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HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS

AIKEN-AUGUSTA’S MOST SALUBRIOUS NEWSPAPER • FOUNDED IN 2006

IT’S STILL A PIG

We all want to live a healthy life — probably even more so readers of this newspaper. So we try our best to buy healthful foods for ourselves and our families.

It’s not easy.

Take a stroll down the aisles of your favorite grocery store and you will be greeted with an almost constant onslaught of packaging strategies to convince you that the food behind

each label is wholesome, nutritious, healthful and well worth your hardearned money.

Sometimes it is. But not always.

Sometimes it isn’t, even when the label assures you — repeatedly — that it is.

As the saying goes, you can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.

Food labels don’t always make bold in-your-face claims that stretch the truth farther than a politician

JUNE 9, 2017

TRITION FE ATURE: P. 8 U N W E N

ever thinks of doing. Subtle works sometimes too.

Green colors on a label send the quiet message that the product inside this package is healthy, natural, and environmentally friendly. None of that may be true, and the label might not make a single health claim, but it might feature green, a log cabin or a mountain stream, and a brand name like “Kindly Old Aunt Clara’s Kitchen.”

How could that possibly be unhealthy?

As labels go, “All natural” is pretty sneaky. It sounds good, but it means next to nothing. Gravel is 100% all natural, but would you eat it?

According to USDA guidelines, an “all natural” product can still contain all kinds of additives, chemicals, genetically modified ingredients (GMOs), and even pesticides.

Please see STILL A PIG page 2

COMFORT AND QUALITY IS OUR

(706) 364.1163 • WWW.SCRUBSOFEVANS.COM • 4158 WASHINGTON RD • ACROSS FROM CLUB CAR • M-F: 10-6:30; SAT: 10-4

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

JUNE 9, 2017

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STILL A PIG… from page 1

TAG HEUER CARRERA CALIBRE HEUER 01

2365 Washington Road • 706.738.7777 www.windsorfinejewelers.com

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MEDICAL EXAMINER IS ONLINE • visit issuu.com/medicalexaminer •

Even the Holy Grail of All Natural Words — organic — doesn’t mean all that much. Labels that say “Organic” and “made with organic ingredients” identify products that are made of at least 70 percent certified organic ingredients.

What about the remaining 30 percent? It’s easy to see the big words “Organic” on the label; it takes a bit more time to read the label and find out the complete picture.

One solution: look for products labeled “100% USDA Organic,” Or it might not be a pig wearing to which much stricter lipstick after all. standards apply.

Misleading but technically honest packaging is rampant in the bread aisle, perhaps the single most creatively hyped food category. According to consumer advocate Clark Howard, a loaf of white bread might be disguised as a healthier version by the simple addition of some brown food coloring; he further notes that a single-grain bread might have a few random seeds sprinkled Not only are these Gummy Worms organic; they also across its top so it can be feature “Colors from Natural labeled as “multigrain.” To Sources.” And the package is cut through at least some of green and includes the word the hype, look for the “100% forest.

Whole Grain” icon on bread labels.

Howard also raises a red flag on terms like “freerange” or “grass-fed.” Unregulated by the USDA, they might mean 10,000 Yes, they may have the freedom to forage outdoors, chickens have access to a single 5 squarebut are they taking foot area of grass. advantage of it?

Or those chickens might spend 90% of their time out in the great outdoors. There’s no way of knowing for sure unless you’ve visited the company’s farms or somehow have personal knowledge of a company’s operations.

An excellent way to know what goes onto our plates and down the hatch is to buy as many groceries as possible at local farmer’s markets.

If you want to double-check anything they tell you, you might have to make a a 10-mile trip, not a 500-mile trip.

As the Cheerios caption (right) says, a product’s best features Cheerios often get high marks from dietitians, but the cereal aisle is are “naturally” going to be prominently displayed where anything good gets splashed on the package front. But across the front of the box and sometimes there is a trade- everything bad appears elsewhere in fine print. off which cancels out the benefit of the good stuff. For example, a product might be justifiably proud that it is fat-free, and the packaging will announce that in bold, bright colors. Elsewhere — the dry, uninteresting black & white Nutrition Facts label, for example — you may discover that the sugar content of the product is off Concerned about the charts. Conversely, a sugar-free how much sucrose, product might be high in fat. With a few dextrose and high moments of conscientious label reading, fructose sweeteners a savvy shopper can find the product are in sodas? Then that offers the best combination of choose one “made with real sugar.” assets and negatives.

For the record, the Medical Examiner is not trying to state or even imply that any of the products pictured on this page are unhealthy or that they are guilty of deceptive labeling. They are shown here simply to illustrate common labeling practices that catch the eye as we shop for groceries, but that often deserve a bit of additional Fortunately for investigation. We might discover we’ve been buying cleverly health-conscious shoppers, these marketed products that aren’t as wholesome as we had Hostess CupCakes thought.

Given the choice between eating healthy and just thinking feature orange we’re eating healthy — well, that’s an easy choice isn’t it? + “Natural Flavor.”

JUNE 9, 2017

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

The

Advice Doctor ©

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One family of providers.

Everything you need.

2541 Milledgeville Road, Augusta, GA • (706) 738-2581

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Dear Advice Doctor, I’m not wealthy by any means, but even so I do a modest amount of investing and have developed a decent little portfolio. To make this work at my income level, I keep a finger on the pulse of the markets almost every day. Several of my friends have noticed this and some think I’m a reckless gambler while others seem to think I’m secretly wealthy. A few have actually asked me for loans. What’s the best way to handle this situation?

— Man of (Modest) Means Dear Man, At the risk of preaching to the choir, more people should be doing exactly what you do. In fact, I just saw a patient last week whose heart rate was so fast it was like a double workload for her poor heart. If she just did what you do — keep a finger on the pulse — she would have been aware and could have gotten treatment sooner.

Of course, heartbeats can be slow, too. Or fast one day and slow the next, which is called arrythmia. Under normal circumstances, a resting heart rate is usually somewhere between 60 and 100 beats per minute. A pulse below 60 is called bradycardia (although a slow heartbeat during sleep, or for some highly conditioned athletes is not necessarily abnormal).

A rapid heartbeat, on the other hand, is called tachycardia, a condition where the heart may beat as high as 300 times a minute for no legitimate reason (such as while running a marathon). The chambers of the heart can’t possibly fi ll with blood that quickly, so all that extra work doesn’t really accomplish a lot. The lungs and brain can even be damaged by lack of oxygen.

All three situations — palpitations or arrythmia, tachycardia or bradycardia — often stem from the heart’s electrical system. It’s very important to see a doctor and have the issue addressed. And it all starts — just as you are doing — by knowing your heart rate, keeping a finger on your pulse. Good job! + Do you have a question for The Advice Doctor about life, love, personal relationships, career, raising children, or any other important topic? Send it to News@AugustaRx.com. Replies will be provided only in Examiner issues.

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MEDICAL EXAMINER

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AIKEN-AUGUSTA’S MOST SALUBRIOUS NEWSPAPER

www.AugustaRx.com The Medical Examiner’s mission: to provide information on topics of health and wellness of interest to general readers, to offer information to assist readers in wisely choosing their healthcare providers, and to serve as a central source of news within every part of the Augusta medical community.

Submit editorial content to graphicadv@knology.net Direct editorial and advertising inquiries to: Daniel R. Pearson, Publisher & Editor E-mail: Dan@AugustaRx.com AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER P.O. Box 397, Augusta, GA 30903-0397

(706) 860-5455 www.AugustaRx.com • E-mail: graphicadv@knology.net Opinions expressed by the writers herein are their own and/or their respective institutions. Neither the Augusta Medical Examiner, Pearson Graphic 365 Inc., or its agents or employees take any responsibility for the accuracy of submitted information, which is presented for general informational purposes only. For specific medical advice, diagnosis and treatment, consult your doctor.

The appearance of advertisements in this publication does not constitute an endorsement of the products or services advertised. © 2017 PEARSON GRAPHIC 365 INC.

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

#45 IN A SERIES

OLD NEWS

Who is this?

