By Lorna Wittenrich, Jewish Family & Community Services
Moms Should Prioritize
mental wellness during difficult times
T
o say that being a parent can be tough is an understatement—but as all moms and dads know, it’s one of the most rewarding jobs in the world. While the strain of a global pandemic and subsequent shift of societal norms has undoubtedly been difficult for all parents, mothers in particular are feeling intense strain. Through our work at Jewish Family & Community Services’ Dupont Counseling Group, we’ve noticed the acute impact that the last few months have had on moms. We’ve helped many of them find peace and balance with strategies for self-care that are important to share—but first, one must Mental examine the causes for chaos.
one curating and managing a never-ending to-do list in your head: what needs to get done, for who, and when – then, delegating those tasks and making sure they actually get done.
One study published in the American Sociological Review explains mental load as the responsibility of "anticipating needs, identifying options for filling them, making decisions, and monitoring progress." The burden of a family’s mental load often falls heavily on moms and can sap time and energy even more during times of uncertainty. For many, the recent stress load they’re feeling is due in part to a much heavier mental load managing an encompasses not the It’s no secret that the COVID-19 unexpected turn of events. The physical tasks, but crisis stopped almost every aspect simple solution is to take time to of day-to-day routine and release yourself from the mental rather the overseeing of structure on a dime. One load whenever possible. those tasks... morning, children were in school, With many families spending restaurants were open, and more time together under the same businesses were functioning as roof all day long, taking a few normal, but seemingly the very next minutes to be alone and unwind seems day, everything shifted. This abrupt nearly impossible. So how can moms change—caused by a then largelyfind ease among the mental clutter? In unknown virus—was anxiety-provoking on short, prioritize your solitude and make its own. Add in strict social distancing mental health maintenance a habit. mandates and the inherent isolation they caused, and a A great way to ease into taking time for yourself is to perfect storm began to brew for parents. wake up before the rest of your household. Whether it is an entire hour early or just a few minutes, this quiet time Both stay-at-home mothers and those in the workplace allows for uninterrupted peace where nothing is needed began to not only take in the stresses of their own roles, but from you. It is simply time to refuel, reflect and breathe also absorbed many of the challenges faced by their children before the rest of the day takes over. In fact, Psychology and partners due to the pandemic. School-aged kids were Today notes that even just 30 minutes of solitude per day suddenly unable to see their friends, and toddlers were helps reboot the brain, enhance concentration and suddenly without childcare. And while many parents split productivity, and can even improve relationships. It’s duties, women often take the brunt of a family’s “emotional important to normalize alone time so that you can allow labor” or “worry work,” also known as the mental load. your mind to truly relax.
curating a never ending to-do list in your head
The mental load encompasses not the physical tasks, but rather the overseeing of those tasks. It means you are the
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As a counseling group, we know that in addition to finding quiet time for self-care, it is equally important to