Metra Issue 970 - OCT 2023

NO ONE WILL BE DENIED SERVICE DUE TO INABILITY TO PAY. Bring

if covered. OCHD participates in the

for Children Program.

National Advertising: Rivendell Media 212-242-6863

Social Media: Bright Torch Media

Distributors: Eddie Desormeau Peter Rene Wade Mercury UPS

I’m Sorry, Say - What?

Questionable Advice for the Every Day Queer.

Welcome, fabulous readers, to our exclusive Bad Advice section where we embrace the absurd and deliver advice so hilariously misguided, you won’t know whether to laugh or facepalm. Remember, this is all in good fun - so please don’t actually take any of this seriously! Here we go:

1. Coming Out Tips: Strut Out of the Closet Coming out is a big deal. Everyone needs to do it on their own time and their own terms. Why not a big show stopping performance to really drive home the fact, that you do in face: taste the rainbow? Schedule something on an important family gathering (maybe Easter, Super Bowl, Cousin Shane’s Bar Mitzvah or a unexpected funeral - all perfect options).Burst into the room with your favorite queer anthem (‘Single Ladies,’ ‘Padam Padam,” “I’m Coming Out.” A few of our favorites) playing in the background. Make sure you’re dressed to impress (feather boa, harness, puppy mask, whatever makes you feel powerful). Make sure your choreo is on point (think back to Britney Spear’s I’m a Slave For You or Troy Sivan’s Rush). If you can enlist some younger cousin’s/ sibling’s for being background dancers.

At the end of your show stopping slayworthy performance, pass out survey’s to your family audience. They can answer the survey prior to

their departure. It should also include a QR code for an amazon wish list or cash app/ venmo to help fund your queerness. Afterall your subscribers would’ve been happy to like, suscribe and tip that performance. So, your family should do the deed just as hard!

2. Meeting New People: How About The Gym?

If you’re looking for a new boo, the gym may serve as a great potential meeting place. With that in mind, you want to show off them cookies and make sure potential suitors know that you’re a prowling kitty in heat. Eye Contact is important. Many of us have heard of the 4 minute stare (this helps to solidify men being interested in other men). That needs to be turned up higher! Give em’ the 24 minute stare. You can watch an entire sitcom OR you can watch me seduce you with my eyes while we’re breaking a sweat.

Wardrobe is another way you can let people know you’re interested. A 3 inch inseam short short, a jock strap that keeps popping out to say “good-day,” or a top that’s a bit too tight, making them mommy milkers look like they need some support. If all this doesn’t seem to work, make sure you follow them into the bathroom and pay them lots of specific compliments. Good luck and we hope that these tips help you find the love of your life!

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Around Town

Bars,

Camp Grounds

One of the things living with a House In Virginia has shown me is how a simple, albeit, truthful, comment can make one feel badly.

“You’re so lucky you are alive today and not in the ‘80s.” I hear it a lot. From family, friends, even doctors and medical professionals. It’s true. Today, living with HIV is not a death sentence. If anything, it can motivate people to see their doctor more and live healthier lifestyles.

But when I hear “you’re lucky that…” I feel a sense of sadness at times, mostly from survivor’s guilt. Why did so many thousands of people before me have to die for me to be

able to live? The medications that are around today only exist because someone had to be the guinea pig, for a lack of better words. Often, I’ll think about those who had to suffer and die for me to be able to live, and it puts a pit in my stomach.

The thing that gets me through it when I’m feeling that way is just remembering that even though so many had to perish in order for us to have the breakthroughs that we have today, I’m sure that they would be content knowing that their death wasn’t in vain. They lived and died, so that I may live. And for that, it’s important to not take our lives for granted. It’s only a House In Virginia.

PROMOTING COMMUNITY AND PHILANTHROPY THROUGH LGBTQ+ SPORTS LEAGUES

Details about Billiards, Bowling and more sports coming soon!

Real Estate Talk with Realtor Kory

Hey Cuties!

Looking to move into a new place to call home by the end of 2023, but you fear the current Interest Rates? As we wind down the year there is NO time to waste. The home buying process can take upwards to 3 - 6 months depending on the market. Spooky Season 2023 has arrived, and New Years is just around the corner so listen up.

You might think putting a hold on shopping for a home until Interest Rates lower is the right move, but here is what I believe will happen to the market in the future. Once we see Interest Rates fall back down to 5%, there will be a surplus of buyers rushing into the market which will immediately cause the Market Value of homes to skyrocket again like we saw in the past couple of years. Sure, you will have a higher interest rate now, but the market value of your newly bought home will increase significantly at that time.

This strategy could give you very nice equity on your newly bought home in just a few years, not to mention if you wait for a lower Interest Rate you will be potentially trapped in bidding wars and higher price points due to increase in demand of the market. If you are willing, ready, and able to buy a home currently, give me a call and I can get you started today on your home buying process and most likely moved in by the end of 2023.

Check out my TikTok for more Real Estate tips, @realtorkory or contact me today for all your real estate needs! Email, DM, Text, or Call because I do it all!

