the
laureate
inside May 2011
editorials
Dr. Brown’s
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Lassiter High School volume XXVIII: issue seven President Trump? What’s Happening? Hats Off! Senior Colton 5/2-12- AP exams Bryant scored 5/7- Senior formal No Yes the winning goal 5/12- Yearbook Distribution 52% 48% against Walton 5/23- Night on the green for the region 5/25- Last day of school championship. 5/26- Graduation
a student publication of
take on teachers playing
favorites features
Wednesday AL
W ED NE SD AY S
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comedy
Rebecca Black on JFK’s assassination
sports ’s
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2-3 4-6 8-9 10-11 centerspread 12-13 features 14-17 sports 18-20 in the wry 22-23 news editorials a&e jff
A Year Of Achievment
These days, students at Lassiter High School can be seen strolling through the halls with their chins held a couple inches higher than usual. The cause of their smugness is unclear. It could be any number of reasons: the vast amount of academic awards racked up this year, Lassiter’s flourishing arts program, or maybe the formidable talent of LHS’s numerous sports teams. The past year has seen Lassiter shimmer with countless achievements. The school as a whole basked in a glow of scholarly success this year. The average SAT and ACT scores at Lassiter were well above the national averages. Individual successes included John Landers’s perfect score on the ACT and the admittance of 5 Lassiter students into the Governor’s Honor’s Program. Furthermore, several prestigious academic awards were added to Las-
siter’s trophy case. The Governor’s Office of Accountability recognized LHS as a Platinum level school for exceptional graduation test scores. Lassiter was also named an AP Merit High School by the Department of Education. In order to win this title, at least 20% of Lassiter students took an AP exam and at least half of these students scored a 3 or higher. Finally, the Department of Education named Lassiter a Georgia School of Excellence. Lassiter is highly esteemed not only for its superb academics, but also for a widely renowned fine arts program. The LHS drama program won 1st place at the regional One Act competition and went on to compete at the state level. The Orchestra performed at the prestigious Music For All festival in Indianapolis. Lassiter’s band participated in the Macy’s Day Parade in New York City, while the
chorus shared their talent with an entirely different continent when they performed in the Czech Republic. Atlanta Magazine mentioned LHS for being one of top achievers in both fine arts and athletics. The Trojans certainly put their most athletic foot forward this year. Lassiter won region or area championships in wrestling, boys soccer, boys golf, boys lacrosse, competition cheerleading, and girls lacrosse. The swim and dive team won their 4th consecutive state championship, meriting recognition from the Cobb County Board of Education. Lassiter’s 2010-2011 successes were numerous and achievements ranged far and wide. Excellence is in the air.
Ccompiled by Dr. Richie
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Lassiter drama brings Shakespeare to life Shakespeare Tavern brings ‘Romeo and Juliet’ to LHS
adrienne alderman staff writer Everyone is familiar with the tragedy of “Romeo and Juliet” by William Shakespeare. Two hormone filled teenagers of opposing families fall in love, and miscommunication leads to two tragic deaths. On Friday, April 15th, this play came to life in our very own theater. Many 9th graders and drama students were able to attend and be immersed in a cultural experience. The plot of this play is well known, and, because all 9th grade literature classes read it, was fresh in their minds as they filed into the theater. That prior knowledge led to various opinions on the performance. Alaina Buschman and Ginny Painter thought “it was really helpful to see the play come to life after reading it.” Seeing the script read live and acted out helped clarify what was going amidst the Shakespearean banter and soliloquies. However, parts of the play were omitted for time’s sake, so it was disappointing that the production could not be appreciated to its fullest. Overall the tale was performed accurately and understandably.
The director of this version of “Romeo and Juliet” took creative license and put a cheerier, more comedic twist on what is commonly presented as a serious and tragic tale. Juliet, who is the mere age of 13 in the play, finally started to act her age. By that, she was
It was really helpful to see the play come to life after reading it.
News briefs
compiled by julia regeski centerspread editor Due to the Royal Wedding, hat sales in Atlanta and across the country have significantly increased. Local shop owner Vernell Washington says, “She is exploding it. It’s the hottest, hottest trend right now.”
goofy, giggly, dramatic, loud, and much of what one expects from a young
teen. Romeo is also given the chance to behave like a young teenage boy through his mannerisms and antics. Katie Barrington, 9, says, “I liked the play a lot mostly because the way Romeo and Juliet acted. In movies, they were always viewed as very mature for 13 and 14 year olds.” The rest of the cast played their roles fantastically: Mercutio performed the Queen Mab speech wonderfully, and other actors provided drama or comedy when necessary. Another element to the experience was the costumes and set. It was a delightful surprise to see part of the Shakespeare Tavern’s set transported and set up on Lassiter’s stage. The costumes were exactly what one would imagine for the time in which Romeo and Juliet lived. Special effects added another layer to the quality of the play, and the use of gore added believability to injuries. Without the visual additions the play would have been delightful, and with it the play became marvelous. The actors did a fantastic job of entertaining and telling the tale of “Romeo and Juliet” while putting their
Colleges such as Texas A&M and Duke University have been spotlighted for their violation of a gender equality law. Male players have been competing under female names, a behavior that is being a encouraged by the coaches. Although the court case has not been fully resolved, this incident provides a check on the effectiveness of the law. On the evening of May 1st, President Barack Obama announced to the country during a televised speech that terrorist Osama Bin Laden had been killed in Pakistan. Bin Laden evaded capture for nine and half years after the terrorist organization he led, al Qaeda, flew planes into the Twin Towers on 9/11/2001.
own little twists on it. The cast is one worth seeing again in “Romeo and Juliet” or possibly some other production. They dealt with an unfamiliar setting gracefully. If given the opportunity to see a play at the Shakespeare Tavern, take it, because the actors give a ‘can’t-miss’ show.
Upcoming Events at
Shakespeare Tavern April 21May 29
A Midsummer Night’s Dream
June 2June 12
Double Falsehood
April 17May 25
Chamber Music at the Tavern
A woman in St.Petersburg, Florida found an alligator in her house, which is believed to have crawled in using the cat door. The woman believes the alligator was able to evade detection due to the “discombobulation” of her blinds.
iPhones are now said to be recording the location of their users. Studies have shown that even if the owner turns off the location services feature, the phone continues to record where the user is and how long they are there. Schools across the country have been accused of “watering down” their honors and advanced classes, meaning that challenging classes students are taking with hopes of notice from colleges may actually be on-level classes charading as more advanced classes with the purpose of more grade credit as well as notoriety for the school’s offered courses.
Did
You Know? In Elizabethan times, men and boys played all the parts in Shakespeare’s plays, including women’s roles. page
2010 2010 2011 2011 A Year in Review
renee puvvada news editor
Dr. Richie begins princpal position @ LHS AUGUST 2010
Band marches in Macy’s Day Parade
Chorus sings in Prague
Football team plays first game of season @ Georgia Dome
mented Gabe Frascella, 11, overjoyed when he found out that one of the French girls would be shadowing him From April 9 to April 20, for the day. Like Gabe, every single stua group of students from Rennes, dent at Lassiter was eager to catch a France were introduced to American glimpse of the foreigners. life. While some were hosted by Kell and some by Lassiter, all of them were overjoyed to be able to attend school here, practice their English, and make new friends. Ms. Cotton, one of the French teachers at Kell, arranged to exchange letters and Skype with a teacher in France. A real exchange wasn’t proposed until November 2010, but the real challenge for Ms. Cotton was, “to find homes for 31 students!” Contacting Mrs. McLaughlin at Lassiter, they were then able to coordinate an exchange that brought the French students on a plane to Atlanta and will later bring American kids to Rennes next year. “This is so fantastic!” com-
CCSD cancels schools for 5 days due to snow
Author Ned Vizzini visits LHS students
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MAY 2011 Cobb County calendar crisis
Their itinerary for one and a half weeks was chock full of interesting field trips all around the Atlanta area, including the Coke Museum, the CNN Center, and Stone Mountain Park. What surprised many, howev-
Students from France pay a visit
er, was their similarity to many American kids. They listen to Eminem and Wiz Khalifa, speak very good English, and watch The Hangover (aka, ahem, “Very Bad Trip” in France). French students start school at 8 AM and end school at 6 PM except for Wednesdays, which are half-days. Students are assigned to one class while teachers are the ones that move around, and comments, Madame Linda, the French students’ English teacher, “there are no colors or posters on the walls!” Many of the exchange students noticed the laid-back atmosphere of American school, plus the inclusion of courses such as art and music, which aren’t part of the curriculum in France. When French student Clara Philippe was asked which type of school she liked better, she answered with an enthused, “American!”
