Two Mothers with a Shared Hope by Cheryl Swope & Anita Veyera
From Cheryl As families and teachers can attest, the impact of autism and related conditions can be profound, complex, and lifelong. Effects often appear early, as I describe in Simply Classical: "Michelle wriggled and squirmed constantly. She craved deep contact, but could not sit still long enough to enjoy being held. Her sensory system seemed to malfunction. She leaned into our big dogs, especially her favorite black lab mix, who leaned even harder back into her, slurping her face, giving her the constant sensory input she seemed to crave. Seemingly impervious to pain, Michelle combat-crawled into furniture and walls, banging into them as if on purpose. Nothing most toddlers would deem painful seemed to bother her, but then when we tried to remove a shirt over her head, she cried as if in agony. Language, too, appeared an early area of difficulty…."
Early effects necessitate early action, and looking back on my experiences with my own children and what I've learned from others, I offer these ways to help, strengthen, and support a child with autism (or related conditions) at any age. The unusual nervous system of a child with autism often manifests as "sensory needs" that impact daily life. Something as simple as finger painting can be distressing to a child with autism if not carefully introduced. As parents we can take more time to introduce unusual textures, provide softer clothing, vacuum when he is in another room, and give coaching prior to new foods, experiences, or friends. In a school we can muffle the sound of a classroom bell or buzzer, provide quiet areas in the cafeteria, and speak concisely with a clear, low voice. By respecting sensitivities without unduly indulging them, we can adapt in needed ways to invite the child into a more expansive and wondrous world than he might make for himself. Temple Grandin, the renowned researcher with autism, often attributes her success to her mother's early and diligent teaching of manners. For children with autism, lessons in manners will require practice, role playing, and coaching to generalize to new and varied situations, but they can be taught. In this way we can open to all children the marvelously gratifying realm of being with others who care about us as we care about them. A child with autism may evidence narrow or fixed interests, such as maps or calendars. We can work with these interests to expand knowledge and understanding in other areas. One mother I know employed her child's desire for list-making as a means of learning all of the prepositions and helping verbs in the English language when he studied grammar. A love of trains can translate to writing and drawing exercises or math problems. An older child's interest in weather can be linked to studies in geography, astronomy, or world history. We can respect the child's interests while furthering his education. Most children with autism benefit greatly from a sense of orderliness. With a little planning we can provide a reasonable routine for each day and give clear notice about upcoming changes. We can take extra time to visit the library (an ongoing favorite quiet spot for our family), try to keep the house or classroom tidy, and Cheryl Swope is the author of Simply Classical: A Beautiful Education for Any Child and Memoria Press' Simply Classical Curriculum, as well as editor of the Simply Classical Journal. Anita Veyera is a homeschooling mother of four young children. She is a writer, painter, and singer who loves hot coffee and a good mystery. She and her husband, Jeff, an engineer, reside in rural Colorado.
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Two Mothers with a Shared Hope
SimplyClassical.com
