Misc3 3 16

The Miscellany News

Volume CXLVIII | Issue 15

March 3, 2016

Since 1866 | miscellanynews.org

Vassar College Poughkeepsie, NY

VSA hears all sides of BDS debate Trivia night in Mug embraces geeky flare A Jeremy Middleman and Jorge Gruber News Editor and Guest Reporter

Kaitlynn Vo Reporter

“T

welve deforming tendencies of this activty were identified by an advocate of its ‘non-transparent’ type named Antoine Berman.

The difficulties of this activity when faced with non-disjunctive concepts, such as Homer’s chloros, are discussed in an essay by Friedrich Schleiermacher. Eugene Nida contrasted the ‘formal equivalent’ variety of this activity with the ‘dynamic equivalence’ variety, which is essentially the same as its...”

Jeremy Middleman/The Miscellany News

t their Feb. 28 meeting, the VSA reviewed the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions (BDS) Resolution and Amendment to the VSA Bylaws authored by Students for Justice in Palestine (SJP) and Jewish Voice for Peace (JVP), as well as the Anti-Occupation Resolution put forward by J Street U. The VSA Council conducted the review in preparation for the decisive March 6 vote where the VSA will vote on the adoption of the resolutions. The forum was conducted as an open forum where members from both orgs explained their resolutions and addressed questions and concerns.

VSA President Ramy Abbady ’16 included the resolutions in an email to the student body discussing the structure of the Feb. 28 forum. The BDS Amendment restricts the use of VSA funds from purchasing products of both Israeli and American companies that ei­ ther are located in Israeli settlements in Palestine or financially support the Israeli military or its occupation of Gaza and the West Bank including Sabra, Tribe, Ben & Jerry’s, Hewlett-Packard Company, Ahava, General Electric, Eden Springs, Motorola, Caterpillar, G4S and Elbit Systems. The BDS Resolution also supports Vassar College’s divestment from products from the same companies. The Anti-Occupation Resolution allows all students and orgs to decide how to See VOTE on page 4

On Sunday, Feb. 28 the VSA heard arguments both for and against the SJP and JVP resolutions and the counter-resolution proposed by J Street U.

Chances are, for those not totally tied into the academic trivia at the collegiate level loop, this format of inquiry has yet to be experienced.

But for a select subset of undergraduate students at academic institutions across the nation, this question-answer model barely registers as unexpected. In fact, for a majority of these students, hearing this first small sound-bite of an upcoming question signals to them that a Quiz Bowl tournament round is about to go down.

See TRIVIA on page 7

New Spark lights up the Palmer Gallery Stoddard Meigs Guest Reporter

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hat if Vassar was rated not by acceptance rate or by endowment, not by a private company like Forbes or by students like on collegeprowler.com, but by the government, on how much its graduates earned after graduation? As seniors hunt for jobs, many might be bemoaning the choice of an obscure major. What is the investment in college really worth? Opportunity might sum up the reasons quite nicely. One opportunity provided by

the Biology Department this week is an exhibit called “Spark!” in the college center, which provides a unique blend of arts and science.

In 2014, the Obama administration called for just such a rating of 7,000 colleges and universities. And this past week the New York Times ran an article titled, “A Rising Call to Promote STEM Education and Cut Liberal Arts Funding” in which it outlined the rising effort in America to “nudge students away from the humanities and toward more See SPARK on page 6

Bball Seniors reflect VRDT’s annual showcase nears on successful careers I Matt Stein Reporter

Jamie Anderson Guest Reporter

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Inside this issue

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Film majors seek out stories that FEATURES go untold

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t is a universal truth that anybody can dance. To become a good dancer, however, can take years of classes and concentration, performing countless pirouettes and arabesques and assemblés. And here at Vassar, we have a fair share of great dancers. In fact, we have a whole

by both faculty and students.

VRDT, currently directed by resident choreographer Steve Rooks, gives students the opportunity to further study the art of dance and provides numerous performance opportunities. Every fall, the repertory holds auditions that will determine the pool of dancers they will use for the year.

See DANCE on page 16

courtesy of VRDT via Facebook

he Vassar College women’s basketball team recently wrapped up a tumultuous and frustrating 1015 season which saw them come up short of their aspirations for a trip to the Liberty League post-season tournament. The difference between making and missing out on the tournament was razor thin. Six of the games the Brewers dropped against Liberty League Conference competition were decided by three points or fewer. While missing out on the opportunity to continue competing, the Brewers did steadily improve their results over the course of the season.

The team experienced much of their struggles early on; however, as players returned from winter break, the Brewer women began rounding into form. The team faced a litany of difficult opponents, including predominantly Liberty League competition.

Despite these challenges, the Brewer women upped their level and experienced a great deal of success after the start of the spring semester.

The team went 6-3 in their last nine games, a run which also included a season-ending pair of Conference victories against Bard College, a comprehensive 82-42 trouncing, and Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, 88-74.

The women’s basketball squad can

take these improved results and momentum with them into the offseason.

Head Coach Candice Brown will have to do without several key performers next year though, as four Brewer Basketball players competed in their final game for Vassar College this winter against RPI. Senior guards Alex Moon and Caitlin Drakeley, as well as forwards Rose Serafini and Colleen O’Connell will be graduating in just a couple months.

Forward Alex Moon bookended her interrupted collegiate basketball career at Vassar College on a distinctively positive note. In her last season on the court for the Brewers, she played an integral part on the team.

The senior out of Mission Hills, Calif. started in 18 out of 24 games played during her final season. She led the team in assists during the ’15-’16 season, dishing out an average of four per game, while racking up 95 overall. She was also featured in the top five in two other statistical categories. Moon finished her senior season with 26 steals, tying for third on the team. She was also the fourth-best rebounder on the team, nabbing an average of 4.2 per game, with 101 over the full course of the season. After returning to the team for the second half of her junior year, Moon was recognized for her accomplishments in the classroom with a 2014-2015 Liberty League All-AcaSee HOOPS on page 18

company. The Vassar Repertory Dance Theatre (VRDT) will be performing at the Bardavon, displaying their wide array of talented dancers and choreographers.

This weekend, VRDT will be presenting its 34th Annual Bardavon Gala performances at the Bardavon Opera House in Poughkeepsie. These performances include pieces choreographed

VRDT’s annual performance at Poughkeepsie’s Bardavon Theater is the culmination of a year’s worth of work. The show is comprised of faculty and student-choreographed pieces that have been rehearsed, performed and critiqued.

Jeb bids farewell to Presidential bid, HUMOR embraces afterlife

15 ARTS

Student bands go head-to-head in musical mele

The Miscellany News

Page 2

March 3, 2016

Editors-in-Chief Palak Patel Noble Ingram

Senior Editors Anika Lanser Rhys Johnson

Ashley Pecorelli/The Miscellany News

Spoken word poet Andrea Gibson gave a performance at Vassar on Friday, Feb. 26. They showcased their poetry in the Villard Room, and also led a smaller group workshop on gender on Saturday, February 27. To see more photos of life at Vassar, visit exposure.miscellanynews.org!

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March

Thursday

James Mundy, American Stories 1800-1950

4:00pm | Loeb | Loeb Art Center

Transitions Wisdom Dinner 5:00pm | Kenyon 205 | CDO

Louise Stevenson Lecture 5:30pm | Taylor 203 | History

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March

Friday

Close Knit: A SAVP Self Care Series Event 3:00pm | Faculty Parlor | Health Education

Vassar College Majors Concert 8:00pm | Aula | Vassar College Majors

Peter Beinart: The Crisis of Zionism

ComedyNormative Stand Up

Lecture by Professor Koechlin

Meishi Smile

5:30pm | Rocky 200 | J Street U

6:00pm | Rocky 300 | Democracy Matters

NoViCE Concert

9:00pm | Sanders 212 | Comedy Normative

10:00pm | Mug | Asian Students’ Alliance

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March

Saturday

There is a Field

7:00am | CC MPR | Jewish Voice for Peace at Vassar College

34th Annual Bardavon Gala

8:00pm | Off-Site Bardavon | Dance Department

Vassar College Orchestra

8:00pm | Skinner Recital Hall | Music Department

Joss Presents: Battle of the Bands

8:00pm | Shiva | Josselyn House

The Limit Comedy Show

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March

Sunday

Drop-In Drawing

1:30pm | Loeb | Loeb Art Center

Sophomore Sundaes Sunday 2:00pm | Rose Parlor | Class of 2018

34th Annual Bardavon Gala

3:00pm | Off-Site Bardavon | Dance Department

Marka Young, violin

3:00pm | Skinner Recital Hall | Music Department

Paper Critique

9:00pm | Rose Parlor | The Misc

8:00pm | Sanders Classroom 212 | The Limit

9:00m | Mug | ViCE

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March 3, 2016

NEWS

Page 3

Grayson illuminates forgotten narratives in WWI history Eilis Donohue

Assistant News Editor

M

courtesy of Goldsmiths, University of London

ore than 100 years after the First World War began, its effects still linger on. On Feb. 25, days after the anniversary of the start of the bloodiest battle of the war, University of London Professor Richard Grayson gave a lecture titled “Military History from the Street: New Findings in Ireland’s History of the First World War.” He focused on the contribution of volunteers from Belfast, the capital of Northern Ireland, as part of the British army.

While most academic treatment of the war in the UK centers around Britain, Grayson chose to concentrate on Ireland, in part due to familial connections, and in part because it is a demographic not often well-remembered in academia.

Grayson’s lecture demonstrated the difficult task historians face in seeking to faithfully record details of such an overwhelmingly large conflict. He sorted through thousands of army records and newspapers to find accurate information about soldiers from Belfast.

The politics involved in the War, which still flavor the national atmosphere today, are complex, and mostly centered around the approval or disapproval of Home Rule–whether Ireland should be a sovereign nation. Republicans advocate for a free Ireland, while Unionists, sometimes termed Loyalists, desire one united nation, generally under Britain. The creation of Northern Ireland, a separate country from both nations, came as a compromise, though not one everyone was satisfied with. The nation still struggles today with issues of identity. Grayson explained, “The colonization of Ireland happened at the same time that the British were colonizing America. It’s no easier to get the British out of Ireland than it is to get the ‘Americans’ off Manhattan. That’s not happening.”

Grayson also drew parallels to modern conflicts, asserting that Irish Unionists today identify with Israel, to the surprise of Israel itself, and Republicans side with Palestine. The idea that Unionists see themselves as a colonizing body

shows that the same issues which plagued the world a century ago are still present today. Lesher agreed, “We still don’t listen to our colonial and imperial voices. Most of the countries who engage in imperialist colonialist acts, including the United States, still hold some of those colonial areas. Those are still voices that we’re not listening to and not acknowledging.”

While the effects of the War were felt more keenly in certain areas of the world than others, its impact in terms of military ideology were global. “It matters because it was the first militarized war,” stated Lesher. “Once we militarized for the First World War and made all these munitions and destructive things, we never demilitarized ... We’ve been living in a state of war since that war happened.”

Ireland at least is working towards internal peace through memorialization efforts, in forms ranging from traditional stone monuments to modern murals. Instead of fixating on the historical divide, the Irish are collaborating to remember fallen ancestors and countrymen. Mary Lesher ’16 commented, “After the troubles in the [19]70s and 80s, when there was so much tension...in Northern Ireland, they tried to find a common denominator for people on both sides of the aisle to come together on, [and that] was the First World War, because both Unionists and Nationalists had worked together in this war, sometimes fighting side by side.” Kennett speculated, “The explosion of memorialism [about] WWI is quite surprising but is also very tangible.

The centenary of the start of the War saw a huge outpouring in the UK–bigger than might have been expected on say the half-centenary.”

The centenary of 1916 is particularly crucial for the Irish. The Easter Rising and the Battle of Somme confirmed the rift between Unionists and Republicans that year. Professor of Economics David Kennett wrote in an emailed statement, “[T]he Easter Rising was a major turning point in the Irish independence movement. Where home rule was the objective of all but a few, the heavy, punitive hand of the British gave a huge impetus

On Feb. 25, University of London Professor Richard Grayson came to Vassar to discuss WWI. Unlike most scholars, however, Grayson spoke on the often-ignored narratives of the Irish. to Sinn Fein [Republican movement]. Viewed from the other side, the Rising was seen as a ‘stab in the back’ when Britain was involved in a ‘just war’ elsewhere.”

Grayson believes it is important to tell both sides of this story precisely because these narratives are not generally well known. “I think it’s been the case that ever since the First World War period, the different communities have told very partial and separate stories, as if they were inhabiting different worlds,” he explained. “The history is a symbol but also a contributor to the ways in which people live their lives, in quite a divided manner.”

Understanding history, according to Grayson, is essential to understanding contemporary events. “Of course, history can help us to understand a lot of today’s problems. History helps us

avoid making the mistakes of the past–we just make different ones instead. It doesn’t stop us making mistakes.”

100 years on, the echoes of WWI are visible in the military and political legacy it left behind, but the individuals involved are no longer remembered. In discussing this issue, Lesher quoted historian James Axtell. In his book “After Columbus,” he writes, “Like politicians, historians have constituents who need their services and fair representation ... But for the historian, constituents’ rights do not end at the grave; they really begin there because the dead are no longer able to speak for themselves or to ensure that what is said and written about them squares with their vision of the truth.” Lesher summarized, “That’s why I do history: to give people who don’t have a voice, a voice.”

MESC, SJP-sponsored speaker explores identity via theater Clark Xu

Guest Reporter

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uring a late evening after class, the Palestinian flag made a controversial appearance in Rockefeller Hall. 18 Vassar orgs and pre-orgs lent public support to Najla Said’s solo-performance of her play “Palestine” and reading of her book “Looking for Palestine” on Feb. 24 and 25.

Said’s message of peace came at a time when race relations in America, the U.S. presidential race and ongoing conflict in the Middle East are sources of great stress and conflict.

Said is a Palestinian Lebanese American Christian who grew up in Manhattan, N.Y., with a clash of politics, religion and kinship. Her father Edward Said grew up as an Arab Christian, a religious minority in the Arab population. He emigrated from Israel in 1951 when the Victoria College of Egypt expelled him and his parents sent him to boarding school in Massachusetts.

Although a native-born American citizen, Said

faced the same misunderstanding as her father had a generation earlier. She reflected, “Everybody said, ‘You must be Jewish.’ Then I said, ‘I must be.’”

She looked for artistic inspiration not from her father, a prominent literary critic and author, but rather from major literary figures of the Black Arts Movement and its immediate intellectual successors, and particularly author Toni Morrison. Said noted, “When my father passed away, I became the person to carry the legacy. I wasn’t expecting it, but it happened to me. If you’re Palestinian-American, you’re always politicized.” She remembered, “I grew up here and I felt alone because of the school that I went to, the people that I talked to, and the neighborhoods that I lived in. Then I realized that solidarity is the greatest form of love.”

At the turn of the millennium, Said quietly worked in theatre drama, but began to consider contemporary issues in the decade after Sept. 11,

courtesy of Facebook

Najla Said’s reading of her play and book on Feb. 24 and 25 explored the various dynamics of nationality and identity, as well as addressing different mediums for activism and solidarity.

beginning with Arab-American issues and extending her commentary to a broader spectrum of ethnic conflict in the U.S. She co-founded Nibras Theatre Collective and calls her artistic production a form of political activism for both Arab-Americans and American egalitarianism.

She attested, “To be an activist, you don’t have to be an academic who writes papers, or a pundit on TV. I think you can be an activist through art. My story is not just for Arab-Americans.

This is a country of immigrants, and our experiences overlap.”

Despite the power of artistic expression, Said remains doubtful about the immediate American political climate. She acknowledged, “In terms of the U.S. presidential elections, no Arab-American has ever wholeheartedly voted for a candidate. In that sense, I am not American at all. I will always be voting for the lesser of two evils. My friends tell me about Bernie Sanders and their hopes for his policy in the Middle East. I think that for the U.S. President, no matter who is elected to office, it is not possible to be with the Palestinian people.”

However, Said takes heart in the growing concern and empathy of the general public for Arab-American issues and conflict in the Middle East. She stated, “The struggle for Palestinians and Arabs and human rights is part of the struggle for all people. If you are not Palestinian, if you could come to understand the struggle of another people, then you have the power to help others understand the conflict by simply engaging in dialogue.”

Said also affirmed her deep appreciation for her background, despite struggling with identity growing up. She said, “I loved my culture even when I was pretending not to be from it.

It was my life, my friends, my family; it made me happy, and it made me feel safe.” An anonymous member of Middle Eastern Student Collective and Students for Justice in Palestine was grateful for Said’s decision to speak out. They affirmed, “As an Arab-American, there were many things that Said explained in her performance and talk that really struck a chord with me, particularly her desire as a teenager to be whitewashed and even to disappear, which is

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

something many minorities in the U.S. internalize, but especially, as she brought up, Arab and Muslim-Americans after 9/11, and currently after events such as Charlie Hebdo, the Paris Attacks and San Bernadino.”

Member of Jewish Voice for Peace Ethan Cohen ’16 also identified with Said’s experiences, despite being an Arab Jew, while Said is an Arab Christian. Cohen clarified, “It is always important to look for nuance. It is very dangerous to assume that, if you put Jews and Arabs in the same place, then they will fight.”

Students responded well to hearing about these issues from an artist-activist. Cohen expounded, “Music, plays, art in general, are transnational. It has its own kind of language and people have been using it as a form of resistance since oppression was invented. You don’t combat destruction with destruction; you combat destruction with creation.”

Said’s observations on U.S. politics are mirrored in current campus climate. Cohen reflected, “As for Zionist alumni, I don’t expect them to change their beliefs. But I do expect them to be legal and respectful in their opposition to us. Some members of our group have been harassed on Facebook. Zionist alumni and regular Zionists have posted students’ residential addresses and attempted to contact their future employees.”

The anonymous student agreed, “There is a clear power dynamic between Zionist students and Middle East and North African students on campus, in that Zionist students have clear administrative support, which is troubling to me given the erasure and discrimination against Arab and Muslim voices that is inextricably linked with the political ideology and colonial project of Zionism. The main problem in terms of administration, and even amongst the student body, is even having Arab voices heard when it comes to issues of racism against us, which is a privilege many students at this school already possess.” They summarized, “I just want my voice, and other Middle East and North African voices, to actually be heard, or even considered, at Vassar, and I hope that Najla’s powerful story was a step in that direction.”

Page 4 Outside the Bubble Catholic Archbishop Criticizes Church Affiliation with Girl Scout Organization St. Louis Archbishop Robert Carlson released a letter to priests, scout leaders and other Catholics urging priests to break ties with the Girl Scouts. The Feb. 18 statement suggests that the organization promotes values that are contrary to Catholic doctrines and morals.

In the letter, Carlson suggests that the Girl Scouts meet to ponder other Christian programs for girls. “We must stop and ask ourselves—is Girl Scouts concerned with the total well-being of our young women? Does it do a good job forming the spiritual, emotional, and personal well-being of Catholic girls?” Carlson wrote (US News, “St. Louis Archbishop Robert Carlson is urging priests to sever ties with the Girl Scouts,” 02.19.16).

He went on, “Girl Scouts is exhibiting a troubling pattern of behavior and it is clear to me that as they move in the ways of the world it is becoming increasingly incompatible with our Catholic values.” The tensions between the Church and the organization have long been stirring, but the archbishop overtly presented how the church intended to change its relationship with the Scouts, and also encouraged others to do the same.

The main tension between the Church and the organization is that the Girl Scouts contribute a percentage of local sales to Amnesty International, the Coalition for Adolescent Girls and Oxfam, all of which are organizations that support sex education and reproductive rights. The alternative suggested by the archdiocese was to divert the contributions to those organizations back to itself (New York Times, “Girl Scouts Face Opposition From St. Louis Archbishop,” 02.25.16).

The news set off angry Facebook debates among parents whose children attend Catholic schools with Girl Scouts troops. Many Girl Scouts advocates felt that the Church was attacking the organization without observing what the organization actually promotes. “I think they are too focused on other people the Girl Scouts may have some associations with rather than what our local girl scout chapters are actually doing,” said Parishioner at St. Pius V Catholic Church Julie Mudd.

“I think it all comes down to the fact they are threatened by anything that puts females in a leadership position,” Mudd said. Girl Scouts of Eastern Missouri CEO Bonnie Barczykowski said she expects that the archbishop’s statement will not affect community support for the organization. “Girls gain valuable social and leadership skills and the Girl Scout Cookie program is the most anticipated and participated-in activity in Girl Scouting,” she said. (Religion News, “St. Louis archbishop urges cutting ties with Girl Scouts,” 02.22.16).

—Jeremy Middleman, News Editor

consuming alcohol” (NBC News). Dr. Kennedy echoed these sentiments. “The findings mean more research is needed,” he said (NBC 15, “Drinking more coffee may help prevent alcohol-related cirrhosis,” 02.22.16).

—Ethan Baratz, Guest Reporter

March 3, 2016

Israel boycott decision discussed in forum VOTE continued from page 1 pursue related activism, condemns the occupation of the West Bank, the military blockade in Gaza and the maltreatment of Palestinian citizens in Israel. It also affects the VSA to create a committee comprised of VSA Council members, SJP, JVP, J Street U and other students.

The SJP and JVP representatives reasserted the tenets of their resolution and highlighted its moral urgency and communal significance as a means of standing in solidarity with the Palestinians against colonial practices perpetrated by Israel in the occupied territories. Commenting on the possible implications of a VSA endorsement, leading member of SJP Henry Rosen ’17 stressed the historical significance of the resolution and the feasibility of its execution. “For an institution to have an endowment of $1 billion, with its mind set on growth—it’s very difficult for an institution to lose financial momentum. At the same time, I’m confident, as are members of SJP, in an aspirational mode, that 10 to 20 years down the road, if Vassar had the option to divest and chose not to—that’s a blemish. Here’s another opportunity for Vassar to stand on the right side of history,” he said, referencing Vassar’s decision to join the movement to divest from South Africa in 1985, the momentous result of a campaign often cited by proponents of BDS as analogous to their own.

Representatives from J Street U emphasized that their main objection to the SJP resolution rests on its potential to stifle opposing views, erode the autonomy of dissenting orgs and cultivate a more divisive campus climate by tethering the school to a single approach to rectifying the situation in the occupied territories of Gaza and the West Bank. “We thought that the intent of [the SJP resolution] was to raise and uplift Palestinian voices and to fight towards the end of the occupation,” stated J Street U member Josh Schwartz ’18. “But we felt that the resolution framed things in a way that we disagreed with and that also dichotomized the resolution in a way that was unhelpful.” Elaborating further on what he perceives to be SJP’s push to monopolize the discourse surrounding BDS, Schwartz added, “I think in a lot of ways, what they do is to try and amplify their own voices as opposed to hearing a lot of people’s perspectives.”

