the author’s and illustrator’s adopted, multi-racial children. Laura Sandretti is an active speaker, author, and columnist for Just Between Us. Visit her at laurasandretti.com

Adriana Hayes is a wife, mom, art professor, illustrator, and author. Visit her on Instagram @madebyadri

Available at laurasandretti.com and Amazon. A portion of book sales benefits Conflict Sports, a non-profit boxing club for youth in Milwaukee’s inner city.

All The Way Home: Liturgies and Legacies Order your copy today! www.stephseefeldt.com

Rooted and Grounded in God’s Love

minutes in the

WORD By Dorie Etrheim

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by circumstances, wondering, God, are You there? Do You care? If so, you’re not alone. I’ve been there too.

“Comprehend” originates from katalambano which means to grasp, lay hold of, to make something one’s own.

The early disciples, terrified by a great storm, also posed the same question to Jesus: “Don’t you care…” (Mark 4:38)? Often, the storms in our lives can consume us with panic and fear, and we can lose sight of God’s love for us.

“Being rooted and grounded in love” goes beyond mere knowledge; it’s experiencing God’s love moment by moment, becoming people of love who are filled and flooded with God Himself.

On my faith journey, the more I’ve focused on the sudden storms swirling around me, the more I’ve looked to people or things to fill me with love rather than Jesus. I’ve desperately searched for love in all the wrong places. In these uncertain times, rooted deep inside me was the question, “If you really knew me, would you still love me?” It was a lonely season. How can we intentionally stay rooted and grounded in God’s love while storms whirl around us? Thankfully, God’s unwavering truth remains, even if we can’t feel it. We are loved and embraced by the One who sacrificed His only Son for us. Amazing love! The apostle Paul, writing from prison, reminds us to grasp and hold on to this immeasurable love of Christ.

Intentionally carve out time in your day to soak in God’s love. Meditate on the following Scriptures and let God’s love saturate your heart and soul. • Jeremiah 31:3 • Isaiah 43:1, 4 • Psalm 139:13 • Romans 8:35-39 Henri Nouwen says, “Becoming the Beloved is pulling the truth revealed to me from above down into the ordinariness of what I am thinking of, talking about, and doing from hour to hour.” What might it look like to intentionally practice this in your everyday life?

Take a fresh look at Ephesians 3:14-19. List what Paul prays for the Ephesians and for us today.

For Your Journal Spend some time journaling about the following:

• When storms come, list some reminders that Jesus knows you, He is with you, and He loves you. • Ask Jesus to reveal where your roots are grounded.

Digging Deeper

• What’s one intentional step you can take to foster deeper roots in God’s inexhaustible love?

Peek back at Ephesians 3:14-19. Note the words “rooted,” “grounded,” and “comprehend.”

• Journal a prayer expressing your gratitude for His love for you.

“Rooted” originates from the Greek word rhizoo, which appears only twice in the New Testament: here in Ephesians 3:17 and Colossians 2:7. Rooted signifies being firmly fixed, strengthened, and established.

“Rejoice with those who rejoice.”

“Grounded” comes from themelioo, meaning a secure foundation, steadfastness.

ROMANS 12:15

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Imagine your roots continuously sinking deep into the nourishing soil of God’s endless love. Even amid life’s storms, you are held secure in His loving embrace, leaving no room for doubt about His love for you.

INTENTIONAL

J ournal

THIS MONTH, THE FIRST THING I’LL DO WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING IS:

WRITE A MESSAGE TO GOD EXPRESSING YOUR GRATITUDE FOR HIS BLESSINGS.

MAKE A CHECKMARK FOR EVERY TIME I INTENTIONALLY PRAYED FOR SOMEONE.