CCSD tried by Cobb County’s grand jury jonah ort staff writer It is safe to say that the majority of the county is not satisfied with the August 15th school calendar, and neither is the Cobb County Grand Jury, for that matter. The entire Cobb County Board of Education was questioned earlier this month regarding the recent actions of the Board. Although the official details of the questioning have not yet been released, the School Board was told that there were “grave concerns” over how it has been operating lately, in light of the highly controversial schedule change that has had students and parents in an uproar. Constant fighting and an overly-fast decision-making process have weakened trust between the Cobb Board of
the adoption of a more “traditional” calendar, as opposed to this year’s “balanced” calendar, which has seen high approval ratings from parents, teachers, and students alike. Although the “balanced” calendar was voted to see a threeyear trial period, it was voted out 4 members to 3 in favor of the “traditional” August 15th calendar, and it is to be put into effect this coming school year. Whether or not the schedule change was a main focus in the meeting is undetermined at this point, but it was certainly mentioned in acworth.patch.com the hearings. Could this meeting Time Out Cobb County’s grand jury stalls the CCSD’s decision help to recall the new schedule making for a trial. in favor of this year’s “balanced” one? Only time will tell. Education and the teachers, who have has been operating. A large factor been dissatisfied with how the Board of this sudden lack of trust has been
lhs editorials from the
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How much? Well, to be completely honest, not nearly enough. WHAT?!?! Well, think about it for a moment. Teachers don’t make that much samantha dr. money, don’t get that much respect, and these days don’t even have total job security. Some days, the only thing keeping us going is a chance to give out a bit of payback, either positive or negative. We prefer positive, Teacher’s Pets are to but a big juicy negative to a real pain Blame The Question Is Moot… in the asterisk is a close second. But what happens if we do go negative? Teachers pick favorites. Every but the Answer Is Meat Oh, detention, a call home, ISS, OSS, a day. Every year. Forever and always. slap on the wrist when we really want It’s a fundamental part of the classto slap on the cuffs. Teachers of the room society. world, it is time to follow the advice of I must say that it is not always Samuel Gompers: more! the teachers’ faults. They fall prey to I believe that all teachers the antics of those certain students should be given taser guns. There is who do whatever they can to find nothing better to make a student sit themselves on the teacher’s good up straight than a few hundred volts side. That’s right; I’m talking about the of electricity. If you teacher’s pets. check research from After spending over fifty years ago, eleven years of my life in such a policy might school, it’s easy to spot even stimulate a few the tricks of the trade of brain cells. these individuals. Taking Of course, extra time out of one’s such a policy will day to have a chat with not work for everythe teacher, expressone. With the tough ing severe interest in cases, you might the subject matter, and have to go a bit furlaughing uncontrollably ther. Quite frankly, at a teacher’s moderatethumb screws would ly humorous jokes are squeeze every bit of just a few examples of effort out of the inatthe tools you generally tentive student. The find in a teacher’s pet’s rack could encourage tool box. students to stretch Teacher’s pets their imaginations. A are disliked not only bewet board instead of cause of their annoa blackboard could ying behavior, but also samantha weissert whet their mental because they ruin it appetites and dampfor everyone else. All Almost every classroom is sure to have a student or two striving to be the en their the other students in Sycophants teacher’s pet. mischievous the classroom who are spirits. It may not merely trying to get exist yet, but a cell by are forgotten in the Regrettably, the same goes for the op- Do teachers play favorites? shadows of the designated pet. Such posite. Teachers also pick the students Are you kidding me? The question is phone/I-POD shredder would make a welcome addition to any classroom… is evident when one of my seventh they dislike the most. These are the moot. grade teachers didn’t know my name students who get in trouble for mak- The real questions are how especially if the student had to place it in the machine while it was running. If when I asked her to sign my yearbook. ing jokes the teacher would laugh at if much, how often, and how come. I was no match for the student who it was made by someone they actually Well, let’s tackle the third question you nap in class, you get the dirt nap. read three books a night and told the like. This always escalates to a hate- first. If you accept the premise that If you sleep, you get the big sleep. teacher about it every morning. hate relationship. Some blatantly show teachers are human beings, then you As for all those children left behind, However, there are other la- their dislike while others try to hide it. realize that we are going to follow hu- well, let’s just say it might add new beling-of-student processes by teach- However, it never goes unnoticed. man nature. If you treat us badly, we meaning to Mystery Meat Monday. ers that are recognized. One set of So a word of advice, be a will treat you badly. If you try hard and It might even spark new discussion labels is the “A” student, the “B” stu- model student the first couple weeks. pretend we are interesting, we will be- about problem students. dent, and the “Not so Great” student. Be that student who laughs too loud lieve you and reward you. In short, we Teacher 1: “How was Andrew today?” These labels are set after the first cou- and sucks up. If your set yourself up do it because we can, but we prefer a Teacher 2: “With a little ketchup, not bad.” ple weeks of the school and generally right, then it’ll be smooth sailing the benevolent dictatorship. remain for the rest of the year. “A” stu- rest of the year. How often? Every single day.
student
weissert
dents can expect A’s on every paper whether they all deserve one or not. The same goes for the “B” students and the unfortunate “Here’s Another Bad Grade to Add to the Collection” students. This system provides a much appreciated predictability factor to grading. It gets rid of the risk of receiving any unwanted surprises. Sadly, it also nullifies the phrase, “Better luck next time,” that is found to be quite favorable to the third category of students. Overall, teachers pick favorites and there’s no way around it.
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Teachers picking their pets
Did
You Know? The average American woman is 5’4” tall and weighs 140 pounds. The average Ameican model is 5’11” tall and weighs 117 pounds. page
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Getting comfortable in your own skin even look like super models afters the air brushed “flawless tan” disappears, the “computer thinning software” is colleen removed, and the “blemish free electronic touch-ups,” are erased. A healthcare site stated, “Girls are constantly bombarded with media messages to mimic a physical ideal As the summer months ap- depicted by body-baring swimwear proach, bathing suit season arises. or lingerie models in magazines and Teenage girls start the newest weight- catalogues.” We are left with the imloss trends hoping to shed pounds off pression that all girls look flawless their already slender and thin on a bodies. One health “No matter how old, how beach. Have care magazine ever takthin, how thick, how tan, you states, “Many teenen time away how pale, or how trendy a from worrying age girls go through a lot of unneces- girl may look at the beach, about what sary stress over the people think thought of how they at the pool, or on the cover of you at the of a magazine, they too look in a bikini.” beach, and The state- have struggles just like you.” look around? ment , “We are our No matter own worst critics.” how old, how is so very true. Girls, the truth is no thin, how thick, how tan, how pale, one else is scrutinizing your body and or how trendy a girl may look at the appearance nearly as closely as you beach, at the pool, or on the cover of a are. Reality check, super models don’t magazine, they too have struggles just
purdy
like you. It’s time for teen girls to feel better in their own skin. No matter how many diet fads, or “lifestyle changes” you may go through in your lifetime, the body you have now will be the only one you get, so get used to
feeling comfortable in it. Don’t spend your summer months worried about comparing your body to the bodies of others. Rather go to the beach, be confident, don’t stress yourself out, its vacation, and have some fun.
sessions.edu
Fake
Try to spot the differences between the real image and the airbrushed version.
