Metrosource New York Feb/Mar 2020

FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE NY

METROSOURCE

HOW FAR WILL HE GO? THE NOT-SO-GAY CRUSADE OF PETE BUTTIGIEG

OH SNAP!

THE INTERNATIONAL MALE DOCUMENTARY

MGM NATIONAL HARBOR THIS IS THE WAY TO WHOOPIE

THE BEAT GOES ON FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

THE RETURN OF DRUMMER MAGAZINE

TOM GOSS EXPLORING NEW TERRITORIES

IMPORTANT FACTS FOR BIKTARVY®

This is only a brief summary of important information about BIKTARVY and does not replace talking to your healthcare provider about your condition and your treatment.

(bik-TAR-vee)

MOST IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT BIKTARVY

POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF BIKTARVY

BIKTARVY may cause serious side effects, including:

BIKTARVY may cause serious side effects, including: } Those in the “Most Important Information About BIKTARVY” section. } Changes in your immune system. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections.

Tell your healthcare provider if you have any new symptoms after you start taking BIKTARVY. } Kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider should do blood and urine tests to check your kidneys. If you develop new or worse kidney problems, they may tell you to stop taking BIKTARVY. } Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or abnormal heartbeat. } Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, or stomach-area pain. } The most common side effects of BIKTARVY in clinical studies were diarrhea (6%), nausea (6%), and headache (5%).

} Worsening of Hepatitis B (HBV) infection. If you

have both HIV-1 and HBV, your HBV may suddenly get worse if you stop taking BIKTARVY. Do not stop taking BIKTARVY without first talking to your healthcare provider, as they will need to check your health regularly for several months.

ABOUT BIKTARVY BIKTARVY is a complete, 1-pill, once-a-day prescription medicine used to treat HIV-1 in adults. It can either be used in people who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before, or people who are replacing their current HIV-1 medicines and whose healthcare provider determines they meet certain requirements.

BIKTARVY does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS. HIV-1 is the virus that causes AIDS. Do NOT take BIKTARVY if you also take a medicine that contains: } dofetilide } rifampin } any other medicines to treat HIV-1

BEFORE TAKING BIKTARVY Tell your healthcare provider if you: } Have or have had any kidney or liver problems,

These are not all the possible side effects of BIKTARVY. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any new symptoms while taking BIKTARVY.

including hepatitis infection. } Have any other health problems. } Are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if BIKTARVY can harm your unborn baby.

Tell your healthcare provider if you become pregnant while taking BIKTARVY. } Are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed.

Do not breastfeed. HIV-1 can be passed to the baby in breast milk.

You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.FDA.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

Your healthcare provider will need to do tests to monitor your health before and during treatment with BIKTARVY.

HOW TO TAKE BIKTARVY

Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take:

Take BIKTARVY 1 time each day with or without food.

} Keep a list that includes all prescription and over-the-

counter medicines, antacids, laxatives, vitamins, and herbal supplements, and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist.

} BIKTARVY and other medicines may affect each other.

Ask your healthcare provider and pharmacist about medicines that interact with BIKTARVY, and ask if it is safe to take BIKTARVY with all your other medicines.

Get HIV support by downloading a free app at

MyDailyCharge.com

GET MORE INFORMATION } This is only a brief summary of important information

about BIKTARVY. Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist to learn more.

} Go to BIKTARVY.com or call 1-800-GILEAD-5. } If you need help paying for your medicine,

visit BIKTARVY.com for program information.

BIKTARVY, the BIKTARVY Logo, DAILY CHARGE, the DAILY CHARGE Logo, KEEP LOVING, LOVE WHAT’S INSIDE, GILEAD, and the GILEAD Logo are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies.

Version date: December 2018 © 2019 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. BVYC0102 01/19

KEEP LOVING.

Because HIV doesn’t change who you are.

BIKTARVY® is a complete, 1-pill, once-a-day prescription medicine used to treat HIV-1 in certain adults. BIKTARVY does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS.

Ask your healthcare provider if BIKTARVY is right for you.

To learn more, visit BIKTARVY.com.

Please see Important Facts about BIKTARVY, including important warnings, on the previous page and visit BIKTARVY.com.

HELLO

VIEWS

EDITOR’S LETTER

IT’S A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU! This is the first of what I hope will be many letters from me. I am honored to be named the new Editor-in-Chief of METROSOURCE, especially during its 30th Anniversary year. This groundbreaking LGBTQ publication has been at the forefront of events and impactful stories that have helped shape the LGBTQ community. While I am honored to take on the task of stewarding one of the nation’s most important and iconic LGBTQ media brands, I am also very excited to begin this next chapter in LGBTQ history, and to continue to grow the METROSOURCE brand. With plans to expand our digital presence, we are committed more than ever to bringing the National, New York and Los Angeles print editions to our readers with the same great content, look and feel that readers have come to love. The entire METROSOURCE team and its accompanying contributors are some of the most talented individuals in their respective fields, and along with the new faces, there will be some familiar faces to METROSOURCE readers as well.

METROSOURCE’s history began in 1990 as a local New York magazine, when founder Rob Davis had a vision of creating an LGBTQ publication with stories and imagery that readers could be proud to read and display in their homes and share with friends and family; and to create a place where advertisers could let the LGBTQ community know that their patronage is welcome at their places of business. METROSOURCE has been distributed nationally since the mid-1990s, and continues, 30 years later, as one of the largest LGBTQ publications in the United States. We plan to keep that original vision alive and well and continue covering popular culture, travel, health, fitness, entertaining, design, finance and telling the stories of gay and gay-friendly people. So, whether you are in New York, Los Angeles, or points in between, we hope you will enjoy all that METROSOURCE has to offer.

METROSOURCE’s longevity, is due in part to the initial love dedication to the brand, and also because recent studies have shown that print is still the dominant medium to reach the LGBTQ consumer. Our commitment to print, backed with digital, social media, events, and more, provides a wonderful mix with something for every LGBTQ consumer. METROSOURCE connects our readers, our community, our supporters, and our vision for the future.

Supporting one-another in our community is key to a united voice in achieving equality for all. I am personally committed to engaging the community and giving back through charities, non-profits and businesses. Like many of us, I have marched in the streets, gotten married (before and after it was legal to do so), and given time, energy and money to causes that support and embody LGBTQ causes and principles. Let’s be out and proud every day and continue to strive for equality for all.

I invite you to follow METROSOURCE as we celebrate our 30th year. Share this issue with a friend. Send us a tweet. Tag us in your photos. Celebrate life!

■

PUBLISHER Bent Share Entertainment, LLC EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Michael Westman ASSISTANT EDITOR Kevin Phinney CREATIVE DIRECTOR Cesar A Reyes MARKETING DIRECTOR Christopher Jackson GRAPHIC DESIGNER Steven Garcia CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Jennifer Day

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Reproduction of any article, listing or advertisement without the written permission of the publisher is strictly prohibited. The people, businesses and organizations appearing in Metrosource are supportive of the gay community. Mention of any person, business or organization is not a reflection of their sexual orientation. ©2020 Bent Share Entertainment, LLC. Advertisers in Metrosource acknowledge that they do business in the spirit of cooperation, fairness and service, maintaining a high level of integrity and responsibility. Providers of products or services are fully and solely responsible for same as advertised. Metrosource assumes no responsibility or liability for improper or negligent business practices by advertisers. The appearance of any person, model, business or organization in this publication, by name, advertisement or photograph is not an indication of sexual orientation.

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METROSOURCE.COM

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FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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February/March 2020 | VOLUME 31, NO. 1

CONTENTS

36

PRODUCTION PHOTO COURTESY OF TOM GOSS • CIGAR COURTESY OF DRUMMER MAGAZINE • DAVID KNIGHT COURTESY OF ALL MAN MOVIE • POTOMAC PLAZA AT MGM NATIONAL HARBOR COURTESY MGM

46 24 30

24 TOM GOSS HOW THE GAY TROUBADOUR’s World Travels Finally

Brought Him Face to Face.

30 INTERNATIONAL MALE A PAIR OF DOCUMENTARIANS EXPLORE the Sudden

Rise and Fall of the Gay Fashion Bible.

36 DRUMMER MAGAZINE THE RESURRECTION OF THE MAGAZINE that is a

celebration of masculine, gay leather sexuality, free from misogyny, transphobia and racism.

46 TRAVEL MGM NATIONAL HARBOR living high above the fray in a

world designed for entertainment and escape.

ON THE COVER PHOTO BY FRANZ SZONY

20

5

52 CULTURE

5 PETE BUTTIGIEG As the first serious gay contender for a major party’s nomination, Buttigieg finished at the top of the Iowa caucuses, second in New Hampshire and third in Nevada.

14 SCREEN Dancing through life films.

19 FINANCE The cost of separating.

20 BOOKS The art of looking back.

22 MUSIC Androgynous, British electro-pop crooner, husband-and-wife indie duo and country stars dismissing conservatism, music is full of options

BODY

EXCLUSIVELY NY

12 METRO HIV

52 HOME

Prep without prescription.

42 HEALTH Stand up to bullying day.

Giving up the ghost.

Hosting a cocktail party in style.

58 NY SCOPE Fashion and art oh my.

62 HOTSHOPS Venzin gives good grooming.

VIEWS

2 EDITOR’S LETTER

Hello Its a Pleasure to meet you!

64 WEDDINGS Jove Meyer and the hot trends.

68 BAR SOURCE …and drink up.

70 BUSINESS DIRECTORY 13 DIARY Wade grows up seeing sports fandom as a way to fit in – until he realizes he’s part of a group where it leaves him left out.

84 LAST CALL Eureka O’Hara is back

Businesses that cater to the LGBT community.

80 COMMUNITY RESOURCES Organizations and resources for NYC’s LGBTs.

THIS PAGE: PETE BUTTIGIEG BY SHUTTERSTOCK • MURALS OF NEW YORK CITY” IMAGERY COURTESY RIZZOLI/ JOSHUA MCHUGH • PLUM COCKTAIL PORTRAIT PHOTO COURTESY OF TOM DIXON

DEPARTMENTS

February/March 2020 | VOLUME 31, NO. 1

THIS PAGE: PHOTO COURTESY OF PETEFORAMERICA.COM

POLITICS VIEWS

BY KEVIN PHINNEY

AS THE FIRST SERIOUS GAY CONTENDER for a major party’s nomination, Buttigieg finished at the top of the Iowa caucuses, second in New Hampshire and third in Nevada.

He’s been the subject of scorn from the religious right and recently weathered attacks from radio reactionary (and Presidential Medal of Freedom winner) Rush Limbaugh.

Each time, Buttigieg has batted them away and insisted that his orientation has nothing to do with how he’d run the Oval Office.

At the same time, he’s also been attacked on the left — not only by more liberal candidates for his million-dollar donors — but by segments of the LGBTQ community who somehow don’t believe he’s quite “gay enough” to represent them.

Buttigieg is taking each hurdle as it comes. This mayor of South Bend, Indiana is in it to win it, and Mayor Pete isn’t going anywhere any time soon. He’s a Harvard graduate, a Rhodes scholar and a veteran of the war in Afghanistan. At 37, he’s barely old enough to run for the office (the required age is 35), and if elected, he’d be the youngest ever to serve.

He’s also such a warm and affable apple pie kind of guy, you’d suspect Donald Trump eats people like him for brunch. We spoke to him last year in between stops on the campaign trail.

WHAT HE’D PRIORITIZE METROSOURCE: Clearly you don’t want to be identified as a single-issue candidate just because you’re gay. What would you prioritize in the first days of a Buttigieg administration?

Buttigieg: The first priority must be democracy itself. I don’t think we’re going to be able to solve most of our major policy issues if we don’t first improve our political system where those issues come to get heard.

That means everything from redistricting reform and addressing money in politics to making sure our democracy is more democratic by reconsidering the electoral college and looking at statehood for a place like D.C.and making sure people in the territories have equal rights. Every generation up until now has seen America grow more democratic, not less, and I don’t want ours to be the first where the reverse is true — but we’re on track for that if nothing changes.

So, I think democracy is front and center. I’ve talked a lot about ways to enhance freedom as well. The reason I believe in making sure we have universal health care is because I think it makes people freer. I think there are a lot of other economic as well as equality considerations. And third, I think security. I think it’s time for Democrats to get back in the business of talking about security, especially when you have 21st century security challenges like climate security and election security that the other side doesn’t seem to care about at all.

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GAYS AND TRANS AMERICANS IN THE SERVICE METROSOURCE: And when you talked with people in the service, how do they feel about working alongside gay and trans Americans?

Buttigieg: Most people I served with couldn’t care less. They wanted to know if you were prepared to do your job, and if they could trust you to handle a weapon or read an intelligence brief or whatever else was expected of you. The military, if I’m not mistaken, is the largest employer of transgender Americans and these are Americans who just want a chance to do a good job and serve their country like everybody else. I

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do not understand what motivates this president to attack people who are willing to serve — fellow Americans — especially given that he was somebody who got out of his obligation to serve when it was his turn.

I really became interested in public service when I was finishing high school and starting college. I did not realize that it would mean going back to my hometown and serving in local government, but that’s something I came to understand over time. But yeah: If you had asked me when I was younger in college, I would have believed that somebody could either be out or be in elected office, but not both.

THE MAKING OF THE MAYOR METROSOURCE: You lost your father not long ago. How did he help shape your worldview?

Buttigieg: He was a scholar who really cared about how ideas worked in the real world. He studied a lot of social theory, literature — things that I can’t even quite understand. But to the extent that I could keep up with him, it was really being introduced to a world of ideas that had wound up causing many bad and good things to happen. He was an expert in 20th century and what had happened with fascism in Italy and a lot of other movements that really show what’s at stake not only in politics but the world of ideas and the political impact those ideas can have.

METROSOURCE: It seems the cultural fabric of our country is more frayed now than at any time since the Vietnam era. What can you do to unite us?

Buttigieg: Well, I hope that my story can transcend some of those divisions. I’m somebody who is a progressive Democrat, but who lives in a red state. I’m somebody who believes in a lot of maybe more traditionally conservative values like faith and family and freedom but believes that those values are best served by progressive policies. And I’m looking forward to do being able to do what — hopefully — what I was able to do here at home, which is to draw a lot of support from Independents

PHOTOS 6-7 BY SHUTTERSTOCK

POLITICS VIEWS

METROSOURCE: One difference between you and Donald Trump is that you did serve in the military. How did that experience help you prepare to become Commander-in-Chief?

Buttigieg: First, it gives me a very intimate understanding of what’s at stake when a president orders young men and women to go to war, having been among those young men and women. I think it also gave me a sense of just how complex and important our structure of alliances has been. We were in a true coalition environment. And the destruction of American alliances in the last few years really does put American lives at risk, and the next president will have a lot of work to do to repair and enhance America’s role as a leader in the world. I believe that you can either resent the rest of the world, or you can lead it; but you can’t do both. And we need to make the right choice in order to be a safer country for the next generation. Third and maybe most importantly, it was just an experience that brought me together with a lot of other Americans — people from very different backgrounds; very different political views and we learned to trust each other with our lives. And I think we need more of that nationally, but it shouldn’t require going to war. It’s one of those reasons I think national service is something we really need to find a way to expand in our country.

and Republicans. Not so much by pretending to be more conservative than I really am, but by focusing on reality, on results on lived experience and on the values that we do share.

WHOSE INDIANA IS IT, ANYWAY? METROSOURCE: While you’re looking to find common ground between us, another Indiana politician named Mike Pence is doing his best to practice the politics of division.

Buttigieg: Look, I think what really matters is whether our leadership pulls Americans apart or brings them together. In an odd way, Mike Pence helped unify Indiana around LGBT issues in the sense that Republicans and Democrats, mayors from both parties, business leaders — even organizations like NASCAR and the NCAA — all stood up to him on the so-called ‘religious freedom’ bill and said, ‘that’s not who we are.’ So, while it was divisive in one sense, it brought out the best in many of us. We responded and stood up to say that we believe our state is better when its inclusive and when everybody’s made to feel welcome.

won’t last forever if the American people don’t send a message that we want leaders who lead us in the right direction and represent us better. You know, one of the things that kept me safe when I was overseas was not only my armor and my weaponry, but just the fact that more people than not looked up to America. If we lose that, then that does put our security at risk.

METROSOURCE: Some say America is now a laughingstock around the world, since Donald Trump has alienated one ally after another and cozied up to dictators.

Buttigieg: I think that in an increasingly networked world, both good and bad ideas become more contagious. And the real dynamic that’s driving a lot of this is a false promise that’s being offered and that’s attractive to some, which is a promise to turn back the clock. In Europe, that often mean ethnically; in the U.S., it often means economically.

But the bottom line is, there’s no turning back the clock. And I don’t think you can ever have an honest politics that revolves around the word ‘again.’

WORLD TURNING METROSOURCE: As I’m sure you know, fascism and nationalism are gaining in popularity elsewhere. It’s as though technology moves briskly along, and human nature remains stubbornly the same. A lot of the world looks politically and socially very similar to the 1930s.

Buttigieg: Well, I’ve spent a lot of time in different parts of the world, including Europe and the Arab world. And what I’ve seen is that people, even if they’re very skeptical of American governments and American leaders, still think warmly of American people. That is being put to the test and it

METROSOURCE: You’ve been abroad and served overseas. What do you think are the key elements to restoring the country’s reputation with our allies, competitors and adversaries?

Buttigieg: It’s particularly important for us to establish, both through moral consistency and through concrete measures like U.S. aid, that we are prepared to carry a leadership role in the future.

Especially at a time when — whether you’re looking at a place like Saudi Arabia that’s considered an American ally — or a place like Russia, or a competitor like China, or you see what’s going on in some parts of Europe. It seems like commitments to freedom and democracy are in the retreat.

METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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POLITICS METROSOURCE: Donald Trump has no trouble or shame when it comes to objectifying people and reducing them to perceived flaws. How do you plan to cope with the insults that are bound to come your way in a presidential contest?

Buttigieg: Well, I’ve had a fair amount of batting practice over the course of my life when it comes to dealing with bullies. And I’m not that worried about it. I think the more the conversation is about him, the less it’s about us; the less it’s about people going through everyday life in places like South Bend and across America. One of the unfortunate attributes of this presidency is that it’s a bit like a computer virus. It ties up all our processing power and makes it hard for us to think or do anything else. But at the end of the day, it’s not about him. I think he’s a symptom more than a cause of a political and economic system that’s let a lot of Americans down, and really does need to be changed in a number of deep ways in order to serve us well for the years ahead.

I think we live in a moment when the disruption that people are experiencing in the economy goes beyond income. It’s income, but it’s a lot more than that. If you lose your position in the industrial economy that’s been steady for most of your life, and you’re told by some wellmeaning policy maker like me that you just need to get some retraining and we’ll make you a whole new person, that may or may not be consistent with how you view yourself.

A job is more than a paycheck. It’s how we understand how we fit into the world. In an era where our relationship to the economy is changing — especially because of automation and technology, let alone things like globalization — that’s going to continue and it’s going to accelerate.

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And so if you lose that sense of community and identity and purpose that used to come from a lifelong relationship with a single employer, which is something that’s happening to a lot of people in my part of the industrial Midwest, something has to take that place. And there can be some very healthy responses to that, by allowing things like community and family and faith to play a greater role in how you define yourself relative to a lifelong career at a single employer.

If we don’t build up those things, then you’re going to get the alternative. And there have been some very ugly alternatives that have been offered and one of them has been, frankly, white identity politics, and it brings us to a pretty problematic place as a country.

LOOK AT THE RESUMÉ METROSOURCE: So, if this were a closing statement at a presidential debate, what would you say in conclusion about why you should be elected the next President of the United States?

Buttigieg: Well, look: there’s something very audacious, almost obscene, about any human being thinking they could handle the responsibilities of that office. And yet everybody who’s had that office has been a mortal human being with whatever abilities and experience they brought to the table. I think the experience of a mayor is extremely relevant; I would argue perhaps more relevant than being a member of the legislative body in Washington right now. Because a mayor is on the front lines of government. You’re an executive with day to day responsibility and could be handling anything at any given moment, from an economic development deal in an industrial park to a decision on activating the

PHOTOS 8-9 BY SHUTTERSTOCK

VIEWS

DONALD FIGHTS DIRTY

Emergency Operations Center to deal with a weather emergency. Every minute of the job, you are on the line in some way. It reflects both the day to day aspects of executive leadership and the more symbolic ones, which have to do with holding a community or group of people together and summoning their highest values. I think a mayor of a city of any size has had to do that many times, and I think that’s an experience that’s especially relevant today to the demands of the presidency.

METROSOURCE: So, let’s ask the question that could pass through the minds of many straight Americans as your campaign reaches out: How is Pete Buttigieg being gay going to impact his being president?

Buttigieg: Well, my marriage happens to be same sex. That’s also probably the most normal thing about my life. It holds me down to Earth and it widens my perspective and it’s something I have in common with people who are married who are not gay. I’ll also say that as someone whose marriage exists by the grace of a single vote on the Supreme Court, I have a deep understanding of how political choices affect everyday life. And that’s an understanding I carry with me not only when thinking about LGBTQ issues, but just more generally when thinking about what’s at stake in American politics and policy.

I tell this story at length in my book, which is out today called Shortest Way Home, so if anybody wants to get a deeper sense of what that was like, that would be the place to look. But to make a long story short, we met on a dating app called Hinge. And I’m glad that I clicked the right button because as soon as I met him, I knew that I’d met somebody special. Our first date was a pint at an Irish pub followed by a baseball game in South Bend. It didn’t take long to realize that something special had happened.

THIS IS NOT A DRILL METROSOURCE: Doubtless there are some who will say that your run, should you decide to make it, will be really a symbolic quest to shatter a glass ceiling for LGBTQ people. But the way you’re talking, you have some expectation you could win.

Buttigieg: Yeah… I just don’t see how you can do something like this — something that dominates your life in the way that running for an office like this does — that puts you out there and requires so much from you and a whole team of people and countless supporters. I don’t think you can do that unless you can see a path and you’re prepared to win and hold the office you’re running for.

I understand that this is an underdog project, but I think it’s a good season for underdog projects and for newcomers. And based on the early response we’ve gotten just on the exploratory committee; we think there’s a lot of other people who view it the same way we do. I’d say all the signs are pointing in the same direction, and we’re really All Systems Go now.

PeteforAmerica.com is our website and we’re very eager for people to add their names so that we can ask people to volunteer when we need it. And, in fundraising. We don’t have the sort of gilded fundraising base that a senator from one of America’s biggest cities might have. We’re really counting on grassroots support from people who, for whatever number of reasons, believe it makes sense for us to be part of this conversation. And it wouldn’t hurt if somebody who wants to be supportive got a copy of the book too.

You’re going to hear us talking a lot about freedom and demonstrating that freedom to live a life of your choosing — there’s a lot more to that than freedom from — freedom from regulation, freedom from taxes, freedom from government. It also has to do with building up people’s freedom to live a good life. And that means freedom to start a business even if it means changing jobs because you’re not afraid of losing your health care.

It means freedom to marry the person you love. It means freedom to be who you are. It means freedom to organize for better working conditions. And I think it’s high time that people on my side of the aisle got comfortable once again talking about freedom.

■ METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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Important Facts About DOVATO

This is only a brief summary of important information about DOVATO and does not replace talking to your healthcare provider about your condition and treatment.

What is the Most Important Information I Should Know about DOVATO? If you have both human immunodeficiency virus-1 (HIV-1) and hepatitis B virus (HBV) infection, DOVATO can cause serious side effects, including: • Resistant HBV infection. Your healthcare provider will test you for HBV infection before you start treatment with DOVATO. If you have HIV-1 and hepatitis B, the hepatitis B virus can change (mutate) during your treatment with DOVATO and become harder to treat (resistant). It is not known if DOVATO is safe and effective in people who have HIV-1 and HBV infection.

• Worsening of HBV infection. If you have HIV-1 and HBV infection, your HBV may get worse (flare-up) if you stop taking DOVATO. A “flare-up” is when your HBV infection suddenly returns in a worse way than before. Worsening liver disease can be serious and may lead to death. ° Do not run out of DOVATO. Refill your prescription or talk to your healthcare provider before your DOVATO is all gone. ° Do not stop DOVATO without first talking to your healthcare provider. If you stop taking DOVATO, your healthcare provider will need to check your health often and do blood tests regularly for several months to check your liver.

What is DOVATO? DOVATO is a prescription medicine that is used without other antiretroviral medicines to treat HIV-1 infection in adults who have not received antiretroviral medicines in the past, and without known resistance to the medicines dolutegravir or lamivudine. HIV-1 is the virus that causes Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS). It is not known if DOVATO is safe and effective in children.

Who should not take DOVATO? Do Not Take DOVATO if You: • have ever had an allergic reaction to a medicine that contains dolutegravir or lamivudine.

• take dofetilide.

What should I tell my healthcare provider before using DOVATO? Tell your healthcare provider about all of your medical conditions, including if you: • have or have had liver problems, including hepatitis B or C infection.

• have kidney problems.

• are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. One of the medicines in DOVATO (dolutegravir) may harm your unborn baby. ° Your healthcare provider may prescribe a different medicine than DOVATO if you are planning to become pregnant or if pregnancy is confirmed in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy. ° If you can become pregnant, your healthcare provider will perform a pregnancy test before you start treatment with DOVATO. ° If you can become pregnant, you should consistently use effective birth control (contraception) during treatment with DOVATO. ° Tell your healthcare provider right away if you are planning to become pregnant, you become pregnant, or think you may be pregnant during treatment with DOVATO. ©2019 ViiV Healthcare or licensor.

DLLADVT190031 November 2019 Produced in USA.

Learn more about Kalvin and DOVATO at DOVATO.com

Tell your healthcare provider about all of your medical conditions, including if you: (cont’d) • are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed if you take DOVATO. ° You should not breastfeed if you have HIV-1 because of the risk of passing HIV-1 to your baby. ° One of the medicines in DOVATO (lamivudine) passes into your breastmilk. ° Talk with your healthcare provider about the best way to feed your baby.

Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take, including prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements.

Some medicines interact with DOVATO. Keep a list of your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine.

• You can ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for a list of medicines that interact with DOVATO. • Do not start taking a new medicine without telling your healthcare provider. Your healthcare provider can tell you if it is safe to take DOVATO with other medicines.

What are Possible Side Effects of DOVATO? DOVATO can cause serious side effects, including: • Those in the “What is the Most Important Information I Should Know about DOVATO?” section.

• Allergic reactions. Call your healthcare provider right away if you develop a rash with DOVATO. Stop taking DOVATO and get medical help right away if you develop a rash with any of the following signs or symptoms: fever; generally ill feeling; tiredness; muscle or joint aches; blisters or sores in mouth; blisters or peeling of the skin; redness or swelling of the eyes; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue; problems breathing.

• Liver problems. People with a history of hepatitis B or C virus may have an increased risk of developing new or worsening changes in certain liver tests during treatment with DOVATO. Liver problems, including liver failure, have also happened in people without a history of liver disease or other risk factors.

Your healthcare provider may do blood tests to check your liver.

Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the following signs or symptoms of liver problems: your skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow (jaundice); dark or “tea-colored” urine; light-colored stools (bowel movements); nausea or vomiting; loss of appetite; and/or pain, aching, or tenderness on the right side of your stomach area.

• Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis). Lactic acidosis is a serious medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the following symptoms that could be signs of lactic acidosis: feel very weak or tired; unusual (not normal) muscle pain; trouble breathing; stomach pain with nausea and vomiting; feel cold, especially in your arms and legs; feel dizzy or lightheaded; and/or a fast or irregular heartbeat.

• Lactic acidosis can also lead to severe liver problems, which can lead to death. Your liver may become large (hepatomegaly) and you may develop fat in your liver (steatosis). Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the signs or symptoms of liver problems which are listed above under “Liver problems.” You may be more likely to get lactic acidosis or severe liver problems if you are female or very overweight (obese).

SO MUCH GOES INTO WHO I AM HIV MEDICINE IS ONE PART OF IT. Reasons to ask your doctor about DOVATO: DOVATO can help you reach and then stay undetectable* with just 2 medicines in 1 pill.

That means fewer medicines† in your body while taking DOVATO

You can take it any time of day with or without food (around the same time each day)—giving you flexibility

DOVATO is a once-a-day complete treatment for adults who are new to HIV-1 medicine.

Results may vary. *Undetectable means reducing the HIV in your blood to very low levels (less than 50 copies per mL). † As compared with 3-drug regimens.

KALVIN‡ Living with HIV

What are Possible Side Effects of DOVATO (cont’d)?

• Changes in your immune system (Immune Reconstitution Syndrome) can happen when you start taking HIV-1 medicines. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections that have been hidden in your body for a long time. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you start having new symptoms after you start taking DOVATO. • The most common side effects of DOVATO include: headache; diarrhea; nausea; trouble sleeping; and tiredness.

These are not all the possible side effects of DOVATO. Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.fda.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

Where Can I Find More Information?

• Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist.

• Go to DOVATO.com or call 1-877-844-8872, where you can also get FDA-approved labeling.

October 2019 DVT:2PI-2PIL Trademark is owned by or licensed to the ViiV Healthcare group of companies.

Compensated by ViiV Healthcare

‡

Could DOVATO be right for you? Ask your doctor today.

PREP WITHOUT PRESCRIPTION

12

STATE SENATOR SCOTT WIENER OF SAN FRANCISCO

came out of the“PrEP Closet”five years ago, publishing a column disclosing his daily Truvada regimen in hopes it would raise awareness about the then-relatively new drug.

“It makes no sense to me that we haven’t done everything in our power to make sure everyone knows about these medications and can easily access them,” Wiener told Metrosource recently.“PrEP access has been a passion for me for years, and I have an obligation to do everything in my power to end new HIV infections.”

This year, Wiener has been ramping up his efforts to improve access to PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) via a legislative measure that, if enacted, would allow anyone in California to access PrEP without a physician prescription. Wiener and San Diego Assemblymember Todd Gloria’s legislation to dismantle barriers to access such preventative medications has overcome some, but all hurdles, passing the State Senate and two Assembly Committees to date (and at press time was awaiting a vote by the Assembly Committee on Appropriations).

