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Panel Debates ffirmati e ction by Corey Hili Four panelists discu~ the pros and cons of affirmative action at a recent forum sponsored by Consider magazine. Entitled" Affirmative Action: Re-examining the Status Quo," the event was moderated by U-M professor of philosophy Carl Cohen. The two panelists who spoke in support of affirmative action policies were Charles Stith, director of the organization for a New Equality, and Edgar Jerome Dew, chairman of the Michigan chapter of the National Conference of Black Lawyers. Stith spoke first and emphasized the necessity of affirmative action because he believes that discrimination is real in terms of its history and former codification in the Constitution. Resentment toward blacks in this country did not begin with affirmative action, he argued, and therefore complaints that it increases racial tensions is admissible. Stith believes

that Affirmative action asks people to must therefore be addressed by the government. because they often stick with look past the color of a person's skin, but the content of their character." He conblacks. Ideally, he believes affirmative action should cluded by outlining three benefits of afsomeday come to firmative action: it is an end. Dew challenged those who an opportunity to "balance the nation's oppose affirmative action and associmoral scales," it allows the nation to ate it exclUSively with blacks either take advantage of its diversity, and it;,. to consider the p0S7 makes a wholesale sibility or to sooth commitment which their feelings of inferiority. He added, will not permit race fly ou will have to to be used as a u: . 11 decide over time "trump card." Dew reiterated Professor Laurence Thomas what is approptimany of Stith's comments and added ate. In any event, the government has that affirmative action is an effort to remmade an effort to help minorities. There edy the wrongs done to certain people must be some effort to address these ills." through slavery, stressing that the vesThe other two panelists, Laurence tiges of slavery often hinder blacks and Thomas,a professor of philosophy at II

AIDS, Testing Increases at the U-M by Tony Ghecea When Magic Johnson revealed that he was HIV positive, he did more to awaken the American public to the virus that causes AIDS than Liz Taylor, RE.M. and the U.S. government combined. If a popular athlete could be exposed to the virus that causes AIDS, the.n every Tom, Dick, and Earvin suddenly figured it would be wise to get him or herself tested as well. And that is exactly what America has begun to do. According to Polly Paulson of the University Health Service (UHS), "The number of people coming for testing doubled for the first week and a half after Magic came forward with his case. During the two days following his press conference, we received about 40 calls regarding AIDS testinSt compared to the three or four calls we get on a normal day." The initial effect of Johnson's announcement, however, was somewhat short-lived. As Paulson indicated, "The number of tests we are doing has pretty much tapered off to norma11evels now." Nevertheless, a large number of

people who would never before have thought about getting tested are starting to think about getting tested now. "All of the people who came during that initial period were really 'low-risk' cases," said Paulson, "and that's good, because it shows that even people who don't engage in behaviors which usually facilitate AIDS transfer are starting to think twice about their health." The Fletcher Street UHS clinic normally tests about 70 people per month, 60% of whom are men. The test, which is both free and anonymous, involves the analysiS of a small sample of a patient's blood. According to Paulson, "Over half of the people we test are what we call 'worried-well heteros,' or students who practice safe sex but who are still careful with their health." Only about 25% of the people whom UHS tests are "high-risk" candidates for AIDS, a class which includes gay males and intravenous drug users. As for the number of people testing positive for HIV, Paulson states that "our latest figures show a positivity rate of 1.6%. That figure is mainly composed of ""

homosexual males and intravenous drug users, although one woman did test positive last fall." Paulson, however, points to the Ypsilanti AIDS testing center, which tests a larger number of people than the U-M clinic, and which has recorded a fair number of HIV positive women in addition to "high-risk" gays and intravenous drug users, as presenting a more accurate profile of people who are HIV positive. For people who test positive, UHS provides a number of secondary support services. "We offer one or two hours of counseling, during which we make sure that they are informed as to how to protect themselves and others from further exposure to the disease," said Paulson. During such sessions, HIV positive patients are given certain directions and health precautions, including the need to reduce stress in their lives, to eat a wellbalanced diet, and to abstain from drinking alcohol or using non-prescription drugs or nicotine. "We also refer students to secondary

Syracuse University, and Thomas Fleming, editor of Chronicles magazine, spoke in opposition to affirmative action. Thomas justified his opposition to affirmative action on the grounds that it is deeply infected by the disease of racism itself. Thomas additionally maintained the issue is not about affirmative action, but about racial preferences, and suggested blacks should stop looking to someone else (i.e. whites) for help, and begin to display a little more faith in themselves. Thomas concluded that unless whites recognize that non-verbal behavior, which he calls residual racism, does g;:ulke a difference, affirmative ac.ti6n '~ill perpetuate what it was designed to end. Thomas gave an example of residual racism from his visit to Israel, when a white woman grasped her purse extremely tight when he walked by. He was infuriated that this woman would think that he would travel 6000 miles specifically to steal this paranoid woman's purse. The best way to educate whites about residual racism according to Thomas, is "for whites to take an initiative to choose to make the world a better place." Fleming spoke last and remarked that affirmative action is not based on equality, but on racial oppression. He reiterated throughout his comments that

Please See Page 11

. -INSIDE Afrocentrism

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Interview: Thomas Fleming

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Cracker Barrel

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Crusty's Corner

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Please See Page 11

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

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December 4, 1991

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Serpent's Tooth Q: Why do the Kennedy men cry after

sex? A: The Mace.

Gasp ... Do the Northwestern Wildcats really play in Dyche Stadium? This is a shocking example of hetew;exism in collegiate sports. Actually, if the Wildcats were to play a few U-M activists (might we suggest members of the Drakes' 5?) at the "tight end" position, they might beat someone other than Michigan State.

James Watson earned a Nobel Prize in the 19508 for discovering DNA's doublehelix formation, but we're not sure what he's been up to since then. "A lot of people are victims of genetic injustice," said Watson at a U-M symposium on health care, according to the University Record. So genes are a right, and not a privilege?

Professor of English Bert Hornback rei

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Top Ten Postal Worker Excuses for Killing People

cently waxed nostalgic on the pages of the University Record. He recalled the utopia of North America circa 1491, a gleeful age: "Honest animals lived here then: animals neither artificially fattened like pigs and cattle, nor intentionally starved like vealers, nor bred in cages like electric chickens. And the people both respected them and used them." Hornback grimly (and eloquently) concluded, "I have looked carefully at what white Americans like me have done here - and it doesn't look to me like civilizaton." Hornback's ideal civilization apparently includes animals that don't tell lies and solar-powered chickens. We would certainly like to live there, but we can't help ~ but think Hornback is full of twaddle.

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The American Association of Univeristy Professors (MUP) implicitly endorsed historical revisionism with its "Statement on the Political Correctness Controversy." Political correctness, the AAUP enlightens us, does not, and never did exist. Baseless accusations of political correctness are the real source of evil on campuses across the country, says the AAUP, and they ''have a way of taking on their own coercive tone." Presumably, perpetuators of such vile coercion must be dealt with harshly.

10. Not enough vacation time. I

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9. Big '1'wo-for-One" ammo sale at K-Mart.

8. Trying to get part of Hannibal Leder in Siltnce of the Lambs II. 7. Federal Express. 6. The stress accompanying the life and death decisions that postal workers must face every day. ' 5. Tired of being stereotyped as moronic postal worker on "Cheers." 4. Humiliation from trying to pick up babes in mail jeep. 3. The Socialism Blues. 2. Sick of all the bitching about those damn 29 cent stamps. 1. Post office's soon-tcrbeapproved Mandatory Competence Policy. by Tory Rocca

Meanwhile, Lawrence Poston teaches English at the University of nlinois at Chicago and is a member of AAUP. In his intelligent commentary "On Trying t6 Be PC" in an AAUP publication, Poston notes "the Association has never taken sides on ideological grounds." The AAUP statement on PC, which was printed on the opposing page, touches upon the AAUP's "longstanding policy in support of affirmative action." Please tell us, who's being coercive now?

According to the National Review, feminist scientists endeavor to demonstrate male dominance at work in the idea of forces" acting on objects," in the description of evolution as a "struggle," in claiming "competition" as the condition of scarcity - and anything else that contradicts the way they think things ought to be. Hal And you thought the purpose of science was to explain reality, and that its validity derived from its ability to furnish correct predictions. Naw, that was the old science - the macho kind.

James Michener, the author of many

MICIDGAN REVIEW poorly written books, opines on personal responSibility in the economic realm: "The best money I have spent in my life was not that used to make me either happier or more comfortable [life must be tough, with all those best-sellers], but the taxes I have paid to the various governments under which I have lived [because you don't want to go to jail?]. In general, governments have spent their share of my money more wisely than I have spent my own funds." Michener says he is "most ashamed" to have lived in three states that have no income tax. He probably didn't think that he could have donated the money to charity or something. The problem, you see, is that most people are much smarter than Michener, and we know how to spend our cash.

Back in September, Review Executive Editor Adam DeVore had been scheduled to debate Sociology Professor To!Jl,,,,' Gerschick before his Sociology 102'Ciass on the topic of Political Correctness. DeVore had prepared an opportune introduction for his anti-PC speech (seeing as how Professor Gerschick had scheduled the debate for Yom Kippur). Hiding behind the lame excuse that he had rearranged the class syllabus, however, he pushed the date back to November 27. Gerschick recently planed again, this time backing out of the debate entirely. Unfortunately, he explained, he had fallen behind in his lecturing schedule, and was thus forced to cancel the debate. Despite DeVore's offer to schedule an after410urs debate, Tom "Craven Wimp" Gerschlck maintained that he had suggested that his students attend the PC conference, which would suffice to inform them about

"We are the Establishment"

The Campus Affairs Journal of the University of Michigan Editor-in-Chief""" ",."",Brian Jendryka Publisher."." ... "" ..... ,,,Karen S, Brinkman Executive EditoL" .. ".... ""Adam DeVore Executive Editor.. ." ..." ..."" ..", ,,,,Jeff Muir Contributing Editor.... "........ ,Jay McNeill Contributing EditoL ..... .David J, Powell Contributing EditoL ....... .5tacey Walker Assistant Editor.. ,.........Peter Daugavietis Assistant Editor".""."." "..... "Corey Hill Assistant Editor ...........Kishore Jayabalan Music Editor.. "",... ".. "" ......".Chris Peters Literary EditoL ....... ".".Adam Garagiola MTS Editor" ............. " ........ ".Doug Thiese Production Manager... "" ...""." .. Andrew Bockelman Production Manager.... "Tracy Robinson Business Manager.................Chet Zarko

Staff Eddie Amer, Ouis Bair, Mike Beidler, Ryan Boeskool, David Boettger, Mistes- Boffo, Kevin M. Bowen, Michele Brogley, Mark Burnstein, Ouis Qoutier, Joe Coletti, Brian Cook, Tim Darr, Keith Edwards, Athena Foley, Tony Ghecea, John Gnodtke, Jonathan R. Goodman, Chris Gutowski, Mike Hewitt, Nicholas Hoffman, Nate Jamison, Ken Johnston, Beth Martin, Kirsten McCanel, Peter Miskech. Bud Muncher, Crusty Munches-, Bill Murley, Mitch Rohde, David Rothbart, Brian Scheike, Michael Skinner, Dan Spillane, Jay Sprout, Kenneth w. Staley, Perry Thompson, Jim Waldecker, Tony Woodlief.

