ION Arizona Magazine #125

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HALLOWEEN PARTY

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KARAMBA





A NIGHT AT THE VMA’S

More

BS WEST

PHOTOS at www.IONAZ.com



I Lost a Good Friend I’ve Never Met Throughout my life, I felt different. I thought different. But I met a person that would change my life in so many ways. He became my friend. My role model. Steve Jobs was more than just a visionary. He inspired people to think different and feel good about being different. Like being gay. Or being a Mac user in 1997 when 97% of the people were using Microsoft operating systems. He led me to believe that I could, out of my one bedroom house, create a company that could produce creative marketing and design solutions for Fortune 500 companies like Chrysler and Boeing. To believe in this kid who had a Mac and a dream. To change the world. To make it a better place. Ever so slightly. I believed in Steve and Apple so much so that in the late 90’s I invested $1500 at $17 a share. Because I believed in your vision. It went up to $150 then split and

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I eventually sold it all to start ION Magazine. Today, that stock would have been worth over $300,000. Such is life. At least I have a little magazine to show for it.

And a Mac.

We now have to push forward without him. Let us learn from Steve. That not only should we live life with a sense of urgency to create greatness, but we must continue to work toward creating a better place for that next little gay kid with a dream.

I will miss you my friend. But your spirit will live forever in our hearts and minds for years to come. Sincerely,

John Michael Tesorero iPublisher


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3819 North 3rd Street Ste. #26, Phoenix, AZ 85012

(602) 308-4662 • Fax (602) 271-0939 www.IONAZ.com

ionarizona@me.com

Publisher / FOUNDER Jack M. Tesorero - Ext. 5 .................. jacktesorero@me.com

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Kevin Bushaw - Ext. 4 ............................ kbushaw@me.com Editor Deon Brown - Ext. 3 .......................... ionazeditor@me.com PRODUCTION ASSISTANT Tom King ............................................ ionarizona@me.com PRODUCTION & Artwork SUBMISSIONS ionazproduction@me.com Advertising Sales Jack Tesorero Ext 2 - ionazsales@me.com ADVERTISING CONSULTANT Bill Knoop ..................................................... (602) 301-8457 Photographers:

Fernando Hernandez Jerry O’Conner Devin Mitchell Deon Brown Cover Photo by Devin Mitchell National Advertising Representative Rivendell Media (212) 242-6863 ContributORS:

Wes Bergman Stacey Jay Cavaliere Addison DeWitt Jackson David Kelly C. Edwards

Robert Hofmann Ted Kirby Kim Ruff Paul Sanchez

Published monthly by

1995-2011: 16 Years of Design and Creative Excellence

© 2011 JMT Designs, Inc.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

PRINTED IN PHOENIX, AZ

All original artwork and photography for ION Arizona Magazine remain property of JMT Designs, Inc, and cannot be reproduced, altered, or sold without authorization and compensation. Limited usage rights can be purchased for a small fee. NOTE: The views expressed in these articles do not necessarily reflect the views of ION Arizona, its staff, or that of its parent company. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization within ION Arizona is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons or organization. To our knowledge, all people photographed and published in ION Arizona are over the age of 18. Some photos were submitted by our readers. To our knowledge, they own the copyrights, and they have given us permission to reproduce them. If you see a picture that you own, please call us immediately and we will remove it from future publications. All copy, text, display, photos, and illustrations in the ads are published with the understanding that the advertisers are fully authorized, have secured proper written consent for the use of names, pictures, and testimonials of any living person, and that ION Arizona is not responsible for unlawful use of such content.

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Men of HomoRodeo.com If you can rope ‘em, you can ride ‘em! You won’t want to be on lone prairie without the Men Of HomoRodeo.com 2012 Calendar! See the Hunks o’ the Months at the calendar launch party on Saturday, November 5 at Bar 1 from 7-11 p.m. See y’all down at the OK Corral at 3702 N. 16th St. Bar1Bar.com

Nightfuse.com Launch Party Nightfuse.com is the Valley’s premiere event photography source, making memories special. They’re best party snapshots are on the pages of ION! Put on your best smile as they launch their new website at Brick at the Arizona Center on Wednesday, November 9 from 7-11 p.m. Entertainment, music, aerialists, dance performances galore! A SWAY Event, so it’ll be top notch! For info and to RSVP visit SWAYEvents.com/ nightfuse See ad on page 49

Alpha Boys Cabaret Take it off, baby ... take it all off! And, boy, do they! For purveyors of the fine art of the ecdysiast—or you can call it “stripping”—head on over to Alpha Boys Cabaret (formerly JJ’s Male Review) for their Grand Opening on November 11-12, with no cover! And did we mention that they’re totally nude? They are! 1702 E. McDowell Rd. Phone: 480-374-3222. See ad on page 73

Charlie’s 27th Anniversary Everybody’s favorite lil’ bitty ol’ pissant country place is having a great, big, swanky hoe-down to celebrate their 27th Anniversary on Wednesday, November 16. Enjoy 1¢ cocktails from 7-9 p.m. along with a complimentary buffet and—what else?—an all star show at 9 p.m.! Hitch up the buggy and we’ll see you there! 727 W. Camelback Rd. Phone: 602-265-0224 See ad on page 32 18

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1Voice GalaAll That Glitters Celebrate everything the 1Voice Community Center has to offer! Come to the “All That Glitters” Gala Benefit on Saturday, November 19 at the Embassy Suites North Phoenix at 2577 W. Greenway Rd. Enjoy a 3-course dinner, a silent auction and great entertainment! For more information and tickets go to 1VCC.org See ad page 38

Who’s on Top Tournament The Dating Experiment presents this first annual event benefiting 1n10 and “This Is H.O.W.” on Sunday, November 20, from 12 noon-8 p.m. Celebrity hosts, music, food, entertainment with a drag lip synch contest with Victoria Bacon & Freddie Prinze Charming! For more info search “Love Endless” on Facebook or call 623204-0489 See ad on page 2

NOVEMBER 2011 ION EVENTS LISTINGS DATE EVENT Mon Mahalo Mondays Weds Jazz w/ Kenny Thames Sat Concert Series 4 Scandalesque Student Show 9 Nightfuse.com Launch Party 12 Rocky Horror Show 13 Rock-A-Hula Luau with Olivia Gardens 16 Charlie’s 27 Anniversary 17 The Kiki Vermont Roast 18 Pink 4 A Purpose 19 Wax-A-Bear & Stuff a Turkey 20 Veteran’s Day Party 20 Who’s On Top Tournament 22 Mustache Ride 23 NakidPapis.com Party 27 STRUT 30 Barbra Seville’s Drag Race “Season 2” DECEMBER 1-30 Noche de las Luminarias 10 Festival of Trees

LOCATION CITY Hula’s Phoenix Radisson Phoenix Amsterdam Phoenix The Rock Phoenix Brick Phoenix Friends Phoenix The Rock Phoenix Charlie’s Phoenix Amsterdam Phoenix BS West Scottsdale Anvil Bar Phoenix Karamba Phoenix Irish Cultural Ctr. Phoenix icepics Phoenix Karamba Phoenix icepics Phoenix Karamba Phoenix Desert Botanical Grdn Phoenix Wyndham Hotel Phoenix

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JACKIE BEAT

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YARA SOFIA

THE ROCK

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Chiles & Chocolate Tickle your tastebuds with the decadence of chocolate and perk up your palate with zesty salsas and other unique Southwestern treats, like brownies, tacos, burritos and more. Catch the Flamenco performances! The weather’s perfect for the majestic Desert Botanical Gardens—especially if you’ve got out-of-towners coming to visit. November 11-13 at 1201 N. Galvin Pkwy. 480-941-1217 or visit DesertBotanical.org for tix & info.

