Nannies London: Etiquette Check-List
Congratulations to all nannies on getting your new nanny jobs in London. Before you start please read these important reminders of nanny etiquette. Some might seem obvious but all are essential points to remember always, no matter how long you’ve been in the job.
1. Never, ever discuss your employer’s personal life with anyone. Matters such as the state of the parents’ relationship, divorce proceedings, affairs, or how they deal with their children, their career or financial state is absolutely no one else’s business. Parents that employ you will expect complete confidentiality about their private affairs and loose talk could cost you your job as well as the chance of a good reference, not to mention damaging your reputation as a professional nanny. Losing their respect and trust is simply not worth a bit of gossip over coffee with your nanny friends. Don’t risk it! Many nannies have lost their job and even faced legal action as a result of their loose tongues! Respect the family’s privacy always, never snoop in their personal drawers and don’t eavesdrop on their private conversations or phone calls if they happen to be around when you’re there. 2. If you are unhappy about any aspect of the role, tell the parents. Do not just complain about them, or their children to your friends and family or anyone who will listen. That is a very good way of losing your job and your professional reputation as well. Communication is key. Request regular meetings with your employers – say once a month – even if only a quick coffee and chat about how things are going. It can be nerve wracking at first but it is essential to bring up any issues with the children, or things like them being repeatedly very late home from work without paying you openly and preferably in person (emails lack the advantage of tone and facial expressions and can all too easily be taken the wrong way e.g. as aggressive/ whiny or even downright rude when they may not have been intended that way). If you have used one of the good nanny agencies in London, you could try calling them if
you have a problem even if you’ve been in the job a while as they are likely to have heard of similar issues in the past and be able to advise you. 3. Professional nannies in London often offer advice to parents as new situations in their children’s life occur from toilet training and teething to disciplining a wilful one. Do always remember though that the parents’ have the ultimate say in how their child is brought up. Respect their wishes and follow their guidance when it is given. Do not make major decisions on your own without consulting with the parents first. Always follow the routine they have set, so that routines aren’t altered.
4. On a similar note to point 3, never allow the children to regress when a parent has asked for assistance with things like weaning a child off a bottle or dummy, moving from nappies to pull-ups or pants, or dropping daytime naps, just to make things easier for yourself. You will be found out eventually! 5. If the parents don’t want to allow their child to watch TV whilst they’re in your care keep that television switched off at all times. Yes, that’s right, even if they watch it all the time when the parents are in charge! If they are allowed to watch TV make sure all programmes are age appropriate (same goes for toys!) 6. On a similar note, always respect the parents’ wishes regarding diet and religion e.g. no sweets ever if that’s the parents’ request, no meat if they wish their child to be brought up vegetarian. 7. It goes without saying, that you should never, ever impose your values (such as religion (especially if your views differ, even slightly from the parents’ beliefs) or whether Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny are real) on the children you work with, it is simply not your place to do this.
8. The safety and wellbeing of the children you look after is of course paramount. Always err on the side of caution with regards to sun-cream, wearing sun hats and ensuring the children drink plenty of water on warm days. Make sure they are wrapped up warm when it is cold outside. Get them clued up on road sense as early as possibly, always hold their hands when crossing the street or walking along a busy pavement. Keep your attention on them 100% when in a play park and carry a small first aid kit with you in your ‘nanny bag’ for those cuts and scrapes! Never leave children alone, even if close by, and especially when bathing the children or when outside near a road or pond/ lake/ swimming pool. 9. Play dates can be a great way of reducing the sometimes lonely nature of a nanny job. Some London nanny agencies offer a ‘contact service’ to put their London nannies in touch with each other such as those with nanny jobs in Chiswick so they can arrange play dates between them. During such occasions though, always keep your full attention on your charges and don’t get so involved in conversation that you take your attention off them (even if other nannies aren’t focusing on their own charges). As mentioned above, avoid getting involved with gossip about your friends’ family, or their friends and relatives and certainly don’t give away any private details about your own employers. 10. Let the parents know about any accidents that occur as soon as possible and inform them immediately about things like high temperatures. Keep a diary to record daily occurrences which can include accidents but also things you’ve done each day and any new achievements the child has had. If the parents leave a cash kitty for daily expenses like playgroups and petrol money, record all spend in the diary/ log book, even if they haven’t asked you to – it just looks professional. Your London nanny agency will be able to advise you on other things you might like to record in the nanny log-book.
11. Keep the house clean and tidy and never, ever let it be in a worse state of tidiness when the parents get home than it was at the time they left that morning. A tall order with small children, but get them to help you wherever possible and tidy up after yourselves as you go along. Keep the kitchen spotlessly clean and keep on top of your nursery duties, getting these done where possible in child nap / nursery times so you can devout your full attention to the children when they are with you. 12. It goes without saying that you should not consume alcohol whilst on duty, but also keep it to an absolute minimum even the evening before. A hung-over nanny does not an alert and 100% effective child carer make! 13. Parents need their nanny to be totally reliable with the absolute minimum unexpected days off and lateness. Always leave more than enough time to allow for traffic jams/ public transport delays/ forgotten wallets and get there 5 minutes early rather than 5 minutes late. Persistent lateness will not go down well. If you are running unavoidably late call them to let them know as soon as you possibly can. Live as healthy a lifestyle as possible with a balanced diet, exercise and limited weekends overdoing the alcohol to avoid falling prey to every passing bug your dear charges and their friends may pass on to you. Use common sense when it comes to illness, if you feel well enough to go into work but you’re recovering from a nasty weekend sickness bug (not caught from the children you care for) for example, do let the parents know by phoning them Sunday night or first thing Monday morning so they can decide whether they want to risk you being still contagious and coming in. If you have a day off during the week, do try your utmost to get all your personal and medical/ dental appointments dealt with on that day so you don’t have to take time off during work days, meaning your employers have to make alternative childcare arrangements. 14. Never swear, or blaspheme – or ever speak critically of the children’s parents anywhere near them. 15. Never invite personal guests to your employer’s house (even when the children are asleep or at nursery) unless you have received permission from the parents to do so. Even then keep personal visits to a minimum. Good luck London nannies – we wish you good luck in your new London nanny job! http://buttonsnannyagency.com/