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T H E E X C L U S I V E M O N T H LY P U B L I C AT I O N A B O U T T H E G O O D L I F E I N G S TA A D

Friday 26 August 2011 - Issue 6 - CHF 3.50 excl VAT

IN-DEPTH ARTICLE

· Project to rebuild houses on Gstaad's Promenade stalled

MAGAZINE

Exclusively Yours

IN THIS ISSUE

· Get on the floor · Hotel project in Saanen takes shape · Exclusive book signing event at the GYC · Golfhotel in Saanenmöser celebrates 100 years · Hublot Polo Gold Cup · An interview with Barry Humphries

· A manners guide for the Nouveau Riche, part deux

Photo: Jonas Bach

COLUMN


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Magnifique appartement de 3 pièces de standing, entièrement rénové, situé au rez-de-chaussée d’un chalet à mi-hauteur du village. Il bénéficie d’une terrasse verdoyante et d’une vue dégagée. Situation calme et ensoleillée. Réf. 40 – CHF 1'085'000.00

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Friday 26 August 2011 Page 3

Contents

GSTAADLIFE IS AVAILABLE IN THESE HOTELS

Letter from the Editor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 Local News Get on the floor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4 In-depth article Project to rebuild houses on Gstaad's Promenade stalled . . . . . 5 Local News Hotel project in Saanen takes shape . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8 5th GYC classic car rally & yachting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Exclusive book signing event at the GYC. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9

Golfhotel in Saanenmöser celebrates 100 years . . . . . . . . . . 10 Team Gstaad Palace wins Hublot Polo Gold Cup . . . . . . . . . 11 Local Personality Tea with Barry Humphries . . 12, 13 Local News Michel Comte exhibition . . . . . . . 13 Events Events calendar. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14 Column A manners guide for the Nouveau Riche, part deux. . . . . . 15

***** Gstaad PALACE: +41 (0)33 748 50 00, info@palace.ch ***** GRAND HOTEL PARK: +41 (0)33 748 98 00, info@grandhotelpark.ch ***** GRAND HOTEL BELLEVUE: +41 (0)33 748 00 00, info@bellevue-gstaad.ch ***** WELLNESS & SPA HOTEL ERMITAGE-GOLF: +41 (0)33 748 60 60, ermitagegolf@ermitage-gstaad.ch **** HOTEL ALPENROSE: +41 (0)33 748 91 91, info@hotelalpenrose.ch **** GOLFHOTEL LES HAUTS DE GSTAAD: +41 (0)33 748 68 68, mail@golfhotel.ch

Letter from the Editor - Is this the change-over point? According to the website, Les Arts

ing train, however this is not the case

debate or presentations. This is the big

Gstaad, the proposed new building is to

according to the architectural model

business of people gathering and con-

be a space for art and art exhibitions,

on display in the window of the Gstaad

ference centres have sprung up all over

for music and concerts, readings and

Tourist Bureau. This structure will visibly

the world to offer varying context to

literary events, amateur theatre, ballet

be one of the tallest buildings to be found

meetings. Be they tobacco corporates

and symposiums, as well as for the pro-

between the Reichenbach meadow and

or climate change foundations, unique

motion of young talent and education.

the railway station and has the poten-

centres capable of holding delegates are

At face value it seems like a noble proj-

tial to change the visual composition of

attractive to big business and I am sure

ect aimed at balancing the sport and

what the region has become renown for,

that a venue with an artistic soul, in one

leisure attraction of the Saanenland

chalet style uniformity, amplified by the

of the world’s most beautiful rural loca-

with a good weight of cultural agenda.

strict visual management of the Gstaad

tions, would be a very attractive venue to

There are a few frightening aspects of

Promenade and its immediate surrounds.

host a corporate get together. Now may-

it though such as the thought of this

I was not aware of the proposed size of

be this is not at all what Les Arts Gstaad

mammoth building, in relation to ev-

the project until recently when I had

will do and maybe they will only keep

erything else around it, looming over

a cup of tea with Author / Illustrator,

their doors open to the fine aspects of art

us and our future as well as the volume

Huck Scarry. Sitting in the garden of his

and its many derivatives. I certainly hope

and type of people it may attract.

charming traditional chalet property he

so, as the thought of hundreds of suited

Les Arts Gstaad has the potential to be

described his concerns to me and I en-

delegates from faceless corporations

one of those architectural icons which

couraged him to put his thoughts to pa-

and societies, adorning plastic neck tags

we find around the world, hence giv-

per which are now published in this issue

marching up and down the promenade is

ing Gstaad another reason to be on the

of Gstaadlife. I further encourage more

chilling and capable of changing forever

world map and I am sure that our au-

interaction from our readers regarding

the ambience of Gstaad. So whilst we

thorities will encourage the design to be

this development and others. Opinions,

all soak up the comforts of summer and

in harmony with regional design regula-

both for and against should be published

enjoy the gentile activities of the Saanen-

tions. As for where it is proposed to be

so that we are able to air our views and

land, let’s get ourselves ready for debate

constructed however, so close to our

enrich debate regarding such matters.

regarding the evolution of our district

precious Promenade, it does have the

On reading the definitions of what activi-

and get to understand the relationships

potential to be overbearing as its style

ties are proposed to take place at Les Arts

between business and art.

is modern and directly juxtaposed to the

Gstaad, I couldn’t help zoning in on the

protected ambiance of the Promenade. I

term ‘symposiums’. This broad term for

Best wishes

would understand if it were to be a dis-

meetings or conferences results in the

Peter

creet structure tucked in behind the now

gathering of corporate, government and

modern looking Gstaad railway station

institutional delegates either separately

being partially blocked in view by a pass-

or together, brought in for discussions,

Follow

UPFRONT

**** GRAND CHALET: +41 (0)33 748 76 76, hotel@grandchalet.ch **** HOTEL ARC-EN-CIEL: +41 (0)33 748 43 43, www.arc-en-ciel.ch **** HOTEL BERNERHOF.: +41 (0)33 748 88 44, info@bernerhof-gstaad.ch **** HOTEL CHRISTIANIA: +41 (0)33 744 51 21, info@christiania.ch **** HOTEL GSTAADERHOF: +41 (0)33 748 63 63, gstaaderhof@gstaad.ch **** CHALET HOTEL HORNBERG: +41 (0)33 748 66 88, willkommen@hotel-hornberg.ch **** HOTEL OLDEN: +41 (0)33 748 49 50, info@hotelolden.com **** HOTEL STEIGENBERGER: +41 (0)33 748 64 64, gstaad@steigenberger.ch *** HOTEL BELLERIVE: +41 (0)33 748 88 33, bellerive-gstaad@bluewin.ch *** HOTEL ALPENLAND: +41 (0)33 765 91 34, hotel@alpenland.ch *** HOTEL ALPHORN: +41 (0)33 748 45 45, office@gstaad-alphorn.ch *** HOTEL ALPINE LODGE: +41 (0)33 748 41 51, info@alpinelodge.ch *** HOTEL KERNEN: +41 (0)33 748 40 20, info@hotel-kernen.ch *** HOTEL LANDHAUS: +41 (0)33 748 40 40, landhaus-saanen@bluewin.ch *** HOTEL SAANERHOF: +41 (0)33 744 15 15, hotel@saanerhof.ch *** HOTEL SOLSANA: +41 (0)33 748 94 94, info@solsana.ch *** HOTEL SPITZHORN: +41 (0)33 748 41 41, hotel@spitzhorn.ch *** POSTHOTEL RÖSSLI: +41 (0)33 748 42 42, info@posthotelroessli.ch *** SPORTHOTEL VICTORIA: +41 (0)33 748 44 22, info@victoria-gstaad.ch *** Z'LOFT HOTEL: +41 (0)33 744 69 69, info@zloft.ch HOTEL BÄREN: +41 (0)33 755 10 33, hotel@baerengsteig.ch