SJP and J Street U fundamentally disagree on the course of action the VSA should take in response to related issues. Rosen said, “It’s my personal belief that both [J Street U’s] criticisms and their proposed alternatives don’t really hold up, and aren’t bearing very much water. What I see as the crux of their argument, which is that if the VSA endorses the BDS movement, it would prevent orgs and departments within its purview from inviting speakers or participants or making contracts with leftist Israeli NGOs, is patently false.” He continued, “We should be focused on the issue, which is ending our complicity in human rights abuses and apartheid, and not concerning ourselves with whether or not we’re harming leftist Israeli NGOs. At the end of the day, they’re not the ones who are going to bring about the end of apartheid: it’s grassroots organizers, international solidarity activists and Palestinians.”

The 2015-2016 year marks the first that the VSA is a political organization. After last week’s discussion, multiple VSA representatives and other students questioned the capacity of the Council to make an informed decision about BDS on campus. In reality, the VSA Council is still trying to understand what being a political entity means.

Abbady wrote in an emailed statement, “The VSA has not had an in-depth conversation about what a political VSA means beyond our guiding principles, which state that the VSA values and works towards anti-racism and intersectional feminism...

The VSA will, after spring break, discuss what politicization looks like going forward, in conjunction with newly elected people.”

At the same time as SJP’s events and discussions surrounding the BDS resolution, numerous racist events have fragmented the campus discourse. Since the beginning of the spring semester, there have been several bias incident reports including antisemitic and Islamophobic remarks on Yik Yak, as well as the drawing of a swastika on a dorm door. Town Houses Representative Maya Horowitz ’16 believed that there was a link between BDS-related campus events and racism.

She wrote in an emailed statement, “The BDS movement on this campus has given space for people to express their Islamophobic and antisemitic perspectives. In some ways, I think this is not all bad, as we need to actively reckon with our

racisms. But we have seemingly no desire to actually address the broader dynamics of racism that pertain to this issue.”

Many question SJP’s contributions to the campus climate. SJP apologized in 2014 after they published an antisemitic cartoon on their Tumblr account that initiated a Bias Incident investigation.

On how students including SJP have conducted campus conversations, Horowitz wrote, “I have always been told that anti-semitism lies just beneath the veneer of civil society, but I have truly been surprised and disappointed by the ways people talk about Jews on this campus...Vassar doesn’t yet know how to speak about anti-semitism while simultaneously speaking about the brutal treatment and suffering of Palestinians.”

Although SJP has been criticized for antisemititic behavior, it has the support of a number of Jews on campus, especially those in JVP. In defense of attacks against SJP and JVP’s insensitivity, JVP member Noah Mlyn ’19 said, “We see that a huge part of the push against BDS is to label it as antisemitic, as we know given the recent events in the national media. And I can say that that troubles and concerns me as a Jew—to believe in something strongly and then to be told that it is something contrary to my identity.”

In addition to the boycott of companies, the BDS Resolution and Amendment would also limit the representation of Israeli institutions on campus. SJP stated at the beginning of the Feb. 28 VSA meeting, “We support boycotting and divesting from those [academic] institutions [that support Israel’s military occupation] because those institutions are institutionally racist and they prevent non-Jewish people from attaining higher education. They are not symbols of higher education, they are symbols of apartheid and colonialism.”

SJP also noted that professors from Israeli institutions would be permitted to come to Vassar as long as they do not come representing their institutions.

Nevertheless, multiple VSA members and administrators perceive the academic boycott as contrary to the mission and policies of the college. Town Students Representative Eduardo de la Torre ’17 opined during the VSA meeting, “The boycott of academics is a little nerve-racking for me regardless of whether or not I agree with it because it feels like censorship.” President Catharine Hill agreed, suggesting that the college will not endorse the BDS resolution and amendment.

She wrote in an emailed statement, “Two years ago, the Dean of the Faculty and I rejected the American Studies Association call for a boycott of Israeli academic institutions, supported by the Boycott, Divestment, Sanctions movement. As we said at the time, Vassar College is firmly committed to academic freedom and the free exchange of ideas. We are opposed to boycotts of scholars and academic institutions and we strongly rejected the call for a boycott of Israeli academic institutions.”

Concerning the economic boycott contained in the amendment to the VSA Bylaws, some critiques centered around the potential consequences on the future of the VSA and the college. Lathrop House President Antony Manokhin ’18 elaborated on a potential financial consequence of the passing of the BDS resolution. He said during the VSA meeting, “What I’ve heard is that a resolution

like this threatens alumni donations for better or for worse for BDS ... Considering the resolution that does cause such fragility puts students here in a potentially dangerous situation [in terms of] their financials.” Manokhin also mentioned that pilot programs like The Posse Veterans Program– which grants full-ride scholarships to veterans– could suffer defunding as a result of the passing of the resolution and amendment.

“This [resolution] is breaking a precedent [as is] the amendment,” J Street U member Abigail Johnson ’17 suggested in the VSA Council meeting.

“I’ve been to VSA meetings since I was a freshman, and the VSA loves precedent. They love to see what was done before to see if something is just...I think that this resolution will be used in the future to be precedent for saying that Zionism is racism, or we have this BDS thing and J Street likes Zionism or is pro-Israel, so we need to defund J Street [and] we need to get rid of voices on campus.” SJP countered, saying that the final edited resolution and amendment would not contain reference to Zionism, but J Street U defended their claim, citing SJP’s anti-Zionist principles and the attempts of multiple members’–including co-writers of the BDS Resolution and Amendment Alexia Garcia ’18 and Henry Rosen ’17–attempt to restrict J Street U from attending a Zionist conference during the Dec. 15, 2015 VSA Council meeting.

“We believe these student groups have every right to exist on campus and express their views, as long as their actions are in accord with our policies,” Hill wrote of SJP’s presence on campus. Hill drew the line, however, with the BDS amendment, which would restrict orgs from purchasing products supportive of Israel’s military occupation.

Hill wrote, “At the same time, the college will not support the BDS movement or the use of college resources for the boycott of any goods or organizations as called for by BDS.” The President has the power to veto anything that would affect the college’s finances, meaning that she could reject the BDS Amendment if adopted by the VSA. The J Street resolution also received many critiques during the VSA Council meeting. Among them was the concern that the education committee proposed in the Anti-Occupation Resolution would prioritize certain issues on campus over others. Cushing House President Anish Kanoria ’18 said, “I appreciate the sentiment with this resolution. My concern with it, though, is the creation of this entity of people seems like the VSA is prioritizing this conflict over others and it’s prioritizing this form of oppression over others.”

He questioned why the VSA would not have a separate committee for discussing Islamophobia, oppression of Black people on campus and in the U.S., and refugees, among others.

After the presentation of the resolutions, the VSA decided not to send the BDS resolution vote straight to referendum. While many VSA Council members expect that the vote will be petitioned to go to referendum, they concluded that the VSA Council is capable of making an informed decision, as they have had many discussions on the issues and have tried to educate themselves. The Council motioned to have an anonymous vote on the J Street U resolution, but concluded on a public vote. The final resolutions will be voted on at the March 6 VSA Council meeting, but the result is petitioned, it may go to referendum anyway.

Jeremy Middleman/The Miscellany News

Report Links Coffee to Low Cirrhosis Rates Good news for coffee enthusiasts–according to a review published last week in the scientific journal Alimentary Pharmacology and Therapeutics, drinking coffee on a daily basis might help reduce your chances of developing cirrhosis, a slowly-progressing liver disease.

“Cirrhosis is potentially fatal and there is no cure,” said lead study author from Southampton University Dr. Oliver Kennedy. “Therefore, it is significant that the risk of developing cirrhosis may be reduced by consumption of coffee...” (NBC News, “Coffee May Protect Liver from Booze, Study Finds,” 02.22.16).

Kennedy and other UK researchers analyzed data from nine previous studies with more than 430,000 participants and found that those who regularly drank more coffee were less likely to develop liver cirrhosis later in life than those who drank less or no coffee. In particular, compared to no coffee consumption, researchers estimated a daily cup was tied to a 22 percent lower risk of cirrhosis (U.S. News Health, “Health Buzz: Coffee May Protect Liver From Alcohol,” 02.22.16).

“Coffee is a complex mixture containing hundreds of chemical compounds, and it is unknown which of these is responsible for protecting the liver,” Kennedy said. “But the correlation between coffee consumption and cirrhosis risk reduction looks promising–especially when considering the severity of the disease and its impact on patients worldwide” (NBC News).

Despite the potential benefits that coffee provides in combating cirrhosis, though, many clinicians urge that consumers not misread initial experimental results.

“Don’t start drinking excessive amounts of coffee,” said senior clinical nutritionist at NYU Langone Medical Center Samantha Heller. “Coffee contains compounds that have antioxidant effects and anti-inflammatory properties, but drinking a few cups of coffee a day still cannot undo the systematic damage that is the result of being overweight or obese, sedentary, or excessively

NEWS

On Sunday, Feb. 29 the VSA voted to keep the ballot for the J Street U resolution open to the public, despite having previously voted to secretly determine the fates of the BDS resolution.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

FEATURES

March 3, 2016

Page 5

Misc Seniors reflect fondly on memories of papers past Alan Hagins & Julia Cunningham Assistant Features Editors

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hat, you may ask, is so great about being a part of The Miscellany News? What is it about the Misc that draws in reporters and columnists, and spits out editors and, of course, the occasional professional journalist? Maybe you’re wondering what really goes on behind the scenes before those magical times when the paper appears on the bench across from the Kiosk in Main and you’re finally able to tear through it. The seniors on the Misc Editorial Board are probably the best versed to be able to explain every juicy detail of their decision-making process as they’ve experienced multiple aspects of the Misc from many different angles.

Where would campus be without its weekly crossword (occasionally extra challenging and without numbers) and its range of campus voices? The Miscellany News isn’t just another extra-curricular. It is more than just a 30+ hour weekly commitment. The work only begins once the section editors have received articles from the writers. Seniors have been through and seen it all: the good and the bad, the victories and the ugliness. Features wanted to share its appreciation of our seniors, so we asked them for the DL. Below, we’ve shared some information, and maybe even too much, about the lovely seniors of the Misc Ed Board.

Noble Ingram courtesy of Noble Ingram

How long have you been working for the Misc? Palak has me beat by two weeks because she started at the second edition freshman year. I started writing as a news reporter. My first article was on the front page. I don’t know, I think they were desperate. But I got hooked.

What does it feel like to be in the limelight every week? It doesn’t ever feel like being in the limelight. But if you google us we have a Wikipedia. No one talks about The Miscellany News writers. The times people talk about writers is opinions writers, when you hear someone’s voice. Generally, I feel like this is a weird dynamic, because I feel like there is a degree of anonymity working at the Misc even if you put your name out there every week. The arena you are writing to in the Misc is much broader than the campus.

We get comments from more people outside of campus than on it.

Favorite pickup line? “Date me, please.” Something polite.

Favorite periodical? You mean besides The Miscellany News?

Palak Patel

courtesy of Palak Patel

Spring break plans? I will be going to Ohio to stay with my friends and look for jobs online. Hopefully I’ll sleep, that will be nice.

Maybe I’ll get a job, that would be really nice.

Longest you’ve ever spent in production night? 6:30 a.m. I remember walking back to my dorm in Strong and closing the curtains because the sun was up. I had a 9:00 a.m. class.

(Did you go? Yes) History with the Misc? I started with Design in my freshman year, by second semester I was the Assistant Design Editor, and by sophomore year I was the Design Editor. I became a Senior Editor and finally, the Editor in Chief, a job I’ve had for over a year now.

Out of everyone in this office, I’ve probably written the least. I wanted to be involved with the newspaper and they didn’t have a design team, so I joined.

What will you miss most about the Misc? The people. I don’t think I would have done it this long if I didn’t like hanging out with everyone who’s on the Misc. It’s a lot of work every week, and it’s extremely taxing. The fun part is coming in on Tuesday night and knowing that you’re going to spend six to eight hours with the people in this room. You better like them. We drink coffee and stress out about the paper. I love hanging out with people at the Misc because we are all really dedicated to it. I don’t think we would be doing this if we didn’t secretly love it and hate it at the same time.

Pickup line? I don’t really have a pickup line I use on people, but I think I would probably wink.

Samantha Pianello

Alan Hagins

Spring break plans?

Spooning with my dog and watching “Friends” reruns, probably.

Favorite periodical?

If I had to pick one I’d probably say The New Yorker.

History with the Misc?

I started as a guest photographer in fall of sophomore year, so about two and a half years now!

What is the latest you’ve ever stayed at production night?

I think I was there until 2 a.m. once so I probably can’t complain as much as some of the others on Ed board, but it was still rough.

Favorite pickup line?

What will you miss most about the Misc?

I’ll definitely miss the people the most, and being able to just wander into random events and snap a photo without anyone really questioning me. I’ll also really miss the snacks.

courtesy of Samantha Pianello

“What’s your Neopets username?”

Zachary Rippe

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

What are you going to miss most about the Misc?

I am a new member of the Misc, but it feels like I’ve worked here much longer. Everyone in the office is so dedicated, and we manage to crank out an exceptional amount of information. Yeah, sometimes it’s sloppy, but I kind of like that—we’re college kids with no time and we make it work. There’s so much pressure, and yet we are always laughing. I’m going to miss collaboratively producing something meaningful every week.

courtesy of Alan Hagins

courtesy of Zachary Rippe

Spring break plans? My friends and I are planning a road trip that circles most of the southeast. We’re starting at Vassar and driving down the East Coast. We’ll hit Williamsburg, Va., Charleston, S.C., Savannah, Ga., Panama City, Fla. and end up in New Orleans for the weekend. We’ll head up through Jackson, Miss., across Tennessee through Nashville and the Smokey Mountains, before taking the Blue Ridge Parkway back up to West Virginia and eventually loop back to Vassar.

How long have you worked at the Miscellany News? I started writing columns for the sports section about a week or two into my freshman year with my good friend Eli. Eli and I both became sports editors our junior year–he was editor in the fall when I went abroad to London and I took over in the spring when he went to Argentina. I’ve been here ever since...

What is the latest you’ve ever stayed at the office? The latest I ever stayed was probably around 2:30 or so with my trusty ex-co-editor Erik Quinson. Usually the lateness is a result of articles not coming in rather than the actual work itself.

What is your favorite pickup line? “Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? ...Enough to break the ice. My name is Zach Rippe.”

What are you going to miss most about the Misc? Definitely the people. The work can be extremely frustrating at times, but it’s everybody in the office that keeps me going. The Misc helped me branch out a bit after coming back from abroad and I really value the opportunity to not only work close with all of these people, but become friendly with them as well. As stressful as it can be, we tend to have good times on production night!

How long have you been at the Misc? About six months. I started as a full-time reporter last semester and now I’m the Assistant Features Editor.

Latest production night? I stayed till 1:45 a.m. a couple weeks ago. Not setting any records with that one.

Spring Break? Spring break! I can’t wait. This year I’m going to Niagara Falls, Brown University, New York, Seattle and Portland. I might find time to apply to jobs.

Pickup line? “Can I have one of your fries?” I don’t know what I’d say to that. Probably yes, that’s a good start.

Favorite periodical? The New York Times. I just saw the op-ed columnist Frank Bruni lecture at UpC—that guy is a genius, I’ll be lucky if I ever get five minutes of that level of lucidity.

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FEATURES

March 3, 2016

Author Pankaj Mishra to reframe modern religiosity Julia Cunningham and Aditi Chadna Assistant Features Editor and Reporter

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term for religion in any of these languages: Chinese, Japanese, Korean, whatever. There’s no native term, the category doesn’t exist, per se. It’s a colonial category.”

Religion is such a broad term that it can be difficult to generalize. Carroll said, “Religion fascinates me because it is so deeply tied to humanity and its origins, and it provides insight into what people worry about and their questions about the world they live in.” Walsh went on to explain that part of Mishra’s lecture will probably have to include an explanation of his own definition of the word “religion.” “If I’m going to be unfair to him, I would think that he’s going to use it in a very common, everyday sense of ‘religion,’” he said.

The discussion of religion differs based on personal experiences, making a lecture on the subject and Mishra’s personal definition en-

courtesy of Vassar Communications

eligion is a multidisciplinary topic. It transcends mere culture and tradition and takes root in politics, economics and anthropology. On March 9, Pankaj Mishra will be discussing the role that religion plays in our modern world in his lecture sponsored by the Asian Studies Department, “Religion in the Modern World.”

Associate Professor of Religion and Director of Asian Studies Michael Walsh explained that while Mishra’s lecture is co-sponsored by the Religion Department, it is not only for religion majors. “He is a journalist, he is a novelist and he is somewhat of a public intellectual, so I don’t think he’s going to come from a heavy academic angle but I could be wrong,” Walsh said. He went on, “I am kind of curious. We said to him, as is quite typical with these big names, come and give a talk on whatever you want.”

Mishra has a reputation throughout many fields. Walsh said, “He writes stuff for The New Yorker, The New York Times, The Guardian in England and it’s on a range of topics. His latest book was looking at how Asia has reformulated both imagined and constructed, had very little to do with religion per se.” He added that Mishra’s writing covers many topics: “Mishra is the author of several books that examine cultural issues, including ‘From the Ruins of Empire: The Revolt Against the West’ and ‘the Remaking of Asia,’ which has been widely acclaimed.”

Walsh went on to speculate about Mishra’s choice of topic, “I have no idea exactly what he’s going to talk about, my guess is he’s probably going to touch on Islam a bit.” Were Mishra to bring up Islam in his lecture, Walsh explained, he would most likely be using the term “religion” in the colloquial sense. “But I’m hoping I’m wrong,” Walsh said. He went on, “I’m hoping that he’ll give a more sophisticated picture of it. One of his questions that he had on his poster blurb where he says: ‘Can one even be religious in the modern world? Given the impact of science, given the impact of ra-

tional thinking.’ But then he’s going to have to explain what do you mean by ‘being religious’ because that can mean a lot of different things.”

Although the topic is undecided as of yet, students have already thought about what they hope to gain from the lecture, which generally centers on a theoretical discussion of religion.

Madison Carroll ’18 who is planning on attending the lecture added, “It’s scary how much conflict belief can cause. It is really hard for me to cope with how much hatred and struggle there has been between religions, because that concept is so opposite from how I look at religion.” Walsh went on to say that religion itself is a touchy word. “In the study of religion, we all are very sensitive to talk about what the category means,” he said. It is a word that stems from Latin, and bears the taint of western imperialism. Walsh explained, “There is no native

Panjak Mishra, shown above, is the author of several books that examine modern cultural religious issues. Mishra is also a columnist for Bloomberg Review and the New York Times Book Review.

ticing. Carroll explained, “In my opinion, religion and the basic motivation behind it are so beautiful and historical and emotional for every kind of faith. I’m also interested in the idea that religion is both individual and communal. I think that every individual has their own unique relationship with their faith, but I think it’s amazing that despite this, a group of people can come together and share in the joy and community that comes with that faith.”

Walsh pointed out that in western culture religion is often generalized. “When we say ‘religion’ we think of a set of texts and institutions and practices and beliefs, and we tend to think of the monotheistic traditions: Christianity, Islam.” For Carroll the specification of religious study is particularly intriguing. “I’m planning on having a concentration in religion because I honestly really enjoy learning about it. I want to become more familiar with the numerous belief systems that exist in the modern world, as well as learning about their origins and the people that follow those systems.” She added, “I’m also interested in how what people believe impacts their daily lives and contributions to society.”

At Vassar, religion is taught from many perspectives. Carroll said, “The religion class I’m currently taking is titled ‘Imagining China,’ and we are exploring the roots of Chinese culture especially as it has grown out of the various belief systems in Chinese history.”

Mishra’s lecture will hopefully unpack the complexities of talking about religion. Walsh said. “I think back in the ’70s and ’80s, a lot of sociologists predicted the decline of religion: that, as we became more scientific, as we became more knowledgeable about the universe, religion would decline.” As it turned out, Walsh explained, the inverse has occurred. “We’ve actually seen the opposite. How do we explain this? No matter how much science you throw at it, no matter how much rational thinking, how modern we are, religiosity still keeps increasing. So it’s got something to do with human identity that is very complicated.”

New biology exhibit provokes both suspicion and hope SPARK continued from page 1

before 1930. The oldest piece is a serpentine horn, found in the “treasure room” in Skinner Hall, that he estimated could be as much as 500 years old.

The space is full of pieces, but not cluttered. Upon entering the gallery, you are greeted by a nearly life-size mannequin that displays the anatomy of the human body, a piece that Jones said was one of his first inspirations for the show. On the back wall, spaced out evenly across the exhibit are several “moon prints.” These black-and-white posters, which the curator also considers essential to the exhibit, show detailed photographs of moon’s surface and were once used as teaching devices.

One of the most eye-catching items in the show is the “Chart of Electromagnetic Radiations.” Covering almost an entire section of the show, the piece details the different forms of radiations in order of wavelengths through odd and fascinating comics, illustrated with a retro aesthetic and garish colors.

Not everything in the exhibit is old though; at the gallery, contemporary research is shown to have a streak of modern art. Jones said that what he tried to convey in the exhibit is the way in which the scientist and artist both learn a skill, which they can use to express their curiosity or intuition. He wanted to capture the interface of the scientist, the craft of research and its methods and the resulting product.

One such piece on display was the Winogradsky Column from the lab of Associate Professor of Biology David J. Esteban in the biology department. The display is made up of an ever-changing colony of bacteria, cyanobacteria and algae, which creates patterns and shapes in complex shades of red, brown, gray and green. A lamp shines directly on the incubating community, powering the growth and movement of the piece, which is watched by a time-lapse camera whose photos will be used for both science and art.

Another such item is Assistant Professor of Biology Meghan Gall’s research on cow-

birds, a creature that lays its eggs in other bird’s nests, tricking these birds to raise their offspring. The exhibit displays glass slides of the birds collected from the Biology, Chemistry, Earth Science, Geography, Physics and Art History departments. Complimenting the slides are recordings of bird calls and an example of a trap that is used in the research.