Pc.

Editor-at-Large,....." ... ,.. :.. ..John J. Miller Publisher Emeritus" ..".....Mark 0. Stem Editor Emeritus ... " ...... ".....Marc Selinger

The Daily recently announced that a new Diversity group had formed: the U-M Network for Cui t u ra I Democracy. Communictions Professor Richard Campbell eloquently described the group's goals: "Offensively, we're trying to encourage democratic reforms .on campus .. .Defensively, we will answer charges like, 'left wing thought police control campus,' ... '~ We at the Review are glad to see the PCers finally admitting that they are acting offensively. But defending? Not if you're in league with the Craven Wimp.

The Michigan Review is an independent, nonprofit, student-run journal at the University of Michigan. We are not affiliated with any political party, Unsigned editorials represent the opinion of the editorial board, Signed articles represent the opinions of the author and not necessarily those of the Review. We welcome letters and articles and encourage comments about the journal and issues discussed in it Our address is: Suite One 911 North University Avenue Ann Arbor, MI 48109-1265

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Decem ber 4, 1991

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW ~ ~

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Maurita Holland, Lecturer, School of Information and Library Science: A Parrot Without a Name: The Search for the Last Knoum Birds on Earth, by Don Stap.

Herbert Winful, Associate Professor, EECS: Chaos, by Jarn6 Gleick.

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Jan Gerson, Professor of Economics: Flatland, by Edwin Abbot.

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Rudi Thun, Professor of Physics: The Emperor's New Mind, by Roger Penrose. . •~ ".'('-

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Do you ...

Oppose speech bans? Support the teaching of classic literature? Abhor the politicization of the classroom? Feel the U-M/s leftists need to be challenged? If you answered lIyes" to any of these questions, support

The Michigan Review Bert Hornback, Professor of English: David Copperfield, by Charles Dickens.

Alfred A. Stuart, University Registrar: Poetry by Emily Dickenson or the biography of Winston Churchill by William Manchester.

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December 4, 1991

THE MICHIGAN REvIEW.

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From Suite One: Editorials

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Conservative Coalition's Continued Conquest While the Conservative Coalition (CC) did not receive any clear mandate in the recent Michigan Student Assembly (MSA) elections, the voters' decision to leave CC holding the same number of seats in MSA - 26, which is a majority - can be understood as a vote of confidence. Such an interpretation seems especially relevant in light of the Progressive Party's campaign, the foci of which were, first, accusing CC of having failed in its every endeavor, and second, promising to return MSA back into a vociferous (read: obnoxious) student government, much like what existed under the presidency of Jennifer Van Valey. But if CC is to strengthen its hold on MSA, it must quickly set and begin advancing an agenda that will protect and promote student interests. Perhaps the most immediate reform it should pursue is the creation of a 24-hour study center. First proclaimed a CC objective during last year's winter campaign, the creation of an around-the....clock study center would not only be of immediate utility to students, but it would also gain CC much needed recognition throughout the student population. Such an initiative is hardly a partisan issue, however. A more traditionally conservative initiative might seek to increase students' control over MSA by allowing them to control MSA's funding. While liberals might profess to favor promoting governmental accountability, democratic control, and individual liberty, MSA liberals recently blocked a proposal that would have promoted these laudable objectives. Earlier this term, M~"had the chance to give students the opportunity to amend MSA's constitution'So that the imposition of a'fI.y MSA fee, or any raising or lowering of that fee, would ha~~ to be approved by the student body in a general election. In other words, for MSA to continue extracting its $6.27 tax from each student each term, or for it to raiseur lower the fee, it would first have to get student approval in a general election. To pass such an amendment to its constitution, MSA would have to approve it by at least a two-thirds majority, in addition to receiving a majority of student votes in the next general election. Despite the proposed amendment's backing - the majority of the assembly supported it - MSA liberals successfully aborted the proposal while it was still in its fetal stage and prevented the voters from having the opportunity to control MSA through its purse strings. Rather than letting students decide whether MSA deserves its money, the liberals sought to strengthen MSA at the cost of students'

liberties. They of the vanguard know what is best for you. Yet the liberals' action should not be taken as evidence that MSA could not function without its entire present external budget, which for 1991-1992 totaled $467,390, of which $457,710 came from student fees. Evety student contributes $6.27 to that figure each term, an amount $50 less than in recent years past, thanks to cc. Of this $6.27, $4.27 is split between Student Legal Services (SIS) and the Ann Arbor Tenant's Union(AATU). SIS received $285,000 of MSA's external budget, the Ann Arbor Tenants' Union $26,940, and MSA itself a mere $155,450. With these statistics in mind, one can contemplate the possibility of moving MSA fees toward being voluntary. After finishing with CRISP, for instance, students could simply fill out a worksheet which asked them whether they each wished to donate $4.27 or some lesser amount, to SIS and the AATU. One immediate objection might be !hat vast numbers of uninformed students would choose not to fund AATU or SIS, only to realize later on, when in the throes of a legal crisis, that they should have funded these groups. Might many greedy students keep their $4.27 and bankrupt SLS and AATU? In the first place, such an assertion assumes that AATU and SIS need as much funding as they now receive. And more it importantly, if the concern that very few folks will feel like their money is being well spent by SIS or AATU is well grounded, then one must question whether everyone should be forced to support these organizations for the benefit of only a few. Does not the paranoia reflected in such gloom-and-doom predictions reveal that absent coercion, even the organization's organizers do not believe that people would freely support their group? If, on the whole, students are so unfamiliar with SIS and AATU that they choose not to fund them, then perhaps the problem does not lie with the students, but with the organizations. ~erhaps accountability to their supporters and the accompanying threat of revocation of funding would compel the AATU to begin focusing on student-tenant issues instead of its various radical agendas. Under the present system these groups have little incentive to effectively publicize their services; were their vitality dependent upon students actively choosing to fund them, the groups would be forced, at the very least, to make certain that students are aware of their existence and ostensible purpose.

ConSiderately Considering Consider Forums There can be no doubt that part of an enriching college experience is the education that occurs outside of the classroom. The opportunities afforded by the wide range of extra-curricular activities are nearly limitless at a university the size and caliber of the University of Michigan. But the quality of the extra-curricular events offered is not a given. Just as a free market responds to consumer demand, so too will university organizations when it comes to prOviding what students want. That is, organizations will respond to student attendance at events they sponsor. Yet for this dynamic to work, students must responsibly choose the events they attend by patronizing intellectually worthy programs. U-M students are often heard bemoaning the fact that guest lectures and panel discussions are blatantly one-sided. The typical guest speaker grinds his or her particular political axe, and the only debate that follows consists of a handful of student "questions" that more accurately resemble long-winded diatribes. The forum which presents an accurate and fair portrait of both sides of an issue is indeed a rarity at the U-M. A good example of the standard fare for guest lectures and forums would be the recent political correctness conference, which was funded, in part, with student tuition dollars. The panels typically contained four or five participants, and several of the panels actually had a single conservative representative. Considering the costs involved in such a production, it seems appropriate to express as many opinions on the subject as possible and to fully explore the stated topic. To focus instead on the apologist, left-Wing radical tendencies of academia is a slap in the face to free and open debate and does nothing to encourage student attendance and participation with future forums. Two groups attempted to present responsible debates last year: Consider magazine

offered a forum on pornography and the University Activities Center (UAC) sponsored the first ''Student Soapbox," which featured pro-life activist Phyllis Schlafly and pro-choice attorney Sarah Weddington. Both events were well attended and made significant contributions to the U-M. This year, Considers forum focused on affirmative action. Each of the four invited speakers argued from a different perspective, but the event's attendance was well below last year's, despite excellent publicity. U AC has not sponsored any new debates. While it has brought notable speakers like the Reverend Al Sharpton to campus, UAC has failed to balance the events out by presenting opposing speakers. It is unfortunate that the few avenues open to students seeking well-rounded, fair coverage of a relevant social or political issue have not enjoyed a more supportive student reception. The complaints of indoctrination and personal ideological axegrinding that accompanied the political correctness conference can only be combatted with increased student support for a more accurate intellectually-enhancing forum format. The lack of student support on so timely an issue as affirmative action should not discourage the organizers of future Consider or UAC forums. Several other events were scheduled for the evening of the forum, not least among them the opening of MUSKET's Evita. It is important, however, that students appreciate the opportunity Consider and other forums offer. A non-biased, weJ.h)rganized debate which encompasses both sides of an issue is a beneficial intellectual tool students should utilize. The rewards of such an extra-curricular experience far outweigh the indoctrination to which we have thus far been exposed. )

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

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Feminists ·S·e g,Whille·· .forMartial Law by Jeff Muir In reaction to several recent attacks against women, a feminist group at Brigham Young University in Utah has formally requested that school officials enact and enforce a 10 p.m. to 6a.m. curfew for campus men, according to a recent Associated Press story. The group, VOICE, is described as a committee to promote the status of women. I'm surprised that Julie Steiner, director of the University of Michigan'S Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center, hasn't already jumped on this bandwagon. As with most ideas that spring from the feminist mind, this one stinks. When

will these folks realize that enacting sexist, man-hating laws only serves to increase the tension betWeen the sexes? When will they realize that' making absurd proposals in response to serious issues has the effect of trivializing the important issues? Probably never. , As for the curfew proposal, I suppose that if the government were to lock everybody up in their homes, the crime rate would drop dramatically. But then, as the feminist mind would probably reason, the inci.~llts of wife-beat,/ mg would rise. The government would theJl need to separate the sexes. This,. however, would cause the birth rate to drop, and civilization would fall into an irreversible decline!

Of course, one might question just how effective a university rule, such as a curfew, would be as a deterrent against conupitting a felony. Let's take a journey into the mind of a psychotic rapist (that's psychotic, not psychological) ' to ~ gain further insight into this dilemma ...

"Gee, /think I'll go out to the Diag and violently rape and beat a poor, de- . fenseless feminist! That isa felony, and if I get caught, I'll undofbtedly be jai1edJor life ... oh, what the hell, I'm

pSychotic! But wait! 1ihere's that nasty, university mandated curfew! Well, I wouldn't want to break a university rule. I guess I'll stay home and read Betty Friedan books instead."