The bill authorizes pharmacists to furnish PrEP and PEP (postexposure prophylaxis) to patients similar to how they can already distribute emergency contraceptives and the birth control pills without prescriptions, and bars insurance companies from requiring patients to obtain prior authorization before using insurance benefits to obtain either medication.

“We know we can end the HIV epidemic thanks to these drugs like PrEP and PEP,”said Josh Stickney, Communications Manager at Equality California, a co-sponsor of the measure.“Right now, the issue is access.

Access for millions of Californians who should be on this drug who are at risk of exposure, and we are proud to partner with these openly gay champions in our legislature.”

Legislators stress that the measure would broaden the number of places where people can access PrEP and PEP, particularly in communities that lack access to primary care physicians, and motivate people FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

METROSOURCE.COM

who aren’t comfortable seeing a physician. Wiener notes that it also will benefit those who may have been exposed to HIV, allowing them to quickly access PEP at a pharmacy, instead of having to visit a physician or emergency room. To be effective, a person must start PEP within 72 hours.

“I’ve seen too many people get sick and die and have seen the impact of the disease on my community,” Wiener says. “The fact that a single pill a day can almost entirely eliminate the risk of HIV and the fact that a 28-day course can stop HIV from taking hold in someone’s body, that is just incredible.”

The California measure is the first of its kind in that nation. New York adopted a pilot program allowing pharmacists to dispense a 7-day supply of PEP (though, not PrEP). But the proposed legislation goes further, allowing pharmacists to provide the full 28-day course of PEP without a prescription and the first 60 days of Scott Wiener PrEP without a prescription.

Initially, physician organizations—particularly the California Medical Association—contested the measure, but Wiener praised the organization for recently withdrawing its opposition.

Supporters stress that the more people who can access PrEP and PEP, the fewer new infections. Data suggests that only about 9,000 people in California were taking PrEP in 2016, even though between 220,000 and 240,000 residents could have been, according to the California Department of Public Health’s Office of AIDS. Additionally, a recent report found that while new HIV infections have decreased, the state is still experiencing a significant disparity between black and Latino gay men and their white counterparts. Latino men were nearly twice as likely to contract HIV as white men, and black men were more than three times as likely.

“California is leading the way on a lot of things when it comes to LGBTQ equality,” Stickney says. “If California can continue to lead the way in getting to zero new HIV transmissions and deaths, and zero stigma, we are hopeful the rest of the country will follow suit.”

■

THIS PAGE: SAN FRANCISCO STATE SENATOR SCOTT WIENER, COURTESY PHOTO • TRUVADA IMAGE, COURTESY OF GILEAD

BODY

METROHIV

BY JEFF SIMMONS

STOCK PHOTO COPYRIGHT: PHOTO BY RAWPIXEL

I’VE BEEN AN AVID SPORTS FAN since I was a little boy growing up in

the Ozarks. My father tried his darndest to make me a good athlete.

He played catch and tossed a football. I never fit the mold. My body was soft as a Twinkie, and I had reflexes like a Slinky. My preferences leaved toward reading books and eyeing sweaty, shirtless boys. My father’s dream of having the next Larry Bird ended quickly.

So instead, my father focused on teaching me to be a fan of the games. When it came to baseball, he noted the beauty of a knuckleball the importance of sacrificing to move a runner up a base. He taught me the way a zone defense works in basketball. And I learned how running a football can open up the passing game.

I grew into an incredible sports fan. It helped me bond - with my father, then with college fraternity brothers and work colleagues.

As a gay man who grew up in the 1970s, came of age in the 1980s and started my adult career in the 1990s, sports made me feel like I belonged in worlds when I too often felt like an outsider. It felt nice to be a part of something bigger than me.

When I met Gary, he called me a “reverse stereotype” because of my love for and knowledge of sports. He was stunned that I followed the St. Louis Cardinals, St. Louis Blues, St. Louis (now LA) Rams, Missouri Tigers and Northwestern Wildcats. I followed them just as avidly as The Real Housewives.

The first time I met Gary’s father, a St. Louis Cardinals game was playing on his TV. Gary’s father face turned to shock when I sat down to watch the game with him. He was stunned when I knew as much about the game and team as he did.

That’s largely because Gary knows nothing about sports. “What inning is it?” he asks when I’m watching football. “Why don’t they wear short-shorts like they did when I was growing up?” he asks when I watch basketball. Usually, when I watch a game, Gary watches Lifetime in another room.

“I have to keep it a little gay in this house,” Gary will explain.

Soon, he’ll do so by screaming when a character played by one of the Duff sisters is kidnapped. I used to take Gary to football games in St. Louis. And he spent the entire game mimicking the cheerleaders.

Meanwhile, his only goal at a Cardinals game has been to see how much junk food he could ingest.

Last year, the Rams’ journey to the Super Bowl was a dream come true for me. I had watched the Rams go to the Super Bowl twice in St. Louis. Now that I wintered in Palm Springs and ventured to LA frequently, I felt like the Rams were again my team. “Why don’t we host a Super Bowl party to celebrate?” Gary asked.

“Remember the last Super Bowl party you threw?” I replied.

Gary ducked his head as if I were tossing a football at him. The guest list had been the two of us. The theme was “Cheer 2000!”This consisted of Gary standing in front of the TV in a cheerleading skirt holding pom-poms and yelling things like: “We’ve got spirit! Yes, we do! We’ve got spirit, how ‘bout you? ”And who could forget the timeless classic,“How funky is your chicken, how loose is your goose?”

I spent the entire game yelling,“For the love of God, move!”

“It couldn’t be worse than last time,” Gary finally persuaded me.

But it was. We invited two dozen gay men. They arrived looking as if they were going to a New Year’s Eve party in the Hamptons. They stood in front of the TV drinking, laughing and gossiping. And they stopped to watch the TV only when the commercials came on.

The Rams played like hell and lost to the Patriots. I was irritated at Gary for making me throw the party and beyond depressed.

But then my friends made me do a shot and started a game of “Would You Rather?”that always ended with Tom Brady as the answer.

It culminated with a cheer-off that Gary won.

In the end, I won, too. Despite annoying the hell out of me, my friends lifted my spirits. They also reminded me I was no longer an outsider. I was part of a community even bigger and better than sports. And this team would always be my biggest cheerleaders.

■ METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

VIEWS

Wade grows up seeing sports fandom as a way to fit in – until he realizes he’s part of a group where it leaves him left out. BY WADE ROUSE

DIARY

MY BIGGEST CHEERLEADERS

13

SCREEN CULTURE

DANCING THROUGH LIFE

BY JONATHAN ROCHE

AND THEN WE DANCED Southern state). In recent years, the nation has been featured several times in American news for its religious and cultural intolerance of homosexuality. So viewers may worry from the get-go for its main character, young Merab. Yes, he has a girlfriend, who is also his dance partner. They’ve been in rigorous training for the Georgian National Ensemble since the age of 10. And, yes he can hang with the herd of other male dancers. But one look at him, and it’s clear that he is different. When a handsome newcomer, Irakli, appears in the dance studio Merab finds in him both a fierce rival and an object of desire. As their relationship blossoms, so does Merab. But even as Merab comes to vibrant new life, he must also struggle to support his poor family (including his reckless, party-boy brother). All the while, he keeps dancing his heart out to win a position in the professional ensemble, which seems like the only way path to better circumstances. This quality production makes an - at first - very foreign place seem familiar through the detail and realness of it characters. It’s definitely on my shortlist of the finest gay films of 2019. Perhaps best of all, it is filled with dance. This includes both Georgian traditional dance (which is pretty impressive to watch) and Merab dancing to the beat of his own drum - which means sometime wearing a Sia-esque wig while gyrating to Robyn’s“Honey.” THE WORD: As story as uplifting as its many leaps into the air. COMING TO: Theaters

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METROSOURCE.COM

THIS PAGE: AND THEN WE DANCED PHOTO COURTESY MUSIC BOX FILMS

SWEDEN’S ENTRY FOR THE ACADEMY AWARDS IS A STORY ENTIRELY SET IN GEORGIA (the Asian country, not the

oozes with details that emotionally charge quiet scenes which would otherwise seem mundane. Jane tries to keep her head down as she slaves away. But she suffers indignities and degradations with dispiriting regularity.

People - from janitors to passing celebrities like Patrick Wilson - at the office treats her like she’s not even there. Two male assistants that sit across from her look at her with a fascinating mix of pity and revulsion. Meanwhile, her boss in the next room never shows his face at all - remaining only a belligerent voice on the phone. Jane is prepared to pay her dues, but as the unscrupulous practices of her employer reach new lows, she seeks help from Human Resources (Matthew Macfadyen -Succession), only to discover new depths of help-

THIS PAGE: THE ASSISTANT PHOTO COURTESY TY JOHNSON / BLEECKER STREET • THE TRAITOR PHOTO COURTESY SONY PICTURES CLASSICS

lessness. Director Kitty Green displays a mas-

THE ASSISTANT

tery of showing-not-telling. She crafts a story

WHO WOULD HAVE SUSPECTED ONE DAY IN THE LIFE OF A PERSONAL AS-

Julia Garner carries it off with an exceptionally

SISTANT could be so compelling or so maddening. Fresh out of college Jane (Julia

naturalistic performance. THE WORD: The

Garner - Ozark) is working a great job opportunity as an assistant to a powerful,

Assistant is reminiscent of 1994’s indie classic

Weinstein-esque, entertainment mogul at his offices in downtown New York. On

Swimming With Sharks – if you replaced the

the surface her job seems pretty mind-numbing. It’s mostly tasks like making

ultimate over-the-top horrible boss (Kevin

coffee, supplying the copy machine, taking phone messages, etc. Yet witnessing

Spacey) with something even more brutal.

this is never boring in The Assistant. This remarkably focused and nuanced film

COMING TO: Theaters

that rings true to real life in every scene. And

THE TRAITOR

him back to home. Then Buscetta does something unthinkable in his world: he

WHEN IT COMES TO MAKING A MOVIE ABOUT THE ITALIAN MAFIA, it’s dif-

starts ratting on the other bosses. Working with Judge Giovanni Falcone, Buscetta

ficult to break the mold. Legendary films like The Godfather, Goodfellas and Don-

testifies in court that the mafia is no mere bunch of gangs but rather a single entity.

nie Brasco make rough competition. For the most part they work the same angle,

(At the time, this was not widely accepted by authorities.) At this point, the film

showing both the romantic and soul-destroying aspects of organized crime. So does

seems to morph into a court-room drama, but a surprisingly colorful one. From

The Traitor. Like those films, it’s about real gangsters. But unlike them, it’s actually

there the film follows Buscetta into hiding in the U.S. and through the rest of his

an Italian film (and also Italy’s Best Foreign Film Academy Award contender). In it,

life, complete with all the usual witness-protection paranoia. The story’s accuracy

Tommaso Buscetta - a boss-level member of the mafia - has tried to get out. But,

makes it compelling, but what really holds the film together is Favino’s performance

in true Cosa Nostra form, they pulled him back in. Seeking to escape the violence

as Buscetta, who the audience quickly comes to respect, and then genuinely like.

raging over the booming heroin trade in the early 1980s, Buscetta moves to Brazil.

There’s also a massive explosion at one point so realistic and shocking that it might

However, his former ‘friends’ and associates go after the relatives he left behind in

literally take your breath away. THE WORD: Solid film-making by director Marco

Italy. And Brazilian authorities discover his true identity, arrest him, and extradite

Bellocchio, and an educational must for fans of mafia films. COMING TO: Theaters METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

15

SCREEN CULTURE

OLYMPIC DREAMS

awkward Ezra whom she meets at the dining hall. Between scenes of them wan-

A FILM ABOUT TWO LONELY HEARTS WHO MEET AT THE 2018 WINTER

dering around together backstage of a real Olympics are scenes of both characters

OLYMPICS in PyeongChang South Korea, and the first film ever shot inside the

separately interacting with real athletes from the games. Ezra affably breaks through

olympic village. The novelty of this setting elevates what is otherwise basically just

several language barriers to chat up the folks in his dental chair, while Penelope

a sweet and highly improvised Lost in Translation-esque tale, but the appeal of the

meets a freestyle skier named Gus, played by openly gay athlete and YouTuber, Gus

film’s two leads helps a lot as well. Nick Kroll (Sausage Party, Big Mouth, Sing)

Kenworthy (American Horror Story: 1984). One of the best things about the olym-

plays Ezra, a dentist who, while on a break from his fiancé, volunteers to provide

pic village is that everyone is pretty darn fit, and with everyone being so young,

dental services to the olympians. Meanwhile Alexi Pappas, who is both a film-

strong, and attractive rumor has that it becomes a fairly frisky place. After Penelope

maker (Tracktown) and a Greek-American long distance athlete who competed

finishes barking up the wrong tree with Gus they become friends, freeing her up to

in the 2016 summer olympics, plays Penelope, a young cross-country skier who’s

connect with the older and more cautious Ezra. The end is predictable but heartfelt,

come to compete for the United States. After Penelope’s event is over early in the

and though not a professional actress Pappas fits the film well. THE WORD: Indie

games she’s left to disappointedly sulk alone, but for the gregarious and yet equally

film meet Olympic grandeur. COMING TO: Theaters

LITTLE WOMEN FOLLOWING UP HER BIG SPLASH ONTO THE DIRECTING SCENE, 2017’S LADY BIRD, Greta Gerwig (Frances Ha) tackles and manages to refresh a beloved classic in both pacing and language somehow without sacrificing any of the story’s content or meaning. The novel by author Louisa May Alcott is in this with an equally star-studded cast. A strong ensemble is headed by Saoirse Ronan (Lady Bird) as Jo March the most spirited and literary of her family. However the story’s strength lies largely in the variety of lives the four March sisters make for themselves in 1860’s New England. Together with Jo the other sisters, Meg (Emma Watson - Harry Potter, Beauty and the Beast), Beth (Eliza Scanlen - Sharp Objects), and Amy (Florence Pugh - Midsommar) live with their mother Marmee (Laura Dern, who also shines in Gerwig’s partner’s film - Noah Baumbach’s Marriage Story). Across the road handsome young Laurie (Timothée Chalamet - Call Me By Your Name) lives with his lonely grandfather (Chris Cooper), and elsewhere in town resides rich old Aunt March, played by a little known actress named Meryl Streep. Tracy Letts (August: Osage County, Ford v. Ferrari) also deserves a mention for playing Jo’s publisher - Letts who elevates most everything he’s in plays an important role in the film’s structure as Gerwig wisely chooses to begin the story near it’s middle, and then crisply work her way back there from both ends. She updates a lot of the dialogue while deftly avoiding anachronism or loss of the story’s historical feel. Most of all she fills the tale with the joyful spirit that Alcott originally intended. THE WORD: Saoirse Ronan might win an Oscar for this, but Florence Pugh frequently steals the show. COMING TO: Video on Demand

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FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

METROSOURCE.COM

THIS PAGE: OLYMPIC DREAMS PHOTO COURTESY IFC FILMS • LITTLE WOMEN PHOTO BY WILSON WEBB / COLUMBIA PICTURES

era perhaps better known for the 1994 film adaption which in my opinion Gerwig utterly exceeds, and

IN FABRIC IMAGINE YOU’RE A LONELY MIDDLE-AGED BRITISH LADY WITH A BORING JOB AT A BANK. You’re recently separated from your husband, and your

THIS PAGE: TBOMBSHELL PHOTOS BY BY HILARY BRONWYN GALE SMPSP / LIONSGATE • IN FABRIC PHOTOS COURTESY A24

son is already an adult, who’s dating a very tall and very weird older lady (Gwendoline Christie - Brienne from Game of Thrones) - so you really need get out of the house, and to get back in the dating game, but first you need to spice up your look. So you check out this department store where all the sales-women look a bit like witches dressed in victorian funereal garb, sporting foreign accents and talking to you in overly sophisticated english that is simultaneous confusing and yet also makes perfect sense. One of them sells you on an artery-red dress that makes you look pretty darn tasty,… and then your dark adventure begins. The dress looks good but it also causes a strange rash on your chest, and when put in the washing machine, it kinda destroys the machine. Then when the repair man comes and explains in detail what needs to be fixed, you start to slip into a stupor because of how mindnumbingly boring he is. Does this make any sense, have I lost you?

Even if I have, In Fabric will not because it is truly marvelous-strange.

Don’t expect the plot to add up to any kind of tidy sum, but do expect a lurid film that positively drips with style, intrigue, and the feeling that it comes about 50-years in the past. Acclaimed horror director Peter Strickland (the sumptuous sadomasochistic romance, The Duke of Burgundy) has definitely made one of the most unique and possibly one of the best films of 2019, and the protagonist is played beautifully by the wonderful Marianne Jean-Baptiste (Secrets & Lies). THE WORD: Both a dream and a nightmare, this film puts a new twist on the phrase ‘devil in a red dress’. COMING TO: Video on Demand

BOMBSHELL BOMBSHELL TELLS THE STORY OF THE FALL OF FOX NEW CHIEF EXECUTIVE ROGER AILES, but the story isn’t really his, it belongs to the women whom he used and abused, and in particular to Fox anchor Megan Kelly. The film opens with her, and her infamous clash with Donald Trump as she calls him out during a live debate for “having a problem with women”. The strength and current relevance of this opening are what pull the audience in, along with an uncannily good performance by Theron (as Kelly) that outshines the film as a whole. Still director Jay Roach (Austin Powers, Trumbo) and writer Charles Randolph (The Big Short) craft a film that really moves and engages, aided by Nicole Kidman playing ousted “Fox and Friends” host Gretchen Carlson, and Margot Robbie (I, Tonya) as an ambitious young producer who’s a fictionalize amalgamation of several women who worked under Ailes, who played well by John Lithgow in a fat suit, comes off as both creepy and cartoonish. We also get cameos of Richard Kind (Inside Out) as Rudi Giuliani, and Malcolm McDowell (A Clockwork Orange) as Rupert Murdoch, Connie Britton (Nashville) and Ailes’s wife, and Allison Janney (I, Tonya) as Susan Estrich. But after Bombshell’s three blonde-bombshell leading ladies the best role belongs to Kate McKinnon (SNL) playing a closeted liberal lesbian producer trapped at Fox News because she can’t get a new job while wearing the stain of her current one. THE WORD: A somewhat dazzling mix of important and perhaps overly-playful, but welltimed, and a magnificent role for Theron. COMING TO: Video on Demand

METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

17

MARGARET CHO PUTTING THE B IN LGBT

BY ALEXANDER RODRIGUEZ

MARGARET CHO IS HANDS DOWN THE QUEEN OF MEDIA – film, stand

up, television, music, books, theatre, and now podcasting. She became an activist for LGBT rights, gender equality, sexual abuse victims, the homeless, racial diversity and more, before it was the popular Hollywood thing to do. She has five Grammy nominations and one Emmy nomination for work in comedy, acting and music – she’s taken selfies with Meryl Streep (televised live to millions), she’s marched in protests, survived a network sitcom and dated Quentin Tarantino. Some might argue that her comedy is vulgar, explicit and past political correctness – but you can’t deny the multitude of fans that follow her. Rolling Stone named her one of the 50 Best Stand Up Comics of All-Time.

Starting from an unconventional home, her mother fled an arranged marriage, her father wrote joke books and her parents owned a gay bookstore in 1970’s Haight District in San Francisco – to say her beginnings were colorful is an understatement. At a very early age, she worked as a phone sex operator and a dominatrix. Hitting the scene hard early on, she won a contest opening for Jerry Seinfield, hit the college circuit playing over 300 shows in two years, performed on The Arsenio Hall Show, and even performed on Bob Hope’s primetime special. She has a relationship with classic comedy greats as well as current contemporaries – she got to hang out at The Friars Club during the 80’s and 90’s and was mentored by

18

FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

METROSOURCE.COM

How is Margaret Cho the person and Margaret Cho the persona most different?

I guess I’m a pretty quiet and shy person. Part of what I do is about being really outgoing and I’m not really like that. I mean, I think most comedians are withdrawn people, we’re generally shy.

You have been very open about your sobriety, making news that you lived in a sober living home for a while. What was your tipping point?

I really loved being in the sober living home – I loved all the people I got to meet and lived with. You know, it was an important journey. I had an intervention! I didn’t have a choice. I had to go into rehab or face some pretty dire consequences. I didn’t have a tipping point myself; I was kind of forced into it. And I’m glad it happened.

Your sitcom, All American Girl, is 25 years old! The cast recently got together to chat about the show and its place in TV history as the first time we saw an Asian driven family show.

Do you think the show would have lasted longer if it was produced now? What would you have done differently?

Maybe. I would have loved to do it now. It was way ahead of its time. I think I would have gone into cable, even though at that time cable wasn’t what it is now. It was a different time. Cable was not thought of in the same way, but it would have given me a lot more freedom to be myself as a performer. Because I was doing stand-up comedy on cable and able to say anything.

What’s your motivation for your podcast, The Margaret Cho? I think it’s a lot of fun, and I already knew that. It’s a great chance to catch up with people that I never get to see, that I love so much – it’s hanging out and having fun with friends.

How would you define your sexuality?

I’m an old school bisexual, but then I also think that’s limiting because gender is more than just male and female. So, it’s not exactly the correct term but it’s something I appreciate that doesn’t get used a lot. Plus, I like saying “bi.”

I just must know, what was it like filming an episode of Golden Palace?

I loved Golden Girls and that I got to be there. Rue McClanahan humming in my ear… I had to sing on the show, and she hummed to me to get the pitch correct. It was so great she did that for me. I loved it.

Where do you see yourself in five years?

Hopefully doing a lot of comedy, movies, everything!

■ You can follow everything Margaret Cho on her website, margaretcho.com and listen to a new podcast episode every Tuesday: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-margaret-cho/id1470515305.

THIS PAGE: MARGARET CHO PHOTO BY LUKE FONTANA

CULTURE

PODCAST

her comedy father Robin Williams and her comedy mother, Joan Rivers, with whom she celebrated a very close relationship. She’s appeared in random places - with John Travolta in Face/Off, guest starred on Golden Palace, documentaries, and enjoyed a multi-year run on Lifetime’s Drop Dead Diva.

Life hasn’t always been full of comedy. But she has persevered and even made her experiences the butt of her jokes. Her stories have inspired fans to come out, so to speak, with their own strength and voice.

THE COST OF

SEPARATING

landmark 2015 Supreme Court ruling that legalized same-sex marriage across the country. But it ushered in a new era of dissolving those very same unions. It turns out that same-sex couples usually pay twice as much for divorces as their heterosexual counterparts. That climbs to triple if children are involved.

Because of the way marriage equality laws evolved, many gay and lesbian couples have had multiple relationship statuses. They may have started with a civil union. Later, they may have been domestic partners.

And some finally also tied the knot.

To add to the complexity, many same-sex couples were together for years, even decades before they were allowed to marry. That can be an expensive problem in a divorce. Most courtrooms will only divide assets starting from the time a couple actually got married.

State laws vary. For example, those in civil unions may need to establish residency in the state where the union was performed in order to dissolve the relationship. But if you were legally married, you may now get divorced in any state. Here are some considerations when contemplating the complicated idea of divorce.

STOCK PHOTO COPYRIGHT: PHOTO BY RAWPIXEL

DURATION OF RELATIONSHIP Because same-sex marriage has only recently been recognized, it can be difficult to figure out the start date of a relationship. Should a couple’s entire co-habitation be considered part of the marriage? Consider a same-sex couple who has been together for 25 years and got married once it was legal to do so. When their relationship ends, how long was their marriage for the purposes of alimony/maintenance? And how does that influence what property will be on the table for just and equitable distribution?

TAX ISSUES Even though the Supreme Court found the Federal Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional, issues persist for couples in domestic partnerships and civil unions. Many tax issues will persist for these couples regarding property distribution and alimony. This includes: Property Transfers - Transferring or distributing property between same-sex spouses may be subject to federal income tax Alimony/Spousal Maintenance Taxation - Spousal maintenance/alimony is typically tax-deductible by the payer, and taxable to the recipient.

However, divorced same-sex couples may not able to deduct maintenance/alimony payments Access Issues - Dividing retirement plans, in general, poses unique challenges for same-sex couples. In some instances, same-sex partners are not allowed access to information about their partner’s finances, such as pension or retirement accounts.

RESIDENCY Same-sex couples may experience problems when they marry or enter into a civil union or state-registered domestic partnership if they have either (1) never lived in the state where married or registered, or (2) their relationship ends while living outside of that state. Most states have some kind of residency requirement, often requiring one or both people to reside in the state for a month prior to being able to file for divorce.

CULTURE

THE FIGHT FOR MARRIAGE EQUALITY MAY HAVE CULMINATED in the

FINANCE

If you’re not careful when you enter into a committed relationship, the price of ending it could be much higher than heartbreak. BY JENNIFER DAY

LEGAL DISSOLUTION OF ALL LEGAL RELATIONSHIPS Many couples also may have gotten married or registered in multiple states or countries. When a couple is divorcing, they need to make sure to disclose all of these legal relationships to make sure that the court dissolves all of them.

As difficult as the topic of divorce can be, once you’re sure that it’s make sure to know all of the facts, associated costs and seek local counsel when ready.

HOPE Now to end on a positive note, here are some fabulous, long-term, gay and lesbian relationships that have stood the test of time:

Lily Tomlin and Jane Wagner (Together 45 years, Married 6 years) George Takei and Brad Altman (Together 33 years, Married 11 years) Elton John and David Furnish (Together 26 years, Married 5 years) Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi (Together 15 years, Married 11 years) Cynthia Nixon and Christine Marinoni (Together 15 years, Married 7 years) Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka (Together 15 years, Married 5 years) ■

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THE ART OF LOOKING BACK

CULTURE

BOOKS

An artist revisits one of her first published collections of photography, and a lush book gives NYC’s famous murals a standing ovation. BY SEBASTIAN FORTINO

NAN GOLDIN IS AN OPENLY BISEXUAL PHOTOGRAPHIC

NAN GOLDIN - THE OTHER SIDE

By Nan Goldin & Bea Rogers With Interviews by Sunny Suits & Joey Gabriel STEIDL; $55.00

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bodies, the AIDS epidemic, and the opioid crisis. Here, she revisits one of her first photography books which was released in 1993. In “The Other Side,” Goldin captures the stories of the drag queens and transgender friends she made in places as familiar as New York and Boston, and as far-flung as The Phillipines and Bangkok.

In her words,“This book is about beauty. And about love for my friends.” In this new release, the photographs are coupled with interviews that reveal the stories of her subjects. Thus, we are not only seeing them through her lens but also meeting them in their own words.

This may be the perfect time for such a masterpiece to be “remastered” (so to speak) – with RuPaul and his “girls” becoming household names and drag queens read stories to children in public libraries. That’s because Goldin was capturing drag as it was becoming more than just entertainment for bars and night clubs.

It was ascending to a cultural phenomenon that extended beyond its original audiences. In addition, the original book chronicled the queer experience in the 1980s and 1990s at the height of the AIDS epidemic.

So it serves as reminder that, though we have come a long way in terms of diagnosis, treatment and addressing stigma, there is still work to do. Though many of Goldin’s subjects have sadly left us, at least they can be celebrated for the beauty they possessed and shared – with Goldin’s lens and our eyes.

THIS PAGE: IMAGES FROM “TTHE ART OF LOOKING BACK” COURTESY STEIDL / NOKOLAI NAN GOLDIN & BEA ROGERS

ARTIST. Her main subjects include exploring LGBTQ

THIS PAGE: “MURALS OF NEW YORK CITY” IMAGERY COURTESY RIZZOLI/ JOSHUA MCHUGH

DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE? COULD YOU EVEN PICK JUST ONE? Have you

gaped in awe walking under the starry skies of the Main Concourse at Grand Central Terminal? Do remember Cher (as Loretta) proclaming the giant Chagalls at the Metropolitan Opera House “gaudy”? Even if only in transit or in a movie theater, chances are you have come into contact with more of New York’s great assemblage of public paintings than you realize. In this splendid book, we are reminded that if New York’s public works were gathered into one museum, it would undoubtedly be the greatest grouping of populist art in America. Or, in the words of Graydon Carter’s introduction, “That so many of the splendid examples of the muralist’s art are in New York is a blessing to anyone who lives in the city. In the pages of this splendid book, ... they come alive, beckoning in miniature for the reader to make the journey to the sources. As much as each painting tells a story, there is a story behind each painting.”

What’s more, you can contemplate the majesty of certain of these walls and with drink in hand. “Old King Cole was a merry old soul,” the nursery rhyme tells us. So, next time you’re close to the Saint Regis Hotel, stop into the King Cole Bar where you can admire Maxwell Parrish’s imagining of him while sipping the bar’s signature cocktail: the house-invented Bloody Mary. Or you can stop for a sacred martini at the tony Carlyle Hotel. In the Carlyle Restaurant, formerly known as Bemelmans Bar, sippers and diners alike can enjoy the only public display of illustrator Ludwig Bemelmans work anywhere in the world! Both its mural-filled walls - and, whimsically, its lampshades - pay tribute to the magic and majesty of nearby central park. You may even be able to spot Bemelman’s most iconic creation Madeline, who famously stood in rows of “twelve little girls in two straight lines.” One can imagine her teacher, Miss Clavel, like any tourist traveling with children in New York, would surely be grateful to settle in here for an aperitif to wash away the cares of the day.