-Kory Lambarth

How long have you been with Affirmations? I have been at Affirmations since the end of August. I’m the baby of the staff!

What is Affirmations to you? A space for my community and myself to feel safe and comfortable in a world where that is not always a guarantee. It is a privilege to be somewhere where I can exist as my entire self, as a Black, Queer femme.

When you’re not working, what do you do for fun? I love spending my time deejaying around the Metro Detroit area and spending time with my friends, my partner, and our kitty.

What's your favorite art movement? I am drawn to the Abstract Expressionism movement. I relate a lot to the idea of balance between intentionality and spontaneity. One of my favorite pieces that I got to see in person recently is Number 1, 1950 (Lavender Mist) by Jackson Pollock!

What’s something you want everyone to know about Affirmations? Affirmations offers a plethora of opportunities for the community, from services across the spectrum of health, to support groups, and resources that make it a bit easier to exist in the world. Whether you need these services, or want to support the center by donating, it helps our community greatly for you to get involved!

Diamond Lampkin-Dockery, Marketing & Communications Associate

SATURDAY'S: BOYZ NIGHT OUT

UNDERWEAR CONTEST

Men don’t cry... why not?

Growing up, I was raised to hide my emotions. Men don’t cry or talk about what they are feeling, I was taught. Men are supposed to be stoic; we are supposed to be protectors. We cannot and should not express our feelings verbally.

My parents were born in the 1940s, and this societal expectation remains. We react in ways we think we should, not in ways that make us feel good. We are supposed to behave in a certain way. We are supposed to feel masculine, and crying is not masculine, society tells us. Talking about our feelings forces us to think about our feelings, and men don’t want to do that and do not know how to do that. It makes us uncomfortable. Instead, we bottle up our emotions.

These generational norms are a major obstacle that is following us through life and through our relationships. They can have serious consequences and lead to physical and mental health problems.

In addition, men don’t have the same support network as women; if a man cries in front of another man, he probably will get laughed at or told to “suck it up.” His emotional outburst is unacceptable. Men are not comfortable discussing how they feel, and they especially do not want to be judged by their peers. They’ve been groomed to feel it is a sign of weakness and insecurity.

Instead, men may express emotions through shooting characters in video games or going to the gym and lifting heavy weights. Emotions are released physically.

Some say that one of the 10 commandments of masculinity is “thou shall not feel.”

Emotional regulation is a term that must be added to everyone’s vocabulary starting now.

Emotional regulation is the ability to exert control

tions and verbalize them correctly.

When we do not have emotional regulation skills, we often rely on unhealthy strategies that may make us feel good in the short-term, but worse in the long-term.

How do we begin building emotional regulation skills, especially when society still thinks it is taboo for men to express their feelings?

Here is a start:

• Begin practicing self-awareness. We can’t express our emotions if we are not aware of them.

• Begin practicing emotional acceptance. It is okay to verbalize our emotions without judging ourselves or worrying about being judged.

• Begin building our emotional vocabulary. For kids, they hit each other and throw things. Instead, we should be teaching them to say the words they are feeling. Verbalizing alleviates frustration and anger. Start equipping kids with the verbal tools in their toolbelt for coping.

Emotional regulation is an effective tool we all should add to our toolbelts. It will help us lead a stress-free life, feel good about ourselves, reduce depression and anxiety, and improve our overall mental health.

Remember, the demands of rigid masculinity make it difficult for men to express their needs and this can hamper relationships. Men deserve to have their emotions validated without their masculinity being questioned.

Building emotional regulation strategies can be learned at any point in our life. It is time for men to deconstruct their limiting self-expression and empower themselves to experience their emotions.

Joe Kort, Ph.D., LMSW

Winter Boondocking Events

Did you know that we still operate in the winter? We have monthly events during the cooler months until it’s ready for next camping season.

Upcoming Upcoming events: events: the Place For Everyone

Hook-up from hell Hook-up from hell Hook-up from hell

You’re in for a doozy, today! A fun story about little old me and a handsome gentleman caller. We usually met up on Tuesdays at 7 pm, at this crappy motel. I told him the last time that I couldn’t go back there, it was just such a long ass drive. Did I mention that I haven’t been able to convince this guy to meet me anywhere else but this motel?

Anyways - the motel was the safe spot for long enough and I was ready for something more exciting. I recommended we go to this place that has hot-tubs and saunas. I enjoy being adventurous, so I figured this may be fun. It had its own little recluse of an area. It was pretty cute.

We got in the shower to rinse before getting into the hot-tub. It felt so relaxing, it had an outdoor shower. We started fooling around in the shower, moved our way to the hot tub and started soak. I slowly got in the hot tub, enjoying the tingling feeling that goes on as you climb in. When all of a sudden, I hear a loud thud! Mr Sexy has tumbled

onto the floor and has completely passed out! Luckily, I was a lifeguard back when I was in high school, so I sprang into action! Feeling my Baywatch fantasy, screaming “You’re going to make it!” I was giving him CPR, bringing him back to life, when all of a sudden I look down at his nether region to see that I’ve woken something else up! While passed out (and now sorta breathing), this crazy has pitched a tent and is staring at me full mass. I’m thinking this has to be the nuttiest real life porn I’ve ever seen.

