Living Well Magazine May 2019

MAY 2019

LIVING WELL MAGAZINE™

SECOND CHANCES AND SILVER LININGS: 5 THINGS I LEARNED FROM BEATING CANCER TAKING A COUPLE’S MENTAL HEALTH DAY

IS THERE A LINK BETWEEN THE CHEMICALS IN HAIR DYES AND CANCER? ODONTOPHOBIA AND HORTICULTURE THERAPY

Gifts for HEALTH + HOME + FOOD + TECH + STYLE recycle: share this magazine

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words from the editor and publisher:

Barbeques, ball games, backyards, and beers. All things that populate our headspace as winter thaws and summer nears. We are ready!

But there is another “B”-word that we want our readers to think about this month: Breast Cancer Survivor. Each May, LWM honors a Breast Cancer Survivor. This month we are honoring Meryl B. Lowell, who shares with us her article “Second Chances and Silver Linings: 5 Things I Learned from Beating Cancer.” She is a brave woman, who provides insight into what it’s like to beat cancer. We thank her for sharing her experience with the LWM community.

This issue also has some insightful information about the link between hair dyes and cancer. We hope you will take it under consideration, and decide for yourself whether blonde tips are worth the risk based on what the science tells us.

On a lighter note, Travel Host Linda Cooper leaves us dreaming about the white-sandy beaches and clear-blue waters of the Caribbean. Maybe that’s the go-to mother’s day gift. But if that’s too much, this issue is filled with other recommendations for mom. Bottom line: be thoughtful about what means the most to her—our guess: quality time with family.

Summer on the east coast is a whirlwind. Weekends are jam packed with birthday parties, getaways, BBQs, reunions, you name it. Before that summer fun reaches full swing, however, we encourage LWM readers to think about their mental health, and even dedicate a day off to it. This issue has a great piece about how couples should take mental health days to strengthen their relationships.

Be sure to follow LWM on Instagram @livingwellmagazine for fun photographs of puppies, kitties, information from our advertising partners, and much more!

Enjoy a delicious recipe this month from Andrew Thorne, Executive Chef, Home Grown Cafe, Lamb Stuffed Shiitake Mushrooms, and recipes from the Best Selling Author, Steven Raichlen, from the newly released cookbook, The Brisket Chronicles.

Want some help celebrating Cinco de Mayo on May 5? Visit the www.livingwellmagazine.net for some of the best margarita recipes ever!

May The Fourth Be With You —Enjoy & Share Everything! Diane Strauss

Open your heart and home to...Tyrone

Advertising Inquiries:

Editor / Publisher Diane Strauss Associate Editor: Michael Strauss puppy love™ Creator Sean Strauss Media Development Jonelle Strauss Resident Artist and Creator of the Valentino caricature.

Liam McWilliams Design and Graphics Diane Strauss

CONTACT US: sales@livingwellmagazine.net

302-355-0929

VOLUME 15 NUMBER 5

puppylove™

www.livingwellmagazine.net LIVING.WELL MAGAZINE© is a monthly publication distributed regionally. All articles and advertisements are accepted in good faith.

Living Well Magazine assumes no responsibility or liability for any claims, conditions, products, services, errors, and/or opinions expressed through articles and advertisements appearing in this publication. Please check with your primary health care provider before making any changes. Living Well Magazine welcomes your comments and suggestions. No part of LIVING WELL MAGAZINE™ may be reproduced in any form without permission and written consent. Copyright, All rights reserved. 2018 Various Trademarks used

By Permission of Their resPecTiVe owners

Tyrone Thirteen-year-old Tyrone lost the only home he knew when his owner passed away. He was pretty overwhelmed at first but has been opening up to staff and getting to know the other kitties in the free roaming cat room. He’s a sweet boy looking for a break in life. Who has a quiet spot to give Tyrone the love he deserves in his golden years? (Brandywine Valley SPCA, 600 South Street, New Castle, DE 19720, 302-516-1000, www.bvspca.org)

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May 2019

LIVING.WELL MAGAZINE (ISSN 2325-2448) published monthly by Savendale Media Group, 1519 Old Coach Road Newark, Delaware 19711 Phone:302-355-0929 Fax:302-454-1867 www.livingwellmagazine.net

Cover Design: by dcstrauss For more content, photos, and special give-aways you can find and follow us on most social media forums.

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inside Come to Your Senses: Calm Your Mind Karen Verna Carlson No Test Required Suzanne E. Eder

Gifts for

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LIKE US ON FACEBOOK AND

Sexual Health and Healing: Taking a Couple’s Mental Health Day with Dianna Palimere

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EARTH TALK: Is there a link between the chemicals in Hair Dyes and Cancer?

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FOLLOW US ON TWITTER

Follow our Instagram page for an up close and personal look. www.instagram.com livingwellmagazine/

17 Lamb Stuffed Shiitake Mushrooms.

Recipe From Chef Andrew Thorne, The Executive Chef at Home Grown Cafe Odontophobia and Horticulture Therapy Dr. Andrew Swiatowicz,D.D.S

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How Outdoor Living Trends Affect the Sale of a House Madeline Dobbs

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“Gratitude Snapshots of Caribbean Dreaming” with Travel Host Linda Cooper

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Many of the items appearing in LWM can be found and purchased from local retailers.

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TRIED

Second Chances And Silver Linings: 5 Things I Learned From Beating Cancer Meryl B Lowell Why Breast Cancer Survivors Need Mammograms Mayo Clinic News Network

RECIPES BY THE BOOK: The Brisket Chronicles How to Barbecue, Braise, Smoke, and Cure the World’s Most Epic Cut of Meat

By Steven Raichlen Author of the New York Times Bestseller Project Smoke

TRUE™

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The prestigious— Living.Well Magazine Tried and True award is given only awarded to products and companies that we have used and can honestly say they were great! If it has the LWM Tried and True Award on it, we are sure that you will too.

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FYI

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AWARD

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AGAZIN ™ E

&

LL M WE

LIVIN G.

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Is there a Link between the Chemicals in Hair Dyes and Cancer?

The short answer is...maybe. Scientists have found links between certain types of cancer and repeated exposure to so-called “permanent” hair dyes (that is, the kind you would get in the hair salon that would stay put until the hair is replaced by new growth).

These dyes contain a cocktail of potentially harmful substances, including formaldehyde (linked to cancer and fetal damage in utero), p-Phenylenediamine (lung and kidney problems, bladder cancer), DMDM Hydantoin (an immunotoxin restricted in other countries but not the U.S.), ammonia (respiratory problems and asthma), coal tar (a known carcinogen), resorcinol (a hormone disruptor) and eugenol (cancer, allergies, and immune and neurological issues). These dyes penetrate and bind with hair shafts; darker dyes require more of the potentially harmful coloring agents and are therefore more dangerous.

Three-quarters of adult women in the U.S. color their hair, but it’s the hair care workers, exposed to noxious chemicals daily, who are most at risk. According to the American Cancer Society (ACS), some studies have shown that hairdressers, stylists and barbers who work with these dyes do indeed have a slightly elevated risk of developing bladder cancer, leukemia or non-Hodgkin lymphoma, while others proved inconclusive.

If working with hair is your job, you might want to consider limiting your exposure to permanent hair dyes, or at least look for and offer safer alternatives, even if they don’t last as long.

A good place to start is the “Hair Color & Bleaching” section of the free online Skin Deep database, launched in 2004 by the non-profit Environmental Working Group (EWG) to provide information on 6

the ingredients of common household cleaning and health and beauty products and to highlight potential hazards and health concerns. The database contains listings for hundreds of hair color products, both for at-home use and in salons, that won’t make you sick. Some favorite allnatural, non-toxic brands to try include EcoColors, Hairprint, Organic & Mineral, Logona, Good Dye Young and Naturigin.

According to Nicole Cothrun Venables, a Hollywood-based stylist, there are many all-natural ways to enhance, brighten or alter your existing hair color without subjecting your locks to carcinogenic chemicals. “Fruit, vegetable, and herb restorative color cocktails are excellent rinses that can be applied once per week to refresh your color,” she reports. “Tea, coffee and wine hair stains are also gentle ways to add subtle hints of opaque color, depth, highlights and shine.” Check out her DIY hair color treatment recipes and techniques in her Huff Post article “7 Non-Toxic Solutions to Healthy Hair Color.”