Parade of the Arts Be part of this “Come As You Wish You Were” pedestrian powered parade. March, dance, sing—whatever makes you feel good! This crazy event happens on November 12 from 3-10 p.m. with the parade at 6 p.m. at the Civic Space Park, 424 N. Central Avenue in Phoenix. Visit PhoenixAnnualParadeoftheArts. com for more info.

AZ Int’l. Auto Show There ain’t nothing like a classy chassis! Be the first kid on your block to see the newest cars, trucks, minivans and SUVs that will be introduced by auto manufacturers in the upcoming year at the Arizona Int’l. Auto Show on November 18-20 at the Phoenix Convention Center. 602-262-6225. $10 tix are available on the day of the show. Visit MotorTrendAutoShows.com/phoenix for more info.

NOVEMBER 2011 ION around town listings DATE EVENT / LOCATION CITY

4-6 5 5 11-12 11-13 12-13 12 12 13 17-20 19 19 19-20 24 24-27 25-26 26

Carefree Arts & Wine Festival Dance Party - Temp Center for the Arts BillingTree Rock Block - CityScape Chuck Wagon Cook-Off - Tumbleweed Park Chiles & Chocolate Fest - Desert Botanical Pk. Spanish Market - Heard Museum Parade of the Arts - Civic Space Park Local First Fall Fest - Duck & Decanter Discover India Festival - Heritage Square Ford Ironman Triathlon - Tempe Beach Park AZ Wine Growers’ Fest at The Farm Chandler Block Party Fireland Faerie Fest - Estrella Mtn. Park ZooLights - Phoenix Zoo Arizona Int’l. Auto. - Phx Convention Ctr. Glendale Glitters Festival - Murphy Park Fantasy of Lights Parade - Tempe Beach Park

Carefree Tempe Phoenix Chandler Phoenix Phoenix Downtown Phx Phoenix Phoenix Tempe S. Phoenix Downtown Chandler Goodyear Phoenix Phoenix Downtown Glendale Tempe

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I Want My Gay TV by Robert Hofmann 26

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We Gays have filled more slots—okay,

not those kind of slots, you pig—more casting slots on Reality TV that I have to wonder: where’s the beef (cake)? Where’s the Lesbian you can cheer for? Where’s the Gay you want to go all the way (with)? Oh, sure, there’s been a few hotties, a few upstanding boys and girls, but there’ve been more than a few stereotypes tossed in the salad (pun intended) and I have to wonder: why don’t we have our own great reality show? Survivor’s first winner, Richard Hatch, was an egomaniacal knowit-all who ran around naked. Hardly someone you’d cheer for. Can you remember any others? Todd Herzog, a cute 22-year-old, won Survivor: China, and I know I cheered for him because, well, he was 22 AND cute. Survivor gave us Ami Cusack on Vanuatu, but they portrayed her as man-hater. (She’s not. It’s just the way she came off.) While Reichen Lemkuhl and his thenpartner, Chip, were cool to watch on The Amazing Race, Reichen’s current foray into reality, The A-List: New York, is like a Facts of Life reunion special. It’s horrible, but you just can’t look away. While it may be easy to root for some of the Gays on American Idol, I don’t think you’d find many Clay Aiken downloads on your friends’ iPods. Or at least any who’d admit it. It’s easy to root for the boys on Project Runway, but can’t any of those boys design something for me? Why does it always have to be a dress for Heidi Klum or a blouse for Michael Kors? Queer Eye was a great show, but they had to ruin it by bringing in “the Straight guy.”

Why couldn’t it have been Queer Eye for the Clueless Guy, and made them all Gay? And of course, the reality show made specifically for Gays, Boy Meets Boy, chapped my ass by making it a Gayguessing game by throwing in Straight contestants who were like bombs in the playing field. “I pick him.” “Sorry, he’s Straight. You lose.” While RuPaul’s Drag Race is all fabulosity (which is seriously lacking at RuPaul’s Drag U), most of us can’t relate to having to put on make up to go to work, stealing wigs from the fellow contestants and tucking. Hell, we want to flaunt, not tuck. So where does that leave us? Sure, we’ve got contestants everywhere, ‘cuz we are, Blanche, we are everywhere. But we need a show just for Gays. Put a bunch of us in a house, à la Big Brother, and see what happens. Put us in teams on an island to see if we can get off. The island, too. In the meantime, we have a win-win situation on our hands. We’ve got Carson Kressly from Queer Eye and Chaz Bono on Dancing with the Stars. Even though we have to “play with the Straights” on their shows, we can at least root for our own. GO CHAZ! GO CARSON! In the meantime, we get to see Cher! _

Robert Hofmann is the author of three books, Surrounded by Insanity, An Ordinary Madness, and his latest, One Brain Cell Away from Retarded. He lives in Wilton Manors, Florida, with his partner of 16 years and welcomes email from readers at robshof@aol.com. November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 27


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Melissa Etheridge It’s been quite a while since Melissa came through our windows and proved that she was the only one. One of the true rock ‘n’ roll greats of our time, Melissa’s music is still as strong as ever. Catch her on Friday, November 11 at the Gila River Wild Horse Pass Casino at 5040 Wild Horse Pass Blvd in Chandler. For tix visit WinGilaRiver.com or call 877-840-0457

Pink Martini Eclectic, romantic and worldly! This 13-piece “mini-orchestra” from Portland is a hit with its retro-hip, multilingual repertoire finding inspiration from every musical genre from Baroque to disco. Heck, they even sold out Carnegie Hall. Twice! See them Sunday, November 13 at Scottsdale Center for the Arts, 7380 E. 2nd St. For tix visit ScottsdalePerformingArts.org or call 480-499-8587.

Morrissey This maybe-Gay innovator from The Smiths and part of the indie music scene is considered one of the most influential artists ever. His dramatic songs bleating about doomed relationships, loneliness, the past and a rotten life made him Emo before Emo was “in.” See this genius at the historic Orpheum Theatre, 203 W. Adams St. on Sunday, November 20. For tix visit TicketMaster.com or call 800-745-3000

NOVEMBER 2011 ION Concert Calendar DATE ARTIST LOCATION

3 3 4 5 5 11 12 13 17 18 19 19 20 22 29

PHONE

Wynonna Judd Celebrity Theatre 602-267-1600 Sublime AZ State Fair 800-745-3000 Chris Brown, Bow Wow, T-Pain Ashley HomeStore Pavilion Lisa Lisa, Tone Loc AZ State Fair 800-745-3000 Sergio Mendes Scotts. Ctr. for the Arts 480-499-ARTS Melissa Etheridge Wild Horse Pass Casino 877-840-0457 Prince Royce Comerica Theatre 602-379-2888 Pink Martini Celebrity Theatre 480-499-ARTS Lady Antebellum Grand Canyon Univ. 602-639-8979 Rick Springfield Wild Horse Pass Casino 877-840-0457 John Prine Orpheum Theatre 800-745-3000 Steppin’ Out w/ Ben Vereen Scotts. Ctr. for the Arts 480-499-ARTS Morrissey Orpheum Theatre 800-745-3000 Sting Comerica Theatre 602-379-2888 Atomic Punks Celebrity Theatre 602-267-1600 November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 29