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POINTS OF INTEREST TO FORMER KIDS

by Trisha Whisenhunt, Senior Citizens Council

MARRYING LATER IN LIFE: 20 QUESTIONS

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nfortunately, this medical pioneer belongs to an elite group of researchers, but a group that is far too large.

In fact, a book entitled American Martyrs to Radiology was written about this group, and each person profiled died from exposure to X-rays and radiation before their dangers were known. Its author, Percy Brown, M.D., (1875-1950) was himself “a pioneer and martyr to the science of roentgenology,” as his obituary noted. “Many a scientist has suffered death as a result of ...radioactive damage,” Brown wrote about 5 years before his death. “Thus far, I have been fortunate enough to escape, though my physical handicaps, because of injuries such as excisions and amputations, have been many.” Having survived into the atomic bomb era, Brown estimated his lifetime exposure to radiation as no different than “had I been an experimental Bikini goat.”

His fate was similar to Walter Dodd’s, the gentleman pictured above, although Dodd took an amazingly unusual path into the field of medical imaging, and succumbed to radiation sooner.

Born in London on April 22, 1869, Walter Dodd was sent to Boston at age 10 to be raised by his married older sister. The family was not well off, and after a few years of schooling and a few years working at a tea company, young Walter was ready for something different: the life of a sailor.

His Sunday School teacher learned of his plans and tried to dissuade him from them, enlisting the help of her cousin, Charles Eliot, who just happened to be President of Harvard University.

And the rest is history. (Not really.)

Eliot got a job at Harvard for the teenaged Dodd with this prestigious title: Assistant Janitor.

Aside from cleaning and sweeping in a lab, the position required setting up students’ experiments, which were mainly in chemistry. Dodd ended up doing all the same experiments students were doing and regularly attended general chemistry lectures. Noting his innate intelligence, one of his professors had him take the examinations required to pass the Chemistry course. Dodd passed, and the professor noted “he profited more... than most of our matriculated students.”

His career as a janitor (1887-1892) over, Dodd was immediately named assistant apothecary at Mass General Hospital; then registered pharmacist and chief apothecary in 1894; and the key post in 1895: an additional appointment as the hospital’s official photographer. That same year he heard the first amazing reports about Roentgen and his photographs of bones and other internal body structures, and before 1986 ended Dodd had installed Mass General’s first X-ray machine.

A 1918 biography of Dodd said “his suffering began almost immediately,” within a month of the machine’s installation, with severe dermatitis resembling acute sunburn. By the following April, Dodd’s face and hands looked like they had been scalded, and the pain “was beyond description.” X-rays were not suspected. In all, Dodd underwent some 50 surgeries to treat his radiation burns. He never stopped working — cheerfully, by all accounts — until the very end, which came on December 18, 1916. By then he was an instructor at Harvard, and in private practice with Percy Brown, the Martyrs author and “Bikini goat” guinea pig quoted above. +

’m not a romantic but I do believe love can come at any age. I worked with a 76 year-old woman who married last year. There are many reasons for marrying later in life and they vary between men and women but the end result is the same.

Most people don’t want to be alone. Marriage is a huge game changer and should be considered seriously. When we are younger, we are often told to wait. When we are more mature, time becomes a factor and we decide more quickly.

There are some things that should be considered no matter where you are chronologically. Here are 20 questions you may want to ask yourself and answer honestly before diving off the deep end.

1. Is for better or worse making me better or worse?

2. Do we really accept one another?

3. Who am I? 4. Am I happy to be in this relationship?

5. Am I feeling trapped?

6. What am I doing to hold us back? Why? 7. Is this relationship

balanced?

8. Can we have fun together?

9. Can we have fun apart?

10. Why am I in this relationship?

11. Where is this going?

12. Do I really trust my partner?

13. Am I with a good person?

14. Am I attracted to my partner?

15. Am I a parent or a partner?

16. Does my partner have my back?

17. Are we looking in the same direction?

18. Are we growing together?

19. Am I still me?

20. What is my gut telling me?

If your honest answers to these questions result in positive responses, it would seem you are on the right track. Even if marriage isn’t the end goal, just wanting to have a healthy relationship,

whether it’s a live-in situation, just dating or companionship, you want to make certain it’s a good fit.

Sad to say, you are never too old for domestic abuse, and often a partner who seems wonderful at fi rst can show his/her true nature later and it may be a nasty surprise. In such cases, you want to get out of the relationship as soon as possible. Ask for help if you need to. Gentlemen, domestic abuse does include you as well, so don’t be embarrassed to get help if needed. The professionals who deal with this problem see it happen for both women and men.

Finances can play an important role in any pairing and should be given serious consideration. If you have unanswered questions about who pays for what, whether or not a bank account or property should be joint, wills, pre-nuptial agreement or estate planning of any kind should be dealt with in conjunction with an attorney or estate planner.

While this isn’t the most romantic side of entering into a marriage, it deserves the most attention from a practical point. If things do go sideways in the end, it’s better to be alone with the ability to support yourself than not. +

MYTH OF THE MONTH A migraine is just a really bad headache A migraine and an ordinary headache are the same like an Indy 500 racecar and a 4-cylinder Yugo are the same: there are definite similarities, but major differences, too.

A common, ordinary headache is often a tension headache that involves the muscles and fascia of the neck and scalp tightening, triggering the headache. It is a fairly simple cause-and-effect.

A migraine, on the other hand, involves an extremely complicated constellation of issues that is still under study. Some researchers point to chemical changes in the brain as the trigger; others say the chemistry of the entire body is affected. A headache can come and go in less than an hour, conquered by an aspirin or two;

a migraine can last for days despite a battery of high-powered drugs taken to fight it.

As the question implies, pain level is another major difference. A headache can be a minor dull throb; a migraine can cause severe off-thecharts pain. Unlike a headache, a migraine can bring with it a whole army of additional symptoms.

All of this means one thing: if you experience migraine headaches, by all means seek medical care. + — by F. E. Gilliard, MD, Family Medicine 4244 Washington Road, Evans, GA 30809 706-760-7607

JUNE 9, 2017

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

WHAT EVERYBODY OUGHT TO KNOW res? k good eno r skin can ugh cer? son.”

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o k

e got electricity in our home when I was 6. A year later, my father bought a TV. People in town had TVs with a single antenna atop a tall, 2-inch metal water pipe.

Their channel changer was simple. The man of the house went outside and, regardless of the inclement weather, fitted a two-foot monkey wrench on the pipe, braced both feet, and with the full weight of his body turned the entire apparatus until his wife beat on the window to let him know it was pointed toward either Jacksonville or Albany, the only two stations strong enough to reach that far out in the flat woods. With directions from the wife, the man-and-monkeywrench channel changer worked perfectly.

But my father could not leave well enough alone. He had to innovate. He mounted two antennas on a single pole, one pointed toward Jacksonville and the other toward Albany. When my mother wanted the channel changed, she simply told me to run over to the TV and turn the knob from 2 to 8 or vice versa. Would modern wonders ever cease? Therefore, by the time I was 7, we rendered obsolete the full-grown-manand-monkey-wrench channel changer. We were decades ahead of technology.

Nowadays we have remotes of every size and shape imaginable. And we have more channels than a Hollywood starlet has had pelvic affiliates.

We can change channels by voice command.

ABOUT CHANGES MISTAKENLY CALLED IMPROVEMENTS But does that make TV better? Probably not. Oh sure, the picture and sound quality is better, but is the content or the effect on our children better? Are our kids better off learning from Roy Rogers and Superman? Or from Dog the Bounty Hunter and Real Housewives reality shows?

If you have to think longer than 15 seconds to answer that, you have failed the first of only two questions on the Bad Billy Laveau Survey Test for Moral Stupidity. (The second question is unimportant and not counted in your final score.)

Our world is like that. When we have something that works perfectly, some fool will figure out a way to “improve” it without careful consideration for the unintended consequences.

Take buggy whips and horse-drawn carriages. They worked just fine. But then along came Henry Ford and his assembly line black Model A Ford cars. The buggy whip industry disappeared. So did carriage manufacturers.