Peter Sonnekus-Williams Editor in Chief

also on www.gstaadlife.com

Gstaad LIFE, Anzeiger von Saanen, Kirchstrasse, P.O. Box 201, 3780 Gstaad, Phone: 033 748 88 74, Fax: 033 748 88 84, E-Mail: info@gstaadlife.ch, Website: www. gstaadlife.ch Management Board: Frank Müller, Peter Sonnekus-Williams Publisher: Frank Müller frank.mueller@gstaadlife.ch; Editor in Chief: Peter Sonnekus-Williams peter.sonnekus@gstaadlife.ch; Project Management and content coordination: Sanet Sonnekus-Williams Columnist: Mandolyna Theodoracopulos Translations: Diana Oehrli Editorial: Huck Scarry, Anita Moser, Christine Eisenbeis, Diana Oehrli, Tess Larosse Polygraph Team: Jonas Bach Printing: Müller Marketing & Druck AG, Gstaad Advertising: Peter Kuntze-Schneider peter.kuntze@gstaadlife.ch, phone 033 744 46 64 Subscriptions: Fabienne Koitka tel. 033 748 88 74

HOTEL GELTENHORN: +41 (0)33 765 30 22, F: +41 (0)33 765 32 31 HOTEL SANETSCH: +41 (0)33 755 10 10, F: +41 (0)33 755 18 11 HOTEL VIKTORIA: +41 (0)33 755 10 34, hotel_viktoria@bluewin.ch HOTEL WILDHORN: +41 (0)33 765 30 12, hotel@wildhorn.ch


LOCAL NEWS

Friday 26 August 2011 Page 4

GARAGE CARROSSERIE HÄNNI AG Lauenen 033 765 30 77 Gstaad 033 744 55 44 garage@haennigstaad.ch www.haennigstaad.ch

YOUR LOCAL LEXUS, TOYOTA AND DAIHATSU SERVICE CENTER

Body and paint shop Local car rental and airport service

Get on the Floor HUCK SCARRY FROM GSTAAD WROTE;

It certainly is a breathtaking architectural design - outside, with its vertical curtain of logs waving above a flowering field - and inside, with its faceted walls glistening with sparkling reflections, as if inside a giant amethyst stone. And certainly, it is time that the eyesore tent with the red toenails finally wandered away from the banks of the Saane to somewhere beyond our horizon. And yet the proposed new cultural centre planned beside the station is gathering more and more criticism, and I have wondered why. Having learned that an architect’s model of it could be seen at the tourist office, I decided to go and have a look at it. Mise en scène Now, I would suggest that anyone the least bit interested in this project do the same, for, I discovered, there is much to be learned from the model. But you must not just look at it through the window, where it has been placed, deep behind a copious box of flowers. No, you must go inside for a close look, and you might want to bring a pillow. For the model has been placed at no more than knee-height, so that standing, one views it as if from the basket of a hot-air balloon - not the

way you or I would normally see the village centre. So, you have to get down, way down, and lie on the floor in order to get your eyes placed somewhere near street level. What is immediately apparent from this angle is that the structure of logs bears little resemblance to the one brushed into the photomontages we’ve seen on paper. It is far more imposing. Its length continues beyond the end of the platform shelters of the station. In height, it is only a pinch less than the Hotel Bernerhof. Should you ever stand before the Post Office, take a look up at the height of the Bernerhof, then turn and imagine a similarsized structure standing just beyond the railway tracks, you’ll get a good idea of its size. In fact, if you get up again from the floor of the tourist office and lean over the model, you will discover that the log-faced structure could swallow the entire neighbouring hotel in just one gulp.

easy to understand, but one thing is clearly seen: the surface area below ground is considerably greater than above, and a few stories deep. Here, my mind turned to stone: what, I wondered might be the volume of rock which would be extracted to accommodate this building? How many truckloads of rocks would be needed to take it all away? Several hundred? A thousand? On the other hand, possibly the railway, so conveniently placed, might be used to cart everything discreetly, if not to say ecologically, away. But then: where to ? I have been saddened to read of plans to dump all the rocks in a nearby valley. This is going to be a lot of rocks - not only unsightly, but also no doubt with an impact on the environment where they’re left. I’m left with the same feeling I get when I discover someone’s picnic remains stashed in the bushes. Certainly a more creative and responsible solution for all the rock rubble needs to be found.

Rolling stones One remembers, however, that what we can see above ground is really only the tip of the iceberg. It is just the fin of the shark lurking below. On the wall of the tourist office are architect’s plans. They are not all that

Overture Needless to say, during the whole excavation phase of the building, the whole station area will resemble an open quarry, with all the drilling, hammering, dust and roar of trucks one associates with it.

Garderobe Finally, the planned access road, which I had trouble to see on the plans, remains a bit puzzling to me. The tunnel planned from the ‘Schützenweg’ roundabout to an underground bus station and underground parking (well over 100 places, I counted) not only seems to run lengthwise under the railway line, but also passes beneath a few houses. I can only imagine that this will mean that the tunnel will have to be dug out, mole-like, and hence be more costly than one dug out from above. But is this access tunnel really necessary? Does Gstaad really need an underground bus station? Does Gstaad really need yet another underground parking? The Coop parking lot, fairly quiet evenings, and the Unter-Gstaad parking are already in the immediate vicinity. Further, extra, and perhaps costless, parking could be found in the Schützenweg field. A simple footpath to the centre could make this an attractive evening-parking alternative. For just the thought of so many cars and buses trying to leave the centre after a concert simultaneously, their engines idling in the tunnel, also leaves me breathless - literally.


Friday 26 August 2011 Page 5

In-depth article

Project to rebuild houses on Gstaad’s Promenade stalled Photo: zvg

vehicles as well as storage space. Access to the garage would be via a car elevator in the rear of the houses. The apartments are not for sale but will be made available for rent. Still open is the issue of which businesses will occupy the retail spaces.