✿ THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR:

PRAISES:

✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿

INTENTIONAL FAITH HABITS S

NOTES: ȷustbetweenus summer 2024 41

FAITH AT WORK

From Colleagues to CEOs

by Danielle Thomas

hen was the last time you prayed for a coworker? What about your boss? Your company’s CEO? I’m sure we can recall a time when we’ve prayed for a colleague about something they’re going through, whether family life, health struggles, or work stresses, but I’m guessing most of us have rarely, if ever, prayed for our company’s leadership, or even our own manager. At church, we regularly pray over our world leaders, petitioning God to strengthen, uplift, and guide them in making decisions. I concluded that if we’re praying for our politicians and government, why would we also not pray for our work leaders and coworkers?

Pray for All Those in Authority

First Timothy 2:1-2 urges us that “petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people—for kings and all those in authority.” I believe this extends to those in authority in the workplace too. Although we may cynically think our company presidents and boards of directors are mainly interested in lining their own pockets, they are still placed in roles of power over us and need our prayers as much as anyone else. When we’re thinking about our higher-ups, we should pray for them in the same way we ask God to guide our prime ministers and presidents. We can pray for virtues like wisdom, humility, compassion, and grace as they lead our companies. We can ask God to direct their decisions for the good of their employees, customers, and those impacted by the organization. We can ask God to guard their hearts against greed and selfish ambition.

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Pray for Your Managers

Likewise, we should pray for our own managers at work. Although the language is different, we can draw from what the Bible has to say about master-slave relationships, and our responsibility to serve our bosses well.

In Ephesians 6:5, Paul writes, “Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ.” Should obedience and diligence in our work not also involve praying for our managers, who guide our teams, direct our projects, and offer us support? Prayer is a pretty important part of working well for our bosses. We can thank God for the opportunity our managers have given us to work for them and pray for their leadership of our team.

Pray for Your Coworkers

Finally, we can probably all name one coworker who may be struggling right now. For many of us, coworkers become our friends, even unofficial “family” with whom we share daily experiences, workplace challenges and successes, and even time outside of work. So, for our colleagues, it’s just as important to pray for them—including all areas of their lives. Although we may see our favorite coworker every day and our company’s CEO on a monthly all-hands call, the frequency with which we interact with colleagues shouldn’t impact our calling as Christians in the workplace to pray. Ephesians 6:18 encourages us to “pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests”—basically to never stop praying! This charge doesn’t pause in the company parking lot and start again when we leave the office.

Pray for Salvation

We may pray about different topics for different coworkers as time goes on, but above all, we should pray for one prevailing thing: salvation through Christ. So, if you find yourself stuck on what to pray for your company president today, why not pray for him or her to one day know Jesus and walk in relationship with Him?

Danielle Thomas works in corporate communications for

a national telecoms company in the UK. She lives with her British husband, Caleb, and Cavapoo puppy. She enjoys hiking, exploring the countryside, and learning UK history.

thethomases2020@gmail.com

OUTSIDE YOUR FRONT DOOR

Who’s in Control? by Ashley N. Thomas Ilike to be in control. Maybe more accurately, I like to have control. Control assures that my people, place, and things will be taken care of. After all, it is within my power to do so, right? I often justify my behavior because my motive is good—I want what is best— and I have convinced myself that I know what that is. My best includes safety, security, and simply good things…and too often my attempt at perfection. While we are given wisdom, discernment, and the incredible opportunity to make choices—we can’t see the full picture, and even if we could, we don’t hold the power to make adjustments. Honestly, thank goodness. I’ve been reading through Job lately, and I am at the part in the text where: “The LORD speaks” (Job 38). It is a breath of fresh air, and in many ways feels like resolution is right around the corner. After listening to Job’s friends and Job’s own confessions and crying out, a sigh of relief escapes my being as I am finally at the part where the Lord’s take has arrived. Things that hit home:

1. So Many Questions. In a moment where God

could clearly direct Job and his friends on where they have gotten things wrong—He uses the time to ask questions. Questions signify curiosity and an opportunity to engage in dialogue. When I find myself thinking I have all the answers, am I willing to ask questions? If not, I may be moving too quickly, or isolating myself, when I could benefit from a different perspective.

