Is kindfulness the secret

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YOUR GUIDE TO EMOTIONAL ISSUES AND FAMILY LIFE WITH PSYCHOLOGICAL THERAPIST EMMA KENNY

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WAYS TO SPOT A DISHONEST PARTNER

Apparently, men think they’re better liars than women. Emma explains the ways you can spot deceit – and challenge it

Research has found men ar e twic e as likely as w omen t o consider themselv es good liars. S tatistically, y ou are lied t o betw een t en and 200 times a da y. L ying is part of being human –it ’s due t o the difference betw een who we ar e and who w e r eally w ant to be . In a marriage , one in ev ery t en int eractions betw een

partners in volves a lie . In a longt erm relationship, that goes up to one in three. Many are small, like, “I didn’t eat the last biscuit,” but for bigger ones, the art of seeking truth is being confident in challenging those we think are deceiving us. Body language is key – if your partner stays out all night and r eturns with sk etchy e xcuses, doesn’t engage with y ou, a voids e ye contact, or tries t o blame y ou for being c ontrolling, y ou ar e potentially dealing with a liar. Truthful people ar e c ooperative, as the y ha ve nothing t o hide . Truth is tr ansparent, as ar e those t elling it. If y ou ac cuse an honest person of t elling a lie , they oft en r eact with hos tility as the y feel lik e y ou are ques tioning their integrity, which a truth-teller w ould hat e. If y our other half seems w elcoming of your ques tioning, or calm as the y giv e y ou a hundr ed e xcuses, chances ar e the y ar e telling a fib . It ’s in our DNA t o sniff out lies as a surviv al instinct, so trust your gut. If you get an uneasy feeling, tell them, “Sorry, I don’t believe you”, or, “That doesn’t ring true”. It may be awkward, but it also helps to train those around you to watch telling white lies when they are in your company.

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Closer’s dating expert, Rebecca Twomey, questions whether romance is well and truly over, or if there’s a way to reinstall some old-school values

fter six years of trying my luck – or rather, experiencing a lack of it – with online dating, I’ve found the A

one thing that’s missing from my life, other than the obvious

absence of a boyfriend, is romance. I do not mean a

one-liner on WhatsApp. I mean real, old-school charm and

new survey has found that half of Brits believe their parents’ generation had more romantic

love stories than we do, with a quarter jealous of those tales.

And who can blame them? Everything feels so disposable

now. With dates readily available at the next swipe right,

everything I’ve experienced makes me think that no one

feels the need to make the effort with one individual. I’m