Letters to the Editor-Author Too Hard On SAPAC's Steiner Though I generally am impressed with the articles that appear in your paper I must disagree with Andrew Bockelman's article on the Sexual A~ sault Prevention Awareness Center (SAPAq of November 20,1991. He states that "'many of the positions taken by SAPAC in its educational mat~ rial suggest that the purpose of the organization is to uncover 'sexism' in our society, rather than promote awareness about sex crimes." I fail to see this as a political position ~ Bockelman does. The up" in SAPAC is for "prevention;" by uncovering sexism in society we may be able to understand why sexual assaults happen. Many reasons have been given for why people rape other people; not all of these reasons deal with sexism in society, but some do. For instance, sexism may play an important role in date rape and sexual harassment. Why should SAP AC limit itself to discussing only some aspects of sexual assault? As a representative body of the University of Michigan, I feel that it should do ~. that

is in its power to help eliminate the prolr Jem of sexual assault. I would agree thatJulie Steiner has used her title of director of SAP AC in ways that are not suitable, but this by no means should preclude her from speaking her mind about any issue, whether it

be Clarence Thomas' Supreme Court c0nfirmation, or Dooley's lingerie show. These opinions should not come from Julie Steiner, director of SAPAC, but from Julie Steiner, concerned woman. If I've learned anything at the University of Michigan; I've learned that a position of power allows anyone to use their authority as a soapbox for their personal views. Though Steiner is guilty of this offense, one must not condemn SAPAC or forget all at Steiner's hard work for the University community.

ThomaS Cook Ann Arbor

Review is Fascist In your November 20 issue, you stated that MSA President lames Green got Corey Dolgon to "quit shouting in public." Because of that action, you advocated re-christening Regent's Plaza in

his name.

The man responsible for Mr. DoIgon's resignation from MSA (aIld. hence for his new lower profile) was Serge Elnitsky, a graduate student in mathematics. Politically speaking, I am probably in agreement with Mr. Dolgon much more often than I am with Mr. Elnitsky. However, your refusal to ·re-christen 'Regent's Plaza in Serge's name reeks of Mathphobia and fascism. I will not rest until you send Serge Elnitsky an apology, and refer to "Regent's Plaza" as "Serge's Plaza." Douglas Shaw Rackham Graduate Student

Review Challenges Fascists As a loyal reader, I'd like to congratulate you on the tenth anniversary of your fine publication. It is good to know that your voice is still a strong one; challenging the fascists on the political left who would silence any dissenting opinion. Keep up the good work.

Marc 1. Whins<m Flushing, New York

Yeah, right. If these feminist authoritarians actually believe that anyone who would even consider raping would refrain from such a heinous crime simply because of a curfew, then they are even dumber than most oHhem look.' As far as anybody can tell, the manly-types at VOICE originally made their curfew proposal in complete seriousness. Now they are being laughed off of campus. So their leaders, like Tomi-Ann Roberts, are making co ntr ad icto ry statements such as "Of course it's absurd to restrict someone's freedom as a solution. We realized the administration would say ~po ttflhe curfew, but for the first time . people are realizing that BYU does have a problem." Before we resort to banning men from walking the streets at night, however, why don't we try arming women with mace? How about having them walking in groups of two or more? What about self-defense training? Perhaps the U-M administration ought to devote its manhours to expanding the Safewalk, Northwalk, and Nite Owl services, rather than formulating and implementing a stupid curfew. Feminists retort that since "men" as a group are the ones who generally rape women, it is not the fault of "women." Because it is not women's fault, they argue, women shouldn't be inconvenienced with having to take precautions against being raped. Finally, they reason that all men should be inconvenienced. After all, that's only fair. Excuse me, but a lot of things in this world aren't fair. It is not my fault that some perverted, mentally unstable men rape women. So, by the above feminist reasoning, to avoid inconveniencing ~ raping men, we should have curfews apply only to men who rape. This way, only the rapists would be kept off the streets, and the rest of us could live together in intra-sexual harmony! What a great ideal

Jeff ~uir is a senior in general studies and an executive editor for the Re-

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THE MICHt6ttN REVIEW'" " ~ , - .: ~

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December 4, 1991

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Essay: Egyptology

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Black Athena ChaUenges,Greek ,Origins by John J. Miller Martin Bernal dropped a bombshell on the classical world in 1987 with the publication of B/Qck Athena: The Afroasiatic Roots of Classical Civilization. His book declared that much of the ancient Egyptian population was racially black, that ancient Egypt had a much greater influence upon ancient Greece than had previously been recognized, and that racist historians have distorted the classics field for generations. As a result, we must now dramatically reassess the foundations of what we call Western civilization. Rutgers University Press recently released the second volume of a projected four, which has rekindled public interest in the questions raised by Bernal. Early last month, Bernal visited the University of Michigan in order to discuss aspects of his work with both scholars and students. Bernal posits two historical models that address the origins of Greece: the ancient and the Aryan. The ancient model derived itself largely from Herodotus

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and was widely held and taught until the early 19th century. The Aryan model , . supplanted the ancient model in the 1&30S for a variety of cultural reasons, most notably racism. The ancient Egyptians, Bernal claims, were strongly influenced by black Africans to their South, and a

think it's better to take your readers into your confidence and let them know where you're coming from." He is subsequently eager to deny allegations of relativism. '1 believe there is an objective something out there," said Bernal. "You may

The ancient Egyptians, Bernal claims, were strongly influenced by black Africans to their south, and a number of the pharaohs were themselves probably black. number of the pharaohs were themselves hot be able to reach the truth, but you can probably black. Furthennore, the Egy~ be nearer or further from it. It's the duty tians and Phoe9ipans conquered and-' of a scholar to get as near as possible to settled in Greece in the second millen.. it." nium, B.C. Historians of the 19th cenThe issue of Bernal's proximity to the tury, Bernal saYS/Wished not to taint the truth has caused something of a furor fountainhead of Western civilization with within Academia, as scholars reexamine these influences, so they constructed the their own suppositions in the light o~.. Aryan modeL which disregards these Black Athena. Responses have ranged frotfi a sort of hesitating acceptance to a bitter, facts and overemphasizes Hellenic polemical assault that borders on characculture's connections to an early indoter assassination. The American PhiloEuropean invasion. logical Association, for instance, consid"The ancient Egyptian population ered Bernal's work important enough to was not as homogeneous as the tomb warrant a preSidential panel at the paintings would have us realize," said organization's annual conference. MeanBernal. "It was in fact much more varied." while, David Gress asserted in the New Criterion that we cannot forget Bernal's Bernal argues that classicists should Stalinist father, to whom the first volume now adopt som~hing he calls the reof Black Athena is dedicated. "Bernal junvised ancient model, which would reior, ever the loyal red diaper baby, gloturn Greek historiography to an underries in this affiliation," wrote Gress. standing that Greece was influenced by its Mediterranean neighbors to a degree The issue of ancient Egypt's racial the Aryan model does not permit make-up has been one of widespread interest, and Bernal claims that some of Bernal fully realizes the implications the Egyptian dynasties "were made up his scholarship will have not only upon the politically charged academy, but also of pharaohs whom one can usefully call black." This usefulness might be misupon the larger off-campus political landscape. "The political purpose of Black leading, however. Frank M. Snowden of Athena is, of course, to lessen European Howard University, a leading authority cultural arrogance," he wrote in the first on race in antiquity, notes "there is in volume. classical sources no justification for equatQuestions of objectivity inevitably ing 'black,' as used in Herodotus or any arise, and one must wonder whether other Greek author, with peoples designated in classical texts as Ethiopians (i.e., Bernal allows an ideological dreamland to obscure a historical reality. Bernal atNegroes}." Many Egyptologists claim tempts in much of his first volume to that the ancient civilization was demonstrate how a belief in racial sumulticultural and that the imposition of premacy can color scholarship, but he fails to recognize that his own admitted agenda, despite its probable benignity, might obstruct his own efforts to discover the truth. '1 feel torn on this issue," said Bernal. liOn the one hand, you can say that the . _, .Rr~tense of ol?j~~vjty leads .to a m,or~ ad6M'6tijtktivity. (':)n tM btHer,hand; I

20th century American racial categories is inappropriate. These racial categories, however, seem crucial to the "political purpose" of Black Athena. "Blacks are being told that they have never had a great civilization of any sort, and it's implied that they never will," said Bernal in a recent interview with the Chronicle of Higher Education. As Gleaves Whitney, a U-M doctoral candidate in history, noted in a review of B[QCk Atluma, "Bernal is keen on making academically legitimate the view that Egyptian civilization equals African civilization equals black civilization. The implications of this theory are not opaque. If black Africa was the major influence on black Egypt, and black Egypt was an influence on Greece, then Greek thought - in Pythagoru,s, Plato, Aristotle, and all the rest - owes a heavy debt to black sources. Which in tum means that West, ..a'f\ thought in general owes a heavy debt to black sources." This is not an entirely new idea. George James authored Stolen Legacy in 1954 and accused Pythagorus, Plato, and Aristotle of plagiarizing from Egyptian sources. Indus Khamit Kush contends in What They Never Told You in History Class that both Judaism and Christianity have their roots in the Egyptian Mysteries. The political ramifications of these theories, were they proven true, could be enormous. They would also be confusing. They might propel fashionable educational theories of racial pride into the mainstream, and children might only learn about their own race, rather than a larger cultural heritage. Or it might finally defeat the deterministic notion that Western civilization belongs exclusively to the white man, that the race (or gender, class, etc.) of the first person who uttered a certain profound and important thought bears no relevance to the idea itself. If blacks played a leading role in the founding of Western civilization, then the arguments in favor of Afrocentric education as the last hope for otherwise hop~ less black urban youth might be substantially diminished. A second topic raised by Bernal, and subsequently challenged by scholars, concerns linguistics. Approximately onehalf of the ancient Greek vocabulary qm be traced to the Indo-European language family, which includes English, Latin, Sanskrit, and others. Like many IndoEuropean tongues, however, a large number 9.f PJ.~ Greek ~o,rds ~p'e,ar unrela~~ , to any other language. This can be due to

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December 4, 1991

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alterations in the vocabulary which linguists cannot accurately reconstruct, or a given word could possibly derive from a long-dead language indigenous to a regiQn befQre an Ind~European dialect displaced it. To account for the unaccounted portion of ancient Greek, Bernal has attempted to link the words with unknown linguistic histories to ancient Egyptian, which is a member of the Afro-Asiatic language family and not related to IndoEuropean. By conventional standards, this would call for a systematic approach that recognizes patterns of transformation across languages. Indo-European languages possess such a relationship, . which was first described by the Grimm brothers (of fairy tale fame) and named Grimm's Law. This approach, for example, notes that the Latin p often becomes the English f, and drops out entirely in Celtic. Thus, the Latin pater corresponds to the English father and the Celtic athair. Bernal, however, has not described such a methodology for his EgyptianGreek link. Instead, he relies upon loan words to establish a relationship between Greek and Egyptian. "Loans are messy," he admits, but they do exist. The Latin pater, for example, has been adopted almost wholesale into English as paternity. In order to maintain some sense of

consistency within his analYSis, Bernal has focused upon "semantic clusters." He compares Greek and Egyptian words that fall under a specific heading such as law or religion, notes similarities, and draws a linguistic connection. From such a connection, Bernal arrives at the name