He slowly starts to sit up and wake up. I grab a towel and try to help wipe him up when he asks, “Is that lavender?” I said I didn’t know and he then explains he has a pretty bad allergy to any and everything lavender. To the point where his body just shuts down. Realizing that the laundry detergent had lavender scent is what made him have his fainting reaction. Good to know for future adventures to find out allergies and how establishments sanitize things.

Wednesday's:

Trivia | Starts at 7 PM.

(Every week)

Friday's:"Name

Tune" between 8pm and 10pm (Every week)

Saturday's:

karaoke | starts at 10 PM (Every week)

Sunday's:pool tournament starts at 4 pm (Every week)

5534 Secor Rd, Toledo OH (across from Brondes Ford)

LARGE BAR & OUTDOOR PATIO AREA

ARIES: Sweetest Day is being served some Hard Cock Block Realness! If you can’t twerk or have that special something that makes everyone’s brown eye pucker, then share them inches with others. The more you share remember to get tested. Remember no one wants your crotch crickets or something that is an Unfuckable Snack.

TAURUS: Time to reflect with Friends with Benefits. Remember the Nostalgic Booty calls from April. Learn from Mistakes, Trial & Error. Not every guy likes to be finger banged. The Spectrum of your Rectum will show you the right shade, who likes what, and everything tasty in between. Forget what you learned about each trick, and you get no treat.

GEMINI: This year you been on this cock roller coaster taking it easy, then taking or all Ruff n Tuff! If you have never experienced Master & Slave or Pup Play, give it a try! Become a Man Pup and see a whole new line of hot ass men you been missing! Become the master of you or someone else. Just don’t catch Narcissistic Fleas.

CANCER: There is all sorts of cock out there. If you’re a top, then you are in luck. Tis the Season to be Sleazing! What is Normal for the Twink could be chaos to the Alpha Daddy. By being more of the brown noser but no Dirty Sanchez, you will keep the Scat in order. Dressed to win this month is the attitude you need to keep going. Blowjobs or Butt Stuff is nice, but you seem preoccupied with some other cock that is fresh meat and near Coming Out Day.

LEO: You might need to help someone out by

hooking them up, I know that sounds Cliché or even Gay! Note these Good Dirty Deeds will not be overlooked. You have Future Clandestine Booy Calls in the mist! Later Your Mysterious Dark & Handsome or that Shlong in A Thong will make his appearance and surface. You just make sure you are genuine, or people will know you’re faking it.

VIRGO: By Being the responsible one while you party with your people, you end up with the perfect balance of Dick Picks or choose your Hot Little Bar Fly. This one might be that one that precums like crazy, like water! It is like someone spilled a fucken drink! Use those Napkins you collected to sop up the mess. If you must, bring a change of clothes or even a towel! Stay Dry out there & listen to “Like Whiskey” to get the meaning!

LIBRA: Sometimes 15 minutes in a dark room or a glory hole is all you need. Revaluating everyone on your Only Fans and Private Feeds are now in tip top order. Cocks might get salty on you. It happens a lot this time of year with everyone not washing their hands & Giving Betches Bumkins until they Blow their O-Rings! Dress to empress and you will make it at the end of the month.

SCORPIO: This is a good time to check your body for warts, moles, an unwanted DILF that turned into Troll, or that Tweeker that now upgraded into a Beefcake! You still got that body, juicy ass and thick cock that he will be craving. Work the Holiday Magic to cover up things or create a beauty mark. Scars can be Sexy or Manly & they show that you Survived! Have the Moments by the balls and hold on tight and do not let go until you see progress.

SAGITTARIUS: Welcome to penises problems with the Girthy and Stuby. Pick and choose your downfall, everyone has one. The diversity of the Random Grindr hookup meets the irony of someone that does not match their profile picture and its never current pictures! The time to act is now! Upgrade aps so you can talk to even more guys in your area. It is all about lowering standards vs getting laid.

CAPRICORN: That work fuck buddy might be what is needed to take your mind off things at work. Unleashing that Monster, you got might be what shows interest to someone you seen and like to taste. That Hot Five Minutes in the Coat Closet might make you come out or even cum out. Make sure you’re alone. You do not want to be on Camera or have a set of eyes that you did expect and get fired.

AQUARIUS: Spend time in familiar places or be caught up in some Stranger Danger. Be around people who do more than just lift your legs. Putting that musk on your ankles seems to be working for some of the bottoms. If you party at the end of the month with a new crew It will end up being a big ole cock block. Trust both of your heads to make sure you have a well-balanced night.

PISCES: That guy that has been ghosting you needs to go. Keeping a number and getting no replies is a waste of time. Everyone is wearing their masks and it’s not just on Halloween, The Shade is so thick like an Italian Cock. They usually serve 8 inches and beyond for years. Not all the gays are in Skimpy Bar Outfits, some are having house parties, some are that Guncle taking their family out trick or treating. Use your time wisely.

SCAN & SHOP

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