vol_9_no_10 by Michigan Review

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The Undergraduate Odyssey by John J. Miller Graduation ceremonies tend to offer little for the intellect. Students who actually listen to the commencement speakers find themselves hoping to be entertained, not enlightened. Althoughitappears that PresidentGeorge Bush will be delivering an address in front of this year's graduating class, odds are he will either utter platitudes or direct his words toward the television cameras, and not the students. The graduation ceremony itself, however, provides an excuse to assess the state of affairs in liberal arts education. When the University of Michigan's classof1991 graduates from the College

of Literature, Science, and the Arts (LSA) in early May, many of its members will know the price of their diplo-

legitimate reservations about what they have purchased. Critics have assailed our nation's

mas - approximately $12,500 for in-

universities in recent years for lax requirements, politicized course offerings, and the near-abandonment of

state students and $42,000 for out-ofstate students. They might also harbor

Inn to Become a Private Dorm? by David J. Powell Neil Gorosh and his Southfieldbased loPatin Company recently announced plans to make the former Ann Arbor Inn the first "free market dorm" in Ann Arbor. In light of the University of Michigan's recent increase in housing costs and the lack of faith in privatization demonstrated by Ann Arbor's newly elected mayor, Liz Brater, Gorosh's plan to introduce market principles into University housing could not have come at a better moment. For the first time, U-M housing officials must address the concern that students who prefer the dorm system might take their business elsewhere. If all goes as planned, the former Ann Arbor Inn, located at the comer of Fourth Avenue and Huron, will open

as a private dormitory for U-M stutrolled housing system without being dents next fall. According to the Ann forced to adopt a different lifestyle, Arbor News, the rental price would insuch as apartment living. In order to lure students away from clude a comprehensive meal plan - in contrast to the University's limited 13traditional dorms, Gorosh is dependmeal-a-week plan - and utilities, ing on more than just the promise of minus telephone costs. In addition, better food and M1V. He is exploring students would have access to cable â&#x20AC;˘ the possibilities of a laundry service, television, a luxury item not currently maid service, secretarial service, al1 . available to all dorm residents. exercise room, and a swimming pool. Nevertheless, the most lasting efParticulary striking are the p0ssible ramifications of "free market fect of such a plan would be the introdorms" on the infamous U-M meal ductionof greater flexibility in University living - the first step in providing plan. In the past, a sfudent'scomplaints about the poor quality of dorm food better services for students and eliminating the University's long-standing fell on deaf ears. The implementation monopoly on dormitory living. of Gorosh's plans would not only provide an incentive for better dorm services, including better food, but it David J. Powell is a sophomore in political science and a contributing would empower students as well. Next editor of the Review. year, a student would have the real option of leaving the University-con-

Eastern Adopts Speech Code by Stacey Walker Eastern Michigan University joined the ranks of the sensitive on March 27. In a unanimous decision, EMU's board of regents voted to approve a discrimination and discriminatoryhar~ss~entpolicy. ,,,." The new policy prohibits offensive

speech, behavior, or other forms of expression, and extreme or outrageous" acts or communications intended to harass, intimidate, or humiliate a person on the basis of race, ethnicity, religionorcreed,age, handicap or sexual orientation. . 'not be surprised if this,' policy . /I

sounds a bit familiar. Prior to the 1989 federal court ruling that struck down a University of Michigan policy on discriminatory behavior, EMU was preparing to implement a policy closely resembling the U-M version. After

Please See Page 13 .

Westemideas. To determine the extent . to which these criticisms affect LSA, we can create a case study of a student who enrolled at the U-M in the fall semester of 1987 and will graduate on May 4, 1991. Our imaginary friend will have completed the minimum 120 credits and fulfilled the other requirements necessary for a Bachelor in General Studies degree - an option utilized by just under eight percent of the LSA students who gradtlated in the 1989-90 school year, according to the Registrar's Office. What follows is a list of classes taken by our fictitious student, accompanied by the number of credits awarded and oftentimes an excerpt of the class description as presented in the LSA Course Guide. This survey intends not to question the merit of any one course in particular, but rather the educational experience as a whole. Fall 1987 eAmerican Culture 222: Elementary Ojibwa (3). "This course is designed to give the conversational and cultural skills necessary to enable students to use Ojibwa in real life situations." eEnglish 125 (4). eSociology 102: Contemporary Social Issues (4). Section 18: An Introduction

Please See Page 6

INSIDE But Wait! There's Muir...

Interview: Phyllis Schlafly

Baseball Picks

D'Souza Review 12

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 2

THE

Serpent's Tooth So, what's with all the U-M feminists protesting Playboy's recruiting drive forits "Girls of the Big Ten" issue? Are you guys rattled because you can't get in, or because you'd have to shave your legs for once? In a recent Daily article concerning

Earth Week, MSA environmental commission chair Aberdeen Marsh explained the rationale behind selecting Lois Gibbs to speak at the week's culminating event: "We really wanted to get a woman speaker because the majority of the legwork (involving in environmental issues) is done by women." And that's a good thingbecause women have the best legs. Q: How many PC'ers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: That's not funny. Q: How many white males does it take? A: One. Later this month, the Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center (SAPAC) will sponsor a ''Take Back the Night" march. We weren't aware the night was missing, but presumably they'll take it back from the moon. But thenthey'll have to giveitto ... the Sun! Patriarchy! Astrological, cosmic Patriarchy! And, in case you didn't hear, the saps at SAPAC recently sponsored a rally

Our tentative schedule consists of the against sexism. Participants spent . hours erecting "the wall of sexism," following: Friday: which they covered with advertise- . 5:00 P.M. Cocktails and caviar. ments picturing women. Then, to unload their frustrations, they viciously 9:00 P.M. Keynote Speech, John Birch. destroyed the wall. In response, the Saturday: Review has decided to construct "the 9:00 A.M. Golf (yes, 18 holes). sexy wall." We will be posting adver3:00 P.M. Tennis - Mixed Doubles. 7:00 P.M. Debutante Ball. tisements that display attractive women and awarding prizes for the Sunday: 6:00-11:00 A.M. Church (Sermon desexiest local and national ads. Our answeringmachine will also be entertainlivered by Jonathon Edwards). Foling entries for the best erotic moan. lowed by esoteric social functions. Please wait for the beep. 3:00 P.M. Tea and Charity Ball to help homosexuals "come over to the other side." Aren't the words MENstruation and MENopause inherently sexist? The failure of SAPAC, the Wymmin's A recent Daily article explained, howStoodies Departmynt, and U-M femiever, why one really ought to attend nists in general to address this critical Women's Weekend. As one of the issue betrays the fact that even they are event's organizers put it,"People comfortable working within our evil should come because events (concernpartriarchal system. We just don't ing women) are usually so spread out. know who to trust anymore. In East Quad, they're condensed into a weekend." Nice metaphor. In the wake of the U-M's decision to reduce tuition installments from three

te two next school year, we wonder how much more money and .trees could be saved if the Michigan Vidoo Yearbook fliers were eliminated from the mailings entirely. In honor of East Quad's recent Women's Weekend and the preceding events of Gay Pride Week, we have decided to organize WASP weekend.

According to a recently discovered institute for the Humanities flyer, Teresa de Lauretis, Professor of History of Consciousness (sic) lectured on "Freud, Sexuali ty, and Perversion" on Apti18 in the Rackham Amphitheater. After the presentation, a reception was scheduled to be held, though the location was left unspecified. Nevertheless, the whole set-up leads one to wonder who •was on the receiving end of what

MICHIGAN REVIEW The Campus Affairs Journal of the University of Michigan Editor-:-in-Odef........... BrianJendryka Executive Editor............ Adam DeVore Executive Editor......................JeffMuir Contributing Editor.....DavidJ.Powell Contributing Editor.......Stacey Walker Publisher........................ .Mark O. Stern Assistant EditorM......Peter Daugavietis Assistant Editor....................Corey Hill Assistant Editor............ ~ .....Jay McNeill Copy Editor.........................Dala Taylor Music Editor.......................Chris Peters Literary Editor..............Adam Gargiola MTS Editor........................DougThiese Francophile ................KarenBrinkman Staff Chris Bair, Mike Beidler, David Boettger, Mister Boffo, Spencer Carney, Joe Coletti, Brian Cook, Sam Copi, Vincent DeSantis, Mary Dzon, Athena Foley, John Gnodtke, Reg Goeke, Jon Hoekstra, Nicholas Hoffman, Omar Javaid, Kishore Jayabalan, Heather Johnston, Gary Mally,Bud Muncher, Crusty Muncher, Megan Nelles, Greg Roth, Michael Skinner, Jay Sprout, John Transue, AI Tulkki, Anthony Woodlief.

Our Old Publisher......Brian Meadors Editor-at-urge'M""""".JohnJ. Miller Editor Emeritus.MMMMM..Marc Selinger The MichigAn Rroiew is an independent, non-profit, student-run journal at the University of Michigan. We are not affiliated with any political party. Unsigned editorials represent the opinion of the editorial board. Signed articles represent the opinions of the author and not necessarily those of the Retriew. We welcome letters and articles and encourage comments about the journal and issues discussed in it. Our address is: Suite One 911 North University Ann Arbor, MI 48109-1265 (313) 662-1909 Copyright 1991

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The Michigan Review, ApriI16~1991, p. 3

Roving Photographer What do you think of the new Conservative Coalition-led MSA? by Gary Mally

Michael Hetzel, LSA Junior: James Greenisaconservativeguy. I think it is a positive step for MSA.

Jeremy Bailenson, LSA: I believe that MSA should have the authorization to declare war. How can we have a govemmentwhich doesn't have a military equipped with B-2 stealth bombers?

Lyle King, Engineering Senior: I don't.

Scott Pepperman, LSA Sophomore: I think MSA is a joke.