Granted, cars are faster, cooler in the summer and warmer in the winter. But now we are dependent on imported oil. We have a new form of death and mayhem: MVA. For those of you who failed the first question above, that stands for Motor Vehicle Accident. Then came DUI. Both led to several new industries: Emergency Rooms. Court appearances.

Delinquent car payments. Repo Joe. Car insurance. Muffler shops. Quick oil change shops.

Window tinting shops. Rubber

E TH

Bes tires. Let’s not forget eventual deafness secondary to mobile mega-decibel radios and CD players with subwoofers so low and powerful they are measured on the Richter scale.

All are high-dollar penalties we pay for progress.

(We won’t go into drive-by shootings, high-speed chases, illegal drug transportation, etc.)

Would we be better off if we went back to the era of buggies and monkey wrench channel changers? Certainly we would be more inconvenienced, but we might be the better for it.

Just look at the Amish. They seem to be doing OK without many worldly conveniences.

Have you ever heard of an Amish drive-by shooting? A multiple buggy pileup due to fog? Fatalities due to a highspeed buggy chase? A child chasing a ball getting run over by a buggy?

Medicine is vulnerable to innovation, too. Used to be, if you smoked cigarettes you eventually got chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and/or lung cancer and spent a year or so smothering to death if a heart attack did not end your misery and get you first.

Technology has given us

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Augusta’s only independent publication dedicated to medicine, health and wellness

all sorts of new medications, X-rays, blood tests, pulmonary function studies, nuclear scans, etc.

So what is our benefit from all this progress? These days if you smoke cigarettes you will eventually get chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and/or lung cancer and spend four or five years smothering to death if a heart attack does not end your misery and get you first.

Sound familiar? You get to live with a terminal disease longer. Your family gets to watch you die more slowly. It costs a lot more. But dead you still are. The only change is the financial cost, the technology, and the emotional cost to your family.

Bottom line: if you do stupid things like smoking cigarettes,

Bad Billy Laveau is a formerlyretired MD who wields a pointed sense of humor - and now, tongue depressors too. He speaks and entertains at events for audiences not subject to cardiac arrest secondary to overwhelming laughter and glee.

BadBilly@knology.net or 706306-9397.

F REE T AKE-HO ME CO PY!

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MEDICAL EXAMINER

William S. Morris III Founder, chairman and CEO of Morris Communications and publisher of The Augusta Chronicle.

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HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS

AIKEN-AUGUSTA’S MOST SALUBRIOUS NEWSPAPER • FOUNDED IN 2006

JUNE 9, 2017

This newspaper is delivered to more than

883 private practice doctor’s offices and to 14 area hospitals.

The Augusta Medical Examiner’s publisher, Daniel Pearson, has continuously published a newspaper in Augusta since 1990, longer than any other publisher in Augusta except the gentleman to the right, publisher of The Augusta Chronicle, “The South’s Oldest Newspaper,” founded in 1785.

We’re still wet behind the ears, but proud to have served Augusta area readers for more than a quarter of a century.

ine c i d E tM

now as then you will get your just reward. But now it takes longer and costs more.

Am I being too morbidly fatalistic here? I think not.

Death is a normal part of life. We all do it. The only difference is how we do it and what the trappings are.

Death is a perfect, dignified end to a terminal disease: no more pain; no more suffering; no more financial or emotional toll.

Modern technology makes death more high tech, but does it change or improve the outcome? You must answer that one for yourself. No one said I had to tell you everything you ought to know. +

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We are Aiken-Augusta’s Most Salubrious Newspaper

Clinically proven. Doctor recommended.

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JUNE 9, 2017

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

The

Money

Doctor COMING UP IN OUR NEXT ISSUE

Because wallets should be healthy too

IT’S A QUESTION OF CARE What is the best way to talk to aging parents about money?

Here are some of the best ways to talk to your parents about money so that they will be cared for in their later years.

• Ask how they would like their care to be delivered when that time comes.

• Do they want to live at home?

• Would they consider assisted living?

• Do they want to move in with you or want you to move in with them and help provide their care?

Perhaps they’ve thought about this and perhaps they haven’t, but this can begin a conversation about what their expectations are and what you know you can or cannot provide. Care is very expensive, and if you talk with your parents about the way they want the care delivered, then you are better able to plan to appropriately pay for that care.

If your parents are still young enough, you can encourage them to purchase long-term care insurance, which is a great way to assist in paying for care when the time arrives. These policies can be expensive but wellworth the premiums if and when you need to utilize the policy.

• This is a great time as well to talk in general about your parents’ estate and if

they have all of their affairs in order regarding their estate.

You should be aware if you have been assigned power of attorney to handle their affairs and to also make their healthcare decisions.

You might ask to go to an appointment with their attorney and/or accountant or financial planner with them, so that you can have an accurate sense of their financial situation if they are willing to share that at this time.

Knowledge is power: When you’re faced with decisions about care, you can make the best ones when you are educated and knowledgeable. + For the last decade, Amy Hane has been committed to serving the CSRA community by guiding those going through mental, physical and social issues related to caring for an aging or disabled loved one. She assists families with transitions to higher quality care for the safety and wellbeing of all involved.

Amy holds both Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees from the University of South Carolina, is a licensed Master Social Worker in South Carolina and Georgia, an Advanced Professional Aging Life Care Manager and also a Certified Advanced Social Work Case Manager.

if your business or medical practice would like to join the

select company of advertisers on our pages - or just get additional information CALL US SOON. AVAILABLE SPACE IS LIMITED.

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JUNE 9, 2017

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

Southern Girls Eat Clean Tomato Cucumber Salad — with a twist I’m sure if you grew up anywhere in the South you remember an abundance of fresh tomatoes and cucumbers in the summer. When I was growing up we always had a platter of sliced tomatoes, cucumbers and cantaloupe at every meal. Even for breakfast!

I also remember the yummy Tomato Cucumber Salad that my mom would put together as a side dish. Tomatoes, cucumbers and onions marinated in an oil and vinegar dressing. You can always find this dish at any church potluck or family get-together. I’m sure that this dish will be on many a Southern table throughout the coming summer. It’s a fresh and healthy recipe that is super easy to prepare.

Of course, I love the freshness of the traditional salad, but I had to give it my own twist. I added a bit more flavor with the Kalamata olives, feta cheese and oregano. I also used a sprializer for the cucumbers instead if simply slicing them, and I think it made the salad Tomato Cucumber Salad more visually appealing. If you don’t have a spiralizer, cheese crumbles to the bowl • 1/4 cup of extra virgin olive slice the cucumbers any way and give all the ingredients a oil you choose. good stir to mix well.

• 3 Tbsp. of red wine vinegar This dish is so versatile.

In a small separate bowl • 1-2 tsp. of agave nectar I recently served this as an whisk together the olive • 1/2 tsp. of dried oregano appetizer with toasted pita oil, red wine vinegar, agave • 1/4 tsp. of garlic powder bread before dinner. nectar, garlic powder, • 1/4 tsp. of salt ( I used Real Give this fresh and healthy oregano, salt and pepper.

Salt brand) salad a try this summer. I’m Pour the dressing over the • 1/4 tsp. of cracked black sure you’ll love it! veggies and toss to coat well. pepper Ingredients: • 3 or 4 medium English cucumbers, spiralized or sliced (English cucumbers have a thinner peel) • 1 pint grape tomatoes, sliced in half • 1/4 red onion, sliced very thin • 1/3 cup sliced Kalamata olives • 1/4 - 1/3 cup Feta cheese crumbles

Instructions: Wash and spiralize or slice the cucumbers, leaving the peel on. Place into a large mixing bowl.

Wash and slice the grape tomatoes in half and place into the bowl with the cucumber.

Slice the red onion very thinly and place into the bowl with the other veggies.

Add the olives and feta

Place in the fridge and allow to marinate at least an hour before serving. + Alisa Rhinehart is half of the blog southerngirlseatclean. com. She is a working wife and mother living in Evans, Georgia.

Visit her blog for more recipes and information on clean eating.