Next to each display is a plaque with dialogue that illuminates each researcher’s story of how they became interested in their topic. Jones used the dialogues to add depth and nuance to the viewer’s understanding of the art. Each story tries to illuminate how creative thinking, non-scientific inspirations, dreaming, tool-creation, arts, literature and music have had their influences on each researcher’s work.

The aesthetic beauty of the items on display at the show in many ways mirrors the

beauty of the building they celebrate. The incredible union of form and function in the chemistry devices on display is just as impressive as the curving glass windows and walls of the Bridge Building. Jones hopes that his show and the new building can work together to “lessen the divide between arts and sciences,” both ideologically and in practice on this campus.

In the coming months, the old Mudd chemistry building, not much loved by this campus, will come down, marking a new era for the sciences at Vassar. However, you need not look much further than the Palmer gallery this week to see that, while renewing its commitment to research, the College is still a place for the liberal arts to thrive. Jones has done well to show that the line between the disciplines is drawn largely by the ground between each department’s building.

Sam Pianello/The Miscellany News

job-friendly subjects.” The article noted, “Most of the top earners in the liberal arts end up matching only the bottom earners in science, technology, engineering and mathematics.” These numbers are derived from across all colleges in the United States, and not from highly selective private liberal arts institutions like Vassar, yet all the same, the statistic speaks volumes about the college’s recent change of direction towards science.

While the liberal arts are no doubt alive and well here at Vassar, these trends are not beyond the sphere of the students. Right next to the Retreat, the new “Spark! A Feel for Science Exhibit” is appearing in the Palmer Gallery, replacing the traditional arts exhibitions on display in the space. The exhibit, which is the latest in a series celebrating the new Bridge for Laboratory Sciences, might be emblematic of the response to these data-based criticisms of the financial utility of a liberal arts curriculum.

When I asked one such senior about the exhibit, he said, “It’s a sign of the times that they are using an art space for a science exhibit.”

The curator of the exhibit, Richard Jones, a member of the Earth Sciences Department and a director of the A. Scott Warthin Museum of Geology and Natural History, would have to disagree. In response to these comments, he laughed. For Jones, the concern for this apparent loss of artistic space did not have grounds: “To say the show is only science in an art space would be like saying Andy Warhol shouldn’t use packaging in his artwork.”

While there are no Warhols in the Palmer Gallery this month, the pieces on display in the Palmer Gallery are certainly worth the visit. The gallery is largely artifacts recovered from the buildings that have recently been renovated on campus. Jones credited science’s rich physical culture for the multitude of interesting items he was able to recover, which come almost entirely from

A skinless model of a human body stands in the Palmer art gallery for the new “Spark!” exhibit.

Sponsored by the Biology Department, the exhibit features “moon prints” behind on the back wall.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

March 3, 2016

FEATURES

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Underground pub night calls for student Einsteins TRIVIA continued from page 1

On Friday nights, people most commonly go out with friends to watch a football game, or maybe a basketball one, but there’s also field hockey, lacrosse, baseball, soccer, volleyball and softball. For the most part, however, Quiz Bowl tournaments rarely tend to come to mind first, or even at all.

To Quiz Bowl Club Treasurer Collin KnoppSchwyn ’16, this lack of recognition is hardly unusual. Describing Quiz Bowl, Knopp-Schwyn said, “It’s frankly a more boring version of ‘Jeopardy.’” Knopp-Schwyn understands the lack of cognizance on campus about the existence of this organization. It’s an acquired taste, he understands. After all, his own exposure to the event and activity really came as a result of his association to his roommate freshman year, and Crossword Editor York Chen ’16.

For Chen however, the idea and existence of

Quiz Bowl isn’t to be taken so lightly. Founder and main recruiter for its members, Chen decided to extend his experience of Quiz Bowl in high school into college. This began his endeavor and success in creating and instituting Quiz Bowl as a touring organization three years ago.

Despite only existing for three years, the club has gone to, competed at and been relatively successful in various Quiz Bowl tournaments on the East Coast.

As fun as both the tournaments and practices were, program director and member Molly James ’17 still recognized a significant gap between prospective club members’ perceptions of the event as a trivia-oriented activity and its actual manifestation. Fellow club member and organization Quizmaster Alycia Beattie ’16 identified the same type of inaccessibility between people looking to answer trivia while having fun and the type of competition Quiz

courtesy of Vassar College

Matthew’s Mug, shown above, will be home to the little known Quiz Bowl club’s new Pub Trivia Night. The team will be providing pub-style eats in the hopes of a high student turn-out.

Bowl really is.

In her words, Beattie described how her introduction to Quiz Bowl impacted her eventual role as Quizmaster: “I remember going with York to Yale, that was really the first time I had witnessed a Quiz Bowl competition. In high school I was engaged in Whiz Quiz, which I guess is a similar quiz or trivia event that I was a part of, but in terms of collegiate-level trivia competition I wasn’t really prepared or expected what I saw. At the tournament, there was a lot of frustration for teams coming up with the wrong answer and people take it so seriously that it was really clear to me that competition and the act of emerging victorious were and still are very important for Quiz Bowl teams.”

The competition and elevation of the type of questions and answers that are expected in Quiz Bowl tournaments has, Beattie acknowledges, been one of the major turnoffs for prospective members. Especially in her experience as the Quizmaster, or the individual who reads each question and ensures that participants are following the stricter regulations of question response, Beattie admits that ostensibly there are problems with Quiz Bowl as an event in how it comes across in first impressions.

James and Beattie have both seen firsthand how the semantics and intensity of the questioning can really intimidate inexperienced players. Beattie elaborates, “A lot of the time, the answer to a question will be really simple and terms or concepts like water or ceramic, etc. What’s really counter-intuitive, though, is the projection of the clue itself. A lot of them are highly complex and are sometimes phrased in presumptuous language that just seems so esoteric that I see a lot of students who come to a meeting once and just never come back.”

James agrees completely with Beattie’s analysis of this issue; for her, however, the solution manifested as an amalgamation between Knopp-Schwyn’s previous experiences and engagement with a more informal form of testing people’s knowledge of interesting information: pub trivia: “Last year I realized that Quiz Bowl needed to do more outreach on campus, but

a Quiz Bowl tournament did not seem like it would draw participation. Obviously, this was still a highly pertinent issue for our organization, so I went to the drawing board and came up with trivia; the main difference was that this type of trivia would not be Jeopardy-style, but rather more pub!”

And it was with that, Pub Trivia Night was born, executed and attended with resounding success. Knopp-Schwyn recalls the immense turnout they received last spring semester when the inaugural edition of the event was held in the Mug: “We didn’t really expect a lot of people to come. We were so wrong though; there were actually so many people that showed up and wanted to compete that we actually ended up having to turn people away.”

Chen and Beattie both shared a sentiment of shock, though in retrospect; each understood the very difference in nature and formality of pub trivia and quiz bowl questions had to be the distinctive difference between organization and event turnout. Though both quiz bowl practices and the Pub Trivia Night questions originated from identically sourced and sotermed packets of approved questions, the addition of informality in a setting of friendships and bar food both heavily impacted the success and attendance of the night.

Despite the organization executive board’s trepidation, because of the unquestionable success of the night, it was clear that the fundamental notions of a successful Pub Trivia Night had been established. Even the single remaining impediment for a perfectly executed night, an excess of willing participants, was hardly an undesired consequence of the event. For Chen, Knopp-Schwyn, Beattie and James, a continuation of such a successful event was, in exact opposition to the types of questions posed at Pub Trivia Night, a no-brainer. As difficult as it appeared to be initially, in the face of supposedly non-disjunctive concepts, Quiz Bowl as an organization and event metamorphosed into something much more accessible and encompassing with Pub Trivia Night, an act that, fortunately, was not lost in (answer:) translation.

Moose, mousse, or meese: it’s simpler than it may seem Rafaela Vega del Castillo & Sarah Evans Guest Reporters

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MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

courrtesy of the writers

he mere thought of midterms often makes us want to eat our feelings. Or maybe eat ourselves into a well-deserved food coma.

Don’t get us wrong, we’ve also found ourselves, spoon in hand, eating way too many servings out of the peanut butter jar than is socially acceptable while trying to write that paper that was due yesterday. Trust us, we have all been in that situation many a stressed weekday.

When it’s Wednesday night and you’re furiously scraping those last precious bits out of the Skippy jar, and you’ve stuffed way too much peanut butter down your gullet to even be aware of your surroundings, it can be tough to consider adding something new to that list of desserts you crave during crunch time.

Once again, we’ve all been there.

But, why eat peanut butter when you can eat a dessert just as easy, and infinitely more satisfying? You don’t even have to sacrifice those pretenses of being committed to your own health and wellness you’ve been holding onto to indulge in this decadence. We have found a salubrious solution to all our midnight cravings and we want to share it with you!

This Chia Chocolate Mousse is a better alternative to your run-of-the-mill chocolate bar. Why, you may be asking? How could I have been living this way all this time, you may be asking as well?

Well, this dish works at all hours of the day, from the moment you wake up in the morning to the moment you pass out with your face in your organic chemistry textbook like last night.

Serve this little tidbit with a hearty scoop of bran or granola in the morning as a delicious, nutritious complement to your breakfast, dig into it unadorned during those few precious moments you have between classes or, perhaps most satisfyingly and necessary of all, dive into it as a homemade midnight snack when you’re hours into cramming for a test with no clear end in sight.

Better yet, this recipe is even easy to make in your dorm room, since there’s no need for baking and no complicated preparatory process to slow you down. So when you lock yourself away in your room for several days at a time to study for exams and your friends and family are distraughtly certain that you’ve gone missing, at least you won’t have to worry about that dessert fix that’s keeping you from murdering your housemates!

This recipe is packed with tons of omega-3, plenty of healthy fats and heaps of potassium, so we wouldn’t judge you for eating the whole jar (even if we hadn’t just done so ourselves).

Since it is vegan and gluten-free, you can also share this dessert with practically anyone, regardless of dietary preference!

Late night, the desert can be paired with a number of full-bodied red wines or coffee. A merlot with hints of citrus would likely be an excellent addition to this bitter-sweet concoction of almonds, banana and vanilla. For the early hours, combine this recipe with a coffee-shake to boost your energy and kick-start your metabolism.

As people who don’t eat dairy or gluten, we have often found the dessert offerings at the Deece to be desperately limited. Under such conditions we had no choice but to take matters into our own hands, to forge our own creative culinary path. After what felt like eons of brainstorming, we landed on the idea for a rather out-of-the-ordinary mousse.

It was difficult to believe, at first, that avocado could possibly be a good ingredient for a proper sweet treat. Little did we know, however, that it would quickly and decisively prove us wrong, packing a subtle but unforgettable flavor that would forever change our original ideas of what makes for a memorable dessert.

Needless to say, it now remains an essential ingredient of a dessert that we can’t seem to get enough of.

Follow in our footsteps by taking and try this healthy but indulgent Chia Chocolate Mousse!

Ingredients 1 • frozen banana 1/2 • avocado 1 tbsp • cocoa powder 1 1/2 - 2 tbsp • peanut butter (or nut butter of your choice) 2/3 cup • almond milk (or milk of your choice) 1-2 tbsp • chia seeds 2 packets • stevia add ... 1 tsp mint, vanilla or almond extract

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March 3, 2016

Seniors focus in on picture-perfect screenplay theses Julia Cunningham

Assistant Features Editor

S

courtesy of Joseph Muszynski

eniors are nearing that time: their last last week before spring break (their last) which will shortly be followed by their last first day back after their last spring break. Among all these lasts are a few firsts: their first grad school acceptance, their first decisions not revolving around whether to go to the Deece or somewhere else, their first senior thesis. For the four seniors working on the screenplay thesis, next semester will bring their first semester free of the grueling work they have been putting in all of this semester with help from Adjunct Instructor in Film Joseph Muszynski.

Throughout the semester, senior Film majors who are completing theses in Screenwriting have been constructing their screenplays individually, with input from each other. Film major Samantha Smith ’16 described the process, saying, “We all write our own scripts but meet every other week to workshop each other’s scripts, give each other feedback and help answer any questions any writer may have. It’s pretty separate but it’s nice to all get together and help each other write the best scripts we can. I’ve found that feedback is incredibly important in screenwriting.”

Muszynski explained the structure of the thesis, saying, “A screenwriting thesis is structured similarly to an independent study; however the workload is more intensive. By the end of the semester, the student is expected to complete a 90-120 page screenplay, plus a critical introduction to their project, which serves as a theoretical companion to their work. They also must write a ‘treatment’ (synopsis) of their screenplay.”

Reflecting on her screenwriting process, Lindsay Lucido ’16 said, “For the screenplay thesis we need to write a feature-length script. We must also write a treatment (which is basically a summary of what happens) and a critical introduction, which talks more about the importance of the topic and incorporates any reading you’ve done on the topic.”

That topic is a historical fiction of each student’s choosing. Muszynski explained that while he is there to help, the students do the bulk of the

Students work together in a seminar to workshop, plan and organize their scripts for their rapidly approaching deadline. For many seniors, the weeks after break mark the final draft deadline. work, “Students who work toward a screenwriting thesis have already demonstrated the fundamentals of screenwriting, and therefore my role is that of a creative mentor or guide. I may help the student to generate ideas for their story, but the story is theirs.” Smith explained, “Our thesis advisor asked if we were interested in doing any historical fiction work and for me, my favorite moment in history has to be when Eartha Kitt, James Dean and Paul Newman had a threesome at a dance studio,” Smith explained.

She went on, explaining why her interest in the topic: “One, because no one knows it happened, I’m always asked if I made it up, and two, because what a good, classic Hollywood story. Now I get the chance to tell it and it’s been a lot of fun.”

Taylor Nunley ’16 explained that her own thesis has more personal roots. “My screenplay is about Susan ‘Susie’ King Taylor, the first Black Army nurse during the Civil War,” she said. She added,

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“I come from a family of Black nurses, which is what attracted me to Susie’s story. Despite this, I was very nervous about the prospect of conducting extensive research on her and writing a film about her all in the course of one semester.”

As the thesis advisor, Muszynski explained how he helps students’ processes. “In ways, my role is similar to that of a creative producer: I am there to facilitate the creative process. This means that I sometimes serve as a sounding board for the student to brainstorm and talk through their ideas; but I also provide the student with films, literature and other screenplays to study in order to inform their own project,” he said.

He went on to add that constructive criticism is another way he assists students. “Additionally, I act as a story editor, and I help to identify challenges or problems in their screenplay. These issues may be structural, theoretical or dialogic in nature, for example. Like the student who under-

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takes a thesis in screenwriting, I also must wear many hats!”

Nunley spoke to Muszynski’s role in her thesis topic saying, “I was much more inclined to write on one of the fictional topics I suggested. At the end of the day, though, Professor Muszynski convinced me that this idea was the most potentially marketable and I reminded myself of how important it is to tell the stories that aren’t being told.”

Nunley still has a lot of work to get through before next semester. “Our first full drafts are due in the middle of April and the final ones are due in May. It’s a one-semester thesis which can feel stressful at times but we have deadlines set up each week that helps keep us on track.”

While the thesis does not officially begin until the spring semester, the students have already been hard at work since the fall. Nunley said, “Professor Muszynski required us to come up with roughly eight ideas for a screenplay over winter break. He gave us feedback on them and worked with us to choose the ones we would actually work on.” In addition, she said, “I’m trying to write a little bit every day, an admittedly slower process than usual since I have to constantly do research before producing any content. But as long as I produce roughly 10 pages per week, I’ll be fine.” Smith has a similar approach. “I’m currently looking to complete two scripts this semester so my current script about the threesome should have a complete first draft by spring break,” she said.

There is already plenty of excitement before their last first day on campus after their last spring break for these seniors working on the film thesis. Some have high hopes for where they can go with their screenplay. Nunley said, “There will never be a shortage of superhero films, for example. But the story of a young Black woman excelling in what is remembered as an older white man’s world is sadly in short supply.” Muszynski added, “There is a tremendous amount of demand for content in the world. We would love to see more and more Vassar students become prominent storytellers in our shared cultural space.”

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March 3, 2016

OPINIONS

Page 9

The Miscellany News Staff Editorial

SSN needs reevaluation, provide more info to campus T

he Student Support Network (SSN), Vassar College’s behavioral monitoring system, is designed to critically respond to students the school deems concerning or in need of help. The SSN focuses its attentions on the behaviors of students on campus who appear to be at risk to themselves or others, whose academic situation is dire, who are experiencing significant personal problems, or whose behavior is alarming other members of the college community.

Overseen by the Dean of Students, D.B. Brown, the group is comprised at its core by administrators including the Dean of Studies, Director of ResLife and Director of Counseling Services, although other administrators may join on as deemed appropriate.

The SSN may first encounter a student if their behavior is egregious. Generally, students that interact with the SSN are failing multiple courses or have gone to the hospital several times due to drug or alcohol use. After receiving a tip from the SSN, the Dean of Students may initiate an evaluation process upon which the student will receive notice of their behavioral assessment.

After the evaluation is completed, the SSN may allow students to stay on campus, with or without conditional counseling or other services or, at most severe, ask students to leave campus. The Administration makes it clear that the decision to send students home and, more generally, the support network, are not meant to be punitive.

We at the Miscellany News believe the Administration misconceives the problem.

Despite the assertion that involuntary leaves are not a punishment, many students still perceive the process as a harshly negative consequence. The real issue is that the Student

Support Network’s (SSN) evaluation of the student’s condition is flawed and, as a result, the choice to send students home is made too often and largely does more harm than good to the student in question.

In the current system of evaluating and resolving students problems, the incumbent Dean of Students is the sole decision-maker.

After an evaluation of the student performed by either the Counseling Center or a third party that the student chooses, Brown decides how to best support the student. If he feels that the College is unable to accommodate the needs of the student, they may be sent home.

The Counseling Center may suggest solutions, but ultimately Brown alone holds control over students’ futures. How can one person have the power to determine one individual’s educational prospects? We at the Miscellany News are frustrated by the Dean of Student’s structural power and singular control of the involuntary leave decision.

Two years ago the Miscellany News explored similar questions. How does the SSN work? How are the results of evaluations used to determine whether or not students should be sent home? How often do students get sent home? Why is there a seeming lack of transparency on these issues? What is the Counseling Center’s process of evaluating someone?

Why isn’t there a set standard for the amount of notice students receive regarding their need to move?

At a college with such a high endowment, there should be many solutions to the real obstacles students encounter in their academic and social lives. Yet the fact that involuntary leaves exist as a solution in any notable number suggests that the College has not thought critically enough about how to best offer re-

sources to students in need. Taking a semester off is the last thing that many students want, and in many cases, student voices are not represented. Being sent home can also be extremely detrimental to a student’s well-being.

From a mental health standpoint, the decision to send students home can be dangerous to their health. There may be external factors, like a toxic home environment, that make a break from Vassar a less-than-comforting proposal. Whereas students at Vassar have access to Metcalf and various support systems when they need help, they may not have those back at home.

This problem is amplified for students who are on financial aid, and low-income students in general, who are unable to access resources at home because of the cost. But concerns about the world outside of Vassar also directs our attention to the possible inadequacies of Vassar itself. Why is it that we still see students being dispelled from campus at the same time that Metcalf has been growing in staff?

If the College is expanding in an effort to better respond to the needs of its residents and students, why do they still opt to send away anyone who might present more complex challenges for them? From a student’s perspective, the decision to send students home due to mental health issues appears to be based on liability purposes first and student needs second, rather than trying to help students to recover from mental health issues.

We suggest a new paradigm for the process by which students are evaluated and possibly sent home, one that focuses on educating people on how the SSN works. It should be possible to find out how the SSN works without having to set up a meeting with the Dean of

Job benefits of humanities overlooked by government Nick Barone

Assistant Opinions Editor

O

ver the last several years, STEM education has entered the forefront of public discourse regarding institutional spending and state finances. Last week, The New York Times published an article detailing the rising trends of promoting STEM education and cutting funding for liberal arts education.

To anyone affiliated with an educational institution, this is not news. However, recent rhetoric surrounding the status of the humanities within our cultural lexicon has proved to be more incendiary and vitriolic than in the past.

In the fourth GOP debate, Florida Senator Marco Rubio asserted, “Welders make more than philosophers,” in an effort to promote vocational education while simultaneously undercutting the liberal arts. Kentucky Governor Matt Bevin’s suggested last month that students majoring in French literature should not receive any government assistance in terms of funding.

“There will be more incentives to electrical engineers than French literature majors, there just will,” Governor Bevin said after announcing his educational spending plan. “All the people in the world who want to study French literature can do so; they’re just not going to be subsidized by the taxpayers like engineers will be, for example.” Bevin majored in Japanese and East Asian Studies at Washington and Lee University.

Government policy both fuels and serves as a byproduct of this rhetoric. “When it comes to dividing the pot of money devoted to higher education, at least 15 states offer some type of bonus or premium for certain high-demand degrees, according to the National Conference of State Legislatures,” the Times article details (The New York Times, “A Rising Call to Promote STEM Education and Cut Liberal Arts Funding,” 02.21.2016). Justifications for these spending measures often involves politicians asserting that STEM majors yield higher salaries and therefore give back more to society and the economy than those who choose to study the humanities. It’s rhetoric we’ve all seen before.

The veracity of these claims are contentious at best. The value of a liberal arts education transcends the typical argument of “expanding your horizons” and self improvement. According to the Senior Vice President of the Association of American Colleges and Universities, Debra Humphreys, “Research by the association shows that employers are not as focused on individual majors as they are on the kind of broad-based analytic, communications and problem-solving skills that a humanities education specializes in.”

While comparatively lower than their STEM counterparts, salaries for humanities students have steadily increased over the last year and are projected to grow.

Though the attack on humanities education is certainly not a new concept, such egregious assaults on the liberal arts from both sides of the aisle have increased in a manner unseen before.

The value of a liberal arts degree proves to be a controversial issue in the national discussion of state and federal education funding.

The affordability and returns on investment of higher education are certainly valid concerns for government entities, especially when considering that this often disproportionately impacts lower-income individuals. However, upholding STEM education–which is certainly a crucial component of societal improvement and economic stimulus–while also disparaging and financially gutting the humanities is not the solution.

Access to higher education was and is as much a byproduct of government policy as it is of the economic well-being of the nation.

Subsequently, the rising costs of college tuition nationwide that account for rising student debt and financial burdens are as much a result of declining governmental support for public educational institutions as the economy. Focus for politicians should return to aiding public institutions in a way that aims at making college tuition affordable, lowering debt and borrowing rates, expanding federal student loan programs and granting scholarships to low-income and minority students.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Students.