Another way to avoid potentially dangerous hair color treatments is to just get over your misplaced vanity and accept your natural hair color even if it’s gray as a beautiful expression of who you are and what you stand for in the increasingly manicured, colorized and fabricated world we now inhabit.

CONTACTS: ACS’s “Hair Dye,” cancer.org/cancer/cancer-causes/hair-dyes.html; EWG, ewg.org/skindeep/browse/hair+color+and+bleaching/; EcoColors, www. ecocolors.net; Hairprint, www.myhairprint.com; Organic & Mineral, originalmineral. com/cct-color/; Logona, logona.de/de/haare/pflanzen-haarfarben.html; Sante, sante. de/en/hair/herbal-hair-colors.html; Good Dye Young, gooddyeyoung.com/#colors; Naturigin, naturigin.com/natural-hair-colours/; Huff Post, www.huffpost.com/entry/ nontoxic-hair-dye_b_1005188.

EarthTalk® is produced by Roddy Scheer & Doug Moss for the 501(c)3 nonprofit EarthTalk. To donate, visit www.earthtalk.org. Send questions to: question@earthtalk.org.

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May 2019

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FYI

YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHAT THE CHEMICALS IN SUNSCREENS CAN DO...

The chemistry of sunscreen is under scrutiny by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA), which has proposed updated regulations for a product routinely used by American consumers. according to two Rice University synthetic organic chemists.

Two Rice University discuss the science behind sunscreens and the FDA's plan to bring those products up to date.

László Kürti, an associate professor of chemistry whose lab designs sophisticated molecular building blocks that simplify drug design, said the FDA study is warranted.

"It doesn't mean they are banned," Zhou said. "It just means they need more data to determine whether they should be on the list."

Hawaii, and Key West, Florida, have already banned sunscreens with two chemicals, oxybenzone and octinoxate, suspected of harming coral reefs.

Kürti said testing each organic molecule in sunscreens according to the same vigorous standard that pharmaceutical companies analyze prescription drugs for FDA approval would be prohibitively expensive.

"Sunscreen is extremely effective," he said. "As a person who likes to go to the beach, I know what happens when I don't use it, and I don't think we should doubt the resolve of manufacturers to protect consumers.

"The question is the risk-to-benefit ratio," Kürti said. "The FDA has to think about the chemical ingredients that may interfere with human enzymes and hormones and the potential to trigger side effects. And, of course, like the chemical compounds in other consumer products, the chemicals in sunscreen also end up in the environment."

The potential risk, he said, comes not from the minerals zinc oxide and titanium oxide that give sunscreen its basic properties, but from the organic chemical compounds that provide extra protection by blocking specific wavelengths of UV light and could be absorbed through the skin.

In the proposed rules, only the two minerals are now considered "generally recognized as safe and effective," or in FDA terminology, GRASE. "Technically, all new drugs have to go through FDA approval, but there are many chemical compounds, some used since the 18th century, that have shown no ill effect at all," said Zhe Zhou, a postdoctoral researcher in Kürti's lab. "Those are 'grandfathered in' and considered generally accepted as safe because of empirical evidence."

"The sun bombards us with ultraviolet, visible and infrared light," he said. "These organic molecules have chromophores that absorb certain wavelengths on the electromagnetic spectrum, and with the right combination, they filter out most of the harmful rays.

"If the FDA required the full analysis of these compounds' effects, I think sunscreen would become unaffordable," Kürti said. "You would need a prescription for sunscreen, and you would be paying 300 bucks a bottle. Then we would be really harming people."

Source:Kürti Research Group: http://kurtilabs.com Rice Department of Chemistry: https://chemistry.rice.edu

The FDA proposes to remove GRASE status for two organic chemicals, PABA and trolamine salicylate, while studying the other 12 chemicals found in many sunscreens.

CBD can have an interaction with certain drugs in a manner that is similar to grapefruit. Research has shown that certain compounds in grapefruit can interact with many common pharmaceutical drugs by inhibiting cytochrome P450 enzymes, a family of liver enzymes that metabolizes these drugs. However, CBD can also inhibit these enzymes when consumed at high enough dosages.

During the month of May, Major League Lacrosse will face off in the Real Men Wear Pink Challenge benefiting the American Cancer Society in the fight against breast cancer. ... The top fundraisers on each team will earn exclusive swag and the top MLL player will be crowned the 2018 Real Man of Major League Lacrosse.

The traditional Real Men Wear Pink program was created by the American Cancer Society to give men a greater presence in the fight against breast cancer.

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We always recommend checking with your physician before starting a new dietary supplement program. Any instructions you may have received from a medical professional regarding grapefruit should be treated with the same level of care when it comes to CBD products.

Source: Lazarus Naturals

May 2019

How Outdoor Living Trends Affect the Sale of a House Madeline Dobbs

Madeline’s Top 3 Outdoor Living Trends You Should Know

Home buyers form an emotional connection to homes that feature current trends and can increase the likelihood of a buyer making an offer. According to a recent study about “Popularity of Special-Function Rooms among Today’s Homeowners”,* an outdoor “Living Room” (or space) is at the top of the list followed by Mud Rooms, which may be no coincidence.

So, how does a home seller take advantage of this information when selling? In my experience, the answer is to embrace outdoor living-space trend when possible to net the most buyers and highest sales price. Here are a few examples of what buyers are looking for this season:

1. Front Porch Living: The nostalgia of the front porch has captured the hearts of many who are looking to be a part of a neighborhood. Creating space with a few chairs and a table for a shared cup of coffee or wine is a great way to embrace this trend. Buyer’s also think about holidays like Halloween and decorating the front porch or lawn for the local trick or treaters. The picture shown is of my front porch addition. We use it all the time when people stop over. I enjoy changing the style just like an interior room.

2.Fire Pit Passion: Almost every first-time buyer I meet is looking for the best space for a fire pit.

When a house already has one, regardless of whether it’s fancy or not, their eyes light up. Sellers can embrace this one by investing in a simple firepit and putting a few chairs around it. Another seller tip is to invest in trendy string lights. Leave the lights on (even if it’s not too dark.)

3.Fences for Furry Friends (AKA: Dogs): If you are fortunate to have a fence of any kind, in average or above condition, a home buyer may choose your house over a similar one. The reason is because our precious pups are driving millennials out of the city and into the ‘burbs so that they can run around and everyone can hang out in the backyard without worry. If you don’t believe me, ask anyone with a dog! The cost of fencing is expensive. Having a fence immediately reduces the expenses for the next homeowner.

Popularity of special-function rooms Among today’s homeowners 56%

Outdoor Living

Home Offices

29%

In-law Suite Pet Room/ Interior kennel

70%

38% 36%

Mud Room

22% 20%

4%

35%

33%

2018 2019

In the June Issue:

Source: American Institute of Artitects 2 Qtr. “Home Design Trends Survey”

If you are thinking of selling in spring or summer, it’s a great idea to add trendy touches like herb gardens and corn hole games. If you own a pool, I have good news- younger buyers are happy to have a pool that they can also enjoy with their dogs! These trends may also inspire you if you will be attending a summer wedding or house warming party. Outdoor living is so 2019!

How to be your own

Home Inspector The Ugly Truth about Selling a House

*Source:American Institute of Architects

Madeline Dobbs is the Founder of More BV Homes, a concierge real

MadelineDobbs, Realtor

estate business, serving friends in the Brandywine Valley of DE & PA.

302.798.1000 x 3104 moremadelinedobbs@gmail.com www.moreBVhomes.com

Self-described as the love-child of legendary Interior

Designer Dorothy Draper and Mad Men character Don Draper, she is also the biological child of two Realtors. She is the author of 21 Tips to Sell Your Home and “How to Sell a House

Morebvhomes Morebvhomes

in 30 Days!”

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May 2019

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ALENTINO!

Wow! There are thousands of readers who are searching for Valentino.

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He is hidden somewhere on the pages of each issue.