2. Details vs. the Big Picture. There is a process

3. God’s Grace and Provision. God’s stories are

good. He wastes nothing. He can use any circumstance, setback, or trial for His good. He lacks nothing, and because that is true, He wastes nothing that happens under His scope. Job endured a lot of hardship, and we get a glimpse into his life moving forward. But before we get caught up in the things he received, let’s not forget the hope he had with him from that day forward and the grace he had to live life well, and encourage others in too. As Job is restored, he speaks these words: “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’ Surely I spoke things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know” (Job 42:2-3). As you find your grip tightening or loosening as you seek to gain control, may you trust and know that you serve a God who can do all things. May that bring you the peace that you need. You don’t have to have it all together. He has you and He cares for you, your family, and friends. As you step outside your front door, the great temptation may be to control the outcome, but my hope for you is that our great Hope would lead the way. His ways are above our ways, and He always has our (and others’) best interest at heart.

Ashley N. Thomas is the executive director of Hope Street

ministry in Milwaukee, Wis. She enjoys teaching, writing, learning, and being present with broken people as each discovers the grace that allows us all to be known and loved still. She is a wife, mom to a son (Jedidiah), and fur baby (Belle).

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for everything. Being someone who likes to follow rules and guidelines, I appreciate a clear “this is how things are done.” Yet, I don’t think that is the full point of why the Lord chooses to walk Job through so many scenarios. The point He is making is that He is sovereign. He is a God of good intentions, and His ways are above our ways. That could frustrate you, or

you could choose to allow it to bring you a tremendous amount of peace—peace that comes with the relief valve that you don’t have to have all the answers, but you do know the One who does.

LIVING WELL

Nowhere Between Two Somewheres

by Gail Goolsby

quit my job to have children and then moved to a new city. No one knows me at my new church, neighborhood, or even at my local coffee shop. I feel lost and invisible.”

“In college, with my sorority and campus ministry work, I felt secure and defined. Now I am back at my parents’ home looking for a job. Some days I feel like I am rolling backwards stuck in nowhere land.” “When I retired, I envisioned all sorts of ways to fill my time. But I don’t know where to start. Some days I don’t leave the house, stay in my pajamas, and watch mindless TV. I hardly recognize myself.” When anyone is faced with change, good or bad, turmoil starts internally. William Bridges calls transition the Neutral Zone (NZ), the nowhere between two somewheres, in Managing Transitions: Making the Most of Change (2003). Those in transition feel like they fell into a no man’s land, stuck between past known identities/realities and unknown new ones.

What Possible Benefit Comes from Transitions?

When change happens, some thing(s) must end before some thing(s) can begin. Endings are a form of dying, which can cause relief, but most often causes grief. With grief comes denial, anger, bargaining, panic, sadness, and uncertainty in various forms and for indeterminate periods of time. Other NZ symptoms include low motivation, self-doubt, anxiety, depression, memory lapses, illness, fatigue, resentment, defensiveness, fear, and hopelessness.

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At the end of my seven years in Kabul, Afghanistan, I tried to prepare for the re-entry transition. I had a two-year departure plan in place. But, during the second year of training my successors, I was fired.

Instead of being able to move methodically into leaving, I felt hurled into change prematurely. The negative, shameful whirlwind of dismissal added to

my transition fog. The carefully constructed goals to finish well were ripped away. I remember several months of sitting in my bathrobe with no sense of time or purpose. Because of my situation, my husband also had to leave his work. For almost two years, both of us were deep in our re-entry nightmare. I did my best to embrace the ups and downs of this major life event, to gain from the pain and not deny my mistakes (and others’) or run away. I spent months on forgiveness work, and recovering emotionally, physically, and spiritually with the help of Christian professionals, spiritual mentors, family members, and friends.

