Misc Commencement 2019

The Miscellany News

Since 1866 | miscellanynews.org

Vassar College Poughkeepsie, NY

Volume CLI | Issue 24

May 26, 2019

Senior Vassar custom honors showcase Asian-identified grads rocks on Am Chunnananda Guest Reporter

Alex Barnard Columnist

Courtesy of Bryan Ruby Bryan Ruby’s band, Rubies in the Rough, performs at the StuMu Senior Showcase on Tuesday, May 7. The showcase provided an opportunity for seniors to perform one last time for their classmates.

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s the Class of 2019 prepares to venture off into the real world, many graduating students have vowed not to abandon the Vassar community, but to give back to it through projects, showcases and art installations. On Tuesday, May 7, the graduating members of the Student Musician’s Union (StuMu) did just that, performing at the Mug for the final time.

See STUMU on page 4

T

he Red Stole Ceremony, formerly the Lei Ceremony, is a tradition at Vassar that aims to recognize the accomplishments of Asian and Asian American graduating seniors and welcome them into the alumnae/i community. In addition to a separate cer-

emony held prior to graduation, seniors wear a red satin stole (formerly a ti leaf lei) when they walk during commencement.

As a first-year, graduation is something that has, for the majority of my time at Vassar, remained distant from my immediate view of the future. But the See RED STOLE on page 3

Dean Kopitsky Columnist

S

hortly before the end of the semester, I received a text from our soon-to-be Editor-In-Chief, Mack Liederman. His message appeared pretty mundane: His political science professor had missed class due to illness.

For the Rockefeller Hall veteran Professor of Political Science Stephen Rock, however, it was his first time doing so at Vassar. For 32 years, Rock showed up for class to teach without missing a beat. That April day, his remarkable iron man streak ended.

The otherwise unceremonious

occasion presented an opportunity to highlight one of the longest tenured faculty members at Vassar. During the first week of spring-term finals, he took time from a chaotic grading period to reflect on the dynamics of campus since he unassumingly began his See PROF ROCK on page 4

Courtesy of Samuel Stuart

Prof misses first class in 32 years

During the 2018 Red Stole Ceremony, President Bradley shakes hands with a graduate. The tradition celebrates individual achievements and welcomes soon-to-be graduates to Vassar’s alumnae/i community.

VC Filmmakers spruce Athletic year ends with accolades up org with short films Teddy Chmyz Sports Editor

Abby Tarwater Arts Editor

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Inside this issue

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Underclassman reaps unexpected benefits during HUMOR graduation season

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s seniors reflect upon and celebrate their time at Vassar, The Miscellany News Sports section would like to highlight just a few shining moments from the graduating champions of the Burgundy and Gray.

The athletic triumphs that marked the 2018-2019 Brewers campaign included women’s basketball rattling off 16 straight wins en route to the NCAA tournament,

Courtesy of Nick Jallat

n short films exploring topics ranging from lemon throwing to sculpture making to family longing, the directors of VC Filmmakers proved their dynamism and range in their student showcase on Monday, May 20.

The screening featured seven pieces by Leon Brill ’19, Kota Lee ’19, Laura Zapien ’20, Tony Hernandez ’20 and Max Kelly ’21.

Together, the motley crew of film makers view this student showcase as the culmination of their dedicated efforts throughout the 2018-19 school year to establish a passionate and cohesive film community at Vassar.

Brill and Lee looked upon the work they shared proudly, reflecting on the considerable growth they have seen in VC Filmmakers since they came to Vassar four years ago. Lee stated, “The org as it currently stands didn’t exist two years ago. We made it happen because Leon and I just really wanted an outlet to make films, and that didn’t really exist on campus that much.” Brill

concurred, “I took over the club at the end of my sophomore year.

It was basically dead.”

The two revitalized VC Filmmakers by revamping its equipment, improving outreach to students and fostering a sense of community among members.

Brill and Lee consider this showcase to be the capstone of these efforts. When asked what their proudest achievement is since they took on this project, Lee responded, “The amount of shorts we’ve done this semester—we’ve done 11.” Brill then added, “The amount of people that show up to meetings now. That wasn’t a thing. We didn’t have a central group of people.”

Brill and Lee ended their VC Filmmakers careers with zany and daring works. Brill shared his comedy-horror short “De-Stress.”

He reflected, “The rooftop shoot was probably the most fun day on set. Getting to put hamburger meat mixed in with blood on Cosmo [Sweeney ’19]’s head was a time.” Lee showed three projects: “Ghost,” “Vitamin C” and “LemSee FILM on page 3

field hockey earning its first-ever Liberty League title, women’s rugby team capturing an NCAA championship, and two men’s basketball players joining elite company as 1,000-point scorers.

Seniors involved in these legacy-leaving moments shared their thoughts, both on their successes this year and in their entire Vassar careers.

Despite these many individual and team achievements, athletes across all Vassar sports agree that

Above, the women’s basketball team huddles up to talk gameplan. No matter the play called, it worked: The Brewers enjoyed an impressive 16-game winning streak and advanced to the NCAA tournament.

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Nine seniors offer reflections upon time SENIOR RETROSPECTIVES spent as Vassar students

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being a Brewer transcends the boundaries of the court, field, pitch or track. The student-athletes interviewed for this article are all connected by the sense of community and family they found within their teams, and how that in turn catalyzed their collective accomplishments.

ssssssssssssssssssss Women’s Basketball Wins 16 Straight

ssssssssssssssssssss Over in the AFC gymnasium and globetrotting around the Liberty League, the women’s basketball team was on a streak of historic proportions. In a period just north of three months, the Brewers could not be beat. The team won 16 straight games, thanks in large part to a strong team culture that emphasized lockdown defense and commitment.

Senior guard Maddie Leong, the Liberty League Defensive Player of the Year, commented on the feeling in the locker room during the streak. “It felt like everything we’ve been working for for the past four years finally came together,” Leong explained. “During the winning streak it felt like everything we did See SPORTS on page 8

Posse veteran discusses Moral Injury and OPINIONS citizen-solider divide

The Miscellany News

Page 2

May 26, 2019

Senior imparts, channels fresh curiosity

Editor-in-Chief Mack Liederman

Senior Editors

Frankie Knuckles Jessica Moss

Contributing Editors Leah Cates Sasha Gopalakrishnan

Features Opinions Humor and Satire Arts Sports Design Copy Online Social Media Photo

All photos by Yijia Hu/The Miscellany News

Duncan Aronson Features Editor

“I

wonder how high we can pile up the sand?

“Let’s make a canal or a river!”

“Does the sand get redder than this?

What’s the reddest it can go?”

“This is so cool!”

One would expect these phrases to burst out from a bunch of kids playing in a sandbox. One would not expect said kids to be four Vassar college students in the Geology department building, none of whom were geology majors, and at least one who had never set foot in the building. Yet there we were: two seniors, a sophomore and a first-year playing with sand and colors.

Our imaginations buzzed with activity, as we were fueled by a curious, young energy.

The feeling of youthful joy becomes elusive on an increasingly familiar campus. To an impressionable first-year in their first semester, Vassar is an undiscovered, uncharted world of exciting possibilities. Yet, Vassar quickly becomes all-too comfortable. The campus space seems to shrink as one’s mental map is filled, and the range of possibilities narrows as routines calcify.

For Sam Lim ’19, a senior with nearly four years of Vassar life under his belt, “elusive” does not mean “impossible.” He took it upon himself to break away from his routine, finding new places and engaging in new events on campus. So when I asked him if he was interested in being featured in The Miscellany News, the opportunity presented another chance for fresh discovery.

Lim offered to take me around to some of the areas he frequented as a senior. Sophia Yoo ’19, a friend of Lim, volunteered to drive us around and give us access to the art studios. Yvette Hu ’22, the Misc’s Photo Editor, joined us to take photos. With our four-person motley crew, we set out from the Main building for the art studio near the Safety and Security Office, and then off to the sculpture studio near the ALANA center. Yoo had first introduced these spaces to Lim, who was now introducing

them to Hu and me.

A sheer abundance of objects and unexplained art crowded the art studios: drawers upon drawers of supplies; complex machinery with serrated edges and numerous moving parts; stacks of wood, pipe and other materials; paintings, pictures and prints of different palettes and styles sprawled all over the floors and walls.

Yet what most caught Lim’s attention was the dark room, where students develop film and photo negatives. The room had to be kept extremely dark to avoid damaging the light-sensitive cellophane. There were various light settings and colors for the room, and even a rotating half-cylinder door, to prevent light that a conventional open door would let in. More objects abounded: trays of various shapes and sizes, canisters of chemicals and their strong accompanying smell, black and white strips of still frames.

“I just think this room is so cool, and after I saw it I actually tried to get into a photography class this semester,” Lim explained. “The class was full so I couldn’t take it, but it’s still cool I got to come here and learn about this place.” When I asked how he felt about the timing of his encounters with the dark room and his interest in photography, he nonchalantly quipped, “At the end of the day, it’s better late than never.” The end result didn’t seem to matter as much as the process: the thrill of venturing off the trail and finding sweet berries of inspiration.

After visiting the art studios, we briefly stopped at the recording studio of WVKR, Vassar’s local radio station. Here, students and locals can get behind the mic and experience what it’s like to be a radio host, or to get their original music featured. From the moment we stepped foot in the studio, the stark contrast to the art studios was striking. Where the art studios were large, loud parties of colors and art, the recording studio was a relaxed library of black shelves, labeled by genre and lined with neatly arranged CDs. Lim and Yoo both hosted in their senior

years, and described some of the DJ duties, including PSAs, song requests and so forth.

Yoo participated regularly in a program established with her friends to showcase a variety of Korean songs of different times, origins and personal significance. The recording studio is another fertile soil for the fruits of inspiration.

As we took a moment to lounge in the space, I asked Lim if he had any concluding remarks for our radio studio visit. He responded by giving additional context to his senior year, namely other activities he explored, like watching comedic performances and sports matches, before delivering his reflection. “Vassar is full of all these opportunities, and really talented people doing really cool things,” he said. “I appreciate what everyone does more and feel more strongly connected to the Vassar community.”

Just as the interview was winding down, Lim remembered he had not been to the Geology department building, which boasts its own small museum. The four of us promptly made our way over. Situated in Ely Hall, a red-brick building with arched, wooden double-doors, the museum exudes earthiness and age, with beige walls and brown wooden display cases filled with fossils, rocks and yellowed documents.

We circled around the display cases before spotting, directly below a projector, a sandbox.