Going crazy over going green jeff
ciesielski The great thing about America is that there are so many choices to be made: where to eat, what to wear, where to work, how to live your life. Ideally, you should be able to make these choices with little to no grief from society. Yet there is one choice that if you choose wrongly you will be chastised by a group with too much influence: whether or not to go “green.” I for one refuse to go green. I like drinking water out of plastic bottles that take thirty years to decompose. I like driving a car that gets twelve miles to the gallon. I like leaving on lights and the television when I leave my house so my dog feels like there is someone
in the house. I admit that really caring about the environment is a good thing, but it is not that important to me. Usually people are modest about doing a good deed; you will never hear someone boast about how much money he/she gave to charity last year. Environmentalists never received that memo. If one of them catches you climbing out of an SUV, you will get a look laura brink that is usually reserved for when you drop kick a pupLassiter students don’t always take advantage of the Waste recycling bins in the cafeteria py into a wood chipper. For some unexplained reason, degradable” plastic bottle, I spray ten they have the right to make anyone “saving” the planet. However, please do the rest cans of hair spray into the air, turn on feel guilty as sin when they do any- of us a favor and keep your goodwill every electric appliance in my house, thing to “harm” the environment. For those of you who are en- to yourselves. Because every time I get and leave my car running for an hour. vironmentalists, good for you. You are berated for drinking out of a “non-bio-
lhs editorials laura
brink
G r i e va n c e s from last year
years back but the recent footballers for you to pretend to enjoy the energy It has been one heck of a year deserve the same support. The stu- and excitement we share as a school? at LHS and though we have had plenty dent body has been acting as if they Suck it up, it’s fun when you get over of high points, this article is to pay trib- are trying to lose. I really doubt that. yourself. ute to those delightful events that had As for pep rallies, is it really so painful Most recently, there is the removal all Lassiter pessimists grinning with of the ice/fresh water machine a know-it-all glow. To prevent furin the cafeteria. Oh ice machine, ther errors, the Lassiter Laureate we never realized how much presents you with the 2010-2011 we loved you until you were grievances. so crudely snatched from us. Chronologically the first grievNot only are we now forced to ance of the 2010-2011 school year drink the fountain water (there is the original parking lot order. is just something about it) we Why why why after so many years also must go without the only of flip-flopping would the adminissource of ice in the school for tration decide once again to return students. No longer can we ento the nuisance that is assigned joy pleasantly refreshing chilled parking? We thank you dearly for ice water. And it is tragic. Truly the return of free for all parking truly tragic. but a word of advice for next year: Of course, there is the schedjust start on the right foot, you alule drama, but if you are thinkready knew assigned parking does ing what I’m thinking, you are not work. probably tired of hearing about Now a double whammy for you; the schedule debacle and its the combination of pep rally fails endless, fruitless debates. and the overnight drop of football So there you have it LHS, support. We are so proud of the laura brink happy pessimism to you all. Get success our football team had two Robbed Students said goodbye to cold water excited for next year. when the ice machine disappeared
Ode to AP exams Ah, the AP exams: friend of none, foe of many. There are many aspects of AP exams which can be intimidating: difficulty, importance, their sheer length. However, for myself and many others, worst of all is the timed free response portion. A student is given the free response topics, all at the same time as if he weren’t overwhelmed enough, and after an oh-so-gratuitous 10 minute planning session, is commanded “Now dance,” by the test proctors. Students must attempt the incredible feat of writing x number of essays in y amount of time. Consider the case of last year’s AP World History exam. Three essays in just 2 hours? The first essay was quite easy. Then came the
second essay. After a good 9 minutes of constructive thumb twiddling I began to form a meek outline in my head and decided just to go with it. Midway through the essay I hear the proctor announce, “Thirty minutes remaining.” Surely this woman is delirious, I think. Regardless, this announcement is all the stimulus needed to trigger enough adrenaline in my body to lift a fallen tree off of my trapped child…if I had a child. I finish the essay and immediately begin my final one without any semblance of an idea as to where it’s going. I’m getting through it alright, thinking that everything is going to be okay when the proctor announces “Five minutes remaining.” Oh now she’s just teasing me. I scribble down a paragraph or two more, with no time for any of the flowery language which had marked my first
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The Laureate Staff 2010-2011 Editors-in-Chief Annabel Edwards Natalie Kieta Tyler Molinaro
News Editor Renee Puvvada
Editorials Editor Samantha Weissert
A&E Editor Jeff Ciesielski
JFF Editor Austin Hayes
Centerspread Editors Laura Brink Julia Regeski
Features Editor Colleen Purdy
Comedy Editor Will Morris
Sports Editor Jack Herman
Staff Writers matthiew
burchfield two essays. Despite this, the session ended before my essay did. It was quite the bittersweet moment. If you or someone you love is taking an AP exam, try or offer to him a strategy which has helped me deal with stress ever since in fifth grade when I was informed by my teacher that my biome project, which I had worked on tirelessly for two weeks, was extremely sub-par and I would be allowed 24 hours to redo it and turn it in. It is a strategy of constantly being apathetic. Study hard, but in all other walks of life, try your best to forget entirely about the upcoming exams.
Adrienne Alderman Eric Ankerholz Matthew Burchfield Julia Lebow Jonah Ort Audrey Skaggs
Advisor Mr. Todd Henry The Laureate is a student publication of Lassiter High School; a member of the Georgia Scholastic Press Association. Editorials reflect the opinions of individual writers and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Lassiter High School, Cobb County Schools, or their administrators. Financial support for The Laureate is obtained through advertising and subscription sales, and generous patron contributions.
Lassiter High School 2601 Shallowford Road Marietta, Georgia 30066 (678) 494-7863 lhspress@gmail.com issuu.com/lhspress
lhs a&e
The attack of Mac
austin hayes jff editor
popular mix tapes within seven months. “K.I.D.S” and “Best Day Ever” “Everybody please put a have been downloaded over 500,000 thumb in the air!” is one of Mac Mill- times. Additionally, he released an er’s signature lines. It implies that EP (Extended Play) in late March that the song coming up will be a hit. This consists of 6 new songs. William Robnineteen year old kid started rapping inson, 10, says, “I’ve been listening in his basement in Pittsburg when to Mac ever since K.I.D.S came out he was only sixteen. His first mix and I haven’t listened to anyone else tape, “But My since.” Mackin’ Aint T o Easy,” dropped top it all right at the off, Mac beginning of had his his career and “Incredistarted a revobly Dope lution. To u r ” A t during eighteen, Mac Janusigned with ary and Rostrum ReFebrucords, the ary, and company that now sbgmovement.com is also signed on his Wiz Khalifa. Triumph Miller flashes his infamous thumbs “ G r e e n up, signaling success. By the time Carpet he was signed, To u r,” he already released three more mix featuring Wiz Khalifa, which will have tapes and his popularity in America two stops in Georgia. One is at the was rapidly growing. Masquerade in Atlanta on May 11 and He released two of his most the other is on the 12th in Athens.
page annabel edwards editor-in-chief Source Code stars Jake Gyllenhaal as Colter Stevens, an army helicopter pilot who awakes one morning to find himself aboard an unfamiliar train. The woman across from him
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relive the explosion until he uncovers the bomb and the bomber. Source Code reels the audience in fast and keeps them there. Although Stevens relives the same 8 minutes countless times, the scenes are always fresh due to ingenious attention to detail and creative cinematography. A
Source Code review
imdb.com
Intensity
Gyllenhaal shares a powerful and romantic scene with his costar.
seems convinced that she and Stevens are flirty companions, though he has no idea who she is. One glance in the mirror later, and he realizes he has no idea who he is either. But before Stevens has time to figure out what’s going on, the train explodes. Instead of dying, Stevens finds himself strapped inside some sort of capsule, where an officer clears up his bewilderment. She explains that he’s been selected by the government to perform a mission and was transported from another time and place via a computer program (called Source Code). She also informs him that he will continue to return to the train and
glance away from the screen may result in confusion, but viewers will be eager to follow the confusing story line attentively. Don’t over think the plot or its logical lapses will begin to present themselves. This stream lined, action infused film moves powerfully through the story’s many twists. But beneath the explosions and gunshots lays a softer love story and, as Stevens’s true circumstances are revealed, a character that struggles with life’s deeper questions. Source Code is a wild ride that will get your head whirling and your heart pounding, but it’ll keep you smiling along the way.
10 Reggae songs for summer listening 1. “Decide when you’re gone”- S.O.J.A. 2. “Let Loose”- The Expendables 3. “Lay me Down”- The Dirty Heads 4. “Rent”- Pepper 5. “You Got Me”- The Supervillians 6. “Sweet Honey”- Slightly Stoopid 7. “Could you be loved?”- Bob Marley 8. “What I Got”- Sublime 9. “ Thiefin’”- Machel Montano 10. “Homeless”- Sabotage Sound system
Did
You Know? American composer John Cage composed a work in 1952 entitled 4’ 33”, which consists of four minutes and thirty-three seconds of silence. page
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Vans Warped Tour 2011 vince gonzalez staff writer Summer is fast approaching and it is time once again for the Vans Warped Tour to come to Atlanta. Each year the touring music and extreme sports festival travels throughout the United States bringing musicians from all genres to major cities. Consisting of over ten stages, bands play thirty minute sets to give fans a sample of their high energy music. Gavin Caffrey, 11, has been to over five warped tours and describes the atmosphere as “unlike anything I’ve ever experienced.” The tour started in 1994 by Kevin Lyman when he got the Energy idea from working numerous skateboarding shows. Hoping to create an exciting atmosphere for both athletes and mu-
The only major change since its inception has been the shift from a punk influenced line up to one of hip hop and metal. However, punk legends such as NOFX and Bad Religion can still be found on tour. “This year’s lineup is much better than years past,” commented freshman Reid Diaz. The lineup this year includes rock bands: A Day to Remember, A Skylit Drive, The Devil Wears Prada, and Woe is Me. Also on the tour are reggae/ska bands: Less Than Jake, Pepper, and The Expendables. Reid hopes to visit this year’s tour with his entire family. “I spend practically all of my time with my mom talking about the show and counting down the days,” described Reid. All genres of music will be represented and athletes from many extreme sports will be ready for action. So, davidbergman.net if on August 1, 2011 you find Shows at Warped often feature high energy performers that get the yourself with nothing to do, crowds excited. head on over to Lakewood has been a mainstay for over fifteen by bands and other companies giving and enjoy this once in a lifetime expefans a chance to meet their heroes. rience. years. sicians, Lyman attempted to combine a skate park with a music venue. The result was the 1994 Warped Tour and
Other than half pipes and massive music stages, the tour boasts an impressive amount of booths worked
Restaurant of the month: Flip Burger
tyler molinaro editor in chief
make it onto Flip’s menu would hardly be labeled conventional, with some of the items bearing names like “blackened shrimp”, “rBQ”, and “fauxlaffel.”