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OUR NEWSSTANDS Medical locations: • Children’s Hospital of Georgia, Harper Street, Main Lobby • Department of Veterans Affairs Medical Ctr, 15th St., Main Entrance • Dept. of Veterans Affairs Med. Center, Uptown Div., Wrightsboro Rd., main lobby • Doctors Hospital, 3651 Wheeler Rd, ER Lobby Entrance • Eisenhower Hospital, Main Lobby, Fort Gordon • George C. Wilson Drive (by medical center Waffle House and mail boxes) • Georgia War Veterans Nursing Home, main lobby, 15th Street • Augusta U. Hospital, 1120 15th Street, South & West Entrances • Augusta U. Medical Office Building, Harper Street, Main Entrance • Augusta U. Medical Office Building, Harper Street, Parking Deck entrance • Augusta U. Hospital, Emergency Room, Harper Street, Main Entrance • Select Specialty Hospital, Walton Way, Main entrance lobby • Trinity Hospital, Wrightsboro Road, main lobby by elevators • Trinity Hospital Home Health, Daniel Village, main lobby • University Health Federal Credit Union/ University Hospital Human Resources, 1402 Walton Way • University Hospital, 1350 Walton Way, Emergency Room lobby area • University Hospital, 1350 Walton Way, Outside Brown & Radiology/Day Surgery • University Hospital - Columbia County, 465 N. Belair Road, Main Lobby • University Hospital Prompt Care, 3121 Peach Orchard Road, Augusta

Around town: • Barney’s Pharmacy, 2604 Peach Orchard Rd. • Birth Control Source, 1944 Walton Way • GRU Summerville Student Bookstore • Blue Sky Kitchen, 990 Broad Street • Columbia County Library, main branch lobby, Ronald Reagan Drive, Evans • Enterprise Mill (North Tower), 1450 Greene Street, Augusta • Daniel Village Barber Shop, Wrightsboro Road at Ohio Ave. • Family Y (Old Health Central), Broad Street, downtown Augusta • Hartley’s Uniforms, 1010 Druid Park Ave, Augusta • International Uniforms, 1216 Broad Street, Augusta • Marshall Family Y, Belair Rd, Evans • Parks Pharmacy, Georgia Avenue, North Augusta • Southside Family Y, Tobacco Road, Augusta • Surrey Center, Surrey Center Pharmacy, Highland Avenue, Augusta • Top-Notch Car Wash, 512 N. Belair Road, Evans • Wild Wing Cafe, 3035 Washington Road, Augusta

Plus more than 875 doctors offices throughout the area for staff and waiting rooms, as well as many nurses stations and waiting rooms of area hospitals.

JUNE 9, 2017

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

ASK DR. KARP

NO NONSENSE

NUTRITION Nancy from Martinez asks “What is the ‘Ask Dr. Karp’ column all about?”

Thanks, Nancy. Your question gives me an opportunity to say hello to everyone in the Augusta River Region and to briefly explain what the Medical Examiner

and I hope to accomplish with this column.

This column has grown out of my frustration when reading and hearing so much non-scientific, purely anecdotal nutrition and diet information out there, information with the direct or indirect intent of selling a product, a book, a diet, etc.

This column will provide a place for people to get some scientific, evidenced-based information about food, diet and nutrition.

“Ask Dr. Karp” will give you a means to ask your questions and get “nononsense” answers. If you have a question about food, diet or nutrition, simply post or private message your question on Facebook - www.

Facebook.com/AskDrKarp - or email your question to askdrkarp@gmail.com Feel free to “friend” the Warren Karp (AskDrKarp) Facebook page. If your question is chosen for a column, your name will be changed to insure your privacy.

Please feel free to ask me any questions about food, diet, nutrition and preventive health behaviors.

Occasionally, I will review some local restaurants, giving you ideas for choosing great-tasting and healthier food options. Sometimes a column will contain recipes for “Feng Shui Cooking.”

“Feng Shui Cooking” is an eating approach that I have created and support. It involves not only buying and preparing healthy food, but also presenting and eating the food in a peaceful, aesthetic, natural and balanced environment.

You may find out more about me and find the download site for the public domain eBook Nutrition for Smarties at www. wbkarp.com I receive no funding for writing any of my columns, articles or books, and I have no financial or other interests in any food, book, nutrition product or company. My only interest is in providing freely-available, evidenced-based, scientific nutrition knowledge and

education. The information in these columns is for learning and education, and is not meant to be used to diagnose, manage or treat any person. Although I am a Professor Emeritus at Augusta University, the views and opinions expressed in this column are mine and mine alone and do not reflect the views and opinions of Augusta University or anyone else.

Finally, I did want to mention that, in conjunction with this “Ask Dr. Karp” column in the Medical Examiner, I am happy to come, as time permits, to your civic group, club or organization and give a lunchtime or dinner talk about diet, food and nutrition. I do this at no charge within 25 miles of Augusta, so let me know if you are interested.

I look forward to writing these columns and to getting to know each of you, personally, through your Facebook and email questions and comments. +

Have a question about food, diet or nutrition? Simply post or private message your question on Facebook - www.Facebook.com/AskDrKarp or email your question to askdrkarp@gmail.com If your question is chosen for the column, your name will be changed, to insure your privacy. Warren B. Karp, Ph.D., D.M.D. is Professor Emeritus at Augusta University. He has served as Director of the Nutrition Consult Service at The Dental College of Georgia, for over twenty years and is past Vice Chair of the Columbia County Board of Health. You can fi nd out more about Dr. Karp at www.wbkarp.com Dr. Karp obtains no funding for writing his columns, articles or books and has no fi nancial or other interests in any food, book, nutrition product or company. His interest is only in providing public domain, evidenced-based, scientific nutrition knowledge and education. Although Dr. Karp is a Professor Emeritus at Augusta University, the views and opinions expressed here are his and his alone and do not reflect the views and opinions of Augusta University or anyone else.

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Dr. Karp

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Give them a call or a visit today and tell them thanks for their support

JUNE 9, 2017

9+

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

Ask a Dietitian

Historic Stylish Living

HOW MUCH PROTEIN DO I NEED EACH DAY?

by Bethany M. Suddreth, MS, RD, LDN

As a Registered Dietitian, that is a question I get asked a lot. Whether you are a professional athlete, a cancer patient, a person who has heart disease, or just a normal, healthy person trying to stay fit, it is important that you are consuming adequate protein.

Protein is a large, complex molecule made of up amino acids. There are many types of proteins that play important roles in our body’s cells that are required for the structure, function and regulation of tissues. Just like any other nutrient, the amount of protein that you need is very individualized.

It is important to be sure you are getting your protein from high quality sources and you are spreading your protein intake throughout the day in order to optimize the body’s absorption and utilization.

The following is a high protein meal plan, providing an estimated 100g of protein packed into one day: • Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 slice of whole wheat toast, 1 cup fresh strawberries, 1 cup skim milk Snack: 1⁄4 cup almonds, 1 small apple • Lunch: 1 turkey sandwich with 2 oz (2 slices) turkey on whole wheat bread, small salad with 2 cups of romaine lettuce and 1 cup of mixed vegetables, 2 TBSP olive oil, 1 TBSP vinegar Snack: 1 cup of celery and 2 TBSP hummus • Dinner: 3 oz chicken (small boneless, skinless breast, the size of a deck of cards), 1⁄2 cup of green beans, 1⁄2 cup carrots, 1⁄2 cup brown rice Snack: 6 oz plain low fat Greek yogurt, 1⁄4 cup granola, 1⁄4 cup raisins The amount of protein you need depends on things like your weight and state of health. The Recommended Dietary Allowance (or RDA, the estimated amount considered necessary for the maintenance of good health) of protein per day is about 46 grams per day for adult women (71 grams if pregnant or breastfeeding) and about 56 grams per day for adult

men. The RDA for protein for babies and toddlers is about 10 grams; for school-age kids it’s 19-34 grams (depending on their age and size), and 46 and 52, respectively, for teenage girls and boys.

People with chronic disease such as cancer or heart failure may have increased protein requirement as well. For endurance and strength athletes, and recreational athletes, protein recommendations are also higher than average.

An upper limit for protein has not been established, but the acceptable range is a minimum of 10% of daily calories from protein up to a maximum of 35% of total daily calories from protein.

