My Two Left Feet! Art Imitates Life
One of my favorite movies is Best in Show co-starring Catherine O’Hara and Eugene Levy, who claimed he couldn’t dance because he had “two left feet” because he actually had two left feet. While I love being a gay man, I didn’t get the dancing gene. I’ve tried with tragic results. I dance like Elaine Benes on Seinfeld, one of my favorite sitcoms. It’s best dancing is left to the gifted, the passionate, the professionals and their students.
This month we celebrate the art of dance for the popular annual event, “Dancing for one•n•ten.” The fundraising is in full “swing” (so to speak). The competition is Sunday, August 13 at Tempe Center for the Arts. Thank you, Scotty Kirby, for the great photos of this year’s contestants. There’s still time to donate and get tickets online at onenten.org
While I promised my editor Deon Brown that I wouldn’t talk about the weather in my column anymore, I have to say this summer
■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ and ■■■■■■■. ■■■■! There. I said it. [It’s okay … just this one time, Jack. — ed.]
We also have some great LGBTQ summer 2023 reading suggestions (in addition to reading everything in this issue) and great streaming reviews, All that Heaven Allowed and Eldorado: Everything the Nazis Hate.
So even though it’s ■■■ outside, there is more to do inside than ever. Plenty of great restaurants, bars, concerts, theatre, and events all month long. Stay patient, stay hydrated, play safe and have fun! Use ION as your guide to all the good times in and out of the Valley of the ■■■!
Jack M. Tesorero (Not a) Dancing QueenAPP | SOCIAL | VIDEO | MAGAZINE
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PHX ATTRACTIONS
Bingo Nights with PHX Fray
Bring your favorite lucky trolls, Beanie Babies, Kewpie dolls (and some money!) and get ready to yell, “BINGO!” PHX Fray is playing Bingo! Win prizes and enjoy drink discounts. Maybe you’ll win! #FrayLife. Boycott Bar, 4301 N. 7th Ave. in Phoenix.
Every other Tuesday starting Aug. 1 thru’ Nov. 1 from 6:30-8 p.m.
Lift Off: The Red Party
Hey, Asstronauts! Fire up your rocketship and journey to a mysterious Red Planet and get your orbital bebop on under the stars with DJ Matt Consola. You don’t have to go to the Milky Way. Discount tickets & VIP room reservations at MineshaftWeekend.com. The launch happens at the Egyptian Motor Hotel, 765 Grand Ave. in Phoenix.
Saturday, August 5 from 8 p.m.-2 a.m.
Feels So Close: An EDM
Golden Era Party
Get lost in the lights and fall in love all over again with the music that led us here made from our own experiences: the festivals, the friends, those big moments. The Van Buren, 401 W. Van Buren in Phoenix. Tix: 800-745-3000 or go to TicketMaster.com
Saturday, August 5 at 9 p.m.
The Letting It Go Show!
Hey, Karma Chameleons! You come and go … relive those crazy days of the 80s with Boy George & Culture Club, Howard Jones, and Berlin. Talking Stick Resort Amphitheater, 2121 N. 83rd Ave. in Phoenix (but you won’t get there by riding on the Metro). Get your tickets at LiveNation.com or call 800-870-5300
Friday, August 18
Beyoncé - “Renaissance Tour”
The Queen Bee rides her giant, mirrored disco horse to the stage for her Renaissance World Tour where she sings the biggest hits from the 14th thru’ 16th centuries. Oops. Different Renaissance. Anyway, she’ll be selling “Lemonade” at the State Farm Stadium, One Cardinals Dr. in Glendale. For tickets call 800-745-3000 or go to TicketMaster.com
Thursday, August 24 at 7 p.m.
Circuit Overload
Get your transistors, capacitors and antennas ready for an integrated circuit party! DJ Mike Soriano and CRUMS spin in a welcoming and inclusive atmosphere at a gay party where you can dance your woofers and tweeters off! It all happens at Walter Warehouse, 747 W. Roosevelt St. in Phoenix. Search SeeTickets.us
Saturday, August 26 from 9 p.m. - 2 a.m.