So could the row of houses appear on Gstaad’s Promenade after the rebuild of the ‘Jutzeler’ and ‘Hermenjat’ houses. A recent zoning plan revision classified two houses on Gstaad’s Promenade as ‘particularly significant objects.’ “The owner endeavors to keep this in mind,” says project manager Daniel Matti. Nevertheless, a start of construction is not yet foreseeable due to various objections to recent plans. A few years ago, a firm called “Einfache Gesellschaft Überbauung Promenade” (English: ‘Simple Company Development Promenade”) planned to tear down four houses in the village of Gstaad—the Jutzeler, Hermenjat and Bach houses as well as the Post Office—in order to build four connected buildings that would contain residential and commercial units as well as an underground parking garage. Due to substantial criticism and objections, the firm withdrew its project and replaced it with a renovation variant instead of a demolition one (see Anzeiger von Saanen January 9 and October 9, 2009 issues). The only building to be torn down in that second variant

would have been the Post Office. However, everything changed yet again. Two lots sold “We did not pursue that project further,” said Daniel Matti of Chaletbau Matti AG, project manager, and speaking on behalf of the property owners. “Both the Hermenjat and Jutzeler houses were separated from the overall project and sold by the firm HCT Beteiligungs- & Betriebs AG.” Both houses were classified ‘particularly significant objects’ in the new zoning plan, and there are plans to demolish and rebuild them. The owner has stated that the apartments in the existing houses were: in bad condition, left unoccupied for years, and therefore uninhabitable. A renovation would be disproportionately expensive. In accordance with the new building regulations, ‘particularly significant objects,’ are only to be demolished if the replacement object or transformed building takes the protection, design and renewal principles

into account, in at least an equivalent way.” “We have kept to these regulations to a full extent in our planning,” Matti said. A small volume expansion is planned. “We will not use up all the footprint that is allowable according to the building regulations,” he added. No structural eyesores Two houses with restaurants are planned in the ground floor as well as an apartment in each of the upper floors and attics. “The owner wants to keep the silhouette and facade design as much as possible,” Matti said. “ The architecture is simple, the houses have no dormers, and, along the Promenade side, no balconies. This was an important issue within the planning zone. The two buildings will not be structural eyesores in the townscape.” Matti preferred to speak of a reconstruction rather than a new build. The two houses will be connected underground with a common underground garage for ten passenger

Objections block the project Still open is the construction schedule. Originally, one had wanted to begin with the demolition of the buildings after summer 2011. During the 30-day input period, however, objections from neighbors and from an environmental protection group were filed. “The objectors put in question the design of the new buildings,” Matti said, “and the environmental protection group fights the entire project.” The building owner is understandably frustrated. “A large value was placed on an aesthetically appealing design and on a careful integration into the townscape. Nevertheless, there are objections that put this into question.” For the moment, no one can say whether the project can be realized. A building permission procedure is under way, and the owner is anxious to find solutions with the objectors,” Matti explained. In discussion with the Post Office Of the original project by the “Einfache Gesellschaft Überbauung Promenade” (translated as the ‘Simple Company Development Promenade”), the only plot to remain undeveloped is the one with the Post Office building. “We are working with the Post Office,” Matti said. “At the moment, development studies are being conducted.” Translated and adapted from the article by Anita Moser AVS 27.5.11


Antiquités – Décoration – Curiosités Main Showroom - Rotlistrasse 1a - 3780 Gstaad Tel. 033 744 60 00 Other Showrooms in Saanen at Chalet Flora, next to the JFK School and in Rougemont at Le Comptoir d’Enhaut.

Unique artistic images of mood and emotion. Including scenes of Gstaad, Saanenland & Pays-d‘Enhaut.

For further information and details of exhibitions and limited large commissions visit www.view-finder.ch and contact us via info@view-finder.ch. To see images on display also visit Basta at the Bernerhof Hotel.

Ian Wilson


Friday 26 August 2011 Page 7

Advertorial

Graff Diamonds

The House of Graff The House of Graff is synonymous with the most fabulous jewels in the world. The name symbolises rarity, beauty, excellence and, above all, the best quality and diamonds. Graff jewellery is exceptional; the quality, the style and the workmanship are renowned. Laurence Graff has a passion for diamonds that began at an early age. Having set an unsurpassed standard of excellence and innovation in the industry, it has been said that Laurence Graff has handled more important quality gemstones than any other Diamantaire. Graff in Gstaad Graff Diamonds is pleased to announce the opening of its first bouti-

que in Gstaad this winter season, located at The Grand Hotel Park. Monte Carlo-based designer JeanPierre Gilardino, who is also responsible for the design of Graff stores in Shanghai, Tokyo, Geneva, and Monte Carlo, amongst others, has designed this new store with the fashionable ski resort in mind. Details such as oak panels, hand engraved with a gold leaf finish to create a golden and luxurious effect, contrast with dark wood panels in the opulent entrance way, creating a distinctively chic and modern style. Design elements include fan-shaped metal panes and ornate chandeliers which echo the look of Graff’s other sumptuous stores. Every attention to detail and luxury has been considered, creating the perfect atmosphere for discovering the world of Graff. The new Gstaad store will be the epitome of ski chic, and a wonderfully elegant destination to view the most fabulous jewels in the world.

Fabulous Jewels Every Graff diamond is of the finest quality, which is how the brand has built its reputation as the creator of beautiful jewellery and the ultimate destination to discover rare and exquisite diamonds. All Graff jewels are made by hand in the Graff London workshop, from the creation of the design to the immaculate setting; each piece requires many hours of work, some several hundred hours. As well as its internationally reputed diamonds (the Wittelsbach-Graff and the Lesotho Promise amongst others), Graff prides itself on its fantastic collection of coloured gems and unique jewellery designs such as the Butterfly Motif collection. Each piece is thoughtfully and carefully constructed to create both a sense of fluidity and a sculptural effect, with each diamond set to achieve its utmost brilliance and to capture the light so that with every move of the wearer the diamonds sparkle, full of fire. The Diamond Flower Brooch combines over 1,000 sparkling diamonds set in platinum, capturing the essence of a flower. The star of the piece is the centre stone, a Fancy Intense Yellow radiantcut diamond. Surrounding this dia-

mond are 8 pearshape diamonds which frame this incredible stone perfectly. This magnificent Flower Brooch evokes the purity of the flower in a truly one of a kind piece. A new design, the Scroll Motif necklaces showcase Graff’s ability to source rare and exceptional quality gemstones. With ornate and intricate scrolls and swirls of sparkling white diamonds, hand set to showcase richly-coloured emeralds, sapphires and rubies in a multitude of shapes including pearshape, heartshape, emerald cut and cabochon, this stunning design is the epitome of high jewellery from Graff.


In-depth Local News article

Friday 26 August 2011 Page 8

Spectacular SAC huts for enthusiastic hikers The Swiss Alpine Club’s Oldenhorn section operates two well known mountain huts locally: the Geltenhuette and the Grubenberghuette. The trails to the huts are well marked and suitable for families with children.