For those whose calorie intake is limited, a high protein diet may displace other important nutrients.

Also, high protein intake can impair renal function. It’s normally not a problem for healthy people, but for those with impaired renal function, such as people with chronic kidney disease not yet on dialysis, lower protein intake is recommended.

Another thing to consider is when to eat protein. Since the body doesn’t store protein, spreading intake throughout the day, pairing protein with carbohydrate sources, is most beneficial. This is particularly important for older individuals who are resistant to muscle protein synthesis. It is also beneficial to consume protein in combination with carbohydrates soon after exercise to replenish glycogen stores and build/ repair muscle.

A registered dietitian can

help you develop a plan that will give you adequate calories with a balance in carbohydrates, fats and protein each day.

Foods High in Protein • 3 oz. skinless grilled chicken breast (25 g protein) • 3 oz. turkey breast (24 g protein) • 3 oz. salmon (19 g protein) • 3 oz. Lean beef (22 g protein) • 1⁄2 cup canned tuna in water (19.5 g protein) • 1 large egg (6 g protein) • 1 cup cottage cheese (27 g protein) • 6 oz plain non-fat Greek yogurt (17 grams of protein) • 1 cup skim milk (8 g protein) Please see PROTEIN page 10

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Questions.

And answers.

On page 3.

+ 10

Part Q of a 26-part series

PROTEIN… from page 9 • 1 oz. Almonds (6 g protein) • 1⁄2 cup lentils (18 g protein) • 1⁄2 cup raw oats (13 g protein) • 1⁄2 cup quinoa (4 g protein) Note: a 3 oz serving of meat/ poultry is about the size of a deck of cards or the palm of your hand To determine how much protein you are getting from a food product with a Nutrition Facts label, fi rst look at the serving size, then multiply the number of servings you eat or plan to eat by the grams of protein per serving listed.

As an example, there are 24 grams of protein in 4 oz serving of a food. If a person eats two servings (8 oz), that would provide 48 grams of protein, about 100% of the RDA of protein for an average woman.

JUNE 9, 2017

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

Resources: • http://www.todaysdietitian. com/newarchives/060114p22. shtml • https://ghr.nlm.nih. gov/primer/howgeneswork/ protein • https://www.acsm. org/docs/default-source/ brochures/protein-intake-foroptimal-muscle-maintenance. pdf • http://www.eatright. org/resource/fitness/sportsand-performance/fuelingyour-workout/protein-and-theathlete • https://www.ncbi.nlm. nih.gov/pmc/articles/ PMC2760315/ • http://jn.nutrition.org/ content/130/7/1868S.full

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FAKE MEDICINE

It’s a crying shame that in our last issue we had a space shortage and were not able to include the usual installment of this alphabetical series.

As you no doubt recall, the previous letter appeared (in the May 12 issue) as “P is for Placebo.”

Q is for Quackery is the perfect follow-up topic.

They are practically kissing cousins. A placebo is a deliberately ineffective medicine, and so is quack medicine. One is legal and ethical when used as intended, the other is illegal and fraudulent when used as intended.

Mention quack medicine and some people will conjure up images of a traveling patent medicine salesman of more than a century ago, plying the back roads in his horse-drawn wagon, stopping at farmhouses and villages to sell his healing tonics and miracle cures.

That was then. Quack medicine today travels the invisible highways of the internet to land at your house via email with a daily stream of amazing promises: Miracle diabetes cure announced! Drink this and double your IQ! Recapture your lost libido! Miracle baldness cure found! Conquer stubborn belly fat! Cancer cure discovered! End snoring forever!

But wait! There’s more!

Arthritis cured overnight! Lose those extra pounds that no diet has ever removed before!

Throw away your eyeglasses! Prostate troubles banished! Memory problems solved! Instant breast enlargements! Vitamin concoctions that can cure or prevent almost anything are available. Diagnostic devices are available that outperform any doctor and his mere 12+ years of medical schooling. Say goodbye to digestive problems!

These sales pitches would not proliferate like they do without a constant supply of willing customers, either hopelessly gullible or hopelessly desperate for anything that might offer relief.

If you were to poll a sampling of people who have sent their hard-earned dollars off to the sponsor of a cure with an 800 number or website as its front door, you might be surprised by the results. A fairly significant number — perhaps small, but far more than one would expect — will report that the miracle product worked.

That is not surprising. The power of the human mind is arguably the strongest medicine there is. Countless experiments into the fascinating world of placebos have proved as much.

Take a new drug being tested for its effectiveness in fighting pain, depression or anxiety. Half of the participants in a clinical study will get the real thing, the other half a harmless placebo.

When all the results are in, significant numbers of the people who received the placebo will say they experienced major relief from their pain, depression or anxiety.

Quackery testimonials from satisfied customers may be fake, or they may be genuine. In fact, sellers of so-called snake oil are notoriously difficult to prosecute for the same reason. One may be a heartless criminal willing to take the last dollar from sick and vulnerable customers while the next one is a true believer in the effectiveness of whatever he’s selling.

It must be added that some of the most dramatic discoveries and innovations in healthcare down through the centuries were initially discounted as wishful thinking or downright fraud and subsequently ignored for decades, sometimes centuries, before finally being recognized as solid medicine.

One of the ironies of this subject is that many of the people most likely to be duped by quack medicine distrust the conventional medical establishment. They may be more likely to believe in various conspiracy theories than the average person. As a result, they revoke their confidence in a strictly regulated (though admittedly imperfect) industry populated by highly educated professionals and transfer it to the lady down the road who used to sell Tupperware but now is selling a miracle cure for (fill in the blank). +

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JUNE 9, 2017

11 +

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

The blog spot From the Bookshelf — posted by Chad Hayes, MD, on June 2, 2017

IT’S TIME FOR KIDS TO STOP DRINKING FRUIT JUICE. HERE’S WHY. A few thousand years ago, a talking snake convinced a child to pick a piece of fruit, squeeze it really hard, and drink whatever came out. The kid liked it, obviously, because what’s not to like about juice? So the next day at preschool, he told all his friends to ask their parents for juice, too. Some of them said the magic word; others just whined until their parents gave in. And we all know what happened from there.

Maybe that’s not really how it went down, but lots of parents give their kids juice. But here’s the thing: nobody needs juice.

Why not? Because it’s sugar water. The fact that the sugar came from an apple/orange/pear/whatever doesn’t make it healthier. Sugar cubes and high fructose corn syrup come from plants, too, and nobody argues that those are good for kids.

If you look at the nutrition facts for juice, you’ll find that an 8 oz serving contains about 120 calories. That’s 20 percent more than the same volume of Dr. Pepper, and roughly 10 percent of the daily calories a 3 year old needs, with essentially no nutritional value. But for some reason, it’s become a staple of the American child’s diet.

That needs to stop.

The American Academy of Pediatrics released new recommendations about juice. Here’s a quick summary: • Avoid juice (completely) in kids under 1 year of age.

• Limit juice intake to 4 ounces for kids under 4, 4 to 6 ounces for kids between 4 and 6, and 8 ounces for kids 7 and up. (For reference, a typical juice box is 6.75 ounces — so have fun taking that away halfway through.)

• Don’t give toddlers juice from a bottle or sippy cup, and don’t give it to them before bed.

There are a few other details, and you can read the recommendations for yourself, but my recommendation is simpler: don’t buy juice. Don’t buy the organic kind, the unfiltered kind, or the watered-down kind.

Just don’t buy it.

Juice significantly increases the risk of tooth decay. Too much juice can result in diarrhea. It can cause unhealthy weight gain and obesity (which leads to type 2 diabetes, heart disease, and a lot of other bad stuff).

And it has very little nutritional value. Some juices contain vitamins A or C, and sometimes added vitamin D and calcium. But if you feed your children a reasonably balanced diet, they should get plenty of these nutrients just by eating food. Honestly, it would be better for them to eat 4 ounces of ice cream and a Flintstone vitamin than to drink 4 ounces of juice.

Public programs like WIC should stop paying for juice.

Parents should stop buying it. And kids should stop drinking it.