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Do you ... Oppose speech bans? Support the teaching of classic literature? Abhor the politicization of the classroom? Feel the U-M's leftists need to be challenged? If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, support

The Michigan Review I

With your tax-deductible donation of $15 or more, you'll receive a one-year subscription to the campus affairs journal of the University of Michigan. You'll read in-depth articles about the wasteful U-M bureaucracy, be the first to hear of First Amendment violations, and keep abreast of the forces working to erode traditional Western education.

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 4

From Suite One

The Core Curriculum: LSA's Road to Recovery Chances are you wouldn't want to be left out at sea without a sail; left, that is, to drift to the dictates of a random current. Yet this is precisely what happens towards the end of every semester at the University of Michigan, when you are handed a catalog with hundreds of course listings and toid to show up at graduation after you've completed 120 credits. The U-M, of course, is only one of many formerly excellent universities which have transformed themselves into diploma mills. The recent publication of the National Review College Guide, which lists what it considers to be the nation's top 50 liberal arts colleges, confirms this view. To many people's surprise, the guide does not incl ude such standard fare as Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, or even theU-M.WilliamF.Buckleyjustifiestheconspicuousabsenceofournation'smost prestigious institutions in the introduction: "This is not because you cannot get a good education at Harvard, but because you can graduate from Harvard without getting a good education." Anybody who has attended the U-M for more than a semster will suspect Buckley's words apply with equal validity to the U-M's College of Literature, Science, and .the Arts (LSA). By simply avoiding rigorous coursework, the U-M will gladly award a degree to any student who has completed 120 credits and paid his tuition bills (see "The Undergraduate Odyssey" on page one). For this reason, we strongly urge LSA to strengthen its minimum graduation requirements. While specific core requirements are a source of debate, nearly every survey makes two things clear. First, not enough students enroll in math and science courses. Despite the high-paying jobs offered to students with such degrees, many consider them "too difficult" and fulfill the science credits they do need with courses that could be taught to high school freshmen. As a consequence, many experts predict a serious shortage of scientifically literate Americans in the future. What impact this might have on economic competition remains to be seen.

Second, few students are familiar with the core ideas of Western ci viliza tion or American history. According to a survery conducted by the National Endowment of the Humanities, 42 percent of American college seniors could not place the Civil War in the correct half century, 58 percent could not name the author of The Republic, and 23 percent believed that Karl Marx's phrase, ''From each according to his ability, to each according to his need," is part of the American Constitution. How can we possibly ask these students to participate fully and responsibly in our democratic society without possessing even a rudimentary understanding of the tradition and culture that molds all contemporary debate? To help remedy this unfortunate situation, we suggest that LSA toughen its graduation requirements. We feel students should be required to fulfill the following: 16 math or science credits, six at the 200-level or above; 12 humanities credits, six at the 300-level or above; 12 social science credits, six of the 12 at the 300-level or above and four of the 12 in American history or government. Furthermore, a student must take four credits of English composition, Great Books (which would now be available to non-honors students), or Western Civilization. The proposed system calls for greater flexibility, too. Instead of requiring the fourth-term foreign language proficiency of aU students, they would have the option of completing that requirement( without the pass / fail gradingmodifica tion) or 16 credits consisting of the foUwing: four in American history, four in European history, four in political science, and four English, history, or political science credits of the student's choice. These proposed modifications would be relatively easy to implement, as they enhance rather than overhaul the system currently in place. The University of Michigan should seize the opportunity to become a flagship institution, encouraging greatness instead of catering to the lowest common denominator.

Does the Tenant's Voice Speak for You? Despite the abundant evidence of the Michigan Student Assembly's (MSA) incompetence in handling student money, whether it be exemplified by small scale snafu's like granting vandal Todd Ochoa $450 in legal fees or more grotesque embarrassments like funding "fact-finding" trips to foreign lands, many students are still convinced that MSA's activities are so necessary that all students should be forced to fund them. Presently, every student must pay $6.77 to MSA, which then decides how to spend that money. Of all the leechesMSA feeds, however, the Ann Arbor Tenants Union (AATV) is possibly the most pernicious. Granted, the AATV may provide valuable information and resources to students, who as first-time tenants are often unfamiliar with leases and landlords. Yet it sucks away approximately 8% of MSA's roughly half-million dollar budget with the supposed purpose of commitment to "tenant control over safe, decent, accessible and affordable housing." A closer look suggests that students are getting more than they bargained for - much more-insofar as the AATV frequently spends that money on projects of dubious merit. The March-April 1991 Tenant's Voice, the newsletter ofthe AATV, reveals the actual breadth of that organization' s agenda. The front page headline, for instance, reads, "State budget cuts to increase poverty and homelessness." The article laments the nearly 800,000 welfare recipients who will not be receiving as much free money as they once enjoyed. Certainly there is no shortage of U-M students who earnestly desire the statist, quasi-socialist policies for which the article yearns - but should a U-M student be forced to subsidize editorial views with which he disagrees? And if so, does the mandatory funding stop at the Tenants' Voice, or should it also include Agenda, Ten Percent, the Daily, the Ann Arbor Metro Times, and, of course, the Review? Page two of the Tenant's Voice contains an anti-war poem by Paul Lambert. Again, many students might sympathize with Lambert's position, but students who supported the war should not be forced to fund it. Page five features a story with the headline, "Groups blast Bush budget: demand new federal priorities." The story informs us that "the Ann Arbor Tenants' Union helped organize a local

coalition in January to respond to President George Bush's proposed budget." After pointing out that every Ann Arbor household pays over $3000 in federal income tax alone, the article advocated spending in different government programs (called "necessary social programs"). This is like chiding Robin Hood for not giving enough stolen money to poor people. We realize that a great number of students love big government and big government subsidies, but should all students be forced to fund those views? The.dubious nature of the AATV's expenditure of student money is further evidenced by page seven of the Tenant's Voice, which announces an ACT-UP "week of actions." One of the actions amounts to whining to the University Hospital for more free money and mandatory education programs. Here the problem is not merely that students might disagree with ACT-UP's actions; more importantly, because the University forces students to contribute to the AA TV, the U-M implicitly (though subtly) takes sides in political debates wherein it ought to remain neutral. Another case in point: the back page of the newsletter plugs the Homeless Action Committee's fightto keep the parking situation in Ann Arbor miserable for honest citizens. Again, many may agree, but should all students be forced to fund such views? Remember how the AATV was supposed to pursue "tenant control over safe, decent, accessible and affordable housing?" The Voice justifies itself on the grounds that it "is a place for communication among tenants working toward that goal." But clearly the Ann Arbor Tenants' Union serves notas a tenants' union, but rather as another excuse to gorge on students' money without their consent. If there were a way for students to freely choose whether or not to subsidize the AATV and its leftist Voice, that would, of course, be most desirable. Indeed, there is no reason why the AATU need have any affiliation with the University at all. Those who approve of the AATV's agenda should be free to donate to it voluntarily, as if purchasing membership in an auto-dub. Those who do not approve of it should not have to fund it. How can this be accomplished? The answer is obvious: either make MSA fees voluntary or sever the MSA-AATU connection entirely.

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 5

But wait, there's Muir

Tearing Down the Wall of Idiocy by Jeff Muir On April 15, the balloting came to a close for the Sexual Assault Preventionand Awareness Center' s (SAP AC) annual ''Most Sexist Advertisement" contest. The contest featured two categories: most sexist local ad, and most sexist national ad. Headed by arch-feminist Julie Steiner, SAPAC is the University of Michigan office in charge of, as the name implies, "sexual assault prevention and awareness," on its face an admittedly laudable cause. Butasinso many other cases, U-M radicals have transformed a laudable cause into a political monster. SAPAC, you'll remember, is the outfit that "created" its very own category of sexual assault - so-<:alled "psychological rape." According to this doctrine, normal men (i.e., men who

breathe, have vision, and whose glands loose in the world. As a result, adverproduce testosterone) are perverted sex tisements which portray women in freaks who ought to what SAPAC conbe locked up. siders demeaning Now SAPAC is ordegradingsituaoutto purge the world Learn the Review's tionsservetoobjecof "sexist advertistify women, making." ing them less than But what, one IF@lI:'1l»urru~ ~ l]l human (the story may ask, does "sexgoes), and easier to ist" (in SAPAC's §~~rr~{t~ sexually assault. opinion, that is) adFrom view, I can vertising have to do only assume that with "sexual assault Dial SteinerandSAPAC prevention and 1-900-HOT-BABE view t~e general awareness," and how population as dowill exposing such mesticated herd • Vi=s aprt:sstr1 by litt Ilol bob<s.,. "'" """""';ly tltos< of • advertising further littRmew.lfyowlhW:thisisfi>".,J" hco,.,.', .. big. arumals and themthe goals of SAPAC? dvmb idio<. selves as the shepApparently, herds. SAPAC feels that hordes of feebleIf SAPAC desires merely to critiminded woman-chasers are running cize anything normal and male, then

the connection betWeen: advertising and its definition of sexism is easily seen, If, however, SAPAC's goals include "sexual assault prevention and awareness," it requires quite a stretch of the imagination to make any connection at all. For example, one of the advertisements nominated in the category of most sexist local ad was the Michigan Review' 5 very own "Dial 1-900-Hot-Babes" ad parody. SAPAC claims that this is one of the four most vile and sexist local ads of the year. Curiously, though, the ad meets none of SAPAC's six criterion for consideration: ''Parts of bodies; Using women's bodies to sell products; Urnited standard of beauty; Violence; Stereotypes; Children" - in fact, it contains no pho-

Please See Page 15

-----Letters to the Editor - - - - - "Global Warming" Article Omitted Items There were a few significant things I said which were omitted by Jay McNeill in his article based on his interview with me ("Global Warming: A Lot of Hot Air?" April 3, 1991 ). McNeill has done a good job in explaining why things are less certain than one might have been led to think, but something I also said (which he did not include in his article) is that itis important to find out how much of an additional greenhouse effect human acti vity is causing, because if we really are causing significant global warming, it is very important to know this and take corrective measures. All the evidence (from geology) is that the earth's climate is quite unstable. In the past, at times the earth has been a lot warmer than now, and at other times ("ice ages") a lot colder. Right now we are somewhere in between, and if the past is a good predictor of the future, the earth's climate is 'going to change even without human intervention. Given that we do not understand what triggers most of these changes, it is not unreasonable to be concerned that man-made activity might trigger a major climate change. The potential problem definitely deserves careful research. At the end of my interview with McNeill I emphasized that there defi-

nitely are serious environmental problems which, unlike global warming, are already beyond reasonable doubt. I personally advocate doing everything we can to reduce our dependency on fossil fuels, not because of a hypothesised" greenhouse effect," but because we are using up very finite resources. It is important to recycle .whatever we can. Perhaps the biggest step we can take to help preserve the earth's non-renewable resources is to arrange lives that are not so automobiledependent. Lest McNeill's article should have given the impression thatI am an expert on the earth' sabnosphere, I should say that I only have an astronomer's knowledge of the issues. People who want to learn more about the technical details of the issues should consult the Department of Abnospheric, Oceanic and Space Sciences on North Campus.