Rather than a traditional venue for childhood skirmishes, this sandbox turned out to be an interactive topographical map. As we experimented with the sand, we realized that the projector shone a spectrum of light across the sand, with each color representing a certain elevation. If we put our hands high enough in front of the projector, a dark blue light moved fluidly to lower points of elevation, which we speculated represented water. We were completely lost in the sandbox before anyone realized.

Ultimately, Lim not only shared but embodied the new lens he gained, seeing the world less like a familiar dirt path and more like a colorful, communal sandbox.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Duncan Aronson Jonas Trostle Hannah Gaven Abby Tarwater Teddy Chmyz Rose Parker Lilly Tipton Lucy Leonard Anastasia Koutavas Natalie Bober Yijia Hu

Assistant News Olivia Watson Aena Khan Assistant Features Gillian Redstone Assistant Humor Izzy Migani Assistant Arts Taylor Stewart Assistant Online Chris Allen Reporters Delila Ames Ariana Gravinese Jonah Frere-Holmes Tiana Headley Columnists Catherine Bither Alex Barnard Jimmy Christon Jesser Horowitz Dean Kopitsky Emmett O’Malley Sylvan Perlmutter Blair Webber Copy Adelaide Backhus Anna Blake Samantha Cavagnolo Madeline Seibel Dean Amanda Herring Phoebe Jacoby Caitlin Patterson Mina Turunc Cartoonist Frank Crossword Benjamin Costa

CORRECTION POLICY The Miscellany News will only accept corrections for any misquotes, misrepresentations or factual errors for an article within the semester it is printed.

The Miscellany News is not responsible for the views presented within its Opinions pages. The weekly staff editorial is the only article which reflects the opinion of the Editorial Board.

May 26, 2019

COMMENCEMENT

Page 3

VC Filmmakers focus on fostering student film scene FILM continued

Courtesy of Kota Lee

from page 1 ons.” On “Lemons,” Lee jokingly mused, “It shows we had a blast making that …

Throwing lemons at people is really fun, and I recommend it personally—as long as they’re cool with it.”

Although Brill and Lee are graduating, they are confident in the leadership and vision of younger VC Filmmakers members. Kelly, who will be the Equipment Manager next semester, shared how he envisions shaping the future of the org: “Personally, I will just keep on doing what Kota was doing this semester of getting as many people as possible access to the equipment, and being an open resource for people to come [to] with their ideas,” he said. “Just having people that you’re connected to that want to make film is great.”

The work that Kelly, Hernandez and Zapien shared at the showcase demonstrated their eclectic perspectives and approaches. Kelly screened his short documentary “Into the Fire,” which details the work of a sculpture student at Massachusetts College of Art and Design, while Hernandez presented his drama “Audition,” about a struggling actor. Zapien commented on their project “Sombras, Nada Más,” which they produced for their film seminar. They described it as a cathartic experience: “The video I made was about family and missing my family, and I made it because I was at a point where I was really sad and homesick. For the video, I just looked over videos of my family—instead of being sad, I tried to make something out of it.”

Above is a still from Kota Lee ’19’s short film “Blink,” starring Abigail Kipfel ’22.

The piece is one of 11 short films that the revitalized VC Filmmakers produced collaboratively during the Spring semester under the leadership of Lee and Brill ’19.

Zapien explained, however, that such classroom opportunities are largely restricted to upperclassmen; first-year and sophomore film majors rarely have the opportunity to create their own films, leaving them to rely on orgs such as VC

Filmmakers to acquire any production experience. Other VC Filmmakers articulated further reasons why their club is vital.

Brill expounded, “I think community is really necessary for any film project, because you don’t have one person making

it. A one man crew is really impossible.”

Lee corroborated the importance of having a filmmaker community: “At the end of the day, it’s cool if our shorts end up ‘good,’ but as long as we have fun making them—we’re with our friends, we’re with people we care about making all this content—it really shows.”

Lee then reflected on how the VC Filmmakers family has helped them flourish as a filmmaker, and how it will guide their creative projects after Vassar. “Our entire careers we owe to the things we’ve done together and the people we’ve worked with in our various shorts,” they said.

“These are people that we will be working with for the rest of our lives. Not only are we building relationships by hanging out and making movies with each other, but we’re also building skills for the industry we all want to go into.”

Brill and Lee have ambitious aspirations for the future of VC Filmmakers. For example, Lee shared their goal to have the org get one of the group’s pieces into Sundance Film Festival next year. However, the two ultimately revived VC Filmmakers not only to forge a space for students to produce prestigious films, but also to institute film as a thriving element of Vassar’s art community. Lee summarized their vision: “I would like for us to be an established enough institution at Vassar that eventually people can say, ‘I want to go to Vassar because of the student film scene.’ A student film scene didn’t exist... but it has the foundation to be something really incredible, and I’m super excited to see where it goes.”

Red stoles symbolize accomplishments of Asian graduates RED STOLE continued

who helped them thrive and to help give closure to their own experiences.” In 2017, however, the ti leaf lei was changed into a red satin stole, explained Assistant Director of Alumnae/i Engagement Jane Lu ’17 via a Skype call during the second PAL meeting in early May. Many Asian and Asian American students did not find the lei to be a personally meaningful object in this context, in addition to it potentially appropriating Hawaiian culture. Seeing as red is a symbolically positive color in many Asian cultures, the students at the time decided to settle on a red stole, promptly changing the object of the ceremony after making the necessary arrangements with the Office of Alumnae/i Affairs & Development (OOAD).

Cheung expressed complete understanding of this sentiment in our correspondence, acknowledging that identifying a physical object to represent a community as diverse as the Asian and Asian American community at Vassar was and is not an easy task. “The open ti-leaf lei was originally selected for its impermanence, and for its representation of saying both goodbye to the on campus Vassar community, and saying hello to the broader community of Vassar alumnae/i,” she explained. “Over time, some of the story and thought behind the meaning behind the lei was lost,” she recognized, reflecting Lu’s account of the change in 2017.

The red stole has remained the representative object for the Class of 2019’s cohort. However, Lu, who has been acting as a liaison between alumnae and students as they determine the best object for the ceremony, recognized that “red doesn’t necessarily hold the same meaning for different cultures.” She then invited input from

present PAL members as to what the object could be. Adding a flower with a symbolic meaning, or simply keeping the red stole, were both raised as suggestions, but PAL has yet to settle on a revised object.

Members continue to think deeply about how to best select one, given the vast and varied experiences that constitute the Asian and Asian American identity.

During the call, Lu expressed recognition of the broadness of “Asian” as a constituency, offering the example that even ASA, an org that welcomes all Asian-identifying students on campus, falls short in fully representing all Asian and Asian American backgrounds at Vassar.

When asked to share her thoughts on the revisting of the object of the ceremony, Cheung shared, “Given the complexity of the community, I do not think that there

will ever be a perfect object, whether a stole or flowers. [Thus,] I think that it is important to continually engage in reflection about what the ceremony is about, and what objects may be meaningful to the students who are part of the ceremony.”

Both Cheung and Lu, as Asian/Asian American alums, agree on the importance of ensuring current students are empowered to shape the ceremony to be most meaningful to them. They have taken steps to cement student participation in such decision processes. As Lu summarized, alums are “trying to figure out how best to revamp this chapter while keeping this interaction very genuine and making sure things are being done for the right reasons, with [current students’] desires at the forefront.”

Courtesy of Samuel Stuart

from page 1 gap between me and the prospect of commencement shrunk significantly when I attended the first Pan-Asian League (PAL) meeting in April. PAL, a committee of representatives from different Asian-identifying orgs on campus, was initiated by Sandra Yu ’22—current Co-First-Year Representative and next semester’s Vice President for the Asian Students’ Alliance (ASA)—after a Vassar alum contacted the current ASA Executive Board. Specifically, Delia Cheung ’00 reached out to discuss what the Red Stole Ceremony is and historically has been, and what current Asian and Asian American students can perhaps do to ensure that the ceremony will be as meaningful as possible when it comes time for them to put on their own caps and gowns.

Cheung helped organize the inaugural ceremony back in 2000. “I believed that it was important to [recognize] the specific accomplishments of Asian/Asian American graduates,” she explained in an email correspondence. Having served on ASA’s Executive Board for two years, Cheung “[saw] the ways that community was such an important part of students’ lives on campus, especially for students of color.”

As a result, she felt it important to establish the (then-called) Lei Ceremony, which was an intentionally community-centered celebration, rather than one that focused solely on individual accomplishments.

During the first Lei Ceremony, held for the graduating Class of 2001, “Asian American alumnae/i were present to bestow an open ti-leaf lei on graduating seniors,” Cheung recounted. “Seniors were [also] given time to reflect and share about their journey at Vassar, to recognize the people

Above, the Class of 2018’s red stole recipients pose following the Red Stole Ceremony.

The event is organized by Asian/Asian-American alumni, with input from students.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

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COMMENCEMENT

May 26, 2019

StuMu Senior Showcase: Musicians recall last performance STUMU continued

from their past shows: “I think my favorite memory was the first time Evan [Stark ’19] and I played a Lumber Party show junior year. It was our first time really playing that material we had, and people went wild for some of the songs.” An eclectic performer, Lee has fronted several musical endeavors during their time at Vassar, such as the alt-rock outfit Lumber Party and their current hip-hop project LAV (The Lavender Meltdown).

For her part, Lipman particularly enjoyed the cover shows. “Last year my friends and I performed as the School of Rock and this year I played as David Bowie. Both shows were some of my favorite nights at college.” She also reminisced on StuMu as a whole, commenting, “I’m deeply proud of the work we’ve done to build this org into what it is today, and the Senior Showcase felt like a capstone of that effort and proof that we’ve created something really special on campus.”

Several of the performers praised the general atmosphere and sense of camaraderie that pervades the on-campus music scene. Bryan Ruby ‘19, lead singer of Rubies in the Rough, said, “The band community here is pretty strong; we all know each other and support each other’s ventures, regardless of what genre each band plays.” Lee echoed Ruby’s statements,

Courtesy of Emma Koolpe

from page 1 The StuMu Senior Showcase was an all-star event comprised of veterans from the Vassar music scene and encompassing a range of music styles, including hard rock, country and hip-hop. The lineup included current StuMu co-heads Vanessa Achoy ‘19, Kota Lee ‘19 and Nicole Lipman ‘19, singer-songwriter Jacob Barba ‘19 and on-campus bands Bel, Rubies in the Rough and relative newcomers Python.

The Miscellany News was able to reach out to a few of the musicians that played at the Senior Showcase. Performing in showcases since her sophomore year, Isabel Furman ‘19, lead singer of Bel, spoke fondly of her time performing on campus.