on traditional American cuisine. Also be sure not to miss their gigantic onion rings, and, of course, their famous liquid nitrogen milk There are few restaurants in shakes. The shakes change seathis world that can actually be sonally but feature the regulars described as different or excitof burnt marshmallow and nuing. There are even fewer that tella (which is even better than have you asking when you can it sounds) and krispy creme (the come back again as you walk process for this shake begins out to your car. Flip Burger, lowith donuts going into a blender. cated at 1587 Howell Mill Rd, Enough said). The choices here Atlanta, GA 30318, is one of always promise to be unorthodox, the few. I have three words for but will leave you wondering why you: liquid nitrogen milkshakes. you’ve never had them before. If you are not already driving All in all, Flip burger is a resto this restaurant after heartaurant that simply has to be exing that, there is something legitimately wrong with you. But andrewespe.com perienced once. After that, it has to be experienced as often as posjust in case you aren’t sold yet, Blais’s infamous burgers often feature unusual yet delicious toppings. sible. There are few restaurants I’ll elaborate. Say it with me Gourmet that can be described as different now: burnt marshmallow + nuor exciting, but Flip Burger mantella liquid nitrogen milkshakes. Chef: All Stars. He puts a creative twist The burgers are like nothing you have ages to nab both labels. Don’t believe Now stop reading and drive. Flip’s creative director (the on American cuisine, taking burgers ever had and the restaurant offers a me? Try it. And seriously, bring me a man behind the magic) is Richard to a new dimension. The burgers that wide selection of outstanding twists milkshake. Blais. If the name sounds hauntingly familiar, it’s because Blais was a fan favorite on Top Chef: Chicago and was recently crowned the victor of Top
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Homework Formerly Firework by Katy Perry
my
What
grinds gears
vince gonzalez staff writer Do you know what really grinds my gears? STUPID QUESTIONS. I hate to break it to you, but your teachers lied, there is such a thing as a stupid question. Now do not get me wrong, I am not talking about a question involving misunderstanding what seems a simple matter to others. Believe me; I have misunderstood what others found simple or obvious many times. I am talking about plain old, downright idiotic questions. Many things qualify a question as being stupid. One, when the teacher answered it five seconds ago! Pay attention! Save us all from having to hear the teacher speak again by listening the first time. A second instance in which your question can be seen as stupid is when you are simply asking the question to get on the teachers “good side”. I do not believe that a teacher is flattered when a student repeats what she just said but forms it into a question. This is normally done by teenage girls hoping to appear
Do you ever feel like you’re failin’ math, Like it’s killing you, You wanna kill it back? Do you ever slack, don’t turn your homework in Feed it to your dog And then do it again? Do you ever feel already buried deep Six feet under scream But no one seems to hear a thing Do you know that there’s still a chance for you To get your grade up but
smarter or better students than all the others. Honestly, you don’t appear any smarter and your classmates will see you as is a brownnoser. A final opportunity for a student to ask a stupid question is when it has absolutely nothing to do with the topic. This question is usually preceded by “I know this is off topic, but…”, and is followed by either an outrageous attempt at humor, or a thought completely unrelated to anything occurring at the present time. It may also be followed by some overachieving thought that has no business being in a teenage mind. If it has nothing to do with the situation at hand, then don’t ask it. So for all you stupid question askers out there let me enlighten you. You’re not funny, you’re not clever, and you’re not cute; you’re annoying. So please Lassiter students, save us all and do not ask stupid questions.
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You just gotta destroy the rest It ain’t no jest Just own the test ‘Cause you know, you’re the best
The season’s on its way, and the school’s doors will close You better finish strong, no there is no time to doze After school’s over then, then your mind can blow Until then, you know You just gotta destroy the rest It ain’t no jest Just own the test ‘Cause you know, you’re the best Just baby do your homework Come on show ‘em what you’re worth Make ‘em go “Huh, huh, huh?” As you point and say “duh, duh, duh!” Maybe even study more Even though it’s such a chore Make ‘em go “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” All their minds you’re gonna blow, blow, blow
Wow, wow, wow You’re so bright that they’ll say “how, how how?” It’s always been inside of you, you, Just baby do your homework you Come on show ‘em what you’re worth And now it’s time to let it through Make ‘em go “Huh, huh, huh?” As you point and say “duh, duh, duh!” Cause man you did your homework You went and showed them what Maybe even study more you’re worth Even though it’s such a chore You made them go “hey, hey, hey!” Make ‘em go “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” As you got up to an A, A, A All their minds you’re gonna blow, blow, blow Wow you even studied more Even though it’s such a chore You don’t have to feel like you’re Made ‘em go “hey, hey, hey!” gonna fail As you got up to an A, A, A You will beat this class, not even gonna wail Boom, boom, boom Summer’s coming soon, it’s what the You’re even brighter than the moon, future holds moon, moon After this hurricane will come a rain- Boom, boom, boom bow You’re even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
Did
You Know? Lemons contain a larger amount of sugar than stawberrys.
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Top 10
Rasberry Lemonade Heat 1 cup of sugar and 1 cup of water until the sugar dissolves. Mix it with 1 cup of lemon juice in a pitcher. Add 4 cups of cold water and 2 tablespoons of raspberry sauce and serve cold for a tangy and fruitful drink that will leave you as cool as a cucumber on even the most sizzling summer days.
Vacation spots compiled by colleen purdy
Apple Pie Granita
Atlantis Resort and Casino
1 Drinks that taste like summer 2 3 4 5 Where’s waldo? 6 7 8 9 10 Mix 3 cups of apple juice, ½ cup of sugar, 1 tablespoon of lemon juice, and ½ teaspoon of cinnamon in a sauce pan over medium heat. Heat the mixture until the sugar dissolves, and then transfer to glasses to freeze. If an apple pie and a snow cone had a baby, this drink would be it. It’s like eating sugary, apple pastry-flavored icicle shavings.
Paradise Island, Bahamas
Snowbird Ski and Summer Resort
“You can never go wrong with a good summer drink in the middle of July. My favorite is rasberry lemonade.”- Tommy Munns, 10
Snowbird, Utah
Tanque Verde Ranch
Tuscon, Arizona
Stawberry Agua Fresca
Dissolve 1/3 cup of sugar in 3 cups of water. Mix it in a blender with 6 cups of strawberries and ¼ cup of lime juice. The result will be a light, honeyed, and surprisingly decadent smoothie-like drink.
Watermelon Blaster
Put 3 cups of watermelon, 1 cup of strawberries, 3 tablespoons of lime juice, and 1 cup of ice cubes in a blender and blend until smooth, serving cold. There’s nothing better than watermelon on a hot June day. Oh wait, there is: this scrumptious, heavenly drink is sweeter than nectar and beats plain old watermelon out of the park any day.
Summer time version
Hilton Waikoloa Village
Waikoloa, Hawaii
Kingsmill Resort
Williamsburg, Virginia Circus Circus
Las Vegas, Nevada
Out ‘n’ About Treesort
Takilma, Oregon
Club Med Ixtapa
Ixtapa, Mexico
La Costa Resort and Spa
Carlsbad, California
Disney’s Animal Kingdom Lodge
www.whereswaldo.com
Orlando, Florida
Playlist Getaways Miss you What are you listening to this summer?
What will you mi
Where are you vacationing?