Professor Martin Gaskell Department of Astronomy

Review is Reassuring Kudos to your publication, its editors, and staff! It is very reassuring to see some common sense applied to issues that are appearing at the front of campus life today. It is very alarming to imagine that some of the liberal tendencies on the part of some student organizationsmay get carried beyond the sphere of campus politics. Your hard work and efforts to expo~ iill .sides of .a~ ,

"";'

issue are beneficial to all students. It also demonstrates to faculty members, who use their positions notto teach but to propagandize their own political agendas, that students are not going to bow down and kiss the very ground they walk on in order to get a better grade. Keep up your hard work. It truly makes a difference. Geoffrey 0, Perkins

Article Contained \ Misconceptions I am writing to clarify some misconceptions about MSA funding and student groups that appeared in Ariel Fox's essay condemning the mandatory MSA fee. Fox writes that he does not want groups like the Cornerstone Christian Fellowship (CCF) funding from part of his $6.77 per-term fee. To my knowledge, CCF has never asked for nor received funding from MSA. This misconception does not nullify the basic theme of Fox's essay, and I take no position on the mandatory MSA fee. But this misconception regarding student group funding is a dangerous one which causes groups likeCCF to receive far more abuse than they deserve. Let us take care as we discuss this issue to separate fact from

Review is Loved by Faithful Reader I enjoy reading every issue of the

Review, and am very glad the paper will be corning out more often. In Ann Arbor, it is very difficult to find material oriented towards a conservative, or even a moderate, viewpoint, especially material of the Revieufs caliber. Campus and world issues are given the serious treabnent they deserve, while their humorous sides are not neglected. I love the Review...keep it up!

Megan Whitlock LSAjunior

Review is Not Offensive I have noticed a trend that most of the objections claiming the Review is derogatory have come from women. Asafemale, I find no offense with your paper. Often, however, Ido take offense with those who find it offensive. I do not find it necessary to jump on the proverbial bandwagon to protest a "cause" at the drop of a hat. In fact, when I find someone who can "protest the protestors," I find it 1'efreshing and commendable! Come on, people are people and if you can't laugh at each other it is a sad world indeed.

Holli L. &hI

myth.

jim Higgins Rackham Graduate Student

Art School junior

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 19,91, p. 6 .

Undergraduate Odyssey Conti.n~ From Page 1

to Sociology Through Social Movements. "American Society is characterized by racism, sexism, and student inequality ... We will seek an understanding of both society and social movements by studying the Civil Rights, Student and Women's Movements of the 19605." (May be repeated for credit.) -Women's Studies 240: Introduction to Women's Studies (4). "Topics will include: violence against women, discrimination in the workplace, the feminization of poverty, and sexuality. Students will also examine how capitalism, racism, and imperialism affect women's lives." Winter 1988 • American Culture 223: Elementary Ojibwa (3). -English 411: Art of the Fllm (3). Vietnam and the Artist. Films studied included every anti-American cinematic experience one is likely to encounter, such as Hearts and Minds and "films made by the South Vietnamese National Uberation Front" No mention was made of Rambo II. -University Course 151: Freshman Seminar (4). Blacks and Jews: Dialogue on Ethnic Identity. "Initially, the class will explore the unique concerns and perspectives of minority groups and individuals ... Dialoguearnongstudents in the class will be an essential component in the course and it is expected that students selecting the class will be prepared to openly, critically, and sensitively participate to further an Understanding of the issues." Remember: be critical and sensitive.

-Anthropology458: Topics in Cultural Anthropology (3). Section 1: Shamanism and Tragedy. One of the professor's interests: "an approach which instead of exclusively or mainly focusing on techniques (drumming, trance, etc.) and universals, asks what are the ways by which shamanic art tries to extract curative magic from local history, as such history is embedded in the often tragic consequences of modem world history." Absences are punished by bewitching. -Environmental Studies 320: Introduction to Environmental Studies (4). -Sociology 102: Contemporary Social Issues (4). Section 9: ''IWJe will proceed with an examination of three social movements in the United States. These include the labor movement, the women's movement, and the Civil Rights movement The final part of the course will examine the revolutionary movements that are occurring in the Third World and the U.s. response." (May be repeated for credit) What? The students don't study the Reagan Revolution? -Women's Studies 342: Gender and Society (3). Hierarchies in Social Organization. ''We will examine the explanationsof,and proposed remedies for, women's disadvantaged positions within the workplace, the family, the economy, and the political arena."

Feel Lonely? Bottom 15 LSA majors for 1989-90 15. Judaic Studies - 6 14. Linguistics - 5 9. (tie) Drama, Geological Sciences, Italian, Latin, Medieval and Renaissance Studies-4 8. Classical Language and literature - 3 6. (tie) Afroamerican and African Studies, Botany-2 1. (tie) Biophysics, Computer and Communication Science, Hebrew Studies, Psychology /Speech and Hearing Science, Scandinavian Studies - 1 Futures (3). "The overall purpose is not onlyfa scholarly examination of various conceptions of the future but an attempt to construct a humanly meaningful and ecologically sustainable future for you and me; and the Third World people as well." -Women'sStudies: Practical Feminism (1). Lesbian Studies. "The class will discuss ... lesbian thought."

Winter 1989 • Afro-American Studies 461: PanAfricanism I (3). • American Culture 323: Intermediate Ojibwa (3). "The empha,sis in class is on increasing the range of situations in which the student can use Ojibwa in real life." -English 319: Literature and Social Change (3). "[W]e'll be planning and producing various forms of progressive theater in our community."

Fal11988 -American Culture 322: Intennediate OjIbwa (3).

J~ Muir, a ~re appropriat.e title for

•

this class nught be "The Blology of Nicaragua, Radical POJrEnvironmentalism,andStale19605LeftistRhetoric."

•

Top 10 U-M maJors for 1989-90 -167

-Psychology 100: Learning to Learn (4). "[I]ntended for students who wish to improve their skills and strategies forleamingandmemory." Apparently, most other classes don't implicitly provide this feature. -Sociology450: Political Sociology (3). Vehementlyanti-capitalist.

~ .. 9. M~charucal Engmeenng - 244 .

8. History - 254 7. General Studies - 287 6. Communication - 290 5 Business Administration _ 311 4' E . 447 . co.n~nucs .3. Political Science - 470 2. English - 489 1. Psychology - 574 (at a dime a dozen that's $4 78) "

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Winter 1990 in Black World Studies (3). Section 1: Black ute and History in Michigan. :. "T~ics covered include slavery in t

Fall 1990 - Anthropology 459: Inequality in Tribal Societies (3). "Both received wisdom and recent theory have emphasized the production and circulation of accumulatable forms of wealth as the source of inequality. Unequal accumulation and relations of dependence and indebtedness are seen to follow inevitably from the sheer presence of wealth (which should thus be absent in egalitarian societies.) The Marxian system holds..."

- Afro-American Studies 358: Topics

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is there a lab? -English 413: Film Genres and Types (3). "This course willlook at two different genres, the post-1972 horror film and sex farce, that share the common aim of 'grossing~uf the audience ... Films to be screened will possibly include ... The Texas Chainsaw Massacre ... Animal House, Porky's, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, [and] Revenge of the Nerds." Prepare for an intellectual b0nanza. -Women's Studies 380: Women's Studies Colloquium (3). Section 2: Lesbian Realities: Institutional Transformations. ''We will examine how religion, psychotherapy, and law have negated lesbian experiences and how lesbian activisms have begun to transform these institutions .,. THIS COURSE WILL APPEAR ONLY AS WS 380 ... ON ALL TRANSCRIPTS AND UNIVERSITY RECORDS." Whew!

