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EDITOR IN CHIEF Joan Herrmann —
ASSOCIATE EDITOR Lindsay Pearson —
CREATIVE DIRECTOR Matt Herrmann —
GRAPHIC DESIGNERS Chris Giordano Andrea Valentie Oliver Pane —
CONTRIBUTORS Lorie Gardner, RN, NBC-HWC Sean Grover, LCSW Gayle Gruenberg, CPO-CD, CVPO Rick Hanson, PhD Joan Herrmann Emma Isaacs Linda Mitchell, CPC
FROM THE EDITOR — The year 2020 has been one that most will never forget. We have had to navigate health issues, financial concerns, isolation, employment obstacles, political unrest, and a host of other matters, that quite frankly, we all will be happy to see end. When I was contemplating what I wanted my final 2020 message to be, the only word that kept coming to mind was gratitude. I guess that is because the message of focusing on blessings and gifts was made so clear to me this past weekend. During a recent routine shopping trip, I purchased food items for a local pantry. There have been so many news reports of people waiting in lines across the country to receive supplies that I decided I wanted to help. I boxed up nonperishable items and went to a local church, which had begun distributing food at the onset of Covid. When I arrived, I could not believe the line of cars wrapped throughout area roads – up and down as far as I could see, people waiting to receive basic items that most of us take for granted. Witnessing that truly humbled me. When I got home, all of the things about which I constantly worry, didn’t seem so important. I thought: there but for the grace of God go I. At any moment, I could be in that situation, in one of those cars. I was thankful that I wasn’t. Then, I thought about all of the people and things that I seldom take the time to appreciate. I was overcome with emotion. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and give thanks continuously.” Emerson’s words offer an introduction into what practicing gratitude can look like. With gratitude, people acknowledge the
goodness in their lives. As a result, gratitude helps us connect to something larger than ourselves. Research shows that having a connection to something bigger, even in times of challenge and change, makes us happier and healthier. Even though it usually is during the most difficult times that being grateful seems impossible, that is when it is more important than ever. Gratitude can help us cope with traumatic events, regulate our negative emotions, change our outlook, and lift our spirits. It helps us notice and appreciate all the good things, thereby enabling us to think more positively as a result. So, how do you actually start a gratitude practice? Practice mindful moments of gratitude, similar to what I experienced. Take a few minutes every day and focus on the present. Start noticing what’s around you and mentally say everything for which you are grateful. Then stop replaying every detail of the traumatic experiences in your life. Reframe the situation to focus on a positive aspect. Even though it may not seem possible, there is always something good that can come out of a negative situation. Finally, share your blessings. Bring more feelings of gratitude into your life by spreading gratefulness. Just like a smile can be contagious, so is a positive, grateful outlook. What better time to begin this practice than the holiday season?! Thanksgiving through the New Year celebration is the perfect time for reflection; it’s a time of birth and renewal. So, here’s to the start of something new!
— Joan Herrmann
ROBERT KERBECK
ISSUE NO.122
INSIDE THIS
ISSUE GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT BY RICK HANSON, PHD
PAGE 12
CHALLENGE YOUR FEARS BY JOAN HERRMANN
PAGE 18
THREE TRAITS THAT BREED HOPELESSNESS AND FIVE WAYS TO CREATE HOPE
ON THIS MONTH’S
C OV E R HORRIFIC WILDFIRES BURNED IN CALIFORNIA AND WE HEAR ABOUT THEM ON THE NEWS. BUT, WHAT IS IT LIKE TO WATCH THE BLAZING MONSTER COME AT YOU AS YOU’RE FIGHTING TO SAVE YOUR HOME? ROBERT KERBECK, AUTHOR OF MALIBU BURNING: THE REAL STORY BEHIND LA’S MOST DEVASTATING WILD FIRE, SHARED HIS STORY AND THE LESSONS HE LEARNED FROM THE EXPERIENCE. ROBERT IS AN AWARD WINNING ACTOR AND WRITER WHOSE ESSAYS AND SHORT STORIES HAVE BEEN ADAPTED TO FILM, THEATER, AND NOW HIS FIRST BOOK. LISTEN TO ROBERT ON CYACYL: https://bit.ly/33XcoJ5
BY SEAN GROVER
PAGE 22
DOES CLUTTER AFFECT YOUR QUALITY OF LIFE? BY GAYLE GRUENBERG
PAGE 24
LISTENING TO YOUR BODY’S WISDOM FOR BETTER DECISION MAKING BY LINDA MITCHELL
PAGE 28
DOES YOUR HEALTH INSURANCE PROTECT YOU? BY LORIE GARDNER
PAGE 32
JUST KEEP SWIMMING BY EMMA ISAACS
PAGE 36
DECEMBER 2020
24 SEVEN MAGAZINE
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ISSUE N O. 1 2 2
DECEMBER 2020
GIVE THEM W H AT THEY WA N T Research shows that relationships are built from interactions, and interactions are built from moments. A critical moment in an interaction is when one person wants something from the other one. (“Wants� include wishes, needs, desires, hopes, and longings.) The want could be simple and concrete, like please pass the salt. Or it could be complex and intangible, such as please love me as a romantic partner.