7

THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

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of his series of books - Black Athena. He asserts through lmguistic interpretation that the Greek goddess of wisdom, " Athena," has her origins in ancient Egypt as "Nt." Michael Poliakoff, a professor of classics and chairman of the Department of Classics at Hillsdale College, writes that

as the principle.oÂŁ place value and the use of zero, rather than ethnic identification. To Bernal's credit, he has participated in the assessment of his work and has even asked individuals with more expertise in certain fields to critique his analysiS. Some scholars have complained, however, that Bernal is overly eager to

"If black Africa was the major influence on black Egypt, and black Egypt was an influence on Greece, then Greek thought ... owes a heavy debt to black sources." -Gleaves Whitney ~mal' s

technique is "based upon fanciful speculation on vaguely familiar sounds ... This methodology is completely unacceptable." As Bernal has said,~(i! funny thing about history is that wli will never know everything about the past;>~holarship is often a collection of educated guesses. We must, however, guard against the possibility of these educated guesses becoming political wishes. Bernal comes dangerously dose in Black Athena to denigrating the genuine cultural achievements of all people to a modern-day racial spoils system. The oftentimes tense

contemporary political atmosphere can cloud the fact that Greek culture is valuable not because white folks take pride in it, but because individuals like Pythagorus, Plato, and Aristotle were able to locate and disseminate essential truths. Likewise, our society's use of a Hindu-Arabic numeral system, instead of the different systems devised by the Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans, relies upon developments which make mathematical problems e<;lSier,to solve, such

make hi~ case and lacks the patience to allow sJ)Ccialists the time they need tQ investigate his many claims. .~ernal still has plans to publish the final two volumes of the series, which wiIrround out his scholarly views on the topic. Before then, however, a popularized version of Black Athena should appear in bookstores. No publication date has been scheduled, but Bernal will tum

57

over a completed manuscript to W.W. Norton and Company by next June, and his streamlined account might be available sometime in 1993. "Bernal needs to show his homework now, not build a popular support group," said Poliakoff. "He runs the danger of serving not as an objective scholar but a political demagogue." These are volatile times within the academy, and the nature of Bernal's work is too important to leave to contemporary political whims. Hopefully Black Athena will allow for an increasingly vigorous study of the relationships between the early Mediterranean civilizations. We must beware, however, of those who wish to claim victory at this early point in the debate, and the political purposes they might have in mind. John J. Miller is a senior in English and

editor-at-Iarge of the Review.

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THE MICHIGAN REvIEW..

8

Interview: Thomas Fleming

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December 4, 1991

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Fleming Chronicles Our Troubled Times On November 21, Adam DeVore and John J. Miller of the Review intetviewed Thomas Fleming. Fleming is the editor of Chronicles magazine, a monthly joUJlo nat based in Rockford, illinois. He has a Ph.D. in Greek and Latin from the University of North Carolina and he recently participated in Consider magazine's forum on a.ffirmative action.

REVIEW: What are the problems with aft5DnAtive action today? FLEMING: There are several problems. It's essentially unjust. You're asking a few people to pay for the collective conscience of the Untted States. If we owe things to any specific minority group, that's fine, and we owe it as a people. Some poor joker working in a steel mill or trying to get into medical school may be from a family that got off the boat in 1935. A lot of the infonnation you get about what's going on is not honest. The US. Department of Labor, for example, is race-norming its aptitude tests, meaning only people of the same race are compared with each other. If a white man gets a raw score of 70 and a black man gets a raw score of 40, the way this is reported to the company, the black has the higher score. That's simply not honest. Obviously there's a bad conscience in affinnatiV'e action or there wouldn't be so many li~told about what we're doing. It means worse and worse people are promoted to higher and higher levels of management in government, business, and education. Our educational system is going down the drain right now, even as we speak. It gets measurably worse every five years. What I learned as a high school kid, people today are lucky to know when they get out of college. The average university professor today does not know, in the way of general information, what an undergraduate knew 30 years ago. The standards are sliding, but not in Japan or Germany. We're involved in a tremendous international competition with those countries - a competition perhaps more fierce than the one we had with them in the 1940s. What are we doing? We're promoting incompetence to the highest levels in the name of social justice. We're not going to remain a competitive nation if that goes on. It's a hard thing to say as someone who has supported Republican conservatives, but Clarence Thomas is the epitome of affinnative action: a not very

see polls where a large number of blacks don't approve of affirmative action. They don't approve of it because of what it implies, which is that they are too lazy or stupid to get jobs on their own. It's insulting. Obviously, society has some kind of collective responsibility, and you try to do the best you can, but what we have now is a system that confers a benefit upon minorities as much as it confers a benefit upon white-collar workers in a bureaucracy: the civil rights lawyers, the people working for the Equal EmployREVIEW: You suggested that if we inment Opportunity Commission. These deed owe compensation to the historiare the guys who get fat off affirmative cally oppressed, then we owe it as a action, not black people. This is true of society. But how can society respond every piece of civil rights legislation in . without hurting guiltless individuals? ~ the country. It gives further power to a bureaucratic elite. What I can't underFLEMING: The first thing to remember stand is why so-called leftists who will is an old principle of Hippocratic medicine, which is "Do no hann." When you're say they're against the system don't understand it. The language is so inverted making a social policy, the first thing you must do is make sure the policy does no . that the people who are defending the little guy wind up looking like white harm. And while it can be argued that affirmative action has helped some bla,ck.""'-capitalist oppressors, when the opposite is true. people, it is also very obvious that 'the policies bound up with affirmative acREVIEW: What about the gap between tion have hurt a great many black people. The verdict is not in as to whether it has real rights and special rights, or the notion that we are not lifting people up done more harm than good. to equal level but granting new priviSecondly, the principle of equity towards the individual has to come into leges to a select few? play. If we decide that we owe something to the descendents of slaves - and I FLEMING: What's going on is that a don't happen to think that we do - then very powerful interest group, namely we should raise taxes and create special the Congress, members of the permanent government, and the bureaucracy programs which we all collectively pay on?" I said that I was going to be speakfor, and not tell some steel worker, "I'm in the executive branch, is using blacks ing against it, and he said "Good for you. sorry, you're out of a job, even though and Hispanics. One of the reasons they Somebody has got to stop this nonsense." you're a Pole whose family came here 20 are so wild about immigration is because Now that's what you'll hear from any years ago, but as a minority group you they want to import social problems into lower-middle class person in the United don't make it under the current law." the United States so they can call for an States. That's why David Duke's followMy wife and I were talking about affinnative solution which will increase ing is growing every day. These people affirmative action the other day. She has the size of the government. I used to are very frustrated and they are very some Blackfoot Indian blood in her. We think that this was accidental, and like unhappy. Affirmative action is a recipe were wondering if we shouldn't classify the neoconservatives, I spoke of the unfor ethnic conflict. our children as Native Americans. Think intended consequences of legislation. about all the advantages they could reThere is nothing unintended about this REVIEW: What should we have in the ceive. It's interesting that the Native at all; they understand it very well. place of affirmative action? American population in the United States What every group Seeks to do is increase is growing very rapidly as people come its own wealth and power. You don't FLEMING: We could try to let the old out of the closet who are one-tenth or have to be an economist to understand merit principle work. We could try getone-twentieth Indian and they realize that. Therefore, the permanent governting the government out of it. If private what's at stake. What we're headed for is ment of the United States seeks to incompanies want to have affinnative aca society like Brazil in the 19th century crease its wealth, power, and privileges tion, that's fine. If it makes them less with careful gradations of race: are you by using underprivileged groups as a competitive and they gradually lose out, one-sixteenth, one-eighth, or one-fourth spearhead. then they have to pay the price. I'm not a member of this group? Except this is What this means is that we are artifiopposed to cities and states passing such going to be in reverse; the blacker you are cially creating a certain kind of black laws, but you've got 250 million people the more social priVileges you get. The middle class, but these are not members in this country and they cannot be ruled net effect is to create enonnous hostility of the old black middle class of entrepreby some central bureaucracy in the Soagainst black people, enormous resentneurs who made it on their own. These viet style. The Soviets have learned their ment in the working place, and now you are people like Clarence Thomas, who

qualified applicant, no experience, mediocre ability, and dubious morality. If he's going to sit on the Supreme Court, multiply that by a million, arld,you have the leadership class of the United States. Going head-t<rhead with the Gennans is laughable with the kinds of leaders we're producing. The worst thing about affirmative action is that it's going to cause a race war in the United States. The average bluecollar worker is increasingly frustrated. Riding into Ann Arbor on the bus today, the driver asked me, "Why are you coming into this crazy town?" I said that I was going to talk about affirmative action. The driver asked, "What side are you

lesson, and it is that you must decentralize the system if you are going to make it work. Apparently we won't wise up until we're as badly off as they are, and then the whole thing will start breaking down. Deregulate, deconsolidate, decentralize and bring the power back to the people who can properly handle it, namely individuals, businesses, and local governments. If they .have a felt need, then they'll act upon it. If there isn't a felt need, then they won't.

