Shofar Cheshvan/Kislev 5772
Jewish Family Congregation www.jewishfamilycongregation.org
November 2011
From the Rabbi’s Desk YOM KIPPUR SERMON 5772 May NOT be reproduced without written permission from Rabbi Carla Freedman.
cover to our particular offenses. Safety in numbers, or something like that.
But, all the while that we are doing this, reading confessions in the plural, each of us is present as a unique indiIf you have been paying attention tonight to the language vidual. And no one else can know what is weighing on the of our prayers, and if you will pay attention again tomor- heart of another person. row, you will note that they are expressed in the plural: we But we can make some educated guesses. say, for example, "we have sinned", not "I have sinned". This is not at all different from most of our Jewish liturgy, There are some amongst us tonight who are worrying which is also expressed in the plural. We speak of Adonai about their children ... are the kids keeping up at school, "our Gd" ... Elohyenu. We ask Gd to bless us, Barkheynu. are they turning into the kind of young adults I want them The texts of the morning blessings that we chant early in to be, have I as a parent provided them with a healthy environment in which to develop good values, am I guiding the High Holy Day morning services, however, are expressed in the singular: we thank Gd there for providing all them to make good choices and decisions in their lives? my needs, and for removing sleep from my eyes. And the Or, has my child already been derailed ... is he suffering ... traditional text of the silent prayer opens with Elohai, my how can I help her, now that she is nearly grown up? And there are more fundamental concerns: in this uncertain Gd, and refers to my tongue" and concludes with refereconomy, willi be able to provide the basic necessities for ences to the words of my mouth and the meditations of my kids? If there are medical or psychological issues as my heart. Then the plural returns, in the last line, which well, the challenges increase significantly. A parent can speaks about Gd making peace for us. feel very much alone in facing these issues, despite the The parts of our prayers that are expressed in the plural crowd around us. are the ones that are expected to be said or sung by the whole assembly. The parts that are expressed in the singu- Some are dealing with aging parents. This is a balancing lar tend to be the ones meant to be read by the individual, act, which forces us to confront conflicting priorities, and either silently or without the company of other worship- asks us to make difficult decisions. At what point does the adult child take over responsibility for the parent's medical pers. and other decisions? Am I certain of the choices the parent I have always thought this very interesting, especially in would make, were s/he able to do so? Watching a parent connection with the litanies of confession that mark Yom diminish in capacities is a painful and sad experience, Kippur. It is certainly true that we confess to a long list of which precipitates a kind of grieving, long before death sins, errors, mistakes, offenses, knowing that we individu- arrives. And as the beloved parent fades, does the adult ally are probably not guilty of them all. But we read these child almost wish for the relief that death will bring? If so, lists aloud as a community anyway, giving cover, as it is that wrong? Might it not be a desire to preserve the digwere, to the ones who have committed sins that we our- nity of the parent, which extended life will erode steadily? selves have not committed, while their participation gives
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