Written by Rick Hanson, PhD
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Wants can be communicated in many ways. Gaze, touch, tone, facial expression, posture, and action speak volumes. Whether verbally or nonverbally, some people express their wants clearly, but many do not. The more important a want is, the more likely it will leak out slowly, or be expressed with a lot of distracting add-ons and emotional topspin. Now what?! Think of a significant relationship. How clearly have you expressed your own wants in it? How do you feel when the other person makes a sincere effort to give you what you want? When I reflect on these questions myself, it makes me realize that it’s not so easy to communicate clearly and that I should cut others more slack. Second, it makes me realize that I should generally try to give others what they want if it’s reasonable and possible. Out of self-interest, doing this is the best odds way to get off their radar, build goodwill, and take the moral high ground. Out of benevolence, doing this is kind and caring. Everyone is scared and hurting, not just me. Of course, I do not mean giving people things that would harm them, you, or others. Nor do I mean giving up asking for what you want. And if they’re rude, demanding, threatening, snippy, high-handed, or harsh, then their want could be a nonstarter until they change their tone. In essence this practice is about an inner freedom. You are free to decide what is reasonable in what the other person wants and what you are going to do about that. You are free to disentangle yourself from your emotional reactions to their wants. And free to live by your own code, honoring your own values and perceptions of reality, no matter what others do. How? Find out what they really want. Sort through the surface clutter to the real priority for the other person. What could be the softer, deeper, younger longing? Perhaps ask
questions like: What is important to you here? What would it look like if you got what you wanted? Most people want pretty straightforward things: Put the cap back on the toothpaste. Don’t interrupt so much. Ask me questions each day about myself, and pay attention to the answers. Be nice to me. Keep being my lover even while we raise children. Pull your weight with housework. Stick up for me with others. Be interested in how I feel. Most of the time, it’s really not that hard to give someone what they want. It’s more a matter of whether you want to. Once you have a pretty clear idea about what the person wants, decide for yourself what if anything you are going to do. Remember that your wants matter, too, and that you can’t give without also filling yourself up. And remember that giving others what they want is usually a good way to take of yourself. Personally, it was a great breakthrough to realize that giving others what they wanted was not knuckling under to them. Rather, it was a kind of triple-bonus aikido move that tapped into my caring for people while pulling me out of conflicts and putting me in the best position to ask for what I wanted myself. I redefined situations in which people criticized me into a kind of game in which I unilaterally eliminated the reasonable basis for their complaints, and began to enjoy what’s traditionally called “the bliss of blamelessness.” Pick something reasonable and just give it to the other person for an hour or a week without saying a word about it, and see what happens. Pick something else and see what happens. When it feels right, talk about what you’re doing. When you like, also talk about your own wants. This practice may seem like a high bar. But actually, when you make the shift, it’s like walking downhill with the wind at your back. You are still taking care of your own needs and not letting people push you around. Instead of getting caught in sticky quarrels, you’re delivering the goods as best you can and moving on. Know what it’s like to be with someone who takes care of herself while also giving you what you want as best she can? That’s what it’s like to be with you when you do the same yourself. Very sweet!