MURALS OF NEW YORK CITY: THE BEST OF NEW YORK’S PUBLIC PAINTINGS FROM BEMELMANS TO PARRISH

By Glenn Palmer-Smith with an introduction by Graydon Carter and photographs by Joshua McHugh Rizzoli New York; $45.00 US

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GRIMES

MISS ANTHROPOCENE (4AD RECORDS): ON HER HIGHLY ANTICIPATED FIFTH STUDIO ALBUM, the otherworldly avant-pop act plans

LA ROUX

TENNIS

THE THIRD STUDIO RELEASE FROM THE ANDROGYNOUS,

THE BUZZY, HUSBAND-AND-WIFE INDIE DUO ARE ABOUT

British electro-pop crooner is out later this winter. Her first record in five years is a retro-tinged fantasy inspired heavily by the likes of new wave heroes The Eurythmics, The Human League and OMD. Supervision’s savage lead single “International Woman of Leisure” is a sort of kiss-off to an ex-lover and features La Roux’s instantly recognizable falsetto against a feel good, disco-esque hook. She’ll tour the globe extensively throughout the year bringing the party to a city near you.

TO RETURN with the most stripped down record of

SUPERVISION (SUPERCOLOUR RECORDS):

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SWIMMER (MUTUALLY DETRIMENTAL):

their decade-long career. Vocalist Alaina Moore on the lush lead single, “Runner:”“We were living off the grid, anchored in a fisherman’s cove called San Juanico. The only instruments we had on board were an acoustic guitar and a drum sequencer, but the limitations seemed to work in our favor.” For fans of ‘70s pop, notably Fleetwood Mac, Carole King and The Carpenters.

THIS PAGE: LA ROUX - CREDIT SUPERCOLOUR RECORDS • GRIMES - CREDIT 4AD RECORDS • TENNIS - CREDIT BIG HASSLE MEDI

CULTURE

MUSIC

to journey along a multitude of musical highways. The opening track, “So Heavy I Fell Through the Earth” is a fantastical, six-minute opus featuring her signature whispers against a mysterious yet intriguing electronic beat. The goal of the release is to bring attention to our growing, international climate challenges. With tracks titles such as “Delete Forever,”“My Name is Dark,”“Violence,” and “You’ll Miss Me When I’m Not Around,”you should expect the release to take a gloomy, direct turn as it progresses.

COUNTRY STARS DISMISSING CONSERVATISM

THIS PAGE: KACEY MUSGRAVES - CREDIT UNIVERSAL MUSIC GROUP NASHVILLE • BRANDI CARLISLE - CREDIT ALYSSE GAFKJEN • DIXIE CHICKS - CREDIT VIJAT MOHINDRA. • KESHA - CREDIT DANA TRIPPE

ON A RECENT EPISODE OF THE “SPIRITUALGASM” PODCAST, Dixie Chicks’

Natalie Maines revealed that the band is currently putting the final touches on their first new record in fourteen years due out later this year, tentatively titled Gaslighter. While this record will mostly chronicle her recent divorce, it’ll also touch upon the state of America under Trump. If you recall, the Dixie Chicks famously lost all support from the country community during the Bush years when they criticized his 2003 invasion of Iraq by stating “we don’t want this war, this violence, and we’re ashamed that the President of the United States is from Texas.”They had to rebuild their career almost entirely from scratch and ultimately took home a sea of Grammys in 2006 for their resulting album, Taking the Long Way. Taking on the heavily right-leaning industry was beyond bold at the time. Since then, we’ve seen quite a few acts break from the mold. Notably, Kacey Musgraves who has been releasing music for some time but became a household name -- and a favorite amongst queers who appreciate twang -with her latest release, the multi-award winning Golden Hour. She’s talked openly and nonchalantly of her unequivocal support for LGBTQ issues, gun control, abortion rights and climate policy. Singer-songwriter Brandi Carlisle, who has gone from a shy folk singer to a stadium-headliner is openly lesbian and frequently crosses over into the country realm with her genre-defying music. Her lyrics regularly touch upon women’s equality / empowerment and the international refugee crisis. Kudos to all of these incredible women for refusing to back down for what’s right.

ESSENTIAL LISTENING: KACEY MUSGRAVES “Rainbow”and “High Horse”

BRANDI CARLISLE “The Joke”and “The Story”

DIXIE CHICKS “Goodbye Earl”and “Not Ready to Make Nice”

KESHA

HIGH ROAD (RCA RECORDS / KEMOSABE): WHILE HER PREVIOUS RELEASE, THE CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED RAINBOW,

tackled a bevy of deep, personal issues, its followup High Road is a near polar-opposite. As she recently told Rolling Stone, for this release she “reconnected to the unrestrained joy and wildness that’s always been a part of me -- and in this process I have had the most fun I’ve ever had making a record.”Returning to her pop roots, the album features “Raising Hell”, a frenetic duet with New Orleans bounce queen Big Freedia -- and even a guest appearance from a gospel choir! On “My Own Dance,” “Kinky” and “Tonight,” the Kesha of yesteryear has returned in a major way -- sass, raunch and energy galore. She brings the tempo down and showcases her often unappreciated vocal talents on“Resentment”featuring Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys and rising country star Sturgill Simpson. Somehow Kesha’s released the album of the summer in January.

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THIS PAGE: FRANZ SZONY

24

TOM

GOSS IS LEARNING TO LIKE THE HAPPY ACCIDENT How the Gay Troubadour’s World Travels Finally Brought Him Face to Face — With Himself

BY KEVIN PHINNEY AS WE SPEAK, GOSS IS GETTING THE FIRST SHOWS OF A NEW TOUR UNDER HIS BELT. And these concerts — like the new Territories

album they highlight — mark a 180-degree turn from anything he’s attempted before. To hear Goss tell it, he’d been using his guitar as armor for so long he felt naked onstage without it.

But then something happened that changed everything.

Renowned as one of the most visibly off-the-market troubadours on the gay music circuit, Goss walked in to find his husband cheating on him. They’ve been together 14 years and married for nine.

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The revelation threw him into a tailspin. So much of his sixalbum discography glowingly touts his one-on-one bond with husband Mike. Knowing those songs can never be heard again the same way, he had plenty to consider. They could have called it quits then and there; many do. Instead, Goss and his husband decided to rethink their union, and after some soul searching, they launched a 2.0 version of their marriage as “an open relationship — with boundaries.”

That renegotiation undergirds Territories, the most adventurous Tom Goss album ever, and their new shared reality has become a metaphor for life without a net. Serendipitously, living a less predictable life also helped Tom find his inner daredevil.

Of course, self-reflection is vital for a musician who writes from life experience and leans on words like “intentional” to convey a deliberative nature. But its meaning seems to have shifted lately. These days, his “intentional” means making informed choices as well as mastering feats of determination.

“Well, making Territories hasn’t been easy,”says its composer.

“But it has been interesting. This record has been very uncomfortable, because the artistic journey came after the emotional journey, and that really started with “Berlin.’”

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PHOTOS 26-27 COURTESY OF TOM GOSS

ALWAYS IS NOT FOREVER

NEW TERRITORIES In a music video that evokes Erotica-era Madonna, “Berlin” drapes synths and singers over a backdrop of sensory delights. There, in a city known for its libertine pastimes, Goss tumbles headlong into an overnight romance. And, in case you’re a longtime fan who thinks he’s only watching Tom’s fantasy play out, the short ends with the pair whispering,“I love you”to each other.

“For me, sexuality and intimacy are a part of caring for someone,” he confides. “If someone’s not nice, it doesn’t matter how hot they are; I’m not interested. The experience of learning what my husband wanted triggered my own journey. I realized I’m not capable of being physical with someone without having an emotional entanglement.”

Since he couldn’t go back, Goss decided to see what the unknown present might hold. And the more the rabbit hole telescoped away, the more he had to know what was down there — inside him.

“I’m always going to be introspective, you know,”he laughs.“I started making music because I wasn’t satisfied with the messages I was hearing around me. Music impacts our lives in a way that goes past understanding. If I was using my music simply to make money and become famous, I sure wouldn’t have made the records I have made up until now. I always want to be tackling deeper truths and keep the main focus on being honest, being very intentional and asking everyone, including myself, to think.”

Always “an instigator,” Goss dug a deep well and filled it with rage.“Being an athlete, I was used to being physical, aggressive and strong,”says Goss.

“I’ve always been one of the best. Maybe it was about entering the male-dominated alpha world of adolescence, but I started getting into fights with people at school — including my coaches — and getting arrested for assault and disorderly conduct.

Remember Jenny Jones? That was me. I don’t think anything happens in a vacuum, though. There were certainly a lot of external things going on, but the vast majority was me and my failure to integrate my differentness with the world around me.”

Tom Goss has been thinking for a very long time.

GETTING A GRIP Goss was born in 1981 to a Catholic pair of gymnasium owners in Quincy, Illinois. As the middle brother of three, he describes himself as “a pleaser who’s incapable pleasing anyone. My parents divorced and both remarried. But my brothers and I were born almost within 30 days of each other, two years apart. We did almost everything together.”

Athletics were woven into the Goss family DNA, and at an early age little Tom started training three or four hours a day, four or five days a week. Generally, he played several sports at a time, and developed a competitive streak that persists to this day. Having a locomotive body and a sharp personality at his command very quickly became a problem: “I was a terror,” he admits. “I really felt misunderstood and invisible a lot of the time.

I couldn’t please anyone and didn’t understand why.”

SWITCHING OFF He was expelled in 9th grade and placed in an alternative school (“kind of a holdover for kids from juvie,” he’ll say) that accommodated troubled kids who couldn’t play well with others.

Unlike most, Goss looked around and decided, “this is not the direction my life should be heading.” He took his rage internal, then turned to wrestling as a physical outlet.

Insofar as sexuality was concerned, Goss says he didn’t have any. “I shut it off like a switch,” he says. Redirected, his physical prowess soon won him friends and the favorable notice of coaches.

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CRITICAL MASS It made perfect sense then that Goss would enter the seminary upon graduation. “The idea of moving back to Wisconsin, marrying a girl and coaching or teaching seemed completely suffocating to me,”he says in retrospect. The idea of being a priest calmed my heart. It seemed like I was choosing my own path.”

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For many, the biggest detriment to the priesthood is celibacy. “But I was already celibate,” Goss maintains. “I wasn’t dating. I wasn’t even masturbating.” Ironically enough, it was at seminary in DC that he fell in love for the first time — with a man he describes as funny, shy and chubby.“We fell in love,” he says,“and for the first time I felt sexual attraction. It wasn’t that I was asexual. It was that I’m attracted to chubby guys.”

Their affair continued on the DL. “And one night, I found one of the guys I was living with standing at the foot of my bed, watching me sleep. I mean, we were supposed to be brothers, right? This kind of behavior had been escalating for a while. Even though I was getting more and more uncomfortable, I had to be in close contact all day every day. I would eat every single meal with him, see him at mass, prayer, meetings — everywhere.”

Looking back, Goss says,“I’ve never been raped, but I have a little understanding of that fear. I certainly was fearful. I was living three feet away. We shared a wall and he was doing whatever he could to make sexual advances towards me. It was horrible, and after he showed up in my room, I finally started talking about it. Once the people in the house heard about

PHOTOS 28-29 COURTESY OF TOM GOSS

about life, society, economics and religion. And if I’d say, ‘I’m not really sure I see it the same way,’ their response would be, ‘Oh, we understand what you’re saying, but you don’t really count. You’re different.’ So, I got used to being interesting but irrelevant and completely discounted. I still feel like that a lot.”

That pattern continued through college in Missouri. “I was turning myself off,” he shrugs. “Since I was an athlete, I showered with 60 guys a day. These are earnest, fit, young and beautiful Midwesterners — the people you would want to see in fashion or porn magazines. And I wasn’t attracted to them.

I literally didn’t think I had that drive. I thought the world was lying about love, since I’d never felt it. So, I made good friends, men and women, and was more interested in the person than the package they appeared in.”

to see their brilliance and success? It’s one of the most inspirational things you can imagine.”

Over the last decade as a singer/songwriter, Goss has documented his marriage (“You Know That I Love You”from 2012), his attraction (“Bears” the following year) and domestic violence (in “La Bufadora” featuring Daniel Franzese). Now when Goss bounds out onto the stage, he’s also stepping out of his own shadow.

IT’S INTENTIONAL

what was going on, he got kicked out, and less than a week later I had someone else doing the same thing.”

A DIFFERENT CALLING Because the church condones homosexuality privately and condemns it in public, his fellow seminarians began to shun him for breaking their code of silence. Once again, he was voiceless and invisible.“That was the moment I realized this is not an environment for me,”he says.“It was damaging and unhealthy and so I quit, and 24 hours later, I found a place to live, packed my bags and moved. Everybody immediately disappeared from my life. I think they saw my independence and not being quiet as dangerous for them.”

Now Goss says he’s grateful for the experience because “had they not done what they did, I might have spent years in the wrong place.”

That’s when he decided to make music. As a teenager, Goss followed Dave Matthews Band across the country and had a huge thing for the music of Seal. Now, with nothing more than a job at Starbucks, he decided to make a record. And a few weeks after leaving seminary, he met his husband Mike on Yahoo personals.

“I’ve spent a lot of time in my career being afraid of what people thought,” he’ll say. “And honestly, I wasn’t sure I could pull this show off. I thought there’d be people who wouldn’t understand it. Being someone who is a multi-instrumentalist, I’ve had my own judgements about not playing instruments when singing. But I’ve come to realize it doesn’t matter. To stand there and have the music move through you without anything but your vocal skills? It’s become transformational. For me, shedding the guitar was like shedding a shield, and learning how to access a more honest, more emotional side of myself. I think that’s made the show exponentially better.”

As David Bowie once said,“Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.”If this is a moment of clarity, Goss is making the most of it. Having come out to his family years ago by letter, he invited them to see his new show recently in Chicago.

“My whole family came to see me perform,”he says with a smile.“And I began the show talking about opening up my relationship, which is not really something you want to have your mother in the audience for.”

As the show began, “I was trying hard not to focus on them, I was trying to be invisible to them. Then I caught myself, and thought, ‘No, if you feel unseen and unheard you need to be performing only to them.

Shine so brightly they can’t ignore you. I was so big and so open and so honest, I had one of the most incredible shows of my life.”

Then he and his family then met up for dinner, he laughs, “and no one mentioned it. Not a word. But you know what? That’s okay. I think that I need to write songs, make videos, painfully reveal my heart to the world. That’s not who they are. But that’s who I am.”

■

TOM GOSS NAKED Goss released his first album, Naked Without, in 2006, “without any idea what I was doing. But once I’d done it, I wanted to play it live, then make a video and go on tour. It all just snowballed from there. As I toured, I got to meet amazing people living their dreams who were wounded just like me. Finding people with less and from worse circumstances, and getting METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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YOU’VE GOT

MALE

A Pair of Documentarians Explore the Sudden Rise and Fall of the Gay Fashion Bible Known as INTERNATIONAL MALE

BY KEVIN PHINNEY IN AN ERA WHERE MEN PERCEIVED AS GAY WERE OFTEN DEPICTED AS EITHER PATHETIC OR PARIAHS, International Male asked its audience to reconsider its deeply rooted homophobia.

Now a new documentary called All Man: The International Male Story is depicting the rise and fall of the edgy menswear catalog, which ceased its mail order operation more than a dozen years ago.

Fun Facts: The word “gay” never appeared in the catalog as a reference to either the fanciful fashions or the men who modeled them. Most of the IM models were actually straight — which some say helped lend appeal to even the most off-the-charts outfits.

But make no mistake: just as Elvis made it cool to bump and grind in the ‘50s and the Beatles helped long hair become masculine again, International Male helped move the needle on gender expression.

The creators of the catalog, comprised of men and women whose sexuality ran the gamut, were a fashion-forward vanguard whose ideas pushed boundaries in the decades between David Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust and red-carpet Billy Porter.

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PHOTO COURTESY OF ALL MAN MOVIE

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producer/directors Bryan Darling and Jesse Finley Reed pose with Queer Eye star Carson Kressley.

According to All Man co-director Bryan Darling, “If you had a mailbox, International Male gave you access to the resources to dress in new expressive ways. Remember that this is predominantly a time before the internet: you only knew of what you were directly exposed to, and in many ways, things were really limited.”

While roomy draped suits were all the rage (Arsenio, anyone?) and most everyday American men were confined to their Banana Republic uniforms, International Male dared to propose alternatives. Some of their suggestions were outrageous, says Darling, because IM definitely“wasn’t the catalog for khakis and a blue blazer.

It was for something different; garments intentionally cut tighter to the body in a range of colors and styles atypical of mainstream men’s fashion. There were belts, zippers, pleats, puffy shirts, silks, underwear, and … well, you get the drift.”

Over time, the catalog only pushed the envelope more. “As much as people like to tease and parody International Male, it really was new fashion to a lot of people,” says the filmmaker. “The staff recounts stories of how, while on photoshoots, dads with their families

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would come up and say how much they loved the clothes. The staff would always be shocked, but this catalog was having an effect in many different people’s lives.”

PHOTOS 32-33 COURTESY OF ALL MAN MOVIE

EXPRESS YOURSELF

BRAWN DAWN The documentary delves deep into the International Male archives to explore how, even at the outset, the catalog set itself apart from the mainstream.

Darling’s directing partner, Jesse Finley Reed, calls IM the brainchild of Gene Burkard that started out “in a small beach cottage in San Diego. Gene got to see the world while selling supplies to military bases throughout Europe and Africa. And it was during these travels that he noticed European men, and how they seemed more expressive in their fashion. He thought to himself, “Why can’t American men do the same?”

According to the company lore, “One night in London while walking by a medical supply store, he saw a pair of underwear in the window … they were probably for incontinence or something less than sexy, but this became his “Ah-Ha” moment. When he returned to the States, he created ‘The “Sock,’ a jockstrap-like piece of underwear, using fabric, staples and tape to make a prototype to show the seamstress. A little later he borrowed $5,000 to run an ad in Playboy… yes, Playboy. And it went gangbusters.”

That company was originally called Brawn of California, and by 1976 had expanded into International Male. By the end of the decade, the brand was as ubiquitous as the soundtrack to Saturday Night Fever.

IT’S REIGNING MEN By the early ‘80s, many of the recurring models featured in IM catalogs were developing followings of their own. And, because of the skimpy swimsuits and in-your-face fashions — as well as the handsome men modeling them — many boys coming of age developed their first crushes on the stars of their glossy wish books.

Those elements were at the nexus of what made International Male required reading, says Reed. “We actually believe it’s the trifecta of three things: the fashions, the models, and the freedom — or selfexpression, we sometimes like to say. To make it successful and unique it needed all three of those elements. Sure, for different people, different aspects win out. I mean, some gay men we’ve spoken to practically had relationships with their favorite model.”

After a pause, he reconsiders. “I am joking,” says Reed.“In fact, almost all the models were straight. And for gay men, it’s always a shock to learn that the catalog had a large, straight male and female audience as well.

But think back to Miami Vice and Don Johnson in his pink suit… Where would you find something like that in your mall? Sears? Macys? International Male created choice, as well as access to everyday people throughout the US — and even better, you could get it sent to your mailbox. So, no one had to know.”

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PUFF DADDIES For more than a decade, International Male cruised along as a secret of the gay underground, with a few straights who viewed the catalog as their occasional walk on the wild side. Eventually the owners launched a spinoff called Undergear. Now also serving retail customers out of a small outlet at the edge of West Hollywood, IM sat atop its own little niche in the fashion world by creating a space where men could dress to please themselves, their gay counterparts or ... like something off the cover of a ladies’ romance novel set in the 1800s.

To this day, no one can confirm that the Puffy Shirt episode of Seinfeld was the moment when Middle America first took notice of International Male. Sure, Prince and Jimi Hendrix had rocked the pirate shirt look on stages years earlier, but few dared to don such garments on any day not called Halloween.

“We haven’t had a chance to talk with Jerry Seinfeld or Larry David in person,” Reed admits, “but we have had many people tell us that the Puffy Shirt was, in fact, inspired by the IM shirt. Rumor has it that Seinfeld’s costume designers shopped at the West Hollywood store, where they bought the Ultimate Poet’s Shirt (aka the Puffy Shirt) and it and subsequently inspired the show.

We cannot yet confirm that it’s true. But we’re working on it.”

David Knight

VICTIM OF SUCCESS

Reed nods. “Our working assumption at the moment is that the parent company, Hanover Direct (who bought Brawn in the mid-’80s), didn’t really know how to keep the brand relevant as competition grew.

Towards the end, the catalog seemed to be pulling out all the stops without a clear, definitive vision … and perhaps became the parody it was always fighting against.”

Thirty years after their splashy debut, International Male was no more, and Underwear mailed its last catalog in 2015. But, for an entire pre-internet generation, IM will be fondly remembered for the fantasies its readers lived out through its pages.

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Robert Goold

PHOTOS 34-35 COURTESY OF ALL MAN MOVIE

So... what happened? How did this fashion pioneer disappear just as LGBTQ people were becoming more accepted?

“There are a few answers,” muses Darling, “but I think one that rises to the top is actually in your question: the world changed and became more accepting, and because of that, International Male was no longer unique. They had built their brand as an outlier, as a one of a kind place for boundary-pushing men’s clothing, which allowed them to present a new kind of man — a new masculinity, you could argue. And although they were an early adopter to the internet and had an online store, they quickly became one of many.”

David Knight

“As gay men ourselves,” Darling adds,“we had only read it as something exclusively for gay men when we started. But, as we mentioned before, International Male was for any guy who wanted boundary-pushing fashion. The catalog had lots of different audiences: urban and rural; black and white; gay and straight, the list goes on. There were many celebrities who shopped there, too — everyone from (the boy band) 98 Degrees to Burt Reynolds. In our interview with Carson Kressley, he talked a lot about how it provided the groundwork for the metrosexual movement, and that men could wear clothes just for fun. So, the magazine-catalog, or magalog, was very much a how-to lifestyle guide, too. There are many tales of women taking their men into the stores in Southern California to dress them more like Don Johnson or Fabio.

ROCKING THE DOC “Obviously,” says Reed,“there are a lot of ways to tell this story, and certainly a lot of yummy visual candy to bring viewers in. But in all honesty, the documentary is about a lot more than lilac-colored Aviator Jumpsuits. The reason we’re making the film is because we became fascinated with how a little clothing catalog helped transform ideas about

masculinity and self-expression in men in America. The catalog being labeled ‘gay’ is probably at the heart of our motivation. Although it never printed the word, it was chronically associated as such. Why? Because it depicted men in a new way. And because of that, it was seen as a threat to masculinity.”

Darling wants to amplify that.“Labeling something as ‘gay’ is heteronormative masculinity’s way of defending itself,” he says.

“As documentarians, we are attracted to this story because it can be used to explore broader cultural shifts that were taking place: the rise of the objectified male body, a growing LGBTQ presence, and greater selfexpression. A lot of people associate IM with a greater freedom, which it did provide. At the same time, it set up a model of self-expression tied to increasingly hyper-masculine physiques. Additionally, aside from Shemar Moore and a few other models of color, the publication was predominantly populated with images of whiteness. We’re aiming to unpack all of that in the documentary.”

■ (Look for All Man: The International Male Story at film festivals later this year.

Updates will be available online via allman@internationalmalemovie.com) METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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WITH HIV/AIDS RECEDING FROM EPIDEMIC TO A MANAGEABLE CHRONIC AILMENT THANKS TO THE COCKTAIL, sex is back. Certainly, it’s a sexuality tempered by the tough lessons of the crisis, but city officials are considering loosening restrictions on bath houses shuttered for 20 years or more. And there’s no better barometer of what’s happening among sex-positive gay men than the resurrection of Drummer magazine. We sat down and talked with the publisher, the new editor and the former editor-in-chief who never lost faith that the magazine would rise again one day.

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PHOTO COURTESY OF DRUMMER MAGAZINE

A celebration of all things gay, leather, masculine and sexual — free from misogyny, transphobie and racism. BY KEVIN PHINNEY

METROSOURCE: How would you explain what Drummer was and is to someone who’s unfamiliar?

Former Editor Jack Fritscher: Well, Drummer was founded in 1975 as a pioneering gay-identity magazine for leathermen coming out of the closet.

Our manifesto in every issue was our tagline quote from Henry David Thoreau — marching to the beat of one’s own different drummer. We made our I-AmWho-I-Am reputation by daring to salute the emerging sexual identity and authenticity of a class of masculine-identified gay men; men who were otherwise not represented in the soft new gay press. We fed a hunger. Masturbation is magical thinking. So, Drummer was invented to add erotic realism to the magical thinking of one-handed readers trying to conjure the real deal of S&M pleasures. Of course, Drummer did not invent leathermen. But we did bring leather culture out of the closet, created a community and earned leather folk a rainbow stripe in gay popular culture. Drummer was a huge influencer from the start, and its contents were a first draft of leather history and how we lived.

Current Editor Mike Miksche: And even today with the relaunch, we continue to run that Thoreau quote in every issue. We also include a statement by Jack MacCallum that explains what we stand for, and there’s one sentence that really sums it up for me. In his words,“Our goal is to celebrate masculine, gay leather sexuality that is free of misogyny, transphobia, and racism of any kind.”

METROSOURCE: What do you think its function was at the time when it was first introduced?

Publisher Jack MacCullum: I believe it was started as a novelty and evolved into this amazing magazine that normalized kink. It made men realize they weren’t alone in their sexual feelings and desires.

Fritscher: In that first post-Stonewall decade, Drummer helped create the very leather culture it reported on. Guys used our articles, stories, drawings and photos as their leather suggestion book validating their emerging S&M style and behavior. So did the fashion industry. Drummer was also influential in shaping leather identity. In 1977, when he was virtually unknown, Robert Mapplethorpe flew from his studio in New York to the Drummer office in San Francisco hoping to find models and publicity. He asked if I’d publish his photos, because he understood the power of Drummer’s voice. Drummer helped Mapplethorpe reveal his genius. In fact, many New Yorkers came to Drummer for a kind of coverage they could not get in Manhattan. People like filmmaker Wakefield Poole, erotic artist Rex; Wally Wallace, manager of the Mineshaft. The magazine functioned internationally to publish and introduce isolated gay talents. On his first trip to the US, Tom of Finland flew to the Drummer office. Legendary author, Samuel Steward, intimate friend of Gertrude Stein and Alice B. Toklas, contributed his “Phil Andros” stories and then dubbed our talent pool the “Drummer Salon.”

Robert Opel (famous for streaking naked before TV cameras at the Oscars), who was fleeing the LAPD in Los Angeles, came to Drummer as our staff writer and photographer until he was murdered in 1979. Artist Al Shapiro quit as art director at Queens Quarterly to become art director of Drummer. Glenn Hughes, the leatherman of the Village People, and Michael Fesco, founder of the Flamingo disco in New York, partied in our Drummer Salon. Drummer’s secret sauce was sperm: we were all bonding and balling each other. Mapplethorpe and I ran a very hot love affair for years. Drummer was a magazine of practical fantasy, of interesting people taking a walk on the wild side during the Titanic 1970s before the first-class party cruised on, oblivious to the iceberg of HIV dead ahead.

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METROSOURCE: This is not at all the same world where Drummer first appeared. How is the mission of the magazine similar to, or different from, its original iteration?

MacCullum: I really don’t believe the Drummer of the ’70s and ’80s is so different than what we’re publishing today. Men are generally more aware of their sexual interests and what gets them off, but all in all, I don’t believe much has changed when it comes to content.

Miksche: Yeah, we’ve been trying to stay as true to the editorial mission of the past.

The times have changed, the way people read have changed, but I like to think that the spirit of the magazine is the same today as it was back then, just a more modern take.

METROSOURCE: Assimilation into mainstream culture is a very real thing, as is being co-opted. And it’s been happening since the Village People and before. In that way, is Drummer saying something socially relevant about that?

MacCullum: Absolutely, I believe there is a definite need for Drummer today. It goes beyond just the entertainment factor. I believe that there’s an isolation and disconnect today, much like there was in the 70’s and 80’s, but fewer places to turn. Drummer magazine steps in and lets men know that there are others out there with the same

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interests and desires.

Miksche: As I’ve said, this is a very unique period because of things like PrEP and U=U, and when I look around at the events I’m going to, I see guys enjoying themselves in a way that I didn’t see 10 or 15 years ago.

The North American kink scene is becoming more like Berlin now, and I think it’s great. There are a lot of people who don’t like it and think this newfound sexual liberation is a dangerous thing. Well, Drummer today is saying that it’s not dangerous. We celebrate this moment in time.

PHOTOS 38-39 COURTESY OF DRUMMER MAGAZINE

METROSOURCE: So much has changed in terms of the gay community.

Why do you see the need for a magazine like Drummer now?

MacCullum: I believe there are men, gay, bisexual and even straight, even women who can relate to our content. There is something for everyone with a sexual kink and we’re really attempting to cover a lot of ground with our articles and photos.

Miksche: Agreed. And it’s interesting. I was speaking to Chad Bush, who runs Pig Week in Fort Lauderdale, about how because of things like PrEP and the acknowledgment that “undetectable equals untransmittable, or “U=U.” Gay men can enjoy their sexuality again in a way they couldn’t, even 10 years ago. Guys can finally explore their fetishes uninhibited. And in a lot of ways, our community can carry on where we left off in ’81 from a sexual liberation standpoint. I think we need magazines like Drummer to document that sexual progress, that exploration and the celebration of leather sexuality.

As far as I know, there isn’t a magazine like it in North America that’s doing what we’re doing, so I think there’s a need for it even more for that reason.

I hope we’re entering another golden era of gay sexuality. I can say that it certainly feels like we are — and if that’s the case, Drummer is here to report on it all.

METROSOURCE: Drummer has always marched to its own beat and was never going to be full of pretty boys like Blueboy, Instinct or In Touch. Was that intentional?

MacCullum: Regular men. The men we feature are simply normal guys who have an interest and are active in the kink they are being photographed participating in. We don’t use models or pretty men just for the aesthetic.

Miksche: Yeah, we’ve worked hard to use real guys whenever possible. I think that’s the appeal — what we’re presenting is as real as possible, and I believe men relate to that and they find it damned hot. That’s the sort of thing I’m into, anyway.

MacCullum: Our target audience are men who can be in a suit and tie, or regular jeans and t-shirts. But they’re simply average men once you strip their clothes off.