Fall 1989 - American Culture 422: Advanced Ojibwa (3). ''Students will ... leamabout the problems of working in a language withouta standard writing system that is widely accepted." Note the obvious practicality. -Biology 101: Biology and Humail Affairs ('1). According to the Review's

Feel LI·ke a Numb er? 10 BioI

Michigan ..." - American Culture 423: Advanced Ojibwa (3). -English 280: Thematic Approaches to Uterature (3). Section 1: Erotic Fantasies in Male and Female 20th Century Uterature. "The students should be aware of being asked to read some very candid sexual descriptions." But

-Environmental Studies 401: Special Problems in Environmental Studies (3). Alternative Patterns of Resource Utilization: The Amish in Twentieth Century America. "Amish life-style offers an implicit critique of consumption patterns and agricultural methods characteristic of the 19805." -University Course 488: Alternative

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-Comparative Uterature 240: Introduction to Comparative Uterature (3). "[TJhis course will ask 'What is literature?' ... We will probably write a collective poem or two in class, or perhaps try our hand at inventing a 'sacred text.' " - History 161: United States 1865 to the Present (4). ''What are the forces that have shaped contemporary America? This course will attempt to answer this question by focusing on such topics as the meaning of race, class, gender, and ethnicity in American society..." This class is taught by Prof. Terrence McDonald, a man who, when questioned at a public forum, could not explain the difference between race and ethnicity, yetferventlycampaigned for the new LSA requirement on the study of "issues arising from racial or ethnic intolerance." - University Course 252: Collegiate Seminar (4). Section 1: The Environmental Crisis: Ecology, Economics, and Ethics. "Many experts believe that the decade of the 1990s provides us with our last opportunity to deal constructively with the daunting environmental problems facing the world today ... Armed with an understanding of cause, we will then turn our attention to the diverse approaches advocated by prominent environmentalists in formulating policies designed to alleviate or solve environmental problems." Winter 1991 - American Culture 496: Historical Approaches to American Culture (3). Section 1: Topics in American EnvironmentalHistory. "Topics will include ... the relationship between gender, ecology, and production." . -English 317: Uterature and Culture (3). Section 5: Experience and Expression: Prison and Drug Cultures. "We will be looking at poems, testimonies,

narratives, drawings, films, and investigations from both inside and outside prison and probably crack cocaine cultures ... we shall not only study the texts themselves, but enter into contact with the producers of those works and some part of the context, as well as with others who share their experiences. Each students (sic) will have a

- University Course 299: Race, Racism, and Ethnicity (4). The class will"explore the following topics ... Ways in which we encounter racism every day and how change can be broughtabout." Field trips will notinclude a visitto the Affirmative Action Office. -Women's Studies 341: Gender and the Individual: Transmission and

'passing,' transvestism and transsexual ism as both a putting into question of theoretical paradigms, such as the sex-gender system and as an aesthetic convention used to represent cultural contradictions involving gender, race, class, sexual orientation, religion, and colonialism." The likelihood of any student actually enrolling in this exact schedule must be very small. Yet the possibility exists, and this in itself warrants concern. Granted, students should be allowed a certain degree of freedom in making course selectipns, but random, misinformed, and simply poor choices can amount to a situation such as the one created above. The LSA administration ought to consider seriousIy what it believes should entail an undergraduate education in the liberal arts, and whether the example presented in this article meets those standards.

Feel Different? Top 5 interesting U-M majors for 1989-90 5. Physical Geography (as opposed to mental geography?) 4. Church Music 3. Double Bass (in case one bass is not enough) 2. Metalwork and Jewelry Design (make your own class ring!) 1. Weaving and Fabric Design (home of the famed "Underwater Basket Weaving" class?) placement in a prison, drug rehab center, halfway hourse(sic), crisis center, etc., and will work with people from those two cultures, who will also participate in classroom meetings. This is a new course, and we will be feeling our way together ... grading procedures will be decided by students and instructor." - English 473: Topics in American literature (3). Section 5: Up Against the Dominant Culture: Four Decades of Literary Rebellion. "Our objective will be to examine a variety of literary texts in which writers have attempted to . challenge what they perceive to be repressive, exploitative, racist and sexist cultural values in the US." But what about homophobia, ageism, imperialism, speciesism, and lookism? This specious selectivity must be seen for what it is: "Ismism."

Function of Sex/Gender Systems (3). Section 1: Sex Changes. "This course will examine 'sex changes' in the form of cross-dressin~, impersonation,

With graduation in sight don't forget that we carry _ a complete line of invitations and announcements from ...

JOSTENS

Do you want to argue about a core curriculum?

Remember the UofM with a college class ring from Josten's. Stop by our display and choose from the many different styles available.

How about abortion? Capital punishment? The EPA?

Jeff Muir? · discussed on the.M'Ieh'ZAll of these..things are cun:ent1 y bemg • , . 'nf' T . . MREV:Forum gan Revzews computer co erence. 0 Jom, type at the # prO~~!. ~O it<sc:o~ .:. ~e may \1'.11. be, ta1~g!abo~~!{)u!u;, _," ... ·L.'.!") , , ) , ! L . ·c.l",H{',,j·,,V01.}, Ii

John J. Miller is a junior in English and editor-at-Iarge of the Review.

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Interview

Schlafly vs. The Radical Feminist Agenda On March 21, 1991, Corey Hill of the

Review interviewed Phyllis Schlafly, president of the Eagle forum. Mrs. Schlafly, who was instrumental in the defeat of the ERA, spoke at the UAC Student Soapbox Debate on Abortion. REVIEW: What is your opinion of women's studies departments? SCHLAFLY: "Women's studies departments" is a misnomer. They are not women's studies, they are radical feminist studies. They do not believe in the choice to be pro-life. They are advocates of abortion and every item on the radical feminist agenda. REVIEW: What do you mean by lithe radical feminist agenda"? SCHLAFLY: The radical feminist agenda always starts with the alleged right of a woman to kill her unborn baby. They look upon abortion as a woman's premier right. They also support every type of sexual behavior outside of marriage, including homosexual and lesbian agendas, and they usually support prostitution also. The radical feminist agenda also calls for the government to spend our tax dollars to address most cjf their "problems," including paying for abortions and funding their tactics for imposing their ideology on the rest of us through universities, grants, studies, daycare centers, and lawsuits. REVIEW: Feminists frequently employ the rhetoric of freedom and liberation. Do they live up to this in practice, or do tMy tend to suppress dissenting views?

REVIEW: Would it be fair to say that feminism sacrifices the real rights of women? SCHLAFLY: I do not believe feminism supports women's rights at all. It supports the radical agenda, and that view is anti-marriage, anti-family, and anti-motherhood. If children do come into the picture, they look upon them as the responsibil- â&#x20AC;˘ ity of the government and the taxpayers rather than the mothers and fathers.

The best way to have equal opportunity for everybody is to get the government off our backs and allow the private enterprise system to operate.

REVIEW: How likely is it that Roe t7. Wade will be overturned? SCHLAFLY: Roe t7. Wade will be overturned, but I do not know when. It is

SCHLAFLY: The feminist agenda believes that I do not have the right to exist or to express a view. Many times the feminists havepicketed orprotesteda 1'_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _...... debate because they are opposed to a presentacent Time magazine article said we have tion of an anti-feminist view. They do moved into an era where we celebrate not believe in any type of fair play or gender differences instead of trying to recognition of women who do not agree force ourselves all into the same mold with them. and pretend that we are all the same.

The best way to have equal opportunity for everybody is to get the government off our backs and allow the private enterprise system to operate.

SCHLAFLY: This case allows the states to devise their own legislation about abortion. That's basically the situation we had prior to Roe t7. Wade. The Supreme Court never should have gotten into the act of legislating on abortion. I think the Webster decision will open the way for most states to ban abortion. REVIEW: Many U-M feminists reacted negatively to the recent parental consent laws. What is your view of the laws?

REVIEW: Ronald Reagan credits you as the force that defeated the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA). What is the best way to achieve equal rights for both genders? SCHLAFLY: The Constitution asjt is now written and the private enterprise system are the best sources for equal rights for our people. ERA was one of the goals of the radical feminist agenda, and it was an attemptto use the power of government to force us into pretending that there is no difference between men and women. For example, ERA would have required women to be drafted and assigned to combat duty just like men. The American people rejected it. A re-

REVIEW: What efÂŁectdoyou think of . the Supreme Court's decision in the Reproductive Health Services case will have on the future of abortion laws?

SCHLAFLY: I certainly think that an abortionist should have to notify the parents of a minor girl, and should have to get their consent before performing an abortion. Children cannot get their ears pierced or their bodies tatooed without parental consent. It seems to me that an abortion is at least that important, and the parents should be involved. REVIEW: What do you see as the future of feminism?

the worst decision in the history of the Supreme Court. Essentiallywhatitdoes is to make the unborn baby the property of the mother, to do with as she sees fit during the nine months of pregnancy. Our society cannot tolerate one human being being the property of another. REVIEW: What do you think of the Supreme Court's decision to ban fetal protection policies? SCHLAFLY: It is certainly in line with Blackmun's view that the unborn child is the property of the mother. She can do as she pleases, including exposing the child to environmental risks that may deform the baby. I think that aspectis very unfortunate. I believe each individual should have an inalienable right to life, and it should not be at the whim of someone else to decide whether you are born and born healthy or not.

SCHLAFLY: Feminism as an ideology is morally, socially, and politically bankrupt. If you read the articles that typically appear in feminist publications, you will see that feminism has an identity crisis, thatitis "over the hill," that young women do not relate to it. Evidence of the feminist ideology's bankruptcy is the new biography of Simone de Beauvoir, who is the big mother hen of radical feminism. She said marriage is an obscene bourgeois institu tion. Her book, The Second Sex, is the number one book that has come out of the feminist literature which is typically studied in women's studies courses, and she is certainly no role model for young women.