Among the possible avenues for educating students, ResLife–including House Teams and particularly Student Fellows–should be an important part of the process. Student Fellows have been advised to report students to the SSN, as explained by Brown, if they “are worried about the well-being, or behavior, of another student.” (The Miscellany News, “SOCT to address student concerns,” 11.13.13).

Student Fellows are expected to report students who show concerning signs, but without understanding the system, they cannot know for sure what comes after their initial report.

Without this knowledge, how can Student Fellows and other figures on House Team do what is best for the students they are there to help? How they can continue to provide support to a student in need if they don’t fully understand the administrative process the student is going through?

All students should be informed of these processes. Those reporting students should know how the process works in addition to the possible outcomes. Starting at freshman orientation, administrators could easily teach students the processes behind the SSN with little required effort. The information should also be placed on the Dean of Students’ website.

We at the Miscellany News support the purpose of the SSN, but feel that the execution and understanding of the student body is lacking. Among other things, we believe that transparency is crucial to the functionality of the SSN. Understanding how and why students are sent away is critical for the health and happiness of the campus at large.

—The Staff Editorial represents the opinions of at least 2/3 of our Editorial Board.

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OPINIONS

Page 10

March 3, 2016

Art history department should bridge sociocultural gap Emma Jones

Assistant Opinions Editor

I

walked into the spacious auditorium that accommodates Vassar’s widely acclaimed Art 105/106 course on the first day with high hopes. The introductory level class serves as a foundation for Vassar’s Art History program, and I had heard nothing but rave reviews from students and faculty alike. As both a photographer and a lover of art museums, I had no reservations about taking an art class that would, according to several sources, “change my life.”

In countless ways, the course has lived up to the hype. On some fronts, however, it has merely left me frustrated and dissatisfied.

The time commitment alone is a deterrent for many students. The course consists of three lectures and one discussion section per week.

It is not the extra 50-minute session that discourages non-art history majors from taking the class, however, but the fact that it is a yearlong course.

I was particularly taken aback by the department’s unflagging commitment to tradition.

The lack of race and gender diversity that has plagued the art history world for centuries is no less prevalent at Vassar, despite its generally progressive stance on history and culture. It came as a surprise to me that at an institution where the discussion of discrimination and oppression is not only accepted, but expected, art continues to be so narrowly defined.

The future of Vassar’s Art History Department is currently up in the air as faculty members take potential changes and developments into consideration. The course’s two-semester requirement, an established tradition of the department’s introductory course, is now open to debate.

In a society of rapidly changing cultural and artistic norms, it is high time that the modern world rewrite art history. We need to reconsider not only the traditionally rigid structure that the history of art typically exists in, but its content as well.

Art history curriculums throughout the United States have long been dominated by cisgender, white males. The discipline of art history as it exists today was established by

Western, male academics, and the nature of the field has hardly changed since its creation. Our society needs to turn its attention to opening up the art world to people of all races, genders and backgrounds.

Reworking museums is a slow and painstaking process. Therefore, it is up to art history departments—both professors and students— to redefine the past and carefully consider the future of art. Whereas supplementing and recreating museum collections and curating more inclusive exhibitions may take decades, images in textbooks and online publications are easily interchangeable. Museums, galleries and the art market will not change until those who inhabit these spaces do.

Changing the ways in which art is analyzed and displayed, however, requires a fundamental understanding of the foundations of art. At the college level, it is undeniably important to have basic background knowledge of art history before moving on to higher levels and more specialized courses. However, it is equally important to represent a broad scope of perspectives and backgrounds. Modifying the requirements to make either Art 105 or Art 106 mandatory would increase the number of students able and willing to experience what Vassar’s Art History Department has to offer. Alternatively, if the department is not prepared to recreate the nature of the course entirely, they could choose to waive the two-semester requirement for upperclassmen or seniors only.

The time commitment that goes along with taking Art 105/106 greatly limits the ability and likelihood of non-art history majors to take the course. Allowing seniors to enroll in 200-level art history courses without the background of Art 105 or Art 106 would benefit both individual students and the department as a whole. It would not only ensure that a greater proportion of the student body would expose themselves to art, but would allow the department to benefit from a larger range of approaches and opinions that Vassar students of every major have to offer.

The tradition of Art 105/106 holds immense sentimental value for many Vassar alumnae/i, both those with and without art history de-

grees. Its syllabus has been tweaked over the years, of course, but the basic nature of the course has remained more or less intact since its conception.

Although the course supplements purely visual interpretations of works with basic background information, it tends to focus mainly on the importance of each painting, sculpture and building in terms of the broadly accepted notion of the artistic canon. The class does not often touch upon the connection between art and the sciences, language, music and other facets of culture.

The art world frequently isolates itself from the “real world” in this way, further restricting its accessibility and limiting visual literacy. Art provides lessons and skills that are applicable in all facets of the humanities and sciences and, in a greater sense, contributes to society’s general understanding of the world and its cultures.

Some groups have sought to change the cultural, racial and gender imbalance in the realm of art history. Guerrilla Girls, an anonymous group of women, has been creating posters and flyers since the 1980s that critique the art world’s narrow-mindedness. Group members typically wear gorilla masks and assume the identities of dead female artists while taking part in and organizing protests, campaigns and demonstrations. They argue that the acceptance of “mainstream” limits the category of art to “a bunch of white male masterpieces and movements” (“The Guerrilla Girls’ Bedside Companion to the History of Western Art,” 1998).

There are numerous other feminist art movements besides the Guerrilla Girls. The often deviant interpretation of art that these groups project on the traditional sphere of art history, however, has yet to be accepted into the mainstream art world.

The role of women and people of color in painting, in particular, throughout history, has been to reinforce the hierarchy of white supremacy. Modern bias, whether intentional or not, retroactively erases crucial chapters of history.

Of course, the internal prejudice of the art

world does not exist in a vacuum. In fact, quite the opposite is true: art reflects that which characterizes the world we live in day today.

According to a recently conducted survey, curators occupy “the whitest” profession in the arts: roughly 79 percent of curators in New York City are white (Diversity in the New York City Department of Cultural Affairs, 01.28.16).

The racial imbalance is unlikely to change until prominent galleries open themselves up to a greater diversity of artists. At the same time, it is improbable that the galleries themselves will evolve until the curators themselves do. This catch-22 is not easily resolved; it is up to colleges and universities to shape a new generation of burgeoning art historians and curators that is more open to change.

When curators and gallerists are confronted with the unfortunate truth that most of the artists whose work they accept are white and male, they often respond by arguing that the selection process is based solely on quality.

Far from justifying the racial and gender imbalance, however, this explanation reveals the deeply-rooted underlying belief that an artist should be a certain type of person—that is to say, that certain races and genders inherently produce better art.

Although the discussion of diversity in the Art History Department is not exactly new at Vassar, it needs to be acted upon in a way that significantly expands the definition of art and rethinks its place in history.

The cycle of discrimination within the art world will never end if each generation internalizes the same narrow definition of art as the last. A well-rounded art history curriculum would not only give marginalized artists the attention they deserve, but also shed new light on currently canonized works by allowing them to be studied in their true historical context.

We have allowed a sexist, Eurocentric standard of beauty to subsist in our culture for too long, and the deconstruction of this ideal begins with the redefining of art. It is our responsibility to strive to tell an accurate historical narrative rather than the romanticized account of history that the art world has been perpetuating for centuries.

Letter to the Editor With her Feb. 17th contribution to the Miscellany News, President Hill has done the College a service. The decision whether the College ought to divest from fossil fuel companies rests with the Board of Trustees. By articulating, in the public arena, some of the arguments which are likely to weigh with the Board, President Hill has given the larger College community the opportunity to consider these arguments and debate them openly – and she has herself helped to model the sort of good-willed and respectful debate which a liberal education aims to make possible. And by her leadership in working to reduce the carbon footprint of the College, President Hill has made it clear that her argument with those who favor divestment is not about ends, but about appropriate means.

In the spirit of open debate that President Hill models, I want to address two of the several arguments against divestment that she offers. I think that the first of these misses an important aspect of the argument regarding “stranded assets” to which it aims to respond. President Hill argues that by constraining the options of Vassar’s investment managers, divestment would reduce expected endowment returns while increasing volatility and risk. She devotes a paragraph to what she takes to be an argument for the opposite conclusion, offered by proponents of divestment: Some supporters of divestment argue that the reduction in returns or increase in risk would be small, or even that continued investments in fossil fuel companies will in fact lower returns, in part because of stranded assets (reserves of fossil fuels that will have no value because of the implications of their use for the environment). If this is the case, there is no need to argue for divestment, since rational investment committees and advisors would do this on their own.

The argument regarding stranded assets, to which she refers, is the following. The most significant determinant of the expected earnings of a fossil fuel company, and hence of its stock price, is the company’s proven reserves and probable

reserves – the coal, oil, or gas in the ground that the company has a legal right to extract and that there is a high likelihood that it can extract profitably. A 2015 study by McGlade and Ekins in the journal Nature estimates that in order for the earth to have a 50% chance of avoiding average temperature rises of more than 2°C above pre-industrial levels – the point at which global warming becomes truly catastrophic – during the 21st century, no more than one quarter of existing reserves of fossil fuels can be extracted. In the 2015 Paris climate accord, governments agreed to “aim” to keep average global temperature rises to 1.5°C. So, if the world succeeds in heading off truly catastrophic warming, three quarters or more of the reserves on the basis of which fossil fuel companies are valued will have to stay in the ground, as “stranded” (unextractable) assets – and the valuation of those companies can be expected to decline, precipitously, as a result.

This is the risk that investors in fossil fuel companies face.

Does this mean that an investment in fossil fuel companies will necessarily lose money – and that, foreseeing this, “rational investment committees and advisors” would necessarily divest on their own, as President Hill suggests?

No – and the argument about stranded assets does not presuppose this. It is possible that world governments will fail to take the necessary policy steps to limit climate change, and that the assets on which fossil fuel companies’ valuations are based will not become stranded.

What the considerations regarding stranded assets make clear is that an investment in fossil fuel companies is a bet that this will be the case – a bet that world governments will fail to do what is necessary to prevent truly catastrophic climate change. If that bet is successful, investors will profit from our collective failure to stop catastrophic climate change. Conversely, if we succeed in stopping catastrophic climate change, assets will be stranded and investors in fossil fuel companies will lose (significant) money. (This is one reason why it is hard to envisage share-

holder activism materially changing the behavior of corporations whose primary business is fossil fuel extraction: this would be to ask a majority of shareholders to vote for the destruction of the value of their own shares.) The argument from stranded assets is an argument that either investors in fossil fuel companies will lose money or we face catastrophe.

A second argument against divestment is the following. The world’s pool of investable wealth is enormous, and very little of it is controlled by institutions that care where their returns come from. So, while it might make us feel better about ourselves not to profit from fossil fuel companies, divestment by institutions like Vassar will not change the activities of those companies. It will merely change who has a share of their profits. (The same argument, of course, would apply to investments in munitions companies doing business with Sudan during the genocide in Darfur, purchases of conflict diamonds from Liberia and Sierra Leone, and so on.) I take it that this argument is what lies behind President Hill’s assertion that “[d]ivestment will not change incentives to reduce… consumption and production” of fossil fuels.

There are limits to this argument, even in its own terms: the movement for divestment from fossil fuels has been the fastest-growing divestment movement in history, with institutions worth $3.4 trillion now committed to some form of divestment. And, as a 2013 study by the “Stranded Assets Programme” at Oxford University outlines, while the capital markets on which large, integrated oil and gas companies rely are large and liquid, coal companies rely on debt markets that are smaller and more fragmented, and so the prospect of raising the cost of capital for coal companies, and so making it harder for them to extract coal from the ground profitably, is very real.

Proponents of divestment should grant that in the case of oil and gas companies, the direct, financial impacts of divestment on companies’ costs are, indeed, likely to remain small. But di-

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

rect, financial impacts are not the only impacts.

Perhaps the most important of the indirect impacts of divestment is stigmatization. Divesting from fossil fuel companies is a way for institutions of higher learning, foundations, state pension funds and others to say, unequivocally: a fossil fuel business, today, is not just another business, like any other. It is a business that can succeed, financially, in the short or medium term – but only at the cost of catastrophic suffering for millions of people. That is what the argument regarding stranded assets shows. In order for the political conversation around greenhouse gas policies in American and elsewhere to change, this must become a mainstream view.

And in order for real, impactful policy changes, like a carbon tax, to make it through our political system, the political conversation must change.

A similar process of stigmatization was a necessary step on the way to regulations on cigarette companies: it was only after the public came to see the sale of cigarettes as not just another business, like any other that cigarette taxes and restrictions on marketing, long proposed by policy wonks, were able to make it through the political system.

How likely is divestment, by Vassar and other institutions, to have effects like this? What are the odds that, by divesting, we will forego investment returns and yet have no impact at all on the course the world takes? I don’t know. But arguments around divestment need to begin from the fact that climate change in not like other moral challenges we face, or have faced. What we do, collectively, in the next two or three decades will determine the course of life on earth for tens of thousands of years. With stakes like that, our responsibility is incalculable. The appropriate response is to do everything within our power to avert catastrophe – not just what is guaranteed to succeed.

-Jeff Seidman Assoc. Prof., Dept. of Philosophy

March 3, 2016

OPINIONS

SJP ignores nuances of BDS resolution Jesser Horowitz Columnist

O

ver the past month I have advocated, both in my capacity as a staff writer for The Miscellany News and as a member of the Vassar community, against the proposed BDS resolution and related amendment currently before the VSA council. In doing so I have put friendships, my reputation and any future serving in student government at risk. The divisiveness of this issue has already had a significant negative impact on the community at large because of its uncanny ability to lower the state of discourse. This will be my final call to reject BDS. Firstly, I would like to call upon everyone involved to refrain from the kind of ad hominem attacks that have plagued the debate thus far. Those in support of BDS especially need to realize that dismissing an argument as “racist” or “Zionist” does not close discussion. These terms have lost all meaning at this point. They’ve become buzzwords that are used because they appeal to certain groups of people to whom the Students for Justice in Palestine (SJP) want to appeal. I am a liberal Zionist who stands opposed to BDS. If you think that makes me a racist, then it speaks volumes more about you than it does about me.

Dismissing those who disagree with you as racist makes you no different than Republicans in the 1950s who labeled all liberals communists.

Secondly, I want to educate people on the meaning of Zionism. There are many on this campus who desperately need to be informed on what exactly a Zionist is. At its most basic form, a Zionist is someone who believes that, a) a Jewish state should exist and, b) it should exist in Israel. It does not preclude the possible existence of a Palestinian state in addition to an Israeli state.

Although not every Zionist is a Jew and not every Jew is a Zionist, Zionism is tied to Judaism.

When people condemn all of Zionism, they believe that they can separate it from the Jewish faith, but the fact is that for the majority of people, Zionism is tied to Judaism. I have previously cited this as a cause of the antisemitic incidents that

occurred at Vassar.

Thirdly, as I said in a previous article, the BDS movement will hurt Palestinians. On Monday, The Times of Israel reported that SodaStream has officially laid off all their Palestinian workers as a result of pressure from the BDS movement.

SJP and Jewish Voice for Peace (JVP) have yet to provide an adequate response to my last article that detailed the lack of Palestinian involvement in BDS or the economic impacts on Palestine.

Moreover, BDS will hurt the Jewish community. The movement has gone hand-in-hand with antisemitism throughout the country, especially at the UC schools. At the University of California at Santa Barbara, following anti-Israel protests, fliers blaming Jews for Sept. 11 were distributed on campus. At the University of California at Santa Cruz, a member of SJP shouted at a Jewish student wearing a yarmulke that “Hitler was right.”

At the University of California at Davis, in retaliation for its support for Israel, a swastika was drawn on the wall of a Jewish fraternity. At that same school, Jewish students who voted against divestment received hate mail and threats. At the University of California at Irvine, SJP members made signs that said, “Death to Zionists.” At the University of California at Berkeley, graffiti has been found saying that “Zionists should be sent to the gas chambers.”

Outside the UC schools, at Northwestern, an institution that passed BDS, there were antisemitic incidents, such as swastikas drawn on buildings on the campus. Similar incidents occurred at Northeastern, a school that also considered the BDS resolution (it ultimately did not pass there).

And the most ironic part of all of this is that the very reason Israel exists is provide a place for Jews to feel safe from the antisemitism that has become prominent at the colleges and universities that pass BDS. BDS does not make sense as policy. It will positively affect absolutely no one on campus while negatively affecting the entire Jewish community.

BDS does not make sense as a movement. It will positively affect no one in Palestine while

hurting the Palestinian economy.

So why should the Vassar Student Association be voting in favor or something doesn’t improve the lives of any of their constituents, won’t help the cause for peace and, if anything, will hurt the very people it’s trying to help?

SJP is known nationwide as a deeply antisemitic organization; their actions from the UC schools to Northeastern, where they were banned for, among other things, disrupting a Holocaust Remembrance Day event. And yet when the Northeastern chapter was banned, the Vassar chapter not only declined to condemn their actions but jumped to their defense, eventually getting them reinstated.

And SJP is the main advocate of BDS. So, based on their actions, why shouldn’t the Jewish community be afraid? Why shouldn’t I believe that if BDS passes, what happened at the UC schools and at Northeastern won’t happen here? How have any of the pro-Palestine groups on campus gone out of their way to condemn antisemitism from other pro-Palestinian activists? What action has SJP taken that should alleviate my concerns regarding the effect of BDS on the Jewish community? Why should I for even one second believe that at Vassar things will be different when so far they haven’t been?

The reason that Jewish parents are afraid to send their students to Vassar isn’t because they’re conservative, it’s because they’ve seen what effect movements like this have at similar college campuses throughout the country, and they’re afraid that something like that can happen at Vassar.

Frankly, so am I. If you believe that Palestine has been wronged and that it deserves a state, that’s perfectly fine. In fact, I’m inclined to agree with you. But BDS isn’t going to help Palestine, it’s not going to help the Vassar community and it’s going to have a lasting negative impact on Jews at this school. So when it goes to referendum, which I suspect it inevitably will, I urge everyone reading to please vote against it. And this Sunday, I urge every member of the VSA council to vote no.

Research reveals implications of clam cancer Steven Park Columnist

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f there is one word that strikes fear into people’s hearts and conveys a haunting image of sickness and death, it’s cancer. According to the Union for International Cancer Control (UICC) and the International Agency for Research on Cancer (IARC), the disease is a global epidemic that kills 7.6 million people every year, 4 million of whom are below the age of 69.

Even worse, experts predict that the death toll is projected to increase to 6 million lives per year by 2025. Scientists are continuing to pursue different fields of research that can shed new light on the nature of this deadly disease.

Recently, experts have come across a horrifying discovery: cancer may be contagious.

With every new insight bringing us closer to putting an end to cancer, this finding proves to be a terrifying yet valuable piece of information. This discovery originated in the 1970s when scientists were puzzled by the outbreak of leukemia in soft-shell clams along the east coast of North America. They found that this type of cancer could be spread to healthy clams by injecting them with the blood of cancer-stricken clams. For decades, researchers concluded that a virus was transmitting the cancer. It wasn’t until 2015 that a team of experts lead by Stephen Goff from Columbia University finally pinpointed the answer: the cancer itself was spreading to other clams (National Geographic, “Selfish Shellfish Cells Cause Contagious Clam Cancer,” 04.09.2015).

This meant that the clam leukemia originated from a single host and somehow gained the ability to survive and thrive in other hosts.

As the second leading cause of death in the U.S., a top cause worldwide, cancer was thought to have a single saving grace: its non-infectious nature. While a tumor may outwit all attempts to stop its growth in a patient, the cancer ultimately dies with its host, unable to infect another victim. However, the idea of cancer being transferred to new hosts is nothing new.

In 1964, researchers at the National Cancer Institute performed an experiment where they harvested cancer cells in hamsters and injected

them into healthy hamsters to encourage the cancer’s evolution (Harper’s Magazine, “Contagious Cancer,” 04.2008). After numerous cycles, the tumor developed into a “super tumor” that could spread from hamster to hamster, without a needle, through social contact (National Geographic). Regarding human cases, there have been a handful of documented cases where doctors, surgeons and laboratory workers accidentally pricked themselves with a surgical instrument infected with cancer cells and had tumors proliferate in the wounded area (Harper’s Magazine). In almost all these cases, the infected person had to undergo emergency surgery before the tumor grew out of control.

However, these examples were extremely rare, freak incidents caused by accidents and human tampering. Cancer isn’t known for spreading naturally. It may be triggered by a carcinogenic chemical, bacteria or a virus, but the actual cancer cells shouldn’t be able to move from host to host like a pathogen. Yet, with the discovery of the clam leukemia’s contagious nature, the number of known exceptions to this commonly-held belief has increased to three. The other two exceptions belong to dogs and Tasmanian devils, an aggressive species of marsupial found in Australia. For dogs, the tumor cells are physically transmitted during sexual contact where the tearing of genital tissues provide a bridge for the cancer (New York Times, “Scientists Ponder the Prospect of Contagious Cancer,” 02.22.2016). This condition, called Canine Transmissible Venereal Tumor (CTVT), originated 11,000 years ago from a single dog and has been circulating ever since. With Tasmanian devils, a cancer known as Devil facial tumor (DFT) disease has been spreading as they fight and bite each other’s faces (The Atlantic, “The Curious Case of a Contagious Cancer,” 01.07.2016). Having emerged from a single source, this contagious cancer has been completely ravaging the Tasmanian devil population and has ultimately put them on the endangered-species list.

What makes the clam leukemia worrying is that, unlike dogs or Tasmanian devils, this type of cancer is not spread through physical con-

tact. Instead, it’s speculated that the clams are drawing in floating cancer cells as they sieve food from the water (National Geographic). It may not be a quick or efficient way for cancer cells to transmit themselves to other hosts, but it’s bound to happen eventually. Goff and his team are already in search of other species that are affected by cancer spread in a similar manner. They have already found similar instances in other mollusks in European waters as well as a contagious cancer that affects cockles.

It is terrifying to imagine cancer evolving into a transmissible contagion, especially one that can get into our water supply and cause tumors through contaminated drinking water.