Reflecting on the Senior Showcase, she stated, “This lineup felt so representative of how we’ve all grown up and found our voices with each other. I’m really grateful to have played with/for them for four years!”

Furman also commented on how her college experience changed her relationship with music: “I was afraid to join and very shy about music before, but once I became friends with [Lipman], she really encouraged me to get involved and play their shows more frequently.”

Likewise reflecting on personal growth as a musician, Lee discussed highlights

Pictured are the co-heads of StuMu: Kota Lee, Nicole Lipman and Vanessa Achoy, all Class of 2019. Although senior student-musicians’ college careers are coming to a close, some of them plan to pursue their passion for music after they receive their diplomas. praising the collaborative nature of the relationships between the bands, and stating, “I’m thankful I was able to help build a community that can come together like this.”

Lipman also spoke about the connection between the bands on campus. “I think the band community at Vassar is growing, slowly. I’m grateful that our community here is supportive and close—we have a StuMu policy that all performers stay for the whole show, and I think it’s really helped to foster community connections between bands across genre and class years.”

While the Senior Showcase might mark

some performers’ final show at Vassar, that does not mean they will stop playing or organizing shows. According to Lipman, “I’ve been performing music my whole life, but organizing shows was a new interest I found in college and is something I’m hoping to continue doing in my postgrad life.” Ruby likewise plans to continue pursuing his passion for music. When asked about his reaction to playing the Senior Showcase, Ruby commented, “[The Senior Showcase] was an emotional last show at school but I know there will be many more shows in my future.”

[The quotes in this article are sourced from text-message interviews.]

Rock reflects on transformation in politics, student body PROF ROCK continued

from page 1 remarkable streak, 32 years ago.

Streaks only occur where hard work and luck intersect. Professor Rock proved that before he began his Vassar career. To make his interview at Vassar, he drove through a New England snowstorm from Boston to Poughkeepsie. Years later, the long drive paid off: “I interviewed, was eventually offered the job, and I took it because I thought it would be a good place to be. It’s actually proven to be a fabulous place to be. I’ve really loved almost every minute of it.

The son of a history professor, Rock was raised in an academic atmosphere. But in college, his own professors demonstrated that teaching could be fruitful and fun.

Speaking about his academic inspirations, Rock recounted, “I think it was really the example of my professors who not only were wonderful teachers but looked like they were having a great time while they were doing it.”

The impetus for our talk was his iron man streak and its quiet end. Although I joked to Professor Rock that his health wouldn’t be the sole subject of the whole interview, I just had to ask what his streak meant to him.

“So do you rank yourself among Cal Ripken Jr. and Lou Gehrig?” I inquired. He laughed, “No no, I don’t think I have that type of iron man streak. Although I do feel very fortunate that I have been healthy. I’ve been sick plenty of times in the 32 years I’ve been at Vassar, but never too sick on a teaching day to teach. So when I’ve been sick its always been on holidays or weekends.” Despite his insistence that getting sick only on weekends and breaks was a stroke of luck, I can’t imagine many Vassar students—–some of whom forgo class due to so much as a sniffle—–boasting a similarly impressive attendance record.

Although Rock’s optimism and punctuality have remained consistent over the course of his sick-day-less tenure, Vassar has transformed quite a bit. “It’s hard for me to remember that far back,” he joked when

I asked if campus has changed since his arrival in 1987. From his perspective, there are two main differences: “The campus wasn’t nearly as diverse as it is today, and I would say the students weren’t nearly as good on average as they are today.”

It was surprising to hear what Professor Rock said about his classes earlier in his tenure. “The range was wider. When I first got here I had students in class that actually had trouble writing sentences. I haven’t had students like that in a long time.” It’s hard to say whether Professor Rock means the students’ grammatical skills were subpar, or if the content of their writing was inferior to his standards. Nevertheless, the range in quality of writing has shrunk: “[T]he bottom has come up, but the top has stayed about the same,” he said.

Although some students today might take for granted that Vassar is a left-leaning campus, it was relatively different in the ’80s. “There was a fairly small but still somewhat sizable group of extremely vocal conservative students who were also very smart,” said Rock, who appreciated the varying viewpoints they brought. However, that is no longer the case. In fact, the Vassar College Republicans did not even receive VSA budgeting for the upcoming fiscal year.

“We just don’t get a lot of them anymore.

I think they self-select out.” He says their viewpoint aided class discussions, as “they forced students who were liberal to articulate their own views in response.” Vassar is not the only institution grappling with the trade-off of “having that kind of diversity and protecting people from things they should be protected from.” Professor Rock remains agnostic on the issue: “In terms of ideological diversity, I think campus is less diverse, which I’m not sure is a good thing.”

Since 1987, there have been four Republican presidents and two Democrats, as well as a score of political scandals and paradigm shifts: 9/11, subsequent wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the lifting of restrictions on gay marriage, the election of the first Black president, the election of Donald

Trump...I wondered if being a political science professor informs how Professor Rock sees politics in the context of Vassar.

Professor Rock said he pays attention to the climate of ideology on campus, but he doesn’t fixate on it. Like grades and classes, things tend to operate cyclically. Contentious moments arise, and some years are better than others.

Yet, it seems like this particular political moment is especially bewilding. Professor Rock sees the Trump administration and the greater picture as “sort of the last gasp of mostly white men, not college-educated, who are afraid of losing their status and power in a society that’s becoming less white and male.”

The veteran professor tries to make sense of the dynamic nature of politics through an appreciation of the liberal arts. I asked how important that philosophy is to understanding politics. It turned out to be essential to even more, according to Rock. “I think it’s important to understanding pretty much everything, including politics,” Rock said.

“Take climate change for example. If you don’t have a background in economics and science as well as history and technology, you’re not going to be able to understand the issues.”

Professor Rock began his career in academia studying strategic diplomacy. But around 2003, at the beginning of the Iraq War, he became interested in the relationship between religion and politics, in the context of U.S. foreign policy. When I asked if he was still inspired by his earlier interests or questions, he gave a surprising answer. “The great thing about being a faculty member is that you’re a perpetual student.

You learn by doing your research, but you learn so much by teaching.”

Rock believes that students should study for knowledge, as opposed to grades. While wars and religious zealots may be scary to some Vassar students, it will ease their minds to know that Rock is the type of professor who doesn’t think grades are everything. “They were motivation for me and

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

they’re certainly motivators for some students,” Rock reflected. “It’s kind of unfortunate that they are. It would be wonderful to have an institution where learning happens for the sake of learning.”

The professor also praised pupils’ astuteness: “Students express viewpoints that you’ve never heard before. They’ll ask you questions to which you don’t know the answer. It’s an extremely intellectually stimulating life. I’ve had some moments where I walked out of class and just said, ‘wow.’”

Being at Vassar so long, Professor Rock has seen many vital luminaries of campus (like himself), and there is one professor that he remembers with particular fondness. Bill Rumble was part of the political science department for the first decade or so of Professor Rock’s tenure, but he had been teaching since the ’60s. He earned the nickname “D+ Rumble” for being an old school, chalk-breaking, ruler-toting hard grader.

Rumble used the Socratic method in class, so he often put students on the spot.

“The students loved it. They just loved it.

He was one of the nicest guys you will ever meet. Kind of the conscience of the department, and even the conscience of the college in some ways. A man of absolute personal integrity,” Rock recalled. “He had a laugh you could hear from miles away. A great faculty member, a great colleague and a wonderful friend.”

As I packed up, full of wisdom and tales of Vassar old and new, I paused to inquire about a question that has been nagging me since before I ever got to campus.

“I have to ask you: Do you ever get the, ‘Hey, Vassar, that’s a women’s school right?’”

He laughed. “I grew up in Ohio. There are still people in the Midwest who haven’t quite caught on to the fact that Vassar is coed, but it happens rarely.”

I’m sure it’s one of the easier questions that iron man Rock has fielded during his 32-year tenure, replete with transformation in politics and the student body, and learning from those that he himself inspired.

May 26, 2019

COMMENCEMENT

Page 5

Vassar vet responds to moral injury lecture Seniors allege they will stay O close friends Romario Ortiz

Guest Columnist

n April 25, 2019 Georgetown Professor of Philosophy Nancy Sherman gave a lecture titled “Moral Injury and Resilience through a Stoic Lens: Homecomings for Iraq/Afghanistan Veterans.”

In her lecture, she made the case that the moral injuries soldiers experience in war are carried back with them upon returning home, and that looking back to classical Stoic philosophy in a more critical way can serve society in helping to resolve this contemporary issue.

As a veteran of the war in Afghanistan, I was interested in attending the lecture and responding to her argument regarding moral injury and Stoic philosophy as it relates to the modern warfare soldier.

Rather than focus on the exact definitions of Stoic philosophy, I will explain how the modern soldier can relate to it so well in perspectives of war.

Before I begin, I want to make clear that I use the word “soldier” as an all-encompassing term. My use of “soldier” stems from my own service in the Army, even though I know that the term does not apply to service members in the Navy, Marines or Air Force. With that said, I come to my first point: moral injury.

This term refers to the anguish, guilt and moral tension many soldiers feel, but it is not necessarily always coupled with PTSD. Moral injury refers to the emotional shame and psychological damage incurred from experiences that soldiers have witnessed, or of which they have been a part, through no fault of their own.

As I have explained it here, it does seem to overlap with the signs and symptoms of PTSD, but the perceived differences will be covered later. Here, moral injuries are not physical wounds but psychological.

However, it is important to note that they are still wounds nonetheless.

They are not only caused by bullets or bombs. They are caused whenever a soldier’s sense of right and wrong has been violated, whenever their sense of morality is upended. They can also be caused whenever a morally wrong decision must be taken in order to protect one’s life or the life of another. Consider, for example, the decision to airstrike a military target, leading to collateral damage of civilian casualties.

“...moral injuries are not physical wounds but psychological... they are still wounds nonetheless.”

Technological innovations since 2001 have made U.S. soldiers sent to Iraq and Afghanistan the most well-equipped and skilled in history. But that technology has placed a heavy burden on soldiers to make morally questionable decisions that are legally justified in the Rules of Engagement (ROE).

The ROE are directives given out by military commanders that outline the circumstances and limitations under which forces will engage in combat with the enemy. Simply put, these are the rules for killing another human being. If the ROE has justified a possible action, a soldier has the legal right to shoot to kill.

But what if moral issues come into play?

What if the enemy combatant is a woman or child who is supplying ammunition

or arms to insurgents? Worse yet, what if that woman or child is the enemy combatant? Legally and technically under the ROE, a soldier can kill those individuals.