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Blue Man Group Well, what do you say about the Blue Man Group? It’s a trio of blue guys who pantomime in theatrical shows and concerts featuring popular music, comedy and multimedia, acting as strangers in a strange land with themes about technology and information overload. Catch ‘em November 1-6 at ASU Gammage, 1200 S. Forest Ave. in Tempe. For tix go to ASUGammage.com or call 480-965-3434

The Naked Eye Alex DelFlavio is an artist who plans to include sexually explicit photos in a gallery opening. Nan Bemiss, the wife of a Republican senator and gubernatorial candidate and gallery board member appeals for the removal of “offensive” photographs. Unexpectedly, Nan is liberated in the process. Done the way only Nearly Naked Theatre can do it! November 19-December 10 at the Little Theatre at Phoenix Theatre, CENSORED 100 E. McDowell Rd. For tix call 602-254-2151 or visit NearlyNakedTheatre.org

Paula Poundstone Paula Poundstone’s wry observations about everyday life, drinking, kids, American politics and, of course, cats, are priceless. Poundstone returns to the Mesa Arts Center on October 26 for an evening of her own special comedy at the Mesa Arts Center, 1 E. Main St. at Center Street in Mesa. For tix visit MesaArtsCenter.com or call 480-644-6500

NOVEMBER 2011 ION THEATER + STANDUP DATE EVENT LOCATION 1-6 Blue Man Group ASU Gammage 3-6 Russell Peters Stand Up Live 3-6 John Witherspoon Tempe Improv 4-19 Race iTheatre Collaborative 10-20 Proof Mesa Encore Theatre 11-12-18 Mornings at Seven Desert Stages thru 12 Legally Blonde: the Musical B’way Palm Dinner Theatre thru 13 Next Fall Actors Theatre of Phx 17 A Christmas Carol B’way Palm Dinner Theatre 17-12/4 God of Carnage AZ Theatre Co. 18-19 Jon Lovitz Tempe Improv 19-12/10 The Naked Eye Nearly Naked Theatre thru 19 A Chorus Line AZ Broadway Theatre 23-12/18 A Christmas Story Phoenix Theatre 25-26 Capitol Steps Scotts. Ctr. for the Arts 25-12/29 Miracle on 34th St. AZ B’way Theatre 26 Paula Poundstone Mesa Arts Center 26-27 A Christmas Carol SW Shakespeare Co. DECEMBER 2-17 Milk, Milk Lemonade Stray Cat Theatre

PHONE 480-644-6500 480-719-6100 480-921-9877 602-347-1071 480-644-6500 480-483-1664 480-325-6700 602-253-6701 480-325-6700 602-256-6995 480-921-9877 602-254-2151 623-776-8400 602-254-2151 480-994-ARTS 623-776-8400 480-644-6500 480-641-7039 480-820-8022

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by Jackson David Kelly jacksonkelly@cox.net

Yo, DJ! What’s New? Did you hear? Madonna’s headlining

Super Bowl XLVI. Perfect time for a new album, the first under Live Nation to drop don’t you think? But for now, check out new stuff from Susan Boyle, The Decemberists, Nickelback, Justin Bieber (holiday), Kate Bush, Slipknot, Sigor Ros, another Michael Jackson “faux” album and Rihanna, who just smashed Madonna’s record for the female artist with the quickest collection of top 10 hits.

Coldplay

Mylo Xyloto I’m going to say it— Coldplay is the next U2 with this modern band following in their footsteps. Mylo takes a step back with less production, a sense of raw emotion and an almost acoustic feel. Though both lead singles were tepid, the meat in this sandwich is the rest of the album. “Charlie Brown” is this sets standout track with its energetic electric pop feel that is classic Coldplay, while the haunting ballad “Up in Flames” is just plain stunning. The opener “Hurts Like Heaven” also resonates well in its fast pulsating shinning beams of instrumental light. GRADE: A-

Florence and the Machine

Ceremonials

As their second major release, but with so much pressure, it’s part Kate Bush, part Björk and the perfect continuation to “Lungs” but with an increased U.S. appeal. “Heartless” and “Spectrum” are moving, sweeping, haunting and dramatic which

both prove to be epic. The gritty “Shake It Out” also showcase Flo’s strengths. But it’s the “Dog Days” sound of “No Light” and the crashing ballad of “Never Let Me Go” that make this collection nearly perfect. GRADE: A-

Kelly Clarkson Stronger

After making big industry mistakes, Kelly is back in the driver’s seat. Cowriting five of the 17 tracks, she likened the album to a cross of Tina Turner, Prince, Sheryl Crow and Radiohead and the album proves to be the bridge that shoulda been after “Breakaway.” Though lead single “Mr. Know It” is weak, it’s the sizzle of second track “What Doesn’t Kill You,” the assumed third track and cut #3, “Dark Side” as well as “Forgive You” that really shine. It’s power-pop-rockelectrified anthems at her best. GRADE: B

Alexandra Stan Saxobeats

The people behind this release are genius with its timing. Most would take time to perfect the tracks, but let’s be honest here: this is nothing but 15 minutes of fame. Much like Ingrid’s infectious “You Promised Me,” this is a copycat with its dance, polka, Euro NRG sound. Musically it’s high grade cheese that tastes perfect after a glass of wine. Don’t pass on the fun “Lollipop,” the ultimate cheddar of “Get Back” and the ever so fun and polka infused “Ting Ting.” GRADE: C November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 33


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by Kimberly M. Ruff kimberlymruff@yahoo.com

A Beauty and a Beast My Week with Marilyn Starring: Michelle Williams, Emma Watson, Kenneth Branagh, Eddie Redmayne Like J. Edgar Hoover, we all know about the myth and legend of Marilyn Monroe— the girl born Norma Jean Baker who later became the platinum blonde sex symbol. We know about her marriages, affairs and addictions. Even though we can rationally admit she wasn’t that great as an actress, we still giggle when we see her warble, “diamonds are a girl’s best friend.” What we don’t really know is what it was like for the starlet behind the scenes—how lost, confused and utterly tortured she really was. In My Week with Marilyn, directed by Simon Curtis, Michelle Williams (Blue Valentine) plays the Blonde Bombshell during the making of the 1957 film, The Prince and the Showgirl. Based on two books written by Colin Clark (Redmayne), a recent film school graduate and production assistant on the film, it depicts his experience escorting Monroe around England after her husband, playwright Arthur Miller (Dougary Scott), leaves. The film within the film, The Prince and the Showgirl, was directed co-starred Sir Laurence Olivier (Kenneth Branagh), still considered to be one of the greatest actors of all time. Pitted against Monroe, who was at the height of her personal problems, Olivier was annoyed with her off-screen antics and ultimately abandoned directing movies for nearly 13 years. The tension, both on and off the set, factors heavily into the plot of the film, My Week with Marilyn. Release Date: November 23, 2011.