Miksche: Absolutely. I think it’s anybody who has even the slightest kinky inclination. We’re learning that our appeal is a lot broader than we had originally thought.

METROSOURCE: Was that approach tempered over the years, or did the magazine stick to its hardcore ethos?

Fritscher: Even during AIDS, Drummer never stopped publishing homocore reality and fantasy for leathermen, which expanded to include leatherwomen and other genders as each came out. The first woman mentioned in Drummer was Mapplethorpe’s model Cynthia Slater, founder of the S&M Society of Janus, in issue 27 in 1979. In fact, Drummer was created to incite masturbation.

So, our content, responsibly calculated to get men off solo, became a major source of safe hardcore entertainment to entertain the troops stuck home alone in Iowa during the war on AIDS. METROSOURCE: Do you have any sense of how hard your readership was hit by the AIDS crisis? It would make sense that the most sexually adventurous among gay men were also the ones at the highest risk.

Fritscher: In 1983, subscription mailings were coming back marked “Deceased.” We adjusted to the AIDS crisis by responsibly adjusting our fiction and illustrations to show safe sex, and by adding

feature columns on gay men’s health. Contrary to urban myth, leather sex is no more essentially risky than vanilla sex.

Drummer was always descriptive, not prescriptive, about sex. We described what was happening monthly, but never dictated“Thou Shalt”or“Thou Shalt Not.”There may be rules around sex, but no one’s sure what they are. In the 1970s window between penicillin and HIV, I often wrote cautionary editorials and columns about venereal disease and drug use. In the 1980s, we amplified this sex-positive editorial policy by glamorizing safe sex practices trying to make the antiseptic new ways hot.

But sexual adventure did not cause AIDS; a virus caused AIDS. In fact, Drummer pro-actively recommended S&M leather sex which seemed a bit safer, because fluid exchanges are not necessary in ritual scenes that are more about mutual masturbation than penetration. Nevertheless, we were as hard hit by AIDS as everyone else. No more. No less. We lost most of our best writers, artists, photographers and staff to the epidemic.

MacCullum: I was one of those men during the epidemic. I was one of those targeted men. I know exactly how difficult it was. Being a 57-yearold man, living in the three “hot zones” of HIV, METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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METROSOURCE: Of the new people involved in the re-launch, how did the magazine first come into your awareness?

Miksche: I was born in 1981 and I didn’t come out until about ’99, so it was before my time, actually. But years ago, an editor of mine who collected the original magazine introduced me to it — and the rest is history.

METROSOURCE: Who had the idea to revive Drummer? How did it happen?

MacCullum: It’s a bit of a long story, but upon a very rocky 2017 and 2018 in my title circuit, my partner Spike West did some research on who owned Drummer magazine. The internet is amazing, you can find pretty much anything you want with enough time and patience. Martijn Bakker, RoB of Amsterdam, still owned the original rights to the magazine, events and contest. Six months of negotiating, and I finalized the purchase in October of 2018, during Amsterdam Leather Pride Weekend. Why? I believe Drummer is a world institution. Something to be protected, and

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that should live. There are so many men that benefitted from the original magazine and so many more now that will.

Fritscher: When Jack MacCullum contacted me in 2019 about resurrecting Drummer after it closed shop in 1999, he was a knight in shining leather. He made my own private 20-year dream come true. I have been involved intimately with the magazine since 1975 and have contributed writing and photography to around 70 issues. I’ve written two documentary books about its institutional memory and run the online Drummer archives since 1995. So, we rubbed our enthusiasms together. When Jack asked about the editing of the new Drummer, my first thought was to recommend Mike Miksche, a writer whose career I have long admired.

The day those two leathermen, publisher and editor, sat with me at my kitchen table to chew the fat felt like a kickstart to a new chapter of Drummer history. I’m grateful at age 80 to be the consulting editor emeritus and a continuing contributor.

METROSOURCE: Moving forward, are there topics the original magazine shied away from that you’ll delve into?

Miksche: I don’t think the original magazine shied away from any topic. And we won’t either, as long as it’s not hateful, discriminatory or illegal. I think there are some upcoming topics that will make a lot of

PHOTOS 40-41 COURTESY OF DRUMMER MAGAZINE

New York, Los Angeles and San Francisco, I am painfully aware. Therefore, I believe it’s time for Drummer magazine to return. Men of my age miss the connections, and I know that younger men need something like the fraternity we were once a part of.

people uncomfortable but if a fetish exists out there, I will consider covering it.

MacCullum: Personally, I don’t think anything will be off the table, except children and animals.

METROSOURCE: Publications like Instigator clearly drew inspiration from the edginess gay men once associated with Drummer. In many ways, the people who would be most interested in your content now have so many places online to find it. How will you rebuild your fan base?

Miksche: I think first and foremost, it’s letting people who loved the original magazine know that Drummer is back. It’s also letting new leathermen know that we’re very different than Instigator or something like Alpha Tribe. We very much have a North American sensibility, and our focus is more on a nontoxic variant of masculinity, as well as leather and kink. We’ve been present at some leather and kink events across Europe and North America to spread the word to help rebuild our fan base and we’re expanding our social media presence, too.

MacCullum: We have a built-in base as well. Granted, most of the men that remember or know Drummer magazine are over 40 years old or more, but I know the younger audience will certainly be on board. Men have an almost romantic relationship with the magazine. Many of the men who remember Drummer from its

heyday and have seen the new issues feel we truly hit it out of the park.

METROSOURCE: From the success of online apps like SCRUFF and others, it seems leather and bear culture are alive and well. Are there plans to make your reboot more digital and cyber-friendly than its predecessor?

MacCullum: The magazine has been launched digitally with an option to pay a premium and receive print copies. I have to say, the online content doesn’t compare to the print copy. The photos are incredible, and this type of magazine experience is much better in print.

We are considering an app in the future, but that will most likely be a few years off.

METROSOURCE: As edgy as leather culture can be, it seems now the media light is shining most brightly on gender expression. What is the place of a publication like DRUMMER in a community that’s challenging gender stereotypes right now?

Miksche: When it comes to challenging gender stereotypes, I think it’s great that people who feel inhibited or harmed by them are free to express themselves in different ways that defy those norms. Drummer was and still largely is about raw masculinity and its allure, but it’s a nontoxic version of masculinity that we’re interested in. Our upcoming issue is “macho” themed because it’s an important part of the

magazine’s past. I believe that masculinity is one of the many gender expressions out there.

It’s not any better or worse than any other one and we don’t act like it is. It’s different and that’s what our magazine focuses on. Drummer is specifically for gay men, although we’re not in the business of defining what a“gay man”is.

If someone identifies as a gay man, then this magazine is for them.

METROSOURCE: If this relaunch succeeds, what will make you happiest?

Does it seem like Drummer fills a void in the world for each of you?

MacCullum: I intend on keeping the magazine going because it does fulfill a need that no one else addressed in the past. I need subscribers and advertisers to step up, but there’s nothing else being published today as insightful, or informative as this magazine in terms of leather culture. I see up going only higher and further in our future issues.

Miksche: For me, I’d be happiest to see our readership continue to grow not only in the major hubs like New York, San Francisco, and Los Angeles but to see people reading it in small cities, towns and rural areas. To know that we can help people enjoy and accept their kinky sexuality in places where it’s difficult to be gay, let alone kinky would be very gratifying and one of the ways I’d measure success. I think Drummer for sure fills a void because like Jack says, there’s nothing quite like it anywhere. ■ METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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BY JEFFREY JAMES KEYES

BULLYING, A CLEAR FORM OF YOUTH VIOLENCE, was officially defined by

the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (www.cdc.gov) as “any unwanted aggressive behavior(s) by another youth or group of youths, who are not siblings or current dating partners, that involves an observed or perceived power imbalance and is repeated multiple times or is highly likely to be repeated. Bullying may inflict harm or distress on the targeted youth including physical, psychological, social, or educational harm.” There are currently two modes and four types that youth can be bullied (or bully others). The two modes include direct bullying (bullying in the presence of the other) and indirect (spreading rumors).

Additionally, the four categories of bullying include physical, verbal, relational, and damage to property). Some warning signs of bullying include: unexplainable injuries, lost or destroyed property, stomach aches, headaches, changes in eating habits, declining grades, feelings of helplessness, and self-destructive behaviors.

Bullying, rampant in the United States, with 1 in every 5 high school students reported being bullied on school property. These statistics greatly increase with students who self-identify as lesbian, gay, or biseuxal with roughly 33% reporting bullying on school property in addition to cyberbullying. Why might children not report bullying? There are plenty of reasons including fear of being seen as weak or a “tattletale”, the fear of backlash, fear of judgement from adults, feeling like no one will care or understand, or even fear of rejection or losing support

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or their parent’s trust. Bullying frequently happens in middle schools, high schools, primary schools, and beyond. How does this affect these students psychologically? And what are the short and long term effects of bullying?

DoSomething.org reports that 1 in 5 students experience bullying with at least 37% of those bullied online. A UCLA study of over 2,000 students in Los Angeles area middle schools showed that a high level of bullying correlates to lower grades across all three years of middle school. Children who are bullied may experience depression and anxiety, increased feelings of sadness and loneliness, changes in their schedule including eating patterns and sleep, even loss of interest for the types of activities they used to enjoy. Grades can suffer, GPAs and standardized test scores can be reduced, they’re likely to miss or skip out of school and their overall health and wellness can be compromised. Even more alarming consequences of bullying range from physical injury, social/ emotional distress, self-harm, suicide, and even school shootings. It’s important to note that experiences children have ultimately shape the adults they become. The effects of bullying can follow a child throughout their life. Long term effects of bullying can include anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder, suicidal tendencies, depression, substance abuse, and more. Take bullying seriously, if you can identify a child is being bullied it’s important to contact a teacher or counselor in order to mediate and get the child the help they need. Finding a way to do

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BODY

HEALTH

BULLYING, CYBERBULLYING, AND STAND UP TO BULLYING DAY

regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity, or expression. These include developing supportive educators, comprehensive policies, inclusive curriculum, and support student GSAs, or student-led Gender and Sexuality Alliance clubs. Their work includes Ally Week, No NameCalling Week, GLSEN’s Safe Space Kit, Day of Silence, and Changing the Game. Their website offers extensive resources for educators, students, policy, and webinars and workshops.

STOPBULLYING.GOV Stopbullying.gov is a federal government website managed by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Their site provides information from various government agencies on what bullying is, who is at risk, how you can prevent and respond to bullying with information from the Department of Education, the Department of Health and Human Services, and the Department of Justice. This site illustrates warning signs for bullying, effects of bullying, diversity, race & religion, as well as details about LGBTQ Youth.

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THETREVORPROJECT.ORG restorative work, to help the child’s confidence is essential.

International STAND UPto Bullying Day lands on February 28 this year. This semi-annual event encourages participants to wear a pink shirt to take a visible, public stance against bullying. The first event took place in February 2008 when over 125,000 students and staff registered to take a stand against bullying. Travis Price and David Shepherd started the event the previous year by standing up when a classmate was being bullied for wearing a pink shirt. They bought 50 pink shirts and emailed their classmates to get and wear pink shirts the following day, creating a “sea of pink”in solidarity with the student who was bullied. International STAND UP to Bullying Day has been observed the last Friday in February ever since. Searching for resources on bullying and cyberbullying?

Check out these resources:

CYBERBULLYING.ORG

THe Trevor Project, founded in 1998 by the creators of the Academy Award-winning short film TREVOR, is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to LGBTQ young people under 25. The organization offers accredited lifesaving, life-affirming programs, and services to LGBTQ youth. Through their research they partner with research organizations to carry out complex investigations that range from program evaluations to interventions and monitor, analyze, and evaluate existing data collected from the Trevor-served youth to produce insights into vulnerable populations as well as suicidal risk factors, and social factors influencing suicidal attempts. If you or someone you know about is thinking about suicide and in need of immediate support the TrevorLifeline is available at 1-866-488-7386. They also offer TrevorChat, a confidential online instant messaging system, and TrevorText, a confidential text messaging system, just text START to 678678.

■

The Cyberbullying Research Center is dedicated to providing current information about the nature, extent, causes, and consequences of cyberbullying among adolescents. The Research Center is directed by Dr. Sameer Hinduja from Florida Atlantic University and Dr. Justin W. Patchin from University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, who have been studying cyberbullying since 2002. They founded the Center in order to bring research about cyberbullying to those who can benefit most from it.

Their website includes a Safety Glossary, Tips for Teens, Live Streaming: Top Ten Tips for Teens, a parent guide to Teen Sexting, insight into state by state bullying laws, tips for preventing cyberbullying, presentations, books, and more.

GLSEN.ORG GLSEN, founded by a group of teachers in 1990, believes that “every student has the right to a safe, supportive, and LGBTQ-inclusive K-12 education”. Their organization, a national network of educators, students, and local GLSEN Chapters work to make this right a reality. Their research and experience has shown there are four major ways schools can cultivate a safe and supportive environment for all students, METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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GIVING UP THE GHOST

psychologist and founder of the Gay Therapy Center which has a network of 36 licensed therapists who identify as LGBTQ based in Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco and Washington D.C. Blum transitioned from private practice to a multi-city franchise four years ago because he saw the need for clinical psychologists who were uniquely qualified to address the needs and issues affecting LGBTQ clients.

BODY

HEALTH

MOST OF US DON’T NEED A DICTIONARY TO KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO BE “GHOSTED.” The visceral pain of being “ghosted” is less easily defined and quantified. It’s a double-edged knife (whether you’re the ghost and the ghostee), often encompassing a potent mix of guilt, regret and shame. In order to unpack it, I reached out to Adam Blum, clinical

While dating apps are ubiquitous across all manner of sexual orientation, they are particularly critical in the LGBTQ community because of societal factors which make it difficult to identify prospective partners and build lasting relationships. Blum concurs that ghosting is about avoidance. “It is hiding. And LGBTQ people have a lot of experience with hiding. For most of us, it was the only way to survive growing up.” Blum advocates a range of practical steps to reframe the experience and process it in a way that prioritizes self-care.

“We need to double down on our self-care. Which means to ramp up a life-long effort to learn how to love and support ourselves.”

SHORT-CIRCUIT THE SELF-BLAME Blum suggests taking a beat to acknowledge the pain and the hurt.

The reason being ghosted is so triggering is because“it pushes on our attachment system. This is a built-in system that keeps us alive as infants.”Once you’ve acknowledged the hurt, don’t wallow in it. This is the time to“pat yourself on the back” for putting yourself out there and allowing yourself to be vulnerable, because that’s where growth happens.

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TRANSITION FROM THE APP TO REAL LIFE ASAP As with that other pesky byproduct of dating (being cat-fished), the best defense against “ghosting” is transitioning to an in-person, face-to-face encounter as soon as possible. Blum acknowledges that apps are a necessary tool in our dating arsenal, but he cautions that they are predisposed toward deception. Human interactions are predominantly non-verbal. There’s no substitute for direct, one-on-one encounters because people are hardwired to pick up on nonverbal cues and you’re less likely to misread the signs.

WHEN IN DOUBT, HEED OPRAH’S ADVICE Blum suggests taking in a prospective partner’s responsiveness (or lack thereof) as “more information” about who this person is. If someone doesn’t respond to a text immediately, it doesn’t mean you’ve been ghosted. But what if you don’t hear from them for a day? Or a week?

Like Oprah often quotes her mentor, the late great Maya Angelou, “when a person shows you who they are (by their behavior), believe them the first time.” In the early stages of a relationship, this is your opportunity to gauge your comfort level and what your expectations

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PRIORITIZE SELF-CARE

EMPATHIZE WITH YOUR GHOST Blum suggests looking at it from both sides of the equation. “If we ghost people, it means we are in some way cut off from others.

When we lose our empathy, we lose part of our soul.” This helps us detach from the emotionally painful experience of being ghosted and look at the situation from a more analytical framework. Blum goes on to explore what’s going on under the surface: “Why do we hurt others? In general, it’s often because we have our own hurt that we aren’t in touch with.”

Breaking up may be hard to do, but letting go can be even harder. It’s like ripping a band-aid off. It’s less painful if you can do it quickly.

But some people have a hard time letting go. Besides the rejection, the most frustrating part of being ghosted is the lack of closure. I posed the question to Adam Blum as to whether there’s a value to

FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE LA

HOW FAR WILL HE GO? THE NOT-SO-GAY CRUSADE OF PETE BUTTIGIEG

METROSOURCE

OH SNAP!

THE INTERNATIONAL MALE DOCUMENTARY

MGM NATIONAL HARBOR THIS IS THE WAY TO WHOOPIE

For more information on Adam Blum and his team of LGBTQ psychotherapists, check out his web site at thegaytherapycenter.com where you can browse through his team of licensed psychologists in a city near you. The site also features a large collection of blogs and videos with targeted subjects affecting our community from sex addiction to parenting to navigating an open relationship, and more.

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LETTING GO AND MOVING ON

pursuing the person who’s ghosted you in an effort to gain a better understanding or closure. His response: “Generally not. Most of us obsess about this question of ‘why’ when we are dropped. Reaching out to the person typically just feeds the obsession. We need to put our resources back into our relationship with ourselves and with the people who treat us with respect and kindness.” So when is it time to let it go?” Blum: Quicker than you want to. Most people waste time hoping that someone who is unkind to us will become kind to us. That rarely happens.” In the words of Ariana Grande: “Thank you, next.”

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THE RETURN OF DRUMMER MAGAZINE

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THE WAY TO WHOOPEE SOON AFTER WE ARRIVED IN THE MASSIVE SUNLIT CONSERVATORY AT MGM NATIONAL HARBOR, WE BEGAN TO NOTICE THE YOUNG MEN. GROUPS OF THREE AND FOUR STRIDING THROUGH THE TWO-STORY ATRIUM, ASCENDING THE GRAND STAIRCASE, RIDING THE ESCALATOR. SCORES OF WELL-GROOMED YOUNG MEN ENTERING THE LOBBY BENEATH THE 85-FOOT-HIGH GLASS CEILING. SPITPOLISHED YOUTH IN UNIFORM WALKING WITH PURPOSE, ONE OF WHOM EXPLAINED TO US, “IT’S THE MARINE CORPS BIRTHDAY BALL.” BY MARK A. THOMPSON

Potomac Plaza at MGM National Harbor

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MGM National Harbor Aerial Spring Exterior

WELL, THEN, AND HOW FORTUITOUS FOR US TO ARRIVE AT NATIONAL HARBOR on the weekend of such an auspicious

occasion. How very fine to be surrounded by such model military youth along the banks of the Potomac a few minutes south of D.C. In the eleven years since its opening in 2008, National Harbor has become a year-round destination attracting more than 12 million annual visitors to a vibrant waterfront community in Prince George’s County, Maryland. Notable for its iconic 180-foot observation wheel known as Capital Wheel and a riverfront Carousel, the 350-acre, $4-billion mixed-use development offers an array of maritime activities, including water taxi service to and from Old Town Alexandria, District Wharf, and Georgetown. In addition to National Harbor’s seven hotels with 3,300 rooms, visitors and residents mix and mingle at more than 30 restaurants and 160 retailers.

All very nice for a town of less than 4,000 residents— but what really upped the ante for this arts-focused community was the opening in December 2016 of the $1.4 billion MGM National Harbor and its 3,000-seat theater. Architecturally inspired by the Washington Monument visible on the horizon, the 24-story luxury casino offers a 308-room hotel with 74 suites—and more than 3,100 slot machines and 200 table games. In short, MGM National Harbor is Maryland’s largest and highest-earning casino: a taste of Vegas on the Potomac with a star-studded roster of entertainers that include gay favorites such as Cher, Mariah, Britney, Idina, Christina Aguilera, Ricky Martin, Sarah Silverman—and Michael METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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Carbonaro during our visit, which made us wonder how many Marines might extend their birthday ball celebrations to attend Carbonaro’s show.

For those guests who wish to entertain newfound uniformed friends, the Executive Corner Suites at MGM National Harbor are perfect for hosting intimate cocktail parties. Larger than many Manhattan apartments, the 1,465-square-foot suites offer panoramic views from the floor-to-ceiling windows that frame the corner apartments. Guests are greeted in a spacious living area with an integrated entertainment center and executive console. A king-sized bedroom is flanked by a private seating area with views of D.C. landmarks. The expansive bathroom features a powder room with backlit vanity table, as well as water closet and a double rainforest shower large enough to serve as a yoga studio—or for water sports.

Located on a private deck with landscaped flower beds, the hotel’s adult-only pool is maintained at 84 degrees throughout the summer season—and when the cooler weather arrives, there’s rest and relaxation to be found at The Spa at MGM National Harbor, a 27,000-square-foot sanctuary that includes The Men’s Wet Room, a private male-only oasis.

While several of the resort’s various restaurants celebrate Maryland’s maritime bounty, Fish by José Andrés takes pride of place with a spectacular nautical setting overlooking the Potomac that offers some of the best of the Michelin-starred chef’s signature seafood specialties.

For a restorative brunch after a late night at the tables, head over to the waterfront district and into the award-winning Succotash, where the James-Beard-nominated chef Edward Lee blends Southern soul food with his own Korean culinary heritage for the best of both worlds. Nota bene: skillet cornbread with sorghum butter and fried green tomatoes with buttermilk dressing. Oh, and also: chocolate bourbon pecan pie.

How better to work off such finger-licking gluttony—and let’s not forget that we’re talking about the South here, where butter and bacon are the backbones of home cooking—than with a round of retail therapy? Designated as The District, the luxury shopping corridor at MGM National Harbor includes the first outpost of Sarah Jessica Parker’s SJP Collection of high heels, stilettos, and handbags. Be forewarned: the SATC actress has been known to work the floor at the store to help customers shop each season’s new collection. Equally tempting for the sartorially savvy male is the haberdasher Stitched, a brilliantly-curated collection of bespoke clothing and accessories housed in a space evocative

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MGM National Harbor Chairmans Suite

MGM National Harbor Casino

of a London gentlemen’s club. There’s also the Cinderella Shoe, a gigantic seven-foot-tall stiletto made entirely of stainless steel. Created by artist Liao Yibai, the high-heeled shoe fits every selfie fetish.

For gamblers in need of a good deal, Tanger Outlets is a short walk from the front entrance of MGM National Harbor. Built on the grounds that once housed Salubria, a 40-acre antebellum plantation, the outdoor mall features a memorial garden and history walk near the Potomac River Heritage Visitors Center, thereby enabling a dose of American history alongside consumerism. With more than 85 outlet stores, it’s possible to shop until sunset—and then return to the waterfront for a dinner cruise and fireworks.

National Harbor’s two 700-foot piers provide access to kayaks, paddleboards, pedal boats, water taxis, and yacht rentals at the 62-boat marina, as well as the outdoor bar and lounge known as Flight Deck.

Each year, the Capital Wheel attracts nearly one million passengers for a spectacular ride within the observation wheel’s 42 climate-controlled gondolas. In the summer months, the waterfront offers outdoor fitness classes, concert series, and movie nights.

Though MGM National Harbor is located less than ten miles from Capitol Hill, there’s often a sense of living high above the fray in a world designed for entertainment and escape. Sometimes what you need most is the fantasy of escape—and especially when surrounded by a corps of Marines.

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PHOTOS THIS PAGES 46-48 COURTESY MGM NATIONAL HARBOR HOTEL

MGM National Harbor Fish

Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tampa

THE ROAD TO ROCK SOME PEOPLE HAVE ALL THE LUCK—BUT OTHERS MAKE THEIR OWN.

BY MARK A. THOMPSON THE LAST TIME I’D WON ANYTHING WAS AN APPLE PIE for predicting the most

Oscar winners. Therefore, I took my seat at the blackjack table with a certain amount of trepidation. Furthermore, this table was in the private high-rollers room at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Tampa, one of the largest casinos in the States.

Fortunately for guests at the recently-expanded resort, Elvis Presley’s 24-karat gold-leaf piano has pride of place in the brand-new atrium entrance where gamblers are greeted by a Presley quotation unfurling like a banner overhead:“I just can’t miss with a good luck charm like you.”

Repeat three times and click your red shoes—and then listen carefully as the blackjack dealer and the pit boss explain the rules for the blackjack tournament.

If you grew up as I did in a cutthroat card-playing family where your grandmother would think nothing of bagging your entire allowance, then you’ll feel right at home at the tables for a private blackjack lesson at Seminole Hard Rock. As the sixth-largest casino in the world, the resort offers more than 5,000 slot machines and nearly 200 table games. Atop

the new 14-story tower, VIP guests access a private gaming parlor with private elevators and personalized check-in.

Being seated at a hundred-dollar minimum table filled me as much dread as exhilaration—that is, until I envisioned my card-playing grandmother. As Frank Sinatra sang,“Luck be a lady tonight”—and if you pay careful attention to the dealer and the cards, then you might walk away as I did with much more than an apple pie.

Funny how a little luck makes you feel like living the high life. Good karma is a boomerang and at Seminole Hard Rock, there’s plenty of opportunity for sharing the wealth. The property’s recent $800 million expansion has resulted in a full-service resort notable for a three-pool wellness retreat complete with private VIP pool and cabana garden, complemented by al fresco dining at Pool Bar & Grill.

As any Hard Rock guest will attest, music is Hard Rock’s blood—and Seminole Hard Rock showcases more than 500 pieces of musical memorabilia throughout the resort. Apart from Elvis’s golden piano, there’s also Lady Gaga’s crystal-encrusted Super Bowl jacket, as well as garments METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

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belonging to nearly every LGBTQ+ icon from Janis Joplin to Beyoncé. In keeping with Hard Rock’s focus on musical entertainment, the resort’s brand-new, 1,500-seat Hard Rock Event Center includes a ballroom for concerts and private events.

Hard Rock guests who wish to host their own concerts are urged to do so in their suites and rooms. The resort’s Sound of Your Stay in-room music amenity program offers Fender guitars (such as Stratocasters, Telecasters, and bass guitars) along with Fender Mustang floor amp and headphones (to ensure zero noise complaints from fellow guests). Complimentary vinyl records and Crosley turntables are also available, as are curated music playlists compiled by Hard Rock’s team of music experts.

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Lady Gaga Super Bowl jacket at Hard Rock Tampa

Hard Rock Tampa’s brand-new, 14-story tower houses nearly 600 spacious rooms with 77 new suites, all of which feature 42-inch entertainment centers alongside banquette seating and in-room kitchenette with coffee machine. Floor-to-ceiling windows face onto the pool complex with panoramic city views of the Tampa Bay metropolitan area. For those who prefer singing in the shower, the spa bathrooms offer walk-in rainforest showers with built-in marble benches—for private audiences.

Given the resort’s 24/7 vibe, in-room dining is available around the clock—but it’s equally tempting to use your winnings at Council Oak Steaks & Seafood. As popular with Tampa Bay locals as it is with Hard Rock guests, the award-winning destination restaurant serves U.S.D.A. prime steaks dry-aged for 28 days and cut to order from the on-site butcher shop. Steaks and local seafood are complemented by a superlative wine cellar—and few desserts are more crowd-pleasing than the fabled 151 Volcano, flambéed tableside. Equally indulgent, The Rez Grill offers handcrafted cocktails that tap into every guest’s inner child, such as cocktails masquerading as sippy cups.

For those guests in need of a rock-n-roll makeover, the resort’s glistening new Rock Spa & Salon provides a sanctuary for well-being and transformation. Hard Rock’s signature Rock Om yoga program enables guests to practice in the privacy of their own suites and rooms—without the stress of yoga wear competition.

In recent years, the greater Tampa Bay metropolitan area has become one of the region’s more alluring LGBTQ+ destinations, thanks to various annual events such as Tampa Pride and the Tampa Pride Diversity Festival, both of which are held at the end of March. In June, the annual St. Pete

PHOTOS THIS PAGES 49-51 COURTESY HARD ROCK HOTEL & CASINO TAMPA

East Tower Luxury Suite

Barber Shop at Hard Rock Tampa

Pride weekend features the only night parade in Florida—and, in nearby Sarasota, the annual Harvey Milk Festival is a non-profit music and arts festival honoring the legacy of Harvey Milk.

Cigar aficionados know that Tampa proudly wears the sobriquet“Cigar City,”thanks to the historic neighborhood of Ybor City, which was populated in the 1890s by thousands of Cuban immigrants. A cigar factory tour at Tabanero Cigars features dexterous Cuban artisans rolling handmade cigars in the heart of Ybor City.

Nestled within the neighborhood, GaYBOR is immediately recognizable by the rainbow flags and GayYBOR signs along 8th Avenue and 15th Street—and the boys at Hamburger Mary’s. The annual GaYBOR Days in July attracts thousands of LGBTQ+ people and their friends and family for a jubilant street party.

Adjacent to the eight-acre Hard Rock campus on the Florida State Fairgrounds, the MIDFLORIDA Amphitheatre is Tampa Bay’s largest concert-only facility with a 20,000-person capacity.

Originally opened for The Cure’s Curiosa Festival in 2004, the venue hosts various music festivals, thereby enabling Hard Rock guests an opportunity to witness musical events both on- and off-property.

Regardless of where you wander throughout Seminole Hard Rock Tampa, what becomes increasingly clear is how well the resort and the greater Tampa Bay area honor the Hard Rock tagline Love All Serve All. It’s enough to make you feel lucky all over again. Light a cigar and place a bet: you just can’t miss with a good luck charm like that.

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Pool Deck Overview

The Rez Grill

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HOME

Everything you need to host a cocktail party in style.

BY DEBORAH L. MARTIN

WHETHER YOU ASPIRE TO A RAKISH NICK AND NORA CHARLES-TYPE GATHERING, or your tastes run more towards an evening of board games and artisanal cheese boards, planning a party can be stressful, unless you have the correct tools. But with some advance planning, even a small apartment can shine as the setting for an intimate gathering or a boisterous event. The most important accessory is, of course, a savvy host and fun guests, but it can also help to invest in some items to make your entertaining life more chic.