In a unique mountain setting with spectacular views, both huts offer comfortable accommodation as well as excellent food and drink. A visit to these huts is an unforgettable mountain experience.

The hut managers look forward to welcoming you: Grubenberghuette SAC, 1840 m Ruedi Haehlen +41 79 335 27 62 www.grubenberghuette.ch Grubenberghuette

Hotel project in ­Saanen takes shape In 2001, the La Gare Hotel in Saanen closed and the property was sold. For the past 10 years, four different architects drew up plans for the property but failed to come up with a project that would satisfy all parties. On August 4, the Gemeinde unveiled a new La Gare project at an informational meeting regarding various building projects in the village. “This is the most complicated project that I’ve had until now,” said Gstaad architect Fabian Reichenbach, who drew up the most recent plans. Complicated because Saanen’s village center is a protected historical landmark, and the properties that encompass the project lie in three separate zones, each coming with its

own set of regulations. Reichenbach says he has spoken with neighbors, the Gemeinde, and the historic monument commission. “We must think smaller and tighten back the big demands,” he said. “The project must have a size that fits with the village.” Reichenbach says his project is smaller than is allowable. The plan includes two chalets to house residences, a three-star hotel with 25 beds, apartments, businesses and a tearoom. Building height in the rear will be kept low, out of respect for neighboring buildings. Reichenbach plans to submit the building application by August’s end. He hopes for construction to begin by spring 2012. Translated and adapted from the article by Christine Eisenbeis AVS 3.8.11

Geltenhuette SAC, 2002 m Marianne Stalder +41 33 765 32 20 www.geltenhuette.ch


Friday 26 August 2011 Page 9

LOCAL NEWS

Blue sky and magnificent roads for the 5th GYC Classic Car Rally & Yachting The Gstaad Yacht Club (GYC), with organizational help from the Gstaad Automobile Club (GAC)also invited to the event - held its 5th Classic Car Rally & Yachting on Saturday August 13, 2011. As in previous years the participants gathered for the registration and opening dinner on Friday evening, this time at the GAC Clubhouse in Feutersoey, where they were welcomed and briefed on the road book by Hansueli Brand, president of the GAC. On Saturday morning with the starting line in front of the Grand Hotel Bellevue, after a light early breakfast at 7h30 in the GYC, the competitors made last minute preparations to their cars. Among the automobiles reaching from the 80’s back to the 30’s were a couple of Aston Martins (DB3R and DB6), Mercedes (S and SLs), Landrover, Jagu-

Getting ready for the start in the morning.

The winners 2011: 3rd Moreland/ Frampton, 1st Mirabaud / Dyomina, 2nd Sandström/ Houghton. ars (one SS100 dated 1937), Bentleys (R Type Continental and S1 Fastback), two Alfa Romeos and Triumphs, an AC Ford, a Ford Cobra, a Porsche, a Ferrari, a Lancia, a Peugeot and a Lincoln. Engines were started promptly at 8h30. Perfect weather conditions allowed open-top driving on the back roads from Gstaad to the first check-point in Rougemont, further on to Château d’Oex, and then over the Col de Mosses to the second check-point on the Col des Agites connection to the Rhône valley at the border of canton Vaud and Bern. As a military road, closed during the week and therefore quiet on the weekend too, this pass allowed everybody to enjoy the wonderful nature and surprising, spectacular view of the Lake Hongrin and further west to the Lake of Geneva. Between two of the 47 bridges the special stage demanded consistency in driving. Through the one lane tunnel the road lead all par-

ticipants down to Yvorne and Aigle – one of the most famous wine areas in Switzerland. In the valley the third check point awaited all participants for a little coffee break with a special questionnaire. Passing the Castle of Aigle via magnificent back roads everybody had to drive up through the next vineyards of Ollon via Huemoz to Villars. On the Col de la Croix the fourth check point awaited all cars. Just behind Les Diablerets the road went up the picturesque alps of the Ormont-Dessus region to the hidden, but beautifully located Lac des Chavonnes. The same named restaurant, well known for its mushroom special-

ties, offered a perfect location for the sailing part of this year’s event. With a delicious lunch to strengthen the drivers, the participants exchanged their steering wheels for remote controls to partake in the fleet races of the America‘s Cup radio controlled model boats. After lunch and sailing everybody was free to drive home individually. Before the prize giving dinner in the Gstaad Yacht Club all participants enjoyed some time to relax from this memorable day. The final result combined the scores of driving, check points, questionnaire and sailing. 1st Place went to GAC member Pierre Mirabaud with his co-pilot Yuliya Dyomina, 2nd place to Jörgen Sandström and co-pilot James Houghton and 3rd place to last year’s trophy holder Jeremy Frampton and co-pilot Jessica Moreland. On behalf of the GYC, many thanks to all that helped make this event a success once again. Thank you!

AC Model Boat sailing at Lac des Chavonnes.

Exclusive book signing event at the GYC Wednesday, 10th August 2011 the Gstaad Yacht Club was very proud to offer the chance to meet TRH Prince and Princess Michel de Bourbon-Parme for an exclusive book signing event: Born 4th March 1926, HRH Prince Michel de Bourbon-Parme was made chevalier de la Legion d’ Honneur, titulaire de la Croix de Guerre

(avec trois palmes) and of the British Military Cross and published his autobiography "Un Prince dans la Tourmente" in 2010. His wife, HRH Princess Maria Pia de Bourbon-Parme, born as Princess Maria Pia de Savoie, published "La Mia Vita i Miei Ricordi", a book of her souvenirs including many photos. Both excellent books tell about their remarkable lives and

family. The Prince and the Princess came to Gstaad to give members and friends of the club the chance to autograph the personal edition of their books. Any profit from the Princess Maria Pia’s book will go to the association of her grandmother ‘Association Internationale Reine Helene’. By Gstaad Yacht Club

TRH Prince & Princess Michel de Bourbon-Parme.


LOCAL NEWS

Friday 26 August 2011 Page 10

Golfhotel in Saanenmöser celebrates 100 years Tourists came to Saanenland with the Montreux Oberland Bernois train. In 1911, the spa hotel in Saanenmöser opened its doors and would soon play an important role in the village and in the region. Illustrious guests such as Field Marshal Bernard Montgomery and the mother of Thai King Bhumibol spent their winter and summer vacations in Saanenmöser.

will become increasingly important to combine the living traditions with our fast pace world. Guests are looking for authenticity. Not such an easy task; how is it looking? This spring, for example, we erected beehives on our land. This way, we can offer honey to our guests, already next winter on the breakfast buffet. For many years, we have visited Erika and Jakob Zumstein during the summers on the Turnels Alp with our guests. The time that we make for this outing is important for us and for our guests. They show us another face of Saanenland. Also, we try to integrate a visit to the Ohringen farm of Thomas Sprenger, the cousin of Markus. There, we pull as many potatoes as possible, but he cannot cover all of our needs. The Johannisnüsse (special walnuts) that our guests know from our cheese buffet also come from Thomas’ farm; Markus picks them from the nut trees. Another project with Thomas is the breeding of young blue foot chickens. In March 2011, the first chicks hatched. We are very curious to see the result.