About The Author
RICK HANSON Rick Hanson, PhD, is a psychologist, Senior Fellow of the Greater Good Science Center at UYC Berkeley, and a New York Times best-selling author. His books have been published in 29 languages and include Neurodharma, Resilient, and Hardwiring Happines. To Learn More Visit: www.RickHanson.net
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December 2020 Issue
Challenge Your Fears Written by Joan Herrmann
F
Fear is one of the most powerful forces in life. It affects the decisions you make and the actions you take. And while the primary role of fear is to keep you safe, it often becomes the obstacle that stands between you and your dreams and goals. There are rational fears, the ones that are based in reality such as encountering a bear while on a hike in the woods, and there are the irrational fears that keep you stuck. These are the stories you tell yourself about outcomes you believe will happen, with no factual basis. They usually begin in childhood and remain with you until something is changed. These can be labeled destructive fears. It’s not always easy to recognize your fears and how they keep you stuck. Here are a few clues that experts say may help you determine if your life is guided by fear rather than joyful freedom: • You see only the downside. Someone governed by fear tends to identify with the worse case scenario, focusing on the failure and pain. • You avoid anything new or unknown. Fear keeps you stuck, afraid to take a chance or step out of your comfort zone – even if your current situation is painful. • You stay small. Fear encourages you to avoid any potential failure or rejection. You don’t push boundaries or experience growth and development. • You are indecisive. The fear of making the wrong decision keeps you from making any decision at all. Second guessing is second nature and avoidance becomes your way of life. If you see yourself in any of these scenarios, how can you move past the fear? First, become aware of what scares you and how you respond. Keep a journal and when you recognize a fear, jot it down. Then write down how you react when fears arise. Keep track of
anything that seems significant. Learning about your fears can help you transform them. Once you are aware of your thoughts and responses, you can employ a few strategies for change. Use your imagination for good. Instead of letting your thoughts take you down a dark hole, imagine yourself in the situation with a positive outcome. Take a time out. Don’t react immediately and give yourself some time and space for analysis. Clear your mind by focusing on your breath, taking a walk, or participating in any activity that calms you down. Then, when your mind is clearer, analyze the situation with a new perspective. Talk to a friend or advisor. Gaining insight from someone on the outside can help you see a situation in a different light. Remember, FEAR is nothing more than False Evidence Appearing Real. You can allow fear to stop you from taking action, or you can face, challenge, and overcome it. The choice is yours!
About The Author
JOAN HERRMANN Joan Herrmann is the creator of the Change Your Attitude… Change Your life brand and host of the radio show and podcast, Conversations with Joan. She is a motivational speaker and the publisher of 24 Seven magazine. To Learn More Visit: www.JoanHerrmann.com
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Three Traits That Breed Hopelessness and Five Ways to Create Hope Written by Sean Grover, LCSW
You have trouble getting out of bed. You think to yourself, “Why should I?” There’s nothing to look forward to. Today will be the same as yesterday. Yesterday was the same as the day before, and the day before that, and the day before that, etc. “Is it possible to die of sameness?” you wonder. You check your phone — more bad news. The virus, the economy, the environment, politics, the world is coming apart. Why are you the only one who seems to notice? You scroll through social media and discover that your friends are living on another planet. They’re riding bikes, picnicking, traveling — and you haven’t been out of your pajamas for a week. How do you go on living when you feel so hopeless? When you lose hope in one area of your life, it slowly bleeds into others and colors everything you see. Viewing the world through the lens of hopelessness results in blocking out hopeful events and only seeing the hopeless ones, a process psychologists call “confirmation bias”. In other words, you seek out situations that reinforce your outlook while ignoring those that challenge it. Three Traits That Destroy Hope Before we consider how to generate hope, let’s look at the most common traits that foster hopelessness: Extreme thinking. Always/never, good/bad, right/wrong, hero/villain. You divide the world into extreme fractions and ruminate on the negatives. You are quick to label others who are different from you or disagree with you, a choice that drains you
of humanity. Sadly, in the world of relationships, labels block out hope by suggesting that people are one-dimensional and incapable of change — including you. Such extreme thinking ultimately leads to narcissism: You’re a cult of one. Resignation. Convinced that nothing will ever change, you sink deeper into cynicism. Rather than take action, you blame and complain and resign to your hopeless outlook; you even take pride in it on some level. Such cynicism robs you of energy and prevents you from listening and learning from others or exploring new experiences. Isolation. The more you isolate, the more deluded your thoughts may become. When you shut out the world and live in seclusion, anxiety increases whenever you leave your home. Distrust spikes. Depression takes root. And the more entrenched you become, the more hopeless you feel. Creating Hope Psychologists have long held that hopelessness is a learned state from early childhood that we carry into adulthood. It’s like a baby elephant tied to a post: He learns to stops struggling; he can’t break free. By the time he is full-grown, though he could easily break the rope, he doesn’t even try. Experience has taught not to. In the same way, adults frequently remain emotionally tethered to childhood traumas when they were trapped or powerless. Naturally, new choices, new behaviors, and healthier habits could help them break free. By carrying the hopelessness that we felt as children into our adult lives, we make an error in time that keeps us stuck and mired in our emotional past. One of the key ways of creating hope is to disrupt patterns that promote hopelessness and challenging the behaviors that feed it. Here are five ways you can start to break free: 1. Engagement. The opposite of isolation is engagement. Casting off passivity and negative thinking requires that you engage more in the world around you. Even if you don’t want to, it’s essential to push yourself to try. If hopeless is a virus, engagement is the antibiotic you need. 2. Acts of Service. Altruism is one of the least
From The Story
“You have to decide the person that you want to be and redirect your thoughts and actions in that direction.”