SCREW
Grab your tool, get a hammer and start pounding! Celebrate Labor Day at this theme party. Come dressed in uniform: construction worker, military, firefighter, or maybe even a plumber! DJ Allison Nunes spins while go-go dancers go, go, go! You might get nailed! See you at the Cash Nightclub, 1730 E. McDowell Rd. Search Eventbrite.com for tix.
Saturday, September 2, 9 p.m.-2 a.m.
Sam Smith - “Gloria Tour”
This British performer has gone from shy crooner to bad boy, taking his GLORIA tour on the road. It’s “Vulgar” and “Unholy” some might say … but we love him. He’ll have you begging, “Stay With Me” at the Footprint Center, 201 E. Jefferson in downtown Phoenix. For tickets call 800-745-3000 or check out TicketMaster.com
Sunday, September 3 at 8 p.m.
Book-ish
Summer is a great time of year to grab a good, new book. Fiction, history, self-help, memoirs … we read not just to make ourselves smarter, but also to enjoy a good story and learn a lesson about the world around us. Books can be a personal roadmap. Live so that if your own life was a book, Florida would ban it.
You owe it to yourself to read books (not just Grindr.) Celebrity, director and writer John Waters said, “If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books—don’t fuck ‘em!”
Don’t like to read? You just haven’t found the right book. offers a few diverse LGBTQ titles for you. So, read a book. You just get laid, too.
365 Gays of the Year
by Lewis Laney, illustrated by Charlotte Macmillan-ScottA fun and fascinating compendium of LGBTQ+ icons, one for every day of the year – plus one for leap year – and a celebration of fabulous queer history. Discover your queer idol who helped pave the way and learn something new every day. Everyone from sexy Alexander the Great to Kim Petras, plus twelve honorary allies have a page with snappy, bite-size biographies and colorful portraits. Discover some unsung heroes who made our world a better place along the way.
White Lion Publishing. Hardcover, 384 pp.
Available on Amazon for $25.
Book-ish
Photo by: LeakedGlass Model: Michael Terwilliger Book selections by: Deon BrownBad Gays: A Homosexual History
By Huw Lemmey & Ben MillerSure, there’s the luminaries of queer history, like Leonardo da Vinci and Sylvia Rivera. But what about the villains and nogoodniks? Discover the bastards and baddies. Ask yourselves what we can learn about LGBTQ history and our emerging identities through these rascals who challenged mainstream ideologies. Based on the popular podcast, the authors excavate the buried history of amusing, disturbing, fascinating and scrofulous queer lives.
Verso Publishing. Hardcover, 368 pp. SRP $30. Available on Amazon for $18
Boyslut: A Memoir and Manifesto
By Zachary ZaneYou’ll love sex and relationship columnist Zachary Zane’s tantalizing essays about how society shames people for sex and sexuality examined through the lens of his own bisexuality and self-described sluttiness. From stories of drug-fueled threesomes and risqué Grindr hookups to dealing with rejection, Boyslut is reassuring and often painfully funny—but it’s also a testimony that we can all learn to live healthier lives unburdened by the stigma of America’s puritanical hand-me-downs.
Harry N. Abrams, publisher. Hardcover, 240 pp. SRP, $26. Available on Amazon for $22
You Driver Is Waiting
By Priya GunsDamani is tired. She lives paycheck to paycheck, driving for a ride share. She gives a ride to Jolene, who seems like the perfect girlfriend. As their romance intensifies and Damani lets her guard down, Jolene does something unforgivable, setting off an explosive chain of events. This social satire inspired by the iconic film Taxi Driver is a wild read brimming with dark comedy, and social commentary.
Penguin Random House, Hardcover 320 pp. SRP $26. Available on Amazon for $21
The Big Reveal: An Illustrated Manifesto of Drag
By Sasha Velour“If we want to be seen as legendary,” writes Sasha, “we have to weave ourselves into history.” Winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race season 9, Velour tells her own journey to success, disaster, and more. She also uncovers the history of queer life that illuminated drag as a form of expression that brings sparkling substance to our understanding of drag, queerness, beauty, and liberation. Even if you’re not a drag queen there’s a lesson to be learned. Illustrated with photos and Velour’s original artwork.
HarperCollins Publishers. Hardcover 240 pp. SRP $45.