Andrea and Markus Sprenger-von Siebenthal took over the operations of the hotel from their parents on November 1, 2010 and are proud to be able to manage such a historical and beautiful hotel. The following is an interview.

Photo: zvg

In which direction will the hotel develop? In the future, the synergy between agriculture and the hotel will gain in importance. For example, we would like to bring our hotel guests closer to farm operations. After all, farmers and dairy cattle breeders founded many of the hotels in Saanenland 100 years ago. The running of hotels brought additional income, and it was often the women who ran those operations. We are convinced that it

Saanenmöser in winter circa 1940.

Do you have other ideas in this direction? Yes, we have forged a few plans with our crew. We offer seminar events in coordination with Emil Schopfer, integrating traditional cheese production into the program. In a team, participants make their own cheese wheels. The cheese maker care for them until they are ripe. When the right moment arrives, my husband or I will drive the cheeses to the team and hold a Käseteilet (cheese sharing event), or the group comes for another seminar and combines it with such an event.

Interesting, this is surely fun. Yes, we tested this with seminar clients, and they had a lot of fun. The cheese is not yet ripe, and we don’t know the qualitative result yet. Even if the cheeses fail to reach the maximum grade for a good cheese (20 points), they will still taste good. Do you have plans for the building? We have many plans, as for example, the expansion of the offerings in the wellness area and the step-by-step renovation of the main building. The next few years will surely not be boring. Which challenges do you see in the near future in the hotel business? Without doubt, the strong Swiss Franc will play a large role. We must try to beat this problem with quality and by maintaining contact with our guests. Our largest challenge continues to be the regulatory framework that has been placed on us by the canton and by the federal government. These are constantly made higher. This past winter, Markus had to take a four-day course and pass a final examination in order to have a professional license for the ‘Use of Biocide Products to Disinfect Bath Water in Common Area Pools.’ We are required to take the same course as public pool personnel! The hotelier is now a handyman and must be able to do everything, even though it would be more beneficial for him to spend time with our guests. Founding family Rudolf Wehren A visionary and pioneer, Rudolf Wehren-Schwenter built the Hotel Bahnhof with his wife Lina in Saanenmöser. The hotel opened its doors in 1908. Rudolf Wehren was

a farmer and loved his occupation. His wife Lina ran the hotel, the building of which proved to be too small from the outset. Rudolf Wehren bought some land from Johannes von Siebenthal in order to build the spa hotel in Saanenmöser with his brother Ferdinand Wehren. Ferdinand, who had been a hotelier in America, took over the management of the new hotel. In 1923, Ferdinand died in Belgium in a ballooning accident during the Gordon Bennett Cup, the world’s oldest gas balloon race. Rudolf and his wife took over the management of both enterprises. In 1937, the family was struck again by fate; Lina Wehren died. Sons Arnold and Franz Wehren took over various duties. In 1950, Rudolf Wehren handed over the operations to his son Franz, who ran the business until his death in 1978. After the death of Franz Wehren, his sons Franz and André took over the management of the sport hotel, and in 1984 decided to tear down the building and to replace it with a brand new building. In 1986, Franz Wehren opened the Golfhotel Les Hauts de Gstaad, which he then sold in 1996 to Heidi and Walter von Siebenthal-Spozio. Rudolf Wehren was also a pioneer in the transportation of those skiers who preferred to travel uphill in a vehicle rather than walk up on skins. At first, ‘caterpillar cars’ and a small funicular were used. The maintenance of these cars was very expensive. Often, the cars operated all night in order to keep the way free and clear. Starting in 1937, the switch was made to modern funiculars in order to bring skiers from Saanenmöser up on to the Hornberg. Translated and adapted by Diana Oehrli AVS 22.07.11


LOCAL NEWS

During the very last minutes of the tournament, Team Gstaad Palace with its captain Gualtiero Giori made three goals thanks to Menendez brothers Eduardo and Franckie, turning the game around and beating title defender Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza, with a 4-3,5 victory in the Hublot Polo Gold Cup Gstaad 2011. After the games on Saturday, two teams, Gstaad Palace and title defender Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza, led the pack with six points each. At that time, it didn’t seem possible for yet score-less Team Star Design to have much of a chance. However, it managed to advance to “Team of the Day” by first defeating German captain Albrecht Bach (0 handicap), and later tournament winner Gstaad Palace with 4-3. Then Star Design doubled its score with a 6-4,5 against Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza .

brothers Franckie (7 Hcp) and Eduardo (7 Hcp) made everything clear with goals 2, 3, and 4. Not even Alejandro Agote, the 8-handicap star player, could turn things around with his ninth match goal. Team Gstaad Palace won the Hublot Polo Gold Cup Gstaad 2011, beating title defender Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza 4-3,5.

Photo: Anita Moser

Top class and exciting plays On Thursday, Team Gstaad Palace had defeated title defender Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza with

a 6,5-5,5. In their second meeting, Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza won 5,5-3. On the third day of the 18-handicap tournament, the third game of the two teams presented again top class polo, matching the two preceding games almost exactly. Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza started off with a half goal because it had a total handicap of 18, one point lower than that of team Gstaad Palace (19 handicap). A little later, it looked better still for the Swiss team of Captain Daniel Aegerter, as Augustin Martinez (4 hcp) raised the score with a “genuine” goal to 1,5-0. But Gstaad Palace reacted promptly. It was Tete Storni (4 hcp), who with his eleventh match goal not only secured the title of “goal scorer king” but brought his team Gstaad Palace one half a point near Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza . Although Augustin Martinez raised the score to 2,5-1, placing his team Banque Baring Brothers into the lead, the play remained open. And shortly after the begin of the second chukker (game period; there are six chukkers per match), the Menendez

Battling it out in the heat – Teams Gstaad Palace (white shirts) and Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza fight for the cup in more than 30C (86F).

