Front image: Aly N’Diaye For FourTwoNine Magazine By David Roemer Created on my phone with Photoshop app.
Me
What does identity mean to you? For me, identity is who a person is. Their qualities and beliefs. It’s what makes a person. It’s unique to that individual. It’s selfness and oneness. Having said that, identity is a social constraint. It forces people to conform to a society obsessed with labeling by way of control. It collectively forces individuals with shared qualities, beliefs, ideas, passions, etc to be categorised. Assimilating the individual's identity for a collective one. How would you describe your identity? This is such an interesting question. As I've previously mentioned about not giving any real thought about my own relationship with identity, baring one time where I addressed my sexuallity. I’ve never been one for label’s and have explicitly stated that my sexuallity does not define who I am as a person, but is merely an aspect of me. (A freedom myself and many others can enjoy, due to the sheer strength and determination of the collective queer identity who fought tirelessly for such a right) But one aspect of my life I had never considered in terms of identity, was my own mental health and my struggles with anxiety, panic disorder and depression. I allow myself to be labeled within this regards. And allow it to form part of my identity. But why do i this with an “illness”, but not with regards to my sexuality? Possibly due to my own internalized view on homosexuality (internalized homophobia, affecting the vast majority of the LGBT+ communiity) owing to the period of time i grew up in. The 90’s, queer culture was just starting to find mainstream representation. But negative stereotypes and derogatory comments fuelled by toxic masculinity was still prevalent. In terms of my own inherent identity then i could be classed as: 35 year old Cis-Male (Beta) Gay 3 quarters White British and a quarter Black Caribbean. Mental health sufferer. No religion More liberal/left politically minded. Does this make me who I am? Is identity important? Yes, identity is extremely important. Everyone deserves the right to freely express their true selves without fear, judgement or prejudice. If it wasn’t for strong collective identities, marginalised groups (race, religion, gender, sexuality) in some aspects wouldn’t enjoy the “freedoms” (a term used very loosely) that is afforded to some groups in today’s society. People deserve visibility and representation.
What does masculinity mean to you? Masculinity is a mask, it's used to cover up. It’s a uniform. Like most, I have suffered with society’s concept of masculinity. From a young age I have fallen victim to other’s projecting their opinions on me based on my looks, physicality and mannerisms. I am not an alpha male by any means nor do i fit in this ideal trope of some athletic adonis. My inability to grow facial hair (well a fully formed breard) and other stereotypical maculine features/traits have left me feeling in some way inadequate and I believe plays a major role in my insecurities, self-confidence and my negative view of my appearance. The symbol of masculinity and manhood is the phallus. We live in a patriarchal society which favors men (real) but on the same side, limits them. For me masculinity has nothing to do with gender (Male) It’s not fixed. Not a round hole square block. It’s ever changing and fluid. Talk about the new normal “twinks” a trend that has now disrupted the status-quo and how masculinity represses individuals especially men who quietly suffer from mental health issues as a result and thus triggers aggression. Conflict, society telling you what you should be like vs your own feelings.
“Joe”
What does identity mean to you personally? Identity to me is who I am – what I look like, what I like, what I’ve done with my life so far and what I aim to achieve in the future. How would you describe your identity? I guess just what I and others would describe me as, along with what I do – a male identifying, straight, blonde haired, blue eyed, mid to late twenties actor and student.
Is Identity important? Absolutely, without individual identities there would be nothing unique in the world and by extension of that there would be no different ideas. Art, theatre, entertainment of any kind just wouldn’t exist. Everything would be so bland and boring.
What does masculinity mean to you? Masculinity is a difficult thing to pin down in this day and age, and I’m not proud of what automatically comes into my head when I think of the word because I don’t think it’s a true representation anymore, but media and sports and pop culture have constantly rammed down our throats this image of handsome, strong, muscular and assertive males as prime examples.