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December 4, 1991

THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

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are pampered and never allowed to de- , velop themselves. Some of these people might be great, but we'll never get the chance to know because they have not had the opportunity to grow as human beings or lawyers because they have been given too much too soon. Meanwhile, there are really able black people who are working their way up on their own merits and they are building up more and more resentment because a lot of these white lawyers, white doctors, and white university professors look over at a black colleague and say "Yeah, I know how he got here." In some cases it's true, in other cases it's not true. But the overall effect is resentment on both sides, and that's very unhealthy. 1grew up and spent a lot of my life in the rural South, and I'll tell you that among teenagers, race relations were not great and were not ideal, but there was not the poisonous hostility that 1 see among a lot of teenagers today. Is this what our social justice policies are leading to? It's something we have to reflect upon. REVIEW: Some proponents of affirmative action claim that we need government programs in order to help the historically slighted "'little guy," but several minority authors argue that such a mentality is paternalistic. FLEMING: The original claim is based upon the notion that you can design a society to compel people to be virtuous. The minute that you start desigrung other people's lives, they lose their autonomy and become less human. It's also an extremely arrogant assumption. I don't assume that I know how other people should live. I assume that each man ultimately has to be the judge of his own conduct, he has to justify himself to his Creator someday, he has to raise his own children, and if I tell him how to do it, then it's my family, not his family. There's a real smugness about all thi~ social policy that should be intolerable to the recipients of paternalist welfare. REVIEW: You've been a critic of the contemporary environmental movement What are your primary objections? FLEMING: There's no question that we· have an environmental problem, and the chief environmental problem is not so much pollution of the air, water, or soil, but the gradual alienation of human beings from their natural surroundings. Man taken out of nature gets crazier and crazier. The average suburbanite who has never hunted, killed, or grown anything, can get sentimental about a nature he's had no contact with and join the

Sierra Oub. The pro~lem :mth mu~h of the enVironm~ntalmOVeJhent is that it springs from this alienation and it reinforces it. It is not only politically coerove, but it's anti-human. Man becomes the only problem; we are somehow outside the natural universe and everything would be great if it weren't for man, especially Western man. It's really a movement aimed at subverting everything decent in our civilization and human history. Why isn't there a conservative environmentalism? This is one of the great tragedies; conserving natural resources and preserving the heritage handed down to us from our ancestors should be a primary consideration for conservatives. But it's not. The lines have been drawn the wrong way; environmentalism is not a left-right issue. There should be a conservative environmentalism aimed at preserving a healthy humanity, not just physically, but morally, spiritually, culturally, and to do that requires a certain in the raw. amount of contact witlY6a'ture ," REVIEW: Could you briefly describe some of the different camps that operate under the rubric of conservatism? FLEMING: I'm beginning to think that the last chapter of the conservative movement was written sometime in the 1980s. It was a coalition of various groups that not only fell apart, but sort of self-destructed. There have always been the libertarians, who have been very good on economic issues, but not so good on anything else, although there are some sensible libertarians, and Chronicles frequently publishes their material . The line now seems to be drawn not so much between neoconservative and paleoconservative and all these different kinds of labels, but between those who think you can use government positively to solve human problems and those who know that you cannot, and that the attempt to use government to save the family, to promote social justice, or to promote equality or liberty will fail. The government can only negatively guarantee your liberty. It can only say you can't be messed with. If the government tries to pOSitively guarantee anything it becomes coercive. This is what the old right always understood and then managed to forget once they elected a president. That is one of the reasons why the neoconservatives, who are rather odious little people, were able to take over. The mainstream conservative movement said "Government was bad when the Democrats controlled it. Now that we have a chance to get our friends in power, now that Bill Bennett can be Secretary of Education, that makes the Department of

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Education good, doesn't it?" Multiply .13enrielt one h.uildred times and you've ..got the conservative movement. Times are changing, though. What I've just described is largely the elite of the conservative movement, the people who run think-tanks and magazines. The average person in the heartland still believes what people more or less believed 2S years ago, that government is the source of our problems and that if we take the constricting hand of government out of people's lives, then we can begin to restore some health, balance, and sanity to our lives. REVIEW: Why have the people in the heartland elected who they have? FLEMING: Stupidity. They believe what they are told. I talk to people and ask them if they really believe what George Bush !llys or what Reagan said in his second tenn. The answer is always, "1 don't know, what's the choice?" One of thS problems is the two-party system. I think frankly we need lots of parties in this country so that people can feel they are voting for something they believe in rather than the lesser of two evils. Bush versus Dukakis? Who cares? Who can vote in an election like that? Sure, Dukakis was a nightmare, but after four years of Dukakis, we would have been ready for a conservative revolution. Four years of Bush, and we're hardly much better off than we would have been under Dukakis. Yesterday Bush declared victory over the recession. Has he been in America recently? That's where the Democrats are going to run a great campaign: Bush doesn' t care about domestic policy. He only cares about being a hot shot in the history books and foreign policy is all that matters to him. It's like we had Henry Kissinger as president. REVIEW: Would you comment on the need for universities to focus on classics? FLEMING: The people who gave us the American Revolution and the Constitution all had the same education. It was not in sociology, driver's education, or English literature. It was in Greek, Latin, and mathematics. Everybody was expected to read the English classics - you read all that stuff at home, you felt compelled to read the Bible and a lot of history. But the core of the curriculum was classics and mathematics. It produced Thomas Jefferson, John C. Calhoun, and every important writer in our history. It has a tradition going back to 800 B.C. if we don't even take it back to Mycenae. All of a sudden, around the time of the First World War, we knew better and

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kicked out all the classics requirements in the universities, starting with Harvard. All bad things start at Harvard - that should have been a clue. By the 19305 and 1940s, most schools had given up their Latin and Greek requirements. It used to be that even to get into a university you needed a sound command of Latin and some Greek, much less what you studied when you got there. It's interesting that the 20th century has shown a gradual withdrawal from classics, and many other things, such as the principle of limited government. Where did the Founding Fathers learn that? Did they make it up? No, they learned it from reading Livy, Herodotus, and Virgil. REVIEW: What one book would you recommend that undergraduates read over Chrisbnas break? FLEMING: Cicero's On Duties. REVIEW: Can they read it in English? FLEMING: Sure. YQu know, another good book, one that I think most changed the imagination of young people in the Unit,~States and made it perhaps posS'ible to talk sanity to them, is J.R.R. Tolkein's Lord of the Rings. If I had to pick the most conservative book of the century, and the book that influenced most people to get their heads straight, it's the Lord of the Rings. It's not the best written novel I've ever read', it's got a lot wrong with it, but it's probably the most deeply reactionary book of the century. It shows how a society is supposed to work and how it worked maybe 500 years ago. It shows a society with different social classes that owe each other different rights and duties. It's a society with good and evil, and the good comes from an ultimate principle of good, and the evil is an aggressive and defective principle. It shows a war and how people respond and sell out. It shows essentially that the pursuit of power in the name of goodness will always be destructive and play into the hands of evil. This is something that I've tried to explain to my conservative friends. You see, the whole thing is about who controls the ring of power, and the argument goes, "Gee, if the good guys control the ring of power, then it will be used for good, right?" Wrong. The evil of despotic power is evil no matter who controls it. If you can't learn any other message from that book, you can learn this one. I would firmly recommend it for anybody who has not read it, and it's great Christmastime reading.

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

10

Esssy: Hudson's and the UAW

December 4, 1991

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Slovenly Commies Invade the Malls by Andrew Bockelman The day after Thanksgiving is traditionally the busiest shopping day of the year. The annual spending binge of the holiday season begins as shoppers flock to stores to take advantage of pre-holiday sales. This year, a new breed appeared at stores across the state - not with the intent to purchase, but to protest. Anyone deciding to shop at Hudson's this holiday season will probably be accosted by members of the United Auto Workers (UA W), which is claiming that the major department store does not treat its employees properly. They hope to divert potential shoppers from the store by distributing pro-union propaganda and shopping bags with the slogan" Anyplace But Hudson's." The UAW's main goal, oddly enough, is for the unionization of Hudson's employees. The issue itself began when a majority of employees at Hudson's Westland store decided in May of 1990 to form a union. The fact that Hudson's management has not acted on this request has prompted the protest, as the UAW apparently believes that Hudson's will not nt'gotiate on the issue, and is therefore acting unfairly towards its employees. Although the entire issue centers on the incident at the Westland store" the UAW is targeting Hudson's stores across the state in its anti- Hudson's earnpaign, ignoring the fact that employees at two other Hudson's stores recently rejected unionization. Judging by the size of the crowds at Hudson's stores over the weekend, the protestors were haVing little effect. In fact, according to one Hudson's employee, sales were up drastically from the previous year. . Those who shopped at Hudson's over the holiday weekend were able to view the conflict in action. Hudson's obviously handled the si~uation much more tactfully than the UAW. While Hudson's management may have an obligation to concede discussion to employees who desire to discuss the possibility of unionization, the obvious irrelevance of unions to the HudSQJl's orga-

nization only became more apparent through the events of the past weekend. If Appearance Suggests Anything If appearance conveys any truth, the UAW cannot be taken seriously: Protestors dressed and conducted themselves in a pathetic manner, portraying themselves as tactless at best. Hudson's, on the other hand, had strategically stationed customer service representatives inside the store to distribute standard Hudson's shopping bags and to answer questions. The contrast was most evident at Hudson's Saginaw store. The UA W representative stationed outside the store was wearing ragged jeans and an untucked t-shirt which accentuated his large gut. Needless to say, his hygiene habits seemed not to include the use of a brush or a razor. He said nothing to the passersby, simply thrusting bags. of propagangK in their faces. On t~ other hand,the Hudson's employee who greeted shoppe~side the store wore a dress suit. Her hair was neatly styled, and she looked well~groomed. She smiled and greeted people as they entered the store, and only gave bags to those who desired them. Similar behav-

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Some would still argue that unions are a Hudson's employees were treated imbenefit to laborers because they provide properly. The letter, written by 171 embenefits that might otherwise not be obployees of the Saginaw Hudson's stOTe, tained, such as retirement and savings began by denying any mistreatment on the job. According to the letter, "We are plans. This argument does not hold true in this case, since Hudson's already are not unhappy or mistreated. Hudson's accomodates their employees with benoffers the best benefit package of the efits, as the letter in The Saginaw News retail industry. We have the option to demonstrated. increase our own pay and receive sales The UAW's attempt to promote bonus incentives, as well as to join a unionization of all Hudson's employees stock option savings plan. We have a is hardly a legitimate cause, and an altoretirement plan and enjoy a generous gether unfeasible idea It is intellectually employee discount." unfair to assume that unionization is a Furthermore, the letter stated that popular idea among all Hudson's emthe majority of the employees at the ployees. It could quite pOSSibly do them Saginaw Hudson's store have excellent more harm than good. Perhaps the UA W management, and have no desire for should pack up their propaganda bags, . union representation, since they believe let Hudson's conduct normal business, ,."every individual has the right to choose what is right for their circumstances." and let everyone shop in peace. Consequences of Unionization Andrew Bockelman is a freshman in An appeal to economic theory might prove that unionization is less efficient LSA and a pro,duction manager for the Review. He spent thousands of dollars than competitive labor; therefore, unions are not the best thing for Hudson's. Supat Hudson's last weekend. pose Hudson's did unionize. The pri- ~ .~,. .... mary dilemma of .any union is hig~i wages versus higher employment. Hudson's, like all firms, has only so much money that it can spend on labor, and it will only hire what it can afford. If the union successfully obtains an increase in wages for laborers, the cost of paying for labor would increase and Hudson's would probably not be able to afford as many laborers. The union must then choose to accept either lower wages, so more people can be employed, or higher wages, with fewer workers. The union can set higher wages and still manage to keep people employed, but only by limiting the size of the labor force to the point that fewer people are seeking work. The problem with this is that if the current supply of labor for Hudson's and the rest of the retail industry is set, the only way to decrease that supply is to eliminate people from that labor market and to stop hiring. Given the current state of o.ur recession-ridden economy, one cannot necessarily assume that the people whose jobs were eliminated (for the good of the union, remember) will find employment in another industry.

