Military Press - June 1, 2015

Volume 39 • Number 10 • June 1, 2015

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TEHRAN remember when...

TAKES

OVER 5 3 9 1 Impeach Hillary?

Former SEAL says Congress can, and should

Page 8

• Military News ............................................6 • Entertainment ...........................................4 • Sports.......................................................... 13 • Remember When .............................. 10-11 • Just For Laughs ...................................... 14 • We Support Our Troops ...................16-17 • Classifieds/Crossword ......................... 18

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Distributed on the 1st and 15th of each month. Available aboard all San Diego County military bases, onboard in-port ships, at participating Albertsons, Ralphs and CVS Pharmacies. For more locations, visit www.militarypress.com/distribution The Military Press Newsmagazine is published semi-monthly on the 1st and the 15th by Military Press Newspaper, a commercial, free-enterprise newspaper. It does not necessarily reflect the opinion of the Department of the Navy and is no way associated with the Department of the Navy. The editorial objective of the Military Press is to promote support for a strong military presence. The opinions and views of the writers whose materials appear herein are those of the writers and not the publisher. Appearance of advertising does not constitute endorsement by the Military Press Newspaper. Consumers should make informed decisions when purchasing products and services, and when considering business opportunities, and research before investing. Subscription by mail is $50 per year to CONUS or FPO addresses.

By Riyadh Mohammed The Fiscal Times uring his address to a joint session of Congress, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu urged the U.S. to not be soft on Iran.

Then, 47 Republican senators wrote to the Iranian leadership to tell them that Congress will need to approve any deal President Obama may make with Tehran over its nuclear program. Finally, we had a senior adviser to the Iranian president saying that Iran has become a Middle Eastern empire — whose capital is Baghdad.

As U.S. politicians argue about how best to squelch Iran’s nuclear ambitions, the regime in Tehran is exerting itself in other ways, winning powerful influence in neighboring Iraq and across the Middle East.

If the U.S. doesn’t change its current stance on Iran, and challenge Tehran’s rising influence, peace in the region will be nearly impossible.

In the contest for regional dominance with the Sunni kingdom of Saudi Arabia, Iran’s Shiites have extended their reach and created what has been called an “arc of power” or a Shia crescent.

The Iranian sphere of power now stretches across Iraq, where Iran has joined in the fighting to beat back ISIS, to Syria, where the government in Tehran has worked to keep President Bashar al-Assad in power throughout the country’s 4-year-old civil war.

It stretches to Lebanon, where the Iranian-backed Hezbollah is the unquestioned power and is pushing to enter the political mainstream. And it has spread to Yemen, where Houthi rebels, a Zaidi Shia group, recently took control of the government.

When you look at the map of the Middle East, you don’t need to be an expert in geopolitics to realize that Iran’s influence has increased during the last few years while

D

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As the U.S. disengages, Iran exerts its influence

the U.S.’s role has diminished. The main reason is what politicians call “war fatigue.” Americans are tired of soldiers dying or being maimed for life, and suffer-

ing the long-term effects of PTSD. And the country has little patience for a long and expensive war.

That was before ISIS startTEHRAN, cont’d. on Page 16

Syria

Lebanon

Iraq

Iran

Israel Jordan Kuwait Egypt

Bahrain Qatar Red Sea

Saudi Arabia

Persian Gulf

UAE

Key Allies of Iran Saudi/Sunni Arab Block plus Israel Contested territory

Yemen

Gulf of Aden

200 miles

A Saudi-Iranian cold war?

Growing tension between Iran and Saudi Arabia has popularized talk of a new cold war in the Middle East. While the most influential regional powers in the Persian Gulf region take care not to get embroiled in direct conflict, they try to outflank each other by seeking allies among regional political forces, and through intense propaganda – hence the analogy with the cold war between the US and Soviet Union.

Iran vs. Saudi Arabia: Perfect enemies?

At its core, the IranianSaudi rivalry is about power and money: two oil-rich giants, vying for control of the Strait of Hormuz, a narrow water passage through which almost 20 percent of all oil traded worldwide passes (and 40 percent of all U.S. crude imports pass).

Iran and Saudi Arabia would always struggle to avoid collision, but ethnic and sectarian tension certainly doesn’t help. Iran is a majority Persian country

that belongs to the Shiite branch of Islam. The vast majority of Saudis are Sunni Arabs, with a Shiite Arab minority (about 10 percent).

The two governments are also ideological rivals.

Saudi royals have spent vast amounts of money funding the spread of the (Sunni) Wahabi school, an ultra-conservative, literal interpretation of Islam, which is the state religion in Saudi Arabia. The official title of the Saudi King includes the duty of the “Guardian of the Two Holy Places,” Mecca and Medina, suggesting a degree of divine authority.

The Islamic Republic of Iran, on the other hand, has promoted its version of political Islam, a combination of elected republican institutions under the guidance of a Muslim cleric, the Supreme Leader.