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THIS PAGE: PLUM COCKTAIL PORTRAIT PHOTO COURTESY OF TOM DIXON

NEW YORK

LET US ENTERTAIN YOU

THIS PAGE: SPEAKE ASY MONACO PHOTO COURTESY OF TIMOTHY OULTON • TANK COPPER WHISKY DECANTER - TIMOTHY OULTON • BAR TOOL SET - MGBW BAR TOOLS • PLUM MOSCOW MULE - TIMOTHY OULTON • TANK COPPER WATER SET - TIMOTHY OULTON

While not everyone’s home is a perfect backdrop for a soigné soirée, you can maximize your space and make it perfect, or at least more convenient, to host your friends. Even in a small space, you can host a fabulous get-together, with a little forethought and some en pointe accessories.

The primary rule of making your home party-ready? Declutter. Get rid of anything that is taking up space, and liable to be in the way. Stacks of magazines, electronic cords and chargers… the things lying around that are part of everyday life have no place at a party. Removing them is half the battle.

Since the focal point of any party is of course, the people, you can throw out the traditional decorating “rules.” Place small side tables and chairs where people can gather, even if it means placing them in front of the TV, or a window. Pull in a chair or two from other rooms if you need more seating, with an eye towards creating smaller conversation areas.

At a cocktail party, guests tend to move around, chatting and forming fluid groups, but sometimes it’s nice to have a place to sit down. Ottomans, throw pillows, mismatched chairs--all are welcome at the party.

But don’t overfill your space. You want mingling and wandering, not a campfire circle.

You will need places throughout your party space for food and drink service. Wheeled bar carts or drink cabinets can be just the ticket, and can add a touch of elegance to the room. They also function when you aren’t entertaining. A bar cart can double as a side table, console, or nightstand, and a drinks cabinet is a great place to store glassware and bottles. If you don’t want to invest in a specific piece of furniture, convert a sideboard, dining room table, or bedroom dresser into a bar for the evening, but be sure to protect the surface first.

Of course, no drink station is complete without beautiful glassware and cocktail mixing tools. The new rule is there are no rules when it comes to what to serve and how to serve it. Highballs and lowballs are always in style, and double as water or punch glasses. A standard sized wine glass can be fine for both red and white, and can also be used for water or colorful mixed drinks. The point of any party is to have fun, not to stress over the perfect style of glass. Find something you love and use it with confidence. You be you!

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LIVIN’ LA VIDA

VEGAN!

One festive, plant-based eatery is teaching Manhattan diners how to embrace a diet that’s better for themselves, and the planet.

BY MEGAN VENZIN

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accented interiors of Jajaja Plantas Mexicanas evoke sunny, south of the border feels. From the piled high nachos that drip with crema, fermented black beans and housemade chorizo to the smokey, mezcallaced cocktails, the new West Village location has all the trappings of a traditional Mexican cantina… everything that is, except the meat.

Because at Jajaja the chorizo isn’t quite chorizo… even though it looks and tastes a hell of a lot like the crumbly, go-to cure for a wicked Sunday hangover.

Executive Chef Ricky Huitzil, who is originally from Puebla, Mexico, crafts the cured“sausage”from an organic, wheat-based alternative called seitan, which perfectly mimics the familiar texture and flavor of the popular ingredient. And there’s no dairy to be found in that crema either. It is actually a light, silky sauce made from cashews. The entire menu is packed with mouthwatering inspo that makes the tongue sing. Tofu skin (also known as yuba) is marinated for hours before being transformed into a spicy, hearty version of beef-free barbacoa. The finely shredded carnitas which get tucked inside savory entrees like enchiladas verdes and panseared gorditas are another culinary magic act - they so closely resemble their pork-based counterpart, that even a pro-palate might fail to recognize their jackfruit origins. Slow-cooked with spices the carnitas bear a salty, fatty flavor that could satisfy even the most discerning carnivore.

In case you hadn’t guessed, everything at Jajaja is 100% plant-based, which means anyone with a goal to go vegan can make good with this menu. And that’s the point. After noticing a serious lack of quality vegan dining experiences in New York, owners Koorosh Bakhtiar and Nima Garos of Raise Hospitality launched their first location of JaJaJa in the Lower East Side in 2017. Their goal? To deliver to an unpretentious plantbased menu with a big focus on flavor, not faux or synthetic products. Three openings later, the inventive duo are still turning skeptics into believers.

“In general, maintaining a plant-based diet is overall better for yourself and the planet,” says General Manager, Fee Bakhtiar. “We use less energy when we prepare dishes with plants over meat-based products, and it digests better. Also, at JaJaJa, we like to incorporate this philosophy throughout the space by showing guests how it’s easy to maintain, and delicious.”

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For many, the thought of eliminating all animal products from their diet can be a source of intimidation. However, maintaining a plant-based lifestyle, or one that limits the intake of meat, can be achieved by finding fun ways to turn accessible ingredients into healthier, meatless dopplegangers. “Little changes make it easier to transition,” Bahkiar explains.“Some examples might be changing from cow’s milk to almond, or looking up plant-based cheeses or mayo as substitutions. Incorporating more fulfilling

and satisfying vegetables into your diet helps too. Lentils and legumes are more filling so you won’t feel like you’re missing out on heavier foods.” (This might explain why pillowy green peas are present in JaJaJa’s zesty guacamole - a nutritionally dense ingredient that adds bulk without detracting from the beautiful simplicity of the classic dip.)

Thankfully, the menu at JaJaJa Plantas Mexicanas is home to a slew of flavorful alternatives that anyone can replicate at home with standard kitchen tools. But if you are in the New York area, we of course recommend that you flock to the Latin hotspot.

And while you’re there, try everything.

IN NYC? VISIT JAJAJA PLANTAS MEXICANAS! Jajaja West Village 63 Carmine Street, New York, NY, 10014 +1 (917) 262-0184 Mon-Sun 11:00am–12:00am Jajaja Lower East Side 162 E Broadway, New York, NY, 10002 +1 (646) 883-5453 Sun-Wed 11:00am–12:00am Thu-Sat 11:00am–1:00am Jajaja Brooklyn (inside North 3rd Street Market) 103 N 3rd Street, Brooklyn, NY, 11249 +1 (860) 479-2872 Sun-Sat 11:00am–9:00pm

PHOTOS COURTESY OF THE SOCIAL CLUB

BODY

HEALTH

EVEN ON A SNOWY NIGHT IN NEW YORK CITY, the turquoise and pink-

Here we offer some meatless weekday meal suggestions, inspired by the amazing eats at Jajaja Plantas Mexicanas.

JACKFRUIT CARNITAS

AVOCADO SOPA (RAW)

Ingredients: Canned jackfruit (in brine), yellow onion, fresh garlic, fresh jalapeno peppers, tamari soy sauce, red wine vinegar, juice of orange, juice of lime, liquid smoke, olive oil Spice blend: (½ tablespoon of the following) salt, cumin, chipotle or ancho chili powder, smoked paprika, dried oregano, nutritional yeast, and (¼ teaspoon) ground black pepper Instructions: Chop one yellow onion, five fresh garlic cloves and two jalapeno peppers.

Add one tablespoon of olive oil to saucepan and add veggies. Cook until onions appear translucent. Open two 20 oz cans of jackfruit, drain excess liquid and blot fruit with paper towels. Add jackfruit to pan and allow it to cook and dehydrate (about five minutes).

Next, add most of your spice blend to the jackfruit and continue to cook in the pan (you can leave some aside and add to taste later).

Stir and cook for about one minute and then add one tablespoon of red wine vinegar, about three tablespoons of tamari soy sauce, juice of one orange, one teaspoon of liquid smoke and simmer until liquid is mostly absorbed (between 15 and 20 minutes). Spritz with fresh lime and serve over rice, on chips or inside tortillas as tacos/enchiladas.

Ingredients: avocado, cucumber, carrot juice, cilantro, juice of lemon, salt, pepper, sunflower seeds, olive oil Crema: raw cashews, filtered water, rice vinegar, white miso, nutritional yeast, salt, pepper Instructions: to make cashew crema, soak one cup of raw cashews overnight in filtered water until it is mostly absorbed (leave a little in the mix). Add one tablespoon of rice vinegar, half a juice of lemon, one tsp of white miso, one tablespoon of nutritional yeast and salt and pepper. Blend in a food processor. For a thinner sauce add 1/8 cup of non-dairy milk (cashew or almond) For soup, peel one cucumber and cut lengthwise. Remove seeds with a spoon. Chop cucumber and add to blender. Cut avocado in half, remove pit and scoop into blender. Clean and add chopped cilantro (to taste). Add three cups of fresh squeezed carrot juice, half juice of lemon. Blend until smooth and add salt and pepper to taste. Drizzle with crema and olive oil, then add sunflower seeds on top for a crunch

SWEET POTATO TACOS

HEARTS OF PALM CEVICHE

Ingredients: corn tortillas, olive oil, salt, pepper, sweet potato, black beans, chopped red peppers, fresh cilantro, and any salsa verde you would like (Jajaja’s is avocado based). Optional: chipotle powder Instructions: Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

While the oven is heating, wash all produce.

Peel and dice one large sweet potato and place in bowl. Drizzle one teaspoon of olive oil over potatoes and dust with salt and pepper (for a little extra heat, add a dash of chipotle powder). Toss in bowl until coated, and then place on a sheet pan in one even layer and put inside oven. While potatoes are roasting (about 20 minutes or until tender), open one can of black beans and heat in a saucepan on low on the stovetop. When potatoes are roasted through and beans are warmed, lay two corn tortillas flat on a plate and fill with the hot ingredients. Top the tacos with fresh cilantro, finely chopped red peppers and salsa verde.

Ingredients: Canned hearts of palm, red peppers, cilantro, juice of a lime, chopped cherry tomatoes, roasted seaweed, avocado, fresh radish, salt, pepper, tortilla or plantain chips Instructions: finely chop red peppers, cilantro and cherry tomatoes, and add to bowl. Open one can of hearts of palm and drain excess liquid. Rough chop hearts of palm and add to bowl with other ingredients. Next open roasted seaweed and cut into fine slivers. Add to bowl. Squeeze half of a lime over top of all ingredients and mix with a spoon.

Add salt and pepper to taste. Top with sliced avocados and radishes and serve with tortilla or plantain chips.

SIMPLE STORE BOUGHT PLANT-BASED SUBSTITUTIONS

Sometimes we don’t have time to make our meals from scratch, and that’s OKAY. You can still achieve marvelous, meatless versions of your favorite foods with items you can find in your local grocery store. Here are some of our favorite go-tos: STANDARD Cheddar cheese Mayonnaise Butter Flour tortillas Sour Cream Eggs Ground Beef

PLANT-BASED ALTERNATIVE Try: Violife Violife Foods brand Just Like Cheddar Shreds Try: Follow Your Heart brand Vegenaise Try: Miyoko’s Creamery brand European Cultured Vegan Butter Try: The Real Coconut brand Coconut Flour Tortillas Try: Follow Your Heart brand Dairy-Free Sourcream Try: Hampton Creek brand JUST Vegan Egg Try: Beyond Meat brand Fiesta Crumbles

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READING FOR WELLNESS: A BOOK ROUND UP FOR 2020

BY JEFFREY JAMES KEYES

BODY

HEALTH

The Athlete’s Guide to CBD: Treat Pain and Inflammation, Maximize Recovery, and Sleep Better Naturally by Scott Douglas Rodale Books $15.99 Scott Douglas is a contributing writer for Runner’s World and the author of several books including 26 Marathons and Running is My Therapy. He uncovers what makes CBD “the holy grail” product for athletes and active people through this comprehensive guide of the ways athletes can benefit from using CBD products. Former NFL Pro Bowl Player Tiki Barber sets the scene with a dynamic foreword about the stigma and healing properties of CBD. Douglas shows that this book can be for everyone from the start, stating “Don’t let the word athlete in this book’s title intimidate you.

Athletes aren’t just those in professional or school sports. Athletes are people who work out with a purpose...if you exercise regularly and care about your workouts, you’re an athlete.” He started incorporating CBD into his routine in 2018 and has since found his sleep improves as well as his recovery from training and injury. In his book, The Athlete’s Guide to CBD, the reader is alleviated of the stigma behind CBD and given permission to smartly explore the world of CBD with a healthy background of terminology, a buyer’s checklist, and plenty of information. One of the most interesting parts of the book is the “small sampling of athlete’s successes with CBD” including accounts by major and everyday athletes as well as his own firsthand account.

Bright Line Eating: The Science of Living Happy, Thin, and Free

by Susan Peirce Thompson, Ph.D. Hay House $25.99 Don’t ask “how can I lose weight?” instead ask “how can I lose weight in 2020”. Susan Peirce Thompson, who states in her powerful book Bright Line Eating poses the argument that “over the past century or so, there’s been a shift in how our bodies and brains react to food.

As a consequence, as a species we are getting fatter, and no amount of education or effort seems to be helping,” adding that roughly 2 billion people worldwide are now overweight, and 600 million of them are obese. This statistic comes from The U.S. Weight Loss and Diet Control Market. Thompson goes on point out that “we don’t have an obesity problem. We have an obesity mystery.” Her Bright Line Eating program sets out to solve that mystery.

Thompson is an Adjunct Associate Professor of Brain and Cognitive Sciences at the University of Rochester, President of the Institute for Sustainable Weight Loss, and founder and CEO of Bright Line Eating Solutions. At the top of her book Thompson shares her personal story

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THIS PAGE: THE ATHLETE’S GUIDE TO CBD IMAGE COURTESY OF RODALE BOOKS • BRIGHT LINE EATING IMAGE COURTESY OF HAY HOUSE

IS 2020 THE YEAR YOU’RE FINALLY GOING TO TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR HEALTH (AND YOUR LIFE)?

The past year has introduced a wide range of health and wellness books to the market. We are paying special attention to the popularity of cannabis and CBD and found two great books to add to your healthy library as well as a few new and trusted philosophies behind weight loss and weight management including the popular Bright Line Eating and a new title by Dr. Mike Dow and a revisit to the DASH program. Get healthy this year, you have our permission.

THIS PAGE: DASH FOR WEIGHT LOSS IMAGE COURTESY OF HARMONY BOOKS • THE SUGAR BRAIN FIX IMAGE COURTESY OF HAY HOUSE

before getting into all of the science one might need to understand what is happening inside the brain to prevent weight loss, and how the Standard American Diet doesn’t work. Part II of the book explains how Bright Line Eating can solve those problems by essentially rewiring the brain to work with goals (we won’t spoil anything, you’ve got to see for yourself!). Part III provides a Bright Line Eating Food Plan with powerful case studies and success stories.

Parts IV and V are all about empowering, with useful tools that make long-term weight loss attainable and sustainable. The book ends with some really great resources including a sample nightly checklist sheet and action plan to send readers off in the right direction.

DASH for Weight Loss: An Easy-to-Follow Plan for Losing Weight, Increasing Energy, and Lowering Blood Pressure

by Jennifer Koslo, PhD, RDN, LDN, CPT Harmony Books $22.00 Need to cut back? DASH (Dietary Approaches to Stop Hypertension) is a simple program rooted in proven science that has the added benefits of improving overall health, boosting metabolism, and helping people lose unwanted pounds. The DASH eating plan ultimately encourages you to reduce the amount of sodium in your diet while increasing daily servings of nutrient-rich foods while focusing on three minerals that can help to lower blood pressure: calcium, magnesium, and potassium. Dr. Koslo’s book features three parts covering the basics as well as the science behind the DASH diet, how to set you up for success by making the kitchen DASH-friendly, four weeks of DASH menus and fitness schedules as well as tasty recipes for every meal. The book is filled with useful tips for weight loss including notes about weight-loss myths, goals, snacking, recommended daily servings, and more. The recipe section, which ultimately covers ¾ of the book and features useful (and delicious) recipes paired with colorful images of bites and flavorful meals like Raspberry Mango Turmeric Overnight Oats, High-Protein Apple Carrot Hemp Muffins, Barley and Roasted Brussels Sprouts with Fresh Herbs and Ricotta, Creamy Cauliflower Butternut Squash Mac and Cheese, Slow Cooker Pineapple Chicken, Cheesy Baked Kale Chips, Peanut Butter Blondies, and Pumpkin Pie Snack Bars. Sounds appetizing? Be sure to stock up at the grocery store before, during, and after reading.

The Sugar Brain Fix: The 28-Day Plan to Quit Craving the Foods That Are Shrinking Your Brain and Expanding Your Waistline

by Dr. Mike Dow Hay House $26.99 What makes a healthy brain? Highly sought-after psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author Dr. Mike Dow is back with The Sugar Brain Fix, sharing a simple, yet powerful plan to help readers kick their food addictions. Dr. Mike Dow’s other books include The Brain Fog Fix, Healing the Broken Brain, and Diet Rehab.

Inspired by his brother who suffered a massive stroke when he was just ten years old, Dr. Mike made it his personal mission to help others in their quest for health and happiness. In Diet Rehab, Dr. Mike Dow introduced his plan, over the past five years he’s gathered more data to show how our standard American diet is harming our brains and bodies. Through The Sugar Brain Fix, Dr. Dow takes a closer look at

how sugar affects brain chemistry and the ways we can fix it. Part I takes readers through understanding “sugar brain”, including how food addiction fuels sugar brain - and vice versa, fully getting into the secret of gradual detox. Part II pulls the curtain back on the “Western Diet” providing a deeper look at why people feel anxious, blue, or powerless. In Part III Dr. Mike Dow rolls up his sleeves and gets into obsessive eating, emotional eating, and binge eating finally sharing his tips for “Fixing Your Sugar Brain” in Part IV, ending with supplements, foods, and practices as well as some fantastic recipes that will help to prevent you from looking back at that codependent relationship you might have with sugar.

Get the care you deserve from the people who celebrate the true you. Our free/low-cost Medicaid health insurance gives you access to: A large network of doctors, hospitals, pharmacies, dentists, and more Treatment and preventive care for a safe, healthy sex life, including PrEP and ARVs Health advocates to help you every step of the way Help with housing referrals, job training, and other support programs

Medicaid Health Plan

Welcome to the health plan where you can

BE YOURSELF CONTACT US FOR CONFIDENTIAL ANSWERS:

1-855-GO-AMIDA (1-855-462-6432), TTY 711 • www.AmidaCareNY.org Stock photo with models.

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EXPRESS YOURSELF

Sophisticated Art and Entertainment from Top Secret Soirées to Burlesque. BY MEGAN VENZIN NEW YORK MEN’S FASHION WEEK (FALL/WINTER 2020) February 2nd - 4th Spring Studios (50 Varick Street) and other locations Bump elbows with the world’s most in-demand designers, models and buyers during New York Fashion Week. There’s no better time or place to get the skinny on this season’s hottest looks, and from February 2nd through 4th, the city’s chicest studs can expect to find several official fashion shows geared specifically toward men’s styles. Dress savvy and come see what all the fuss is about. For more information and a full list of events visit: nyfw.com

OTHER POINTS OF VIEW Opens February 8th Leslie Lohman Museum of Gay and Lesbian Art If you haven’t heard of names like Eugene Berman, Morris Hirshfield and Esteban Francés, you’re not alone. Though these artists played a pivotal role in shaping America’s modern art movement between World War I and II,

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they faded into obscurity shortly after. This exhibit reintroduces them to today’s audiences in an exploration of work connected to the culturally groundbreaking magazine known as View which saw its heyday in the 1940s under editors Charles Henri Ford and Parker Tyler. leslielohman.org/project/other-points-of-view

MASQ February 8th The Williamsburg Hotel Hosted by The Center’s Young Leaders, MASQ offers New Yorker’s an evening of sophisticated art and entertainment inspired by the 80s icons who embodied the notion of“express yourself”.

Don upscale attire and your most mysterious mask at this intriguing, time machine of a fundraiser whose proceeds will go to benefit The Center’s crucial programs and services. gaycenter.org/masq/

COUNTRYSIDE, THE FUTURE Opens February 20th The Solomun R. Guggenheim Museum Powered by original research from names like Rem Koolhaus and Samir Bantal of the Office

Anna S

ui Portra

it by M

iguel Flo

res-Vian

na

for Metropolitan Architecture, Countryside, The Future shows how the landscape of our planet is being transformed by factors like climate change, organic coexistence, migration, largescale planning and more. This informative installation will inhabit an entire rotunda and address today’s most pressing environmental, political and socio-economic issues. guggenheim. org/exhibitions

THE WORLD OF ANNA SUI Through February 23rd Museum of Arts and Design (MAD) Detroit-born designer Anna Sui reinvented popular fashion in the early 90s. Her colorful palettes and pop-leaning looks were driven by the art, history and cultural movements that in some cases even predated her own existence.

It was in New York where the esteemed style maker honed her craft and invented signature looks that evoked the essence of cowgirls, grunge rockers, groovy flower children, surfers and every style in between. This stunning retrospective features approximately 100 examples of Sui’s timeless designs and offers a rare look into the wild imagination of one of the

THIS PAGE: MASQ 2020 IMAGE COURTESY OF THE CENTER’S YOUNG LEATDERS • ANNA SUI MAGE BY MIGUEL FLORES-VIANNA

NEW YORK

NY SCOPE

MASQ 2020

THIS PAGE: PHOTO BY DAVID MITCHELL COURTESY OF ARCADIA EARTH • TREATRE OF OPERATIONS IMAGE COURTESY OF JAMAL PENJWENY

Arcadia Earth

20th century’s most influential fashion icons. madmuseum.org/exhibition/world-anna-sui

ARCADIA EARTH: NYC EXHIBIT Through February 28th 718 Broadway, New York, NY 10008 Enter an augmented version of planet Earth at this sustainable art installation where projection mapping, VR technology, interactive environments and real-world objects are used to tell the story of our changing planet. While the high-tech elements and bright colors are sure to wow the senses, this immersive experience is especially impactful because of

the message it sends: what small steps can we take today to save the world? Learn more about the art space and Arcadia’s educational and charity partner, Oceanic Global, by visiting arcadia.earth/

THEMBOT: A NEW QUEER PARTY February 28th Stage 48 All work and no play does not compute at THEMbot, a new robot-themed dance party that’s taking over the Stage 48 mega club in Hell’s Kitchen. Short circuits and flying sparks are imminent, so grab tickets now and secure

Jamal Penjweny. Work from the series Saddam

is Here. 2010

your entry into this futuristic and“androgynous” realm. hotrabbit.com

THEATRE OF OPERATIONS: THE GULF WARS 1991 - 2011 Through March 1st MoMA Featuring more than 300 works inspired by and produced amidst the crossfire of the three decades long Gulf War, this multidisciplinary exhibition takes a look at how prolonged military engagement in Iraq sparked deep creativity in those experiencing occupancy firsthand, as well as in people responding from back home in the United States. moma.org

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PHOTOGRAPHY’S LAST CENTURY: THE ANN TENENBAUM AND THOMAS H. LEE COLLECTION Opens March 10th The Met Fifth Avenue Featuring works by modern masters such as Andy Warhol, Diane Arbus, Paul Strand, Dora Maar and others, Photography’s Last Century demonstrates just how much has been accomplished with the medium in the last 100 years. The collection shines a light on many of the artists’ early contributions to the craft and is comprised of more than 60 photographs - all of which were gifted to The Met by Ann Tenenbaum and Thomas H. Lee Collection in honor of the institution’s upcoming 150th anniversary. metmuseum.org

Iliza Shlesinger

ILIZA: THE FOREVER TOUR

NEW YORK

NY SCOPE

March 27th Beacon Theatre “Elder millennial” Iliza Shlesinger is back, and this time she’s an honest woman. That means fans can expect new jabs, new voices and new feats of physical comedy from the shining star of five Netflix stand-up specials when she brings The Forever Tour to the breathtaking Beacon Theatre this March. iliza.com/tour

t: Foxworth

The Noire Pagean

March 13th & 14th House of Yes Starring internationally renowned names like Egypt Blaque Knyle, Tutu Toussaint and host Perle Noire, The Noire Pageant is a two-night Burlesque event dedicated to showcasing POC performers. Each show is different, so guests will have endless opportunities to revel in the art of the tease and experience some jaw-dropping drag acts too!

Be sure to stick around to see who will be crowned the new King and Queen of Burlesque. houseofyes.org

SPYSCAPE: MISSIONS & MARTINIS Every Friday SPYSCAPE (928 8th Ave., New York, NY 10019) Start your weekend shaken not stirred at this top-secret soirée!Your $59 ticket grants access to dinner, one cocktail and entry into the immersive SPYSCAPE experience, including the exclusive James Bond exhibition where fans can learn more about the creative process behind the quintessential films, experiment with gadgets in Q’s lab, explore Bond’s Aston Martin DB5 and much more. Friday nights are always packed with espionage-inspired fun, so come undercover and discover for yourself why SPYSCAPE has been called “New York’s Top Ranked New Experience”. spyscape.com

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THIS PAGE: ILIZA SHLESINGER IMAGE COURTESY OF NEFLIX • THE NOIRE PAGEANT MAGE COURTESY OF HOUSE OF YES • MISSIONS & MARTINIS : UNSPLASH MAGE BY STEVE SMITH/SPYSCAPE

PERLE NOIRE PRESENTS: THE NOIRE PAGEANT

NY HOTSHOPS NEW YORK

VIRILE BARBER & SHOP VIRILE BARBER & SHOP’S NEWEST JERSEY CITY LOCATION OPENED UP IN 2018, but their cool, retro interiors tell a different story. Busy footsteps clack on the Art Deco-inspired tile floors, and the whole place smells like oak and herbs. It’s a fresh scent that will send the senses spiraling back to a simpler time - when a man could take a moment for himself after work to sip on a tumbler of small-batch bourbon and kick back for a good, old-fashioned groom sesh. And that’s exactly what customers will get at either one of Virile’s two popular north Jersey haunts, which specialize in services like shaves, beard styling and haircuts.

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PHOTOS COURTESY OF VIRILE BARBER & SHOP

A Jersey City-based barber shop has taken grooming back to the good old days.

MEGAN VENZIN

VIrile Staff

“All of our barbers are trained using the same techniques and order of operations,”explains Owner of both Jersey City shops, Andre Fersa. “We shampoo each client, perform a proper consultation, and finish the haircut with a style and a shave on the back of the neck with hot lather from vintage machines that age back to the 30s. We also have a signature method to our hot towel shaves, where it’s not uncommon for fellas to fall asleep during the process.”

Virile Barber & Shop was founded by Adam Reyes in Waldwick, NJ in 2011 out of utmost respect for the craft. “It’s the result of a passion for barbering’s rich history, and providing a service that men weren’t used to getting at the time,” Fersa shares.

“When I discovered Virile in 2012, I knew it was where I needed to be.”

Since then,Virile has expanded to four locations, with plans to open a fifth in Montclair, NJ underway.

The vibe at each is the same - a little bit old-school

hipster with a touch of rock n’ roll, as riffs from bands like The Shins or legends like David Bowie are likely to be playing over the speakers inside. Regardless of their taste in tunes, guests can always expect to be offered a drink before they take the chair - perhaps a cold beer, a hot coffee or a pour of the Shop’s signature bourbon will hit the spot?

Virile also offers their own line of craft hair products which are produced by local chemists and manufacturers not far from where the Virile story began.“The recipe is unique to Virile, and has been refined over the years,” Fersa adds.

However, the pungent pomades and quality cuts are just a couple of reasons why customers flock from across the Hudson. “When clients move from Jersey City to NYC, I assume they won’t be coming back,” Fersa says with the hint of a smile.“But most do, and I think it’s because of the relationships they’ve built with their barbers, and the consistency they’ve gotten used to at Virile.”

■

Virile Barber & Shop 510 Jersey Ave. Jersey City, NJ 07302 (201) 685-7036 Hours Mon - Fri: 10AM - 9PM Sat: 11AM - 7PM Sun: 9AM - 5PM 423 Monmouth St. Jersey City, NJ 07302 (201) 222-2200 Hours Tues - Fri: 10AM - 9PM Sat: 11AM - 7PM Closed Sun & Mon Additional locations in Waldwick and Morristown, NJ. For more info visit virilebarbershop.com

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NEW YORK

WEDDINGS

UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL WITH

JOVE MEYER

AT THE KNOT GALA 2019

BY JEFFREY JAMES KEYES

WE HAD THE GREAT FORTUNE OF ATTENDING THE KNOT GALA 2019 AT THE NEW YORK PUBLIC LIBRARY’S STEPHEN A. SCHWARZMAN BUILDING and were

able to get an up close and personal glimpse at the anticipated wedding trends for 2020, along with insight into the wedding industry with Jove Meyer, creative director and owner of Jove Meyer Events and the planner and designer of The Knot Gala 2019. The Knot is the nation’s leading multiplatform wedding resource offering a seamless, all-in-one planning experience—from finding inspiration and local vendors to creating and managing all guest experiences, wedding registries and more.

Meyer moved into wedding planning rather organically, his first job was at a balloon and a flower store in his hometown, and he worked in food service throughout college, learning as much as he could about hospitality.“In my junior year in college my best friend got engaged and asked me to help her plan her wedding, I was thrilled to help her and put all of my past experiences to use for my first wedding ever in 2008.

Jove Meyer Events was unofficially born that summer with her wedding, I loved it so much and knew I wanted to work in weddings and events.”In thinking about wedding planning, he states,“Weddings are a day when two become one and the best celebrations are those where couples pour themselves into details—big and small—at every turn. As a professional event planner and designer, I have the privilege of collaborating with couples and clients to bring their true selves and event visions to life,

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IMAGES CORUTESY OF THE WEDDING ARTISTS CO.

TRENDS FOR WEDDINGS IN 2020:

helping them thoughtfully put their own twists on conventional wedding traditions and details,” said Meyer. He adds, “For 2020 I am super excited about working with couples who want to put personalization and guest experience first for their wedding.” Couples who are excited to think through each moment of the wedding, and how we can make it personal and fantastic! I am also very excited to play with color in 2020!

2020 will be the year to shine bright and go bold with color and fun!”

To-be-weds are also putting sustainability at the forefront of their festivities through creatively upcycling décor, jewelry and attire details.