Pageboy: A Memoir
By Elliot PageEllen Page burst onto the national spotlight as a quirky teen in Juno, earning him an Oscar nomination and a place among Hollywood’s coveted A-list. Thirteen years later, he came out as a trans man. Now, Page is sharing that journey in his own words. No topic is off the table though, including his sex life (he details steamy affairs with a Juno co-star and other celebrities). Readers can feel how uncomfortable he is with himself before he comes to terms with his truth.
Flatiron Books, publisher. Hardcover 288 pp. SRP $30. Available on Amazon for $19
Get your cha-cha on, everyone! It’s time for “Dancing for one·n·ten.” The community’s support of directly contributes to the growth and success of one·n·ten’s identity-based programs for Black, Indigenous, youth of color and transgender and gender expansive youth, as well as one n ten’s many other empowering programs.
“‘Dancing for one n ten’ is more than an event, it’s a celebration of dedication and a chance to make a life-changing impact,” said Clayton Davenport, Senior Director of Development & Marketing for one·n·ten. “These incredible dancers leave it all on the stage.” You won’t want to miss this!
Scan the QR code by each dancer’s photograph to donate.
Be sure to catch the show on Sunday August, 13 at the Tempe Center For The Arts at 1 p.m.
Navi
Sazerac Weekly DJ’s (W)
Thunderbird Lounge
Thunderbird Lounge Loteria (W)
State Farm Stadium Beyonce
Sazerac Weekly DJ’s (W)
Roosevelt Row First Friday (M)
Chase Field #FRAYLIFE FNL (M)
Flex Spa’s Phoenix Blackout Night (W)
Location TBD PHX Takeover (M)
Charlie’s Foxxxes Music Trivia
Flex Spa’s Phoenix Blackout Night (W)
Thunderbird Lounge Throwback Party Jam (M)
The Egyptian Motor Hotel LiftOff
Charlie’s Foam Party
Charlie’s There’s Always a Party at Charlie’s
Chase Field #FRAYLIFE FNL (M)
Roosevelt Row First Friday (M)
Walter Wherehouse Circut Overload
Thunderbird Lounge Throwback Party Jam (M)
The Cash Night Club SCREW
ION CHARLIE’S
ION STREAMING
Last Call: When a Serial Killer Stalked Queer New York
This true crime miniseries focuses on the victims of serial killer Richard Rogers, who murdered and dismembered at least two gay and bisexual men in the 1990s. The media coverage, the dehumanizing tabloid journalism surrounding the murders, and biases of the criminal justice system illuminates how the LGBTQ+ community fought to solve the murders and demand fair treatment of queer crime victims.
The Other Two - season 3
There’s no people like show people! The worst thing about show people is, well, the people. Selfcentered Brooke and her gay brother Cary Dubek (Drew Tarver, a genuine, real life bisexual) scramble to “make it happen” in the business of show. Former head writers of SNL wrote this zany, over-the-top comedy about “family.” Also starring Wanda Sykes (a genuine, real life lesbian) and Molly Shannon. Sadly, this season is the last.
Red, White, & Royal Blue
Alex Claremont-Diaz, the son of the U.S. President, and Britain’s Prince Henry have a lot in common: good looks, charisma, international popularity … and a total disdain for each other. But as Alex and Henry’s icy relationship unexpectedly begins to thaw, the friction that existed between them sparks something deeper than they ever expected. (Can you guess what that is?) Picture an R-rated gay Hallmark movie, except way hotter.
Eldorado: Everything the Nazi’s Hate
Ah, Germany. Der Vaterland. Images of those funny, happy-go-lucky people who love to laugh, drink beer, eat bratwurst, and celebrate Oktoberfest instantly come to mind when you think of Deutschland. Okay. Maybe not quite.
But once upon a time back in the 1920s Weimar Republic’s capital city of Berlin was home to over 80 different queer cabarets, bars, and cafés where people of all orientations and gender expressions were free to celebrate everything that makes being queer so wunderbar. Until it wasn’t. The end of the decade marks the time when that mean little man, Adolf Hitler, rose to power and the fun and games, and gemütlichkeit were all over.