The founder of the Iranian regime, Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, condemned the Saudi monarchy as a tyrannical, illegitimate clique that answers to Washington, rather than to God.

June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 3

5 must-see summer movies ‘Spy’ (June 5)

Moviefone.com Summer is the season of blockbuster hits, and 2015 is no different. From genetically-engineered dinosaurs, to a degenerate talking bear and the return of the Griswalds, this summer’s mainly about sequels. But there’s also plenty of new movies, incuding a romp with Melissa McCarthy. Here’s a preview of what we’ll be watching.

When you think of smooth secret agents, chances are the first person that pops into your head is not Melissa McCarthy. And that’s what makes “Spy” such a wonderful surprise. The movie follows McCarthy’s Susan Cooper, a CIA office drone who is sent into active duty when her James Bond-ish partner (Jude Law) runs into trouble. It’s a wonderful premise, ripe for comedic possibility. This is going to be a huge smash and a potential franchise-starter.

‘Jurassic World’ (June 12)

With “Jurassic World” comes the fulfillment of something audiences have wanted to see since the first “Jurassic Park” opened in 1993: the futuristic theme park, populated by genetically reconstituted dinosaurs, is finally open to the public.

In “Jurassic World,” the theme park has been operating for many years without incident, to the point that the park’s brass thumbs its nose at nature further by creating a super-dinosaur to attract

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new guests. This creature, the Indominus rex, of course, gets loose and ruins everyone’s vacation. Among the human characters in “Jurassic World” are Chris Pratt, as a dinosaur tamer named Owen Grady, and Bryce Dallas Howard, as the greedy operations manager Claire Dearing.

What made the first film so magical was the idea of dinosaurs interacting with modern technology, and this should replicate that idea to an unbelievable degree. We can’t wait to go to the park.

‘Ted 2’ (June 26)

How do you come back from the colossal back-to-back failure of a disastrous gig hosting the Oscars and the box office bomb “A Million Ways to Die in the West?” If you’re Seth MacFarlane, you return to the world of “Ted,” a midsized, high-concept comedy that wound up making $550 million worldwide.

The sequel, once again starring Mark Wahlberg, with MacFarlane returning as the voice of his childhood stuffed bear Ted, focuses on a legal battle between Ted and the United States legal system as he fights to be declared human. Original cast member Mila Kunis has been replaced by Amanda Seyfried (battle of the big eyes!), with Jessica Barth and Giovanni Rabisi returning.

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For one, you get the history of the minions (they always assist whatever the evilest thing around is) and for another, the movie is largely set in the ’60s and follow the minions and their interaction with Scarlet Overkill (Sandra Bullock). The cast is aces (Michael Keaton, John Hamm and Steve Coogan also provide voices) and it will be fun to see characters who have been relegated to a supporting role take center stage.

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Nobody seems to know anything about the revamp of “National LamMOVIES, cont’d. on Page 18

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Rumer Willis crowned ‘Dancing’ champion Rumer Willis became a celebrity in her own right on season 20 of “Dancing With the Stars.”

On the grand finale of the hit ABC reality show, it was she who took home the mirror ball trophy with partner Val Chmerkovskiy as her famous parents Bruce Willis and Demi Moore cheered in the audience. Musician Riker Lynch finished second, and war hero Noah Galloway came in third.

When asked how proud he was of Rumer, dad Bruce smiled to FOX411 backstage, “As proud as you can be.”

Although she excelled all season, Rumer told reporters after the show that she couldn’t believe it when she heard her name called as the winner.

“I had this moment where I was like, wait, does that mean we were eliminated or we’re not?,” she said. “Oh, wait, O.K., we won! Oh my gosh! This is awesome!”

Chmerkovskiy, who’s been dreaming of a first-place finish for years, said, “I was like, ‘Please, please, let me hear it how I heard it in my sleep.’ It finally happened.”

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Miramar wins Federal Green Challenge

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Marine Corps Air Station Miramar received the 2015 EPA Federal Green Challenge award for Energy, after having the greatest percentage reduction in energy use nationally.

The station cut its fuel consumption by 98 percent in 2014 by building a new aircraft hangar which brought a natural gas system to the installation and eliminated the old diesel fuel system.

The new facility features a new Zinc Bromide Flow Battery for renewable energy storage to support energy security and cost savings through peak load reduction. The battery has 250KW/1 MWH capacity, is 40 feet long, 10.5 feet tall and 8 feet wide.

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Homefront names new president

Retired Air Force Brig. Gen. John I. Pray, Jr., became president and CEO of Operation Homefront on May 18. Pray, 56, most recently held several leadership roles with the United Service Organizations and served as its interim president and CEO in 2014.