When asked how to lean into sustainability for the big day, Meyer provided some useful tips,“A few easy ways to have a more sustainable wedding can be broken down into four categories: food, decor, rentals and stationery. For food be sure to use seasonal ingredients that are local, this will cut down on unnecessary transport and travel for foods from all over the country and world. Also think about swapping out plastic straws for hay or metal ones, guests will love them, and so will the ocean!

When it comes to decor ask your florist to not use floral foam, and also offer your flowers as gifts to your guests, a local nonprofit or have them composted, giving the flowers life beyond the party. When it comes to rentals use local and stay away from plastics and paper, use what the local companies offer and what they will re-use at other events down the road. When it comes to stationery think about going digital for the save the date, invitation and or the reply cards as well. By having online reply cards, you not only help the earth, but you also save so much time as there are programs that can collect and organize all that info for you!”

In addition to sustainability and an emphasis on personalization, some additional wedding trends for 2020 include couples crafting inclusive menus and present food with interactive elements, guests serving themselves at the bar, bold lighting choices, greater statements with floral arrangements, a new take on the amenity basket, fashion that fits couples true personal attire, and wedding registries that can last a lifetime. Menus in 2020 are all encompassing and must check all boxes in 2020 - this means vegetarian, gluten-free, allergy conscious options to take dietary needs into account. Self-service drink stations are having a moment, with wall-mounted dispensers and make your own margarita bar with mix-ins for guests to serve and garnish their own drinks throughout the night. Lighting is having a dramatic moment of its own, with creative couples incorporating bold LED cocktail bar fronts, tube lighting draped on ceiling beams, decorative hanging lights “beyond the chandelier”, and even basket lights. Couples are using and exploring flowers in more clever ways, using flowers for shape and texture to elevate anything and everything including the “altar”, bar, reception tables, even food and cocktails. Gone are the days where an arrival bag with water and snacks and monogrammed mint tins at the reception are the status quo. Couples are getting even more extra with stationing magicians, tarot card readers, interactive make-your-own scent bars, and champagne stations in lounges outside of the restrooms to ensure the “party doesn’t stop, even when you leave the dance floor.”There’s a high demand for giving moments of the unexpected, or quirky throughout the wedding experience. Regarding attire, couples are encouraged to seek fashion that fits their style in 2020. This might mean unique pops of color, eccentric designers, runway trends, something to show heritage, bold choices for a new decade. With this, people are starting to rethink their registries, passing over the toaster ovens and Le Creuset (well, maybe

not the Le Creuset) for experiential ideas like honeymoon funds to fly to Croatia to see where Game of Thrones was filmed, or New Zealand to explore the landscape of Lord of the Rings.

Ideas include lifetime passes for national parks, health and ancestry screenings, and even funds for a new business opportunity. Honeymoons themselves are getting an even richer makeover, with“unplugged honeymoons”becoming a thing - with couples turning off their smartphones and simply enjoying each other’s company without the interference of work, life, social media, or anything outside of their perfect excursion away from the trials and tribulation of their day to day lives.“I am so excited to see couples become more thoughtful of the environment and causes they care about.”, said Meyer,“Couples are thinking about where their food is coming from, how it is made, what happens to it at the end of the event. They are doing the same with flowers by not using floral foam, and gifting flowers to guests, nonprofits and or back to the earth via composting. Couples are also forgoing favors and or gifts and instead asking guests to donate to causes that matter to them and make a difference in the lives of others.”

Always on the hunt for fabulous places to explore for destination weddings and honeymoons, we asked Meyer for some of his recommendations for 2020 and beyond. He

stated that, “Destination weddings are on the rise! As couples lean into full weekend experiences for their guests’ destinations tend to offer more wow and a built-in vacation alongside a celebration! While the coasts of Mexico have always been popular, I have recently fallen in love with the charming centrally located city of San Miguel de Allende. It has beautiful architecture, so much charm and character, and the food is delicious! Another fun and colorful city for a destination wedding is Palm Springs!

There is something for everyone there, and who doesn’t love a celebration in the beauty of the desert with a pool party guaranteed!

My last favorite destination for a wedding is Lake Como, surrounded by mountains and lake views at every angle it is the perfect place for guests to celebrate together, great food and wine guaranteed.” Close to home, Meyer recommends taking a closer look at The Bowery Hotel, Sound River Studio, Cedar Lakes Estate and The Foundry.

Since its inception, The Knot has inspired approximately 25 million couples to plan a wedding that’s uniquely them. However, looking at The Knot, or approaching wedding planning in general, can be daunting for a couple. “At the end of the day, a wedding is a celebration, so it’s helpful to keep that in mind when or if things get stressful.”, states Meyer, “The Knot is there to answer any and all questions

you may have, whether online or through The Knot All-In-One Wedding Planner App, which will walk you through every step of the planning process. From determining your wedding style and finding local vendors that can bring your unique wedding vision to life to creating day-of timelines and registering for everything you and your partner may need for your future lives together! The Knot Registry gives you a platform to seamlessly create and manage all of your registries—from cash funds and experiences to retail products and charities—in one place, making it easy for you to manage and even easier for your guests to gift.”

“Wedding planning should be an enjoyable and exciting experience,”adds Meyer,“although for many couples it’s their first time planning an event of this size and importance, so it can be overwhelming at times. At the end of the day, a wedding is a celebration, so it’s helpful to keep that in mind when or if things get stressful.” ■ Interested in connecting with Jove Meyer?

Visit his website at jovemeyerevents.com or find him on social media: Facebook.com/jovemeyerevents, Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram Visit The Knot online at TheKnot.com and follow on social media: Facebook.com/TheKnot and Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram.

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‘“ONE SHOULD EITHER BE A WORK OF ART OR WEAR A WORK OF ART.” - OSCAR WILDE NEW YORK CITY PHOTOGRAPHER ANDREW WERNER FOUNDED FLEUR’D PINS in 2014 in an attempt to

WEDDINGS

find a way for men to stand out at formal events. “I would photograph red carpets and black-tie galas,” says Werner, “and every man’s outfit was always the same - some variation of: black tuxedo, white shirt, black bowtie. Where was that something extra to showcase individuality?”Werner and his team started handcrafting Fleur’d Pins for his own use and people took notice. Fleur’d pins are handcrafted in New York City and as of March 2017, Fleur’d Pins have been recognized as an official “Made in NYC” business by the initiative of the Pratt Center for Community Development. The pins, which come in a wide range of style, color, and design, are a perfect fit for weddings as well as an amazing groomsman gift that can be re-worn.

Pins creator Andrew Werner wearing large red leather carnation

Yellow gold python blooming camellia pin

SAY IT WITH

A PIN

BY JEFFREY JAMES KEYES

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Fleur’d Pins bloomed out of a personal need to have that unique element of style and branding. As a photographer who covers many black-tie affairs and red carpets, I found most men’s attire to be repetitive and lackluster. It was time to reinvent an element to elevate the mundane, start a conversation, and leave an impression. Sporting a unique accessory, “a small work of art” as people often comment, captured my style in a simplistic and sophisticated way. While the lapel flower has existed for centuries as a symbol of status, prestige, and power, and I wanted to create the opportunity to make it a luxury go-to symbol for today’s market and the well-dressed. I felt it was also important to extend the experience of wearing our lapel flower beyond formal wear to everyday wear on clothing such as denim jackets, overcoats, sweaters -- enhancing a person’s daily style all the way to the altar.

HOW ABOUT WEDDINGS? Weddings are one of the most special days of a couple’s life together for creating lasting memories.

Handcrafted in New York City, our lapel flowers are the perfect complement to your story. We offer multiple silhouettes including roses, dahlias, camellias, orchids, and carnations which will leave a lasting memory you can re-wear. Extra fabric from wedding party outfits? No problem. We can customize Fleurs in almost any material to ensure everything matches perfectly.

IMAGES CORUTESY OF ANDREW WERNER

NEW YORK

ANDREW, CAN YOU SHARE A LITTLE ABOUT THE GENESIS OF FLEUR’D PINS?

Don’t settle on something that is ‘just okay’ or predictable for a groomsman gift when Fleur’d Pins are perfect to be worn with pride well beyond your special day. Every Fleur is a new age heirloom piece, making a statement for generations to come.

WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR MOST POPULAR PINS? Our silver and gold metal tones, as well as classic white, are very popular wedding accouterments all year round. For seasonal weddings, we work with couples to ensure the best pick for their palate; whether it be a midnight blue or merlot suede, fuchsia or purple leather, red or teal python. Our lapel flowers are great for the traveler and destination weddings as they are relatively small in size but high impact in nature.

WHERE CAN WE FIND FLEUR’D? For more information and to pick the perfect present for the special people in your life, shop our online storefront at FleurdPins.com, and follow us on our social media channels @FleurdPins ■

Groomsmen silver leather pin set

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RESTAURANT BITES Edited by Jeffrey James Keyes

CHELSEA THE BRESLIN

The Spotted Pig folks are behind this vintage-rustic restaurant in NoChel’s Ace Hotel. The British-inspired fare is egg-centric at breakfast and meat-and-terrine heavy for lunch and dinner, while martinis are the thing to drink at the bar. 16 W. 29th St. between Broadway & Fifth Ave., NYC 212-679-1939. www.thebreslin.com

CAFETERIA

Super-popular 24-hour dining scene offering great American fare and a trendy, heavily gay clientele. 119 Seventh Ave. at 17th St., NYC 212-414-1717. cafeteriagroup.com

ELMO

This mod restaurant, featuring comfort food with a spicy edge, takes its name from fab 40’s nightclub El Morocco. 156 Seventh Ave. between 19th and 20th Sts., NYC 212-337-8000. elmorestaurant.com

TENTH AVENUE COOKSHOP

Executive chef Marc Meyer takes American cuisine to the next level by keeping it real. Hormone-free animals, humanely raised in local farms, are used in simple but flavorful meals served amidst furnishings at once rustic and urbane. 156 Tenth Ave. at 20th St., NYC 212-924-4440. cookshopny.com

EAST VILLAGE/LOWER EAST SIDE BEAUTY & ESSEX

This eatery’s entryway is set up like a pawn shop. It leads to two sprawling levels with multiple dining rooms with a menu of shareable small plates for eclectic tastes. 146 Essex St. between Rivington and Stanton Sts., NYC 212-614-0146. beautyandessex.com

GRAMERCY PARK/FLATIRON DISTRICT GRAMERCY TAVERN

Danny Meyer’s creative American emporium never fails to please either in the formal dining room or the easier-on-the-wallet Tavern Room. 42 E. 20th St. between Broadway and Park Ave. South, NYC., 212-477-0777. gramercytavern.com

HARLEM LIDO HARLEM

Brunching in Harlem? Get into this adorable Italian hotspot in the center - with bottomless mimosa brunch, hunties - in one of the most popping gayborhoods in the city. 2168 Frederick Douglass Blvd. at 117th St., NYC 646-490-8575. lidoharlem.com

RED ROOSTER

This Harlem hot spot features regional American comfort food by Marcus Samuelsson and a casual, lively environment filled with neighborhood-centric art and artifacts. 310 Lenox Ave. between 125th and 126th Sts., NYC 212-792-9001. redroosterharlem.com

SOLOMON & KUFF RUM HALL

Harlem elites and Columbia giants mix and mingle at this delicious upscale Caribbean restaurant offering incredible rum cocktails, bites like yuca fries, and dishes like Sangria Braised Short Ribs. 2331 12th Ave. between 133rd St. & 12th Ave., NYC 212-939-9443. solomonandkuff.com

HELL’S KITCHEN AÑEJO

Find upscale, creative, beautifully prepared Mexican small plates served in a rustic setting at this hotspot with a hopping bar scene.

The cocktail selection features a variety of refined margaritas (available by the pitcher) and tequila and mezcal flights. 668 Tenth Ave. at 47th St., NYC 212-920-4770. anejonyc.com

44 & X HELL’S KITCHEN

A bit of South Beach on Tenth Avenue, this sleek haven of upscale comfort food has large and plentiful windows and a sidewalk cafe.

The perfect spot for people watching... 622 Tenth Ave. at 44th St., NYC 212-977-1170. 44andx.com

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EL CENTRO

The tiny space packs a big punch with inexpensive Mexican street food, frozen margaritas and upcycled-Corona-bottle light fixtures.

824 Ninth Ave. at 54th St., NYC 646-763-6585. elcentro-nyc.com

HELL’S KITCHEN

Hell’s Kitchen brings south-of-the-border flavor north to Ninth Avenue. Whether it’s tacos, quesadillas, or an after work margarita you crave they’ve got it. 754 9th Ave. between 50th and 51st Sts., NYC 212-977-1588. hellskitchen-nyc.com

IPPUDO WESTSIDE

Decadent Japanese bites, small plates, craveable ramen and arousing cocktails - nestled just between the theatre district and the gayborhood. 321 W. 51st St., NYC 212-974-2500. ippudony.com

PIO PIO

Guests sip pisco cocktails and craveable sangria while grazing over family-style Peruvian dishes, Chinese-Peruvian stir fries, steak, and fish below an elaborate ceiling made from thousands of tree branches intricately woven together. Pio Pio has eight locations but this one is takes the cake (Tres Leches, of course!) 604 Tenth Ave. between 43rd and 44th Sts., NYC 212-459-2929. piopio.com

VICEVERSA

ViceVersa puts a sublime spin on run-of-the-mill Italian. The atmosphere is also darn near perfect — with elegant accents and a nicely tended outdoor seating garden. 325 W. 51st St. between Eighth and Ninth Aves., NYC 212-399-9291. viceversanyc.com

WEST BANK CAFE

This elegant neighborhood fixture attracts theatergoers; Broadway and off-Broadway performers; and former and upcoming) Drag Race contestants to load up on the latest gossip while downing American eats. Be sure to check out “Showbiz Spitfire Paige Turner” and Jackie Cox whenever they perform. 407 W. 42nd St. between Ninth and Tenth Aves., NYC 212-695-6909. westbankcafe.com

HUDSON YARDS LEGACY RECORDS

At this chic, fun 85-seat restaurant brought to you by the team behind Charlie Bird and Pasquale Jones, the menu features fresh, flavorful cuisine inspired by Italy’s northern coasts. The cocktail menu is curated by mixologist Jeff Bell from P.D.T., and Arvid Rosengren is the reigning “Best Sommelier in the World.” 517 W. 38th Street between Tenth and Eleventh Aves., NYC legacyrecordsrestaurant.com

MERCADO LITTLE SPAIN

José Andrés and his team have been cooking up this love letter to Spain, which includes three restaurants, two bars, fifteen tapas kiosks, and a market on 35,000 square feet of brand new Hudson Yards real estate. 10 Hudson Yards between Tenth and Eleventh Aves., NYC 646-495-1242. littlespain.com

TAK ROOM

Thomas Keller’s Hudson Yards adventure, TAK Room takes a contemporary look on the classic Continental meal. Think throwback style, glamour, sweeping views, champagne carts, and old school New York glamour in brand new digs. 20 Hudson Yards between Tenth and Eleventh Aves., NYC 929-450-4050. takroomnyc.com

MEATPACKING DISTRICT MORIMOTO

Two floors of high-design touches (like a wall made of 17,000 Ty Nant water bottles and upholstered walls) set the scene for haute Japanese cuisine by Masaharu Morimoto. 88 Tenth Ave. between 15th and 16th Sts., NYC 212-989-8883. morimotonyc.com

STANDARD GRILL

The hip cafe just beneath the southern tip of the High Line offers a long bar in the front, a dining room with arced red-leather booths, an open kitchen, plus a sidewalk patio for entertaining Meatpacking people-watching. Surprisingly, the prices are pretty moderate throughout. 848 Washington St. between Little W. 12th and 13th Sts., NYC 212-645-4100. thestandardgrill.com

FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE.COM DECEMBER 2019/JANUARY 2020 METROSOURCE.COM

MIDTOWN/TIMES SQUARE LAMB’S CLUB

This gorgeous Theater District destination serves casual yet upscale contemporary American fare in a retro-swank supper-club environment with long red-leather banquettes, chrome torchères, head shots of movie stars and an18th-century fireplace. 132 W. 44th St. between Sixth Ave. and Broadway, NYC 212-997-5262. thelambsclub.com

NOBU 57

The David Rockwell design of celebrity chef Nobu Matsuhisa’s uptown showplace for his peerless Latin-shaded sushi is a sexy, bubbly delight. 40 W. 57th St. between Fifth and Sixth Aves., NYC 212-757-3000. noburestaurants.com/fifty-seven

SOHO/TRIBECA THE DUTCH

This multi-room eatery is sizzling with a SoHo crowd that’s half downtown scene-makers, half-foodies and all hot. Andrew Carmellini’s comfort-skewing menu features renditions of American Southern staples, international inpirations and an oyster bar. 131 Sullivan St. at Prince St., NYC 212-677-6200. thedutchnyc.com

SUSHI NAKAZAWA

Daisuke Nakazawa, the former apprentice to sushi guru Jiro Ono, created this posh West Village joint where comfortable, high back, leather chairs at the sushi bar set the scene for an impressive twentycourse dynamic tasting menu. 23 Commerce Street between Seventh Ave. and Bedford St., NYC 212-924-2212. sushinakazawa.com

UPPER WEST SIDE LANDMARC

This Time Warner Center eatery serves flavorful French bistro fare in a setting that stylishly mishmashes industrial and woodsy, with floorto-ceiling windows that overlook Central Park. 60th and Broadway, 3rd Floor, NYC 212-823-6123. landmarc-restaurant.com

MAREA

Chef Michael White has been awarded two Michelin stars, the 2010 James Beard Award, and other impressive accolades. His high-end Italian cuisine combines with over 750 wine options for a fresh take on coastal cuisine. 240 Central Park South Between Broadway and Seventh Ave., NYC 212-582-5100. marearestaurant.com

PIZZERIA SIRENETTA

The people behind Mermaid Inn serve Neopolitan pizzas and rustic Italian fare. Stop by 5-7pm for their happy hour featuring $12 pizza specials, an $8 aperol spritz and more! 568 Amsterdam Ave. between 87th & 88th Sts., NYC 212-799-7401. pizzeriasirenetta.com

TESSA

Chef Nicholas McCann blends French, Italian and Spanish fare in this neighborhood-approved hotspot. Wine Lovers, pay special attention to the TESSA Reserve list with over fifty labels. 349 Amsterdam Ave. between 76th & 77th Sts., NYC 212-390-1974. tessanyc.com

WEST VILLAGE COWGIRL

This Texas-style West Village favorite, conceived after Sherry Delamarter visited the Cowgirl Hall of Fame, has been serving great food and no frills fun for 25 years. Blood Orange and Prickly Pear frozen margaritas in mason jars go perfectly with Tex-Mex fare. 519 Hudson St. at West 10th St., NYC 212-633-1133. cowgirlnyc.com

TEA AND SYMPATHY

Adorable spot serving tra British favorites like Bangers & Mash, Shepherd’s Pie, Welsh Rarebit, and Roast Beef with Yorkshire pudding. Save room for Sticky Toffee Pudding! 108 Greenwich Street, NYC between Jane & Horatio Sts., 212-989-9735. teaandsympathy. com

THE LITTLE OWL

This bold Mediterranean spot boasts gravy meatballs and pork chops that rival your grandmother’s secret recipe. 90 Bedford St. at Grove, NYC 212-741-4695. thelittleowlnyc.com

TO ADVERTISE CALL 800-818-0480 TO ADVERTISE CALL 212 691-5127

BAR SOURCE Edited by Jeffrey James Keyes

CHELSEA BARRACUDA Cool music, cute crowds, wild drag shows and talent competitions hosted on the tiny stage in the rear. 275 W. 22nd St. at Eighth Ave., NYC 212-645-8613

BOXERS CHELSEA Big gay sports bar with games on flat-screens, pool tables and a smoking patio. A pizza oven dispenses mouth-watering pies, but the bartenders are even hotter. 37 W. 20th St. between Fifth and Sixth Aves., NYC 212-624-5942. boxersnyc.com

THE EAGLE This dark and cruisy leather-and-Levi’s clubs boasts a great rooftop deck and popular events for specific fetishes. 554 W. 28th St. between Tenth and Eleventh Aves., NYC 646-473-1866. eagle-ny.com

GYM Popular after work sports bar with plasma-screen TVs broadcasting games, a pool table and a basement dugout. 167 Eighth Ave. between 18th and 19th Sts., NYC 212-337-2439. gymsportsbar.com

EAST VILLAGE/LOWER EAST SIDE THE BOILER ROOM A throwback to the days when the East Village was for the punky and funky, this no-frills lounge is popular with the college set, attitude-free, and rocks with an eclectic mix of music and scruffy pool players. 86 E. 4th St. at Second Ave., NYC 212-254-7536

OSCAR WILDE

BOXERS WASHINGTON HEIGHTS

FAIRYTAIL LOUNGE Glittery Centaurs and other enchanted-forest motifs distinguish this cozy lounge in way-west HK with theme parties and guest DJs. 500 W. 48th St. between Tenth and Eleventh Aves., NYC 646-648-3897

Boasting NYC’s Best Happy Hour seven days a week, this way uptown outpost of the gay bar phenomenon always offers incredible eye candy. 3820 Broadway at 159th St., NYC. boxersnyc.com

FLAMING SADDLES

WEST VILLAGE

When not serving vodka sodas in glass steins, bartenders jump on the bar for boot-scootin’ to Achy Breaky-type tunes. 793 Ninth Ave. at 53rd St., NYC 212-713-0481. flamingsaddles.com/nyc

HARDWARE Enjoy cheap drinks at the front bar and fun tunes on the rear dance floor when live performers like Jan Sport, Marti Gould Cummings, Brita Filter and Paige Turner aren’t on stage. 697 Tenth Ave between 47th and 48th Sts., NYC 212-924-9885. hardware-bar.com

INDUSTRY Big venue with couch-filled nooks, a game room with a pool table, and industrial design that’s a nod to its parking-garage past. Tina Burner and Kizha Carr shake things up. 355 W. 52nd St. between Eighth and Ninth Aves., NYC 646-476-2747. industry-bar.com This neighborhood fixture attracts tourists, locals and theater pros from both sides of the footlights with strong drinks, cheap prices and friendly staff. 656 Ninth Ave. at 46th St., NYC 212-307-1503

POSH A mixed bag of Hell’s Kitchenites and the occasional celeb spill out onto the sidewalk as this lounge spins pop and dance tunes. 405 W. 51st St. at Ninth Ave., NYC 212-957-2222. poshbarnyc.com

RISE BAR

REBAR

This upscale boy boîte had places to perch on multiple levels, but a kickin’ sound system makes it unlikely you’ll settle down. 369 W. 46th St. at Ninth Ave., NYC 212-333-2554. ritzbarandlounge.com

EAST VILLAGE CLUB CUMMING Willkommen to this sassy, performance-based club from Alan Cumming, Benjamin Maisani, Darren Dryden and Daniel Nardicio.

Picture backstage at a Berlin nightclub where anything goes from Drag Race viewing parties to (of course!) cabaret. 505 E. 6th St. between Aves. A and B, NYC 212-777-2555. clubcummingnyc.com

THE COCK Longtime late-night haven for naughty go-go boys and those seeking debauchery from the naughty to the nightlife glitterati. 29 Second Ave. between First and Second Sts., NYC

NOWHERE Ultra-mellow East Villager with distressed décor, a pool table and what may be the smallest back room ever. 322 E. 14th St. between First and Second Aves., NYC 212-477-4744. nowherebarnyc.com

PHOENIX Find folks enjoying video games, a pool table, a jukebox and the diverse crowd in an exposed-brick space with an uncomplicated vibe.

447 E. 13th St. at Ave. A., NYC 212-477-9979. hoenixbarnyc.com

HELL’S KITCHEN/MIDTOWN WEST ATLAS SOCIAL CLUB Josh Wood, Benjamin Maisani, Pablo Raimondi, and Asi Mazar hit a home run with this HK hotspot, where celebs like Andy Cohen, Anderson Cooper, and Cher have made cameos. 753 9th Ave. between 50th and 51st Sts., NYC 212-262-8527. atlassocialclub.com

BARRAGE This HK lounge has au courant accouterments and outrageous drinks. Late happy hour from 11pm to midnight is the perfect time for a discount. 401 W. 47th St. at Ninth Ave., NYC 212-586-9390

BOXERS HK This outpost of the Chelsea sports bar features a large ground floor, basement game room dubbed The Dog Pound, and big rooftop patio. 742 Ninth Ave. at 50th St., NYC 212-951-1518. boxersnyc.com

TO ADVERTISE CALL 212 691-5127

TO ADVERTISE CALL 800-818-0480

Home to the local lesbian crowd (and a few boys), this small, unpretentious bar features a capricious décor heavy on fish. 281 W. 12th St. at Fourth St., NYC 212-243-9041. cubbyholebar.com

THE DUPLEX

Downstairs at the city’s oldest continuing cabaret/piano bar, the staff performs while serving. Upstairs is a more traditional boy bar and an intimate room that books cabaret acts. 61 Christopher St. at Seventh Ave. South, NYC 212-255-5438. theduplex.com

THE HANGAR

Manly neighborhood bar with a diverse crowd. 115 Christopher St. between Bleecker and Hudson Sts., NYC 212-627-2044

HENRIETTA HUDSON

9TH AVENUE SALOON

Acclaimed mixologist Johnny Swet sets the scene at this cocktail lounge, ironically situated at the former headquarters of NYC’s Bureau of Prohibition. The gastropub is a tribute to its great Irish namesake and displays a collection of related relics. 45 W. 27th St. at Sixth Avenue., NYC 212-213-3066. oscarwildenyc.com Sexy Chelsea hangout where G Lounge used to be with ondustrial décor and sexy staff drawing all kinds of men (especially local muscle bears). 225 W. 19th St. between Seventh and Eighth Aves., NYC 212-929-1085. rebarchelsea.com

CUBBYHOLE

Kings of NYC nightlife joined forces for this fab yet unpretentious watering hole right where you can dance all night every Friday and Saturday. 859 9th Avenue., NYC 646-892-3313. risebarnyc.com

THE RITZ BAR & LOUNGE

THERAPY The modern duplex draws a fierce crowd to weekly shows by legendary performers like Pixie Aventura. Don’t miss Paige Turner’s infamous Sunday night Slurp show. 348 W. 52nd St. between Eighth and Ninth Aves., NYC 212-397-1700. therapy-nyc.com

EAST SIDE THE TOOL BOX This two-level dive bar with a cozy downstairs hosts parties with DJs and go-go boys on Friday and Saturday. 1742 Second Ave., between 90th and 91st Sts., NYC 212-348-1288. thetoolboxnyc.com

THE TOWNHOUSE Two levels of mature gents and their younger fans swaying to live songs from the Jerry Herman oeuvre. 236 E. 58th St. between Second and Third Aves., NYC 212-754-4649. townhouseny.com

UNCLE CHARLIE’S After a remodel that put its piano in the center of the action, this effervescent lounge is once again going strong with live entertainment and multiple bars. 139 E. 45th St. between Third and Lexington Aves., NYC 212-661-9097. unclecharliesnyc.com

UPPER WEST SIDE

Popular lesbian lounge with a multicultural crowd. 438 Hudson St. at Morton St., NYC 212-924-3347.henriettahudson.com

JULIUS’

On a normal night, the city’s oldest gay bar is a comfy place for cheap drinks, burgers and fries. Once a month, Mattachine turns it into a crowded, rowdy dance party with excellent vinyl music. 159 W. 10th St. at Waverly Pl., NYC 212-243-1928. juliusbarny.com

MARIE’S CRISIS

Old-school sing-alongs are on tap at this long-running piano bar.

Stop in and “sing out, Louise!” 59 Grove St. at Seventh Ave. South, NYC 212-243-9323. mariescrisis.us

MONSTER

Sheridan Square stalwart where fab guys and dolls sing along to show tunes upstairs while DJs spin for a diverse crowd downstairs.

80 Grove St. at Seventh Ave. South, NYC 212-924-3558 Open Mon-Fri, 4pm-4am; Sat & Sun, 2pm-4am. monsterbarnyc.com

PIECES

Bop to retro dance tracks or laugh at drag queen antics like Ms. Vodka Stinger’s B-Movie Mondays. 8 Christopher St. at Sixth Ave., NYC 212-929-9291. piecesbar.com

ROCKBAR

For boys who prefer fur, there’s this butched-up bar with a fist-pumping soundtrack, cheap drinks and very sexy parties. 185 Christopher St. at Weehawken St., NYC. rockbarnyc.com

STONEWALL

Daddies, faux thugs, and girls who like girls rule this two-story birthplace of gay pride. Every night offers a different theme, e.g. drag shows, karaoke and beer blasts. 53 Christopher St. at Seventh Ave. South, NYC 212-488-2705. thestonewallinnnyc.com

TY’S

Ye Olde Boy Bar serves a loyal and friendly Christopher Street clientele — NYPD and Firemen especially welcome. 114 Christopher St. between Bleecker and Hudson Sts., NYC 212-741-9641. tys.nyc

OUTER BOROUGHS & BEYOND ALBATROSS

Homey Astoria bar with a pool table and jukebox. 36-19 24th Ave. at 38th St., Astoria, NYC 718-204-9045. albatrossastoria.com

SUITE This adorable spot attracts Columbia gays with leopard-print lamps, leather banquettes and drag entertainers. 992 Amsterdam Ave. between 109th and 110th Sts., NYC 212-222-4600. suitenyc.com

WEST END LOUNGE

ICON ASTORIA

Beefcake dancers and NYC nightlife legends flock to this unassuming Astoria watering hole for great beats and impressive drag.