However, scientists have relieved fears, stating that no case of cancer naturally transferring to humans has been observed and that transmissible cancers still remain very rare. In addition, natural immunity in humans prevents human-to-human cancer transmissions. However, what’s worrying is that this scientific revelation is just one addition to a growing trend of cases on contagious cancer. In 2013, a man from Medellin, Colombia was diagnosed with cancer thanks to the spread of cancer cells from a cancer-ridden tapeworm inhabiting the man’s body (NYT). Last November, scientists studying DFT disease found a second type of contagious cancer in the Tasmanian devils, marking the discovery of two transmissible cancers within just 30 years (The Atlantic).

Whether or not cancer is truly contagious to humans, it’s important to keep track of the progress being made in this field of research.

Any development may cause huge shockwaves in the scientific community and prepare us for a grim future ahead. Even if cancer can’t be spread from person to person, researching how tumors are spread in animals can provide more insights on its mechanism and prevention.

Whichever direction this research takes, the scientific community should bring more focus on this issue and expand its efforts in finding answers. The idea of contagious cancer may be frightening, but more extensive study could ultimately yield new insights and perhaps even the eternally sought-after cure.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Page 11

Word on the street Whose face should be on the $200 bill?

“Meryl Streep.”

— Derek Bishop ’19

“Betty White.”

— Matt Knigge ’18

“Donald Drumpf.”

—Lucy Ellman ’19

“Ross Macklin, Vassar’s assistant soccer coach.”

— Jordan Palmer ’16

“Bernie Sanders.”

— Brian Haufler ’19

“Vermin Supreme, he’s the only candidate researching time travel.” ­­—Philip Macaluso ’19 Zander Bashaw, Humor & Satire Editor Evelyn Frick, Columnist Ashley Pecorelli, Photographer

HUMOR & SATIRE

Page 12

March 3, 2016

Breaking News From the desk of Zander Bashaw, Humor & Satire Editor Lonely student misunderstands purpose of Vassar single sign-on, uploads their Tinder pictures to Moodle profile Nation untouched by “Jeb!” Security writes up wily agent campaign’s drawn out death Bond Hill at 007 deadly sins Chris Allen

Campaign Coroner

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eb Bush’s presidential campaign died quietly in its sleep Saturday, Feb. 20, 2016. The campaign finally found peace after a long, hard fought battle with not getting enough votes. Jeb was surrounded by his loved ones at the time of his campaign’s death, all of whom were disappointed, but not surprised that he had failed at the family pastime of trying to be the most important guy in the United States. “He may have gotten fourth place in South Carolina, but little Jebby will always be number three in our hearts,” stated Jeb’s mom at the campaign funeral. Jeb’s campaign is survived by three children, four grandchildren and many other potential presidential candidates of the future in his extended family.

The “Jeb!” campaign was born in Miami last summer after several flirtatious months of “actively exploring” and “seriously considering” the idea of a candidacy. Because of that long gestation period, and the unholy amount of Super PAC money raised during, Jeb was initially considered by many to be the frontrunner for his party. Yet in this Wonka factory tour that we call the Republican presidential primaries, anything can happen.

These primaries began when 16 eager children who were fortunate and wealthy enough to raise plenty of golden tickets decided to enter this world of political fantasy. At first, good-natured, patient Jeb seemed to be the Charlie of the bunch. But alas, the hooting oompa loompa who is currently in first place has pushed yet another innocent soul into the chocolate river of defeat.

But was it that bloviating billionaire who caused the death of Jeb’s campaign, or was it Jeb himself? Some have questioned whether this soft-spoken, sensitive turtle ever really had what it took to make it all the way to the November ballot. In the post mortem, we can see why Jeb’s campaign suffered as much as it did.

He chose to run during a weird election cycle, where traditional qualifications for the Republican primaries, such as political experience and just generally not being an obnoxious asshole, led to disqualification.

Another burden upon Jeb’s campaign life was that unfortunate last name which he kept neatly tucked away in the letter B of “Jeb!” Because Jeb is an acronymic nickname with the B standing for Bush (his real name is John Ellis Bush), it

is technically a misnomer when people call him “Jeb Bush.” This misnomer is exactly like when people say “ATM machine.”

America, as it transpired, was not too psyched about another ruler from the Bush dynasty.

Let us not forget that big brother George once soared at a monarch-like 92 percent approval rating, but toward the end of his term he managed to achieve 19 percent, the lowest approval rating since approval ratings were invented.

Jeb will be remembered fondly for both his timidness and his courage. He made debates more exciting because you never knew what to expect from him. Would he let the other Republicans walk all over him, or would he have one of those nights where he takes some surprisingly strong swings?

In the twilight years of his campaign, as his poll numbers began to sink, he often resorted to the latter attitude. In a December debate he dropped that “you can’t insult your way to the presidency,” bomb on He-Who-Must-Not-BeNamed, with the tone of a fed up nerd who finally and heroically stands up to a class bully.

Meanwhile, the other nerds onstage, hoping to steal some of the bully’s voters, cautiously stood by as if the first-place dominance by a reality TV star and mail-order steak salesman was a normal part of a campaign race. Jeb decided to go after the “chaos candidate,” and it may have accelerated the unfortunate death of his campaign. But as Jeb’s family have always said, at least he tried.

Looking back on Jeb’s campaign, many other fond memories come to mind. How many other presidential candidates sold a $75 guacamole bowl, affectionately titled the “Guaca Bowle,” as campaign merchandise? Let us also never forget when Jeb, in the dying days of his campaign, tweeted that photo of his handgun with the caption “America.”

Perhaps the second most cherishable memory of the Jeb campaign’s time on this earth was a triumphant, epic speech that will be remembered alongside Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address.

Having roused the crowd with his powerful words of wisdom, Jeb solidified his place in presidential campaign history by imploring his audience, “please clap.”

A visitation for friends and family of the dearly departed campaign will take place next Wednesday in Jeb’s basement. In lieu of flowers, Jeb requests sympathy donations in the form of guacamole bowls. Please cry.

Evelyn Frick

Quantam of So-lust

F

RIGID SIN HOLE, N.Y.— As the festivities for the Jewett House Team event “Seven Deadly Sins” got underway on Friday night, party-goers may have noticed some weirdness during the night. And no, this is not in reference to the Mötley Crüe of assorted floor hosts. These strange happenings culminated last night at approximately 11:47 p.m., when campus security was called to remove an overly rowdy party guest, one Vassar College President Catharine Bond Hill.

Bond Hill, known as Cappy (for reasons that elude everyone on campus and yet is perpetuated as if “Cappy” is a real, normal nickname), was first noticed at the typically students-only event by the Jewett House Team elevator attendant. The student told The Miscellany News, “She got on the elevator with a bunch of freshman in such a violently casual way that I knew it was her immediately. It would be kind of like if Steve Buscemi walked into a kindergarten class and pretended to be one of the toddlers. He could put on a pretty convincing act but ultimately it’s just like, ‘Man, you’re Steve Buscemi.’” Pressed for more details, he continued, “So I asked her if she was Cappy and she gave me the stink eye, but it only further confirmed my suspicions. I’d know those glasses anywhere.”

Stepping out of the elevator, the first of Cappy’s misdeeds started on the ninth floor of Jewett: Pride. This floor was hosted by the 2019 Class Council and, with a focus on vanity, mirrors were used as decoration. Many witnesses stated that they saw Bond Hill first approach a mirror, stare into it and give herself a quick pep talk, saying something to the effect of, “If our administration can stay hidden among the peer institutions, I can blend in with these kids!”

In what was purported to be a show of Vassar Pride, Cappy proceeded to publicly chug multiple craft beers that she, despite her legality, had stowed away in the waistband of her pant suit.

Unlike Vassar’s financial aid, however, Hill was not need-blind towards the students. She offered students something to drink, telling them that, “real Brewers don’t drink piss.” After feeling sufficiently accomplished in bonding with students, Cappy made her way to the next floor.

President Hill then arrived at the Envy Floor, but her stay was short-lived. Upon inserting herself into another situation that was clearly

not meant for her age range, Cappy got into an altercation with a student. It started when a student allegedly yelled across the room that she is not as cool as Dean of Studies DB Brown. A witness stated, “Cappy removed her pearl earrings, asked someone to hold them for her and had to be held back from completely curb-stomping the guy, who, by the way, I’m 100 percent sure was DB Brown also pretending to be a student.” After yelling some fairly mild language at the offender, Cappy is reported to have shouted, “Don’t diss me on my home turf or you’ll get schooled, private-co-educational-liberal-arts style!” The Vassar College President then said she was “chill” and walked away.

Later, Cappy was seen on the Greed Floor where the Vastards were performing. This is where most students agree that Cappy committed her biggest misdeed; she requested that the Vastards perform “Gold Digger” by Kanye West. Vastards member Christa Haryanto told the Misc., “We refused. It was almost like she didn’t know about ‘The Life of Pablo’ at all.”

Cappy, still riding high on the adrenaline rush from her previous activities, subsequently took over the floor and told everyone that she would teach them the true meaning of greed.

For Bond Hill, this meant giving a long and extremely detailed presentation on Vassar’s endowment. Noticing that everyone seemed extremely bored, Cappy stormed off, allegedly whispering, “I thought it would be totally meta.

No one here understands me.”

The last floor Cappy visited before being intercepted by security was Lust. Unlike the other floors, however, Hill was prompted to leave not by her own actions, but due to someone else’s. Witnesses report that The Miscellany News’s own Humor and Satire Editor Zander Bashaw was seen chatting up the College President. When asked for comment, Zander said, “I can’t explain my actions, her toothy smile is so much more enchanting in person! But she said that the hook-up culture at Vassar is far too weak for her to dignify participating in.”

After this final incident, security officers finally caught up with Cappy and escorted her home. Inside sources report that President Catharine Hill will have to meet with a House Advisor later in the week to discuss her actions.

While declining to comment about her behavior last evening, Cappy did tell us, “Completely on the record, that Xavier kid should stay within his league. Or at least his own tax bracket.”

Tasty’s homologue lowers standards for collegiate demographic Sophie Blumenstock, virtual chef

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n collaboration with Buzzfeed, the producers of the increasingly popular “Tasty” videos (featured on Facebook) are working on a new project. The new series, wittily entitled “Nasty,” attempts to create new recipes and tutorials that acknowledge the limited culinary resources of the college student.

Leaving the nest and entering an environment comprised of people in their late teens and early twenties can be traumatic in many ways. However, the largest transition for many new college students is going from home-cooked meals to cafeteria food. Food, especially food of high quality or even just in large quantities, is seen as a commodity.

There is almost a feeling of scarcity present, with students flocking to campus events that promise slices of pizza or carefully hoarding food in sealed bins and small refrigerators.

People begin to push their own boundaries in what they will put into their mouths, cheerfully justifying consuming expired yogurt or applesauce. Even the E. coli scare at Chipotle was not enough to deter the appetites of the students. Apparently, “Everything is fine as long as you don’t eat the carnitas.”

The “Nasty” video project’s goal is to provide college students with quick and easy tutorials using ingredients readily available and relatively cheap. In this way, students can recreate a homey feel for themselves without breaking the bank. The videos also allow for limited access to kitchens as well as kitchen utensils, often only requiring a microwave or a toaster. Some of the upcoming videos include a lasagna made out of ramen noodles and spray cheese, Bacio’s leftover pizza roll poppers, buffalo chicken-flavored pinwheels

and a gummy candy fruit salad.

The Misc was granted a full-access, behind the scenes tour of the “Nasty” studio kitchen to see what all the hype was about. Unlike the cheerfully lit and colorful aesthetic that all avid viewers of the “Tasty” videos know and love, the “Nasty” kitchen seemed dingy, and maybe even a bit hazardous to the health. The only appliances were a defrosted refrigerator, a toaster and a microwave encrusted in splatters of food. The only utensils present were a small bowl, a mug and two forks. When asked about the rather sparse kitchen arrangement, and, furthermore, how the chefs planned to cook without any utensils, the producers explained that they used to have a fully stocked kitchen, but the appliances broke down and the utensils were all stolen. However, “You can do a lot with a fork and some tin foil. You

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

just have to get creative!”

Notes for this article end here, as the reporter noticed a roach the size of a small rodent crawling up the wall and fled screaming as the producers captured it and flushed it down the nearest toilet. It took two flushes.

Inspired from the trip to the studios, members of the Misc’s staff decided to attempt a few of the recipes featured in the “Nasty” videos. Someone had some leftover pizza, so the they gave the “pizza pinwheels” a spin.

40 minutes into the pizza pinwheels experience, which translates the first 0.2 seconds of the video, Ed board realized that if they had really wanted to do this, they would have gone to the Culinary Institute. At press time, the editors were found devouring stale vending machine Nildas while idly watching “Tasty” videos.

March 3, 2016

HUMOR & SATIRE

Page 13

Odysseus laments his nominal link to the Odyssey Online Zander Bashaw Poseidenier

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“Gone Bowling” ACROSS

1 Chapati, or unleavened Indian flat* 5 * unit 9 Toroid * 14 It can be spun 15 Deets 16 Acclimate (alt. spelling) 17 Northeast waterway 18 1/760 of an atm 19 What you may ravenously do to * 20 Kind 22 Shrek, or York 24 Cries of protest 25 Fratty garb 28 Mudd, for one, amirite??! (we don’t actually believe this) 30 Witty banter 34 Melanoma-fighting group 35 CO(NH2)2 36 Engaged 38 Bowlers, for example 41 Viet follower 42 * 44 Occurrence 46 With *, edible vessel formed by the perimeter of this crossword 49 Succession sequence suffix, in ecology 50 “Romeo and Juliet” in space comic 51 “The gator’s got me by the leg!!”

Answers to last week’s puzzle

time. Monotheistic culture was a horrendous idea because it just meant that all the anger and overall dickish behavior of deities was concentrated into one dude. Where are the checks and balances in that kind of system? Speaking of checks and balances, your American idea of democracy is pretty shite too. Athenian democracy had a branch that was elected simply by drawing names, which might seem like a bad idea, but then again, it’s starting to seem like a rando would trump the political tripe you’ve had to deal with of late. The same problems have always plagued humanity, but with new technology come new issues, one of which I am personally connected to.

Samana Shrestha/The Miscellany News

’ve been through ordeals that would be unthinkable to you millennials. While you were confined to the library computers because you spilled Cafe Kilimanjaro on your MacBook, I was held hostage in a cave by a one-eyed monster. If you find it hard to suppress your passions when you walk past your dorm’s vending machines stoned off your ass, imagine having to resist the songs of the Sirens. You think it’s hard to run into an ex-hookup in the omelette line? Try having a sorcerer for an ex who traps you on an island against your will and turns all your friends into pigs. And don’t even get me started on long-distance relationships. If I had had Snapchat, I could have sent Penelope some pictures that would have made her forget all about the suitors outside my house.

Even if it is a bit unfair to relive my story with modern technology in hand, I don’t think that anyone can deny that life in Ancient Greece was far more difficult. For example, you guys can disrespect the environment a lot more and only notice the deleterious effects gradually over time.

If I ever forgot to perform a prayer or even just had the wrong mindset about a nautical voyage, a gigantic trident-bearing deity would whip up a roaring storm so fast that even Republicans would be unable to deny that the climate had changed.

Realistically, Homer’s entire narrative would come crumbling down simply with location-based technology. After all, I could have just called an UBER to solve the numerous times that I ended up on an island. Come to think about it, it seems like when Homer needed to add a new aspect to my story, he just had me trapped on another island. He either did that or introduced a new monster. Or had a monster trap me on an island.

Homer’s storytelling is actually remarkably

simple, but also extremely effective. Hasn’t society made any other good literature yet? I think the answer is probably no because you guys consider “The Rock” a relevant actor. My life during those years in the Odyssey was as turbulent and unpleasant as The Rock’s cataclysmic role in that earthquake movie. My only solace was that Homer at least had the guts to name the goddamn work after me, whereas “San Andreas” was not called “The Dwayneer” or even “Rocky Road.”

All I know is that technology has been about the only thing you guys have improved, and while it would render the entire Odyssey pointless, it doesn’t fix the other stuff you all set up after my

No, I’m not talking about the Honda Odyssey– those cars really embody my durable, while at times slightly unattractive, legacy. It’s the Odyssey Online, particularly the Vassar College branch that gives me a bad name.

When I first heard that there was a website bearing my name dedicated to promoting student writing, I was as optimistic as I was when I set out on my journey from Troy. However, the layout alone was enough to make me wish I was back in the cave with the Cyclops. The tame articles are constantly interrupted by ads with abrasive color schemes or by artfully-embedded malware.

The articles themselves are also clickbait, but they aren’t trying to lure you into computer viruses, but rather into thickets of content that are relevant to about one percent of the population, and interesting to maybe one percent of that one percent. I don’t need 19 different ways to know that I’m from Wyoming, because honestly I didn’t think that there even are 19 people in Wyoming.

If certain types of Facebook posts have been so overdone, the solution is not to write another goddamn article about them. I’m really just against articles that are lists, because creative ideas really get watered down for lists. If Homer had written the Odyssey for the Odyssey Online, it would show up as an article called “17 times the gods fucked Odysseus over” or “The 5 best island prisons for Odysseus.”

Writers and readers alike need to move away from the 10 ideas that are at the bottom of the barrel and back towards the Homerian epic that depicted such a handsome protagonist. Will future generations consider the Odyssey Online on par with the actual Odyssey? We can only hope that the ancient epic will far overshadow its online namesake, and that people don’t begin to associate me with it in the same way that people associate Homer with a two-dimensional idiot. D’oh!

The Miscellany Crossword

by York Chen, Collin Knopp−-Schwyn, and Alycia Beattie 53 Last week’s is in the bottom left of this page 55 Humiliation 59 “Person of the Year” magazine 60 Deg alternative 61 Bootlegger’s nemesis 63 Its official languages include Quechua and Aymara 66 Like many a music festival port-a-john (2 words) 68 The “carte” in à la carte 71 Frondly tree ACROSS 73 The palms of the feet 1 74 Greek Cupid or unleavened 1 Chapati, 75 Fiery Italianflat* mountain Indian 14 5 * unit 76 Falafel companions 9 Toroid * or Scottish quick * 77 Type of Irish 14 It canIndian be spun 78 Leavened flat* 17

Gone Bowling

40 Tapioca-like starch 43 Meat joint 45 Spanish * 47 Tail motion 48 Wealth bestowal 50 Incline further 52 “Get ___!”

54 Person behind home plate, sometimes 55 Nordic flat* 56 City that celebrated its 1000th anniversary in 2010

Collin Knopp−Schwyn, York Chen and Alycia Beattie 2

3

4

5

6

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57 Old baby 58 Dharma and Greg 62 Successor to Claudius 64 Pro ___ (proportionally, in Latin) 65 Radius neighbor 67 Old Man partner 69 Assent, like a bobblehead 70 Country where one can find Lingle, House, or Roy 72 Chinese 30-Down with “tou” 8

9

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15 Deets 16 Acclimate (alt. spelling) DOWN 20 21 22 23 17 Northeast waterway 18 1/760 of an atm 1 Reuben * 25 26 27 28 19 What you may 2 Water beaters ravenously * 3 Crossword editors, do for to example 20 Kindto change 34 30 31 32 33 4 Resistance 22the Shrek, York 5 Like Mug, or some nights 24inCries 6 “As Yoko?”of protest 35 36 37 25 Fratty 7 Picked hair garb 28 Mudd,office for one, 8 Blacksmith’s 41 42 43 amirite??! (we don’t 9 Beg actually 10 Mandela Partybelieve this) 46 47 48 49 30shit Witty banter 11 Bat 34 Melanoma−fighting 12 404 message group flat* 51 52 53 13 Norwegian CO(NH2)2 21 A35 fuckin lot 36 Engaged 23 Weaver who sang “OctaHate” (2014) 59 55 56 57 58 38 Bowlers, 26 Nudity hider for example 41 Viet follower 27 Gel matrices 60 61 62 42 * 29 “Chandelier” singer (2014) 44 Occurrence 30 Small round * 46 With *, edible vessel 66 67 68 69 70 31 League including Egypt, Jordan and not formed by the perimeter really Syria as of 2011 of this crossword 32 Video game teaser 74 73 49 Succession sequence 33 Fencing sticks suffix 37 Clairvoyant’s cards 77 76 50 "Romeo and Juliet" in 39 Spicy Pad space comic 51 "The gator’s got me by © CC−BY 4.0 the leg!!"

DOWN MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE31 League including Egypt, 53 Last week’s is in the Jordan and not really 1 Reuben * bottom left of this page Syria as of 2011 2 Water beaters 55 Humiliation 32 Video game teaser 3 Crossword editors, for 59 "Person of the Year" 33 Fencing sticks example

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65 Radius neighbor 67 Old Man partner 69 Assent, like a bobblehead 70 Country where one can

ARTS

Page 14

March 3, 2016

Fuerstman set to perform mezzo-soprano senior recital Noah Purdy

Guest Reporter

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gram material is wise and personal. Some of the selections on her recital program are challenging and rather unusual for a senior recital,” noted Mogavero.

Also unlike most senior recitalists, Fuerstman is not a music major. “I feel incredibly lucky to have gotten such a rich music education here at Vassar and to be a part of a supportive, welcoming and amazingly talented community of musicians even though I didn’t major in music,” she remarked.

Fuerstman will be graduating this year as a history major with an education correlate, which only speaks more to her extracurricular dedication to music. In fact, this year she has also been working on her history thesis, a draft of which is due a week after the recital. Outside of classes in the Music Department, Fuerstman has made a point to be as involved as possible with her passion at Vassar. She has sung in the Vassar College Women’s Chorus and the Vassar Madrigal Singers since her freshman year, and participated in campus productions such as the opera “Dido and Aeneas,” in which she sang the lead last semester.

“People often don’t realize how much work is involved in the art. I try to practice at least an hour a day, and [I know that] even as a non-music major...Rachel practices just about as much,” commented fellow singer and recitalist Madeline Pollis ’16.

Yet all of this hard work pays off in the end.

Senior recitals are a way to showcase the culmination of a students’ growth and all that they have learned during their time at Vassar.

As organist Sarah Johnson ’16 stated, “Most musicians’ friends on campus don’t get a chance to hear them perform individually much ... [A] senior recital is a way of saying, ‘This is what I’ve been working on, this is why I spend all my free time in Skinner, this is why I’m in five different musical groups on campus. I have been pursuing perfection in my own field and I have achieved something that I am proud of.’”

Fuerstman has indeed been pursuing perfec-

tion in music. Besides highly complimenting her for her warm personality and hard-working dedication, a number of Vassar faculty members who have worked closely with Fuerstman mentioned how much she has grown as an artist.