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We hope you have fun looking and will continue your quest to find Valentino. When you find him please email us at:

Email or Call—

info@livingwellmagazine.net [Please type “Valentino” on the

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subject line — keep searching and entering the “Where’s Valentino!”

Contest every month for a chance to be entered to win some great gifts from our Holiday Gift Guide!

Below Is The Answer To Last Month’s Where’s Valentino!

In April, Valentino can be found on page 3, on the “From the Ground Up“ ad! Valentino loves laying in the grass and prefers PetSafe, KidSafe lawns. Remember Valentino is always hiding in one of our advertisers ads. Please make sure we have your mailing address & Phone Number included in your email. Because if you are a winner we can send out your prize! If you need a hint you can always email us and ask:

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Second Chances and Silver Linings: 5 Things I Learned from Beating Cancer Meryl B Lowell

have a fear of heights, yet in the past year have jumped out of an airplane, learned to rock climb, flown in a helicopter, and paraglided. Each time I overcome my fears, I feel exhilarated.

A few years ago, I was introduced to a form of meditation called Yoga Nidra. It is an ancient meditation tradition from India, which incorporates a specific sequence of mindfulness techniques that profoundly relax the body and quiets the mind. It is very effective and user friendly. When practicing it, one simply lays down as comfortably as possible and follows the directions given by a trained Yoga Nidra facilitator. I loved the technique so much that I got certified as an Advanced Level facilitator at the Amrit Yoga Institute in Salt Springs, Florida.

“If you have cancer get a horse,” came the words in November, 2004. As you might imagine, the words got my attention, but with the holidays coming, I set them aside. Shortly thereafter, I noticed a very small lump near my right breast, which I dismissed as probably a cyst caused by drinking coffee. Besides, I had my annual mammogram scheduled for January.

The holidays came and went, as did my mammogram. Nothing abnormal showed up. A month later, I went on vacation with my oldest friend, and shared with her how the words had come to me and about my mammogram. She encouraged me to make an appointment with my gynecologist to get checked out one more time. I did, and the doctor ordered a biopsy of the lump, just to be safe. The day before my 43rd birthday, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. A whirlwind of appointments ensued, after it was determined that I had a very rare form (less than one percent of women with breast cancer have my type).

I wouldn’t wish cancer and its treatments on anyone, but for me, it was the wake up call I needed to truly participate in and celebrate life. I had suffered from depression for a number of years, yet when faced with the possibility of death, I chose to live I wanted to stay alive to raise my two daughters. I began to read books about spirituality and healing.

Throughout my chemotherapy and radiation treatments, I listened to soothing guided meditations, which conjured healing images and positive feelings. I began to meditate. I started listening to my inner voice and honoring the “yeses” and “noes” as I became aware of them.

One of the first things I did after my treatments, was to go on a zip line.

I was terrified but wanted to be a good role model for my daughters, so I did it anyway. I loved it! Looking back, I think that was the beginning of trying things that scared me, and not allowing my fears to stop me in life.

Last winter, my yoga teacher trainer put words to it that I could relate to.

He said that most of us are trying to maintain a small “circle of serenity,” struggling to keep out people and ideas and activities that scare us, in order to feel comfortable. He suggested that our power lies in expanding our circle of serenity. I use many of the tools of yoga (mostly breath, concentration, self-study, and meditation) on a daily basis. My goal is to challenge myself and constantly try to expand my circle of serenity. I 12

Just over a year ago, I was in Phoenix for a few months to do a yoga teacher training. Throughout the program, I was constantly thinking about and trying to integrate the tools of yoga. One day while I was hiking, it occurred to me to incorporate the mindfulness techniques I had learned as a facilitator into a book for children. In March I published The Dolphin’s Secret: A Meditational Journey for Children. My hope is this book empowers children to experience peace, ease, and happiness through learning mindfulness techniques at a young age.

My takeaways from my bout with cancer are: 1. Trust your gut. On some level, my body knew there was a problem.

2. Take good care of yourself. Do the activities that nourish your body and soul.

3. Don’t take things for granted. Life can change in the blink of an eye.

4. Find a way to be brave. It’s okay to have the fear—And, do it anyway!

5. Follow your passions. Do something that is meaningful to you.

I view the years I’ve been given since being diagnosed with cancer as a special gift. I was given a second chance. I try to take nothing for granted.

The silver lining has been becoming aware of my relationship with my Higher Power and learning the tools of yoga to create a happier and more fulfilling life.

Meryl Best Lowell has been exploring and practicing different forms of meditation since 2005, when she was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive form of breast cancer. Lowell believes that Yoga Nidra makes meditation and deep relaxation accessible to everyone. She received her certification as an advanced level facilitator of Yoga Nidra at the Amrit Yoga Institute in Salt Springs, Florida in October of 2016. In the spring of 2018, Lowell was hiking in Arizona when she was inspired to write a series of children’s books, which incorporate the mindfulness techniques of Yoga Nidra. Her first book in the series, The Dolphin’s Secret: A Meditational Journey for Children, focuses on giving children a direct experience of meditation.

Lowell currently resides in South Lake Tahoe, California, with her Toy Australian Shepherd, Blaze. She credits the practices of Yoga and Yoga Nidra with giving her the inner resources to venture into rock climbing, skydiving and parasailing.

Connect with Meryl Best Lowell on Facebook @merylbestlowell and Instagram @merylbestlowell and visit www.merylbestlowell.com.

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May 2019

bvspca

2019 The Dolphin's Secret: A Meditational Journey for Children

by Meryl B Lowell Illustrated by Polina Hrytskova Meri, a beautiful mermaid, and her friend, Aloha, a dolphin, playfully introduce children to meditation. The story weaves in mindfulness techniques of Yoga Nidra, an ancient form of meditation, which will help children have a direct experience of peace and relaxation. Yoga Nidra is done laying down, so this is perfect for bedtime or naptime! Written for children ages 4-8 who enjoy story time. Parents and teachers who read the story and do the techniques will also experience relaxation while reading the story. Available on Amazon.com

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May 2019

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Why Breast Cancer Survivors Need Mammograms Deborah Balzer Breast cancer survivors are not getting the recommended number of mammograms following surgery, according to a recent study led by Dr. Kathryn Ruddy, a Mayo Clinic oncologist. The mammogram screening study found that one year after surgery, 13 percent of breast cancer survivors had not followed up with any breast imaging.

And only 50 percent of patients followed mammogram screening recommendations at least five years after surgery.

Getting an annual mammogram may be uncomfortable, but it also can save lives, including those of breast cancer survivors. Dr. Ruddy says the problem is many breast cancer survivors are not getting the recommended screenings – especially younger women and black women.

"Black women were less likely to have mammograms than white women.

This is a concern and may be contributing to the poorer prognoses we see in black women with breast cancer," says Dr. Ruddy.

Dr. Ruddy says clinicians need to help patients coordinate their tests better. And she hopes survivorship care plans may help improve the rate of mammograms, as well.

"These [survivorship care plans] are documents that describe for a patient at the end of cancer care what the diagnosis was, what were the treatments received, and what to do going forward," says Dr. Ruddy.

As uncomfortable as a mammogram might be, Dr. Ruddy wants breast cancer survivors to know, "If they have breast tissue left, it is really important that we both screen for recurrence and also look for new cancers.�

Source: Mayo Clinic News Network

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May 2019

Taking a Couple’s Mental Health Day

As I’m sure you may know, May is Mental Health Awareness month. Whether you’re single or partnered, taking time for your mental health is paramount to your overall health, happiness and wellbeing. However, if you are in a relationship, it’s even more important that the two of you schedule time off together to intentionally focus on quality time for relaxation, connection, and fun together. In my experience working with couples, one of the biggest mistakes they make is not being intentional enough about setting aside time to focus on the health of their relationship. Below are some tips for helping you to determine how and when to schedule a couple’s mental health day together.