If you want fruit, eat it. +

My recommendation is simpler

SUBSCRIBE TO THE ONLINE EDITION! IT’S FREE! Just go to www.issuu.com/medicalexaminer and enter your email address.

Here is a classic that will probably still be great reading a century from now.

It’s already a bit on the vintage side (the copy I’m holding was published in 1991), but the stories are even older.

Roueche started writing for The New Yorker magazine in 1944 and within two years they had created a department in the magazine (The Annals of Medicine) for his regular columns. He continued to write for The New Yorker until his death in 1994. Several of those articles are in this book in case you missed them in the magazine.

The elements which make this book a worthy read are many. For starters, each story reads a bit like a novel.

Characters are introduced, questions are raised, dialogue is uttered between the main characters and various walkons, mystery ensues, the plot thickens, and finally a solution is found, or at least the source of the medical misadventure is discovered even if some things must remain a mystery.

As these stories unfold, taking place from the 1940s through the 1980s, you begin to appreciate the history of

medicine and all the things that have changed in the past half century or so. Some of these stories will have you shaking your head at how antiquainted things were a few scant decades ago; others will leave you pining for the good old days and wondering why some things were ever changed when the “improvements” were not, well, improvements.

But let’s leave healthcare reform to others for the moment and get back to our story.

One of the curious things about looking into the past is often amazement that the savages back in such primitive times (the Fifties, for example) could manage to tie their

shoes, let alone discover fire, penicillin, invent the wheel, airplanes, and later, twerking.

And yet they did. (Related side note: a couple years ago a study set out to determine what the pyramids of Egypt would cost if they were built today. The study concluded that the pyramids could not be built today for any amount of money, mainly due to labor issues and regional strife.)

True, the medical detectives of the 1940s or 50s may not have had the sophisticated gadgetry of today, and epidemiologists may have been sent to the backwoods of Tennessee (as in Chapter 11 of this book) to solve their mysteries, but solve them they did.

If you check into this book you’ll note a legitimate complaint made by previous readers: as a book with some years on it, you can’t help but wonder about today’s state of affairs compared to older statistics cited in the book.

Sometimes you just have to do your own medical detecting.

The Medical Detectives by Berton Roueche, 432 pages, published in March 1991 by Plume +

Research News Fat is the new tobacco A team of researchers from Cleveland Clinic and New York University School of Medicine have found that obesity results in almost 50 percent more years of life lost than tobacco use, which as a killer ran neck-and-neck with high blood pressure.

Part of the reason for obesity’s #1 status may be that numbers of smokers are constantly on the decline, while obese people are constantly on the increase.

Analyzing data from 2014, researchers found the greatest number of lifeyears lost are from obesity, then diabetes, followed by tobacco use, high blood pressure and high cholesterol.

A key takeaway from the findings are that three of the top five (diabetes, hypertension and high cholesterol) are treatable.

The other two are, to a greater or lesser degree,

within the control of individuals themselves.

The late show shows The standard wisdom is that a calorie is a calorie is a calorie.

But new research suggests sometimes a calorie is more than a calorie.

Dietitians (some on the pages of this very newspaper) have maintained that eating late at night is no better or worse than eating at any other time because, well, a calorie is a calorie.

But new research by the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine presented at a medical conference on June 4 suggests otherwise.

Their findings suggest that eating late at night as a regular habit can increase weight, insulin and cholesterol levels, and negatively affect fat metabolism and hormonal markers implicated in heart disease, diabetes and other

health problems.

A new kind of jet lag Have you heard of social jet lag? It is emerging as “an important circadian marker for health outcomes.”

Social jet lag is the term for staying up late and then sleeping late on weekends.

Turns out, social jet lag is associated with bad moods, poorer general health, increased fatigue and sleeplessness.

Even worse, each hour of social jet lag is associated (over time, presumably) with an 11 percent increase in the likelihood of heart disease. This according to preliminary research published June 5 by the American Academy of Sleep Medicine.

If the findings hold up, it would mean sleep regularity is an effective and inexpensive preventive treatment for heart disease and other health problems. +

+ 12

JUNE 9, 2017

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

THE EXAMiNERS +

Can’t believe what I heard today.

Tell me.

by Dan Pearson

My doctor is closing his That’s crazy. practice and surrendering What is he going his medical license. to do now?

He’s going back to college for some reason.

For a postdoctoral degree, obviously.

The Mystery Word for this issue: TERAFRUC

© 2017 Daniel Pearson All rights reserved.

ACROSS 1. Vine partner 6. Noted burn patient 11. Extemporaneous 13. Male singing voice 15. The 48th state 17. Partridge follower 18. CSRA ‘s juvenile jail 20. Word on many doors 21. Acquire 22. DOD agency 23. Former coin of France 24. Dark Angel star 26. Common preposition 27. Fro’s opposite 28. Farm type in Aiken?

29. Type of exercise pants 31. Cut of meat 33. Order from a judge 34. Wall in Jerusalem 35. Grand ___ 36. #5 of 12 38. Opposed to 43. Glum 44. Post or stake (dialect) 45. Hygiene adjective 47. Gordon intro 48. Subject of 2001 Yann Martel book 49. All 50, in short 51. _____ Jim 53. Flow back 54. _____ iron 55. Monetary unit of Romania 57. Meadow 58. School in 15-A (abbrev.)

59. Destination after the ER 60. Columbia County seat 62. Indian money 64. Radioactive gas 65. Active start 66. Type of bin?

1

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15

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QUOTATION PUZZLE

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Click on “READER CONTESTS”

63

50

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by Daniel R. Pearson © 2017 All rights reserved. Built in part with software from www.crauswords.com

DOWN 2. Trout type 3. Axlike tool 4. Beat with a whip 5. Fungal skin infection 6. Model for the soldier atop Augusta’s Confederate Monument 7. Sigmund’s youngest daughter 8. D of DIY 9. Chain with 7 CSRA locations 10. Mag. for M.D.s 12. Obsolete term now called post-traumatic stress 13. Pertaining to bells 14. Missle employed during the Persian Gulf War 16. Depend 19. Parkway’s first name?

25. Suffix for post or wreck 28. Campus org.

30. Aresenic, in short 32. Destination after the ER

— Hippocrates

by Daniel R. Pearson © 2017 All rights reserved

64

65

E W S E H T N U U S R A S L N T T T R F L D F O E A A E R I U O A R E S H C R E A H I I E E S

52

36. Broad Street Center 37. Letters in many front yards 39. Depart 40. Word sometimes preceding 39-D 41. Maj. CSRA employer 42. Capital of Estonia 43. Weeps 44. Trump press secretary 46. Property claim 47. Phobia 50. Part of a flower 52. Magician (singular) 54. Type of dream 56. Piled high hairstyle 61. Bathroom (Brit. informal) 63. Stairs or grade intro?

DIRECTIONS: Recreate a timeless nugget of wisdom by using the letters in each vertical column to fill the boxes above them. Once any letter is used, cross it out in the lower half of the puzzle. Letters may be used only once.

Black squares indicate spaces between words, and words may extend onto a second line.

Solution on page 14.

E

X A M I N E R

1 5

4

3

2

8

5 2

1 5

1

7

6 8

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5 8

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3

by Daniel R. Pearson © 2017 All rights reserved. Built with software from www.crauswords.com

S U D O K U

DIRECTIONS: Every line, vertical and horizontal, and all nine 9-square boxes must each contain the numbers 1 though 9. Solution on page 14.

Use the letters provided at bottom to create words to solve the puzzle above. All the listed letters following #1 are the first letters of the various words; the letters following #2 are the second letters of each word, and so on. Try solving words with letter clues or numbers with minimal choices listed. A sample is shown. Solution on page 14.

P 1 2 3 4 U 1 2 3

1 2 1 2

1 1 2

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 S D — Francis Bacon 1 2 3 1 2 3 4 5 6

1 2 3 4 1

1.AIABBBIGIHS 2.ROOSSTUUA 3.PPTODE 4.DAPE 5.EK 6.FR 7.A 8.S 9.T

SAMPLE:

1. ILB 2. SLO 3. VI 4. NE 5. D =

L 1

O 2

V 3

E 4

I 1

S 2

B 1

L 2

I 3

N 4

D 5

by Daniel R. Pearson © 2017 All rights reserved

BY

All Mystery Word finders will be eligible to win by random drawing.