But upon doing so, that soldier will live with the morally ambiguous decision that they have taken. The morality is questionable, the legality justifiable. What further complicates this situation is that military officers are given authority to adjust ROE as needed and based on differing situational circumstances. The battlefield is a complex, fluid and constantly changing environment. The fight now becomes a two-front affair; one with a visible enemy, the other with an invisible moral wound.

In general, it is easy to think of soldiers as Stoics, or individuals who can experience extreme adversity without expressing emotion. In our modern vernacular, the term has come to mean controlled, disciplined and not easily agitated or disturbed. In many ways, basic combat training is a soldier’s introduction to Stoicism.

Military leaders and non-commissioned officers cultivate these traits, and soldiers abide by them in their daily lives.

It is also because Stoicism tries to teach self-sufficiency, and the importance of detaching oneself from dependence on the worldly goods that make us vulnerable, that the modern soldier adheres to Stoic tenets so easily. Stoicism, to the modern soldier, is attractive because it also advocates for the detachment of emotions that marks our investment in morally fraught situations that are beyond our control.

Stoicism prepares a soldier for war and the situations in which they must make difficult decisions without emotional attachment.

This can be a high a price to pay. There are missions that come first and siblings in arms that depend on the soldier to perform their duty above all. The capacity to grieve, to mourn someone’s dead companion, or the ability to comes to terms with actions taken, is crucial to a soldier’s survival. But in war, contemporary soldiers do not have time to grieve. Yet deferring this grief has devastating psychological consequences later on for the soldier.

In my view, a soldier’s enemy’s actions are rarely as harmful as the moral injury soldiers incur and the effects of symptoms of PTSD. Normally, the two terms are seen as having differences. Moral injuries are less likely to be caused by physical injury, and PTSD injuries are more likely to come from physical injury.

However, these two terms overlap: The soldiers experiencing PTSD, and the ones facing the consequences of moral injury, endure similar moral crises: questioning actions taken, dealing with survivor’s guilt, doubting the moral validity of or justifications for their involvement, and feelings of isolation and despair. Furthermore, they face mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety. In its extreme forms, moral injury or PTSD can alter a soldier’s very character. This change in character can occur in part because, upon return, most veterans experience a disconnect with the society that deemed it necessary for them to go to war in the first place. In fact, only a very small percentage of the population today serves in the armed forces when compared to the proportion that served in Vietnam and WWII (Pew Research Center, “A Profile of the Modern Military” 10.05.2011).

The citizen-soldier divide must be fixed, so that society can share the burden of moral injury with today’s service members. The gap between citizen and soldier

is growing even wider than just the numbers. Whereas in WWII the entire nation’s focus was on purchasing war bonds and defeating the Nazis, today’s populace is forgetful and virtually unaffected by wars abroad. Because the populace is more concerned about their day-to-day lives, the soldier’s work and experiences render them an outcast, feeling as though nothing they did mattered for the country they served.

The romanticized ideal of soldiers fighting “the good fight” against a morally evil enemy persists, furthering the disconnect. Everyone is more intrigued by heroic narratives we assume to be truth than by the ugly reality of what combat really is. They cannot relate to their peers, friends or even family for fears of being viewed as some type of monster, or being lauded as some kind of hero when they feel the things they did were morally ambiguous or wrong. No citizen wants to have the conversation with the soldier for fear of being disrespectful to their service, because they opposed the war, or because they feel like they won’t be able to relate because they themselves did not serve.

“The citizen-soldier divide must be fixed, so that society can share the burden of moral injury with today’s service members.”

As a society that has remained complacent in creating moral injuries, we are responsible for providing aid to the soldiers who carry moral burdens when they return home. In our democracy, we vote to put people in charge of our governing bodies that send our troops overseas.

Even if you don’t vote, elected officials will continue to send people to war, and these individuals will continue coming home with moral injuries weighing on them, preventing their reintegration into society.

As Dr. Jonathan Schay, the clinical psychologist who coined the term moral injury, says, in order to find healing, the soldier and society must come together. He states that we must come alongside the soldier and confess: “What you did was done in our name, at our request. We cannot bear your physical wounds, or psychological scars, but we can bear the moral responsibility with you. Your transgressions in war, they are our transgressions, too. We confess this together, and seek forgiveness together” (Medium, “The Conversation About War and Our Veterans We Refuse to Have,” 05.26.2016).

Recovery for modern soldiers can only happen in community. According to combat-wounded veteran Benjamin Sledge, “Whether you are opposed to or agree with war, what we must remember is that these are our fellow brothers and sisters, sons and daughters, flesh and blood, who are desperate to reconnect with a world they feel no longer understands them. We must try and find common ground together. We’re not asking you to agree with our actions, but help us bear the burden of carrying them on behalf of the country you live in” (Medium, “The Conversation About War and Our Veterans We Refuse to Have,” 05.26.2016).

No one in their right mind wants war— we want peace, and no one exemplifies this desire more than the soldier.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Blair Webber

Will Delete Your Post-Grad Texts

W

ell, here we are. Commencement. Four years (based on cultural assumptions; much respect for anyone graduating in more years or fewer) and a minimum of 34 credits later, the class of 2019 can march across the graduation stage to receive a piece of paper worth $240,000 and the last of everyone’s self esteem. Graduation is a moment to celebrate, to share with family and friends, and to say goodbye to those you’ve grown to know or at least see a few times a day at the Deece.

Kayla Thurston ’19, graduating with a major in, found herself reflecting on what truly matters during this hectic celebration.

“I’ve been at Vassar for four years. In the long run, that’s not a lot of time, but I have changed so much since I was a first-year,” Thurston paused to wipe tears from her eyes. “But on ‘The Day’ itself, what I’ll really be focusing on is taking as many selfies with as many different people as I can. Making it into as many Snapchat stories as physically possible is the perfect way to honor the blood, sweat and tears I have put into my college education.”

Emmett Hill ’20 shared his deep sadness at seeing the Class of 2019 go: “I finally got the Terrace Apartment I’ve had my eye on, so I’m pretty stoked for next school year. But yeah, it’s gonna be super different without these guys. I will miss them a lot. I probably won’t reach out to many of them, and if they come back to visit and I see them in the Deece I’ll definitely avoid eye contact, but the campus really will never be the same without them.”

Thurston shared her thoughts about moving on from Vassar: “Life isn’t like college, but if I figured things out here I can probably figure them out in the real world, too. I’ll be back with my parents for a few months, maybe a year, and then I’ll move on. But today I’m going to make sure everyone I’ve ever made eye contact with here at Vassar knows how much I love them and value them. Even though I’ll just delete any messages they send me once this is all over without reading any of them.”

Hill commented enthusiastically on the monetary upside to the end of the Class of 2019’s Vassar career: “There’s been a ton of stuff for super cheap on Free and For Sale— I’ve been cleaning up! This week I bought a rug, five new shirts, a tea kettle, some skin products this chick used only once and two fish tanks. It cost 50 bucks total. It was a steal.”

Thurston discussed her feelings about being part of a tightly knit, international alumni network: “If I get one more email from the CDO inviting me to join Handshake, I will destroy all my electronics and go off the grid. I didn’t want them bothering me about Handshake while I was here. I sure as heck do not want them emailing me about it now that I’m gone.”

During the commencement ceremony itself, Thurston was seen diving behind anyone holding a phone at near-photo height, and adding her entire first-year writing seminar class on Snapchat with fervent promises to keep in touch “forever.” After the ceremony, Hill was found buying a pair of dress shoes off of a freshly graduated compsci major who loudly proclaimed the salary from his new job could get him “a thousand pairs of shoes.”

On behalf of the Misc, I would like to congratulate everyone walking across the stage at graduation. We feel proud of this graduating class and promise to support every single one of them, even beyond Vassar, by keeping in close, devoted contact with them. Or at least the CDO will until you join Handshake.

PUZZLES

Page 6

“Hot and Cold”

May 26, 2019

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MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

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May 26, 2019

COMMENCEMENT

Campus Canvas A weekly space highlighting the creative pursuits of student-artists

submit to misc@vassar.edu

Page 7

Excuse me, What are you looking forward to in your post-grad life?

“The different growth opportunities at my job this summer, and starting my Master’s in business administration.”

— Steve Palecki ’19

“Living in a city and figuring out what my plans are for the next five years.”

—Kai Matheson ’19

“No more homework.”

— Rebecca Andrews ’19

“Actually living in Poughkeepsie, outside the bubble.”

— Jules Eddy ’19

“Five-year reunion.”

— Ethan Fox ’19

On Saturday, May 18, 11 studio art students from the Class of 2019 presented

“Motherhood.”

—Yael Haskal ’19

their senior art show, titled “What the Hack.” The featured artists were Anthony Bartolotta, Luka Carlsen, Rose Clarfeld, Annie Duncan, Curtis Eckley, Jonah Parker, Isa Pengskul, Helen Shu, Sophia Yoo, Jojo Zhang and Anja Zhou. Above are photos from the show’s opening reception.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Mack Liederman, Editor-in-Chief Frankie Knuckles, Senior Editor

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COMMENCEMENT

May 26, 2019

Top four moments: Individuals, teams prove triumphant SPORTS continued

from page 1 worked and no one could beat us.”

Although their streak eventually came to an end, it was not the final triumph to cap off a remarkable season for the team. The Brewers also earned an at-large bid to the NCAA tournament for the first time since 2014. Although they would fall in a close fight against SUNY Geneseo in the first round of the tournament, the selection itself was a testament to the Brewers’ incredible performance throughout the run.

Leong said that success of the season could be attributed not just to their talent and hard work, but also to their camaraderie: “This year’s team was really special,” she explained. “Everyone was incredibly dedicated on the court, and we were all friends off the court too, which I think is rare.”

ssssssssssssssssssss Field Hockey Claims First Liberty League Title

ssssssssssssssssssss Vassar’s field hockey team also relied on defense to great success this year. Behind a league-first defense that allowed only eight goals across 20 league games, they took home their first ever Liberty League title, ultimately stifling the Rochester Yellow Jackets in a nail-biting 1-0 game in the final match of the league tournament.

Senior Monica Feely, who won the Most Outstanding Player award for the tourna-

ment, reflected on the significance of the win for a team that had lost in the first round of the last three tournaments. “It was an incredible feeling to win the Liberty League Championship,” she explained. “It made it even more special that this occurred while I was a senior because it was a culmination of the hard work that my class put into the program for four years. I cannot think of a better way to end my career as a field hockey player.”