For most people, there are never enough hours in the day or days in the week to get everything checked off of our to-do lists. And sadly, I don’t think that self-care (or relationship-care) make it onto the list at all! Perhaps this is because there’s a belief that we need to have several days off to fully relax and decompress from the stresses of regular, daily obligations. While we do need to take vacations from work and household responsibilities, it is also true that taking just one day off to solely focus on rest and rejuvenation can help to improve our health and happiness in the short-term. As noted by Wellness Coach Elizabeth Scott, “While one day might not solve heavy underlying problems that lead to burnout, a mental health day can provide a much-needed break to pause, regroup, and come back with greater levels of energy and a fresh, less-stressed perspective”( www.werywellmind.com, February, 2018). I suggest scheduling a day off together at least once every eight weeks, and certainly more often if it is possible.

There are some guidelines for the time taken off: First, the day is not to be used for chores, house projects, obligations, etc. This time is separate from your everyday lives and responsibilities and it to be used with the sole focus of stress relief, relaxation, connection, and fun. Second, it is scheduled and planned out in advance. Third, it is not shared with family or friends--it is time specifically and intentionally devoted to each other and the relationship.

In my experience, couples who schedule a day off from work together in the middle of the week are less likely to feel like they should be doing something for the kids, or home. If they have children, it’s even more beneficial to do it during the week, as the kids are in school so they don’t need to worry about finding anyone to care for them. After deciding on the day that works, next you’ll need to decide on what would have

the most benefit for your relationship. Different kinds of stress require different kinds of responses to manage that stress. If one of the biggest stressors for you is needing to slow down and relax together, then planning a day off that focuses on relaxing activities would be the best choice. For example, going for a walk outside in nature together, getting a massage, gentle yoga, meditation, and the like would be excellent ways to relax together. If one of your biggest stressors is needing to have more fun and excitement, I’d suggest activities that are more active and experiential. Both of you might make a list of things that you love doing or things you want to try and then refer to those lists for ideas when planning your mental health day off together. Finally, if you feel like the biggest stressor is feeling disconnected from each other, you might plan a day that really breaks you out of the daily routine, like going for a day trip somewhere together.

The most important aspect of planning your couple’s mental health day is that it is prioritized and “protected.” By protected, I mean that it is treated with the same respect as all things that you see as vitally important and valuable in your life. Once it is scheduled, short of an emergency, it does not get cancelled or rescheduled. In addition, it is also protected from outside influences, including limiting the use of smart phones, tablets, television and other electronics. Minimize outside distractions and focus your attention on yourself and your partner. Taking this time together will not only benefit your mental health but will ultimately improve the health and strength of your relationship.

Sexual Health and Healing with Dianna Palimere, PhD, LCSW Dr. Dianna Palimere is a Psychosexual Therapist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker. She has been working in the field of mental health for the past 18 years, dedicating the past 16 years to specializing in clinical sexuality. She holds a Bachelors degree in Psychology, a Masters degree in Social Work, a Masters degree in Human Sexuality Education, and a PhD in Clinical Human Sexuality. Utilizing a holistic approach to therapy, she incorporates a variety of clinical interventions in her work with individuals, couples, and families. She is devoted to helping people achieve sexual health and healing through her work as a psychotherapist in her private practice in Pike Creek, DE; as well as in her work with local nonprofit organizations. To learn more, visit her website: www.SexTherapyInDelaware.com Join her on Facebook, keywords: Sex Therapy in Delaware.

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May 2019

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Open Top Totes Use these boxy totes for everything from grocery trips to sports gear.

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May 2019

The Miracle Ball Method

by Elaine Petrone Relieve your pain Reshape your body Reduce your stress miracleballmethod.com

Silver Hair A Handbook Say Goodbye to the Dye and Let Your Natural Light Shine From the authors of the Bestselling Curly Girl: The Handbook Lorraine Massey with Michele Bender Amazon.com

Wide Tote

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May 2019

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“Gratitude Snapshots of Caribbean Dreaming”

by Travel Host Linda Cooper Dreaming“. I am so grateful for these priceless “travel snapshots” that left an indelible memory of each locale, both mentally and of course documented for my TV show.

I showcase twelve tropical bucket-list destinations on Season One, highlighting the essence and flavor each region has to offer.

Costa Rica stands out as a personal favorite with its iconic “Pura Vida” catchphrase meaning “Pure Life”, “To live life to the fullest” and that is definitely my mantra so it really resonated with me. With its sugary sand and warm turquoise water, breathtaking rainforests brimming with wildlife and warm friendly “Tico” culture, Costa Rica is an idyllic backdrop for the perfect vacation hotspot.

Located in the heart of Central America, nestled between the Pacific Ocean and the Caribbean Sea, its name Costa Rica means “rich coast” and is one of only five locations on the planet that have the Blue Zone

photo by Chuck Shanlever

I am not sure that many people know the incredible power of gratitude.

It’s a state of being that is essential to a life well lived. Both behavioral and psychological research has shown the incredible life improvements that can stem from the practice of gratitude makes people happier and more resilient, it strengthens relationships, it improves health, and it reduces stress.

I can attest having an attitude of gratitude has definitely raised my “happiness set-point” where I remain at a higher level of happiness regardless of outside circumstances.

phenomena where people live longer, healthier lives. Sign me up to retire here!

While filming the first season of my lifestyle travel series “Travel Time with Linda”, an overwhelming wave of thankfulness washed over me. It was a dream come true- hence the theme title; “Caribbean 18

So many incredible moments stand out, but our visit to Diamante’s Animal Sanctuary really was a once-in-a-lifetime experience getting up close and personal with Costa Rica’s finest. Diamante is Guancastes largest animal sanctuary and home to a wide variety of species. These rescue animals were donated by the Costa Rican Ministry of Wildlife and include sloths, toucans, monkeys, pumas, jaguars, and a worldclass butterfly observatory. As an animal lover, Diamante is pure magic~

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May 2019

It’s always hilarious working with wild animals trying to get them to perform “on cue” and filming a scene with the resident toucans were no exception. I almost got my hair trimmed compliments of my new friend which made for a wonderful impromptu camera magic moment.

You’re invited to join me in the passenger seat~ Season Two of “Travel Time with Linda” is airing now on AXS TV Network nationwide featuring “Bucket-List Destinations”. Set your DVR to watch weekly Sunday mornings 8am ET / 7am CST.

Also featured on “The Best of Caribbean Dreaming” show episode is the breathtaking country of Belize, one of the most amazing, adventure-packed places on Earth.

From exploring the wonders of the rainforest to snorkeling in Ambergris Caye, this locale offers a variety of extraordinary experiences.

Noted as a biodiversity hotspot with its distinctive ecosystems, Belize really packs a punch with its lush landscapes filled with wildlife, flora and fauna in its jungles and most revered spots for marine life in its coastal regions.

From swimming with nurse sharks at Holchan Marine Reserve in Ambergris Caye to exploring Big Rock Waterfall and Rio on Pools in the Cayo District, it’s an outdoor junkie’s paradise you’d better Belize it!

On my vision board is a quote that I see daily in big bold pink script, “Living in my little indestructible bubble of happiness”. It’s a message that I take seriously along with another affirmation on having an “Attitude of Gratitude”.

Try making it a habit to express thankfulness and appreciation in all parts of your life, on a regular basis, for both the big and small things alike. It’s my philosophy if you concentrate on what you have, you’ll always have more.

For an even more fully immersive experience….