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More heads need LIPO & BREAST to roll at the VA

By Pete Hegseth Concerned Veterans for America little more than a year ago, Department of Veterans Affairs Secretary Eric Shinseki resigned following a series of scandals exposing management failures, fraud and corruption throughout the department he led. It was an honorable step taken to allow new leadership to begin repairing what had gone so wrong at the dysfunctional department.

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toxic culture arisen in the second-largest federal department? The answer is that this is what happens in a culture where there are no consequences for misconduct or poor performance. It’s time for real accountability at the VA. Last summer, Congress passed a landmark VA reform bill that included stronger accountability provisions empowering the VA secretary to fire senior employees who failed to perform.

President Obama signed that bill into law in August with great fanfare.

It’s now clear those reforms did not go far enough. Congress should take

Very little has changed at the VA. How has such a toxic culture arisen in the second-largest federal department? ployee to face repercussions for the scandals. One year later, not only have things failed to improve — they’ve grown worse. In fact, only a handful of VA executives have been removed from their job — and none fired for cause for the wait list scandal.

It is painfully clear that the dynamic will not change at the VA until the department embraces an ethic of true accountability for failing and underperforming workers. A new bipartisan reform effort in Congress, led

by House Veterans Affairs Committee Chairman Jeff Miller (R-Fla.), is a step in that direction.

Even longtime critics were taken aback when department whistleblowers revealed in April 2014 how veterans in VA hospitals were kept on secret waiting lists and denied care from doctors for months, while department officials pocketed hefty bonuses for “performance.”

What has been even more shocking, though, has been to learn how deep the rot goes.

Day after day, we continue to see a relentless stream of new revelations of VA failures, abuse and shoddy service to veterans. Unfortunately, very little has changed at the VA. How has such a

the next logical step to expand this firing authority to all VA employees, not just senior executives. Only when those at the top, middle, and bottom are held to the same simple and fair standard of basic accountability can the culture start to change.

Miller’s bill, the VA Accountability Act, would do just that, by giving the secretary authority to immediately remove any employee who is guilty of misconduct and shortening the amount of time to appeal that firing.

This last part is needed to ensure that fired employees don’t milk the appeals system for months upon months of paid leave.

“It’s wrong that it takes this long to fire people responsible for poor treatment of veterans,” Democratic Rep. Kyrsten Sinema of Arizona said in an April 30 news conference in Washington, D.C. “We have to change the system and the culture. Bad actors should be held accountable, and those doing good work should be commended.”

VA Secretary Robert McDonald claims he’s working to get rid of bad employees, but that Congress needs to change the law to allow it to happen more quickly. Should the VA AccountVA, cont’d. on Page 9

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June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 7

Impeach Hillary? It can, and should, be done

By Larry Bailey CAPT (SEAL), USN (Ret.) Hillary Clinton must be impeached.

You read that right: Hillary Clinton must be impeached by the United States Congress.

This is the best way to reprimand Hillary Clinton for her lawless behavior as Secretary of State and prevent her from holding “any Office of honor, Trust or Profit under the United States” per Article I, Section 3, Clause 7 of the Constitution.

Congress can — and must — impeach and disqualify Hillary Clinton from entering any and all offices in the United States.

The fact that Hillary is out of public office does not prohibit Congress from successfully exercising its constitutional power to impeach her for her actions as Secretary of State, for her involvement in the Benghazi terror attack, for

her illegal handling of official emails and for her reception of foreign funds as a sitting officer of the United States.

Fact is, “late impeachment” — or, the impeachment of an officer after he or she has vacated office — is rooted in English common law, is constitutionally valid and has been pursued by the U.S. Congress before.

Former President and U.S. Rep. John Quincy Adams famously defended late impeachment — and its power to disqualify the impeached from holding office.

“Every officer impeachable by the laws of the country, is as liable, 20 years after his office has expired, as he is whilst he continues in office,” he said. “And if such is not the case, if an officer could thus ward off the pains of impeachment, what would be the value of the provision?”

In 1876, precedent was set for late

impeachment, when the U.S. House of Representatives successfully impeached Secretary of War William Belknap after he resigned from his post in attempts to shirk punishment.

The debate over late impeachment lasted weeks, but the House was suc-

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cessful and sent Belknap to be tried by the U.S. Senate.

The House of Representatives has the power right now to do the right thing by impeaching and disqualifying Hillary Clinton from holding any office of “honor, trust, or profit” in the United States.

If the U.S. House rightly impeaches Hillary for committing “high crimes William Belknap, imand misde- peached in 1876. meanors” as Secretary of State, her presidential aspirations would be permanently ended.

As then House Judiciary Committee Chairman J. Proctor Knott pronounced in the Belknap incident, disqualifying a “single convicted criminal” isn’t the sole purpose of impeachment. Rather, “the great object, after all, was that his infamy might be rendered conspicuous, historical, eternal, in order to prevent the occurrence of like offenses in the future.”