J.Edgar Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Naomi Watts, Armie Hammer, Josh Lucas, Damon Herriman J. Edgar Hoover is one of those people in American history who is revered and reviled in equal measure. He was instrumental in establishing the Federal Bureau of Investigations in 1935 and worked as its director until his death in 1972. He turned it into a large and efficient crimefighting agency, employing stateof-the-art police technology that is still in use today, including a centralized fingerprint database and forensics laboratories. Yet, for all his forwardthinking and innovation, Hoover was also a notoriously paranoid, suspicious man who kept extensive files on presumed enemies—both political and personal. For this reason that the FBI now limits the term of the Director to 10 years. Leonard DiCaprio (Inception, Shutter Island) plays the megalomaniac. Directed by Clint Eastwood (Gran Turino, Million Dollar Baby), the film explores the man behind the myth. A high-profile figure and confirmed bachelor, Hoover was the subject of many rumors himself—many people still believe he was a cross-dresser and there is suspicion that his close friendship with Associate Director, Clyde Tolson, was more than just friendly. These themes are carefully explored in this beautifully crafted biopic. A definite mustsee—particularly for Arizonans who know a thing or two about power-corrupted heads of crime fighting organizations (read: Joe Arpaio). Release Date: November 4, 2011 November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 35


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by Wes Bergman wesobergman@yahoo.com

Memoirs & Allegations Brideshead Revisited: 30th Anniversary Edition Starring: Jeremy Irons, Anthony Andrews, Diana Quick, Laurence Olivier, John Gielgud In 1945, a 42-yearold Evelyn Waugh, best known for writing brilliant satires including Decline and Fall and A Handful of Dust, took a brief leave of absence from the military after a minor parachute accident and penned what is now considered to be his magnum opus, Brideshead Revisited. Told from the perspective of a now middle-aged Army Captain, Charles Ryder (Irons), it recounts his experiences nearly 20-years earlier when he is befriended at Oxford by the utterly charming, fey Sebastian Flyte (Andrews), who is notorious for eccentric associations, a penchant for alcohol and the constant companionship of a teddy bear. Flyte is also the son of the aristocratic Lord Marchmain (Olivier). The friendship blossoms into a close, tender association that brings Ryder, the only child of his widowed father, Edward (Gielgud), into a world of excess and opulence. Waugh’s romantic, poetic tale spans the entirety of Ryder’s friendship with Sebastian and his associations with the equally dysfunctional Marchmains, including Sebastian’s stunning sister, Julia (Quick). Though the exact nature of Charles and Sebastian’s relationship is still a matter of debate, it’s undeniable that the Brideshead’s themes are centered on Roman Catholicism (a taboo religion in England, where the lion’s share of the populace is Anglican), romantic love and an

aching desire for a sense of belonging. The TV mini-series, which first aired in 1981, distilled this groundbreaking epic into eleven beautiful one-hour episodes. Now, a 30th Anniversary edition is available on Blu-ray in a gorgeous DVD box set that includes an episode guide, director’s notes, commentary, outtakes, and interviews with the principle cast. Absolutely gorgeous and a definite mustsee! Available at AcornOnline.com

The Green Starring: Jason Butler Harner, Cheyenne Jackson, Julia Ormond, Illeana Douglas One of the absolute worst accusations you can make against a person is of sexual impropriety with a minor. Even if you’re completely innocent of any wrongdoing, the stigma attached to such an allegation can completely ruin you. This is the center of the brilliant new film, The Green. Written by Paul Macarelli and directed by Steven Williford, The Green stars Jason Butler Harner as Michael Gavin, a drama coach at a private high school, whose life is nearly destroyed by such an accusation. With the student in question on the run and his financially strapped mother and her abusive boyfriend eager to capitalize on the sensationalistic case that rocks their idyllic Connecticut town, Gavin’s career, relationship with longtime partner, Daniel (Jackson, 30 Rock), and innocence are in jeopardy. He must find a way to clear his name, salvage his relationship and come to terms with a secret from his past. Julia Ormond stars as his compassionate lawyer and Illeana Douglas as his closest coworker. Available through Wolfe Video on November 22, 2011. November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 37


FRIGHT NIGHT

CHARLIES PHOENIX

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Shannel & Jessica Wild These talented fan favorites from RuPaul’s Drag Race always spark and spice up a show with their amazing talent and illusion. They’ll be performing at the Karamba for Carnaval Latino’s NakedPapis.com 5th anniversary party hosted by Barbra Seville & Diamond Dallas on Wednesday, November 23. 1724 E. McDowell Rd. 602-254-0231 KarambaNightclub.com

NOVEMBER 2011 ION DRAG LISTINGS DATE

TIME LOCATION SHOW / PERFORMER(S)

Sat 5 10:00pm Sun 6 8:00pm Fri 11 10:00pm Sat 12 9:00pm Sun 13 8:00pm Sun 13 2:00pm Thurs 17 10:30pm Sat 19 10:00pm Sun 20 8:00pm Sun 20 7:00pm Fri 25 8:00pm Fri 25 10:00pm Sun 27 8:00pm Sun 27 8:30 Wed 23 10:00pm Wed 30 10:00pm Mondays 9:30pm Mondays 7:00pm Tuesdays 8:00pm Tuesdays 8:00pm Tuesdays 10:30pm Wednesdays 10:30pm Wednesdays 9:00pm Wednesdays 10:30pm Wednesdays 10:00pm Thursdays 10:30pm Fridays 10:00pm Fridays 10:00pm Fridays 10:30pm Fridays 9:00pm Saturdays 10:30p Saturdays 10:00pm Saturdays 10:00pm Saturdays 9:30pm 1st & 3rd Sundays 12:30pm Sundays 8:00pm Sundays 8:30pm Sundays 10:30pm

Cruisin’ 7th Apollo’s Apollo’s Cruisin’ 7th Apollo’s The Rock Karamba icepics Apollo’s The Rock Charlie’s The Rock Apollo’s icepics Karamba Karamba

Mia Adam’s First Anniversary Show Afeelya’s Joshua Tree Fundraiser Miss Goddess Apollo’s Pageant’ Miss Cruisin’ 7th Pageant Miss Goddess Apollo’s Review Show Rock-A-Hula Luau with Olivia Gardens. Ruby’s Sweet Sixteen Party Chane Jordan’s 1 Year Anniversary and Turnabout Show The Cougar Cabaret The Miss Rock Pageant Pussy LeHoot’s 11th Annual Leftovers Show Lady Christian’s Trailer Trash Revue Barbra Seville’s That Time of the Month MEN OF STRUT Shannell & Jessica Wild Barbra Seville’s Drag Race “Season 2 Premiere”

Apollo’s BS West BS West Cruisin’ 7th Karamba Karamba The Rock Cruisin’ 7th Charlie’s Karamba The Rock Friends Cruisin’ 7th BS West Cruisin’ 7th The Rock icepics Charlie’s Cruisin’ 7th Apollo’s Charlie’s Karamba

Naughty or Nice Drag Bingo with Eryka Knowles & Clayton Bloodbath with Coco St. James and Kira Daniels Stars of Tomorrow with Kendra St. James The Stage is Yours with Mia Inez Adams (sign up by 7:30) Salsa Tuesdays with Savannah Moussier Barbra Seville Open Wide Wednesdays w/ Victoria, Felicia, & Celia Steppin’ Out with TC Claudia B. & Company Tejano Thursdays with Ruby Reynolds Pandemonium feat. the AZ Gender Outlaws Freaky Fridays with Celia Putty Devina’s TGIF Elements 7 Deadly Sins - followed by Mandi BoomBoom Host Mia Inez Adams The Barbra Seville Show The Chane Jordan Show Pussy’s Patio Show Sunday Morning Madness That Time of the Month Show Pussy LeHoot & Friends Diamond’s Show November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 39