God Knows Where We Are and Where We’re Going

God has given access to His help through prayer and the counsel of the Holy Spirit. Time spent gleaning wisdom and faithful promises from His Word are essential anchors to anyone wandering in the fog of the NZ. Self-care, supportive relationships, intentional emotional release, reflections on past positives and achievements, and engaging a counselor or life coach to help navigate the NZ are practical steps someone in transition can take. Do your best to embrace the ups and downs of the NZ. Determine to gain from the pain and not deny or run away. You will come out on the other side with God’s help and focused self-discovery, sunlight shining once again on a new day with new emotional muscles, new life appreciation, new purpose and identity, and new stories to tell.

Gail Goolsby, MA, MEd, ACC is an author, speaker, ICF certified life coach, and career educator, including serving overseas as detailed in her book, Unveiled Truth: Lessons I Learned Leading the International School of Kabul. She is a mom, grandma, and lives in south central Kansas with her pastor-husband.

gailgoolsby.com

EVERYDAY TRANSFORMATION

Anger’s Angst by Laura Sandretti

y daughter chuckled when I told her that Gary Chapman’s book on anger was making me angry. His tips on managing anger seemed over-simplified and unrealistic. It insulted my intelligence and countless attempts to manage my rage over the years. So, I ignored the book for a few days, but thankfully picked it up again a few days later.

Definitive vs. Distorted Anger

Being reminded that Chris was being who he had learned to be felt like an excuse that let him off the hook. But then I had a Spirit-inspired epiphany: an epiphany I didn’t like and that ironically had to do, once again, with my anger.

Distorted anger is a response to a perceived wrong like “disappointment, an unfulfilled desire, a frustrated effort, a bad mood, or any number of things that have nothing to do with a moral transgression.”

When our kids were young, I was often harsh, sarcastic, and demeaning toward my husband. I felt overwhelmed at times as a stay-at-home mom and resented his work and travel schedule. I missed my teaching job and the affirmation that came with working outside the home. Although none of this was Chris’ fault, he often got the brunt of my angst. Over the years, he’d learned to be withdrawn and non-communicative to avoid my unfair attacks.

In the book, Chapman explains the difference between definitive and distorted anger. Definitive anger is a response to wrongdoing and is born out of legitimate wrongs. God’s wrath in the Old Testament is an example of definitive anger.

Chapman gave the example of a highly perfectionistic and orderly woman named Jill, who was often angry with her creative, but messy and unorganized husband, Jeff. However, Chapman explains that Jill’s anger was distorted because, “Jeff has committed no wrong; Jeff is being the person Jeff has learned to be.” I reread that sentence several times. I read it filling in my kids’ names instead of Jeff’s. When I put my husband’s name in place of Jeff’s—I paused for a long time. “Chris has committed no wrong; Chris is being the person Chris has learned to be.” My husband and I, recent empty nesters, had been struggling. I didn’t realize how much my kids filled my emotional bucket. When they left for college, my husband’s lack of enthusiasm or response to the things I was passionate about left me feeling sad, lonely, and sometimes angry.

Examining My Anger

Normally, a revelation like this would’ve made me feel condemned, shameful, and guilty. But after thinking about how I had treated my husband and the longterm impact it had on his confidence and ability to be more open with me, the Spirit mercifully prompted me to insert another name into the sentence about Jeff learning to be who Jeff was: my own.

What Christ Says About My Anger

Part of my anger stems from being annoyed with the person I’ve learned to be. I have regretted the angry wife and mother I’ve often been, and my inability to improve. But intentionally and repeatedly receiving Christ’s forgiveness for all my wrongs—definitive or distorted—is helping me respond differently when I’m angry. It’s helping me see myself as Christ does. Remembering that I’m also the person I’ve learned to be has been giving me the grace I need to replace my distorted views of myself and others, with God’s definitive unconditional love and compassion for each of us.

Laura Sandretti, MATS, is an author, faith coach, and active

conference and retreat speaker. She is a former high school teacher who uses humor and real-life examples to challenge women to think more deeply about what they believe about God, the Bible, and themselves because of the cross of Christ. Laura has four adult children, has been married for 30 years, and prays daily for grandchildren. (See ad for Laura’s new children’s book on page 39.)

laurasandretti.com G facebook.com/laurasandrettiblog Ö twitter.com/laurasandrettiblog

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On some level I knew Chris wasn’t committing a moral transgression, but I repeatedly got angry at what felt like him being apathetic and disengaged.