What do you think, being a 'male' is like in 2019? Is there any conflict within ideas, stereotypes and gender roles? How has this changed in your experience? Its changed massively in the last few years; the idea of men always being strong and emotionless is just laughable and wrong. It's scary to think of all the men who were brought up to believe showing any signs of emotion was equal to showing signs of weakness, it's such an antiquated idea that causes genuine psychological damage. In a way I wish I were being brought up in this era, I think I’d be a lot more mentally sound and have a much more adaptable and independent concept of what my identity as a male could be. Does conflict play a role within identity? I’d say so, yes, especially now when people are pointing out damaging and abusive behaviours associated with the ideas of masculinity. People who grew up believing they should behave one way are now checking themselves and seeing that they’ve been wrong, but for some people the way they have been raised isn’t so easy to forget. There’s definitely a conflict within the role of identity when a person is trying to change who they fundamentally are for the better.
Ms Mary Poppers
What does identity mean to you? Identity for me is quite an abstract concept. I’d say identity is something made up of a multitude of concepts and ideas that can define you as a person and defines how people perceive you. How would you describe your identity? I identify as queer punk. So my sexuality is gay, with a good dose of gender fuckery and I’ve got quite a punk edge to my daily life and art. Is Identity important? Yes, identity plays a big role in our place in society and it is a big part of how we interact with others. What does masculinity mean to you? Masculinity means an outdated idea about gender. Being manly or accepting ideas of masculinity means playing with the binary but accepting it as it is. What do you think, being a 'male' is like in 2019? Is there any conflict within ideas, stereotypes and gender roles? How has this changed in your experience? Being a male is pretty much accepting that gender is binary and impersonates the traditional idea of masculinity. Being butch, appearing manly. There’s still a lot of people that go by the traditional ideas of masculinity. Does conflict play a role within identity? Conflict plays a big part in queer identities, since we are always put in contrast with heteronormativity. Tell me more about your drag persona. How did it come about? Do you think it has always been a part of you? Or has it grown and developed over time? My drag persona is an extension of me. My drag being, called Mary Poppers, is a way for me to bend gender and play around freely with my gender. I believe she is a part of me, not a made up character that I portray. She’s always been in me, but putting it in a “package” as a drag queen really made a difference. Talk to me more about the duality of your identity. Does both persona's work in harmony with each other/is there conflict? Is one more dominant? When one persona is active where does the other go/live? How do they coincide? My two personas go very much hand on hand. In my daily life I still use a lot of merchandise from myself and other queens as a way of integrating these elements of my identity into my
daily routines. Loads of people just call me Mary instead of Joao (my boy name). So she’s always present
“Oliver”
What does identity mean to you? Identity means to me a collection of personal attributes that make up who you are, so your looks, style, gender etc and it creates a unique blend that people associate with you. How would you describe your identity? I would describe my identity as a quiet but creative individual but I am not scared to stand out and be brave occasionally. I would also say I am carefree and calm as well. Is Identity important? I believe identity is very important as it helps make friends, builds relationships and helps you meet new people. Because of my interests or nature, which make up my identity I can relate to people who are similar to me. What does masculinity mean to you? I think masculinity is now quite a wide topic because people are now more accustomed to people expressing themselves as they want however there is still an attachment to a traditional role of a man, how they should act, what they should wear, how they should speak. I personally don't like this traditional stereotype as that is something I don't really identify with. What do you think, being a 'male' is like in 2019? Is there any conflict within ideas, stereotypes and gender roles? How has this changed in your experience? I think being a male today is ok, but it depends how you present yourself. If you are a typical guy, as an example a "lad" who has a girlfriend, visits the pub, maybe works in a certain industry and you fit in with that identity then you can go by day by day without thinking about what you look like or how you act. In my case I am the opposite of that identity, I am not interested in the girls, the cars, so on. I would be thinking, is this too much pink? Or is what I am wearing ok? Is my hair too long? Is anyone going to give me strange looks? In that sense of being a guy it is much harder to be against the current, and have the bravery to do that without people being against you but you can make good friends who are supportive which makes it ok. Does conflict play a role within identity? Yes I believe it does, my previous example relates to this as well, but it can be tiny things as well such possibly wanting to dress in a certain way that doesn't match your current aesthetic or wanting to act in a certain way or something similar. I think there is a range of conflict from tiny to huge with someone's identity.
Back image: Unknown (found) Created on my phone using Photoshop app.