recognized and more powerful weapons against hopelessness. As the Buddhist saying goes, “When you light a lantern for another, it will also brighten your own way.” Stop fixating on your problems and making them worse. Devote some time to helping others less fortunate than you and learn to value yourself more. When you give others hope, you receive it as well. 3. Humor. Laughter is good medicine for the spirit. A hearty laugh also releases endorphins and adrenaline, raises metabolism, and reduces stress hormones. There are even studies that suggest that laughter strengthens the immune system. 4. A mindfulness practice. A lack of mindfulness is frequently at the core of a hopeless outlook. Mindfulness practices such as meditation, yoga, or prayer pause our tortured thoughts and inspire us to live more fully in the moment. Self-reflect also disrupts emotional reactivity that so often breeds negative thinking. 5. Determination. The most important and challenging tool for undoing your hopeless outlook is determination. No matter how much therapy, medication, counseling, or life coaching you engage in, at a certain point, you have to decide the person that you want to be and redirect your thoughts and actions in that direction. Short-circuit your complain-and-blame process by giving yourself an order and following it. For example, “I’m going out today. I’m calling an old friend. I’m going to look into volunteering in my neighborhood.” In his inspiring collection of essays, Hope is Decision the Buddhist peace activist Daisaku Ikeda writes: “When we change our inner determination, everything begins to move in a new direction. The moment we make a powerful resolve, every nerve and fiber in our being will immediately orient itself toward the fulfillment of this goal or desire. On the other hand, if we think, ‘This is never going to work out,’ then every cell in our body will be deflated and give up the fight. Hope, in this sense, is a decision.”
About The Author
SEAN GROVER, LCSW Sean Grover, LCSW is a psychotherapist and the author of When Kids Call the Shots: How to Seize Control from Your Darling Bully and Enjoy Being a Parent Again. To Learn More Visit: www.seangrover.com
D O E S C L U T T E R A F F E C T YO U R Q U A L I T Y O F L I F E ? Written by Gayle M. Gruenberg, CPO-CD, CVPO
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I have the privilege of working with clients who are affected by chronic disorganization. My clients have ADHD, a traumatic brain injury, OCD, or another brain-based challenge that affects their cognition or executive function. Supremely talented in other areas, these challenges affect their ability to be organized and manage their “stuff ”. When they reach out to a professional organizer, they may know they need help organizing, but they don’t always realize the full impact of their challenges. They may have low insight into the effects of clutter on their daily lives. The Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD) has created the Clutter Quality of Life Scale (CQLS) as a subjective assessment of the consequences of clutter on a person’s daily quality of life, including interpersonal relationships, psychological distress, financial difficulties, physical challenges, and unsafe living conditions. Using a scale of 1 (Strongly Disagree) to 7 (Strongly Agree), the CQLS asks respondents to rank their responses to 18 statements that gauge the extent to which they are experiencing the effects of clutter, such as: • I feel overwhelmed by the clutter in my home; • I avoid having people come to my home because of the clutter; • I have incurred debt I can’t really afford as a result of having too many possessions; • I have neglected taking care of things that need to be done in my home because of the clutter. A total “score” of 18 to 54 would indicate the perception of a low impact of clutter on someone’s quality of life, while a score of 90 to 126 may indicate that someone’s life is significantly impaired by clutter. The CQLS is a valuable tool in a professional organizer’s kit, and the results can be eye-opening for the client. Knowing how a client perceives the impact of clutter on his or her quality life can guide the organizer in how open the client is to accepting help and affecting change. The
client may never before have stopped to consider how clutter impacts their life, and completing the CQLS may be the wind that blows away the mental fog the client had been experiencing as a result of being surrounded by clutter. Once someone is aware of the impact of clutter on one’s life, appropriate steps can be taken to mitigate its effects, like seeking counseling and professional organizing help. The speed at which change can take place is up to the client. Some clients are immediately ready to improve their quality of life, some need a more gradual approach, and some say they are ready for change, but they are comfortable in their current situations. The awareness that the CQLS brings lays a foundation on which the organizer and client can build the trusting relationship needed for creating effective organizing systems.
