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DECEMBER 23, 2021 | The Jewish Home The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015
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Life C ach
You Can Become Ageless By Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., LMFT, CLC, SDS
T
he aging process? At any age, the best way to confront it is to forget it. Only your birth certificate knows for sure! It’s the last thing that defines you. It’s not something physical – you don’t wear it or display it anywhere. It’s not something intellectual – learning more or less doesn’t change it. The truth is, it has nothing to do with who you are. In fact, most of the time, it’s just something you don’t want to dwell on. When you’re young, you want to grow up already. When you’re old, you think you want to be young again. But how you actually feel has more to do with your mindset, the energy you put in, genetics, and a large dose of good, old-fashioned mazal than anything else. How you look probably has to do with just that, too. So forget about age. It locks you in a cage. Go for a new page. Set a different stage. Stop thinking that you want to be younger or older or date someone
younger or older. Think about the things that really make a difference. What am I doing right now? What do I want to be doing? What qualities does that person I want to be with have that I like? When you are dating, see the ac-
ability – none of it is about years you’ve been on earth. Some people stop “growing” way too young. And I don’t mean in height! Some are born with wisdom beyond their years. Some are late bloomers. Nothing is set in stone.
We can’t flip back calendar pages and magically become younger or older.
tual person. Check that you’re at a similar stage. Stop using numbers to decide whether to engage. Age can be so misleading. For example, there are people numerically younger who are way older than you – with their outlooks, looks, or even destiny. And there are people older than you who are actually young, energetic, and on the move in so many ways. Fun, maturity, intellect, drive,
Don’t get hung up on age – yours or others. It’s not something we can actually change. We can’t flip back calendar pages and magically become younger or older. instead, expend your time and eno ergy on things that you can affect and that can affect you. The kind of things that help you grow up when you need to. The kind of things that help you stay young when you want to. And the
kind of things that keep you moving ahead and getting the most out of each day. When you or anyone else focuses on age, you are actually losing focus. It doesn’t even predict health or longevity. What matters is what we can impact. You want to think about time and not wasting it, using it well. Sure, you can use birthdays to celebrate life. And parties to enjoy others and to make people feel important and valued. But it’s not the number of candles on the cake that defines you. It’s what you do with your flame!
Rivki Rosenwald is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist working with both couples and individuals and is a certified relationship counselor. Rivki is a co-founder and creator of an effective Parent Management of Adolescent Years Program. She can be contacted at 917705-2004 or at rivkirosenwald@gmail. com.