“The purpose,” said Knott, is ”to teach (other officials) that if they should fall under like temptations they will fall, like Lucifer, never to rise again.”

This 114th Congress must match the strength of the 44th Congress’ collective resolve against executive corruption.

Rally members of Congress to stand upon the Constitution — and legal precedent — and DISQUALIFY Hillary Clinton from all offices in the United States.

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VA

Cont’d. from Page 7 ability Act be passed into law, McDonald and his leadership team will have no excuses for dragging their feet.

Once these reforms are in place, Congress and veterans organizations should watchdog the implementation to ensure the accountability provisions are put to work as intended. The VA has a history of poor execution when it comes to reform, and should be held to account in making these changes a reality.

Nor should Obama get a free pass — thus far, his administration has offered little more than lofty talk about the need for reform, rather than results.

This failure has been particularly disappointing, given how assertive officials were last year in promising change.

“This (VA reform) is going to be a slow grind,” a senior administration official told The New York Times. “A lot of the problems, they are not just systemic, but they are chronic. It’s like, roll up your sleeves, start digging into the culture and get rid of people who are impeding necessary change.”

Government employee unions can be expected to oppose these accountability measures. But their opposition amounts to little more than a reactive defense of poor performers and excuses for official misconduct.

That opposition means members of Congress will have a choice: They can choose to honor the basic dignity of veterans who have served this nation in uniform by supporting accountability.

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Or they can elect to allow corrupt and abusive employees to remain on the government payroll in perpetuity, without facing consequences for misconduct.

But there is no way to choose both — so it’s time to roll up your sleeves and choose the side of accountability.

Hegseth is the CEO of Concerned Veterans for America and a Fox News contributor. A U.S Army infantry veteran, he served tours in Afghanistan, Iraq and Guantanamo Bay. HEALTH

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Franklin Delano Roosevelt 32th U.S. President Served from March 4, 1933 to April 4, 1945

“The only limit to our realization of tommorrow will be our doubts of today.”

— Franklin Roosevelt

John “Cactus Jack” Garner 32nd U.S. Vice President Served from March 4, 1933 to Jan. 20, 1941 World events

• The Italian colonies of Tripoli and Cyrenaica join to create the country of Libya on Jan. 1.

• Aviator Amelia Earhart becomes the first person to fly solo across the Pacific Ocean on Jan. 11. The flight, from Honolulu to Oakland, also made her the first to fly solo across both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.

• Germany reinstates its air force, the Luftwaffe, on Feb. 26, violating the terms of the 1919 Treaty of Versailles.

Hitler would announce full re-armament on March 16.

• A 7.7 magnitude earthquake hits Quetta, Balochistan, British India (now Pakistan) in the early hours of May 31, killing between 30,000 and 60,000.

• Briton Sir Malcolm Campbell sets the land speed record Sept. 3 on the Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah. Campbell and his car, “Bluebird,” broke the 300 mph barrier, surpassing his previous world record of 276.82 mph set ealier that year.

• The China Clipper takes off Nov. 22 from Alameda to deliver the first airmail across the Pacific Ocean. The flying boat took more than 110,000 pieces of mail to its final destination, Manila, Philippines.

U.S. News

• The first official Orange Bowl is held Jan. 1 in Miami. The Bucknell University Bisons defeated The University of Miami Hurricanes, 26–0.

• Mickey Mouse appears in technicolor for the first time with the release of the animated short “The Band Concert” on Feb. 23.

• Porky Pig debuts March 9 as the first major Looney Tunes character in the Merrie Melodies short “I Haven’t Got a Hat.” • Congress passes The Emergency Relief Appropriation Act on April 8, creating the Works Progress Administration, or WPA, with $4.9 billion in funding.

• The first nighttime Major League Baseball game is played May 24 at Crosley Field in Cincinnati between the Reds and the Philadelphia Phillies.

• Slugger Babe Ruth hits his 714th, and final, home run May 25 at Forbes Field in Pittsburgh. Playing for the Boston Braves, Ruth went four for four on the day, hitting three home runs and driving in six. The Braves lost, though, to the Pirates, 11–7. Ruth will play his last game May 30.

• The Boulder (Hoover) Dam is completed May 29 and dedicated Sept. 30, after just three years of construction.

• President Roosevelt signs the U.S. Social Security Act on Aug. 14, providing unemployment compensation and pensions for the elderly. The first Social Security taxes won’t be collected until 1937.

• The strongest hurricane to hit the United States makes landfall Sept. 2

1935 Delahaye 135 Babe Ruth hits his final home run.

10 June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS

remember when...

5 3 19

1935 Mercedes-Benz Luxury Roadster

AVERAGE COST OF LIVING

BORN THIS YEAR: Elvis Presley, musician, actor (Jan. 8).