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Opinion

Will California U's Become, Diploma.Mills? by Rick Henderson A populist California economist discovers that college graduates earn 30 percentrnore than those who do not have degrees. So the state's voters pass an initiative that automatically awards bachelors' degrees to all high school graduates and other California natives who are 18 years of age or older. No longer will those who have college diplomas enjoy undemocratic advantages. The income of all adult Californians will rise. Under those circumstances, of course, simply having a college diploma wouldn't miraculously raise your salary. And the initiative itself is fiction - the brainchild of Robert A. Heinlein in his 1982 novel Friday. But influential California legislators, led by Assembly Speaker Willie Brown, have given the general principle a home in the Golden State's legal code. It could permanently devalue the nation's largest higher education network. For three consecutive years, the California legislature has considered bills that encourage "educational equity" in the state's post-secondary institutions. The legislation - which may pass this year-is designed to increase educational opportunities for "underrepresented" ethnic and socioeconomic groups. But it doesn't setout to improve the education these students receive. Instead, it requires higher education officials to meet a target racially balanced graduation rates. Affirmative action officers may delight in the legislature's goals. Yet students of all races and economic classes who seek academic excellence - and the taxpayers who foot their bills - will suffer. For the past three decades, California lawmakers have pursued three goals in higher education: access to quality education for all qualified residents; solid educational programs run by competent teachers; and diverse student bodies led by programs that help all students develop th~ir potential. The state has eased access to its schools by providing virtually tui tionfree enrollment to all residents. Still, it rewards the best students by establishing a hierarchy inside the university system. The University of California campuses recruit from only the top one-sixth of high school graduating classes; California State University seeks students from the top one-fourth. Community colleges are open to ev-

eryone else. better prepared for post-secondary tary, fewer than 400 blacks received education will bernore likely to stay in But the racial compositions of the Ph.Ds in the United States in 1988. student bodies and the graduating school and graduate. A school choice That was about two percent of all docclasses do not reflect the ethnic mix of program for elementary and high toral degrees awarded. In most areas stateresidents.In 1986, eight percent of schools, which would allow students of the humani ties and natural sciences, California'shighschoolgraduates were of all economic backgrounds to choose no blacks received Ph.D.s. l'Discouragblacks and 20 percent were Latinos. Yet the best schools, would provide a good ing as these numbers are,they are getamong University of California start. Tax credits, vouchers, or even an ting worse," Thernstrom writes. The freshmen in 1988,only five percentwere open enrollment plan for public school quest for racia1ly balanced faculties will blacks and 12 percent Latinos. And of students could help. Unfortunately for deprive those students who desperthose who received bachelors' degrees California students, Superintendent of ately need strong teaching. from U-C campuses in 1988, less than Public Instruction Bill Honig is one of These battles have spread beyond California. The Middle States Associafour percent were blacks, and eight the nation's rnost outspoken opponents tion of Colleges and Schools is already percent Latinos. of school choice. So the legislature told California's California laws already underholding back accreditation when to post-secondaryeducators, ''Thou shalt mine the goal of competent teaching. schools which fail to recruit acceptable graduate racially balanced classes." Thestaterequirescommunitycolleges numbers of minority faculty and students. AssemblyBills4620ntroducedbyTom to have racially balanced faculties by Hayden) and 3993 (introduced by the year 2005. In the meantime, the If California's educators focus on Speaker Willie Brown) target both adcolleges will hire more than 18,000 facgraduation rates and ethnic composition rather than on improving the mission policies and graduation rates. ultymembers. By the end of next year, educatioR received by disadvantaged Along with lofty language about re30 percent of those hired must belong students, the value of all California ducing racism and increasingopportuto an ethnic minority. nity, the bills offer this "remedy" for Butthere are not enough qualified degrees wiU plummet. Once a college racial imbalance: by the year 2000, the candidates. As Abigail Themstrom student bodies and graduating classes pointed out in the July 1990 CommenPlease See Page 13 of each division of ' the highereducation system should mirror the racial and ethnic makeup of the April 16, 1991 state. The bills easily Dear President Duderstadt: passed the legislative May 1 will mark the third anniversary of the implementation of the University committees last year, but never reached of Michigan Policy on Discrimination and Discriminatory Conduct by Students in the the full Assembly for University Environment. This policy was struck down in August 1989 by federal a vote. judge Avem Cohn as unconstitutional but was soon replaced with the University of Equity is no Michigan Interim Policy on Discrimination and Discriminatory Conduct by Students substituteforeducain the University Environment. While the legality of the Interim Policy with respect to tional quality - especially for disadFirst Amendment rights is questionable, one thing is clear: the administration's vantaged students. attempt to control student speech with any type of policy is wrong. Those who enter The U-M ought to be educating its students, not engaging in a partisan evaluacollege with poorly tion of their thoughts. Federal, state and local laws already tempered by the Bill of developed academic skills have enough. Rights should be wholly sufficient to evaluate and enforce student speech and conduct troubles. As social By making students answerable to a U-M policy on speech, they become hostages to a critics like Thomas bureaucracy that does not have the resources to protect or ensure these rights. Sowell and Walter According to the Interim Policy, it is the University'S duty to protect the Williams have noted, "educational process" at the U-M. Using resources intended for education to police placing these stuthe speech of students is not the job of the University. As editors of campus newspadents at a campus such as U.c. when pers we ask the administration to abandon this policy. The Interim Policy benefits no they-might be more one. Not newspapers, not students, and especially not the "educational process." suited for Cal State or a community colBrian Jendryka Andrew Gottesman lege can simply Editor--iIKhief Editor--iIKhief overwhelm them. for the Michigan Review for the Michigan Daily State officials should instead focus on the education MarkSanor Lisa Bean students get before Editor-iIH::hief Editor-iIH::hief entering college. for the Res Gestae for Prospect Students who are

A Letter from the Editors

路 The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 10

Sports: Baseball Preview

Tigers Doomed for Mediocrity ... Again by Tom Blnkow Get your nose out of those books - you have had months to study. If you are still that far behind in April, you are not going to catch up anyway. Look - you just missed Opening Day. It is time to stop studying and get on with the season and the Review's 1991 baseball predictions: American League East The Boston Red Sox and Toronto Blue Jays, both above-average teams, may have the only winning records in the division this year. TORONTO gets the edge with the only decent pitching in the division, even though they possess less on offense. Toronto had the best offense in the league last year (767 runs) and traded its best hitters for ...worse hitting? There mtl$t have been a serious internal conflict, because they are left with two big problems. First, they may lack enough players on base for the RBI men to drive in. The Jays were tied for eighth in on-base percentage last year, and traded three of their four beston-basemen,SS Tony Fernandez, IB Fred McGriff and OF Junior Felix without replacing them. Second, they have only three starters returning from last year's squad. Strangers can take a while to learn their role on the team, both on the field and in the clubhouse. The Jays should have won the AL East last year; they hit better than Boston and pitched at least as well. They were hurt by interpersonal problems, and it seems the club has tried to improve the situation. BOSTON is close behind. The Sox have one of the top offenses in all of baseball, and the East's second best pitching staff - a weak one that lacks depth in the starting rotation and a dependable closer in the bullpen. Jeff Reardon and Danny Darwin may discover that Fenway is inhospitable to pitchers on the decline. The other five teams in the division all have the same mediocre level of talent, and could finish in virtually any order. If all the potential in BALTIMORE is fulfilled, the Orioles will finish at least on top of the second tier of the East. The team relies heavily on "potential" stars, including four in the starting rotation. The team added two excellent veterans in the off-season, including 1B Glenn Davis, who can be expected to contribute about 35 home runs. Still, at least some of this poten-

tial is bound to fail. It should not be enough to push the Orioles below third place. Other than LF,:RF, and two spots in the starting rotation, CLEVELAND is solid at every position. There is such a lack of talent to fill those positions, however, that any team will be stiff competition for them. Other than these positions, there are few questions in Oeveland, so how they finish mostly depends on the success rate of Baltimore's rising stars. DETROIT is an easy pick: the offense should be among the best (with Boston), but the pitching may have a lock on worst. The winter additions of OF Rob Deer and C Mickey Tettleton to 1990's second best offense should push them over the top this year. The pitching was the worst in the league last year, and has only grown worse. With a huge offense and questionable pitching, it will be up to the other teams to beat them. The YANKEES could easily pass the Tigers if their starting pitching comes through. Here, New York's best hopes in the rotation are Scott Sanderson and Mike Witt Unlike the Tigers, at leasttheir pitching has a little hope. MILWAUKEE has more talent than Detroit, New York, Baltimore, or Oeveland. Yet they are plagued by injuries so consistently that another year of stars on the disabled list is a reasonable expectation. This is becoming too common to be a

coincidence. You would think that the front office would investigate and do whatever was necessary to solve the problem - perhaps a new trainer, fewer sprinkler heads in the outfield, softer toilet paper ...whatever. If they stay healthy, third place should be no problem, but I am picking them for the basement.

American League West The prevailing theory: because Oakland got swept in the World Series last year, they will not win the division this year. Unfortunately for the rest of the West, OAKLAND is just as good as they would be if they had won the World Series 4O. The A's still have the best pitching staff in the AL, includingthemanwho, in 1990, had the greatest season for a pitcher ever (no exaggeration): Dennis Eckersley. In 73 innings he struck out 73 and walked 4. He allowed five earned runs, and only 22 batters even got to three balls. Eckersley had the lowest earned run average (0.61) of any pitcher ever who pitched 25 innings or more. The offense, with RF Jose Canseco, LF Rickey Henderson and 1B Mark McGwire, may not be the best in the league, but this trio guarantees at least enough 1Jln production to win. Possible weaknesses: attitude, hitting atC, 2B, 3B, 55 and pitching from the fourth and fifth spots of the starting rotation and middle relief. Still, those are not enough reasons to think the A's will be anything but the best again. Sure, OIICAGOplayed over their heads last year, but they were 11 games ahead of the third-place Rangers. They have improved a little by adding P Charlie Hough and LF Tim Raines, and could finish second by winning 88 games, which should notbea problem. SEATTLE was third in pitching and second to last in hitting last year. They have done little to improve, but their young players have matured. That will be significant, especially for pitching ace Eric Hanson. Although the Mariners are still desperate for a shortstop and left fielder, the return of Jay Bubner in right field should be enough to help them edge out the Royals. KANSAS an's pitching will make them competitive. As long as BretSaberhagen is healthy, the starting rotation has talent and depth. Without him, they just have depth. The bullpen should be above average, even if Mark Davis does not rebound from injury. The problem is offense: Do not expect another batting title from George Brett, or an MVP (or even healthy) year from

Kirk Gibson. Kansas City's position is fourth best, but tenuous. CALIFORNIA was an average team last year, and consequently won about half of the time. 1991 will be a small improvement; OF Junior Felix should help, 3B Gary Gaettishould also contribute,and OFDave Winfield may even improve at age 39 (he returned from his year-long layoff with a slow April and May, but was hot for the last two months). Relief ace Bryan Harvey has the talent to help - he just has to utilize it. All these incremental improvements might even be enough to elevate the Angels into fourth place, but it is more likely they will reside comfortably in fifth. The only seriously deteriorating organization in the AL West is MINNESOTA. P Jack Morris and DH Chili Davis are significant additions, but do nothing to move the Twins toward a championship. The Twins need young talent, not aging fonner stars. They will compete with TEXAS for the cellar. The Rangers have four players who are better than average: Nolan Ryan and Bobby Witt at P, 2B Julio Franco, and RF Ruben Siena. With the possible exception of a healthy RP Jeff Russell, one can expect the Rangers to be overwhelmed by mediocrity.