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Persian Garden Café One of the biggest criticisms of American

cuisine is that we are so wholly divorced from our food. Compared to the rest of the world, we spend less of our income on food than any other expense (less than 10%), frequently forgo healthier, fresh foods in favor of pre-packaged, or ready-to-eat meals, cooking programs and recipes that promise to feed us quickly. This isn’t true everywhere. Certainly not at the Persian Garden Café. Across the street from Phoenix College, the Persian Garden Café is the brainchild of Chef/Owner, Mahmoud Jaafari, who got his first taste working in restaurants while attending college for biochemistry, and this background—along with his Persian heritage—find their way into every fragrant and flavorful dish. A firm believer in creating a harmonious dietary experience, Jaafari engages in a delicate process that applies principles found in microgastronics and macrobiotics. If you don’t know what this means, Jaafari and his charmingly loquacious son, Joseph, are delighted to discuss these ideas with you, because at the Persian Garden Café, it’s equal parts “eats” and “education.”

dishes and use their downtime (3-5 p.m. Tuesdays-Saturdays) for preparation. Jaafari goes on a month-long sabbatical during the summer to his home in Iran where he buys saffron and other spices that ultimately find their way into his dishes. Be sure to follow up each bite with a sip of Persian Lemonade. Much lighter and less tart than traditional lemonade, this palette cleanser is a subtle lemon juice and rosewater mixture with a warm honey aftertaste. The carrot apple ginger juice is extremely smooth-textured and flavorful, the carrot taste is perfectly balanced by the ginger and muted by the apple. It’s refreshing enough for an Arizona summer, but spicy enough for our chillier fall. While the Persian Garden Café boasts a diverse, culturally-rich menu, it also has clever interpretations on old standards. Their grilled cheese sandwich is no exception; using provolone, onions, tomatoes and fresh herbs, their fresh bread is coated with garlic butter before pan-searing. It’s “beyond grilled cheese” and served with tabouleh salad. My favorite dish was the

Their dishes are incredible; the only challenge is trying to decide what to have because there’s no wrong answer. If you’re in the mood for something light, treat yourself to their Mirza and Gyros, a delicious platter of thinly-sliced, seasoned lamb meat and eggplant croquettes with tomatoes, cucumbers, or their Falafel, a fried ball of ground chickpeas, sesame seeds and tahini sauce. Both are served with homemade yogurt, but that’s not the only thing they make on site: they have a full-sized oven where they bake bread daily, offer seasonal, organic November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 41


(continued)

seasonal Acorn Squash. Jaafari bakes a half-section of an acorn squash, adds braised vegetables and then bakes them together, finishing it off with a touch of parmesan cheese and complementing the dish with three mouth-watering sides: white/brown rice made with cinnamon, lentils and rosewater, white rice topped with saffron and lentil soup. It’s an incredibly simple recipe and yet somehow, Jaafari’s perfect blend of just the right amounts of spices and cooking made me—a life-long Squash Hater—a convert.

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And isn’t that the way dining should be? Not necessarily a religious experience, but definitely one in which “satisfaction” is something you feel throughout and not just when you see how the final bill, and where “sated” isn’t synonymous with that gorged, uncomfortable feeling you get after a particularly heavy meal? I think so and I bet you do, too. 1335 W. Thomas Rd. 602-263-1915. Tuesdays - Fridays with lunch from 11 am-3 pm and dinner served Tuesday Saturday from 5 pm-10 pm persiangardencafe.com


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Gabriele Bertaccini’s Culinary Mischief by Deon Brown photos by Fernando Hernandez 44 www.IONAZ.com November 2011


F

ood should always be a shared experience. As a matter of fact, the American journalist Christopher Morley observed, “No man is lonely eating spaghetti. It requires so much attention.” And if you’re in the kitchen with the handsome, and molto vivace Chef Gabriele Bertaccini you’ll understand why nobody is ever lonely when he sets the table—with or without spaghetti—and always gets plenty of attention from him. With the holiday season upon us, Chef Gabriele presents an entire smorgasbord with ideas about how to entertain and how to be a perfect guest, too. It’s all about a little bit of the notable “culinary mischief” which Gabriele has made uniquely his own. “You have to ask yourself how you’re going to make this time together memorable,” Gabriele tells over a glass of white wine. “We don’t make food; we create memories. We create an atmosphere to foster happiness and relationships. My way of making these moments memorable is by making food, spending time together with friends and talking about life,” he shares. “Food is a way for people to interact, to connect.” Gabriele, 26-years-old, grew up in Florence, Italy, where the Renaissance first blossomed under the frequently iron-fists of the Medici princes. Gabriele learned about cuisine at Instituto Professionale Buontalenti per Servizi Alberghieri. “Cooking has always been a passion of mine. Since I was 13 or 14 I would watch food shows on TV. My mother yelled at me, ‘You’re going to get fat!’ So I went to culinary school for five years. Then I washed dishes,

scrubbing pots and pans. That’s how you start,” Gabriele recalls about the start of his love affair with cuisine and cooking. Poco a poco. “I’m not in the business to become a millionaire, but to create moments for other people. How can you make this time together something to remember? My way is by making food and sharing it with others; and alway with a little mischief and fun, if you will,” Gabriele elaborated. Thanksgiving and the Holidays are right around the corner along with dinners, parties and open houses. When it comes to entertaining, no matter how big or small the occasion, the duties of the host and the obligations of the guests don’t have to be overwhelming. “People like to know that you’re opening your home to them. I don’t care how big a house is—it can be a mansion—but everyone and everything ends up happening in the kitchen,” Gabriele notes. “And once you’re in the kitchen, I’ll put you to work!” Gabriele shares his own “secret” about entertaining. “Always keep your guests in mind. You must have involvement. Make your guests part of the event! If someone asks, ‘Can I help you?’ you must allow that. Let them slice the bread; let them do something to help. Once they’re in the kitchen, put them to work. Nobody’s supposed to feel like they’re in a restaurant, otherwise they’d be in a restaurant,” he believes. November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 45


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Put any Martha Stewart ideas about entertaining away. “It’s not supposed to be perfect; you need to have a little ‘mischief,’ if you will,” he said. “It’s all about socializing and creating memories around the table,” Gabriele believes. “It’s no wonder so many holidays revolve around food. It not only stimulates the tastebuds, it builds atmosphere and friendships. A dinner with friends and sharing plates creates community.” It’s more than that. “It’s not that I have an obsession with food, Gabriele continues, “but rich or poor, food creates commonalities and it builds memories.” Times are tight, and everybody’s careful these days. Gabriele offers a generous philosophy for holiday entertaining, marking a new trend that’s easy to follow. “Simplicity is the new luxury. Especially with the traditional holidays—like Thanksgiving and Christmas—simplicity is the key. Adapt what you have available and create something and share. The best dinners are spontaneous where everything happens with love and passion,” he believes. Tired of turkey or ham? “You don’t have to get stuck doing the same thing over and over. Switch it up! Do something different! Never get stuck in the same routine.” If you’re invited to dinner, remember something you can share with the hosts. Gabriele has his own special spin to it, creating a gift that gives twice.