About The Author
GAYLE M. GRUENBERG Gayle M. Gruenberg, CPO-CD, CVPO is the chief executive organizer of Let’s Get Organized, LLC, an organizer coach, and the creator of the Make Space for Blessings system. To Learn More Visit: www.LGOrganized.com
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December 2020 Issue
Listening to Your Body’s Wisdom for Better Decision Making Written by Linda Mitchell, CPC, LMT
Have you ever struggled to make an important decision? You did the research, listed pros and cons, and yet still felt confused or unsure? You are not alone. Critical thinking is a good start but often the process leaves us feeling undecided or second guessing ourselves. Here is the good news: there’s a valuable resource that’s free, accurate, untapped and just waiting for you to access. What’s more, it’s been proven through decades of research to possess accurate decision-making information. Welcome to your body! The body holds so much wisdom and intelligence, yet this valuable resource is often overlooked or dismissed. As a bodyworker and coach, I have spent the last two decades listening to the wisdom and intelligence of others’ bodies and teaching them how to discern the valuable knowledge within. It’s an unfamiliar and intriguing concept to some, but for those open to an effective way of gathering accurate and trusted information to make good decisions, it is a game changer! There are several major wisdom areas in the body that can guide you in challenging times and help you stay aligned with your best choices when facing important
decisions. Here is a brief synopsis of the gifts of the top six. The wisdom of the heart will always lead you down the right path if you listen and follow its urgings. Allow yourself to get quiet and ask your heart what inspiration and whispers of wisdom it has for you in the given situation. Notice without judgement. Don’t dismiss or edit. Your first inspiration is best as it comes without influence from the linear brain. The signals can be quiet initially; give yourself some time to allow your heart to share the gift, message, word or memory that provides guidance. The heart guides you on what is truly in alignment with your soul’s longings and desires. The gut is another critical point of reference; it’s like a second brain. We all have heard of the gut instinct because our gut provides essential instinctual information. Be sure you are not connecting to old feelings, beliefs or memories. Instead, tune into present moment data that is not emotionally charged. If you relied only on the past for answers, you would quickly see your limiting beliefs, patterns and fears come into play, which could easily sway you from making your best decisions. Present moment gut instincts are the most accurate. Once you have a clear hit from your gut you can assess the facts and decide on the wisest actions. One of the best ways to change the habit of second guessing yourself is to pay attention to your gut instincts. Another key wisdom area is the skin. It is your largest organ and constantly provides clues to help guide you. Have you ever gotten chills when a good idea is affirmed or feel an uncomfortable charge like electricity shooting through your body when something is wrong? Temperature, vibration and texture are just some of the ways our skin communicates through sensation. When you need to digest a lot of divergent information in order to make a good decision, it is wise to get your legs involved. Have you ever gotten stuck, decided to take a break and go for a walk? That’s brilliant because walking gets the opposing upper and lower limbs moving in unison, thereby integrating the left and right hemispheres of the brain, which allows you to
“The body holds so much wisdom and intelligence, yet this valuable resource is often overlooked or dismissed.”
better catalyze information. It’s no coincidence that an infant’s nervous system, motor skills and ability to interpret information matures after they learn to crawl because that action creates balanced brain thinking. Swing your arms while walking to enhance that crossover action in the limbs. Then there is the wisdom you glean from your bones. They provide stability, clarity and steadiness; they’re like the scaffolding of the body. Dropping deep into the awareness of the bones allows you to explore what is pulling you off center. The bones represent the core of who you are and what you need. By learning to drop into the depths of who you are, you will find the fog of distraction clears while the fear and chaos of the outside world dissipates. Honoring your bones this way provides clarity of thought and creates a feeling of being grounded and secure. Use the sturdiness of your bones to find clarity in your decision. In our culture, the brain is queen. By applying linear thinking, you allow it to usurp the rest of your body’s wisdom. It’s not improper, it’s just woefully incomplete. I urge you to instead revere all information your body has to offer. Once you have listened to each wisdom area, you can then employ the brain to integrate all the information. This valuable knowledge is fed to the brain to help you make healthy action plans, choices and decisions. In today’s challenges, uncertainty and fear mongering, it’s essential to integrate guidance from each wisdom area for optimal decision making and to create clear and creative solutions. Doing so keeps you in alignment with your soul’s true purpose and passion. By staying present in your body and tuning in to the incredible resources and wisdom within, you’ll soon move you from struggling with options to confidently arriving at the decision that best suits you! Cheers to your body of knowledge!