Perfect conditions Thanks to the many Argentine professionals who assembled here in the Bernese Oberland, polo shined at the highest level on this third day of the tournament. As one German photographer put it: “Do you really understand what a world class event you have in Saanenland? A match with such high-class teams would draw 100,000 spectators in Argentina…” Although far fewer viewers watched the game at the edge of the field in Saanen, Pierre Genecand, president of the Polo Club Gstaad was satisfied. “We have roughly the same number of viewers as last year,” Genecand said, “perhaps even more.” And this was so in spite of temperatures over 30C. Shaded areas were in demand, as well as headgear. For the ponies, the heat was not a problem, according the Daniel Aegerter, Swiss captain of Team Banque Baring Brothers Sturdza. “They sweat like us too,” Aegerter said. “At such high temperatures, we change ponies a little earlier than usual.” Aegerter praised the field, saying it was in excellent condition. The victory: the icing From the stands, team sponsors followed the “Final Hitchcock.” “If they are decent, they’ll let us

The lucky winners: Team Gstaad Palace Photo: Anita Moser

Team Gstaad Palace wins Hublot Polo Gold Cup

Photo: André Springer

Friday 26 August 2011 Page 11

… and Andrea and Laura Scherz win,” said Eric Sturdza with a wink towards family Scherz, which was rooting and cheering for its team a few meters away. Even if pleasure and non-profit or results stand in the foreground, a victory is “icing” on a super tournament, according to Andrea Scherz at play’s end. The first to congratulate him was his son, Alexander, who had cheered alongside his father. Overshadowing this year’s tournament was the tragic death of Swiss team patron Philipp Maeder before the start of the tournament. Team Hublot could therefore no compete; in honor of the deceased, each match started with a minute of silence. “I would have granted the victory from my heart to Team Hublot,” Andrea Scherz said. “Hublot does a lot for the tournament and I very much appreciate Jean-Claude Biver, the CEO of Hublot.” Translated and adapted by Diana Oehrli from the Article by Anita Moser AVS 23.8.2011


Local Personality

Friday 26 August 2011 Page 12

Tea with Barry Humphries

Barry Humphries Barry Humphries is an awardwinning actor, writer and comedian and lives in Saanen with his wife Lizzie Spender. Born in Camberwell, Melbourne, Australia, Barry has had a long and varied career, and is best known for his alter ego Dame Edna Everage, a Melbourne housewife whose rise to fame has been astronomical and who is definitely one of the best-loved, and most popular comedy characters of all time. I caught up with Mr. Humphries for a cup of tea and a chat at his home in Saanen. Barry Humphries: Are there any other Australians here ? Tess Larosse: I’m not sure… I don’t know, I can’t think of any… BH: This interview might bring them all out, you never know, flush them out… TL: When and how did you discover Saanenland ? BH: Well my wife Lizzie was always talking about it and about how nice it was here, and I thought, oh no, it’s going to be full of bankers, all living in cuckoo clocks, surrounded by azaleas and speaking in that strange ‘’Schweezer Dootsch’’. So about 13 years ago, I had a book to write and was in Ireland in a flat

borrowed from a friend and I had arrived there in the pouring rain with my typewriter to find out that the ‘’offer’’ was a basement bedroom, the use of a kettle and the rest of the house locked up in case I was going to steal things! I sat there miserably, having written about three words of my book, when Lizzie called me. She was staying with a friend in Schönried and said, ‘’it’s a lovely day here, what’s it like for you?’’ so I told her it was raining and I was miserable and her hostess suggested I join them there, so I did, and realised that I was in the middle of Europe, in a beautiful place and why had I protested against it for so long? After 9 / 11 some places really felt more secure than others and so we simultaneously bought a house in Sydney, and found this place in Saanen, with the help of some friends, and we love and adore it. I try to come to Saanen when I’m out of work, and I still work, unlike many people here, I’m not retired yet, I still do shows all over the world, appearing as my persona Dame Edna, and myself. I am quite well-known in the UK and Australia, and to an extent the United States, and I still enjoy a certain amount of anonymity here in Switzerland which can be quite nice, except of course when I’m trying to get a good table in a restaurant! TL: What are you doing at the moment ? BH: Next week I’m off to Australia to make a commercial to raise awareness about prostate cancer, which is a bit ironic , as Dame Edna is always talking about her husband’s prostate. So, it serves me right, a bit like karma… TL: I heard you’re going to appear in The Hobbit, a new blockbuster movie directed by Peter

Jackson of ‘’Lord of the Rings’’ fame, how did that come about ? BH: Yes I am. It’s going to be made in New Zealand. I got a call out of the blue from Peter Jackson who is a genius, and he said ‘’I want you in my new film, it’s a small role, but an important role, you’re going to play the King of the Goblins’’. It’s going to be full of fantastic special effects of which some of them may make me appear extremely fat, although I find so does some of the food at dinner parties here ! So that’s in October, they’re already filming now, and I’ll be going over to Wellington, where Jackson has his studios to film my part in October. I also appeared in a Broadway show last year, sharing the stage for the first time with a pianist and a singer called Michael Feinstein, I think he’s also played here by the way. I do prefer to be alone on stage though. I found about ten years ago that I had an audience in the US that I didn’t know about, and some of my British television shows went there. TL: Tell us a little about Dame Edna Everage, her famous talk show for instance. I remember Dame Edna always being there when I was a child in England. BH: I invented a comedy talk show Photo: Arts Centre Melbourne

Photo: Greg Gorman

The Interview – by Tess Larosse

Dame Edna meets Princess Diana.

with my persona Dame Edna about ten years ago, and Dame Edna likes to ask delving questions, things that people don’t usually talk about then. For example, she asked Julio Eglesias what his father did for a living. When Julio revealed that his father was a gaenacologist, Dame Edna was very excited about this and asked if he ever took his work home, and could be her gaenacologist. Julio then explained ‘’well his hand does shake rather a lot’’ to which Dame Edna replied ’’that’s Ok, I really don’t object to that!“ It’s nice to have a character that you can hide behind, one can say things - politically incorrect things that one dare not normally say. In a way that’s why the Americans like this, because they’re not used to having such things discussed. It’s a relief to them. TL: Do you have a special thing you like to do, or look forward to here ? BH: Well I don’t ski, because I can’t afford to break anything, and I’m not a bit sporty, so walking is what I like to do, but in the last five days I haven’t walked further from my house to the car! I like to walk in the winter, and especially between Saanen and Gstaad, and sit on one


Friday 26 August 2011 Page 13

ry work by an Austrian artist from the period of Klimt packed away in storage in London, and suddenly we found ourselves in this very, very brown space, so Lizzie, my wife and I worked extremely hard on it and turned it into this lovely light space and, as you can see NO geraniums ! TL: Do you get back to Australia much ? BH: Yes, I’m going back there for the advert and prostate awareness campaign, and then I have an art exhibition in Sydney, and I began life wanting to be a painter, I am an enthusiastic amateur painter, I should paint here… TL: What’s your idea of a perfect day here ? BH: Firstly, I’d have a walk down to Saanen for a coffee, followed by a piece of Mrs. Muller’s delicious quiche. Perhaps after that I’d wonder by the river over to Gstaad and walk along the Gstaad High Street,

and then maybe pop in to see Sonia over at the Lorenz Bach shop in case she has anything for the increasingly larger man – she’s a great girl Sonia , she makes me buy way too much ! Then if I have any strength left after that, I’ll wonder up past the Park Hotel and visit my

friend Aliki or some other friends, Stanley and Lisa, old friends from London and America. I really feel I could stay here and never go anywhere else, I totally relax here… Further reference: ‘’Handling Edna’’ by Barry Humphries www.dame-edna.com

Photo: Arts Centre Melbourne

of those lovely little benches. After the disaster of Ireland, I came here to write, and I wrote a whole novel in about four weeks, and I would walk that route with my notebook in the snow. It is so inspiring here, a great place for creative work, and you can go out to dinners as little or as often as you like. People here, I find are a little surprised that you’re working, but I’d take my little notebook along even in the depths of winter in the snow and sit on one of those little benches all wrapped up, and scribble away in my book, I love doing that. I also have wonderful new friendships that I really value here in this town. TL: It’s a great place you have here in Saanen. BH: Well when we got this little ‘’attic’’ the disadvantage was no lift, but the advantage was this huge, high space. We had all these paintings, large turn of the 20th centu-

LOCAL NEWS

Dame Edna and Barry Humphries.