“The safety of my loc 11 “Crying myself to and physics” Blair Bar Mrs. Debbie Isenble and Mr. Henry.” Skye income from my paren
You’re So Last Summer by Taking Back Sunday Adison Picchi, 11 Pocketful of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield Maria Bacce, 10 The Thrill by Wiz Kalifa Allie Snyder, 11 Black and Yellow by Wiz Kalifa Jeff Green, 9 Opposite of Adults by Chiddy Bang Brandon Ruege, 11
julia regeski
laura brink
Hilton Head Diana Gambone, 10 Panama City Beach Zoe Kakuo, 10 Cruise to the Bahamas Jaylin McCray, 9 Jersey Shore Will Sullivan, 10 My Hometown in Wisconsin Leslie Lobo, 11
sydeny white
H
e r e
chad murray
The Laureate e minds of stud their long-awa tion from L
m o c
SU
Get ‘er done Excursions already What adventures are you going on?
iss about Lassiter?
cker.” Kristy Davis, sleep from APUSH rron, 11 “The kids.” etter “Mrs. Nichols e Rubel, 12 “Assured nts.” Cory Shaw, 12
sydeny white-
Hiking Montana Clair Thibadeau, 11 A trip to Egypt Marriam Elfakahany, 9 Visiting Jerusalem Hana Abdullah, 9 New Six Flags roller coaster Roger Kingsron, 9 Traveling Europe Mackenzie White, 11
What’s the top thing on your to-do list?
“Get a sweet tan” Katie Hooper, 9 “Go wakeboarding” Ahmad Alexander, 9 “Play softball” Mckenzie Kayler, 10 “Do absolutely nothing” Levi Marenda, 9 “Open a lemonade stand.” Alex Lee, 11
laura brink
explores the dents upon aited vacaLassiter.
laura brink
julia regeski
mes t h
e
UN
jessica inglall
olivia tuttle
lhs features
You are loved in support of Josh Wittes and you courtesy of rob wittes
Lacrosse
Through the sport he loved, Josh developed bonds with his teammates and was supported both on and off the playing field.
cory shaw editor-in-chief “You’re in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort there.” As if by fate, Sarah McLachlan’s “Angel” played in the background at the local coffee shop. Amidst our conversation came a pause, and then a tear. Lassiter sophomore Josh Wittes passed away on March 10th, 2011, from injuries sustained as a result of a suicide attempt after struggling with depression. He is survived by his mother Kelly, father Rob, and brothers David and Zach. He is also survived by an undeniable community of support. “Between the people from our neighborhood, our temple, my workplace, our lacrosse community, and from Lassiter and other schools, there’s an overwhelming outpouring of love and support,” comments Mr. Wittes. This love has made its way to Josh’s Facebook page, where conversations carry on among his friends about their many fond memories. Mr. Wittes goes on, “One of the only reasons I use Facebook is to check Josh’s wall. People that knew Josh unabashedly use Facebook to convey their feelings
towards him, to remember him, and it’s good for everyone involved.” One such comment from his girlfriend, sophomore Mackenzie Culkin, on March 10th read: “Baby, I’ve been home since about 4:30 and I can’t find a way to fall asleep. Even before this, you’re always on my mind every single moment of every single day. I want to be strong for you because I know it would make you proud.” The two had been together since the beginning of freshman year, and they had grown unequivocally close. “I really do love him and always will. He was the most amazing person I knew. He could put a smile on your face no matter how upset you were,” she remarks.
“
I really do love him and always will. He was the most amazing person I knew. He could put a smile on your face no matter how upset you were.
”
In reference to Mackenzie, Mr. Wittes doesn’t hesitate to say, “We had three boys, and we always wanted a girl. She’s like my adopted daughter and her dad my brother. She’s at my
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idea in my head the day after the incident, and I knew I had to do it. That morning I ordered 1,600 bracelets.” Because of Facebook, Erynn’s bracelets with the message of “You are Loved” went viral. She goes on, “I had someone from every school in Cobb County selling bracelets at their school. I even had people in other states asking if there was a way they could get a bracelet.” Nearly every one she ordered has been sold, with all profits going to the Wittes family. “She’s a hero. Here’s somebody that has unconditional love, and boundless compassion and energy. The capacity people have to do good and care about others is a wonderful thing,” remarks Mr. Wittes. Sophomore Emma Protis knew Josh and Mackenzie since she was 11 years-old, when the group of middle school kids would spend their weekend nights at the Northampton Clubhouse. The day following his suicide attempt, Emma posted to Facebook an event that within an hour had at least 800 people attending. Her idea was to tangibly prove the existence of love and support for Josh Wittes by having the entire school wear red. “After talking with Mackenzie, I chose red because of Josh’s insane obsession with the Ohio State Buckeyes. Those of us who had the privilege of knowing Josh can easily picture him in his favorite red Ohio State shirt with his infamous little smirk on his face,” she explains. Upon entering the halls of Lassiter the following morning for a prayer session, she recalls that “every hallway, every classroom, every teacher, and every friend was covered in his Ohio State red.” Emma’s idea had been proven successful. As she remarks, “If he didn’t know how much we all cared before, he surely did then. I wanted him to get to see our love before he left.”
house nearly every single day. It’s a mutual feeling of love.” Another comment on April 14th, from sophomore Julia Lebow, says, “It’s surprising how different things seem now that you’re gone. Miss you, bud.” Her connection with the Wittes runs deep. The two families grew close together through neighborhood events, Hebrew school, and Jewish holidays. She recounts, “No matter where he was, he was always ready to dole out one of his mischievous grins.” Her father is the Rabbi of Temple Kol Emeth of Marietta, and was with Josh everyday while he was at Scottish Rite Hospital of Atlanta. Rabbi Lebow conducted the funeral service and delivered a special service for teens. Senior Erynn LaFlamme was never close friends with Josh, only seeing him on the lacrosse practice fields this fall. Yet, she felt an obligation to aid the family in ways Mr. cory shaw Wittes would later Erynn’s bracelets for Josh are worn call heroic. She ex- Support community-wide. plains, “God put this
Did
You Know? If you or anyone you know needs help, never hesitate to contact The Link Counseling Center at www.thelink.org. The Link serves all ages and offers psychotherapy for individuals, couples, families, and groups.
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Unfortunately, the same plat- “Josh was a loving and great son and organization that recovers life-saving ical sense out of something that seems form that evoked such heroism in oth- brother, but the poor choices he made organs for transplantation, Josh do- illogical. People don’t see themselves ers also evoked thoughts of depression by self-medicating with street drugs nated one of his kidneys to a married the way others see them. People have 59 year-old man who had been on the an abundance of things that aren’t in Josh. Mr. Wittes transplant list since April of 2009. His even material things. They’re evercomments, “Josh other kidney was transplanted into a lasting, like talking, reading, writing, was cyber bullied 50 year-old mother of two and grand- laughing, telling jokes.” on Facebook, in mother of five who had been waiting “If I could talk to Josh right now, ways that would since May of 2007. A 60 year-old reI’d tell him how loved he is. I’d tell him never be said face tired member of the military and hus- he has such an amazing family, friends, to face.” Basic huband of 33 years received his liver. Mr. and girlfriend. I’d tell him about how man interaction Wittes exclaims, “He saved three peo- much he changed my outlook on life, has altogether ple who are alive changed. He conand thank him for now seeing their tinues, “When I getting me closer children and grew up and you to God,” says g ra n d c h i l d re n had a problem with Erynn. Mr. Wittes because of this.” someone, you had agrees, “You reThe Wittes famto tell them to their ally understand ily will be invited face, and it would what’s important to the Carter be dealt with. Now after this. You get courtesy of rob wittes Center in the fall it’s all piled on wrapped up in Josh and David were brothers by blood, to receive recanonymously.” things that that Twins and friends by choice. ognition for this The latest are trivial. You statistics shed light on the increasing should remind all students that sui- most humanitarget mad at somesusceptibility of teenage depression. cide is never an option, and the use of ian and generous body for cutting Nearly 20 percent of teens will experi- street drugs only leads to bad results.” act. you off or treating ence depression, an issue compound- Our community has already Josh Wittes you poorly, but ed by the social stigma surrounding witnessed that tragedy is often birth to was a best friend you don’t know it. “If you get a battle wound, you’re to so many. “A lot what they’re goa hero. If you break your arm, people If you get a battle wound, of people made ing through.” sign the cast. This supposed badge of it clear that he In lieu of honor is nonexistent with mental dis- you’re a hero. If you break always had their sending flowers, orders. “Your brain is traumatized, and your arm, people sign the back. If you were the Wittes famwe are embarrassed to talk about it,” his friend you ily asks for donacourtesy of mackenzie culkin explains Mr. Wittes. It’s nothing less cast. This supposed badge knew he would tions to either and Josh had than an ignorance of society when, of honor is nonexistent support you,” re- Love Mackenzie Scottish Rite Hosbeen dating two years. according to the same statistics, more calls Mr. Wittes. of Atlanta, with mental disorders. Mackenzie reiterates his point, “He LifeLink Foundation, pital than two-thirds of teens with depresor the Link Counsion won’t seek help from a trusting could put a smile on your face no mat- seling Center. Meanwhile, they are family member, friend, or counselor. positive change. “There have already ter how upset you were. He cared too moving forward through the coping He reiterates, “Students should please been a handful of Josh’s friends that much about his friends and would have process. “The first few weeks, you’re reach out to someone they trust if are now drug free. They have learned done anything for them.” He was the incapacitated. You’re in this surreal they are struggling with depression is- that it is not a healthy lifestyle for them x-factor in the junior lacrosse team, a cloud of trauma. We’re a close famsues and know that they are not alone. or anybody. It is that change of behav- member of the Varsity Trojan lacrosse ily, and we’ve gotten