Watch all the “Caribbean Dreaming” episodes from Season One “Travel Time with Linda” on Amazon Prime here~ I’m excited to share more travel inspiration with all of you on my national travel show! www.livingwellmagazine.net

Linda Cooper is an award-winning TV Host, Producer and Writer serving as a brand ambassador to worldwide travel on her national luxury lifestyle series “Travel Time with Linda” and as a contributor to several lifestyle and travel publications. Over the years, her specialty areas of focus include the travel, lifestyle, luxury, food/wine, fitness,and retail shopping. www.traveltimewithlindatv.com May 2019

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RECIPES BY THE BOOK

REAL DEAL HOLYFIELD BRISKET BREAKFAST TACOS When early morning hunger strikes in Austin, you head for a parking lot filled with sheds, trailers, barbecue pits, and sky-blue picnic tables clustered around a cinderblock roadhouse known as Valentina’s Tex Mex BBQ. Proprietor Miguel Vidal grew up in San Antonio, where his dad, like most Texans, staged family barbecues every weekend and his mom made the salsas and tortillas by hand. He worked at various restaurants in Austin prior to opening Valentina’s (named for his daughter) in 2013. “I wanted to elevate the Tex-Mex food I grew up on, while marrying it with Texas barbecue,” says Vidal, who runs the restaurant with his wife, Modesty, and brother, Elias. To this end, he built three massive barbecue pits (named Cobain, Cornell, and Maynard after his favorite musicians). He burns mesquite—not the post oak customary in these parts— resulting in meats with a decisive smoke flavor. His briskets (seasoned with a triple blast of spices, pepper, and salt) go on at 1 a.m. and cook for 14 to 16 hours. On a typical Saturday, he’ll serve 400 pounds of brisket, 200 pounds of pork ribs, and 1,500 housemade tortillas. One morning, Miguel’s father asked for some huevos rancheros. Miguel decided to up the ante, adding brisket and a smoked vegetable salsa. The result was the Real Deal Holyfield, and it delivers a wallop.

The Brisket Chronicles How to Barbecue, Braise, Smoke, and Cure the World’s Most Epic Cut of Meat

By Steven Raichlen Author of the New York Times Bestseller Project Smoke

Grill master Steven Raichlen shares more than 60 foolproof, mouthwatering recipes for preparing the tastiest, most versatile, and most beloved cut of meat in the world—outside on the grill, as well as in the kitchen.

Take brisket to the next level: ’Cue it, grill it, smoke it, braise it, cure it, boil it—even bake it into chocolate chip cookies. Texas barbecued brisket is just the beginning: There’s also Jamaican Jerk Brisket and Korean Grilled Brisket to savor. Old School Pastrami and Kung Pao Pastrami, a perfect Passover Brisket with Dried Fruits and Sweet Wine, even ground brisket—Jakes Double Brisket Cheeseburgers.

In dozens of unbeatable tips, Raichlen shows you just how to handle, prep, and store your meat for maximum tenderness and flavor. Plus plenty more recipes that are pure comfort food, perfect for using up leftovers: Brisket Hash, Brisket Baked Beans, Bacon-Grilled Brisket Bites—or for real mind-blowing pleasure, Kettle Corn with Burnt Ends. And side dishes that are the perfect brisket accents, including slaws, salads, and sauces.

Excerpted from The Brisket Chronicles: How to Barbecue, Braise, Smoke, and Cure the World’s Most Epic Cut of Meat by Steven Raichlen (Workman Publishing). Copyright © 2019. Photographs by Matthew Benson.”

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YIELD: Serves 4

INGREDIENTS

METHOD: Pan-frying

2 tablespoons butter, olive oil, or Brisket Butter (page 259), or as needed

PREP TIME: 20 minutes COOKING TIME: 20 minutes HEAT SOURCE: Stove YOU’LL ALSO NEED: A rimmed sheet pan WHAT ELSE: Like much Tex-Mex street food, the Real Deal Holyfield features commonplace ingredients— tortillas, eggs, potatoes, refried beans, and salsa— staples of Mexican American cooking. But it takes a little choreography to put them together for breakfast.

I’ve tried to streamline the recipe to the point where you can make it in a single frying pan. (You keep the various components warm on a rimmed sheet pan in the oven.) You’ll need some leftover barbecued brisket and a large cooked potato.

A purist would make the tortillas, refried beans, and salsa from scratch, but your favorite commercial versions deliver a pretty awesome breakfast, too. The recipe can be multiplied as you desire— given the setup, it’s easier (or at least more efficient) to make breakfast tacos for many people rather than just a few.

4 slices barbecued brisket (each slice 1/4 inch thick; about 1/2 pound total; see pages 41 to 70) 1 baked or boiled russet (baking) potato, cut into 1/4-inch dice (use whatever cooked potato you might have on hand) Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper 4 flour or white corn tortillas (each 6 inches in diameter) 4 large eggs (preferably farm-fresh and organic) 1 cup warm refried beans, canned or homemade 1 cup Gangsta Salsa (recipe follows), or your favorite salsa 1/4 cup thinly sliced scallion greens 1. Preheat the oven to 250°F. 2. Melt 1 tablespoon butter in a skillet over medium-high heat. Warm the brisket slices, about 30 seconds per side. Transfer to a rimmed sheet pan and keep warm in the oven. 3. Melt the remaining 1 tablespoon butter in the skillet. Add the potatoes and pan-fry, stirring with a spatula, until hot, browned, and crisp, 3 minutes. Season with salt and pepper. Transfer the potatoes to the sheet pan with the brisket and keep warm. 4. Warm the tortillas in the skillet, 30 seconds per side. (Alternatively, warm the tortillas on your grill.) Transfer to the sheet pan with the brisket and potatoes and keep warm. 5. You’ll need at least 2 tablespoons of fat in the skillet to fry the eggs. If enough butter remains in the skillet, heat it over a medium-high flame; if not, add butter, oil, or brisket butter to equal 2 tablespoons. When the fat starts sizzling, crack in the eggs. Fry until cooked to taste, 2 to 3 minutes on one side if you like them sunny-side up, or 2 minutes per side for over easy. 6. Assemble the tacos: Lay a tortilla on a plate. Spread it with a quarter of the refried beans. Top with a quarter of the fried potatoes and a slice of brisket. Slide an egg on top. Spoon salsa on top and sprinkle with a quarter of the scallion greens. Assemble the remaining tacos the same way. Serve the tacos open-face, with any remaining salsa on the side.

Recipe continued on next page.

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May 2019

GANGSTA SALSA YIELD: Makes 2 cups This pyrotechnic salsa shows how Miguel Vidal blends Tex-Mex with Hill Country barbecue. He cooks the veggies in the smoker—long enough to infuse them with mesquite smoke, but short enough to keep their vegetal crunch. You can certainly smoke the vegetables ahead of time at a previous smoke or grill session.

INGREDIENTS 2 large tomatoes, stemmed and cut in half widthwise 2 large tomatillos, husked, rinsed, and cut in half widthwise (or more tomatoes) 1/2 small onion, peeled and halved 3 serrano chiles, stemmed and cut in half lengthwise (for milder salsa, remove the seeds) 1 habanero chile, stemmed and cut in half lengthwise (for milder salsa, remove the seeds)

set up your grill for indirect grilling (see page 22) and heat to medium-low.

2. Arrange the tomatoes, tomatillos, onion, and chiles, cut sides up, in foil pans. Place in the smoker or away from the heat on the grill. If using a grill, add 1 cup unsoaked wood chips or 2 wood chunks to the coals. Cover and smoke the veggies until they are just beginning to soften, 20 minutes.

Keep some crispness—the vegetables should remain raw in the center. Let cool.

Coarse sea salt

3. Cut the veggies into 1-inch cubes and place in a food processor. Puree as coarsely or smoothly as you desire. Work in the lime juice, cilantro, and salt to taste. The salsa should be highly seasoned.

1. If using a smoker for this recipe, set it up following the manufacturer’s instructions and heat to 275°F. Alternatively,

4. Transfer the salsa to a serving dish or bowl. Serve at once, or cover and refrigerate—it will keep for several days.

1/4 cup freshly squeezed lime juice, or to taste 1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro

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May 2019

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VIETNAMESE CRISPY BRISKET SALAD

Recipe on next page.

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May 2019

VIETNAMESE CRISPY BRISKET SALAD YIELD: Serves 4 to 6 METHOD: Deep-frying PREP TIME: 20 minutes COOKING TIME: 2 minutes for frying the brisket HEAT SOURCE: Stove YOU’LL ALSO NEED: A deep saucepan; a deep-fry thermometer (optional); a slotted spoon or skimmer WHAT ELSE: Fish sauce is a malodorous condiment made from fermented anchovies. Look for it in the Asian foods section of your local supermarket.

This aromatic salad pinballs that traditional Vietnamese quintet of flavors—salty fish sauce, sour lime juice, sweet sugar, pungent garlic, and fiery chiles—with crispy, meaty shreds of smoky brisket and fresh mint, cilantro, and other fragrant herbs. It’s the perfect way to enjoy brisket on a hot day.