]OINorDIE ior was also observed at Hudson's Ann Arbor store. Obviously, the organization concerned with making a good impression is Hudson's, and judging by the information at hand, one would have to assume that the organization not taking care of its employees' needs is the UAW. In effect, the UA W' s behavior suggested that Hudson's employees would also look like tactless slobs if they did form a union. Happiness at Hudson's A letter to the editor in the November 28 issue of The Saginaw News, entitled "Hudson's employees happy and proud," dispelled the myth that all


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December 4, 1991

Essay: Of Food and Politics

THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

11

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TheCracke'i!:;Barrel Controversy by Corey Hill Despite a sluggish economy and persisting controversy over their hiring policies, Cracker Barrel Old Country Stores continue to be profitable. A variety of grass-roots activist groups have recently accused Cracker Barrel of homophobia and have sponsored weekly protests every Sunday in Belleville, Michigan, the home of the only Cracker Barrel in Michigan. Controversy always increases curiosity, so I visited a Cracker Barrel in pursuit of protesters and a good meal. Not to be confused with Kraft's "Cracker Barrel" cheese products, Cracker Barrel stores attracted attention when they allegedly decided to enhance their stores' traditional family atmosphere. To effect this change, they fired all of their openly gay confirmed employees or any employee that the management suspected was gay. Some of the Belleville protesters alleged that Cracker Barrel fired apprOXimately twelve gay and lesbian employees as a result of the

"family image" policy. I questioned a cashier about this at the Fishers, Indiana, store arid she stated the "traditional family atrriosphere policy" no longer existed. I posed the same question to the store manager, who strongly denied that Cracker Barrel had ever engaged in such dubious and discriminatory practices. The corporate headquarters in Leb"anon, T ertnessee, supported the Fishers store manager's statement. The protestS piqued my interest to dine there. My visit was initially began as a joke, although my hunger was too great to ignore. Before you enter Cracker Barrel's dining room, there is a memorabilia store for the "shop-aholic" types. The store is filled with a plethora of handicrafts, hand-blown glassware, children's toys, cast iron cookware, and .pther homey souvenirs, inc1uding "Cracker Barrel recipe books, a map of al!..their store locations, and the official Redneck Handbook.

If the line ahead of you seems unusuexcellent, but my blood pressure and ally long, you can munch on a variety of cholesterol level may have risen slightly homestyle $pice-scented candies and from the salt and saturated fat found in aged cheese. You can even take home . many of their foods. So if you are awake some free cheese if you can cut a slice of early Sunday morning and Angelo's is extremely busy, drive a little further east cheese imd correctly guess its weight. But beware: losers of the cheese contest to Cracker Barrel. I recommend the bismust pay for the portion they cut. . . euits w·i th h~ or you 'tan just'Join the After passing through the memoraprotest (after you go to church). bilia gallery, you are able to enter the The Review's ratings (out of 4 stars) rustic dining room where Cracker Barrel's traditional country meals are served. The Food:**** menu is cornucopia of some all-time Service:*** country favorites: smoked house cured Memorabilia Store: **** ham, dumplings, and country fried steak. Dining Atmosphere:*** For the finicky eater, hamburgers and Price: *** french fries are still on the menu. CracKer Barrel also takes a cue from Denny'~t serves breakfast all day. Real Corey Hill is a sophomore in political science and an assistant editor of the buttemUlk pancakes, biscuitS and honey, Review. He loves to eat at the Halfass, and grits are legitimate dinner possibililocated in the basement of East Quad. ties.1\fter a hearty portion of Cracker Barrel's country fare, good luck trying to stuff down some homemade cobbler. The overall quality of the food was ,....

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Affirmative Action Ccmtinued from Page 1 now is the time to address affirmative action. According to Fleming the "merit principle" is the only proven method to achieve equality and respect. Fleming gave two examples of how affirmative action undercuts the pursuit of equality based on merit. He first cited some residents of Atlanta, Georgia who want to expand the Gifted Students Program admission criteria, which currently

considers only the applicant's academic qualifications, to include athletic ability and street knowledge. Fleming reasons that the intention of the Gifted Student Program is to highlight exceptional academic ability, not athletic ability. Superior athletic ability does have an outlet, namely teams and clubs. Fleming's second example was well received by an audience that otherwise booed, hissed, and jeered throughout his presentation. He suggested that Clarence

Thomas' nomination to the Supreme Court was a clear case of defacto affirmative action, and ignored the merit principle which propelled Thurgood Marshall throughout his career and rightfully placed him on the Supreme Court. After the panelists spoke for 20 minutes apiece, each was given a brief opportunity to respond to opposing views which necessitated immediate comment. Then, after a brief intermission, the panelists were asked to respond to questions

from the audience. The audience's questions often provoked emotionally charged and controversial debate. Although much of the campus missed this opportunity to participate in this open debate, it appears that there is no lack of interest to debateaffirmative action at the U-M.

available to see students, and non-students can visit a number of community doctors or the Infectious Disease Clinic at the U-M Hospital." Paulson also refers patients to the Wellness Networks of Huron Valley,

which "offer a variety of support groups for HN-positive individuals, AIDS patients, and their families and friends," she said. Quality AIDS testing services clearly exist. All that remains is for the public to

make full use of them. That wilL of course, require education, and Magic Johnson has said that he plans to help educate the American public on how to combat the spread of AIDS. Johnson recently accepted a position on the National Commission on AIDS, whose chair is Dr. June E. Osborn, dean of the University of Michigan's School of Public Health. This should be just the beginning of Magic's contribution to the fight against AIDS. As Paulson anticipated. "when Magic makes speeches and remains in the public spotlight, we hope to see new increases in the number of people coming in to be tested."

Corey Hill is a sophomore in political science and an assistant editor of the

Review.

AIDS Ccmtinued from Page 1 health care professionals who can provide them with medical care and psychosocial services," added Paulson. "We have two physicians on staff who are

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

12

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Wiseman Discusses Hockey at Michigan Earlier this fall, Corey Hill of the Review interviewed U-M hockey standout Brian Wiseman. Last season Wiseman was voted the CCHA's &eshman player of the year. WlSeDWl is a sophomore in kinesology and hails froms Chatham, Ontario.

expect the fan support to be better than it was last year, because the expectations of the team are higher this year and we will come through. When you have 8000 screaming fans behind you, it gets you really pumped and ready to go out on the ice to give it your best on every shift.

REVIEW: Were you surprised by your perforDlancela.stseason?

REVIEW: Were you surprised by this season's record ticket demand?

WISEMAN: I did not expect to come in last year and have the year that I did. Playing with a great bunch of guys, you cannot help but put good numbers up on the board.

WISEMAN: I did not expect the demand to be that extreme. I felt there would be some increase, but not that dramatic. The

REVIEW: What teams do you consider to be the U-M team's toughest challengers for this season's CCHA title?

WISEMAN: This year it is hard to say. A lot of tean\.'llost a lot of players except for ourselves. Any team in the league will be very tough on any given night. Lake Superior State and Bowling Green could be some our toughest matchups this season. REVIEW: How tough do you think Michigan State will be this year? WISEMAN: From what I have heard, they have had quite a few problems on and off the ice. They will always be tough against Michigan no matter if it is football, ~tNll, or hockey. They lost aJot of guys and {ve did not lQ6e as many, so I think their loss will help us take four points this year instead of the three points we took last year. REVIEW: Wha.t is your assessment of this years recruiting class?

demand was a big'surprise,but I guess people are catching on to hockey here at Michigan. It is not just a football or brur ketball-oriented school.

REVIEW: What did you ~ about the season ticket distribution policy?

WISEMAN: We've got a bunch of big guys, they are all six-iooters. They have a lot of talent and I imagine that they will all play. 1think the coach's main concern was to recruit some big players so that the team would be a force on the ice. We don't want anyone to come into our barn and run us around. We did not get run around last year, but with 7 six-footers, it will be tough for teams to run us around.

REVIEW: How much of a factor was the aowd during the games last season? WISEMAN: The crowd was good. We

have great fan support, I guess much more than we have had in previous seasons. I think the crowds had a lot of influence on our success l~ season. I

WISEMAN: I think it was a great idea. What they did obviously worked. I hope it continues and we get all the fan support we deserve. REVIEW: How much do you think hockey has caught on this campus? WISafAN: Judging from the last season, [think hockey has caught on quite a bit. In the late 1960s, Michigan was a hockey pow~rhouse winning national championships. After those years, they have not done so wen. This is Red Bererisoit's eighth year as coach and last year w~ one of his biggest seasons. I hope his ninth season is just as big. The fans - and . , all . the students around are catch~

ing on and taking,an interest in hockey. REVIEW: Some peqple might suggest that since basketball eXperienced an offseason last year, hockey received more attention than usual. Do , you think hockey can compete with a fairly competitive basketb.ul ,team? WISEMAN: I think hockey is an exciting game and people want to see it. They are coming to see some exciting action, some hard hitting, and some prolific goal scoring. I think our team can produce all of that for the fans. Because basketball has a major recruiting class coming in, they will obviously get the fans. I think basketball will not hurt our attendance or the interests of the University for our sport.

WISEMAN: I would say that theY've got all it wrong. There is obviously some violence in any sport you play. A lot of people say hockey is more violent, because you are allowed to play more physical-it is part of the game. In some instances, the violence does get out of hand, the brawls and stick penalties. It is all part of the game. I think the people who say hockey is mostly violence, they do not appreciate the game for what it is. They do not know what hockey is about, the competitiveness and the excitement throughout the game. 1think if they understood that, they would have a different perspective on the game. REVIEW: Do you think the fighting penalties should be more stiff, as they are in the NHL?