Above left: Julie Andrews, actress (Oct. 1); Dalai Lama 14th, leader (July 6); Sonny Bono, musician, politician (Feb. 16); Woody Allen, director, actor (Dec. 1).

in the Florida Keys. The Category 5 storm kills 423.

• Earl W. Bascom and his brother Weldon produce the first night rodeo held outdoors under electric lights at Columbia, Miss., on Sept. 25.

• Parker Brothers releases Monopoly in the U.S. on Nov. 5.

Technology 1935

• Toyota produces its first cars, the A1 passenger car and the G1 truck, as a division of Toyoda Automatic Loom Works.

• Coopers Inc. sells the world’s first men’s briefs, as “jockeys,” in Chicago on Jan. 19.

• The first canned beer is sold Jan. 24 in Richmond, Va.,

by Gottfried Krueger Brewing Company.

• Robert Watson-Watt first demonstrates the use of radar to detect aircraft Feb. 26 at Daventry, England.

• The world’s first parking meters are installed in Oklahoma City on July 16.

Movies

• Suicide Squad • The Bride of Frankenstein • The 39 Steps • Mutiny on the Bounty • Top Hat • Captain Blood • A Tale of Two Cities • A Night at the Opera • A Midsummer Night’s Dream • The Call of the Wild

• Income per year ........ $1,600 • Minimum wage ............... N/A • New house ................ $3,450 • Monthly rent ..................... $22 • New car ......................... $625 • Gallon of gas ................... 19¢ • Dozen eggs ..................... 37¢ • Gallon of milk ................... 47¢ • Loaf of bread ...................... 8¢ • First-class stamp ............... 3¢ • Movie ticket ..................... 24¢

Music

• Fred Astaire, “Cheek to Cheek” • Eddy Duchin, “Lovely to Look At” • Shirley Temple, “On the Good Ship Lollipop” • The Carter Family, “Can the Circle be Unbroken” • Bing Crosby, “Silent Night, Holy Night”

1935 Dodge Touring Sedan First canned beer debuts.

June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 11

Navy honors Sailors of the Year WASHINGTON (NNS) – The Navy’s 2014 Sailors of the Year (SOY) were meritoriously advanced to chief petty officer during a ceremony held at the Navy Memorial, May 14.

Chief of Naval Operations Adm. Jonathan Greenert served as guest speaker at the pinning ceremony hosted by Master Chief Petty Officer of the Navy Mike Stevens.

The four Sailors of the Year honored at the ceremony are: Construction Mechanic 1st Class Jimie Bartholomew, representing U.S. Navy Reserve; Steel Worker 1st Class Brenton Heisserer, representing U.S. Navy Shore; Boatswain’s Mate 1st Class Joe Mendoza representing U.S. Fleet Forces; and Logistics Specialist 1st Class Blanca Sanchez, representing U.S. Pacific Fleet.

Greenert began by thanking the

sailors for their dedication — a dedication that is now being justly rewarded.

“Congratulations to our selectees I’m very proud to be here today and I’m very proud of you,” Greenert said.

“For those of us who are serving and nearing the twilight of our career, we wonder about the future and will people be here ready to stand up. And you represent, as you know, a whole host of Sailors who are out there who will take the mantle, and it makes us feel very good about our future in the Navy and in our military, so once again, thank you.”

Greenert also took a moment to remind the SOYs to be grateful for their families — ‘the wind beneath their wings’ and noted a shared unique characteristic of the 2014 Sailors of the Year — they are all representatives of the Navy’s expeditionary community.

Chief Construction Mechanic Jimie Bartholomew, one of four Sailors of the Year, receives his cover during the 2014 Sailor of the Year promotion ceremony at the Navy Memorial. (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Eric Lockwood) “It shows you how our Navy is evolving — expeditionary ratings are our Sailors of the Year,” Greenert said.

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“It’s a natural progression to who we are today and [it shows] as we look out to the future, the significance of these ratings and what they do, and how all Sailors have a very important part in what we do.”

Before the sailors had their anchors pinned to their collars and combination covers placed on their heads, Greenert offered a piece of advice, reminding them of the gravity of the responsibility entrusted in them as deckplate leaders.

“My only advice is — you’ve always wondered ‘will someone please listen to me?’ Well let me tell you folks, they are now,” said Greenert. “Everything you say.”

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Mayweather vs. Pacquiao 2?

By Matt Fitzgerald Bleacher Report Floyd Mayweather Jr. defeated Manny Pacquiao by unanimous decision in May 2’s superfight, and the two camps are reportedly in talks to make a rematch happen.

Richard Johnson of Page Six reports that the two best welterweight boxers of their generation are already gearing up to square off again — even if everyone involved denies it in public.

“It’s already being negotiated,” said a source to Johnson. “The fight will be the first event at the under-construction MGM–AEG Arena set to open next year.”

The motives for Pacquiao are quite obvious — he wants another crack at Mayweather off his initial loss, after which it was revealed Pac-Man fought with a significantly torn right rotator cuff.