About The Author
LINDA MITCHELL Linda Mitchell is a board-certified coach, speaker, reinvention expert and LMT. She empowers people who are stuck, overwhelmed, or ready for change to release their struggles, gain clarity, and balance and radiant health as they move through life’s challenges and transitions and step into their highest purpose. To Learn More Visit: www.LivingInspiredCoaching.com
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December 2020 Issue
Does Your Health Insurance Protect You? Written by Lorie Gardner, RN, NBC-HWC
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We spend a small fortune on health insurance every year. Is it a good investment? Yes. Without a doubt. Having good health insurance is a game-changer when it comes to care, costs, and peace of mind. Of course, if you can independently finance the cost of care on your own, insurance would not matter, but not many can do this. Some can’t afford any insurance and they can easily confront a very difficult time if they have a major health event. Not only is it a good investment to have health insurance for times of illness, but it is also often a good investment in staying healthy. Many policies now offer all kinds of health and wellness options that many insured people do not pay attention to such as subsidizing gym memberships and coverage for some alternative therapies. That is why it is essential to read your plan because if you don’t, you could be letting opportunities to stay in good health pass you by. How to Get the Most Out of Your Policy? Read it! It is amazing that so many people have no idea of what their policy covers. Read it annually when you renew it, make sure you understand any changes. You don’t want any surprises down the road. If you don’t read the entire policy, at least read the Summary of Benefits and Coverage, which you should have printed and on hand for reference. Establish a presence on the online portal and become familiar with it. It offers a wealth of information that is useful – and it is all about you and your health!
Note whether or not your providers are in-network and check out which lab is in-network for maximum reimbursement. Make sure that you know which local hospitals are in-network as well. Take note of the cost of the ER visit and if it is waived only if you are admitted. Could you be on the hook for $2,000 if you’re not admitted? Know that in advance – maybe that local Urgent Care Center would be a smarter choice. The bottom line is before you secure any healthcare services, be sure you know what is covered and what your responsibility may be ahead of time. Do You Know What You Should Be Paying? Between deductibles, copays, and coinsurance, how can you make sure that bills are being paid properly? First, go back to your quick reference Summary and Benefits and Coverage and know your deductible, copay, and coinsurance. Here is a brief definition of those terms: • Deductible - the amount of money you have to pay before the insurance benefits begin. • Copayment - a specific dollar amount that you are required to pay at the time of a doctor’s visit. Co-payments are not subject to deductible, so it does not count towards the out of pocket maximum. • Coinsurance (allowed amount) - after the deductible is met, co-insurance is an expense to be paid by you, which is a percentage of the provider’s charge. • Out-of-pocket maximum - Out of pocket maximum - the amount that you have to meet for the insurance company to start paying 100 percent of the policy’s benefits. • Explanation of Benefits (EOB) - statement from your health insurance plan describing what costs it will cover for medical care or products you’ve received. The easiest way to track your EOBs is on your insurance company’s portal. All of the information to answer these questions is right there. Additionally, they now almost all have a “contact us” component. If you do not want to call and ask (fear of elevator music and hold time), you can send a quick note. It is an excellent tool. You can obtain answers to your questions and then, since it is in writing, you can hold them to the response. You can save your chat message for a reference. Make sure that you do not pay a provider’s bill for a couple of cycles as the numbers can change and trend downward as the insurance company makes adjustments. Never pay a provider a
different amount than what is on your EOB as the subscriber’s responsibility. From The Story
“80 percent of hospital bills have mistakes and these can be quite costly. ”
Read the Fine Print It is important to know that your insurance company and provider’s billing office must provide you an explanation of what the bill or the EOB means. Always read the fine print and codes at the bottom of the EOB as this may be a clue to a service that they did not pay for and there is an action you need to take. If something doesn’t look right, question it. You can have the provider do a second check on the coding on a bill because if the code is wrong by one number, it could be a significantly higher cost. Always document your phone conversations and ask your insurance company for a reference number for each call. Be aware that you always have an option to appeal an insurance decision. In these cases, it is good to get some professional advice. I will leave you with an interesting statistic: 80 percent of hospital bills have mistakes and these can be quite costly. Therefore, it pays to be informed and educated on what to look for and how to pay your bills according to your policy coverage. Know there are medical billing and insurance advocate professionals that can assist you with complicated issues.
