Real Faith

Texting My Mother-inLaw’s Son by Laura Sandretti

Laura Sandretti is a Christian speaker, author, and blogger. Laura just finished her second book, Imperfectly Perfect, A Devotional for the Transformed Everyday Sinner. Laura has been married to her husband Chris for 27 years and has three children. Laura’s books are available online on Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

Visit my site! laurasandretti.com My son, who just started his freshman year of college, is sick. For the first time, Casey feels miserable, and I’m not there. I can’t make him chicken soup and ask him the infamously dorky question I always ask on the rare occasion when I cook from scratch, “Can you taste the love?” Instead, I’ve been texting him and trying to encourage him in the stress of being sick and traversing college.

However, today, I wasn’t thinking about Casey. I was brought to tears thinking about my husband, Chris. Four years ago, Chris lived in Canada for his job for six months of the winter. In that time, he got the flu, missed out on our kids’ lives, and missed his bed, couch, and having home-cooked meals. That assignment was for the first phase of a project recently launched; Chris is overseeing the deployment.

When I texted Chris that I was praying for the launch and for his leadership, he said my text was well timed. My husband is incredibly calm and unflappable. His pulse rate is usually in the 50s (or as I call it, “half alive”), but this week I think it’s pushing into the 60s. Chris isn’t only overseeing a national company-wide computer conversion; he is overseeing hundreds of people. That means hundreds of opinions, emotions, and all other things that come from complex, bright, amazing, difficult, and everything in between people. Chris texted me that he was grateful for my encouragement right when he needed it.

I forget my 50-something husband used to be a 19-year-old son. He has fears, challenges, and struggles too and needs what every son needs. He needs to know he is loved, appreciated, prayed for, and believed in. He needs to feel, hear, and “taste the love,” just as much as our son Casey does.

That’s when I got choked up. Not because I texted him at the right time, but because I forgot how much he needs it.

It’s easy for me to encourage my son and be his biggest fan when he’s sick or struggling, but I forget. I forget my 50-something husband used to be a 19-year-old son. He has fears, challenges, and struggles too and needs what every son needs. He needs to know he is loved, appreciated, prayed for, and believed in. He needs to feel, hear, and “taste the love,” just as much as Casey does. Oh, how I’ve forgotten that. I see Chris as independent, strong, and steady. Sometimes, I subconsciously think my compliments, gratitude, and encouragement will be received from him kind of, like when your mom says, “You’re the best, honey!” Sometimes, I’ve been so focused on my children, work, and ministry that I’ve failed to remember that just like there’s still a little girl in me who wants to be pretty and craves my dad’s approval, Chris needs voices encouraging, affirming, and reminding him that he’s doing great, I’m proud of him, and I’m praying for him.

Maybe the Spirit is prompting you to encourage your motherin-law’s son today, too. Go for it. They’ll both be grateful you did.

41 just between us SPRING 2020