Feely also emphasized how the team’s character and hard work helped them throughout the season. As the team achieved greater success and national recognition— ranked as high as fifth in all of D3—they stayed humble and kept striving to improve on every aspect of their game. Even as her team achieved unprecedented success, Feely, like the rest of senior Brewers, said she will take memories of the people, not the plays, into her years beyond Vassar. “As cliche as it is, I will remember all of the memories made with my teammates,” Feely reminisced. “Most of my fondest memories at Vassar stem from the field hockey team, It was the people I met and developed strong relationships with on and off the field, that I will remember the most.”

ssssssssssssssssssss Rugby Wins NCAA Championship

ssssssssssssssssssss For women’s rugby, this year’s NCAA Di-

vision II championship was a storybook ending and a fitting reward for four years of hard work and dedication. Having finished fourth in the country as first-years, third as sophomores and second as juniors, it seemed only fitting for this year’s class to go out on top of the DII women’s rugby world. They defeated last year’s champion, Winona State, soundly, with a final score of 50-13.

This season’s top scorer and team captain, senior Oshana Reich, described that although this was a momentous occasion, it also felt like just another victory for the consistently dominant Brewers. “There was very much that sense of accomplishing something that we’d been working towards, striving for for so long, but on the other hand it felt so normal because like it’s just what we do,” Reich explained. “It was this strange combination of being, like, so surreal and all this work [we had put] into it but then also being so normal and just like being on the field with my teammates and playing the game we love.”

Reich went on to detail that the team’s commitment and ability to learn from past experiences, along with their incredible on and off-field chemistry, was vital on the road to the championship. She described the team as a singular unit, supporting each other and building friendships that last even beyond a player’s time at Vassar. “I’ll always be part of the rugby family and that’s something I’m grateful for,” Reich affirmed.

All photos courtesy of Nick Jallat

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

ssssssssssssssssssss Grinde and Seff Break 1,000 Points ssssssssssssssssssss While women’s rugby secured the ultimate team accolades, individual achievements shone in men’s basketball. This year marked a rarity for the program, as two players broke the 1,000-point mark for their careers. Seniors Alex Seff and Paul Grinde became the 16th and 17th Vassar players, respectively, to join the elite club. Seff commented on the magnitude of this achievement, reflecting, “Becoming a 1,000-point scorer for Vassar was a very surreal experience. Coming into school, it was never something that even crossed my mind and it’s an honor now to have my name next to all of the great players who achieved 1,000 points.”

The achievement, impressive regardless of circumstances, was especially so for Grinde, who missed his entire sophomore season due to an ACL injury. Next year, Grinde will play out his final year of eligibility for the Clemson Tigers, a D1 program.

Despite his and Seff’s impressive individual achievements, Grinde stressed that the team aspect of Vassar basketball was what made his time special. When asked what he would remember most, he explained: “[I]n all honesty it was the guys on the team that made it worthwhile. We have been through so much together and I’m walking away knowing I’ve made some friends for life that have been through it all with me.”

May 26, 2019

SENIOR ADS

Page 9

Congratulations Vassar MBB Class of 2019!

Remember to be thankful.

And, don’t forget to love.

Congratulations VCSD Swammers 2019!

Meg, Margaret, Hayley and Kael

“Instructions for living a life.

Pay attention.

Be astonished.

Tell about it.” ― Mary Oliver MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

SENIOR ADS

Page 10

From pool to pitch, you’re our MVP! We are very proud of your legacy, Kate.

Love, Mom ’81, Dad, Maggie, and all of us Swordens.

May 26, 2019

Nice job, Audrey! Seems like only a short time ago you were graduating from kindergarten.

Know that you’ll always have our love and support going forward as you take on life’s new challenges. Congratulations, and stay curious!

Love Always, Mom, Dad & Meaghan

Dearest Jon, Congratulations!

We love you with all our hearts and you are our greatest joy.

Dream big, be humble, and know we always have your back.

Love forever, Mom and Dad MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

May 26, 2019

SENIOR ADS

Page 11

CONGRATS DANIELLE WISEMAN ’19!

Congratulations Desmond !

Keep doing the things you love.

To the Seniors in TH78,

You have accomplished so much, celebrated fun times, seen

one another through difficult times, watched each other push limits, achieve goals, and grow into strong individuals.

As college is coming to an end, you will now go your own

ways but will always be just a phone call away. Please never settle for less than you deserve. We are over the moon proud of you Sabrina, Tori, Tyler, and Noah!

With love,

Ronnie and Katie Pickett MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

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SENIOR ADS

May 26, 2019

Miranda Cornell Class of 2019 “Don’t just get involved. Fight for your seat at the table. Better yet, fight for a seat at the head of the table.” ­— President Barack Obama We love that you see that the fight is also for those who serve the table.

Love, Mom and Dad

“Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.” ­—Johann Goethe Aaron, we love you so much and are so very proud of you!

Mom, Dad, Danielle, Nona, Grandpa and family

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

May 26, 2019

SENIOR RETROSPECTIVES

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Talya Phelps Talya Phelps is a film major with a correlate in educational studies. In her four years at The Miscellany News, she has served as Editor-in-Chief, Contributing Editor, Senior Editor and Design Editor, among other positions. ometimes, when I strip away all of the tangible evidence of the last four years, it feels like there’s nothing left.

I’m addicted to cataloguing and quantifying my existence, and I was born into a digital landscape that indulges my impulses at every turn. There’s Goodreads to tout my elite literary tastes, Pinterest to show off my unique aesthetic, LinkedIn to scream my CV from the rooftops, Instagram to convince my friends that each moment of my life is as well-lit and hi-def as my latest post. The Notes app on my phone is filled with lists: “Good music videos,” “Favorite outfits,” “Favorite lyrics,” vocabulary words I want to use more often, links to every one of my articles (Misc and otherwise), descriptions of my strangest dreams, a chronological account of my best inside jokes with my boyfriend, collections of the funniest quotes from my friends. I take an intense yet perverse kind of pleasure in updating each one, the same kind of pleasure engendered by revising my resume or checking my credit score. Sometimes it feels like, if I don’t concretely anchor and file away each one of my life experiences, everything that makes me me will slip away.

For me, college has been a never-ending battle against my to-do list. Each week, each day, each hour, was dictated not by the rhythms of the moon and sun but by an infinite series of checkable boxes: four Misc articles edited, three class readings completed, two loads of laundry washed, one research paper researched. When I felt over-

S

whelmed by my responsibilities, I would relax by organizing the next four weeks’ deadlines in an Excel document—a brief respite before I continued my day, crossing off list items like a video game character collecting power-ups. Home on breaks, I would often feel aimless and agitated by the lack of achievable goals to spar with. Unable to drink in the delicious languor of unscheduled time without becoming overwhelmed by guilt, I would turn everything into a checkable box. Rather than taking my time to enjoy a junk-food novel, I would force myself to suffer through sophisticated classical literature, snoozing off at every chapter and finally reveling in the accomplishment when I turned the last page. At times, I reduced even my social life to a quantifiable entity: Hang-out hours were strictly limited, enough to show friends how much I cared about them but not so much that my to-do list would take a hit.

cortex. Already, my first months at Vassar blur together, turning soft and translucent, punctuated by particularly traumatic or joyful moments—and even those inevitably grow blunted by time. In 10 years, or even in five, my avalanche of photos will be the only corporeal nexus between the real and the imagined. If there are no pics, did it even happen?

In my last post for the Misc’s studyabroad blog, Far and Away, I wrote that my time in Prague had been marked by a sense of urgency: a constant awareness of the clock running out and my looming departure from Europe, after which it could be months or years before I would return. It’s true that, in my four years at Vassar, I haven’t done nearly as much as I could have. I missed out on dozens of performances and lectures, I neglected to take Art 105-106, I failed to test all of the study nooks in the library. Already, I’m on a mission to make the most of my post-grad existence: My Notes app is brimming with bars to try in Man“In 10 years, or even hattan, meals to cook in my new apartment, attractions to see when I’m studying in the in five, my avalanche U.K. for the month of September. But these, of photos will be the too, are trappings of the attitude I have to only corporeal nexus unlearn, the paradigm from which I have to break free if I want to find genuine, lasting between the real and the happiness not tethered to my latest achieveimagined.” ment.

Yet within the tableau of scores and grades At parties and events, my friends and I and image maintenance that is my life at are always the ones rampaging around with Vassar, there have been moments of intrinour phones out, Portrait Mode engaged and sic motivation and unbridled joy—ones that ready for photo ops. Especially since the resist being neatly catalogued. Even after advent of the iPhone X, I feel constant in- I knew my senior thesis was acceptable to ternal pressure to document each weekend, turn in, I happily continued fine-tuning it, capturing each major life event and com- resizing diagrams and massaging sentences mitting it to a digital memory bank far more until each was a thing of beauty and utility. trustworthy than my own fallible cerebral Under the guidance of my wonderful thesis

advisor, I created, perhaps for the first time, a product of which I was truly, unequivocally proud. Discussing social-justice issues with friends and family, I feel not the twisted pressure to use “wokeness” to gain social capital, which so long typified my engagement with power and privilege, but rather a genuine interest in working toward a better world—albeit in small ways, and with the awareness that my own education is an ongoing process.

“I created, perhaps for the first time, a product of which I was truly, unequivocally proud.”

As I exist in the liminal space between the end of finals and graduation, adjusting to the reality of oncoming massive change, tempering my wistfulness with overwhelming excitement, I am making space to reflect and to savor. I am thanking my communities at home, at school and beyond who love me unconditionally and keep me warm. I am reflecting on the incredible opportunities— studying overseas, running a collegiate publication, learning more than I thought my brain could hold, meeting an insanely talented and inspiring cohort of peers and professors—afforded to me by every single person who helps make Vassar tick. To put it simply, I am feeling incredibly lucky.

And as I take my first wobbling, uncertain baby steps into real adulthood, my goal is to modulate my overdeveloped preparedness instinct with a healthy dose of spontaneity, gratitude and joy.

I’d better write that down in my Notes app so I can check it off later.

Noah Purdy Noah Purdy is an art history major with correlates in Greek and Roman Studies and French and Francophone Studies. During his four years at The Miscellany News, he has served as Arts Editor, Senior Editor and Contributing Editor. He also served as the ART 105/106 intern his senior year He is the recipient of the Reno Prize in Greek and the Frances Daly Fergusson Prize in art history. aving earned the nickname “wordy Purdy” at The Miscellany News, either for my verbose sentences or love of copy editing, I sit rather ashamedly at a loss for words. How can I sum up four formative years at Vassar in just a few columns?

So much of my college experience has been spent grappling with words, though, that I cannot be shocked that they are failing me now.