National League East For the NEW YORK METS, the injury to P Sid Fernandez might be serious - after all, the only proven starters left are Dwight Gooden, Frank Viola, and Dave Cone. Seriously, though, their pitching should be the best in baseball. Though there were fourth in team ERA last year, they were only 0.06 earned runs per nine innings out of first. Their offense was the most , productive in baseball last year, scoring 775 runs - a miraculous feat for a National League team playing half their games in Shea Stadium, the worst hitters' park in the league. The Mets were probably the most talented team in the NL last year; this year, some of the offense left for L.A. with RF Darryl Strawberry, but Doc Gooden ought to return to form, and with their overwhelming pitching the Mets will easily score enough to win. PITTSBURGH could actually improve on their division-winning past year. Most important is the return of P John Smiley for a full, healthy season; plus, they will have Zane Smith for a full season. In 1990, the Pira tes, like the

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Mets, were virtually tied for first in pitching, and were second in hitting. Although they still lack a stopper, the pitching should improve, but Pittsburgh's hitting relies too much on the health of their starting eight If the Pirate hitters stay healthy, the Mets will face serious competition. Barring that, the Pirates' biggest concern will be the Cubs. OflCAGO may haveaetuallyput together a competent starting rotation thisseason-if PDannyJacksonstays healthy, that is.Jackson has not pitched a full season since 1988; in fact, 1988 was his only truly exceptional season. He is just unreliable. However, their other big off-season acquisition, LF George Bell, is reliable. Stadiums have a big effect on hit~ ters and pitchers. For example, since 1986, players have hit 24 percent more home runs in Wrigley Field than the average stadium. Bell will benefit from that, and might even be thinking about an MVP award come October. The starting pitching is still shaky, though, as is the bullpen (expect nothing from RP Dave Smith; pitchers in Wrigley suffer as the batters thrive). The Cubs oughtto finish third, looking over their shoulders at the Expos. Unlike Chicago, MONTREAL has a strong starting rotation and bullpen. They had the bestpitchingin theleague in 1990, but their offense finished ninth. Their big off-season move was to trade LF Tim Raines for LF Ivan Calderon and RP Barry Jones. This trade hurt them where they needed to improve: on offense. UnlessfuturestarsRFLany Walker and 2B Delino DeShields hit like superstars, lack of hitting should drag the Expos down to fourth place. If some of last year's promising young pitchers turn out to be flukes, 1991 could be even worse. Something went wrong for ST. LOUIS last year. Even their highly respected manager Whitey Herzog· could not figure out the problem, and retired. The organization's solution was to rejuvenate - they traded away the veterans and brought in promising

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talent from the minors. Rookies are tough to'predict, so the Cardinals are hard to evaluate for 1991. In any case, even future stars usually do not make a huge impact their first year, and many rookies with big reputations fail. I will pick the Cardinals for fifth while they sort out their talented new generation. PHILADEL· PHIAfinished tied for fourth in 1990,andhas done nothing to improve. They have some future in the ~~~ _ pitchingstaff,butthe - _ ,' ~"" O'_ hi tting is pathetic and getting worse. I think they played over their heads last year, and are destined for dead last in 1991. National League West The West should have the most competitive race in baseball. Three of six teams can compete for first place, and the winner will probably be whicheverteamgetshot. The edge right now goes to SAN DIEGO, which robbed Toronto of two superstars over the winter: 55 Tony Fernandez and 1B FredMcGriff. This trade alone should imDrove Padre hittine from avera2e to very good. With Andy Benes, Ed Whitson, and Bruce Hurst, the Padres also have one of the best starting pitching rotations in the division. Their problems are in middle relief and with thefourthand fifth starters. IfSan Diego finds good enough players to fill these roles, they could take the NL West crown. LOS ANGELES is very close behind, however. The addition of CF Brett Butler and RFDarryl Strawberry willsignificantlyimprove their already good hitting. The Dodgers also have two all-star pitchers in Ramon Martinez and Tim Belcher (if he's healthy), The restof the pitching staff, however, consists of .500 pitchers, and that might not be enough to win. The defending World Champion ONONNATI seem to suffer from a lack of quality starters; all they have are Jose Rijo and Norm Charlton, and

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HOUSTON traded its best player, Qanl)yJa~on~eW9Q~~~t , ;lBG\~nn DiJ:vis,'Wd,n,ow ~~ a firm almost tied for the league lead in ERA; ' grasp on last place. The Astros' hitting so they could repeat last year's trick. wastheworstin 1990,andhasdeclined Their obvious strength is in the bullpen: with the departure of Davis. Two of the Cincinnati has the two best relievers in four remaining dependable talents on the National League, Ron Dibble and the team, relievers Dave Smith and Randy Meyers. Unless one of their Larry Andersen, have also gone. All young pitchers that remain are C Craig Biggio, P Jim perhaps Jack DeShaies, and a smattering of Armstrong - fills unproven youngsters. Last place, and the hole in the startlikely to be the worst in baseball. - ing rotation, the pitching will deThe biggest change this year ought cline in 1991. Imto be a decrease in injuries, especially proved hitting will to pitchers. There was virtually no be needed for anspring training in 1990 (remember the other division title. lockout?), and that might have been SAN FRANOSCO will also be the reason so many pitchers went down competitive, but they only have one with injuries. dependable starter, Bud Black. There Another big change is salary are other pitchers that could potentially increases. Do three, four, or even five help, both old {Rick Reuchel), and million dollars per year for playing young (John Burkett), but as I said, baseball disgust you? Well, you can there is noone to depend on. In offense, blame me and other dedicated fans the personnel has declined; CF Willie such as yourself. Since 1971, players' McGee is a step down from Brett salaries have increased 1741 percent, Butler. Even without Butler,however, and 'IV revenues have increased 1742 the hitting should stay on par with last percent (or something like that - I year's. 1B Will aark should improve, don't remember the numbers exactly, and rookieC Steve Decker will at least but they are high and only 1% apart). The reason 'IV networks pay teams be better than the ancient backstops of 1990. But pitching will be bad enough more is because they can chargeadverto relegate the Giants to fourth - fifth tisers higher rates. The reason adverif the young Braves are early bloomers. tisers pay higher rates is that so many • In Vegas late last year, a friend of people watch baseball. It is really an mine bet on the ATLANTA Braves as incontrovertablecomment about what 200-to-110ng shots to win the division. we as a nation value; it is not exploitI think this was a wise bet, because ative greed. even though I do not anticipate they I am not saying that I am going to will offer any competition this season, stop watching basebalI- hey, I will I do expect them to compete in a couple even give Tom Monaghan $15 once in of years. They have better pitching than a while so I can watch his Tigers hit the Giants, with a lot of room for so~ homers and lose again. What I improvement John Smoltz is only 23, am saying is that I do not think players Tom Glavine is 25, and super-prosare greedy for taking money that would pect Steve Avery, at 20, is younger than otherwise belong to the owners, or that I and many of you. The infield is weak, owners are greedy for taking money but has some potential, and the outfield from advertisers. Ultimately, it all comes from the fans. has young stars Dave Justice and Ronnie Gant The Braves probably will But who cares? I go to the ballpark not win the division, but they will not to watch people play baseball, not to finish last And who knows, they may set moral standards for the world. surprise us. Baseball is good for one thing: fun. And it is definitely that. Tom Binkow is a junior in Englisl\ and Official Baseball Prognosticator for the Review. He was paid $1.8 milli~ for this article, but is holding out for more next year.

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 12

Book Review

The Victim's Revolution Haunts Education Illiberal Education Dinesh D'Souza The Free Press Hardcover, $19.95 319pgs. by John J. Miller One could hardly imagine Illiberal Education appearing at a more opportune moment than the present. Our nation has recently focused much of its attention upon the book's subject matter: the plight of higher education and the disease of "political correctness." Dinesh D'Souza's new book might even find a place alongside Allan Bloom's The Closing ofthe American Mind and E.D. Hirsch's Cultural Literacy, conservative tomes which in 1987 surprised everyone by inhabiting the bestseller lists for weeks. Appropriately enough,our nation could not have hoped for a better offering. D'Souza begins his book, subtitled liThe Politics of Race and Sex on Campus," with a laundry list of incidents embodying what he calls the "victim's revolution." He cites as evidence of this the different entrance requirements for students of different races at the country's top schools, the emergence of ideologically tinged Afr(}-American and women's studies departments and the ostracism of those who would dare question their intentions, and the new orthodoxy of "sensitivity" which crushes the individual rights of "intolerant" students. Insiders have known of these realities for years; D'Souza presents a well-documented, insightful account that will lend both coherence and eloquence to those who have tried to call attention to the gruesome details of modem campus

discuss a more widespread affliction. With the University of California at Berkeley, D'Souza critiques a system that attempts to shape the racial composition of the student body to reflect the state population at large. To this end,schoolslower admission standards for black and Hispanic students, but raise them for Asian-American applicants, who have generally experienced great amounts of success in our society. Not surprisingly, students gaining entrance through preferential treatment policies perform more poorly than their

life.