Star photographer Michel Comte, ­appears in Gstaad gallery

Photo: zvg

On August 18, Swiss photographer Michel Comte attended an event in Gstaad hosted by art expert and gallery owner Irène Schönholzer and House of Chopard co-president KarlFriedrich Scheufele. The evening started with a presentation of Comte’s works that are on display at Schönholzer’s Galerie Lovers of Fine Arts

Michel Comte took this shot at midnight by moonlight.

and that are titled “Night Pictures of Lauenensee” from the series “Bernese Alps around Gstaad,” a project commissioned by Schönholzer. Later, customers, guests, and friends proceeded to a garden party at the Hotel Olden. The appearance of Michel Comte was anything but perfunctory and a source of pride for Schönholzer, who used much persistence and persuasion to reach and convince him to take the commission. A shoot of Gstaad‘s mountains and, in particular, Lauenensee in nocturnal light was an unusual challenge. The idea to shoot the series was born at Chopard’s annual jewelry and watch exhibit in Gstaad. Chopard’s Scheufele had expressed to Schönholzer a desire for unique images of Lauenensee and of the Bernese Alps near Gstaad, images that did not

seem to exist at that time, according to Schönholzer. And while Scheufele was prepared to support the artistic project, Schönholzer managed to win over one of the best photographers for the project, Michel Comte, known for his fashion photographs and portraits of stars like Penelope Cruz, Tina Turner, Sophia Loren, Carla Bruni, and Michael Schumacher. In addition, Comte has gained a reputation for his politically critical reportage in war-torn areas. He was happy to take Schönholzer job, because it was something completely new. During his visit to Gstaad, Comte— often referred to in the press as a jet setter—showed a yet-before-unseen side: a love of pure untouched nature and the pleasure in simple and original life. Even Comte‘s appearance was remar-

kable. He appeared in all-leather trousers, which he wears to walk, work and even to ski. ”One does not need anything else in the mountains,” Comte said. “With these pants, I can do everything here.” Relaxed, cheerful and accessible, he readily spoke with journalists and expressed his fascination with the remote, untouched part of Saanenland. He enjoyed his work in nature so much, that he has constantly been in the mountains since. “Irène Schönholzer’s commission gave me the impetus for my own ideas,” Comte said. As all rights for ”Bernese Alps near Gstaad“ belong to Galerie Lovers of Fine Art, Schönholzer is preparing a third series for exhibition. Translated and adapted by Diana Oehrli from the Article by Tina Dossot AVS 23.08.11


Events

Friday 26 August 2011 Page 14

Events Calendar ■■FRIDAYS: AUGUST 26, SEPTEMBER 2,

9, 16, 23, 30 & OCTOBER 7 & 14 Weekly market in Saanen from 08h00-12h00: Sale of local and fresh products from the region in the center of Saanen. For more info, contact +41 (0)33 744 74 48 or email saanen@gstaad.ch

■■FRIDAY, JULY 15 – SATURDAY,

­SEPTEMBER 3 55th Menuhin Festival Gstaad: A classical music festival with world-famous artists, throughout different venues in the Saanenland. For more info or reservations, contact +41 (0)33 748 83 38 or visit www.menuhinfestivalgstaad.com

■■FRIDAY, AUGUST 26 – SUNDAY,

­ EPTEMBER 11 S Exhibition of Giorgio Benedetti at Adler Jewelers, Gstaad. Exposition during opening hours. Contact +41 (0)33 744 66 80 for more info.

■■FRIDAY, AUGUST 26 – SUNDAY,

SEPTEMBER 11 Exhibition Cornament and Rime at Galerie Patricia Low, Gstaad.■ Contact +41 (0)33 744 88 04 for more info.

■■FRIDAY, AUGUST 26 – SUNDAY,

Friday August 26 2011 until Friday September 23 2011

■■FRIDAY, AUGUST 26 19h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Johann Strauss – Gala: Orchestral concert. Venue: Festival tent, Gstaad. Rate: SFr 65-160.

10h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Matinée des Jeunes étoiles VIII –Graf Mourja. Winner of Violin Masters Monte Carlo 2010. SFr 30. Venue: Gstaad Kapelle.

■■SATURDAY, AUGUST 27 19h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Slawische Romantik – Nikolaj Znaider & Ivan Fischer. Orchestral concert in the festival tent, Gstaad. Rate: SFr 65-160.

■■SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 3 19h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Tschaikowskys 4th – Sol Gabetta & Zubin Mehta. Rate SFr 65-160. Venue: Saanen church. ■■SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 3 11h00: Concert in the church of Saanen with the “Martinu” quartet of the Czech Republic. Venue: Saanen church. Free entry.

■■SATURDAY, AUGUST 27 10h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Matinée des Jeunes étoiles VII – Roustem Saïtkoulov. Rate: SFr 30. Venue: Kapelle Gstaad.

■■SUNDAY, AUGUST 28 16h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Mozart with and for children and young people. A family concert. Rate: Adults SFr 40, Children SFr 15. Venue: Festival tent, Gstaad.

■■WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 31 – SUNDAY,

SEPTEMBER 4 Gstaad Classic Audemans Piguet: Classic car rally with historic cars of all prestigious brands. Open for all amateurs. Venue: Region Gstaad-Saanenland. For more info, please visit www.gstaadclassic.com

AUGUST 28 ■■FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 2 17h00: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Gstaad 19h30: Menuhin Festival Gstaad: Pahud Vocal Academy. Cecilia Bartoli & Silvana Bazzoni plays Bach. Orchestral concert. Venue: Saanen Bartoli Public Master Class SFr 20. Final concert church. Rate: SFr 40-160. Sunday, 28 August at 17h00. SFr30. Venue: Kirchgemeindehaus, Gstaad. ■■SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER Gerax_SA_Gstaad_Life_206_139_mm_Layout 1 01.07.11 08:48 3Seite 1

■■FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 9 – SUNDAY, 11 Country Night Gstaad in the Gstaad Festival tent. Ticket reservation: Tel: +41 (0)33 744 88 22. ■■WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 21 Seniors day on the Rellerli, Schönried. Special menu SFr 15. Mountain railway ticket SFr 5. Reservation: +41 (0)33 748 87 22. ■■Rotary Club Gstaad-Saanenland Meetings every Monday 12h00■ Palace Hotel Gstaad (033 / 748 50 00), President: Rot. Alfred Liechti (033 / 722 42 22), Program: Rot. Gerhard Amiet (033 / 744 94 49)