“She works hard, has a beautiful voice and brings an intelligent, sensitive approach to the music,” commented Mogavero. “She brings a certain gentle quietude...[and has cultivated a] beautiful, dark vocal sound,” added Senior Lecturer of Music Drew Minter, Fuerstman’s conductor in the Madrigal Singers.

Despite the pressures among senior recitalists to have perfect show elements (dress, reception, etc.), all of the interviewed senior musicians expressed a lot of gratitude for the amazing opportunity to demonstrate the sum

total of all of their passionate dedication and hard work in front of the people closest to them.

Fuerstman will be followed by fellow recitalists soprano Karen Ratcliffe ’16, bassoonist Gregory Cristina ’16, soprano Madeline Pollis ’16, organist Sarah Johnson ’16, soprano Asia Howard ’16, soprano Ruby Pierce ’16 and soprano Alyssa Caplan ’16, who will be performing throughout the month of April.

As Fuerstman reflected on the experience, “I’ve never had an entire performance where it was all eyes on me, just Rachel singing for an hour...Music has really defined my four years here, and I think my senior recital is a way to pay homage to that and to thank the people who have taught me so much since I’ve been here by showing what I’ve learned.”

courtesy of Rachel Fuerstman

n spring, Vassar rears its creative head when seniors scramble to showcase the last artistic endeavors of their undergraduate careers.

For Rachel Fuerstman ’16, along with a number of talented senior music students, this means tackling the daunting yet rewarding task of performing a senior recital. Fuerstman, a mezzo-soprano, will be showcasing her talent in the first senior recital of the semester on March 5 in the Skinner Hall Mary Anna Fox Martel Recital Hall.

Fuerstman’s performance will also feature violist Daniel Melody ’19, guitarist Ethan Cohen ’16 and accompanist Richard Mogavero.

The senior recital process begins long before senior year. Students submit a proposal as early as April of their junior year, and then the work begins, preparing a set list and working with a voice teacher—often the same one they have been working with during their time at Vassar– to perfect their sound. Students often choose songs strategically, adding difficult or interesting pieces to their repertoires for later use in graduate school applications or real-world auditions. Since Fuerstman’s professional musical future is uncertain, though, picking songs for her recital was less strategic and more personal, meant to show off her unique qualities and acquired skills.

As she explains, “Choosing the program sort of happened organically, thinking about what pieces I really enjoyed singing during my time at Vassar and what pieces would be fun to learn...I basically picked music that I love to sing.” Her voice teacher, Adjunct Artist in Music Mary Nessinger, is also a mezzo-soprano, so they were able to collaborate even more closely.

What they ultimately settled on are pieces

by Bizet, Brahms, Alma Mahler, Rachmaninoff and Tchaikovsky, as well as a few American jazz standards. This eclectic mix of styles—including arias sung in the original Russian—is a bit outside of the norm. “Her choice of pro-

Rachel Fuerstman is set to deliver her senior recital She is one of the few senior recitalists who are not actually music majors. For Fuerstman, the recital is a chance to show off years of hard work.

Celebration of art, community children, life of alum Sabrina Oh Reporter

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hildren, education and art are fundamental posterities and essential parts of Vassar’s foundation. Out of both love and celebration, John Iyoya ’83 highlighted these intersections.

In return, his classmates and many at the College celebrate them as part of an annual festival, which consists of an art exhibition and prize winner. The “John Iyoya Prize” is awarded to a student who embodies Iyoya’s views towards education and children.

Sponsored by the Department of Education and featuring the artwork of students from participating schools, “A Celebration of Art” is an annual event held in memory of Iyoya, who had a love for children and a formidable sense of creativity.

Administrative Assistant of the Education Department Dayle Rebelein discussed his ex-

citement for the event. He wrote, “The art festival is a crazy wonderful celebration of children’s art. We have eight to ten local art teachers who annually work very hard to fill the Palmer gallery full to bursting with children’s art. You have never seen the gallery so full...Just search for ‘Iyoya’ on the Vassar web site and you will be able to see years worth of art. It’s pretty amazing.”

As dynamic as the event is, it came about after Iyoya’s passing. Rebelein explained, “Behind all of this fun is a serious reason from which this all began. John Iyoya was an outstanding student in Elementary Education at Vassar.

He was particularly strong in his ability to apply aesthetics to classroom teaching. He loved children, he loved teaching and he loved art. After his tragic death, the Department of Education decided to honor him with an annu-

courtesy of Vassar College

“A Celebration of Art” is an annual festival that celebrates the life of John Iyoya ’83. The Palmer exhibit debuts over break and includes works from various Poughkeepsie grade and middle schools.

al art show featuring the work of local elementary and middle school children.”

With the help of Iyoya’s former classmates, the exhibition came together. Rebelein continued, “Members of his class gathered funds to establish an annual prize in Elementary Teacher Education in John’s memory. This prize is given to the senior student in Elementary Education who demonstrates a love of children and teaching and who shows marked application of creativity to the day-to-day tasks of the classroom ... 14 friends of John’s established and maintain this fund.”

This year, the prize will be awarded to Sophie Lederman ’16, who has demonstrated a love of teaching and an application of creativity. Rebelein commented, “This year, our lovely, talented and creative Sophie Lederman will be awarded the prize in John’s honor at the awarding of prizes ceremony during graduation.

Sophie has earned her elementary education certificate while a student here, she completed her student teaching practicum this past fall semester.”

Many of Iyoya’s close friends started the fund. Before Dr. Andy Berman ’83, a friend of Iyoya’s, came to the 2014 commencement, he wrote, “John was my very close friend and housemate at Vassar and with help from his many friends and his family, we were able to establish this Prize in his memory shortly after his untimely death.”

Berman continued, “I have attended this ceremony many times since graduation (in 1983), though unfortunately, not recently. When I was able to attend, I always found it deeply meaningful to see a new generation of gifted students be honored, while at the same time celebrating my friend. I look forward to returning to Vassar once again this weekend.”

Participants include a countless amount of schools and constitute a population of budding young artists of many ages and from many different backgrounds. Rebelein noted, “For 31 years, the Education Department and these devoted teachers have been putting on this show.

The show will include artwork by students

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

from Overlook Primary School, Noxon Road Elementary School, G.W. Krieger Elementary School, Warring Magnet Academy of Science and Technology, Morse Young Child Magnet School, Hagan Elementary School, Nassau Elementary School, Lagrange Middle School, Todd Middle School and Wimpfheimer Nursery School at Vassar College.”

Rebelein, however, noted the unfortunate timing of the festival for some. He wrote, “The festival tends to run over spring break every year so sadly the students here do not often get to see it.”

But Rebelein remains unfazed by the slight scheduling predicament. Despite a similar schedule last year, more than 200 works of art were presented in the gallery. The works included paintings, drawings, sculptures and more–making it a truly eclectic exhibition.

The breadth of schools represented ensures a strong community turnout at the event.

Rebelein, in fact, expressed not only his own excitement but also the excitement of these youth artists and their family members. The event has meant a lot to families in the community. Rebelein explained, “The show will run the first week of break. Teachers will begin to put up the art Friday afternoon. Sunday, March 13 will be the open house and hundreds of children and parents and grandparents will come to see the showcase. It’s very exciting, the kids and parents are very excited and the teachers work really, really hard at this.”

The opening reception will take place on Sunday, March 13, 2016 at 2 p.m. in the Palmer Gallery located in the College Center. The exhibition will be on display from March 13 to March 18 and 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Rebelein maintains fresh excitement for the decades-long tradition. Rebelein concluded, “[A]s you can see this Iyoya event has many layers and is a very big deal. 31 years this has been rolling along and for the community, generations of elementary and middle school kids have had this connection to Vassar and our teacher preparation program. Pretty neat, huh?”

March 3, 2016

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Battle of the Bands benefits both performers, audiences Jimmy Christon Columnist

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well as RDGLDGRN and Tech N9ne. Despite influences from some of hip-hop’s best, Lee brings a new fusion to the table. He explained, “My style is uniquely mine. I haven’t ever really heard anyone who does things quite like me. I tell stories. I make references. That stuff is obviously normal in hip-hop, but my flow and my lyrical style are mine.”

While events like Battle of the Bands are fun for audiences, they provide much needed opportunities for artists to perform and improve.

Lee explained, “The event is also good practice for the Throwback Festival happening in April (another Hip-Hop 101 event). There is not really just a whole lot of chances for hip-hop artists to perform on campus, so I take any chance I can to showcase my abilities.”

Run to Earth member Cole Fisher ’18 is also set to perform. His group is composed of him

courtesy of Facebook

ou’d be hard pressed to find two things more universal to humans than music and competition. Groups of people from Russia to Brazil have their own forms of music. Those same cultures throughout history have all competed in some way or another. So, being the creative beings that we are, it’s only logical to mix the two together. While some people might tune into the new season of American Idol, Vassar students won’t have to wait through any commercial breaks to get their fix of musical competition. On Saturday, March 5 they can just head to the Susan Stein Shiva Theater at 8:30 p.m.

Josselyn House is hosting the event, which is now in its third year. According to Joss House Team member Sasha Israel ‘18, “Well it’s definitely been a very collaborative effort. We have an amazing president who’s been working really hard to organize everything and put everyone one house team to work.”

Israel continued, “We are really excited to have a good mix of judges this year that includes underclassmen who will listen to the music through fresh ears, and we just want to try to cultivate a really big and energetic audience for the bands through advertising.”

The performances will all be by students and cover a wide range of genres and styles. There are a total of four groups performing: Portrait Day, The Live Ins, Quota Lee, The Run to Earth and Lizard Pile.

Don’t be expecting one genre to dominate the performances like in a traditional concert or other campus musical events, however. Few competitions bring together everything from EDM to Punk Rock and promise to crown a winner by the end of the night. According to Israel, this diversity was part of the plan. “We’re also pumped because we have a wide range of genres in the lineup, so there’s kind of something for everyone,” she said.

The five performers will go on one after the other. The winner will receive ultimate brag-

ging rights. This is the third annual Battle of the Bands, and some of these bands have performed in the event in years past. And while some bands that have performed in years past aren’t performing this year, there are brand new performers that are participating this year to keep things fresh.

One of the performers is Quota Lee, the hiphop persona of Dakota Lee ’19. According to Lee, “This will make my second hip-hop performance after the Hip-Hop 101 event last semester which was Four Pillars. I love performing music and hip-hop is something that comes directly from my soul. I have a deeply personal relationship with the genre.”

Lee draws influence from across the history of Hip-Hop, ranging from modern MCs such as Kendrick Lamar or Tyler, the Creator to bona fide classics such as A Tribe Called Quest as

Joss is hosting the third Battle of the Bands this weekend. The event offers students an exciting competition to watch as well as giving student bands a much-needed platform to perform.

along with Ernie Suarez ’18 and Jack Fischer ’18.

The Run to Earth is an Indie folk/pop outfit.

According to Fisher, “All of our songs are original compositions so that’s a pretty significant part of our identity. It’s been a really interesting project for Jack and I as we come from very different musical backgrounds. I write a lot of acoustic, melodic indie folk/pop while he comes from a background of much more intense pop punk.”

Fischer is also in another band performing in the battle of the bands: Lizard Pile. This group consists of the aforementioned Jack Fischer along with Max Frank ’18, Ben Luongo ’19 and Oriana Catton ’17. Where Run to Earth is more acoustic and melodic, Lizard Pile is electric, energetic and loud.

Lizard Pile is a punk rock band, and draws influences from groups such as Brand New and Counterpart. According to Fisher, “In my opinion [Lizard Pile is] very likely to win, and I think the difference between our two styles will be made pretty apparent.”

But Fisher isn’t too worried about these musical differences. He explained, “Those [genres] are pretty hard to compare, but I think everyone is really excited just to play in front of a large audience and get our sound out there.”

The event provides opportunities for audiences and bands alike. Framing the concert as a competition between groups allows for a great diversity in musical styles and gives student performances equal chance to perform than say an event that is strictly for hip-hop or just as opening acts for other bands.

According to Fisher, “We are super excited to be playing in battle of the bands. This will be Ernie and I’s first year in the show, but I can tell you what I’ve observed so far. This year’s Battle of the Bands feels a lot less like a competition and more like a diverse showcase. This year we’ve got EDM, indie folk, hip hop and punk rock all rolled into a single show.”

The judges have no easy job—with so many different performers, it will be hard to crown just one band the “winner.”

Orchestra celebrates 115th anniversary with spring concert Elena Schultz

Guest Reporter

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courtesy of Vassar College Media Relations

or over a century, the Vassar College Orchestra has been in the business of making music, challenging societal norms and building community.

In light of its 115th anniversary this year, the Vassar College Orchestra will be celebrating with its first spring concert on Saturday, March 5 at 8 p.m. in Skinner Hall, and will be webcast for those not able to attend. Directed by Professor Eduardo Navega, the program will feature works by Février, Beethoven, Delibes, Albeniz and Gomes.

Every year, Vassar Orchestra’s spring programming centers on its featured student soloists, the winners of Vassar’s annual Soloist Competition. The Soloist Competition is held each fall semester to provide Vassar vocalists and instrumentalists with the opportunity to perform alongside the orchestra. “Before they apply, they consult with me about their pieces that they’re doing ... If they want to do a piece that requires an orchestra that we don’t have, players that we don’t have, then I will suggest that they do something else,” said Navega.

The March 5 concert will highlight two winners of the Soloist Competition: soprano Ruby Pierce ’16 will be featured on Delibes’ Indian Bell Song from “Lakme,” as well as pianist Jenny Zheng ’18 on Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 4 in G Major.

Zheng wrote in an emailed statement, “I chose this particular Beethoven concerto, the fourth one, because it’s like a chamber music piece on a bigger scale. The third and fifth concertos are much more grand and dramatic like what people think of when they think of Beethoven, but the fourth one offers a more intimate sound.” She continued, “Playing with an orchestra is a lot more fun in some ways because you’re not alone on stage and it’s a collaborative effort, but at the same time, it can be more nerve racking because so many people are depending on you.”

This sense of collaboration is a widely-echoed sentiment. Orchestra member Andy

Thompson ’18 affirmed, “It’s an incredible experience to come together with 60 strangers and spend five hours a week working together and communicating with each other through music. You will often never get to know many of them and know nothing about them other than that they share your passion and dedication to music.”

Unsurprisingly, the tradition of dedication to music at Vassar is not new. “The symphony orchestra of Vassar College gave its first concert on May the 17th, 1901,” explained Navega.

With the exception of wartime years, “We have programs for every single concert the orchestra ever did.”

Due to Vassar’s history as an all-female college, the orchestra’s first-documented 1901 program features a roster comprised entirely of women. In light of the fading notion that certain instruments are more feminine or masculine, the first orchestra’s instrumental composition differed almost entirely from that of today’s ensemble.

“Indeed, it was a women’s college, so they did have a lack of some instruments. For example, there were not too many women in the early to mid-20th century that would play trombone, or trumpet for that matter,” explained Navega.

He continued, “Nowadays, thank God, all of the girls play everything, as they should, but at some point it wasn’t very ladylike to play trombone.”

While the female musicians of Vassar were once expected to play traditionally feminine instruments, like harp or flute, the introduction of co-education to Vassar in 1969 brought with it an entirely new sound to the orchestra, and eventually a new way of thinking as well. Navega explained, “When the college became co-ed, you have lots of boys coming in and those boys would play instruments that normally the girls would not. And now, of course, our tuba player is a girl, which is awesome. We have an all-female wind quintet.”

Member of Vassar’s all-female wind quintet Fiona Hart ’18 echoes Navega’s sentiments. “Instruments should not be gendered. There’s this

On March 5 at 8 p.m., The Vassar College Orchestra, under the direction of Professor Eduardo Navega, will hold its first spring concert in celebration of the ensemble’s 115th anniversary. understanding that no matter what field you’re in, men are better ... Gender is independent of your ability to play the oboe.”

Navega continues to look to the future of the ensemble for inspiration, while paying respects to its rich and longstanding history. “Before I came here, I worked with professional orchestras ... This is actually the first student orchestra under my direction, and I have to say, I much prefer it.”

He continued, “Even though a student orchestra might limit the repertoire that you could do...I don’t mind that, because having a student orchestra is always a discovery for them. So you’re giving something to them that they’re not bored with yet, they’re still fascinated by all of those things.”

Navega began his work at Vassar in 1999 as a part-time conductor, and is now the director of the orchestra and head of the chamber music

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

program, as well as a lecturer in music. “Now, it’s a profession that requires more from me, to be able to give something to the students. It’s more than conducting, it’s teaching, really.”

To some though, it might even be more than teaching. For many professional orchestras, sexism doesn’t just dictate which instruments women can play, it bars them from the playing anything at all. According to The Guardian, women auditioning for elite orchestras are 50 percent more likely to make it past preliminary rounds if the auditions are conducted blindly.

115 years, 18 conductors and a multitude of ardent musicians later, the spirit of the Vassar Orchestra endures–and so do the values of this progressive institution. “We do this for the students,” Navega emphasizes. “It’s the students playing for the students.” But the significance goes beyond that; especially in a world more intent on hearing politics than quality music.

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VRDT returns to Bardavon

Fuller House falls flat, relies on nostalgia Saachi Jain

Guest Columnist

Fuller House Jeff Franklin Netflix

star as recurring or guest characters; the only ones who refused to come back were the Olsen twins, a fact to which the show refers multiple times. The writers seem to be bitter about it, but considering the travesty that “Fuller House” ended up being, the Olsen twins made the smart decision.

DANCE continued from page 1

The dancers come from different backgrounds, which gives each one their own flair. It differs from HYPE and FlyPeople by creating a liaison between the Dance Department and Vassar students, which allows for everybody to learn and help each other develop their skills in an academic and professional environment.

According to Assistant to the Director of VRDT Emily Martin ’18, “VRDT works with the same repertoire throughout the whole year.

So, when we begin to prepare for the Bardavon in January, we’ve already performed the pieces we are preparing to present. Thus, the rehearsals are less about developing choreography and more about perfecting that choreography that we learned back in the fall. Of course, some changes are made, however rehearsals for Bardavon consist more of ‘cleaning’ pieces.”

This year’s gala will feature 12 student-choreographed pieces in addition to the faculty-choreographed dances. The styles range all over the place, containing mixtures of modern, jazz and ballet, to name a few. While there isn’t an overall theme to the dances, each individual piece does draw on its own images. Within these dances is a full scope of diverse topics, from alienation to 1950s housewives.

Martin elaborated on these performances, “VRDT is a modern dance-based company. Each year the company is divided in two and half of the company works with one modern dance professor and the other half works with the other modern dance professor. This is the one participation requirement of the company. Members can also choose to audition for the ballet repertory of the year.” She continued, “In addition to ballet and faculty choreographed pieces, we have student-choreographed pieces. It is in this area that the style of dance widens. We usually have a couple ballet-based pieces, some contemporary dance pieces and then pieces that could be considered more modern.”

Many upperclassmen eventually choreographing pieces of their own that meld together many styles of dance. Many professors also create pieces in the styles that they teach.

Elaborating on how her new dancers approached an unfamiliar style of dance, choreographer and Adjunct Dance Instructor Abby Saxon explained, “My dancers had to acquire a very specific jazz style, which involves body isolations, difficult coordination, as well as a way of connecting movements and body parts that is quite different from contemporary dance or hip hop. For some of them this was new, and it took a while to really feel this way of moving as natural, yet they all mastered it. They are clearly having fun; they are charming, humorous and skillful too!”

Despite the choreographers planning out their pieces, input from the dancers also shaped the final product. Just as every writer has a particular style in which they write, each dancer has a unique technique to their craft as well, which makes a performance truly their own. Through collaboration between the choreographer and the dancers, a piece can become something completely different from what either imagined.

Describing the collaborative effort her piece “Ribbit” took, student choreographer Kelsey Greenway ’16 said, “In the making of this piece, I gave the dancers prompts, which they used to create a solo. The prompts ranged from, ‘draw a squiggly line,’ to ‘cradle a small animal,’ and ‘scare something.’ These movement phrases became the foundation of the piece, and made it personal to each of the dancers. I think that is why these 12 heterogeneous women could look like one entity on stage.”

“Everything inspires me to make a dance: music, the dancers and their qualities, a red-tailed hawk, my dog Koda, foxes and about any bird that flies.” Assistant Director of VRDT Kathy Wildberger said about the creative energy that dance evokes and produces. “Rehearsals are wonderful when the cast of dancers is cooperative and professional. My dancers were and they also assisted and supported me during a very difficult time. I would say that dance can actually heal a person.

For we dancers, the studio is home. We can leave everything outside the room and dance.”

March 3, 2016

In the past year or so, reunions and revivals of people’s favorite cancelled TV shows have filled everyone with nostalgia. The first one I remember was the “Veronica Mars” movie in 2014. From there, different reboots inundated us–from “Twin Peaks” to “Gilmore Girls” to “The X Files.” Hearing about a “Gilmore Girls” revival more or less made my entire year, since it’s my favorite show of all time. The finale also left me unsatisfied and wanting more. I thought it was great that shows that ended prematurely got a chance to wrap up loose ends and get the closure they deserved.

“Full House,” however, had absolutely no reason to get a revival; the show ran from 1987 to 1995, with 8 seasons, 192 episodes and a good ending that left its viewers content. When the sequel series, “Fuller House,” was announced, I was immediately filled with dread, expecting the very worst. I had “Girl Meets World” as precedent, which is a decent enough show on its own, but screwed up a lot of things for the original characters we know and love. “Fuller House,” though, ended up being even worse than I thought; not only did it tarnish all the things I loved about “Full House” but there was also nothing about the show that was enjoyable or unique.

A wave of nostalgia hit me when I started the first episode, but the writers of “Fuller House” seemed to think nostalgia could carry a show on its own. Three of the “Full House” characters return to the reboot as regulars–D.J. Tanner (who is now D.J. Fuller), Stephanie Tanner and Kimmy Gibbler–which was its first mistake. Most of the other original cast members

“The show uses the same jokes, the same famous lines, and the same tired storylines.”

The premise of “Fuller House” is exactly like its parent show, but flipped–after the death of D.J.’s husband, Stephanie and Kimmy move in with her to help take care of her three sons, as well as Kimmy’s daughter. The plotlines in the 13-episode season are repetitive and mundane; neither the adults’ love lives nor the children’s adventures are particularly interesting. They feel especially forced because of how heavily they rely on recycling everything from the original show. It was bad enough that D.J. had to be widowed, but then, towards the end of the season, she gets a new love interest–who is none other than Steve Hale, D.J.’s first real boyfriend, because apparently everything is just the same as it was in high school.