We’ll announce the winner in our next issue!

9

14

27

30

8

13

16

20

7

Solution p. 14

WORDS NUMBER

Simply unscramble the letters, then begin exploring our ads. When you find the correctly spelled word hidden in one of our ads — enter at AugustaRx.com

VISIT WWW.AUGUSTARX.COM

EXAMINER CROSSWORD

PUZZLE

THE MYSTERY WORD

JUNE 9, 2017

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

13 +

THE BEST MEDICINE ha... ha...

A

businesswoman from Connecticut has a meeting in Alabama. Her meeting done, she stops at a local bar for a drink. The bartender, noting her northern accent, says “Yew shore talk purdy. Wharja go to school at?”

“Yale,” says the businesswoman.

The bartender says, “YEW SHORE TALK PURDY. WHARJA GO TO SCHOOL AT?” “I went to Yale,” the woman said again.

“GO AHEAD! I AIN’T STOPPIN’ YA!”

Moe: Did you get that new job?

Joe: Yeah, they offered me the job on the spot, said they would start me out at $15 an hour, then after 3 months raise me to $20 an hour.

Moe: That’s great! So when do you start?

Joe: In 3 months.

Joe: What about you? How did your job interview go?

Moe: Not too good.

Joe: What happened?

Moe: They said orget everything you learned in college. You won’t need it here. No problem, I said; I never went to college. They said sorry, but you’re underqualified to work here.

Moe: I was thinking that genders are just like the Twin Towers in New York.

Joe: How do you figure that?

Moe: There used to be two of them, and now it’s a pretty sensitive subject.

Teacher: Your next spelling word is “beheaded.”

Student: Can you use it in a sentence?

Teacher: Sure. “Kathy Griffin beheaded to the unemployment office.”

Moe: What do you call children born in a house of ill repute?

Joe: Brothel sprouts, I suppose.

Moe: Tiger’s DUI didn’t surprise me one bit.

Joe: Why not?

Moe: His driving has been getting steadily worse for years.

Moe: How was your appointment with your psychiatrist?

Joe: She told me my narcissism could cause me to misread social situations.

Moe: You think she’s right?

Joe: I think she was just hitting on me.

Moe: Have you tried baby Wookie meat?

Joe: No. Moe: Why not?

Joe: I heard it’s a little chewie.

Moe: Someone broke into my garage and stole 300 cans of Red Bull.

Joe: Man, how can that guy sleep at night? +

Why subscribe to the Medical Examiner?

Because no one should have to make a trip to the doctor or the hospital just to read Augusta’s Most Salubrious Newspaper.

+ +

SUBSCRIBE TO THE MEDICAL EXAMINER By popular demand we’re making at-cost subscriptions available for the convenience of our readers.

If you live beyond the Aiken-Augusta area or miss issues between doctor’s appointments — don’t you hate it when that happens? — we’ll command your mail carrier to bring every issue to your house!

NAME ADDRESS CITY

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Choose ____ six months for $20; or ____ one year for $36. Mail this completed form with payment to Augusta Medical Examiner, PO Box 397, Augusta GA 30903-0397

ON THE ROAD TO BETTER HEALTH A PATIENT’S PERSPECTIVE Editor’s note: Augusta writer Marcia Ribble wrote a long-time column in this paper entitled The Patient’s Perspective reincarnated in this new format. Feel free to contact her at marciaribble@hotmail.com Going out to retrieve the newspaper before sunrise the other day, the street lights were still on and a haze of fog surrounded them, casting murky shadows like one of the opening scenes in the fi rst Harry Potter movie. The feeling was so similar that I half expected a character from the movie to emerge from the shadows and capture the lights from all the poles on my street, snuffing out the lights, so Hagar could safely deliver the infant Harry Potter to his Muggle aunt and uncle. I remembered how the mystery of that moment took time to unfold and create understanding, and the laughter later as the owls brought hundreds of letters from Hogwarts for Harry. I might forget what I had for breakfast yesterday morning, but those memories of having a rich imagination are such a pleasant diversion.

Feeling that playful imagining as throwback to childhood, it set me to giggling and enjoying the déja vu of the moment.

Although I’m beyond 70, it’s still fun to recognize the child parts of myself that all those years of living, no matter how difficult they may have been, have not managed to snuff out. It’s being in touch with the person that I still am, linked to a long chain of memories.

Drinking my coffee I retrieved the memory of sobbing when Heidi was finally able to go back to her beloved Grandpa and her real home in the mountains. I remembered her taking a soft white bread roll to Peter’s grandma who had trouble eating the rougher doughs of the whole grain breads available to the mountain people. That thought connected to today’s world in which we now choose to eat those whole grain breads because they are actually healthier for us. Go figure!

I am obviously not a child now or I wouldn’t have survived and raised five children. But to be a whole person at my age, all of myself needs acceptance and love. And that awareness brings me to a new and delightful return to our child selves—adult coloring books. Those coloring books make possible a lovely expansion of our present selves by reincorporating a childhood experience, while simultaneously upgrading that activity to a much more sophisticated level.

When I fi rst started to hear about them, I was hesitant to give them a try. I still recall my childhood experiences of coloring outside of the lines, feeling I had destroyed the page in the coloring book and setting it and my crayons aside as a worthless endeavor. I worried a little about whether I’d feel similar feelings of frustration and failure. But one day a few weeks ago I was at the store to buy a bunch of Pilot’s G2 gel pens for my puzzle books and I decided that I could afford a small investment in learning something new and old.

The coloring book, colored pencils, colored inks, and paint pens sat on my dining room table for close to three weeks before I sat down to try them out. Guess what? I still color outside the lines sometimes, but it no longer matters. I found out that I love seeing the colors emerge. I enjoy thinking about which colors are appealing when next to one another in the picture.

Interestingly, the experts on healthy aging say that some ways to avoid, or at least delay, dementia involve being willing to engage one’s mind, to learn new things, to remain involved in the world. Applying one’s creative imagination to coloring books is one of those ways. My friend Jerry quilts, and her quilts are a masterpiece of placing colors in juxtaposition. Her mind ought to last well into her centenary years. +

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JUNE 9, 2017

AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

THE MYSTERY SOLVED

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The Mystery Word in our last issue was: BICYCLE

...very cleverly hidden (on the keyboard) in the p. 16 ad for HEAD CAPITAL ADVISORS THE WINNER: JESSICA BROWN Want to find your name here next time? If it is, we’ll send you some cool swag from our goodie bag. The new Mystery Word is on page 12. Start looking!

The Celebrated MYSTERY WORD CONTEST ...wherein we hide (with fiendish cleverness) a simple word. All you have to do is unscramble the word (found on page 12), then find it concealed within one of our ads. Click in to the contest link at www.AugustaRx.com and enter. If we pick you in our random drawing of correct entries, you’ll score our goodie package!

SEVEN SIMPLE RULES: 1. Unscramble and find the designated word hidden within one of the ads in this issue. 2. Visit the Reader Contests page at www.AugustaRx.com. 3. Tell us what you found and where you found it. 4. If you’re right and you’re the one we pick at random, you win. (Winners within the past six months are ineligible.) 5. Prizes awarded to winners may vary from issue to issue. Limited sizes are available of shirt prize. 6. A photo ID may be required to claim some prizes. 7. Other entrants may win a lesser prize at the sole discretion of the publisher.

The new scrambled Mystery Word is found on page 12

SENDING US A CLASSIFIED? USE THE FORM BELOW AND MAIL IT IN, OR GO TO WWW.AUGUSTARX.COM AND PLACE & PAY CONVENIENTLY AND SAFELY ONLINE. THANKS!

Augusta Medical Examiner Classifieds

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AUGUSTA MEDICAL EXAMINER, PO BOX 397, AUGUSTA, GA 30903-0397 Total ad cost by number of words as shown above: $ Multiply by number of times ad to run: x Total submitted: $

The Augusta Medical Examiner publishes on the 1st and 3rd Friday of every month.