closer. We’ll see Everybody goes through something in ior, which in tragedy, has led to good,” team, and a gifted athlete no matter where this brings us. But just like anytheir lives, whether those things may exclaims Mr. Wittes. the sport. His fearlessness on the field thing else in life, we’re learning. We’re seem insignificant, like having trouble There’s no greater deed than was unparalleled. Mr. Wittes goes on, learning how to move on with our in a class, or more powerful and con- giving someone another chance at life. “He was the spark that made things lives. Because you have to,” explains suming, like losing a job or a friend.” Several of Josh’s organs were donated happen. If he’d get hit and fall to the Mr. Wittes. According to Mr. Wittes, un- to Georgian citizens in dire need. “The ground, he’d bounce right back up. He He finishes, “If only one studerstanding that to err is human is the death of someone you love is the most was a true fighter for the underdog. ” dent is saved by this honesty, then J o s h Josh’s life will not be in vain and his first step in ridding yourself of depres- painful event lived a life de- memory will live on forever.” So here’s sive thoughts and actions. He states, “I a family can voted to the to the proclamation that you, like Josh, wish people could look themselves in experience. sport he loved are loved and supported by so many. the mirror and understand it’s hard to Yet, through and surround- “Those who are thinking about suiwake up and put one foot in front of our loss we ed by people cide, take a look around. Think about the other. That’s what life is. You take it were able to who cherished your families and friends. Think about as a challenge and not issues, as an op- see an ophis time. Mr. how crushed you would be without portunity and not problems. You see a portunity to Wittes wishes those people in your own life, and put future to look forward to.” help others that “Josh knew yourself in their shoes,” says Erynn. A number of studies have with the gift one-tenth of shown that engaging in risky behavior, of life,” says For now, though, as a swarm the people that of people come and leave the coffee such as alcohol, drug, or sexual abuse, Mr. Wittes. add to the synergistic effects of depres- So, through courtesy of rob wittes cared for him,” shop, time stops and pain turns to hope as he com- summed up in the simple thought that sion and increase the risk for suicide the LifeLink The love of family is life’s greatest ments, “You Josh is in the arms of an angel, finding in teens. In cautioning others about Foundation, Family blessing. can’t make log- the comfort he was looking for. Josh’s drug use, Mr. Wittes implores, a non-profit
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lhs features from the
audrey skaggs staff writer
The academic pep rally is a chance for students who acquire a GPA over 3.0 in the last semester and have an honor card to miss a few hours of class and witness a great event. All the students present found the pep rally to be a spectacular show. “Blast From the Past” was the theme for this year’s academic pep rally. Many students and teachers got the chance to showcase their talent in front of those that were lucky enough to be in attendance. The hosts this year were Mrs. Nichols, Mr. Slater, and Coach Galvin, who showed off their surprising capacity for humor. The performances included music stylings from the 1950’s to 2011. There were many bands, vocal features, and even some unbelievable dances. The step team and the girl’s swim team also made an appearance. One of the
best crowd pleasers was the show put on by the chess cheerleaders starring Will Morris and Meredith LeVan. They cheered on an intense match between Adison Picchi and Dr. Brown. The show ended with a splash with a dance by many of the science teachers, including Mrs. Perkerson, Ms. Adams, and Mrs. Helms, who dressed up in the uniforms of many of Lassiter’s extracurricular activities. All together, the show was a huge hit and would not have been possible without all the planning by Renaissance and Mrs. Morgan. The students in Renaissance put a lot of work into the production of this amazing show, from decorating to making sure the show ran efficiently. The end result was that all the students and teachers tremendously enjoyed the show and eagerly anticipate next year’s academic pep rally.
austin hayes jff editor
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Camp Counselor – This job requires a lot of outdoor activities and teaches you great leadership skills as well as serving as a self esteem booster.
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Lifegaurd – bring in the bucks while getting a tan. It is a win-win. Though there is a lot of responsibility on your shoulders, usually if you keep an eye on everyone, you will be just fine. Working at a frozen yogurt shop – Many different frozen yogurt shops have sprung up in the area in the past year. Many people enjoy this job because it is very easy. The only skills needed are the ability to weigh yogurt and count change.
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Golf Course – Usually at this age, you can start to caddy. You will be bringing in the bucks from tips if you work at a expensive course. Lawn Care – Though this seems like a lot of work, if you start a small business and charge $40 a lawn, many people will hire you. Most lawn care companies charge $70-80 a lawn, so many people take your deal. Swim Coach – Waking up in the morning at 8, putting a swim suit on, and working for three hours does not sound too bad. To go along with that, the pay is really good for a one month job. Amusement Park – Usually when you work at an amusement park, you just help people find where they want to go and make sure no one gets hurt. Also, you may possibly get free admission to the park whenever you want which is a definite plus.
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Did
You Know? July traditionally has the highest employment for teenagers, with more than half of teens from 16 to 19 years old holding down a summer job.
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Formal Wednesdays A group of Lassiter’s classiest men is revolutionizing Wednesdays, one tie at a time will morris in the wry editor “Wear slacks to school? I think I’ll stick to my hoodie-sweatpants combo, thanks,” stated Scott Smith, 11. He makes a good point. Why would anyone willingly subject themselves to an entire school day fighting with your tie and worrying about stains? It’s easier and far more comfortable to just throw on some fleece pajama pants and head out the door. Many students Classy here at Lassiter hold that belief to be true, and who can blame them? Everyone loves a good pair of sweatpants. The idea for Formal Wednesday can be credited to Jake Schaffer, 12. When asked about his involvement he explains, “I was introduced to the idea my freshman year by
follow in respect to what it means to be “formal.” If a nice button down shirt is a step-up from your usual wardrobe, it counts. Tuxedo? Party it up. Cocktail dress? Why not? As long as what you wear is a notch above your usual garb, go crazy. A Facecourtesy of colleen purdy book group has Some of Lassiter’s classiest gather on Wednesdays to read the paper, discuss current events, been created, and contemplate the meaning of life. open to the pubthe founding mother, Calyn Roth. ripped jeans and tank tops, if only lic of course, where you can join for It exists on hump day in an effort to for one day a week. As a bonus, case reminders or classy conversation. It’s motivate students through the rest studies have shown that dressing up not a club, it’s not a clique, it’s an idea. of the week. Fortunately, Dress Up for school even improves academic If you are in the mood to look good Wednesday lives on thanks to Tyler performance, hence the idea behind and get some serious compliments, Wednesday is on its way. Seaman and his friends.” Jake invites school uniforms. One of the best parts of the anyone brave enough to take on the challenge of breaking away from the tradition is that there are no rules to
lhs sports
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Varsity soccer nothing short of spectacular Both boys and girls team celebrate productive seasons as they dominate their foes.
jack herman sports editor
selves in the game.” ity has led them to the number two Although the girl’s season ranking on ESPN’s high school soccer rankings. What is so impressive about ended rather abruptly after a quick With Lassiter featuring illustri- this year’s ous sports programs, one that is often Trojans is that wrongfully overlooked is the yearly they have no dominance of our varsity soccer glaring weakteams. Fueled by a need for perfecnesses. Both tion, both the boys and girls teams offensively and had seasons that are nothing short of defensively the fantastic. Trojans refuse After a brilliant season that to give their saw the boys go an astounding 17opposition a 0-1, outscoring their opponents to the break. tune of 91 goals to 12 goal allowed, Armed the Trojans continue to dismantle with a comtheir opponents as they beat their bination of first three playoff opponents by the senior, junior, scores of 5-2, 3-0, and 10-0, respecand sophotively. Goalie Jon Stoll (11) added, more talent, “We really go out to every game with the Trojans smugmug.com the mentality that we have to play our possess a The girls team pauses for an inspirational Pep Talk hardest, no matter the opponent. We plethora of speech before the hit the field. believe every game is a must win and options and that we need to go all out.” exit at the hands of Mill Creek in a depth that cannot be matched. Stoll This do or die attitude has 1-0 defeat, the season was not one went on to add, “Top to bottom we gotten them plenty of recognition. to frown upon. After cruising to a 5-1 all feel like we have the personnel to In fact, Lassiter’s hardnosed mentalregion record and a 10-6-1 record compete with anyone and keep our-
overall, the Lady Trojans proved that they’re more than capable of hanging with anyone in state. Their 10-6-1 record is even more impressive when you consider that all of their losses were by one goal thus proving that with a break here or there, we could be talking about a team that had just as good as season as the boys. That being said, the girls proved to be a strong unit as they outscored their opponents 35 to 18 during the regular season. But if you were to attribute their ability to play with any team to something, it would have to lean towards the senior leadership. Of the 19 varsity girl soccer players, 10 were seniors. As the boys continue their dash to state, the Trojan community needs to take a step back and admire our truly amazing teams this year. Not only did they play with tenacity, but they always played with a chip on their shoulder trying to prove that they were the best in state.