About The Author
LORIE GARDNER Lorie Gardner RN, BSN, NBC-HWC, founded Healthlink Advocates, Inc., to assist people with all aspects of their healthcare. As private nurse patient advocates and board certified health and wellness coaches, they partner with clients seeking assistance navigating the complex healthcare system and those seeking self-directed, lasting health improvements aligned with their values. To Learn More Visit: www.Healthlinkadvocates.com
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DECEMBER 2020
ISSUE NO.122
J U S T K E E P S W I M M I N G Written by Emma Isaacs
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Each year, I get the tough gig of heading to Necker Island with a bunch of our members for a leadership conference. Sir Richard Branson bought Necker Island to impress his girlfriend, now wife, Joan, many years ago. He transformed it into a luxury resort and playground, as well as a conservation haven for lemurs, flamingos, and dozens of other exotic creatures. A few years back, he also bought the island across from Necker (as you do), called Moskito. Every now and then, Richard generously opens up Moskito for groups visiting Necker, as he kindly did for us. We were given the option to kayak, sail, standup paddleboard, motorboat, or swim across to Moskito. Being someone who never says no to a challenge, I chose the swim. I’d swum from Necker to Moskito before, completely winging it as I’m not a swimmer. When I made it across back then, I made a vow to myself that I’d never do it again. Not that I didn’t enjoy it, or feel a sense of accomplishment. I suppose I felt it was just one of those things in life that only needs to be done once. But here I was, attempting it again, and asking myself why. This time, the swim was quite cathartic for me. As I set off from Necker Island and started on the two-and-a-half-mile journey, all I could think about was how similar it was to the journey of an entrepreneur. First, you start out alone and ask yourself, “Why am I doing this again?” Then you find your rhythm, you gain momentum, and you think, “This is good. I’m heading in the right direction. I can do this.” Really soon after, though, you start to get a bit tired and begin to doubt yourself. “I’ve got a long way to go. This is hard. Why am I doing this?” Then you start to feel very, very alone. You look behind you, and there’s no one else there, and
you look ahead, and there’s no one there either. You realize that even though there are people who love and support you, the job of an entrepreneur is a lonely one. The next part of the swim is the hardest. You wonder if you’re getting anywhere, achieving anything. It’s just stroke after stroke, hoping you’re moving forward toward your goal. Just as you feel like you can’t go any further, there’s a glimmer of hope. A boat passes by, full of your people, and they yell out, “You can do it! You’re doing so well! Woohoo!” and you feel buoyed by their encouragement. You swim faster and stronger, and you feel invincible. But soon that boat is out of sight and you’re back being alone, and the water looks impossibly deep, and you start to think about sharks and stingrays and the unknown lurking beneath you. If you’re strong, you now dig deep, keep your head down, and keep going. You tell yourself you can do this. If you’re not strong, you look for the support boat, wave to them, and they come and rescue you, which is what happened to one of my fellow swimmers. I felt bad for him and watched as he was pulled from the water, but it made me even more resolved to succeed. Soon enough, the island you’re heading toward comes into view. Suddenly, your goal seems possible. It’s within reach. “You’re almost there,” you say to yourself. You lift your tired arms out of the water, one after the other, perhaps breaking for a second and looking for reassurance from the support boat. They nod in encouragement, and you start to feel like you just might have this. And it turns out you do. The water becomes shallower and shallower, and the white sand starts to emerge. You think, “I can’t believe I just did that.” You stand up, a little shaky from the swim, and your people are there for the high fives and the celebration. That swim was poignant for me, and the eternal question of how to succeed was answered (thanks, Dory): just keep swimming.
About The Author
EMMA ISAACS Emma Isaacs is the Founder and Global CEO of Business Chicks. She is the author of the book, Winging It: Stop Thinking and Start Doing. Why Action Beats Planning Every Time. She is also mom to six children aged under 11.. To Learn More Visit: www.emmaisaacs.com