■■Lions Club Gstaad-Saanenland Meetings normally each first and third week of the month on Thursdays, either at

12h00 a.m. for lunch or at 7h00 p.m. for dinner. Meetings in Wellness & Spa-Hotel ErmitageGolf, Schönried, Tel. 033 748 60 60. For details and program contact Victor Steimle, president, 033 748 78 88, steimle@tundr.ch, https://gstaad-saanenland.lionsclub.ch

■■Church Services St Peter’s English-Speaking Anglican Church, Château-d’Oex■ 27 August 2011, 10h00 – 12h00 ■ Open Church. Rev. Penny Frank 28 August 2011, 17h30 ■ Evening Prayer. Rev. Penny Frank Information: 026 924 60 92 Web: www.allsaints.ch/chateaudoex ■■Important Numbers Ambulance 144, Police 117 Police office 033 356 84 31 Fire-brigade 118 Saanen Hospital 033 748 02 00 Château-d‘Oex Hospital 026 923 43 43 Car accident service 033 744 88 80 Veterinary 033 744 35 31 / 033 744 06 61 Medical emergency 0900 57 67 47 Dental emergency 033 748 02 00 For additional useful numbers please visit www. gstaadlife.ch/usefulnumbers For the latest local weather forecast visit www.gstaadlife.com/weather

SALES I RENTALS I ADMINISTRATION THE ADDRESS FOR YOUR HOME IN GSTAAD SINCE 1970

Bissen Project, F. Frisardi

SINCE

1970

GERAX S.A. REAL ESTATE GSTAAD

Gschwendstrasse 2 I T +41 (0)33 748 45 50 I F +41 (0)33 748 45 51 I info@gerax.ch I www.gerax.ch


Friday 26 August 2011 Page 15

Column

A Manners Guide for the ­Nouveau Riche, Part Deux BY MANDOLYNA THEODORACOPULOS

In Part One of this guide, I encouraged the newly rich not to wear white. Many people, possibly some of them newly rich, objected. They were right in one sense: You can wear white, but only if you know how to wear white. When you don’t, it is simply easier to avoid it altogether. Herewith I elaborate on that point, as well as some other general etiquette rules and how to break them. WHITE DOS AND DON’TS - Men may not wear stiff white cotton jackets with black shirts unless they want to look like a cop on Miami Vice. - Under no circumstances should you wear white patent-leather shoes— except if you are Elvis or Liberace, and then only in the casket. Pat Boone will be permitted to wear them again once he’s dead. - Drive a white car only if it’s old, beaten up, or cheap. You may not roll in a white Rolls unless you are in Vegas or Monaco and you are being ridiculous on purpose. Diddy and Ay-rabs are exempt. - You may decorate your house in all white, but for Pete’s sake, make sure it doesn’t look like an Ian Schrager hotel. HOW TO EAT WITH YOUR HANDS - You may eat ribs or baby lambchops with your hands, but only if you can do it without looking like a beast. Children may eat chicken legs with their hands, but adults should refrain unless they are at a BBQ wearing socks with sandals and a Hawaiian shirt. Lobster can be eaten by hand, but try to keep the sucking sounds and greasy-finger look to a minimum, especially if you are overweight.

- Never lick your fingers, unless you need to lubricate. - Don’t eat anything else with your hands except asparagus. If you come from a country where eating with your hands is normal, I’m sorry for you. Learn to use a fork and knife unless you are at home. - Plump girls should not be seen in public eating bread, candy bars, or desserts ravenously. If you want to stuff a dozen cookies in your piehole when you’re home, that’s OK, but don’t buy them in a shop—order them over the Internet. HOW TO DRINK AND TAKE DRUGS - Women should never appear drunk in public. You may be tipsy, but never pushy. You look cheap enough as it is. - Men can drink as much as they like as long as they remain joyful à la Robert Benchley and never show a hint of aggression. - If you must do drugs, never speak about them and don’t do them with your very young grandchildren. Remember, keep it in the family, noseleak—but only adults in the family. HOW TO SHOW OFF - Fancy cars are for rappers. - If you have a chauffeur, don’t allow him to drive your Maserati or Porsche; keep him in your wife’s bedroom instead. - Bodyguards are not the new black. They’re out. To lunch. - Collect art and wine, but don’t hire someone to choose it for you, upstart. STYLE AND BEAUTY - Men should never, never, never dye their hair. Women can, but stick to your roots. If you’re Saudi, chestnut at best, no blonde. Red, pink, or

blue-black should be avoided unless you are a rock star. - No Hamiltans. Valentino Garavani, just a bit less orange, please, but we love you anyway. Lindsay Lohan spray tans are stupid like Lindsay Lohan. Fair is fairer. - Plastic surgery should only be for brave young men and women who have been disfigured in an accident or wounded in war. If you must fix a bad nose or get a breast lift, fine. But lip injections and too much Botox make you the Bride of Wildenstein. Period. - Don’t get tattooed after 25 unless you’re doing time. - Unless you worship Il Duce, don’t wear a black shirt. - Badly wrinkled linen suits can be very attractive, but you have to be very fat or very thin to carry it off. VACATIONING - Stay in your ethnic region. There is nothing more ludicrous than seeing thick-set, peasant-like Russians shopping in St. Moritz or Sardinia. WASPs should stay in Newport and Russkis in Crimea. - If you must leave your country, don’t wear a fanny pack and rubber sandals. Remember, when in Rome… FOOD AND WINE - Don’t eat food out of season. Eating oysters in July and August is like choosing to spend the summer in Jeddah. - There is nothing that guarantees your inclusion to the world’s most disgusting people like drinking expensive wine and champagne when it isn’t a special occasion. FOREIGNERS - When referring to Hellenes never

call them “Grecians” like Dubya did; they’re called “Greeks,” dimwit. - When an obese member of an ethnic minority begs for food, respond by suggesting they could do with a diet. - If you see a large contingent of blue-suited Chinamen near the UN in Manhattan, don’t hand them your laundry. SINE QUA NON - A lady or a gentleman never raises their voice unless there is a fire in a crowded movie theater. And even if there is, they always scream politely. - If your mother’s rich and no one knows who your father is, don’t use your mother’s last name like Amanda Hearst, Brandon Davis, or Paris Latsis. If you must change your name, downgrade. - Always be extremely gracious toward people less fortunate than yourself; you’ll be on your way down soon enough. - Never floss in public. - Never treat a woman like anything but a lady. - Never use the word “partner” unless you are planning to rob a bank. - Don’t carry a gun unless you are a professional athlete in the NFL or NBA. - No matter how ripped you are, no one wants to see your hirsute body at the table. Wear a shirt for lunch even if you’re on the beach. - American women: STOP walking around with a bottle of water in your hand or a cup from Starbucks! You’re killing the white race. - Muscles are medium class. Body building is O-U-T. - No public displays of affection. - Finally, if you have to leave, don’t go until you come back.



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Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.