The show’s insistence on packing in as many references as it possibly can to “Full House” makes it appear as if nothing has changed since the ’90s. The writers didn’t seem to know how much nostalgia is too much, and the end result is that the characters seem to be totally static. They haven’t changed since they were teenagers, and neither has the world around them. The show uses the same jokes, the same famous lines and the same tired storylines.

Everything about it is predictable and it tries too hard to be funny, making it contrived and

cringe-worthy.

In addition to the overload of “Full House” reminiscence, which really fills the majority of the show, the newer characters are not well written or captivating at all. The four children in the house add nothing to the show and I found myself bored during most of their individual scenes. The dynamics between the kids and the adults at least could have been endearing, but the series falls flat even on that. I did like some of the scenes between the three adult women–for a few moments, the original appeal of D.J., Stephanie and Kimmy’s friendship returned, but those scenes were rare and not enough to override the embarrassment of the rest.

There were also things about it that were downright offensive–such as a random Bollywood dance number with all white people, and having Stephanie and Kimmy kiss simply to get Kimmy back with her boyfriend. The show does have slightly more diversity than “Full House” did. Kimmy’s daughter is biracial, but I would argue that this one character is not nearly enough. The content that wasn’t offensive was simply ridiculous, and it was a chore to watch the season to the very end.

For many of us, “Full House” was a big part of our childhood. Even casual fans of the show fondly remember it. Though I never watched all the episodes religiously, the reruns were frequently on in the background, making them hard to avoid for anyone with a TV. “Fuller House” will do nothing but corrupt any fond memories you may have of the show, making the characters you used to love unbearable and milking its nostalgia aspect for all its worth until you never want to hear a reference to “Full House” ever again. For the first few minutes, your heart might warm up in seeing all the familiar faces, but that won’t last long. The series is available on Netflix to stream, but I recommend skipping it altogether and watching reruns of the much superior original if you’re truly feeling sentimental.

Pop-synth sounds amplify debut album Patrick Tanella Reporter

Don’t You Wet Columbia Records

W

et is the most interesting band you have never heard of. When I first told my mom I was going to a Wet concert, she told me to bring an umbrella. While the name might throw some people off, the group has provided a sound that was missing in the alternative pop industry. Wet describes their music as a blend of R&B and alternative pop. Their pop-synth beats and the beautiful, haunting voice of head singer Kelly Zutrau provide perfect break up music for the typical moody, angsty teen.

In addition to Zutrau, Wet comprises guitarist Marty Sulkow and instrumentalist Joe Valle.

The band met in New York in college and while they went their separate ways for a couple of years, they knew they wanted to write music.

After living and performing in small shows in Brooklyn in 2013, they began to spark attention and were signed to Columbia Records. Under Neon Gold Records, a branch of Columbia, they released their self-titled EP in 2014.

I was first exposed to Wet under a compilation album titled “Common Culture” put together by social media star Connor Franta. The album works to promote small or unknown artists by putting them under Franta’s label and producing an album with an artist’s most notable song.

While listening to “Common Culture,” I heard the song “You’re the Best.” While I didn’t enjoy most of the compilation, this song’s haunting sound stuck with me. I immediately researched the band and found their EP. I knew from just listening to the four songs on the EP that this group would blow up.

Approximately a year later, Wet announced that they would be performing in NYC. I jumped at the chance to see one of my favorite groups and bought tickets right away. While

the set was simple and it was mostly just the band on a stage, the show was amazing. Zutrau appeared nervous at first, but after the first two songs she began to smile and interact with the crowd. The set featured songs off of their EP and also new songs off of their debut album, “Don’t You.” The new songs heavily utilized instrumentals and pop-synth sounds, which I found to be even more appealing. Overall, the concert was relaxed and moving, and made me love the group even more.

“I knew from just listening to the four songs on the EP that this group would blow up.”

After almost a year and a half wait, Wet’s debut album, “Don’t You,” was released this January. The 11-song tracklist includes “You’re the Best” from their EP and “Deadwater,” a single released in the time between the EP and the album. The other nine songs are new and illustrate a more produced, synth sound that contrasts the smaller-scale EP. I feel as though the songs are in no particular order, but each one conveys a different feeling or attitude. The first song, “It’s All in Vain,” is dramatically different from the EP. It is one of the faster songs on the album and discusses Zutrau’s idea of someone being in a room with you physically but not emotionally.

She laments, “When you say you love me baby let me see your face. And when you say you’ll never leave me know that it’s all in vain. And these memories, they haunt me wherever I go.”

You can feel the loneliness in Zutrau’s pleading voice as she begs for her love to be reciprocated.

The next track, “Deadwater,” was released in the interim period between the EP and album. The lyrics evoke evocative feelings and nostalgia towards her mother, who raised her

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

as a single parent. Zutrau sings, “And my face turned to red from drinking all that deadwater.

And then again when you said that I was my mother’s daughter.” Continuing through the album, “Don’t Wanna Be Your Girl” is a track that was also on the EP. It is my favorite track off of the EP, as it describes the struggle of finally ending a toxic relationship.

The lead single off of the album, “Weak,” is the next prominent track. While I do not think it is the group’s best song, it garnered a lot of attention and is helping them gain traction in the alternative music industry–which could mean we’ll be seeing more from the group in the future.

While most of the album’s songs are breakup songs, “Weak” is a love song describing Zutrau’s vulnerability as she is finally in a healthy relationship and is attempting to feel comfortable. She pleads, “Baby, please don’t leave me. You are all I ever need.” I think that the song is too clingy and desperate to be a real love song, although it does illustrate Zutrau’s feelings and openness well.

Other songs on the album tend to blend together under the same melodic beat and vocals. A standout track for me is “These Days,” which is currently my favorite on the album.

It is the last song and I think it serves well as a conclusion for the debut album. It brilliantly showcases Zutrau’s voice over a piano, which is a nice change from the electronic background on the rest of the album. Standout lines include, “And I know what it takes. And I think we can make it through everything. You are all I knew.”

The only problems that I find with the album are the repetitive synth background instrumentals in almost every song. While they are enjoyable, they get old about five tracks in.

In addition, Zutrau has an amazing voice, but I would like to see her try something different than her typical harrowing break up song, which can be cliche and redundant. Overall, with their debut album “Don’t You,” Wet has proven to be a unique, promising group on the alternative pop scene that will only continue to confuse moms and stormwatchers everywhere.

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March 3, 2016

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Marvel succeeds with risky TV pursuit Jillian Elkin Columnist

Jessica Jones Melissa Rosenberg Netflix

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eason 2 of Marvel’s Daredevil comes out on Netflix on March 18, 2016. In honor of the premiere, I’m taking a peek into the Marvel television universe and an even closer look at one of the shows that stands above the rest: “Marvel’s Jessica Jones.”

The Marvel Cinematic Universe television series began in 2013 and, as of now, airs on ABC and Netflix. The characters and shows in the Netflix Marvel world will eventually overlap with each other. Daredevil, Jessica Jones, Luke Cage and Iron Fist are the primary superheroes. “Marvel’s Luke Cage” and “Marvel’s Iron Fist” are currently in the works. Eventually, all the characters will unite in “Marvel’s Defenders,” But that moment is in the distant future.

Marvel’s ability to create a world on a streaming site and ensure years of television production is impressive and incredibly reflective of the current state of technology and habits of television viewers. No network television channel could sustain many new series–with continuous renewals–most of which aren’t even fully developed when they’re given okayed by execs. It would be too costly and too much of a risk for big networks to bet on these less established shows. Thus, Marvel’s occupancy on ABC has been traditional with the development and sale of one series at a time. If one show was cancelled, the others could still continue. While online streaming offers new opportunities for low-budget, independent creators, massive franchises are taking advantage of the relatively new system in their own ways.

Additionally, the viewers of the shows are not necessarily the same demographic as the people who pay to see Marvel’s movies in theaters. In fact, the viewers of each show aren’t

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the same. (Though, all the shows across viewing platforms have been well-received.) Given the time constraints of film, the plots can feel confusing for viewers who are unacquainted with in-depth comic book knowledge. However, TV series begin with mystery and aim to become increasingly clear. Thus, they are more accessible to viewers with little knowledge of or interest in comics. The television presence from Marvel has also proven that massive budgets for impressive sets, stunts, special effects and pyrotechnics aren’t requirements for an excellent action series.

“Marvel’s Jessica Jones” makes the most of its budget as it errs on the side of realism. Yes, Jessica Jones, Luke Cage and Kilgrave have superpowers. But the show doesn’t emphasize them as a movie would. Supposedly, these characters exist in the same world as the Hulk and Captain America. However, that’s difficult to imagine, considering Jessica Jones gives off the energy of a detective, psychological drama.

Jones has the gifts of super strength and flight, but she’s finished with her superhero days as the series opens. She’s recovering from her traumatic experience with Kilgrave (a sociopath with mind control) and working as a private investigator. Jones comes across as dry and sarcastic.

That light, snarky humor runs throughout the series, despite the dark themes. It makes the dialogue sharp and quick. This makes the show’s pacing enjoyable and builds the tension over the course of each episode, which is nearly an hour long. When the series continues and incorporates more superhuman elements, the effect can be somewhat jarring.

However, this shift picks up the pace and heightens the plot. The change is inevitable and easily forgivable.

Also, the cinematography of this neo-noir show is thrilling and impressive. It’s not something one would normally look at during a TV show, but the creative, dramatic uses of angles, lighting and color command as much attention as the characters and activity.

Warm, dark lighting and the incorporation of Venetian blinds pay homage to the noir genre,

but the show’s cinematography goes beyond the expected. The camera turns stairways and streets into mazes and brief mind games even when a character is simply walking or stumbling about them. Meanwhile, the show uses tinges of purple balanced against warm tones for Jessica and cool ones for Kilgrave to subtly support the importance of color in the comic books.

As Jessica Jones, Krysten Ritter shines.

I’ve loved her since “Don’t Trust the B---- in Apartment 23.” Once again, she’s in a role that suits her acting style and distinct look perfectly. Ritter excels with quick dialogue and a rough, yet oddly appealing personality.

David Tennant thrives as Kilgrave. He’s not in most scenes, so when he is, he holds the camera’s attention. He infuses his villainous character with a dark sense of humor and charm that tonally matches and plays off of Ritter’s Jones. The Tenth Doctor is nowhere to be seen, but Tennant is just as fun to watch. All of the characters are complex, fully-formed individuals. The viewer learns new, surprising information about each of the many superheroes as the series unfolds.

Between creator Melissa Rosenbergstarring, the badass Ritter and a powerful team of directors, the show depends on incredible talent. Jessica Jones goes beyond typical girl power superhero tropes. The show manages to avoid catering to the male gaze as it explores queer and heterosexual female sexuality.

Relationships aren’t the primary focus of the show. Yet, they are treated respectfully and as realistically as possible given the situations on the series. The series is also different from the other creations from the Marvel Universe for the serious issues it address such as rape and PTSD. Though there’s a lot going on in “Jessica Jones” and the story is told with unconventional narrative continuity, the viewer can still follow the different plotlines. “Jessica Jones” demands attention and can feel emotionally heavy, thus it’s ill-suited for binge watching. “Jessica Jones” is visually beautiful, thought-provoking and addictive.

A weekly space highlighting the creative pursuits of student-artists

Excuse me, What should Zander’s rapper name be?

“Zeezaz.”

— Ariella Rosenthal ’18

“Snickerz.”

— Lily Carlsen ’19

“If there’s Drake and Future, why not Josh and Past?”

—Maxwell Singer ’19

submit to misc@vassar.edu

“White McDoogle.”

— Dakota Lee ’19

“It takes a while to think of these. My rapper name lockjaw took years of work.”

— Sashie Cephas ’19

“Z-sweater.”

— Bianca Barragan ’19

I struggle, as most do, with how others judge me. Art, as with any academic field, can be incredibly negative. In eighth grade my art teacher asked me if I was retarded. In a world where we are always graded, art should be for discovery and self expression. For me, true art is about learning to do things for yourself and not for how others will measure you. If you hate this artwork, love it or are ambivalent, I enjoyed the process of making it and no matter how bad I may even find it, the artwork was worth it.

-Sophie Friedfeld-Gebaide ‘18

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Zander Bashaw, Humor & Satire Editor Evelyn Frick, Columnist Ashley Pecorelli, Staff Photographer

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Page 18

March 3, 2016

Lax to get back on track with big win, tough competition Olivia O’Loughlin Guest Reporter

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much success. In the 2015 season, the team rounded up 110 caused turnovers, 481 ground balls and 169 goals as a cohesive unit.

Together, the members of the men’s team hope to trump more League competitors this year.

The men had a tough 2015 season, falling to every team in the Liberty League except for Bard College. However, the players are keeping their heads high. Stebel explained, “We are all looking forward to this being our breakthrough season.”

The team hopes to redeem themselves against conference opponents such as RPI and Clarkson, who bested them during very close matches in 2015—the RPI Engineers defeated the Brewers by merely one goal in the last 21 seconds.

To prepare for tough Liberty League competition, Coach Graham has scheduled 12 non-conference games against some of the toughest teams

courtesy of Vassar Athletics

he Vassar men’s lacrosse team is off to a successful 2016 season with a huge 19-7 victory over Western Connecticut State University. According to freshman goalie Matt Boyd, “The game went well. I think we dominated in every aspect: we were about 90 percent successful on face-offs, a lot of our shots were dropping, our offense was running well and our defense worked well together.” This significant win over Western Connecticut State evidences major improvement from last season. In 2015, the Brewers inched out the Colonials by only one goal and this year Vassar triumphed by an astonishing 12-goal differential.

The team expects high energy, intensity and a positive attitude to place them on track for success. Junior captain Brandon DeStasio shared his excitement about the team chemistry on and off the field: “We have a relatively small roster which allows us all to be very close. I don’t think there is a closer team on campus.”

While tight-knit, the team is very young, with only three seniors and a large freshmen class.

Nevertheless, the boys have high hopes for the freshmen. “Our freshmen class brings a lot of talent. We have a bunch of guys who are going to contribute and make an impact this season,” stated DeStasio. Freshmen Dekker Stebel, Evan Burns and Liam Neville have already proven this, all scoring in their first game of the year. Fellow freshmen Drew Adams and Pat Gibbons also contributed with assists in their first collegiate match. Stebel noted, “As an individual, I hope to contribute as much as I can and truly give the seniors a season to remember. Overall, I hope to watch our team achieve our full potential.”

In addition to the skilled freshmen class, the lacrosse team also welcomes back many starters.

Senior captain Noah Parson has proven to be a crucial member of the squad year after year. Parson was awarded Liberty League Honorable Mention last season after he broke Vassar’s goals per season record with 35 goals. Other strong contrib-

utors include juniors Liam Moriarty, Chris Billups, Sam Houston-Read, Brandon Klein, Gianni Gelormino and Eric Prezioso, who all started in a majority of the games during their 2015 season.

This year, the Brewers have two talented goalies, junior Brandon Crecco and freshman Matt Boyd. Crecco played in eight games last year, making 35 saves, and looks to continue being a dominating presence in goal this year. Boyd also shows promise for the program, making two saves in his first collegiate contest. While they have many talented individuals, Coach Graham shared, “The most important thing is playing well together. While we have some talented guys, we do not have anyone that is going to do it by themselves. So we are going to play a team offense and a team defense.”

In the past, the team’s cohesiveness has led to

The men’s lacrosse team started their season strong with a dominant 19-7 win. Head Coach Marc Graham has scheduled games against top-tier teams to prepare the Brewers for Liberty League play.

in the nation. “If we do not play hard non-conference games, we will not be ready for our conference games,” elaborated Coach Graham.

The Brewers will face Montclair State University, Connecticut College and Williams College to name a few. These non-conference contests will take place early in the season and continue through Vassar’s spring break. The team hopes that these tough non-conference matchups will prepare them mentally and physically for their conference games—Coach Graham stated that the Liberty League is one of the toughest conferences in the country. In fact, the boys will face Rochester Institute of Technology, who is currently ranked third in Division III. As the season progresses, the players hope to grow and make improvements as a team. Boyd elaborated, “When thinking about improvement, I think we need to focus on communication; Coach Graham has really stressed that, especially on the defensive end.” Meanwhile, DeStasio explained, “We understand we have a tough schedule, and to succeed we need to compete for a full 60 minutes every game.”

As they continue to improve, the lacrosse team shows promise for a victorious season. The men’s next game will be held on Wednesday, March 2 in Montclair, N.J., versus Montclair State University.

Hailing from Essex Fells, N.J., Boyd is particularly excited to play the Red Hawks: “I know a lot of kids on the team because I went to high school with a bunch of them, so I definitely want to beat them. I think it should be a really fun game.”

While the boys are eager for non-conference games, they are most looking forward to their League contests. “We are most excited to get to our League games. The Liberty League is very competitive and we’re determined to improve our League play,” explained DeStasio. For the remainder of the season, the Brewers will host League battles against Skidmore, Clarkson, Rochester Institute of Technology and Bard College.

The team’s first League game is on March 26 versus the Skidmore Thoroughbreds at Weinberg Field.

Battled Brewer vets reminisce on long, fulfilling careers HOOPS continued from page 1

and finished second on the team in the categories of minutes-played (741 for the season), shots blocked (nine overall), as well as rebounds per game, averaging 6.9 boards each night. Drakeley also narrowly missed out on a triple-double in her penultimate college basketball game, as she dropped 24 points, grabbed 10 rebounds and provided seven assists against an overmatched Bard College. Perhaps the best way to express the scope of Drakeley’s accomplishments is simply to enumerate them. The senior has racked up a laundry list of prestigious selections for her academic and athletic performance: 2014-2015 Liberty League All-Academic Team, 2014-15 All-Met Writers Association Third Team, 2014-15 ECAC Upstate All-Star First Team, 2014-15 D3hoops. com All-Region Second Team, 2014-15 All-Liberty League First Team, 2014-15 Liberty League Player of the Week twice, 2014-15 Liberty League Honor Roll five times, 2013-14 Liberty League All-Academic, 2013-14 Liberty League Honor Roll 2/17 and 2013-14 Liberty League Honorable Mention. It would be difficult to overstate the impact Drakeley has had on Vassar’s basketball program.

Despite not getting the results they would have liked, the Brewers found some positive aspects to take away from the 2015-2016 season. The players, by working through and moving past the challenges posed by the first half of the season, also found themselves more connected to each other as teammates. One of the takeaways for the seniors was their time spent with teammates on and off the court.

“This past season...had its ups and downs but overall it was one of my favorite seasons I’ve played in throughout my entire career. We were forced to struggle through some adversity but that brought us all much closer together in the end,” said Drakeley.

Moon expressed a very similar sentiment: “I’m going to miss it all...but mostly my teammates, past and present. We were all so genuinely close to one another. I’m the most comfortable when I’m with all of them. They see me at my worst, they see me at best.”

The culmination of their last season as Vassar student-athletes also provided the Women’s bas-

ketball seniors an opportunity to reflect on their athletic careers, what they’ve gained from playing on the team, as well as how Basketball has affected their college experiences: “I’ve learned more from basketball than I have in the classroom. I’ve learned how to graciously handle...refs, celebrate the little things and how to be an effective engaging leader,” expressed Moon.

“Playing on the women’s basketball team here at Vassar has definitely been one of the best experiences of my life. The relationships that I have developed over the years and memories that I have formed are ones that I will hold onto for forever,” summarized Drakeley.

This season was the last for these four seniors, but the first for several freshmen, who could have had no better role models than Drakeley, Moon, Serafini and O’Connell. “[O’Connell and Serafini are] great leader[s], [Moon is] a great role model on and off the court,

[and Drakeley is a] really tenacious...hard worker,” freshman Julia Roellke said when asked to describe her senior leadership.

During the past four years, these seniors have played a part in two particularly outstanding seasons, as the Brewers won the Liberty League title and their first game in program history at the D3 National Tournament at the end of the 2013-2014 season, while also attaining a new school record for wins with 23.

The rising members of the Brewer women’s basketball team will have to compete next season without several of their established key starters and playmakers. Momentum is on their side, as the team finished this past season in encouraging fashion. While Serafini, Moon, Drakeley and O’Connell will no longer compete on the court for Vassar, they have laid the groundwork and given the necessary tools and mentorship to their teammates for them to achieve future success.

courtesy of Vassar Athletics

demic Team selection.

Milton, Ontario’s Rose Serafini used her height and strength throughout her career to establish herself as a defensive presence for the Brewer women. She closed out her time with Vassar as the team’s all-time leader in blocked shots, finishing the season with 80 rejections—breaking the previous single-season record she set herself last year, with 64 and her career with 192 overall. Most notably, she ranked 24 in the nation in DIII and second in the Liberty League for blocks during her junior year. She also led the Liberty League in overall blocked shots in Conference play during her senior season. Serafini started every one of the Brewer Women’s 25 games this year, snagging 183 rebounds over the course of the season. She averaged 6.7 points per game. The Brewers will surely miss her presence, both on offense and defense in the post, and role as defensive stalwart and general athletic playmaker.

Senior forward Colleen O’Connell, hailing from Maywood, N.J., proved to be one of Vassar’s more outstanding performers from the outset of her collegiate career. As a first-year player, she played in all 28 games, starting more than half.

O’Connell came close to averaging a double-double over the course of her first season. By the time her first year had ended, O’Connell had been selected as Liberty League Rookie of the Week on four separate occasions, had made the Liberty League All-Rookie Team, and had been tabbed as the D3Hoops.com All-East Region Rookie of the Year and Liberty League Co-Rookie of the Year.

She also garnered recognition for academics, earning Liberty League Honor Roll mentions four times throughout her career. O’Connell closed out her time with the Brewer Women’s Basketball team playing in 15 games, starting 9. She averaged 6.5 points per game, recording a season-high 19 points against Union College, as well as shooting an efficient 80 percent from the free throw line.