“Bring a well-thought out, good bottle of wine—it doesn’t have to be expensive, but not something from the grocery store—along with a note. I like to have my guest sign the bottle and I date it, adding the occasion. After the event, I send a note inviting them back to share the wine they brought with me.” Chef Gabriele gives back to the many different organizations in the Valley, and within the GLBT community. His bravura, beautiful smile and generous heart is familiar at fundraisers. At the recent Equality Arizona Gala they auctioned off a six-course Italian dinner for eight with wine pairings for $6,000 prepared by the Chef himself courtesy of his business, Il Tocco. Furthermore, he volunteered to create an identical dinner for the second highest bidder. Dinners from Il Tocco have also been a highly sought after commodity at the 1in10 fundraisers. “You don’t have to write big checks. You have to figure out what you can do to make it happen; I happen to like cooking,” Gabriele explains. Prestissimo! You’re ready for the holidays! Finally, Chef Gabriele tells us the worst thing to have in your kitchen. A microwave oven? No. Instant coffee? No. Another chef!

_

Learn more about Chef Gabriele and how he can create a perfect memory and dining experience for you at IlToccoFood.com. For amazing recipes you can make yourself, check out GabrieleBertaccini.com November 2011 www.IONAZ.com 47


Rainbows FESTIval

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HERITAGE SQUARE


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Photography & Art | Devin Mitchell See more at Devinography.com

jonathan gaudette


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anthony luna



sean mullins


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jackson kelly


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peter culbertson



courtney leavitt


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november 2011

jenco giovani


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OUTRAGEOUS!

AZ Says “Happy SB 1070 Thanksgiving OUTRAGEOUS! for Most!”

PHOENIX— The fallout from Arizona’s drastic anti-illegal immigration measure SB 1070 continues ANY RESEMBLANCE as Thanksgiving approaches.

“Look,” said Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio, “When the Pilgrims came over here it was fair and square. TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL The Indians kept them from starving to death Governor Jan and in turn, we Brewer (R) made a tasty put down her turkey dinner Marlboro Reds for them before long enough we told them to to rasp out to get lost,” Arpaio reporters, “I think recounts. “Spain Thanksgiving took Arizona is one of the from the Indians. most meaningful Not us. Now SB holidays we have 1070 just makes in America. It’s all things fair for ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL about how foreigners from another intolerant everybody. Well, for American Americans, land who were persecuted and denied basic anyway.” human rights came to this country and made a better life for themselves at other’s expense. Any illegal aliens without documentation And we aim to keep it that way,” in a recent caught having turkey dinner will not be statement to the press. allowed to have any pumpkin pie and risk arrest. Mexicans can have tamales and The draconian SB 1070 signed into law in enchiladas and Canadians can have beer, but a April 2010 and critics accuse it of allowing strict “No Americano? No El Turkey Dinner-o” racial profiling residents the law suspects of policy will be enforced,” said officials. not having proper documentation.

OUTRAGEOUS!

OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS!

OUTRAGEOUS!

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OUTRAGEOUS!

Postage Stamps vs. OUTRAGEOUS! Smoke Signals

OUTRAGEOUS!

WASHINGTON, Postmaster, Benjamin D.C. — The U.S. Franklin, invented Postal Service them. Or the Indians. announced that I’m not sure.” first class stamps ANY TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL costRESEMBLANCE will rise from Currently an intricate 44 to 45 cents in network of Smoke January, 2012 in an Signal stations attempt to generate are be constructed revenue for the nationwide. Large hemorrhaging fires with a generous institution. Faxes, supply of wood and email and text blankets to operate messaging are the signals will be crippling the aging billowing at U.S. communication post offices as well method more every year, which may soon as casinos on American Indian reservations go the way of the Pony Express and the across the nation. telegram. ANY TRUTH IS IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL ANYRESEMBLANCE RESEMBLANCETO TOTHE THE TRUTH TRAGICALLY “It’s great for communicatingACCIDENTAL important Now the USPS is introducing another messages, like ‘Men with thundersticks way to get your message to someone when behind next rock,’ or ‘Coyote has Dynamite’ you need for a reasonable fee: the smoke or ‘Win big! Prime Rib Dinner, $4.99!’” signal. “We’re expecting lots of smoke signals to “It’s been around for hundreds of years,” be sent this holiday season,” said one postal said one assistant to the Postmaster employee. “Send your smoke signals early General. “It’s in lots of old John Wayne for guaranteed delivery.” westerns and a bunch of Bugs Bunny cartoons, too. I think the first U.S.

OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS!

OUTRAGEOUS!

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL


DJ SIN MORERA

AMSTERDAM DOWNTOWN PHOENIX

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OUTRAGEOUS!

New Series “Glum” to Premiere

OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS!

HOLLYWOOD - Runaway hit TV series “Glee” from the frequently awful FOX Broadcasting Company delights largely White, middleclass and frequently ANY GayRESEMBLANCE misfit audiences who like Madonna across America with their heartwarming series about a group of largely White, middleclass, frequently Gay misfit high school students who like Madonna and solve their problems and find unity by singing lots of show tunes in between worrying about sex and actually having sex.

“It’s really pretty incredible,” said an anonymous production assistant. “Who doesn’t want to relive those heartwarming TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLYexperiences ACCIDENTAL at high school that never really happened? ‘Glum’ takes it once step further! Instead of long, pointless, musical numbers set to a medley of Madonna songs, just think of watching two dorks duke it out with a Dark-Square Bishop and Hanging Pawns in complete silence? Now that’s ANY TOTO THE TRUTH IS IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL ANYRESEMBLANCE RESEMBLANCE THE TRUTH TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL entertainment!” Now some other crappy network, probably Additionally, there is no sex. the CW or UPN, wants to cash on Glee’s recipe for success by creating a copycat show. Each episode of “Glum” will last up to three hours, or at least until there’s a Check Mate or “Glum” showcases the talents of a group of maybe a Zwischenzug in the season finale. largely White, middle-class, and frequently Gay misfit high school students who don’t “We’re currently casting for Russian kids, like Madonna and want to start a Chess Club, because they’re supposed to be really good at much to the dismay of a cutthroat Glee Club chess and they don’t have any Russian kids on sponsor. ‘Glee,’ said an agent.

OUTRAGEOUS! OUTRAGEOUS!

OUTRAGEOUS!

ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE TRUTH IS TRAGICALLY ACCIDENTAL


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IONPHOENIX 1.

Alpha Boys Cabaret

1702 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix

2.

Amsterdam

718 N. Central Ave. - Downtown PHX (602) 258-6122

3.

2303 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 956-2885

4.

Anvil Apollo’s

5749 N. 7th St. - Phoenix

(602) 277-9373

5.

Bar 1

3702 N. 16th St. - Phoenix

(602) 266-9001

6.

Bliss / Rebar

901 N. 4th St. - Phoenix

(602) 795-1792

7.

BS West

7125 E. 5th Ave. - Scottsdale

(480) 945-9028

8.

Bunkhouse

4428 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix

(602) 200-9154

9.

Cash Inn

2140 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 244-9943

10. Charlie’s

727 W. Camelback Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 265-0224

11. Club Sutra

2424 E. Thomas Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 682-5088

12. Cruisin’ 7th 13. Dick’s Cabaret

3702 N. 7th St. - Phoenix

(602) 212-9888

3432 E. Illini Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 274-DICK

14. FLEX Men’s Club

1517 S Black Canyon Hwy - Phoenix

(602) 271-9011

15. Friends

1028 E. Indian School Rd. - Phoenix (602) 277-7729

16. icepics videobar

3108 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 267-8707

17. Karamba

1724 E. McDowell Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 254-0231

18. Kobalt

3110 N. Central Ave. - Phoenix

(602) 264-5307

19. Lush Lounge

2050 N. Alma School - Chandler

(480) 857-9444

20. OZ

1804 W. Bethany Home Rd. - Phoenix (602) 242-5114

21. Plazma

1560 E. Osborn Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 266-0477

22. Rainbow Cactus

15615 N. Cave Creek Rd. - Phoenix

(602) 971-1086

23. The Rock 24. Roscoe’s

4129 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix

(602) 248-8559

4531 N. 7th St. - Phoenix

(602) 285-0833

25. Nu Towne

Coming Soon!