Johnson reports Pacquiao needs

four months of rehab on his arm once he undergoes surgery and three months thereafter to train.

“He feels he fought with only one arm,” said another source to Johnson about Pacquiao’s recent defeat.

Although this runs contrary to Mayweather’s previously stated intentions to retire following the last fight on his current contract this September, per Showtime Sports, he will reportedly take on Pacquiao again because of the financial gains to be had. That’s one reason Mayweather’s nickname is “Money.”

Mayweather improved to 48-0 overall and could be in for a stiffer challenge whenever this rematch does go down provided Pacquiao is fully healthy and healed. Another triumph would add a great deal to Mayweather’s legacy, but redemption for Pacquiao could even set up a third decisive showdown.

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June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 13

and watch the kids play kickball in the park everyday.

Everyday he would get sadder and sadder knowing he could not play kickball, because he had no legs. So one night he prayed to God for legs and feet.

The next morning he woke up to find he had legs and feet.

He was so happy, he ran outside to play kickball. While he was playing kickball, the ball kept going into the street. He got sadder and sadder knowing he could not pick up the ball, because he had no arms and hands.

Right there and then he prayed to God for arms and hands.

All of the sudden he had arms and hands. He was so happy. The next time the ball went into the street he said, “I’ll get it!

I’ll get it!”

He rushed into the street to get the ball, and as he was leaning down to pick it up, a car screeched around the corner, ran him over and killed him.

The whole moral of the story: QUIT WHILE YOUR A HEAD!

Just for Laughs

Careful what you wish for

There once was this lady that could not have kids. She prayed to God for a baby, and God answered her prayer — but the child was just a head. So she decided to love the head just as much as any other kid.

Well, when the head got older and older, he would sit on a pillow atop a stool, and look out across the street REAL ESTATE

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Sticker shock

A lady walks into a Lexus dealership.

She browses around, spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, she very loudly passes gas!

Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident, and hopes a sales person doesn’t pop up right now. As she turns back, there standing next to her is a salesman.

“Good day, madame,”he says. “How may we help you today?”

Very uncomfortably she asks, “Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?”

He answers, “Madame, I’m very sorry to say that if you passed gas just touching it, you are going to s--t when you hear the price.”

An ear full

There was a man who was in a car accident. Because of the accident, he had to have his ears amputated. The insurance company gave him money because of this odd injury, and when he got the money he decided he was going to start a computer firm. But then the man realized that he had no clue how to run a business.

He picked three candidates to run his firm, and he was going to pick the person he liked most.

The first candidate was great. “I’m almost sure I’m going to pick this guy,”said the man with no ears to himself. Then, at the end of the interview, the man asked the candidate one more question.

“Do you notice anything about me?” said the man.

“Yeah, you have no ears.” With this, the man got mad and kicked him out.

Then, he interviewed the second man, and he was even better than the first. The last question he asked the second man was: “Do you notice anything about me?”

“Yeah, you have no ears.” The earless man then kicked that man out of his house.

The third candidate was better then the first and second men put together.

No matter what, he was going to pick this man. The last question the man with no ears asked the third candidate was: “Do you notice anything about me?”

“Yes,”said the third person. “You’re wearing contacts.”

“Why, yes!” said the man. “You’re very right! How did you know that?”

The man replied: “You can’t wear glasses if you don’t have ears!”

Americans do it better

Three men were sitting in a bar, one Frenchman, one Italian and one American. The Frenchman said, “Last night I made love to my wife four times, and this morning she kept telling me how much she worshipped me.”

So the Italian said, “Well, I had sex with my wife six times last night, and this morning she was too exhausted to speak.”

The American remained silent, so the Frenchman smugly asked, “So, how many times did you have sex with your wife last night?”

“Once,” the American replied.

“And what did she say this morning?” asked the Italian.

“DON’T STOP!”

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What plastic surgery can do for the military William J. Seare, M.D. Board Certified Plastic Surgeon any members of the military don’t realize what plastic surgeons can accomplish for our military community in San Diego.

The military stresses fitness and body composition. What few people realize is, it may be difficult — or impossible — to control growing fat while maintaining their performance criteria. This is because our ancestors had a genetic upgrade we call lipodystrophy fat. Unlike general body fat, lipodystrophy fat does not respond to diet and exercise. This fat was helpful in getting our ancestors through the famines, ice ages, wars and conflicts. This fat is modulated by the stress hormone cortisol, which is out of control in our modern day lives. This fat became their personal MREs, thermal insulation and internal armor. This fat allowed them to survive, reproduce and compete with younger tribe members for valuable resources.