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“Languages allow me to adopt voices that I didn’t know I had, and to find my own voice within them.”

For one, I’m honored to have my words printed for a last time in the Misc, a publication I’ve worked for in many capacities during all four years of college. I took a chance my first year and joined Vassar’s storied newspaper, looking perhaps to find my voice among many. I think that voice still has a ways to go, but I can say without hesitation that I found a wonderfully opinionated bunch to learn from and

with, a team to work long hours and late nights alongside and, importantly, a group of friends. The pride we all took in seeing our words and images, our puns and captions and our collaborations and energies emerge week after week in print made the struggles worth it and bonded us in ways I’ll always hold dear.

Words also cropped up in the many languages I took while at Vassar. I’ve loved every moment of struggling through an Ancient Greek lexicon to finally have an ancient story come alive, of trying out French slang while abroad, of reading a new alphabet in Arabic classes and of picking up scattered words from friends in Hindi, Spanish, Russian, Croatian, Catalan, German and more. Languages allow me to adopt voices that I didn’t know I had, and to find my own voice within them. Words that feel foreign, that don’t belong to me, can become familiar, and I’m grateful to those that shared theirs with me.

My art history major has also, somewhat paradoxically, deepened my relationship to language. I would often jot down in the margins of my notes catchy turns of phrase or striking descriptions from lectures, as if grasping onto the articulations would freeze that moment of clarity or of beauty in time. Art history can feel like a grand exercise in the failure of words, since no matter how eloquent a reading, a history or a description is, there’s nothing like the silent wonder of an artwork speaking to you in its own forms.

What I may miss most of all, though, in terms of language, are the more incidental cases: the hours-long conversations with

fellow-group members who turned into buddies and then into four-year housemates and close friends; the wisecracks, endless puns and inside jokes shared with friends, acquaintances and classmates; the daily inspiration from professors with a passion for sharing knowledge.

“My fellow classmates have their own millions of stories, many of which intersect, and I think we’re the richer for it.”

I could attempt a reflection on four years at Vassar in a million different ways. Each version of my experience would capture just one side of this messy, bittersweet, joyful, frustrating and fun period of growth, failing well in its own way. My fellow classmates have their own millions of stories, many of which intersect, and I think we’re the richer for it. Our words and those we’ve absorbed make memories, and I hope we cling to them going forward.

Where words don’t fail me, however, is in the expressions of gratitude I have to give. To Tyler, Sabrina and Tori, Vassar wouldn’t have been what it was if not for you three, and neither would I. To Christine and Lydia, we met in the city of lights and you’ve brought me brightness ever since.

To Evelyn and Elena, for warming my heart.

To Charlotte, Talya and Laila, for your admirable dedication, creativity and intel-

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

ligence, but most of all your friendship.

To the entire Art History Department, and in particular my advisors Yvonne Elet and Brian Lukacher, thanks for the wisdom, patience and the infinite ways of seeing—I’m immensely lucky to have benefited from your guidance and inspiration, and I carry it forward.

To the Greek and Roman Studies Department, especially Rachel Friedman, I’ll be forever glad I took the leap; thanks for the aporia and the poroi alike.

To the French and Francophone Studies Department, VWPP and Jeong Hee and Peter, merci mille fois.

To my Uncle Matthew and Aunt Dale, for the cheering-on and the many Thanksgivings, the latter of which I owe you in heaps.

To my family, near and far, for the endless support. To my mom, dad and brother, for a lifetime of laughs and love, which are one and the same.

And to everyone I didn’t name or neglected to mention, my apologies—I’ll fail better next time. Thanks all for being part of my story and for letting me be part of yours, to whatever extent.

I guess I still have to work on finding my voice because I want to end with words written by my late grandfather, who composed poetry in his basement since way before I was born and published his first book of poems in his 90s. Vassar, like life thus far, has been as long and tumultuous as it has been short and joyful, and the kindnesses—in words and in actions, both great and small—will forever stick with me: “Gently know others, for others are you.”

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SENIOR RETROSPECTIVES

May 26, 2019

Steven Park Steven Park is a cognitive science major with a correlate in both biology and computer science. During his four years at The Miscellany News, he has served as the science columnist for the Opinions section before rising to the position of Opinions Editor and Webmaster. s my final semester draws to a close with graduation season just around the corner, I can’t help but be reminded of that one article I wrote for The Miscellany News at the end of my second year at Vassar. Back then, I was a member of the newspaper staff as a science columnist for the Opinions section, writing about the latest exciting research that had caught my attention and using various sources to break down common misconceptions that society loves to perpetuate. The article that I wrote in early May was titled “Moving beyond the science/humanities dichotomy,” and it was essentially an opportunity for me to rip apart the popular notion that studying STEM is a surefire path to success that the humanities can’t hope to provide.

As evidence, I pointed to studies conducted by the National Bureau of Economic Research, the RAND Corporation and the Urban Institute that failed to substantiate the incredible claim that STEM fields have this terrible labor market shortage with countless job openings just lying around for anyone to pick up. I’m sorry, overbearing tiger parents and indecisive trend followers who bandwagon onto a STEM major solely for its name value— scientists and engineers aren’t immune to high unemployment rates, either.

A

But the point of the article wasn’t to badmouth STEM (I mean, I’m still a science major, after all) or suggest that the humanities will solve all of your problems (they won’t). Rather, the message that I wanted to direct to all the students reading was that they should find ways to combine elements from both the humanities and STEM to introduce a new perspective to a pre-existing discipline. By mixing and matching aspects from both sides, an endless landscape of career possibilities is born. That’s why I love Cognitive Science so much and why it ended up practically defining my four years at Vassar College. After taking an introductory class with Professor of Cognitive Science Kenneth Livingston and then the absurdly work-heavy “COGS 211: Perception and Action” course taught

by Professor of Biology and Cognitive Science John Long, I was so completely enamored with its ingenious vision of integrated learning that pushed against the traditional segregation of subjects and instead embraced the interspersing of countless different areas of study. What other department at Vassar would let me combine my love for animal research, robotics and long-form essays?

At this point, enrolling at Vassar and majoring in Cognitive Science of all things almost seem like fate, even though I don’t believe in such things. In truth, integrated learning was what sparked my interest in school in the first place. While attending Radnor Middle School, I was the type of person to draw in notebooks instead of paying attention, and would fall asleep in class on a regular basis. Needless to say,

I felt aimless and didn’t see the appeal of shuffling from Math to Social Studies to French to learn what I thought were things that would never be relevant outside of school.

What woke me out of that mindset was Soundings, the eighth grade Integrated Learning Program. Created in 1998 by former Radnor teacher Mark Springer, it was a radically alternative curriculum with no letter grades, which shaped its lesson plans based on what the students wanted to learn. For the first time, math, science, English and history were each used as a tool to tackle a topic of our choice in different and creative ways. Once given the freedom to pursue what I wanted to learn, I ended up writing a 20-page final research paper on the connection between mental disorders and creative genius that drew from more than 20 sources, including an in-person interview with the school’s psychologist. So naturally, when I stumbled upon Cognitive Science for the first time during Orientation week at Vassar, I felt a peculiar sense of déjà vu. That spine-chilling feeling didn’t return again until this year, while I was looking over my completed 74-page senior thesis on morphological computation and snake locomotion.

The parallels don’t stop there, either.

Besides Cognitive Science, the one other defining element that has shaped my time here at Vassar over the past four years is, of course, The Miscellany News. For some reason, student newspapers never fail to ensnare me in their grasp. I started my first year as a member of the copy staff, wrote articles so frequently that my name (and

Charlotte Varcoe-Wolfson W

hen I was growing up, my family had a book that listed many miscellaneous things, and then stated, “But the important thing about worms is that they wiggle.” As I think back on the communities, places and activities that have shaped my time at Vassar, the following important things stand out.

The important thing about Lathrop is that it was my first home away from home.

It has cozy wood floors and not-too-small doubles. It’s only a two-minute walk from the Deece. The 3-south fellow group was enthusiastic and always entertaining.

But the important thing about Lathrop is that it was my first home away from home.

The important thing about the Vassar Unitarian Universalists is that I found community. We sing “Come, Come, Whoever You Are” and “Spirit of Life.” Check-in lasts for half of the meeting. We revel in nature walks, RSL Coffee Houses and pre-meeting Deece dinners.

But the important thing about the Vassar Unitarian Universalists is that I found community.

The important thing about Fly by Night is “mayonnaise, meat, cheese and lettuce.”

Everyone involved was a family for that spring. We trusted stars and cried every time we rehearsed the end of the show.

But the important thing about Fly by Night is “mayonnaise, meat, cheese and lettuce.”

The important thing about going abroad is that it changes you. Arriving in a new country and a new city is scary, even when you think you know the language. It forces you to make new friends and challenge previously held beliefs.

But the important thing about going abroad is that it changes you.

The important thing about writing a thesis is that it helped me reflect on my schooling. It is fascinating to do research and read Mills, Baltzell and Domhoff. It is painful to write 25,338 words, one by one.

Writing in community makes the process a little easier.

But the important thing about writing a thesis is that it helped me reflect on my schooling.

The important thing about TA 54 is that it is my home. Friends run in and out shouting, “Hello?!” Hint of lime chips are hidden in the cabinet for a special occasion. The walls are littered with remnants from a string of themed parties. The home gym functions as a movie theater and yoga studio.

But the important thing about TA 54 is that it is my home.

The important thing about The Miscellany News is that it is Vassar College’s student newspaper of record since 1866.

The office is hidden on the third floor of the College Center with one red wall, old couches and precious InDesign software.

The staff is incredibly hard-working, intelligent and creative, and comprises some of the most dedicated students on campus.

But the important thing about The Miscellany News is that it is Vassar College’s student newspaper of record since 1866.

The important thing about Vassar is the people I met here. Professors, administrators, colleagues, classmates and friends have shaped my past four years. It is to them that I owe thanks for the difficult but always inspiring and enjoyable experiences at Vassar. Vassar is a beautiful campus. It is a stimulating place to learn.

But the important thing about Vassar is the people I met here.

one other person’s) was set as the default text for the author bylines in Adobe InCopy, officially joined the staff as a columnist by my second year and finally rose to the position of Opinions Editor by the end of my third year.

What I find amusing about this progression is that I originally never planned on investing this much time into my college newspaper, much less becoming a section editor. And yet, my experience with The Miscellany News became remarkably similar to my experience with my high school student newspaper, The Radnorite—right down to becoming the editor of the Opinions section. All of it by accident, honestly.

How truly bizarre.

Looking back on my four years at Vassar, I’m surprised to say that I have no regrets.