Caitlin Drakeley from Woodbury, Conn. played some of her best basketball in her final season, as she finished her last campaign for Vassar having started all 25 games, scoring on average almost 13 points a game. She led her teammates in steals,

The women’s basketball seniors have all boasted illustrious careers. All hold personal records and accomplishments. Despite an underwhelming season, they can all hold their heads high.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

March 3, 2016

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Page 19

The rise of Leicester Towns, Okafor signal hope City: An underdog story for ‘big man’ renaissance Robin Drummond Guest Columnist

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f you were to look at the Barclay’s Premier League table a year ago today, things would look unsurprising to any fan of world soccer. The teams in position to qualify for the UEFA Champions League through the first 28 games were Chelsea first with a commanding 66 points, Manchester City second with 58, Arsenal third with 54 and Manchester United fourth with 53.

All the way on the opposite end of the table, the three teams in danger of being relegated to the lower English League Championship division were Queens Park Rangers and Burnley tied with 22 points, followed by Leicester City, dead last, earning an abysmal 19 points. That late on in a season, any team that far down in the table is almost guaranteed to be relegated back to the Championship. Leicester’s fate was all but sealed.

However, the team managed to find a new gear, and were somehow able to win seven of their final ten games, lifting them up to 14th place, and, more importantly, out of the relegation zone.

During the following offseason, Leicester fired coach Nigel Pearson and brought in Claudio Ranieri, former coach of European soccer giants such as Valencia, Inter Milan and Chelsea. Despite the change, nobody was anywhere near close to considering Leicester legitimate title contenders in 20152016. When English-based bookmaker William Hill came out with the odds for each team to win the title before the season started, Leicester were picked as 5,000-1 long shots to lift the trophy.

As it stands today, the bookmakers are looking rather foolish. Someway, somehow, the Leicester City Foxes sit atop the Premier League table with only 10 games remaining.

According to William Hill, if they can manage to retain that spot for the rest of the year it would be the biggest upset in sporting history.

Only a handful of professional teams across any sport have ever overcome 100-1 odds to win, and virtually none have been able to overcome anything higher. To really put things in perspective, some other odds William Hill offers at 5,000-1 are Elvis is found alive, Christmas is the warmest day of the year in England, and the Yeti or Loch Ness Monster is proven to exist. Starting to get the picture of how improbable this run has been?

Experts are stumped as to how the Fox-

es have managed to turn things around so dramatically in just a year. Obviously, the coaching change has helped tremendously, but outside of that the squad looks virtually identical to how it did last season. The only difference is players are performing better.

Much, much better.

One of the biggest contributors has been striker Jamie Vardy. The 28 year old has already found the back of the net a league-leading 19 times this season, compared to only five all of last season. Earlier this year, Vardy broke Manchester United legend Rudd Van Nistelrooy’s all-time Premier League record by scoring in 11 consecutive games.

Ironically, the goal that clinched the record came against United. Vardy’s story is nearly as remarkable as Leicester’s. Just eight years ago he was making £30 a week playing for the Stocksbridge Park Steels in the lowest possible division of English professional soccer. He had to work part-time at a carbon factory plant in order to make a viable living.

After a few strong seasons with a number of other teams in higher leagues, Vardy was picked up by Pearson and Leicester for a fee of £1 million. After a disappointing first year at the club, Vardy scored 19 goals in his second season and helped them reach the Premier League for the first time in club history. With ten games remaining, one can only assume Vardy will continue to add to his already impressive total.

What Leicester City have already accomplished this year has been nothing short of a miracle. For a team that was convincingly the worst in their league for the majority of last year to now be in a legitimate position to win it is unheard of.

Quite frankly, it seems impossible to root against them, regardless of what team you support. How could you? Everybody can’t help but love a good underdog story and Leicester City is the ultimate underdog story. Being able to see a team overcome such improbable odds isn’t merely a once-in-alifetime opportunity, it could very will be a once-in-a-thousand lifetimes one.

If Leicester do manage to hold on to their lead in the coming months, they’ll make their fans elated. Particularly, John Pryke, who drunkenly played a £20 bet on his side to win the title a day before the season started.

At 5,000-1 odds, he’ll find himself £100,000 richer on the final day of the Premier League season if the standings hold.

Zach Rippe

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Sports Editor

innesota Timberwolves rookie Karl-Anthony Towns is not just good, he’s really good.

Now, I must admit, when the T-Wolves took him with the first pick in last year’s draft, my reaction was “meh.” I mean sure, he was the consensus number one overall pick backed by a plethora of scouts and draft experts who know much, much more about the game of basketball than I ever will.

Still, Jahlil Okafor looked really good. He had been downright dominant at Duke with a skill set that seemed lost among modern big men. He had been the number one recruit in the country coming out of high school and averaged 17.3 points per game and 8.5 rebounds per game his freshman year. Towns posted modest averages of 10.3 ppg and 6.7 rpg over at Kentucky. Granted, head coach John Calipari used a platoon system that limited the minutes of his players. Still, for much of their freshman seasons, Okafor was considered the better, more talented prospect.

This all began to change during the NCAA Tournament last year as Towns had a strong run and led then undefeated Kentucky all the way to the Final Four before they were upset by Wisconsin. Aside from already being a better defensive player, scouts noted that he had the raw tools to become better than Okafor offensively as well.

Eventually, Towns was selected first in the draft by the T-Wolves while the Sixers selected Okafor third. Both are currently playing for struggling franchises.

As the season started and Okafor ended his first game with 26 points and seven boards, fans and analysts alike became enamored with Okafor’s raw skill. His ball fakes and spin moves already had NBA vets in stitches. Towns began his season with consistent play that saw him take averages of around 14 points and eight rebounds into the second month of the season. He could score, but he did so efficiently with strong post moves and mid-range jumpers. Things began to turn sour for Okafor when videos surfaced online of people taunting him after a game in Boston.

He retaliated by throwing punches and had to be restrained. The Sixers requested that a security guard follow him around after games to help alleviate the tension. He was suspended by the Sixers for two games shortly after. Last Monday, TMZ released another video of Okafor. This time it was of a police chase where Okafor was going 108 mph in a 45 mph zone. However unfair and unfortunate they may be, these incidents have served to shape Okafor’s young reputation in the eyes of the media and some fans.

Towns, on the other hand, has been succeeding

exponentially in the quiet market of Minnesota.

Both the T-Wolves and Sixers are bad (the Sixers are a bit worse), but Towns has been making great strides and now is averaging a double-double with his averages up to 17.4 ppg, 10.3 rpg and 1.8 bpg. Towns’ recent play is particularly encouraging as he’s been averaging 22.7 ppg, 12.3 rpg, 2.1 apg and 2.1 bpg while shooting 54 percent from the floor, 37 percent from three and 87 percent from the free throw line in his past ten games. Towns has 13 games with 25+ points and 10+ rebounds this season. That’s good enough for fourth in the NBA. The rest of the rookie class has a combined six games with these numbers.

In an era ruled by guard play, dominant athletic wing players and three point shooting, the idea of elite big men who can control and effectively win games themselves has faded away. Dwight Howard is aging and has become somewhat of a farce since leaving Orlando. Demarcus Cousins has been downright dominant, but his team doesn’t win and his reputation limits his persona from being placed among the biggest names in the sport.

The idea of a winning big man who leads his team to glory consistently revolves around names like Tim Duncan, Shaquille O’Neal, Patrick Ewing and Hakeem Olajuwon. In fact, Towns’ rookie per 36 numbers (statistics scaled to 36 minutes of play) are nearly identical to these five hall of famers, with the exception that his free throw percentage is remarkably better. Towns’ game is reminiscent of the dominant big men that ruled the NBA over the past 20 years. Yet it also reflects a more modern approach. He is already a great mid-range jump shooter who can shoot from deep, yet he retains a strong, developing post game and an intensity on and off the court that has perhaps been aided by the tutelage of the aging Kevin Garnett.

Now all of this talk isn’t to say that Okafor is bad, that he will never amount to Towns, that he will never become an all-star or a winning player. I simply must attest that I was wrong about Towns. As any fan of the league should hope, both will develop into all-stars who boast a competitive rivalry with equally competitive teams.

We need more dominant big men in today’s NBA. Sure it’s fun and sometimes downright silly to watch Steph Curry chuck up 40-foot threes every night. He is literally changing the game and doing something no one has ever seen in the history of the league. But I miss those crafty post moves, the fear that arose when the Lakers would toss the ball into Shaq and he was guaranteed a bucket, the idea of the “dominant big man” that defines a team and can truly be a staple (and perhaps even a necessity) when it comes to winning basketball.

Unpacking China and their modern ‘soccer revolution’ Desmond Curran Guest Columnist

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n a recent development in the world soccer theater, a strange power has unexpectedly risen in the east. Over the past few weeks multiple high­-level players have been purchased at exorbitant prices and transferred away from their clubs.

The enormous amount of cash that has been thrown onto multiple negotiation tables has astounded even some of the largest clubs in Europe. Even more, these massive European clubs have been outbid by these buyers. Where could such an enormously strong financial backing come from? The answer lies with Donald Trump’s favorite business partner: China.

For those who can remember the 2008 Olympics, hopefully they can also remember China’s massive statewide build­ up of athletics leading up to the event. With the massive support of the Chinese government, Chinese athletes achieved superb performances in the total medal count, earning 100 total medals and 51 gold medals. With the Olympics now behind them, it appears that the Chinese government has now prioritized the creation of a successful soccer culture in China.

Despite its large power and influence in the world economy and political scene, China’s presence in the soccer world is almost unknown. Their national team has only qualified for one World Cup, in 2002, where the team

lost all three games. No superstar player has emerged from China to achieve glory abroad.

For a country that historically prides itself as being the “center of the world,” this is a shameful fact.

The Chinese government has acknowledged the fact that a massive overhaul is needed of the entire youth soccer development system in China. President Xi Jinping recently wrote a paper outlining a “Soccer Revolution” for the country. A prominent part of this plan is to eventually create 50,000 soccer “schools” to help develop youth talent across China’s massive population.

To any outside observer, it is not too difficult to realize that China now means business.

Building on the current plan for youth development, China has also now taken the initiative to also bring in as much foreign talent as possible. This impetus is the reason for the current splurge.

The most recent transfer has been that of the star Jackson Martinez from Atletico Madrid to Guangzhou Evergrande for a large sum of £32 million, or $44 million. This trade was massive, even by European standards, which have grown rapidly over the past few years.

What is more interesting is that Jackson Martinez is not quite even a superstar. In the 2014-2015 season last year, he was a standout player for the club Porto. However, Martinez has been fairly sub­par for one of the best clubs

in Europe. The fact that a player of his level was able to garner such a large transfer fee speaks volumes about the willingness of Chinese clubs to pay an absolute premium for foreign players.

But why would Chinese clubs want to bring in foreign players when their government wants to foster youth development? Would it not make more sense for clubs to capitalize on this by establishing their own private academies to attract top local talent?

In the long term planning for clubs like Guangzhou Evergrande that is exactly the plan. But in the meantime, clubs across China must also cultivate a cultural interest in soccer.

There will be no point to this entire project if the citizens aren’t incredibly interested in soccer.

When an entire developed nation becomes obsessed with soccer, it doesn’t matter how small or large it is, its teams will improve.

This is the reason why a country as small as the Netherlands has continuously been a major influence in world soccer, whereas a country as large and rich as the United States has never really held any importance.

By bringing in a variety of superstars that will light up the quality of play in the Chinese Super League, clubs hope to bring the sport of soccer into the limelight and into the hearts of fans across China. Progress has already been made in this category, as a variety of superstars from European soccer have come to play in

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

China.

Some of these players are Tim Cahill, Demba Ba, Didier Drogba, Nicolas Anelka, Paulinho, Asamoah Gyan, Robinho, Gervinho and Fredy Guarin. Adding to that list will be the players Ramires from Chelsea and Alex Teixeira from Shakhtar Donetsk.

One of the major concerns from observers is that this rapid expenditure on China’s behalf will begin to “suck out” a large margin of quality players from Europe. This is not what everyone should be fearing.

In some time, if the plan is executed well, the Chinese development system should begin to produce players that will be able to compete at the same level in Europe as those players that were transferred in. Then those players will become commercially available.

The real concern for any avid soccer fans is the potential of China. A country of 1.4 billion individuals will have an incredibly deep talent pool to pull from. Without a doubt, Chinese players will begin to step into the world stage and the national team itself will also begin to perform much better than ever before.

Perhaps China will become the first international team not from Europe or South America to win the World Cup. If their growth in soccer sustains itself, China’s gamble on their presence in world soccer will pay off and we may enter a new era of soccer, with a more eastern focus than ever before.

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March 3, 2016

Men’s tennis looks to cause racket in Liberty Leagues Annie Hsu

Guest Reporter

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he Vassar men’s tennis team has kicked off their lengthy main season this spring with strong performances and high expectations. “We had a pretty good fall season, and we came back this spring hitting the ground running. Everyone is looking really good, from the top of the lineup all the way through the bottom of the lineup, and we’ve already made great strides in just the one month we’ve had so far,” says senior captain Daniel Cooper. hus far, they beat Clark University 9-0 in their home match-opener, but fell to one of their toughest Liberty League rivals, Skidmore College, 6-3. The nationally ranked team has bested Vassar in addition to winning the League championships for the past few years. However,

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the Brewers showed one of their strongest performances against the Thoroughbreds. Head coach Alex Wong commented, “Though we lost 6-3, this is a big improvement from how we have done the last couple of years against Skidmore, and we are even more eager now to earn another opportunity to play them in the playoffs.“ Additionally, talented sophomore Gray Thurstone played his second college tennis match against Skidmore after battling terrible shoulder injuries during his freshman year and beginning of his sophomore year. Wong commented, “It was great having Gray back. I am so proud of how hard he worked to come back from his injuries. Throughout the time he was injured, he kept such a positive attitude and still helped the team in so many ways. It was great to see him come back and be out there representing the team he

courtesy of Vassar Athletics

Junior Nick Litsky has continued his strong play into the start of the men’s spring season. The Brewers lost to rival Skidmore, but gain Gray Thurstone back from injury, and are ready to compete.

loves so much.”

This past weekend the team took on University of Rochester and Rochester Institute of Technology (RIT). The Brewers fell to University of Rochester 8-1 on Saturday, but followed their loss with a 9-0 victory on Sunday against RIT. Cooper had a particularly successful weekend, securing the only win for the team against University of Rochester in addition to winning both his doubles and singles matches against RIT. This was his fourth consecutive singles win this season.

The season is still young and the team has over 10 competitive matches lined up for their spring season including a spring break trip to California.

The Brewers are led by Coach Wong who joined Vassar during their 2013 season. He has had lots of experience with winning competitively and has already established Vassar as a fearsome competitor during his short time here. He has high expectations for the team, “I am looking forward to a great season. We have a good mix of veteran players and younger players which is creating an exciting atmosphere in practice. I think this group has a lot of potential and we are looking forward to seeing what we can achieve this year. We have an extremely tough schedule with 10 of the top 15 teams in the region so we know we will have to be playing well throughout the entire season. The team is looking good.

They have already worked so hard and improved a lot in little time.“ As a player on the team, junior Nick Litsky elaborated, “I am really looking forward to playing matches against some of the top ranked teams. I always find it to be a really great experience to prove ourselves against the best teams in the nation.”

The team expressed similar goals across the board, “One of our major goals this season is to win the Liberty League Championships. It would also be important to get wins against nationally ranked opponents,” said junior Juan Felipe Laso.

Similarly Coach Wong expressed his hopes for the team, “Our short term goals are always to improve at each practice and be ready for the match

upcoming. But a longer term goal of ours is to put ourselves in a position to compete for the Liberty League Championship.“ Technically, “From the beginning of the season, we have been working on our doubles play.

The team has been working hard at this and has already improved significantly since the start of the season,” said Coach Wong.

A uniqueness to Vassar’s strong team is their great team dynamic. This dynamic has been widely acknowledged by the coaches as well as the players themselves, and is seen to be a real asset to the Vassar team. Coach Wong commented, “We are fortunate to have 12 guys that are passionate about representing Vassar. They are an extraordinarily close group and I believe that this will be extremely important as the season moves forward.” From within the team, Laso has also noticed the tightness of the team, “It is amazing to be in season and I feel the team has really come together this semester. The freshmen are fully integrated and are already making some great contributions to the program. This great team dynamic is one of the aspects that could enable our success this season.”

Going forward, Cooper says, “I’m really excited about the season as we have a special group of guys–I can’t wait to see how much we improve and grow together as a team and I think we can do some serious damage this season.“ The other senior captain on the team, Evan Udine says, “The season has been off to a good start. We’ve had a few tough losses and some good wins, but it just shows that we can compete with anyone in the country.” The Brewers have been working really hard, and their hard work has shown. Going into this season, everybody believes that Vassar will compete well with several nationally-ranked teams and keep improving after each match.

After competing against RIT just this past weekend, the team will continue on the road and play NYU next week and will stay on the road until April, after spring break when they play Yeshiva University at home.

Tough week shows Brewers have yet to hit their peak Hanna McGuire Guest Reporter

Men’s Volleyball

Men’s Basketball

sar team, made up of seniors Amreen Bhasin and Margaret Shepherd, junior Olivia Weiss and freshman Rose Hulsey-Vincent, first defeated No. 9 seed Fairleigh Dickinson University 45-42. The Brewers then dropped a close 45-42 match to No. 5 seed Brandeis University. After the first round of play, the match was tied 5-5, but Elizabeth Feller of Brandeis achieved a 9-2 spread in round three to push ahead 15-9. Although Hulsey-Vincent decreased the deficit to 15-11, it wasn’t enough to defeat the Owls.

Men’s Fencing

The Vassar men’s epee and sabre team competed in the 2016 United States Collegiate Squad Championships Sunday at Princeton University.

The Brewers finished seventh overall at the end of competition. The epee squad earned a bye as the No. 4 seed and resultantly faced Yale University in the round of eight. Despite 13 and 10 touches by sophomore George Whiteside and junior Ry Far-

The Vassar men’s basketball team traveled to Saratoga Springs, N.Y. on Feb. 24 to face Skidmore College in the semifinal Liberty League Championship game. With an unfortunate 82-71 loss, the season for the Brewers is now at a close. The Brewer underdogs came out on top 36-31 after the first half, shooting 52 percent to the defending champion’s 39. However, the Thoroughbreds completely changed the game in the second half, raising their shooting percentage to 58 while holding the Brewers to 36. Despite the loss, Vassar played a high quality game, with four men scoring in double figures. Sophomore Jesse Browne continued to prove his skills with 18 points and three blocks while senior captain Erikson Wasyl contributed 14 points and four rebounds. Freshman center Paul Grinde scored 13 points while junior Mickey Adams totaled 10. The Brewers ended their season with a 12-14 overall standing and an 8-8 conference record.

ley respectively, the Brewers fell to the Bulldogs 42-29. The following contest against Brandeis University was a nail-biter as the Vassar squad lost 45-44. At the start of the match, the Brewers held the lead, but Brandeis’s Hunter Stusnick retaliated to take the advantage. Although sophomore Jonathan Alperstein pulled back to tie things up at 44, Thomas Hearn of BU earned the winning touch.

The Brewer sabre group, seeded No. 7, cruised past Incarnate World in the first round 45-14.

Sophomore Eli Polston and seniors Zachary Wilson and Elam Coalson each contributed 15 touches in the victory. The following match against No. 2 Princeton proved more difficult as Vassar dropped 45-39. Following the loss, the men faced No. 6 Columbia University in the table of four and again battled hard but ultimately fell 45-39. In the seventh place match against Brandeis, Vassar was victorious 45-42 in another close match. Coalson earned seven touches to take the lead, which the Brewers maintained throughout the contest.

courtesy of Vassar Athletics

The high-ranked Brewer squad had no time for rest this week, facing No. 12 New York University on Tuesday and No. 1 Springfield College and Lasell College on Saturday. The men traveled to NYC for the UVC game and fell in a 1-3 contest 25-20, 22-25, 13-25, 22-25. Despite capturing the first set thanks to six kills by senior standout Reno Kriz, Vassar couldn’t hold the Violet offense back. Sophomore middle hitter Matthew Knigge helped the Brewers gain a lead in the second, but to no avail as NYU battled harder to capture the set. The men struggled in the third, posting nine errors and dropping to a 33 percent side out rate.

Although Vassar managed to regain strength in the fourth, NYU outlasted them for the win. Over the weekend, the Brewers trekked to Springfield, Mass. for the Saturday double-header. The No. 1 Pride pushed pass the Brewers 25-18, 25-19, 25-15 in the first game. A kill by sophomore Zechariah Lee in the first put the men at arms length from Springfield 18-15, but the top team regained momentum to take the set. The Pride continued to show dominance, hitting .73 in the second set without any errors. Seven errors from the Vassar offense helped Springfield capture the fourth set and the win. Despite the loss, Knigge hit a matchbest 15 kills while Lee finished with 24 assists and five digs. In the second contest, the squad edged past Lasell in three sets with scores of 25-21, 2522, 25-7. The Brewer offense took control in the match, hitting .488 overall, specifically .533 and .647 in the second and third sets respectively. The men accelerated their play in the fourth set, holding the Lasers to just two kills. In the match, Lee posted 36 assists and nine digs, both team-bests, while freshman George Diehl and junior Quinn Rutledge both earned seven kills. The week of play places the men 12-4 overall and 2-2 in conference play.

started out the match strong, sweeping all three doubles spots, but it was sophomore Courtney Geiss who clinched the match in a decisive 6-0, 6-0 victory. Unfortunately, Vassar couldn’t maintain its dominance in their match against St. Lawrence on Sunday. The Brewers went into singles play after losing two out of three doubles matches. Sophomore duo Morgan Fitzgerald and Kate Christensen were the only pair to secure a win at the number three spot, 8-5. Christensen and senior captain Kelsey Van Noy rebounded in singles to give the Brewers a 3-2 lead, followed shortly by junior Shayna Becker who won the final match for the Brewers. Freshman Morgane Flournoy fell 6-4, 6-1 at the number five spot while Fitzgerald and Geiss fell at the fourth and second singles positions in long three-set matches. The Brewers are now 3-1 in Liberty League standings and 4-2 overall.

Women’s Fencing Women’s Tennis

The Vassar women’s tennis team faced challenging competition on the road in two Liberty League contests. On Saturday the Brewers defeated Rochester Institute of Technology 9-0. They

On Sunday, the Vassar women’s epee team traveled to Princeton, New Jersey for the 2016 United States Collegiate Squad Championships.

The squad finished seventh among the 11 competing teams in the event. The No. 8 seed Vas-

Junior captain Trey Cimorelli and the successful men’s volleyball team have been battling a tough stretch of play that has seen them lose narrowly to some of the best competition in DIII volleyball.

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