31-84 33rd Street., Astoria, NY 347-808-7592. iconastoria.com

Columbia boys and neighborhood cubs converge at this Morningside watering hole for Topless Tuesdays, karaoke nights, and local drag queens. 955 West End Avenue between 107th and Duke Ellington Blvd., NYC 212-531-4759. thewestendlounge.com

GINGER’S

UPTOWN

B-burg bar with a spacious patio. 559 Lorimer St. at Metropolitan Ave., Williamsburg, 718-599-4444. metropolitanbarny.com

ALIBI LOUNGE Popular Harlem bar that’s a great spot for after work. Bring some cash for the jay-dropping go-go boys on Man Crush Mondays. 2376 Adam Clayton Powell Blvd. at 139th St., NYC 917-472-7789.

Popular with lesbians, this long, dark bar has a jukebox and an outdoor garden. 363 Fifth Ave., Park Slope, Brooklyn 718-788-0924

METROPOLITAN

THE ROSEMONT NYC

Mixed cocktail bar with eclectic entertainment and a big back deck.

63 Montrose Ave., Brooklyn 347-987-3101. therosemontnyc.com

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ACCOUNTING – ATTORNEYS

ADOPTION SERVICES

ACCOUNTING

Friends in Adoption

Dikman, Bernard L�, C�P�A� 37 W 20th St, Ste 703, NYC ������� 212 929-4299

NYC��������������������������������������������� 800 982-3678 www�friendsinadoption�org

Woloshen, Robert A. CPA

AESTHETIC SERVICES

29 W 15th St, Ste 1 NYC ........................................... 212 843-3486 www.rawcpa.com

(SEE AD THIS PAGE)

ACUPUNCTURE Acupuncture-NYC 80 Fifth Ave, Ste 906 NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 874-0898 www�acupuncture-nyc�com

Advanced Dermatology Associates

Sexual Health Men

290 Madison Ave 6th Fl NYC��������������������������������������������973 493-7607 www�sexualhealthmen�com

Stoller, Roy B., D.O.

515 Madison Ave, Ste 1205 NYC ...........................................212 920-4499 www.hairdoctornyc.com

200 Central Park South #107 NYC ............................................ 212 262-2500 NYC ............................................ 212 246-0800 www.adv-derm.com

(SEE AD HAIR REPLACEMENT PAGE 74)

(SEE AD PHYSICIANS PAGE 77)

ALLERGIES

Lexington Plastic Surgeons 113 E 39th St, NYC���������������������� 646 374-2410 www�try�lexingtonplasticsurgeons�com/ metrosource

Aziz, Michael, M�D�, FRSM

Midtown Integrative Medicine 509 Madison Ave @ 53rd St, Ste 1111 NYC��������������������������������������������212 906-9111 www�michaelazizmd�com

ARCHITECTURE David Stern Architecture

www�davidsternarchitecture�com

Torre, Martin B� RA AIA

Architecture + Planning PLLC 605 E 14th St, #8 NYC��������������������������������������������646 257-9081

ATTORNEYS Bing, Steven E�

Luna Chou, Esq.

Luna Chou, Esq. Luna Chou, Esq. Luna Chou, Esq. 212-226-2610 212-226-2610 212-226-2610

212-226-2610

LChouLaw@gmail.com w w w.LunaChouLaw.com

LChouLaw@gmail.com LChouLaw@gmail.com LChouLaw@gmail.com www.LunaChouLa w.com www.LunaChouLa w.com

w w w.LunaChouLaw.com

IMMIGRATION IMMIGRATION IMMIGRATION IMMIGRATION EQUALITY EQUALITY EQUALITY EQUALITY GREEN GREEN CARDS, FIANCE(E) VISAS, CARDS, FIANCE(E) VISAS, WAIVERS, CITIZENSHIP, ASYLUM &

WAIVERS, CITIZENSHIP, ASYLUM & FIANCE(E ) VISAS, REAL CARDS, ESTATE TRANSACTIONS GREEN CARDS, FIANCE(E ) GREEN VISAS, REAL ESTATE TRANSACTIONS WAIVERS, CITIZENSHIP, ASYLUM, WAIVERS, CITIZENSHIP, ASYLUM, 15 YEARS EXPERIENCE DIVORCE & RE AL UNCONTESTED DIVORCE & UNCONTESTED RE15 ALYEARS EXPERIENCE ESTATE TR ANSACTIONS ESTATE TR ANSACTIONS

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Chianese & Reilly Law, P�C�

122 E 42nd St, Ste 3900 NYC��������������������������������������������212 953-6447 100 Merrick Rd, Ste 103E Rockville Centre, NY �������������������516 599-2020 www�awclawyer�com

Chou, Luna, Esq.

NYC ...........................................212 226-2610 www.lunachoulaw.com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Goldman, Jeffrey E�, Esq

501 Fifth Ave #1900 NYC��������������������������������������������212 983-8999 NYC��������������������������������������������212 949-5085 www�jgoldmanlaw�com

Law Offices of Thomas Sciacca, PLLC

44 Wall St, 12th Fl NYC��������������������������������������������212 495-0317 www�sciaccalaw�com

Long & Associates

NYC��������������������������������������������212 360-0394 www�landapllc�com

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ATTORNEYS (CONTINUED) – COUNSELING/PSYCHOTHERAPY Tesler, Richard, Esq.

Dicker, Phyllis D�, L�C�S�W�, A�C�S�W�, B�C�D�

(SEE AD OPPOSITE PAGE)

Factor, Rhonda J�, PhD

41 W 72nd St NYC ...........................................212 362-6961

BARS (SEE BAR SOURCE PAGE 69)

CATERING Li-Lac Chocolates

West Village: 40 8th Ave, NYC Greenwich Village: 162 Bleecker St, NYC Grand Central: 43rd & Lexington, NYC Chelsea Market: 75 Ninth Ave, NYC Industry City: 68 35th St, Brooklyn NYC ...........................................212 924-2280 www.li-lacchocolates.com (SEE AD PAGE 58)

Paul Evans Catering

20 W 20th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 321-1822 NYC��������������������������������������������212 243-4494 www�paulevanscatering�com

CLOTHING Dave’s New York

581 Ave of the Americas, NYC Toll Free ��������������������������������������800 543-8558 www�davesnewyork�com

Jackson Boutique

www�jacksonboutiquenyc�com

CONTRACTORS/CONSTRUCTION ABS Design & Construction

NYC��������������������������������������������212 731-0642 www�abs-construction-nyc�com

COUNSELING/PSYCHOTHERAPY Angers, Marc E�, M�A� Oxon, L�C�S�W�/L�P�

Licensed Psychoanalyst, NCPsyA NYC��������������������������������������������917 678-7929

Barneson, Jeff, LCSW

119 Washington Place NYC��������������������������������������������212 252-2314 www�jeffbarneson�com

Blatter, Andrew, LCSW

NYC�������������������������������������������� 718 855-5171

85 5th Ave, Ste 912 NYC�������������������������������������������� 347 834-6057 www�rhondafactorphd�com

Jarratt, Kent, L�C�S�W�

19 W 34th St, NYC ��������212 947-7111, ext 119 Oceanport, NJ ����������������������������� 917 686-6179 www�kentjarratt�com

Volker Schuetz, PsyD Clinical Psychologist

Call 212-470-9024 for a FREE phone consultation

Individual & Couples Therapy for Gay Men Sexuality • Intimacy • Relationships

Johnson, Thomas E�, L�C�S�W�

Chelsea��������������������������������������� 212 645-3952

Kingan, Peter L�, Ph�D�

99 University Pl, 4th Fl NYC ������������������������������������������������ 917 428-2431

Koetting, Michael E�, L�C�S�W�

NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 741-2606 www�koettingpsychotherapy�com

McFadden, Stephen, LCSW SEP

435 W 23rd St NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 627-8419 www�smcfadden�com

Nelson, Joshua, Ph.D.

71 W 23rd St, Ste 1115 NYC ..............................................646 512-0043 www.jnelsonphd.com

(SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Rayhill, Daniel, Ph�D�

276 Fifth Ave #1101 NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 683-2454

1133 Broadway #913, NYC 10010 www.NYChangeManagement.com

Andrew Blatter, lcsw PSYCHO T HER APY

• Anxiety and Depression • Relationship and Social Difficulties • Body Image and Self-Esteem Issues • Career Transitions Convenient Flatiron Location andrewblatter.com 917-442-5213 ablatterlcsw@mac.com

Ross, Steven, LSCW

Union Square ������������������������������ 917 406-7900 www�stevenrosstherapy�com

Schuetz, Volker, PsyD

1133 Broadway #913 NYC ........................................... 212 470-9024 www.nychangemanagement.com

(SEE AD THIS PAGE)

• depression & anxiety • self esteem & self confidence • sexuality & sexual health • major life changes

Schwartz, Alan, M�D�, Psychiatrist

West Village/Chelsea NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 727-0923

• relationships & communication

Tallent, Marc, Ph�D�

51 Fifth Ave NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 645-5795 http://therapists�psychologytoday�com/rms/33692

NYC ...........................................917 442-5213 www.andrewblatter.com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Bloom Psychotherapy NYC

19 W 34th St, PH NYC��������������������������������������������347 921-0431 www�nycbloomtherapy�com

Campbell, Robert D., LCSW

Psychotherapy for Individuals & Couples NYC ...........................................646 783-8155 www.robertdcampbell.com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Davies, Ann Conant, M�S�W�, L�C�S�W�

740 West End Ave, Ste 1 Cell ���������������������������������������������917 923-2257 ADVERTISE CALL800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TO TO ADVERTISE CALL

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COUNSELING/SUBURBAN – EVENT PLANNING & EVENT SPACE/RENTALS

COUNSELING/SUBURBAN Kingan, Peter L., Ph.D.

31 Oak St Patchogue, NY ............................631 447-6425

DATING SERVICES

Lew, Spencer, D.D.S. 30 E 40th St #706 NYC............................................212 286-1717 www.nycdental.com

LuxDen Dental Center

SEE ALSO INTRODUCTION SERVICES

ManMate

NYC............................................212 564-4025 www.manmate.com

ManMate Dinners For 8

NYC............................................212 564-4025 www.manmate.com

Wheaton, Grant

Dating Coach NYC............................................212 564-4025

DENTISTS Babushkin, Howard, D.D.S., L.L.C.

525 West End Ave #1G, NYC .........212 874-2880 www.manhattanoasisdentistry.com

Cassidy, J.R., D.D.S.

West 10th Dental P.C. 45 W 10th St NYC............................................212 982-5883 www.west10thdental.com

2579 E 17th St, Ste 11 Brooklyn .....................................718 382-3444 www.luxden.com

Rosa, John D., D.D.S., P.C.

40 Newport Parkway, Ste P-1 Jersey City, NJ ...........................201 626-2700

(SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Sengos, Demetrios, D.D.S. West 10th Dental P.C. 45 W 10th St NYC............................................212 982-5883 www.west10thdental.com

Eviatar, Joseph, M.D., F.A.C.S. 5 W 19th St NYC............................................212 257-0007 www.omniaestheticmd.com

DENTISTS/SUBURBAN Rosa, John D., D.D.S., P.C.

40 Newport Parkway, Ste P-1 Jersey City, NJ ...........................201 626-2700

(SEE AD THIS PAGE)

DERMATOLOGY SEE ALSO PHYSICIANS

Advanced Dermatology Associates

200 Central Park South #107 NYC ...........................................212 262-2500 NYC ...........................................212 246-0800 www.adv-derm.com

(SEE AD PHYSICIANS PAGE 77)

West 10th Dental P.C. 45 W 10th St NYC............................................212 982-5883 www.west10thdental.com

DENTISTS/PERIODONTISTS

De Bonis, William B., D.D.S.

World Wide Plaza Dental Associates 370 W 50th St NYC............................................212 333-2650 www.wwpdental.com

OMNI Aesthetic MD

Bizzell, Steven J., D.M.D., D.A.B.P. 50-02 5th St Ste B, Long Island City ..........................718 530-6539 www.licdentalassociates.com

Arora, Navin, DO, FAAD

Arora Dermatology 115 Broadway, Ste 1800 NYC............................................212 244-1252 www.aroraderm.com

Goldman, Barry D., M.D.

150 Broadway #111 NYC............................................212 962-1115

Juva Skin & Laser Center

60 E 56th St #2 NYC........................................... 212 421-9501 www.juvaskin.com

Lumos Dermatology

“Stressing prevention through education and quality dental treatment...

Peter Chien, MD, PhD 37 E 28th St, Ste 304 NYC............................................646 820-1716 www.lumosdermatology.com

...while making it affordable for everyone in our community.”

OMNI Aesthetic MD

JOHN D. ROSA

Eviatar, Joseph, M.D., F.A.C.S. 5 W 19th St NYC............................................212 257-0007 www.omniaestheticmd.com

EMPLOYMENT Los Angeles Fire Department (LAFD)

D.D.S., P.C.

1700 Stadium Way LA...............................................213 847-LAFD www.joinlafd.org

GENERAL AND COSMETIC DENTISTRY

700 E Temple St, B-38 LA...............................................866 444-LAPD www.joinlapd.com

Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD)

Office conveniently located via PATH, 15 minutes from 14th Street station.

Office on ground floor of James Madison Building, directly across from Newport Mall.

40 Newport Parkway Jersey City, NJ 07310 201.626.2700 BY APPOINTMENT drrosadds@aol.com DECEMBER 2019/JANUARY 2020 METROSOURCE.COM 7272FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE.COM

EVENT PLANNING & EVENT SPACE/RENTALS SEE ALSO CATERING, WEDDING SERVICES

Elite Private Yachts

NYC ...........................................866 862-7245 www.eliteprivateyachts.com www.entertainmentcruises.com/new-york (SEE AD PAGE 65 & OPPOSITE PAGE) ADVERTISECALL CALL 800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TOTO ADVERTISE

EVENT PLANNING & EVENT SPACE/RENTALS (CONTINUED) – HAIR REMOVAL Hornblower Cruises & Events

FITNESS/GYMS/PERSONAL TRAINERS

HAIR REMOVAL

Houston Hall

Mercedes Club

200 Central Park South #107 NYC �������������������������������������������212 262-2500 NYC �������������������������������������������212 246-0800 www�adv-derm�com

Pier 40, NYC �������������������������������646 832-2805 www�hornblowerny�com/metrosource 222 W� Houston St NYC������������������������������������������� 212 582-2057

Advanced Dermatology Associates

550 W 54th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 265-1111 www�themercedesclub�com

Patina Events - Brooklyn Botanic Garden

Brooklyn �����������������������������������718 307-7133 www�patinaevents�com

FLORISTS

(SEE AD PAGE 67)

la Fleur d’Harlem

The Riverside Church

490 Riverside Dr� NYC��������������������������������������������212 870-6762 www�trcnyc�com

Yachts for All Seasons

NYC �������������������������������������������212 534-6380 Cell ��������������������������������������������917 864-7670 www�y4as�com

OMNI Aesthetic MD

203 W 144th St NYC �������������������������������������������646 850-5973 www�lafleurnyc�com

14th Street Framing Gallery 225 W 14th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 691-8156

GIFTS

Big Apple Event Audio Visual

519 8th Ave, Ste 815 NYC �������������������������������������������212 518-3175 www�avnycrentals�com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

FINANCIAL SERVICES

Eviatar, Joseph, M�D�, F�A�C�S� 5 W 19th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 257-0007 www�omniaestheticmd�com

FRAMING

(SEE AD PAGE 66)

EVENT SERVICES

(SEE AD PHYSICIANS PAGE 77)

Make Your Next Event FABULOUS

BIG APPLE EVENT AV

Li-Lac Chocolates West Village: 40 8th Ave, NYC Greenwich Village: 162 Bleecker St, NYC Grand Central: 43rd & Lexington, NYC Chelsea Market: 75 Ninth Ave, NYC Industry City: 68 35th St, Brooklyn NYC �������������������������������������������212 924-2280 www�li-lacchocolates�com

• • • • •

Weddings Corporate Trade Shows Conferences Conventions

212-518-3175

www.avnycrentals.com

(SEE AD PAGE 58)

Ameriprise Financial Services

Lance R� Kash, Financial Advisor, CFP® 122 E 42nd St #2215 NYC ����������� 646 964-9400

GUEST HOUSES/B&B’S

Law Offices of Thomas Sciacca, PLLC

Chelsea Pines Inn

44 Wall St, 12th Fl, NYC �������������212 495-0317 www�sciaccalaw�com

New York Life/NYLIFE Securities

Marlon J� Altoe 420 Lexington Ave, 15th Fl NYC������������������������������������������� 646 227-8605 Cell �������������������������������������������� 646 761-4372 www�newyorklife�com/agent/maltoe

Peloso-Barnes, Julia A�, CFP, CPM, CRPC

Purchase, NY�����������������������������914 225-6391 www�advisor�morganstanley�com/thepeloso-barnes-group

317 W 14th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 929-1023

Colonial House Inn 318 W 22nd St NYC��������������������������������������������212 243-9669

Incentra Village House 32 8th Ave @ W 12th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 206-0007 www�incentravillage�com LUNCH | BRUNCH | DI NNER | PRIVATE E V E N TS

MisterBandB

EntertainmentCruises.com/New-York

www�misterbandb�com

(SEE AD PAGE 59 & THIS PAGE)

Julia A. Peloso-Barnes, CFP®, CPM®, CRPC® Accredited Domestic Partnership Advisor® First Vice President, Portfolio Management Director, Wealth Advisor 2000 Westchester Avenue 1NC | Purchase, NY 10577 NMLS # 578741

You deserve an advisor who understands the path that has gotten you here.

Planning for LGBTQ people isn’t just my professional life, it’s my community

914-225-6391 Julia.Peloso-Barnes@morganstanley.com advisor.morganstanley.com/the-peloso-barnes-group Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards Inc. owns the certification marks CFP®, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ and federally registered CFP (with flame design) in the US. © 2019 Morgan Stanley Smith Barney LLC Member SIPC

TO ADVERTISE CALL800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TO ADVERTISE CALL

YOUR MOME NT

CRC 2514463 05/2019

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HAIR REPLACEMENT/REPLICATION – OPTOMETRISTS

HAIR REPLACEMENT/REPLICATION OMNI Aesthetic MD Eviatar, Joseph, M�D�, F�A�C�S� 5 W 19th St NYC�������������������������������������������� 212 257-0007 www�omniaestheticmd�com

Stoller, Roy B., D.O.

HOTELS Atlantic City, NJ ��������������������������609 317-1000 www�outatborgata�com

The Borgata Hotel Casino & Spa

Foxwoods Resort & Casino

Sheraton Vancouver Wall Centre Hotel

www�foxwoods�com

The Graham & Co

515 Madison Ave, Ste 1205 NYC ........................................... 212 920-4499 www.hairdoctornyc.com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Phoenicia, NY �����������������������������845 688-7871 www�thegrahamandco�com

Holiday Inn Manhattan 6th Ave - Chelsea

125 W 26th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 430-8500 www�hi-nyc�com

Hotel Hayden

127 W 28th St NYC��������������������������������������������844 423-6004 www�hotelhaydennyc�com

Christopher T. Coad md, facs Advanced LASIK Premium Lens Implants Comprehensive Eye Care Visian ICL/Refractive Castle Connolly Top Doctor 2018 Complimentary Evaluations

Hotel Henri

37 W 24th St NYC��������������������������������������������844 277-9123 www�hotelhenrinyc�com

(on elective procedures)

0% financing available

Opus Hotel Vancouver

157 West 19th St. NYC 10011 212-220-0066

www.ChelseaEyeOphthalmology.com

Sandman Suites on Davie

1160 Davie St Vancouver, BC Canada ���������������������������������������604 681-7263 www�sandmanhotels�com

322 Davie St Vancouver, BC Canada ���������������������������������������604 642-6787 www�opushotel�com

1088 Burrard St Vancouver, BC Canada ���������������������������������������604 331-1000 www�sheratonvancouver�com

Sunset Marquis

1200 Alta Loma Rd West Hollywood CA ����������������������������������������������800 858-9758 www�sunsetmarquis�com

VIVE Hotel Waikiki

2426 Kuhio Ave Honolulu, Hawaii ������������������������808 687-2000 www�vivehotelwaikiki�com

INSURANCE HealthSherpa

Toll Free ��������������������������������������844 346-9476 www�metrosource�healthsherpa�com

INTRODUCTION SERVICES SEE ALSO DATING SERVICES

ManMate

NYC��������������������������������������������212 564-4025 www�manmate�com

Best Head in Town!

LASER VISION CORRECTION SEE ALSO OPHTHALMOLOGISTS

Coad, Christopher T., M.D., F.A.C.S.

Chelsea Eye Ophthalmology 157 W 19th St NYC ...........................................212 220-0066 www.chelseaeyeophthalmology.com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

OMNI Aesthetic MD

Eviatar, Joseph, M�D�, F�A�C�S� 5 W 19th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 257-0007 www�omniaestheticmd�com

Dr. Roy B. Stoller is a Board Certified facial plastic surgeon with over 25 years experience in hair restoration medicine and surgery.

Dr. Stoller offers his patients advanced medical therapy for hair loss, including PRP injections for hair loss, Laser Hair Therapy and Scalp Micropigmentation (SMP) to camouflage hair loss with medical grade scalp tattooing.

Roy B. Stoller, D.O. | 515 Madison Ave. Suite #1205, New York, NY 10022 Call Now: 212-920-4499

www.hairdoctornyc.com

LIPOSUCTION Marfuggi, Richard M�D�, D�M�H, F�A�C�S�

50 E 69th St, NYC�����������������������212 317-1188 Denville, NJ ���������������������������������973 377-8950 www�askdrm�com

OMNI Aesthetic MD

Eviatar, Joseph, M�D�, F�A�C�S� 5 W 19th St, NYC �����������������������212 257-0007 www�omniaestheticmd�com

MARKETING SERVICES Brand2Fly

San Jose��������������������������������������408 763-7924 www�brand2fly�com

GayVan�com Travel Marketing

www�gayvan�com DECEMBER 2019/JANUARY 2020 METROSOURCE.COM 7474FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE.COM

ADVERTISECALL CALL 800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TOTO ADVERTISE

OPHTHALMOLOGISTS – PHARMACIES/DRUGS

OPHTHALMOLOGISTS

PAIN MANAGEMENT

Coad, Christopher T., M.D., F.A.C.S.

Samuelson, Stefan T., MD

Chelsea Eye Ophthalmology 157 W 19th St NYC ...........................................212 220-0066 www.chelseaeyeophthalmology.com (SEE AD OPPOSITE PAGE)

Avalon Chemists

44 E 12th St, Ste MD1 NYC............................................212 993-8573 NYC............................................212 594-1600

PERIODONTISTS

Eviatar, Joseph, M.D., F.A.C.S. 5 W 19th St NYC............................................212 257-0007 www.omniaestheticmd.com

171 Seventh Ave NYC............................................212 255-9900

Periodontist 50-02 5th St Ste B Long Island City ..........................718-530-6539 www.licdentalassociates.com

PET SUPPLIES

OPTOMETRISTS

Bigelow Chemists

414 Sixth Ave, NYC ....................212 533-2700

Chelsea Specialty Pharmacy

Bizzell, Steven J., D.M.D., D.A.B.P.

OMNI Aesthetic MD

7 2nd Ave NYC............................................212 260-3131

CVS Specialty

126 8th Ave NYC ...........................................212 807-8798 (SEE AD THIS PAGE) PHARMACIES/DRUGS CONT. �

Nulo Pet Foods

Coad, Christopher T., M.D., F.A.C.S.

Chelsea Eye Ophthalmology 157 W 19th St, NYC ...........................................212 220-0066 www.chelseaeyeophthalmology.com (SEE AD OPPOSITE PAGE)

OMNI Aesthetic MD

Eviatar, Joseph, M.D., F.A.C.S. 5 W 19th St NYC............................................212 257-0007 www.omniaestheticmd.com

West Village Eyecare Associates

10 Sheridan Square NYC............................................212 242-6592 www.eyecarenyc.com

nulo.com/love

(SEE AD PAGE 23)

PHARMACIES/DRUGS Ansonia Pharmacy

446 6th Ave NYC............................................212 477-0762 www.ansoniapharmacy.com

Personalized HIV Care and Support

Apthorp Pharmacy

• Guidance from pharmacists

2201 Broadway, NYC ..................212 877-3480

Arrow Pharmacy

883 Ninth Ave NYC ...........................................212 245-8469 www.arrowpharmacy.com

(SEE AD NEXT PAGE)

VILL AGE APOTHECARY T H E C O M M U N I T Y P H A R M AC Y T H AT C A R E S

specially trained in HIV therapy • Medication refill reminders • Pick up at our location (below)

or any CVS Pharmacy® or get delivery by mail at no extra cost*

Call 1-212-807-8798 or stop in.

CVS Pharmacy Specialty Services 126 Eighth Avenue New York, NY 10011 Monday - Friday: 8 a.m. - 9 p.m.

Saturday: 10 a.m. - 5 p.m.

fREE WELCOmE KIT! Come in

for your

BRInG THIs CARd In And RECEIVE $10 off On AnY PuRCHAsE Of $25 OR mORE Store HourS: Mon - Fri 8aM - 8pM • Sat 9aM - 6pM • Sun 10aM - 5pM 346 Bleecker St • Greenwich VillaGe, nY 10014 • VillaGeapothecarY.com

2 1 2 . 8 0 7. 7 5 6 6 TO ADVERTISE CALL800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TO ADVERTISE CALL

*Where allowed by law. In-store pick up is currently not available in Oklahoma. Puerto Rico requires first-fill prescriptions to be transmitted directly to the dispensing specialty pharmacy.

Products are dispensed by CVS Specialty® and certain services are only accessed by calling CVS Specialty directly. Certain specialty medication may not qualify. Services are also available at Long’s Drugs locations. ©2019 CVS Specialty. All rights reserved. 75-47585C 112618

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PHARMACIES/DRUGS (CONTINUED) – PHYSICIANS & MEDICAL SERVICES Mayfair Chemists

Village Apothecary

21 Seventh Ave, NYC..................212 242-1444

New London Pharmacy 246 Eighth Ave, NYC ..................212 243-4987

New York Chemists 77 Christopher St, NYC...............212 255-2525 www.newyorkchemists.com

Thompson Chemists & Thompson Alchemists 137 Thompson St 449 West Broadway NYC............................................212 598-9790 www.thompsonchemists.com

346 Bleecker St NYC ...........................................212 807-7566 www.villageapothecary.com (SEE AD PREVIOUS PAGE)

Dillon, Stephen, M.D.

Int. Med., Inf. Dis. 314 W 14th St NYC............................................212 620-0144

Dormer, Anita L., M.D., F.A.C.C.P.

PHYSICAL THERAPY

22 E 72nd St, 5th Fl NYC............................................212 535-5905

Galán, Antonio, PT, DPT, MBA, CHC

Fonville, T.W., Int. Med.

Symbio Physio Therapy

Int. Med., Gastr.

121 E 60th St, 3rd Fl NYC............................................212 980-8800

RestoreRehab Physical Therapy 664 10th Ave NYC............................................212 245-5259 www.restorerehabpt.com

214 W 29th St, Ste 901 NYC............................................917 338-6268 www.symbiopt.com

PHYSICIANS & MEDICAL SERVICES

29 Fifth Ave @ 10th St NYC............................................212 674-1020

Goldberg, Edward S., M.D.

Hsu, Ricky K., M.D.

154 W 14th St, 4th Fl NYC............................................212 627-7560

Icochea, Rosendo S., M.D.

Advanced Dermatology Associates

200 Central Park South #107 NYC ...........................................212 262-2500 NYC ...........................................212 246-0800 www.adv-derm.com

(SEE AD OPPOSITE PAGE)

Amida Care

NYC ...........................................855 462-6432 www.amidacareny.org (SEE AD PAGE 55)

Astor Medical Group

67 Irving Place, 5th Fl @ E 18th St NYC............................................212 253-2968 www.astormedical.com

Central Park Medical Associates

200 Central Park South #107 NYC ...........................................212 262-2500 NYC ...........................................212 246-0800 www.centralparkmedicalassociates.com

(SEE AD OPPOSITE PAGE)

117 E 18th St NYC............................................212 387-9199

Jaeger, Lawrence D., D.O.

200 Central Park South #107 NYC ...........................................212 246-0800 NYC ...........................................212 262-2500 www.adv-derm.com

(SEE AD OPPOSITE PAGE)

Jarratt, Kent, L.C.S.W.

19 W 34th St, Penthouse Ste NYC.............................. 212 947-7111, ext 119 Oceanport, NJ .............................917 686-6179 www.kentjarratt.com

Leach, Eric G., N.P.

154 W 14th St, 4th Fl, NYC ........212 627-7560

Lexington Plastic Surgeons

113 E 39th St NYC............................................646 374-2410 www.try.lexingtonplasticsurgeons.com/ metrosource

Coad, Christopher T., M.D., F.A.C.S.

Chelsea Eye Ophthalmology 157 W 19th St NYC ...........................................212 220-0066 www.chelseaeyeophthalmology.com (SEE AD OPTOMETRISTS PAGE 74)

Mandell, William, M.D.

Infectious Diseases 31 Washington Sq West NYC............................................212 475-8833

Marfuggi, Richard A., M.D., D.M.H., F.A.C.S.

50 E 69th St NYC............................................212 317-1188 Denville, NJ .................................973 377-8950 www.askdrm.com

Continuing to Provide Courteous, Compassionate, Professional Customer Service.

883 Ninth Avenue @ 57th Street Ask AAHIVM Specialists Michael and Krista About PrEP, Your Current Regimen, or How to Best Take Your Medication

Tel 212.245.8469

Serving New York Since 1940

DECEMBER 2019/JANUARY 2020 METROSOURCE.COM 7676FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE.COM

Fax 212.586.1502

Maze Sexual & Reproductive Health

Maze Men’s Health Maze Women’s Health Maze Labs Maze Cord Blood 633 Third Ave, Ste 9B NYC ...........................................646 585-8980 www.mazehealth.com (SEE AD PAGE 54) PHYSICIANS CONT. � ADVERTISECALL CALL 800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TOTO ADVERTISE

Advanced Dermatology Associates Proudly Serving the Community for Over Twenty Years MEDICAL, COSMETIC & SURGICAL DERMATOLOGY

All Skin, Hair & Nail Disorders.