Absolutely none. My time at Vassar was an absolute joy, and even with the late-night homework grind and my unhealthy sleep deprivation, I wouldn’t change anything if I had the chance to redo this experience.

That’s certainly something I didn’t expect from a liberal arts college I knew nothing about when I sent in my Common Application and supplemental essays.

In the senior reflection I wrote for my high school newspaper, I concluded my piece with the following statement: “[M] ost importantly, remember that where you go for college doesn’t matter; it’s what you do there that really counts.” While I won’t take back those words, I will confess that the college you attend will greatly shape you as a person. To all my friends, peers, faculty and others, thank you for granting me these wonderful past four years.

Jimmy Christon O

ne time, in a film class that I took my first year, we were doing small group discussions and I got in a disagreement with someone. At one point in the discussion, someone told me that they genuinely thought that my opinion was “wrong.” I wish that I had told them that that’s not how opinions work, but I didn’t.

One time, at the end of one of my seminars sophomore year, one of my classmates mistook me for a senior. After our last class we talked for a bit and when we separated they yelled something to me even though they were a good 15 feet away.

I turned to catch the words: “Have a good rest of your life,” they said.

One time, in another class, I said that I thought one of the texts we were reading for class was just one big straw man argument. Another kid told me something along the lines of, “You’re not making sense; that’s just how arguments work.”

One time, at my TH, my housemates and I were talking about Harry Potter fanfiction. We were talking about what characters we thought would make great pairings. Of course there was the obvious: Harry and Luna, Hermione and Draco, Harry and Neville. But at one point the conversation lulled, and one of my friends looked up with a smile and said, “Dobby and Lucius Malfoy.” The rest of that day was spent remembering that moment.

One time, I was so stressed during sophomore year that I attempted to convince myself that it was morning again so that I could force myself to feel refreshed so that I could go do more work. I did everything: I lowered my shades, dimmed the lights, made coffee, put on morning music.

It didn’t work and I had a panic attack instead.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

One time, I was in the bathroom fixing one of my contacts. It was one of the few gendered bathrooms on campus and I could see that no one was in the bathroom with me. I was very surprised, then, when I started to hear someone singing in a voice that reverberated through the entire space. I was convinced it was a ghost.

I would find out later that the bathroom next door was connected to this one by an opening in the ceiling.

One time, I was walking with some friends to the Mug my first-year (as one does). Walking there, the people in front of us were having trouble with a drunk friend. He started to stagger, tumble, and fall. I was close enough to catch him. The drunk man turned his head to look directly into my eyes and he said, “Let me go or I’m going to fucking beat you.” Then his friend took us apart.

One time, in the bathroom during my first-year Halloween, someone came up to me and said: “My friend wants to know, are you circumcised?” I obviously ignored him, continued my night, went to a party and ate some pizza. That same night, someone came up to me and said, “Your costume makes you look kinda like a pedophile.” I think it was due to the large marker-mustache I had put on. I was dressed as Theodore Twombly from Spike Jonze’s “Her.” One last time, on that same night, I was washing the mustache off of my face in the bathroom. I was also eating pizza at the same time. Pizza in my left hand, wet paper towel in my right hand. A boy walked in, looked at me and said, “This is probably the most Vassar thing I’ve seen in a while.” Then he looked at me more closely and asked: “Were you the guy from ‘Her?’”

May 26, 2019

SENIOR RETROSPECTIVES

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can’t remember how many times freshman year I wanted to transfer. It had a been a difficult, two-semester transition: Vassar wasn’t my first choice school, and I was still struggling to find my purpose here. Rampant anti-Semitism on campus and a frustratingly stodgy political climate left me nostalgic for simpler days. Even though I had friends, and for the most part enjoyed my classes, I felt isolated.

I spent hours deliberating over this piece—what message I wanted to send, how I would write it, and why it was important. I decided to ditch every idea I had. All I want to say is thank you. Thank you to The Miscellany News, who gave me purpose. Thank you to Chabad, who gave me a community.

Thank you to the Access and Mock Trial Exec Boards, who have given me a place on campus. Thank you to my entire campus family, who have paid me a service so great that I doubt I could repay it in a thousand lifetimes.

To The Miscellany News I wasn’t even at Vassar College for a month before I wrote my first article for The Miscellany News. The Opinions Editor at the time had heard that I had been regularly going to VSA meetings, and that I was vocal about my (oftentimes unpopular) opinions. And so, based on that information, she reached out to me about writing an article for The Misc, which I gladly accepted. My first ever article was about the meal plans at Vassar; It wasn’t very good, and, for my sake, I would ask you not to look it up.

I have written on a variety of topics for the Misc over the years: anti-Semitism, Zionism, disability rights, the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, gun control, political correctness, Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump. Some of these articles I stand behind fully, some I still agree with in part and some I regret entirely. However, no matter how out of step my politics were with the mainstream of Vassar College, The Miscellany News always offered me a safe, censorship-free space to express my ideas and hone my writing skills. I believe that this space has been valuable to me, and I hope it has been equally valuable to my readership, whom I wish to thank for taking the time out of your days to read a little bit about some important issues to which you may not have devoted much thought.

Page 15

Jesser Horowitz I also wish to thank the many editors at The Miscellany News that have provided so much help and guidance along the way, especially graduating Opinions Editor Steven Park. Steven, if you are a reading this, which I suspect that you are, I want you to know that I have tremendous, tremendous respect for you. I would lucky to be even half the writer that you are. I owe you personally a monumental debt. Your notes and supervision have made me a far better writer than I could ever hope to be without you.

The Miscellany News is a strong, proud institution—one that I am pleased to call the home to my writings. You can be certain that I’ll write back every once in a while to defend the dignity of the Oxford Comma, the greatest invention of the English language. I’ll be reading next year from across the sea. I’ll miss this paper.

To Chabad 2015 was a difficult year to be a Jew at Vassar College. I don’t intend to delve into the details as this precise moment, but suffice to say that quite a few students at Vassar disguised blatantly anti-Semitic actions as mere criticism of Israel, and many of my Jewish friends either shied away from Jewish life or decided to leave the school entirely.

It wasn’t the first time I had ever faced anti-Semitism, but it was my first time confronting popular anti-Semitism—whenever some ill-informed kid back home made some comments about Jews, I could reliably know that it wouldn’t be received well; for the first time, now, I couldn’t be so sure.

Even explicit anti-Semitism—a student writing “fuck Jews” on YikYak, for example—was dismissed as merely an attempt to criticize Israel. It’s hard to be proud of who you are in such an environment.

It was my friend Jason Storch ’17 who first invited me to attend Chabad services with him. “Invited” may be the wrong word for it—he had almost demanded it as a way to avoid rhetorical hypocrisy. I spent much of my first-year writing in defense of Israel and the Jewish people’s right to self-determination, and he would not have me being yet another “as a Jew, Jew,” as he called it. If this was fight I was committed to, I needed to at least try to engage with my Jewish identity.

I owe him a tremendous debt. Jason, if

you’re reading is, which you most definitely are, thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Attending weekly Shabbat services at the Chabad was one of the best decisions I ever made, and it’s one that I know I would have been unable to make without his push.

I immediately fell in love with Chabad: I was the only one of my siblings to ever take a liking to services as a kid, and although at that point I was still an atheist, I felt an almost tangible power that came with services. In the faith of others I found a personal faith. I started going every week—and a year later I started wearing a yarmulke.

My original reasons for doing so were more cultural than religious—I was tired of passing. I wanted to be visible, I wanted everyone I met to know who I am and what I value. I still didn’t think I really believed in God, and I never thought I would. And yet, while attending the most secular school in the United States of America, I found God in a small house off Fulton Avenue. This has had a more profound impact that any other event in my life. I’m a more open person now, a more accepting person.

I also entered a loving community of people who care about me. The Rabbi and his family, who taught me so much about Judaism, and the myriad of people I’ve met there over the years, are like a home away from home. They have transformed the course of my life. I pray they will continue to shape lives for years to come.

To the Access Executive Board At the end of my first year, my friend Charles Callejo, then the President of Access, approached me with an offer to take over the org from him. I was still coming to terms with myself as a disabled person, and had never before done serious advocacy work. But, I took the job, in part because of its importance and in part due to my own arrogance. I’ve been President throughout my sophomore, junior and senior years, overseeing good times and bad. I hope now that I have designed something that has the ability to last.

To the members of Access, thank you for giving me the chance to lead our little band of activists for the past three years. Thank you for taking on the fight, and for the first time making me truly confident that it will survive long after I’ve graduated. Remember the words of Justin Dart: “Oppressed

americans have made a miracle of progressive, but for too many of us the dream is still a promise to be kept….We have learned a hard lesson, nobody is going to give us the dream...We who have been left out must unite with all who love justice.”

To the Mock Trial Executive Board When I took over the Mock Trial Team halfway through my freshman year, we were on the verge of becoming defunct. As I look back on all the progress we’ve made, it’s hard to even grasp how far we’ve come.

Seeing every one of you train every year to become the best lawyers and witnesses you can be is honestly one of the most profound honors of my life. It’s humbling to know how much talent our team has. All of you have promising careers ahead. I believe in you, and in the team that we helped build together. Thank you, for spending so much time with us.

To Dylan Smith ’20, Brianna Serredas, Jonas Trostle ’21 and Lyla Menaker ’22—thank you for keeping the org alive. Thank you for dedicating your time and energy next year to leading our group forward. No matter how we do, how many tournaments we win, how we perform in the end, I’ll be watching from across the sea with pride.

To my campus family It’s funny how little choice we have in who enters our lives. I have in fallen in love with so many people on this campus—there are friends I’ve made during my time here that I consider family. There are so many people who have made this campus a home for me that I would not dare to even attempt to list them. I would hate to not thank someone who deserves it. And so I thank you all, and hope that those of you reading know who you are, and how much I love you.

My campus family have done a service for me that I do not believe I could repay in a thousand lifetimes: they have improved the course of my life, made me a better person and gave me a home at a college where I never thought I would have one. I believe that I am ready to graduate. I know that I am not ready to leave you. Saying goodbye is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. `So, I choose not to do so here. Instead, thank you. Thank you for your love and support over these past four years. I couldn’t be here with you. I love you all.

Bryan Ruby After transferring to Vassar, leaving school, planting roots in the music industry and returning to graduate, Bryan Ruby reflects on a collegiate career full of unexpected twists. t was 2:08 a.m. in Poughkeepsie when I got the text: “5pm tomorrow. Douglas Corner Cafe. Tennessee. He will be there.” I was coming off a full day of class, a meeting with a professor and two hours of pre-season “captains practice” for our baseball team (a tiring ordeal because, as captain, I had to both play and run practice). It was the first Monday of school in January, and I had just returned to Vassar after taking a leave of absence the previous fall semester. I was tired, sweaty and just beginning to settle back into my routine at school. Yet here I was, about to leave again.