WISEMAN: I think the penalties in the CCHA are stiff enough. I think if you are caught fighting, you get a game suspension. The next time you are caught fightREVIEW: What J?~ ,,,,,'" ing, the penalty doubles. A lot of other leagues, you can get two fights a game sonal goals w~uld and you do not have to sit out the next you like to accom~ame. I think college hockey is not all plish this season? about fighting and brawling. I think the WISEMAN: I have to rules are there to prevent that from hapimprove my defensive pening, but occasionally it d9E!S happen. skills. I would like to be in the plus range REVIEW: What are your interests out(plus/minus ratings) side of hockey? all season. I would like to score more for the tearn than I did last WISEMAN: I enjoy a variety of sports. year. Basketball was one of my favorite sports when I was growing up. The height facREVIEW: What did you learn from the tor had a little bit to do with me not last season's loss to Boston University pursuing it as a main interest I like to in the NCAA playoffs? read, listen to music, and enjoy time to myself. WISEMAN: It was a tough loss. We went in there and had our hopes up that we REVIEW: Why did you decide to come would win. I do not think we played weD to Michigan? enough to win. They played very well. I think we were looking too far ahead, the WISEMAN: Coming to Michigan was Final Four was creeping up on us too dream for me when I was a kid. I have quick. We did not stay focused for that always heard about Michigan football, series and you cannot do that in this basketbalt I heard about h~ey once I . league. was beiitg recniited bY different schools. It is not just the playoffs, you cannot There is a lot of tradition here and I just look ahead to the next game or series. On want to be a part of it I want to be a part any given night, any team can beat you. of Red BerensOn's uprising, in his college It could have happened to Boston, they coaching to bring a national title back to MiChigan. could have been looking on forward, and we could have beat them in two straight Unfortunately, it did not work out that way. REVIEW: What you say to those people who see only hockey as a violent sport? ~'i-:

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

December 4 t 1991

13

Satire

Write Your Resume the Review Way by Brian Jendryka Ahh, December. The month of Christ-

mas, Hanukkah, and the Mazda/ Gatorade/ Family Circus/ Ed McMahon/ Evian-sponsored Liberty Bowl. The month where disposable income is low, stress is high, and college students head home for the holidays, where they are inevitably asked the question: "What are you going to do after college?" The answer they are looking for, of course, is "get a job," preferably one with a salary. And whether you are looking for temporary work this winter, an internship this summer, or (gasp) a real job, you will need to make a resume, and you will need to do it soon. It's the perfect time, what with ThanksgiVing out of the way and only minor distractions like term papers and final exams to worry about. Sure, it's a pain to do, but with minimal guidance, writing resumes can be a fairly painless process. Luckily, we here at the Reme'w are more than happy to offer minimal guidance on any subject, including resumes. From little things like using the bullet (.) and boldface (which tells your prospective employer "I am not a technological nimrod.") to big things like "resume words" (no, not diversity or multi-cultural, those are "administration words"), the resume is a complex critter. Here are just a few suggestions that should help put yoy a few steps ahead of Jeff Muir in applyiRg for your next job. -Vocabulary: The most important aspect of a good resume is the use of sexist language and "resume words." A resume word is basically a polysyllabic synonym for a regular word. When writing your resume, "hard" becomes" challenging," "using" becomes "utilizing" and "gopherll becomes "administrative assistant." Some polysYUabic words have no English equivalents and are made up solely for resumes: "interpersonal" and "intrapersonal" are two examples. Duderstadt is another. - Experience: This is of monumental (not big, monumental) importance to an exceptional (not good, exceptional) resume. If you are a senior trying to get a real job (read: no polyester uniform), this is where you must demonstrate that your internship at the Buster Brown Shoelace Factory is sufficient experience for a job at IBM. If you are an undercla%man looking for summer work, this is where you must justify that your job as a paperboy is sufficient experience for an internship at the Buster Brown Shoelace Factory.

This is one place where "resume words" playa pivotal role. With a little rewording, every job can be important. For example, delivered papers" can easily become "Distributed, in an accurate and timely manner, local product to more than 50 consumers daily." Even menial jobs can become meaningful. For example, "regional vegetable dispatcher for Fortune 500 company" is an excellent way to describe your job cooking McDonald's french fries. If

but you can use this to your advantage. Proportionally, a 2.4/4.0 GPA is a 3.6 GPA on a 6 point scale. Instead of listing your GPA as a 3.6/6, just list it as 3.6. If employers want to know the scale, surely they will ask. 4.) Lie. What is the chance that they will actually check? One way to safeguard against this is to make sure you do not use the word "cumulative." This way, you can explain away your lie. "Oh, 35 was my GPA in geology and dinosaur-

anceplan.

Brian Jendryb is a senior in English sexism, and economics and editor-inchief of the Review. He is therefore completely unmarketable. He hopes his improved interpersonal skills will earn him a promotion to second assistant mop boy at the Buster Brown Shoelace Factory this summer.

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related classes. That was what you ·Skills: This is where you get to show off your mastery of languages, comwanted, right?" . puterprograrns, and other valuable skills. -Interests/activities: This is where A few things not to list might include: you get to tell about the other things that . 1.) Knowledgeable in Tetris and you do in your life that will help make MacRisk applications for Macintosh comyou a valuable addition to any company. puter. Joq,s such as water boy for the field hockey 2.) Can make farting noises with team show that you are willing to start at arm-pit. the bottom. Achievements such as the 3.) Put self ~9J1ough school by ille- .~ Junior League Bowling Champion (ages next to Kerrytown gally scalping foOtball tickets to desper- ... 5-7 category) show that you strive to11-4, every Sunday through ate, rich alumni. (TDis is not to say that ward excellence. Interests such as jogChristmas scalping tickets is wrong, or even that the ging or weight-lifting show that you will law itself isn't a stupid and pointless noolt~b:e~a~b:u~r:d:en~to~th:e~c:o:m:p:an~y~'~S~in~su~r~-=~~::::::::::~~~~~~~ authoritarian way of discouraging capiIf. 0' ;c Iii talist initiative and harassing otherwise law-abiding students. It's just to say that this practice is currently not accepted by the community at large, especially by the men in blue.) U-M T-Shirts -Education: This section is mostly self-explanatory. One crucial item that 2 for $14.00 bears mentioning, however, is grade point average (GPA). For those of us who are more familiar with the academic probation board than the Dean's list, this is a rather touchy subject. It's real easy to include your GPA when it is 3.7, 3.8, or 3.9. For those of us who are, how shall we say, "conscientious contributors to the bell curve proces..'>," we are a little less inclined to publicize our grade point average. There are four things that can be done with an "underprivileged GPA." 1.) Don't include it. This usually is not such a good idea because of the Resume Axiom of Conformity. This is the rule that states that you must include some things, like a ridiculously worded objective statement, because everyone else is doing it, and if you don't, you will be shunned from every employer except the post office, or even worse, the financial aid office. 2.) Include it and hope that upon seeing your GPA is 2.4, your prospective employer will admire that you are not of the "uptight, bookworm type." 3.) Switch scales. For some reason, many people list their GPAs as xx! 4.0, as if every school in the world didn't use a 4.0 scale. Granted, not every school does,

Do your holiday t th shopping a e Ann Arbor Artisan Mark et

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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

14

Book Review

December 4, 1991

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The Invisible Victims of Affi'rmative Action '.

Invisible Victims FrederickR. Lynch

Praeger Publishers Softcover, $14.95 237 pgs. by John J. Miller The. phrase "Equal Opportunity / Affirmative Action," which appears on nearly every pamphlet and brochure printed and distributed by the guilty conscience of the University of Michigan, has begun to appear disturbingly Onvellian. Starting with the Supreme Court's 1954 Brawn v. Board offJiucation decision, and followed a decade later by the Civil Rights Act of 1964, the civil rights movement pursued a program of equality that all people be treated the same under the law, regardless of race, gender, religion, and a number of other considerations. From the Office of Federal Contract Compliance in the U.s. Department of Labor, however, came a series of increasingly ominous dictates that culminated in a 1971 decree mandating that employers redress the sins of their fathers by abandoning the notion of equality of opportunity and subscribing to a substantially different equality of outcome. The Supreme Court legitimized this action with its 1979 United Steelworkers v. Weber decision, which allowed an employer to sft aside a certain number of positions fpr minorities. The case revolved around a section of Title VII of the 1964 Civil Rights Act, which reads: Nothing contained in this title shall be interpreted to require any employer ... to grant preferential treatment to any individual or to any group because of the race, color, religion, sex, or national origin of such individual or group on ac-

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count of an imbalance which may exist with respect to the total number or percentage of persons of any race, color, religion. sex, or national origin employed by an employer. The court escaped the letter of the law by referring to the "spirit" of the Act. Quotas were thereby encoded in American society. Equal opportunity now means affirmative action. Good means bad. Critics such as Thomas Sowell have demonstrated that equality of opportunity cannot be changed to mean equality

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FREDFRICK R LYNCH of result without considerable damage. There are cultural, demographiC, and geographic reasons why we cannot expect the total members of one racial category to exhibit the same economic-result as another: Japanese are on average a decade older than blacks, Jews are 25 years older than Puerto Ricans. None .of this is to say that racial discrimination does not occur in America. Instead, it shows the futility of shoving people into groups that share many more differences than the color of their skin. Such behav-

Ite Persian .Gulf

This new book by ex-leftists Peter Collier and David Horowitz. authors of De,,,trucnve GeneratWlI, is a collection of essays address~ , 1ng AIDS, affirmative action, Angela Davis, Afghanist~n, America after Reagan, and .many other topiCS The book is listed at $14.95 by the publisher, b.~lt the Mtehigatt Review is"making a limited number of copies available for the low, low price of $5.00. Please call (313) 662-1909 for more information. We will be happy to mail copies {or a $2.00 postage fee.

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often employs the phrase "reverse disior demands that intelligent people willingly blind themselves to a number of crimination," a term which really ought important concerns and then scream racto be put to sleep. It assumes that reverse ism every time they see something that discrimination is somehow different than does not fit their fancy. normal discrimination, implicitly suggesting that a different strand of the same The social engineers march onward, infection might not be as bad. Granted, however, and the recently passed 1991 the phrase has a certain currency in evCivil Rights Bill makes it possible for employers with no intent of discriminateryday discourse, but if our society is to maintain a wide-ranging principle of ing to be guilty of discrimination. The equality, we should not temper or qualify workforce in question need only not corthe language we use in describing it. respond to the racial composition of the Replete with details of injustice, Insurrounding community. These same employers will also have to prove themvisible Victims is a good source book for selves innocent - an inversion of the those interested in the affirmative action controversy . It reads like an academic long-held judiCial principle of innocent until proven guilty. study rath er than a series of popular Meanwhile, white Americans - who essays, but to complain of this is to deny the book its function and importance. are not all filthy rich, by the way - are expected to sit tight and allow the good Lynch will hopefully continue and exbureaucrats to work their magic. Anypand his research in subsequent volumes. body who complains can be ignored . Particularly vile individuals - David Duke, for instance - will be cast into the John J. Miller is a senior in English and spotlight and derided as participants in editor-at-Iarge of the Revie'llJ. the New White Racism. This eXR.psuf1t· will allow third-rate political pundits to equate the Klan with opponents of preferential politics, as mindless bigots become the poster children for the latest pro-govemment push to micromanage the lives of American citizens. (David Duke's presidential candidacy should be quite a boon for the left, which will conUsed Stereo Componentatinue to blur the lines between an idea Large SelectIon and an individual who supports the idea. 1£ Duke were not a shameless opportunSpeak« R..,...ist who liked to see his surgically-altered Lots Woo..... and Tweeters mug on TV, he would step aside and let smarter, more credible politicians lead Rebuilding-Our Specialty the way.) Frederick Lynch's new book is a Phono Needl.. and Tapes welcome addition to this debate. Invisible Victims, subtitled "White Males and the TV ServiCe) Antenna Repara Crisis of Affirmative Action," is primaand Insurance Work rily a sociological study of white males who have lost jobs and promotions be'Is and Service or: cause of policy, not merit. This opens Screen and Regular TVa him to obvious charges of magnifying Air Conditioners the whines of a privile!?ed class, but as Lynch shows, affirmative action policies InI Refrldgtuators have hurt the lives and careers of many PA Systems blue-collar workers. The working classes AudiO-Video Equipment do not share the bureaucratic elite's view VCRs and Camcord that a government~nforced racial spoils system is a panacea for all that is ugly in 15 S. Ashley'Street America. As a pair of suppressed DemoDowntown 112 Sioek Nortft of uberty cratic party polls have shown, the socalled Reagan Democrats, who defected Iotut8rcard I. Visa to the Republican party in the 1980s, 769-0342 consider the discriminatory effects of afMon.-$at.10:Q(Hl:30 p.m. firmative action a top voting concern. Can for other hour Although Lynch is accurate in his PiCk-Up and De!iv6l'y ServICe analysis, fhere are minor problems. He