Did
You Know? The boys varsity soccer team’s strong season has landed them the number three national ranking for ESPN high school top soccer teams.
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No shortage of upsets in NCAA
(11) Marquette beats (6) Xavier 66eric ankerholz 55 staff writer
(12) Richmond beats (5)Vanderbilt 69-66 (13) Morehead St. beats (4) Louisville 62-61 (11) VCU beats (6) Georgetown 74-56 (11) Gonzaga beats (6) St. John’s 86-71
Biggest Upsets (8) Butler beats (1) Pittsburgh 71-70 (10) Florida St. beats (2) Notre Dame 71-57 (11) VCU beats (1) Kansas 71-61 (8) Butler beats (4) Wisconsin 61-54 (5) Arizona beats (1) Duke 93-77 (11) Marquette beats (3) Syracuse 66-62
“George Mason” of the tournament. Although VCU had a good run, Butler defeated them and moved on to play Connecticut in the Championship.
led to a very uninteresting game. Butler shot 18.8% and put up a measly 41 points. Although Connecticut struggled too, Kemba Walker was able to
March Madness certainly lived up to its name this year. No number one seeds made it to the Final Four. In fact, only two out of more than 5.9 million brackets entered into ESPN’s Tournament Challenge correctly picked all of the teams in the Final Four. The Final Four consisted of Kentucky (4 seed), Connecticut (3 seed), Virginia Commonwealth (11 seed), and Butler (8 seed). In this year’s NCAA tournament, four more teams were added. This increased the number of teams in the tournament from 64 to 68. The last four teams to make it into the tournament would have to win a play-in against jn.com . just to make it into the The party was on once the buzzer went off indicating original start of the Celebration Kentucky’s victory. tournament, the round of 64. Many critics When the buzzer sounded in push them through to a 53-41 victory. thought that these extra four teams the final game of the NCAA tourna- The Huskies were a combined 16-0 in would never have a chance. VCU proved the critics wrong and they shocked ment, it was Jim Calhoun and the Con- the three tournaments they played in necticut Huskies who were celebrat- this season (Maui Invitational, Big East the basketball world when they ing. Butler, led by Coach Brad Tournament, and NCAA Tournament). won five games and made This year’s tournament was Stevens, made an impressive run it all the way to the Final to the Championship game for very exciting with many upsets and Four. Virginia commonthe second straight year, only to some Cinderella stories. Although w e a l t h was certainly these upsets destroyed many people’s come up short again. this year’s This year’s chances of winning their pools, it was title game still entertaining to watch. Ryan Harwas possibly ris (11) said, “My bracket was messed the most bor- up from the start. But the games for ing game in the most part were to entertainChampionship ing to be upset with. Hopefully next history. Junior year the tournament will run more Spencer Roush smoothly.”With that being said we can said, “I wasn’t en- all agree that even if the teams that tertained at all. were projected to win didn’t win , the Neither team uniquness of the teams that won is seemed solid nothing short of amazing. Those amazfundamentaly ing games that left us in owe are small and the shoot- reminders of why we love the NCAA ing was dismal.” tournament. Its lack of scoring and sloppy play
lhs sports
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Lassiter golf refuses to shy away from limelight
colleen purdy features editor
would be in this situation to win the re The Lassiter Trojans men’s gion championship golf team made school history, with a for my team,” said first-ever Region 5-AAAAA ChampionBaukenert ship win at Cobblestone Golf Course, To get into the against a neighbor and golf powerplayoff, Lassiter used house, Walton. Weyrick’s 75, Toler’s At the 2010 tryouts, four 77, Wright’s 78 and then-freshmen caught Coach Butch Judd’s 80, to tie WalBurden’s eye – Brody Judd, Parker ton with a 310 total. Usry, Max Weyrick, and Adam Wright. Sophomore Brody Today’s team, led by junior Michael Judd said, “It feels Toler, includes those four sophogreat to finally put mores, as well as 2011 newcomers the Lassiter Trojans Bart Baukenert and Kevin Nichols. on the map in golf . courtesy of debbie judd by winning regionals Play began that morning at about 9 am. It ended about 10 hours Teamwork The golf team is a close knit group. for the first time in and 22 holes later, in a playoff with Lassiter’s history.” Walton, and with an unlikely team Adam Wright also hero, newcomer Bart Baukenert. He in the playoff, and Baukenert, remind- stated, “Just the sound of ‘Region shot 101 in regulation play. Since ed by his teammates that he could champs’ makes me smile every time. I the top four scores (out of six play- make a difference, drained a 15-foot can’t remember having a greater feelers) count, his regulation play score putt over a slope to clinch the title for ing than when Bart made that putt. It didn’t. But the format was the same the Trojans.“I didn’t think at all that I was awesome how the whole team
contributed a little and how we will always be the first in school history. It’s unreal.” The team goes to state playoffs May 2. “Winning this title just builds on what we’re trying to accomplish,” coach Burden said. “Last year, we set the standard by winning our first tournament, and this year our goal was to make it to state. Winning region is just icing on the cake. We got contributions from all of the kids. It goes a long way when your No. 5 and 6 guys are still playing strong at the end to kind of put us over the hump and get us there. It’s an awesome win.” On Monday, May 2nd, the boys packed up and headed to Snellville to compete in the Georgia AAAAA State Championships at Summit Chase Country Club in Snellville, Georgia. They placed 8th out of 16 teams. Congrats on the Region win boys and good job at state!
Lassiter tennis serves up victories at state level natalie kieta editor-in-chief
match!” The boys team lost in the sec- this year. The team was very closely tion of the final result. Junior Connor ond round of state to Northview High knit this year and many juniors are al- Sova, though battling some injuries, School in another close match. ready making plans to visit the seniors maintained his dominance and took Senior Katie Cox explains, “Beout some when they When asked at the beginning of cause highly are at college the season for a we don’t next year. ranked prediction of how have opponents. However, far the team would any big Though there is still make it, Varsity girls’ names both teams a big part tennis coach Lisa on our are losing of the team Chase said, “I think team, no many sethat won’t we have a good one reniors, the be graduatchance at making it ally saw teams look ing and will to state playoffs. We us as a to remain be reading to have a solid shot at threat. strong courtesy of katie cox play next year. . 16-2, or maybe even . courtesy of katie cox Senior girls pose for a picture with for next 17-1.” Dr Brown, Some of the boys sit and cheer This sea- New addiSeniors Coach Chase on senior night. Support son, we year with tions to the coach of the varsity on their fellow teammates. proved a stacked team Natalie boys’ team, preto everyone, including ourselves, that lineup of many talented players. Eldredge and Rachel Sumner proved dicted “I think we have an excellent we are As the girls huddled together after this year that though shot at two in the region and the off serious their loss to Norcoss, Coach Chase they may be freshchance of beating Walton.” compespoke words of inspiration, truth, and man, they mean busiThough neither of those predictition.” ness out on the tennis comfort: “At the beginning of the seations came true, both teams made it With son, not even the girls thought they court. Junior Amanda farther than most people would have many were on a winning team. Throughout Sumner, certainly expected. The girls made it to the graduproved that she was in the course of this spring, they proved third round of state playoffs, upsetating to all the other schools that they were it to win it, no matting former state finalist Centennial seniors, tough competition. Most importantly, ter how long it takes. High School on the way, until losing the they proved it to themselves.” ConOftentimes, it would to Norcross High School. Each of the team gratulations to the boys and girls . courtesy of katie cox come down to her five matches were very close and will be tennis teams on a great season and match for the deciding girls stands together to many went to a third set. Looking on Team Effort The saying a reminder that “it isn’t over until it’s celebrate their success. victory, giving many the bright side, Jenny Dunn remarks, over.” team-members heart “At least we won’t have to change the goodbye to many of its most valued players attacks as they watched in anticipaday of the banquet to play another
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An art of punrealistic proportion This article is pun for all ages
tyler molinaro editor-in-chief All Puns Intended: As we all know, humor is an art. It requires effort, timing, and a certain flair that is all too hard to come by. But there is one kind of humor that, in my book (which for somwe reason is named Mark), that trumps (Donald, of course) all. This, naturally, is the time-honored art of puns. Most people brush by puns without even recognizing they are there, painting over what is clearly in front of them, sculpting their humor out of other, less witty forms of comedy without even canvassing the possibilities that puns present. Put quite simply, my favorite form of comedy has become the punching bag of humor, punted away in favor of the likes of knockknock jokes. There is too little punishment in this world simply because there are too few punks to administer it. For instance, if my next line were to be “Voltaire refuted the charge that he ever wired money to President-elect Rissity in the current issue of Cell Mates; accusation source revealed to be his
conductor”, would the light bulb go off in your head? Did it? I maintain that puns are the purest, lightest form of humor. And yes, I will dispense with the current battery of light-hearted puns. They are subtle enough that they require wit and quickness on the part of the punk and recognition skills on the
side of the person being punished (or punched, as the case may be). But the greatest thing about puns is that they can come from or relate to almost any
Dear Yoga Pants,
We understand the message, but not why you aim to depress us. Sincerely, Great Stickers Though
will morris/comedy editor
is going to be a whale of a good time… Some think that puns are just for old blowhards, but that’s not true. It’s
easy enough, but a good pun is no fluke. It’s a process. First, you have to recognize you’ve been set up for one. Then you go in for the krill. Now, no baleen me out here, I need to FINish. Look out the nearest window. See, world! Wow, I’m just spouting them off now. What kind of shamoo did you use this morning? There we go, I’m done, over the hump, back to normal. If you still think there’s something fishy about puns, stop your blubbering. If you are starting to appreciate them, you’re whalecome. Literally anything can be made into a form of a pun or wordplay. Think I’m being crafty? To that I would ask which craft? See, it doesn’t even have to make real sense. In all seriousness, though, I ask that everyone who has groaned at least once during the course of this article try to make one pun today. It may not be rewarding the first time. You are liable to be met with confused stares and the occasional shaking head. People may not understand. They may be disappointed that you have “stooped” to puns as a form of humor. But you will know the truth. You will feel the rush of executing the perfect form of humor at the perfect time. You will be an artist. And it will be punreal.