D'Souza targets six universities, and uses each one as a springboard to

peers - on average, they either take longer to graduate or fail to graduate entirely. D'Souza concludes that "American universities are quite willing to sacrifice the future happiness of many young blacks and Hispanics to achieve diversity, proportional representation, and what they consider multicultural progress." From Berkeley, D'Souza travels south to Stanford, which four years ago jettisoned its freshman Western civilization requirement because of an alleged white male bias. Students now must enroll in a requirement with a

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core reading list that includes the works of women and minorities. Comments D'Souza, ''Would Homerbevindicated if he were a Mongolian, Aquinas if he could demonstrate Peruvian heritage, Faulkner if he could unveil a black ancestor?" For a discussion of speech codes, the book concentrates upon the University of Michigan and its now infamous discriminatory harassment policy, which was ruled unconstitutional in 1989. Advocates of the speech code asserted that a student's right to an education free from "intimidation" outweighed any obligation to academic freedom that might entail the discussion of controversial topics, such as race and gender. Although our courts denied this claim, approximately 125 colleges and universities have implemented rules governing student speech. The U-M remains in this number with an "interim" policy that has been in effect for over 18 months. "It seems that a university that was once dedicated to maximum freedom of mind and conscience now finds itself struggling to guarantee the minimum freedom insisted on by the law," writes D'Souza. Other topics and places that undergo close and devastating scrutiny are student activism and "Afrocentric" curriculums at Howard University, faculty hiring and the study of literature at Duke, and academic freedom and thought control at Harvard. The chapters devoted to the problems of these particular institutions and Academia in general provide compelling evidence against the state of higher education today. At the end of this section, D'Souza grimly notes that ''Nobody will say so, but the truth is that a large number of students and faculty have simply had it with ... double standards and intimidation. Until they change their policies, universities are likely to see a dramatic increase in racial tension and racial incidents, with a corresponding upsurge of violence. The worst is yet to come."

As an observer and commentator, D'Souza is sharp, even-handed, and oftentimes witty. As a refonner, however, he leaves room for improvement. In the book's final pages, he sets forth three proposals that he believes could remedy the situations he describes: affirmative action based not upon race but socioeconomic factors, the elimination of university-funded, raciallyexclusive student groups, and a required course on equality and human difference for all freshmen. All of these entice, but only the second ultimately proves desirable and tenable. Concerning his modified affirmative action proposal, D'Souza inadequately explains how students with poor educational backgrounds could compete with their better-prepared peers. Since the "beneficiaries" of such a system would differ in no large way from those who take advantage of the one already in place, it hardly seems a cure for the ills wrought by preferential treatment policies. Universities should not be forced to compensate for educational disparities that occur at the elementary and secondary school levels. These areas should be the recipients of reform, possibly through innova tive programs like school choice or tax-base reform. Regarding the proposed course on equality and human difference, D'Souza unrealistically assumes that none of these classes would be taught by the "tenured radicals" he delights in exposing. D'Souza fails to show how this course would avoid the politicization and intellectual intolerance that currently diminish the quality of higher education. These, however, are minor complaints in an otherwise excellent book; Illiberal Education represents a powerful tool for those who wish to reverse current trends. The worst may be yet to come, but continued attention and consideration will eventually lead us forth from depravity. John J. Miller is a junior in English and editor-at-Iarge for the Review.

Politically Incorrect Dinesh D'Souza will be speaking at the U-M on Thursday, April 25 at 7:30 pm in the Anderson Room of the Michigan Union. The talk is sponsored by the Michigan Review and the American Enterpr~e Institute. Admission is free. ,

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 13

Speech Code Continued From Page 1 Judge Avern Cohn's decision, however, EMU legal advisors sought outside help in revising their code to meet Cohn's specifications. The result of this effort now stands as campus law at EMU. "We do not doubt the policy's constitutionality," said EMU attorney Kenneth McKanders. Despite his optimism, McKanders added a clause of severability to the policy that allows for the independent enforcement of each part of the policy, excepting any that may be found by a court to limi t free speech and expression beyond acceptable boundaries. Under the new policy, ''bad'' behavior is punishable in a variety of ways, from verbal reprimand to outright expulsion. The policy not only forbids derogatory speech, but other fonns of discriminatory harassment as well, including "fighting words"; violationofMichigan Law 750.l47b, which prescribes criminal and civil penalties for ethnic intimidation; behavior which presents a clear and present danger of "substantial disorder, violence, interruption of classes or material interference with the operation of the University"; or "extreme or outrageous" acts or communications intended to harass, intimidate, or humiliate the person at whom they are directed, causing that person "reasonably severe emotional distress." Unlike their neighbors in Ann Arbor, EMU officials were smart enough to abstain from disseminating booklets outlining acceptable and unacceptable student conduct under the code. While the benefits of such action may save the EMU policy from being declared unconstitutional, the policy as a whole is ultimately detrimental and unneces-

sary. The most obvious problem with the EMU policy is its vagueness. (The U-M policy, incidentally, was declared unconstitutional because it was vague and overly broad.) What is "substan-

tial disorder"? How can a person cause (or in some cases, avoid causing) "reasonably" severe emotional distress? Also, if students can be punished for non-verbal expression, then what might be sufficient to constitute such action? A dirty look? A misplaced wink? McKanders, after evading the issue at length, eventually cited "some type of gesture" as an example of punishable non-verbal expression. ''It is possible that there could be a situation in which all parts (of the policy) are present," he said. Dr. Bette White, EMU's dean of students, helped institute the new policy but refused an interview with the Review. Many students at Eastern question the need for the policy. "I think it will only hinder academic performance in the classrooms," said sophomore Ken Rieger." A student who tries to address a controversial issue in class may find himself being unjustly punished for expressing an idea that someone else found'intimidating.1II Thomas Marshall, an EMU grad uate student, said that he feels the policy is unnecessary. "I don' tthink anybody will pay attention to it," he said. "Why should they, when our state law advocates criminal penalties for ethnic intimidation and our Supreme Court has declared that the types of blatant violations the code hopes to prevent are not protected under the First Amendment anyway?" If all that various universities' policies try to sanction is already guaranteed at state and federal levels, why adopt discriminatory harassment policies in the first place? In EMU's case, Marshall states the reason is, in part, outside influence. "It has been said that if you walk with a cripple, you develop a limp. Unfortunately, I think Eastern's administration has been following in the crippled footsteps of the U-M a little too closely." How is it that U-M, EMU, and approximately 125 other universities

across the nation can continue to offer their studentS the higher education they deserve in the wake of restrictive speech and thought codes known collectively as harassment policies? Ultimately, the real victims of speech codes are the right to free speech and the notion put forth by the United States Supreme

Court that state universities should enjoy the fullest possible freedom for the dissemination of ideas. Stacey Walker is a sophomore in communication and a contributing editor for the Review.

Readers: April 29th is Regent Deane Baker's birthday. Knowing you would want to show your heartfelt appreciation if cards weren't so expensive, we took the liberty of making one for you. All you need to do is sign your name and send it to: 4944 Scio Church Rd., Ann Arbor, MI 48103

r----------Clip'NSend ' - - - - - - - - - - ,

Diploma Mills Continued From Page 9 degree becomes one' s birthright, rather than the product of years of academic effort, it has little worth. Instead of addressing the ca uses of lower minority performance in the schools, and looking at alternatives in primary and secondary education that may help, California'S lawmakers and educators are hurting the groups they intend to serve. It isn't likely the state's

taxpayers will continue to subsidize coleges and universities ot the tune of $11 billion a year if they are nothing more than diploma mills. Rick Henderson, formerly a senior editor of the Carolina Critic, is assistant managing editor of Reason magazine. This article was distributed by the Collegiate Network, a program of the Madison Center for Educational Affairs.

I I I I I

Dear Regent Baker, I realize you've had a rough time lately, what with the protests and all, so I just wanted to send you this little card to let you know that you are appreciated.

Happy Birthday

I I I I I I I I I I I

I Have a prosperous year and many more. I Sincerely, I L ____ ~~----~~~~----------~

..... ~~~~~*,'i".'.lo;''''~iUu'<tjok~\iI$'''''w.",~'A'',~'''''''',''<~'''_~,,''

The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 14

Book Review

Fred Zinn's Talking Laundry University Sketchpad Fred linn Non-books

Zinn's world become surrealistic antagonists who complicate the lives of his already befuddled student antiheroes. The bug-eyed, bespectacled wonks pushing self-preserving shantiesand the money machines that refuse to fund alcohol purchases are examples of Zinn's talent for seeing the absurd in

Softcover, $5.95 108pgs. by Adam Garaglola Fred Zinn is a popular cartoonist

for the Michigan Daily's Weekend magazine. Fans of his world of rightwing squirrels, talking laundry, and Grad library labyrinths that literally go to hell will find much of his most creative work in this volume. Zinn's healthful (and humorously) skewed vision of the world provides him with a fountain of truly original and entertaining ideas at a time when many of his peers are content to continue to beatthe theme of "college life" to death by their constant reiteration of worn outclicMs. Sure, Zinn deals with college life, but the college life he portrays in Sketchpad is a vision all his own. The characters, machines, and animals of

the mundane. Everything has the p0tential to create angst for his unsuspecting protag"nists: books talk, dirty laundry extorts money from its owner,

and even the squirrels have their own political agenda. Even when Zinn opts for the less f~iful, he still shows a keen wit and a fine sense of. satire. Messy rooms, all-night caffeine, and misplaced keys mark the misadventures of Sketchpad's characters. Zinn also makes good use of hyperbole in his pieces, humorously exaggerating both the direness of the situations he creates and the responses of his characters. The last section of the book is devoted to political cartoons, some of which are quite good. Zinn does, however, have a tendency treat his subjects heavy-handedly, perhaps in an overly earnest attempt to get a clear message across. His drawing style seems more staid here, and his creative insights constrained by the imperative of addressing an issue. Overall, though, Fred Zinn's collection reveals him as a witty and entertaining cartoonist with a fertile imagination and an amusing sense of

reality that alternately highlights the whimsical and the darkly comic. Adam Garagiola is a Residential College sophomore in creative writing and comparative literature and is the Review's literary editor.