Your ad should reach us no later than 7 days prior to our publication date.

That’s how many back issues of the Medical Examiner are available at issuu.com/medicalexaminer You can subscribe to the online edition free!

EXAMINER CLASSIFIEDS HOMES, APARTMENTS, ROOMMATES, LAND, ETC. FOR RENT 1 BR/1BA Condo. Summerville across from AU. Historic, rehabbed, hardwood, stainless kitchen, washer/ dryer with trash, water, pest control included. $900. Excellent location and condition. 706-738-5606. Link for full information: https://coolcondoforrent.wordpress. com/2014/07/04/for-rent/ LAND Land for sale: 14 acres, wooded, beautiful rocky creek flowing through; 45 min from Augusta, walking trails cleared to enjoy while planning future development. Perfect getaway or homesite.

Outstanding schools (K-12) 4 mi. away. $49,000 (706) 831-9015

POND VIEW! Evans all-brick 2-story with solar panels. Avg. electric bill $170 in Northwood, 3,400 sqft. Call 1-800401-0257, ext. 0043 24/7 for price and details.

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PETS Dogs walked, cats sat, in the comfort of your home by retired pharmacist.

No kennel noise, fleas, disease, transport cost/time. Avail 7 days/wk in Martinez/ Evans. $15 per visit. References. Call for free interview at your home. Call Buddy for your buddy: (706) 829-1729 HOUSE CLEANING Your house, apartment, rental move-outs. Thorough, dependable. Weekly, or whatever schedule you prefer. References. 706-877-0421

ROOM FOR RENT with private bathroom and full house privileges. Martinez $600/mo (706) 840-6860

MISCELLANEOUS WANTED: PARTTIME nursing assistant, bathing, dressing, grooming, etc. for quadriplegic man, must live within 15 minutes of North Augusta, $10/hour 803-4395149 Arthur.Shealy@Gmail.com CEMETERY SPACES (2) Sunset Memorial Gardens, Graniteville SC adjacent to lighted military flagstaff, includes granite bench with urn space, installation and inscription.

All $4700 ($8600 value). Spaces only: $2700. Call (803) 295-3033 FISHING CLUB wants more grey-haired members. Meet 2nd Thurs of month at Harbor Inn Restaurant, 12 noon.

“Adventure Before Dementia” Info: (706) 736-8753

Please support our advertisers!

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F. E. GILLIARD, MD FAMILY MEDICINE Acute & Chronic Illnesses Occupational Medicine PROMPT APPOINTMENTS (706) 760-7607

ROOM FOR RENT 1 room, private bathroom, 2bdrm MH on private lot. Clean quiet neighborhood. Non-smoker. $600 monthly. Must be stable, verifiable references and income. Cable and Internet included. Warrenville, 5 min from Aiken, 20 min to Augusta. (803) 270-2658

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FOR RENT 2000+ sqft warehouse space w/ loading dock, Walton Way Medical District. Available immed. $850.00/mo. incl. utilities. 706-564-1644

FOR SALE 3 bedroom/2 bath, single garage Townhouse in Martinez. Master/ bath down, 2 upstairs bedrooms share bath, large loft for office, playroom, den; wood-burning fireplace, covered back porch. Freshly painted with new flooring, lighting and ceiling fans. Easy access to Riverwatch Parkway, Washington Rd, I-20, Augusta. 1987 sq.ft. $147,900.

706-836-7001.

THE PUZZLE SOLVED

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QUOTATION QUOTATION PUZZLE SOLUTION: “Natural forces within us are the true healers of disease.”

— Hippocrates

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WORDS BY NUMBER “Hope is a good breakfast but it is a bad supper.”

— Francis Bacon

JUNE 9, 2017

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

NEVER TEXT & DRIVE

You might not make it back to your Overhead Door.

The Genuine. The Original.

OVERHEAD DOOR COMPANY OF AUGUSTA/AIKEN (706) 736-8478 / (803) 642-7269

Daniel Village Barber Shop 2522 Wrightsboro Road

736-7230

TUE - FRI: 8:00 - 6:00; SATURDAY: 8:00 - 2:00

LISTEN UP!

SUMMERTIME IS HAIRCUT SEASON!

WWW.OHDAUGUSTA.COM

76 Circle K

Highland Ave.

Medical Complex

Ohio Ave.

To advertise in this paper, call 706.860.5455 today!

DANIEL VILLAGE BARBER SHOP

Wrightsboro Road

Daniel Field

Augusta Mall

We’re on Wrightsboro Rd. at Ohio Avenue. +

PROFESSIONAL DIRECTORY ALLERGY

Tesneem K. Chaudhary, MD Allergy & Asthma Center 3685 Wheeler Road, Suite 101 Augusta 30909 706-868-8555

CHIROPRACTIC Evans Chiropractic Health Center Dr. William M. Rice 108 SRP Drive, Suite A 706-860-4001 www.evanschiro.net

COUNSELING Resolution Counseling Professionals 3633 Wheeler Rd, Suite 365 Augusta 30909 706-432-6866 www.visitrcp.com

DENTISTRY

DERMATOLOGY

Georgia Dermatology & Skin Cancer Center 2283 Wrightsboro Rd. (at Johns Road) Augusta 30904 706-733-3373 www.GaDerm.com

DEVELOPMENTAL PEDIATRICS Karen L. Carter, MD 1303 D’Antignac St, Suite 2100 Augusta 30901 706-396-0600 www.augustadevelopmentalspecialists.com

DRUG REHAB Steppingstones to Recovery 2610 Commons Blvd.

Augusta 30909 706-733-1935

FAMILY MEDICINE

F. E. Gilliard MD, Family Medicine 4244 Washington Road Evans, GA 30809 706-760-7607 Industrial Medicine • Prompt appts.

Urgent MD Augusta: 706-922-6300 Grovetown: 706-434-3500 Thomson: 706-595-7825 Primary Care Rates

OPHTHALMOLOGY Roger M. Smith, M.D. 820 St. Sebastian Way Suite 5-A Augusta 30901 706-724-3339

PHARMACY

YOUR LISTING HERE

SENIOR LIVING

Augusta Gardens Senior Living Community 3725 Wheeler Road Augusta 30909 SENIOR LIVING COMMUNITY 706-868-6500 www.augustagardenscommunity.com

SLEEP MEDICINE Sleep Institute of Augusta Bashir Chaudhary, MD 3685 Wheeler Rd, Suite 101 Augusta 30909 706-868-8555

TRANSPORTATION Caring Man in a Van Wheelchair-Stretcher Transports • Serving Augusta Metro 855-342-1566 www.CaringManinaVan.com

VEIN CARE

Medical Center West Pharmacy 465 North Belair Road Evans 30809 Vein Specialists of Augusta Dr. Judson S. Hickey Your Practice 706-854-2424 Periodontist And up to four additional lines of your www.medicalcenterwestpharmacy.com G. Lionel Zumbro, Jr., MD, FACS, RVT, RPVI 501 Blackburn Dr, Martinez 30907 2315-B Central Ave choosing and, if desired, your logo.

Floss ‘em 706-854-8340 Augusta 30904 or lose ‘em! Keep your contact information in Parks Pharmacy www.VeinsAugusta.com 706-739-0071 this convenient place seen by tens of 437 Georgia Ave. thousands of patients every month. N. Augusta 29841 Jason H. Lee, DMD Literally! Call (706) 860-5455 for all 803-279-7450 116 Davis Road the details www.parkspharmacy.com Augusta 30907 Medical Weight & Wellness 706-860-4048 Specialists of Augusta THE AUGUSTA Maycie Elchoufi, MD MEDICAL EXAMINER Steven L. Wilson, DMD 108 SRP Drive, Suite B Psych Consultants Family Dentistry Evans 30809 • 706-829-9906 AUGUSTA’S 2820 Hillcreek Dr 4059 Columbia Road MOST SALUBRIOUS YourWeightLossDoctor.com Augusta 30909 Martinez 30907 NEWSPAPER (706) 410-1202 706-863-9445 www.psych-consultants.com

WEIGHT LOSS

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AUGUSTA MEDiCAL EXAMINER

JUNE 9, 2017