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General body fat is the regular body fat that can respond to diet and exercise. It is typically found in everyone’s faces, hands, feet and ankles. This general body fat can be best assessed by measuring the inner arm and forearm with a pinch test. A half-inch pinch is typical for the average adult male and female. Most of my military patients have much less than a half inch of pinch. As

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far as general body fat, they can actually be slightly anorexic. This may sound crazy when someone has three inches of pinch on their belly fat, but their faces will usually appear gaunt, with very little fat covering other parts of their bodies such as their legs and forearms.

The lipodystrophy fat can be way out of proportion with the general body fat. It can be quite frustrating for someone to loose lipodystrophy fat because typically it only responds to long-term restrictions that greatly affect muscle mass, endurance, thinking and resistance to infection.

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Cont’d. from Page 3 ed kidnapping Americans and chopping off their heads, burning people alive and destroying ancient artifacts that can never be recovered.

Americans like to see the world in simple terms — good guys and bad guys. South Korea — good, North Korea — bad. But in the Middle East, there are not white hats and black hats — just 100 shades of grey.

Losing Iraq

In Iraq, the U.S. has competed with Iran since the Saddam Hussein era.

The U.S. is the super international power while Iran is the dominant regional one in the Persian Gulf. One crucial date for the Iranian influence in Iraq was the country’s first general election in January 2005, which brought to power a Shiite coalition that, along with the Kurds, also drafted the Iraqi constitution.

Ever since, Iran’s ambassador to Baghdad was no less important than his American counterpart. When U.S. forces left Iraq in December 2011, the Iranian influence in Iraq overshadowed the American one.

When President Obama declined to help Iraq, an ally with a democratically elected — though corrupt — government as ISIS was marching to Baghdad in June 2014, it was another turning point for Iran.

No country was willing to help other than Iran. It sent advisers and weapons that enabled Iraq to breathe and to prevent the fall of Baghdad.

The Syria-Iran Connection

For three decades, Syria was Iran’s best friend in the Middle East. But at the onset of the Syrian revolution four years ago, the Assad regime began killing its own people. As the horrific death toll began to climb, Syrians, Arabs and Muslims, as well as some Americans — all wanted the U.S. to intervene.

In 2012, Sen. John McCain (RAZ) called for the U.S. to go to war and establish a safe haven for the Syrian rebels with a no fly zone over Syria.

But Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Gen. Martin Dempsey pushed back, claiming military action would cost U.S. taxpayers billions.

When Gen. David Petraeus, then director of the CIA, and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton suggested a plan

16 June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS

to arm the Syrian rebels in 2012, Obama rejected it. Even when Assad crossed the red line Obama had drawn by gassing his own people several times in 2013, Obama simply negotiated a deal with Assad to hand over his arsenal of chemical weapons. That was no help to the 200,000 Syrians who were killed by Assad’s conventional weapons.

How the Door Opened Wide to Terrorism

The inability to confront Assad in any meaningful way opened the door for al-Qaeda and ISIS, the two terror groups, to try to build their own emirates in Syria. It also made the Assad regime more dependent on Iran and Hezbollah, Iran’s strong ally in Lebanon, to curb the al-Qaeda and ISIS offensives.

While Syria was a former ally of Iran, today, it is more or less its proxy. Hezbollah has similarly shifted from a Shiite force supported by Tehran into Iran’s surrogate.

Yemen

When his people finally rose up against him in 2011 as part of the Arab Spring, the corrupt dictator Ali Abdullah Salih killed his nation’s youth on the streets for almost a year until a

deal was arranged so he could step down without fear of prosecution.

In his last decade in power, Salih launched a war against the Houthis, a rebel movement of the Zaidi Shiites, who make up a little less than half of Yemen’s population. Iran supported them, as it did the Iraqi and Lebanese Shiites.

When Salih stepped down, his successor was his respected and reformminded vice president.

Shielded by his immunity deal, Salih conspired with the Houthis to destabilize his successor’s government, and while the world was watching helplessly, the Houthis captured the capital in September 2014.

A few months later they forced the new president to resign and then flee to Adin in the south. Overnight, a leader who was a legitimate ally in the war against terrorism was toppled by a militia supported by Iran — all while the Obama administration was almost completely silent.

What to do now

Iran’s nuclear program is the main issue over which Israel and Saudi Arabia have expressed concerns. In 1981, the Israeli air force attacked the Iraqi

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Israel wanted to do the same with Iran in 2008. President George W. Bush refused to cooperate with that scenario. Saudi Arabia tried to persuade the U.S. to bomb Iran in the same year.

Bush declined again.

Iran will eventually acquire the ability to produce a nuclear bomb. A surprise attack on Iran’s nuclear sites is no guarantee to success and will definitely provoke an angry Iranian reaction.

The current sanctions and negotiation course is not only the best plan the U.S. has, but it is probably the only one that could work.

The administration could try to strengthen the pragmatic elements of the Iranian regime and convince them that even if they can produce a nuclear weapon, it is better not to do so.

Iran’s influence in the Middle East is greater today than it was six years ago. This is mostly due to the Obama administration’s disengagement with that region.