If you’ve seen the film classic Cabaret (1972) you’ll have an idea about how the Nazis chipped away at basic human rights, taking freedom away from the gays. And lesbians. And trans. And disabled. And Jews. And many more. Seems unimaginable. Almost. This documentary zeros in at the city’s rowdy, raunchy, raucous queer nightclub, Eldorado, using the hotspot to expand on queer life in Berlin 100 years ago. Personalities like legendary tennis champion, Baron Gottfried von Cramm and his relationship with gender fluid Jewish actor Manasse Herbst emerge, exploring exactly what was at stake for the tennis legend. The relationship between Toni Ebel and Charlotte Charlaque, two of the first trans women to undergo gender-affirming surgery, is examined, along with the teenage crush between the still-living Walter Arlen and his boyhood Jewish beau, lovingly nicknamed “Lumpi.”
Chilling film footage of the Third Reich’s henchmen goose-stepping through Berlin mixed with dramatic reenactments of the queer community’s real-life people helps illustrate the blood-curdling historic climate in this cautionary true life tale a “must see.” They say it can never happen again. Until it does.
“Willkommen. Bienvenue. Welcome.” To Eldorado. Available now on Netflix.
Dreamgirls
“And you, and you, and you and you, you’re gonna love me.” The story of Black singers Deena, Lorrell, and Effie, who team up with a demanding manager. As their careers begin to take off tempers flare and hearts are broken in pursuit of stardom.
Phoenix Theatre Co. 1825 N. Central Ave. & McDowell Rd. Get your tix at PhoenixTheatre.com or call 602-254-2151
August 2 thru September 3
Count Basie Orchestra
Bandleader William James “Count” Basie was an American institution who personified jazz. His band still performs sold-out concerts all over the world nearly 40 years after his death, with musicians who Basie hand-picked. MIM - Musical Instrument Museum at 4725 E. Mayo Blvd in Phoenix. Get your tickets at MIM.org or call 480-478-6000
August 9-10
Beetlejuice: the musical
“It’s showtime!” Morose teenager Lydia summons the smart-aleck bio-exorcist ghost from the netherworld to evict the spirits of her new home’s previous dead owners. You’ve seen the movie, right? Now add music and dancing to the sandworms. Don’tcha just hate ‘em? It all happens at ASU Gammage, 1200 S. Forest Ave. in Tempe. For tix go to ASUGammage.com or call 480-965-3434
August 22 thru 27
Rock Hudson: All That Heaven Allowed
This intimate portrait of hunky actor Rock Hudson celebrates his legacy as a dashing, Hollywood leading he-man who unwittingly helped change the public perception of AIDS by telling the story of a man living a double life — one whose public persona was carefully manufactured by his handlers and the studio who feared the potential career-ending revelation in tabloids like Confidential that Rock was gay. Like, really gay.
Due to his high-profile death in 1985 from AIDS Rock Hudson is arguably better known as an icon of LGBTQ history rather than for his movies. The documentary examines his personal life while taking a casual look at his movie career. (If this sounds familiar, some of this material was fodder for the salacious Netflix miniseries Hollywood, producer Ryan Murphy’s twisted blend of fact and fiction.) Various scenes from Hudson’s movies are edited into the doc for occasional, disquieting prescience, sometimes confusingly with bizarre effect. Memories of Hudson are fleshed out using voiceovers and sometimes gossipy interviews by those who either knew him personally, like Tales of the City author Armistead Maupin, his ex-boyfriend Lee Garlington, plus a touching interview with Dynasty co-star Linda Evans who discusses their controversial kiss on the show.
What shines following Hudson’s diagnosis are his deep friendships with his co-stars Dame Elizabeth Taylor (who went on to found AmfAR, one of the world’s leading nonprofit organizations dedicated to the support of AIDS research and HIV prevention. Hudson donated $250K of his own fortune to help fund it) and Doris Day who supported him when Hudson was shunned by personal friends President Ronald Reagan and First Lady Nancy Reagan.
What was Hudson’s legacy? His movies? Or his untimely death from AIDS? If Hudson’s life and death, helped advance the cause of LGBTQ rights, the film reminds us that those victories came slowly and at a considerable cost.