Identifying Solutions

BETWEEN FRIENDS

What Are You Wearing? by Shelly Esser

his is the time of year that we’re changing over our wardrobes from winter clothes to summer ones. That’s often an entire Saturday project for me. I look forward to swapping out my long-sleeve tops and sweaters for lighter, less bulky ones. It feels so good to get away from the darker colors in exchange for brighter options, especially in Wisconsin, where I live, where summer clothes have a short shelf life.

What the Experts Tell Us

When you think about it, we spend an awful lot of time on our wardrobes, don’t we? A recent study from a British celebrity fashion website revealed how many items of clothing a woman is likely to go through between the ages of 18 and 80. In the course of their lifetime, women on average have 1,116 tops, 620 dresses, 310 skirts, 372 sweaters, 558 pants or jeans, 248 coats or jackets, and 434 pairs of shoes. And women spend an average of $125,000 on clothes by the end of their lives. These numbers shocked me! Despite all the money spent on clothes, the study also says 60 percent of women struggle to find something to wear on a daily basis. Maybe you can relate! Think about all the hours we spend trying on clothes, buying clothes, selecting what to wear, looking for that perfect outfit for that special occasion, and washing our clothes—a lot of time and money is spent on a wardrobe that will eventually fade away.

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A Wardrobe That Won’t Fade Away

There’s a more important wardrobe we should care about. It’s our spiritual wardrobe—and it’s the one God wants us to wear daily. Why? Because it will never get worn out, fade, have to be replaced because we’ve gained or lost a few pounds, or go out of style. And it’s the only wardrobe that will have a lasting impact on the lives around us. Colossians 3:12 says, Therefore, as God’s holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. I can’t think of a more impactful and life-changing wardrobe than that!

What would it look like if we intentionally let the Holy Spirit pick out our clothes each day—that instead of focusing on the things that fade and the styles that don’t last—we focus on a spiritual wardrobe that will always make us look beautiful and more like Christ. It will always fit and will always make a statement. How might the people in our lives be impacted if we intentionally concentrated on wearing compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience every day?

A Wardrobe That Changes the World

Imagine if instead of wearing 1,116 tops or 434 pairs of shoes in our lifetime, we wore 1,116 acts of kindness or 434 acts of compassion. How would we stand out and what a difference we would make in the lives of the hurting people around us—those who need to see Jesus up close and personal? Wearing a wardrobe like that could change the world. That’s how the apostle Paul is urging us to get dressed every morning. What if people walked away after being with us saying, “What a kind or compassionate person she is” instead of, “What a great outfit she had on?” What if we make it an intentional goal every time we encounter someone to leave behind the beautiful spirit found in Colossians 3:12? That the first thing they see in us is Christ. Are you ready to switch over your closet to a new wardrobe this summer? Who needs some compassion, kindness, gentleness, patience, or humility in their life that only you can give? God will use us in all kinds of ways often starting with the clothes we are dressing our spirits in. So intentionally put your spiritual wardrobe on every morning from head to toe—and let’s change the world together!

Shelly Esser has been the editor of Just Between Us for over

30 years. Additionally, she has been involved with leading and nurturing women in Christ since college. She and her husband have four adult daughters, two sons-in-law, a grandson, and live in Menomonee Falls, Wis.

What if the most beautiful kind of faith is the type that has been tested and tried? As the visionary and cofounder of Daystar Television Network, Joni Lamb has had a remarkable journey. In her new book, Through the Storm, Storm, Joni candidly opens up about the relentless challenges she’s overcome of establishing and growing the network to the personal struggles she’s faced. But even in the midst of each obstacle, she unwaveringly sought the Lord to find rest in His goodness and mercy.

Discover how you can have this same resilience and redemption present in your own life and testimony!

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