Early Notice! Attention Students & Faculty Pay Your Parking Violations Before You Leave For The Summer GRADUATES: If you leave Ann Arbor with six or more unpaid parking violations you will be unable to renew your driver's license without payment. Take care of them now and avoid the hassle later! UNDERGRADUATES: Six or more unpaid violations can result in your vehicle being towed and impounded when you return in the fall, or your driver's license not being renewed. End the school year with a clean slate! Don't go home with tickets on your car! INFORMATION regarding your parking violations can be obtained from the Parking Violations Bureau, First Floor, aty Hall, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday, 994-2775. Richard J. Gary, aty Treasurer

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991, p. 15

Wall of Idiocy Continued From Page 5 tographs or artwork whatsoever. In addition, the "ad" contained the following disclaimer: "If you think this is far retd then you are a big, dumb idiot." Add to this the fact the the nominations were announced right on the heels of an article by a certain Review writer which was highly critical of both SAPAC and Steiner, and the picture becomes a whole lot clearer. When the "Sexist Ad" nominations were announced, I called the SAPAC office and asked the gal-Friday - er, I mean theadminstrativeassistant - who answered the phone why the Review's ad parody was included, and stated the information given above. I was told that I would ''have to speak to Julie Steiner, because she is in charge of that project." When I did speak with MissSteiner, she claimed that the nomination of the ad parody had nothing at all to do with the Review's recentharsh stance toward both herself and SAPAC. She stated that nominations were entered throughout the year l?y the general public, and that a SAPAC committee made the final selections. One only has to peruse the pages of the local press to find examples of sexist advertising much more offensive than the Review's ad parody (the accompanying photograph was taken from Ann Arbor Metro Times). If SAPAC sought to include an example of a certain type of advertising such as the recently popular ''Dial-a-Porn'' services to make a general point, one would think that a real ad, as opposed to a parody thereof, woUld have made the desired point more effectively. What point is SAPAC trying to make? It would seern that SAPAC, under the direction of Herr Steiner, is simply using U-M dollars to get back at the Review for daring to challenge its

In fact, almost everything I can being overpowered. There is something think ,of that comes out of SAPAC is sexy about not being able to just get opinionated, politically motivated, and away." highly debatable. Their "Myth/Fact" If SAPAC staffers want to live in presentations are a good example of their own little reality, that's fine with this. I never have trouble locating the me. But I find their efforts to force the ''Myth'' portion of these little ditties, rest of us to go along with them parbut I have yet to run accross a ''Fact.'' ticularly revolting. Do they think that This month's ''Myth/ if they blather this garFact" hand-out is parT bage long enough, ticularly silly. It warns ,>, ,: some rational person men to "Remember, co;', will actually believe it? operation does not , >:", If the U-Misreally equal consent." What, ." , interested in preventthen, does co-operation ing sexual assaults and mean? raising awareness, it . But wait, there's oughtto bring in some more. The same flyer ~. ,,;, < knowledgeable crimiamazingly groups the l.;" ,,' ~'l nal justice types, inword "persuasion" ~i ~:,., crease the number of right alongside ''beatdeputized officers on ing." ltimplies that un- Thisadwasrecentlyprinted campus, sponsor selfless the female practi~ with the caption "Be smug defense workshops, incally begs the male for about it." Come on... crease Safewalk, some loving, then he is indeed forcing Nightwalk and Night Owl services, her to do something she doesn't want. provide mace to those who want it, Interestingly, an expert on female and encourage the city to improve offsexuality recently contradicted the campus lighting. ideas represented in SAPAC' s flyer. In Unfortunately, people like Steiner the May, 1991 Pblyboy magazine, Miss and outfits like SAPAC appear more May herself says ''I like the feeling of interested in theory than reality. They """.')'.'/"'6

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Look what a Iittle extra credit can get YOU ~

endlessly politicize their personal pet peeves and force the rest of us to listen - ~4 pay for - their ranting and caterwauling. What is even more unfortunate is the fact that by kowtOwing to Steiner and SAPAC, the U-M is choosing not to seriously confront the issues involved in sexual assault prevention and awareness. Style over substance. Politics before practicality. It's a damn shame.

Jeft Muir is a junior in general studies and an executive editor for the Michigall Review. He was last seen being abducted by a horde of angry feminists. Fear not - we have a backlog of his columns ready for next fall

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zany dogma. As with a few other organizations on campus, SAPACappears to be more interested in headlines and exposure nw Toyotawith nothip~ down. than actually working to achieve the And no payments for ~~. mission it is charged with - sexual If yoo're a ~ gra:luate or about to be, ~'~ got assault prevention and awareness. some extracnrlit foryoo. It's the ~ a~ of '91Fmancing SAPACclaimsthat"sexist" ads lead to Progrnm And it oould put you in a ne.v ~ Vlith no money dcM'n and no payments for ~ da)s. That means yoo rouId sexual assault, but there is little data to soon be cruising in anyone of our quality C3IS and 1IlJdc;, back this up. And you may be assurred like the all-ne.v affordable 1eIreI,starting at jlN $6~~ that such data is highly controversial So hurry and sre your lbyola 00Iler tOOay for all the and heatedly debated. Similarly, if cWiIs, And who kIms, this extra cnrlit oould make yoo a real roads scholar OJ /oI>e wlwt you do for me~ Steiner wants to go around thinking ®TOYOTA normal, healthy men are really psychological rapists, fine. But this theory is merely one of Steiner's feminist fantasies, not a scientific or sociological Toyota or Ann Arbor 2867 Wasbtenaw Blvd. fact. I see no reason why the U-M and Ypsilanti, MI its students ought to pay for some nut to spew her pet theories and pursue ' Manuiaaultf',,"18I"fd reuiI pnce, ""u ~ de2itrprke may"'Y, _exdudes lJlft5.iloo1s<, If1J1!pOIUIioo. ~ ~ regioo1I~ f"lUl rol equi]>m<nl persbruilvendettaS. ·- - - - - - " -, . , - ,--_'_-_ "_"_-'_"_'_"_-_'_"_'_' _"_' _"_' _"_', _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _----1

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The Michigan Review, April 16, 1991,.p . 16

Music

Missa Luba: The Mass Out of Africa by Bud Muncher The life of a Review music writer is

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not the fun and games that readers, or for that matter, editors, perceive. Often, we work under grueling schedules and inhuman deadlines. We write our fingers to the word-processed bone, risk permanent deafness, and wander into drug-infested back-stages, all to guide you, the reader, into the mysterious world of new music. With this mission in mind, I want to share these musical discoveries: Kenya's Muungano National Choir's Missa Luba, Screaming Trees' Uncle Anesthesia, and Xymox's Phoenix.

Missa Luba Bud Muncher attended the University of Detroit Jesuit High where he was forced to sit through boring masses full of banal, soulless hymns. Missa Luba, or African Mass, is a far cry from those dry, relatively lifeless rituals. A collection of the five movements of the Catholic Mass, as well as 10 Kenyan folk melodies praising Christ, Missa Luba is an epiphanic journey into new sounds and cultures, and should only contribute to the euphoria surrounding "worldbeat" or non-Western music. The voices of the Muungano National Choir are heavily supported by

drums. The driving and inspiring rhythm patterns of the five movements of the Mass (Kyrie,Gloria, Credo, Sanctus, and Agnus Del) radically differentiate themselves from their Western counter-

parts. Following the Mass isa collection of Kenyan folk melodies which broaden the listener's appreciation of African music in general and Kenyan music in particular. The melodies featured in Missa Luba are not copies of South Africa's Ladysmith Black Mambazo's, or Paul Simon's Graceland. This is Afrcan folk in its purest form, perhaps as pure as the genre has to offer. The strength of Missa Luba is its reinterpretation of Western religious music-itis invigorating. Catholic ritual is so structured, so dull, that the sounds of Boniface Mganga's Kenyan choir are like a breath of fresh air. Serious worldbeat devotees should look into this package. Screaming Trees "We don't like the term 'psychedelic' because it evokes images of a band trying hard to be something from the past, which we're not,"said Screaming Trees' bassist Van Connor in Rocket magazine last summer. Still, the term is hard to avoid, if you have ever heard guitarist Gary Lee Connor's

mind-expanding guitar on albums like Buzz Factory and their latest release, Uncle Anesthesia. Just look at the cover of the new LP. A green, four-armed, fournippled creature, sitting on a mushroom, is hooked up to an oxygen tank and is taking blood intraveneously. With open arms, s/he looks upon a smiling girl who is holding a similar baby creature. But the band from Ellensburg, Washington are just a bunch of flannel-wearing, long-haired guys who make music they enjoy. So if Uncle Anesthesia is not a conscious attempt at psychedelia, they come very close. U1jCle Anesthesia is the band's first major label LP debut and includes 13 grungy guitar-rock tunes. Soundgarden' sChris Cornell c~pro d uced this solid collection of polished garage rock and even adds a recorder track to ''Lay Your Head Down." Lee Connor's sinister fretwork and Mark Lanegan's eerie vocal prowess power all the songs through, especially pieces like "Bed of Roses" and "Alice Said." Probably the strongest songs are the final three, ''Disappearing,'' "Ocean of Confusion," and "Ooser." Screaming Trees are scheduled to

perform at St. Andrews' Hall in Detroit onApri127. Xymox "Sometimes I worry about the idea that I need to make my loves, my lusts, my smallest victories and most insignificant defeats so much larger and more dramatic than they really are," said Ronny Moorings of Xymox, explaining the motive behind his-band's music. It is precisely that pompous, British, artsy-fartsy attitude which will make Xymox's new release, Phoenix, the soundtrack for lost 13-year olds in downtown Detroit's Shelter, but nowhere else. There is nothing that new on this LP. It is that same old dance music: recycled beats and pathetic EurOtechno accompanyment. So why should you go out and pay money for it? One good dance album per trend is all you need. That's what I say. Bud Muncher wears very smelly socks, but few people have the courage to tell him.

NOT ALLM8A'$ ARE CREATED EQUAL.

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