INGREDIENTS For the dressing 1 clove garlic, peeled and minced 2 tablespoons sugar, plus extra as needed 5 tablespoons freshly squeezed lime juice, plus extra as needed 2 tablespoons Asian fish sauce, plus extra as needed 2 tablespoons cold water 1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper For the salad 1 cup vegetable oil, or as needed, for frying 1/2 pound barbecued brisket (see pages 41 to 70), torn into slender shreds 1 seedless cucumber (such as Persian), cut crosswise into 1/4-inch slices 2 serrano chiles (preferably red), or to taste, stemmed and thinly sliced crosswise 2 scallions, trimmed, white and green parts thinly sliced on a sharp diagonal 2 cups stemmed mixed fresh herbs, including cilantro, Thai or conventional basil, and fresh peppermint or spearmint (at least two, ideally all three) 3 tablespoons chopped dry-roasted peanuts 1. Place the garlic and 1 teaspoon of the sugar in a small mixing bowl and mash to a paste with the back of a spoon. Add the remaining sugar, lime juice, fish sauce, cold water, and pepper, and whisk until the sugar is dissolved. Correct the seasoning, adding lime juice, fish sauce, and sugar to taste. The dressing should be highly seasoned. The dressing can be made ahead and stored in a sealed container in the refrigerator for up to 1 hour until serving (longer than that and the garlic tends to take over). 2. Just before serving, line a plate with paper towels. Heat the oil in a deep saucepan or wok to 350°F. Working in batches, deep-fry the shredded brisket until sizzling and crisp, 2 minutes. Transfer the brisket with a slotted spoon to the prepared plate to drain. 3. Pour the dressing into a large serving bowl. Stir in the fried brisket shreds. Add the cucumber, chiles, scallions, and herbs.

Toss to mix. Sprinkle with the peanuts and serve.

Image on previous page.

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May 2019

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NO TEST REQUIRED

Suzanne Eder

“

No test is required. Your knowledge of your own worthiness is all that was ever needed.

Have you ever had the experience of intending to create or experience something you want, only to be met almost immediately (and persistently) with frustrating obstacles? And might it have, at one time or another, convinced you that realizing what you want is virtually impossible, so you might as well let it go?

If you read last month’s article, you might recall that I passionately encouraged you to honor your heartfelt desires as the Divine inspirations they are to express more of the magnificence that YOU are, because expressing the brilliance of your true Self is the very essence of fulfillment. Not only does it bring you deep, personal satisfaction, it’s the means through which you most helpfully, authentically and joyfully serve others.

So why, then, if desires are Divinely inspired and are intended to be experienced, does it feel so hard to realize them? If you asked 100 people this question you would likely get 100 different answers, but one widely accepted notion – in many personal growth teachings as well as spiritual ones – is that you’re being tested, and that testing is part of the process.

I have to tell you, that doesn’t thrill me. If it doesn’t thrill you, either, please read on.

First let me say that I understand why this idea of being tested during the creative process seems to make sense. I remember feeling tested more than a few times on my own journey of coming into an ever-fuller expression of who I am, including fairly recently. Yet I always pause to step back from that interpretation and reach for a deeper and, for me, more loving truth.

What I’ve realized is that, ironically but not surprisingly, the tendency to interpret a challenge as a test or obstacle to overcome arises from the same false belief that gives rise to many of those challenges in the first place: we’ve forgotten who we really are. We’ve come to believe that we’re somehow separate from the Source of creation itself, rather than understanding that we are extensions or expressions OF it.

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We literally have the creative power of Source at our disposal. Yet because we’re generally unaware of this stunning truth – and in fact have often been conditioned to believe its opposite - we don’t know how to access that all-wise, all-loving power.

The countless implications of our false belief in separation from Source are vast, so much so that I could hardly do them even the smallest justice in a single article or even an entire book. But I can talk a little bit about one of those implications right here.

When we believe ourselves to be separate from Source, we feel vulnerable at a fundamental level and, in some way, not fully enough.

In our vulnerable state of not-enough-ness, we falsely believe we have to prove ourselves worthy to others so we can earn our share of the good – and also, perhaps, to prove ourselves worthy to the Source or God which seems to have the ultimate power to make our lives easy or hard.

So when we want something, we automatically believe that we have to prove our worthiness to have it. We believe we have to prove our commitment. We have to prove our skill. We have to prove our persistence and tenacity. We have to prove that we’ve learned our lessons.

And the only way to prove these things is through tests or obstacles, which we expect to be a part of the process.

It can be quite exhausting, yet it’s what is commonly believed and expected – and experienced.

I believed it to be true for quite some time, until I finally acknowledged to myself that I wanted a joyful life, not a hard-won life. I wanted ease rather than struggle. I wanted Grace rather than force.

I wanted not victory over hardship, but victory of a different kind. I wanted to stand victorious, in unabashed love for myself and belief in myself, so that I could say - in both humility and exaltation - that Love is who I am, and that Love is who we all are. I wanted to honor my gifts and talents and share them joyfully with the world.

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May 2019

— continued on next page

— continued from previous page

And, frankly, I wanted to have some fun. I didn’t want to keep taking test after test for the rest of my life.

Fast-forward to today, years and decades after initiating my search for a different way of living. I now see life as an organic and evolutionary awakening process, not as a series of tests to prove our worthiness or readiness to experience good things. So I’ve replaced the idea of being tested with this one: In the process of waking up to the magnificent truth of who we are, and learning to live from that expanded and inspired place, we sometimes – often? - make things harder for ourselves than they need to be.

That’s the really short version. The slightly longer version includes this: But that’s okay, because it’s all part of the learning process. The more we learn and practice, the easier it becomes.

Now, that may not thrill you a whole lot, either. After all, no one actually wants to make things harder for themselves than they need to be; the reason we want to live from a more expanded and inspired place is that life becomes more ease- and Grace-filled than what we commonly experience.

But there is a learning process. What there isn’t, in my belief and understanding, is a God or Spirit who requires that we take tests to prove ourselves worthy of Divine Grace. There is no pass or fail, no need to suffer, and absolutely nothing to prove.

Let me share an even longer (but still quite abbreviated) version of my understanding of why it may feel hard to create what you deeply want in your life. First, the foundation: You are an extension or expression of an all-loving, Infinite Intelligence – you might call it God or Source or Creator or the Universe or the One – therefore your longings are an impulse arising from the very heart of creation, expanding itself through you by calling you toward your highest fulfillment.

You are literally endowed with the creative power of Source.

And now an explanation for why you may feel tested: If you’re experiencing difficulty or hardship in realizing your longings, it’s only because you aren’t fully aware of your own magnificence. And in that lack of awareness you’ve come to believe things about yourself that aren’t true, and those false beliefs are interfering with the full expression of who you are.

I hope you can really take that in. The difficulties you face are not a reflection of how inept you are, but of your forgetting how magnificent you are. Can you sense the possibility, the validity of that? And can you sense how life-changing it would be to embrace that perspective?

Rather than berating yourself for failing or not knowing how to get through something, you could ask yourself one or more loving questions instead, such as: “What if the opposite of what I’m thinking right now is actually true, and this is simply reflecting a false belief?”

— continued from page

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May 2019

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— continued from previous page

Examples: What if I do have what it takes rather than don’t?…

What if I’m actually quite clear even though I keep telling myself I’m confused?…What if my resistance to doing this is a form of guidance that it’s not mine to do rather than proof of my laziness?

“How is this experience helping me clarify what I truly want?”

“What talent or skill of mine is now eager and ready to be called upon?”

“If I was a full-on advocate for my own worth, talent and desires, how would I interpret this?”

In short, once you understand that difficulties aren’t tests to prove yourself but are, instead, reflections of false beliefs about who you are, they become clear invitations to know and love yourself more than ever before. So the simplest and most direct question you can ask yourself, when you feel challenged or overwhelmed, is this: “How can I love myself more right now?”

When you ask and answer that question with sincerity, again and again, your life begins to change, for the better.