26. Z Girl Club

4301 N. 7th Ave. - Phoenix

Recommended

(480) 374-3222

(602) 265-3233

September 2011 www.IONAZ.com 75


IONBAR GUIDE PHOENIX

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

NEW! Alpha Boys

Dollar Dances Specials all night

Dollar Dances Specials all night

2-4-1 VIP Dances

Amsterdam

Signature Night

One Woman Show Kiki Vermont $3 Smirnoff Cocktails

Karaoke 1/2 OFF for Arts & Industry

Apollo’s

2-4-1 well & dom. 4pm-Close

$5 red cup/50¢ refills 10a-10p Karaoke 9pm

$5 red cup/50¢ refills 10a-10p Male Strippers 10:30pm

Bar 1

Friday Happy Hour 4-7p 10a-4p $2 well/ bud draft

Saturday $2 dom bottle 6-9p 10a-4p $2 well/ bud draft

$2 Brown Bagged Beer 10a-4p $2 well/ bud draft

Happier Hour 3-6:30p 2-4-1well $5 martinis-$3 all beer & h wine

Brunch 10am-2pm $4 Bloody $3 glass or $10 mimosas pitch

Sunday Chill 2-7pm 2-4-1 alcohol / $10 bucket beer

BS West

The Elements Show 10pm Dance Party $5 u-call-it Drinks

2-4-1 everything all night Go-go Boyz / Extended Patio

FUN Raiser 7pm Karaoke 9:30pm $2 Draft / $3 Marys & Screws

Charlie’s

$3 pitchers/2-4-1 well/dom 2-7p $1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours

$3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 12-7p $1 Happy Hour 7-9p/Afterhours

Volleyball 4-7pm, NEW 3-4-1 $3 Long Islands, $3 pitchers

Cruisn’ 7th

TGIF - Devina 10:30 pm

AZ Leathermen Strippers 4:3 New Show Hostess Mia Adams

Morning Madness 1st & 3rd Sun $3 Svedka cocktails 7p-close

Dick’s Cabaret

2-4-1 VIP Dances 7pm ‘til 9pm

Off the Hook Tons of Prizes & Giveaways

2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances & VIP Wristbands

$3 Pomegranate Presses Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p

$3 Bottle Beer & Tequila Shot Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p

$3 Brunch Drinks 50% off bottles of wine

R Bliss / ReBAR

R FEZ

Sunday Brunch $10 10am-2pm

Friends

FREE Hot Appetizer Bufet 5-8pm

icepics

MEAT - Hot Go Go Dancers $2.50 dom / $3 well / $4 Lg Isl.

The Chane Jordan Show! $4 SKYY cocktails 10pm

Show Tunes Sundays 2pm-8pm 2-4-1 drinks

Karamba

Vaquero Fridays 9pm-11pm Reverse Happy Hour $2 drinks

Top 40 Saturdays 9pm-11pm Reverse Happy Hour $2 drinks

Top 40 Sundays Diamond Show $3 Pitcher Beer Bust

Roscoe’s 10:00p- 1:00a

Cruisin’ 7th | Plazma 4:30p - 7:00p | 10:30p - 1:30p

The Leathermen

Apollo’s 4:00p- 6:00p

R Maizie’s

Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday

Happy Hour Brunch 9a-2p 3-6pm Everyday

Brunch All Day Closes at 4pm

R Mi Patio

Fridays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Saturdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Sundays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm- Open 2-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm-Open 11-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm-Open 11-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

R Roscoe’s*

The Leathermen! Great Happy Hour

Happy Hour 10am-7pm Free Darts All afternoon

Make your Bloody Mary Bar $8 Lg Isnd Pitch. $3 Beer Pitch.

R Switch

Fri: $3 House Margaritas Open from 11am-Midnight

Sat: $3 House Cosmo Martini Open from 10am-Midnight

$3 Sweet Tea Vodka Lemonade $3 Breakfast Carafes Open @ 10

R Ticoz

Fridays 1/2 off Coronas all day Happy Hour 3-6:30pm

Saturday 1/2 off well vodka Brunch 10a-3p - HH 3-6:30p

Sundays 1/2 off Sangria Pitch Brunch 10a-3p - HH 3-6:30

The Rock

R

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FULL MENU

* LIMITED MENU/TIMES

www.IONAZ.com September 2011

FREE PROJECT HARD HAT CONDOMS


MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

Closed Mondays

Closed Tuesdays

Amateur Show 9pm

2-4-1 VIP Dances

Martini Mondays $5 Martinis

Vintage Vinyl Tuesdays Retro Afeelya Bunz 1/2 Price Drinks

$1 Beer Wednesdays $1 Domestic Beer

Show Night: Kik Vermont $3 Smirnoff & $3 All Beers

Drag Bingo 9:30 2 for 1 u-call-it all day/night

Live Cabaret Show 8 pm $2 off any martini

Big Gay Game Challenge 7:30 Happy Hour All day / All night

Karaoke 9:30pm

Monday $5 Martinis

KAROKE $2.50 wel, dom 10a-4p $2 well/ bud draft

$1 OFF in your undies/leather 10a-4p $2 well/ bud draft

Thursday 2-4-1 U Call It 10a- cl 10a-4p $2 well/ bud draft

Student Salvation Mondays $20 Plate of apps + bottle wine

Twofer Tuesdays $20 2 burgers/fries/2 dom beer

2-4-1 Wednesdays 9pm-close 2-4-1 on ALL drinks

Thirstday Thursdays $4 AMF, Lng Islnd/ Skinny drink

Anything Goes Mondays 9pm $1 Draft / $3 Well / $4 Bomber

Stars of Tomorrow Show $1 Off Beer/$2 Off Call/$5 Well

2-4-1 All Day and All Night A valley tradion!

Amateur Strip Night w/ Mandi $1 Shots / $2 Draft / $3 Well

Underwear Party 8-cl 2-4-1 2-8pm $3 pitch. 2-4-1 well/dom

2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 8p-Close 2-4-1 cocktails/dom

2-8p $3 pitch./2-4-1 well/dom 8p-close $3 Smirnoff

2-4-1 All Day! Cocktails and beer

Karaoke 9pm

Steppin’ Out TC Taylor hosts 10:30 pm - $2 domestic

AZ Leathermen Strippers 10:30 pm

2-4-1 Cover Charge, Dances, VIP Wristbands

Amateur Night Starts at 10pm

Wacky Wednesdays $5 Cover and almost everything else

Stripper Karaoke

$3 Burgers $ Margaritas Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p

‘tini Tuesdays $3 Martinis Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p

$20 Any Bottle of Wine Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p

$3 G Spots Happy Hour Everyday 4-6:30 p

Martini Club $5 Pinnacle Marti. Get your Club Card, 10th is 25¢

2-4-1 Thursday Well & Domestic Plus different top shelf selections

Monday Night Karaoke 9p-1a $4 Pinnacle Cocktails 9p-close FREE Poker Tournament 7pm and 10pm

GLEE starting at 7pm 2-4-1 drinks during the show

Karaoke starting at 9pm $3 well/$2.50 dom./$4 martinis

2-4-1 in undies beer/well 9p-cl $3 Three Olives Thursdays

Karaoke Mondays DJ Ramon $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust

Salsa Tuesday Savannah Show $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust

Top 40 Wed. Barbra Seville $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust

TEJANO Ruby Show $2 drinks & $3 Pitch. Beer Bust

The Leathermen appear at Apollo’s Roscoe’s, Cruisin’ 7th and Plazma!