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December 4, 1991

THE MICHIGAN REVIEW

15

Arts: Music RevIew

U2's New Album is Gorgeous Trash U2

Achtung Baby Island Records by Oave Powell "It was good if a song took you on a journey or made you think your hi-fi was broken, bad if it reminded you of recording studios or U2," wrote producer Brian Eno in a recent Rolling Stone magazine, referring to the new U2 album, Achtung Baby. Applying those standards, Achtung Baby, the Irish quartet's first fullfledged studio album in nearly half a decade, is a veritable masterpiece. Everything that has to do with this album, right down to its Exile on Main Street rip-off cover, can be described with a single adjective: trashy. Even some of the song titles: "Even Better Than the Real Thing," "Love is Blindness/' and "Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses," conjure images of, well, trash. Lyrically, this is U2's trashiest outing to date. Absent is the usual dosage of Biblical symbolism and countless references to the elements, and in its place is 55 stirring minutes of "Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby light my way," and, "It's alright ... it's alright ... it's alright ... hey baby ... hey baby ... hey baby .. hey baby ... it's alright it's alright." (No kidding. Check out "Ultraviolet" and "Zoo Station.") Even "So Cruel," lyrically the strongest track, apprQaches seif-satire, with oft-heard U2 catchphrases like "you need

her like a drug," and "We are trampled underfoot," the latter straight out of "Promenade," from 1984's The Unforgettable Fire album. Despite its deliberate lyrical and presentational shoddiness, Achtung Baby works musically.

to conduct interviews or tour until after the new year. So, what to make of it? As usual, Edge's guitar arrives in hypnotic waves, careening off all four walls like a stray bullet. The playing is spirited and energetic, if less textured.

As this photo reveals, the members of U2 are really Siamese quadruplets. Indeed, going into this record, there was some question as to how much longer the record-buying public would subscribe to the "U2-as-rock-n-roll-saviors" image the group had been cultivating since 1983's War album. There was a general sense that these guys were taking themselves far too seriously. Emerging from their Berlin studio a freshly-bearded U2 plunked down the long-awaited, decidedly-European Achtung Baby last month, with no plans

U2 has opted for a harder, denser sound:" There are fewer atmospheriCS than usual, perhaps due to Brian Ends absence throughout much of the recording. What distirtguishes Achtung Baby from all previous U2 albums, however, is the absence of any fist-waving anthems. For once, U2 has proven themselves capable of leaving the consciousness-raising to the Stings of the world. I suppose in this way U2 has trumped its critics - they can no longer be dismissed

as "preachy" and "rockist." While some have used the word funky to describe U2's latest venture, the term somehow seems inappropriate. Let's face it: U2 is a lead-footed bunch, albeit an entertaining one. "Mysterious Ways," the newly-released second Single, with its riveting snare and singsong lyrics, may be U2' s most lighthearted, groove--oriented ditty to date, but it's not altogether funky. It's trashy. On the other hand, "Zoo Station," the opening track, recalls "A Sort of Homecoming," if the original were performed on add. "One" is simply gorgeous, combining late Beatles with vintage U2; "Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses" is charmingly disjointed and devoid of pretense, punctuated by Bono's characteristic vocal nuances; "Until the End of the World," with its "sheet-ofice" guitar, dark and arresting; "Tryin' to Throw Your Aims Around the World," subdued and ethereal; "So Cruel," epic; ,;,Acrobat," fiercely unremitting in its " pretensions. '1t's an album of musical oxymorons, of feelings that shouldn't exist together, but that are somehow credible," writes Eno in his final assessment. Eno chooses his euphemisms carefully. He's right; Achtung Baby is gorgeous trash. Dave Powell is a sophomore in political science and a contributing editor of the

Review.

The Atmospheric Sounds of Swervedriver Swervedriver

Ra/_ A&M Recorda by John J. Miller I just learned some rather unfortunate news - the classic rock" machine has somehow coerced Procol Harum to regroup and release a new album. A full-page ad in a national news magazine boasts, "The band that made the single of 1967 returns with the album of 1991." Ok, sure. And lots of people will care in about three weeks. Maybe the loyal listeners of WCSX and other regurgo-rock radio stations only want to listen to the music of tiresome bands like the Doobie Brothers and Yes, but they really ought to spin their dials to the left and check out material recorded this decade. Innovative groups like Jane's Ad1/

Raise kicks in with "Sd-Flyer," a diction, Nirvana, and Soundgarden have quickly-paced number with a turbulent received little mainstream radio attenintro. Like many of tion, but they have the album's nine helped create a new tracks, this one wave of rock music does not sound that, if it must be lacued and begins in beled, can be demedias res. A big scribed as a postblast of noise carpunk Black Sabbath ries with it a cer- a messy collision tain shock value, of 1970s hard rock but there are better and 1990s youthful ways to begin angst. songs, let alone alSwervedriver bums. belongs within this Swerved river new movement. Inlays down walls of deed, the band guitar fuzz at the would probably not expense of percusSwervedriver's Adam Franklin have a recording sion. This lends an contract were it not atmospheric tone to the production, an for the success of Seattle's Sub Pop record elegance to a genre that courts the prilabel.

mal. Indeed, the album's best tune, "Rave Down," has touches of the Cure's gloomier, guitar-oriented pieces. Another song worth hearing is the searing "Son of Mustang Ford." A perfect driving song, this one deserves to be heard from the speakers of speeding convertibles. The only real problem with Raise is the song order. The first several songs are loud and fast, but they become increasingly slower and mellower. This is no problem for CD owners who can program a random mix. but a bit of a downer for others. A better mix would help the album considerably.

John J. Miller is a senior in English and editor-at-Iarge of the Review.

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THE NfEHIGAN REWEW ___________________ December 4, 1991

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Crusty's Corner

The New Breed From the Barrio by P.J. Denhoff

A new breed of rappers is coming out of Los Angeles. No more pseudo gangsters and hyped, hardcore images. Cypress Hill and W.e. & the MAAD Circle are not about portraying images, they are about the awareness of reality. Cypress Hill comes at you with a frenetic sound, blending sharply looped beats with sparse yet plentiful, aggressive samples. Cuban rapper B-Real fronts the three man crew with an unforgettable nasal voice flavored with a Spanish accent. The first single, "How I Could Just Kill A Man," doesn't glorify violence, but acknowledges it as a necessary evil. "Say some punk tried to get you for your auto! What are you gonna do, one time play the role model?! No, I think you play like a thug! Next you hear the shot of a magnum slug." Unlike so many other artists today, Cypress Hill doesn't jump on the "Just Say No" bandwagon. Instead they deal openly and honestly with the topic of

drug use. The songs "Light Another," "Stoned Is the Way of the Walk" and "One For The Blunted" make no attempt to cover up their illegal habits. W.e. & the MAAD Circle bring. with them the same premise of reality over glamour. Their new album, Ain't A Damn Thing Changed, brings the truth of the city to wax. Tracks like "U Don't Work, U Don't Eat" an<;i "Behind Closed Doors" bring issues like breaking the law to survive and police brutality to the forefront. Sir Jinx from the Lench Mob provides the beats, and establishes himself as a producer to be reckoned with. Jinx's thick low b~ lines and the smooth skills of D.J. Crazy Toones give this album an , ominous feel. The prevalent, continuous • loops with little-to-no tempo change create songs with a distinctive Ice Cul:>e sound. / "'Both Cypress Hill and W.e. &the MAAD Circle have paid their dues in the hip-hop industry. Back in 1981 Cypress' Sen Dog started a group with his brother Spanglish hit- maker Mellow Man Ace.

Cypress OJ / producer Mixmaster Muggs was a founding member of the Los Angeles based 7A3 which had a song on the Colors soundtrack. W.e. was formerly a member of Low Profile with OJ Alladin. Popular underground tracks such as "Pay Ya Dues," and "That's Y They Do It," established him as a harsh and brutally honest rapper. Cypress Hill and the MAAD Circle have taken their experiences in the industry, while maintaining their individual strengths, to put together powerful debut albums. Though neither may reach the mainstream audience with a cross-over hit, Cypress Hill and Ain't A Damn Thing Changed will sell to those who appreciate rap for what it is, not the phony images it has created.

by Crusty Muncher

P.}. Danhoff is a freshman in LSA and a staff writer for the Review. 3 ... ,·r ~'

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In the mid-1980s the hard core acts began" crossing over" into the metal genre. Bands like Suicidal Tendencies, D.R.I., and Corrosion of Conformity quit making skate-rock records after the rise of Metallica and Slayer, and began recording material in the thrash vein. Many punks went thrash-metal. Now there are a trillion Metallica sound-a-like thrash bands and another Great Migration is under way. It seems that the ex-skate rockers are tired of the boring thrash scene and are unfortunately getting funky. Suicidal Tendencies frontman Mike Muir and his new band Infec· tious Grooves are the latest to release an album of this pathetic crossover crap and the material is lame. These guys bougp,t old Chili Peppers and Fishbone discs and copped every lick, JUst like they did seven years ago with the Metallica stuff ... When Nirvana carne through De-

A Campus Tradition V<?ted #1 by readers of the: , Michigan Daily Ann Arbor News Eastern EC]1o Ann Arbor Metro Times.

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troit two months ago bassist Chris Novoselic wouldn't stop praising Scotland's Teenage Fan Oub and Spin Magazine claims that TFC's Bandwaganesque is the year's best album.1f you like the guitar rock of The Replacements, Material Issue, and The Black Crowes pick this up ... Head of David are a trio from Britain with a new album out titled Seed State. Their sound is somewhere between Nine Inch Nails and The Jesus & Mary Chain ... Richard X. Heyman has a new album out titled Hey Man! on Sire. Heyman's material is very rootsy, often reminisent of the Byrds and the Beatles. He is currently on the road with the Smithereens.


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