You might have noticed that, in my oh-so-brief explanation of what might actually be happening when you think you’re being tested, I referred to difficulties as, simply, interference. I explained that false beliefs are interfering with the full expression of who you are. And that was very intentional.

Because of the inherent creative power of our thoughts and language, words such as “obstacles” magnify the expectation and experience of continued hardship. The words “interfere” and “interference” are not only less dramatic, they’re more accurate.

Remember, everything in this Universe is vibrational, and the energy of thoughts and emotions is the basis for everything we eventually perceive through our physical senses when a certain strength and stability of vibration has been achieved. Energy patterns of similar frequencies create harmony, while energy patterns of dissimilar frequencies create interference.

perception through your physical senses. You don’t get the job offer.

You offer a workshop and no one signs up. You submit your book proposal to several agents and they all turn it down.

In these and countless other similar scenarios, you aren’t being tested by anyone or anything outside of yourself to prove your worthiness or your commitment or your discipline, although the situation may catalyze your own natural enthusiasm for, and commitment to, your dreams.

(And hopefully it will do just that.) No one is really out to get you.

You’re being shown evidence of the beliefs you hold that interfere with the remembrance and full expression of who you really are. Or you’re being guided away from something that isn’t harmonious with what you want, which is a subject for another time.

Either way, the experience becomes an opportunity and an invitation to reach for the deeper truth of who you really are, not a test to prove anything to anyone…except, perhaps, to “prove” to yourself – to recognize, cultivate and share with others – the richness of talent and passion that are uniquely and irreplaceably yours.

As you practice sustaining focus on the deeper truth of your magnificence, your experience of life starts to change in delightful ways.

You begin to experience the feeling of being in the flow of your own life. Illuminating and inspiring synchronicities occur, help shows up without you having to ask for it (or maybe you finally feel at ease asking for it), things start falling into place. The whole world – your world – feels kinder.

You’re still learning and growing and finding solutions to what initially appear as problems, but you feel more alive, clear, peaceful, guided and supported than ever before. And that’s because – if you’ll permit me a humorous but very apt throwback to an old L’Oreal commercial – you’re worth it. And, finally, you know it.

No test is required. Your knowledge of your own worthiness is all that was ever needed.

So the interference I’m talking about with respect to feeling tested are the things and experiences you might interpret as obstacles when they show up. They’re the outpicturing of your false beliefs that interfere with the remembrance of your magnificence– you know, things such as, “I don’t have what it takes…” or “No one will hire me in this economy…” or “What I want isn’t practical…” or “I will be tested…”

What you experience as an obstacle is the strong momentum of doubtful or judgmental thought-energy, which has reached the tipping point for

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Formerly a successful finance director in the corporate world, Suzanne Eder is now an award-winning writer, healer, transformational teacher and personal guide. She completed a comprehensive 4-year program in mind-body-spirit healing at the Barbara Brennan School of Healing, and she has devoted her life and work to an ever-deepening understanding of how to create deeply fulfilled lives through an understanding of our spiritual nature. She was a featured speaker at the 2015 TEDxWilmington conference and her popular talk is available on YouTube. She offers inspired and practical counsel in all areas related to personal growth and transformation. Visit her at www.suzanneeder.com or email her for more information at suzanne@suzanneeder.com.

May 2019

Odontophobia and Horticulture Therapy

Spring is in the air! Mulch is being laid. Bulbs are shooting up. Flowers are starting to bloom. It’s a perfect time to finally visit your dentist … especially if you suffer from odontophobia, the fear of dentistry.

If you do, you’re definitely not alone. According to one study, odontophobia is the fifth most common cause of anxiety. Nearly 40

million Americans suffer from dental anxiety so severely that they avoid going to the dentist at all. Unfortunately, putting off going to the

dentist only makes the anxiety worse. If left untreated, that minor pain in your tooth will only get worse, and in the end will likely require even more invasive treatment.

OK … but what does spring have to do with it? The answer has to do with horticulture therapy, a burgeoning field that studies the therapeutic benefits of gardens. Since we humans have evolved in natural settings, it makes sense that we have a propensity to respond positively to the outdoors. As far back as 2000 BCE, gardens were seen as a resource for creating calm. Egyptian physicians prescribed walks for their patients who were dealing with mental illness.

Horticulture therapy really took off in the wake of WWI, as doctors and psychiatrists brainstormed ways to treat soldiers returning from war. In 1959, the Rusk Institute of Rehabilitative Medicine added a greenhouse to its campus for the purposes of integrative treatment. A little over a decade later, the Menninger Foundation teamed up with Kansas State University’s Horticulture Department to create the first university Horticulture Therapy program.

Interest in this field has only grown throughout the past four decades.

Recent studies have documented the positive health benefits of nature.

One study found that 40 percent of the participants said that “being around plants made them feel calmer and more relaxed.” When plants are placed in hospital rooms or when patients have an outside view from their hospital room, patients experience lower blood pressure, less pain, anxiety and fatigue. They also experience shorter recovery times and require less pain medication.

Dr. Andrew Swiatowicz

Some studies have looked specifically at horticultural modalities in dental settings. For instance, research shows that dental patients inhaling lavender often note a reduction in anxiety levels. One reason for this might be that the scent masks the typical sterile odors that patients are used to smelling in dental offices. Additionally, pleasant smells have been demonstrated to improve mood. On a neurologic level, lavender reduces the level of certain signaling molecules in our nervous system resulting in a relaxed state.

At Swiatowicz Dental Associates, we believe that green spaces have a lot to offer our patients, and we’ve designed our office with this in mind. Before reaching our front door, patients walk along a lush and fragrant garden path. We also have a colorful garden out back. Inside our office, there are live plants placed throughout the waiting rooms and each treatment room.

Additionally, each treatment room contains a large window which allows our patients and staff beautiful views of the foliage outside. We also use aromatherapy to help calm patients while receiving treatment.

“Stop and smell the roses” is great advice, and it might help to remember it the next time you visit the dentist. Before your appointment, take a walk or spend some time surrounding yourself with nature. Your immersion into the natural world may be all you need to help you overcome your odontophobia.

Kathy Andrzejewski, CEO of Nature Connectz ( a horticulture therapy business) is a certified horticulture therapist that provides services that include sensory garden planning, horticulture related lectures, and horticulture focused activity sessions or gatherings. You can contact her at kathy.andrzejewski@gmail.comfor horticulture related services that will strengthen your health and well being.

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Dr. Andrew Swiatowicz is a general dentist. His practice, Swiatowicz Dental Associates, is in the Pike Creek area. He also has a separate practice, Delaware Dental Sleep Medicine, dedicated to treating sleep disordered breathing (sleep apnea, snoring) in children and adults.

You can learn more at www.DelawareDentist.com.

May 2019

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COME TO YOUR SENSES: Calm Your Mind

By Karen Verna Carlson

The first frame of a cartoon sketch shows a nondescript person seated. A simple line drawing. The word THINK is printed across forehead in thin 12 pt type. Next frame, same image with four or five THINKs scattered willy-nilly around head. Third frame shows an increasing number of THINKs around shoulders and torso.

Then the seated person is completely masked by THINKs. The final frame is empty white space with a pile of THINKs on the floor. Even the chair is gone; only THINK rubble remains. I forget where I saw it or who authored it, but its message remains vividly fresh: rich healthy life requires rest periods from our incessantly active minds.

Sleep Rest Inadequate Sleep is generally a period of natural mental rest built into our rhythmic circadian/diurnal bodies, but fast paced digital-pixel-wireless living overloads THINKing.

A restful night’s sleep may happen only occasionally, and sometimes not at all. Sleep inducing chemicals whether prescribed or OTC contribute little to mental rest and refreshment.

Strategies for calming, quieting, resting brain/mind activity are many and varied forms of meditation or mind training. A mind that is clear and serene is a most effective and efficient instrument facilitating not only physical and mental health, but also attracting beneficial circumstances.