Cruisin’ 7th 10:30p - 12:30p

$4 Bistro Burgers 4-10pm $10 off of all Bottled Wines

Pizza/Wine Special Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday

BBQ Short Ribs Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday

$3 Mexican Beers Happy Hour 3-6pm Everyday

Mondays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Tuesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Wednesdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Thursdays $1.25 Margaritas on the rocks

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm- Open 2-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm- Open 2-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm- Open 2-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

Happy Hour ‘til 8pm- Open 2-2 $4.50 Stoli drinks ALL DAY!

Monday Pool Tournament 2-4-1 beer & well 7pm-close

2 for Tuesdays 2-4-1 drinks all day

Wednesday All Day Happy Hour

Thursdays 2-4-1 7pm

Mon: $3 House Chard and Cab Open from 11am-Midnight

Tue: $3 Drunken Italian Sodas Open from 11am-Midnight

Wed: $3 Sangrias Open from 11am-Midnight

Thur: $3 Caipirinhas Open from 11am-Midnight

Mondays 1/2 off Mojitos HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid

Tuesdays 1/2 off Sangrias HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid

Wednesdays 1/2 off Margaritas HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid

Thursdays 1/2 off draft beer HH 3-6:30pm - Open 11am-Mid

ION ARIZONA

September 2011 www.IONAZ.com 77



by Addison DeWitt

T

he Holiday Season is here! And it’s never to early to start think about shopping for that special someone. Be careful what you give ‘em! Syphilis is back! Yep. Venereal Disease: the gift that keeps on giving. And that’s when Love means always having to say you’re sorry! So when you’re out “shopping,” make sure you don’t get a little “free gift with purchase,” kiddos. Justice is blind. So is this little item: I hear one of our beloved and venerable Lions of the Community had a lovely little chat late one night with our city’s brave boys in blue after he safely and responsibly exited one of our local watering holes. Boy, did they pull over the wrong person! Seems after the cops left with their tail between their legs that one of our very own “Don’t Fuck with Me, Fellas” Fella called in a few markers with the Big Guns at City Hall and because of his influence we just may see if the Fuzz really is targeting establishments that used to be called “Gay Bars” before Straight people co-opted them and sucked all the fun out of ‘em. But that doesn’t mean you can get away with drinking and driving, kids. Please call a designated Mad Mother and get home safely. Hellooo ... Twinkerballs? Please tell James Quinn that 1996 called and wants its Antique “Current” Events Halloween costume back. JonBenét Ramsey? Honey, I think it’s time to install the Halloween 5.0 app on your rotary phone. Casey Anthony Winehouse—now that’s funny. Now I’m seriously thinking of revoking your “Party Penguin of the Month” status for this. Not only that, but because you were really, super-bratty to me, too, girlie. You’ll never win “Little Miss Perfect” acting like that,

sweetie. Or were you just “in character?” How I want to spank your little bare bottom and make it all red! Not in the fun way, either. With that being said, I’m quite thankful this Thanksgiving season to say that the Party Penguin of the Month is the g-g-g-gorgeous Joel Anderson who masqueraded as the Good Book’s “Adam” for Halloween. Every boy in town was/is willing to be his “(St)Eve.” The good Lord knows that I wouldn’t mind nibbling on Joel’s tasty green fig leaf (pictured) just to get to his meat & potatoes (sadly, not pictured.) Joel makes me in the jaws. I mean, knees. Given have the chance I’d certainly commit an Original Sin. Or two. Or more. Enough sins to keep me in a Confessional for a month. With a cute priest. That shouldn’t be hard to find. Thanksgiving is right around the corner, Joel, so please just save the “Wish”-bone for me. Pretty please? And you don’t know how long I’ve been wishing for the bone, baby! _ There’s nothing Addison loves more than a good “stuffing!” And we don’t mean Stouffer’s, either. Send your gossip giblets to him at RumorHound@aol.com

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Aries Mar. 21 - Apr. 20

Sometimes you feel like a nut. Sometimes you don’t. You’ll discover a treasure you squirreled away last year and its true value will only be known to you. Still, be very suspicious of a Capricorn who covets it.

Taurus Apr. 21 - May 20

There is no exact recipe for Life this month. Add a dash of Conviction and a sprinkle of Truth and you’ll have a meal fit for a King. Or Queen. Invite a Scorpio and you’ll be surprised with “dessert.” Wink, wink!

Gemini May 21 - June 21

This month is like one big potluck! Sample a little here, and a little there. Don’t forget to contribute something, too. Everyone brings something to the table, but an Aries brings a regrettable Jell-O Salad. What else is new?

Cancer June 22 - July 22

You’ll provide the “secret ingredient” to every event you go to starting now through the end of the year. Everyone wants to know, “What is it?” It’s your own exotic spice that leaves them craving more. Especially the Capricorns.

Leo July 23 - Aug. 22

Fork on the left, spoon on the right, knife in the back, dish, dish, dish! Watch out for dinners loaded with conversational landmines this month. Keep it witty! Keep it light! Keep it Gay. Sit next to an Aquarian for laughs.

Virgo Aug. 23 - Sep. 22

Someone’s dreaming up an intimate dinner by candlelight for two, so be sure you don’t drag any skeletons out of your closet along with you. If you’re dining with a Gemini they will always have a schizo twin with them, anyway.

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September 2011

Libra Sep. 23 - Oct. 22

Kiss the cook! A little poontang in the pantry adds a little zest to every dinner. Trap a Leo, play “Lion Tamer” (throw ‘em the meat!) and— voilà!—dinner is served! That’s just the main dish, you carnivore, you!

Scorpio Oct. 23 - Nov.23

You’re the appetizer for a hungry Taurus early this month. If it’s your birthday you’ll discover that a succulent Gemini tastes great, but the price tag is more than you can afford. The Virgo is a Value Meal for you.

Sagittarius Nov. 23 - Dec. 23

You’re just “finger lickin’ good” early in the month. Make sure you don’t spoil after that. Gotta birthday, Saggie? Check out the Early Bird Special because you won’t be able to resist what’s on the menu. Hint: a Gemini tastes just like chicken!

Capricorn Dec. 23 - Jan. 20

Look around! You’re surrounded by fruits, nuts and vegetables these days. Make the best of it! A lovely casserole, or ratatouille will have a Pisces, Virgo and Aries eating out of your hand.

Aquarius Jan. 21 - Feb. 19

Greedy! You always go for dessert first! This month is no different than the rest. Your espiritual sweet tooth gets the best of you in Life and Love. It’s part of your charm. Sample bon-bons from a Pisces.

Pisces Feb. 20 - Mar. 20

This month is one great, big smörgåsbord for you. Try a little of this, and a little of that. Not too much of those. You’ll find yourself going back for seconds when a savory dish tempts you around the 15th in the form of a VIrgo.


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