It is possible to undo that. If Obama started engaging in the Middle East’s issues, Iran’s emerging era could end before it really takes hold.

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poon’s Vacation” except Warner Bros., but we’re excited about it. now-grown Rusty Griswold (Ed Helms), as he and his family (Christina Applegate plays his wife), along with the rest of the extended Griswold clan (Chevy Chase and Beverly D’Angelo return; Leslie Mann plays Audrey, with Chris Hemsworth essaying her husband) make a final pilgrimage to Wally World, which is on the cusp of closing forever. The new film was written and directed by John Francis Daley and Jonathan Goldstein, two of-the-minute comedy writers with somewhat spotty track records (“Horrible Bosses 2” anyone?) but, hopefully, the ability to revive the long-dormant franchise.

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18 June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS

ACROSS 1. Handout 5. Ringworm cassia 10. Resorts 14. African antelope 15. Electronic letters 16. Protagonist 17. Canvas 18. Instigator 20. Roomette 22. Add water 23. One of the tribes of Israel 24. Runs in neutral 25. Pertaining to housing 32. Borders on 33. Eagle’s nest 34. Gorilla 37. Departed 38. Last 39. Close 40. Autonomic nervous system 41. A boneless steak 42. Heart artery 43. Self-restraining 45. Anxiety 49. Dawn goddess 50. Large spotted feline 53. Part mortal and part deity 57. Filled to excess 59. Overhang 60. Not there 61. Courtroom event 62. Close violently 63. Backside 64. Pizazz 65. Story

DOWN 1. Specks 2. By mouth 3. Stringed instrument 4. Hasten 5. Calm 6. Arab chieftain 7. Indian bread 8. Near 9. Friend 10. Pottery fragment 11. Foot lever 12. Mountain crest 13. Open skin infections

19. Ancient Roman magistrate 21. Cushions or mats 25. Indian music 26. Black, in poetry 27. Stars 28. Manicurist’s concern 29. Basic belief 30. Angry 31. Be unwell 34. Relating to aircraft 35. A Maori club 36. Historical periods 38. Lie 39. Loudest

41. Deadly 42. “Smallest” particle 44. Sewing tool 45. Hello or goodbye 46. Not a single time 47. Gadabouts 48. Binge 51. Decays 52. Blowgun missile 53. Trade 54. Big party 55. Egg-shaped 56. A territorial unit of Greece 58. Do it yourself

SUDOKU The rules to play Sudoku are quite simple. Fill in the blanks so that each row, each column, and each of the nine 3x3 grids contain one instance of each of the numbers 1 through 9.

This week’s solutions:

www.MilitaryPress.com • editorsdesk@militarypress.com

Photos: linandjirsa.com

Military Wedding Package Ceremony & Reception

Pala Mesa proudly honors our men and women who serve in our Armed Forces.

The Military Wedding Package includes: • Two Course Plated Meal • Champagne Toast • Wine Service • Bridal Dressing Suite • Honeymoon Suite • Wedding Coordinator • All for $60 per person

Exquisite Waterfalls, Lavish Gardens, Guestroom Availability.

• Friday or Sunday Weddings • $1500 Venue Fee • Restrictions Apply • New Bookings Only • Must book by 06.30.15. Contact our wedding department for more details. weddings@palamesa.com

Pala Mesa Resort | Fallbrook, CA | palamesa.com | 760.477.7240 For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • advertising@militarypress.com

June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 19

artoasIs

artwork by combat troops

View artworks created by more than 75 active duty military members at this special showcase, on view at the Museum of Contemporary art San Diego through September 6th.

This year the Museum of Contemporary art San Diego launched artoaSIS, a comprehensive art-based program supporting the recovery of active military personnel from the symptoms of combat-related stress. The partnership joins MCaSD with Combat arts San Diego, a local nonprofit organization that provides art experiences for combat troops, and the interdisciplinary oaSIS program at Naval Medical Center San Diego. over 10 weeks, groups of military members engaged in weekly art classes at the base and monthly workshops at the Museum, producing original works of art as a tool for personal expression.

we salute you MCaSD offers free admIssIon for all military members—past and present— and their families. la jolla 700 Prospect St.

858 454 3541 www.mcasd.org

The artoaSIS program at MCaSD is proudly supported by the California arts Council 2014 Creative Communities Program, Mary Keough lyman, The Seeley Foundation, Cox Cares, proceeds from the 2014 Biennial art auction, and annual contributions to the MCaSD Fund.

Institutional support of MCaSD is provided by the City of San Diego Commission for arts and Culture and the County of San Diego Community Enhancement Fund.

This activity is funded by the California arts Council, a state agency, advancing California through the arts and creativity. learn more at www.arts.ca.gov.

20 June 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS

www.MilitaryPress.com • editorsdesk@militarypress.com