Add Habitual Respites Therefore, I suggest that you consciously calm your mind for two- to three-minute intervals throughout the day. Unplug THINKing— sort of. In previous columns I’ve encouraged counted breathing as a way to constructively, gently, kindly soften THINKing to almost a lull periodically. It is impossible to stop thinking. Even when you may not be aware of thinking, a steady stream or rushing white water river of thoughts pulse and surge beneath your conscious radar. Since your earthly mind’s job is to THINK, THINK, THINK it cannot initiate a NOT THINKing moment. So we engage a personal Higher Consciousness or Big Mind for this task. Like training a puppy into domesticated dog-hood, directing your mortal mind into habitual respites eventually results in cooperative success.

With a few tried and true mind calming sites established, engage one of your senses to kick start the respite interval. This paradox is a little mind boggling (note the ‘little mind’ pun), which is actually helpful to derail incessant THINKing for a few minutes. You are kick starting a process of stopping compulsive THINKing. Remember, that which is unfamiliar always feels weirdly uncomfortable even though the consequences of change yield vastly superior lifestyle experiences.

Stretch Neck or Eyes Now, what physical senses can you bring to the foreground of your awareness while sitting in the driver’s seat? Tactilely, bend your neck bringing chin towards chest for a deeply satisfying vertebral stretch, holding for 10 counts while observing normal breathing. Slightly release the stretch, and gently bend your neck laterally to right or left and stretch each alternately in that position. Hold, count, breathe. Next, arch neck back. Avoid discomfort. Another option, take just your eyes into a stretching routine. Body comfortably relaxed, head balanced easily on neck, roll both eyes upward to a pleasant max. Hold that for 10 and watch normal breathing. Do a downward eyeball stretch without shutting lids.

Hold position, count, breathe. Return eyes forward, then shift them to a right side stretch. Hold, count, breathe. Repeat towards left. Pay no attention to anything visual, just feel the comfortable stretching and breathing while THINKing numbers one through ten. Why not try stretching neck or eyes right now? The package of stretch, awareness of breathing, and conscious counting is a mini mind vacation.

Smell Tranquility Use your sense of smell to train your mind into tranquility. In your car’s console stow a vial of an essential oil like lemon or rosemary or sandalwood.

With the cap closed, give it a shake. Keeping the vial upright, open and just touch your finger to the rim for less than a drop to rub between your fingers. Close eyes, inhale fragrance and count from one the length of that breath, then exhaling back down to one. Five is my comfortable numerical range for each phase. Or, instead of counting, try repeating a word or two that empowers quiet, like ‘peace’ for the slow inhale, ‘calm’ during extended exhale. Personally, I find the stronger scents like patchouli or cedar do not engender as relaxing a state-shift as the milder ones, so please experiment with in-store testers before selecting one. Having just one for this purpose supports consistent strong reinforcement.

Sound Softens Thought

Find Respite Sites To start, create external reminders to calm THINKing. Establish site links for rest. For example, getting into your car is a perfect site for a mental pause moment. In the center of my steering wheel is a blank ultra pink Post-It that reminds my earthly mind to shift into neutral for two minutes before I start the car engine and resume thought machinations.

This may be too difficult if your lifestyle is heavily invested towards speed and efficiency. In that case, strengthen your Big Mind creativity to scan a typical day’s agenda for physical sites that allow a relatively private respite for a few minutes of breath awareness and counting.

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Senses Trigger Calm

Still in your car, auditory cues for softening thought activity can come from CD music or meditation soundtracks different than what you’d listen to driving. Another option is to hum low in your throat like a Gregorian chant an especially calming song from a favorite movie or play.

Deep humming also works with Christmas carols or hymns. Mantras chanted silently or vocally are classic meditation activators. Two to three minutes with your eyes closed, observing your breathing, feeling resonant vibrations can disengage compulsive THINKing.

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May 2019

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— continued from previous page

Use Visual Cues

Include Clouds, Water, Trees, Pets

An easy visual link to momentarily calm mental activity would be gazing at a favorite photo or art reproduction kept in a paper towel tube in the console. Feel your relaxed inhale, and one at a time count each exhale from one to four, then four to one. When consistently repeated, just a couple minutes daily have vast restorative benefits.

Outdoors, watch clouds or a brook or ocean waves for several minutes while experiencing your breath and counting or chanting. Clasp your hands around a low tree branch that’s strong enough to hold your weight, lift your feet and hang a few minutes breathing and counting. At home your dog, cat, ferret, gerbil, parakeet, iguana will love the attention of a stroking meditation as you attend to breathing and counting.

Taste, Breathe, Count You can alternatively before starting your car engage your sense of taste to rein in THINKing. I’ve repurposed dental floss containers for dried whole rosemary leaves, mythically attributed to pleasant remembrance.

Two or three release aromatic oils when I massage them between molars, bringing forth familiar states of calm. Whole fennel or caraway seeds are similarly convenient to use meditatively. As with the other sensory links, I direct my attention adjunctively into the present moment of breathing and counting.

Match Meditation with Sites All of these activities and many, many more can be utilized in other settings throughout each day. In your office chair spend a few minutes reaching, reaching towards the ceiling with one arm, strrrrretching that side of your torso as you feel your breathing and count exhales. Do the other side for half a minute. Alternate a few times, and you’ve refreshed your mind just like you do with that computer option. Swivel your chair to face a different direction than your computer, and hang a picture on which to gaze (with awareness of breath and recitation of numbers) fully focused for two or three minutes in the present physical moment.

Dr. S. Rosenthal Doctor of chiropractic Award Winning Columnist

Perseverance Yields Treasures I’ve been sharing meditation strategies for the past few years because I still need to actively initiate consistent episodes for cheerfully reinforcing practice without force. The results in my quality of life have been phenomenal, but my practice fades quickly, as do the benefits, without vigilant renewal. I invite you to discover the treasures meditation offers to all who persevere.

Karen Verna Carlson, N.D., Ph.D. (Hon.) is a naturopathic physician and professor credited with “the first major breakthrough in Swedish Massage—research demonstrating energetic interconnections”—since Peter Ling systematized massage in the early 19th century. After 35 years running her own nationally accredited school of holistic healing and massage she has retired to continue holistic research and education through lectures, study groups, and writing as well as with individual women clients. Karen has received international recognition for holistic healing and educational work, an honorary degree, silver Prix Hippocrate medal, and Who’s Who Listing. She has presented programs for television, radio, professional symposia and public conferences. Her work has been featured in professional publications as well as in mass media.

To reach Karen: karenvernacarlson@gmail.com Phone 302.777.3964

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Recommendation: Serve with a salad.

This is a light and refreshing dish for Spring and Summer.

Use with button or cremini mushrooms to create small appetizers.

Lamb Stuffed Shiitake Mushrooms.

1 lb ground lamb

2. Remove the pan from the stove. Add salt, smoked paprika, crushed red pepper, and the fresh chopped herbs. Let the mixture cool completely.

¼ cup small diced white onion 3 cloves chopped garlic 1 Tbsp olive oil 1 rosemary sprig chopped (rosemary removed from stem) 5 mint leaves finely chopped 1 tsp fresh oregano chopped 1 tsp salt ½ tsp smoked paprika ½ tsp crushed red pepper 1 Tbsp tomato paste 8 large shiitake mushrooms (4 small portobellos may also be used.)

1. In a pan, on low to medium heat, place the oil, onions, and garlic in a pan, cook them until translucent

3. In a bowl, place the lamb, tomato paste and the cooled onion, garlic and herb mixture Mix all ingredients. Place in the refrigerator for 30 min.

4. If using portobellos, remove the stems and black gills from the underside.

5. After 30min divided the mix into 8 or 4 portions depending on the number of mushrooms you have.

6. Pre-heat your oven to 400. Fill each mushroom cap with one portion and press into the cap.

7. Place the stuffed mushrooms on a sheet tray. Bake for 15 minutes. Remove the tray from oven let them cool or serve directly.

They can also be lightly grill before serving.

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May 2019

Andrew Thorne, Executive Chef, Home Grown Cafe Chef Andrew has over 18 years of being in the food industry and holds a degree from the New England Culinary Arts Institute in Vermont (2007). Andrew was born and raised in New Hampshire which helped cultivate his love of gardening and supporting local farmers. He infuses that passion into the cuisine at Home Grown Cafe.

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