Let me back up. I didn’t take a leave of absence because I’m bad at school, per se. I left school because I didn’t want to go to school.

Big difference. You see, I’m a songwriter. My dream is to write songs and sell them to famous artists. After dropping out in the fall, I wrote songs by day and worked as an Uber driver by night. I saved up money by sub-

I

letting an 8-by-11 foot room in my cousin’s apartment. Every time I could scrounge up enough money, I’d commute up to NYC and pay for subsidized studio time in a music studio owned by Vassar graduate Chris Connors ’12. We’d record everything I had recently written and then ship the song demos out to people in the music industry. Sounds like a cool semester away, right? Cramped, but cool. Wait, I’m getting away from myself.

Back to the text...

You see, the message I received that fateful night in January wasn’t a regular text.

Between the lines of that 10-word text sat a clear message: If you show up tomorrow, you’ll get to be in the same room as one of the most well-connected people in the entire music industry. No matter that it was past midnight in Poughkeepsie. No matter that I had class the next day. No matter that the meeting place was 942 miles away in Nashville, Tennessee, and there was no way my beat-up car could survive the trip. This was my chance. I wanted to go. No, I HAD to go.

I sprung into action—I threw a few

days worth of clothes in my backpack and slapped together a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for the road. I found an $89 Southwest Airlines flight to Nashville out of Boston, and I began the 3.5 hour overnight drive to the airport in silence, wary of the risk I was about to take. I got pulled over in Connecticut for speeding (sorry Mom!), but still managed to make it to Boston Logan just in time for wheels up.

After a long night of travel, I arrived in the early morning hours at the Nashville airport.

I had no place to stay, so I booked a cheap Airbnb using the airport WiFi and set out to catch some sleep before the fateful night that was to come.

As dusk fell upon Music City, I showed up at said music venue and waited in the back, sweating, just hoping I’d get a minute alone with the Big Whig. People skills are my forte, and I knew that if I could just come out of there with his email and a favorable impression, I’d be set.

It turns out, I didn’t get a minute alone with him...I got 15, a direct line to contact him in the future and the numbers of sever-

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

al other influential people in the room that night. Weeks later, after sending him the entirety of my songwriting portfolio, I was sitting in my room back in Poughkeepsie when an email from him upon my screen. Only four words, but a message I’d been waiting to hear for a long, long time. It read: “This is really good.” I’d taken the risk, pushed my fears to the side, and emerged with a foundation for the road ahead.

Back at school, my life (for the most part) returned to normal. Besides the occasional quick trip into NYC for a music meeting, I’ve been able to enjoy my last semester as a college student and athlete. Big dreams may be on the horizon, but for now, there’s been a certain beauty in getting to experience college life just like everyone else. As we move on, I’d like to say how grateful I am that I got to go to school here. It’s been a crazy journey, and I want to thank my friends, my mentors in the community and most of all my teammates for their support. Vassar is a special place.

Rock on, Bryan Ruby

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SENIOR RETROSPECTIVES

May 26, 2019

Tamar Ballard I

’m writing this while sitting in my room in SoCo 3. It’s humid, even with the fan on. I’ve sat in this spot on my bed so much that my mattress topper remembers the ways I like to sit or lay down as I do work or watch embarrassingly long marathons of beauty tutorials, home DIYs and cooking demos that I’ll never do.

This space feels like the CCMPR on my first night on campus. It’s 2015. Luis Inoa is standing in the middle of a circle made up of this year’s Transitions cohort, and I’m in a Spongebob Squarepants tank top, black sweater and denim capris. I decide to never wear the Spongebob tank top, black sweater and denim capris again. Luis is teaching us how to do culture sculptures—and that pipe cleaners are really called chenille stems—and the different ways that you can respond when someone asks you, “Where are you from?” We’re all looking at him in amazement. He finds ways to bring the love and care from home into this space.

I remember that throughout my four years here. My first college friends are Black and brown first-generation/low-income students like me. We spend the next week getting to know each other better than I’d ever expected to get to know someone within

the first week of being in college.

It feels like Noyes’ Jetson Lounge. It’s 2016 and the day before classes start. I’m nervous because this is the first time “We Got You” is happening, and I’m hoping the few flyers I put up and the single pan of brownies topped with blue icing will be enough to get people to come. But all my worrying subsides within the next 20 minutes; I’m looking around at all of the people of color who are gathered in Noyes to talk about existing in a Black or brown body, especially at a school like Vassar. Especially in a world like ours. There’s anger and frustration. There are tears and silence.

But there’s also laughter. There’s smiling and joy. And it’s beautiful.

It feels like the hours spent, during the following months, sitting with my friends at the big table near the side rooms that branch off of the Jetson. It’s 2017. The sun shines through the words of affirmation that, as a house, we wrote in paint on the windows, reminding the world that “love is love,” “black lives matter” and “no one is illegal.” A reclamation of space that affirms the right to live and love during a time where lives and love are under attack

by Twitter storms, hate crimes and sense-

less separation of families. Poet Eve Ewing reminds us to “speak [these to ourselves] until [we] know [they’re] true.” So we speak them, write them and embody them as a community. At the table, my friends and I pretend to do homework, but we’re really waiting for 10 p.m. to hit, so that someone can collect VCards to take with them to the Kiosk in Main. Orders of chai milkshakes, chicken nuggets and brownie cookies are collected in a mad rush to get the order-runner to the Kiosk before the line gets too long. We rinse and repeat the next day.

It feels like the second floor of Main.

It’s 2018. I’ve started growing some kind of flowering plants near the big window in the VSA office, despite VSA Exec clowning my plant-growing skills. Sometimes when I water them, someone I love waves to me from the entrance of the College Center. It feels like Heather Nguyen ’20 screaming my name from the window of the Info Desk as I make my rounds to the President’s Office and Dean of the College office. I’ve never entered these spaces until this year, but now it’s rare for me to miss a day. An offer of coffee or tea from Katie Bell starts a long brainstorming session

Kimberly Nguyen O

n the first day of Orientation, when everyone told me that college just flies by, I didn’t believe it. In the moment, time doesn’t seem to move at all. Each year, the last remnants of summer—when the A/Cless dorms were absolute torture—seemed to want to stick around forever. That 10:30 a.m. class on Shakespeare ceaselessly dragged on. The weekend never came fast enough. Yet here I am, in the blink of an eye, somehow at the end.

It seems like just yesterday that I moved into my first-year room in Jewett. Orientation week was a blur, probably just like senior week will be. I remember it being extremely hot. I remember being scared I wouldn’t make any friends. I remember how quickly I made Vassar my home, and now I’m flying the coop again. I’m going to have to learn how to make another place home.

It didn’t hit me when I moved into my TA at the beginning of last semester, and it hasn’t hit me yet as I’m beginning to pack my things away, that this is the last time I will call this place home. I will miss taking pictures of the cotton candy sunsets and strolling around Sunset Lake. Never again will I lounge on the quad with friends during springtime, procrastinating on finals. I will miss texting my friends and inviting them to Deece with me every night, or sharing my mango sticky rice with my best friend after finals. I will miss living within five minutes of all my close companions and being able to just walk to hang out with them.

Truth be told, I am terrified of leaving this all behind. I have dreaded graduating since the beginning of college. Some people say that life post-grad is awesome, but I can’t yet fathom it. How could it be awesome with my friends scattered all around the country and the world? Will I even be able to make new ones in the real world? Will people in the real world like me enough to even want to be my friend?

What patch of green grass will I ever feel at home enough again to lounge on?

“[T]he achievement that I’m most proud of is that I catalysed the raise of Vassar’s student wage for the students who will come after me.”

I also feel like there’s so much I still have to do and still so much I need to accomplish. I regret that I didn’t know college was going to fly by so quickly and that I didn’t seize more opportunities as they came my way. I need to go back and take Art History 101. I still need to join the yearbook and rowing or maybe try out for a cappella again, despite not getting called back my freshman year. And perhaps writing this in itself is a manifestation of my anxiety that I didn’t write enough Misc ar-

ticles. I should’ve written so many more.

But there are so many things I did do. I took classes that interested me. I completed a double major (by accident). I fell in love with poetry. I self-published two volumes of my own poetry. I studied abroad in England and then went to France and Ireland. I learned how to cook for myself.

And the achievement that I’m most proud of is that I catalysed the raise of Vassar’s student wage for the students who will come after me. Not everyone gets the privilege of leaving a legacy, and I’m so grateful to have had the opportunity to leave mine.

At the end of the day, despite being in denial and despite my desire to procrastinate on packing, I am going to leave this place. Before I go, I want to leave one last legacy. I have three pieces of advice I’d like to give underclassmen so they are more ready to leave than I am when their time finally comes: 1. No deadline is that deep. Take care of yourself and be with your friends as much as you can.

2. Don’t let fear stop you from joining that org. This is the last time in your life you can be fearless and reckless.

3. So this is the last time you can be fearless and reckless. Make it count.

I may be leaving Vassar, but Vassar will never leave me. I will carry this place, and all the memories and friends I made in my heart until the end of my days. I love you.

Thank you, Vassar, for the best college experience a person could ask for. I can’t wait to see you again at reunion.

where the two of us talk about everything from the meaning of life to how terrible—but also how hilarious—low-budget horror movies are. Carlos Alamo eventually emerges from his table next door. He offers up his 20 minutes of alone time to let me hang around until his next meeting. Eventually my seat on the couch, on the other side of his office, turns into a seat at the table. I can smell the essential oils better from here. I walk into the President’s Office to a chorus of “Hi, Tamar!” from Angela DePaolo, Veronica Peccia, Ilene Cooke and Wesley Dixon (and President Bradley, when I’m able to catch her in between meetings). Angela gives me the biggest hug that I didn’t realize I needed.

It gives me the energy to get through the rest of the week. Out of habit, I grab a cup of tea, as Wes invites me to sit in the seat I frequent in his office; I’m laughing basically every 10 seconds, as he catches me up on anything and everything. I’ve already made plans to come back tomorrow, as I head back to my room.

It’s hot and humid, even with the fan on.

But these spaces, this place, these memories—they feel a little bit like home.

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Congratulations Lorraine! Let’s keep up the good work.

From, Mom, Dad and sisters MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

May 26, 2019

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May 26, 2019

Welcome to Vassar! Important locations are circled below.

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