Dear blank , please blank
, Dear “Put It Down” Signs,
situation or anything imaginable. I’ll prove it. I just asked a willing participant beside me to say the first animal that came to their mind. This
You’re awesome. Love, Guys
Dear Al Gore, If you’re having trouble convincing people about your global warming theory, just send them to Lassiter. Trust me, they’ll be believers in no time. Sincerely, Three Layers On Top, Shorts On Bottom
Dear Scrolling Cafeteria Sign, What purpose do you serve? All I’ve seen you do is welcome us to the “Café”. Sincerely, We Really Spent Money On That?
Dear Lassiter Student Body, We’ve done it! We broke the record for most times a student body can complain about how tired they are. We should be so proud. Sincerely, Call Guinness
Did
You Know? The music video for Rebecca Black’s hit single “Friday” took twelve hours to shoot and was shot at her father’s house.
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An official look at teachers’ summers julia lebow staff writer Teachers, also identified as professors, instructors, and torturers, are most known for their active predatory life from early fall to late spring. What we are exploring today is what happens when teachers are removed from their natural habitat, a sunless, colorless place with plenty of prey for the teacher population, and forced for the two months of summer vacation to be in a habitat of genuine sunlight and happiness for students. Because the species is so adverse to children’s joy, the natural choice is a two-month hibernation period. Though the exact location of the teachers’ den is not known, it is suspected that they travel far north to once again enjoy the cold tem-
peratures that chill their classrooms and weaken their students’ spirits during the school year. It may sound like an
Concealment
arduous journey; however, their tales of teenage spirits being slowly crushed under the boulders that are our edu-
cation system keep all the hibernating teachers delighted and giddy for the many miles of travel. Once the den is reached the teachers cover themselves in blankets of failed assignment nicely decorated with polka dots, which were recently discovered to actually be the dried tears of students past. After the teachers are bundled up and ready for deep sleep they are filled with an unbreakable sense of woe. Though they can sleep through it, the teachers are still kept from the desecration of student moral for two months. The only thing that keeps them alive is hope. Hope that one day soon they will once again be stomping on the cheer and whimsicality of all students. With this thought their eyes close dreamily, a casual smile spreads across their faces and the teachers slip into Ms. Webb and Senorita Allen practice their camoflauge a delicious sleep. skills as they prepare for summer break.
“Kickin’ in the front seat, sittin’ in the back seat, gotta make up my mind, which seat can I take?”
julia lebow staff writer As many of the students at Lassiter High School know, teen sensation Rebecca Black has recently debuted with her new song and music video “Friday.” In her music video you can find Rebecca and her friends in a convertible being driven by a 13 year old boy. They all appear to be attractive and happy middle schoolers taking a midnight drive in front of a green
screen disguised as the back drop of New York City. Rebecca’s song has been receiving a lot of criticism ever since it came out mostly because people be-
ics to be shallow and her voice to be overly auto tuned. What most people do not real-
Y A D FRI
ize is that Rebecca actually is a lyrical genius. Though her song “Friday” may seem meaningless and redundant, it is in reality about JFK’s assassination. You may find yourself questioning this theory but the proof is right there skillfully hidden in Rebecca’s lyrics. JFK was assassinated on a Friday; as he was shot the secret service yelled at Jackie Kennedy to “get down.” One of Rebecca’s most repeated lines is “Friday, lieve Friday, gotta get the lyr- down on Friday.” Coincidence? I think not. Still not convinced? The driver of the car that JFK was assassinated in was named Samuel Kickin. Another one of Rebecca’s
FRID AY
lines in her song is “kickin’ in the front seat, sittin’ in the back seat.” Rebecca also references the Cold War and the spread of Communism in her song when she says “Everybody’s rushin’” which sounds very familiar to “everybody’s Russian.” In the beginning of her song, Rebecca repeatedly states that she has to catch her bus. The Monday after JFK’s assassination, he was supposed to sign a bill into law requiring all public schools to provide public transportation to their students. I know what you’re thinking. Rebecca Black? Political song writer? It may come as a shock to many of you. Perhaps the next time Rebecca Black comes on your radio you should turn it up a bit and really scrutinize what she has to say. If you don’t, you may get lost in the poppy beat and miss Rebecca’s political allusions.
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Y A ID
AP P C
U RS G U D AP Government
This class requires ample reading but if you read, you will get an A. The tests are very relevent to the reading. It also involves a lot of fact-cramming, (138 court cases and the famous Faces test makes for much memorization).
AP World History
The key to surviving the Lyon’s den is simple: do your reading. Reading quizzes will provide motivation to crack open the book each night, as will Ms. Lyons’s loud and very convincing voice that she is not afraid to use to coax you into submission. She will drag you kicking and screaming to success on the AP exam. A final word to the wise: beware of Ms. Lyons on days of fire drills.
AP Economics
If you pay attention in class and do your homework (which typically consists of managable assignments in the workbook) you will get an A. Don’t overanalyze the material or you might confuse yourself trying to evaluate theories that can’t actually happen.
AP Chemistry
This is a difficult class and although there is not a vast amount of assigned homework, it is vital to ones success to work additional problems and go beyond the basic requirements. Working problems correctly and in a timely manner can be stressful but once mastered, the class and the tests will get easier. Take this class only if you are willing to put forth hard work and have plenty of self-discipline.
AP Language
This class holds fairly true to the standard language arts curriculum of reading, writing, and doing vocab on Fridays. That is, until the end of the year when all of a sudden you start vigorously preparing for the AP Exam. It’s easy to do well in the class by simply doing all the work, which isn’t too demanding, especially since students tend to enjoy the majority of the books that are assigned.
AP Environmental Science
As far an AP science classes go, this is definitely one of the easier options. It’s interesting because it’s so relevant to what is currently going on in the world. There isn’t too much homework or reading and the teacher prints out lecture guides that serve as notes.
AP Physics
Don’t take this class if you don’t like physics. Be prepared to prepare yourself for tests- the class requires substantial individual work. However, the teacher is very likeable and will work with you if you need extra help. Homework is optional but strongly recommended, as doing it helps immensely.
APUSH
This class is the Wright choice. The atmosphere is much more relaxed than AP World History. There are no reading quizzes, no vocabulary quizzes, and no check point grades. There are tests and it is up to you and you alone to finish the reading on time. Some will revel in the tranquility while others will flounder due to a lack of self-discipline. Coach Wright makes the history come alive with entertaining stories and charismatic impersonations.
AP Biology
This is rumored to be the most difficult science class at Lassiter. While it does require a lot of reading and memorization, the class is doable if you have the self discipline of a samurai. Plus, Ms. Adams’s perpetually convivial attitude almost manages to make memorizing the 5,000 steps of cellular respiration fun. Almost.