All Skin Growths On-Site HIV & STD Screening, Immediate Results

Dermatology and Sexually Transmitted Diseases.

Board Certified.

University Affiliated.

Confidential Treatment of All STD’s

www.adv-derm.com 200 Central Park South, Suite 107

212-262-2500 Day, Evening, Weekend and Same Day Appoitments Available.

All Major Credit Cards and Insurance Plans Accepted.

The Genital Wart Treatment Center A private medical facility specializing in the diagnosis and treatment of genital warts and all STD’s in a caring, supportive and confidential environment.

Board Certified Specialists • Diagnosis and Treatment of ALL Sexually Transmitted Diseases Painless Treatment with the Latest & Most Effective Therapies Available • On-Site HIV Antibody Testing • Immediate Results • Specializing in the Successful Treatment of Recurrent Genital Warts

www.CentralParkMedicalAssociates.com Central Park Medical Associates 200 Central Park South, Suite 107

212-246-0800

COMPLETELY CONFIDENTIAL

Day, Evening and Weekend Appointments Available. All Major Credit Cards and Insurance Plans Accepted. 77 METROSOURCE.COM FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

PHYSICIANS & MEDICAL SERVICES (CONTINUED) – REAL ESTATE/SUBURBAN Midtown Integrative Medicine

OMNI Aesthetic MD

Aziz, Michael, M.D., FRSM 509 Madison Ave @ 53rd St, Ste 1111 NYC............................................212 906-9111 www.michaelazizmd.com

Eviatar, Joseph, M.D., F.A.C.S. 5 W 19th St, NYC .......................212 257-0007 www.omniaestheticmd.com

290 Madison Ave 6th Fl, NYC .....973 493-7607 www.sexualhealthmen.com

Pearl, Alan, M.D., Psychiatrist

Cosmetical Aesthetics 157 E 57th St, NYC 181 7th Ave, NYC.......................212 989-6555 www.skintologyny.com

135 W 70th St, NYC ...................212 724-5188

Namdar, Isaac, M.D. Ear, Nose, and Throat Specialist 425 W 59th St NYC............................................212 262-4444 1090 Amsterdam Ave NYC............................................212 663-2210 www.newyorkentspecialist.com www.namdarmd.com

Samuelson, Stefan T., MD

44 E 12th St, Ste MD1 NYC............................................212 993-8573 NYC............................................212 594-1600

PLASTIC SURGERY Dr. WW Med Spa and Laser Clinic

85-16 Queens Blvd, 2F, Elmhurst, NY 139 Centre St #224, NYC ...........718 457-0707 www.drwwmedspa.com

Lexington Plastic Surgeons

113 E 39th St NYC............................................646 374-2410 www.try.lexingtonplasticsurgeons.com/ metrosource

Marfuggi, Richard A., M.D., D.M.H F.A.C.S.

David Bonavita Licensed Associate Real Estate Broker 212.501.8281 david.bonavita@compass.com www.davidbonavita.com David Bonavita is a real estate agent affiliated with Compass. Compass is a licensed real estate broker and abides by equal housing opportunity laws.

50 E 69th St NYC............................................212 317-1188 Denville NJ ...............................................973 377-8950 www.askdrm.com

OMNI Aesthetic MD

Eviatar, Joseph, M.D., F.A.C.S. 5 W 19th St, NYC .......................212 257-0007 www.omniaestheticmd.com

Sexual Health Men Skintology

PODIATRISTS Ciment, Ethan J., D.P.M.

Collins, Michael, D.P.M. Chelsea Foot & Ankle Center 37 W 20th St, Ste 308, NYC .......646 929-4149 www.chelseafootandankle.com

REAL ESTATE Bonavita, David

Compass NYC �������������������������������������������212 501-8281 www�davidbonavita�com (SEE AD THIS PAGE)

Chroughan, Judy

Julie B. Fee Sotherby’s 49 Purchase St Rye, NY ......................................914 262-5323

Coldwell Bank Residential Brokerage

JC Waterfront – Team Francesco Robert G. Harris 1 2nd St, Ste 1 & 4 Jersey City, NJ .............................201 604-4200 Cell .............................................646 334-0559

Enzo Morabito Team

Douglas Elliman Real Estate Bridgehampton .......................... 631 537-6519 Cell .............................................516 695-3433 www.theenzomorabitoteam.elliman.com

Hendler, Lisa E.

Berkshire Hathaway Blake Realtors Kinderhook, NY ..........................518 929-4519

McGrotty, Amy, JD

Castelli Luxury Real Estate Services Fort Lauderdale, FL......................954 347-1732 www.amy.castellihomes.com

Powell, DeWayne A.

Town Residential NYC............................................917 748-5100 www.townresidential.com

Prince, Keith A.

Brown Harris Stevens NYC............................................917 826-3451 www.brownharrisstevens.com

TF Cornerstone www.tfc.com

Wright, Daniel

Compass NYC �������������������������������������������917 304-4270 (SEE AD PAGE 53 & THIS PAGE)

New York from a new perspective.

REAL ESTATE/SUBURBAN Habeeb-Clark, Deborah

Keller Williams Hudson Valley, NY .......................845 800-5413

Perasso, Matt

Daniel Wright Licensed Real Estate Salesperson M: 917.304.4270 DECEMBER 2019/JANUARY 2020 METROSOURCE.COM 7878FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020 METROSOURCE.COM

Prominent Properties/Sotheby’s International Realty 2 Main St, Edgewater, NJ ............201 840-8898 Cell .............................................917 834-0454 www.goldcoastcribs.com ADVERTISECALL CALL 800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TOTO ADVERTISE

RESTAURANTS – WINE & SPIRITS

RESTAURANTS (SEE RESTAURANT BITES PAGE 68 )

RETAIL Eva’s Supplements

11 W 8th St (bet 5th & 6th Aves) NYC������������������������������������������� 212 982-2500 www�evassupplements�com

SCHOOLS Brooklyn Heights Montessori School

Houston Hall

222 W� Houston St, NYC ����������� 212 582-2057

Li-Lac Chocolates

West Village: 40 8th Ave, NYC Greenwich Village: 162 Bleecker St, NYC Grand Central: 43rd & Lexington, NYC Chelsea Market: 75 Ninth Ave, NYC Industry City: 68 35th St, Brooklyn NYC �������������������������������������������212 924-2280 www�li-lacchocolates�com (SEE AD PAGE 58)

Make My Cake

185 Court St, Brooklyn ���������������718 858-5100 www�bhmsny�org

NYC��������������������������������������������212 234-2344 www�makemycake�com

Rudolf Steiner School

NYC��������������������������������������������212 627-8838 www�manhattanpenthouse�com

15 E 79th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 535-2130 www�steiner�edu

TRAVEL Bucks County Pennsylvania

www�visitbuckscounty�com

Kennedy Travel

Manhattan Penthouse

Paul Evans Catering

20 W 20th St NYC��������������������������������������������212 321-1822 NYC��������������������������������������������212 243-4494 www�paulevanscatering�com

Proposition Love

www�propositionlove�com

The Riverside Church

490 Riverside Dr� NYC��������������������������������������������212 870-6762 www�trcnyc�com

Yachts for All Seasons

NYC �������������������������������������������212 534-6380 Cell ��������������������������������������������917 864-7670 www�y4as�com (SEE AD PAGE 66)

New York Zoos and Aquarium

NYC��������������������������������������������718 741-3836 www�nyzooevents�com

Oheka Castle

135 West Gate Dr Huntington, NY ��������������������������631 659-1400 www�oheka�com

WILLS Law Offices of Thomas Sciacca, PLLC

44 Wall St, 12th Fl NYC��������������������������������������������212 495-0317 www�sciaccalaw�com

130 W 42nd St #401 NYC��������������������������������������������212 398-0999 Toll Free ��������������������������������������800 237-7433 www�kennedytravel�com

Our Wedding Officiant NYC

Peter Boruchowitz NYC��������������������������������������������917 523-1438 www�nyc-gay-weddings�com

WINE & SPIRITS

Ogunquit Chamber of Commerce

Patina Events - Brooklyn Botanic Garden

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(SEE AD PAGE 67)

Cork Wines & Spirits

Sullivan Catskills

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TRAVEL/GETAWAYS Foxwoods Resort & Casino

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Visit Philadelphia

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PARTIES

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Hornblower Cruises & Events

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FIRE ISLAND PINES – CHERRY GROVE

BARS

Horizon Beach House

Blue Whale

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Cherry’s

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Cherry Grove Beach Hotel

TRANSPORTATION

Dune Point

Cherry Grove ������������������������������631 597-6261

NORTH JERSEY G&L BOWLERS Belle Aire Lanes West Caldwell, NJ 201 823-2250

BIG APPLE SOFTBALL LEAGUE 208 West 13th St New York, NY 10011 212 696-7482

CHEER NY CHEERLEADING Felipe Hernandez 888 671-7312 www.cheerny.org

CITY CRUISERS MC Old Chelsea Station PO Box 1614 New York, NY 10011 www.citycruisers.com (gay men’s motorcycle club)

EZRYDERS SNOWBOARDING 445 W 46th St #4D New York, NY 10036 www.ezryders@ondbdx.com

FAST AND FABULOUS CYCLING P.O. Box 23008, Ansonia Sta New York, NY 10023 212 567-7160

FRONT RUNNERS NY P.O. Box 87 Ansonia Sta New York, NY 10023 212 799-8781 www.frny.org

GARDEN STATE GAY BOWLING LEAGUE www.gsgbo.com

GOTHAM VOLLEYBALL P.O. Box 961 New York, NY 10034 212 388-8208 info@gothamvolleyball.org

KNIGHTS WRESTLING CLUB P.O. Box 720161 Jackson Heights, NY 11372 718 815-3244

NY GAY POOL LEAGUE PO Box 1502 Ansonia Sta New York, NY 10023 212 496-4585

NY RAMBLER’S SOCCER CLUB, INC. 917 767-9789 www.nyramblers.com

NYC GAY BASKETBALL LEAGUE www.nycgaybasketball.org

OUT OF BOUNDS NYC & TEAM NEW YORK PO Box 372, Times Sq Station New York, NY 10108 www.oobnyc.org

PINK PONG NY Sunnyside, Queens 718 623-2926 www.pinkpongfoundation.org

SUN/MON/TUE NIGHT TEAMS c/o Chelsea Piers AMF Bowl Pier 60, New York, NY 10011 212 835-2691

SUNDANCE OUTDOOR ADVENTURE SOCIETY www.sundanceoutdoor.org sundanceoutdoor@yahoo.com

TEAM NEW YORK AQUATICS 212 691-3440 (hotline)

CULTURAL, ETHNIC & SOCIAL

Grove Pizza & Restaurant

Cherry Grove ������������������������������631 597-6766

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Metrosource is committed to helping non-profit organizations in their ongoing efforts to serve our diverse community.

Steel Gym

Pines www�steelgym�com

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Sayville Ferry

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LONG ISLAND RAVENS MC CLUB c/o Long Island Eagle 94 Clinton Ave Bayshore, NY 11706 631 968-2750 www.liravensmc.org

MONDAY NIGHT FOURPLAY BOWLING LEAGUE Syosset Bowl 631 842-5166

APICHA 400 Broadway New York, NY 10013 212 334-6029 www.apicha.org

BEST FRIENDS ANIMAL SOCIETY 5001 Angel Canyon Rd Kanab, UT 84741 435 644-2001 www.bestfriends.org

ADVERTISECALL CALL 800-818-0480 212 691-5127 TOTO ADVERTISE

See the steps you can take to help stop HIV.

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NEW YORK COMMUNITY RESOURCES Metrosource is committed to helping non-profit organizations in their ongoing efforts to serve our diverse community.

BIG GAY MEN OF NEW YORK 9111 Liberty Ave #662 Ozone Park, NY 11417 631 780-2807 www.convergence.nyc

LESBIAN HERSTORY ARCHIVES PO Box 1258 New York, NY 10116 718 768-3953

QUEENS L&G PRIDE COMMITTEE PO Box 580445 Flushing, NY 11358 718 460-4064

EMPIRE CITY MEN’S CHORUS P.O. Box 1017 New York, NY 10185 empirecitymenschorus.org

LESLIE-LOHMAN MUSEUM OF GAY AND LESBIAN ART 26 Wooster St New York, NY 10013 www.leslielohman.org

QUEENS PRIDE HOUSE 76-11 37th Ave Jackson Heights, NY 11372 718 429-5309

GAY & BI FATHERS FORUM OF GREATER NY PO Box 1321, Midtown Sta New York, NY 10018 212 721-4216 (recording) 718 728-0476 GAY & LESBIAN ALLIANCE AGAINST DEFAMATION (GLAAD) 150 West 26th St New York, NY 10001 212 807-1700 www.glaad.org GAY FATHERS OF NY 245 Eighth Ave #897 New York, NY 10011 212 388-2618 GAY MEN OF AFRICAN DESCENT 44 Court St, 10th Fl, Ste 1000 Brooklyn, NY 10201 718 222-6300 www.gmad.org GAY MEN OF THE BRONX PO Box 511, Bronx, NY 10451 www.gmob.org IMPERIAL QUEENS & KINGS OF NY 70-A Greenwich Ave #120 New York, NY 10011 212 229-5900 x3655 IN OUR OWN WRITE 208 West 13th St New York, NY 10014 212 620-7310 x305 (monthly readings) IN THE LIFE 30 West 26th St, 7th Fl New York, NY 10011 212 255-6012 JERSEY CITY LESBIAN & GAY OUTREACH (JCLGO) 113 Pavonia Ave #247 Jersey City, NJ 07302 201 333-5725 LATINOS & LATINAS DE AMBIENTE/NY (LLANY) 208 West 13th St New York, NY 10014 212 367-1092 LESBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL & TRANSGENDER COMMUNITY SERVICES CENTER 208 West 13th St New York, NY 10014 212 620-7310 www.gaycenter.org LESBIAN & GAY NATURAL HISTORY GROUP OF NY 80 Garfield Pl Brooklyn, NY 11215 718 965-0013

82 82

LIVE OUT LOUD 45 West 36th Street, 6th Fl New York, NY 10018 212 378-4095 www.liveoutloud.info THE LOFT-LOWER HUDSON VALLEY LGBT CENTER 252 Bryant Ave White Plains, NY 10605 914 948-2932 www.loftgaycenter.org THE L.I. GAY & LESBIAN FILM FESTIVAL ORG P.O. Box 360 East Northport, NY 11731 www.liglff.org LONG ISLAND GAY & LESBIAN YOUTH 34 Park Ave Bay Shore, NY 11706 631 665-2300 www.ligaly.org LONG ISLAND RAVENS M.C. c/o The Long Island Eagle 94 North Clinton Ave Bay Shore, NY 11706 631 968-2750 www.liravensmc.org

QUEENS RAINBOW COMMUNITY CENTER 30-74 Steinway St, 2nd Fl Astoria, NY 11105 718 204-5955 SERVICES AND ADVOCACY FOR GLBT ELDERS (SAGE) 305 Seventh Ave New York, NY 10001 212 741-2247 www.sageusa.org SOUTHERNERS/L&G MEN IN NY PO Box 881 New York, NY 10008-0881 STONEWALL CHORALE Box 920, Old Chelsea Sta New York, NY 10011 212 971-5813 STONEWALL COMMUNITY FOUNDATION 119 West 24th St, 7th Fl New York, NY 10011 212 367-1155 www.stonewallfoundation.org TRI STATE LG&B STUDENT COALITION 208 West 13th St New York, NY 10014

MALES AU NATUREL (MAN) MEN’S NUDIST GROUP 347 704-0704 www.males.org

HEALTH/ COUNSELING

MEN OF ALL COLORS TOGETHER NEW YORK PO Box 1518 Ansonia Station, NY 10023

AIDS CENTER OF QUEENS COUNTY 97-45 Queens Blvd #1220 Rego Park, NY 11374 718 896-2500

NYC GAY MEN’S CHORUS 561 Seventh Ave, Ste 803 New York, NY 10018 212 344-1777 www.nycgmc.org NYC PRIDE 154 Christopher St, Suite 1D New York, NY 10014 212 807-7433 www.nycpride.org PARENTS AND FRIENDS OF LESBIANS AND GAYS (P-FLAG) PO Box 553 New York, NY 10021 212 463-0629 THE POINT FOUNDATION 5757 Wilshire Blvd, Suite 370 LA, CA 90036 866 33-Point www.pointfoundation.org PRIME TIMERS c/o Don Hargus 208 Anderson St, Suite 8DS Hackensack, NJ 07601 201 488-4839

AIDS DRUG ASSISTANCE PROGRAM (ADAP) 800 542-2437 AIDS HEALTHCARE FOUNDATION 475 Atlantic Ave Brooklyn, NY 11217 718 637-2970 888 AIDS-CARE www.ahfpharmacy.org AIDS HOTLINE/NYC DEPT OF HEALTH 311 Broadway, 4th Fl New York, NY 10007 800 TALK-HIV

THE ALLIANCE FOR POSITIVE CHANGE 64 West 35th Street, 3rd Fl New York, NY 10001 212.645-0875 www.alliance.nyc (SEE AD PREVIOUS PAGE) AMERICAN FOUNDATION FOR AIDS RESEARCH 120 Wall St New York, NY 10005 212 806-1600 ANTI-VIOLENCE PROJECT 240 West 35th St, 12th Fl New York, NY 10001 212 714-1184 212 714-1141 (Hotline) BAILEY HOLT HOUSE 180 Christopher St New York, NY 10014 212 337-3000 BAILEY HOUSE 275 Seventh Ave, 12th Fl New York, NY 10001 212 633-2500 BETH ISRAEL MEDICAL CENTER AIDS CLINICAL TRIAL UNIT DIV OF INFECTIOUS DISEASES 350 East 17th St, 3rd Fl New York, NY 10003 212 420-4519

GAY MEN’S HEALTH CRISIS 446 West 33rd St New York, NY 10001 212 367-1273 212 367-1489 800 243-7692 www.gmhc.org GOD’S LOVE WE DELIVER 166 Ave of the Americas New York, NY 10013 212 294-8142 212 294-8100 www.godslovewedeliver.org www.racetodeliver.org GREENWICH HOUSE 80 Fifth Ave New York, NY 10011 212 691-2900 HEALTH EDUCATION AIDS LIAISON PO Box 1103 New York, NY 10113 212 873-0780 HETRICK MARTIN INSTITUTE 212 674-2400 www.hmi.org

NAMES PROJECT NYC 75 Varick St #1404 New York, NY 10013-1917 212 226-2292 NYC DEPT OF HEALTH OFFICE OF G&L HEALTH 125 Worth St, Suite CN67 New York, NY 10013 212 442-6944 PROJECT ACHIEVE New York, 212 305-2201 Project ACHIEVE (Union Square) New York, 212 388-0008 www.nycvaccine.org www.hopetakesaction.org THE SAMARITANS OF NEW YORK SUICIDE PREVENTION HOTLINE PO Box 1259 New York, NY 10159 212 673-3000 (24 Hours) TALK SAFE + PLUSES 203 West St #408 New York, NY 212 604-1500 TREVOR PROJECT 9056 Santa Monica Blvd #100 West Hollywood, CA 90069 310 271-8845 VILLAGE NURSING HOME DAY TREATMENT PROGRAM 133 West 20th St, Ground Fl New York, NY 10011 212 633-1616

BODY POSITIVE OF NY 19 Fulton St Suite 308B New York, NY 10038 212 566-7333 800 566-6599

HEALTHSHERPA 844 346-9476 www.metrosource. healthsherpa.com

BROADWAY CARES/EQUITY FIGHTS AIDS 165 West 46th St #1300 New York, NY 10036 212 840-0770

HISPANIC AIDS FORUM, INC. 213 W 35th St, 12th Fl New York, NY 10001 212 868-6230 www.hafnyc.org

LAMBDA LEGAL DEFENSE AND EDUCATION FUND 120 Wall St #1500 New York, NY 10005 212 809-8585

HIV STOPS WITH ME www.hivstopswithme.org

LEGAL (L&G LAW ASSN OF GREATER NY) 799 Broadway #340 New York, NY 10003 212 459-4873

BROOKLYN AIDS TASK FORCE 465 Dean St Brooklyn, NY 11217 718 783-0883 CALLEN LORDE COMMUNITY HEALTH CENTER 356 West 18th St New York, NY 10011 212 271-7200 CHEST (CTRHIV/AIDS EDUCATION STUDIES & TRAINING) 250 West 26th Street, 3rd Floor New York, NY 212 206-7919 DESIGN INDUSTRIES FOUNDATION FOR AIDS (DIFFA) 200 Lexington Ave #1016 New York, NY 10016 212 727-3100

AIDS RELATED COMMUNITY SERVICES 2269 Saw Mill River Rd Elmsford, NY 10523 914 345-8888

F.E.G.S. MANHATTAN COUNSELING CENTER 80 Van Dam St New York, NY 10013 212 366-8289

AIDS SERVICE CENTER NYLIVEC 64 West 35th St New York, NY 212 645-0875 www.ascnyc.org

FRIENDS HOUSE IN ROSEHILL PMB#248 50 Lexington Avenue New York, NY 10010 212 995-5000 www.friendshousenyc.org

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GAY MEN OF AFRICAN DESCENT 44 Court St, 10th Fl, Ste 1000 Brooklyn, NY 10201 718 222-6300 www.gmad.org

INSTITUTION FOR HUMAN IDENTITY 322 Eighth Ave, Suite #802 New York, NY 10011 212 243-2830 www.ihi-therapycenter.org LI ASSN FOR AIDS CARE (LIAAC) 631 385-AIDS (hotline) 631 385-2451 MEN OF COLOR AIDS PREVENTION PROGRAM (MOCA) 125 Worth St, Box 67 New York, NY 10013 212 788-4402 MEN’S HIV SUPPORT GROUP 212 877-8227 x214 MINORITY TASK FORCE ON AIDS 475 Riverside Dr New York, NY 10115 212 870-2691 NAMES PROJECT NJ P.O. Box 716 New Brunswick, NJ 732 249-3933

LEGAL

LESBIANS LESBIANS ABOUT VISUAL ART 118 Fort Greene Pl Brooklyn, NY 11217 LES HERSTORY ARCHIVES PO Box 1258 New York, NY 10116 718 768-3953 LESBIAN MOTHERS @ THE LOFT 180 East Post Rd Lower Level, White Plains, NY 914 948-4922

POLITICAL LOG CABIN REPUBLICANS OF NY Radio City Station PO Box 2321 New York, NY 10101 212 202-6431 www.newyork.logcabin.org

TOTO ADVERTISE ADVERTISECALL CALL800-818-0480 212 691-5127

NEW YORK COMMUNITY RESOURCES Metrosource is committed to helping non-profit organizations in their ongoing efforts to serve our diverse community.

PRIDE DEMOCRATS 70 Greenwich Ave New York, NY 10011 212 613-6039 STONEWALL COMMUNITY FOUNDATION 119 West 24th St, 6th Fl New York, NY 10011 212 367-1155 STONEWALL DEMOCRATIC CLUB 212 561-9008 www.stonewalldems.com STONEWALL REPUBLICANS PO Box 650052 Fresh Meadows, NY 11365 718 357-7075

PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATION OF LESBIAN AND GAY AFFIRMATIVE PSYCHOTHERAPISTS 250 West 15th St New York, NY 10011 212 517-1722 FSIX FINANCIAL SERVICE INDUSTRY EXCHANGE www.fsix.org GAY OFFICERS ACTION LEAGUE PO Box 2038, Canal St Sta New York, NY 10013 NATIONAL GAY & LESBIAN CHAMBER OF COMMERCE NY 340 West 42nd Street New York, NY 10108 646 964-5027 www.nglccny.org OUT PROFESSIONALS 332 Bleecker St #149 New York, NY 10014 212 462-9255 THE PUBLISHING TRIANGLE 332 Bleecker Street #D36 New York, NY 10014 www.publishingtriangle.org

REFERRALS/ SWITCHBOARDS G&L SWITCHBOARD P.O. Box 693 New York, NY 212 989-0999 THE GAY PARENTING FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE FUND New York, NY 10011 www.menhavingbabies.org

TREVOR PROJECT 212 545-0081 www.thetrevorproject.org

RELIGIOUS BROADWAY UNITED CHURCH OF CHRIST 263 West 86 St, 3rd Fl New York, NY 10024 212 316-5700 www.bwayucc.org CHURCH OF ST PAUL & ST ANDREW 263 West 86th St New York, NY 10024 212 362-3179 COMMUNITY CHURCH OF NY 40 East 35th St New York, NY 10016 212 683-4988 www.ccny.org CONGREGATION BEIT SIMCHAT TORAH 130 West 30th St New York, NY 10001 212 929-9498 DIGNITY NEW YORK PO Box 1554 New York, NY 10150 646 418-7039 Brooklyn - 718 565-2171 Metro NJ - 973 857-4040 New Bruns. - 732 968-9263 Nassau - 516 781-6225 Suffolk - 631 654-5367 INTEGRITY/NEW YORK (LBGT EPISCOPALIANS) PO Box 20067 New York, NY 10011 212 691-7181 MARBLE COLLEGIATE CHURCH 1 West 29th St New York, NY 10001 212 686-2770 www.marblechurch.org METROPOLITAN COMMUNITY CHURCH OF NY 446 West 36th St New York, NY 10018 212 629-7440 www.mccny.org MIDDLE COLLEGIATE CHURCH 112 Second Ave @ 7th St New York, NY 10003 212 477-0666 www.middlechurch.org NOT SO CHURCHY www.notsochurchy.org ST. JOHN’S LUTHERAN CHURCH Reverend Mark Erson 81 Christopher St. New York, NY 10014 212-242-5737 www.stjohnsnyc.org

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8383

EUREKA O’HARA

Drag Queen Darling of RuPaul’s Drag Race Seasons 9 and 10 coming to HBO.

BY ALEXANDER RODRIGUEZ

Where were you when you found out that you had been cast on RuPaul’s Drag Race?

I was at home in my Government apartment, to be honest, wondering how I was going to pay bills and buy this wig I really wanted. Signing up for classes for the new semester at ETSU. What was it like growing up gay in Tennessee?

East TN can be a lot less open-minded. Growing up I was the sissy boy (that was bullied), but I had sisters that beat people up for me. [laughs]. I didn’t come out officially until my senior year, when I lost my best friend and was convinced to stop going to church. I just fell into a nightlife because of it.

You had a very close relationship with your Mom that you shared with the public. I can’t even imagine what it was like losing her.

There is a lot of grief in our community, whether involving loved ones we’ve lost or ones we grieve for that are still with us. What advice can you give someone from our community in dealing with grief?

I honestly don’t know. No one can tell you how to grieve, I think we all do

84

FEBRUARY/MARCH 2020

METROSOURCE.COM

it in different ways, but you have to allow yourself to grieve and process it.

Turn to people in your life that love you and just talk about it. It’s only been 6 months and I miss her more than I ever thought I could miss someone.

Honestly, I wish I knew the right answer.

Is it hard to make real friendships/maintain relationships with your status in the entertainment industry?

No, I think you must be more selective. Also, I just think everyone should be careful no matter what job you have. If you’re living life, you’re busy and you can only invest time into so many people without overextending yourself. Quality, not Quantity. At the same time, I Know No Stranger.

What is one RuPaul challenge you wish you could go back and redo? What would you have done differently?

Cher-Rusical, because I let an emotional moment from my past doubt my ability. I love to sing, and I enjoy it. I would have loved to have sucked up my fear at the moment and really turned it for Cher and the world. Rockstar Fantasy!

Spill the tea girl, what is one gossipy thing about the behind the scenes of RuPaul that we didn’t get to see?

Orange Alert was a runway that we were potentially going do on Season 10 but didn’t, so we all had orange looks we didn’t use, except Asia who used hers for the Twin Styling challenge. Then they ended up doing that Runway on season 11.

You have been a, pardon the pun, big spokesperson for body positivity and self-confidence. Has body acceptance really changed in the LGBTQ community or is it just a phase?

It’s not changed completely; it has a long way to go. Lizzo is helping a lot, I believe, in the idea to just accept yourself and others will follow your lead.

People don’t like “different” or “conventionally sexually unattractive”, but we are changing the image of attraction. So, I believe there is hope.

What would you be doing if you weren’t doing drag?

I studied Radio TV and Film, so I’d hopefully still be working in TV or Film.

Or I always wanted to be a Science Teacher.

What is a challenge that you would add to RuPaul’s Drag Race?

I miss the Puppet Challenge (The Challenge where you dress puppets up as fellow contestants while mimicking them). They recently did it on Drag Race UK and I was like, I wish we did that on Season 10.

You did a makeover on Zachary Quinto. Did he mention me at all?

Did you fall in love?

I love my Daughter Noa Fence. What a dream to work with. I mean he is truly a gem.

It takes courage to release your own music, especially since the RuPaul fan world can be chatty in a negative way. What inspired you to cross that line and go solo?

For fun. Why not? I love music and performing and making art. I do my music how my character Eureka would. That’s what makes it different.

What do your fans tell you the most?

Proportionizing; I love you too; and girl those pants are a lil tight we can see your... muffin top (dirty minds) lol!

THIS PAGE: IMAGE COURTESY OF EUREKA O’HARA

VIEWS

LAST CALL

What do you get when you put Eureka O’Hara, Bob the Drag Queen and Shangela Laquifa Wadley together? A six-part unscripted series called “We’re Here,”set to debut this spring. Eureka, Bob and Shangela will recruit small-town residents to train for a one-night only drag performance. We got some tea from Eureka on growing up gay in Tennessee, RuPaul’s Drag Race, and wanting to be science teacher.

WHAT SHOULD I DO AFTER MY HIV TEST? I AM HIV POSITIVE.

I AM HIV NEGATIVE.

LIVE A LONGER, HEALTHIER LIFE! Either way, talk to a healthcare provider about HIV treatment or HIV prevention.

There’s no cure, but there’s something everyone can do to help stop the virus.

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