This is a well-thought out biography, and a grim reminder about the early days of AIDS and how it affected real people (even movie stars) and America.
Available on HBO MAX
The mercury’s rising and setting records in Arizona and things are sizzling everywhere you go. Tired of staying indoors? Got a pool? Take the plunge and cool off— if you can because this man heats everything up just a few more degrees everywhere he goes. In and out of the water.
ION Arizona is excited to feature the work of a new photographer for our magazine, Kyle Christopher Shields. We know our readers will look forward to seeing more of Kyle’s photography on our pages in the future.
Model: Jeffery Teuton
DRINK & EVENT GUIDE
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NAVIGATION
Use the ION ARIZONA APP for Google Maps turn-by-turn directions with links to UBER & LYFT!
DON’T DRINK & DRIVE!
ION FABULANCE
It’s a crazy, zany month with two Full Moons: Bookending August 1st and again on the 31st — a Blue Moon. Not only that, it’s a Retrograde Picnic with quick-witted Mercury joining horny Venus, fussy Mars, lumpy Jupiter, rule breaking Uranus, dreamy Neptune and Pluto, the survivalist. This certainly lends an intricate layer to the goal posts of your day to day life. One thing’s guaranteed: this month’s gonna be interesting. Even if you’re boring, it’s gonna be a humdinger.
ARIES Mar. 21 - Apr. 20
You’re extra-inspired, but you have to roll up your shirtsleeves to make “it” happen. (What is “it”? Tell us.) Don’t get out of control with spending. Jupiter is watching you, so you can’t do just anything. Express your potential but don’t get reckless.
ION HOMOSCOPES
TAURUS April. 21 - May 20 Stretch your creativity! Write. Bake. Photograph something. Well, something besides a dick pic. Paint something. Like, a landscape. Or your lover’s body with edible paint. Explore your talent!
GEMINI May 21 - June 21
A journey starts with one step. So make sure you have fabulous shoes. You’re anxious to put some distance between yourself and a somewhat unpleasant situation. Take that step, baby. Take another! See?
CANCER June 22 - July 22
Feeling a little emotional? It happens. Don’t let your feelings force you into surrendering. This is a golden opportunity to take a risk, but make sure it’s not illegal. It pays off and your confidence gets a boost.
LEO July 23 - Aug. 22
Change is all around. Everywhere. You probably just stepped in a pile of it. You don’t have to react to everything. Birthday Lions: luck will play a significant role for you. So does exhibitionism. (This might be a metaphor for something else, not just your genitals. Maybe.)
VIRGO Aug. 23 - Sep. 22
It’s a good time to unplug from all the mental “noise” around you. Isn’t it peaceful? Birthday Virgos can expect to streamline your life and de-clutter those broken emotions. Put on a cute outfit and go to lunch. Have a dirty martini. Charge it to Venus.
LIBRA Sep. 23 - Oct. 22
You’re looking for contentment and success. And you want it now. Understand your own needs. You know what Venus says you need? Venus says make this your skanky, slutty Summer o’ Fun! Own it!
SCORPIO Oct. 23 - Nov.23
All the weight of social commitments are weighing you down. The Moon amplifies the passion you feel. Pursue personal growth and transformation. It may involve getting naked while reaching your goals.
SAGITTARIUS Nov. 23 - Dec. 23
It’s all about organization. Planning, decision making, goals. Frankly, that sounds … safe. And boring. Add some “oomph!” to your summer! A seemingly hopeless situation turns around.
CAPRICORN Dec. 23 - Jan. 20
We all know you can be a bit set in your ways. That’s just you. Stay flexible. People are asking, “What on earth are you doing?” Ignore them. Even if you don’t know what you’re doing. (You secretly do know.)
AQUARIUS Jan. 21 - Feb. 19
You have all these expectations from others. Do you allow yourself to kowtow to these emotional umpires?
Answer: Absolutely not! Embrace your wonderful weirdness in all its glory. Advice: Don’t wear pants.
PISCES Feb. 20 - Mar. 20
You’re having an unconventional August. Hold on … that’s a good thing! Let everything flow. If anyone tries to control you or inhibit your groove (who would dare try?), well … put them in their place as only you can.